#every day in every way i find new ways to love nie huaisang

[pocketsizedowls]

The following is a possible timeline of Jiang Cheng's romantic (?) endeavors:

He meets Wei Wuxian when he was a toddler. Since Wei Wuxian is a little older and a little taller, Jiang Cheng thinks he's kind of cool, even if he's also a toddler. A few years later Wei Wuxian comes to live at Lotus Pier full-time. They start sharing a room and it takes only about a month for Jiang Cheng to realize that Wei Wuxian, who he now sees as a brother, is a fucking idiot.

Wei Wuxian follows Jiang Cheng to the Cloud Recesses when they are 15 and they meet Nie Huaisang, who is timid but mischievous. Nie Huaisang runs an illegal pornography distribution business without ever getting caught, not even after Wei Wuxian gets booted from Gusu and Lan Qiren grows eyes on the back of his head. It piques Jiang Cheng's interest. Nie Huaisang kisses Jiang Cheng on the last day of school before skipping away to Qinghe.

In The Untamed, Jiang Cheng meets Wen Qing around this time as well. He grew up watching Jiang Yanli pine after the peacock and, after making a list of qualities that he would like for the future Madam Jiang to have, he thinks Wen Qing is a good choice for courtship. She's smart and pretty, just like his jiejie. His mom will probably like her, which is... preferable. Either way, Jiang Cheng courts Wen Qing by bringing her a comb he bought at Caiyi Town, just like Yanli says he should. He leaves the encounter feeling proud of himself.

The romantic (?) side plots of Jiang Cheng's life take a pause for the next 5ish years because he's busy trying not to die. Lotus Pier burns, the Sunshot Campaign goes by, and good news! He succeeds in not dying. Bad news! Every other Jiang didn't. So, he spends the next 10 years after that recovering from not-dying. Understandably, it put a slight damper on his mood and now, he's been blacklisted from every matchmaker in the country! Oh well. He's got his hands full anyways, with a nephew to raise and a sect to rebuild, yada yada yada.

Soon enough, Jiang Cheng forgets all about his youthful naivete and teenage follies. Growing up has a way of hardening your soul and rewiring your memories, so he spends most of his days as Sect Leader Jiang overworking until he feels absolutely nothing. Raising Jin Ling brings some light into his life, of course, but he's a Jin, not a Jiang. He doesn't get to spend all his time at Lotus Pier, no matter how much Jiang Cheng would secretly love that. In a matter of years, chasing down demonic cultivators became his only source of dopamine. It's an incredibly self-indulgent thing. He investigates every smoke trail, every rumor, and every crudely-drawn Yiling Patriarch poster with the intention of destroying Wei Wuxian the moment he comes back. He tells himself he doesn't miss him but finds himself pausing the witch hunt every year on October 31st, Wei Wuxian's birthday.

At the Guanyin Temple, Jiang Cheng, Lan Wangji, and the new-returned Wei Wuxian take down Jin Guangyao with help of a dubiously-intact Nie Mingjue and dubiously-intentioned Nie Huaisang. Jiang Cheng returns to Lotus Pier with his (?) golden core feeling lopsided in his dantian, only to receive a wedding invitation barely a few months later from Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. He wonders for a second if they intend to make amends...? Then he banishes the thought as soon as it comes.

He attends the wedding only to save face for the Jiang Sect because people would surely talk if he doesn't show. He escapes the festivities by the time the banquet starts and walks right into Lan Xichen on his way out of the Cloud Recesses.

"Zewu-jun," he says, "aren't you supposed to be in seclusion?"

Lan Xichen smiles. "Yes."

"Then why are you out here?"

"My brother is getting married," Lan Xichen says, "why shouldn't I be here?"

"If you're truly here for the wedding," sighs Jiang Cheng, "then go inside? Pat your brother on the back? Eat a piece of cake?"

Lan Xichen's smile wobbles, but Jiang Cheng doesn't let up. He's not stupid. Sure, Lan Xichen is in seclusion, which means his time is his own and he can do anything he wants, but Lan Sect would definitely be alarmed to find their sect leader grimly wandering the grounds of the Cloud Recesses on a celebratory night. So.

"Well?" Jiang Cheng asks, pointed.

Lan Xichen's expression darkens. Jiang Cheng thinks anger is a good look on.

"Sect Leader Jiang," Lan Xichen starts, eerily peacefully, "you tell me to go inside, to congratulate my brother, and to eat. But did you do any of those things? It's barely nightfall and you look about ready to leave Gusu. With no Lan disciple walking you to the gates, however, you resemble a student sneaking out of class. Here at the Cloud Recesses, that crime is worthy of 20 lashes. Would you like to explain your behavior?"

Under any other circumstance, Jiang Cheng would lash out against this kind of condescension, but Lan Xichen is swaying under the moonlight like a reed. The sight of the strong, courteous Lan Xichen at his lowest unlocks something inside Jiang Cheng, a rough-around-the-edges feeling associated with flashes of memories that he can no longer fully remember. A shared bedroom. A kiss at school. A comb wrapped in cloth. A bowl of pork rib and lotus soup delivered to the front lines of war. A bloodied hairpin tucked in a purple waist stash. A declaration of love under the watchful gaze of dangerous enemies.

The feeling threatens to knock him over, but this is Jiang Cheng we're talking about. Naturally, he tucks the strange feeling back inside the box where it came from and locks it once again with the key. Meanwhile, he offers to walk Lan Xichen to the banquet. He says to him: I'll stay with you if you want. I'll even eat a piece of cake with you. Lan Xichen declines--thank goodness--so they make their way toward the Hanshi instead.

"What do you want to do now," Jiang Cheng asks when they make it to Lan Xichen's residence. He hovers at the dorm frame like a teenage boy trying his best not to intrude, leaning on one foot and then the other.

Lan Xichen considers Jiang Cheng's words for a moment and says, "I don't know. It's been a while since I had company, so please," He leaves the door wide open, gesturing inside the Hanshi, "come on in. Make yourself at home."

Jiang Cheng takes a ginger step across the threshold.

[winepresswrath]

I am constantly torn between

looking at the Yunmeng Siblings and the horrible, devastating series of tragedies that befell them and getting deep in my sad feelings about it

taking a look next door at the Jiggy-Xichen-Mingjue-Huaisang clusterfuck and just being like yeah ok POINT MADE. I will take this w and content myself with how 2/3 of them are alive and so is their nephew and they can be in a room together without tricking each other into stabbing any other people they used to love.

[demoiselledefortune]

Fics in which Jin Guangyao survives the ending (or is reborn, or timetravel shenanigans happen)

Where JGY is kept at Gusu by Lan Xichen

The Deep Dominion by Madrana 14234 words, Explicit

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31988605

After the clan leaders finally turn against Jin Guangyao, he is saved from his execution by Lan Xichen asking for him to be instead imprisoned in a house near the Cloud Recesses. Here, his freedom and all his power taken from him, with not much to do but remember all he once had and wait for Lan Xichen to visit him, A-Yao tries to figure out whether love alone is enough when everything else has crumbled into dust.

After Cruelty by Yen 1385 words, Not Rated

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25970539

Lan Xichen swallowed hard. Just the thought of the inevitable outcome made his blood run cold. The mental image of Jin Guangyao, forced to his knees before the baying mob, neck bared and waiting for the executioner's blade to fall… he could not even bear to think of it. 

Really, there was only one way out.

Epistle from Gentian by zebaoth 5552 words, Mature (check the tags this one is pretty dark)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23330995

Jin Guangyao survived the confrontation at the Guanyin temple. Now he lives in exile, under house arrest, at the Gentian House in the cloud recesses. Lan Xichen resides with him, ensuring that he does not leave his gilded prison.

This is the story of how their shared past and their shared present forces Lan Xichen to unravel.

Give no Quarter by thefaceofno 1500 words, Teen and up

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20910713

When you die, how long does it take for people to forget you?

If they forget you before you die, is that the same as dying?

Confinement by clockwork_spider 2668 words, Mature (also pretty dark)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17533835/chapters/41312477

After the events of the GuanYin temple, Lan XiChen took Jin GuangYao back to Cloud Recess and hid him away. Isolated with only Lan XiChen for the occasional company, Jin GuangYao slowly loses his mind. 

Content warning: solitary confinement, Stockholm syndrome, suicide ideation, self-harm, cat murder

In the smoke and dying ember, I’ll find you by Aria_Chu 3641 words, General Audience

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20041918

Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao live happily away from the cultivation world following the events of Guanyin Temple...

(ACTUALLY THEY DONT)

Timeloop/Time travel

Defying Your Fate by Fortune Maiden 6219 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32674597

After the clan leaders finally turn against Jin Guangyao, he is saved from his execution by Lan Xichen asking for him to be instead imprisoned in a house near the Cloud Recesses. Here, his freedom and all his power taken from him, with not much to do but remember all he once had and wait for Lan Xichen to visit him, A-Yao tries to figure out whether love alone is enough when everything else has crumbled into dust.

RoundTwo by theRecorder 9,853 words, Mature (Sangyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/series/1828003

Before the temple

Before the siege

Before the campaign

Nie HuaiSang and Meng Yao suddenly wake up in the time and bodies before all of it

And now they meet for round two after three different previous lifetimes

Contemplate the darkness, crawl your way out by Gotcocomilk 7323 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20216506/chapters/47907925

It began, as it always did, above the stairs.

It would end at the bottom, where he pulled himself up and the beast in his skin roared. It would end standing above the stairs again, with gentle fingers gripping his.

But it began where he made every one of the most fateful decisions in his life.

Empathy by clockwork_spider 30062 words, Mature (Gen but centered on Nie Mingjue and JGY’s relationship)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16571534/chapters/38830160

Stuck in the same coffin, Nie MingJue and Jin GuangYao’s souls were pulled together in an extended Empathy. Having experienced Jin GuangYao’s entire life from his perspective, Nie MingJue finds himself back in his younger body.

Before the Sunshot Campaign. Before Meng Yao was kicked down from the Koi Tower.

Where did the Stygian Tiger Amulet Go? By WangYue 24704 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16342619/chapters/38236091

Inspired by the movie "Source Code"

This is the story of Jin Guangyao's repeated deaths in the goal of changing history, getting out of the coffin after his (first) death, and getting together with Lan Xichen, not in that exact order.

Reevaluation by Nirejski 2734 words, General Audience

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28653915

First order of business: don’t underestimate Nie Huaisang, Jin Guangyao decided when he figured out that the bizarre talisman he’d found that promised to abrogate his greatest regrets had actually somehow implausibly worked and he was back in the past.

As for the rest of it, though - for Nie Mingjue, for Lan Xichen...

It was time to reevaluate.

(not really shippy)

Rebirth/Reincarnation

Grief Negotiation by Nomette 17513 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20016826/chapters/47395921

Five years after the events of Guanyin Temple, Lan Xichen is gifted a folio of songs written by Jin Guangyao. But the music he plays is more than just a song, and soon Lan Xichen's life and happiness hang on the brink as he struggles to unravel the mysteries surrounding him and save Jin Guangyao before it's too late.

Written for XiYao week 2019, for the prompt of "Alternative Ending."

A Troublesome Charge by Moonsheen 14208 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23301232

Sixteen years after the collapse of the Guanyin Temple in Yunping, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji must investigate a new mystery: the curious case of Nie Huaisang's entirely too knowledgeable young cousin, who has arrived at the Cloud Recesses with a peculiar set of skills, a shady past, and smile that's just a touch too familiar...

Spirits come back, after all.

Further than I ever had by SetsuntaMew 6279 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21256811

One day, when the skies are blue and the sun is shining brightly, things will feel small and less inconceivably impossible. When fields are green, when they’ve shed the skins and scars of the past, perhaps it will be better.

Life is a never-ending flow, a place for second or third or sixth chances, until one of them is right.

The sun shines overhead, time marches onward, and the many threads of fate weave together to bring two broken and repaired souls towards each other once again.

The Fox and the Deer by mercyandmagic 59308 words, Mature (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19975780/chapters/47289019

When Jin Guangyao finds himself resurrected through another body-sacrificing ritual, he plans to fulfill the caster’s wish and flee as soon as possible. Unfortunately, it seems the previous owner of his body had business with Lan Sect. Post-canon. Written for XiYao Week 2019, with each chapter loosely corresponding to the day's prompts.

Return to the Canva of Life by Shiome 5799 words, Teen and Up (Xiyao)

https://archiveofourown.org/series/2275868

 Lan Xichen has spent so long becoming one with this house, this mountainside, this green. He knows immediately that someone new has set foot among the gentians.

 The man standing among blue flowers is young, svelte and elegant in his movements as he steps towards the Gentian House with purpose. He walks with such grace the flowers barely bend beneath his feet.

(120 years after the temple, someone sneaks into the Cloud Recesses looking for Zewu-jun.)

[stiltonbasket]

Hmm mdzs but nmj is a woman. your thoughts? How would it go?

“You said that Nie Mingjue still has some fondness for you,” his father says idly. “Is that so?”

In truth, Jin Guangyao no longer knows if Da-jie has any fondness left for him at all. She only tolerates him for Da-ge’s sake, and takes every opportunity to tell him exactly why she disapproves of him and everything he stands for.

But perhaps that is a sign of Nie Mingjue’s regard, because she criticizes everyone she loves except for her first sworn brother, Lan Xichen.

“It is.” Jin Guangyao hesitates. “What would fuqin have me do with her fondness, then?”

“You’re growing sharper, Guangyao,” Jin Guangshan replies, pleased. “Well, if Nie Mingjue still cares for you after what you did to her clansmen, that is more than I could have hoped for. I want you to marry her.”

Jin Guangyao nearly drops his brush. “What?”

“It would not be a bad match. She would not have sworn brotherhood with you if she had misgivings about your background, and she would need some other cause to reject you as her husband if I observed all the proper steps to propose a betrothal. She is now twenty-eight and past the age of marriage, so I do not think any man she might have among the Nie will still be unwed--and you are already capable in managing her household matters, so you would be able to ruzhui if she preferred.”

The first emotion that rushes through him is a hot flicker of rage, that his father would ask him to ruzhui even as part of a ruse--for how could such a ruse end, save by the death of one of the parties? It is only too clear that this hypothetical wedding is meant to be an assassination attempt in disguise, one that Jin Guangyao will have to carry out in the darkness of the Unclean Realm; and the worst part is that Jin Guangyao already has a woman in his heart, a woman who would fight her own family so that they could be together, a woman so respectable that marrying her would have washed some of the stain from himself--

“I will do it,” he hears himself say. “May Father handle the betrothal proceedings however he sees fit.”

__

“Huaisang?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you think I’m going blind?”

Her little brother squints at her over the top of his latest fan--a ridiculous forest-green affair this time, to match with the new dark-green silk robes he bought for his last birthday--and frowns. “You spotted me running away from saber practice from the other side of the compound this morning,” he points out. “Da-jie, is this a trick question? I promise I’ll do a little training with Anxing next week, I just--”

“That’s not what I mean,” Nie Mingjue snaps, flinging a letter across her desk. “Read this.”

Nie Huaisang unfolds the peony-scented envelope and gasps theatrically at its contents. “Da-jie!”

“So I’m not going blind, then,” she snorts. “That pompous old lout really does want me to marry A-Yao.”

Her brother gulps. “What are we going to do? I know you don’t like him, not like that.”

“I need another match.”

Huaisang jumps and falls off his chair. “What?”

“I can’t reject this without a reason,” Nie Mingjue mutters. “If it was anyone else, I could have, but A-Yao...he’s my sworn didi, and that complicates things. He’s offered the execution of Xue Yang for my dowry, after the Jins finish questioning him, and I doubt they want to execute him at all--they’re too desperate to get that shard of the yintie he’s still supposed to have. And Jin Guangshan even mentioned that A-Yao could marry in, so he’s willing to do a great deal to push this marriage through.”

“And you wouldn’t want him here,” her brother surmises. “Not now that he’s got Jin-zongzhu’s ear.”

“I wouldn’t want him living here anyway. Seeing him once a week is enough for me, and...”

“...And what?”

Nie Mingjue rises to her feet. “Tell Zonghui I’m going out,” she orders. “I’ll be back tomorrow, or maybe the day after that. If any Jins come here while I’m gone, distract them.”

“But where are you going?” Huaisang asks, scurrying after her. “You can’t deal with this by hiding, jie!”

“I told you, I’m finding another husband! I’m going to marry Lan Xichen.”

“You’re--da-jie, what do you mean!?”

___

“I’m here to marry your nephew,” Nie Mingjue announces, when Lan Qiren comes down to meet her at the Cloud Recesses’ main gate. “I have a thousand silver ingots for the bride pride, a hundred bolts of white silk, a qin made from markhor horn and mother of pearl, six flutes made of mutton-fat jade, and a robe made from sable fur. Does Lan-xiansheng find these betrothal gifts satisfactory?”

For some reason, Lan Qiren heaves a deep, loud sigh and buries his face in his hands.

“I want Xichen, by the way,” she adds, somewhat unnecessarily. “Wangji’s a good child, but he’s just a baby. And I’ve loved Xichen since before I was old enough to hold a dao.”

Lan Qiren lets out a wild hacking sound that could have been a shriek of laughter. Or maybe he has a piece of cabbage in his throat? It’s not like Nie Mingjue can really tell, when it comes to her future uncle-in-law.

“Your gifts are more than satisfactory,” he whispers at last, straightening up and bowing so low that his head nearly strikes the ground. “Nie-zongzhu, I thought you would never ask!”

[lilnasxvevo]

Um. AU idea I am calling the “16 months” AU that’s a modern AU where instead of disappearing/being dead for 16 years Wei Ying just disappears for 16 months and it goes like this:

A lot of things go to shit very quickly but not in a “people die” sort of way and it leads to Wei Ying, FAMOUSLY Emotionally Stable Guy, assuming without actually asking anybody that everybody he loves is mad at him or disappointed in him or doesn’t want to see him anymore, so he deletes all his social media accounts and leaves his phone behind because he doesn’t want to be tempted to ever contact any of them again because all he does is make their lives worse and they probably don’t want to hear from him anyway, and he packs up all his stuff and picks a direction and just. Leaves.

Wei Ying not responding to texts for a few hours or days is pretty common behavior, so no one worries at first. That’s not true. Lan Zhan worries a lot, because Wei Ying always responds to his texts as soon as he sees them (because Wei Ying is always so astonished that he got a text from Lan Zhan, even though it happens fairly regularly, that he texts Lan Zhan back as soon as he can so Lan Zhan never feels inconvenienced or annoyed by him, because then he might stop texting him). But when he contacts other friends and family of Wei Ying they all go “well that’s normal” and dismiss it when he says “it’s not normal for ME” so it takes a few days for everyone else to become as alarmed as Lan Zhan is.

He’s reported missing. They put up actual physical Missing posters all over the place and put up digital missing posters on every social media website that exists. They go through all his things trying to find anything that might indicate what happened. Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng both interrogate anyone they can find who Wei Ying has ever spoken to. No one knows anything.

Jiang Cheng is convinced Wei Ying has just run off somewhere, pointing to the deleted social media accounts as proof that he planned this. Lan Zhan just doesn’t think Wei Ying would leave without saying goodbye. No one wants to hear it, but he thinks Wei Ying is dead.

Wei Ying, meanwhile, has done something very Wei Ying like, like becoming a bartender in a small town or something. He gets a cheap phone because you do need a phone to be a person in the world these days, but he only saves the numbers of his boss and coworkers and the people he meets in this new place, because no matter where he goes or how miserable he is, Wei Ying can’t just NOT make friends.

He starts introducing himself under a different name because he just doesn’t feel like Wei Ying anymore.

He doesn’t make any new social media accounts, because if he has an account it’s too easy from there to reach out to Jiang Cheng or Lan Zhan, since of course he still remembers both their usernames on everything ever (he still remembers Jiang Cheng’s goddamn Club Penguin username!), and he can’t do that. He still has their numbers memorized too, of course, but convinces himself he doesn’t.

A year passes that way, and pretty soon it’s been…just about sixteen months since he left. He’s not—happy, exactly, and he still misses all of them, all the time, but he knows they’re better off without him, and knowing he did a good thing for the people he loves the most is going to have to be good enough for him.

Then one day when he’s at work one of the busboys, a kid named Mo Xuanyu who he’s kinda friendly with, leans across the bar and says quietly, “Wei Ying?” and, having spent much more of his life answering to that name than not, Wei Ying automatically turns and says “Yeah?” before he realizes that Mo Xuanyu shouldn’t know that name.

Mo Xuanyu bites his lip. “I thought that was you. Hey, I know you’re not really online, but like…have you seen this?” He pushes his phone across the bar, open to—Wei Ying’s heart clenches—Nie Huaisang’s Instagram page. Then he sees the post Mo Xuanyu was pointing out.

It’s a missing poster.

Of him.

His first thought is, How melodramatic. He reads it automatically: height, weight, eye color, hair color, last seen, if you know anything please call—and he knows that phone number, and it turns out he does still know Jiang Cheng’s number by heart.

His throat feels tight, too tight, and he tries to push the phone back but Mo Xuanyu’s hand darts out to hold it firmly in place. “Did you read the caption?”

“I can’t.”

“Want me to read it to you?”

“Please don’t.”

“What’s going on with this, man? Are you hiding from these people or something? Because I read somewhere that sometimes missing posters like this will sound really sincere but they’re really by like, abusers trying to get their victims back—“

Wei Ying shakes his head violently.

“No?” Mo Xuanyu says.

“They’re better off without me,” Wei Ying manages to rasp out.

Mo Xuanyu’s eyes get sad. “Well, I can’t imagine that. You’re a pretty great guy. I know I’m glad I met you. But—listen. It’s up to you. If you don’t want to contact them—I mean, that’s your choice, but actually I want you to know that if you don’t at least tell them that you’re alive and safe then I think that’s kind of fucked up. They love you.”

“They think I’m DEAD?”

“Some people do. I read through the hashtag—you have a fucking hashtag, by the way, #findweiying—and some of the posts in there are like. At least tell us…” Mo Xuanyu’s voice falters. “Like, tell us where you hid the body.”

Wei Ying hangs his head, braces his palms on the edge of the bar. “Fuck. I didn’t…fuck.”

Mo Xuanyu doesn’t seem to know what to do with that. “Well, anyway, I gotta get back to work or I’ll get yelled at. I’ll send you a screenshot of the poster so you have the number to call.”

“I don’t—wait wait wait, come back a second, does everybody think I’m dead? Who thinks I’m dead?”

“Uh, let me think…uh, the only person who I remembered seemed really weirdly convinced that you were dead was like…I think he had ‘rabbits’ in his username.”

“Cloudshapedrabbits?”

“Yeah, that was it.”

“Why would Lan Zhan think I’m dead?”

“I dunno. Listen, I really gotta go.”

Wei Ying does not remember a single thing about the rest of his shift.

The next day, Mo Xuanyu texts him saying that he went through more of the posts of “that rabbits guy” because he couldn’t stop wondering why he thought Wei Ying was dead, he thought that was weird even before Wei Ying commented on it, but he found a post from over a year ago about him insisting that Wei Ying would have contacted him, wouldn’t have wanted him to worry, wouldn’t have left without saying goodbye.

Wei Ying is dialing that beloved phone number before he can think. He doesn’t have time to scream at himself what the FUCK are you doing? before the dialing noise stops as his call is answered.

A familiar deep voice says, “Hello, you’ve reached—“

“Lan Zhan.”

“Wei Ying?” When Wei Ying doesn’t immediately respond, his throat doing that silly closing-up thing again, Lan Zhan speaks again. “Wei Ying, say something, are you still there?”

“I’m here,” he manages. “I’m here. Hi, Lan Zhan.”

“Wei Ying, where have you been? Where are you? Are you safe? Is it really you? What happened?”

“I—“ Wei Ying hadn’t really had a plan for what he was going to say—somewhere between teasing Lan Zhan for thinking he was dead or just saying that you said I wouldn’t leave without saying goodbye, so, goodbye. But he hadn’t expected the openly frantic tone in Lan Zhan’s steady voice, the number of questions that by Lan Zhan’s standards was an avalanche of words.

He says the only thing that feels right. “I’m sorry, Lan Zhan. I didn’t think anyone would care. I didn’t think you would care.”

He hears Lan Zhan take a shuddering breath. “I do. Of course I care about you. Wei Ying.”

“Did you miss me, Lan Zhan?”

“Yes. Every second of every day. We all do. Wei Ying, come back.”

“Ah, I can’t do that, Lan Zhan, you’re all so much better off without me. All I do is mess things up.”

“Your brother has lost 40 pounds because he barely eats anymore. Your sister has postponed her wedding until they find you.” He’s silent, but even after so long without him, Wei Ying can still tell when it’s the kind of silence that means he’s not done talking yet, just thinking. “Wei Ying. I have not smiled in sixteen months. Please never say no one cares about you.”

“God, see? All I do, all I can do is fuck things up and make people sad!”

“Wei Ying. Come home. We need you. I need you.”

“Ah, Lan Zhan. I missed you so much.” Wei Ying clucks his tongue a few times as he thinks. “Okay, Lan Zhan, here’s what I’m gonna do—I’m gonna send you my address and you’re gonna come visit me and try to talk me into coming back with you. Can you do that?”

“Yes. I will, Wei Ying.”

“And—can you—Uh. Can you tell Jiang Cheng you found me but like please don’t give him my number yet? I really don’t think I can handle talking to him right now. You don’t even need to say I called you, you can just say, like, you got a letter or something!”

“I will tell him you are safe. You are safe?”

“Yes. Yes, Lan Zhan, I’m safe. I just ran away. I’m sorry.”

“Please don’t apologize. Send me the number as soon as you can. Please call me or text me regularly until I get there so I know you’re still all right and that you haven’t changed your mind about seeing me.”

“Lan Zhan! Okay, I will. I’m gonna hang up now, but please tell Jiang Cheng and Yanli that I love them, okay?”

“I will.”

“And—I love you, too. You know that, right?”

“I love you too. Wei Ying.”

“Okay. Talk to you soon. Bye.”

“See you soon.”

[darkandstormyart]

Xicheng fic recs

(figured i might make a list of my own)

(to be expanded as i dig out more treasure/remember stuff)

in no particular order:

Deep as the Yearning Night by FreckledStarKnight

“At first, it was pure chance. The second time was accidental. And the third time? Well, they say the third time’s the charm, after all. Lan Xichen discovers that Jiang Wanyin sings beautifully and is immediately enamored by it. His pursuit of Jiang Wanyin’s secret talent leads to a discovery and a series of events that he did not anticipate at all. Not that he’s complaining, of course. He got what he came for and more. Or, how two sect leaders get together through the song called love. CQL-verse.“

post-seclusion lxc

trying to get jc to sing

bonus lxc & jin ling feels i hadn’t considered before

cute

Always use protection by hesselives

“In which Lan Wangji attempts to hire a new bodyguard for his older brother, a well-known traveling exorcist. Jiang Wanyin doesn’t even make his carefully considered list of Top Ten Candidates, and yet here he is.

Lots of wandering in the countryside, distant yelling, and mildly inconvenient spirits.”

bodyguard au

honestly just really intersting worldbuilding

Rewrite the stars by Arashii

“Five great kingdoms have been fighting for years and when the kingdom of Yunmeng is destroyed, the Crown Prince Jiang Cheng vanishes.In Gusu, Lan Xichen makes an offer impossible for Jiang Cheng to refuse. His life or revenge? There’s only one option and Jiang Cheng swears loyalty to the man he hated the most his whole life, the Crown Prince of Gusu, Lan Xichen himself.Written for XiChengFest2020 - Day 4“

ROYALTY AU ROYALTY AU

enemies to lovers!

flashbacks! i love flashbacks so much ohmygod

No paths are bound by Arashii

“In seclusion, Lan Huan has the support of a ghost no one has seen since the massacre of Yunmeng Jiang. His feelings start changing with the often visits and conversations they share. Before Lan Huan can confess though, he ascends, leaving everything and everyone behind him.

Two hundred years later, back to the Human Realm and without powers, the Martial God Zewu-Jun has a mission to uphold. His Heavenly Calamity started. The clues are little and the support comes in the most unexpected form, the current Ghost King: Sandu Shengshou. Now they need to stick together to contain a menace that is slowly growing.“

TGCF AU TGCF AU

ghost king jiang cheng come on

doesn’t follow tgcf plot, just the setup so no spoilers

jiang cheng gets the dogs and the xichen he deserves

once upon a dream by cafedeolla

“Xicheng soulmate AU

An au where your dreams are small snippets of your soulmate’s day. They’d show small things like buying coffee, reading a book, or hanging out with people from their perspective.

The problem was that people always have expectations and Jiang Cheng knows he always falls short of them. Time and time again.“

soulmate au, but being soulmates is more a problem than a solution

misunderstandingssss all over the place

now with a squel (in progress?)

Lan Furen series by jagaimocchi

“Jiang Cheng leaves Lotus Pier before the Wen Internment Camp and before the destruction of his home. When he meets Lan Xichen on the run from the Wens after the burning of Cloud Recesses, his plan to live a peaceful life away from cultivation sects is quickly derailed. Now, free to make his own choices, he cannot find it in himself to leave the other man's side.

With love, patience and time, Jiang Cheng finds his own happiness and peace with his past.“

have you ever wanted a fic where jiang cheng peaces out from home in search for a better life, bc he’s Had Enough??? jags got you covered

adorable xicheng

good uncle-dad-figure Lan Qiren

ongoing <3

Just around the riverbend by JungleJelly

“One day.

Jiang Cheng just wanted one day of peace and quiet, away from home, away from his responsibilities, away from his idiot brother and his nutcases of a mother and father. Just a few hours alone — him and a boat and nothing else.

Clearly, that was too much to ask for.”

now with a new story in the series which is adorable too!!!

mermaid!lxc need i say more?

Bad ideas (where they lead) by JungleJelly

“Jiang Cheng is a busy man. Fortunately, he is also a huge pushover when it comes to his sister, so when she recommends that he start doing yoga, he agrees pretty easily.Featuring Lan Xichen in yoga pants, Jiang Cheng’s inability to handle a crush, and, perhaps most importantly, a big fluffy dog.“

done for 2020 MXTX MiniBang

yoga instructor Lan Xichen

Jiang Cheng is: struggling with a crush on the yoga guy from youtube & very angry about that

If there’s a price for rotten judgement by TheWanderingHeart

“All Jiang Cheng wants to do is, well... his job, really. Other than that? Keep the city safe, keep his nephew alive, keep his sanity intact (if possible).

So when his brother calls with unexpected news, he knows all of that is about to fly out of the window.

***

[Every instinct is telling him don’t ask, you don’t want to know. By this point, Nie HuaiSang has scooted closer to listen. Jiang Cheng takes a steadying breath and pulls out his antacids. “What did you do?”]”

superhero au, come on

jc just trying to do his job in peace

(he can’t)

i love it so much oh my god *sobs*

The Form of Boneless Ice by TheWanderingHeart

“Mythical beasts have long ago been driven to extinction by the gentry — hunted for sport, but more importantly for their magical cores. Since then, there remains only one creature that has never been caught. The Jiang’s retreated a long time ago. Abandoning land altogether, they sought safety where the humans could not reach.It all comes to a head though, purely by chance. (Or is it by fate that a spontaneous decision allows for them to meet? If fate were a rock!) Jiang Cheng suddenly finds his whole life balanced on the head of a pin — on the flimsy promise of a human boy. In his opinion, things cannot possibly get worse!(But then they do when the Wens decide it’s finally time to search for the elusive merpeople, and suddenly nowhere is safe.)“

there she goes again, with another beautiful xicheng story full of awwww and mythology

actually one of the first xicheng fics i read

i chose it because there were mermaids

painfully accurate takes on Jiang family dynamics

kids! lots of kids!

Let me Slytherin to Your Heart by TheWanderingHeart

“Jiang Cheng never thought he'd return to Hogwarts, but in hindsight, he probably should have known that someday he would.With his nephew about to start school, he reluctantly takes his good friend's bad parenting? career? advice and ends up tumbling head-first back into the madness that he hoped he'd left behind... and rediscovering some feelings he thought he'd left behind too.“

Harry Potter au!

just really fecking cute

lots of snakes

[I am not going to link all of Jo’s fics, though I probably could, just my 3 favourites. UOSB is there by default]

Talent Hunt Crew Finds Angry Guy Shouting On College Campus, Recruits Him For Vocal Projection Abilities by oh_fudgecakes

“Jiang Cheng, resident Angry Guy and heir to a conglomerate empire, has never been the apple of his father’s eye. Quashed under the shadow of his brilliant brother, the music prodigy Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng sees his chance to turn things around when he is recruited by the All-Stars Lan Talent Hunt. One problem: he can’t sing to save his goddamn life.As he struggles to develop his nascent singing abilities, Jiang Cheng finds himself sucked into the whirlwind drama of reality TV, helped along by his adoring siblings, his irritable vocal coach Wen Qing, and strangely enough, the unfairly attractive host of the All-Stars Lan Talent Hunt, Lan Xichen. Somewhere in the glare of the stage lights and an unexpected first love, Jiang Cheng stumbles upon the thing he was searching for all along: the courage to dream — and to attempt the impossible.“

done for 2019 MXTX Big Bang

uuuuuuuuuuh i might have cried maybe

heartwarming? painful at times? lots of family love?

slowburn xicheng being lovely

The Provenence of Hope series by velithya

“A chance meeting on a night hunt sets a course of events into motion that will change everything. Featuring Xicheng getting together, recovery for Lan Xichen, healing for Jiang Cheng, and always, always, hope.“

got everything. feels. hope. love. ~~healing~~

A Small Measure of Peace by Sandstone112

“With his brother in seclusion, Lan Xichen finds himself in temporary custody of his nephew with little to no expertise in the child-raising department. Uncertain and alone, Zewu-Jun is willing to do everything to be the person Yuan needs—even if it means inviting Sandu Shengshou to a playdate.“

a loooot of adorable family times with jc and lxc taking care of their nephews

good grandpa lqr!

canon but fixed and less painful

🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋if you wish to avoid scurvy:🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋

Some day I’m gonna make you mine series by locketofyourhair

xicheng getting together through the years

friends with benefits but the real benefits are the friends we made along the way

Take me over (take me tonight) by velithya

jiang cheng has a tattoo and lan xichen doesn’t stand a chance

i'd be the sweet feeling of release (mankind now dreams of) by piyo13

two bros, chilling in a cave, no feet apart because they don’t want to lose their cultivation powers what are you gonna do

haven’t read yet and shame on me, but AM GONNA:

Upon Our Silver Bridge by TheWanderingHeart obviously

““When the path ignites a soul, there's no remaining in place. The foot touches ground, but not for long.” ― Hakim Sanai

**

Lan Xichen's sorrows have caught the attention of something. Unlike the adventures and foes they have faced before, there is no obvious enemy here to defeat. If this is the same thing they thought had taken Nie Mingjue's life, then he believes it is fated for him to die as well. Nothing can stop the black fire when it wants to burn.Jiang Cheng is sure his part in this is over. Wei Wuxian is back, his grand adventure concluded, and he'd never been at the centre of it anyway. So what does it matter what happens to him in the end? Slowly, he will come to realise that there will always be a battle to fight, a story to tell, a choice to make, and there is no such thing as an end to anything.“

it was difficult to do things in 2020 and few i regret not doing more than not reading uosb yet :’(

i will tho

Emergency Help Wanted by piyo13

“EMERGENCY HELP WANTED I lied when I got my job. I told them I had a kid so I could leave early from work to pick him up from daycare, take him to doctor's appointments, and occasionally miss a day when he's sick. Long story short, I'm in too deep. I didn't think it through. Looking to rent a kid for bring your child to work day. Must be a boy ages four to six, longish dark hair, likes soccer. Must also be artistic as the macaroni noodle paintings I made seem a little advanced for his age. Also, I will pay extra for someone willing to play the role of husband when dropping him off. He's a prosecuting attorney who often brings his work home. Message me for further details. Serious inquiries only.“

Running Our Hands Through Embers by MarvelousMar

“If asked, Jiang Cheng would compare falling in love with Lan Xichen to a moth inevitably drawn to a flame.It burned.***In which Jiang Cheng discovers that even death can't help him escape from his trauma, so he embarks on a quest to save the people he loves, fix what he can, make the love of his life fall for him, and maybe, somewhere along the way, do a little bit of healing.”

The Beginner’s Guide to Moving On by InvincibleMel

gone from ao3, but i think there’s a link with a pdf going around

[ibijau]

How to Woo a Lan pt8 / On AO3

Nie Huaisang brings wine and advice

When he had calmed down, Jin Ling wrote to Nie Huaisang. He explained, quite plainly, that he’d been entirely wrong about his assessment of Lan Sizhui’s feelings for him, and that he would no longer come and bother Nie Huaisang about his personal problems. Then, refusing to wallow in misery, Jin Ling had gone back to work.

First, he finished the list of items to be returned to the Ghost General. Even if he’d only started this little project to show his best side to Lan Sizhui, Jin Ling still wanted to see this through, because there was no sense in maintaining old grudges. He also wanted to prove to himself (and perhaps Lan Sizhui as well) that he was a very mature person who was capable of doing the right thing even if there were no advantages to be gained, for no reason other than it being the right thing. 

One could not grow with Jin Guangyao and Jiang Cheng as role models without learning to appreciate the petty joy of acting like the bigger man.

Secondly, Jin Ling then turned to the rest of his normal work, of which there was always plenty. No matter what had happened to Lanling Jin’s reputation among other cultivation sects, for people at large it was still renowned for its wealth and power, and thus received many cries for help every day, many new applicants who wanted to join it. Sometimes it annoyed Jin Ling that these things took so much of his time, but right then it was a real relief to have so much to do, or else he would have wallowed in misery and refused to leave his bed for at least a week.

Then, not four days after this whole debacle went down, Nie Huaisang came to Jinlin Tai.

He did not come in the quiet and solemn way a sect leader would normally visit one of his peers. Instead Nie Huaisang pushed his way past the helpless guards at the gate and made his way inside without anyone being able to stop him, until he’d found Jin Ling’s office where the young man was currently wrangling some bills. Jin Ling was quite shocked by that visit, but Nie Huaisang merely smiled at him, as if it were the most natural thing in the world for him to be there.

“I figured you might need someone to comfort you after that,” Nie Huaisang just said, ignoring panicked servants and closing the office’s door behind himself. “I know I’m not who you’d probably prefer, but I suppose you don’t have many other options. And if there’s one thing I know, it’s the excruciating pain of loving a Lan who won’t return it.”

Jin Ling, for a moment, was too shocked to say anything.

It wasn’t exactly unexpected for Nie Huaisang to come to Jinlin Tai uninvited. In fact, he used to do so quite often, back when Jin Guangyao had been sect leader. Jin Ling couldn’t count the number of times his unfortunate uncle had been working on something, only to be forced to give up on whatever it was that he’d been doing, because Nie Huaisang had barged in demanding that his problems be solved immediately. Jin Ling used to find it irritating, though since he’d started doing the exact same thing to Nie Huaisang in recent months, he had to admit he understood why the older man had done it. There was something immensely fun about being a nuisance.

But Nie Huaisang hadn’t been a nuisance lately, Jin Ling realised. He’d never come uninvited until that day, even though he clearly could have done so quite easily, as he’d just proven. It might have just been that he had nothing to gain from pestering Jin Ling the way he’d pestered Jin Guangyao… but it felt like more than that. Ever since Jin Ling had become sect leader, Nie Huaisang had been surprisingly polite to him whenever they had to meet on official business. Many of the other sect leaders would treat Jin Ling as a child, but Nie Huaisang, who might have had more reasons than most to enjoy tormenting him over his lack of experience, had never done so.

Even this visit didn’t feel like something he was doing to be annoying. Instead he looked sincerely concerned, almost as if Jin Ling were someone he cared about rather than a brat who’d forced him to become involved in his romantic trouble.

Almost as if they were friends, or something of that sort.

“I… wouldn’t mind some company,” Jin Ling confessed, much to his own surprise. “But I’m busy…”

“Oh, that stuff can wait,” Nie Huaisang replied with a dismissive gesture. “I can see you’re embracing your Jiang side here, trying to keep busy to avoid feeling anything, but that’s a very bad strategy. It certainly hasn’t done your uncle any favours. No, what you need is to let it all explode, maybe have a good cry… though I must warn you, I’m a sympathetic crier. I will be sobbing alongside you, maybe worse than you.”

Jin Ling snorted. “You do cry a lot.”

“It’s excellent for the nerves,” Nie Huaisang claimed. “Now come, let’s go somewhere quiet. You’ll order servants to bring us food, and I’ve brought a most exquisite wine… have you ever had Emperor’s Smile? There’s just nothing like it when you’re heartbroken because of a Lan.”

Again, Jin Ling snorted. Nie Huaisang was such a weird grown-up, nothing at all like his uncle who kept advising him against drinking anything, or his Jin elders who constantly told him he needed to control his emotions more.

But maybe a weird grown-up was what Jin Ling needed at that moment, so he agreed to the plan. Some orders were given to servants, and the two of them retired to Jin Ling’s private quarters, where they sat together at a low table while a number of delicacies were brought to them. Nie Huaisang was on his most polite behaviour while the servants were around, then as soon as the last of them closed the door behind herself, he took a jar of wine from inside his sleeve and started pouring some for himself and for Jin Ling.

“A toast, to love and heartbreak,” he said, before promptly emptying his cup.

Jin Ling drank a little more carefully, mostly because he wasn’t used to drinking too much alcohol. Emperor’s Smile was fresh and filled with delicate notes. It was a speciality from Gusu, he remembered, and like everything from that area, there was something almost impossibly perfect about it.

“Have some more,” Nie Huaisang encouraged, filling and drinking another cup for himself. He did not appear to mind that Jin Ling left his own second cup untouched, and just proceeded to drink most of the wine on his own.

“Are we drinking to my bad luck in love, or yours?” Jin Ling couldn’t resist asking when half the jar was gone.

“Oh, yours of course,” Nie Huaisang replied, his cheeks quite red already from having drunk this much, this fast. “I’ve already cried all that I had to cry for myself, and in the end I know what I’m suffering was brought on by my own choices. But you! Ah, you… you poor, stupid child. You could have had anyone, and you had to fall for a Lan. And not even one of the accessible ones. Which some of them are, let me tell you.”

“I can believe that,” Jin Ling retorted, thinking of Lan Jingyi who would probably be far less unreachable than Lan Sizhui, provided one enjoyed loud and rude people who never knew when to shut up. “But he’s perfect. How am I supposed to not love someone this perfect? I don’t understand how it’s possible not everyone is in love with him. He’s so perfect. And it makes sense that he doesn’t love me back. He’s perfect and I’m… not.”

While Nie Huaisang sympathetically nodded to that, Jin Ling felt overwhelmed by all the despairing sadness he’d been pushing down since Lan Sizhui’s rejection. Unsure what else to do he drank some more wine, but that quickly proved a mistake because almost right away Jin Ling started crying.

“I really do love him,” he sniffled. “It’s not fair… I love him and I thought he liked me at least! I really thought he did, I really thought I had a chance. I’m so stupid. How could I think I had a chance?”

“Nothing stupid in that,” Nie Huaisang replied softly, patting Jin Ling’s hand with surprising gentleness. “Plenty of people would be happy to have a chance with you, I think.”

“I don’t want plenty of people. I want Sizhui. And he doesn’t want me. He’s never going to want me. He thinks I’m stupid, and that I’m a kid, and that I’m not even really in love with him.”

Nie Huaisang froze in the middle of patting Jin Ling’s hand. His expression, which the wine had rendered drowsy and soft, suddenly turned sharp again and he straightened his back.

"Wait,” he said, no longer sounding drunk at all. “I need to know something, so I can give you my honest opinion as a Lan expert. What did he say when you told him you love him?" 

"He said I didn't," Jin Ling sniffled.

"Hm. Hmmm. Hm. Did he say anything regarding a preference of his own for women?"

The question was odd enough to startle Jin Ling out of his tears, and forced him to think again about that most terrible day when all his hopes had been so mercilessly crushed.

"No. He just said that I didn't love him either anyway, and he was flattered, and it made him happy that I'd think of him that way, but that we should stop talking for a while because it just couldn’t happen. And then he left."

"Fascinating,” Nie Huaisang exclaimed, suddenly quite excited. “Jin zongzhu, you still have a lot to learn about the Lan mind, I see. Something like that ? That isn't rejection."

"Well, it sure felt like it!" Jin Ling replied, and started crying again.

With more tact than expected, Nie Huaisang nodded, and calmed down again. He even went so far as to pat Jin Ling’s shoulder, giving it a little squeeze in sympathy.

"Yes, I can imagine that. I think it was intended to be taken as a rejection, in fact. But…” Nie Huaisang paused, and drank some more, but more slowly than before, as if trying to truly enjoy the taste of the wine. “You see, the Lans have a rule against lying, and I know for a fact that the innermost part of the Lan clan takes it very seriously. They will try not to lie even if it goes against their interest. And your little friend was raised by Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji, who in their respective ways are both unbending about refusing to tell a lie."

"I don't think I've ever heard Lan zongzhu called unbending by anyone before."

"Because he's very good at that game," Nie Huaisang explained with a proud grin, his cheeks flushing darker as if merely thinking of Lan Xichen still brought him joy. "He's very much like your late uncle in that regard. There's a reason they got along so well. I've seen them avoid entire conversations with immense skill. I've also witnessed Lan Xichen being asked unreasonable things by very unpleasant people and spinning them around until they'd promised to do the unreasonable thing on their own, or given up entirely."

"Were you ever one of those unpleasant people?" 

"Irrelevant," Nie Huaisang said, which meant yes. “My point is, I think your little friend was trying very hard to not lie to you, while also not telling you the whole truth. He didn’t say he doesn’t love you, he said… well, he basically said that he shouldn’t love you, for which I don’t exactly blame him. Not an easy position he’s in. Not easy at all. But I told you that the very first time you came to me for advice, didn’t I?”

“I guess,” Jin Ling sniffled, wiping the wetness on his cheeks with the palm of his hands. “I just don’t get why. I know it’s not ideal that we’re both boys, but I’ll jump through every hoop the sect elders demand, if I can be with him.”

“Cute. Sweet. Very touching. Absolutely irrelevant, though,” Nie Huaisang said, “because the problem really isn’t you, it’s him. There are certain details about Lan Sizhui that mean it would be complicated for him to marry anyone at all.”

“You know something,” Jin Ling accused. “And you’re not telling me.”

Nie Huaisang shrugged, and pulled out his fan. When he opened it, the movement was less elegant than usual, his trembling hand fumbling a little.

“I know many things,” Nie Huaisang replied, looking to the side. “A lot of which I’d be happier not knowing. Most of it, I would share with anyone asking and not worry about it. Ultimately people’s secrets are not my problem, and if they were stupid enough to share it once, I don’t see why I shouldn’t share it twice if it suits my purposes. But this…” He started fanning himself nervously. “I have not often been worthy of Zewu-Jun’s trust. For this, I must try to be. I will not tell you what I know, Jin zongzhu.”

“It’s a bit late to worry about being worthy of him,” Jin Ling muttered, pouring some more wine. “But I guess that’s fair. I’ll just have to figure this out on my own.”

“Hm. Hmmm. I could give you hints,” Nie Huaisang suggested, his fan stilling. “No oath broken in doing that. I’ve already given you hints anyway.”

“You’ve just said it’s a bad idea to be in love with Sizhui. And, and that he’s got a big secret.”

“Very big,” Nie Huaisang agreed. “Huge. Terrible mess when people find out… and in my experience, people always find out. Or maybe they won’t. The Lans are better than most at keeping secrets. But that thing… well. Well. Anyway. You see, Lans are good at secrets. And they’re also good at self-sacrifice. Your little boyfriend, he’s scared of what you’ll say, and he’s scared of what’ll happen to you if you’re associated with him when it all breaks out.”

“I don’t care what happens. I love him and I’ll stand by him!”

“Delightful. Lovely. Ah, to be young and romantic!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed, his eyes shining as if he might cry. “To think nothing can stand in the way of true love! I miss that! Jin Rulan, you are a delight, and I can see why someone like Lan Sizhui might fall in love with you. Sadly, it’s also the exact reason why he’ll do his best to keep you out of his life. How is the poor boy supposed to deal with being loved like that?”

“I don’t understand.”

“It’s scary, letting someone love you,” Nie Huaisang said, getting more serious. “Especially when you carry a secret that could impact the life of others. I know that I… well. Sometimes, when you have a secret, you’d rather let it devour you alive than take the risk of sharing it. After all, to bare your soul to another, to give them the power to destroy you… It takes great courage.”

“And you didn’t do it.”

“I didn’t. I can’t even say I regret it. I couldn’t risk losing Zewu-Jun, I just wasn’t brave enough. But I think you would have that courage, because you're a much better person than I am."

Jin Ling considered that for a moment. The wine was starting to make it a little hard to think, but he was pretty sure that was intended as a compliment, though it might well have been an insult as well.

“Do you think Sizhui will regret it someday if he doesn’t take the risk of trusting me?”

“I think whatever he chooses, he’ll have regrets,” Nie Huaisang said, slowly fanning himself. “In his position, it would be impossible not to have some, because there’s no right choice for him. But I think it’s much easier to deal with regret when you’re in bed with a pretty boy who thinks you’re worth risking the anger of the entire world.”

“Shut up,” Jin Ling grumbled, feeling his cheeks heat up from the wine, but mostly from the thought that maybe someday he could be laying in bed with Lan Sizhui. He barely dared to think about doing more than kissing at normal times, but the wine was getting to him and making it a little too easy for his imagination to go wild. “You’re a horrible old man and a pervert, Nie zongzhu.”

“Can’t deny it. It’s pretty fun, and it lets you get revenge against young boys who come to pester you while you’re trying to be self-pitying and to convince yourself that love isn’t real, only to then remind you that you too used to have a heart. Do I look like I want to have a heart? Do I? A heart is more useless to me than my sabre, and that’s saying something.”

“You’re an idiot,” Jin Ling stated without heat.

“Of course I am,” Nie Huaisang laughed. “Why do you think they call me Headshaker? I am very stupid indeed. And yet here you are, relying on me for advice, so what does that make you?”

Jin Ling stuck out his tongue at the older man, annoyed that he couldn’t find anything clever to reply, then snatched the jar of Emperor’s Smile so he could finish it. Nie Huaisang made a great show of protesting against such a rude action, complaining that the youth of today had no respect for their elders, that he certainly didn’t drink so much when he was that age, and that in fact he still barely drank at all even now. A speech that might have been more effective if he hadn’t at the same time pulled out a second jar of wine, pouring some for both of them while Jin Ling cackled in a most unbecoming manner.

Nie Huaisang was an odd man, but he wasn’t a bad friend to have on a sad day.

[weiying-lanzhan-fics]

some life yet unspent by Fahye

Loved it - the special ops stuff was fun to read, the inherent romance of trusting someone with your life - electrifying! ❤️❤️

Quotes:

"Is it weird? It must be weird. I suppose it always is, working with family members. Jiang Cheng had a welcome card delivered to my apartment on my first day, and inside it said GET YOUR OWN WORKPLACE, ASSHOLE, THIS ONE'S MINE." A fluid, ironic laugh. "Wasn't that nice of him?"

Only the knowledge that on one of his very first missions, ops support had mistakenly thought Lan Wangji had been poisoned or otherwise incapacitated because he made so little sound, forced a noncommittal noise from between Lan Wangji's lips. Mianmian and the others were used to him by now. Wei Wuxian, new, might do something asinine like raise the alarm or yell painfully loud.

"You don't talk much, do you?"

"Mm."

————

It was right there in the stocktaking records, how much care Lan Wangji took of his equipment. Had always taken. Anyone examining his behaviour, in search of a break in the pattern, would find nothing to analyse.

And so it became a perfectly kept secret, how much Lan Wangji looked forward to the moments when Wei Wuxian—rubbing his palms together in showy anticipation—would coo over Lan Wangji's returned inventory as though every single gadget and weapon and piece of fiendishly clever tech was a beloved child of his body.

In a way, most of them were.

————

"I'm so glad you exist, Huaisang," Wei Ying said fervently. "I would have told his car to drive him off a cliff. He's so nervy and loud when things go wrong."

"I like it. You always know exactly what's happening," said Nie Huaisang. "I don't know how you can prefer agents who barely tell you anything even when they've been shot."

"Mn," said Lan Wangji, behind him, and Nie Huaisang nearly leapt out of his chair.

E, 28k

Summary:

Lan Wangji wasn't privy to the conversations that took place among Yiling staff, but there was always an apologetic, tense edge to the tech's voice when someone else took over his missions. As if Wei Ying had put the fear of God into them if they let anything happen to Lan Wangji when Wei Ying was not personally available to oversee him.

"Something like that," Mianmian told him. "Anyway, it's not like there's anything for either of you to be jealous over. None of the other agents prefer him."

@fahye

[gffa]

There was this viral tweet that went around about THE UNTAMED awhile back that was basically the cycle of every fan of the series that I have ever met: 1. Wtf, THIS is the show everyone is losing their minds over? This isn’t even good! 2. Well, I guess it’s not that bad, it’s pretty watchable and fun, it’s all right. 3. I would now die for these characters. So, when I swore this drama wasn’t going to be a big fandom for me, I was just going to watch the show and then fuck off again, I should have known better. Because here I am, crying about feelings about the entire cast and devouring fic and yelling at anyone who will spend even five minutes listening to me about how much I love the OTP, how much I love the Yunmeng Siblings and their Terrible Communications Issues, and the Tragic Sibling Duos and the Tragic Doomed Loves and The Cutest Juniors In The World and how I want to lock ALL OF THEM IN A ROOM until they sort out their feelings! THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - EMOTIONAL CONSTIPATION RUNS IN THE FAMILY - YUNMENG SIBLINGS FIC: ✦ Still in the Water by airgeer, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin ling & lan sizhui & jiang cheng, 45k    A year after Jin Ling’s early succession to the position of Sect Leader, a letter is delivered to him under strange circumstances. A night-hunt follows. ✦ no one lights a candle to remember by asravine, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jiang yanli (& wangxian), 7.9k    “Didi,” Wei Wuxian says softly. His thumb on Jiang Cheng’s cheek is calloused and warm and burns of affection. Jiang Cheng barely stops himself from leaning in. “Didi, don’t cry because of me.” ✦ can people untie themselves, uncurling like flowers by annemari, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji, 19.3k    Wei Wuxian gets hurt on a night hunt. Jiang Cheng is displeased to find out that he’s been wandering around on his own instead of living with Lan Wangji in Cloud Recesses. He ends up fixing it. ✦ bark, bite by chashmish, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & lan wangji & jin ling (& wangxian), modern au, 3.4k    Jin Ling finds a dog and learns some new things about his uncles. ✦ before you stumble by ribena, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui (& wangxian), 9.8k    “Uncle,” Jin Ling says. “Just because Uncle Wei - I mean, Wei Wuxian - just because he’s leading the night-hunt, he’s teaching, he’s not doing anything wrong, he even notified you ahead of time -” ✦ Five Dogs, One Cat by ryfkah, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi & nie huaisang, 13.4k    If you’ve ever believed me in anything, believe I want what’s best for Jin Ling, the first line of the letter reads. Jiang Cheng has to stop and take a moment before he continues on to the next line: You must come to Carp Tower as soon as you can and lavish praise on the ugliest dog I’ve ever seen. ✦ Life is Very Long by Vamillepudding, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi (& wangxian), 12.7k    Wei Wuxian is a good for nothing, possibly evil, possibly fake uncle. But he’s Jin Ling’s good for nothing, possibly evil, possibly fake uncle. So it stands to reason that when Jin Ling starts to suspect that Hanguang-jun is mistreating his husband, he immediately recruits Jiang Cheng for a rescue mission. ✦ a symbol to remind you that there’s more to see by paperminds, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui & lan jingyi & ouyang zizhen, 9.7k    For as long as Jin Ling can remember, he has been immune to the majority of supernatural hauntings that plague the cultivation world. Or: what if Jin Ling had received his first-month birthday gift. ✦ plea from a cat named little plum blossom by rolameny, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling, 5.1k    Jiang Cheng is trying. Jiang Cheng is having a very trying day. At least the cat likes him. ✦ JC and WWX’s Get Along Sweater by newamsterdam, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan wangji & lan sizhui (& wangxian), 29.6k    Convinced Jiang Cheng and Wei WuXian will never reconcile of their own accord, Jin Ling takes matters into his own hands by trapping both of his uncles alone, together, without their cultivation. ✦ passed down like folksongs, our love lasts so long by finedae, wei wuxian & jiang cheng (& background wangxian), 6k    winning a drinking contest, wei wuxian finds out yunmeng has got new folklore since he’s been gone. those are the stories of the Twin Prides of Yunmeng. naturally, he has to go confront jiang cheng for doing the opposite of talking shit about the dead; this is a confession of love. ✦ sorrow waited by curiositykilled, wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 2.3k    No one gets out of the Burial Mounds alive and so Wei Wuxian cannot have been in the Burial Mounds — but sometimes Jiang Cheng starts to think it might be the inverse instead. No one gets out of the Burial Mounds alive and so Wei Wuxian didn’t get out at all. Someone, something, else crawled out. ✦ the trick is to keep breathing by alessandriana, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling, 3.4k    Jiang Cheng probably should have anticipated the assassination attempt. He’d spent the last three weeks in Lanling browbeating the more intractable elders into supporting Jin Ling before his nephew’s first discussion conference, and he hadn’t exactly been kind about it. Still, he was a cultivator– if someone was going to try and kill him, he expected swords, or curses. Not poison in his tea. ✦ the road in leaves no step had trodden black by Skadiseven, wei wuxian & jiang cheng & wen ning & wen qing, 1.6k    Jiang Cheng gets a little therapy session from Wen Ning, learns to plant potatoes, and decides he’s not giving up on something he wants. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - JUST STRAIGHT UP WANGXIAN OTP FIC: ✦ Fire in the Blood by Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle), lan wangji/wei wuxian, nsfw, 20.7k    Wei Ying is traveling, and he gets busy. Lan Wangji knows that sometimes, Wei Ying forgets things. ✦ scapegoat by astrobandit, lan wangji/wei wuxian, 1.3k    Four ridiculous things the Yiling Patriarch was blamed for, and one ridiculous thing that was positively his fault. ✦ Content Warning: Romance by Ariaste, lan wangji/wei wuxian, nsfw, 5.9k    Wei Wuxian just wants a little warning before Lan Wangji says nice things. Lan Wangji just wants to love on his husband, thanks. ✦ Where the Lonely Ones Go by CSHfic, VSfic, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & cast, 23.9k    Accidental (haunted) baby acquisition ✦ devotee by tagteamme, lan wangji/wei wuxian, NSFW, 5.8k    Lan Wangji does not control Wei Wuxian. Not in the way many wish he would. But like this— ✦ nothing gold can stay by rikke, lan wangji/wei wuxian & cast, nsfw, 10.3k    Before Wen Chao can throw him into Yiling Burial Mounds, Lan Wangji finds Wei Wuxian. ✦ Wait, What? by MarbleGlove, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan xichen, time travel, 1.5k    AKA, that time sixteen-year-old Wei WuXian showed up at Cloud Recesses, took one look at Lan WangJi and declared, “That’s my future husband!” … and Lan WangJi said, “Mm” ✦ Beyond All Reach by airinshaw, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & nie huaisang & lan xichen, NSFW, 27.4k    Wei Wuxian heads back to Cloud Recesses to find out more about a curse someone has placed on him, that appears to do nothing. Until he meets back up with Lan Wangji and finds out that what the curse really does is stop them from being able to touch. ✦ Key Differences by pupeez4eva, lan wangji/wei wuxian & cast, 5.6k    Wherein Wei Wuxian ends up meeting an alternate version of himself who, much to his horror, never married Lan Wangji. Obviously he has to do something to fix this. ✦ the heart is hard to translate by vespertineflora, lan wangji/wei wuxian, NSFW, rough sex, non-con play, 10.8k    The moment comes almost out of the blue when, one relaxed spring afternoon, Lan Wangji decides that he’s ready to offer Wei Wuxian an opportunity to play out that very delicious fantasy about their stolen first kiss. ✦ Pigtail Pulling by protos_metazu_ison, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & nie huaisang & lan xichen, 3.7k    Wei Wuxian trips over Jiang Wanyin and sends both of them to the ground in a tangle of limbs and bruises. ✦ The Last Three Feet by etymologyplayground, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan sizhui & lan wangji, 3.7k    A moment of down time in the Cloud Recesses. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - SOMETIMES YUNMENG SIBLINGS FIC, SOMETIMES WANGXIAN FIC: ✦ put your heart where your mouth is by protos_metazu_ison, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 19.9k    Having lost a month’s worth of memories might have been fine if Wei Wuxian hadn’t managed to forget the part where he and Lan Wangji got engaged. If that was, actually, what happened. He hasn’t figured out that part yet. ✦ Orchids in Lotus Pier by Vamillepudding, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & lan xichen & jiang yanli & jin zixuan & cast, 21.6k    Against all odds, Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng become friends. It’s just Jiang Cheng’s luck that people think they’re courting. And it’s just Lan Wangji’s luck that regretfully, Wei Wuxian is also People. ✦ Deeper grows my longing by feyburner, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 4.4k    Jiang Cheng stared at him. “How are you this dense,” he said flatly. “Wei Wuxian. The common people aren’t scared of you, they’re scared of your husband.“ “My what,” said Wei Wuxian. ✦ A Civil Combpaign by Ariaste, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin ling/lan sizhui & cast, 31k    “And,” said one of the pompous ministers, “there’s the matter of a marriage to consider as well!” Jin Ling, who at the beginning of that sentence had expected to slam into the very last wall of his patience and lose his temper entirely, paused. “A what?” ✦ Being Known by dragongirlG, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jin zixuan/jiang yanli & jiang cheng/wen qing & nie huaisang & wen ning & lan xichen & yu ziyuan & lan qiren & cast, 36.3k wip    Teenage Lan Wangji drunkenly confesses his lust for Wei Wuxian during the guest disciple lectures at the Cloud Recesses and wakes up betrothed to him by way of forehead ribbon. It all goes from there. ✦ heaven and earth as witness by scheherazade, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & jin ling & lan sizhui, 8.5k    Jin Ling has an emotional meltdown involving Lan Sizhui. Lan Wangji predictably overreacts. Somehow, it helps Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian finally have a conversation that they should have had years ago. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - SOMETIMES CASE FIC, SOMETIMES WANGXIAN FIC: ✦ grow by cafecliche, lan wangji/wei wuxian & lan sizhui & the juniors, case fic, de-aged, 14.4k    Or: Wei Wuxian is cursed on a night-hunt, and the junior quartet rapidly finds themselves in over their heads. ✦ Linger in the Sun by etymologyplayground, lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng & ocs & cast, 39.4k    Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji find themselves cursed, unable to see or hear each other. They figure things out anyway. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - WHEN I WASN’T LOOKING, I DEVELOPED NIE BROTHERS FEELINGS FIC: ✦ Pushover by nirejseki, nie huaisang & nie mingjue & lan xichen & jin guangyao & cast, 1.9k    Every once in a while, not often, people who know them well will say that Nie Mingjue lets Nie Huaisang walk all over him. That isn’t quite right. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - YOUR HONOR, HAVE YOU SEENA-YAO’S PRECIOUS FACE? - LAN XICHEN/JIN GUANGYAO FIC: ✦ half cloak & half dagger by Fahye, lan xichen/jin guangyao (& background wangxian), NSFW, 13.1k    Jin Guangyao lifts his head and smiles. "I’m considering a problem.” “Can I be of any assistance with it?” He drops a kiss on Lan Xichen’s chest. With the nail of one finger he lightly traces the characters for irony on Lan Xichen’s side. “Not this one, er-ge.” ✦ Hindsight by clockwork_spider, lan xichen/jin guangyao, ~1k    Three years after the incident at the GuanYin temple, Jin GuangYao and Nie MingJue’s coffin was unsealed and their corpses, depleted of resentful energy, were finally laid to rest, their spirits released. In his dream, Lan XiChen is visited by the spectre of his sworn brother. ✦ beyond reasons by welcome_equivocator, lan xichen/jin guangyao & lan wangji, 5.2k    “a-yao,” he says, and you are almost surprised to hear it, but he is still facing away from you, “i know about the music.” ✦ Spring Dawn 《 花落知多少 》 by iskendaris, lan xichen/jin guangyao & nie mingjue, modern au/reincarnation au, 4.5k    Meng Yao is given a second chance when he’s reincarnated. He doesn’t want a repeat of the past. However destiny has a way of interfering, and he finds himself working together with student president Lan Xichen?! Really, what is this fate?! ✦ Hold the Baby by Moonsheen, lan xichen/jin guangyao & jin zixuan/jiang yanli & lan wangji/wei wuxian & jiang cheng, 6.4k    A collection of shorts: In which a chance encounter and a fussing baby causes a slight change to Jin Guangyao’s MO. ✦ Ornament by syriala, lan xichen/jin guangyao & nie mingue & lan qiren, 1.6k    He starts to go into the bow again, and Lan Xichen intercepts his movement, stops him from bowing in a move that he might have learned from Nie Mingjue, and then his brain must short-circuit, because the only thought Lan Xichen has is that Meng Yao has the perfect height for forehead kisses. THE UNTAMED/MO DAO ZU SHI RECS - EVERY OTHER KIND OF FIC: ✦ fierce corpse Jin Zixuan by EHyde, jin zixuan/jiang yanli & jin ling & cast, 10.6k    Jin Zixuan died at Qiongqi Path. Then, Wei Wuxian brought him back. But what place does Koi Tower have for a fierce corpse? ✦ The Past Didn’t Go Anywhere by FairestCat, jiang cheng & wen qing & lan sizhui, 2.3k    There are rumours going around of a woman – a healer – travelling the countryside alone. Jiang Cheng needs to know if the rumours are true. ✦ If you only knew then (the things I only know now) by Nillegible, jiang fengmian/yu ziyuan & wei wuxian & jiang cheng & nie huaisang & lan wangji & & lan xichen & jin zixuan & cast, time travel (of a sort), 34.7k wip    Yu Ziyuan receives a warning, a letter in Jiang Cheng’s handwriting, familiar, though it seems to have evened out over long years of practice. This was from her child, but not. This Jiang Cheng, grown up in ways that it hurt to contemplate, had endured the death of his family, his Sect, and his soul. ✦ partly frozen, partly flowing by astrolesbian, lan wangji & lan xichen & lan qiren (& background wangxian), 4.9k    To discourage Lan Wangji from this idea would be to discourage him from loving, and Lan Xichen has always known that to be impossible. All he could do was nod as his brother looked at him, and finished, calmly, “Zewu-jun, I accept any punishment you see fit.” ✦ Delight in Misery by nirejseki, lan wangji & jiang cheng & lan sizhui & jin ling & lan xichen (&background wangxian), 17.4k wip    For the first time in his life, Lan Wangji didn’t want to go home. (what if he had another option?) ✦ into the light of a dark black night by dragongirlG, lan wangji & lan xichen & madam lan, 3k    On a snowy night in the dead of winter, Wu Yuhua, formerly known as Madam Lan, unexpectedly spends one last night with her sons before escaping from the Cloud Recesses. FULL DETAILS + RECS HERE

[demonictales]

May I ask for headcanons with Wei ying, Jiang Cheng and Nie huiashang (if I spelled that right). Where reader was their one of their best friend and a Wen, but soon disappeared when the Wen clan started to take over the other sects. Boys then finding their friend, disabled from their golden core and imprisoned in a remote place where no one could have found them, because they rebelled against the clan leader. Could be more angsty if they lost their hearing or sight, because they were tortured.

oh, i’m excited how this one will turn out. here we go! my heart while writing this went →↑→↑←↑↓↑→↑←↓ also I know you said imprisioned but i got kinda carried away writing this. I'm so sorry okijd

TW: TORTURE, BLINDNESS

GUSU LAN CLAN LECTURES

First of all you were Wen Chao's cousin, unfortunately. However, you pretty much did as you wanted to because who could really control you, so of course you went along to the Lan Clan's lectures alongside Wen Qing and Wen Ning.

Of course you arrived in old fashioned Wen manner and interrupted the ceremony already breaking rules at the entrance. When no one else but Wei Wuxian spoke up. It did indeed amuse you the way he spoke up agains Wen Chao so you carefully watched him.

Excused for the day all three of you eventually went their own way. You had no idea what Wen Qing was up to or Wen Ning, so you eventually walked around the clan, exploring your new home for the few lectures to come. Eventually, in the back hill you bumped into Wei Wuxian who thought Wen Ning to use bow and arrow until that nearly backfired when Wen Qing's voice rang through the air.

"Let's say we are even now that you nearly killed Lady Wen. ---" You were joking obviously, but refering to the earlier incident.

He wasn't quite sure how to deal with you yet but it seemed you made quite the point. Eventually you walked along with him, leaving Wen Ning and Qing to their own.

Meeting Jiang Cheng once more you, indeed did apologize for interrupting his greetings earlier that day. You were quite different than most in the Wen Clan, you did apologize and show manners, though you weren't completely innocent.

As much as you did enjoy art and classics, you were also a little troublemaker, It was a healthy combination of mischief and manners that allowed you to walk the grey zone. So of course you soon bonded with Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng and Nie Huiasang.

You became great friends soon. You learned about Wei Wuxian's mischief, enjoyed his stories of bickering with Lan Zhan, came to know Nie Huiasang's grand taste and love for art and other not so lady like things, as well as his dislike for fighting and of course Jiang Cheng, he was rather complicated but you still enjoyed his presence. You could never quite tell what was on his mind but you knew for sure he deeply cared for his family. He was in fact, someone who seemed to long for his own little happy ending.

Meeting up in secret for a drinking which was strictly forbidden, you had lots of fun until the next morning when you were called for punishment. Even though you were a Wen, you could simply walk away but decided to stay and take the 50 hits. You had made friends for a lifetime during the lectures.

WEN CLAN LECTURES

You'd lie if you say you weren't excited to see your friends again, however, it weren't the best circumstances. You greatly disliked the way it had processed to far yet there they stood, all clans: Nie Clan, Jin Clan, Jiang Clang and eventually Hanguang Jun.

This wasn't much of a lecture, more of Wen Chao showing of his power due to the enormous power the Quishan Wen Clan had gathered. You weren't sure if you were embarrassed or disgusted by your cousin but either way, knowing Wei Wuxian's character you soon had something to laugh. And you were right.

Wen Chao made him recite the Wen Clan rules which ironicially, he didn't even know himself so you nearly busted a lung and earned an angry side eye from your cousin when Wei Wuxian recited the Lan Clan rules.

Of course this would not go without punishment, not for you not for Wei Wuxian and co.

Eventually you helped with the dung being spread, being trapped between Jin Zixuan, Wei Wuxian and Lan Zhan. Fun times. Once more, you apologizes for his behaviour knowing your words could do nothing. The only thing this gave you was the title of Gentle Wen. An embarrassment to your family but in the cultivation world between your friends quite the praise.

You tried getting their swords back but with no luck. You only ended up being grounded in your own room with guards outside.

You weren't able to help your friends out and it did annoy you. It seemed as if you tried harder the more complicated it would get for you to get out of here. It did drive you insane.

When every visitor was suppossed to hunt the monster that roamed through the mountain you once again were by their side, refusing to speak nor act according to your cousin's order.

Which led to quite the argument between you, who stood on your friends side, and Wen Chao and his woman, who for the love of cultivation, wondered where she came from

Either way, you stood between him and Wang Lingjiao when she had ordered to use Mianmian as a sacrifice. You at this point who would believe you, matter of fact, you knew that he was just being abusive. Safe to say it did piss your cousin off and ended up in a fight, eventually were Wei Wuxian would get hurt.

Just like the rest, you got stuck in the cave alongside the rest of the cultivators. Proofing your loyalty to your friends once more. Not so much to the other clans.

This time you helped out Huaisang the most. The poor guy was frightened to death. He was such a soft boy. You felt bad about it and apologzied multiple times while staying by his side, doing your best to help him through the situation. At this point, if you were no traitor to the Wen Clan what else could you possibly be?

You followed Jiang Cheng's introductions to leave the cave through the water, Nie Huaisang by your side.

After all you had made it out word spread proufoundly about you and the Wen Clan. Some said you were a spy, working for the Wen Clan and earning sympathy, others said you were honest about your intentions, later was some encouring words by Nie Huaisang. You truly did appreciate his words.

The moment you stepped foot into Qishan, you were confined to you room until they needed you. They made use of your connections to Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang whenever they needed to. Tricky but smart.

WEN CHAOS HAVOC + SUNHOT CAMPAIGN

It was only when you dumb cousin started to wreak havoc among the clans that you started to see the situation clearly and did not want to have anything to do with it. After cloud recesse had been burned to nearly ashes you spoke up, you were against it. Precious memories were made there and now they had became ashes, quite literally.

If you had known about all the scheming you'd have told Lan Xichen right away, made sure nothing would happen to the Gusu Lan Clan. But being confined barely gave you any choices until one day you fought your way out, meeting your uncle, confronting him about it.

You knew that the Wen Clan was better than that, but the yin iron had taken up to much of his sanity, he instructed Wen Chao to take care of you.

Of course it pained you to see all the chaos and blood being she'd of cour once former friends familie's. There did not a day go by where you begged him to stop. You even tried going against him, but failed miserably.

Wang Lingjiao enjoyed her given power, using it to destroy every piece of hope you still had. Even bringing you along to Lotus Pier to watch the massacre of your closest friends parents.

Daily torture was on your agenda. Being wipped, being burned, being starved or simply kicked and punched by her minions. But you were to prideful to give in just so easily, especially when you head news of Jiang Cheng being captured.

Again, you tried your best to stop him but Wen Chao had enough of your antic and ordered Wen Zuhliu to end it but his woman had a better idea. Get rid of her golden core and blind her. It was her revenge for you spitting the hot soup right into her face, eventually burning her slightly. It was worth it.

You were left in pain, after you felt the power leave your body, the spiritual power who kept healing you in a very slow pace if you needed it but eventually had lost it. The worst was losing your sight, the light of day, not knowing if it was day or night, not being able to navigate on your own.

Treason, that was the reason. You could have had so much more if it wasn't for your weak heart. The words were spoken as hot iron was pushed into your eyes. Your screams were hunting the people who were present. Yet you had lost all of hope and strength in one night, being dumped somewhere on a mountain with nothing but the purpose to die.

After the sunshot campaign people had wondered what happened to you as you were nowhere to be found, yet they all agreed to not search and leave things as they were, the Qishan Wen Clan was extinguished.

PASSING YEARS

Years had passed and you had managed to get yourself back on your feet, even if it wasn't as safe anymore. You learned to live with your blindness.

Deep in the forest in an abandoned little hut. It was perfect for you. You secluded yourself from the world, living in peace. You remembered some tricks your old friend Wei Wuxian had once taught you, and even though your golden core was gone, little tricks like these did do. Obviously you had to renew them every now and then but it was no bother at all.

What you did not know was that the mountain, or rather the forest you lived in belonged to a clan, and possible night hunt had given up your days of silence and years being secluded.

Only when you heard footsteps that did not belong to anything on your small land, you ended up hiding in your small hut, a knife held firmly in your hands.

The voices you could make out seemed familiar but you stayed quiet, perhaps they'd leave.

Of course they did not leave and soon it seemed, three people were standing in your small front yard where chicken where quietly eating and living.

They surely were surprised that someone had managed to live on the mountain of the Jin Clan largest property. That did put you quite in panic. You knew they were your death sentence if they would find you, so you tried to sneak away, but of course Wei Wuxian was one step ahead of you.

" Where do you think you're going ?"

" Wei Wuxian? "

Your voice was hesitant yet filled with surprise but you could definitely make out his voice between a hundred people. A smile almost creeped upon your lips, soley depending on your hearing.

Your attire was still very much simple. A very out worn red hanfu, the logos of the Wen Clan faded but still slightly visible. It was Nie Huaisang that pointed this out. Of course he would notice such details, so he still was alive and breathing. You were deligthed to know this.

However, it was Jiang Cheng who put 1 and 1 together.

" Lady Y/N ? ---"

Silence filled by gasp of Nie Huaisang, as you nodded quietly.

"Guilty."

You were not sure how to feel, happy that you finally met the people you once called friends or scared knowing it could now mean your death.

"I'm glad to hear you are all still well. How have you been all these years? -----"

They would have expected anything but not to meet you. It were raw and mixed feelings. You know you owed Jiang Cheng your live for your family had taken his. You dared not to move your head his way and kept it strictly on the ground.

It was also Wei Wuxians family but it wasn't as deeply rooted.

Nie Huaisang was the first one to approach you, carefully. Asking what had happened to you. So until late night, you told them what happened to you, what your clan did to you, how you ended up here.

You also apologized again, falling to your knees, knowing you could not make up for the loses they had suffered. You started crying, begging for forgiveness.

They explained what had happened on their side, and also admitting they hoped they had not lost you but eventually gave up. You on the other hand did not blame them.

It was a bittersweet reunion after years of forming friendship, betrayal and chaos. Feeling pain and rejoycing again.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 01

(Masterpost) (Next Episode)

Warning: This is **FULL **of spoilers, not just for this episode but for the entire series. If you haven’t finished all 50 episodes, please don’t read it! 

Intro: 2020 continues to be much much too much while also being incredibly boring, and Im done with Shen Wei’s Lewks, so now I’m doing a deep meta dive into the Untamed. Let’s roll! 

Prologue: The Battle of Mordor

The Demise of our Protagonist

Unlike some other shows I won’t name, The Untamed kills its suicidal queer protagonist immediately, rather than waiting four seasons, so we know what we're in for. 

This is Wei Wuxian, who is about to yeet himself off of a cliff. He is having a bad day. 

Note: if mouth blood bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

Reasons for mouth blood: a sampler

Anyway...cliff time

Note: if (fictional) suicide bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

To be fair there are hardly any suicides in The Untamed. No more than ...five? As long as you don’t count the entire population of the Wen Corporate Headquarters in Yiling or those wall bandits in Qinghe or Madame Yu or all those Wens who supposedly threw themselves into the mud puddle or that Mo guy who broke his own neck. Plus watching Wei Wuxian’s cliff drop several more times from multiple angles. So, you know. Hardly Any Suicides. 

This is Lan Wangji, who is about to have his first losing encounter with physics. He is having a bad day.

In fact, if it is possible to have a worse day than the guy who is currently falling to his death, Lan Wangji is having that.

This is Jiang Cheng, who is feeling extra stabby from this camera angle. He is having a bad day.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me? 

(Much, much more after the cut!)

The Amulet Situation

This is the Stygian Tiger Amulet. Yes, by all means, (Netflix) subtitles, let's use a 12-dollar word, “Stygian,” that every English speaker who is not a Shelley/Byron shipper will have to look up. Let’s not use a normal word like "deathly" or "corrupt" or you know... "Yin" which is clearly what they are saying on screen.

Why does this tiger amulet look like a chameleon crossed with a remora? Wei Wuxian can paint photorealistic bunnies on a flimsy lantern while sitting in a field having distracting teenage lust, but two months of meditating with super magic gets him a tiger that looks like a chameleon. And don’t try telling me this is a traditional-Chinese-art vibe because this jade tiger from frickin 1000 BCE is way more tigerish than Wei Wuxian’s attempt. 

Try harder next time, Wei Wuxian.

This is thousands of cultivators having a battle.  What do you mean, it looks like about 40-60 dudes?

 Any time someone in The Untamed refers to a number of people, it is like when you do your high school play and look off into the wings at nothing and say “Hark, A Ship Approaches!” and everyone’s parents nod indulgently.

Jin Clan Mountain Hunt:

*viewership nods indulgently*

This is Captain Blowhard, over on the right, courtesy name Clan Leader Yao. His job is to talk smack about Wei Wuxian and stick up for whoever is the biggest asshole in any given scene.  

He represents mainstream cultivation-world values so here he is shanking one of his allies to take the deadly amulet of evilness.

The Present Day

Spilling All That Yiling Laozu Tea

Down at the Exposition Tea Shop, the Lan juniors are chilling and listening to Tea Dude tell the story of Yiling Laozu. 

How did they get permission to take this field trip? “Principal Qiran, we want to go downtown to hang out with the local rabble and learn about your favorite person, Wei Wuxian.”

Waiting in the wings is the man with a fan and a plan, Nie Huaisan(g), who is paying tall loot to get these stories told.  

...Why? Is Mo Xuanyu having tea here and listening? Or is Wei Wuxian being summoned back by hearing all this smack being talked about him? *Shrug.*

Gank Your Soul

Drunk flag guy out here talking about spirits. Wikipedia tells me that In one school of Daoist thought, a human being has a collection of physical souls (魄 pò) and ethereal souls (魂 hún). Drunk flag guy is saying “hún ” at the moment. 

The many types of souls don’t translate well into English, where spiritual vocabulary has always been shackled connected to Christian beliefs, and is too limited for this context. So when the subtitles have conversations like “Is it a soul eater? No, no, it’s a spirit taker!” just roll with it. (Speaking of hún, if you have any interest in linguistics, do yourself a favor and go read all the wonderful meta @hunxi-guilai​)

The spirit-carrying flag looks a lot like Raava and Vaatu from Korra which...probably doesn’t mean anything.

The Demise of our Trill Host

Suicide #2 happens about 8 minutes in. 

Mo Xuanyu is that hippie roommate with the annoying wind chimes and bead curtains and blood spatter.

He is super mad at his terrible family and also at Jin Guangyao, who sent him home to his terrible family. I wonder if Fan Man Nie Huaisang influenced Jiggy’s decision-making there. Mo Xuanyu’s choice to die for revenge might be excessive, given how easy it actually is to murder the Mo family.

Being Alive Is Fine I Guess As Long As I Get To Fuck WIth People

Wei Wuxian starts his new life by splashing a little water on his face, which instantly makes his hair go from this

to this. 

He looks at his reflection and wishes he was dead, which--mood--but he gets over it as soon as he finds someone whose day he can fuck up.

And he is ALL in on being crazy. 

OP wishes she had the Wei Wuxian kind of crazy instead of the kind she actually has. 

Meanwhile, this is the sane Mo cousin:

This asshole is wearing one of the best fabrics in the whole show, incidentally. Asshole.

My favorite bit of Wei-Mo craziness is when Wei Wuxian does a meaningless 360 all the way around this dude before ducking in the opposite direction, which is like when I make 4 right turns around a whole block to avoid making a single left across traffic.

Perhaps I Do Miss One Thing In This Life

Wei Wuxian has pining thoughts about Lan Wangji, so he plays WangXian on a fucking blade of grass well enough for Sizhui to recognize it from his dad's guqin jams. 

Wei Wuxian is a better flautist than even Inspector Gadget BeatBoxing Flute Guy (Google it).

Our Many Many Spirit Lure Flags have Lured A Spirit, Oh Shit

Lan Clan has a Plan and Wei Wuxian is a Fan

Having one single lure flag stuck in Wen Ning’s torso caused spirits to basically eat him alive, so to catch one evil spirit, 6 disciples holding flags on the roof plus 8 more flags on the ground seems like a good amount. Wei Wuxian is like “yep, a single one of these will lure every spirit for five miles, carry on, younglings.”

Baxia Does the Heavy Lifting

Wei Wuxian is supposed to kill four people because of this curse situation, and in the course of the series they all die, and he kills exactly zero of them. The curse on Wei Wuxian’s arm should be called the scorekeeper curse. 

Baxia’s spirit pinballs around the Mo clan, rapidly killing three people on Mo Xuanyu’s list plus a couple extras for good measure.  Who's a good blade? Baxia is! Yess you are! Yes you are!

This here is the exact point in the show where your friend, who has listened to you squee about The Untamed for three months and finally agreed to watch it with you, will say “what the fuck am I watching?” and try to get up off the couch. Tackle them! 

This also the point where we all realize that the prosthetic and practical effects in this show were probably not made by the people who made the clothing, because the quality is...variable. The white eyeballs are pretty good, but the glove of death is ridiculous.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me?

While Baxia goes to town on the Mo clan, the Lan Clan babies...watch? And tie up the various victims after they are already goners. 

Narrator: Her son is dead.

Meanwhile, 

Wei Wuxian, you motherfucker. You’ve been alive for like 7 hours and you’re already building a new zombie army. No wonder you don’t want them to call Lan Wangji.

Hanguang-Jun Cut It Up One Time

Lan Wangji shows up and very slowly kicks zombie ass with his guqin. If you are used to Hong Kong action speeds, you will find The Untamed very peaceful.

 All of the baby Lans fan squee up at Lan Wangji like he's the cultivation world's David Bowie and...they're not wrong. Jesus Fuck, he’s charismatic.

Lan Wangji is soft boi when he discovers this murderous sword full of dead-bastard energy, because it reminds him of his true love.

Like the talk about souls, the conversations about the nature of the murderous entity really don’t survive translation into English.

Servant: it’s a ghost! 

WWX: it’s not a ghost, it’s a spirit

Babies: It’s a spirit

LWJ: it’s not a spirit, it’s a [...] ghost

Our Protagonist gets the FOH

Wei Wuxian is soft boi when he sees Lan Wangji, but not so soft that he considers actually, like, sticking around. 

Wei Wuxian is also clueless boi, noting Lan Wangji’s white clothing and thinking, as in the past, that he looks like he’s dressed in mourning. The term he uses is 戴孝, which google tells me means the type of outfit worn by Jiang Yanli after Wen Ning rips her husband’s heart out someone who is in mourning. 

Actually, Wei Wuxian, you dumbass, he is in actual mourning, actually, for you. Dumbass. He probably packed away all of his blue outer robes 16 years ago and only takes them out occasionally to reminisce about that nice date you had on your mountain of corpses. 

On his way out the door Wei Wuxian manages to find a red ribbon for his beautiful hair, so things are looking up. 

Where to go next...hey I know, how about that one haunted mountain with the killer statue, you know, the one that all my executed friends and child came from? That’ll be fun and a great way to put the past behind me!

Episode 02 Restless Rewatch is here!

[sincerelystranger]

Omg!! I love your new piece, it depicts grief more realistically. Lwj of course cannot be the same and happily forgets 13 years of grief. I can’t wait to read the finished piece. And if your muse strikes, please write a fluffy, funny modern au piece of wangxian to see how lwj’s love changes or deepens or evolves without grief.

Thank you so much, and I’m sorry it took me forever to answer this! First, I want to preface this by saying that I don’t think that there is wangxian for me without grief. I think grief played a pivotal role in LWJ’s feelings towards WWX and if he hadn’t experienced true loss, he probably would have been content to be WWX’s best buddy for the rest of his life lol

That being said, I did write something stupid because I thought it seemed like a good idea in my dream: 

--

Wangji isn’t eavesdropping. 

He isn’t.

His stupid classmates are just talking loudly. He can’t help but to hear them.

He can’t.

A small crowd of boys are gathered around Wei Ying’s desk - because Wei Ying is bright and fun and popular - and Wangji is sitting alone, revising his notes and definitely not paying attention to their conversation, because he doesn’t care. 

He doesn’t. 

“I heard Nie Huaisang from class 2A is gay,” one of the boys says. The other boys around him snicker and elbow each other. 

“You think that’s true?” one of them asks, he shivers dramatically, “I guess I should steer clear of him.” 

The boys all laugh, and Wangji sneaks a peak behind him to see if Wei Ying is laughing as well. He’s relieved to find that he’s not. Wei Ying looks bored, his face in his hands, staring blankly out the window. 

Wangji is relieved that Wei Ying isn’t laughing and he doesn’t know why. But he is. Relieved. 

“The Nie’s are freaking rich though,” another boy says, “I’d totally do him if he let me drive one of his cars - did you see what he rolled up in today!?” 

“Gross,” another boy laughs, “What if he wanted to do you?” 

“Ew, no way!” 

They all laugh again, and Wangji looks back again to make sure Wei Ying isn’t laughing too. He doesn’t quite understand why it’s so important to him, but he feels unspeakably relieved to see that Wei Ying isn’t laughing along with the others. 

Wei Ying stands up suddenly and kicks his chair in. The force knocks the laughing boy off his desk. 

“What do you think Wei Wuxian?” one of the boys asks, still snickering. 

Wangji isn’t eavesdropping. He’s not, he’s not, he’s not. And he doesn’t care what Wei Ying says. He doesn’t. 

“Mm, I think Nie Huaisang is rich and handsome and way more fun than you lot,” Wei Ying says easily, walking towards the door. 

“Wait where are you going?” the boys ask. 

“To talk to Huisang’s brother!” Wei Ying responds brightly, a huge smile on his face. “I’ll let him know that you guys will apologize to Huaisang, okay? Hopefully he goes easy on you.” 

With that he walks out of the classroom, whistling a song that makes the tips of Wangji’s ears go hot. 

The boys dumbly stare at each other, still crowded around a now-empty desk. 

“Wait who’s Huaisang’s brother?” one of them asks. 

“Nie... Nie...”

“Nie Mingjue.” 

There’s a split second of silence before they all start running out of the classroom, falling over themselves comically. 

“Wei Wuxian!” they yell out desperately, limbs flailing in their rush to catch Wei Ying. “Please - we were just! Please! Wei Wuxian!!” 

---

Wangji isn’t waiting for Wei Ying at the gate. 

He’s just standing there to admire the view... of the houses across their school. They’re nice houses. It’s nice to admire them. 

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Ying says, throwing an arm across Wangji’s shoulders. “You ignore me all day at school but here you are, waiting for me! I’m getting mixed signals here, Lan Zhan.” 

Wei Ying laughs delightedly and his breath is warm against Wangji’s cheek. 

“I do not... ignore you,” Wangji says, desperately hoping that Wei Ying thinks that the redness of his ears is from the cold. 

“You totally do,” Wei Ying says, “But it’s okay. I’ll forgive you since you wait for me.” He removes his arm from Wangji’s shoulders and Wangji pretends he doesn’t miss the warmth. 

They start walking, side by side, and Wangji doesn’t count how many times their arms brush together - he doesn’t. 

“Did you really talk to Nie Mingjue?” Wangji asks lightly. Just to make conversation - not because he cares. 

“You heard that?” Wei Ying asks. He sighs and shakes his head. “Idiots - all of them. I can’t wait to graduate this stupid school.” 

They are idiots, but Wangji isn’t in any hurry to graduate. Wei Ying has big dreams. He’ll probably leave their city after they graduate and only come back for holidays and... 

Well, Wangji isn’t in any hurry. He likes walking home with Wei Ying after school. Even if he has to deal with idiots all day. 

“I didn’t talk to Mingjue,” Wei Ying continues, “But they did apologize to Huaisang.” He smacks Wangji on his arm and laughs brightly. “You should have seen Huaisang’s face, Lan Zhan! He was so confused!” 

Wei Ying’s laugh and bright and beautiful and Wangji gives himself a honest moment to admire it. His fingers tingle strangely and he has this sudden desire to press his thumb against the corner of Wei Ying’s lips and... 

“You should be careful,” Wangji says, trying to reign himself back down to reality. “They’re idiots but they can be... cruel.” 

Wangji remembers what those idiots had been like before Wei Ying came to their school. Quiet and shy Wen Ning, whose only defender was his ninety pound older sister and whose only sin was that he was poor and timid. 

Wangji had known what the boys were doing was wrong - and he had told them. But the school administration had done nothing and it was against the rules to fight, so what could Wangji do? 

It was against the rules. 

It was against the rules and Wangji had been content with that until Wei Ying had transferred to their school.

Wei Ying, smart and charismatic and more than ready to break every rule. He had been the bane of Wangji’s existence at first. An annoyance Wangji could not understand. The rules were simple. Why was Wei Ying so eager to break them? 

Wangji didn’t understand - and if he’s honest, he barely understands now. But Wei Ying had taken one look at Wen Ning, had seen Wen Ning being pushed around only one time, and decided enough was enough. 

Wangji can still remember how Wei Ying’s jaw felt in the palm of his hand, as Wangji dabbed medicine on his cheeks and the corner of his lips. Can still remember the way Wei Ying’s fingers felt in his hand as Wangji dabbed ointment on his bloody knuckles. 

“You’ll be suspended,” Wangji had said softly, afraid to say what he really felt. Afraid to admit that he was sorry that he didn’t join Wei Ying in his fight. 

Wei Ying had smiled at Wangji then, and maybe that was the moment Wangji had... 

“Will you miss me, Lan Zhan?” Wei Ying had asked mischievously. 

And Lan Zhan didn’t answer then, because it was against the rules to lie. 

Wei Ying had been suspended, and those idiots had been hospitalized. Wangji had been nervous when they all came back, but maybe it was because those idiots were true idiots, or maybe it was because Wei Ying was handsome and charismatic and undeniable, but after they all came back to school, the idiots began following Wei Ying around like some stupid fan club. 

It surprised Wangji how quickly the opinions of those idiots changed, but he was grateful for it then.

Remembering it now makes a strange nervousness creep up in his stomach. 

If those idiots can change their mind so quickly... Their current good opinion of Wei Ying might... 

“Ehh, what do I care about those idiots. They have fewer brain cells than I have fingers,” Wei Ying says. He knocks his shoulder to Wangji’s. “You worried about me, Lan Zhan?” 

Wangji resolutely looks forward and does not answer because lying is against the rules. 

Wei Ying snickers and knocks his shoulder against Wangji’s again. “We’re not at school, Lan Zhan, you’re not allowed to ignore me.” 

“I do not ignore you,” Wangji answers instead. 

“Then eat lunch with me tomorrow. I’m tired of eating with those idiots.” 

Lunch? With Wei Ying? 

But... 

“They... do not like me,” Wangji says stiltedly, feeling awkward and uncool and everything Wei Ying isn’t. 

“We don’t have to eat with them! We can eat together - just us. Or maybe with Wen Ning too, if I can find him,” Wei Ying says excitedly. 

It really isn’t a good idea and Wangji really should say no. It’s enough that Wei Ying walks with him after school. It’s enough that their houses are close enough together that they can even walk to school together. It’s enough. It’s enough. 

Wei Ying’s reputation might... suffer, if he’s known to be close friends with Wangji... who is uppity and a known rule follower and no fun at all to be with... 

“I use my lunch time to revise my notes,” Wangji says, and it isn’t a lie. He does revise his notes... 

Wei Ying wilts dramatically, puffing his cheeks and pouting his lips like a child. Wangji doesn’t find it at all adorable. He doesn’t. 

They’re almost home now and Wangji has to consciously move his feet so that they don’t slow down. 

They stop in front of the gate to Wangji’s house, Wei Ying turns to face him. 

“Should I open the gate for you, young master?” Wei Ying asks playfully. 

“Boring,” Wangji replies. It’s not cute. It’s not. 

Wei Ying smiles widely up at him and Wangji has to remind his hands to remain at his side. They’re not allowed to grab Wei Ying’s perfect face and bring it close to Wangji’s. They’re not. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying says. 

“Tomorrow,” Wangji nods, trying his best not to sound too eager. 

“Try to revise all your notes today so you can eat lunch with me tomorrow, okay?” 

Wangji turns and opens the gate instead of replying. 

“Try, okay!?” Wei Ying yells after him. 

Wangji walks up the steps to his door and only then does he allow himself to turn and watch Wei Ying walk away. 

Tomorrow. 

He doesn’t plan to eat lunch with Wei Ying tomorrow but... 

But he does revise all of his notes. 

[bloody-bee-tea]

I’m seeing someone

One moment Jiang Cheng’s evening is going fine and in the next his heart is torn to shreds, and all it takes are three words.

“I’m seeing someone,” Nie Mingjue quietly says as he pushes his food around on his plate and Jiang Cheng freezes up completely.

“Oh,” he breathes out, unable to lift his eyes from Nie Mingjue’s senseless movement of his chopsticks.

“Is that—are you okay with that?” Nie Mingjue asks him hesitantly and Jiang Cheng flinches at the question.

Is he—how can Nie Mingjue even ask that of him?

Jiang Cheng tries to bite down the desperate laugh that wants to bubble up and he tries to silence his mind—of course this would happen, he’s never enough, it’s a wonder Nie Mingjue held out for so long anyway—before he plasters a smile to his face.

He just hopes Nie Mingjue doesn’t notice the tears in his eyes or the trembling of his lips.

Jiang Cheng shouldn’t have worried about that, he realizes when he tries to look at Nie Mingjue, because Nie Mingjue is not even looking at him. He’s keeping his eyes down as if he’s expecting Jiang Cheng to lash into him and Jiang Cheng wonders if that would be a more appropriate reaction to this revelation.

“Are you—” Jiang Cheng starts but of course his voice breaks half way through the sentence, so he swallows and tries again. “Are you going to break up with me?”

He’s not sure what answer he wants to hear here, but his hands shake in anticipation nonetheless.

“What? No of course not!” Nie Mingjue immediately rushes out and despite everything Jiang Cheng is relieved.

He’ll have to deal with the fact that Nie Mingjue found someone he loves more, but at least he’s not discarding Jiang Cheng entirely. At least he still wants him close.

“Okay then,” Jiang Cheng whispers, his eyes burning with tears and he finds that he’s not hungry at all anymore.

It had to happen sooner or later—everyone grows tired of Jiang Cheng after a while—but Jiang Cheng had thought they were doing well.

It hasn’t been long since he moved in with Nie Mingjue and he thought he was doing a decent job at supporting Nie Mingjue after his father was murdered but of course he was lacking somewhere.

He was always lacking something after all.

“Alright,” Nie Mingjue says just as quietly and it seems like he isn’t all that hungry anymore either, but they stay at the table, sitting in silence, until long after their food has gone cold.

~*~*~

The knowledge that Nie Mingjue is seeing someone else besides Jiang Cheng sits like a heavy weight in his stomach at all times of the day. There’s not a single moment where Jiang Cheng doesn’t feel like he’s being crushed under it and he wonders if this is really easier than simply breaking up with Nie Mingjue.

But when he thinks about that, thinks about his days without Nie Mingjue, it feels even worse than this. At least like this he still has part of him. It’s better than nothing.

And besides; Nie Mingjue was quick in his answer that he didn’t want to break up with Jiang Cheng. That has to mean something, right? Even if Jiang Cheng alone is no longer enough for him.

Jiang Cheng laughs at his own stupid, foolish thoughts, because of course it only means that Nie Mingjue got used to having him around, that he’s not ready for another big change in his life and Jiang Cheng is sure that he’s simply living on borrowed time here.

Nie Mingjue will realize soon enough that the other person can give him so much more, that Jiang Cheng is useless and a burden and then Jiang Cheng won’t even have him anymore.

It’s not something he’s looking forward to.

~*~*~

Nie Mingjue insists on telling him whenever he goes to meet the other person. Jiang Cheng wonders if he’s doing this on purpose to remind Jiang Cheng time and time again that he’s lacking, that he’s no longer enough to make Nie Mingjue happy, and whenever Nie Mingjue leans down and presses a kiss to Jiang Cheng’s head and then tells him that he’ll be back in two hours it feels like he’s cutting Jiang Cheng wide open.

And yet Jiang Cheng is always there when Nie Mingjue comes back.

He’s too weak to leave and protect himself.

~*~*~

“Hey, are you okay?” Nie Huaisang asks him on the rare occasion that Jiang Cheng agrees to meet with him and Jiang Cheng can’t help the bitter scoff he lets out at that.

“I don’t know,” he then admits in a rare burst of honesty, simply because he’s too tired to lie to Nie Huaisang.

He’s already lying to Nie Mingjue on a daily basis; every time Nie Mingjue asks him if he’s okay, Jiang Cheng lies straight to his face and he finds that he’s too exhausted to do the same to his friend.

“What’s wrong?” Nie Huaisang asks, and he has to know, right?

Surely he has to know that Nie Mingjue is cheating on him.

Is it even cheating if Jiang Cheng knows about it and kind of allows it to happen? Is there even a word for that?

“A-Cheng?” Nie Huaisang asks, the concern clear in his voice when Jiang Cheng doesn’t answer him and Jiang Cheng keeps his eyes on his hands.

“You know, right? That Mingjue is—is seeing someone?” he finally breathes out and it feels like Jiang Cheng’s entire being is bracing for impact.

“Of course I know,” Nie Huaisang immediately says and he sounds happy about it.

Jiang Cheng wants to burrow himself into the ground and never come out again.

“I introduced them,” Nie Huaisang says, and now his voice is proud.

He’s proud about ruining the best thing that ever happened to Jiang Cheng.

“I see,” Jiang Cheng breathes out and he’s itching with the need to get away, to scrub that knowledge out of his brain, but it’s there now and it already has its hooks in the most tender parts of Jiang Cheng.

Not even Nie Huaisang approves of him and Jiang Cheng thought they are friends.

“It’s helping, isn’t it?” Nie Huaisang asks and he doesn’t seem to notice that Jiang Cheng feels like the floor is crumbling under him. “Don’t you think da-ge looks so much better and happier lately?”

Jiang Cheng opens his mouth—he’s not sure if to scream or to answer Nie Huaisang—but no sound comes out.

It feels like he can’t breathe.

“I have to go,” he gets out with much difficulty and he doesn’t give Nie Huaisang enough time to answer. “Bye.”

Jiang Cheng isn’t proud of the fact that he’s running away from his only friend but if he stays he’s going to break down.

And that is something he can absolutely not do. He’s not strong enough to build himself up again afterwards.

~*~*~

Don’t you think da-ge looks so much better and happier lately?

The words rattle around Jiang Cheng’s brain ever since that day he met Nie Huaisang and he can’t make them shut up.

He noticed it too, lately, that Nie Mingjue seems to be in a better mood every week. There are still bad days, of course, so that new person is not a miracle worker, but overall Nie Mingjue does seem happier.

And doesn’t that hurt like hell.

Jiang Cheng wonders what it is he does with that other person that can be achieved in less than the two hours Nie Mingjue meets with them weekly but he finds that he can’t stomach to imagine anything.

The only thing he really can think of them doing is having sex and Jiang Cheng wouldn’t even be able to hold that against Nie Mingjue.

Jiang Cheng knows that his sex-drive is not quite as high as Nie Mingjue’s and while he never thought it to be a problem—Nie Mingjue certainly never said anything like that—maybe that’s all it is.

Maybe it’s just sex.

That—still wouldn’t make it okay, but that would at least be much easier to bear than to have to think about Nie Mingjue kissing someone else and telling them he loves them.

That one is the thought that hurts Jiang Cheng the most.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng is on the couch, trying his best to look like he’s engrossed in his book, so that Nie Mingjue won’t want to disturb him and say goodbye to him.

It’s bad enough that he keeps a regular schedule with his—lover? Affair? Partner? Jiang Cheng still has no clue how to refer to that other person and he knows it shouldn’t bother him that much but it does—but he really doesn’t need to rub it into Jiang Cheng’s face.

It already feels like Jiang Cheng is poking at a still raw wound whenever he thinks about how Nie Mingjue might call that other person when he talks about them to his friends or Nie Huaisang. He doesn’t need Nie Mingjue to make it worse.

Lost in his thoughts, Jiang Cheng allowed his eyes to wander and Nie Mingjue takes it for the invitation is so very much was not meant to be.

“Bye,” he says as he leans down to kiss Jiang Cheng’s forehead, his lips lingering for a moment, and Jiang Cheng’s heart shrivels when he thinks about how Nie Mingjue is going to kiss someone else with them in a few minutes. “I’ll be back in two hours.”

“Can you—not tell me? When you go—do that?” Jiang Cheng croaks out and he’s surprised at his own bravery.

“What?” Nie Mingjue says and he jerks away from Jiang Cheng as if he slapped him.

It’s kind of unfair, Jiang Cheng thinks, and drops his gaze.

“I don’t—want to know,” he gets out before the tears choke him up and even without looking up at Nie Mingjue he can tell that he’s angry.

And he has every right to be. Jiang Cheng just ruined the delicate balance they were maintaining.

“What the hell, Wanyin? You said you are okay with this! You accepted it!” Nie Mingjue almost yells at him and Jiang Cheng closes his eyes.

He feels like he’s going to shatter if he even so much as breathes, but he knows it’s inevitable now. Jiang Cheng ruined it and Nie Mingjue will tell him to finally get lost.

Maybe it’s better that it all ends. Jiang Cheng is tired.

“How could I ever be okay with this?” Jiang Cheng asks him as he scrubs a hand over his face. “But I have to accept it now, don’t I?” A desperate laugh bubbles up from his throat. “There’s nothing else for me to do, after all,” he whispers as he leans over, trying to protect the remnants of his heart even though he knows it’s futile.

There’s nothing left to protect after this.

“So you don’t want me to be better? Is that it?” Nie Mingjue shoots back and he sounds angry now.

Jiang Cheng almost forgot that Nie Mingjue could get this angry, but right now it only fuels Jiang Cheng’s own anger. It’s better than the despair trying to swallow him whole.

“Well, if being with me is so fucking horrible to you, then maybe we should break up after all!” he yells back and his voice rings out in the living-room.

The silence that follows is almost deafening.

“What?” Nie Mingjue whispers and there’s confusion written all over his face. “Why is this about our relationship all of a sudden?”

“All of a sudden,” Jiang Cheng repeats and he clenches his teeth when his eyes start to burn, but this time he’s not strong enough to hold back the tears. “You’re literally about to go out to meet your—whatever they are to you. How is this not about our relationship if you need to date someone on the side?”

Jiang Cheng would like to pretend that he’s strong and that his voice didn’t break on that, but the last words almost crumble in his mouth. The only good thing about this is that there are enough tears flowing down his face that Nie Mingjue is just a blur.

At least he doesn’t have to see him clearly while Nie Mingjue breaks up with him.

“Date someone on the—Wanyin, what the hell are you talking about?” Nie Mingjue asks him and suddenly he’s close, so close, and he’s putting his hands on Jiang Cheng’s arms and it’s enough to break Jiang Cheng.

“Please don’t leave me,” he sobs out and fists his hands in Nie Mingjue’s shirt. “Please, whatever it is that they—I can change. I can do better, I can be whatever you need, just, please,” he begs and he’s too terrified by the prospect of losing Nie Mingjue to feel ashamed.

“My heart,” Nie Mingjue whispers as he pulls Jiang Cheng into his arms and it only makes Jiang Cheng cry harder.

He doesn’t know how long he spends in Nie Mingjue’s arms but when his sobs finally subside he’s exhausted and he feels very, very small.

“I don’t mean to trap you in this, to force you to stay with me,” Jiang Cheng still forces himself to say as he pushes Nie Mingjue away. “Don’t listen to me. Just—I need you to choose. I can’t do this anymore.”

“Wanyin, I’m seeing a therapist,” Nie Mingjue tells him and Jiang Cheng goes very still. “I’m not dating someone else and I’m not cheating on you. I’m going to therapy, once a week.”

The words don’t really make sense to Jiang Cheng, so he stays still, hoping that their true meaning will hit him sooner or later, but the words stay the same.

“What?” he gets out and Nie Mingjue pulls him down on the couch, tucking him into his side.

“I’m going to therapy once a week. A-Sang has been going for a while, even before our father was—before he died and he recommended her to me. I’ve been going to see her for a few weeks now,” Nie Mingjue explains, but Jiang Cheng can feel that he’s shaking.

Or maybe that’s Jiang Cheng himself.

“I don’t understand,” Jiang Cheng finally admits and Nie Mingjue crushes him to his chest.

“Did you think I was cheating on you all this time?” Nie Mingjue asks and Jiang Cheng blinks.

“You said you’re seeing someone. You couldn’t even meet my eyes,” he eventually tells him and Nie Mingjue freezes.

“You thought I was cheating on you from that day on?”

“Is it really cheating if you tell me about it, though?” Jiang Cheng wonders, because that is still bothering him to no end, that he doesn’t know how to define this.

“Wanyin!” Nie Mingjue sounds close to tears himself and it’s confusing enough that Jiang Cheng pulls away from him.

“What’s wrong?” Jiang Cheng wants to know, and he’s distantly aware that maybe the only one who isn’t right is him.

“You’re asking me that? Why didn’t you break up with me if you thought I was seeing someone else?”

“You said you didn’t want to,” Jiang Cheng whispers, remembering that dinner so clearly.

It was the last time his world had been whole and good.

“If you thought this the whole time—” Nie Mingjue trails off with a shake of his head. “How could you be okay with that?”

“I thought if I say I’m not—you would leave,” Jiang Cheng admits. “You were already—I already thought I wasn’t enough. If I didn’t allow you this, what would keep you at my side? At least like this I had some of you. I always knew that this day would come, after all. You’re too good, and I’m just—not,” he finishes weakly, unable to meet Nie Mingjue’s eyes.

His mind is still reeling but Jiang Cheng is aware that pointing out his own flaws right now might not be the best thing to do.

“Wanyin, you’re my entire heart and I love you,” Nie Mingjue tells him, pulling him in to give him a soft kiss. “How could I ever leave you?”

“It seems to be easy enough,” Jiang Cheng says, trying not to think about Wei Wuxian or his parents, or even his sister but it’s always hard.

“It’s not,” Nie Mingjue says with a shake of his head. “And I am not going to leave you. I love you and I can’t even imagine seeing someone else.”

“Except your therapist,” Jiang Cheng weakly says, aware that it’s much, much to early for a joke about this, but making inappropriate jokes is the only thing he knows how to do sometimes.

“Except her,” Nie Mingjue agrees and brushes a kiss over Jiang Cheng’s cheek. “My heart, I think—maybe you should go see someone, too,” Nie Mingjue haltingly says and Jiang Cheng jerks away from him.

His mother never spoke kindly of therapists.

“I—” can’t, he wants to say, but the words die in his throat.

It’s not like anyone is really stopping him anymore and it seems to be doing Nie Mingjue some good. And Nie Huaisang, too, given that he’s been going for a while now too apparently.

“I wouldn’t know where to start,” he finally admits, because he knows he’s broken enough to make anyone despair.

It’s still a wonder Nie Mingjue even looked at him twice.

“That’s not for you to know but for you and your therapist to work out together,” Nie Mingjue softly tells him and Jiang Cheng thinks that it sounds like the most terrifying thing he has ever heard.

It also sounds like something that might be possible, if he doesn’t have to do it alone.

“Would I be going to yours, too?” he asks, his voice thin and scared and Nie Mingjue shrugs.

“I don’t know. She wasn’t too happy to take me on as well, since she’s treating Huaisang already, but we can ask her. I’m sure one meeting will be okay. And if she says she can’t take you on, I bet she has a recommendation.”

“I don’t—I can’t go alone,” Jiang Cheng says, because he knows he could never be strong enough to make that first step.

“I’ll accompany you to the first meeting,” Nie Mingjue agrees. “But she might kick me out halfway through,” he then adds with a small smile and while that is still a terrifying prospect, it also makes sense.

“Not now,” Jiang Cheng finally says, and while he sees the regret and worry on Nie Mingjue’s face, Jiang Cheng is not strong enough to see a therapist immediately. Or even this week. “Until half an hour ago I thought you were dating someone else. I need—some time first,” Jiang Cheng weakly finishes and understanding washes over Nie Mingjue’s face.

“Of course,” he agrees immediately and pulls Jiang Cheng back into his arms. “I love you. I wouldn’t cheat on you,” he says, and Jiang Cheng wonders how often he has to hear this before he can accept that these last weeks were just a huge misunderstanding.

“I love you,” Jiang Cheng gives back and for the first time since Nie Mingjue told him he’s seeing someone those words don’t cut him open.

Jiang Cheng is still scared and confused and overwhelmed, but Nie Mingjue is a warm solid presence at his side and Jiang Cheng does breathe easier now that he knows that he’s not living on borrowed time here and that Nie Mingjue loves him still.

For today, that is enough.

And no matter what the next day, or even the next week brings, Jiang Cheng thinks that he might just be able to do it if he has Nie Mingjue by his side.

Link to my ko-fi on the sidebar!

[robininthelabyrinth]

Hi! This is for the prompts: LWJ and WWX get together at Cloud Recesses but it’s a secret. When it does come out tho, probably due to WWX mischief some how. JC comes to the conclusion that LWJ has managed to ‘defile WWXs honor’ and now JC has no choice but to fight on behalf of his big brother, who clearly has been wronged.

Honor, Defended - ao3

Untamed

1

“What are they doing,” Jiang Cheng said, voice strangled, eyes staring.

Nie Huaisang stood up on his toes and squinted over his new friend’s shoulder. “Fighting?”

It looked like fighting.

“No.”

Not fighting? In that case, at least by Nie sect standards, that meant –

“Flirting?”

Jiang Cheng growled, which meant Nie Huaisang’s guess was right. “I’m going to kill the rotten bastard in white! I bet he waited until Wei Wuxian was alone just for this. How dare he take advantage of my – of Wei Wuxian!”

“I mean, I don’t know about that? They seem about tied,” Nie Huaisang said, making a mental note – not that many people could match up against Lan Wangji, especially when he was in a you-are-breaking-the-rules sort of snit. “Each one’s giving as good as the other gets, if you know what I mean…I’m talking about fighting!” He added hastily, seeing Jiang Cheng’s expression. “Just the fighting! And hey, maybe the Lan sect doesn’t flirt through fighting?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Jiang Cheng said. “All cultivation sects flirt through fighting.”

Damnit, Nie Huaisang thought to himself with a sigh. That means I’m going to have to train with saber after all if I’m going to get somewhere here, doesn’t it? Well, at least da-ge will be pleased…

“Are you going to interrupt?” he asked, hiding his face behind his fan. “If fighting is flirting…”

As expected, Jiang Cheng choked. “Not all fighting is flirting!” he hissed. “But that most certainly is!”

Nie Huaisang didn’t understand fighting, so he just shrugged.

“Why don’t you confront him later?” he suggested, but Jiang Cheng shook his head, his features already settling into a mulish expression that had no right to look as attractive as it was. “All right, I see I can’t convince you. Good luck defending your brother’s honor, then?”

-

2

“If Lan Wangji doesn’t stop flirting with Wei Wuxian in class, I’m going to do something violent,” Jiang Cheng said.

“Okay, now I know you’re delusional,” Nie Huaisang said. “But still very pretty. Oh, I’m torn…actually no, I think I’m fine. I mean, what cultivator do I know that isn’t a bit delusional?”

“Can you stop talking nonsense and focus on how we’re going to split them up?” Jiang Cheng demanded irritably. Really, it was no wonder that Nie Huaisang’s best attempts at flirting were going nowhere. Jiang Cheng was thick.

In many appealing ways. Mm.

Damn his bad taste.

“Well, I think first you have to start by reversing your statement until it resembles the truth a bit more,” Nie Huaisang said, trying to be practical. “It’s Wei-xiong that’s flirting with Lan-er-gongzi, not the other way around.”

“He’s just like that!”

“A giant flirt, you mean?”

“Sociable,” Jiang Cheng insisted with the sort of blindly loyal stubbornness that was sadly very, very appealing to those surnamed Nie. Mouthwatering, even.

“Right,” Nie Huaisang said, dabbing at his mouth with his sleeve to make sure he wasn’t drooling. “I see. All right, I’ll help you. I’ll even promise to find a way to break them up for good, guaranteed – but first you have to meet one condition.”

Jiang Cheng arched his eyebrows, looking unwillingly intrigued. “Name it.”

“You have to come up with one way in which Lan-er-gongzi has been flirting with Wei Wuxian that isn’t ‘he existed being pretty in his general direction’.”

Jiang Cheng opened his mouth.

Nie Huaisang waited.

“…maybe he should consider being less pretty,” Jiang Cheng grumbled.

Nie Huaisang patted him on the shoulder, then left his hand on his shoulder because why not.

“We’ve all thought that about him over the years,” he said. “Better luck next time.”

3

“You’re supposed to be helping me preserve my brother’s honor!” Jiang Cheng hissed at Nie Huaisang, who had made absolutely no promises of that sort without giant loopholes that he could walk right out of. “Not – encouragingthis!”

“I didn’t! I just helped Wei-gongzi play a tiny little prank –”

“With pornography!”

“Tasteful erotic art,” Nie Huaisang corrected.

“With cutsleeve pornography!”

“Cutsleeve tasteful erotic art.”

“Nie Huaisang! You’re missing the point!”

“Am I?” Nie Huaisang asked thoughtfully, tapping his fan against his lips. “I don’t know, I’m not sure I am. Can you explain what the point is again?”

Jiang Cheng threw his hands up into the air. “Listen, it was bad enough when Wei Wuxian got thrown out of Teacher Lan’s classes and had to go copy rules in the Library Pavilion for a month; that’s disgraceful and loses face for our sect, but at least his personal honor was preserved –”

Bad scholarship was, in fact, not an impediment to having personal honor. Nie Huaisang knew this fact forwards, backwards, and intimately.

“But then Teacher Lan fell for Lan Wangji’s tricks and decided to assign him to supervise copying –”

“Lan-er-gongzi has tricks? That’s news to me.”

“…well, either way, they got cooped up there in that room, together, alone, for – for weeks!”

“Hasn’t Lan-er-gongzi been using the muting spell on Wei-xiong most of that time?”

“No, eventually Wei Wuxian learned his lesson and now he shuts himself up whenever he sees him starting up the spell, he complains to me and shijie about it constantly every night,” Jiang Cheng said, grumbling. “Stop interrupting me!”

“Sorry. Go ahead.”

“Anyway, if that wasn’t enough, you’re now encouragingthis debacle by setting up a prank that involves Wei Wuxian, Lan Wangji, and cutsleeve pornography.”

“I did,” Nie Huaisang agreed. “And it’s tasteful erotic art, Jiang-xiong.”

“Why do you keep insisting on that?” Jiang Cheng snapped. “Isn’t it the same thing?”

“No,” Nie Huaisang said patiently. “Because I also have pornography, and it’s a lot less tasteful.”

Jiang Cheng stopped, utterly distracted from his previous rant. “...you do?”

“Mm. Want to see?”

-

4

“Lan Zhan! Lan Zhan, wait for me, I want to talk to you – I need you! See, for whatever reason, I can’t find Jiang Cheng anywhere. Can you help me look –”

Nie Huaisang shut his window before Jiang Cheng could overhear and get distracted.

They were busy.

-

5

“All right,” Nie Huaisang said. “I admit it, you’re right.”

Jiang Cheng looked at him. “…you do?”

“I do.”

“Right about…what?”

“About the flirting, and Lan Wangji having tricks,” Nie Huaisang said, nodding wisely. “See, the Lan sect take their rules about their forehead ribbons very seriously. It’s parents, children, and lovers only. So if you ran into Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji entangled on the path near the back mountain, both of them soaking wet, with Lan Wangji’s forehead ribbon wrapped around their wrists…why, that’s practically an elopement!”

Jiang Cheng, predictably, turned purple. “He eloped with my – I’m going to kill him!”

“Have fun with that,” Nie Huaisang said happily, and watched as Jiang Cheng drew his sword and charged, shouting something.

Wei Wuxian attempted to defend their conduct, except apparently their conduct involved finding the ghost of a Lan sect ancestor –

“Did you bow?” Nie Huaisang asked, very unhelpfully. “Both of you? So you’d say you’ve made your bows to the older generation? Have you bowed to heaven and earth yet, too?”

Lan Wangji gave him a death glare, but maybe he should have thought of that before writing to Nie Huaisang’s brother disclosing details about Nie Huaisang’s love life.

“I’m going to kill you!” Jiang Cheng roared.

Nie Huaisang smiled over his fan at Lan Wangji and gave a jaunty little wave.

-

+1

A few days earlier

“Wait, so, you’re actually together?” Nie Huaisang asked, and Lan Wangji nodded. They were having tea together the way they always did at the middle of the week, a tradition started long ago when their brothers were visiting and being utterly intolerable. Even their long-standing fight with each other would be put aside for mid-week tea. “Well done!”

Lan Wangji’s ears turned a little red. “Mm.” After a few moments, he added, “Mm.”

“No, no, I don’t think you need to worry,” Nie Huaisang said. “He may seem flighty, but he’s very loyal…the Jiang sect might object, though. They can be a bit tetchy about these things.”

Arched eyebrows.

“What do you mean, how would I know? Have you somehow missedthat I’ve been trying to snag Jiang Cheng all summer? There are more things in this world than Wei Wuxian’s waistline, shapely as it may be.”

Eyes narrowing.

“…don’t you dare tell my brother!”

A smirk, not that anyone else – excluding Lan Xichen – would know.

“I don’t care about your ‘appropriate conduct’! If you tell my brother that I’m dating instead of studying, I’ll find a way to make your life miserable, too! Just you wait!”

[stiltonbasket]

Jgy and wwx roleswap au. Thoughts?

oh gosg asdfgh I have no idea how this would go but:

consider that Meng Shi was able to read and write and (I think?) play the guqin. she likely had some ties to the upper class besides Jin Guangshan, since she was noted to be the only learned woman in the Yunping brothel; if she knew Jiang Fengmian at some point, and he discovered where she was living, he would probably have purchased her freedom before bringing Meng Shi and tiny!Meng Yao back to Lotus Pier.

Yu Ziyuan was not happy with this, but Meng Yao kept his head down and got along well with JC and JYL, and never got into trouble, so YZY didn’t complain too much about it.

meanwhile: Madam Jin has had it with her husband’s disgusting ways, and decides to get back at him. She happens to find tiny!Wei Ying on the streets of Yiling long before JFM receives word of Wei Changze, claims him as her adopted son, and purposely has her maids spread rumors that Wei Ying is actually her son by blood, conceived during an affair with one of her husband’s conveniently dead rivals.

the maids are very good at what they do, and they manage to convince the whole world that the rumor is just an uncouth bit of hearsay while also convincing everyone that Jin Guangshan spread the rumor himself in an attempt to discredit the wife who tolerated his infidelity for 10+ years but maintained her dignity anyway.

Jin Zixuan is in on the ruse, but he’s very confused. he’s also only 6 years old so he’s not really thinking about anything but snacks, puppies, and maybe getting to hold his mom’s sword if he’s very good for an entire week.

tiny Wei Ying is terrified of puppies. JZX is terrified of his tiny brother’s tears, so he gives his wonder dog away to a cousin and visits it on weekends.

Jin Guangshan sees Wei Ying as a threat to JZX (and ultimately to him, since JGS has only one heir--if anything happens to Jin Zixuan, JGS’s cousins and nephews could easily supplant him as Sect Leader) and tries to persuade Madam Jin to have him raised somewhere else, but Madam Jin refuses and manages to embarrass him even more while she’s at it. jzx is still confused, but baby Wei Ying is learning how to read with him so it’s all good. <3

8yo Yanli visits Koi Tower and falls in love. Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli are now rivals over which one of them can coddle A-Ying better. Wei Ying escapes from that battlefield and runs off to find smoll Jiang Cheng, who teaches him how to swim in one of the ornamental ponds!

he also gets a new uncle! today is a very good day and he likes it.

in later years at Lotus Pier: Meng Yao becomes a very responsible er-shixiong, goes home to his mother’s house every night, and is a Good Boy. he also helps the mustachioed Nie-da-gongzi woo the First Young Master Lan, because they’re pining for each other so hard that everyone is suffering by this point.

what would happen next? to quote nie huaisang: I don’t know, I really don’t know! XD

[kurowrites]

Wangxian prompt: Wei wuxian is born deaf. Lan wangji who uses little words and has trouble expressing himself finds a new way to talk by learning sighn language from Wei wuxian.

Bet you weren’t expecting this.

---

There is a boy that has come to Cloud Recesses with the other young disciples of the Yunmeng Jiang sect, and he is loud. He cannot take part in the lectures, and he does not speak, but still, he is here. And when he is around, everyone knows. From time to time, Lan Wangji sees him making gestures at Jiang Cheng, and then Jiang Cheng will frown. And the boy will break out into infectious laughter, bright and strange and unlike anything that Lan Wangji has ever heard.

He wonders why the boy is even here, when he cannot hear. He wonders why the Yunmeng Jiang sect would bother to educate him in cultivation at all, since he will never be allowed on a night hunt. In the dark, with only his eyes to guide him, it would be too dangerous for him, and for those who depend on his support. He will never become a full-fledged cultivator.

And yet, he sometimes sits in class, and for the rest of the time, he is allowed access to the library at Cloud Recesses while everyone else is in class. Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren permitted it, though why they did, Lan Wangji does not know. For all his constant mischief-making, the boy pours over the scrolls and books in the library with a serious expression whenever no one is looking. Lan Wangji once catches a glimpse of his notes, and they are extensive. He also seems to sometimes be using a kind of shorthand Lan Wangji does not recognise.

That boy might just be very, very smart.

-

Whenever Lan Wangji enters the library when Wei Wuxian is there, Wei Wuxian will wave at him and make a sign. Lan Wangji thinks he is probably just trying to say hello, but he is unable to quite figure it out.

As soon as he sits down and starts to read or write himself, Wei Wuxian will start pelting him with pieces of paper. All of them contain some kind of message.

Lan Zhan, what are you doing?

Lan Zhan, can you get me access to the forbidden section?

Lan Zhan, stop ignoring me!

Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan

I can see you reading and ignoring each and every one of these, and you make me sad.

That last one is followed by a sloppily drawn sad face.

Lan Wangji glares at him and finally writes out a reply.

Work.

Wei Wuxian laughs boisterously, and his laugh is beautiful.

-

 One day, Wei Wuxian must be bored, because he sits next to Lan Wangji and starts badgering him, pulling his sleeve, and reaching for his wrist to get Lan Wangji’s attention. When Lan Wangji finally looks up, his usual glare in place, Wei Wuxian gives him a little wave, signs something, and then touches Lan Wangji’s chest. Lan Wangji is nearly ready to jump up, when Wei Wuxian repeats the same motion again, determined.

It takes him a moment, but then he realizes.

It is not just a hello. Wei Wuxian has been saying his name all along.

Hello, Lan Zhan.

With trembling fingers, he reaches out and touches Wei Wuxian’s chest. And Wei Wuxian gives him a brilliant smile, and signs something different.

Wei Ying.

-

 It’s simple things that he learns at first.

Book. Brush. Give me. Hungry. Eat. Sleep.

Good night, Wei Ying. Good morning.

No. No, Wei Ying, stop that.

He has to use that last one a lot, accompanied by Wei Ying’s laughter.

-

 Wei Ying gets along well with Wen Ning. Wen Ning has a slight speech impediment, and it is clear that the boy takes to conversing by signing with something akin to relief. He picks up the most important signs quickly, and it does not take long for them to start having conversations with each other. Nie Huaisang is another one. For all that he is lazy during class, he is a quick study when it comes to getting involved into mischief together with Wei Ying. And when either of them is at a loss of words, there are always Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli to help. Jiang Yanli in particular, Lan Wangji notes, signs along with her speech habitually – does it even with other people’s speech – so that Wei Ying’s eyes automatically look for her whenever someone is talking and he wants to know what is being said. Jiang Cheng too seems fluent in conversing with Wei Ying, and especially fighting with him, both of them signing at each other with large, emphatic movements.

Lan Wangji keeps watching them all. He wished he could express himself that well.

(He can. He just does not dare to do it just yet.)

-

 Wei Ying practices sometimes with Jiang Cheng, has his own sword, but Lan Wangji notices quickly that he has another issue besides his lack of hearing: His balance is slightly off, sometimes, and Lan Wangji knows he is trying to hide it, but it is another disqualification as a cultivator. If he loses his balance at the wrong time, he is dead. It hurts Lan Wangji a little, the thought that so much promise will never be able to blossom. Not in the society they have been born into. They will never see him as more than a liability.

-

 Wei Ying cannot hear the guqin, but he seems fascinated by the instrument. He sometimes joins Lan Wangji when he is practicing, listening to him play and yet not hearing him.

One day, Lan Wangji is struck by an idea. All cultivators are aware of the technique generally called Chord Assassination, and they know of its deadly effect. What most people do not know is that there is a lot of room in between trying to kill someone and just playing the guqin with absolutely no intent at all. So he plays a note and sends it towards Wei Ying, not with the intent to kill, but with enough force to push someone back.

Wei Ying is out of the path of the sound before Lan Wangji can even process it. He nearly falls over a chest in the process and just barely catches himself. Wei Ying looks at him with big eyes.

Are you crazy? Are you trying to kill me?

No. You can feel it.

Of course I can! Murderer!

Most cannot.

Wei Ying looks at him, more confused and less angry this time.

Most cannot feel the spiritual energy of the guqin. Only its effects.

Oh, that look in Wei Ying’s eyes. He has awakened something, he has no doubts.

(It turns out Wei Ying likes to listen to Lan Wangji play the guqin because it gives him mushy feelings inside. Lan Wangji has to lock himself in the Jingshi for a bit and tell himself repeatedly that Wei Ying has no way of knowing what he has been playing a lot lately.)

(Wei Ying is like ‘this has to be good for something’ as he digs through countless old texts, and that might be how he figures out the Compass of Evil.)

-

 The first time Lan Wangji openly signs to Wei Ying in front of other people, their audience is shocked. They didn’t know that Lan Zhan learned to sign, and none of them have ever seen him speak for so long. And no one has any idea at all what he’s saying. (Except Jiang Yanli, who is also there and who will not say a word, only smile serenely.)

He starts becoming Wei Ying’s ears more and more often, and eventually, he also becomes his mouth. (The gap between Wei Ying’s words and Lan Zhan’s appearance is used to devastating effect.)

-

 And because Lan uses his hands much better than his words… Wei Ying understands what it means to be loved.