#even if she cannot ever love them in the way they want her to (ie as a parent loves a child)

[acaciapines]

i need to talk about the dess raises kris au. or im gonna explode.

[facefullofsadness]

hybrid!aespa in heat

subby!aespa x dom!reader

smut, 1k wc

I'm going crazy, I haven't been able to stop thinking ab this since my SEVEN THIRTY AM CLASS, but I cannot stop thinking about hybrid!aespa in heat for the first time??

like maknae line are very bby girl in ur relationship, you treating them like a princess in and out of bed, and them just sitting still looking pretty for you! yizhuo seems more of a switch in my head than minjeong does as a hybrid, but when they're in heat, they both become the subbiest babies ever!

minjeong would be RED, cheeks completely flushed and skin hot to the touch. her eyes darting everywhere and hands as fists clutching her clothes, her sheer clothing suddenly feeling too hot. you'd crawl over her squirming body on the bed and she'd whine so hard. "idk what's happening to me y/n-ie. b-but, fuck, please help me," she'd say during her first heat. her hands would reach out blindly for any part of you to clutch onto and pull you into her, her shoving her heated face into your neck. you kinda worried about her, not knowing what was going on, but after she whimpered against your neck by your hot breath whispering into her ear, it clicked. extremely sensitive and respondent to every single brush of your skin against hers, having the most reactive effects on her body. trembling, jolting, shivering, whimpering. the way she would be so loud and whiney when you finally give her what she wants, rutting her hips against your mouth or fingers, could be both! or your own hips too. "so hot, so hot!" she whines desperately, shoving her hips against you as she falls apart.

yizhuo wouldn't be so naive as to what was happening. as soon as she felt her stomach twist and that feeling consuming her entire body with every passing second, her heart started to pound and muscles would tense. immediately dragging herself shakily to look for you and burying her body into yours, sitting in your lap and purring softly in your ear on your skin. suddenly becomes a lot more clingy and whiney, not really feeling any shame or embarrassment unlike the latter. so it's not surprising when she grinds her clothed cunt against your lap, long and deep rolling of her hips against you, just to feel anything. "y/n-ie, I-I think it's happening... you smell fuck- you smell so g-good... you feel so good... I need more, this isn't enough, please give me more..." taking her right then and there on the couch and having her head thrown back as you fuck her with the utmost stamina you can give, her always begging you to give her more. would go so many rounds with you because she can't stop how the knot in her stomach would never fully be relieved, rutting against you even as you try to ease her orgasm, overstimulating herself but immediately ready to go again.

as for the unnie line, it's like night and fucking day. they're definitely wearing the pants in your relationship, having you close to them when you're out in public, pulling you into them with their hand on your hip or wrapping their arm around your shoulders. jimin is a gentle and firm lover while aeri is confident and loves to show you off (under her supervision ofc). but when they're in heat, oh my god the thought makes me dizzy. complete 180.

jimin's eyes would darken as lust and sexual desire consume her. her stare would trail your relaxed body, laying back on the bed. her core started to throb and her hands formed fists against the blankets. crawling up to you, a pained and needy expression spreading across her face. you would look up at her in confusion, your usually quiet and reserved gf looking intense, her eyes drilling holes through your body which made you feel conscious suddenly. "y/n..." she said your name so low and croaky, her voice triggering something in your brain. at this point you understood what she wanted, but you hadn't expected how badly she needed it. "I need you so badly. I need you to fuck me..." taken aback by the sudden advance had your head spinning, but seeing your girlfriend soooo needy, cheeks flushed pink and hot breath hitting your skin, her chest rising up and down with each pant she released, you had to listen to her! you pleasuring her while she's on top of you, grinding her hips down into you and releasing whiney moans with each roll of her body. mumbling incoherently how good it feels and how much of a good girl you are for listening so well to her, her fingers patting your head as her orgasm builds to the wet sounds coming from her aching core.

aeri hated being a hybrid at times because she knew going into heat would make her subby! born to be a dommy mommy, forced to be a baby girl! she absolutely rocks your world whenever you guys fuck, but when she finally experiences it, it's almost comical how different she suddenly is. pushing you up against the door having just come home from dinner, greedily feeling your body with her big hands and lips bruising against her's. when your thumb traced her nipple, she'd moan embarrassingly loud into your mouth, shocking both of you. you pull back to look at her and her eyes are squinted shut, leaning her body into your touch more when you try to take your hand away. "fuck y/n, don't you dare pull away, give me your all right now. I need you sososo bad, it hurts so fucking much..." she'd moan and whine like a sub while demanding you to fuck her like the natural dom she is. sitting in her lap with your lips around her neck, your tongue dragging across the length of her throat as she pulls you by the waist further into her, trying to maximize the amount of sheer pleasure you were giving. releasing deep guttural groans with every roll of her hips, the occasional high pitched loud moan escaping, her fingernails digging into your skin.

and I didn't really mention it but my headcanons for hybrid!aespa are kitten or wolf!rina, puppy!aeri, bunny!winter, and kitten!ning. BUT TO EACH THEIR OWN! (I wish they OWNED me- what who said that?)

[ironunderstands]

Not a question, just very happy it's not just me loving IP3 (or trans Ratio for that matter). Yap away on both

Ugh I love them both so much

Most of my headcanons are when I find something to be better and/or more interesting than it is in canon, or something that’s a great extension of canon, and that’s exactly what trans Ratio is to me.

It takes his already present insecurities and squares them, as now the doctor has to contend with not just being a SMART enough man, but being a smart enough MAN, and adding that extra layer of misery and complexity is just so delightful.

By taking a character racked by self doubt and adding another layer to it, like Ratio being trans, you complicate his current insecurities and give new perspectives to look at them from.

Like in canon Ratio exercises so much because he wants to be the most perfect, best version of himself and has been doing it since a very young age (middle school).

But then you add him being trans to that, and suddenly he’s not just combating being perceived as not good enough, he’s combating being perceived entirely, attempting to try and get others to view him the way he really is, and attempting to live up to whatever masculine ideal that would push away his dysphoria, something prominent within his life from a young age.

I’ve kinda dived into this within my fics about it, but I like the idea that Ratio keeps this a secret from everyone- and I mean everyone. He already doesn’t live up to his own expectations of himself, so to have the rest of the galaxy find out that he doesn’t live up to their expectations of him either (ie being a cis man I mean you cannot tell me there aren’t like hundreds of people in universe begging for his uh- yeah), it would crush him.

I mean considering how guarded he is already, adding another thing to hide behind that alabaster mask would be fun, even if I think Ratio is likely at least a decade post-op + post-transition, so it’s not like he has to bind or anything, but the threat is still there. Especially considering his well known love of baths- imagine if he avoided the public baths at his home planet (considering how heavily Greek/Roman inspired Ratio is), and how that might affected him growing up, or just the tendency of shirtlessness in general.

There’s just a lot of possibilities and intricacies to it that makes me really like this particular headcanon, and it will always be canon in my heart haha. I have some more silly things behind it, like me wanting to give Aventio and Ratiopaz biological kids because it would be cute, or just the inherent joy of the big buff guy actually being the trans one rather than who you would expect it to be/who it’s stereotypically made as- Aventurine, as I like when characters have traits you don’t expect them to possess.

I also tend to dislike Aventurine being made ftm because he’s implied to be an SA survivor and rep for amab victims is already kinda abysmal so I don’t like taking it away, also I just think it’s boring tbh, at least for me it just doesn’t interest me.

Trans Topaz is a whole other discussion, personally I think she’s mtnb, and more femme presenting (I’d make her use she/they in my fics it’s just pronoun swapping when writing polyamory is miserable and anybody who’s ever written it can attest to that 😭, it’s there in spirit I promise!)

I honestly don’t have deep reasons behind this one, it’s just pure vibes. Someone was like, “Topaz gives nonbinary” once on here and I’m like yeah, yeah she does 😭. She reminds me of Childe a lot and I also view him as nonbinary so she’s kinda in a similar boat.

I think she’s very motherly but like in the way Mother Nature is if that makes sense? Mother is mothering but she’s also a creature tm* and certified tax collecting humanity loving entity. Also I have a close friend who’s a trans woman and Topaz reminds me of her so like, bam ur trans now lol (hi Alice if ur seeing this).

As for Aventiopaz, I fear I’d need a whole other post dedicated to why I like them. You guys know why I like Aventio, Avenpaz also require a whole other yap session, and Ratiopaz is the best rarepair ever fight me. Generally I like it because it’s really sweet, the dynamic is hilarious, they are the power trio of all time, they have great gameplay synergy, and their designs complement each other a lot- being primary colors and all.

I also enjoy their individual unique relationships to the IPC and how that might affect their interactions with one another, both in canon and in my brain. Moreover the trio of coworkers who are well known around the office for a) getting the job done and b) being absolutely obnoxious around one another (in a good way) is incredibly fun and I enjoy the idea of all the shenanigans they would get up to.

Perhaps my next Aventiopaz fic would be them going on a mission together or something, as I definitely want to write another one, and also update my slideshow of the parents au, I’ve just been so busy and a bit unmotivated 😭 so hopefully I can get to that soon

[dangermousie]

Cang Xuan preparing food for Princess Picky personally, despite his exhaustion, because he couldn't for Xiao Yao when they were kids made me think of something.

It's not that Cang Xuan is an unkind person per se. Not at all. Those he loves, he gives his all to - look how tenderly and unstintingly he treats even a mere substitute for Xiao Yao. He is kind and considerate and tender to those who he loves. But only to those he loves. We see the difference in how he treats Xiao Yao after he knows who she is and before, when he thinks that's some random small town physician. The former gets all his care and the latter gets the worms eating her hands. Xiao Yao's personality and character and actions haven't changed, but who she is to him has and so we have this vast difference.

And it makes no difference for XY that he's like that because he's her brother and her closest living family (she is removed from her grandfather and father) and she loves him the way one loves family UNLESS it ever would try to change to a romantic relationship. Because if he's her brother, the relationship is sort of baked in - siblings are siblings regardless of how badly it can go (after all, Tushan Jing and his monster of a brother will unfortunately always be siblings and the latter disassembled the former), but if he wants to move it from cousins who treat each other as siblings to romance (ie people with no familial bond) territory, she can't and won't for a lot of reasons but one of them are the limits of his kindness. It is natural enough to be kind to those you love. But what concerns her, and the reason she reiterates more than once she wants Jing is that the latter is kind to everyone. Hell, the man doesn't want revenge on his torturer even and he's kind to his awful fiance and unpleasant grandma. Xiao Yao, on a basic level, cannot trust she is lovable, that she is someone a person can CHOOSE to love forever - she's had so much abandonment in her life by those who owed her to love her - her family - that it broke something in her on a deeply fundamental level. That is where her wanting a dependent man who will see nothing but her comes in too, but also there is a deep belief that she can't keep anyone's love, not really. So Jing's dependency is Plan A but his kindness is Plan B. She wants someone who will be so devoted to her she will be his one meaning BUT if that devotion fails and love dies (as deep down she believes is inevitable), she wants someone so kind who will still be kind and good to her (and thus won't leave or at least treat her gently) even if he doesn't love her any more, even if he dislikes her.

I remember people being driven mad that Jing didn't seek revenge and/or didn't kick his fiancee to the curb and told granny to shut it but it's that Victorian heroine inability to hurt anyone's feelings, even people who he dislikes at best, is exactly what draws her to him. I mean, why does she give him her magic blood that cures him? He was going to die and there was no indication she going to, after all. It's because of this:

His being almost dead but holding out his hand all night so the hot wax won't fall on her face.

I find it such an interesting thing that the heroine chooses a man on the basis of his gentleness and kindness. It's such a gender role reversal within a narrative.

PS I remember people who didn't like her canon choice complaining that she picked him due to her trauma, if she didn't have it, she'd have picked X instead. I mean, probably true. If she didn't have her trauma she may very well not paid attention to him. Equally, if he didn't have his trauma, he may have very well not paid attention to her. But so what? We are the sum of our experience. To say that if one had a different life one would be a different person with different choices is tautological. We don't have other characters with other lives - we have who we have and they make choices according to that.

[thecasualqueer]

oooooohhhh def def agree with your addition! and just bc your addition got my brain tumbling, if I may add:

"So, I don't think this is something that TV Kara has ever admitted to anyone, to the point where even when being asked by someone close to her who has been through similar things she still can't admit it."

I sooo agree with this PLUS I think the expectations and pressure she felt all added to her not admitting it. Like in the start, she didn't have anyone to really talk to about her survivor's guilt who would really understand why it hurt so much. Someone who wouldn't pity and baby her if she mentioned it. Bc to the Danvers and even to Kal, Kara was just a kid. Not someone who would've been the youngest Kryptonian in the science guild, not someone who will never hear the harmony of prayers in Rao's Temple ever again, not a girl who didn't just lost her family but every single person she's ever met, too.

When Kara was younger (and even in the show, as an adult), the people around her could never fully grasp the depth and grief that Kara carried (which Kara is also infinitely grateful for, she wouldn't wish this pain on anyone), so she definitely kept it in. Both duty-bound to continue living for her parents who told her to, and for her new family who have sacrificed so much to keep her safe and alive. But for a long while, she definitely did not want to.

But what else could she do? Add another point of pain to the people who have already been through so much just to keep her with them?

You're so right in mentioning Kara's martyr-like approach in S1 and I think that applies to the way Kara never really talks about her darker thoughts too. She would martyr her emotions and thoughts if it meant keeping her loved ones from worrying about her. In her mind, and as taught to her way back on a planet that once was home, it is important to be "other-focused" and to show restraint towards things that would "unbalance" the peace.

Kara doesn't admit that she dreams of death bc she doesn't feel like she deserves it and because she doesn't feel like it's fair to share to her loved ones (who, to Kara, have sacrificed so much for her).

anywayysss sorry for the long ask-reply to your addition it just got my brain going brrrrrr 😂😅 I'd love to hear if you have any more additions or different thoughts though!

yes this ☝️☝️☝️

I also think this intense unspoken pain is also what draws her to Mon El. At the point when she meets him she has gone so long feeling this way and never being able to talk about it that when she thinks she has found someone who could finally understand she can't let that opportunity pass by (even if he is the biggest dick to walk the earth).

also... having to send him away after all this??? ie literally subjecting someone else to the the same trauma she's spent her entire trying to get away from, bc it's the only choice she has to save the world.

No wonder she has a mental breakdown and quits her job after!!!!

Also, also, this is one of the things that makes her relationship with Lena so special and unique, bc even though they have vastly different experiences Lena is probably the only person in her life who can relate to having trauma so deep that it cannot even be spoken about. Just like Kara, Lena has been through so much that she is practically bursting at the seems (mentally), and just like Kara, she has had to put on a brave face through all of it.

Like, look me in the eye and tell me that Kara does not put her trauma into little boxes!!!

Anyway, sorry it took so long for me to reply to this ask I've been really busy lately but I hope it was worth the wait.

👉original post (where it started)

[agenderpunked]

just finished lost. will not be recovering, ever, me thinks...

I'M GONNA RAMBLE BECAUSE WHAT WAS THAAAAT OUUUUUGH I DIDN'T SEE ANY OTHER WAY FOR IT ALL TO END BUT THE FACT THAT IT *IS* WHAT THEY WENT WITH hURTS

I have so many thoughts and many of them are spoilers so if you haven't watched Lost (2004) stop reading this and go watch it instead.

- Jack dying in the same place he started. The cinematography and spiritual implications of making a trek back to the beginning and finally closing his eyes... DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON VINCENT LYING DOWN NEXT TO HIM I CRIIIIIIIIIIIED. THE DOG KNOWS "LIVE TOGETHER OR DIE ALONE" AND HE MAKES SURE JACK DOESN'T DIE ALONE IM IN SHAMBLESSSSS DONT TALK TO ME

- rose and bernard. i care you so bad. i want a bob ross energy survival show spin off that just follows them making their cabin and garden and traps and such and exploring the area around their cabin. Unproblematic favs, truly. THE FACT NO ONE BELIEVED ROSE WHEN SHE SAID SHE KNEW HER HUSBAND WAS ALIVE???? who visited you and told you that? are you just that faithful??? Did that hope, faith, and love protect both of you from dying on the island before you found each other??

BC ALSO. sorry but i view faith as energy, and when you focus and devote that energy to something it becomes concentrated, and what do our brains run on? electricity. what is everything about Lost about? electromagnetism. What can spirits fuck with? electromagnetic frequencies. That energy can be used to attract what you're searching for. Rose is such a necessary character ESPECIALLY for Jack's development because of how she displays such radical acceptance when she knows there are things she cannot change, ie. cancer, being trapped on the island, being surrounded by danger, and focuses instead on what she can, confirming her husband's status, creating an environment that feels safe, and enjoying the time she has left with the people she loves.

- Boone and Shannon getting into a bar fight at the end??? Boone walking up to Hurley and chatting??? Boone and Shannon are severely underrated characters in my opinion, and it's 100% from the emotionally incestuous aspects of them, which is a shame because I truly believe they are one of the most realistic depictions of relationships like that that I've seen in media. I didn't immediately like Boone. I thought he was an asshole because the show presents Shannon and Boone to you as they would an unhappy romantic relationship, but they never confirm it, even joke about it, to the point I nearly immediately realized 'They're not dating at all. They're siblings that were emotionally neglected by their parents and are codependent as all hell.'

Watching further, I was so scared to think I'd find Boone slander all up and down in the fandom while Shannon gets victimized and absolved of her fucked up actions, because of the way we immediately see Boone treat her without the context for understanding their relationship and that Boone was only on 815 to bail her out of another abusive relationship. But what I actually got from the fandom was NOTHING. ABOUT EITHER OF THEM!!!!

HOW ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT BOONE HALLUCINATING SHANNONS DEATH AND ADMITTING THAT HE WAS UTTERLY RELIEVED 😭😭😭 IM GONNA BLOW MYSELF UP ABOUT IT GOOD GOD.

The fact that Shannon also does find a potentially healthy relationship with Sayid, and that Sayid can allow himself to feel and care for someone and have gentle and tender moments in such a hostile environment while serving as the groups main mercenary, and make her feel safe, regardless of her clearly morally skewed history of dating. Sayid has morals, and he wants to stick to them, but he's been put in environments that do not allow him to adhere to that. He has restraint, and emotional intelligence. The glimpse we get into Shannon's life shows she hasn't been around men of those qualities, at least recently, save for Boone, who even then, doesn't compare next to Sayid. Imagining how Shannon would have felt about Sayid being brought back in the temple and seeing how extremely empty and different he is 😟

- Thinking about the general implications of what the island is, as well... Did they ever survive the initial crash? When they leave the island, were they alive? or was it merely an illusion of life? Is death on the island equivalent to someone accepting that they're dead and moving on for realsies? Is the island symbolizing purgatory? The themes of duality and shadows and light and twins are also not lost on me and rank this media even higher because these were not on my bingo card or prior knowledge of the show and they are damn near a critical criteria for intriguing me and getting me into a media.

Are the souls whispering in the forest of the island trapped there? Michael says they can't move on, but is it a personal choice grappling with what they did? Or is it related to actions done after death, while passing through purgatory, that decides whether you are bound to a place or able to move freely???

Oooooooough.....

[sm0lprism]

I found your BG3 fic on AO3, having no knowledge of g/t whatsoever, and found it so cute that I had to come find your tumblr to learn more! And omg the genre is adorable! I’m loving your fic: Ria herself is such a little (tiny!) badass, and the dynamics with the group are so much fun to read! Your style is really descriptive, too, and conveys a lot in the small actions of the characters.

The first chapter had me cackling at the accuracy — Ria is only alive and not-eaten because Astarion likes the sound of his own voice so much that he talked at her until Official Cat Dad Gale could notice and stop him (“What’s in your mouth? No! Spit that out! That’s people! Bad vampire!”). He literally cannot get out of his own way.

I’m so excited for the next chapter! Poor Ria, that her ally in finding Minthara is the smoothest brain in the party. And this will not be easy for Astarion to explain to the rest of the crew that *this one time* he actually wasn’t trying to eat her. So worried for our teeny friend! I guess worst case scenario… at least he’s undead? So, maybe Ria isn’t in *as much* danger, maybe? Would be kind of hilarious if Astarion knows so little about vampirism as to not even know that eating solid “food” (ie people) doesn’t agree with his undead organs.

So looking forward to Ria meeting Minthara! Ria may be small, but she’s still a tough little lass and I can see Minty respecting that.

Oh my goodness anon, you have no idea just how much this comment means to me - this has made my whole day, no, my whole week, and if I could frame a comment I would frame this one and hang it on my wall. It means even more since you had no idea what g/t was prior to reading my fic, and that is honestly so special to me that you took the time to read it (and liked it!!) and leave such a thoughtful comment. All I can say is welcome to the g/t community! It makes me so happy that you found the community through my fic and I hope you enjoy it! I have been laughing so hard at your description of Astarion finding Ria in chapter 1 and Gale being a cat-dad, like, I actually don't have the words because it's so goddamn accurate and hilarious all at the same time!! As for the latest chapter, I promise that Ria will not be taking a trip down Astarion's throat, so you needn't have to worry about that. Although if he were to swallow, it would be very bad for Ria as I believe in game Astarion can consume solid food, it just doesn't hold a lot of nutritional value for him. However, in my fic, vampires do in fact consume borrowers quite actively for their blood, so it would be a grim end for Ria if he were to actually eat her. ;w; Fortunately for her though, he has developed a small soft spot for her now so she'll be okay <3

Ria's encounter with Minthara is not going to go well. ^^; I don't want to spoil too much, but seeing as how Minthy was involved with trading borrowers for their blood in my fic, she thinks very lowly of them which you'll see in the next chapter when I get around to writing it. Anyhow, thank you so much for your comment. I actually can't stop smiling since I read it and it's probably the best feedback I've ever received for a fic, so thank you anon. <3

[italiansteebie]

not a prompt or hc but i just wanted to say that i found it interesting how you, and autistic steve truther, and i, an autistic nancy truther, view stancy completely differently despite both being extremely against the ship. you see nancy as the one who hurt steve in the relationship, whereas i see steve as the one who wronged nancy. no hate at all, you're fully entitled to your own opinion and views, i just thought this was interesting based on our respective interpretations of both characters.

thanks for sharing bc i've been wanting to talk about this!

i am a truther of both, nancy's actions hurt steve, she could not see why, she didn't understand how steve felt differently about barb and barbs death, it was black and white thinking, she was so hyper focused on barb and her own guilt that she could not focus on thinking about the way her actions could effect steve. much like her other story lines, she gets so focused on finding the truth or bringing justice (autism) that she forgets that her actions can and will effect the people around her, and although she isn't meaning to hurt them, she's pushing them away in order to fulfill her own sense of justice. (autism)

steve, ever the masker, was so focused on what he thought he was supposed to do that when it didn't work out how he thought, he was crushed. because of his deep deep mask, the only way his brain thought to react was what he has seen from his friends and likely his family, (autistic mask) and hurt nancy by calling her a slut.

they hurt each other, they were both wronged by each other, that is why stancy should NEVER be end game. and i stand by that.

nancy doesnt understand that she's pushing people away. she doesn't see it like that, just because her focus isn't on them doesn't mean she doesn't care.

steve doesnt understand why nancy won't fit into the role he created for her in his mind. when she broke that role, he couldn't comprehend the hurt and the change. and he tried to rationalize by getting even IE, his own sense of justice.

(we cannot forget the hurt they both inflicted. nancy DID cheat on steve. not intending to hurt him, but trying so hard to break the role steve tried to force on her. i fully believe steve did not love her, but thought it's what he HAD to do.)

they both deserve apologies from each other. but they should not date. nope.

[lifeneedsrot]

⚓️listen up buccaneers! This ship has been real mismanaged lately, but I run a tight ship here. Our main account is starshipsys, and this is our VENT and NSFW account. Expect lots of barely censored triggering topics on this account. I’m talking NSFW as in gore, not porn, but there will be horny textposts. That’s not what this account used to be, but it’s what it is now!

Our system used to be split in half, with one half on the other account, and the other half on this account. That’s not how it’s gonna work anymore. We’re ONE crew, and we won’t be having any mutinies here. I will listen to all crewmates but ultimately I’M the guy in charge, got it? This account is for ANYONE in the system to use. It’s where we put the gross stuff that we don’t want to share on our main. If we’re following you, either you post stuff we want to see, or you’re a friend we trust.

We are proship and proendo. I don’t give a shit what you believe in or how your system formed. I don’t give a shit what you’re into because we’re into weird shit as a coping mechanism, and we’re not about that gatekeeping lifestyle. We are willing to befriend ANYONE as long as they’re respectful and don’t cause us harm. I don’t care what you’ve done or believed. I only care who you are now and how you treat me, my system, the people close to me, and the people close to you. Close meaning both in proximity and in intimacy. We don’t bother engaging with obvious bait and arguments that would get nowhere, so don’t bring discourse here.

With all that being said, here’s a list of alters and what to expect, as well as the ideal way of interacting with them. We are not used to the tumblr tagging system, but I’m gonna try and get us to start tagging things as “[insert alter name] starshipsys” to make it possible to filter certain alters out or search for certain alters in particular. Unless otherwise specified, all alters enjoy being talked to about whatever they’re saying.

🧤Agate, they/them. 8. Childhood trauma venting, general fears and anxiety, sadposting. Please talk to them, avoid sexual subjects and violent subjects.

🪩Boppie, they/them. 21. Wanting to do drugs, wanting to go to parties, generally very bad life advice and unhealthy coping mechanisms. They won’t be able to have a very deep conversation with you, but love talking to people.

♠️Cole, he/it. 21. Venting about lost relationships within the system, references to self harm or alters attempting to self harm, weird sexual stuff about being turned on by sharp objects piercing soft flesh. He holds a lot of autistic symptoms, and doesn’t talk much.

🐰Daisy, she/her. 7. Hypersexual syskid, yes they are real, but we’re not comfortable sharing anything she wants to say anyway. You can only talk to her if she talks to you first, and you cannot engage in any of her sexual nature unless you have our simplyplural and a safe alter is fronting alongside her. Trying to sexualize her without explicit permission from a safe alter and HER will result in us never talking to you ever again.

🔭Estella, she/they. 21. Mostly just frustration with classes. Feel free to talk to her.

🐁Fobi, it/she. Nonhuman adolescent. Panic attacks, triggering situations we experience in real life, irrational behavior in an attempt to prevent abuse from happening again (IE disfiguring yourself out of fear that being attractive will result in sexual assault). Please try to talk to it and calm it down, if Fobi is fronting we are probably in an immediate danger.

🦇Grim, it/any. Nonhuman adolescent. Romanticization of abusive behaviors, fawning stress response. It wants to be abused in every way. Try to reassure it that it can be loved without being abused.

🌺Haven, she/he. 21. Mostly just rambles about the people we love, affection towards friends, maybe even soft hornyposting. She likes talking to people, especially if you’re our friend. He might even make a post about you if you talk to him.

✏️Indigo, they/them. 12. Probably vents about not being able to achieve our dreams and life goals we had when younger. Get them talking about a special interest and they’ll adore you. Sex repulsed, don’t bring that up.

🎊Jynx, she/any. Ageless entity. God complex posting, torture threats, and domination fantasies (sexual and nonsexual). She is actually friendly, despite how mean she presents herself as, and desperate for the approval of others.

🍠Kakxyl, he/any. Ageless entity. He is the alter that changes the roles of other alters, and will talk about everything all of the other alters talk about, but from an outside perspective. He won’t engage in conversation if he’s busy.

🫐Lynx, he/any. Ageless entity. Not much, really. Probably won’t post at all. He can barely communicate, and generally him fronting means we’re experiencing a wide variety of emotions, specifically from an emotional attack on either the inside or outside.

⚓️Maverick, they/he. 21. Goals for the future and plans, as well as general venting about daily frustrations. Assume they’re talking to another alter unless they’re talking directly to you.

🍥Nyan, he/she. 6-8. Whatever kids complain about when they don’t have trauma, idk. Please talk to them and try to cheer them up. If you bring up anything traumatic, though, we will be very upset with you. He probably won’t even be allowed on this account anyway.

🚀Oscar, he/him. Nonhuman adult. Vents about how awful all of our relationships and the people we love are. He specifically holds the splitting towards hate symptoms of BPD whereas Haven and Grim hold splitting towards love. Don’t take what he says too seriously, he is intentionally trying to push you away because he is afraid you’ll abuse us. Don’t talk to him unless you’re in a sane enough mental state to deal with him.

🩵Present, she/it. Nonhuman adult. Sad posts about our relationship with an ex, and attempts to comfort other alters. She likes when people talk to her, but can be a bit of a downer.

🥀Quasiren, they/them. 17-19. Venting about relationships in an attempt to build a codependent relationship with someone. They love when people talk to them.

🥩Raptorse, it/its. Nonhuman adult. Vorny (vore+horny) posting, hunger. Doesn’t hold conversations very well unless they involve food.

🎆Starbound, she/any. Ageless entity. Rage posting, threats to hurt herself or others, general aggression. If you weren’t the reason she fronted, feel free to talk to her. If you are the reason she fronted, you should probably wait about thirty minutes to an hour after she starts fronting. You can ask her if you made her front.

🪱Tazelein, he/any. Ageless entity. Torture posting, threats to torture, horny posting, romanticization of literally every bad thing ever. Yes, every bad thing ever. Yes, even that. He doesn’t represent our “true feelings” about anything, he mostly just provides a source to point to for our intrusive thoughts. He will say some fucked up shit to you, but he loves people very much, and hates death.

🕊️Utopia, they/them. Ageless entity. Weird philosophical or religious nonsense. Will probably try to convert you to whatever religion they’re making up right now.

🦠Vitriol, it/its. Nonhuman adult. Hatred for the system, disgust for all alters, will talk about everything we’ve ever done wrong. Wants to push people away to protect them from us. Won’t want to talk to you, most likely, unless you directly triggered its fronting.

🕸️Webber, they/any. Ageless entity. Abandonment issues, trust issues, soft bondage, probably some hornyposting. Will love talking to you, but tends to ramble and send very long messages.

🔥Xray, he/him or xe/xim/xis. Primordial god. Generic and vague complaints about our daily life. Likes to cut to the chase in conversations and be very direct.

🌲Yarrow, they/it or yey/yem/yeir. Primordial god. Long rambles about various alter’s mental states, similar to what Kakxyl may post, but with the purpose of informing outsiders rather than changing the perspectives of alters. Yey want someone to listen to and talk with, but might stop replying spontaneously if yey get particularly invested in documenting something.

🌊Zenith, ze/zer/zers. Primordial god. Positive things, sexual things, and general bragging about our life and our successes. Ze loves people and would love to talk.

As a general rule, only talk to alters that you’re comfortable talking to. No, this is not roleplay. We have disabling DiD, and yes it is diagnosed. If you do something to upset us, we will tell you directly before we publicly vent about it.

[thegeminisage]

STAR TREK UPDATE TIME quick fast. last night we watched tng's "gambit part ii" and ds9's "cardassians"

gambit part ii (tng):

well, this continued to be underwhelming and frustrating for reasons outlined in my previous post

i will cop to maybe not following the plot as closely as i could have been but i thought the artifact turning out to be a weapon was fucking stupid, especially considering it was a Mind Weapon. girl what on earth. we didn't even get to visit vulcan properly

i DID however call that vulcan racefaking as romulan which i was quite thrilled about

vulcan race purity extremists right as we're having bajoran race purity extremists in ds9...girl what is in the water out there. everybody calm down. globalization (galaxization?) is not the end of the world

i did perk up a little when riker was forced to play his literal charade with other people, such as worf and beverly, but it was so brief as to be nearly insulting

this is the only time i think i have not sided with data in an argument...i don't think there was any reason to take poor worf to the woodshed like that :( i'm glad they're still friends though

cardassians (ds9):

oh i had STARS in my eyes this entire episode. i have been COUNTING DOWN THE DAYS until we see garak again and he did NOT disappoint

from what i saw of gifs i never expected his and julian's relationship to be like this...i expected julian to be mister stammery and for garak to enjoy making him squirm. which would have been great and i would not object to it in future content but what we got was a welcome surprise in that it was way more complex!!

like, julian as the garak whisperer...sisko didn't summon garak to his office directly he told julian to have garak there at a certain time. "he never tells me what he's actually thinking i just sort of deduce it"etcetc. i also like julian instinctively knowing when to let garak come to him and when to be firm with him ie stop the whole fucking shuttlecraft until his ass gets some real answers. we havent seen much of his bedside manner yet so to speak but he actually CAN be good with people! or maybe just good with garak

i can't wait to find out more about garak. the worst part of a garak episode is knowing now you have to wait a long time until the next garak episode. i love that he deliberately keeps us out of the loop even though i am DYING to know everything about him. you get the idea that he's really been through something

side bar how and why is he able to get into julians room in the middle of the night???? did julian give him the door code jic 👀other side bar i love this mans little silk pajamas. actually everybodys pj game was on point

cardassian war orphans FUCKED UP. no one is coming to take them back to cardassia, except the one who doesn't want to go. i am SO relieved they didn't pull a tng here by the way. going in i was almost sure they wouldn't but still

bonus points for obrien being fantasy racist in front of his japanese wife. she used her teacher voice to set him straight and not another word of that came out of his mouth for the entire episode. one that man knows about happy wife happy life. two it's a good callback to him also having a card in the cardassian-hating game. pretty sure we said "that was a very ugly thing you just said i dont need to hear it twice" about 1000 times to each other during the rest of the episode

my only gripe with this episode is that i would have liked to hear where kira comes down on this...this episode was very full and not really About her, but the absence of her felt very weird, especially when most of the cardassian stuff involves her so heavily. you can sort of guess where she'd stand ("if they don't like the way we parent they shouldn't have left them here and also we're being way nicer to them than they ever were to bajoran children") but i'd still like to hear it FROM HER. a shame we just didn't seem to have room

of course, i cannot possibly end this post without a shoutout to my very best friend sisko. my favorite sisko moment in this episode was his increasing incredulity when bashir interrupted his MEETING WITH A CARDASSIAN POLITICIAN to interrogate him without warning and then said "it was the highlight of my day. don't do it again." and then bashir did it again. my second favorite part was when bashir woke him up at fuck o clock and said he needed a runabout and sisko was like girl why and julian was like im sorry i have no idea and sisko was like well by all means. will one runabout do. like. he's so wry and sarcastic and at the same time so chill with breaking the rules when it matters - he trusts julian enough to know he wouldn't ask for a shuttle without a good reason and julian trusts him enough not to get mad at the request even when it comes at fuck o clock in the morning. like, he's so GOOD with his people and they respect him so much. im anxiously waiting for more sisko-centric content almost as much as i am for more garak content!!!

TONIGHT: tng's "phantasms" and ds9's "melora."

[rolansrighthorn]

Get To Know Your Tav

Tagged by @voloslobotomyservice I won't tag anyone since I already did in the other post but if you see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!

Link to my first post here.

I have two I would like to introduce but tumblr's text limit is forcing me to do two seperate posts, and this is the second one. This post is dedicated to my OC, Willow Hvithrafn, she is in her late 20s and is a white high half elf with dove white hair and hazel eyes with gold flecks. I am still debating if she will have freckles/sunspots.

I have NOT published ANY chapters of Tender For You so all of this information will contain spoilers!

What is their:

Favorite weapon? Willow has a Starlight Glaive (akin to the Moonlight Glaive) that she saved her own money since she was a child to have made specially by a local high elf. The high elf was a priestess of Lathander and wanted to create the Sunlight Glaive for Willow, but Willow is half Moon Elf and felt more connected to the stars.

Style of combat? Willow is a Vengeance Oath Paladin and loves any situation in which she can smite an opponent with her Starlight Glaive.

Most prized possession? Her Starlight Glaive is her most prized possession for sure. Her second would be a little gem she found when she was out scouting with Geraldus (she gave him one as well).

Deepest desire? I think she has two. The first being she wants nothing more than to help keep balance in the world and to protect those who cannot protect themselves. She also wishes for a very long and happy life with Geraldus once she accepts her feelings towards him.

Guilty pleasure? Even if she's had enough food, she loves when Geraldus comes up to her lookout and shares berries with her he foraged. She is a glutton not for food, but for any amount of interaction and attention from Geraldus.

Best-kept secret? Willow has largely convinced the mass majority of those around her that she is an eternally crabby, heartless, uncaring creature despite having joining the Harpers for the greater good. There are only a handful of people who see through this, and even less who give her any effort of friendship.

Greatest strength? Her greatest strength is her righteousness/sense of justice. If there is any enemy she is focused wholly on eliminating them- unless Geraldus is in direct way of harm.

Fatal flaw? This is a great question to ask right after the above because Geraldus is her biggest weakness. She had no idea she could ever want or love someone and when out together she is always too focused on his safety, which creates weaknesses in her group's formation and puts not only her life at risk but everyone else's as well.

Favorite scent? Willow loves the scent of the pine forests and rain, which remind her of Geraldus. His musk is also a scent she loves.

Favorite spell/cantrip? She actually hates using magic aside from her Smiting spells.

Pet peeve? Other people just existing. She wants to protect the world, but finds the world wholly obnoxious and frustrating to exist in.

Bad habit? Willow is quick to anger and quick to run away from any confrontation or problem outside of direct combat (ie with teammates, friends, family, etc)

Hidden talent? One night she and Geraldus discover she is quite good at playing the Lute.

Leisure activity? Willow loves laying at her lookout with Geraldus, watching the sun set and subsequently watching the stars twinkle and move across the night sky.

Favorite drink? She isn't much of a drinker of anything aside from water- she isn't a fan of hangovers or the dryness in your mouth alcohol leaves.

Comfort food? She isn't enough of a fan of food to really have a comfort food, but she really enjoys eating beef.

Favorite person(s)? Willow dislikes everyone by default. Her two favorite people are Geraldus and the Dragonborn Paladin she befriends, Kava.

Favored display of affection? She is not a very sexual or open person. Most of the time when she shows affection it is in the form of hooking her pinky with Gerladus' pinky or just holding his hand.

Fondest childhood memory? Willow's childhood holds very little she would want to even remember, but there is too much pain linked with her past for her to consider anything as "fond" or positive.

Anything else you’d like to share? Willow will only ever let Geraldus all the way in to her heart. He will be the only one to ever see her for who she truly is underneath all the fear and hurt, and he loves her as she is. Once they get together he will be the single most important thing in her life, even being a Harper comes second to being Geraldus' protector and lover.

[lesbianlenas]

are you pro choice?

of course i am pro choice….u cannot be a feminist if u aren’t pro choice. the base core tenant of feminism is for women to have bodily autonomy which is impossible w/o access to abortion. no woman or girl should be forced to have a baby and women can’t be liberated from patriarchy w/o full reproductive autonomy. the literal basis of misogyny is men wanting to control reproduction which is the one thing they are not able to control so they have to subjugate women to do it. u cannot have women’s liberation w/o abortion access. idc if any woman personally doesn’t want to have an abortion or if they are morally against it for themselves if they want to call themselves a feminist they need to understand that other women MUST have the right to control whether or not they are pregnant. and i am not just pro choice i LOVE abortion 🤩 i dont think there is anything wrong w it at all and women should have the ability to decide what they want to do w their lives forever and ever. allowing men to control women’s bodies only leads to women being abused and prevented from taking the steps to develop their own independent lives. making abortion a moral issue is entirely religious doctrine (painting women who become pregnant unintentionally as being impure, deviant, seductresses, and immoral who should have been good catholic women waiting for marriage and doing their family planning) and has no place in secular society. you can only place “life” on a bunch of cells if u believe in the existence of souls separate from the body (ie you are a soul living in a body rather than just being your body) which again does not align w secular thought which is what laws are meant to be based on.

and in any case if there is any woman out there that wants an abortion and can’t get one and is forced to give birth to the child the quality of life of that child will probably be low. is it worth it to bring a child into an unfair life situation based on the morals of other ppl and men’s desire to force women to produce more babies to continue fueling the workforce? if anyone truly cares abt these “babies” they believe have to be born they would understand that allowing a woman to have an abortion for an unwanted pregnancy is a bigger mercy to the child than being born into an abusive environment or being put into foster care or into adoption (adoption is much more traumatic than media would have u believe) or having a mother who isn’t able to properly care for them for w/e reason. so many ppl have an inability to understand that being alive can actually be worse than nonexistence.

even more so if they want to prevent abortions from taking place instead of banning abortions (which does NOT lower the rate of abortions it only makes it more unsafe) there should be a focus on improving sex education and access to contraception for both men and women so that young ppl are better educated on how to prevent unwanted pregnancies so less will happen. lack of sex education doesn’t prevent young ppl from having sex all it does is cause them to have unprotected sex. so sex ed is a WAY better focus for preventing abortion than banning abortion but it’s not abt that anyway. it’s not abt preventing abortion at all it’s abt forcing women to have babies. and if they are more educated and not becoming pregnant they can’t be forced to have more babies (to fuel the workforce like i said).

and anyway. no woman should be forced to go thru permanent changes of her body that could result in future complications or death during the pregnancy. if a woman doesn’t want to be pregnant she shouldn’t be. period. i think abortion is beautiful and wonderful and any woman should be able to get one for any reason.

sorry for going off but like i have a VERY strong pro abortion stance i mean i have very strong feminist opinions in general but reproductive autonomy is THE basis of feminism. u cannot have feminism w/o reproductive autonomy!!!

[dangermousie]

I have been feeling in the mood for rewatching something very melo and old-school and of all possible dramas, the one that comes to mind is delightfully melo 2004 kdrama Say You Love Me with very young Kim Rae Won. 15 eps of deliciousness. The plot is take Dangerous Liasons but make it wholesome ie the best thing ever.

Kim Rae Won and Yoon So Yi are a pure and unworldly couple brought up by Buddhist monks who consider holding hands the height of sexual ecstasy. Alas, they end up in the Big City of Sin and things are about to go pear-shaped as they meet Yina, who the drama tries to claim is more complex than what she really is - a batshit secondary girl so beloved by old kdramas and yours truly. She becomes KRW's boss but does not like seeing all that pure and happy love so she asks her hot friend with benefits to seduce the girl while she decides to work on Kim Rae Won. Honestly, I watched this over a decade ago, so all I remember is monks, KRW's cheeks, happy ending with bicycles and the below scene where Lady Cougar finally gets her claws into Buddhist Virgin. (@aysekira is now groaning because I shared it with her earlier.)

So, our pure as the driven (or more aptly never driven) snow KRW brings his drunk boss to her house.

He: OK, I brought my supposedly drunk boss home, can I go now to dream of butterflies and puppies? She: I have Kim Rae Won in my house! In other words, not so fast, buster! I know the lighting is arthouse but this drama ain't!

He: OK, I really need to go home, my equally virginal gf is coming back in the morning! Maybe she will let me get to the second base, I must be ready.

She: I can talk or take my top off. It's a kdrama, so I'll talk.

Does she mean she is into bdsm? Well, at least she is being honest, even if he doesn't seem to be happy with it.

At this point, even almost a monk dude is realizing something is way off and trying to steer it into safer channels.

Seriously, adorable! I want to pinch his cheeks! So does she, even if it's a different set of cheeks.

God, I miss the craziness of old school secondary girls. They were so unhinged and glorious! Also, clearly there was no sexual harassment and hostile environment claims in old timey kdrama Korea because she's not just any cougar, she's his boss! (If you ask me what job monk educated dude of monkishess could possibly, I will frankly admit that I do not remember, and cannot honestly imagine.)

We have all so been there with truly awkward convos with insane people.

OK, I laughed. She literally pounces on him from behind like a demented bear. Btw, the fact that they are wearing about 17 layers of clothing makes it even more surreal. Between them they are exposing about three inches of skin total and that includes the noses.

Meanwhile, in case we don't get the irony, his Pure Girlfriend is gazing lovingly at his necklace and thinking 'I love my boyfriend because he'd never give up the jewel he promised to Jesus Buddha to anyone but me. Certainly not the sleazy boss lady who must have more STDs than James Bond'

Meanwhile, at the Den of Sin, Buddhist Virgin tries to extricate himself. However, he is surprisingly non-efficient for a man who's a foot taller and a good 100lb heavier. Even if his Buddhist principles prohibit punching her in the kisser, surely he can shove her or something. Or just fall backward on top of her and smoosh her.

And then she goes for the kill. I note that despite his clenching his fist in emotional agony, soon he's macking on her quite thoroughly with his mouth. That is what happens when you get abstinence only education and never enjoy yourself despite healthy libido. Your poor hormones probably go "quick quick before his beliefs suppress us again, this is our only chance!"

Birds and bees indeed! (Also, I see where your hands are, buster. They are around Ms. Cougar!)

(I half expected it to be a rose and for it to wilt or at least a petal to fall off, iykyk)

In the morning after, she is enjoying her beauty sleep and he's understandably freaking out. (Sinfully, he is now down to mere two layers of clothing and secondary girl, to show her sluttiness, is down to merely one!)

OK, I like to make fun but I do genuinely feel bad for the kid especially since I am much much older than I was when I first watch this drama and I just want to cut crusts off his sandwiches, tell him to avoid strange women and carry mace or something.

He bolts from her touch and she is genuinely surprised. I am not sure why as he's a devout dude with a serious girlfriend; if she wanted a more pleasant end to her night, she should have dragged in a character played by Jang Ki Yong, who's sort of made a niche for a younger hunk rejoicing in casually being banged by older ladies. (If you want to feel really old, Jang Ki Yong was 11 when this drama came out. You are welcome.)

If you think this face means realized this was a dumb choice and unlikely to lead to anything good, you are not familiar with old time kdramas. I genuinely do not get her obsession because sure KRW is cute as hell but the sex couldn't have been much good and he generally treats her as a leper.

His gf comes home but he doesn't meet her because he is too dirty and unworthy to see her!

And then they talked it out and worked it out.

Ha!!!! This is a 15 ep drama, we are only getting started baby!

So yeah, watch me rewatch this insanity.

[punkscowardschampions]

Sylke pt.2 & Slaggie & Sylke again

Jake: [‘I just need to be with you that much’ ie how much she misses him, the exact same amount, doing a happy sigh about it because he is and they are together again, playing with her hair with the same soft but insistent energy]

Sylvie: [‘how are you feeling now?’ as a genuine question, even if you’re here still doing the most with how you’re not sitting still and keep kissing him without warning so !!]

Jake: [‘better’ because he do, and also because it’s an echo of what he said when he woke up from that fire nap, likewise not sitting still because he can’t and kissing her everywhere his necklace is sitting from the back of her neck to the lowest point it hangs] 

Sylvie: [‘enough to take me out?’ because even though you love nothing more than being alone with this boy to be feral, this is going to be a big milestone for him to get back out there and you want it for him, doing a BIG BREATH out when he’s basically on your chest]

Jake: [a nod as an excuse to nuzzle into her even more and do the most with these kisses that keep getting more and more !! because y’all are, but you do also genuinely mean it that you do feel like you can do this now that you’ve clearly finished the song and are happy with it and you’ve seen her which gives you all the confidence back that she’ll like it when she hears it, LOOKING up at her as he says his not at all casual ‘yeah’]

Sylvie: [‘shame’ but you can hear the smile with the dramatic but real sigh too so you know she’s not seriously like well I don’t want to because she do and for reasons beyond helping you, she also wants to hear this song because you were not on our radar before like that and also have a sneaking suspicion it is going to be somewhat about us, don’t need a huge ego to imagine that it will at least reference the journey y’all have been on privately, biting your lip as you return this LOOK before leaning in to bite his in a similar fashion about it ‘cool’ as punctuation before you’re making out again]

Jake: [just be here having a makeout sesh that you can put all your emotions about this performance and this girl into because I’m not letting your extra ass verbalise them rn hun, as usual no fucks given to wherever you’re sat or the fact anyone could walk past you cos it’s not late remotely yet]

Sylvie: [very much giving teenage nuisance wherever y’all are right now and we love to see it, placing his hands on our waist as we’re putting ours under your shirt to touch your chest, to feel if your heart is going as insane as our own]

Jake: [mhmm, soz not soz everyone but that’s exactly their entire vibe in this era, her having literally nearly died and him knowing he suddenly could, they simply don’t give a fuck rn I’m afraid, he’ll be here not caring about anything except trying to PULL her closer to him via her waist as if that’s possible]

Sylvie: [and I fail to see how you could, hence we’re out here being reckless and I’ve tried to show it with you being kind of a shit friend and daughter atm without being like FUCK Y’ALL ‘cos it isn’t about other people it’s about your own mortality, ANYWAY, your outfit was a skirt for a reason so be here just teasing him/yourself in the most blatant way, pouting like he’s doing it to you]

Jake: [I think you’ve done an excellent job of showing it, I’ve likewise tried to with his out of character behaviour of not going to school, treating your fam and China how you would’ve never had this not happened etc, and the song will too because it’s blatant and reckless in itself just revealing all your feelings like that so fast, ANYWAY, be here not at all subtly touching the inner thigh lovebite you gave her, gently so it’s teasing too]

Sylvie: [likewise I think you have done brilliant, my boo, go us; the ‘fuck’ you have to breathe out about it like he’s doing the most he’s ever done because clearly cannot be separated for any length of time, it is too long and we will lose it]

Jake: [we have done so well with this reboot truly and I’m so glad, catch him not doing the most he’s ever done but touching her over her underwear like they aren’t in too public of a place for this, keeping it soft and slow, almost lazily as if they have all the time in the world for him to keep teasing her like this when they in fact do not]

Sylvie: [‘I already have to miss you on stage’ said in a be nice tone like you aren’t actively moving against his fingers way harder than he’s intending to touch you anyway]

Jake: [‘you don’t’ as if he’s fully intending to be even more blatant about this and bring her out of stage with him to literally serenade her despite them saying they were gonna keep it lowkey and secret haha]

Sylvie: [just raising your brows in response like oh really? Tracing the outline of his dick over his clothes as you tilt your head to the side like you’re thinking ‘could be distracting’]

Jake: [smile at that eyebrow raise as if this is all so casual and his eyes aren’t !! like do you dare me to directly serenade you in front of everyone ‘you’d have the same effect if I played [idk the biggest venue there is in Paris being the vibe, just giving regardless if the crowd had a shit load of peeps in]’]

Sylvie: [trying to give nothing away because do you dare him, do you not, you don’t even know, you know that it makes you feel some type of way in theory though and you are PRESSING so hard in response to what he says ‘maybe I will’]

Jake: [mhmm because likewise do you actually dare sir but we’re living in the fantasy of yes as hard as the having sex on stage or at school fantasies atm regardless, hence not teasing her at all with these touches anymore, going as hard as he can in fact while still keeping the clothes barrier there for now, his other hand going back to the necklace because he’s wondering if he should let her keep this on as part of her lewk too]

Sylvie: [we’re all in our fantasy and in our fantasy there is no downside, only the hotness that can be imagined by our extra brain, making a silent !! noise that comes out as nothing but your mouth being fully open in a moan and the croak of your breathing getting caught in your throat, putting your other hand over his on this necklace, like let me keep it on, without having to say those words]

Jake: [lbr he wasn’t going to say no to her anyway but he especially isn’t now in this moment when he can likewise only fully moan her nickname into her ear as a yes, while pulling again on this necklace and continuing to do the most here with the other, moving her underwear to the side but not touching her yet, instead PRESSING hard into this inner thigh lovebite while he pushes his crotch into hers]

Sylvie: [volleying his own name back at him so naturally at this point we’re not even thinking about it just feeling it all, GASPING and hugging his body tighter to yours to not make more unhinged noise about it ‘are you changing?’ with a breathless lol because we know if you’re going to do this it’s going to get messy for you]

Jake: [‘do you want me to?’ the unspoken or do you want me to be a mess all night in ways that only we fully appreciate being unspoken but hanging there between them in his LOOK and the most mischievous smile he has ever done in his life]

Sylvie: [the biggest heart eyes you have ever done at this boy because love his mischievous smile so much already that at this level it is KILLING you, shaking your head ‘I want you to wear it like it’s yours’]

Jake: [the way those heart eyes have him GRIPPING both of her thighs hard enough to bruise and pulling her into him so dramatically that they could both fall off wherever the hell they’re sitting because cannot cope before she’s even said the words he knew she’d say, squeezing his own eyes shut for a sec and clenching his jaw so he doesn’t make the most unhinged noise ever about it all]

Sylvie: [all the swear words spilling from your lips about how you feel about the way he’s bruising you right now, moving as ferally with it, no attempt at looking cute or being in control about it you just gotta right now immediately, stroking his jaw so softly in contrast even if the energy is still very !!]

Jake: [too into all these swear words and wanting to hear them all so kissing her neck and throat instead, shamelessly so that this chain gets covered in spit in the process we all know that’s as much the reason cos if you’re gonna be messy then she is too, finally kissing her on the mouth when she’s stroking his jaw because the softness is getting to you, hence it’s such a romantic and almost chaste mouth kiss compared to the ones he was doing before]

Sylvie: [‘I’m almost embarrassed by how it sounds’ because we know if we’re out here listening to you cursing his name in the best way, we’re also here hearing how wet you are about all this, getting even more excited about this chaste kiss, trying to match the energy]

Jake: [doing the hottest shh like no don’t be ‘I’d listen to every sound you make [more times than they have ever looped anything being the number he says] times’ because love them all]

Sylvie: [‘you like how I am’ not as a question because he clearly does and we’re obsessed with the fact, kissing along his jawline very gently, best behaviour, obviously, like you’re not grinding against his crotch so hard at the same time]

Jake: [a noise of agreement that just turns into a NOISE because of both things she’s doing and who can say if it’s the softness or the feralness getting to him more now, giving her earlobe a lil but !! nip because simply must]

Sylvie: [doing a NOISE of surprise at this nip, pushing down hard into his lap too ‘Jake’ like omg but you’re into it, doing a lil smirk up at him]

Jake: [doing a hot lol because you feel vaguely hysterical like who are we/where are we/what are we doing in the best ways, pulling her earlobe back into his mouth and sucking it like he’s kissing it better and not just overwhelmed]

Sylvie: [giving him a look like I am in the same boat because truly, never felt something harder ‘am I being mean to you again?’ tugging on the waistband of what he’s still fully wearing like you must be uncomfortable, breathing a little heavier about this ‘I could help you out’]

Jake: [doing a GASP of his own because drawing attention to how much he’s wearing rn does exactly that so he can’t help feeling it even more ‘you did swear you’d start behaving’ because as good as from the second she got here, the facade of being bad couldn’t be kept up] 

Sylvie: [spinning this necklace around at the word behave absentmindedly, just THINKING about that moment again as you’re unzipping enough to get your hands underneath all his clothes to finally touch him, shaking about it slightly, nbd ‘behaving for only you hits different’]

Jake: [We all know he’s THINKING about it too + her wearing his necklace and his jacket tonight in front of his friends who could so easily notice they are both his, hence moaning before she’s even touched him and then unable to not move against her hands so dramatically]

Sylvie: [having to press your face into his shoulder, nipping him slightly about how hot that looked and felt, immediately doing the most with both hands for him ‘I need you all to myself, for this to be mine as much as this is yours’ pushing against the exposed skin of his lower stomach for emphasis and to make him even messier]

Jake: [doing a shiver at the wetness hitting his bare skin for the first time, SO into it he’s basically looking at her like 🥺 absolutely unaware that his face is doing that, grabbing her hips and pushing her against that same spot with even more !! getting a rhythm going so the sounds of that and his breathing could be a song in themselves]

Sylvie: [‘you’re pretty’ as a response to his 🥺 face that you can’t keep in, especially not when a rhythm is being found, touching his throat really softly to feel his breathing, pushing down barely at all but enough to know how hard you’re fighting to maintain some sense of control here]

Jake: [using his thumb to give her all the clittoral stimulation she could possibly need in response to being called pretty as if he’s saying she’s prettier, applying more pressure when he feels it on his throat like this is a new rhythm they’ve just found]

Sylvie: [gripping his throat as tightly as you are his dick when he adds his thumb, if only for a moment before you try to gain composure, the GASP is nearly loud enough to be a kind of scream too]

Jake: [waiting to say ‘you’re prettier’ when she’s holding his throat like that for how it’ll sound and feel, plus he can’t help it when she’s almost screaming in these streets, curling 2 fingers into her as well just because he can]

Sylvie: [your eyes rolling to the back of your head about it, frenziedly moving your hand from his throat to his mouth, sticking the same two fingers between his lips to replicate what he’s doing and what your whole body is trembling about]

Jake: [again moaning her nickname around her fingers for her for the muffled and unhinged sound of it because we’re all feeling very extra as we listen to how it would sound given how !! those fingers of his inside her are moving, excuse them everyone they’ve once again lost it and forgotten their surroundings entirely, mind your business if you hear anything please]

Sylvie: [‘that’s my boy’ as you’re pushing these fingers as far as you can, trying to get them soaked in spit so you can use them on him even if right now you’re having too much fun fucking his mouth ‘that’s my boy’ repeated but said with such different energy, practically being fucked out of you now, no care given to anything but how this all feels]

Jake: [‘that’s my girl’ being said when she’s repeated herself but barely can get the words out like he’s so proud of her for how feral she’s being and how close she is to fully losing it because he is, his other hand going up under her top to play with her nip knowing that the overstimulation will really get her]

Sylvie: [not you taking these fingers soaked in his spit and instead attempting to fit them inside you whilst his also are, wrapping them around his inside you because you cannot believe you’ve managed to even slightly do that, ‘are you proud of me?’]

Jake: [catch him in the same utterly unhinged manner trying to also fit his dick inside of her too, his body just reacting totally involuntarily and trying to push himself in with no thought whatsoever only !! repeating ‘that’s my girl’ because she said it twice, like he’s the proudest he’s ever been, even if his voice is catching a little at the antics he’s trying to do]

Sylvie: [LOSING it at the fact he’s reacting like this and the way it would feel that he’s attempting this ‘you’ll stretch me inside out’ not said like a stop but like you want it so badly because right now you do]

Jake: [we all know he wants it as badly however much of a logistical nightmare it is and how unlikely to succeed he is, having to KISS her so he doesn’t make the loudest noise ever at what she said and how she said it, pushing his tongue into her mouth the way he can’t fit inside her any other way, so dramatically so that it’s halfway down her throat]

Sylvie: [untangling your fingers to see how easily you can get them into your booty with how turned on and wet everything is down there, not you desperately trying to make this happen when it does not need to but you truly feel as though it must rn, thank GOD he is kissing you before you can make your own deranged noises about how it feels, the way it is impossible for you to NOT bite on his tongue in this moment]

Jake: [we’ve truly reached feral o clock here lads, god bless, at least with her fingers moving you will be able to get inside her and I’m gonna say y’all do be falling off the little wall or whatever you were sitting on with the !! of it so she’ll be getting winded in every sense, hitting the floor and how deeply he’s suddenly inside her from that fall, thank god she didn’t bite his tongue in that moment because he wouldn’t have one left lol, love that this isn’t remotely stopping you, just going at it here like you were here all along]

Sylvie: [you cumming instantly on the cold hard ground is only appropriate for how insane you got there, in actual shock about it whilst telling him not to stop in the weakest voice of all time because you are so beyond dead]

Jake: [I’m so glad he won’t be far behind her because y’all don’t have all day anyone could walk past you’ve gotta get up lol, if he wasn’t close enough to losing it already, the way she tells him not to stop despite being clearly that dead will help, me here shaking my head annoyed at the fact you’ve been given condoms that y’all are yet to use, I’m too old for this reckless behaviour guys, as well as knowing he’ll be lying here dead too instead of getting up ASAP and helping her up]

Sylvie: [my boo says I am fuming at your behaviour frankly and she’s not wrong lol, you’ll have to start giving a shit at some point lads but today is evidently not that day, I’m afraid, trying to catch your breath but you only start to laugh which doesn’t help matters, rolling onto your side to look at him like are you also still alive, just about?]

Jake: [mhmm, I’m sick of y’all’s behaviour but as we’ve discussed it’s too real for you for it not to be a thing atm, therefore join her in loling while you pick some random scut off your/her jacket because you’re on the cold hard ground and there is bound to be]

Sylvie: [offer a hand to help pick him up as you pick yourself up, brushing the grass/dirt/etc off yourself more thoroughly, getting some from his hair and shaking your head like oh you, as if you played no part in what just occurred]

Jake: [take her hand and get yourself up, dress yourself so you’re not stood here trousers down for the rest of your life and brush yourself down too like you can see her doing, shake your head at her like a wet dog or someone rocking out with a grin]

Sylvie: [‘save it for the stage’ as you push him away from you like he is a wet dog and you don’t wanna get soaked but obviously you have to pull him back in to readjust his top half of his fit somehow, however necessary that may actually be]

Jake: [taking the hand she offered to you to help you up whether or not she is literally still mid fixing your clothes for you and hold it, closing this nonexistent gap even more as you pull her into you via it as if you don’t she’s gonna vanish or something because how unreal everything y’all do feels, then, after a deep breath that’s giving the breathing exercises, start walking and handholding as if you’ve gotta take to the stage immediately]

Sylvie: [copy his deep breath because you truly need to, before you’re pulling him back like woah woah, giving him a look like oi and gesturing at your body like am I decent or nah because short skirt that you don’t even know if it’s covering all the damage y’all just did]

Jake: [take his moment to really indecently look her up and down, LINGERING over it for what would feel like forever, then reaching under this skirt to readjust her underwear whether that’s actually needed or not, just to do it for the mems and the reminders, before readjusting and pulling her skirt down too so it covers her as much as it can, pulling her back into him via the waistband of it like okay, are you happy now?]

Sylvie: [reflexively gripping your thighs around his hand so then you have to let him go with a sheepish grin, blushing as you nod like all better, reaching out to hold his hand again ‘do I need to go home and put makeup on or?’ because you are not a dressy kind of gal but maybe he wants you to be for tonight]

Jake: [stroking her blush with the same hand before you take hers to hand hold again with a shake of your head because the makeup question is genuinely casual, he could not care less nor does he think you need to do a thing ‘you still look really pretty’ as a throwback to calling her the prettiest earlier like no no, emphasis on the really as always]

Sylvie: [genuinely blushing the reddest you have ever, shaking your head and going to start to say shut up but instead doing the psh sort of noise because despite how absolutely feral you just behaved, that compliment being that wholesome is what gets you here]

Jake: [‘you are, believe me’ saying it casual but adding the believe me how they have multiple times before so she knows it isn’t as they handhold and walk again] 

Sylvie: [not saying anything in reply but looking up and catching his eye briefly as you walk before smiling down as you keep walking ‘Do you think there’s going to be afters?’ just realising y’all may be invited somewhere else after this and you don’t know if you wanna be around other people THAT long lol]

Jake: [‘probably, but we don’t have to go’ as if it’s that simple because to him it is, y’all are gonna do exactly what you want and no more or no less]

Sylvie: [‘we can’ with the same energy because don’t want to accidentally trap him into not just because we don’t want to and we hope he doesn’t]

Jake: [‘we can’t’ said like I never promised to behave that long, with a totally unnecessary tug on the necklace as they walk because I’m sure she would have got his meaning perfectly fine without it lol, point being he doesn’t want to either]

Sylvie: [laughing, so heart eyes about it all, keep looking at him instead of where you’re going casually, don’t trip gal ‘thank god’ and doing a little skip ‘sharing’s only so fun’]

Jake: [not you literally putting your other arm around her so she doesn’t trip, casually as if she won’t notice, but obvs you can’t help pulling her into your side as y’all walk because she’s being so cute and she’s so right]

Sylvie: [tucking yourself under his arm like you have numerous times on your sofa or in your bed but never out in public like this which makes this all the more !! however casual we’re pretending to be here]

Jake: [likewise pretending this is super chill and casual even though he’s blatantly as !! which we know because however far they get like that, which I’m actually vibing is quite far so well done Jacob, he eventually cannot resist stopping and kissing her to get some of the !! out]

Sylvie: [for you two this is very impressive self-restraint tbh, no tea no shade, hence we will let you have your little makeout session about the FEELINGS you are not discussing rn]

Jake: [not gonna let you get too carried away though but there can be people around, the way y’all are welcome there wasn’t earlier, to get you walking again]

Sylvie: [you can’t always be so lucky, even if we must teasingly be in his ear saying what we would be doing if these people weren’t here]

Jake: [the way he’s pulling on this necklace like she’s being the baddest for saying all this when we know he’s actually doing it because he’s so into it, not at all casually choking his girl as if that’s any more chill than the makeout sesh we just stopped haha]

Sylvie: [at least she is blatantly into it so passers-by can continue to mind their business about it, just seeing how long you can actually be in his ear before you can’t speak due to this]

Jake: [not at all casual competition, we love to see it]

Sylvie: [do you want to skip to the actual gig or after or what’s the tea]

Jake: [well I imagine he’s planning to rock up just before he’s on, rudely, so that he doesn’t have to talk to loads of his friends or have time to get nervous, and I’m sure he’s likewise planning to leave as soon after as they feasibly can, hilarious because this boy is literally singing 1 song, there is no point him going if he wasn’t gonna make a night or it before or after, but we get why for sick kid as well as this new romance reasons, so unless you wanna do her reaction to the song in the immediate aftermath of hearing it, we can skip to after or whenever we want tbh]

Sylvie: Did last night really happen?

Sylvie: Or am I in an induced coma, you can tell me

Maggie: I told you already you’re his new muse, like

Sylvie: Okay, you so did not see that coming

Maggie: I did, I said his song’d be all about you and it was

Sylvie: Not like that though, I didn’t know it would be like that

Maggie: In fairness, none of us could know how much heart he was gonna wear on his sleeve, bold move, give the lad that

Sylvie: You reckon he’s full of it?

Maggie: Creative break up strategy, but nah

Maggie: she walked in knowing, I saw her

Sylvie: That’s not what it was, they’d already broken up

Sylvie: He didn’t think she’d show, I didn’t know she had

Maggie: You never showed yourselves ‘til he was due on the stage

Maggie: wasn’t about her, sure enough, if anybody needed more proof

Sylvie: She’s hardly a saint, they both participated in the lying and the using bullshit, that’s why it’s better it’s over

Maggie: You’ll not catch us using the s word for nobody, even [the lad she fancies who was maybe going], good boy that he's

Sylvie: Jake is going to feel bad now

Sylvie: why would she show her face, it’s so bizarre 

Maggie: Soon made it scarce running off with that tatted lad they all hang themselves off of, made me feel bad, old enough to be her weird uncle we all of us have 😬

Sylvie: Wow, did she now

Maggie: I’d have done something, but who’s she to me?

Sylvie: She’s already been there, he’s the reason they broke up the first time, like

Maggie: Oh right

Sylvie: And they broke up this time because she suddenly wanted to go home, after moving herself in for her alleged safety so

Sylvie: shines a different light on it

Maggie: Poor Jacob thought he was playing the hero but he’s been made the 🤡

Sylvie: What an evil cow, you don’t pretend to be being abused to move in to someone’s house

Maggie: He’s better off well out of it, like you said

Maggie: the girl’s got some issues

Sylvie: At least everyone saw, it’d sound malicious coming straight from me but Jesus

Sylvie: Embarrassed by her shit taste that she wants Cian that badly

Maggie: Maybe the town can get off my back now 😏

Maggie: but in seriousness, it’ll be cos he’s grown enough to have his own place

Sylvie: I don’t even buy it, it’s just his age pure and simple, makes her think she’s mature, whatever

Sylvie: he lives in a house share with like 5 other lads, what’s safe about that then?

Maggie: Head in a big 📚 weren’t cutting it as far as a way to look down on the rest who don’t hate it here and ain’t after getting out straight from their 18th party, he’ll do for next accessory 

Sylvie: Be ditching him as soon as ‘cos where’s the lad going but inside? It’s not like he’s some Trinity student she’s bagged, who’s she fooling with it

Maggie: I’ve heard he’s the softest lad going, don’t ask how he’s all that ink on himself without tears in the chair

Sylvie: He’d need to be, deal with these teenage dramatics

Maggie: Don’t sit right with us, have yourself some mates your own age, boy

Sylvie: You do know it’s the same age difference your parents had, and your mammy was your age, like

Maggie: You’ve met my parents, she was my age going on hers now

Maggie: can be exceptions to the rule without exceptions for lads like Cian

Sylvie: Maybe he has the mental age of a 14 year old, seems legit

Sylvie: Let’s not victimise her when she’s anything but

Maggie: He might, he’d not be alone there

Maggie: you don’t like her, she’s done nothing to me

Sylvie: Bad people are bad people, I don’t need to be personally victimised, in fact I haven’t been

Maggie: If there’s such a thing as bad people, all of us are

Sylvie: There’s no need to be Catholic about it

Sylvie: she’s in the wrong, is all I mean

Maggie: She is, don’t mean I’m 🙏 for her downfall

Maggie: nor do yous have the need, you’re happy, forget about her

Sylvie: You said it, she’s hurt Jake and made him look ridiculous, that matters to me

Maggie: And you said he’s done his own wrong, but it’s over with

Sylvie: It’s hardly the same

Maggie: I’m hardly here with a pen and paper doing ‘em a column each, am I now?

Sylvie: It’s just bullshit the notion she gets off the hook because she apparently got her feelings hurt last night

Maggie: Who’s letting her off what hook? Come on, you’ve the knowing as well as I that their mates’ll side with him again

Maggie: all she’ll have’s the lad and he’s no prize

Sylvie: But why do you feel sorry for her, she literally made all this happen

Maggie: It’s a sorry state, I’m not buzzing to see no one alone

Sylvie: She isn’t, she has Cian and has had him all along, clearly

Maggie: Yeah, dead comforting 🙄

Maggie: you still need mates, always

Sylvie: If that’s what she wants, who are you to say she’s wrong

Sylvie: You have to be a good friend to have good friends, again, it’s no one else’s fault

Maggie: Alright, I’m not about to fall out with you in defence of her, I don’t even know the girl

Sylvie: You’re the one rushing to it

Maggie: Am I only to agree with you now? I’m sorry, I didn’t realise that’s what good friends meant, like

Sylvie: Who are you trying to impress with the virtue signalling?

Maggie: Who are you, trying to tell me how to think?

Sylvie: It’s clear what you think

Maggie: Ah sure, hang with Jake’s crowd, they all have the same opinion, you’ll be grand

Sylvie: I’ve never met anyone who likes playing the hero more than you, and for what?

Sylvie: Siding with some girl who wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire, okay, your priorities, your choice

Maggie: Jesus, I’m not siding with her

Sylvie: You may as well own it, Mags

Maggie: Own that you think I’m that arsehole and you’ve been harbouring it for a time like this?

Sylvie: You think I’m worse

Maggie: When have I said that?

Sylvie: You don’t need to put it in words when you should be happy for me being happy but you keep bringing her up at every opportunity instead

Sylvie: I can fill in the blanks

Maggie: It was me who told you to be happy and leave her

Sylvie: Yeah, exactly

Maggie: What’s so wrong with it?

Sylvie: Like I’m causing problems, I haven’t done anything wrong and you are acting as if I have

Maggie: No, she’s caused her own and she’ll have her own consequences to live with, joining in bad mouthing her has nothing to do with none of it, as you properly poetically put it, she don’t care

Sylvie: Who’s bad-mouthing her? It’s what she did, your need to stick up for her is the only thing causing issue here

Maggie: I’m not sticking up for her

Sylvie: Whatever, this isn’t worth going over again

Maggie: It ain’t, there we can agree

Sylvie: Hooray

Maggie: Yeah, thanks a million

Sylvie: What do you expect?

Maggie: Some sort of benefit of the doubt, maybe

Maggie: cos I’ve been on your side since forever

Sylvie: Likewise

Maggie: It’s not that deep, I can feel bad for her and not want to be her mate

Sylvie: I’m over this

Maggie: We don’t need to talk it to death, if you’re not planning to hold a grudge against me, but if you are, then

Sylvie: It’s fine, forget about it

Maggie: No

Maggie: ‘course I won’t

Sylvie: I don’t have anything else to say about it

Maggie: That’s different to not having anything else to say to me, at least, it should be

Sylvie: I just need some time to deal with all this 

Maggie: Okay, I’ll be here on a different hill from the one you reckon I’ve chosen to die on, when you’re after talking again

Sylvie: Why are you being dramatic now?

Maggie: You act like I’m to go back in my box when you’re done talking about what you want to

Sylvie: I’m busy, we didn’t even know she was here, there’s kind of a lot to deal with now

Maggie: Me too, not that you’d know either

Sylvie: Well, then… I don’t get what the issue is

Maggie: I can tell

Maggie: Christ, you call me out like I’m the worst friend and person in this town, but you don’t ask a thing about me, never, since, I don’t know when

Sylvie: You think I’m the worst, I know, that was my damn point

Maggie: I think this is pointless

Sylvie: Bye then, we’ve both things on, why waste time pretending

Maggie: Later 

Sylvie: I guess you’ve been told already

Sylvie: My cousin just informed me so, everyone must know

Jake: Yeah

Sylvie: Are you okay? Are you going to talk to her?

Jake: Not really

Jake: And say what, I hope you and Cian are super happy together?

Sylvie: No, of course you’re not

Sylvie: I’m sorry

Jake: I asked her if she wanted to be with someone older, she said it wasn’t like that, he’s just like a brother to everyone or whatever

Sylvie: I don’t understand why she came back, that’s just cruel

Jake: I don’t know, maybe she’s cruel and I just couldn’t see it before

Sylvie: She was pretending to be someone for you, I think that’s fair to say at this point

Jake: I don’t want to talk about her anymore, my friends won’t shut up about it

Sylvie: We should go somewhere

Sylvie: let her deal with the fallout

Jake: Paris

Sylvie: Let’s go

Jake: Let me know when you’re packed

Sylvie: We barely need anything, I’ll just take my school bag’s worth of clothes

Jake: Cool

Sylvie: I promise, you’ll forget about all the bullshit before we’ve landed

Jake: I believe you

Sylvie: You don’t have to, I’ll make it happen

Sylvie: Fuck this town, and fuck the noise that’s not you singing to me

Jake: I’ll sing to you in French

Sylvie: You can’t make it any more perfect, I won’t cope

Jake: Perfect?

Sylvie: Absolutely

Sylvie: Nothing can touch it, not for me

Jake: Then I don’t care what else happened

Sylvie: I don’t mind, I can handle it

Jake: I mind, it was meant to be our night

Sylvie: It was, it’s a retrospect

Sylvie: a shit one

Jake: She only came to leave with him, I thought she cared about me

Sylvie: It’s horrible, unacceptably mean

Jake: My sister told me it’s my fault, that she probably came to make up before hearing your song

Sylvie: How does that make it okay?

Sylvie: Or account for the fact she had Cian on the backburner ready to go, clearly

Jake: It doesn’t, but just because she’s the girl she’s being sided with

Sylvie: Sorry, that’s just wrong

Sylvie: She clearly did what she swore she didn’t the first time, how can you say that’s okay

Jake: Apparently I’m wronger

Sylvie: I thought your sister would have your back on this, see how humiliating this is for you

Jake: Yeah, me too

Jake: I had hers when she got cheated on and her heart broken

Sylvie: Some girls will always side with girls, even when it’s not the right thing to do

Jake: I should know better, was raised better, she said

Jake: So what, I’m not allowed to make a mistake ever?

Sylvie: Better for what?

Sylvie: Using for a bed until she’s bored of you

Sylvie: Didn’t she want her out of your house like 5 minutes ago?

Jake: I can’t do anything right since I got sick, she’s mad at me all the time, no matter what

Sylvie: Everyone is mad at me too

Sylvie: I’m the maddest, none of you are actually sick, sorry it’s such an inconvenience though

Jake: I’m sorry I’m not actually perfect and they can finally see it now

Sylvie: It’s fucked up

Sylvie: I can’t stand being here anymore

Jake: We’re leaving

Sylvie: I want you as you are, not some projection of expectations 

Jake: I want you as you are, end of sentence

Sylvie: I couldn’t care less, what anyone thinks, any of the hot takes, we know what happened, all of it

Jake: And we know what’s important and what isn’t

Sylvie: I know how lucky I am to have you

Jake: Luck’s chance, you have me through your own actions, and mine

Jake: we did this, and the only thing I’d change is that I wouldn’t stop myself from kissing you

Sylvie: It just shows what a bad guy you aren’t, not that anyone seems to give a shit

Sylvie: so yeah, I’ll change it too

Jake: You know and you care who I am, I don’t give a shit if anyone else does, not now

Sylvie: I’m just so angry that people can’t see that you’re the one that’s been hurt the most by this, that’s all

Sylvie: I can’t stop feeling so pissed off

Jake: You don’t have to stop, you can be angry

Jake: people telling you to feel different because it’s what they want are the ones who are wrong, I can handle it

Sylvie: My cousin just implied I’m jealous of China and that’s why I’m mad about it, which is so far from the truth

Sylvie: I’m allowed to be mad, it’s for you, not myself

Jake: Jealous of what?

Sylvie: I don’t even know, that I’m the other woman to her girlfriend, even now it’s not true anymore, it was, I guess?

Jake: That’s dumb

Sylvie: I know, everyone is being about this

Jake: What’s so hard to understand? I don’t get it

Sylvie: People want us to be the bad guys for the crossover

Sylvie: every relationship I know has it, people just convince themselves they didn’t cheat because xyz

Jake: Exactly, it just happened, it just happens

Sylvie: We were upfront about it, you ended things

Sylvie: she wasn’t, in my opinion, that’s what counts

Jake: She kept lying, I didn’t

Sylvie: We know what we did, we’ve got nothing to hide, she still is

Jake: Are you packed? I wanna go

Sylvie: Where do you want to meet?

Sylvie: Feel like your sister is going to lecture me if I come to yours

Jake: [somewhere random where you’re not gonna run into any of your friends, clearly, being the idea, it’s giving a shop they wouldn’t be seen dead]

Sylvie: I’d go to [a really, really cringe shop] for you

Jake: I’d go to [an even cringer place] for you

Sylvie: 😍

Sylvie: Have I mentioned how into you I am?

Jake: I don’t think so

Sylvie: That should have been the first thing I said, another reason I’m so mad at everyone but you

Jake: Tell me now, it’s the only thing I want to hear

Sylvie: I think I’m obsessed with you, well, I know I am

Sylvie: You are so incredible

Jake: [not you quoting your own song rn like I’m as obsessed with you, I dread to think what lyrics you’re throwing out haha]

Sylvie: [quoting back another bit that you LOVED and thus have memorised already]

Jake: You know it by heart

Sylvie: It’s for me

Sylvie: you can show me how to play it too

Jake: You won’t be offended this time?

Sylvie: It’s different in Paris

Jake: Everything’ll be

Sylvie: Not us, we’ll be the same, nothing is touching this

Jake: You’d still be the coolest even if you changed

Sylvie: There’s no one else I would do this with and for

Jake: I hope not

Sylvie: You know, it’s you

Jake: Yeah, it’s you too

Sylvie: I do, and now everyone knows, you don’t have to keep it a secret, you don’t owe anyone anything

Jake: You’re my official girlfriend

Sylvie: We could post [and send him the picture he took of y’all after your first time]

Sylvie: if we wanted

Jake: We can post [pics everywhere in Paris he said he wanted to go in their previous convo about it]

Sylvie: [add places]

Jake: [add some more because I’m sure you’ve been doing your research since and always because highkey about this]

Sylvie: I can’t wait

Jake: I can’t wait to see you

Sylvie: I don’t want to come back

Jake: Without a return ticket we can’t

Sylvie: We can live [giving bohemian artist french vibes]

Jake: [do a lil day in the life that fully leans into those boho french artist vibes, we know what I’m saying, we’re in this fantasy]

Sylvie: Say you mean it

Jake: I mean every word

Sylvie: I need you so much

Jake: You know I need you as much

Sylvie: I’m gonna make you feel so good

Jake: You do

Sylvie: More

Jake: I’m pretty sure I couldn’t take any more

Sylvie: Me either but you keep proving me wrong

Jake: I told you how I feel about winning you over

Sylvie: I feel bad that I didn’t make it more challenging for you

Sylvie: Shall I start now?

Jake: It’s too late for that

Sylvie: Is it though

Jake: You can’t like to win more than you like me, I don’t believe it

Sylvie: I’ll never tell 😶

Jake: I think you will, you like to be good more than anything

Sylvie: As much as winning?

Jake: The most

Sylvie: Yeah

Sylvie: Though I can’t believe I’m saying that, you’ve truly turned me upside down and inside out, Jacob Cohen

Jake: You’re full naming me, I must’ve 

Sylvie: Well, it is very serious

Jake: Which is why you belong in Paris

Sylvie: [say how far away you are from where you’re meeting like there’s nothing else stopping you but this short distance]

Jake: [likewise say how far away you are, but I will have to find a way to stop y’all cos you’re not going yet]

Sylvie: [I don’t even know if y’all can board a plane at your young age without escorts so like, haven’t thought that through, have you, I feel like there must be some procedure to be like um there’s two children here tryna leave the country, is anyone getting them the other end or?]

Jake: [exactly, or there could be no flights to Paris for ages from when y’all get to the airport during which time any of your fam could be like um where are you and what are you doing, there’s lots of ways we could cockblock]

Sylvie: [and we must because not today sweeties]

Sylvie: Will you write a song about this, about leaving?

Jake: We could write it together

Sylvie: You trust me not to fuck with your vision, huh

Jake: Yeah

Jake: my vision’s the clearest it’s ever been and [the song he wrote for her] is my best song

Sylvie: No bullshit?

Jake: I wouldn’t, it’s true

Sylvie: I thought it was incredible

Jake: I think you’re incredible

Sylvie: You’re going to make me blush

Jake: I’d write a whole song about that if you wanted

Sylvie: I like hearing what you think, without my input

Sylvie: but maybe I’ll write something for you too

Jake: Cool, I like the sound of being written about too

Sylvie: It’s only a maybe

Jake: Of maybe being written about then

Sylvie: I’ll write it but you might not be able to see it

Jake: Why? You trust me, I know that

Sylvie: I trust you, yeah

Jake: What do you think’s going to happen if I read what you’ve written?

Sylvie: I won’t want you to, if it’s bad, that’s all

Jake: It won’t be

Sylvie: And how do you know that?

Jake: I know you

Sylvie: I want you to, more than anyone

Jake: You’ve floored me with things you’ve written when we’re just talking

Sylvie: I know it’s stupid but not saying it is feeling more so I will

Sylvie: I don’t want you to compare me to her

Jake: I’d be stupider to do that

Sylvie: To my face, obviously

Sylvie: but I assume it’s easily done and I don’t want to make it easier, if that makes sense

Jake: It wouldn’t come easy to me, you couldn’t be more different to her

Sylvie: I didn’t mean to sound that insecure

Jake: It’s natural, we just broke up and she was important to me

Sylvie: And I’m okay with that, obviously, I don’t want to sound like I’m not

Jake: I’d hate for you to compare me with anyone either, unless it’s [the movie character y’all like being compared to]

Sylvie: I can agree to those terms if you can

Jake: Deal

Sylvie: I can’t think of anyone else appropriate, so it won’t be difficult

Jake: What about [not you suggesting the singer of y’all’s song like hehe aren’t I as good as them, no sir you absolutely are not]?

Sylvie: I might need you to play me the song a few more times before I can make that call

Jake: I’m bringing my guitar

Sylvie: Of course

Jake: Put a hat down and everyone can help you make the call

Sylvie: Gotta eat sometime

Jake: I’ll have to give up being vegan once we get to Paris or there’ll be basically nothing I can eat

Sylvie: For real

Sylvie: Will that be okay?

Jake: I mean, it’ll be kinda weird at first but I’ll get used to it again

Sylvie: You don’t have to start indulging in foie gras but you don’t wanna die, like

Jake: I can’t die, you need me

Sylvie: I won’t let it happen

Jake: Being a vegan sorta just happened to me anyway, my sister thought it was cool when she was like 10/11 and I copied everything she did, being younger and thinking she was the coolest

Sylvie: That’s super cute

Jake: Maybe, but I didn’t really think about it

Sylvie: You can rethink it now

Sylvie: if this sick kid bullshit has offered anything, it is that

Jake: It’s been a positive so far

Sylvie: I was wondering, if we’d have talked if not for this, properly, like

Jake: We usually overlapped instead of colliding 

Sylvie: You were there, so was I

Sylvie: Not together, on the same wavelength

Jake: You wouldn’t have wanted to talk to me, all the ideas you had about who I was, before

Sylvie: True

Sylvie: I had no strong urge to get to know you further

Jake: But we might’ve, at the right party or whatever, I’m found talking people’s ears off most of the time

Sylvie: Never say never, it isn’t like I make a habit of making enemies or wanting to hate people

Sylvie: There are just some people I have less time for… which only seems to be becoming more real but you’re not one of them

Jake: I understand wanting to meet me in dark corner and give me all of your attention

Sylvie: I can think of worse forms of torture

Sylvie: have I ever told you you’re very egotistical, by the way?

Jake: You have, actually

Sylvie: Have I told you I kind of like it?

Jake: Not until now

Sylvie: I really like it

Sylvie: It’s one of the many things about you that makes me want to earn your undivided attention, in the light or dark

Jake: There are too many things I really like about you, I’d need your attention all day and all night to tell you what they are

Sylvie: You have it, you know you do

Sylvie: We don’t have to be alone in Paris to prove that but I can’t wait until we are

Jake: When we wake up there tomorrow it’s the start of our new life

Sylvie: I’ll get [something vegan from the boulangerie which is probably a baguette with jam honestly idk, I doubt the bread is vegan even but as close as you’re getting Jake] for you every morning

Jake: [add coffee to that, picking the most artsy place ever obvs]

Sylvie: You don’t get out of bed for less, yeah

Jake: You know I really only get out of bed for [the herbal tea she was gonna make him that time]

Sylvie: The French will mock you mercilessly for anything less than a black coffee and a cigarette, I’m afraid

Jake: We’ll have to stay in bed for breakfast, I can’t change everything about myself at once

Sylvie: I wouldn’t like it if you did

Sylvie: breakfast in bed with you though, that I can get behind

Jake: [talk about places to stay, because of course you have only now started to think about it and even then only in a fantasy way not like what can we realistically afford]

Sylvie: The other people in the hostel might object to our breakfast in bed sessions, yeah

Jake: We’ll keep moving, there’s loads to see

Sylvie: I don’t care where we are, a cliche for a reason

Sylvie: I’ll have to work out how to make it sound cooler though

Jake: It’s still Paris and I’m still with you

Sylvie: That’s more than a start

Jake: [give her a new ETA]

Sylvie: I should make you run, honestly

Jake: I’ll run, you did it for me

Sylvie: [taking an appropriate/ambitious amount of time off his ETA like go go go babe]

Jake: [do run because you’re excited af obviously and then tell her how long it took you to get to this random meeting spot, I love that y’all have still gotta get all the way to the airport but you’re acting like you’ve made it]

Sylvie: I’m impressed, boy

Sylvie: and I’ll only keep you waiting until you can’t bear it any longer

Jake: I already can’t

Sylvie: You won’t have to miss me ever again in Paris 

Sylvie: don’t you want to savour the last time?

Jake: I should, but I just want you to run too

Sylvie: That’s how I felt, about jumping in this with you, I couldn’t slow down at any point

Jake: We don’t have time to waste, there’s no point taking this slow

Sylvie: I don’t want to, I want you whilst we’re here, not half, all of you

Jake: Life’s for living, and I’m going to, with you

Sylvie: [show him that you are running via a heart rate monitor vibe on your phone]

Jake: Good girl

Sylvie: You are so horribly distracting

Jake: I was trying to motivate you, didn’t it work?

Sylvie: That depends what exactly you were trying to achieve 

Jake: You getting here faster, what else?

Sylvie: That’d be telling

Jake: Showing me your heart rate again would tell me everything, yeah

Sylvie: [do, duh]

Jake: [talk about the song you’re gonna write to the speed and rhythm of it, idk enough about all that shizz but you know what I mean]

[spookyrobbins]

mistakes do happen but callie cheating with mark would be a huge deal. like all of arizona’s fears would become a reality. i don’t see any situation in which she doesn’t leave. but i could totally see everyone like separating themselves from callie and mark a little. like derek and cristina cannot believe what callie did and derek is pissed cause mark did it again. and bailey being so disappointed and just shaking her head every time she’s around callie. alex would be so pissed cause arizona is just beaten down at this point.

the sad thing is that arizona wouldn’t have done what callie did after she found out about lauren. she would’ve been quiet about it and probably even made excuses for her. like she’s been a bad wife/girlfriend and she can’t blame callie, but she can’t stay. she would think she deserved it and idk how in the hell they could ever come back from that. the damage callie would do to arizona would be huge. would she have any remorse for doing it? like would she expect arizona to stick around and get over it?

i would love to write callie cheating with mark for all of the external reactions tbh. i think there would be much more discussion about it than arizona's cheating bc it's two people they know, and two people they all know well, not arizona, who is mainly callie's gf/wife, and some rando. (and yes, yes, we all recognize that they wouldn't cheat, they shouldn't cheat, this is just for fun and chaos)

let's just run through them for funsies

cristina: cristina almost thinks it's a joke at first because there's no way, right? but then when it's confirmed, cristina giving both callie and mark the cold shoulder. like imagine one of them paging cardio and getting cristina and she barely says a word to them, only what's necessary for the patient. especially if it's after the plane crash, when she and arizona are totally trauma bonded

derek: he'd be so pissed at mark, like you said. like how can mark do this again and again and is he so damaged that he thinks this is okay? mark would totally try to justify things and derek would just stop talking to him

bailey: again, i think you nailed it. lots of "i'm not mad i'm just disappointed"; i don't think she'd give callie the same speech she gave george - ie you cheated but you're not a bad person maybe your wife just isn't great? - instead, just lots of shaking her head and telling mark to stop messing around in other people's marriages

alex: alex would offer to fight mark. like alex finding arizona right after she's been crying in her office or something, and saying "i could punch sloan's lights out if you want. i don't hit women though, i draw the line there"

owen: owen would probably ofc take the cheaters' side bc he's allergic to good takes

addison: addison hears about it through the very impressive rumor mill and calls callie to ask if it's just a bad case of telephone. and then totally telling her off for repeating her mistakes.

carlos: carlos would basically give callie the same info he did in canon and callie would probably have a rough time realizing she's making the same mistakes as her parents. he'd also probably try and throw mark through a window

teddy: teddy hears about it like three months after and calls arizona and asks why she didn't tell her bc she would've come and visited or something. and arizona with some line about how she didn't want to bother teddy.

again this is just for fun, let's not read too much into anything

[isaacathom]

i had an (unintentional) week off from my ttrpgs, so i havent been like. deep in the space of my ocs. but i am doing my little red string connections between them and going man. i love the variety of their moral vibes and how "good" they are.

like, naielle wants to be a good person, and do good. And she's so intent on that goal, and so sure of what being good means (even if she couldnt define it for you) that she's extremely critical of whether her actions measure up. In her measure, she doesn't, because she focuses on her failures. And like, yeah. She has a streak of being almost maliciously petty re: what she perceives as a significant betrayal, and her circumstances make her have to sort of "stoop" to the level of the fuckers she deals with. but she cannot recognise her kindness and the care she shows for the people around her. Like... she's friends with the most other pcs, and I know that she's one of the people that the Commodore trusts a LOT, and that she has earned it. she doesn't! she won't! she's great!

There's nothing interesting to say about Zimri, except that they're basically like... a lot more blase about ends justifying means. despite that, they've probably done Less Fucked Up Stuff than naielle has??? which is very funny. Zimri's not consumed with a desire to be good, only to do right - solving problems they have the power or obligation to deal with (ie one they created). So the whole business with ~the fucker~ is an obligation, with some side objectives, and it might be Good, but. yknow. im fixing something. good arises from a solver problem.

Florian is where the contrast is fun. Because Florian thinks he's a bad person. He's been painted as something like a brute his whole life, his primary skill is simply Hitting Shit Hard, he's not the kind of son his family would want, whatever. He's not worth it. He's good at his one thing, and maybe he can do good using that skillset, but he's just trying to survive. And he's wrong!!! He's a good person! He's fiercely protective of his friends and of people he views as innocent (especially children). He presents himself as motivated by practical concerns, but he regularly intervenes for other reasons. Like, he fucking volunteered the group to fight two fucking cyclopses, because they'd been terrorising a town. my guy.

the sort of vibe of the contrast between him and naielle, particularly, is that the one most concerned with doing good is the one struggling most with it, both because she simply has access to Too Much Fucked Shit, and because she really can never live up to her idea of what a good person is. Her journey is doomed to fail in that way, because it won't ever be enough. And Florian, who outwardly claims to not give a fuck, and certainly has no qualms with getting his hands dirty and fucking up people, has such a strong moral centre that he's basically immune to giving a shit about it, and is doing GREAT. if he fucking. reflected on himself for a second, instead of offhandedly rejecting any compliment or statement about his leadership made by the party, he'd KNOW that. but he told himself he wouldn't care YEARS ago. and that's been surprisingly liberating for him.

Similar to Zimri, I guess? When an overly critical concern over 'goodness' is ignored in favour of Getting Shit Done, it lets him. yknow. actually do more good? i guess? as a character. i am not making blanket statements about morality.

its just a funny comparison! naielle cares so much and she'll never win, and that traps her in disappointment. florian cares so much and knows he'll never win, and that enables him to just do his best.

its so good. i love these dipshits