#even if it was a little harder to write

[razzle-zazzle]

Whumptober Day 26: Nightmares

"I'm haunted by the lies that I have loved, the actions that I have hated." -Poe, "Haunted"

2406 Words; Spiritshipping AU, takes place at various points during Possession and Tournament of Elements

TW for mentions of past death, past suicide

AO3 ver

Cole slid across the ice, unable to float on it like Morro could.

He cursed as he lost his footing, phasing into a wall before he came to a stop. He was a dancer! Balance was his thing! Why was this stupid ice giving him trouble!

At least the ninja were having similar troubles traversing the caves leading to the First Master’s tomb. Cole could take some comfort in that—which was strange, really, to not be the only one struggling. Since emerging from the Cursed Realm, he’d been behind in every way, not quite on par with the ninja. Not a part of their team, an incongruous piece that didn’t quite fit.

+=+=+=+=+

“Oh, screw this.” Cole walked through the wall, leaning against it as the ninja yelled and tried to avoid the beast inside. After a moment, he walked back to the door, grabbing at the lock.

“Hmm…” Cole wasn’t exactly an expert locksmith… “Guys, how do I open this?” He shouted, as the lock failed to give way under his strength.

It was Jay who reached the door first. “Wh—you’re a ghost!” He shouted. “Be the key!”

“Oh, right!” Cole kept forgetting he could possess things. Even though Morro was actively possessing Lloyd—Cole still wasn’t quite used to the idea that he could just… take over. Possession wasn’t something that was possible in the Cursed Realm.

Cole pressed his palm against the lock, and concentrated.

+=+=+=+=+

Sure, he’d been really helpful to them, putting his ghostly abilities to use to help them get the scroll of airjitsu and the Sword of Sanctuary, while doing everything he could to get the ninja out of scrapes along the way. He’d even thrown a rock at Morro once—though Morro had pretty easily slammed it down with a burst of wind.

But all of that was nothing against what the ninja had gone through together. Cole had heard the stories—Jay loved to talk off the ears of anyone near enough to listen. The Devourer, the Overlord, the Overlord Again, Chen’s cult—and Cole had been there for only the tail end of that last one, when Chen’s mage had summoned him from the Cursed Realm just to steal his power over earth. Cole just wasn’t a ninja.

He wasn’t truly part of the group.

+=+=+=+=+

Cole phased through another wall, trying not to panic.

Barely a few minutes ago, he’d been in the Cursed Realm, and now he was here, in some… underground maze? Completely bereft of his powers, thanks to that weird staff. Which wasn’t a huge deal, Cole had lived most of his life without any geokinesis whatsoever—

But he certainly wasn’t going to go back to the Cursed Realm empty-handed. It was an insult to his pride, really—and that everyone here was trying to send him back to the Cursed Realm was nerve-racking; what if the next wall he walked through led him straight to water? He had no way to know—

Cole stopped. This was different. It was a cell, if the chains were any indication. But the prisoner wasn’t quite like anything Cole had ever seen before; metal in place of the normal skin and flesh.

“Uhh…” Cole started. “Hi?” Should he leave? He should probably leave—

“Hello.” The automaton’s voice was pleasant, “You’re new.”

“Just got yanked out of the Cursed Realm.” Cole muttered, and then, “Who are you anyway? I thought robots were only in science fiction.”

“I am Zane; also, I am an nindroid, not a robot.” Zane answered. “What is your name?”

“Cole.” Cole offered, moving to sit down in front of Zane. “So you’ve been screwed over by these weirdos, too?” Something like sympathy twinged in Cole’s chest, even as Zane’s eyes widened at Cole’s statement.

“You…” Zane looked Cole up and down, expressive face showcasing a concern that made Cole uncomfortable. “Did Clouse kill you?” He sounded horrified by the mere thought.

Cole barked out a surprised laugh. “No! No, I was already dead when I got pulled here.” He reassured. “They just waved a stick in my face and stole—” He cut off, unsure if he should mention the whole “master of earth” thing. “A thing. From me.”

“Oh.” Zane’s concern vanished—something Cole was much more used to. “My own elemental powers were stolen as well.” He added, “I was not aware ghosts could retain their elemental powers.”

Morro had given Cole a crash course on elemental power and how it was inherited. “Well, I wasn’t aware nondroids could inherit elemental power, so I guess that makes us even.” He shrugged

Zane smiled. “I suppose it does.” He stared past Cole for a moment, apparently lost in thought or something.

Cole hmmed. He apparently had a lot in common with this guy. “Well, this is getting boring.” He stood, and walked over to the chains holding Zane’s wrists. “Whaddya say to breaking out of here and getting our powers back?”

Zane grinned. “That would be nice.”

+=+=+=+=+

But that was fine, wasn’t it? Cole was never going to be a ninja in the first place. He knew where his loyalties were. Who his loyalties were.

You are doing so well, little Geode.

Cole shuddered, then walked over to where the ninja were admiring their reflections. Apparently, the ice could show someone’s future, and Jay was crowing about how cool his eyepatch looked and how gorgeous Nya was.

Cole glanced at the ice, not really expecting much—he was dead, after all. He’d probably just see the Preeminent—

Cole froze in place.

+=+=+=+=+

“I got the scroll!” Cole exited the temple as easily as he’d entered it, scroll of airjitsu in hand. The sun was beginning to rise, bright golden light piercing through Cole’s translucent body. Of course, he’d been out of the Cursed Realm for a few days by now, so the sunlight piercing through him wasn’t anything new.

The three ninja cheered as Cole passed the scroll over to Zane, Jay slinging an arm over Cole’s shoulders. “You better slow down on showing us up, or Kai’ll get jealous!” He joked, as Zane read over the scroll.

Kai scoffed, then turned his attention to Cole. “You’re doing good, kid. We’ll make a ninja out of you yet.” He praised, making Cole duck his head, flustered.

+=+=+=+=+

That…

“Cole, what’s your reflection?” Zane asked.

Cole stared at his reflection. It was very green, he’d certainly expected that. And Morro was in it, which was a given. The Preeminent was a bit lacking, but maybe she was just too big to fit in the frame. Yeah. It was probably that.

“I don’t see anything different.” Cole lied, crossing his arms over his chest. “Just… me.” Even though the reflection looked older, and more sure of himself in a way that was making Cole feel distinctly uncomfortable—

A feeling in the rock beneath the ice made Cole turn away from the wall, looking down the tunnels they had come through. “...guys?” He started, sinking down into the ice to connect with the stone a little better. The moment he did, he knew—

Time was up.

Morro had arrived.

+=+=+=+=+

“Cole?”

Cole looked up at the sound of Nya’s voice, finding her standing in the doorway. “Hey.” he greeted, leaning back on the bed he was sitting on. The comforter wasn’t color-coded like the other beds, so it had been loosely assigned to him since his arrival.

“You doing okay?” Nya asked, crossing the distance between them to sit next to Cole on the bed. “Kai said you really helped in getting the scroll, but you’re not celebrating with everyone else.”

Cole shrugged. “I’m fine.” He responded, not really looking at her. “Just… thinking.”

“Penny for your thoughts?” Nya prompted, expression open. Trusting.

(Trust that Cole didn’t deserve.)

Cole leaned back. “It’s just… those three. They work well together, don’t they?” His eyes closed, the image of green-streaked dark hair and vicious smirk filling his mind’s eye. “They’re a team. And I’m…” He scoffed. “I’m just me.” He let himself fall back all the way until he was lying on the bed, legs hanging off of it as he stared at the ceiling. “I was attending a performing arts school when I died—I’m not—I can’t do the cool things they do.”

Nya chuckled. “But then you find out you’ve had an element all along, and suddenly you’re supposed to be a part of the group.” She finished the thought Cole was working up to, if not exactly in the terms he would have used. “I get it, Cole, believe me, I do.”

“I don’t doubt that.” Cole agreed. “But… I mean, look at you!” He gestured at Nya. “Even before this Master of Water stuff, you were Samurai X! You’ve always been cool, Nya.”

“But I’ve never been a ninja.” Nya pointed out. “And you’re pretty cool yourself, you know.” There was an emotion in her eyes that Cole couldn’t quite discern, something like concern in the twist of her lips that made him uncomfortable.

Cole snorted. “If you say so.” He could see the parallel, he really could. But—

They are not your family, Geode.

But Cole never would be a part of the team. Not really.

+=+=+=+=+

The tomb was chaos! Everyone slipping and sliding on the ice like a bunch of—had Jay grabbed an icicle to swordfight Morro with?

Oh, huh, so he had. Points for improvisation, Cole supposed—and Jay had proven to be very good at improvising. Almost scarily so—Cole didn’t look forward when that same improvisation would be turned against him.

Geode…

The Preeminent pricked at his mind, her presence clouding his perception. She was speaking to him, urging and crooning, and Cole let her cradle him. The fight had advanced while he was out of it—the ninja had found the Realm Crystal, and Morro was offering Lloyd in exchange for it. Cole moved to stand behind Kai and Zane as Kai offered up the Realm Crystal.

Cole wasn’t exactly keeping close track of things—how could he, when Morro was right there watching if Cole messed up? How could he, when the boy Morro had taken as host and anchor looked so… frail?

But… Cole’s eyes caught on dark hair and a vicious smirk. He knew where his loyalties lied. He would never truly be a ninja—but he could at least be loyal to his first real friend.

The ninja still had the Realm Crystal, though Jay was holding it now. Morro was starting to let go of Lloyd at Kai’s direction—

Cole lunged, a spike of rock knocking Zane aside as he phased through Jay to grab the crystal. Zane and Jay yelled, lightning and ice at their fingertips, but—

“Hey, Breezy!” Cole called out, “Catch!”

+=+=+=+=+

That had been easy. Startlingly so.

It was almost like they weren’t expecting the ghost from the Cursed Realm to stab them in the back. Which… probably said more about their willingness to trust Cole than it did about their intelligence.

Cole wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

“C’mon.” Morro urged, dragging Cole along. They had escaped into the Cursed Realm together, and were heading for the Preeminent, which was singing praises directly into Cole’s skull. Since Cole couldn’t really fly, Morro was sort of carrying him, holding Cole aloft by his shoulder as they flew along.

“What, no ‘thank you for getting me the Realm Crystal, Cole’?” Cole rattled off the barb and the impression easily, comfortably—and without any real energy.

Morro scoffed. “Thanks.” He offered, grip on Cole’s shoulder tightening. “I mean, I could have managed without you—” He cut himself off with a huff, and turned his attention back to flying along.

Cole sighed. The expressions on the ninja’ faces when he had betrayed them—

(Kai attempting to ruffle his hair after Chen’s apparent defeat—

The way Jay’s face would morph through expression after expression as he rambled, as though he was personally experiencing the stories he was telling—

Lloyd moving to try and shove him out of the way of a spilled cup of tea, laughing after phasing through Cole and falling flat on his face—

Zane explaining spinjitsu to Cole in a way that actually made sense—

Nya offering encouragement in that quiet moment in the bunks—)

It… stung. It wasn’t supposed to do that, to hurt. Cole was supposed to stick by the ninja until the time was right, and then return to Morro—

(Morro stumbling through an explanation of elemental powers—

Morro letting Cole rant about all the ways that his ballet instructor had sucked at his job—

Morro in Lloyd’s body, snarling in Wu’s face about all the ways that the sensei had failed him—

Morro laughing as he soared on the winds, moving through the skies like a dance—

Morro in Lloyd’s body, as vicious and cutthroat as ever, doing his best to throw the ninja off the mountain—)

“Hey, rocks-for-brains.” Morro poked Cole with his free hand. “Why’re you all mopey? We won.”

“We haven’t won yet.” Cole pointed out, reaching up to flick at Morro’s face. “And I’m not moping.”

“You’re definitely moping.” Morro refuted. “Is it because I wasn’t thankful enough? Or—” his expression turned serious, for a moment, “is the Mother giving you trouble?”

“It’s none of that.” Cole admitted. “I just… I almost can’t believe it.” He finally settled on his answer. “We got the Realm Crystal.” And they only had to commit so many atrocities to do it.

Morro’s eyebrow quirked, before he shrugged and started to descend. The Preeminent was still a ways away, but her presence was still very strong. They landed, Morro fishing through his bag to retrieve the Realm Crystal. He stared at it for a moment, that same vicious smirk that made Cole want to bite something and hold his hand simultaneously playing across his face.

Morro moved to walk to where the Preeminent could see them—

“Wait.” Cole grabbed his arm, making Morro pause. “I just… I’m…” He fumbled for the exact words, not quite able to express himself past the sudden knot in his chest. “Meeting you made killing myself worth it.” He said, painfully sincere. Immediately, he wanted to take the words back and bury himself in the ground.

Morro’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second. He recovered his aplomb, shrugging off Cole’s admission. “You’re not half bad yourself, Cole.”

That… Cole nodded. That settled it, then. Thinking about the ninja still hurt, but—

Cole knew exactly where his loyalties were.

[vampireposter]

meeting wyll at the grove, as someone who the tieflings trust enough to train their children, says so much about him. it's so sad that he doesn't get explored in acts 2-3 as deeply as the other companions, when his problems are equally intense. the average player probably long rests once before coming across the grove, but even if not, in that time wyll has already proven to the tieflings that they can rely on the Blade of Frontiers.

this is the immediate first thing he chooses to do after being condemned to slow death via ceremorphosis. his priority list in the first conversations with tav is: 1) hunt down a dangerous devil, 2) help zevlor with the goblins, 3) once nothing threatens the tieflings he will gladly search for a tadpole cure. wyll is perpetually his own last priority, and i wonder if it has to do with the lore about souls.

if he believes mind flayers' souls have been destroyed, and fiend warlocks will all have their souls sent to the hells after death, then becoming a mind flayer isn't the worst possible way for him to die. he would never become a mindless monster to save his own soul, but he's not gripped by horror the way that some of the other origin characters are. lae'zel has been made revoltingly impure to her people, astarion is terrified of losing the scrap of bodily autonomy he just regained, gale is guilt-ridden over the orb detonation if he dies, shadowheart has to survive to prove herself to her cult leader, and karlach has also just regained bodily autonomy and is desparate to live.

this is just another quest for the Blade, whose persona guards wyll ravengard against the vice of self-concern when he ought to be concerned for those in need.

[thisonelikesaliens]

jt620123 ig 05.20.24

writer/producer of the show posted a 520 (i love you) special that was pure domestic fluff with Qian and Yuan babysitting their niece. big disclaimer again, not a writer but tried my best to translate the joy i got from this piece and hoped i managed to spread some of that joy to this fandom

Not yet a year old, here Xiao Xiao Bao was again at her uncles' place. Xiao Bao had become a fairly well-known celebrity in the Asian entertainment world, and San Pang would be following her whenever she had to travel for work, which meant her brothers were on for babysitting duty.

Wei Qian never thought his sister's career would take off after getting married and having a child. These days, not many female celebrities would so openly talk about their partners and children, and perhaps it was exactly because of the way Xiao Bao set herself apart from the industry norms that she garnered so much support.

Wei Qian put down the magazine after reading the exclusive interview of Xiao Bao and her family (that he noted did not include her brothers). He picked up Xiao Xiao Bao who was happily entertaining herself and complained to her about her mom.

"That interview about your mom's family should've included your uncles, right? We're way more good-looking than your dad! Here, let me see…it's a good thing you look like your mom instead of your dad."

As if to show that she did not appreciate the disrespect towards her parents, Xiao Xiao Bao began to cry.

Wei Qian tried to pacify her but her cries became louder, so he picked her up and went to prepare formula, but Xiao Xiao Bao was still crying and wouldn't take the bottle.

Utterly defeated, Wei Qian had to ask for help.

"XIAO YUAN, HOW MUCH LONGER IS YOUR CONFERENCE CALL?"

Wei Qian put the bottle on the table and decided to check Xiao Xiao Bao's diaper.

"Sorry, give me a moment. I'll call you back soon." Wei Zhi Yuan ended his call and came downstairs.

As soon as Wei Zhi Yuan appeared, Wei Qian passed a still wailing Xiao Xiao Bao over to him.

"She's not taking the bottle, I think she needs a diaper change."

Yuan checked the time, checked the diaper, then picked up the bottle to check the temperature.

"It's too hot, run it under cold water for 30 seconds." Wei Zhi Yuan instructed as he handed the bottle to Wei Qian.

Wei Qian took the bottle and went into the kitchen, grumbling under his breath about the trials and tribulations of babysitting.

Wei Zhi Yuan sat down with Xiao Xiao Bao on his lap, wiped her tears and rocked her back and forth while humming. Xiao Xiao Bao's cries turned to sniffling and eventually stopped completely, then she grabbed Wei Zhi Yuan's finger and started to put it in her mouth.

"I'm so sorry, your little uncle lost track of time, you must be hungry! Don't be mad at your aunt, he can't even take care of himself…"

"Who did you call 'aunt'?" Wei Qian said menacingly while thrusting the bottle in Yuan's face. Realizing his mistake, Yuan took the bottle and corrected, "I'm the little uncle in charge of changing diapers~you're the best BIG UNCLE in the world in charge of feeding her~"

Pacified, Wei Qian sat down next to Wei Zhi Yuan and watched him feed their niece.

"I fed Xiao Bao like this when I was a kid too, and now I can't believe I'm watching you feed her and San Pang's daughter…"

That made Wei Zhi Yuan chuckle. Wei Qian yawned, then leaned on Yuan's arm, playing absently with Xiao Xiao Bao's little feet.

After Xiao Xiao Bao finished the bottle, Wei Zhi Yuan leaned forward to put the bottle back on the table and noticed that Wei Qian had already fallen asleep, his head sliding down and nesting comfortably on his lap.

Wei Zhi Yuan burped Xiao Xiao Bao while watching Wei Qian fondly, then bent down to press a kiss on Wei Qian's forehead.

"No matter who you are, from now on we will never be apart as long as we live."

[lineffability]

thinking how Aziraphale's outfits have gotten progressively less-white in reflection of his own morals/character progression and now find myself wondering if there was an instance, way back, when he first started wearing greys and beiges, and Crowley noticed, maybe even commented,

[qoldenskies]

Babagril I adore clipped wings and you are feeding my insatiable hunger for heavy angst and impeccable writing but I am a littol concerned about how fast you're putting chapters out recently. I know they've been on the shorter side compared to the beginning but plase don't push yourself too hard okies? We can wait, I just don't want you getting burnt out or something :(

Also you are so meanies to us why must Donnie constantly go through the horrors its the fic ive always craved and I am sobbing, thank youuu

hey hey im fine!! i should probably clarify that im genuinely just a fast writer and im. yknow. an unemployed 18 year old who doesnt have much to do other than stuff like this, and im fed and moved along by all the praise and kindness. you dont have to worry about me!! honestly a HUGE thing im aiming for while writing CW is the joy of getting to complete something, i actually crank these chapters out in like a sitting if im in a good mood LOL (theyre kind of scrappy, but im trying to combat my perfectionism. pretty much every time ive said im gonna take a bit i find myself too excited to, ive got a big hyperfixation on CC at the moment and all of the good reception has gotten me even more hyped bghdghfh. you have NO idea how much i stare at the fanart you guys have made for me ily....). for my next project i plan on writing a lot in advance and pacing myself better (especially because i want to do longer chapters for it), but for CW im happy to just speed through!!

^^ helped along by the fact that im trying to avoid making chapters long for the sake of it now. i dont really have a goal in mind for wordcount with this next set, because i think i want to think in what progresses more than that

and thank you!! teehee the thing i want to move to next is so much sillier but i do enjoy taking a real good dip into The Horrors....... not sure where i'll be going after wwww but its planned to be a HUGE undertaking anyway. but i will probably be returning to the horrors. and maybe CVD ive missed her my love

[willowser]

OKAY ACTUAL LAST THING AKFBRIWKAK but obviously, you keep your family life very private and your daughter is almost never seen in public bc that's how bakugou likes it, he doesn't talk about his family all that often bc he wants to keep it all close to his chest, and maybe he even gets a bit more shredded than usual by the media about it, as he already has a "reputation", but —

one day, a video that you took gets leaked, and it starts out with her sitting on your lap, chilled, relaxing, shaking some little rattle toy in her hand. and then the front door opens and you can see her peek her little head around like she's looking out, and then she's making some little humming noises and scooching off your lap and waddling away to stand in the middle of the hallway. and then katsuki comes into view and he stands there looking at her, glancing at you, before saying something that's too low to catch on camera, and then your daughter is squealing out some gibberish behind her chupie and running as fast as her little chubby legs can take her so he can pick her up and give her a kiss on her fat cheeks !!!!!

[seaofreverie]

Sparkstember Day 19: Lil' Beethoven (Ride 'Em Cowboy)

First of all, let this very important fact be known: the love I have for all three albums in the Lil' Beethoven trilogy cannot be overstated. I think I can safely call them my favourite pieces of art ever made. You know, when you look forward to something and it not only lives up to all your expectations but it's also just SO SO much more? Something about this neoclassical / dada / deconstruction of pop music / whatever-you-should-even-call-it approach is absolutely PERFECTLY suited for my tastes, and I didn't even know I was looking for something EXACTLY like this until I found it.

I think the circumstances of my first hearing of this album are pretty funny and something I got pretty lucky with actually (I often think about this with Sparks in general, as much as I wish I've known about them sooner I also do feel like they appeared in my life when I needed that the most. But anyway.) I was very eagerly looking forward to hearing it and finally seeing for myself what the genius of this album is all about. But I insisted that I can only do it through a physical format because yesss, let's make it even more *special*! The moment I've been waiting for! So yeah let's gooo, I need to wait until my CD arrives in the mail (that was one of the longest weeks of my life). And then I started to wonder, well, maybe I actually won't like it that much. To hype myself up to this extent and then be severly dissapointed - would have sucked!

Well, I was NOT dissapointed. Instead I was perplexed, confused, but also very intrigued and quite, ok not just quite, *completely* amazed already. That was the initial reaction and I think it's a rare but very beautiful moment when this happens - no need to *fully* grasp it right away, but enough to be all like "oh that was SOMETHING. I need more." As I said after that first listen (and I actually have my whole LIVE reaction to hearing LB written down lmao, that's how much of a big deal this was for me), I felt like it actually has to grow on me a bit still, gradually but surely with each next listen, rather than the 1st listen being THE prime listening experience. And that was very true! But it wasn't even gradual, it was very fast, seriously. And something very important that stood out to me right away too were the melodies - something about them, and that continues into HYL and ECOTD too. It's this classic feeling of: this always existed, or at least it feels like I've known it for years already. And as I listen more and become more familiar with them the magic still grows.

It's of course no coincidence to me that an album that relies so much on extreme levels of repetition is so addicting, even hypnotising. And once upon a time I thought that I couldn't like something that's too repetitive and therefore could be considered monotonous or "predictable". But nothing is predictable about LB actually. (Besides... ok, I'll get to that one bit later). But yeah, it's good for the brain. And it's been said before by others but this music definitely has this certain neurodivergent appeal thanks to all this, and, well, I love that aspect of it so much and I definitely relate to it on some level that goes even deeper than just song topics and instrumentation choices. It's in the structure and the fundaments of it all too.

I legally can't finish this without a dedicated paragraph to the 2004 Live In Stockholm performance because HOLY SHIT. Feeling so lucky again that all three of these albums got this treatment and we have recordings of these half-concert-half-performance-art pieces that we can now marvel at. I will say that like, a pretty big part of the sum of the appeal that LB has as an album is stored in this show and its visual and narrative elaboration on its themes. And also it's just so fun to watch! Sometimes I thought about how this might be an even better introduction to LB / this era of Sparks / Sparks in general than the actual album but well, never had a chance to test that and you know. Maybe shouldn't recommend Sparks with one of the most leftfield things there is to be found from them. Either way, very good, very important, felt like experiencing the power of LB for the first time all over again.

So now, please hear my exact reasonings for why I so deeply love (almost) every single one of these songs......

The Rhythm Thief

NO song made such a big impression on me the first time I heard it as this. I might have gotten more used to it after all this time but man, The Rhythm Thief, you will always be the realest one to me. This is what made me look forward to the whole album so much and convinced me that it would be like nothing else I've heard before. And that turned out to be so very beautifully true!

How Do I Get To Carnegie Hall?

I could listen to this one a hundred times in a row over and over and not get sick of it one bit. That's it, idk what else to add, beautiful and ethereal in every way

What Are All These Bands So Angry About?

Mostly I just want to direct everyone's attention to the bridge section, at the 2:26-2:52 time mark, which as far as I can say is the most heavenly piece of music ever made. Feeling like that Winnie The Pooh soul leaving his body gif each time I hear this

I Married Myself

Aromantic anthem, to me. Not that much to say actually but it's just, a very sweet and pretty song even when it might be taken as just this sort of ironic piece, I think it's this situation where a song can be taken more or less literally and it doesn't lose anything, rather the sincerity takes on a new sort of meaning? Because yes, maybe this hyperbolic situation (marrying yourself) COULD be the solution to the heartbreak of failed relationships. Ever thought about that??? Ok, stopping right here and leaving my I Married Myself analysis for another day

Ride 'Em Cowboy

My mind is blank on this one suddenly. But it's so good believe me. I love it a lot. It just has this LB spirit that makes it very addicting to listen to

My Baby's Taking Me Home

This was sort of the first Sparks song I've ever heard, or maybe that I quote-unquote purposefully listened to, and I think that's pretty important considering that it was the moment that ultimately lead to... all this. This song has always been incredibly beautiful and powerful to me, but lately it just makes me emotional to an extent that makes it hard to listen to most of the time. I WOULD sell all my material possessions for even one chance to experience this song live by the way

Your Call Is Very Important To Us. Please Hold

Earns soooo much as a live version, but even without that I think it's genius in the same way as The Rhythm Thief, and maybe the most disquieting piece here overall... If we ignore the next one maybe

Ugly Guys With Beautiful Girls

Sitting there hearing the intro of this song all like "huh, this is so chill and calm... too calm..." and then being hit with, well, everything that's going on in this song afterwards was truly THE MOMENT back in the day (and re: the predictability thing. idk though, it's not like, really an issue). Later on I decided that this sort of narrative nature of the song makes it have less replayability value than the rest (???) but I abandoned that opinion soon enough, thank god. I love it how long it took me to realize that this song and the ending of MBTMH are the only times when drums appear on this entire album (I mean no, I'm not very proud of that fact actually, as the self-proclaimed biggest LB fan in my area. And The Rhythm Thief literally saying "say goodbye to the beat"... come on man). So yes, sometimes less is more! I adore this song now it's such a treat I would gladly terrorize my neighbours with it

Suburban Homeboy

Ok, I'm sorry Suburban Homeboy fans but this is the only song here that I'm not a HUGE fan of. I still think it's brilliant and an incredibly fitting ending for the whole thing - the mood whiplash is amazing as this is the only "vaguely happy sounding" song on here, per my words from months back. And what's better than yelling WE ARE THE SUBURBAN HOMEBOYS! (I'm actually awaiting today's Sparks karaoke rating reveal very impatiently lol the reveal happened before I posted this and I'm very happy about it)

One more actually, a quick word on Wunderbar because it gave us two things that we might have not been able to do without: 1) this whole album actually (the fact that LB exists because of Wunderbar giving the Maels the idea to continue meddling with this style. Up there as one of my fav pieces of Sparks trivia) 2) anddddd the 21×21 performance of it of course

[usefulquotes7]

It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace. - Chuck Palahniuk

[scintillatingshortgirl19]

as much as i despise john house tbh i wish we'd gotten more episodes with him . . . partly for more of that sweet sweet Daddy Issues content but also. because there are so few scenes with this man i have to do so much fucking guesswork when writing him

[paging-possum]

was going to start writing an essay about the possible overlap between christianity and OCD and then I remembered im on Tumblr dot com and also a fucking idiot when it comes to putting things into words

[popiellart]

Woe, The Elder Brain/The Dark Urge fanfic be upon ye!

'OP do you take constructive cri -' i do not. enjoy it or perish.

[spaghett-onaplate]

it's literally not a good idea in any way shape or form but I want to get a second job in fast food

[krikeymate]

Thinking about an AU where 18-year-old Sam on the verge of leaving comes home to her mother screaming at her little sister. Sam's still high, the shouts ringing in her ears but the words formless. She's about to intervene when a slap cuts through it all. Her sister's on the floor and in the blink of an eye Sam has a hand wrapped around her mother's throat, slamming her against the wall.

Tara's climbing to her feet, eyes wide with fear at the scene. Sam doesn't look away from her mother as she says "Tara, go upstairs and pack a bag." Her sister doesn't move, so Sam turns away to look at her and repeats herself. Tara must see something in her wild eyes, because she runs up the stairs.

By the time Sam escorts her downstairs half an hour later, their mother is nowhere to be seen. Tara's led through the packing and into the car in silence. The what's happening?, the where are we going?, the are you ok? sits on the tip of her tongue, choked back by uncertainty and confusion.

Sam drives out of Woodsboro and doesn't look back.

OR

Sam, 19-years-old, long since kicked out of the house and on her way out of Woodsboro. She just has one stop to make, a goodbye she has to give first.

She sneaks into the house. The door is unlocked, she doesn't even need the key Tara hid outside for her, and it enrages her. Her baby sister is upstairs sleeping and anyone can just walk in.

Her mother is passed out on the floor leaning against the couch, snoring away and a bottle still in her lap. She creeps past her and up the stairs.

Sam perches herself on the edge of Tara's bed. Her sister is sprawled out on the mattress, the covers kicked off, and it makes her smile. She brushes Tara's hair back from her face and the smile falls from her face.

Her fingers trail down to the shadow around her neck. Sam reaches over to turn on the bedside lamp, catching sight of Tara's wrist at the same time. These are bruises. She wakes her sister up and demands answers from her. She doesn't like the answers she eventually coaxes from her. She likes Tara's attempt to lie to her even less.

She makes her pack, tells her to wait out front, that she'll be out in a minute. She kicks her mother awake, tells her she's leaving for good, and that she's not leaving alone. She tells her that she will never have the chance to hurt them again, and if she tries, well, she'll learn exactly how much like her father she can be,

[illuminatedferret]

in case anyone's curious, i've basically published just shy of 100k in 6 months, which averages at a little over 500 words published a day

[forcebookish]

so today i have posted about akktheo, posted gifs of topmew, posted forcebook pics and shared a forcebook fic for beta'ing, and am currently writing guncher fanfic

they've taken over my life so wholly and viscerally i don't know why i still act shocked at this point but oh my god

[gourmet-trash]

i know i'm not the first person to say this, but i've been seeing more of it than usual lately so it feels like it bears repeating:

don't put things like "this is so bad" or "i suck at summaries" or "sorry this is terrible" in your fic tags or summaries.

even if you FEEL like what you've written is bad, don't advertise that! even if you think your summary isn't good, don't call that out! you are convincing people that's the truth before they have even been given a chance to make that decision for themselves!

something i learned in a few public speaking courses/workshops i've been in over the years that i find oddly relevant to this topic is: do not apologize. specifically if you're giving a presentation and you say something incorrectly or you skip a data point - don't apologize! when you notice it, just calmly correct yourself or go back and cover the point you missed. you shouldn't say "sorry" if you can avoid it.

why? because people don't NOTICE that you've flubbed a lot of the time UNTIL YOU CALL IT OUT. they don't even think twice about it unless you make a big deal out of it. but when you make a big deal out of it, then it becomes A Thing. then that's something people remember about your presentation.

when you highlight that something is wrong or needs to be apologized for, you're putting that frame around the situation. saying "this is bad" out the gate primes someone to agree with you. saying "this is OOC" tells someone to be looking for the things that are OOC that they may not have really noticed at first.

i know for a lot of people who are new to writing, getting some positive feedback or a little validation on their work is the thing that makes you want to KEEP WRITING. but tags like "this is awful" make a lot of people automatically scroll past your story. you are depriving yourself of the opportunity to get that motivation if you're shoving your readers away before they ever show up! and you're steering away people who may genuinely enjoy your work by convincing them before they've even started reading that it isn't worth their time.

stop fucking doing that, little writerlings.

and if you're REALLY worried about it?? you're REALLY afraid people are going to hate what you wrote and leave flames in the comment box (i am so fucking old)?? make a burner account. post that shit anonymously. you might be surprised by the feedback you actually get.