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#even if no one will look at it or if someone thinks its annoying
hannieehaee · 2 days
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how do you think svt would react to their idol s/o performing a sensual dance with another idol?
their idol!s/o performing a sensual dance with another idol
content: implied established relationship, idol!reader, gn reader, slightly suggestive but not really, etc.
wc: 675
a/n: thank u for requesting<3
masterlist
seungcheol -
one of the only members i see feeling a bit of actual jealousy at seeing you dance sensually with someone else. would be super supportive and in love with the sight of you dancing so provocatively, but would have to completely ignore your partner to feel at peace lmao.
jeonghan -
plays up the role of jealous boyfriend just for the fun of it, attempting to rile you up a bit as a bit. he wouldn't actually be jealous, mostly just enjoying the sight of you dancing so sensually, aware that the sight may be for all, but you were his adorable s/o in any other scenario.
joshua -
acts scandalized by it just to make you whine at him to shut up. keeps up the act all throughout just to annoy you, but is super supportive and not shy in expressing both his pride and attraction for you. will for sure practice the dance with you to help you perfect it.
jun -
he literally would have no grounds to complain as an actor who just had a bunch of steamy scenes lmao. he wouldnt feel jealous either way, being supportive of you as you were of him and wanting nothing more than to show you how proud he was.
soonyoung -
that should be him!!! pushing the sensual aspect of the dance aside, he'd just be jealous that you're dancing with someone else in general. he'd wanna be your one and only dance partner for life, so he'd pout at you at times, insisting you at least rehearse with him (as he had learned the entire choreo without you even asking him too lol).
wonwoo -
very nonchalant about it lol. doesnt mind that you're doing a sensual dance. would probably just tease you about it, claiming it was scandalous and playing it up for you just for giggles. would be super supportive otherwise and show up at every rehearsal.
jihoon -
maybe a little flustered at the sight, with a fleeting thought about what it'd be like if it were him you were dancing with. maybe a teeny bit jealous but he'd hide it in order to fully support you. he's danced with girls before, so it's not like he can complain.
seokmin -
that's his s/o!!!! they look so beautiful and sexy and gorgeous and fuck, even though he'd love to be up there with you instead, he'd just be beaming with pride and maybe some cockiness at knowing that's his s/o and even though everyone may want them, only he can have them.
mingyu -
huffs and puffs about it a bit, but mostly in jest. loves to banter with you and bug you any time you do something like this, so he'd just take this as an opportunity for some silly back and forth about how he should be your only dance partner. fully supportive and proud of you otherwise.
minghao -
dancing is an art and its an art he's in love with. seeing you dance in such a way would fire him up inside due to how beautiful and professional you looked, but he would not feel envy for your partner. he'd wanna try and learn the dance with you, though.
seungkwan -
a little riled up by it but he loves and trusts you too much to actually feel threatened by it. will mostly just feel a little cocky at knowing you were all his and that he could have repeats of his performance in private whenever he wanted.
vernon -
i cant see him caring too much about it. probably finds it hot since its u who's dancing, but wont actually feel any jealousy. will help you practice by learning the choreo himself if u ask.
chan -
his passion for dancing would take over and ignore any jealousy he'd feel in any other circumstance. if you were the romantic interest in a drama or something, maybe he'd feel jealous, but in this case he'd just wanna learn the choreo to practice with you and share that love of dance you both have.
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oh my GOD the weirdest thing just happened to me and I NEED ur advice.
So basically, I have this friendship group of like eleven annoying idiots (love ‘em all), and me.
Two of them and me r in the marauders fandom. We’re all 16 btw, just finished GCSEs!!!!!!!!! This is THE summer!!!!!
Anyways, we have ONE couple in our friendship group (that gives rosekiller vibes ngl) and a few others are dating people but not from inside the group (not much group-cest).
So like yesterday, we were all hanging out at one of our houses and I turn to my best mate in the group (who’s also a marauder girlie) and say “isn’t it so weird that our friendship group doesn’t have a wolfstar ship.” cause like ngl, we do give marauder era friendship vibes.
AND EVERYONES GOES SILENT???????? Like people were halfway thru words and they SHUT up. They always ignore us when we talk abt the marauders.  
So I turn to everyone and go “what’s with the silence, half of u don’t even know what wolfstar is.”
And one of them goes “we might not know shit about harry potter but someone’s definitely mentioned wolfstar a few times”. 
AND SHE LOOKS AT ONE OF OUR FRIENDS.
I assume I shouldn’t use her real name her so imma just call her Clara (she loves TS Clara Bow song so-).
Clara blushes REAL red and looks down and whispers for the person who said that to shut up.
So I say “Hang on, I thought we weren’t allowed to blab abt the marauders after *my best mate* and *another person in the group* argued over who hated JKR the most? For three hours.”
And the girl from before who apparently knows what wolfstar is says “Yeah- except when we’re watching wolfstar happen, of course we have to know what it is.”
HUH,
So I furrow my eyes brows at her and she goes “you know” which I DONT.
And then my best mate rolls her eyes and says “we do have a wolfstar in this friendship group dumbass.” 
LIKE WHO OKAY? 
Anyway, we sorta moved on. And when I tried to hound my best mate later that night she wouldn’t tell me shit. She just kept saying “no. you know all the ships in our friendship group. we aren’t keeping the wolfstar one from you.”
ANYWAY I went home and THEN it occurred to me that… ME. I could be in the wolfstar ship our friends were talking abt. Otherwise I would KNOW, since I always know.
And there’s only one person they all ship me with in our group, Clara. 
SO I TEXT MY BEST MATE LIKE, WAHT RHE FUCK GIRL YOUVE BEEN SHIPING ME WITH SOMEONE SECRETLY
and she says, she hasn’t been shipping us secretly she’s been shipping us to my face
and so I say, that it wasn’t serious until she compared me to my FAV marauders couple
and so she says, WELL IM GLAD U NOW FEEL ITS SERIOUS 
and so I say, how dare u compare me to remus, I love him but he’s def not me. 
and she says, IM NOT BITCH YOURE SIRIUS
so I say, SIRIUS? 
and she says, SIRIUS!
And I say, girl how? 
And she says, how about the fact that ur family are psychos and u really need to move out. How abt because ur an idiot who can’t see what’s right in front of her? How about your a demi bi queer chaotic mess who can’t recognise what could be the love of your life if she literally kissed you on the cheek which she FUCKING DID
so I say, … that was platonic? 
And she says, I hate you (jk I love u) but no rlly I hate u so much. WHAT RHE FUCK DUDE. 
So I say, wait, u don’t think she has a crush on me do u? 
and she says, I FUCKING HATE U HOW R U THIS DUMB.
(this is all taking place over text in case I hadn’t made that clear).
So i say, JUST CAUSE SHES GAY DOESNT MEAN SHE FANCIES ME.
And she says, NO BUT KISSING UR CHEEK AND ASKING U OUT ON SINGLE DATES AND BEINF SAD WHEN U GET A BF AND SPENDING ALL HER TIME WITH TOU DOES MEAN SHE FANCIES U DUMBASS.
So I say, has she told you? 
And she says, u know I can’t say either way.
So I say, so no. She doesn’t. 
AND RHEN I STOP REPLYING.
But now I think she might. 
Which is awkward. Look i’m not like- straight or anything, but I never get crushes, who has the time to care honestly. 
And I don’t wanna be like, oh my friend who’s a lesbian ObViOuSlY has a crush on ME. I’m not like, Erin in Derry Girls. UGH. 
But in hindsight, she HAS seemed bothered whenever I talk about boyfriends (which isn’t that often cause again, who has the fucking time). 
And she did NOT like my ex. Which was only sort of fair personality wise.
And like yes, technically, we have hung out solo and then she kissed my cheek. But like, we’re just really good friends.
ALSO how dare my best mate compare me to Sirius. Sure my parents are evil but they’re NOT RICH. I mean if you’re gonna be horrific at least be rich right? 
And here’s the thing, if I bring it up and Clara does like me- WHAT DO I SAY
and if I bring it up and she doesn’t, i’m that bitch who assumes she does cause she’s gay.
AND if I don’t and she does like me, am I just being ignorant so it’s easier for me. 
Or if i don’t and she doesn’t like me, will I think there’s some weird air here and she won’t even know what’s going on. 
I HATE being in the unknown.
And like I had known our friends shipped us but they’ve done it for like… three years maybe? Not religiously but as a jk. 
So by this point it’s just background noise. but now they’ve compared us to WOLFSTAR (and know what wolfstar is it seems) now I’m like thinking about this.
MAYBE THATS THEIR PLAN. Maybe it’s just a trick to mess with us more. 
But now I can’t help worrying that when we hang out it’s supposed to be a date. Or that time she kissed me was supposed to be a date and I DIDNT REALISE and just rudely ignored her. 
WHAT IF IVE BEEN A BITCH THIS WHOLE TIME? 
Also like yes, she was there for the wolfstar comparison, but idk if SHE knows it was US being compared to them.
Clara doesn’t LOVE the marauders fandom, but she’s lovely and always lets me ramble about it (like I let her ramble abt her books). And so she knows a lot of lore, specifically about Wolfstar. 
So idk if she knew it was abt us, or if she’s just like realising now.
Also, and here’s the weird part, I care. 
I never give a shit usually, about whoever has a crush on me or whatever. I just do what I want and deal with other people later. But now it’s my friend, my really lovely and funny and sweet and beautiful and kind friend and I don’t want to hurt her.
BUT MAYBE I WONT. Cause maybe she doesn’t even like me so it’s nothing to worry abt. 
WHO KNOWS ANYMORE.
Anyway, that’s the story. Got any advice for me Cas? ALSO congrats on your new school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh boy.
First of all- babe, it sounds like you're the last to know about all this. But I'm glad you're aware now. Welcome to the party!
Also- "my really lovely and funny and sweet and beautiful and kind friend" uhm. do you wanna say that again? And tell me there's no feelings there?
I mean, I'm not gonna tell you how you feel but it sounds like you need to stop overthinking and just spend some time with Clara. Because it could be that you're overlooking something great, here. Stop getting in your head and just feel for a bit. Wolfstar is a superior ship for a reason :D
Naming you wolfstar anon
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sanghamitragautam · 2 days
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Birthday Bash: Gojo's Hangover Adventure
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Summary: Satoru Gojo, the invincible sorcerer, faces an unexpected challenge on his birthday: loneliness. But when he ropes Nanami Kento into a night of drinking, things take a hilarious turn. From awkward sips to questionable drinks, watch Gojo navigate the perils of birthday surprises and hangovers, all while discovering the true meaning of friendship in the unlikeliest of places.
Rating: T (Teen)
Pairings: No romantic pairings, focused on friendship dynamics.
Themes: Friendship, humor, unexpected moments, vulnerability.
Genres: Comedy, slice of life, friendship.
youtube
Another year older, and still, nobody knew. Satoru Gojo, the strongest jujutsu sorcerer, felt a twinge of loneliness as he walked through the empty halls of Jujutsu High. Birthdays were always odd for him—no one ever remembered, and he never mentioned it. It was easier that way. Easier to keep up the façade of invincibility.
After classes ended, Gojo found himself aimlessly wandering, looking for a distraction. His thoughts drifted to Nanami Kento, his ever-serious colleague. Annoying Nanami always lifted his spirits. With a mischievous grin, Gojo set off to find his target.
He found Nanami heading towards his favorite bar. Perfect.
“Hey, Nanamin! Wait up!” Gojo called out, catching up effortlessly.
Nanami sighed, casting a sidelong glance at Gojo. “Gojo, what do you want?”
“Just thought I’d tag along. It’s a free world, right?” Gojo replied, his grin widening.
Nanami raised an eyebrow. “You don’t drink.”
“Maybe I’m feeling adventurous today.”
Suspicious but not in the mood to argue, Nanami shrugged and continued to the bar, Gojo trailing behind. They found a quiet corner, and Nanami ordered his usual.
Gojo, still bouncing with energy, kept up a stream of chatter, teasing Nanami about his strict work ethic, his serious demeanor, and anything else he could think of. Nanami bore it with his usual stoicism, sipping his drink and occasionally replying with a deadpan remark.
“Alright, alright, let me try a drink,” Gojo said suddenly, his curiosity piqued.
Nanami smirked. This was an opportunity he couldn’t pass up. He ordered the roughest, most unpalatable drink on the menu and slid it over to Gojo. “Enjoy.”
Gojo took a tentative sip, his face immediately scrunching up in disgust. “This is awful! Why do people even drink this stuff?”
Nanami chuckled. “It’s an acquired taste.”
Determined not to be outdone, Gojo continued to sip at the drink, grimacing with each swallow. Before long, he was feeling the effects. His normally sharp eyes grew a little glassy, and his speech slowed.
“Nanamin, you’re such a serious guy,” Gojo slurred, laughing. “Why don’t you ever loosen up?”
Nanami, slightly tipsy himself, found Gojo’s antics surprisingly amusing. “Someone has to keep things in order, especially with you around.”
Their banter continued, growing more relaxed and less guarded as the alcohol worked its way through their systems. For once, Gojo wasn’t the unshakeable, confident sorcerer; he was just a guy spending time with a friend.
After a while, Nanami glanced at Gojo, who was uncharacteristically quiet, staring into his empty glass. “Gojo, is something wrong? You’ve been…different today.”
Gojo laughed, a hollow sound. “Maybe it’s my birthday and people remember, but only for selfish reasons.”
Nanami’s eyes widened briefly. That explained a lot. But he knew better than to make a big deal out of it. “Well, happy birthday, I guess.”
Gojo waved it off. “Yeah, thanks. Don’t make a fuss about it.”
They finished their drinks, and Nanami helped a slightly wobbling Gojo to his feet. On the way home, Nanami made a quick stop to pick up some anti-hangover supplies. He knew Gojo would appreciate it tomorrow.
The next morning, Gojo woke up with a pounding headache. Groaning, he noticed the water, painkillers, and other hangover remedies on his bedside table. A small note read, “Take these. You’ll feel better. –Nanami”
A rare, genuine smile crossed Gojo’s face. For a moment, the loneliness lifted. He wasn’t as invincible as everyone thought, but he had friends who cared in their own way.
“Thanks, Nanamin,” he murmured, feeling a warmth that had nothing to do with his jujutsu abilities.
Feel free to drop a comment if you laughed, cried, or if you just want to yell about how much you love Nanago (because, same).
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One Piece Modern Gym Au wip (Part 5)
They actually stared at each other for almost half an hour before something came to Sanji’s mind.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“I don't know, can you?”
Sanji felt the burning ache to roll his eyes, but that would mean losing the game, so he didn't. Instead, he narrowed his eyes to give Zoro an annoying look.
“There were two girls at the bar earlier…”
“I assure you I don't have their number, and even if I won't give it to you.” Zoro cuts in immediately.
“For fucks sake, can you not jump to that conclusion right away?!” Sanji sighed. “They talked about a girl who used to come here some years ago and then stopped only to come back now.”
This time, Zoro narrowed his eye, but Sanji didn't put much of a thought into it.
“Yeah?”
“So…I never saw a new girl come in these past days, and I wondered who it was.”
“Don't know; ask them if you want to know. I wasn't here for the past three years, too.” Zoro shrugged his shoulders but never looked away.
Sanji licked his lips while thinking about what else the girls had said.
“Oh, one of them talked about that this girl had her breasts removed - chopped off was what she said, but I don't think that's appropriate to say. You never know why she did that, could be a medical condition…Also, it sounded like she wanted to look more buff. At least that what they said and that she should have get steroids instead, because the effect is the same, and…”
Sanji stopped talking as he realized the shift in Zoro’s gaze. Next thing was Zoro turning on his heals and walked out the front door without a word, leaving behind a very confused Sanji. Did he say something wrong? Did Zoro know the girl? What had just happened?
The next day came and went without Zoro showing up…a strange fact considering he practically lived in the Gym after his return - he was the first to come in and the last to go. But no one thought about it too much. After the following day went by without a sign of him, Sanji felt worry nagging its way into his mind. Nami seemed unbothered, and so he ignored it.
After the fifth day without Zoro showing his mosshead in the gym, Sanji had to ask Nami if she knew something about him. Was it normal for Zoro to show up every day for five to six hours, training, casually hanging out, and making his work life some kind of a mix of heaven and hell - and then disappearing from one day to the other? Or maybe it had something to do with the question about that girl…
“Maybe it's my fault…” Sanji said, looking down at his feet.
“How should this be your fault?” Nami wanted to know.
“Remember the evening you and Vivi left us behind because we had this little staring fight?”
Nami nodded, now looking up from her paperwork.
“I asked him about a girl I heard someone talk about.”
And funny enough, Nami had the same reaction as Zoro as she heard that.
“What girl?”
Sanji described the whole conversation he overheard and that he just wanted to know if Zoro knew that girl. Also, he was sure now that he knew her and maybe wanted to avoid her because of reasons he couldn't think of.
“Now it all makes sense,” Nami mumbled and shook her head.
She let Sanji describe both girls and said if he saw them, he should send them to her because she needed to tell them something.
“And what about Zoro?” Sanji asked quietly - to be honest, he was worried to the point he thought about him every day.
“He surely just crashed at Luffy’s house. If you want, I can give you his address, and you can check?”
“Would that be okay? I mean, I’m a stranger. Wouldn't your friend be upset if you handed out his address?”
Nami laughed while scribbling something down on a piece of paper.
“Na, he doesn't mind, believe me. Actually, I think he’ll be quite happy to have a new victim for his rambling. He collects people like others collect post stamps,” she paused and grinned as she saw Sanji’s somehow irritated and scared face. “That sounded creepy…It’s totally not, believe me. He just likes to make friends.”
And so Sanji left after his shift to check out if Zoro was at that Luffy’s place or not.
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theheightofdishonor · 5 months
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I love reading your kagehina posts!! Sometimes I see stuff like they aren't even friends 😭 and probably drifted apart and partner in sports is different from actual friendship lmao
Thank you!
dfghhjkl yeah i've seen those claims and I firmly believe that anyone who's saying any of that needs to take reading comprehension 101. I've talked about this claim a little bit here but to reiterate, kageyama and hinata's bond- their unique connection, the meaningfulness of it, the way that they support and teach and learn from each other- is one of the core aspects of the series. Like, there were so many instances of people commenting about how special their relationship was that I made a list. This post here I think are also relevant to addressing this. (if you couldn't tell, i talk about this a lot lol. But I don't mind talking about it some more)
Point is, they mean a lot to each other. And yes, haikyuu does make a point of showing how volleyball isn't always a 1 v 1 comparison to irl and how volleyball doesn't have to mean everything to be meaningful but at the same time, that's inapplicable to hinata and kageyama because the other side of that coin is that sometimes, volleyball is everything. It could not possibly be more in your face that Kageyama and Hinata formed an instantaneous connection and became a duo to be feared like overnight because they recognized that the other person is exactly like them- someone who will give everything for volleyball, who will never give up, a person who complements them. and understands them. Kageyama's little backstory moment that changed everything (and fucked me up permanently) is that he's been waiting for (someone like) Hinata his entire life. So what if they're not be hanging out 24/7 outside of volleyball? (which they do hang out outside of matches btw later on in life, kageyama asked hinata to play beach vb with kunimi and kindaichi) They already have a mutual understanding about the importance of volleyball in their lives. Also like, even in the last chapter/panel of haikyuu literally just reiterates that for the two of them, volleyball and each other and intrinsically intertwined elements and that they intend on revolving around each other as partner/rivals for the rest of their lives.
If we're looking only at the anime, that list i linked above is entirely taken from season. Like, the the sheer weight of kageyama "i can spike, toss, etc by myself" tobio saying the words "as long as you're with me, you're invincible" like 1-2 episodes later?? This bullshit where kageyama extracts a promise from hinata to follow him to the top of the world still happens in the anime too. That bit in the first Seijoh match where Kageyama says that Oikawa's going to set to Iwaizumi, not because it's the most logical move but because he trusts him so innately that it's the most natural move to make and then going on to make the exact same set to Hinata in the same match?? The extra animated linger on Kageyama and Hinata's fingers touching as they stop the Miya's quick? Oikawa and Atsumu both saying that Kageyama's "wrapped around Hinata's finger"?
Like come on now, does this look like two people who are going to drift apart? Be for real. They're too obsessed with each other to do that.
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cherrysnax · 6 days
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im very silly but sometimes it annoys me when people don’t enjoy something the exact same way I do. and it’s suuuuch a bad trait and I’m working on it 😭
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yuridovewing · 6 days
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i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.
what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.
in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?
obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)
#and this isnt getting into how trans mothwing outside of mothpool is a really good way to read her character#sorry. remembered the shit bonefall got despite being trans as well and got annoyed#that especially annoys me bc hes got plenty of surrogacies but the second hed touch a trans pregnancy#‘’no you cant do that!!! you freak!!! obviously you only see trans people as a loophole for gays to have babies!!!’’#also my gf and i were talking and obviously take this with a grain of salt bc this is our experience#but…. i think a lot of the ppl saying this……. havent really talked to trans women?#dude some of the ones i know LOVE the idea of getting people pregnant#did you know trans women have sex? did you know trans people in general have sex?? did you know trans people irl wanna start families?#did you know that? did you? or do you black out at the idea of a trans woman being anything but strictly pure and nonsexual#and OBVIOUSLY this is not every trans woman. some do have dysphoria around the idea#but im genuinely starting to wonder how these people act around irl transgender parents#whether they had kids before or after coming out#bc ngl. the attitude that thinking about this makes you a transphobic pervert?#directed at trans people making content for themselves?#im starting to think you all just dont want us to reproduce. if we reproduce we arent ‘’good’’ trans people#because a ‘’real’’ man wouldnt carry a child. a ‘’real’’ woman would carry the child. and god forbid the gays even THINK about reproducing#and being around children!#if we have children then we’re doing things that might make cishets look at us and declare we’re not perfect#we’ve proved we’re not just identical to cis ppl!! (and therefore deserving of respect!)#idk. i think this was mostly a case of tumblr going ‘’oh someone said no to this so lets push this to an unhealthy extreme!!’’#and i cant help but notice nobody really brings up nonbinary parents at all in this discussion#not that we have it ‘’better’’ or anything for that but yknow. are we supposed to swear it off?#is the idea of us having kids inconcievable? or worse…. does it mean we ‘’picked a side?’’#so its not even worth getting mad at a pregnant nb person bc ‘’well thats a woman so who cares’’b#HMMMMM.#ohhhh i bet they also get mad if you make transfem pregnancy possible too. no winning#idk really think about it when you go ‘’you can NEVER EVER portray a trans person starting a family. bc REAL trans people would never.’’#ohhh you probably get mad when trans ppl dont get surgery for one reason or another dontcha#whether we want to or its not in the cards for us for whatever reason like cost and such#(while also getting mad if we do bc we cannot win in this no matter what)
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vse-kar-vem · 3 months
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how to write vent post title that does not come off as self-pitying and or accusatory (because it's NOT !)
#sorry tumblr is like a diary to me idk what i'll do w this blog after i (sigh) inevitably move on#either way#im convinced everyone hates me again :3 but realistically no one cares about me even enough to hate me im just stupid and self centred 💔#if anything me TYPING these posts is actuvely turning people against me#again with the assumptions that people care enough to read these 😭 fhskfbhsjfkg#i hate that i care so much what people online think of me cuz irl it's like. whatever#but here there are so many cool people who i admire and would love to be friends with im always hyperparanoid of everything i do#and still i manage to overstep and come off as annoying#like obvs you're allowed to hate me even if you're someone i look up to like that's your perogative#but i hate worrying about IF anyone hates me#oughgh this is easier irl because usually people send off pretty clear signals if they dont like you#but online (esp with how prickly this fandom is) i don't know whether im being insecure and reading into things or whether people just don't#like me (which again is fine i would just rather know if anyone gets it)#i figure art is the one way i can get people to like me 💔 which sounds kinda pathetic because irl i KNOW im liked and capable!#fandom has just become such a big part of my personality that i cant detach my self worth from it#and i do love art and drawing and such i hate that even if i know people my stuff EYE dont and it doesnt mean anything or act as a signifier#of my friendships#wow .... i really am my own therapist ..... i should shut up#the industrial revolution and its consequences (jofandom)#i think these posts are half self exploration half ... almost self harm? because sometimes im so derogatory about myself on purpose in a#'you're worthless' way. but at the same time it's cathartic and i always feel better having probed at my feelings and gotten them in order#not to do a complete 180 but it's MY post and JO LONDON IN *12* DAYS!!!!!!!! AHH i'm sooo excited if it doesnt live up to my expectations i#may cry a little. and there will be another vent post from me !#sometimes i wonder if anyone actually reads these 😭#vee rambles
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skitskatdacat63 · 4 months
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I will read the most inane and useless stuff for hours just for my own interest/enjoyment, but reading academic papers is like pulling a tooth 😭😭 like I genuinely think I'd find the info interesting but the fact that ik it's in pursuit of doing an assignment somehow manages to kills my motivation 100%
#step 1. you pick a research topic you find genuinely interesting#step 2. you have to research and read papers abour this topic. hey dont you remember you find this interesting??#i just remember going on deep dives learning about random historical figures#but absolutely god forbid i read anything in the pursuit of actual schoolwork#i think its mostly that i feel constantly under duresss when im reading it yknow?#all i can think is: im going to have to write something about this#lol just need someone i can blab to about politics and maybe it would actually work out for me#but ugh yeah theres just such a palpable difference btwn reading smth for enjoyment and reading something 'for work'#here is an example!#in my one class i think my prof put The Prince as a reading#i didnt even look cause im liek yeah i aint reading all of that#fast forward a year later: oh my god! i wanna read machiavelli so bad! i wanna feel intellectual 🥰🥰#literally bought myself a copy of it .....#i think im too self aware. id like to remove all sense of context from my brain#literally spent hours today watching documentaries that are actually pretty relevant to my one course#<- but note. they werent FOR my course. i was just doing ir for fun! i wanted to learn!!#but if i got assigned a hour and a half docu for class....that shit would not be getting done#ugh yeah anyways i have two research papers this sem#and its so fucking annoying bcs its so open to my choices. like here. you can pick smth you find genuinely interesting#and you guys literally witness me constantly learn info and want to apply it#but the thought of having to write a paper for school(god forbid) literally keeps me awake at night#its just yeah. wish i could remove that particular barrier from my brain#bcs some of the things i do for fandom are literally borderline research papers#like. read and research a bunch. write about it to other people. apply the info(in fic/drawing/meta)#and really the topics are not so different from my actual coursework#but when i contemplate having to research and write for school it just flatlines my brain#need to start forcing people to watch me borderline seminar so that it feels more fun and in-line w what i do on here#the fernando card post???? practically a research paper. god. my brain is so bad#catie.rambling.txt
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reignbowarbiter · 11 months
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take pen15 off of tiktok rn bc ppl dont get it
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monachopism · 27 days
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am i autistic or am i just paranoid. level: impossible
#seeing a friend of mine for the first time in 2 years but it was at a 9hr work training and i barely talked to him the whole time#so i text our gc multiple times bc im excited#but everyones drained from the day#so am i being a good loving kind person or am i being annoying as hell#my brain says the first one and my gut says the second#i also might have a big fat crush on this man (he is unfairly attractive and kind and funny and TALL)#so i may be overreacting bc of that#i just missed him and now my big fat crush on him is bigger and fatter than ever#at the end of our first summer he hugged me tight and told me he loved me (platonically)#then he asked if i was coming back and i said yes without any hesitation#and then he didnt come back#so ive been going on 2 years of stewing in this fucking crush soup and now im just#tumblr is the only place where i can talk abt this no one important in my life can know this#no one#i just really like him#and i wanna be around him all the time#and i wanna sit with him and talk to him and laugh with him#and help him with stuff#and i have not had an actual crush on someone since my sophomore and junior year of high school#which was 4 and 5 years ago at this point#this guy also kept staring at me from across the room and everytime i would glace in his direction he would look away#and every time i would get a glimpse of him at training i could physically feel the butterflies#hell#every time i even thought about the fact that we were in the same general area i would get butterflies#this never happens to me and its such a weird feeling#would you be so kind by dodie is the anthem of the hour rn#and i know there's a huge part of me that thinks i am unlovable bc of how i look#and ive never had anyone love me or even like me enough to initiate any kind of anything#ive been on one date in my life#never been kissed never had sex
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sydmarch · 2 months
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might have a mutual breakup with my therapist tomorrow sigh
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p2iimon · 2 months
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drawing more furry fnaf art. yknow just to keep you posted. i love posting in the tags sorry these ones got away from me
#sammy is a brown bear (like freddy). his mom is white like funtime freddy#then crying child is blue (like bon bon. and to go with lizzies bonnet pink) (theyre not twins in my au but they definitely act like it. so#its like cute.) mrs. afton is blue violet (rockstar bonnie) bc i was running out of colors. i had already assigned her blue anyway.#max is black bc i seriously ran out of rabbit colors. or! no wait shadow bonnie. thats totally the inspo and not i had made his ears black#already. i think thats literally every rabbit color available. the afton family is pretty big. ig vanny. who would go with vanessa. obvi bu#shes not in my au. or at least not an afton. and therefore not a rabbit. if she was though shed be white.#and if you havent seen any previously drawn ones henry and william are yellow (obviously. they already have fursonas. theyre the reason#everyone else gets one. LOL) micheals purple like classic bonnie (who... is purple even if it was then retconned. hes purple. look at#withered bonnie. i hate ppl who say its just lighting. thats a lie by big blue bonnie. he was literally purple and then he changed his mind#like i said lizzie is pink like bonnet. and then charlie is black like lefty. because duhh.#DONT ask me about how this shit works okay. the rabbit dated the rabbit and the bear dated the bear. bc thats what happened. theres not#here. the bears got divorced. and the rabbits. the yellow rabbit and bear are fucking#no um. i like willry but i think if they were really fucking. i just think things would go differently. henry's gay in my au i dont think i#he actually had a man to fuck he'd manage to have children. its not who he is to me. will is bi but he obv thinks henry is some exception t#him being perfectly normal and straight. everyone wants to fuck their business partner. otherwise youd do it yourself#ig they can fuck after. i hate when people do these boring aus where henry and william never get married and william isnt a murderer and so#like what? theres nothing? just a couple of guys? if im looking for fics where theyre fucking im not looking for a fic where everything is#nice and clean. be serious. can we at least have some angst about it being the 70s or are you too much of a bitch for that too#anyway.....#simons spouting#simons fnaf au#OH also if anyone reads this whats the stance on this stupid idea i have where sammy pretends he has a thing for michael to annoy max. bc.#their parents had a thing for eachother. and sammy and max have a more familial relationship. and michael and charlie have a familial#relationship. but michael and sammy have barely met and do not at all. is it pushing it? i was thinking yknow from sammys perspective that'#'his sons' dad but! like you can fuck your sons dad. that's not weird. unless thats the way youre phrasing it i guess LOL. but i guess#michael would be like. thats 'my sisters' brother. and that is not someone you fuck*. BUT this isnt michaels perspective its sammy being#annoying. and from sammys perspective that is NOT his sister and there for NOT his sisters brother. *also im pretty sure this is subjective#if youre just friends. yknow. the ethics of sammy using this to bother max is not on the table because i think he deserves to be a#a bit of an ass. anyway LMAOO fkdglfg. let me know if youd like ive got anon asks on. please dont judge me for not knowing this.
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sonknuxadow · 1 year
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new rule: people who arent sonic fans have to learn the basics of sonic lore and the characters relationships with eachother before they are allowed to say anything about sonic characters. especially if it is about sonic and tails
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udurghsigil · 1 year
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can't stress enough that you guys don't have to answer every single ask you get. in fact you can just delete them. especially if they are causing you psychic damage.
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gifti3 · 4 months
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Im cursing [REDACTED] right NOW
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#god i better never have contact with this guy again or i might flip out on him#im about to ramble about my past “dating" adventures (we were casual but sheesh cant even be friends with this guy tbh)#im realizing months later how much this guy i used to talk to sucked#like DUDE be a better or stay single FOREVER (ΘдΘ)#and by that i mean learn how to better handle approaching others feelings!#god the way he would just shutdown others ppls feelings and it was just an endless loop of “that doesnt make sense” or “thats dumb”#sure emotions can be irrational but if someone is desperately TRYING to explain why they feel a way (even if theyre struggling to be clear)#maybe dont be so dismissive#like literally one time i was annoyed cause talking to him was grating on my nerves#and i was like ik it doesnt make sense so let me step away cause im annoyed#and hes like trying to logic me out of my annoyance???#like worstie im literally walking away so i can cool off#leave it be!#god looking back on all this....#i hope to god whoever hes talking to (if hes talking to anyone) isnt dealing with similar things#ppl can change so ill just hope for that#or maybe he'll meet his match#someone who reflects the same energy he has!#tho im not sure if hed like that haha#the guy seemed to have a lot of relationship problems in general (romantic and platonic) and i wanted to have the benefit of the doubt#but now im thinking maybe his personality was also just clashing with everyone elses#which isnt necessarily a bad thing on its own#gotta get context for everything u know#but in this case....naur#like im a pretty anxious person so how ppl i care about will react to what im doing or saying is constantly at the back of my mind!#so ppl who just come off as flippant about my fee fees annoy me fr#im like “ahh what if i upset so and so” constantly#trying to make sure not to make things harder for them#and they cant even spare me a single thought before doing something and dismiss me when i get upset#but also they wanna come to me when theyre feeling sad about something???
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