#even though i know it would never work in canon because it goes against everything he stands for

[4sh-n4]

AU where bruce and co. (his entire hoarde of kids, even jason in disguise) are at a gala. And it's a really big gala, party of the year type of thing in Gotham, absolutely unmissable. And usually, even the rogues know that this night is off limits, so it's relatively safe. So, they're all at this gala, right?

And then the joker crashes it because he has no respect for Gotham traditions. Breaks in through a window, yada yada. He starts to go on this whole villain speech as per usual, and everyone is waiting for the heroes to come. But all the heroes are at the gala, in their civilian identities, with a thousand eyes on them. No one can reasonably slip away, except for maybe jason, who's already seething mad and ready to attack. But with the chaos and people trying to get away, all the exits are blocked, and his helmet is at home.

Bruce is at the front of the crowd, facing the Joker. Joker sees him and makes a comment about Jason, and goes on about how Bruce must've felt when his baby died. And then he brings up how he killed the little birdie too, just a few days before the terrorist attacks that allegedly killed Jason. And he mentions how much he tortured Robin before his death, and Bruce snaps.

He leaps forward, absolutely hammering the shit out of the joker. Beats him up so bad, no finesse or technique to it, just pure rage. His kids try to pull him off, to no avail. No one else even tries. By the end of it, by the time the police arrive, the joker is more blood than body, and Bruce has finally calmed down. Everyone is just staring at him in shock, understandably. (The joker ends up in hospital, paralysed and in a coma)

His kids all drag Bruce home and give him an entire lecture about his persona and how his cover has probably been blown. About excessive violence and how he refused to kill joker but then pulled this in public?? They're all worried about the fallout in the news the next day.

No one sleeps that night, for various reasons, but then when the newspaper comes out the next morning... there's just nothing bad written?? The headline is something about Bruce being a hero for saving everyone from the joker, but there's no other mention about Batman or anything else.

Turns out, no one in Gotham is surprised that Brucie Wayne, no 1 airhead, beat up the joker because "did you SEE him as a teenager?? We were all just glad when he came from his travels pretending to be stupid instead of picking fights with everyone. If anything, it's understandable that he snapped, I would too if a clown started bragging about killing my son." The only reason no one brought up his violent past is because they were worried he would revert back to that behaviour.

[pico-farad]

I finished season 1 of Vrains and it was cool but I thought it needed about 2 billion more secret identity shenanigans

extended thoughts below

So I went into a deep dive in my last two posts (1, 2) about all the problems I had with Vrains, and you'd think I didn't enjoy it, but in fact as I was watching, there was a separate, parallel version of Vrains that was playing in my head, a Yugioh I think we were robbed of and which fixes every problem I had with the first season, and that is Secret Identities AU.

Yusaku needs FRIENDS

This is YUGIOH.

This dynamic is everything I wanted from Vrains. Yusaku developing unexpected fondness for these bozos who think he needs a defense squad. I want Miraculous Ladybug levels of secret identity shenanigans. I want Yusaku slapping his duel disk every time Ai tries to blow their cover.

This AU sprung forth from the scene in the duel club where he shows Naoki his decoy deck. Having Yusaku passing as a bad duelist is 1) so funny, but 2) Yusaku needing to maintain his low profile is a useful contrivance for other characters to get more duels, and 3) I think it would be a really fun one-off episode where Yusaku has to duel using his bad deck. When he wins, Naoki is so proud he cries.

Having Yusaku actually have to interact with the other characters in the real world opens up Greek play levels of dramatic irony. The crux of a secret identity story is that every single interaction builds up anticipation, because you the viewer know that the other party is being deceived, and that the tension will snap when the secret is revealed.

I have zero anticipation about Playmaker's identity being revealed, because Aoi would be like "oh.... I guess he goes to my school" and Go would be like "have I seen that guy before?" But SIAU Playmaker? My guy is making friends just so he can betray them. Insane.

Go needs A ROLE IN THE STORY.

I said in my first post that Go isn't a rival or a best friend character. SIAU fixes this by making him both simultaneously.

Having him be the ace of the duel club is a natural replacement for his whole hero of the orphans schtick, while placing him directly the circle of relevance with the other characters. Instead of being disgruntled that the orphans suddenly like Playmaker more than him, he's disgruntled that Naoki and the duel club mooks are fawning over Playmaker -- which is actually just Naoki's character anyway.

I would kill for a big dramatic moment where Go learns that Playmaker and Yusaku are the same person, and even though Go feels betrayed that Yusaku has been deceiving him, he stands by Yusaku anyway because they're friends.

With a secret identity story, every conversation is working on multiple levels because each character is working with asymmetric information. You get these fascinating, layered scenes of two characters talking past each other because they cannot give up their secret.

Which would go especially hard with Go and Yusaku, because Go has legitimate criticisms of Playmaker in canon and Yusaku has legitimate reasoning behind the things he does, and as Go Onizuka and Playmaker they could never come to an understanding on them, but as Go and Yusaku, two friends in duel club, that door becomes open to them.

Aoi needs WRITING THAT ISN'T A TRAINWRECK

I made a whole post on this. Basically every problem would be solved if Akira doesn't know that she's Blue Angel. There's no reason for her to lose grotesquely against Yusaku, or have her basic autonomy called into question constantly. 

Having her actively deceive her brother is delicious. Like I said in my last post, it's so obvious how Akira's overprotectiveness has taken its toll on Aoi, and pushed her into developing this other persona, Blue Angel. I want this absolutely dysfunctional sibling relationship so badly. The Blue Angel vs. Zaizen duel would make me lose my mind.

And a secret identities setting works so well with the potential themes of VRAINS as a stand-in for the internet and Blue Angel as an idol. Give me that Perfect Blue Satoshi Kon good stuff. Give me those themes about identity, and the different lives we live, outward and inward, online and offline.

This also helps Akira's character, because I think he would be much more interesting and relevantly positioned in the story if he stayed a SOL Technologies baddie. SOL Technologies has very little presence in season 1 despite being critical to the story. After Zaizen is replaced by an irrelevant clown, they don't do anything but send out mook AIs to get destroyed. By having a three-way standoff between Yusaku's squad, the Knights of Hanoi, and SOL Technologies, both Hanoi and SOL Technologies become more compelling. They've both got all the reason in the world to want to take down the other. Zaizen vs. Revolver or Spectre? That's good shit.

And don't get me started on how I would turn Revolver into a Secret Identities character.

[tizeline]

May I ask, what is Leo and Draxum's relationship like? Is it good? Neutral? Or bad?

Uhhhhh well it's not exactly perfect, but I would say it leans more towards good, Draxum and Leo do both genuinely care for each other. I know that in the most recent comics their relationship appears a bit... strained to say the least. Because it is. BUT you should know that this is the most strained their relationsip has ever been up to this point. The reason for that is that this is the first time Leo has really openly and completely gone against Draxum's orders, Leo has never been as much of a rule-follower as Raph or as dedicated to the cause as Mikey, but he generally tends to go along with whatever his father wants. So Leo actively working against his family is new territory for all of them, that paired with Draxum's stubborness and self-rightousness (which makes him quite bad at being diplomatic in this situation) just causes even more cracks in their relationship.

That being said, things weren't all sunshine and rainbows before this, there has been an underlying tension building between the two of them for years which also acts as fuel to the fire in their most recent disagreement. I've brought it up before (and I'm gonna keep bringing it up whenever it's relevant) but one of the biggest dilemmas Draxum is dealing with is his duties as a father clashing with his duties as the warrior alchemist who has tasked himself with saving all of yōkai-kind. He created the turtles to aid him in that task, because of that he puts a lot of time and effort into finding their unique strengths, their "use" for a lack of a better term, to focus on improving and perfecting. It's similar to in canon, Leo feels insecure about role on the team because he doesn't feel like he has a Specific Thing™ like his brothers do. Only this time, it's kinda reinforced by the way Draxum acts.

And listen, Draxum doesn't actually love any of his sons more or less based on their "use" to the team, he views them as his children first and his soldiers second. But regardless of whatever his internal feelings are, because he's so dedicated to the plan he ends up spending more time with helping Mikey and Raph perfect their specific skillsets while Leo has a tendency to get a little overlooked. So from Leo's point of view, he's convinced he's the least favorite child! Oopsie! So again, like in canon, he acts like a show-off in an effort to get attention and praise, which a lot of the time just ends up backfiring on him cuz it makes him appear impulsive and immature.

This is something that starts off as a relatively small problem that just keeps getting more and more serious the longer it goes unadressed. By the time of season 1 Leo has more or less accidentally cemented himself as the "class-clown" of the family, so when he tries to argue about Draxum's plan neither his dad or his brothers really take him seriously. It's just Leo being Leo again, no biggie, he'll get proven wrong like he always does and they can all have a laugh about it later! But verbally disagreeing with Draxum is one thing, the fact that Leo actually goes and takes direct action against his family in such an extreme way is completely new, and it definitely throws them off. So Leo's hurt that his family refuses to listen to him and his family is hurt because they feel like Leo betrayed them.

So overall... yeah things are pretty dire in the entire Draxum family right now, especially between Leo and Draxum. They ARE gonna reconcile though! Leo's insecure role in the family has been a problem that's been going ignored for years now and the situation boiling over is gonna force everyone to actually adress it. It'll take some time, but Leo and Draxum are gonna talk things out, despite everything they do love each other, they both want to get along, they just need time to figure out how to actually accomplish that lol.

[bonefall]

I personally like Thunder's prosthetic. Explained it to my friend (who does use a mobility device, a cane and wheelchair, and listens to me rant and infodump about BB) and they agreed, it's important to know that not every person needs what someone wants to give them. It's another example of "bad ableist person does a thing that hurts a disabled person because they are bad and ableist".

Clear Sky got Jagged Peak killed and would have killed Sunlit Frost! He would absolutely force his disabled son to be "normal" and present it like a privilege. "I wouldn't do this for anyone else, it's special, why don't you want to be helped?"

Thunder Storm should toss it in Clear Sky's face. (I would say toss it into the river but we do not pollute waterways in this house)

Thank you for telling me this, and tell your friend I'm thanking them too! If they have anything else to add please forward what they have to say

Since BB!DOTC tackles some of the heaviest topics in the entire series because its canon equivalent is so dark, I think very carefully about what I do here and how I show it. I take feedback on its sensitive aspects very seriously. If I'm understanding the criticism properly, it's that I should avoid stigmatizing prosthetics by making sure Thunder Storm's not the only one with it-- which he's not! And I'll add even more.

I don't want to avoid something only because it's uncomfortable if the topic is important, and my portrayal is respectful. Ableism IS uncomfortable! There are some situations where a prosthetic is not wanted! I think the rejection of this particular one is both a good opportunity to show a type of ableism and ALSO is very fitting for the characters.

In BB!Clear Sky's mind, the villain, he's fixing an old mistake. He can't admit that he got Jagged Peak killed or take REAL accountability for it (though he will, occasionally, apologize insincerely), but deep in his bones, he knows what he did was cruel. He'll never tell anyone this because he doesn't really cognate it himself, but Thunder Storm NEEDS to take his gift.

If Thunder doesn't take it, it blows a hole in his newest story. You see, throwing Jagged Peak out was All That Could Have Been Done back then. It was a Tragedy and he simply Made A Hard Choice. He regrets it very much, But You Have To Understand.

But now? Now? Well, behold. Look at what he's accomplished since the tragic death of his little brother. His cats are well-fed, cared for, and stable enough to make such incredible advancements. If only Jagged Peak had been able to hold on longer, if only he could be here now, I could fix him.

Just like I can (MAKE YOU JUST LIKE ME) fix you.

"Everything I've ever done is for Jagged Peak. For Fluttering Wing. For you." Thunder Sky is SPECIAL, but if he rejects any gift, tries to turn down the "privileges" offered to him, in an instant that becomes ungratefulness and arrogance. He both forces him to be special, and then leverages it against him if it's rejected. "Spoiled brat, doesn't appreciate what I've worked so hard to give him."

It all goes back to him and his own guilt. He can NEVER be wrong. He can't accept his family doesn't have to be "normal" or reflect his own ability. He won't see himself as a bully, let alone a murderer. It was never about his son's comfort or finding out what Thunder Storm wants or needs, it was about his own ego.

...All that said I'm still taking feedback if there's anything else I should keep in mind, or if anyone has a counter point, especially if you also have experience here.

(In the interest of having a link trail for posterity, here's the critique/call for feedback this is in response to)

[nobie]

I need to talk about Morgan Elsbeth and the connection to Thrawn. Along with some other questionable narrative choices Filoni has made with Thrawn.

I want to preface, this is not going to be a hating Morgan Elsbeth post nor hating on the actress or any bts production of her character. There is enough hate towards characters like this in this fandom and I will not be perpetuating that (take that negativity somewhere else). I only want this to be an open discussion on this part of Thrawn's story.

Morgan is a character that has been placed into Thrawn's canon timeline. She was not written in (everything is written obvs but let me explain). The distinction I want to make between those narrative ideas is, placing a character into a story means they are important in supporting the main character, but no one cares if they are replaced or removed from the story. Writing a character into the story means they are so important to the direct development of the mc, if they are replaced or removed it feels like a piece of that character is missing. Some examples for Thrawn would be Eli Vanto or Ar'alani. Morgan was removed from the story in the Ahsoka series and it didn't even effect Thrawn himself.

So why create this character and push a narrative that makes her seem like the most important part of the story? Like without her Thrawn wouldn't be able to get back to the galaxy? Thrawn is a genius, a warrior, and a survivor. He could've figure that out himself, or with the help of Ezra (an established character that the audience loves). Instead he's had to rely on Morgan.

This is where my qualm with Dave Filoni comes into play. I love Filoni's work he has created some of my favorite stories in the Star Wars franchise. But he does one thing that I despise. Ignores the work of amazing authors. In this case Timothy Zahn. I can't say for sure that he hasn't read the Ascendancy Trilogy or the Thrawn (2017) trilogy, but it feels like it when analyzing Filoni's characterization of Thrawn. If he did read those books or least consulted Zahn on them he would know Thrawn's true motives for what he does. He is a protector for the greater good. He goes against many higher powers to make the right choice, not the good or bad choices. He shows the characters around him time and time again that he will always do what is right even if it means his downfall. He is not a villain in his own story just himself, not good or bad, the one in the middle. He evolves, learns, observes, and understands things on a completely different level. And we only see a sliver of this characterization in Filoni's story. I understand the narrative built around Thrawn being the ultimate villain for the ghost crew because a good story like this should have an interesting dynamic between protagonist and antagonist. But the fact that you'd have to read his books to know who he is, is a clear indication to me that his novel characterization wasn't researched enough.

It also shows me that Filoni favors the legends version of Thrawn more. Especially with the inclusion of Pellaeon in Tales of the Empire and not Eli Vanto. Who could have easily been placed into that role. Although, he his Thrawn's aide he can and has done things like that for Thrawn.

Now in Tales of the Empire we see that he isn't the original creator of the TIE Defender. Trying to place Morgan into a characters story that is so beloved [Thrawn] feels so forced through this idea that she created the TIE Defender. Why would someone who is trying to get revenge for her people go to the Empire with an idea like this. If she is so angry why she is relying on someone else's power to get her revenge? And even when she got in the good graces of the Empire with Thrawn what came of it? The Defender project was ruined, shouldn't her allegiance to Thrawn be in ruin too. The deal they made implied she would get what she wanted, but she never did and was still loyal to him. Thrawn does have this quality about him though, you'd follow him off a cliff, the gravity in which he attracts people to his cause is so alluring. But that still doesn't explain where Morgans revenge story went. And in the end she really does feel like a character that can be replaced.

Trying to make a character that was placed into the story important to the audience does a disservice to the story as a whole. Thrawn has an established world of characters in the novels that are readily available to use in the narrative. So why aren't they in it? Eli especially in one I cannot ignore the absence of. From the moment Thrawn is found in exile Eli does not leave his side. Eli follows him into battle again and again. Even after realzing his initial career choice will amount to nothing now that Thrawn has taken over his duty in the Imperial Navy. Thrawn himself says "you hold my words in your hand, and their meanings," and although that was in relation to his survival with the Empire it still held true throughout the story. Eli is an extension of Thrawn, whatever is said to Eli is said to Thrawn and vise versa. So where is he?

(Ok that's all my ramblings for now. Hopefully this made sense. Feel free to leave your thoughts in the tags or replies. Thrawn was the first sw novel I read, I'm fiercely protective of him. So when his characterization is kinda ruined like this it upsets me. But I'm always excited to see him in any media and hear that silky voice of his, thank you lars.)

[sualne]

Sorry if you're already working on this but with Luffy in Croc dad what's his hobby?? Like he's the biggest ball of energy and I think if wasn't fighting wild animals as a kid he would vibrate into another dimension from lack of stimulation. Does he draw and develop his art skills, has he taken up music or is he invested with the void century with Robin? Croc wants to keep him inside and safe so what did he think would be best to entertain him or does he buy a new thing every week that Luffy says he suddenly wants to do. Yes he looks at books but is that it. Also sorry if you answered this before and I've missed waht you said, I am pretty sure I've seen all your comics on this but I haven't seen all your ask answering questions.

i hadn't gotten these questions and im so glad you ask!! :D

so! luffy doesn't have one specific hobby and croc does end up giving him whatever he wants when he suddenly gets a new obsession, one of the reason he's so excited with finding the jewelry box and getting a dagger is because it's finally something new! after that he gets really into rings and knives until it gets bored of it and switch to something else again.

about him and learning about the void century with robin i actually got a comic later for that so i won't say anything here!

im going to make this a list and explain how it goes, under read more:

Fighting: this luffy doesn't know how to fight, but he still love the concept! he gets really excited hearing stories of fights, duels, martial arts and all the rest! In practice though, since he's been so sheltered and only ever saw one real fight that ended up with people being killed in front of him as a kid, if (haha) he were to witness another real fight he wouldn't be as giddy about it as when he hears stories. he does also learn the tiniest bit of kenpo from bonclay!

Dancing: luffy in canon loves dancing (and partying), here too! he doesn't know/master any specific styles but likes to drag people into dancing with him, if no one is around he'll grab some of the smaller bananawani instead.

Singing: he's still very bad at it.

Music: croc noticed how he'd taps on thing and tried to get him to learn some percussion, unfortunately for him, luffy doesn't care about music theory and just does whatever makes him happy. he also love loud noises and croc has to find a way to stop him from making a racket at any hours of the day, it gets worse when luffy loses some of his hearing and needs to make everything even louder. eventually he gets bored of it too.

Cooking: him and croc cooks together pretty often, if no one is there to supervise him luffy will ignore recipes and common sense, making all kind of abominations. it's a miracle he never set the kitchen on fire.

Bugs: he loves them! he collect them! alive. croc is horrified one day when he finds out baby luffy has been letting some food to rot so he could observes flies and larvae going through their little bug lives cycle. later croc gives him those pinned dead bugs collection boxes thinking luffy will like it, he doesnt.

Board&Cards Games: he mostly has to play them by himself, he doesn't like being alone so he'll often ends up playing it "with" the banawanis. after he loses a few too many times against the banawanis and can't get croc to join in for the millionth time he gives up on them. even when robin joins baroques works he still expect her to be too busy to play with him and doesn't ask (she would have accepted if he had asked).

Art&Craft: he tries a bit of everything, doing it his own way meaning most of it is kind of hideous or about to fall apart, canon luffy is completely fine with that, au luffy though, he's having ton of fun at first but when he gets old enough to see that his dad cant quite fake his enthusiasm or interest towards his disastrous creations he gets frustrated and stops for a while. later, robin finds an old drawing of his and thinks its cute so he start doodling a little again for her.

basically, he struggles keeping a hobby, some like fighting, dancing, bugs and staring at pictures in geography books he keeps through his life but mostly, he's very lonely and bored out of his mind, he's depressed, that's not something that can be helped for as long as he's isolated.

when robin becomes a part of his life everything gets better for him! she spends time with him, read stories for him, helps him get out more often, they even meet bonclay and for a few years he's genuinely happy.

[whoruntheworld-lesbians]

Dovesso Headcanons Because I Said So

--Dovey stresses about everything being perfect and right because she really does love the school so much and Lesso just. Makes fun of her for it but with that fond smile she can't quite hide and those concerned eyes that guide Dovey to her bed for some much needed sleep and for the first time in weeks Dovey breathes.

--Lesso is actually super clumsy. She's learned grace over the years, it is quite threatening after all, but she still randomly knocks things over and Dovey absolutely delights in it

--Dovey loves the song Cinderella Snapped by Jax, though she could never tell anyone since it basically goes against everything she teaches. But then Unification happens and she hesitantly shares it with Agatha one day. The next she walks through The Clearing and a group of kids are screaming the lyrics and dancing, laughing and smiling and finally free and she almost breaks down sobbing.

--One time Dovey bopped Lesso's nose and it was the first times Dovey had ever actually seen her look surprised. Lesso blinked for a second and then continued on as normal, but she seemed particularly absentminded the next day. (This totally doesn't kinda come from Pipsqueak. Where would you get that idea from 🤔)

--Lesso's a total potions geek. This is basically canon at this point but still. Dovey found out when they were scoping out The Blue Forest to replenish the herbs stock and she made some offhand comment about what that weird speckly plant might do and Lesso just lit up and went on a total rant about every which way it can be used.

--Now Dovey loves to sit it in the potions lab and just watch her lovely work as she sweeps around the room, completely in her element. Until Lesso inevitably knocks something over and lets out a string of some impressively creative profanity and Dovey cackles

--Dovey got it in her head once to try and tame Lesso's hair and they lost several brushes to that endeavor

--They're favorite thing to do is take a bath together. Long and lazy and pure heaven in a tub. Until the inevitable frantic voice of Hort outside the door screaming about the latest disaster. Dovey just smiles and shakes her head, magicking them dressed and ready, while Lesso grumbles about retirement for the third time that day. She'll be ninety two and still working there, grumbling all the same, and they both know it.

--At their wedding, Dovey brought a a step stool to the alter so she could finally lean down and kiss the beautiful bride

--Lesso wore the most awesome half suit with a jagged veil I mean I can't even describe it to you but trust me it's awesome.

--Anemone walked Dovey down the aisle because come on. It's just too perfect.

--August Sader walked Lesso down the aisle because they're gay besties and he deserved to exist in the movie don't even argue with me on this one

[redrandomposts]

guys im a genius(???)

(sentient-robot!hc x mechanic/engineer!xl)

-guoshi teaches xie lian mechanical things, and it all leads to xie lian creating a robot

-at first, he disliked it, and would rather train. however, he fell in love with his biggest project; a robot named hong-er

-the robot is small, powered by spiritual energy; it looks like a ten-year old child, with a bandage wrapped around an eye as xie lian crafted it with a coral pearl and rubies

-(a small soul, hating the world, never having gotten to leave its home, happens upon the coral pearl. it attaches to it, partly for the fact that it's read and partly because it's worth more than his family could ever earn)

-when xie lian completes the robot, pushing in the eye, it's as if he gained life. he has the understanding of a ten year-old, and stuck to his creator

-guoshi attempts to destroy and get rid of the robot after seeing it, but xie lian is firm in keeping him

-("am i a monster?" "no. don't you think that i could never create a monster?" "...but he said that-" "hong-er. you aren't a monster. i swear it.")

-feng xin and mu qing are put off, and warn xie lian against it

-("but even guoshi is weary of it!" "guoshi just doesn't know him! guoshi insisted i didn't let mu qing stay, but i did. hong-er did nothing wrong. i spent days working on him, and now you want me to get rid of him?" "your highness-")

-when xie lian ascends, he takes the robot with him to heaven and keeps him in the palace, because feng xin and mu qing strongly opposed of it. thus, not a single soul except for xie lian (and the robot) knew he was there.

-hong-er utilizing the qi in heaven, is able to grow. xie lian encourages this, and even creates new parts for him.

-time skip!!!

-(hong-er abandons his body in a cave to get his bone ashes, but is later unable to get it after being caught and sold

-hong-er attempts to stop xie-lian from going to the shrine, but is unable to. he becomes a wrath and goes back to get his body and ashes.)

-xie lian doesn't recognize him. because being a wrath gives an influx of energy he didn't previously have, the robot grew into a seventeen-year old from a fourteen year-old in just a moment.

-xie lian dubs him wu ming, and he accepts it gracefully.

-wu ming leaves the body in a hurry to get to dianxia faster, and is only just able to make it to the sword in time. he disperses and collects back into the coral eye that he first grew attached to.

-xie lian never finds out what happened to the robot.

-in mount tonglu, hua cheng often carves statues of dianxia, leaving a place for his robot body. he never carves himself, but often leaves the robot in a spot to simply take in the scene.

-timeskip!

-hua cheng keeps the robot body in his manor, laying in bed. the robot still has both eyes, unlike him, and was stuck in the state he had been as wu ming, before his dispersal

-xie lian ascends as a mechanical scrap god - making useless robots out of scrap

-hua cheng, who had to upkeep his body for centuries, is intimate with the knowledge. they get on just fine

-xie lian finds out everything. about how when hua cheng was young, his parents decided to abandon him, how he was tormented by kids and bled out. how his soul found the coral pearl, and how he became the robot. how he was wu ming.

-idk man i don't really stray from canon i really should though

notes!

-coral pearl is central respawn point for hua cheng. when he disperses the second time, xie lian hangs the pearl on his necklace, next to the ring, waiting for hua cheng

-feng xin, mu qing, and guoshi all refer to hong-er as "it," while xie lian refers to hong-er as "him." they don't call hua cheng "it," unless they want xie lian on their asses.

-points this can stray from canon: hong-er isn't seperated from xie lian, and is instead destroyed by white no-face after he has a hard time trying to get rid of him; wu ming brings the mechanical body to lang-er bay, and xie lian discovers it after the fight and who wu ming really was; hua cheng, encumbered by the body, is stuck as a robot god of some sort

anyways have a good day my delusions are getting worse

[akiizayoi4869]

(tw emotional neglect, abuse)

(I say this as a person that actually thinks positively of Ursa)

"Ursa wasn't a bad mom, she was simply trying to stop Azula from doing bad stuff" You know that statement isn't incompatible with 'Ursa is an emotionally neglectful parent' right? Especially when there's very little evidence of Ursa doing anything other than stopping Azula from doing bad things?

Another argument that bothers me is 'Azula knew deep down her mother loves her, that's why she hallucinated her.' Sorry, but that's not how feeling unloved by your parents worked. I would know. There is actually evidence of Ursa loving Azula, but the hallucination is not it.

A third arguement: "You're just projecting your mom issues on her" Ursa's a lot nicer and a better parent than my mom. And Ursa's more like my dad.

"It actually was all Ozai" It's possible, but we don't really know. They never did actually show us enough of Ursa and Azula's relationship to tell (and no, we can't just assume based on what happened in the comics/show, especially since they only showed a few days). Did Ozai tell Azula that her mom thought she was a monster? Or did Ozai just say things that Azula interpreted as such? Did Ursa actually even say Azula was a monster? Was Ursa a really bad parent off screen? Did Azula get this impression from Ursa actually disciplining her (as the common belief goes)? Did Ursa do things that gave Azula the impression that she thought she was a monster (there is actually enough evidence for this, considering Spirit Temple and the common belief that Ursa saw Ozai in Azula. And. You know. Ursa does think Ozai is a monster.). We don't know either way.

"Azula was just spoiled" Also not incompatible with emotional neglect.

"Ursa was as bad as Ozai" 100% WRONG.

"Ursa abandoned her kids" Yes and no. She was forced to leave (not the same thing). The forgetting of her kids could be interpreted that way, though. Personally, I see the 'forgetting her kids' more as a moment of weakness-not necessarily an indication of her feelings on Azula and Zuko (whom she interacts with positively after she regains her memories). Like she was so overwhelmed by the pain, and she didn't know if she'd see Azula or Zuko again. So she took the chance to forget. If it had been a better moment, or she was in a better mental state/had more hope that she'd see Zuko or Azula again, or was given a chance to not forget Azula and Zuko while forgetting everything else, she probably wouldn't have chosen to forget.

Omg, the hallucination argument and the "it was all Ozai!" arguments annoy me the most. Why are we taking what a hallucination says at face value? This is all coming from Azula's mind, that's why it's called a "hallucination" what the hallucination of Ursa was saying were all things that Azula wanted her mother to say to her, but knew that she wouldn't. Why? Because Ursa never showed that she loved Azula. If she did, Azula wouldn't have hallucinated her mother, the one person who she wanted comfort from in that moment, and she wouldn't have cried when hallucination Ursa said "I love you, Azula. I do." and smashed the mirror with her hair brush. She did that because she knew that Ursa wasn't really there, and because she knew that her mother would never say those comforting words to her. Based on what we saw in the Zuko Alone episode, Ursa was always strict with Azula in ways that she wasn't with Zuko, even when he did something that was bad. Like it or not, that leaves an impression on your kid. That makes them think that you don't love them, only your sibling.

Yeah, we really don't know much about their relationship, and I wouldn't even take the comics interpretation (at least, the Yang comics) because they completely contradict what little bit we saw in the show. Saying it was all Ozai and that Ursa had nothing to do with Azula's problems is just deliberately denying canon. The Beach episode gave us this:

and nobody says anything to push back against that statement and say that Azula was wrong, and that of course her mother didn't see her as a monster or thought that about her. You know what that means? They knew that she was right, because they were all around each other during their childhood. So they all witnessed how Ursa treated both of her kids. Zuko most likely didn't care because his mom was on his side when his father wasn't, but Mai and Ty Lee were Azula's friends. You can't tell me that they didn't pick up on it after a while, even if Azula didn't openly talk about it. And then we have the mirror scene. Once again, the narrative doesn't do anything to show that Azula was wrong. The hallucination is there for one reason: to show us that yes, what Azula said during The Beach episode actually isn't a wrong assessment of the relationship between her and her mother at all, and that she really did not feel as if Ursa loved her, because Ursa never showed that she did. Now, I'm not saying that Ursa did not love Azula at all, because I'm sure that she did. She just never acted or spoke to Azula in a way that conveyed that she did indeed love her.

Personally, I don't think that Azula got this impression from Ursa disciplining her. That's expected of a parent. However, it's the way how Ursa went about doing it that counts. With Zuko, we see Ursa lightly admonish him for doing something wrong, and gently explaining to him why whatever it was that he did was wrong. I'm pretty sure that there was more moments like that, and Azula more than likely witnessed them. Compare that with how Ursa spoke to Azula whenever she did something wrong, and you get a completely different picture. Ursa just yells at Azula and doesn't explain why whatever it was that she did or said was wrong, as if she just expected Azula to know better. Which is just baffling to me since Azula is the youngest child. In my experience, the youngest child tends to need a bit more guidance than the oldest child does. Anyway, Azula quite obviously picked up on this difference and it resulted in her beginning to think that something was wrong with her since Ursa never treated Zuko like that.

Another thing is attention. Not receiving attention from your parents will also mess you up. It's even worse when it's the mother since, you know, you have that special connection with her since she carried you for nine months. Getting attention from your parents is important. And while I know that people say that Ozai gave attention to Azula, that's different. And I honestly wouldn't even call that good attention, because all he cared about was results and how useful his children were to him. Also, Ozai wasn't the loving parent in the family. Ursa was. Azula knew this because, as we can clearly see, she was a smart child for her age, and she wasn't naive like her brother. So to her, not being loved by Ursa, the loving parent in the family, must mean that she's the problem. Which is why she sees herself as a monster, and why she thinks Ursa saw her as a monster.

Miss me with the whole "Ursa was just as bad as Ozai or worse than him" bs. Like you said that is absolutely not true at all.

I mean yes, that was the whole point of Ursa choosing to forget her children. I just have two problems with it: originally she was just going to change her face so that she wouldn't be recognized, and find a way to go back to her children. The only reason why she changed her mind was because Ikem convinced her to. Secondly, once again it goes against what we saw in the show, because what does she tell Zuko right before she leaves? "Never forget who you are." And then she proceeds to do exactly that. It was just a stupid and lazy plot point to explain what happened to Ursa, because the writers didn't think that much about it.

[wrongcaitlyn]

wrongcaitlyn masterlist

decided to make this for anyone coming from greatest of luxuries or new to my works in general, in case anyone wants to check out my other stuff! my ao3

my name's tawny (not caitlyn, lmao, that's actually from caitlyn kiramman from arcane), i use she/her pronouns, and i write pjo and marauders fics!

asks are open, i love rambling abt any of these fics (or general fandom stuff) <3

i currently have one main wip that i'm working on:

the greatest of luxuries (is your secrets): solangelo, part of the dear reader series, popstar!nico, and a sequel to talk your talk. updates every sunday!

other ongoing wip's:

checkmate, i couldn't lose: solangelo, hs/nerds/academic rivals (sort of) au, road trip with lots of fluff

i can fix him (woah, maybe i can't): solangelo, renegades au (so like, superheroes and villains), enemies to lovers (sort of) + secret identities

and several completed fics (both multi-chaps and one-shots)!

PJO COMPLETED FICS

dear reader series - popstar au - talk your talk and go viral (i just need this love spiral) - 34 ch, 145k words, solangelo - still hoping that the fire won't burn me (just one time) - one-shot, 11.1k, valgrace - forever going with the flow (but you're friction) - 2 ch, 17.1k words, fierrochase - you don't need to save me (but would you run away with me) - one-shot, 6k words, shelper - still look at you (like the stars that shine) - one-shot, 7.4k words, rachel

keep your eyes open series - hunger games au - staying on guard (every lesson forms a new scar) - 6 ch, 40.2k words, solangelo, MCD - i've got a lot to pine about (a lot to live without) - one-shot, 2.2k words, solangelo/will solace-centric, graphic depictions of violence, psychological torture

because i'm a mirrorball series - will solace-centric, canon-verse - i've never been a natural (all i do is try, try, try) - one-shot, 10k words, will solace from pre-tlt to botl, not tsats compliant (written before that was released and my own version of will solace lore) - i'm still a believer (but i don't know why) - one-shot, 9.2k words, will solace from botl to tlo, not tsats compliant, canonical MCD - when i break, it's in a million pieces - one-shot, 1.7k words, will solace-centric, battle of manhattan aftermath, all canon/tsats compliant - i'm still tryin' everything (to get you laughing at me) - one-shot, 3.5k words, solangelo from ttc to end of boo, mostly tsats compliant - i'm still on my tallest tiptoes (shinin' just for you) - one-shot, 2k words, solangelo during toa, all canon/tsats compliant - all along there was some invisible string (tying you to me) - one-shot, 1.3k words, solangelo pre-toa, missing scene that's referenced in tsats (their first kiss), all canon/tsats compliant

god, i'm actually invested (haven't even met him) - one-shot, 5.7k words, solangelo au where nico goes to camp jupiter after the giant war instead of staying at camp half-blood, and will meets him years later when going to new rome university

so american - one-shot, 9.6k words, solangelo fame au (country singer will & actor nico)

let's go (battle royale) - one-shot, 7k words, solangelo fortnite streamers au, lots of references to the greek gods-themed season

on a wednesday in a cafe - one-shot, 2.3k words, solangelo college/coffee shop au, an absurd amount of taylor swift song references

like i'd be saved by a perfect kiss - one-shot, 1.1k words, aroace reyna-centric during toa, reyna's pov of rejecting apollo

i'm a mess (but i'm the mess that you wanted) - one-shot, 5.1k, solangelo arcane/timebomb au, nico as jinx and will as ekko but canon divergent from what actually happens in arcane (you don't need to watch arcane to understand it though)

midnights become my afternoons - one-shot, 3.3k words, aroace leo-centric on the argo II, with a bit of leo & nico friendship, canon compliant

ARCANE COMPLETED FICS

dream of some epiphany - one-shot, 1.7k words, caitlyn character study, her thoughts after she takes out the knife in the fight against ambessa and then after the battle

MARAUDERS COMPLETED FICS

reputation (regulus' version) series - celebrity au - starry eyes (sparking up my darkest night) - 16 ch, 113k words, regulus as rep era taylor swift au, james as joe, marauders as a band, background wolfstar and dorlene - baby, let the games begin - one-shot, 1.7k words, bonus chapter to starry eyes, jegulus (in between chapters 15 and 16)

clear blue waters (high tide came and brought you in) - 7 ch, 32.1k words, jegulus cruiseship au, background wolfstar and lots of teenager tonks, very fluffy

and one on hiatus!

may these memories break our fall: jegulus/wolfstar, percy jackson au, and follows the quest of heroes of olympus.

OTHER COMPLETED FICS

- overdue for a revival - one-shot, 8.6k words, harry potter au where charlie weasley becomes the comc professor in poa

[silvyslayer42]

saiki k headcannons (very very long post)

-kurumi + kuusuke have weird unnaturally sharp teeth that are lowkey scary if you look at them for too long. kusuo also has it but he hides it.

-if you think at kusuo, he can hear you no matter where you are. the psychickers (+ his family) know this and use it against him.

-kusuo is an unwilling empathy crier. if someone starts crying near him, he will at least start to tear up. he finds it an extreme inconvenience and does everything he can to hide it. this only really happens with people in his direct vicinity though, so no movie characters or random people in his telepathy radius.

-too many characters have similarly colored eyes, so here’s a lightning round with some eye color changes

akechi: periwinkle. it just makes sense to me ok?? a silly color for a silly goober. it grows on me more the more i think about it.

aren: dark magenta with a hint of red. i think it represents his personality better

toritsuka: dark grey. i like it and have no explanation for it. honorable mention goes to pink because it makes him match with saiki

also aiura has neon yellow eyes not green they are not green her eyes are not gre

-kusuo gets a pretty normal amount of sleep all things considered, in fact he probably gets maybe an hour or so more than average most nights because he just loves sleeping so much. kuusuke does not even go out of his way to get a bed for himself because the only sleep he gets is when he forgets to take his bi-hourly injection of whatever he’s using in place of caffeine and passes out on top of whatever he’s working on for ≈3 minutes before jolting himself awake and going back to work. if he really has to nap for whatever reason he claims the floor is plenty comfortable.

-kusuo has sedatephobia (fear of silence). while the peaceful tranquility of putting people’s thoughts on mute with the ring is nice, if he were to somehow be put into a situation with no noise at all or even just very little noise I think he’d be pretty freaked. he’s never had a truly quiet moment before, so it’s only a natural reaction to be uncomfortable with it. he would avidly deny it if asked though, even if he gets visibly anxious from it.

-kuusuke has never used bugs against kusuo directly because he thinks phobias are a cheap and uncreative tactic. the birthday card thing doesn’t count because that was only psychometry images.

-it’s not really a psychic power but all of the pk psychics have extremely strong intuitions. like they just Know things sometimes. this is basically canon for at least kusuo but that besides the point. the jury is still out on whether akechi also has the psixth sense or if he’s just weird but he is definitely on the same page as everyone else most of the time because of his near psychic analysis of his situation and surroundings

-kusuo can use transform on other people but it never comes up bc why would he do that when hypnosis is so much easier? something something genderbend episode

-kusuo had a very bad no good week like right before he got his limiters where his hair became uncuttable and he was forced to have a mullet until it culminated in kusuo willing himself into developing heat vision and cutting his hair with it to mixed results.

-each of the saiki’s think they’re the more normal one balancing out the rest of the family’s weirdness but no. all of you are weird there is no balance

-more of an opinion than a headcanon, but being average/“normal” was never really what saiki wanted. what he’s actually after is peace, and he just happens to associate those things with it. that’s why he changed the world to perceive his unusual attributes as normal when he was younger instead of changing himself to appear normal, what he truly wants is a world that he can be himself in and be at peace at the same time. the reason he refuses to admit this, even to himself, is because of his own lack of self-acceptance. you guys don’t understand he’s such an angsty and tragic character actually ! a poor little meow meow even ! listen to me !!

-kusuo and kuusuke NEED to have a “let’s take ibuprofen together” moment i will not be explaining further

-kuusuke works above board a lot, but he is definitely doing some “under the table” stuff when it comes to selling the shit he makes because he just does not care and wants money to fund his games. he is confident he will never get caught and even if he’s wrong kusuo is reversing that shit to avoid the trouble it would cause him.

-kuusuke does love robotics (specifically with making weapons but he does indulge in the gadget or two), and that is definitely his favorite to do stuff with and the thing he is most passionate about, but don’t be fooled, he does everything. any science under the sun and he is probably an expert on it. special mentions of things he knows a lot a lot about go to neuroscience, physics, biology, first aid/general medicine, pharmacology (technically canon because of that muscle relaxent from the cattank arc) and anything that you could realistically make a psi pun with.

-sometimes kuusuke randomly decides that a random ass guy is the person of the week he wants to piss off (to him it’s like being annoying to an animal, very amusing ^^). positive things about this: it’s normal a really bad person he decides to be a menace to like a rich guy or a corrupt politician. bad things about this: he has had to deal with hired hits on him before

-aiura can get a very accurate read on someone’s personality near instantly and has an encyclopedic knowledge on everyone. she knows your birthday and she knows what you want. teruhashi too but not because she’s psychic she’s just also weird.

-aiura has a very bad sleep schedule because she gets woken up in the middle of the night by visions of disaster. this is NOT THE SAME as kusuo’s visions !! kusuo is tormented in his sleep, she is kept awake. aiura also sometimes has visions of shit right before it happens and if it’s a bad thing she has to think quick on her feet to stop it.

-aiura does not stop helping people she just gets a little bit better at being discreet. eventually she goes freelance and owns her own shop for occult stuff good for her

ok that’s all i got for now. tune in whenever i decide to do this again for more bangers

[kurithedweeb]

For Drop of Sunlight, what's your take on the relationship between the Divine Warriors and Aphmau/her guards (Garroth, Katelyn, Laurance, Dante)

That’s a bit of a tricky one for me. I don’t remember a whole lot about the Divine Warriors from canon since I haven’t finished my rewatch, and I haven’t explored them that much because we’re still real early on and they haven’t become majorly relevant yet, but I think I can scrounge up a few ideas. We’re gonna talk about the Divine Warriors as a whole and not each individual for now.

The Divine Warriors were all friends, but Irene was what connected them. They were all drawn to her, all loyal to her above anyone else, they were . . . the term I want to use for the Divine Warriors is ‘a cult polycule,’ but that doesn’t really explain and also is probably wrong. Let’s rewind a bit.

Irene killed the Divine Warriors as a whole. Before they ever met her, Irene had lived for so, so long as this being more powerful than the rest of her race and everyone put her on a pedestal. Her power left her so isolated, so completely alone, that everything she did had to be perfect because she didn’t have anyone to fall back on when she failed anymore, not since she’d outlived her sister. Everything Irene did became just another duty she had to perform and she stopped feeling alive. Until Shad.

Shad was the first person she’d ever met that was anywhere near as powerful as her. Suddenly she wasn’t so alone anymore, and she clung to Shad for fear that if she let him slip away she’d be alone again for who knows how long. She nudged their relationship from enemies to friends to, eventually, lovers. Shad loved her because she seemed so good and she wasn’t afraid of him and with her he could have what he always wanted: someone to love and a family. I’m a little iffy on whether or not Irene was actually in love with him, but in those times being someone’s lover was seen as the absolute closest you could be to someone and you couldn’t really get a marriage annulled. Once they were together-together Irene thought she could never lose Shad.

For a while, it was Irene and Shad against the world. The rest of the Divine Warriors came after. They were all good people who had some kind of power, a power that Irene could help them foster into something they could use for the greater good. They became friends by virtue of spending a ton of time together and working to become a team because they realized their different dynamics and abilities actually meshed well, but above that they were always Irene’s most devout followers right up until they were shown by Irene herself that she wasn’t as good as everyone thought. I mean, if God-God were your personal friend, wouldn’t you be a believer too?

Everything fell apart after the relics were made. After they return home for the first time in ages, Shad goes looking for their daughter, so excited to see her sweet smile, only to not be able to find her anywhere. And when he goes to ask Irene for help looking for their baby girl, he’s told that she’s been in his relic the entire time, that it was her soul that had been used to form Shad’s weapon. Shad is obviously heartbroken, demanding to know why she would do such a thing, but Irene can’t understand that what she did was wrong. She can’t even fathom it. In her eyes, having their daughter was nowhere near as important as having Shad, because he’s the only equal she’s ever known and nobody else even compares. She’s struck dumb and feels incredibly betrayed when Shad turns against her because she’s been under the impression that, since they’re the same, he felt exactly the way she did. If she can’t have him, though, then at least she still has the rest of the Divine Warriors; they love her, they worship her, they’d never betray her like this.

Except Shad was one of their own. They hesitate for just a second when she says Shad’s turned against them and is an enemy, but it’s Irene so she can’t be wrong, right? But as the days stretch on they start to realize that Shad only wants to hurt Irene and he’s got a damn good reason for it. By the time they recognize that Irene is bad guy here, it’s too late. Instead, the Divine Warriors shatter Shad’s relic so it can’t be given to anyone else, so it can’t help turn this into a cycle and scatter the fragments, then disappear to build their temples. By the time they reconnect, ready to hear Irene out, Irene’s disappeared.

The stuff with the guards is way more specific.

When Anastasia (Aphmau) first appears, Garroth doesn’t pay her much mind. He’s got enough to worry about and she’s not hurting anyone, just kind of dipping in and out of town every once in a while. Then he realizes that she’s been fixing up the village and helping people out. She’s a very kind woman in a time when most people can’t afford to be kind, and fairly protective of Phoenix Drop despite not really living there or being close to its citizens. But she’s also fairly reckless with her own life and, despite knowing just about every trade there is, doesn’t actually know much about the world she lives in. Garroth is her protector first, then they become something maybe like friends, and he only develops feelings for her after she’s already started settling into her position as Lord. He shoves these feelings real deep down though and never makes a solid effort to act on them, it’d be improper considering their positions and cloud his judgement more than it already has. It’s enough that he can be her friend, that he can see that she’s happy, that he can be close to her and help her through whatever she needs him for. He probably gives her lessons about Lord stuff.

I’m debating where I should put Laurance and Anastasia’s first meeting, because I really like the idea of what they had going in Rebirth where Laurance first saw her when she was at her most frantic, but in the OG meeting he first sees her as someone who’ll go out of their way to fix their mistakes. Either way, it’s love at first sight for this sucker because he’s the kind of person who falls in love at the drop of a hat and who loves nearly everybody he comes across. He flirts because that’s the way he learned to talk to people who make him nervous and he’s only serious about it until he gets rejected, after which it’s just fun between friends. They’re amazing friends, partially because they’re on the same wavelength about a lot of things, partially because of trauma bonding. As time goes on, he gradually becomes more protective of and devoted to Anastasia as a Lord and he’s very serious about her personal safety. Laurance is always the one Garroth sends to negotiate with Anastasia about protective measures when she leaves the village since he always manages to convince her to take at least one of them along.

Dante’s conflicted about how he feels about Anastasia because he thinks of her like a sister. He has so many emotions about this, including feeling just a little bit guilty about it. He sees her as kind-hearted, adventurous, and always good for cheering someone up. It’s easy to joke around with her and playfight during training sessions. He trusts her implicitly, feels like he can confide in her about anything. He’s wary about feeling like this after what happened with his real sibling, especially towards his Lord of all people, but those worries mellow out after he gets to know Anastasia better.

Anastasia was already well-established as a Lord when Katelyn came into play, and they met in that time when Phoenix Drop couldn’t afford any political missteps so her first impression was that Anastasia was a regal leader who inspired a daunting level of loyalty in her guards and citizens and knew her way around doublespeak. She only realizes how prone she is to accidentally giving her guards heart attacks after she’s been turned to their side, and finds the startling difference between the real Anastasia and the Lordsona she presents to other villages hilarious. They’re also eventually good friends, she’s probably the first real friend Katelyn’s had in a long time, and Katelyn finds her easier to get along with than most of the other ladies at first because she’s gotten so used to interacting only with people in positions of power or the guards under their command since she was picked for the Jo9. They really bond during quiet moments travelling together. Having to trust your back to someone while you sleep in potentially hostile territory will do that for you.

I think a big difference between the relationships between Irene and the Divine Warriors and Anastasia with her guards is that Irene doesn’t feel anything, while Anastasia sometimes feels too much and that greatly affects the way they connect with people.

Another is that, nine times out of ten, Anastasia's guards would sacrifice their lives for her at the first hint of real danger. No one of the Divine Warriors would ever think to truly sacrifice themselves for Irene. What could possibly kill a goddess?

[kli-kli]

Any song can be curtwen-coded if you're delusional enough BUT for me, the most saf-related song will always be Working for a Knife by Mitski, and listening to it again roday hit me with a lot of thoughts and feelings.  Because 'working for a knife' itself means working towards something that will destroy you. It shows the correlation between what you have to do and what leads to your inevitable end. 

So, like, pre-canon espionage? Fits. Curt's return to the profession? Fits. Owen as a DMA? Fits!

It also fits Tatiana and her past, although she is the one who manages to get away from it (all the best for our girl <3).

I cry at the start of every movie I guess 'cause I wish I was making things too But I'm working for the knife I used to think I would tell stories But nobody cared for the stories I had about No good guys

It's about Curt and Owen pre-canon, when the work ceased to be what brought them together and began to get in the way (along with other factors) of their future together, or any future for that matter. Maybe it's the moment when Owen gets fed up with spying and starts to consider all the ways his life could have turned out if he'd made a different decision in the past. It's when he sees all the 'what ifs...' that never got a chance to become reality. Or maybe those are the short moments when Curt—the one who loves what he does because it's his dream and because it's cool as fuck—begins to see that it made his alcohol problem a little bit bigger and his wellbeing worse—even if he'll never admit it out loud.

It's the final realisation of what their end will be. They'll die on a mission at some completely unexpected moment. They're working for the knife — for something that will get them killed one day, without giving them any chance for a normal life together.

Tatiana, whose life has been marked by violence since childhood, who is thrown into this environment against her will, with no control over it. Until she finally manages to regain this control, but even then she cannot be fully free and is forced to act on behalf of her blackmailer. 

I always knew the world moves on I just didn't know it would go without me I start the day high and it ends so low 'Cause I'm working for the knife I used to think I'd be done by twenty Now at twenty-nine, the road ahead appears the same Though maybe at thirty, I'll see a way to change That I'm living for the knife

Curt is returning to his profession after four years of grief and stagnation, but despite taking that step, he is still in the same place, dwelling on what he did, when the whole world moved on like nothing happened. But eventually he goes back to being a spy, something Owen would have wanted for him. His healing journey can begin, right? Even if he's returning to something that was slowly destroying him in the past — things will be different now, right??

Owen is so committed to his revenge that it's impossible for him to move on completely (no matter what he says in the finale, like be for real). And of course, he has his goal, and everything will be fine once he achives it. But for that to happen, he has to work for another organisation. They can present themselves as a better alternative to government organisations all they want, but we don't know how they really treated Owen. But what we are sure of is that, at the end of the day, he ended up dead.  So, in the end, it is always dying for the knife, no matter which one. 

I always thought the choice was mine And I was right, but I just chose wrong I start the day lying and end with the truth That I'm dying for the knife

So maybe going with Chimera's plan was the biggest mistake. Or maybe 'the knife' was just his relationship with Curt all along. Maybe in his mind that was the wrong choice that he made, that got him killed twice.

And Curt, during his grieving period, tried to pull himself together, get out of alcoholism, and move on. But that strong resolve to get back on his feet came every morning, only to disappear every evening, when he no longer had the strength to lie to himself that things would get better. And Curt post-canon, who gradually, more and more clearly, sees that he cannot destroy Chimera alone and that attempting to do so by himself was not the best choice.

Or maybe the worst choice was killing Owen on that staircase. 

[theicarusconstellation]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love ❤

HI MY SUNSHINE

and though i burn, how could i fall?

No touch has felt like this before. No touch was as caring, as tender, holding Regulus like he is something precious.

Precious.

To a god.

Will you sing for me?

or, my jegulus icarus x apollo au

your life begins by leaving (and our love is stored in the letting go), cowritten with my beautiful fiancé kit @ninety-two-bees

Regulus came and went in the blink of an eye, and James kept wishing.

At some point, though, wishing stopped being enough. James could sit around and lament to his friends about what could’ve been, but it didn’t change what was. The wedding announcement was what finally tipped James over the edge. He couldn’t keep waiting and hoping that things would work themselves out for him. He couldn't keep worrying about giving Regulus his space. If he was going to lose the only person he had ever truly wanted to build a future with, he had to at least try to change how things played out. He had to know for certain if he had any chance to be with Regulus at all.

or, james and regulus go on a roadtrip

into the dark

His curls are swept delicately over the side of his face, and when James brushes them away, they reveal his marble skin dotted with near-invisible freckles, spattered across his cheekbones and the little bump on his nose. James wants everything about him: how his Cupid’s bow dips into a perfect little heart, his lips, smooth and rose-red, the soft rustling of his curls against the pillow as he exhales, his hands, slim fingers resting against the mattress, donned in the rings he wore to the Gryffindor party.

Regulus is more than just angel-like; he is a boy from Heaven itself.

or, my jegulus canon-divergent au spanning both wars

into the stars

“Happy Valentine’s Day, baby,” James murmurs into his hair.

“Baby? That’s a new one,” Regulus replies, praying to all that is holy that James can’t feel how hot his cheeks burn at the use of the pet name. Baby, baby, baby.

or, a little fic set in the into the dark universe written for my fiancée, @ninety-two-bees

with a broken heart, the transformation begins

Do you know what it feels like to witness the end of the world?

It does not happen with a bang, nor with a whimper, but rather a twisted combination of both.

Centuries of preparation and training are not enough, though you can hope and hope and hope until your feathers fall out that they will be.

There is no hope as you stand on the edge of a grassy hill and watch as the most ancient and powerful of evils tears through space to destroy everything you hold dear.

Do you know what it feels like to fail?

or, my revali character study — a description of his death

little universes

a collection of my tumblr jegulus microfics (@theicarusconstellation), updated continuously with each new prompt i write for.

always an angel (never a god)

“Alia Atreides.”

Something shatters right beside the foot of the servant who holds the holo-communicator. The shards of Alia’s glass cup litter the stony ground.

“I’ll kill them,” Alia hisses, hints of the Voice seeping into her tone. “I’ll kill them all.”

In the chaos, no one bothers to observe Emperor Shaddam as he moves on to the next Reaping Bowl.

Paul knows what is coming. He would know even if the emperor never read the name on that slip.

“Paul Atreides.”

or, my dune hunger games au, set in the dune universe

gun in my lips

hidden because it’s being rewritten, but it’s my jegulus and lilycissa the secret history au

cela en valait-il la peine? (ça l’était)

"Wormy was here last weekend, I thought he seemed down, but that was probably the news about the McKinnons; I cried all evening when I heard."

or, marlene goes out kicking and screaming with her lover on her mind and ferocity in her heart

[baby-yongbok]

Poetry

Chapter Six - Mr.H

Hyunjin x Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff with a swirl of angst

Summary: The night that you see Hyunjin again after your date is full of surprises. You can keep your cool but can he?

Word Count: 5,407

A/N: Things are happening, ya'll. I'm so excited to be back in Fan Fiction land <3 + If you haven't already, I highly recommend reading the previous parts before this one so that you get the ✨full experience✨. See you next Thursday at 6 💕

Part Five

✧Poetry Series Masterlist✧

✧Main Masterlist✧

There wasn’t a moment of silence after Hyunjin left, you spent the entirety of your breakfast answering questions while giving Changbin and Serena as many details as you could before you had to leave for work. You will admit that you appreciate how involved your friends are, especially Changbin. You were almost afraid that he was going to go full big brother mode and quiz Hyunjin the moment that he met him but he actually kept his cool, let’s see how it goes next time. 

Speaking of next time, you haven’t seen Hyunjin since your date. The two of you have been texting nonstop and you even spoke on the phone two days ago but neither of you have brought up a plan to meet. He canceled your meetup this week because he had to help his roommate Felix with something upstate. You weren’t mad about it though, you took the free time as an opportunity to look into a new hobby. 

You have a bit of a tradition that you started during your second year of university, every autumn you look into building a new skill or taking up a new hobby. You weren’t sure what to get into this year until you saw a flier on your way to work yesterday. Apparently your local community center has a photography club that meets on Fridays where you’re taught everything that you need to know by a professional. There’s no way that you could turn a blind eye to such a wonderful free opportunity. So here you are, walking through the large glass doors and into the quiet lobby. Your brand new Canon camera is placed safely in its case hanging from your shoulder and your tote bag is hanging from the other. You looked up at the digital board by the reception desk to look for the room number for your class. Once you found it you made your way down the hall, humming a smooth tune to try and calm your nerves. You were more than excited but you were almost positive that the club would be filled with experienced photographers looking for community and you are far from experienced.

The door to the room is already open when you reach the room and there are a few people in there talking amongst themselves and fiddling with their cameras. You enter quietly, not wanting to draw too much attention to yourself but that fails once you get half way into the room. The group swiftly looks up at you, each one of them studying your frame with furrowed brows and that’s when you notice the elephant in the room… they’re all teenagers.

“Hi, you must be new.” One of the girls breaks the silence. “I’m Mia.”

“Hi, I’m Y/n. Nice to meet you.” You move to sit by the window, right in the middle of the row. You never liked being too far from the instructor but you also hate being in the front. 

“I’m James and this is Olivia, she’s a bit shy.” One of the boys sitting against the wall introduces himself and the girl sitting on his lap. Olivia offers a timid wave before looking back down at her camera. You smile, waving back at her. 

“Leo, stop being rude. Say hi to the new girl.” Mia pushes the boy sitting in front of her and he curses at her quietly before turning to you and waving passive aggressively. You wave back silently as you try to hold back a chuckle.

“Leo is an asshole, don’t mind him.” Mia explains before glancing down at her phone. 

“Two minutes until Mr.H gets here.” James nods his head, only half paying attention as he looks past Mia and over to you, clearly itching to ask you a question.

“Am I crazy or are you the oldest one here?”

“Oh my god, what the hell, James.” Mia’s exasperated voice echoes through the room followed by Oliva’s laugh. 

“It’s an observation, fucking shoot me.” You chuckle a bit, nodding your head. 

“You’re not crazy, I’m probably about seven years older than you guys.” 

“Oh you’re about the same age as Mr.H” You pinch your brows together softly, you didn’t expect the teacher to be around your age. “Maybe we can hook you two up, he desperately needs a girlfriend.”

“What are you going on about, James?” You shift your attention towards the person speaking, that voice sounds so familiar and you realize why as soon as your eyes land on his figure coming through the door. Hyunjin is the teacher?

“I’m just trying to get you a girlfriend, Mr.H” You watch as Hyunjin walks over to the desk at the front of the classroom, he hasn’t looked up from the packet in his hands since he came through the door. You take a moment to admire him, he doesn’t look as dressed up as he usually does, he looks relaxed and cozy. You could get used to this look. 

“Why don’t you worry about perfecting your depth of field instead. You’re not here to get me a girlfriend.” Hyunjin smiles to himself as he leans against the desk, still focused on the paper in front of him. The others in the room immediately start laughing and making fun of James. 

“That’s what you get.” Mia laughs as she moves from sitting on top of the desk.

“Whatever, Y/n is way too pretty for you anyway.” You cover your mouth as you try to stifle a laugh. Hyunjin immediately looks up at the sound of your name, his brows furrowed in confusion.

“Excuse me?” Hyunjin asks before turning his head in your direction. He freezes for a second, his eyes glossing over your frame slowly to make sure that it’s really you. 

“Oh um you must be new.” He stands, pushing a hand into the pocket of his worn denim jeans and making his way over to you. 

“Yeah I am.” You grin, playing along with him. Once he reaches you he offers you his hand and you immediately take it into your own. 

“I’m the photography instructor for this program, you can call me Hyunjin.” He smirks down at you and you nod your head. 

“I’m Y/n.” He gives your hand a light squeeze before dropping it. 

“It’s a pleasure to have you in our club.” He winks at you before turning on his heels and stalking back over to his desk.

“Why can she call you Hyunjin but we can’t?” Mia whines, earning a dramatic eye roll from Hyunjin.

“Because I’m eight years older than you.” You chuckle lightly and Hyunjin smiles at the sound.

“How do you know that she’s your age?” James argues and Hyunjin shrugs. 

“Are you guys here to question me or to actually learn something?” The group of teens sigh as Hyunjin starts looking through his bag. “I made a project sheet for today but I suppose I can save that for next week now that we have a new member. Let’s focus on questions and practice for today.”

He pulls a thick folder out of his bag and places it on the desk right next to his massive Sony DSLR camera. You feel a bit intimidated by this side of Hyunjin, he seems to be very in his element here. Maybe he’s been doing this for a while.

“Can we do an object project?” Olivia asks in a soft voice, catching Hyunjin’s attention.

“I like that idea, what do you guys want to shoot today?” You can’t help but stare as Hyunjin talks to the kids, he seems to have a pretty solid relationship with them. You stare down at his Versace bracelet on your wrist as you listen to him talk to the kids. 

“Alright so that’s what it’ll be, four photo’s of your favorite place to be in this community center. It can be a place that you have a positive memory of or just a place where you feel the most comfortable. Today's object is a clock, if you don’t have a clock in the shot then it doesn’t count. Get creative, there are no limits. I want two black and white photos and two sepia.” The kids all stand from their seats, pulling their camera straps around their necks and talking about where to go.

“Be back here in forty-five minutes. I will set a timer, please don’t make me come find you.” The group mumbles a half hearted ‘okay’ before turning their attention back to their previous conversation. You take this time to unpack your own camera, turning it on and flipping through the settings. You made sure to watch a couple of videos before coming here but everything that you learned went right out the window once you saw Hyunjin. 

“I’ll be right with you, Y/n.” Hyunjin smiles over at you before turning his attention towards Leo. He’s been so quiet that you forgot that he was there. Hyunjin kneels in front of the boy's desk, leaning into his space a bit before whispering. You decided to look away to give them some privacy. Maybe you can manage to google some quick photography tips before he turns his attention to you.

You start looking up photography quick guides on your phone as you wait for him. You get so engulfed in the article that you’re reading that you don’t even notice Hyunjin making his way over to you until he’s sitting at the desk in front of yours. You jump a bit, locking your phone quickly.  

“Well this is a pleasant surprise.” He smiles as he leans back against the wall behind him. “You missed me so much that you tracked me down?” 

You chuckle, a light blush creeping up your neck. You look over towards where the kids were earlier and notice that they’re all gone. You must’ve been so distracted by your research that you didn’t hear them leave.

“What if I did?” You tease and now it was his turn to blush. “I didn’t know that you’re into photography.”

“Surprise.” You roll your eyes at him and he smiles towards you. “I may be a little into it. I’ve been doing it for about five years, nothing too major.”

“Clearly it is pretty major if you’re certified to teach people.”

“Are you impressed by that? Because if you are then I’ll agree.” You scoff, pushing his arm playfully. 

“No comment.” 

“That means that you are impressed.”

“Are you going to flirt with me or are you going to teach me how to work this thing?” You ask, holding your camera up in front of you while smiling towards Hyunjin. He surrenders, shaking his head and taking your camera from you.

“You’re right.” He turns your camera on, studying the settings and adjusting things the way that he sees fit. You can’t help but blush a bit as his fingers press the buttons. His gaze turned from playful to focused and serious as soon as you placed the device in his hands. The way that he operates the camera is actually pretty attractive. 

Your eyes widen a bit as you realize the nature of your thoughts. This is not the time to think about all of the things that you find attractive about your boyfriend,wait, he’s not your boyfriend. Not really, not officially, he hasn’t even asked you out for a second date yet. 

“Alright, so, this camera is actually pretty simple. I’ve adjusted some settings, I’ll show you what they all do and we can get you started on practicing the rule of thirds, sound good?” Hyunjins voice pulls you out of your thoughts and you sit up straighter in your seat. You clear your throat and look up at him as he watches you, his eyes wandering over the exposed skin of your neck for a second before looking up at you. 

“Sounds good, Mr.H.” 

“How’s this one?” You ask while looking down at your camera screen to study the photo you just took. Hyunjin steps closer to you from behind, looking over your shoulder to get a look at the photo too. 

“Perfect, I think that you should be fine without the grid now. Maybe practice eyeing it yourself throughout the week and I can check it for you when we meet next Friday.” You chuckle, turning your head to face Hyunjin and he furrows his brows in confusion. “What?”

“Couldn’t you just check it when I see you next Thursday?” He grins at you, shaking his head and tonguing his cheek.

“Nope, I’m gonna treat you just like everyone else in the club.” You narrow your eyes at him, glancing down at the tiny space between the two of you. 

“Like you are right now?” Hyunjin looks down at his hand on the small of your back and pulls his lips into a thin line.

“You’re right, Y/n this is highly unprofessional. I really need you to keep your hands to yourself.” Hyunjins eyes morph into cresents as you push him away from you, scoffing playfully.

“I hate you.” You make your way back over to your desk and Hyunjin walks over to his at the front of the room.

“Are you sure about that?” He pulls himself up onto the desk, sitting and leaning back on his palms. A deep blush runs over your cheeks as he stares over at you with an equanimous smirk adorning his lips. You look down, avoiding his piercing eye contact and now it was his turn to chuckle. “The kids should be back in a second.”

Just as he looks down at his phone the timer that he set earlier goes off. You look over at the door expecting to see them walk through but no one is there. Hyunjin closes his eyes, tilting his head back towards the ceiling and humming softly. Your eyes pinch together in confusion, is he not going to go get them? 

“Are you sure they’re coming back?” Hyunjin hums in response, a small smile pulling at his lips before he starts counting.

“5, 4, 3, 2” He points towards the open door and you can hear the loud pitter patter of the group racing down the hallway. “They’re always two minutes late.” 

“We’re here!” Olivia makes it into the room first, panting as she makes her way over to her seat. The rest of the group follows behind her, trying to catch their breath as they sit. 

“Once you all remember how to breathe we’ll get started.” Hyunjin teases, lifting his head to look at the group. You can’t help but smile, something about seeing him interact with them makes you feel warm. He's a natural leader, in the way that he carries himself, the way he talks to them. He radiates a sense of comfort and confidence in this space and it’s almost rewarding to see. 

“Can I go first?” Mia asks as she stares down at her camera.

“Nope.” Hyunjin quips quickly.

“Why not.” She whines and Hyunjin offers an exaggerated sigh in response. “I want to get it over with, Mr.H”

“And that’s why you’ll be going last.” Mia groans, putting her head down on the desk and stomping her feet. Hyunjin immediately imitates her, kicking his feet against his desk and whining. The rest of the group laughs, you even hear a faint chuckle coming from Mia. 

“Always remember that I'm ten times more dramatic than you.” Hyunjin teases before sitting up completely. “Alright, let’s do this. Show me what you got James.”

“I think that Olivia wants to go before me.” James sinks down into his seat as he tries to dodge a hit from the girl behind him.

“You threw your own girlfriend under the bus? That’s cold.”

You’d be lying if you said that you weren’t impressed. Each of the kids in this club are amazing at photography, if you saw any of the pictures that they took online you’d think that a twenty year professional was responsible for the art. You’re equally impressed by Hyunjin’s teaching skills, he answered all of their questions flawlessly and made sure that you were still engaged even though you didn’t participate in the activity. 

Once class ended Hyunjin texted you offering to walk you home, of course you said yes, you actually did miss him so you couldn’t pass up this opportunity. Your house was only four blocks from the community center but it seemed a lot longer since the city blocks are massive. Usually this would bother you, you’d put some music on and try your best to get the walk over with but you found yourself settling into a comfortable stroll with Hyunjin. You weren’t in a rush to get anywhere, you were grounded, living in the moment.

“How did you start teaching photography?” You asked as the two of you waited to cross the street. 

“My mentor set it up for me, he thought that it would be a good way to redirect my emotions.” He chuckles softly, taking a step forward to guide you across the street. “I told you that I was a bad kid but I didn’t really stop getting into trouble until I turned twenty. I met my mentor's son, Chan, a couple of weeks after my birthday when I was taking pictures of Felix for his portfolio. His dad is a photographer and he took interest in me almost instantly, he taught me some stuff and basically became a father to me. He started the club on my birthday last year when he retired from the community center.” 

“So you replaced him?” You look over at Hyunjin who seems to be deep in thought.

“Something like that, I’m one of the youth counselors but he was in charge of it all. People treat me like I’m in charge for some reason. It’s probably because I’m so smart and handsome.” He sighs dramatically, pushing his hands into his pockets and shaking his head. “It just isn’t fair, it’s so hard being me.”

“Oh yeah, it’s super hard being a model for luxury brands.” You laugh, rolling your eyes at him and bumping him with your shoulder. “I would hate being a role model for the youth.”

“Hey, this is hard work.” He defends as the two of you stop at the next corner. “But, on a serious note, I do enjoy working with them. I teach two more classes throughout the week and it’s probably what saved my life. Now, I get to help save theirs. Every kid that I teach has gotten into some kind of trouble. I like offering them a space to be themselves and learn something new, I like creating the space that I wish that I had when I was their age.” 

You stare over at the crossing light as Hyunjin opens up a bit. It’s so hard for you to imagine the sweet, soft guy standing next to you as an angry teenager fighting everything that looked in his direction. You can’t help but to feel proud of him, he seemed to have really turned himself around for the better. It takes a lot of discipline to correct bad habits. 

You keep your eyes trained on the light in front of you, waiting for it to change. Just as it turns green you reach your hand over towards Hyunjins, interlocking your fingers and offering a reassuring squeeze. He keeps his gaze forward as you two cross the street silently but the smile on his face and the blush on his cheeks speak a thousand words. He squeezes your hand back, running his thumb along the back of your hand as you reach the next block. He doesn’t need you to say anything back, your actions speak louder than any sentence you could possibly speak. 

“On a different note…” He looks over at you with a grin. “What did you tell your friends about me?”

“I am not answering that.” You start to pull away from him but he pulls you into his side, letting go of your hand and putting his arm around your shoulder.

“Let me guess, you told them that I’m the best kisser in the entire world and that I’m so amazing and funny and that you can’t get enough of me.” A goofy smile adorns his lips and you sigh, covering your face to hide your blush. “Aw, she’s shy.”

Before you can protest, your phone starts ringing in your bag and you take this opportunity to escape Hyunjins teasing. Thank god for Changbin.

“Hey, what’s up.” You laugh a bit as Hyunjin presses you into his side more. 

“Hey, are you with someone?” You can hear the smile in Changbin’s voice.

“Yup, coming home now.”

“Ah, good, could you do me a favor? I forgot to grab popcorn on the way home. Serena is coming over to watch a movie and that’s the only thing that I don’t have.” You nod, looking up the block and spotting a store on the corner. 

“I’ll grab it for you, I’m walking up to a store now.”

“You’re a lifesaver. I’ll see you soon. Oh, and tell Hyunjin that I said hi.” He sings the last part of his sentence before you say bye and hang up. He’s definitely going to question you as soon as you walk through the door. 

“Everything alright?” 

“Yup, I just need to go into this store.” You lock your phone and slip it back into your bag as you walk up to the store. “And Changbin says hi.”

There’s a group of guys outside of the store but you don’t pay them any mind, Hyunjin follows you closely as you pull away from him to enter the store, you’ve been to this shop a million times so you know where everything is. You make a beeline to the popcorn and make your way over to the counter. The cashier smiles at you as you approach, making small talk as he checks you out. Once you’re done you turn to Hyunjin who’s waiting for you at the door but his demeanor seems to have changed. His arms are crossed over his chest and he has a mean look on his face. You smile over at him as you start to leave the store but he doesn’t smile back, that’s odd. He opens the door for you and you take the lead exiting first and tucking the popcorn into your tote bag. 

“Excuse me, you’re looking really good tonight.” One of the guys standing outside of the store steps over to you and you flash him a small smile.

“Thanks.” You start to walk away but he speaks up again, stepping a bit closer to you.

“Can I have your number? I could take you out.” You shake your head, replying with a firm ‘No’ before starting to walk away again. Hyunjin places his hand on the small of your back, guiding you away from the group. 

“Come on, don’t be like that.” 

“She said no.” Hyunjin speaks up, his voice is loud and flat. You’ve never heard him use this tone before. It’s almost scary. The two of you start walking away again, Hyunjin makes sure to keep you in front of him as the two of you make your way towards the corner.

“I wasn’t fucking talking to you.” The guy follows the two of you. Picking up the pace as the two of you get further from him. “Come on, let me take you out sometime.”

“Keep walking.” Hyunjin whispers to you, pushing you forward a bit. He stops in the middle of the sidewalk, turning to face the guy following you. You can’t help but to look back as you walk away slowly, you can’t just leave him there by himself. Neither of you know what that guy is capable of. 

“Do we have a problem?”

~ Hyunjin’s POV ~

I’m using every ounce of my self control to keep my temper in check right now. If this guy decided to mess with me while I was alone that would be a different story but he’s messing with someone that I care about and I don’t like that. This has always been a trigger for me, Felix always says that I get scary when I get mad protecting someone else. I really don’t want that to happen right now, I don’t want her to see that side of me but this guy is making it very hard to hold back. 

“How about you mind your business.” He yells in my face, his breath reeks heavy of alcohol, that’s not even fair. If I hit him he’s going to be knocked out almost instantly, drunk people can never take a hit. 

“She is my business.” I cross my arms over my chest and clench my jaw. I have to remember that she’s here. I have to keep my cool. “She said no, leave her alone.”

“Ah, I see, she’s yours. Is that it? That’s your bitch?” I bite my bottom lip between my teeth as his last question rings through my ears. Don’t react, not while she’s here. “She likes pretty boys, huh?”

I look back at Y/n, she’s stopped at the corner watching me. I take a deep breath and uncross my arms, turning back around to the idiot in front of me.

“Leave her alone, alright?” I turn to walk away, trying my best to distance myself from him.

“Is this your boyfriend?” He yells over at Y/n but that’s not the only thing that makes me snap. He touched me, he pushed my shoulder as I was turning away and I felt my blood boil instantly. I don’t even remember what I did, my body went into autopilot. I can hear Y/n’s heavy footsteps as I stand over the disoriented stranger. My hand in a fist at my side, I’m shaking, why am I shaking? I haven’t felt this mad in years, I haven’t hit somebody in years, this isn’t how that was supposed to happen. I was supposed to keep my cool, why did he have to fuck it up? The more that reality sinks in, the more angry I get. 

“What did I just fucking tell you?” I don’t raise my voice, I never raise my voice, there’s no need to. I bend down, making sure to keep eye contact with him as I grab his shirt, and pull him towards me. “Leave her alone.”

I can hear myself, I can hear the hiss in my tone. I can feel the anger getting to my head, I can feel myself losing to it. That’s my problem, I don’t know when to stop, once I get started it’s hell getting out of it. 

“You should’ve listened.” I don’t want to hit him again but I feel like I need to, I need to get this feeling to go away and the only way that I know how is to keep going. 

“I’m sorry, man.” He pleads, I knew that he wouldn’t be able to take the hit but that just makes it easier for me. I push him back onto the sidewalk, letting go of his shirt and raise my fist almost by instinct. Before I can lower it I feel a hand wrap around my wrist, I stop for just a second as I remember who this is about. Y/n is with me, she saw everything. 

“Hyunjin, get up.” Her voice is firm but somehow soft, I wish that I could just listen to her. I want to listen to her, maybe I can?

 Despite my desire to stop, I don't move. My brain and my body are doing two different things and for a moment I feel guilty. This is going to be how it ends isn’t it? She’s going to think that I’m a horrible person, she’s going to hate me for putting her through this. My jaw clenches at the thought of losing her, glancing back down at the man in front of me I feel anger climbing up my spine again. Why couldn’t he just walk away?

“I told him to leave you alone.” I meant for my words to come out softer than they did but I can still hear the hiss in my voice, it’s muffled by the sound of my heart beating in my ears but I can hear it. She steps in between us, trying her best to pull me back, her grip tight and her voice stern. 

“Hyunjin, please get up.” In all of the years that I got into fights there has never been a person who could calm me down. I don’t know why it’s different with her, I don’t know why but I don't resist. I allow her to lower my fist, I allow her to stand between us and guide me to my feet. 

“Hey, look at me.” I listen, taking a deep breath and turning my attention towards her. I expected her to look angry, I expected her to have tears in her eyes or maybe even look scared. My mom would always be angry, Felix would always look scared but she looks calm. How could she look at me like that after this? I don’t deserve that.

“Good, you’re fine. Everything is fine, come on.” Her hands run over my forearms, as she tries her best to ground me and by some miracle it’s working. 

She takes both of my hands and starts to lead me away from him, I keep my eyes on her as we walk over to the corner. I try my best to calm myself down, taking deep breaths through my nose and going through every grounding exercise that I was ever taught. For some reason those techniques aren’t what help me the most, it’s the look in her eyes that's calming me down. It’s the relaxed tone of her voice and the way that she’s guiding me. No one’s ever done this before. I can feel the anger in my body being replaced, it’s that feeling of electricity. That feeling that I only get when I’m with her. 

I’m not sure how long we’ve been walking but when I finally come out of my thoughts and look back I don’t see the guy anymore. In fact, I’m pretty sure that we passed her block. We come up on a busier street, nothing too serious just a couple of people going about their night. She guides me over to a bench at the bus stop and we both sit in silence. I close my eyes, running my hands through my hair and sighing heavily. 

“Let me see your hand.” Her tone is sweet like she isn’t about to check me for bruises. She reaches for my hand, running her thumb across the back of it and I hiss in pain. That’s definitely going to be a different color tomorrow. “You’re gonna need to ice that.”

“I know the drill.” I reply in a flat whisper. “I’m sorry.”

“He deserved it.” I shake my head, turning to look at her and this time I really looked at her. I let her see the worry in my gaze, I let her see the fear that has bloomed in my stomach. 

“I’m not sorry for hitting him. I’m sorry that I almost didn’t stop, I didn’t want to stop and if you weren’t there I wouldn’t have. I would have done everything that I could to make sure that he ended up in the hospital.” I allow my gaze to drift down to my hands and it’s only then that I realize that I’m shaking. I’m still shaking, it must be the fear, not the anger.

“But you didn’t.” Her hand rests over my trembling one, petting my skin softly with the pads of her fingers. I let out a shaky exhale at the feeling of her skin against mine. “I told you that I’d be there to calm you down. I told you that it would be alright if I saw you like that and I meant it.”

“You don’t hate me?” My words leave my mouth in a whisper as I bite my bottom lip. Reluctantly, I look up at her, her expression is still so soft and calm. 

“Not one bit.”

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[albentelisa]

Hi! Heres a super interesting ask. How would you write a au where Jim is a changeling and Claire is the Trollhunter? Just to be clear, he and Bular HATE each other.

Hi! That's a premise I really like (and at some point, I wanted to write a fic like that, so I have some ideas).

So, Jim is a changeling, but he's a really young one and lacking a good chunk of the Janus Order's training. In any normal scenario, he'd never ended with a familiar, but Strickler pulled some strings to put Jim in his current position (as he noticed his talent and potential and decided to guarantee a strong subordinate early on). Nevertheless, Jim's lack of indoctrination shows as he is reluctant to follow the Order's rules, gets attached to people and openly shows his dislike of Bular (much to Strickler's amusement - though he'll never admit that one).

Still, Strickler doesn't approve Jim's rebellious streak as he's sure it'll get his protegee into a trouble. Walter is both mentor and father figure to Jim, but he is cordial only on public, while rather strict and demanding in private (though only because he cares about Jim's survival). Strickler starts to date Barbara to get better control over Jim's actions some years prior to the canon events start, however, it soon gets way beyond 'just a mission' as Walter falls in love for real. Strickler denies it, but both Nomura and Jim know the truth. By the beginning of the canon events Barbara and Strickler are engaged and planning the wedding.

As for Nomura, she is Jim's fighting instructor (as much like her Jim is one of more battle-capable changelings). She likes him a lot, but he reminds her of her younger self too much, so she believes that Jim is doomed to face so much disappointment and despair in the future.

I have mentioned before that Jim has attachments in this AU, despite being a changeling. Obviously, both Strickler and Nomura are 'family' for him, even if he never says it aloud (as those two would scold him for that statement), but there are also humans he cherishes too much. First, there is Barbara who he starts to consider his mother rather fast (Jim would kill for her if needed). Then, Toby appears in his life - while initially Toby initiated their friendship and Jim just went along for the sake of keeping his cover, it eventually turned into the real thing. However, Jim keeps his real identity a secret from Toby as he's not sure how Toby will react to him being inhuman. And finally, Jim has feelings for Claire, though he falls in love with her for a different reason than in the canon. In this AU, Jim accidentally sees Claire sneaking out to attend a concert despite her mother forbiding her that. For Jim, it's her bravery and rebellious streak that leaves the lasting impression.

Strickler is aware of Jim's crush and while he doesn't forbid it explicitly (because he's in a relationship with Barbara himself), he still warns Jim to never let his heart rule over his mind.

And then Claire finds the amulet and everything just goes to hell.

Jim discovers it the first, way before Strickler as he catches the glimpse of the amulet in Claire's bag. His feelings are complicated as the correct course of action would be getting the amulet, no matter how. Yet Jim is against hurting Claire, so his first plan is either steal the amulet or pretend it was his. It didn't work as the amulet decides to summon the armor in response to Jim's not-that-totally-harmless intent. Jim manages to fake the surprise and Claire asks him not tell anyone. Another complication is that Toby also sees the armor, so he's also involved now (and Jim isn't happy with that as he would prefer keeping his best friend as far from the troll stuff as possible).

Claire brings Jim and Toby to meet Blinky and Aaarrrgghh. Jim still plans to steal the amulet as Strickler has told him for years that it's the only chance for changelings to be rewarded like they deserved. Besides, it's the perfect way to demonstrate Bular's incompetence. For Jim, getting closer to Claire and winning her trust is vital, not to mention that he genuinely believes he protects her as well as he tries to liberate her from the burden she got by accident.

Meanwhile, Strickler learns about the amulet as well and has a talk with Jim about it. Strickler approves Jim's plan and praises him for finally putting his feelings aside for the sake of the mission success.

Yet Strickler is wrong as Jim starts to waver the longer he is around Claire both as a member of her trollhunting team and a partner in the school play (which he also joined in the hope to get more chances to seize the amulet). After Claire defeats Draal, Jim starts to think that she might have a chance to beat Bular too (and he plans to fight by her side). With that there would be no need to serve Bular and Jim could live free life.

Jim also gets close with Blinky as he doesn't get enough kindness and support from Strickler. No, he doesn't discard Strickler as his father figure, but the new bond is also there.

Strickler starts to doubt Jim, especially after Claire finds the bridge in the museum (as Jim points out that one and gets on Nomura's way when she is close to seizing the amulet). Jim tries to talk his way out of the predicament and Strickler pretends he believes him. However, he also orchestrates Enrique's kidnapping and planting NotEnrique in Claire's family to spy on her. Jim knows nothing about this plan.

When NotEnrique is exposed, he tells Claire about Jim's real identity, but she refuses to believe him at first. Draal suggests a gaggletack test and Claire agrees to the plan. She catches Jim by surprise and learns the truth. Jim runs away, not being able to explain a thing. Claire is hurt as she started falling in love with Jim, but now thinks that everything was just a lie. Toby and Blinky are hurt too as they question their bonds with Jim. And there is some bonding between Draal and Claire as they both had feelings for a changeling.

Jim is angry and upset. Strickler tells him that it was his punishment for rebellious thoughts and that Jim is lucky to get away with just that. Nomura is more sympathetic, but she tells Jim that any love relationship involving changelings are doomed.

Jim considers giving up and just going with a flow as nearly all his bonds outside the Janus Order are in the shambles (Barbara is the only one remaining and Jim is scared that Strickler might scheme to ruin that one too).

Still, Jim comes to help Claire during the Battle of Two Bridges. He is the one who finishes Bular here. He also reconciles with everyone, changing sides for good this time.

It creates a new kind of friction though - Strickler initially flee somewhere (he tells Barbara he needs to visit an estranged relative). Jim initially believes that Strickler won't return.

The team is planning to save Enrique from the Darklands and Jim insists they should get his familiar out too. He plans to tell the whole truth to Barbara too as he has decided to live his life honestly now. He just doesn't know how to do it though.

Strickler returns after freeing Angor Rot and uses binding spell behind Jim's back (as he's scared that Jim can kill him to ensure Barbara's safety - and in this AU it is a real possibility).

Jim is enraged after learning about it and it's even more complicated as they all live under the same roof and Strickler never fails to remind Jim that each of his missteps may endanger Barbara. What he hasn't considered though is that Jim might approach Angor and try to bargain with him.

Alas, Inferna Copula is destroyed in this AU too, forcing Claire and Jim working with Strickler. Poor Barbara learns that both her fiance and son are not humans the same night (and here goes Jim's plan to proceed carefully). She is angry with Strickler, but surprisingly more accepting when it comes to Jim. When Jim promises to return her real son to her, she corrects him with 'other son'. Much like in the canon she forgets about supernatural after the breaking of binding spell, but Jim tells her the truth for the second time in any case.

Much like Jim in the canon, Claire travels to the Darklands alone (actually, that was her plan from the very start as she believes it is her problem to solve). Jim, however, goes to the Darklands too (after beating some guards), so he's now considered a criminal at the Trollmarket (not that he was in good position to start with because of his changeling status).

As Jim and Claire went separately, they don't travel together. Jim finds the familiars first (well, he knows where they are kept), but gets caught by Dictatious, ending the next cell to Nomura.

Claire rescues both her brother and Jim's familiar, but goes back after learning that Jim is still in the Darklands. Usurna orders to destroy the bridge, but the rest of trollhunters steal the fragments and hide them. Strickler, who has returned and now hopes to make up with both Barbara and Jim, also helps them. All of them go to the Darklands too, saving Claire, Jim and Nomura.

Gunmar is out, like in the canon. He tries to seize control over Draal, but Nomura saves him just in time (as she doesn't leave in this AU). However, none of trollhunters are welcome at the Trollmarket anymore because everyone believes they liberated Gunmar.

Barbara is upset that she cannot do a thing while her son and her fiance who is still trying to win her forgiveness are risking their lives while she cannot do a thing. She accidentally stumbles upon the shadow stuff (the team was using it but without much effectiveness) and starts to get mastery of it. Barbara is the one who ends summoning a huge shadow portal to save everyone and gets possessed by Morgana.

The team decides to awake Merlin, and his plan is no different from the canon. He turns Claire into a half-troll and when Jim faces him in a fury, tells him that Jim should be the last person upset as Claire's new species means they can be together. Jim punches him (hell, yeah!).

Jim leaves with Claire to New Jersey. Draal who survives in this AU goes too, hoping to mend his relationship with Nomura.

When Green Knight attacks, Jim takes the hit for Claire, so he needs to fight the corruption. The team goes back in time, with Barbara and Strickler being two additions.

Claire, Jim and Strickler end in Arthur's dungeons and meet Callista there. Barbara tries to talk some common sense into Arthur, and later end joining forces with Morgana (who she's wary off initially). They both plan the escape plan. Jim and Claire travel with Callista, however Strickler decides to hang out around Camelot as he knows some changeling history and wonders if some things might be changed without ruining the timeline.

The return to the future speeds up Jim's corruption, but rather than becoming the beast troll like in the canon, it brings up and multiplies the darkness in Jim's heart. It also makes him bigger and stronger.

Barbara takes Claire and they both go inside the Shadow Realm searching for Jim's soul. They find him trapped with his own insecurities and doubts and try to ensure him that he still has his own place. Jim snaps out of the control and Nari helps to heal his corruption (Morgana helps too).

As the amulet isn't destroyed here, Claire remains the Trollhunter. Jim, however, gets Excalibur and finds his role as the protector of the world.