#even wondering about the fuckin
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Major in Linguistics, they said! It’ll be fun, they said………
#zeeposting#help me God#you put so many different languages and accents in an isolated location#and dialects are born#even wondering about the fuckin#accent map of the neath has me off my shit#especially considering just how isolated some of these groups are#venderblight has a fucking nyc type complexity of accents#by city era. by district .#good lord
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shitty comic that doesn't really mean much WOOOOOOO happy new year
I'm glad I have something to look forward to.
#...kinito for scale#mmmfeel oddly strange about maintagging this. anyways#chonny jash#chonny's charming chaos compendium#chonny jash fanart#cccc fanart#chonny jash soul#cj soul#chonny jash mind#cj mind#chonny jash heart#cj heart#anyways uh. that's the. last time this year i'll use those tags lmao#for those who read the tags‚ thank you#thanks so much for supporting me. this is the first year i've really actually put effort into posting stuff online#and i've probably said this hundreds of times but the fact that. people like my half baked art is. fuckin insane#i've!!!! also made tons of friends!!!!!! who like the same shit i do !!!!!!!! :D !!!!!!#thanks for sticking around and dealing with my bullshit lmao. i love you all very dearly#and i hope this new year brings wonderful things for all of you#and i hope you know that you are loved.#gah that's corny as fuck lmao uhh#if i don't see you#good afternoon#good evening#and good night!#:]
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It's my right to tell myself I can do just a little animation just for fun just for really quick to do some action and then spend 3 days straight on it
#animation#we were legion#2d animation#sketch animation#sketch#zagan#I jut really like drawing action okay...#Time and time again is too nice of a comic ykwim its like all about grief and forgiveness and self love#so the whole point is that there's other ways and we will always try for something better#and we will grow together#BUT NOT THIS COMIC!!!<t#this comic is about a demon who is a complete asshole and resorts to violence over literally everything!#he like gets better#but there's still action the whole time...#cause its not about anything serious its about like hey maybe theres OTHER things you can do that are cool#and that violence immediately isn't the best way to go...#but like sometimes violence is allowed#and so even in the end once he's better as a person#there can still be fights#YAYYYYYY#I love action AHHAHAHAHA#its so much fun to draw#ughhh#such a fuckin wonderful way to explore my love of anatomy and dynamic poses#like YES yes yes yes yes yes yes#let me draw a guy at like 100 different angles and they all have to match up believably#PLEASE GOD ITS SOO GOOD I LOVE IT#also I keep watching the animation. I like how it came out a lot...#ok bye.
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Okay, so my experience with Stranger Things is a weird one.
I didn't care when it first came out, started to watch it out of "might as well" in 2020, wasn't interested in it enough to make it past S2, forgot about it outside of going "oh, hey, cool, there's a lesbian in it now, I guess," in S3, got really annoyed when "Running Up That Hill" got popular from it because it was a song I listened to on fucking loop after one of my best friends died in high school and I fully expected its appearance in the show to ignore the whole survivor's guilt theme of the song (and was very happy to learn later that it did the exact opposite of ignoring the lyrics), saw people drawing Eddie, suddenly got a lot more interested, watched just the fourth season like a fucking psychopath because I was seriously only there for Eddie, then got interested enough to start the show over properly, having mostly forgotten what I did watch of the show before.
And let me tell you something from the perspective of someone who started with the complete fourth season, who wasn't there from the start, who wasn't tainted by ship goggles or this internal battle of hope and despair, who wasn't theorizing about what the painting could be or expecting Mike and Will to kiss when Volume 2 happened or rooting for Mike and Eleven's relationship to go down in flames or whatever the fuck. Just someone who went blind into Season 4.
It's really fucking obvious that Will and Mike are gonna be endgame.
Like holy fuck. It's so fucking blatant I don't even know why people are nervous.
No sane fucking person would shoot this scene this way if they wanted the audience to care about El and Mike as a couple. Despite being all blurry in the background, Will's reaction to what's happening here is smackdab in the fucking middle, clearly showing that the important part is what's going through his head here. What he's feeling. It's like the opposite of that scene from Kingdom Hearts II where Sora and Riku reunite and Kairi just fucking vanishes into the aether while it's happening because, despite the fact that she was standing between them when the scene began, she doesn't matter to the scene, so she's just kind of gone when the camera angle changes. Will could have been behind one of their heads, or so far in the distance he blends in with the background, but he's not. He's so obvious that despite being massively blurred out, he's still the first goddamn thing you look at. What, you think that's an accident? You think he's in the middle of this dramatic fucking scene because of a mistake? He basically has a big flashing neon arrow pointing at him with "THIS IS THE POINT" being screamed through a megaphone.
And then this?
They're paired up like they're taking fucking prom pictures. Each one of these pairs is so fucking close to one another and so fucking far from everyone else. It's not, "Oh, they're standing vaguely near each other in a group shot," it's fucking Noah's Ark out here. Again, there's no way to take this as an accident. It's not just a framing issue. If they wanted to make the shot look balanced while still not hiding anyone else behind El, they would have scattered people around much more naturally. Even if they wanted to keep Nancy with Jonathan and Hopper with Joyce, there's so much room on that hill for three people to stand on El's left and three on her right. But they didn't do that. They put Mike and Will together on purpose in the most obvious way possible.
Like I get that coming up with crackpot theories is fun in and of itself and I'm not blaming anyone for having fun. I totally get the appeal of arguing a point and reaching for every stupid little thing to pull into it because it's like a game, okay? I've done that. But if you're trying to actually convince someone (whether it's someone who wants to believe or someone who's pissed at the very idea that Mike and Will could be in love), stay away from blue and yellow lights, stay away from costume design, stay away from the existence of closets in backgrounds. And don't worry about whether Mike's gay or bi when he's in love with Will either way. I'll give you a little tip about persuasion: You're only as strong as your weakest argument. Even if you've got strong stuff in there, too, the person you're trying to convince is going to dismiss anything you say as complete insanity the second you start going on an entire tangent about the shape of a character's fucking pocket.
Sometimes, clothes are just clothes. Sometimes, there's a closet in the background because it helps establish that a character is in a bedroom. Sometimes, blue and yellow are just a couple of colors that look nice together. And sure, it might be set designers and costume designers and cinematographers smirking and winking at the audience from behind the camera. But if the show was just those things, instead of those things in the context of everything else, they wouldn't be saying anything of note.
But this?
This tells a story all on its own. Someone with no context can look at this and automatically assume that each paired person is standing with someone they care about deeply, seeking comfort as they watch some sort of disaster unfold. And yeah, romantic couples usually come in twos, and we live in an amatonormative society, so that's going to be the first association anyone makes seeing a bunch of people paired off.
It's the same reason you look at this
And go, "Oh..."
"Those two are probably a couple."
And I genuinely don't understand how people could have watched S4 Vol. 2 and gotten scared. Because as someone who went in with no investment whatsoever, I just looked at these two--
--and went, "Oh, those two are a couple. Good for them." And I moved on. Shut up about the trees for five seconds and just see the forest for what it is.
Oh, and if you're still nervous? Little thing from a storyteller here: You don't leave a hanging thread like "Will confessed his romantic feelings for Mike by projecting them onto El, but Mike either didn't understand or at least didn't say he understood," without coming back to that later. That's Chekov's gun hanging on the wall, babes. It's gonna fire at some point. If Mike was going to reject Will's feelings, if they weren't relevant, they would have had that discussion in Argyle's van. There'd be no reason to leave you in suspense.
#byler#meta#stranger things#theory#I mean I fucking guess#in the same way gravity is a fuckin' theory.#It feels silly that I even have to say this honestly.#Watching people freak out over these two feels like I'm being pranked.#Like you guys aren't pulling a Goncharov are you? Just making believe there's any chance these two aren't gonna be endgame?#Like completely ironically? And I'm too autistic to catch it?#It genuinely feels like I'm explaining that red and blue make purple here. As if you guys should have learned this in kindergarten.#Or like watching whole-ass adults watch Cinderella for the first time and being on the edge of their seat#wondering if she's going to live happily ever after with the prince or not.#It feels like I'm talking DOWN to people and I don't WANT it to feel like that but it's so obvious and I don't want people to be like#anxious for no reason you know?#Like I get that we're all scarred from queerbaiting and I know you guys are biased from years of shipping these kids.#But like. These guys? The most obvious 'there's only one way this could go' couple I've ever seen? You're scared about THEM?
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its so crazy that staff was like "yeah we're adding the grand exchange shop to fix the rampant issue of ancient gene clutter!" and we were all like "yay!" and then they just. didn't fix the issue of clutter in the marketplace. which was what we all actually cared about. And now it's to the point where i've been camping this mp with 5 min timers for (no joke) the last 9 fucking hours trying to find Secondary Gene: Striation (MODERN) while every ancient variation has stocked plentifully and often. and when the next ancient inevitably comes out next month it's going to get even worse. like. Man.
#sometimes i wonder if they even play the damn game bc if they did they would realize how bad the mp is rn. ''chime they have personal accs''#then why haven't they fixed this if they know. Like do they know. DO THEY KNOW? I dont know im going fucking insane rn man. 9 hours.#fr#flight rising#ancients#chimechatter#it did stock finally btw sometime during hour 9. im good i dont need it anymore. but like. Nine fuckin hours for a single gene. insane shit#what is so hard about just stuffing all the ancient genes in the grand exchange shop where theyre always stocked & can have dom discounts#& then leaving the treasure MP for the moderns. i am demoralized.
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ik ppl hate fictional deadbeat moms but im an avid enjoyer. my feminism knows no bounds truly/j
like i get it she did a bad job. but shit she still did a job that's for sure!! like. she did it do you understand. 14 year old girl is pregnant. it's disgraceful. a shameful stain on her family. yusuke doesn't seem to have grandparents or anything so besides yusuke's bio dad she's got no one. and then when yusuke is a toddler the father disappears and considering who he is and what he's like that's probably for the best. gonna go out a limb and say that yusuke was maybe 4 or 5 when his dad cleared out so. at 18 and entirely alone. atsuko looked down at this little thing. this baby because he's still a baby to her this is a baby who only has her. Not even 4 feet tall with the biggest brown eyes looking to her for everything because he quite literally has no one else.
he doesn't know she's a failure yet. he doesn't know people will look down on them just because he exists as he is. he doesn't know how hard this is going to be from now on. all he knows is he loves his momma
so she doesn't cry. she just meets his big innocent eyes and goes "it's just you and me kid" and yusuke doesn't know that that's a sad thing.
so she takes care of him the best she can and it still sucks but yusuke doesn't know what the standard she should be held to is yet. for a small time she is the greatest and best person in his world and he's the only one who thinks so
then he meets keiko and her parents and finds out that his normal is actually dysfunctional and that his mom actually isn't all that great. that living day to day in the bottom of a bottle isn't healthy. so she's no longer praiseworthy but this person he's responsible for. just like that the roles reverse. because while she was all yusuke had yusuke is also all atsuko has. he doesn't respect her but he still punched the motherfucker in the mouth that called her a tramp. she taught him how to do it.
atsuko comes to terms with the fact that Yusuke doesn't really need her anymore, probably never did so she doesn't bother to care when he skips school or beats whoever he wants to a pulp or gambles because at 14 she was expecting so what the fuck can she really say about him. he sneers at her as he makes her coffee. atsuko lights another cigarette
it feels like betrayal when her son dies. at 14 she had him so how can he die at a sorry age like that. i wasted my teenage years on you for what? so you can die and leave me here? you fucking brat. how can she recover from this? yusuke was all she had. he hadn't looked up at her with an admiring gaze since he was 7 and stopped hugging her goodbye soon after but still he was hers he was hers and then he was gone
but then he comes back. and she doesn't get much better as a mom or as a person really. she tries harder than before maybe (keeping him in school) but yusuke never expected her to. he's made up of her bad habits and uncaring attitude but he's so much better than her. became something good something strong despite how shitty of a job she did raising him.
she's not proud because she has no right to be but something like it tugs in her chest when she sees him feeding the people he cares about at his little ramen cart looking as happy as the first time she'd taken him out to park.
yusuke's dad suggests taking another crack at the whole family thing and she wants to laugh in his face. the only family she'll ever have is that little boy who's stronger and braver than she'll ever be.
she doesn't want to see him laying cold in a casket ever again. he's meant for life, a soul as bright and durable as his. atsuko hopes he lives to see the sun explode
#atsuko urameshi#yusuke urameshi#yu yu hakusho#atsuko means warm child and i wonder if she was.#your son is sleeping and you're worried he won't wake up because you've seen him laying dead before#it takes her back to when he was small enough to cradle. she'd stay up all night just watching him breathe#because he was just so small and she'd heard about that infant death syndrome thing#and what if he just stopped breathing and she was alone#she's not a good mom but she's still his mom and he loves her even though she fuckin sucks!#also the fact that atsuko has connections to the Yakuza which is how she keeps yusuke in school#And pays their expenses is so crazy to me and also apt lmaoo#the Infamous Urameshis#people fear the very name 😤#atsuko taught him how to fight you can't convince me otherwise
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hear me out
they're attuned
#obikin#rgu tag#gushing in detail in the tags instead of the body in true tmblr fashion#and p.s. i know this only makes sense to fans of both of these things so i am. sorry#it's about one party more inclined for some kind of repression for their affection#even tho that love is like. so intrinsic to their narrative. outwardly stoic in the face of the other except when the dynamic fuckin Snaps™#the other party struggling between admiration and bitterness. placing the other on some kind of pedestal but hating them for being there#festering in “they're wonderful and better than me and it's so obvious why someone else i'm interested in would admire them more”#even while their counterpart is so devoted and on some level the envious partner Knows this#and is inclined every so often to take advantage of it#one side appears So Cool until they're shattering for the other & the other side is So Petty driven largely by their Complex for them#they're not always toxic and they've had enough love for it to still be there but over time it's like all they can do is hurt each other#they also have swords and are bi hey
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they really needed to give stolitz an episode of just hanging out not under-duress before they gave them this big romantically charged duet
#woke up mad. better complain about this show-#idk why do they like each other. seeing stars happened i guess but the whole premise of that was dumb#and they didnt even really talk blitz just identity thefted and had a flashback while stolas clapped#idk. we needed like 1 ep of these just fuckin. hanging out#even ignoring the um. the everything that they accidentally wrote stolitz to be#genuinely what do they do. what do they like about each other. how do they connect#you cant just show us split second single frame images of all the times they were totally together and say it counts#like. idk you started making shorts this year it could've been a short#genuienly i think just 5 minutes of dumb pillow talk would've done wonders for me thinking these two actually gaf#even if that shitassed bird getting any screentime makes me roll out of the morgue and into traffic so my corpse gets turbo crushed
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Chapters: 4/4 Fandom: Trigun Stampede (Anime 2023), Trigun (Anime & Manga 1995-2008), Trigun - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Vash the Stampede/Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Milly Thompson & Nicholas D. Wolfwood Characters: Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Vash the Stampede (Trigun), Milly Thompson, Meryl Stryfe, Livio the Double Fang (Trigun) Additional Tags: Ghosts, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bed & Breakfast, Pre-Relationship, T4T Vash the Stampede/Nicholas D. Wolfwood, paranormal activity, Flirting, Grief/Mourning, Alcohol Series: Part 1 of just a ghost out of his grave Summary:
Freelance worker and self-proclaimed skeptic Nicholas D. Wolfwood has his strangest job yet: investigating the local “haunted” bed & breakfast. He’s quickly distracted by the establishment’s attractive owner… but finds it increasingly difficult to explain away the odd things happening around them.
the last chapter is finally officially finished!!!!!!!! exactly 22,222 words long (and WHAT a happy accident that is), it’s a bite-sized longfic for all your ghostly desires. wahoo!!!!!!!
#speculation nation#trigun#vashwood#fanfic#im fuckin stoked about the 22222 words thing you guys dont even understand. that was not intentional at all#i had no idea how long this thing was going to be. and it is Such... a wonderful number.... im so happy....#anyways. come read this!!! i worked rly hard on it. you wont regret it... probably...#yes i did name the fic after the mother mother song. dont worry about it. it's Atmospheric ok. hehehe
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Ya gal officially has 4 jobs🤪
#personal*#jess talks#you’re not looking at a full time freelance illustrator/graphic designer | Etsy shop owner | early years playworker & Sainsbury’s employee#😂😂😂#so happy honestly cus it means I’ll be earning like £1k a month with both part times combined#AND still have time to run my shop/do commissions!!#I genuinely thought I’d have to give up my art stuff#but low-key this is the best outcome ever#I can finally start saving to move out and get my license😭#even just a motorbike will do me wonders#and I can drive that without a full license#but omg guys I’m so fuckin happy#the new job is legit 2 seconds from my house too😭 (it’s the village shop on my road)#so I can pick up more shifts if I want and not stress about travel#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SCREAMING
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I'm exhausted. People exhaust me.
#mah posts#rl has been confusing and exhausting and even on here someone decided to kick in the door to be confusing and exhausting#and I don't Understand#rl: I say what I mean and I mean what I say#and people bend over backwards to sift me through some unspoken bs filters to Decipher What I Really Must Mean#and I'm just like#how tf do I be even clearer? there is no ulterior motive or whatever here#this isn't a fuckin HINT janet I said what I meant and I meant what I said please for the love of god just Stop#and then I open my messenger on the app here and get told someone who'd followed me for like idk a decade has decided I suck because I#and I quote#“keep posting reactionary things about AI”#wtf am I even#can I not just exist in peace please what fuckin societal filter was something I reblogged from the toilet taken to mean about me#can everyone please just fucking chill with reading weird shit into my every nuance I am so so so simple guys I really am#i'm so fuckin tired#also for the record the unfollow button doesn't require written notice to use plz just hit da bricks if a decade of me reblogging weird shi#is suddenly nefarious or whatever the hell#remember when it was the big THING to use side blogs for every single interest - I never did that#I have literally never had the energy#if my random reblogs of whatever strange shit of the day has gotten Tiring just go it's fine I won't even notice what is the poooooiiiiint#block me if you don't want me to see you on my dash anymore at least I think it works like that IDEFK#if I wonder about it in a few years I'll just go 'eh maybe they don't use tumblr anymore like half the people I think I still follow'#and then reblog a cat video or w/e and move on with my life#rambling in the tags because none of this by itself is really post worthy I'm just Tired#I've been Tired for weeks over the rl part and was especially depressed about it today#this has just been a sneaky snowball of exhausting crap and I'm so tired
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god I wish I could look up ftm stuff without being hit by an absolute deluge of detrans/pregnancy shit in the tags. I viscerally hate both of those things to the point that I mostly just don't go looking anymore because it isn't worth it. would it be so damn hard to not put those things under the regular ftm tag.
I don't blame the people with those kinks for having them mind you, it just feels really inconsiderate to be throwing your "teehee I'm a confused girl" fantasy shit directly into the faces of anyone who searches ftm tags and might already be really fucking tired of hearing that from people who are completely serious.
#considering how much work it is in real life just to get people to stop treating me like Nonbinary Plus™ it's just. must we#why is everyone's first reaction to trans men apparently to find absolutely any excuse to not refer to them as men#I mean I know why it's because we let the terfs con everyone into their whole 'the only correct opinion about men is to hate them' tripe#but still it's annoying and disheartening like no wonder I've got perpetual imposter syndrome#even my fuckin mom after I came out was like 'oh yes you know I've always seen you as more gender neutral'#WELL THAT SUCKS FOR YOU BECAUSE I'M NOT#I HAVE A GENDER. NOT THE GENDER ANYONE APPARENTLY WANTS ME TO HAVE BUT I HAVE IT NONETHELESS#DON'T REALLY CARE ANYMORE THAT IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE NOT BEING ABLE TO SHIT ON MEN AROUND ME#the really annoying thing is that the whole 'trans fetishization' thing (WHEN IT'S CONSENSUAL) can be hot just.#not in the way these people are doing it
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// tw blood //
yeah teachers satosugu is fun but how bout cult leaders satosugu
#tw blood#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#satosugu#gojo satoru#geto suguru#sorry but i HAD to draw gojo with blood all over his face#i have SO many thoughts about this AU#i know gojo is cat-coded as hell but consider: geto's loyal guard dog gojo#he will do all the dirty work without geto even asking him. he'd stain his hands red for geto without question.#theyre so disgustingly in love#this all started with me brainrotting in my friend's dms#and us wondering what wouldve happened if geto said yes when gojo asked him if he should kill everyone in the room when he retrieved riko#and things kinda spiraled from that point onwards#that sketch with geto holding him back happened because i was thinking about that “GET YO FUCKIN DOG BITCH” “it dont bite” “YES IT DO” vine#geto's the brains of the operation and gojo's the brawn#(if only because gojo's too lazy and thinks murder is the fastest way to solve all their problems)#ok im rambling too much bye#my art
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#for all that i have some beefs with george lucas i DO think that the uhhhhhh decline of star wars in the disney era#(this is not universal and mostly in reference to the latest trilogy and some of the shows)#is due to a loss of message#the reason rogue one and andor are the BEST examples of new star wars is that they are#like the original trilogy and the prequel trilogy#EXPLICITLY antifascist#the original trilogy was made in a time when the echoes of WW2 were much louder and more recent#and the prequels when a lot of the same problems were beginning to stir in american politics#and it makes me fuckin insane because TFA was a GOOD movie!! people criticized it for being too much like#a new hope but like that was FINE for fuck's sake there's nothing wrong with recycling a narrative#as long as you make it new and interesting#but to then come back post 2016 with TLJ??? the milquetoast of it all#you had the absolute perfect setup with the first order as a new uprising of fascism in the wake of the fall of the empire#the alt-right parallels were very clear. the focus on disaffected young men taking up the banner of an evil fallen empire#in the form of kylo was all right there. the narrative of losing loved ones to hate and conspiracy. AND THEN RIAN FUCKING JOHNSON#*takes a few deep breaths*#i don't hate rian johnson i think he's a very competent filmmaker. but he should never have done star wars bc i simply do not think#he UNDERSTANDS star wars#i think he wanted to come in and have some fun with a lot of the hallmarks of star wars. he wanted to deconstruct#(he wanted what kotor2 has and failed miserably tbqh)#and in so doing completely lost the thread of what these movies are about#and then TRoS was just a fucking mess of trying to tie things up#like im certainly not saying i think jj would have made a wonderful perfect trilogy if he'd been given the whole thing but i DO#think it would have been more coherent than what we got#like they could have given it to anybody just give it to someone who fuckin gets it#anyway i love u space grandpa even though i hate you space grandpa and im glad you were always an anti-fascist
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#fucking LIVID#do NOT fuck with my dom#i am her guard dog and i will not hesitate to rip you to fucking shreds#you do NOT take advantage of someone's disability to manipulate them info staying with you#you sick fuck#no fucking wonder no one else in the group wants to be around you anymore#you are un FUCKING believable and i cannot wait until the day i no longer have to worry about you and your stupid pouty fucking bullshit#and don't even get me started on yhe way you treat “”your sub“” she deserves better than your dumbass and when she sees it she will be GONE.#you are fucking despicable. vile. rotton to the fucking core.#being raised by fuckin therapists really gave you suuch a fuckin complex huh#you aren't morally superior for being born into queerness#you're the equivalent of a nepo baby piece of shit who never had to fucking do anything for themself#i cannot fucking STAND THIS SHIT !!!!!!!!#rotten** the** (i am not retyping all that)
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#remind me to never ask my mother for opinions on absolutely anything ever again#i only wanted to see which illustration should go on my portfolio for kidlit art#and her wonderful opinion was to take out an illustration of two dudes EATING TOGETHER because and i quote#"gay relationships are not suitable for children books. it simply isn't their target audience''#does she need the list of the thousand of books that are literally about gay couples or about gay kids?!#they're not even like overtly gay they are literally eating together!!! (sure it is actually gay cause it's fanart of a bl but whatever lol#it's literally two guys sitting at the same table eating...#how is that not appropriate for children?!#also even if they were gettin married or whatever... how's that inappropiate?!#ALSO also i'm sick of reading in every illustration agency how they're looking for artists and writers and whatever who tackle queer storie#like sure i'm not gonna say gay people don't experience discrimination but it's not the fucking 50s... there are opportunities out there#idk i'm just so fuckin upset right now because she's saying I'M the one that's taking it bad#like the whole ''i'm not homophobic but.... blah blah''#and it drives me up the fucking walls to have to deal with this when the only thing i wanted was to have a char about which drawing looks#the best for a professional portfolio lol#anyways now out of fucking spite i'm gonna send all the gay ones i have lol#dkfjhkdfg#angel talks#personal#wish me luck on this email btw i need work!#dfkjghdfg
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