#and I see is reader insert fanfic and it’s like do y’all even actuality like what we’re consuming or are you people just lonely

[cherrysnax]

im very silly but sometimes it annoys me when people don’t enjoy something the exact same way I do. and it’s suuuuch a bad trait and I’m working on it 😭

[konigsblog]

I’d like to direct those sending hate to people simply writing dark content to holding adult video sites accountable if they want to achieve some kind of moral victory.

There have been multiple instances of sites like 🌽 hub taking genuine footage of rape/SA and refusing to remove it even when requested multiple times by the victim. Some of their heavier ‘consensual’ bondage vids etc have been said to involve deliberately pushing expressed boundaries by female actors that have do things they didn’t originally agree to for fear of loosing their job. These are real people- their experiences are REAL and have a lasting physical, social and mental effect.

Ghost, König etc are not real. Y/n, is a reader insert of course, but you are never in genuine danger. Everything you ‘put yourself’ into in these fics, can stop at the press of a button. You can hate it, hate the author and never interact with them again- problem solved (If only y’all would do that). In real life? A SA/rape survivor has lived through it, suffers from it forever and might have the disgusting burden of having to see their assaulter in the flesh at work, home etc.

To insinuate that a piece of fanfic that can be ignored, that you CHOOSE to engage with is as equally abhorrent as the real act is disgusting. It’s downright offensive. It’s a great discredit to us victims and shows you don’t actually give a damn about us at all.

You’ll be silent when it’s time to hold a harmful industry accountable/silent in the face a thousand men saying that 🌽 actresses ‘deserve it’ but will continually send hate to what is a largely femme community for typing words on a screen that you could avoid so easily. Yeah, I know why, there’s a word for it starting with M :)

On that note, most of these people are dead silent on other fandom issues which proves it’s vendetta, not justice based. They don’t actually care about making it a ‘safe place’ (which is impossible, that’s no one else’s responsibility but your own). Not a peep about racism, for example- can’t be assed making fandom more accessible and less exclusive to POC, gotta go out of their way to harass authors though!

You don’t have to like dark content, or even the authors. You can have limits, disdain bad tagging practices, question respectfully why someone might want to read/write such content, but don’t you dare use victims as a scapegoat or insinuate that you are in any way justified if you choose to harass or bully. Do better; focus your energy somewhere actually productive and deserving of criticism, or shut up and move on.

I agree with absolutely everything you said. These are the same people that consume pornography via porn sites, then sit and complain about people having rape fantasies and consuming dark fiction (key word: fiction). They care more about people's kinks and fantasies and decisions in the bedroom (where both parties have consented beforehand), then they do about the REAL rape tapes on porn sites. It's not just rape either, there's a lot of incredibly fucked-up, illegal, and sickening things on these sites that I won't get into. People have their trauma published, profited off of, and are violated for money, and these sites never take these videos down either.

They care too much about their comfort character being portrayed in a way they don't agree with to focus on the poor souls who have had their trauma uploaded online – and to make money off! Are the COD characters real, or am I missing something? They're fictional characters. Just because you don't agree with a headcannon doesn't mean that everyone else also disagrees. It doesn't determine their morality. And honestly, do I really think these hateful and spiteful people are victims of some form of assault? No, I don't. Because victims of SA/rape (who cope differently) filter things out to prevent themselves from getting triggered. I don't think that these hate anons are actually triggered by the content I upload and just want to judge others for coping differently. They just want to seem more moral – as if your mortality depends on your coping mechanisms/fantasies are. If you don't want to watch a video, you wouldn't choose to watch it anyways. You wouldn't force yourself to watch the entire thing, then come to the comment section and cry about how you're not interested in the topics featured in the video. You watching that video was a decision you made, a choice. You wouldn't take a kid to a horror film that's clearly 18+, then scream at the film directors for creating it in the first place. If you're not the intended audience, then don't stay. There is an audience of people who do enjoy dark fiction, and just because you don't, doesn't mean that it can't exist. The world doesn't only revolve around you. It's selfish and small-minded.

You get taught about fiction and non-fiction in Primary school, and yet here we are, have to tell adults (or at least people who claim they're 18+) the difference between the two. If you can't draw a line between fantasy and reality, then you shouldn't have access to the internet. That's irresponsibility. It's people wanting to be saviours, act as if they have the moral high ground because they disagree and think that it makes them a better person, when it doesn't. If anything, them constantly harassing innocent writers is worse than what they try to portray us dark content writers as. These are the same people wishing rape, death, and doxxing towards writers who have done nothing but be respectful and give out warnings before a story. Dark fiction writers have more empathy and sympathy than these puritans who think they're on top of the world for coping differently, because we actually understand that there are different mechanisms to cope after being sexually assaulted.

I will never apologise for writing what I write. I refuse to walk on eggshells around these anons simply because they can't act mature and manage their own triggers. These people won't bother reading the articles that I've linked countless times, or listen to this entire post. Because they're narrow-minded, that's what narrow-minded folk do. They don't hear other opinions or think for a second, that maybe, just maybe, they're being disrespectful. They claim we're romanticising rape by writing it, but don't bother learning what romanticising actually is. I've said countless times that rape is a disgusting, violating crime that deserves years of punishment. I don't describe what these characters do as IDEAL or something to WANT, if anything, I describe them as horrible people because that's how I see them. They're in the military for God's sake...

When they send hate to an author's askbox, do they think for a second about the effect it'll have? Victims go through years of self hatred and disgust after being traumatised, and when they find a coping mechanism, do you think they want to be told that they deserve to be raped again, or that they're disgusting, or that they're supporting the vile crime? Of course they don't, because they don't support victims at all.

These people are too illiterate to read this entire post. If anything, it'll go right through them. In one ear and out the other. Am I also responsible for the media they consume? As in, horror films? Will I hold their hand and cradle them, rock them to sleep because they don't want to take responsibility? That's life. You have responsibilities. You can't just drop them because you feel like it and then put it on a writer's shoulders because YOU weren't thinking.

And sure, I can see how dark fiction can possibly affect reality. But, that's not my responsibility. If someone is has the urge to rape someone, that's an issue on their behalf, caused by mental illness. I can't control what people do, just like how film directors can't control the effect that their work will have. If people get themselves off to my content, that's not my responsibility. Writers and film directors aren't responsible for the effect it'll have on others, because there are a plethora of factors that can change a reaction towards certain content, like mental illness, for example. Mental illness plays a huge factor.

[kamiversee]

I wish y’all would just chill on this app bro. I’m actually getting irritated by people who seriously lack something as simple as basic comprehension skills.

Many things to say to this, bear with me. 🧚

For one, due to the fact that you so clearly did not read anything I said in my previous reply, I’m going to insert it here again!!

You said “If there are similarities between gojo and zade then that's your problem, I'm just pointing it out but you're the one who wrote it did you not?” but if that’s the case then I am entirely entitled to tell you that I don’t like that comparison, nor do I want to hear or see anything regarding it. I wrote it, it’s my story — I’m allowed to not like certain comparisons!! 🥰

Following that, never once did I say I had a problem with my fic being compared to dark romance as it’s literally a dark romance fanfiction in itself. The issue here lies in the book you specifically compared it to. Duh??

Which is part of why I said you must be new around here because most of my readers are aware of the fact that I don’t like the Zade/Gojo comparison because while they may have one or maybe two things in common, they really aren’t alike in the slightest. Especially when you dive even deeper into the story.

Thank you for this headache tho because you just reminded me to let future readers know that I don’t like comparisons. Let tfl be what it is please. You can compare it to whatever you want with whoever, obviously I can’t control that but just don’t come to me personally with that shit because it’s not a compliment & I don’t find it funny nor entertaining in the slightest!!

&& the topics specifically romanticized in TFL are included here in the warnings:

You also said that I “went out of my way” to create another book just so that they got together… Girl, that was REQUESTED by MANY of the people who read the damn story and still wanted Gojo even after all he did & or, to have all their unanswered questions answered. I was originally not going to drop a sequel & answer things one by one but the number of people asking for more led me to do so.

Haunting Adeline romanticizes some of the topics I included in tfl PLUS MORE that I, again, specifically do not romanticize, sexualize, or write.

The damn book was never supposed to be considered “regular erotica” since it literally starts off with Gojo fucking blackmailing her. It starts out dark and ends even darker, please.

I’m also VERY well aware that dark romance doesn’t always mean sa or 🍇. tfl is a dark romance fanfic. I know this.

And last but certainly not least my love, you actually can block anons!!! Hope this helps.

& I pray you have a very blessed day. Mwah. 💋

[eddiemunson-reader-shame]

A Freak and a Basket Case— The “Seven Inches of Satanic Panic” Edition

An Eddie Munson x OC Fanfic

The good lord (me) intended this to be an OC x Eddie fanfic, and by god, that’s what y’all are getting from here on. The original reader insert series will be discontinued for now, unless I really get the urge to go back and revisit it.

For now, just enjoy what I originally wanted. Which was over 3,000 words of self indulgent OC fanfic to help me get past these dark times. Life is too short to worry about being cringy.

Warnings: period typical racism, swearing, mentions of suicide, mentions of abuse (more tags to be added as the story progresses).

Divider by: @strangergraphics-archive

Pairings: Eddie Munson x OC

Word Count: 4,088 words

Chapter One - Don’t Talk to Strangers

“I'm danger, I'm the stranger.

And I, I'm darkness, I'm anger, I'm pain…”

Hawkins, Indiana was going to be hell on earth. Of that, Alejandra Perea was certain.

She didn’t want to move here in the first place. This whole situation was horseshit. Spur of the moment pendejadas from the family matriarch in command of a newly formed triad where there had once been a quartet. Leaving everything behind, even if it meant new and exciting things on the horizon, it wasn’t necessary. The family did not need a fresh start over in a new state.

No, what everyone needed to do was to start looking harder. She could still remember the advice given to her nearly a year ago, as it was the only solid and reliable advice she had received at the time. Expand the search area, but make sure at least one person stays at the home base. Keep the name in the media as much as possible, even if it meant taking out another loan to buy airtime on the radio stations locally. Question everything. Look for abnormalities, and above all: report, report, report!

Doing something was better than doing nothing, and if Alejandra’s family was any kind of concerned, they would be more aware of the rampant corruption and blatant conspiracy afoot throughout this whole situation. She could see the truth laid out in front of her, especially when there was a way to physically connect the dots. Soon she’d need another Big Chief Tablet to jot down her notes, and since the one sad little general store in town didn’t even have what she needed, the lack of consistency and the unfamiliar stationery was already making her panic.

So instead of playing pretend— telling herself that she would bide her time until she could find a way back home— Alejandra decided she was going to do what she did best when she wasn’t listened to: shut out the entire world, and focus her attention inward as her plan formulated.

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer…

“Sit up right, huevona! You’re going to mark my seats.”

Reluctantly, Alejandra slid her feet off the tan leather bucket seat, hoping that the battered treads of her Chucks left marks. Instead of facing her mother’s lecture, Alejandra spent the morning commute looking out the window with a scowl. She wanted to be anywhere but here. This podunk midwestern vibe was horrible. Unfamiliar. A hostile environment of mostly blue collar workers that could sniff out even the most light skinned Latina in a crowded room. Like a petulant child, she kept her thick framed glasses smudged with the oil from her cheeks. Just so she wouldn’t have to actually see Hawkins.

Her mother – Carla Perea– obviously noticed the scowl, and she sighed deeply before trying to speak again.

“I know you’re not happy, but this is a new start for us. Try to make the best of it, huh?”

Alejandra kicked at her blue Jansport backpack.

“And why couldn’t we just have moved somewhere else in New Mexico?! Chingao, you didn’t even think about it, you just put your finger on the map and ya!”

“Watch your mouth, Alejandra.” mom snapped, “And stop with that mocho talk! You know it wasn’t just putting a finger and ya. We needed a fresh start, and Hawkins was the best choice we could make. It wasn’t as impulsive as you make it out to be, it’s what’s best for all three of us.”

“And what the hell about dad?!” Alejandra demanded. “Huh?! How the shit are you honoring your marriage vows by just abandoning him like that?! Better or for worse my fucking asshole!”

Her mother's eyes narrowed as she drove. Obviously her daughter’s backtalk had hit a raw nerve. One of Alejandra’s new found talents was shit talking, the same venomous spitting that only cobras in certain parts of Africa and Asia had mastered. It had only been a year and some change since she’d honed the skill, but this kind of irate wit was too well honed for it to be new.

This talent had been latent. As if waiting for the perfect opportunity…

“What’s done is done.” Carla hissed, knuckles going from tawny brown to white grip, tightening her hold on the steering wheel.

“It’s been over a year, it’s time to accept he’s not coming back. Basta!”

“Bullshit…” Alejandra hissed.

And she would have kept going, if not for Carla deciding that morning to wear her leather belt around the waistline of her denim dress. And not just any belt. Oh no… It was the thick one with the sterling silver Gary Reeves buckle.

The thing about Gary Reeves: his silver work conchos with the fine needlepoint lines hurt like a motherfucker. Especially if there weren't any soft turquoise chunks on the front to cushion your ass from a chingazo. Alejandra wasn’t wearing the right kind of clothes for a fight, anyway. Months of trial and error taught her that her Wrangler culottes – along with a paperback copy of Heretics of Dune tucked in the back pocket– were the only acceptable armor if she wanted to talk shit back to her mother.

So instead of pushing her luck, Alejandra quietly resigned herself to her repetition. Unwilling and unmotivated to start a battle, when her mother was armed and willing to pull off into a Hawkins public parking lot to humiliate them both.

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

The Dodge Aspen continued down the unfamiliar streets at a snail’s crawl. Cars boxed them into the single lane going down Cherry Street towards the cluster of schools. Even though the realtor had boasted about the house’s proximity to the finest education in Roane County, the motorists of Hawkins, Indiana managed to turn a ten-minute drive into almost forty-five minutes. Luckily, Carla had anticipated this.

By five thirty that morning, mom was already blasting a mixtape of los classicos, banging on Alejandra’s bedroom door and setting off the barking of the family’s two dogs. Tiffany had almost tripped Alejandra in the bathroom, both dog and girl yelping as Alejandra stumbled and nearly smacked her head on the counter. Scruffy had refused to go outside into the dog run, so everyone stopped what they were doing and aided in chasing him out the back door into the yard with Tiffany at his heels.

And then that darned cat…

Unruly and orange Ripley had puked all over Jaime’s work pants, while he screamed at Alejandra to help him find another pair in his mess of a room. Useless from years of mi hito syndrome, he complained when his sister refused vehemently to take time from blow drying her curls to iron his creases. They’d gotten into a screaming match, until Carla finally conceded to do it for her son to “keep the peace”.

It had been a shitshow of a morning, an omen of things to come.

Carla blasted the horn at a green Gaucho with a white stripe that nearly sideswiped her, the dented vehicle trying to cut in front of their sedan into the lane and nearly taking out a couple of other cars with it.

“Pinches babosos!” Carla growled under her breath.

Alejandra was too pissed off to laugh.

The two women stayed in silence for some time, until at last Alejandra spoke up.

“You couldn’t have picked somewhere with raza at least? Like California?” she muttered, watching the faces of a group of younger teens crossing on bikes at the light.

“I’m light skinned, and I bet I’m the darkest one at school… A la chingada mujer.”

“What does it matter if there’s no raza here?!” Carla demanded, pounding her fist on the tan leather of the middle console, “Get over it. There’s no way we could have managed in California. I’m not going to kill myself working three jobs with your tios in Lynwood!”

“Enserio, mom?! You waited until right at the start of senior year, you didn’t want to wait?” Alejandra whined.

“Wait for what? Wait for you to fail another year in Pojoaque?!” Carla hissed, clearly fed up with her daughter’s bullshit, “I’m not waiting on you to pull your head out from your ass. So shut your mouth, and quit complaining or I will pull this car over. I swear to God.”

Alejandra shut her mouth. She tucked herself into the side of the passenger door with arms crossed, laying her head on the cool glass of the window and curtaining her teary brown eyes with her dark hair.

What could she say back to that?

Her mother was right. A reminder that she was a failure wasn’t necessary. The reminders of lost scholarships and a tanked GPA would follow her the rest of her life. And sometimes, if Alejandra pressed hard enough on the backs of her thighs, she could still feel the sting from the welts she’d gotten for failing senior year back at Pojoaque High School.

This change was stupid. A lot had changed in the past year. Too many things.

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

The reasonably happy, vibrant teenage girl that her mother knew was gone. Instead she was replaced by a bitter, angry young adult at eighteen years of age that had her innocence ripped away too young. Alejandra was now compulsive in her actions. Self-soothing in the oddest ways as old, pre-established habits became worse or new symptoms developed.

Pacing up and down the hallway listening to music on full blast was not anything new, chewing on the cuffs of her clothes or on the floss of her friendship bracelets was. As was the rebellion of dyeing all of her clothes some shade of black or gray. Carla had lost her mind when she saw all of the blouses, skirts, and Gunne Sax dresses had been dyed one weekend. It had taken hours to get the stains out of the washer and out of the bathtub at the old apartment back in New Mexico. Chalk that up to another lesson from the Gary Reeves belt.

And then she started failing all of her classes…

Much like any child, Alejandra had always been a bit of a space case. Living half in her imagination and reading weird books, or bothering her parents with second hand anecdotes of aliens and weird monsters. Like any other student, she wanted to spend her afternoons at play rather than at the family dinner table doing homework. Yet that had all been innocent fun. Science fiction books and fairy movies did not a troubled teen make, but lately that vivid imagination was shrouded in grimdark. She read gory novels of true crime and abductions, of both the supernatural and natural genre, rather than bothering with anything like cracking open a chemistry book or meeting her tutor at the library for help with remedial math.

Obsessive thoughts, spiteful biting comments, obsessions with dark media, lashing out and isolating away from everyone… This was not normal. This was not Alejandra Perea’s normal. To everyone else, it wasn’t like her not to care about things.

But she did care. Just not about the things everyone else thought was important.

She currently cared only about two things: the death of Frank Herbert, and Hector Filemón Perea.

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration…

“Mija, I know this isn’t ideal. But you’re strong. You’re going to do fine. Just please… Please try to make the best of this situation. Do it for me, huh?”

The scenery of green trees scattered among the brick-and-mortar buildings of Hawkins held no interest for Alejandra as she ignored her mother. Normally, she would have been captivated by all the greenery. Save for a few day trips to the Jemez Mountains, Alejandra had spent the majority of her life staring at the same desert scrub brush, sand wastes, clay mountains, and adobe houses. Along the road, there were trees and quaint little homes painted daisy yellow, gray white, or the occasional brick and mortar Georgian style home if the occupants were wealthy.

Not one person had the familiar mud brick walls or coyote fencing made of latillas and bailing wire.

Hawkins had boasted four seasons, farmlands with adorable animals, and that unique charm only available in a majority blue collar midwestern town. New Mexico had maybe three seasons and pissed off raza, but she would have given up four seasons and Midwestern charm for the sand and red clay mountains any day. New Mexico was closer to what was important.

New Mexico was closer to dad…

It only got worse as the car approached the high school. Carla pulled into the drop lane; the car still idle as she stared her daughter down with a hard gaze.

Absolutely no move was made to exit the vehicle despite the impatience of the cars behind them. Alejandra stared at the collective student body of Hawkins High with disdain, downright disgust even. As if she would rather swallow glass than get out of the Dodge. She began chewing on the sleeve of her large jacket, already beads of sweat were forming on her forehead from the balmy morning with high humidity.

“Stop chewing on it, you mensa, you’re going to ruin the sleeve!” Carla barked, swatting her daughter’s hand.

Alejandra moved the cuff away from her mouth but said nothing. Instead, she focused on fishing in the pocket of her oversized jacket for her one escape that didn’t have wheels. She produced a battered Walkman with a scratch and sniff sticker on the back. After opening the tape deck, she rooted through the various jewel cases of cassettes in her Igloo Playmate, yanking out a well loved tape from the depths and popping it in.

She pressed play. The volume was turned up so high that her mother scowled when she heard what was blasting from the orange foam speakers of the headphones.

“Come on mija, you couldn’t pick something happier for your first day?”

“Nope.” Alejandra growled, pushing the Walkman into her jacket pocket, “I’m not picking shit else. I’m going to play this fucking tape so loud, that everyone is going to stay far the fuck away from me. Fuck these people, and fuck you too.”

Despite her mother’s sputtering protests and grabbing hands she unbuckled herself, threw open the car door, slung the backpack over her shoulder, and slammed the car door on the way out as she ran towards the double doors.

Not even a whole minute had passed, and already Alejandra was making enemies out of the preppy crowd of Hawkins High. Stomping her way through throngs of students to the front office, she bumped the shoulders of anyone who got in her way, nearly sending some lanky string bean of a freshman flying into his little group of friends.

“Hey! Watch where you’re going, frigid bitch!”

She barely heard him over the music, but she did catch the insult.

Who cares? Kick rocks. Kiss my ass. Fuck yourself with a bent tire iron, you little fucking twerp.

I will face my fear… I will permit it to pass over me and through me…

She hoped the coordination of the day would repel everyone too, not just her shitty attitude. Unlike everyone else who had set up their first day back ensembles with care the night before, Alejandra threw whatever she had on hand on. That morning she came to school in a black cardigan layered over top a gray linen dress, black tights layered with dirty socks, beat up Chuck Taylors that had been everywhere from White Sands to TRC, and her dark brown curls straightened with her trusty Gillette Supermax, sprayed in place with a liberal amount of Aquanet. The piece de resistance was the jacket. Even though it was the end of August, she wore a large Carhartt jacket covered in kitschy buttons and patches. Even in the hottest months of the year, that damn thing never came off.

“What are you wearing that jacket for?” asked the school admin assistant, in lieu of a good morning.

Alejandra shrugged noncommittally as she removed her headphones. She stood awkwardly in the front office, and was about to say some smart ass remark when the admin’s hard stare stopped her sharp tongue short.

“... you’re going to boil alive before lunch…” muttered the admin, fanning her neck with a manilla folder, “Heavens to Betsy, I’m sweating just looking at you!”

“... I’m a new student. May I have my school schedule, please…?” Alejandra grunted.

“Ah.” nodded the admin, pulling open one of the drawers on her filing cabinet, “Name?”

“Alejandra Perea…”

“There’s no one here by that name. I only see an Alexandra Pera here.”

Alejandra winced.

Are you fucking kidding me, bitch? Where on my fucking birth certificate did it ever say fucking “Alexandra”?! And how in the hell is “Perea” too difficult for you to say?!

“Yeah… That’s me.” she admitted, then couldn’t help herself, “Alexandra Perea.”

The admin stared down from her imposing cherry wood desk, eyes laser focused at Alejandra from over the top of her large bifocals. Evidently, she did not appreciate being corrected.

“Young lady…” snapped the admin, tapping her eggplant colored nails against a file folder, “We do not tolerate troublemakers at this school. I suggest you quit playing your little games, and say your name correctly when asked. Is that clear?”

Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you-...

“Yes ma’am, thank you ma’am…” Alejandra muttered, looking at her shoes as she took the class schedule and locker assignment from the admin.

The headphones went back on as soon as the admin was done talking. That poor Walkman was blasting so loud, everyone else in the hallway was forced to listen in on James Hetfield’s vocals. That fucking bitch of an admin pissed Alejandra off so much, she could not help but lunge at and startle a few innocent girls in pastel color culottes as they passed by. It was her one line of defense; to deter the general populace of Hawkins High, she had decided to be a goddamned menace to anyone who could not give her a detention.

It was unfortunate really, because no matter how hard Alejandra tried to deter everyone away, it took her ten minutes to realize that Hawkins High– home of the Tigers– had fangs that could snap even the most ironclad of wills in half.

She was drastically underprepared for the high schooler’s reception to her take no shit attitude. One big dude in a letterman that she shoulder checked did not hesitate. He checked her right back, right into the tan lockers lining the halls. The resounding crash of her body colliding with metal was loud and embarrassing, causing a few passing members of the pep squad to point and laugh. As they passed they said hateful, evil, ignorant shit, screaming it into Alejandra’s ear while yanking her headphones off. They wanted her to hear everything. One even yelled out a slur.

All the hate caught her off guard, and she almost checked someone else by accident.

“Watch where you’re going, fucking gap tooth bitch!”

A foot flashed out from some wastoid and sent Alejandra toppling. She would have hit the floor and broken her glasses, had not her oversized jacket caught on the door handle to the girl’s bathroom. She hung there for a few seconds, and felt everyone’s eyes on her. Ugly peals of laughter followed. Her face turned crimson.

I will permit my fear… no… I will allow… No! I… I will permit my fear to pass over me and… and through me…?

It was fucking humiliating. She wanted everyone to go away and leave her alone. Yet in her hubris and rebellion, the attempts at being a badass only ended up attracting every kind of attention she did not want.

Pulling herself off the handle, she immediately threw open the door and hid in the girl’s bathroom. Pushing past a girl in a blue gingham sundress and a strawberry blonde side ponytail, she ran for the nearest empty stall to lock herself in. The tears could not wait until she was sure the bathroom was empty. Loud and uncontrolled sobs began to emit from her throat, the noises so awkward she did not hear the whispers of the other girls as they exited the facilities.

Fuck this day. Fuck this town. Her arm was hurting from where she hit the lockers, her pride was wounded, and Alejandra wanted out. If she could just run away now and hitchhike with the first car she saw, she would do it.

I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.

This was not how the second senior year was supposed to go. Senior year was supposed to be the last hoorah. A happy time to start preparing for reality. For college plans. Not a time to be stuck in a small Midwestern town that felt like a foreign country. And certainly not a time to be dealing with racist, shit attitudes.

Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration…

Dainty footsteps approached the stall as Alejandra bawled like a baby, a soft knock on the door making her freeze.

“Go away!” she cried, voice small and hoarse from the sobbing.

I will face my fear…

“… Hey it’s… It’s going to be okay…”

A soft, delicate voice answered. Not one familiar tone in that voice, the only hint to the identity of the one speaking was a pair of powder blue pumps at the opening of the bottom of the stall. Alejandra did not know the girl, nor did she want to.

“Go away…” she begged, face burning with embarrassment as she groveled like a prisoner for her freedom.

I will permit it to pass over me and through me…

“Please… Please just go away and leave me alone!”

And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see that you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes, cabrona… Quien te tiene?

The blue pumps hesitated, but eventually walked away. Leaving Alejandra to her sobbing.

She sat there on the toilet crying until the late bell rang, and everyone had cleared out of the bathroom to their first period class. With her glasses all smudged up from tears and snot, she took a moment to wipe them off with the hem of her dress, and eventually exited the stall with her tail between her legs.

Stopping at the sink, she began cleaning up. Alejandra took off her glasses and began washing her face with cold water. Blotting with a paper towel, she took a deep, cleansing breath and exhaled, before making up her mind.

She would not be going to class today, or ever again for that matter.

Every part of her mind was made up. Now it would only be a matter of time to find an out.

The gears were turning as she put her headphones on, fast forwarding the cassette to her favorite song before sliding the orange headphones over her ears. Maybe she could walk home, steal Jaime’s ranfla to make her escape. No, probably she should walk down the road to the elementary school and steal the Aspen. Mom’s sedan was inconspicuous, and it would blend into the sea of cars on the freeway better than Jaime’s well loved blue 1972 Chevy Monte Carlo.

Besides, the Chevy was out of the question until Jaime got back from work at the Hawkins Water Utility, and she was not going to wait that long for him to come home. The elementary school was a closer walk, and as she walked out of the girls bathroom without checking if the coast was clear, she began to formulate how she was going to break into and hotwire her mom’s car (she knew how to do neither of these things, but she thought a good old college try couldn’t hurt).

As Alejandra power walked to the front entrance double doors, she heard nothing. Saw only the sweet promise of freedom. Walking quickly, unaware of the noise she was making, and drastically underprepared for the biggest shock of her life.

She felt herself being snagged by the backpack straps, her heart dropping into her ass as she was pulled to a chest.

The headphones were yanked from her ears, and a low voice with hot breath began muttering in her ear.

“You’ve got bitchin’ taste in music there, princess.”

Alejandra jumped ten feet, and screamed.

“FUCK ME FREDDY!”

“ Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken. ” - Frank Herbert

[vxnillsstuff]

Hi! May I please request Fionna dating headcanons with a fem or gender neutral reader?

Dating Fionna Headcanons - Fionna (Fionna and Cake) x GN!Reader

——————

BACKSTORY (IN ORDER)

(This is like… in a universe where everything isn’t shitty? Like… how her universe was supposed to be.)

Fionna probably met you while on an adventure.

Her and Cake were fighting this big monster and we’re almost about to be defeated when you dropped in and saved them.

She thanked you and offered you to tag along with her and Cake. You happily accepted her offer.

You guys get along really well and throughout the months of adventuring around Ooo, you, Cake, and Fionna were like best friends.

One day, you guys were camping out in the woods since it was late and you guys didn’t want to travel back to the Treehouse.

You were sitting out by the fire that Fionna put together.

You could hear Fionna and Cake talking in the distance but you couldn’t decipher what they were saying.

Then, Fionna came over and sat next to you, warming her hands up on the fire.

She seemed… different. Almost anxious.

You turned towards her and raised an eyebrow.

She turned towards you as well and her face seemed… pink? Almost as if she was blushing… ^_−☆

You asked her what’s wrong and she immediately blurted out how she thinks she has a crush on you.

You pause, a surprise look on your face. You explained that you liked her as well and she seemed surprised.

You two talked about where you were in your relationship and what you guys were going to do now.

You two decided that you guys should just live with these feelings for a bit and see how things go.

About a month later, she asked you out!

She got you a bunch of flowers and made them into a bouquet with some twine. She gave them to you when she asked you.

WHAT ITS LIKE DATING HER (NO SPECIFIC ORDER UNLESS SPECIFIED)

She’s definitely cuddly and very clingy. She’s constantly holding onto you whether it’s the side of your sleeve or your hand.

She was very nervous to say “I love you” because she didn’t want to say it too early and mess anything up.

She was just very nervous in general but as you started to flirt more she loosened up.

She never had a whole lot of energy to clean so anytime you would come over, clean up and talk to her about how living junk isn’t super healthy. You didn’t mind in the end because you liked to help.

When it comes to fighting, you guys would just get into heated discussions but never like actual fights. It’s always over something silly and you guys always forgive each other after.

She is definitely a hoodie / clothing stealer. For example: “where’s my shirt?” you say. “It’s probably at my house somewhere.” Fionna responded, giggling.

You guys defiantly have a favorite thing. For example, you guys have a favorite song that you always listen to when together or a favorite snack you guys always get when hanging out. She’ll always be like, “(insert name here), ITS OUR THING!”

It’s definitely the little things when it comes to the relationship. Like, maybe you’ll set out her outfit or do her laundry. Maybe she’ll make you some breakfast, even if it doesn’t taste the best.

Double dates with Gary and Marshall are the funniest things EVER. Chaotic energy the whole time. (That’s a good fanfic idea… lmk if y’all wanna see that.)

She loves to make little doodles on paper and leave them on your fridge or at your desk. As well as little notes about how much she appreciates you and loves you.

Cake was definitely predicting your relationship. She’d always be like “maybe (insert name here) can help open that jar…” and yada yada.

When you stay the night at her house and the other way around, she always cuddles you and whispers little compliments in your ear. For example: “you’re so amazing…”, “I can’t believe your mine…”, and yada yada.

Dates are always something very simple other than going out with Marshall and Gary. For example, staying in watching movies, going out for drinks, etc. She isn’t too big on fancy stuff.

She’s very big on kisses. She likes kissing you basically everywhere but especially your neck.

STUBBORN. She is hella stubborn and will make a big deal out of everything single thing.

Note: I DID IT! Feel free to request more. 💙🌀

[krewekreep]

So the case of Nigga Eren/ Black coded characters in fanfic is getting WILD. Now as someone who was on tumblr when people would lowkey get weird if you asked for a race specific fic NOW it’s like because of that lapse in representation and the new wave of tumblr, there’s this overcompensation online for Black users to feel seen and build community. Sometimes I wonder if the writers know how to even write a fanfic (not because they are bad 🫤 but the fact a lot of them just seem like self insert smut) ((arguably that’s all smut on here but still work with me)

As a tumblr user in my 20s with an account over ten years old, I feel like I can kinda Grandma the situation. Both sides have a point which is why the arguing isn’t going anywhere. I believe Black women can be attracted to negative, toxic masculinity. (I personally don’t read alot of x black reader fics cause it’s just not what I like or how I get down in real life). These characterizations bleed a bit too into the real world where these traits and ways are very unhealthy, toxic, and unsafe.

“ITS FAN FICTION.” Bitch I don’t really care and watch who you talking to…

Both sides tryna have an absolute opinion is really annoying and y’all lowkey making Black centric fanfic an annoying community. 1. Yes, we all can ignore what we don’t like 2. Yes, there’s WAYYYY too much toxic nigga coded material to even get to something someone DOES LIKE 3. Whatever your age it’s okay to say I’m attracted to toxic behavior AND like to express it in writing. 4. If you don’t like it it’s okay to have a critique. But y’all blowing the Fuck outta me now 😂

Now imma lowkey be a little mean. NO no one wants to read a hood/ghetto coded White dude or Asian. It’s lame in real life, it’s lame online. Whatever YOU like (as a black person) IS ON YOU. Im not into Wiggas and Chiggas though. And as someone who identifies as hood or from that upbringing it’s a bit *anti-Black* to see every characterization of a MALE is black coded and unnecessarily controlling, possessive, RUDE, inappropriately horny etc. Like you are using REAL LIFE IDEAS OF PEOPLE to get your rocks off…take accountability for how that OBJECTIVELY looks…

All in all TBH enjoy what you want but nothing in life has EVER said what you like, what you do, and how you do it can’t be criticized. And I personally resent Black women who are not of a certain experience and obsess or fetishize men of their own race who simply come from a different lived experience (+ having an accent yall also fetishize) it’s weird…

You can be black and be a part of the problem, y’all not gonna stop cause you don’t ACTUALLY care but imma add my lil two cents…

[viridescent-din]

I’m going to be honest here, as a follower of your blog.. these anons are right. Tess wasn’t even included as a character in your most recent fic so there was no need to use her tags at all.

Yes other writers do it too. One of the anons even said that in their message. That the Tess tags are filled with Joel content because a lot of Joel writers are using Tess tags unnecessarily and unfairly.

As a tumblr oldie that reads a lot of fanfics and follows a lot of writing blogs, it’s always been common courtesy here to not use unnecessary tags for characters/fandoms that are not a featured in a post.

Sadly, more and more writers, yourself included, have started unduly tagging posts with characters/ships/fandoms that aren’t featured at all, and it is ruining tags for fans because character tags are being filled with content that isn’t involving that specific character.

The problem is that when politely asked not to do this, a lot of writers are being selfish and saying no, and giving the excuse of, “Well other writers do it too” - not realising that other writers only do it because they also see other writers doing it. Nothing will change and things will only get worse for everyone if nobody is willing to stop unfairly tagging their content.

Right now you don’t care because Joel is a popular character with a large following, so the original anons issue has no impact on you and your enjoyment. The Tess fandom is small, and majority made up of queer women, and yet her tags are overflowing with Joel x reader smut content. It’s unfair to them to have to pick through masses of unrelated content to find posts about the actual character the tag is meant for.

this is weird y’all.

i’m not saying the anons are not right. i’m also not saying i am. i think they have valid reasons to be upset, and i think i have valid reasons to continue to use the tagging system as i prefer to. i tagged tess because on my previous four imagine blogs (the first of which dates back to 2015. i’ve been here awhile), i was asked each and every time to tag characters that made an appearance or were mentioned because a lot of folks reading x readers are only looking for that character and the reader insert. every single new imagines blog i created. it’s what i’ve found works for my followers and i. it really is that simple. i’ve said now twice. i never used the excuse that other people are doing it so it’s fine for me to - if you’re going to have a discourse with me, that’s fine. but we can’t have a conversation if you’re going to put words in my mouth.

i find it necessary to say that i don’t really appreciate the implications of the last portion of your message. i’m a queer woman myself - my attraction to men is holding on by the thread that is pedro pascal. i feel like you’re telling me that as a straight content creator, i’m impeding on queer folks. do not assume my identity. i’m a queer woman who lives deep in hick town. queer identities are not something to weaponize. perhaps i’m misinterpreting the reason you feel the need to bring that up, just like you misinterpreted the anon who came to my defense’s words of “other writers are doing it” as my own. i hope that is the case. the lgbt community is suffering because of in-fighting.

this is such a chronically online debate. just block me. it doesn’t solve your issues with the other authors using the tag, but that is between you and them. with me, the button is right there. click it. it’ll take you much less time to do that than it will to send yet another message.

[truxi-twice]

- first character crush makes a comeback in a new show

- specific story involves said magical character falling in love with a human

- hit AO3 because now I’m in the mood for fanfic

- hooray, there actually IS fic for this character now! There’s even a fandom!

…

It’s, like. 95% Character/Reader fic

Babies. Sweethearts. Kids. I’m begging y’all.

Please.

Just write your self-insert.

For the life of me, I will never understand how this style of fic became so popular. And I grew up on songfic, dangit!

Like…how do you read a romantic scene, or any scene, and not immediately get thrown out of it by “Y/N” and all?

Like, at the end me of the day, it’s just self-insert, right? Only I guess it’s trying to make it “accessible” for other people? But like. I don’t see how the whole “Y/N” makes it better.

I thought it was just a fad, but it seems like it’s just getting more common?

[my-makeshift-masquerade]

Unpopular Opinion: I wanna see more self inserts, not more Y/N!

Y/N’s can be great for an indulgent and relatable story, but there are times where I see it just put in every story in an effort to make it more marketable to readers. I’m not against having fun, but I am getting pretty darn tired of seeing the same ditto anon lookin ass with a literal “Y/N” for a face.

The big issue for me is that writing a Y/N is essentially writing an archetype and then making them so void of unique and consistent traits anyone can hop into their skin like a body snatcher. There is only so much characterization you can shove into a Y/N without alienating some portion of the audience, because every reader is diverse. I find it counterintuitive to focus on Y/Ns in most stories driven by deep plots and characters, but I’m not against self inserts. In fact, I prefer my own self inserts over Y/Ns, even if that means significantly less people read my fanfics!

“Ewww, Becca, you prioritize your own self indulgence over pleasing your AUDIENCE??? CRINGE!”

No, I prioritize proper characters in my writing for the sake of entertaining my audience. I actually started out making my main OCs versions of myself, just like everyone does even if they don’t admit it. I eventually found it redundant to keep giving them new names and changing key features when they were always going to be a placeholder for what I wanted to be, if subconsciously. While self inserts can be used for indulgent purposes, I enjoy the challenge of making an actual character out of a new version of myself; one that fits in the world, and has a greater meaning than being a person shaped slot for me or readers to step into.

Needless to say, I take my self inserts seriously, but not too seriously. I play into the “cringe” tropes of “OC being related to a canon character” and “OC is too involved with canon” purely out of spite for how often I got told this was just “pathetic” or bad writing.

Unlike Y/Ns, I can make these characters multifaceted. When you view yourself and your traits realistically to see how you’d be in a narrative or world, making a self insert OC that extends beyond mere indulgence is quite simple. I would love to see more authors do this since, come on, Y/Ns and some of y’alls OCs can be clear placeholders for where you want your own self to be anyway! Just use that motivation and write yourself like you’re another character in your story of choice! I think these would be very fun to read through, and get everyone the exact representation they want!

[greengrayeyeswrites]

morangos com açúcar (chapter one)

Title: morangos com açúcar

Pairing: Dream x OC (fem!streamer!reader) x Quackity

Warnings: Mostly fluff. Mentions of anxiety, depression and ADD.

Note: This may be a Dream x OC story but feel free to insert yourself into the main girls role. If Dream ever announces that he doesn’t like fanfics about him, I’ll delete this.

Olivia + Friends — Dream + Friends —Prologue — Chapter 1 — Chapter 2

Authors Note: HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Olivia was staring at the prompt in front of her and rolled her eyes. She couldn’t believe she was actually playing Jackbox with some of the most famous Minecraft streamers that were currently out there. Sometimes she looked at the chat, but since she was mainly keeping quiet, answering the Quiplash prompt in front of her, Alex’s chat didn’t need to complain about her being a beard.

“Ten more seconds Olivia!” Alex screeched and Olivia rolled her eyes quickly typing in the answer to the prompt. “I’m done, I’m done!” The Gemini let out and lifted her arms, when the first prompt showed up on the display. It wasn’t the one Olivia had gotten.

“Forget the cat in the hat and prepare yourselves for blank in blank” Karl read before the answers appeared on the display. BadBoyHalo had written ‘Muffins in the Oven’ and Sapnap had written ‘Cum in the hat’. The boys immediately started laughing about Sapnap’s answer. Olivia kept quiet and voted for one of them.

“Liv, what’chu think?” Karl asked, realising how quiet their newest player suddenly was. “My opinion?” she pursed her lip and Alex looked over to her. He chuckled. “Y’all should see her face” he grinned, making his chat and the boys in the discord call go feral.

userjkl: That’s unfair! Quackity can always look at Olivia!

useryui: Thank god we can’t see her. 🙄

hatercvb: #cancelOH_livia2021

“So newbie?” Dream asked, “what’s your opinion?” Olivia nodded. “Sapnap could definitely do better than ‘cum in the hat’” Olivia started, “y’all don’t have to hold back just because I’m here. I’ve been friends with Alex for fourteen years. I’m used to inappropriate sentences.” - "What are you suggesting then?" Sapnap asked and Olivia grinned. "There was this super old song from Lonely Island... I think it was from 2009—"

"Dick in a box?" Alex said and Olivia nodded. "Exactly! That was the first thing that came to my mind, when I read the prompt." Just as Olivia finished her sentence the results came in and Sapnap won with a massive difference from Bad. “Thanks for voting Olivia!” Sapnap laughed, when the next prompt appeared. Olivia held her breath. It was the one she had.

“Before marmalade, Paddington Bear had a crippling addiction to blank” Alex read and Olivia felt heat creep up her cheeks. She had written the first thing that came up. “‘self made drugs’” Alex continued, “or ‘sucking whale penises’.” Alex started wheezing and Olivia heard the boys going crazy in Discord.

“WHO WROTE THAT?!” Dream yelled. He sounded as if he was banging his hands on his desk. "A WHALE PENIS?!" Olivia heard Karls voice. "DOES ANYONE OF YOU KNOW HOW MASSIVE THAT IS?" Even Bad was screaming. Olivia felt heat creeping up to her cheeks. "I'm googling this shit now" Alex said, typing away on his keyboard, while Dream asked again, "Who wrote that?" The faceless man was still wheezing and Olivia felt weird. “I did” Olivia spoke quietly, not sure if anyone heard her over Alex screaming that a whale's genitals could be up to 9'8''.

“Olivia!” Karl wheezed. “What?” the girl chuckled. “It’s not that big of a deal, right? Me making dick jokes, right?” She looked over to Alex, who gave her a cheerful grin. "I'm used to your jokes, but the whale penis is something new." He grinned.

Suddenly feeling self-aware she glanced over to the chat. She couldn’t really make out what most of them said, but she saw a lot of shocked emojis and stickers flying up in the chat.

"No offence, but this one definitely goes to our Newbie" Dream spoke, openly confessing whom he was voting for. Olivia blushed and waited for the results to come in. "Obviously Liv get's a Quiplash from this!" Karl chuckled.

The shyness and awkwardness she felt from the first time she interacted with the boys was immediately gone and even the bitter taste of the hateful comments seemed to be washed away for the moment. Olivia was happy to be with Alex and the boys playing a game she never played before and making them laugh.

They continued playing for another hour, mostly Quiplash and Mad Verse City, when Alex asked if any of the boys was streaming afterwards. Karl said he wanted to stream a little bit. "Maybe I'll join. What are you playing tonight?" Alex asked, while Olivia was leaning in her chair. "Probably a round or two of Among Us" Karl announced, "or GTA. Not sure yet. Wanna join?"

Alex told him he was thinking about it, before muting and deafening his Discord and saying his goodbyes to his Chat. His fans were sending some last minute donations and Alex took his time answering the last questions until he turned the stream off.

Olivia took off her headphones and watched Alex do the same. He pulled his beanie off with it and ruffled his hands through his dark hair. Olivia tilted her head and watched her best friend sighing and throwing his head back.

She understood all the fans who were crushing on him. Alex was a gorgeous specimen of a man. He seemed mysterious and exotic with his longer dark hair, his dark brown eyes and the lopsided, cute grin on his lips.

It'd be a lie, if Olivia would say, she had never had a crush on the six months younger boy. When she was thirteen she used to have the biggest crush on him. She was infatuated with him. But he was pretty childish back then and while other girls in their school started dating their crushes, holding hands and even kissing them, Olivia was content with just hanging out with Alex and playing dumb video games.

Her crush disappeared as quick as it came and since then, Alex had been nothing but her bestest friend.

"I know I'm handsome, no need to stare mi vida." Alex said and side-eyed her. "I'm not staring at you because you're handsome, I'm looking at you, because you look tired mi vida." Alex lifted his head and pushed his chair closer to the one Olivia was sitting in.

She was cuddled up in the chair, her knees pulled up to her chin. He grinned. "You haven't called me 'mi vida' in ages, Liv." Olivia rolled her eyes. "Don't get your panties in a knot, Alex" she slowly stood up and stretched herself. Alex watched her hiding her hands in her hoodie. "Already leaving?" he asked, a sad look on his face. "Yes." She simply said. "I haven't even told Diogo and Tomás that I was leaving, lol."

Diogo and Tomás were Olivia's older brothers. Diogo was twenty-seven and Tomás was twenty-five. Both very protective of their youngest sister. "They love me, they know I won't harm you in any way." Alex grinned and stood up, following Olivia to the front door.

Olivia opened the door and Alex grabbed onto her hand. Olivia looked down and cocked an eyebrow. "Clingy much?" she asked and gently took out her hand of his embrace. "Let's meet again this week" Alex called, while Olivia walked over to her car. She waved him and climbed into the seat of her car.

She looked over to the house once more, seeing Alex still standing in the frame of the door. Grinning down at him she sighed before she started the engine of her Mustang and driving home towards her and her brothers shared house.

to be continued…

Taglist: [open, comment to be added]

previous | master list | next

[liberty-barnes]

Miah’s 1K Celebration

so...

welcome to the mess that is my 1k celebration cause i’m unable to make simple choices and can’t stand the thought of letting people down

as you can see, i’m perfectly normal

the literal 1005 people following me would disagree on that but heyyy details

so anyway

one thousand

one bloody thousand people following me

my inicial reaction is whyyyy??? i’m just a bisexual disaster who sometimes writes a half decent fanfic but you deemed me worthy of your follow?

then i started crying cause yk

but bottomline is, i love you all, you’re the bestest people in the whole entire world, so i’m gonna make both a sleepover and a writing challenge

sleepover cause i like answering questions

writing challenge cause it gives me a chance to show you all other artists and discover other artists myself cause we all need them and they deserve more recognition

special shoutout to my mutuals who i’ll tag at the end for always being there for me and supporting me through every high and every low, y’all are the real heroes here

BUT ANYWAY, ONTO THE CELEBRATION PART, WHICH FINDS ITSELF UNDER THE CUT OTHERWISE IT’D BE TOO BIG TO PROPERLY REBLOG (i tend to ramble a bit, but you already knew that)

Starts: December 11th 2020

Ends: December 20th 2020

Who can participate: everyone, anon or not! no need to be following me either

send me asks for:

✨ my opinion on...

🌻 cast my mutuals as...

🎵 i'll put my playlist on shuffle and give you a song

🍉 random fact about me

🦔 what's my favorite...

🍀 i'll give you advice (or just listen to you rant, if you want)

💬 last text [insert person] sent me

💌 handwritten letter

🎬 movie rec

📖 fic or blog rec

📘 inspiration behind [insert fic name], how i came up with it or if you have questions about it

🖋 line from one of my WIPs (tell me if you want fluff or angst, i won't tell you the pairing or anything, that's no fun)

💋 kiss, date, marry [insert people]

🎤 give me a song an i'll do a mini cover of it (it will be 1min long tops cause that's all tumblr can take lmao)

📷 random picture from my camera roll (you can request a theme if you want, like pictures from my childhood or awkward pics or something)

Rules:

• Open to anyone (don't have to be following me)

• Send me a DM or ask with the prompt(s) you want (two people tops per work) and who you're writing about

• Smut is allowed but make sure to put it in the warnings

• I will accept works for any Marvel character or cast member, part of the Holland clan, 1D member or affiliated, Teen Wolf characters or cast member, Maze Runner character or cast member

• Can be reader inserts or not, but please specify it in your DM/ask too

• Tag me when you're done

• All works will be rebloged under #Miah's 1k writing challenge and put in a masterlist that will be specifically created for this writing challenge

Starts: December 11th 2020

Ends: January 11th 2020

Prompt list:

1. “Is that my shirt?” “You mean our shirt?”

2. “Home stopped being a place when you entered my life.”

3. “Stop moving and let me braid your hair.”

4. “Could you say that again?” “Were you not listening?” “No I was, I just like hearing your voice.”

5. “Can you just please hold me?”

6. “You come here often?” “Well considering I work here, yes.”

7. “Can I stay here tonight?”

8. “You’re really warm.”

9. “I’ve been in-love with you since we were kids.”

10. “Why are you wearing my sweater?” “Because it smells like you.”

11. “You are crushing me right now.”

12. “Darling I love you and all, but please get out of my kitchen.”

13. "I leave you alone for five minutes and this happens."

14. "I didn't fall. The floor looked lonely so I wanted to hug it." "Then why are you crying?" "It was an emotional reunion."

15. "There's no such thing as too many fairy lights."

16. “I’m leaving.” “Of course you are, that’s all you know how to do.”

17. “I love you.” “No you don’t”

18. “Any other lies left to tell me?”

19. “I miss the old you.”

20. “What happened to their happily ever after?” “Not all love stories get a happily ever after, sometimes it’s just once upon a time.”

21. “Lie to me. I don’t care what you say, just lie to me. Make me feel okay again.”

22. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave.”

23. "It's okay. It's not your fault that I couldn't be enough."

24. "Please don't leave me."

25. "You have the emotional range of a teaspoon."

26. "Will you shut up for once in your life?"

27. "This isn't about us."

28. "I will shove a christmas tree so far up your ass that when you open your mouth we'll see the fairy lights."

29. "I'm not crying, my eyes are sweating"

30. "Is that blood?" "Yes, but it's not mine." "Is that supposed to make it better?"

31. "I’ll drink to that.” “You drink to everything.” “Cheers!”

32. “Why is arson always your first answer?”

33. "What are you doing?" "What does it look like I'm doing?"

34. "I can explain!" "Then explain." "Okay, I can't explain."

35. "Get out of here with your facts. Just because you're accurate does not mean you're interesting."

36. "How many hearts did you break while trying to keep yours intact?"

37. "I know everything. It's in the job description."

38. "One more word out of you and I'll rip your throat out with my teeth."

39. "Do you listen to girl in red?"

40. "Is that code for something or am I just paranoid?"

41. "With how things have been going, I might as well start working at a circus."

42. "I love (him/her/them)." "Then why did you give up?" "Cause (he/she/they) deserved better."

43. "I want to ask but something tells me the answer will be more disturbing than anything I can think of."

44. "Do you think he's... *flicks wrist*?"

45. "Do I look like an idiot to you?" "Do you want me to answer that honestly or politely?"

46. "Just how clumsy are you?"

47. "So... the weather?"

48. "Just leave."

49. "Don't you fucking dare!"

50. "You don't have to talk right now. But whenever you're ready, if you're ever ready, I'll be here to listen."

tagging and complimenting my amazing mutuals cause y’all deserve it

@parkersbliss​ thank you for marrying me, first of all, and for being the most amazing wife one could ask. i wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you and i will never stop ebing thankful for your existence

@peterspideyy​ thank you for listening to my rants along with grace and supporting me during all my simping, you’re the sweetest thing existing since powdered sugar

@theamazingtomholland​ thank you for always putting a smile on my face, reminding me that i’m loved everyday and just being you, cause it’s the best thing you could be

@lozzypoz321​ thank you for listening to me rant abt my fics and how much i hate writing and then motivating me to write again or do basic things like get out of bed lmao (we still have the best taste in music)

@everything-is-alrightt​ kenzie lovely, thank you for being the pure little ball of unfiltered joy that you are cause even thinking about you and the jump shit your brothers get up to makes me smile like crazy, you’re amazing and don’t you dare forget it

@spider-trash​ thank you for being my brother, going alon with my ridiculous schemes for corrupting posie and making me laugh out loud every time you come up with something even worse, you’re the coolest bro i could ask for

and finally, thank you @fallinfortom​ for inspiring me to write in the first place, being an amazing mum to us, an actual good role model for me to have and for your random appearances in my dreams and the fun english teacher who makes us read tom holland fics instead of english literature. you’re amazing and i’m incredibly thankful to know you

love you all to the ends of the universe and back again, Miah

[xenteaart]

feel free to ignore my ranting but i’m just so frustrated??? 

disclamer: it’s very personal but also feel free to share your thoughts im happy to talk

the thing about fanfiction, right. it takes your mind off things. you get into those scenarios and it’s sort of like escapism but it also makes you feel things, especially when it’s reader inserts. and it doesnt really matter whether you’re a writer or a reader, i feel like its all the same shit because you get emotionally invested and then sometimes it feels really nice but sometimes it feels like you get this surge of serotonin (or whatever neurotransmitter gets released idk) and as soon as it’s gone you feel so empty. but not even because it’s a low after a high but because of what scenarios you find yourself in while reading/writing. 

lemme explain. fanfiction is both saving and ruining my life at the same time. it’s definitely been a distraction from my everyday worries and just generally something that i can pour my creativity and energy into and it’s such a lovely supporting community as well and i LOVE y’all so much. but also because of fanfiction my expectations and standarts are so fuckin high?? or maybe not let me elaborate 

they’re not even high in terms of smth unrealistic like “oh i’m never going to space in a TARDIS so i feel bad about my life now” or something like that. i’ve realized that all the regular normal things that are featured in fanfics just don’t happen in real life?? well, maybe they do in yours but they definitely don’t in mine. even the simplest things like chatting with someone at a bar or at a party or wherever. freely communicating with other human beings. fucking going out and having fun with your friends (and i dont mean that because of covid restrictions). like, for some reason it feels so difficult in real life?? your mind is constantly plagued with anxiety and all those thoughts like “oh what are they gonna think of me” “oh i dont have anything worthy to say” “oh this is so awkward and stupid”. it’s like i’m only living my life on 5% because as soon as the percentage goes up it becomes so overwhelming that i can’t bear it

like, in fanfics it all just happens so smoothly, just face to face normal human interactions, you know? and in real life it feels almost unbearable to even order a fucking coffee without feeling like you’re the embarrassment of the year. i don’t really know where i’m going with this, tbf i’m not even trying to make a point

well, maybe the only point i’m trying to make is that i am personally so used to non-real-life interactions aka texting and voice messages instead of just seeing people irl that i’ve clearly lost my ability of being a functional human and it’s fucking with my life a lot. 

and btw i wasn’t really saying that fics are ruining my life, i only meant that my involvement in writing and reading actually pushed me to realize all this?? like i dont even know what and who to blame?? because i feel like its a very common problem and its not just me being an anxious dumbass, i know lots of people that agree that it’s become incredibly hard to do all the simple things when it comes to merely socializing. and i just dont know why thats the case now. are we an anxious generation because we’re constantly on our phones and not present etc? or is there some other reason?? or maybe life has always been this boring for everyone and fics, books and movies just exaggerate it ?? like what is the case here and why can’t i get be fucking free and able to just chat and have fun

[1zashreena1]

Diego Requests an Audience -1

18+, m/f, technically OCxDiego Jimenez [Power]

Summary: Princess gets the rich bad boy equivalent of a call the next day from what she thought was a fairy tale of a one night stand.

WARNINGS: Ridiculous descriptions and 'the code is more like guidelines' outlook on grammar. Is it OOC if the character was given essentially zero development in canon???

Mentions of drugs/alcohol use, no actual smut in this one but references to multiple forms of sexual activity with m/f dynamics, plus size woman+fit man, early stage sugar daddy vibes, bad boys with too much money and not enough impulse control, secondary OCs, excessive swearing (???), illegal business dealings... I mean, its DIEGO

A/N: Princess took on a life of her own and has essentially become an OC. There are infrequent mentions of her description (specifically as plus size) and her actual name in later pieces (its Bicki). She started as self-insert so she looks like me. If that is not your thing, I totally understand. And do not feel obligated to read this, I will not be offended!

I'm not a fan of "plot" so be aware that most of this series is just meandering through their relationship, angst-fluff-smut whiplash style. But with dick jokes.

Constructive criticism is always welcome. I'm an old timer at Fandom but a baby content creator.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE read @chelsfic Princess pieces first, that is the beginning.

https://chelsfic.tumblr.com/post/613340476058304512/princess-for-1zashreena1-diego-jimenez-x

https://chelsfic.tumblr.com/post/618297838815920128/princess-awakes-diego-jim%C3%A9nez-x-reader-ficlet

Last thing before Murder Panther, I promise!

Huge, tremendous, throbbing THANK YOU to @chelsfic​ !  My fanfic creator mommy, I could not and would not have done this without you or your devious reverse psychology  You're gonna have to thwack me super duper hard with a rolled up newspaper to get rid of me because ily.

Massive shoutouts to @symbiont13​ @rosee-sensuelle​ @bunnykjm​ @mandoplease​ @nicke0115​ (y’all know what you did)

You're sitting in your car on your lunch break listening to the same song for the seventh time in a row because that is a thing that you do. When you like something, you like it. The song has pounding bass, if you close your eyes you can almost imagine being in a club. You never did get to do much of that, your twenties were spent working two jobs and sleeping in your car sometimes, so your just passed birthday weekend escapade was really something else. You've never done anything like that before and it was-

Ding-DING

Your phone chirps with a text message from an unknown number. You peer at the screen with a furrowed brow, I don't know anyone in California, must be a wrong number. You open the message cautiously, who knows what kind of weirdness it might be. 

Good morning Princess

What. No. There is no way. Absolutely not possible. Un uhh. Nope.

You should come back to NYC. I want to have you again.

Holy fucking shit. Its really him. It's Diego. Its Diego of the big brown eyes, even bigger hands, and absolutely the biggest cock you have ever seen. Diego viciously-gorgeous stupefyingly-rich incredibly-dangerous exhaustingly-insatiable Jimenez. 

Whom you most definitely did not Google upon your return home only to discover that he is an international criminal. Yeah, he's criminally hot.

You really do wish that little voice in the back of your mind was helpful. 

Yes, but he was nice to you. Really not helpful. How many times did you even come that night? There was the bed, the floor, over the back of the sofa, the kitchen counter (which he referred to as 'snack time' because he ate, and wasn't that adorable), and then that kiss/invasion of your oral cavity before you left. After he made you breakfast. And gave you a pair of Ugg boots that were magically in your size because it was cold out. Okay, so he was REALLY nice.

Wait. I didn't give him my number, what the fuck.

Hi Diego

And you hit send before you can stop yourself. What in the actual fuck am I doing?

I knew you remembered me. 😉Come up here this weekend. I want you

He wants you. He said it himself. Oh my god oh my god oh my god. Like, want-want? He saw you naked in broad daylight so he definitely knows what you look like. I want you, your mind just keeps repeating it. Hold up, is an international drug lord, cartel boss, top ten FBI most wanted man texting you with emojis???

I hadn't really budgeted on another trip so soon

Is that too much? Are you revealing your pathetic poor-ness and he definitely will not be into that?

Please🤚 Do you want to come?

Oh lordy, but he knows exactly how to word things. 

… I mean, yeah. Preferably repeatedly

Okay, yes, you've always been a pervert but something about this man only encourages you. Surely it wasn't how he laughed every time you made an innuendo. 

Then I've got you 💵😙 Princess👑

Do you want a hotel or stay with me?

Harrisburg is your nearest airport, yes?

Never before in your life have you had cause to use the word 'Baller' but here you are. Is he seriously going to fly me to him? Am I seriously going to go? What level of booty call is this?

Penthouse. Spoil me 😏

And yes Harrisburg. What are you going to do, fly me up there?? Lol

At this point you might as well see how far you can milk this. Also, apparently he knows where you live?

...yes. I have a private jet. I'll text you the info. We're going to have fun little girl😈

Well damn. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You send the entire conversation to Lisa in three screenshots. She calls you at 4:37 while she knows you're still in the car and you spend the entire drive home screaming together as best friends do. 

"I can't believe him! A private jet? Oh my god girl, you better bring home some stacks!"

"I know! Like, what the fuuuuuuuuuck! Lisa, Lisa, oh my god, Lis, what the hell should I pack?! Oh no, oh shit, I don't have any sexy pajamas!" Your high is coming crashing down. Its Tuesday, so you have two whole days to figure this out.

Her laughter is so loud it makes your speakers crackle. "After what you told me from that first night it sounds like you better pack a case of lube and an ice pack!" She dissolves into hysterics.

Well, she's not wrong. "Dude! I was so sore, I couldn't walk for days. This shit is BYOIP: Bring Your Own Ice Pack!" Lisa shrieks while you howl with laughter. 

"Okay, okay. Meet me at Macaroni Grill and we'll formulate a strategic plan of attack over carbs. We have to go to the Frederick's of Hollywood outlet." Lisa is already crafting a plan. 

"See, this is why you're my BFF!" You proclaim before you whip across three lanes of traffic to change course. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You take way more clothing than you could possibly need for a weekend but better safe than sorry. The private jet looks like it came straight out of a music video, you're afraid to even think about how much this costs. Hell, he even paid to have your car valet parked in the only locked and guarded parking garage at this tiny regional airport. There are all kinds of snacks and drinks on the plane, there's even a tiny galley and what looks like a daybed. Noted for later.

The driver who picks you up at the airstrip in New York is Bastian and he is pleasantly surprised that you talk to him. You're pleasantly surprised at how nice Escalades are on the inside. The last time you were in this vehicle you were a little, ahem, distracted.

Diego is extraordinarily pleased to see you wearing the Ugg boots he gave you. The man is all growly innuendo and (mostly) gentlemanly manners, the contrasts are mind-meltingly hot. The weekend passes in a blur of a good time; orgasms, a stroll through some really expensive stores, more orgasms, two clubs on Saturday night, another set of orgasms (Did I really let him finger me in a VIP booth??), your first time trying weed, a sleepy orgasm in a jacuzzi tub (Wet Diego, so gorgeous), the best brunch of your life, another first by having orgasms while on top of a man, and, just before you leave on Sunday evening, a very nice Brahmin purse that you gawked at in one of the stores on Saturday. 

Yet again, Diego corners you by the elevator and attempts to climb down your throat before you're allowed to leave. You have no complaints.

~~~~~~~~~~

The very next Monday you get an extremely sweet text very early in the morning thanking you for coming (all puns intended). Wednesday brings a cookie bouquet to your front door with a note stating that you don't seem like a flowers kind of girl. Incredibly early on Saturday morning is another text, he sounds like he might be a little drunk, confessing that he wants to do it again. 

You forward the message to Lisa with your own addition:

Look, all I'm saying is I'm gonna take this top shelf dick and all the gifts that come with it for as long as he wants to give it to me

It only progresses from there.

[tsipasce]

Same Difference, ch.01

Summary: When Chronostasis is almost crushed by a falling beam, a passerby, Nanami, saves him. In an instant, she disassembles and reassembles it into harmless bits of metal. There are no other witnesses, but after she leaves, he makes an urgent call. "Overhaul, we need to talk. Now."

A/N: As you can see, I am terrible at summaries, but this is a multichapter fic that began as a plain reader insert but morphed into a beast all its own. Anybutts, I’ll be putting out chapters every week because Overhaul is a dick, but I just can’t help myself. Let me know what y’all think~

Chapter links:  02

AO3 | Fanfic

It was a picturesque late summer day, the sun was shining brighter than All Might’s smile and the clouds were fluffier than Fat Gum— Man I should really.. not get into poetry. That was terrible. Nanami thought to herself as she began daydreaming. She’d been cooped up in her office for what felt like ages and the temptation to escape from her office was palpable. She’d call it an escape, but in her defense, she’d chipped away rather efficiently at her mountain of paperwork and her last appointment of the day wasn’t for another couple hours. Before the mental argument for frolicking over to the nearby café could be made, she’d already grabbed her keys and purse and was out the door of her office. Walking down the hall, she made small talk and greeted her colleagues and coworkers in passing. It had only been a year and a half since graduating, but she was confident that hearing her name with Dr. in front of it would never get old.  

“Well look who decided to leave their cave today…” a distant voice called from behind. The figure coming towards her was waving a bit too enthusiastically for someone who’d just worked 12 hours straight.

“ Ha. Ha. How very original ~” she replied dryly.

He stopped at a comfortable distance in front of her and smiled. Forgetting how nice it was to see a friendly face after being cooped up in her office, she reflexively returned a tired smile of her own.

Dr. Tanaka was one of those colleagues who was just cool enough to be considered an actual friend outside of work and after her own, long shift she could use a casual chat with a friend.

“Headed out for a break?” He continued.

“Finally, yes. It’s just too nice outside and mama needs a sugar rush. Want to come with?”

“No thanks, I think I’m going to finish my rounds and head home, but if you’re looking for sugar, I’d avoid the usual spot. Some petty criminals were caught there earlier so it’s cordoned off for the rest of the day.”

“Really?” She sighed, annoyed at the inconvenience.

“Yes, really. But, there is a place I passed by this morning that had one of the best mochas I’ve had in a while, you should try it out and let me know what you think.” He replied seeing her perk up at the mention of anything related to chocolate.

“Well, I’m down to do a little coffee shop research,” she replied having already made her order in her head.” I’ll give it a try.”

“There’s a good sport. What’s the worst that could happen? Here’s the address” he texted her the location and an adorable café with way too many sweets popped up—Tanaka was definitely a good friend.

Mentally already at the café, she said her goodbyes and headed out the door, determined to seize what was left of the day and some pastries.

 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 On her way, Nanami decided to take the scenic route. It was about the same distance as her usual spot, just in a different direction. Having already mentally noted the directions, she took the opportunity to really appreciate what she’d been missing. All the sounds and sights of a peaceful Friday afternoon. People walking about on errands, the sound of kids playing in the park nearby, and the smell of something amazing letting her know she was headed in the right direction. A creaking noise broke her out of her reverie and she looked up to see a load of large steel beams being moved by a crane. It seemed way too risky to be moving such large materials in a place that densely populated, but she figured they had to build it somehow and continued on her journey.

After another block she turned the corner, spotting her destination. Walking in, she was thankful the atmosphere matched the photos and had already planned on thanking Tanaka for such a solid recommendation. The barista actually looked like she was enjoying her job and cheerily informed her that the pastry she’d picked was baked fresh every day in-house to complement their homemade syrups. Could this day get any better?

While waiting for her order, Nanami got a text that her appointment needed to come in earlier, and she’d need to return to the office soon. Eh, that’s alright, I’ll still have 30 minutes to enjoy the food on the walk back. The barista called her name and she hurriedly picked up her order, assuring them she’d be back again.

One foot already in another daydream, she leisurely made the walk back to the hospital, taking in the sights. The people eating in the bistro, the smell of flowers in the local shop, the sound of the wires creaking and buckling above the strange man in the alley… Hold up.

Oh shit. Nanami thought to herself, already exasperated.

As much as people called doctors heroes, she wasn’t that type of hero. Her quirk just wasn’t meant for that kind of work. However, judging by how precariously the beam was dangling above his head, she thought she might need to reconsider. Before she could finish her internal conflict, her feet were moving. If I could just get in range to yell at him, he might be able to get out of the way in time. Maybe. Did she really want to take that gamble with a stranger’s life though? She knew the answer before it was asked, pressing forward towards the site.

He was across the street and she hopped over the guard rails, thanking her lucky stars she took a passing interest in parkour that one year in college. Just as she cleared the rail, the cord holding the beam snapped. Her heart sunk, knowing what she’d have to do. Unless he had a speed quirk, she was his only chance. She and her quirk...

Revamp? No, that sounds lame. Renovate? Okay well now I just sound like I have some weird home improvement power—but enough of that. Focus, girl.

He heard the beam falling and glanced upwards, his expression making it clear that he knew it was too late to use whatever quirk he had to get out of it. Right before the look of acceptance could settle onto his face, she jumped beside him, her hand stretched upwards towards the beam. Her fingertip and the metal made contact for a split second and then… “clink”. A thousand more tiny clinking noises followed soon after. She’d done it.

Though disassembling the beam into a thousand tiny nuts wasn’t amazing per se, it beat turning it into a plume of toxic dust for passerby’s to inhale or disassembling the beam into two and risking the halves falling onto another street or a nearby building. Judging by the very alive man next to her, she’d say she did a pretty good job for a not-hero.

It seemed as if the alley was closed off enough that thankfully no one else on the street had noticed the commotion, and the construction workers would take a few minutes to get down to where they assumed the beam would have landed. Now came the hard part: Making sure no one knew exactly what happened and that I was ever here.

Nanami was very secretive of her quirk. She used it sparingly to help people and perform everyday tasks with a bit of convenience, but deep down she knew it had the potential to be something else. She’d learned the hard way to keep it in check and avoided overindulging. Only her parents and her closest friends knew what it was and even then, she did her best to downplay it. Especially after the incident.

She snapped out of her inner monologue to see a very shocked man standing next to her, staring at her as if he’d seen something that was both extraordinary, yet familiar. He was a little taller than her but seemed close to her in age. He was wearing what appeared to be a stark white raincoat and had distinctive, pointy hair—not just pointy, she noted, there’s whole arrows at the end. Quirks really produce some interesting phenotypes…

Remembering that she needed to remedy the situation and get back to the office as soon as humanly possible, she broke the silence.

“Uhhhm, hi. Are you alright?” she began nervously.

“How did you ...” He still looked like he had seen a ghost, but she needed this interaction to end before the construction workers came and started asking questions.

“Look, I know this must be a bit jarring, but I really need to go. Will you be alright until someone else arrives?” She quickly realized being both direct and smooth was more difficult than she’d imagined.

An emotion she couldn’t put a name to flashed across his face and he recomposed himself.

“Could I at least know your name to thank you?” He asked innocently.

“Oh no, you don’t have to thank me. But if you really want to—just do me a solid and promise me you’ll keep this between the two of us, please?��� She said antsy and almost pleading, knowing the workers and passerby’s curious about the missing giant beam and metal rain could come by at any second.

He paused and she could tell he wanted to say more but didn’t. “Of course, thank you for you hel—”

With the verbal confirmation that her secret was seemingly safe, she ran like the wind out of the vicinity and back to the safety of her office. After recollecting herself, she realized her treats had gotten lost in the melee and her pockets were now full of various nuts and bolts. No wonder why it was so hard to run... she thought to herself, emptying out 10-15lbs of bolts from her coat pockets.  Looks like I won’t need to go to the hardware store for a while…

She quickly shrugged it off and walked into her appointment, already plotting to do nothing but sip some wine at home and chastise herself for not being more discreet about using her quirk.

 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 As Chronostasis was inspecting the sight of the Hassakai’s latest development, he had lost himself completely in thought. By the time he realized his error he was sure it was too late. He had never used his quirk on an object that large and in that moment of hesitation he feared the worst. Then in an instant, a woman stood beside him under the falling beam and did what he’d only seen one other person do before: Overhaul. With a single touch she disassembled the object and reformed it into something else. Perhaps it was a fluke, he considered, but if so, why did she seem so desperate to keep it a secret? As she bolted before he could finish his sentence, he followed her silently a few blocks before she entered a nearby hospital.

After reconfirming with himself what he’d seen, he made a prompt call, forgoing the usual formality in his calm urgency.

“We need to talk. Now.”

[alwaysupatnight]

Fanfiction Questions: 10, 17, 20, 28 and 46! 💖

10: Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in? haha SEVERAL. So, a couple years ago I was really into reading Arthur/OC or Arthur/reader insert stuff in the RDR2 fandom. I’m not a huge fan of the reader inserts tbh, but that’s pretty much all there is in that fandom and I was desperate. lol And because I didn’t necessarily ship Arthur with any of the canon characters.

And then this year for a bit I was reading Javier/OC or reader insert things from the Narcos fandom. And then Ezra/OC or reader stuff for the Prospect fandom (as tiny as it is). I have not and probably will never actually write fic for any of those fandoms even if I love them a lot. Oh and another one would be The Mandalorian series. Again with the OC and Reader insert fics. XD I don’t ship Mando with anyone okay. I JUST WANTED THE FANTASY WITH ALL MY FAVORITE PEDROS.

Also the Naruto kakasaku fandom. I started to write fic for it like a decade ago, but gave up. :P I still read fic of them every now and then though.

17: Who was your first OTP and are they still your favourite? My first ever OTP before I even know about fandoms or shipping was Lucy Knight and Dr. Carter from ER!! I was a child, but I still thought they belonged together!! That was pretty much my favorite show growing up too since I didn’t watch a lot of TV… Although I guess technically I kinda shipped Kimberly and Tommy from Power Rangers even before Lucy/Dr. Carter? But I don’t think I cared about it nearly as much. Mostly I was in love with Billy because he was the BLUE ranger and blue was my favorite color as a kid. XD

20: Any ships which you surprised yourself by liking? Probably adult!Cee/Ezra from Prospect. I went into that fandom thinking he was more like a substitute dad for Cee, but after a few rewatches of the movie it occurred to me that he is NOTHING like her dad, and they were too much like actual friends and partners, and nevermind that Cee was out there SAVING EZRA’S ASS that they started not feeling like a father and daughter duo to me. NOBODY WRITES ABOUT THEM THOUGH. I mean, I get that most people still see the father-daughter dynamics, but it’s a little upsetting that there’s basically only the one fic that pairs them romantically. lol I would write some myself, but I don’t think I could portray either of those characters authentically. But read Tethered by merlinus_ambrosius, y’all!! It’s amazing!! Although I would recommend watching the movie first. :P

28: If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of? Interesting questions. lmfao I would LOVE to see fanart of Losing My Cool, ngl!! Probably of Kate looking like a knockout (although the photographic evidence already exists) with Seth malfunctioning in her presence. XD Otherwise, I’d like to see something from some of the upcoming smutty chapters from that fic as well as from the culebra Seth story… >:) Or maybe just Seth visualized as a culebra would be cool!!

46: If someone was to read one of your fanfics, which fic would you recommend to them and why? Umm… probably one I haven’t actually written yet. XD Don’t get me wrong, I’m insanely proud of the ones I’ve posted, but I always feel like I could do more/better. Plus, I have so many more stories I want to write. istg one day I will get to them. >_<

That said, I would recommend Giving Up the Ghost because even though it is nowhere close to finished, I’ve worked so goddamn hard on it and writing it is such a pain in the ass and is killing me and so I feel I deserve the recognition for pouring my blood, sweat, and tears into that fic!! XD

Ask Me: Fanfiction Questions

[shannapage]

What’s up, friends! An update on life and my writing process. Short story (if you don’t want to read this entire thing), is I’ve ceased writing my prior WIP and am instead 7,000 words deep in a new one.

So, I came up with the idea for Untitled (WT: Mage) around Christmas and had been mulling over the idea for two months before I decided to start writing. I enjoyed the idea, but in the middle of plotting, I hit a giant roadblock. There were certain aspects of the world I just couldn’t figure out and I had no idea how I wanted it to end. I also had general concerns that the idea wasn’t fresh enough, but I had no idea why. I just... felt like I had read it before. It stuck in the back of my mind, but I told myself it was silly and forced myself to push forward.

Those of you who follow me on my fanfic blog may know this is unusual. I always finish outlining a story before I start writing, but I thought this time I would try something new. I began writing Mage not knowing how it ended (dun dun dunnn).

Enter April. So, at the beginning of April I decided to do NaNoWriMo, which is where you set a word count goal for yourself and work to complete within the month. I set a goal of 50,000 words for Mage. About a week into April, I also decided I wanted to write a story for my fanfic blog, Exes and Superher-o’s. Guess which one was easier to write? The 25K for Exes and Superher-o’s came so naturally, and I just didn’t understand why. I was forcing myself to write 2K a day for Mage before even I allowed myself to write Exes and Superher-o’s and somehow, I did that.

Then, I stopped writing and asked myself what I was doing. Writing is fun for me. Obviously, there are some days it’s easier to write than others but always, when I sit down and start, I remember why I do it. That was the moment I realized I just wasn’t excited about writing Mage. I didn’t feel attached to the characters, I wasn’t interested in their development and I felt my execution was sloppy. There was too much going on, the build-up was unnecessary and scenes were repetitive. I just didn’t like it, and I still had no idea how it ended.

I stopped writing Mage for a few days to see if I had any inclination to return and there was nothing. Zip, zero, zilch and that was when I realized I wouldn’t miss it at all if I stopped. 

PROGRESS, PEOPLE! It took me so much shorter this time to admit the story wasn’t working. I’m obviously disappointed. It’s hard to think about the fact that I’ve invested so much time into something I won’t necessarily get back... but now I think that’s kind of the wrong mindset to have.

I remember how much fanfic I had to write before I came up with one that I loved. I remember how difficult it was to write reader-insert and how I had to train myself to do so. This is basically a reverse process. I’m learning something from each story I write, even the ones which never see the light of day. 

Last time (with Walkers) I learned: it’s okay to give up, and (for me), it didn’t work to take a half-finished fanfic and force it into something else. I wanted to think of an entirely character-centric idea.

This time (with Mage): I need to have the entire story planned out before I start. It doesn’t work for me to just write and see where things go. I need to understand the entire character arc, or I feel I don’t know them well enough to write. Also, I have faith in my own ideas, but I can’t just... force myself to think of a great one. I need to give myself time and allow myself to grow.

Which brings me to where I am now. Once I decided to stop writing Mage, I actually mapped out an entire Rom-com called “Snapchat is Too Personal” which... I may save to turn into a fanfic LOL. I faced a similar dilemma there. I was having a hard time writing beyond the first chapter. The concept still intrigues me, but I still didn’t feel that drive. That going-to-bed-thinking-about-it, planning-world-details-while-I-do-yoga vibe I usually get when I’m really excited about a story.

Enter Stellae. I have a new idea, y’all! This idea occurred to me literally last Wednesday and I’ve already mapped out all three books and written 7,000 words of the first and second chapter. I’m VERY excited about these characters. Honestly, this is the first time I’ve cared so much about my creations beyond a fanfic I’ve written.

I’ll be posting a small summary of the fic/updates on progress later this week, but for now, I want to keep the rest to myself. I don’t want to jinx it lol. But! I also have confidence that even if this doesn’t work out, there’ll be another idea. I’ll learn something from this story, just like all the others and eventually, the novel will happen. 

Thank you so much to everyone who has sent me support and love so far on this journey! I can’t tell you how much your enthusiasm means to me and I hope to one day pay it back, ten-fold.