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rxzennia · 10 months ago

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a promise of forever

– tales of the voracity pathstrider

✎𓂃 falling in love; promising an eternity in return. aventurine's real name, ~3k word vomit

aventurine has realized by now that he might just be in love with you.

okay, love is a strong word, let’s take a few steps back.

he isn’t too sure if he’s ready to make that commitment yet, so… at least, he wants you to always be with him. to stay by his side.

he has to make the first move because you would never

he’s terrified!! he doesn’t want to be the first one to offer his heart!!

but if he doesn’t you’d be perfectly content maintaining whatever you have right now

like… boss and assistant? friends? best friends? roommates? lovers? not yet?

aeons he hated how passive you are

it’s so damn obvious that you liked him back to a certain degree

but why aren’t you trying to hold onto him? why aren’t you trying to take up more of his life like he’s doing with you?

he wants your smiles all to himself; wants your hidden softness to only be directed at him; wants your affection for himself, all of you, including your leviathans

he loves, loves how you’ve opened up to him over time

you’ve gone from a ice cold slab of stone to a wall he trusts enough to rant at, then the highlight of his life that he doesn’t want to let go of

the way you would get upset whenever he tries to do something dangerous, even if you and he both know he’d come out fine

the way you would pick up the phone regardless of when or why he’s calling, even if you’re off duty and annoyed at him ringing you at 2am

the way you would, without considering his feelings, cringe and back away when he accidentally brings you food you hate, but ultimately feed it to your scarf because you don’t want to waste it

he loves them all. your reactions, your expressions, everything

especially when he’s probably the only one to see so much of you all the time

he wants to keep hearing you talk about yourself, keep learning more about you, even the parts of you that no one’s ever known before

he didn’t want to tell you all of that, yet he wants you to know

except you’ve made it very clear with your personality that if he doesn’t tell you, you won’t pry

and, like, you can’t read minds. neither can he.

so you’ve essentially forced him into confessing :(

if he wants your friendship (and more), he has to be the one who asks

aventurine remembers how cold you were at the beginning, so much so that he briefly wondered if working under him was amount to torture for you as it was for a few of his previous secretaries.

you never talked more than absolutely necessary, you've always had that terrifying glare, and couple these things with the fact that he rarely saw your face? yeah, you didn’t look like you wanted to be there.

he tried to transfer you elsewhere. under topaz, maybe, or even jade, or even some other department but you've never replied.

but you've replied to his texts before and after that?

you've just flat out ignored the transfer offer?

does this mean you don't want to be transferred?

that's probably when his fascination with you started

you, who's so detached and seems to dislike him, wanting to stay as his secretary?

he tried to ask you about it once, but all he got was “there's still a year before my contract expires”

which, well, yes, fair enough

but you should also know that if he's the one bringing it up, you won’t be getting into trouble for breaking the contract

he drops it, though, because he knows that there might be certain things you don't want to tell him

or perhaps you don't understand

he feels like you're very bad with emotions and expressing your thoughts

you are, honestly

it’s a different story with the permanent offer he made you a while ago, though

“are you sure?” you asked, with rare anticipation in your eyes

he chuckles, “absolutely.”

you try to hide your joy, but the speed at which you signed the paper is telltale enough

he’s also promoted you from secretary to assistant

even though you’re pretty much his assistant already

you don’t really know how to feel about that part

does this mean you’ll get even busier? not really? will you still be staring at contracts at 3am?

then comes aventurine’s offer for you to move in with him.

you’ve managed to finally notice that the dynamic between you and your boss resembles that of typical lovers in the media, but what do you know? one, aventurine is probably unused to someone else’s company so he’s compensating for it, and two, it’s not like you’re versed enough in mortal sentiments to make an accurate judgement.

he cuddles up to you in his sleep

he’ll smack your face accidentally when he wakes up and stretches

“this is the twenty-third time you’ve done this.” your scarf morphs into half a faceless snake and push his hand back down

why the hell have you been keeping count

you’ve mostly lined your morning routine up with his

efficiency, you tell yourself, it’ll be easier to keep yourselves on schedule

which means you find yourself with him at the breakfast table more often than not

he’s eating normally, while you…

you have a leviathan chewing on the entire plate, and yes that includes the ceramic

what about you? you’re preparing presentations and drafting contracts, of course!

or sometimes fighting for your life in corporate emails :/

is starting the day together really still simply “efficiency” at this point?

you’re starting to think you’re lying to yourself as the days go by

maybe you’ve been living amongst mortals for too long

because you find him so precious that you want to hold him dearly and give him everything

he’s so scared of being vulnerable, but he’s willing to lower his guard around you

what is this foreign feeling? what’s with this odd desire to protect? to hoard?

like how dragons hoard treasure, or how crows hoard shiny things

has anyone told you you’re terrible at emotions?

you’re terrible at emotions

you’ve memorized every little thing he likes and every little habit he has

and he noticed! of course he noticed!

are you absolutely sure you don’t like him even a little bit?

are you absolutely sure you have nothing to say to him?

must he make the first move when you’re so blatantly obvious?

he really, really, hates you (lovingly) for this

aventurine eventually comes to terms with it. if he wants you, officially, he’ll have to bare his innermost thoughts first.

there’s a period of distancing, and a period of overwhelming anxiety and overthinking all on his own. but even then you didn’t pull away from him, no; you were patient. you’ve asked, then left him alone when he turned his head away, then you’ve kept it professional. you didn’t question him again after, either.

it stung a little when you acted all formal with him, but it’s your little actions in-between that convinced him to finally come out and say it. getting him coffee the way he likes it, letting him find comfort in your presence at night even if he’s suddenly closed himself off, ordering his favorite takeout when it’s a slow day, covering his openings when you find yourselves locked in combat… you’ve always been looking after him, haven’t you?

finally, finally, aventurine decides to confess.

considering how little he knows about you, he (surprisingly) isn’t too worried about giving you his heart

well, of course there is the tiniest amount of doubt and fear

but mostly he thinks you wouldn’t betray his trust. mostly.

you’re a walking green flag, after all

maybe with the exception of when you’re left alone with monsters

but the way you treat him? green flag. massive green flag.

even after he’s told you a little bit about his past, you haven’t looked down on him at all

he doesn’t think you’ve ever looked down on him

though, he thought you thought him despicable when you first met because of the way you looked at him

not unreasonable with the stereotypes against his people and all

but you’ve proven his assumption wrong on your first day

you were totally cooperative and really… well, not nice, but not hard to work with, either

despite your unresponsiveness, you’ve kept everything he said in mind

that’s not how one behaves around someone they find distasteful

and after spending so much time with you, he realized that’s just how your stare is

you sort of… look down on everyone without meaning to

you have no idea how relieved he was when he could finally be certain that you’ve never disliked him

also! he can discern between your stares now

your resting neutral stare, your happy stare, your disgusted stare, they’d look the same to the average person, but not to him anymore

(he was super happy when he realized he’s got it all down)

he’s learned to read you because you’re so reserved and detached all the time

oh how he wished you’d tell him more about yourself

before anyone asks, he did try to dig up your past

imagine his surprise when he found nothing, like, literally nothing

the one time he watched you eat a monster whole was the first time he learned something deeper about you

he then realized that it wasn’t a coincidence that he couldn’t find anything about you

anyways, back to the confession

he’s come up with an entire plan in his head, but he really has no idea how to execute it

he wants to make it as memorable as possible for you!

except… would you even like a grand confession (of companionship)?

in the end, he took you out to a fancy dinner under the guise of “just another dinner date with your boss”

he’ll tell you his feelings at home

he has an inkling that you’d prefer it that way. intimate and private.

“hey…” aventurine starts, sitting down next to you on the bed after his shower, “i’ve been thinking…”

you naturally pull the towel off his shoulders and stand up to dry his hair for him. “you think?”

“stop, i’m serious,” he complains, punching your stomach playfully before burying his face in your shirt. “hear me out, you oversized snake.”

that’s the first time you’ve heard that nickname. “what?” you can’t help but be amused at the creative insults, then you let out a soft sigh and shut your mouth.

“you know how you’re now my permanent assistant?” aventurine slowly says, wrapping his arms around your waist as you work on his head, “can i… can we keep having this arrangement?”

you reply with a hum, but your tone slides up towards the end, like you’re asking a question. he chuckles, of course you’re confused, you’re so dense sometimes.

aventurine shifts around until he’s looking up at you. “this. you and i, living together, taking care of each other,” he elaborates, his eyes half-closed from how tired he is, “can you… stay?” then, with a quieter voice, he adds, “with me?”

you take some time to think about it as you toss the towel aside and bring out the hair dryer

from what you know about him, this is a very, very big request for him

he’s essentially asking if he can rely on you

even though he’s probably relied on himself most of his life

he wants to put his faith in you? you’re flattered, really

it seems like he’s also checking off a lot boxes for what people call “love”

according the the movies and books you’ve watched and read, anyway

but he’s not calling it “love”? is this something else, then?

you start blow drying his hair, carding through his blond locks with your free hand

he relaxes into your touch

“well? your answer?” aventurine asks, a slight shake in his voice as he peeks at you nervously.

“you sound like the protagonist of a romance movie,” you remark, leaning down to give him a quick peck on his head, “is this what it is?”

suddenly, it dawns on you why exactly were there flowers at dinner

roses, no less

but jeez, you did not need to call him out like that

what happened to oblivious and clueless?

then again, you’re bad with your own emotions, but you’re horribly good at reading others’

he flushes and hides his face in your stomach

he just wants to hear your answer, not hear you point out he’s probably extremely smitten with you

and it’s probably worse that you compared him to the lead actors in a romance movie

is he so obvious? is he not subtle at all?

does this mean you’ve known all along? you just didn’t want to make the first move?

or do you not feel the same way?

oh no, he’s overthinking again

“aventurine,” you call, snapping him out of his trance, “if you don’t say no, i’ll assume this is a love confession.”

man, why would you say it like that? it’s not that he can deny it, but if you’re going to be so damn straightforward…

“it… it is, i suppose, in more ways than one,” he whimpers in embarrassment, “will you, then, uh, will you say yes?”

he wants to trust you with all of himself so bad

finally he won’t have to shoulder everything alone anymore

he’ll tell you everything about his upbringing, even the ugliest parts

he’s been yearning for someone to hear him, to see him for so long

will you be his person?

he’s so excited and so scared

more scared than excited, actually

there are more issues he’ll need to work through, but for now?

he wants your promise

he doesn’t think he’ll ever come across someone as perfect as you again

so he really, really, really needs you to say yes

as the low whirr of the hair dryer comes to a stop, you set the little device on the nightstand and sit down next to aventurine. you sandwich his face between your palms and make him meet your gaze – you’ll never get used to how mystically pretty his eyes are – as you flash him a lazy smile.

“if you’re sure you want me,” you mumble; it seems that you are just as embarrassed as he is, “then… by all means.”

just as he’s going to throw himself into your arms, you stand up

?????? where are you going ??????

oh, you’re just going to put away the hair dryer and the towel

and also bring a spare scarf back with you?

did you forget that you have yours hanging on your neck

he’s so over the moon right now he’s all giddy and all over the place inside

are you perhaps the same?

when you come back, he practically throws himself into your lap

you avoid his eyes

holy shit you’re cute when you’re flustered

you’re blushing

you, who’s usually so stoic and unresponsive, is blushing!!

and trying to hide your face without resorting to your scarf!!

in the end you give up and instead pull him so close that he can’t see your expression

he doesn’t know what he’s asking out, you think, he doesn’t know what he’s trying to trust

which makes it all the more endearing to you

and it makes you want to make sure you live up to his expectations

this little mortal has you wrapped around his finger, and you don’t find yourself annoyed at all

in fact you want to shelter him and coddle him so badly that you’re tempted to act on instinct

tempted to. you can’t, because of a lot a lot of reasons

again, seriously, you’ve been hanging around mortals for far too long

you gently press his face into your shoulder. “aven-”

“kakavasha,” he corrects, “call me kakavasha. please.”

“okay, kakavasha.” you don’t hesitate, and you move to massage his scalp. “your real name?”

it seems like he’s in no mood to talk, because all he gives you is a quiet hum in affirmation; you agree with him, you don’t feel like talking much, either.

you pull away slightly to kiss right above his ear. then you did something he would’ve never expected you to do – with your nimble fingers, you wrapped the extra scarf in your hands around his neck, gave it a few loops then secured it with the same knot you use to secure yours.

what just happened

you slowly pull away with a soft pat to the piece of cloth

did you just give him…?

you did. you did, you mad danger noodle of incomprehensible mass

two faceless creatures with drool dripping from their maws stare at him

they’re connected to the scarf you put on him

he’s feeling so many things right now

even if he doesn’t quite understand what this means, he at least knows that you’ve given him a literal part of yourself

you’re very into this idea of being with him, huh…?

boy, he’s so glad he decided to confess

because he would’ve never known had he not asked

and what do you mean he would’ve missed out on something so wonderful?

this is also the first time someone outside of his family has ever given him something so precious and personal

he awkwardly reaches out to pet them

they nudge against his hand happily?

that’s weirdly adorable for a creature that has a diet of literal monsters

and much like satisfied pets, they disappear into the scarf after they’ve gotten their fill of petting

“for me?” aventurine- no, kakavasha asks, tentatively running his hands across the smooth fabric.

“proof of my loyalty to you,” you reply, taking his hand and placing kisses on his every finger.

what you don’t tell him is that your promise will last for eternity and beyond – even if you fight, or part ways, you’ll always watch over him. he doesn’t need to know that. not yet, anyway.

“you…” kakavasha feels like he’s a child all over again. he’s safe, he’s not making a wager, he’s not going to win or lose here, he can finally take a breather. “you have no idea…”

he buries his face into you, grabs your sides so he can press his body tightly against yours, and he sobs into your chest. he isn’t surprised at all that the scarf around your neck would wrap around him too, and he’s just all bundled up in you.

“shh, shh.” you pat his back and rock him back and forth. “easy now,” you whisper, “i’m here, kakavasha.”

aeons, he really, really loves the sound of your voice, especially when you say his name. when it was aventurine, you were reliable, loyal, and above all, gentle; when he finally allows you to call him kakavasha, every syllable from your lips drips with unspoken affection and a gratefulness that he’s unused to.

maybe someday he’ll finally be able to proudly profess his love to you. but at this very moment…

this is enough.

#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #aventurine #aventurine x reader #ares's voracity pathstrider tales

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writingwithfolklore · 23 days ago

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I Cut Out Social Media for 30 Days and It Changed My Life

Okay hefty title, but I mean every word of it.

Over January I followed a book called Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport. I'm sure you've already been lectured to death about how bad technology and social media is for you, so I won't repeat the statistics here. What I will say is that Newport suggests that there are also positives to technology and that abandoning it altogether is not realistic. Instead, he proposes that we define our values, and then use technology to attain them--rather than allowing technology to define what values we should hold.

To do this, Newport suggests a complete "detox" of non-essential technologies for 30 days. That means abstaining from social media, netflix and other streaming services, videogames, etc. But of course still being able to phone loved ones, email for work, and use google maps if you're going somewhere new, etc. In doing this detox, he proposes that we will be able to better understand what values we hold as people, not just as consumers of technology.

He was right.

At first I found it really hard. Right away I noticed that any activity other than doomscrolling and watching endless hours of Youtube took a lot more brain power. I started doing puzzles, reading, writing (a lot!), cooking and baking, and taking many walks with my dog. By the end of the day I'd be fuzzy and exhausted, and all I wanted to do was curl up on the couch and watch my favourite shows. I didn't, but I wanted to.

But then I started to notice my "brain stamina" (I'm sure there's a better term for it but oh well) started to improve. Instead of writing for two hours before getting fuzzy, I could write for four. And then six. And then eight. Slowly, I found myself being able to do more in a day, to focus for longer on one task, and I didn't feel as drained by the end of it. I had a clearer mind, I could remember things a lot better, I was no longer struggling to find really easy words--they just came to me.

This all also resulted in me spending so much more time with my friends and family. I realized that I really valued this time--and that it wasn't something I could replace by hitting 'like' on an instagram post from them. I rediscovered community, passion, and in many ways, humanity.

It was like I was looking at the world in a new way. I started to notice more, be curious about more. I kind of remember being this way as a kid, and I couldn't believe how I had ever let that go. Now, the idea of sitting on my couch and watching hours and hours of Youtube in every moment of my free time feels inconceivable.

However, my 30 days are up, and so Newport suggests setting some rules to reintroduce what technology I believe supports my values. I've decided not to return to Instagram, but that I do value keeping up to date with the gaming community and pop culture, which I do on Youtube. Now, Youtube is something that I watch for a couple hours on weekends, instead of eating up every bit of free time I have. I also value interacting with other writers and the writing community, so I've created a couple hours in my schedule to check Tumblr and my Discord and keep up to date with you guys here.

But now most of my free time is spent reading or writing, or being with my family and friends, and I value that most of all. To demonstrate how much has changed, in the months before my detox, I wrote maybe 2500 words. Since my detox, I've written 40 000. Last year, I read about four books. In just one month during my detox, I read 10.

If this sounds like something you'd be interested in trying for yourself, feel free to reach out to me! I'd love to talk more about my experience and things that worked or didn't work for me. I'd also really recommend the book, it was incredibly helpful in determining what rules were healthy to set and how to get out of technology and then back in with success.

Back to usual content soon :-)

#digital detox #social media #self care #digital minimalism #writing #creative writing #writing community #writers #writing inspiration #novel writing #readers #book community #book readers #fanfic #fan fiction #fic community #writing advice #writing tips #writing help

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mrinafria · 8 months ago

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Is Seon Jae corny?

One of the biggest charms of Lovely Runner for me is how it portrays a romance that is youthful, goofy, foolish and yet touches your heart in the most sensible and mature way possible. It doesn't forget it's a romcom at heart and serves us just that, so going into the show expecting a different genre is just unfair to the show (and yourself because you are the one setting yourself up for disappointment imo).

I'm not a big fan of immature childish romance devoid of any substance but that is not what we see here, despite Seon Jae being 19yo (or 20 or 34 yo). There's youthful anticipation, excitement and emotions but somehow Seon Jae's character (and Im Sol's character too, although she's always been 34yo in the main narrative) manages to transcend the notion of age and time with what he feels for Im Sol, the extent of it and the way he acts when it comes to her. Romance today is calculative and is often done in moderation, which is not necessarily a bad thing, because it is essential to learn to love ourselves too as we love someone special, but for both Im Sol and Seon Jae, loving themselves is also intrinsically connected to loving each other. Im Sol learns to appreciate life through loving Seon Jae, Seon Jae loves Im Sol because he appreciates what life has to offer.

This scene, for instance. I've rambled about this in the past too. It always warms my heart to see how, in all the timelines, he never gives up on life itself due to Im Sol not reciprocating his feelings/not remembering him. The guilt/heartbreak, longing and lovesickness are palpable in all versions of Seon Jae across all timelines but every time, he chooses to move forward in life (despite his heart being stuck in time with his Sol-ah), embracing everything life has to offer him. One of the things that becomes evident pretty early on in Lovely Runner is Seon Jae loves life. He may struggle sometimes but he doesn't think of it as a chore or burden to live on. He has things he cherishes, people he hangs out with, his dreams, aspirations, pain and struggle outside of Im Sol. He is not a pushover, he has stuff going on, he has a life. And he's not someone who'll casually say things like "I'll die for you" to anyone just to impress and get them to date him. Such grand statements don't usually make much of an impact on me as a viewer either but here, it somehow just works? Perhaps because we know he loves his life and wouldn't give it up no matter how hard things get, except for when he, his first and only love, part of his soul, is in crisis--tested by fate and time and death--and he is adamant about not letting it mess with his happiness, just like he wasn't ready to give up swimming despite Im Sol's warnings and his existing injury. That is the only time he'd make an exception: choose to live a short, worthwhile life, than live a long one devoid of any happy memories or love. It is not his childishness. In fact, he is doing what many of us can never, ever do. And perhaps that's why it doesn't sit well with some of the viewers; he complicates how we define love, happiness, fulfillment these days.

And come to think of it, he doesn't really say he'll die for her. He says Even if I die trying to save you, it's okay: it's a sad thing, Sol-ah. it's painful, yes, but it's okay. I might be worried for the remaining 14 years of my life, but that's because I'll have very little time to love you, to be in this feeling, to cherish the moments I make with you. I'll be sad that I won't see my first grey hair with you or be with you in so many of your big milestones in life, but it's okay. I'll try to make the most of whatever we get, now and tomorrow.

His sadness and heartbreak comes not from not being able to live his life to the fullest, but not being able to live his life with her. That exact same sentiment is conveyed by the final 2023 Seon Jae too, who doesn't even remember Im Sol or any of his old timeline versions and yet says the same thing.

The 2009 Seon Jae doesn't say 'I WILL die trying to save you'; he says 'if', there is a conditional. Even when he's aware of the impending doom, he doesn't give up on his life, on the 'if'. The guy with that face that has accepted a death that is yet to come, with eyes brimming with tears, with a heart determined to live hoping for an 'if' until then… when this guy makes such cheesy claims about his love and death, it's no longer an empty exaggerated promise. It hits a lot harder and leaves me momentarily breathless. That claim, stemming from the inherent human instinct to just want to be happy, and that non-calculative, selfless, pure kind of love, is exactly the thing I signed up for. That proclamation—simple, corny—is pain wrapped in momentary happiness, and my heart sinks, thinking just how fast he had to grow up in that short span of moments.

Ryu Seon Jae is like a North Star—he may not shine the brightest, but he shines bright enough in the same way, consistently, in every timeline we see him in. He is the star you could identify even in the sea of a million stars. Because that's how distinct his persona is. He may be corny and a loser, but he is corny and a loser exclusively for Im Sol, not in his life. That's the best kind of corny and loser one could find.

#Byeon Woo Seok #Kim Hye Yoon #Lovely Runner #Sun Jae #Im Sol #Seon Jae #선재 업고 튀어 #kdrama #kdrama recommendations #east asian drama #episode reaction

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sluttyenthusiast · 9 months ago

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Taking What You Can Get

Patrick Zweig x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of affairs and having children + sad ☹️

(This is absolutely based off of my relationship from real life 🥲)

You loved Patrick, you really did, you had given him the past 8 years of you life, dropping everything to support him in his Tennis career. You had been his perfect housewife without being his wife. Everyone around you start to felt bad for you, your relationship was going nowhere, you told them it was fine but they complained that 8 years of dating was too much for a man who couldn't commit.

You remember the words that came from your closest friends, your friends since college, that you're doing too much of a wife without being treated as such. They knew Patrick, and deep down, you knew it wasn't right. He had been your first, and only boyfriend, and every part of him consumed you, there was no part in your life that he hadn't taken over.

He moved in with you, where you paid the bills and bought the groceries, where he essentially lounged around rent free and occasionally won a tennis match, but you were okay with it, you loved him, you really did.

You loved him so much that you couldn't find it in yourself to be mad at him when he cheated for the first time. If anything, you were angrier at yourself, not understanding why you couldn't be good enough for him.

It was simple in the terms that because of your lack of effort (or so you thought) in your relationship that made it turn to another woman.

Really though, could you blame him? He was probably getting bored, and you'd rather him be satisfied than unhappy with you, so you turned your head and let him continue on.

It continued for months, and it began to take a toll on you. At some point you found yourself confiding to your friends from college, about how you felt and wondered why he was with you for so long if you weren't good enough.

Art and Tashi assured you that you weren't the problem, it had everything to do with the grown man who hadn't matured past 19. Their words comforted you for a bit, and they couldn't help to feel bad, or at least Art.

Over the years you and Patrick had grown close with the married couple, often inviting them over to yours for dinner.

You had all been friends during college but had drifted apart, you were unknowingly the glue that held them together.

They were grateful for you, you always invited them over for home cooked meals and offered to watch their daughter. You just loved playing house for a little bit with Patrick, imagining a life with a child of your own.

You often found yourself in tears while laying in bed after Art and Tashi picked their daughter up, wishing for a life in which you were married with your own baby girl, maybe even a boy. Tears would flow down your cheeks as you watched Patrick's sleeping figure, listening to his breathing as you thought of the life you'll never have. You weren't getting any younger, and somehow, you held out hope, but you knew that Patrick didn't want children, so you didn't bother him with it, he also didn't want marriage, so you pushed everything you wanted aside and settled for what you could have, scared to lose the one good thing you had in your life.

Now you find yourself coming home, speaking out to Patrick about how you had gotten the groceries and planned to make the dinner he had requested. Your voice fell on deaf ears as the grunts and moans from the bedroom filled the house. You knew better than to intervene, so you sluggishly put groceries away, keeping your head down as you refused to cry.

Minutes had passed before you heard soft footsteps, not bothering to look up before you spoke.

"Hey Tashi,"

#gracie writes #challengers imagine #challengers x reader #challengers fic #patrick zweig x reader #patrick zweig blurb #patrick zweig smut #patrick zweig imagine #patrick zweig angst #patrick zweig #art donaldson imagine #tashi duncan imagine

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yggdrasilhypno · 1 year ago

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So I have a question for you, if you don’t mind.

Can you resist someone hijacking your brain?

I mean, seriously. Can you?

I’d hope and imagine so, it’s not that hard to resist someone.

All it takes is some mental fortitude and focus on something and it’s easy peasy.

After all, you’re resisting control now!

Come on, don’t tell me you have no idea what’s going on right now.

This is all a ploy to have your brain drop its walls with reverse psychology, you figured that out by now I’d think.

And if you didn’t, well that’s not entirely a bad thing.

You see, when it comes to covert and the ideals behind it, it’s one of those things where if you don’t already know the tricks of the trade, it can be difficult to spot.

Think of it like a magic trick, the first time you see it you can’t believe your eyes but once you learn the truth behind it, it makes a ton of sense.

That’s essentially what covert is, and that’s what resistance is too!

Resistance at first seems surefire, like you could do it in your sleep.

However, once you really investigate how the brain is peeled back ever so easily, it becomes a bit harder to even gauge where resistance lies.

Do you resist the words im telling you, or resist the ideas behind them?

Am I hiding something within these words, or is it simply another ploy to lower your walls?

You can see where this all comes from, right?

Resisting me isn’t hard at all, I invite you to do it when you can.

Not because it’s something I always want for you, I do indeed want you to fall when listening to my words.

But, we both know what happens at the end of it.

You fall anyways.

It’s an inevitability.

That’s what makes it fun.

Like jumping out of a plane, you know your parachute will open and you’ll fall safely to the ground.

Resistance is the same in hypnosis.

You know you can resist, and it’s fun to try and fight that inner voice telling you to melt for me.

That’s why I invite it.

It makes it more fun for the both of us.

I want you to notice though that again, im using resistance as a ploy once more.

Simply telling you to resist me.

You know about reverse psychology, don’t you?

I mean, it would be silly for you not to think im using it right now.

I’m telling you to resist so that you hear those echoes in your brain.

Telling you to let down those walls because you know it’s your fate now.

And yet, you can still resist me.

You can still resist my control.

Or you may find yourself slipping anyways.

Maybe I told you to resist.

Maybe I told you to fall.

That’s the best part about knowing your fate though.

Like I said earlier, it’s all about that inevitability.

That you’ll fall soon enough.

And you will, don’t worry.

Hell, you may have already fallen and not realized.

Maybe you’re so deep now that the pretty fog inside your brain’s already destroying every thought you have.

Maybe every thought you have now is just something I told you to think.

But, that’s the best part about it all.

You don’t know what’s going on.

Why you feel the way you do.

And it’s okay not to.

Sometimes, it’s better to sink and enjoy the ride.

Or enjoy resisting me still.

You have been resisting me still, haven’t you?

No?

Yes?

Does it matter?

You’re still going to fall anyways.

It’s not like I’ve been brainwashing you in and out and in and out of resistance this entire time.

It’s not like you’ve had any to begin with anyways.

I could’ve just been using all sorts of reverse psychology on you.

Who truly knows?

Not you, that’s for sure.

You see, that’s the best part of the fall.

When we get here, to the end of this little adventure.

And you know what comes next.

I’ve told you a million times already about it.

You may even believe that number, it’s not like everything else I’ve told you has been fabricated.

But there’s one part to all of this that is the truth.

The ending.

You fall.

Just like that.

And sink, melt, drop, dream into the abyss once more.

And just remember for me, for a moment if you can.

When I started talking about resistance.

Don’t remember? That’s okay.

Maybe you didn’t have any before we started.

Maybe I just broke it all down.

But, you knew all along anyways.

You were gonna fall.

Good subject.

#hypnosis #hypnok1nk #brainwashing #hypnosub #hypnodomme #hypnotized #mind control #brainless #covert hypnosis

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the-earth-priestess · 5 months ago

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A PICK-A-PILE FOR THE QUEER GOTHS 🔪🥀🩸

(and really, anyone who wants to play)

WHAT'S HOLDING YOU BACK FROM LOVE?

rules: feel out the vibes of each set of images. you can take as long as you like, you can choose more than one or all if you want, either way it's better to go with your gut instincts. then read the corresponding info under the cut. take what resonates, leave what doesn't, have fun! 🩷🖤❤️

also note that this can be interpreted however you like. it doesn't have to be romantic love; it can be any kind of love -- platonic, familial, spiritual, or some secret other thing. anything you like. your limit is your imagination.

Pile 1.

Pile 2.

Pile 3.

Pile 1.

You are holding onto something or someone in your heart that is blocking the flow of your emotions. Whether this be a person in your life right now, a ghost of what was, or more like a collection of memories, God is encouraging you to let go. You don't have to forgive or forget, but moving on is essential for opening up yourself to new love. You need to make the space for it.

You need to remember that you are growing at your own rate, and that's okay. Comparison is the killer of joy. Allow yourself to breathe, and be kind to your own being, as you make progress.

You have someone you want to be closer to, and you could very well be if you pursue it. It's important to take the initiative. You never know unless you try, and you only increase your chances of love if you try.

You need to practice being assertive to be loved. Asserting your boundaries is an important aspect of healthy relationships and the key to being loved the way you need. You need to teach those around you how to love you, even if there's already an emotional connection. Real love takes effort.

You've been pushing yourself too far and too hard as well. Maybe you've been taking care of others without letting yourself be cared for in the process. You need to relax and take a breather! Let yourself regain your energy, because you need to learn how to love yourself amongst learning how to love others, too.

Pile 2.

Things feel chaotic in your love life right now, but instead of shying away from it, try leaning into it. Try looking at things upside-down. You might like what you see.

You've been reaping the benefits of your sown harvest. Your emotional capacity is plentiful and abundant, and so you could try giving where others are in need! What you give to the world returns to you tenfold; this is how the world and God's part in it works.

Your appearance is unassuming, perhaps... but you know the strength you hold within. This is a gentle reminder to not let the opinions of others sway you when you know that you are surrounded by love, warmth and prosperity.

You're nearing the end of a cycle. You'll be collecting the fruits of your harvest, and you can take time to enjoy them; the good and the bad and the in-between; learn and live. You will see another spring just like this one.

A difficult decision is to be made, but you know what you're going to do. You need not hesitate, and you will feel relief in the fallout. You will find your way forward from this, it will not last forever.

You have things you've been keeping from people, and not maliciously -- but it would do you good to get it off your chest. The other person might have something to share too, and you can grow closer through trusting each other.

Face your enemies and stand your ground. You don't have to sacrifice your agency for them. You don't owe them that. You're facing these difficulties because of them, and it is not your fault. Be good to yourself by allowing yourself to be heard.

You've been facing so many situations that are outside of your control, but the way you behave is not outside your control. You know what you need to do, and being good to yourself is part of the journey. Pick your battles. Listen to your inner voice that knows which ones to fight.

Recenter yourself. You've been wearing thin because of these struggles you've been facing, so take time for yourself. Find that balance, reacquaint your body and your mind. It will help you when you need it most.

Pile 3.

Seeds remain dormant for many years waiting for the right conditions to sprout. Now is the time to bide your time. Wait until you're sure you're ready.

You're plentiful in emotional energy right now, bountiful and steady in ways, but someone around you could be struggling. Who haven't you heard from in a while? Maybe you could check in with them.

Your needs are being overlooked by others right now; consider communicating to let yourself be heard. If you have communicated multiple times and it's never gone well? Consider cutting out that which doesn't help you prosper. It's courageous to choose yourself first and foremost.

Taking a break from love is not weakness, it is strength in its own right. You need time right now. You need time to process, to meditate on things. And that's okay. So take all the time you need and know your worth.

Take a step back and soak up some restful energy in the sunshine. You need to tend to your anxieties and worries; soothe them, or try learning how to soothe them. Become acquainted with yourself and how to self-soothe; it is essential that you relax right now.

You're grieving right now. Whether that be the loss of a relationship, a life or a connection entirely, this is a gentle reminder that you are not alone and that the love you cherished will return to you in a new form.

Thanks for playing! :) Please reblog and let me know how it resonated if you enjoyed! 🩷🖤❤️

#i've noticed a lack of queer readers in the divination tags so i'm coining my own tag #divine lesblr #queer #queer reader #divination #oracle readings #free oracle readings #pick a card #pick a pile #aroace #lesbian #love reading #spiritual healing #gothic aesthetic #aroace lesbian #why did this take so many tries to post hello #woc

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pinkpigtailsprincess · 11 months ago

Note

HI ANY TIPS ON BEING THE NEW KID AT A NEW SCHOOL

GENERALLY GETTING ANXIETY ATTACKS LOL

ALSO I LOVE YR BLOG SMM

𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ Doll tips! ; Being the New Kid!! 🎀⭐️

Tip #1 ; Taking a Breath now speaking from experience being the new kid at school is very nerve racking ik ive done it so many times and just sitting back and just breathing snd relaxing can definitely help just calm you down!!

Tip #2 ; Making a Good Impression!! now for this one i not saying you have to be the most outgoing person ever bc it can be overwhelming especially if you have social anxiety or you just have trouble with interacting!! but definitely being as polite as possible can definitely help you in the long run!!! ⭐️

Tip #3 ; Don’t be afraid to introduce yourself

now since you are new to the school you may or may not have to introduce yourself and ik how nerve racking this can be but doing a simple “Hi! I’m _” is really good if you don’t wish to speak then a simple smile and wave is also just as good!!!

Tip #4 ; Recruiting Friends!!

if you wanna be friends with a particular person try going up to them and saying hi to them also helping people with something is a way to get to know a person or having desk/table mates is like a gold mine for making friends with people !!!

Tip #5 ; Not Everyone is a nice person

if you can tell someone is a mean person stay away from them have little to no contact with this person its will save you all the energy and time because people like this can be extremely draining trust ik that!

Tip #6 ; Be nice but don’t be a pushover

obviously being nice is ESSENTIAL but never let someone cross your boundaries or disrespect you call them out on it don’t make a huge scene obviously but definitely let them know that you’re setting a boundary and if they cross again then cut this person off because obviously they don’t respect your boundaries!!

Tip #7 ; Don’t be a Bystander!!

if you see someone getting bullied say something about it,defend them or just ask them if they’re okay being a bystander to the problem makes you part of the problem as well!!!

Tip #8 ; Don’t let others bring you down

again with making boundaries never let someone cross you or make snarky remarks call them out on it and remember this person words obviously don’t matter what other people say doesn’t define you

Tip #9 ; Join a Club!!

joining a club can be an amazing way to make friends while also doing something you enjoy and over all its just an amazing activity!!

Tip #10 ; Don’t overshare!!!

unless you genuinely trust a person don’t overshare because people switch up and anything you say can and will be used against you!

Tip #11 ; Have Main Character mindset

even if you have zero confidence fake it till you make it!! walk with good posture and some pep in ur step!!🎀

Tip #12 ; If u have a group assignment don’t do all the work

omg i can’t stress this enough only do your part if someone is failing to do their part don’t do it for them let them fail thats their own fault

Tip #13 ; Being popular isn’t everything!

social hierarchy in high school or middle school (idk what grade ur in im sorry!!) is so bleak okay being popular isn’t everything i mean sure by some chance you’ll be popular but still you don’t HAVE to fit in because ur made to stand out

Tip #14 ; Channel ur inner Elle Woods & Cher Horowitz

* apply ur self in ur academics

* if you need help ask its not a bad thing to need help!!

* Make an Organizer to stay in top of ur work!!

* STUDY!! STUDY!! STUDY!!

* if you have an assignment with a rubric read it carefully to ensure you can get the highest grade possible!!

* if you unhappy with your grade or feel like you should’ve gotten a better one ask your teacher to review!!!

* wear cute clothes and style ur hair neatly not to for the lookism esque obviously but looking ur best and feeling your best are definitely good ways to feel better!!! 🎀⭐️

* have a “what? like its hard?” mindset

* Don’t Judge!!

* Pursue ur dreams!!

* Don’t be afraid of a challenge

* Be yourself!!

Tip #15 ; Don’t Leave people out!!!

say ur in a group setting and you see one particular person being left out and not getting their chance to speak make them feel welcome ask them about what they were gonna say and include them into the conversation!!!

Tip #16 ; Eat what makes you happy and don’t yuck someones yum

if someone has a cultural dish for their lunch DON’T EVER make them feel bad about it don’t care what it is that loser behavior! also eat the kind of food that makes you feel good inside and that nourishes your body i definitely suggest packing a lunch the night before!!!

Tip #17 ; Don’t hang around Slackers!!

be friends with people that actually apply themselves in their academic and working for what they want!!!

I love you anon i hope you do AMAZING at ur new school!!! 🎀⭐️

#the advice column with dolly 🎀⭐️#it girl #wonyoungism #self care #self improvement #self love #elle woods #cher horowitz #dream girl #pink pilates princess #dollygirl #dolly #2sweet2eat🎀🧁#girl blog aesthetic #girl blogging

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nethhiri · 7 months ago

Text

Chapter 54: Saccharine

Warnings: references to violence, menstruation

While you didn’t remember falling asleep, you certainly must have at some point. The thing about being blind was that light couldn’t make it to your brain to tell you what time it was, nor could it regulate your circadian rhythm, so you fell asleep and woke up at random times while your body adjusted to it’s new lightless cycle. You couldn’t tell what time it was, but guessed it was sometime in the early hours of the morning. It was an educated guess based on the hulking beast essentially roaring in your ear with every breath. That and the fact that you were in Killer’s room and Killer wasn’t there. Feeling around the side of the bed opposite Kid, it was still slightly warm. Killer must have just woken up to start making food for the crew.

Usually you would have gone with him to watch the sunrise and share coffee. Thinking about how you would never be able to do that again, for even a split second, sent you back to all the depressing thoughts you were having the previous day. Worse, Killer didn’t bother to wake you, knowing that you couldn’t admire the dawn with him. You would have still wanted to have coffee in his company. You could still do that at the very least.

As you lay in bed, a wave of nausea came over you, followed by the beginnings of a headache. The nausea was easily attributed to the antibiotics you were taking, and the headache could be any number of things: fucked up sleep, dehydration, Kid’s obnoxious snoring. It wasn’t enough to bother you yet. The only thing bothering you at the moment was figuring out how to break free of Kid’s hold so you could go pee. Over the many mornings you had spent with Kid, you were only able to remove him yourself occasionally. More often, Killer would have to rescue you. You were actually a little bit surprised Kid stayed with you for however long you had been asleep. You could tell he still had his clothes on so he must have been there the entire time.

Your hands searched out Kid’s face. One of them was over his mouth and the other pinched his nose. He twitched a few times and then thrashed to escape your grip for a breath. Instead of releasing you, as you thought he would, he only squeezed you tighter to him with a whine, making the healing wound on your chest twinge uncomfortably. You tried it again. This time, Kid’s own thrashing woke him up when he bucked his head back and hit it against the headboard.

“Ow fuck. What the fuck?” Kid’s groggy voice replaced his snoring. “Can’t ya wake me up in a more pleasant way? Like sittin on my face.”

“I could if you didn’t hold me in a vice grip . Let go of me. Gotta pee.”

When he lazily released you, you rolled on your stomach and scooted down the bed until you felt your feet touch the floor. As you stood up, you felt dizzy, but the feeling passed relatively quickly. You carefully shuffled your way to the bathroom, trying not to trip or run into anything.

As if suddenly realizing you were blind, Kid stumbled out of bed to help. “Shit. Lemme help ya.”

“I’m don’t need help. I’m fine.”

“Shut up and let me- OH shit yer bleeding!”

“Huh?” You felt the bandages on your chest. They were dry. “No I’m not.”

“Not there. Uh it’s- yer bleeding from-“ Kid pointed, again forgetting that you couldn't see.

“Oh.”

It was something that you hadn’t experienced in quite some time. And you would have been perfectly fine without experiencing it ever again. The familiar feeling of warm blood sliding out from your vagina to trickle down your leg. You might have noticed sooner if you had on panties. The cool wet feeling against your crotch was more noticeable than body temperature blood on skin.

“Are ya okay? Are ya hurt?!”

Kid broke out in a sweat when his eyes fell upon the dark red, clotty blood clinging to your inner thighs. He had pushed a lot of the bad thoughts about what had been done to you out of his mind, but they came flooding back in at the sight. His mind swam and he felt sick wondering if you had internal injuries. Although he had seen a fraction of your trauma firsthand, he knew whatever happened off camera was worse. And he felt sicker knowing that it was his fault. If he hadn’t opened his big mouth, maybe the worst of it wouldn’t have happened. Kid was about to run and fetch Killer for help, but you stopped him.

Putting the nausea, headache, and dizziness together, it all made sense. “No. I think… it’s my period?”

It couldn't be internal lacerations or anything of that nature because you had healed all the injuries that weren't infected somewhat indiscriminately, including any tears you had in the perineal area and anal and vaginal canals. What you didn't understand was how you were bleeding. Ever since the injury that caused your uterus to put out of commission, you hadn't experienced menstruation. It must have been your healing. You had inadvertently healed the scarring in your uterus. The hormones you had been given in captivity had made whatever endometrium you had left thicken in preparation for an egg to implant. The absence of them had caused the lining to slough, and now that your uterus had a patent cavity, it was able to exit. The dull ache of a cramp solidified your theory. You didn't really remember how your periods used to be, but how bad could it have been if you couldn't remember?

"Didn't think ya got those anymore." Kid put his hand on your shoulder to steer you to the bathroom, thinking about the misunderstanding where he thought he had gotten you pregnant in the past.

"I think I accidentally healed that old injury that kept it from happening." You cleaned up your thighs with some toilet paper. "Can you ask one of the girls for a tampon or pad or something?"

Kid shuffled his feet. "Uh... how?"

"With words." You didn't hear him move. "Well? Get moving." The sound of grumbling and reluctant footsteps faded off as Kid left.

You wished you could blame your recent emotional distress on this, but you knew it was the trauma manifesting. His sure did take his time. You waited on the toilet for a while before deciding to give your healing another shot. Although you still didn't feel well, part of it could be attributed to your cycle. Focusing on your chest, you willed your power to pull the skin across the scabbed over wound. Your hands lay on your chest to map your progress by poking to see which areas still hurt. Only a small area remained. Even so, you didn't have the energy to finish the job. As you waited, the cramps got slightly more intense.

The door opened and you called, "Kid?"

"And Killer." You heard the first-mate answer.

After taking care of your bleeding issue with whatever Kid could scrounge up, you let Killer change your bandages. You sat on the edge of Killer's bed, still in his shirt, now with some of his boxers on too.

"You were able to heal more? It looks much better."

You nodded with a pained expression, as another, stronger cramp took hold.

"Here." Killer put something warm in your hands, curling them around a cup.

You sniffed it. "You brought me coffee?"

"And I brought ya breakfast," Kid's voice interrupted.

Your stomach was rumbling in a bad way. "I think I better pass. But it was thoughtful of you to bring a plate."

"Eh Killer asked me to. But I brought yer pussy shit!"

You snorted. "Yes. Good boy. Thanks for bringing my 'pussy shit'." You made air quotes. It was clear that Kid wanted a little praise for helping. Though you would put money on it that Heat actually had to ask the girls for feminine products and Kid was too embarrassed.

"Can I eat this then?" Kid was not about to waste Killer's cooking.

"Knock yourself out."

"Sweet." Kid's feet headed toward the door. "I'm gonna be in the shop." He slowed down and trotted back toward you to press a kiss on your cheek. "Feel better, bunny." Kid practically skipped out of the room.

Your cheeks were hot as he called you by the pet name he normally reserved for more intimate times. It was just Killer there, but still. You lifted the coffee he brought you to your mouth and blew on the surface so you wouldn't burn your tongue, scooting back on the bed so that you could lean against the headboard and have your legs out. The mug was nice and warm. After taking a few sips, you placed it right over your lower stomach to ease the cramps, which were rolling in more frequently and worse. You heard the drag of a mug from the side table and felt the bed dip. Then there was an arm around you, pulling you in to lean on Killer's side. You heard him take a drink.

"You didn't have your coffee yet?"

"I wanted to share it with you. Like we always do."

"Minus the sunrise."

"Got it covered, darlin." There was the sound of paper unfolding. Killer cleared his throat. "Dark blue, purpley-pink, coral, bright orange, pale yellow, sky blue. Four fish jumps, two seagulls, one pelican, one mama whale and baby, and one sea king."

You felt guilty about earlier when you thought that he had done your thing by himself. You didn't expect this. This went beyond a nice gesture. This was loving. He watched the sunrise for the both of you and wrote everything down? You had to turn your face from him and say something snarky so you didn't tear up. "You're lying about the sea king."

"I'm not. Swear on Kid's life."

You humphed. "Not fair." They were always a sight to behold, no matter how many you had seen.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, just enjoying the time together. You sipped your coffee until there was nothing left. Killer made it exactly how you liked it. He took the empty mug from you and set it on the side table. Drinking coffee on an empty, mildly upset stomach was not the best thing to do, but it was the only thing you thought you could keep down for now. Killer rubbed your arm with his fingers in light circles.

"Kid seems to be in an uncharacteristically good mood lately," you mused. He hadn't even stomped once since you had been better.

"He's relieved that you're alive." Killer paused. "No one was sure if we would get you back. I think we convinced ourselves that when, if, we found you, it would be too late. If we did that, then we couldn't be disappointed if that was exactly the case. Any outcome that ended with you being alive was more than we could have dared hope for. Everyone wanted to believe we would find you alive, but we were too scared that we would be let down." His arm tightened around you. "Sorry. I didn't mean to get heavy."

"I didn't think... everyone cared that much. I mean you and Kid... yeah, but everyone else?"

"You are part of the crew. The crew is our family. You are our family." Killer paused. "If it were Quincy or Emma, wouldn't you feel the same?"

"Yeah... but I haven't been a part of the crew for as long. I'm not as integrated."

"What are you talking about? You've healed every single person on this ship at some point. You've fought for every single person on this ship and risked your life more than once." In a more gentle tone, Killer added, "When are you going to accept that you are worthy of being loved? And I'm not only talking about Kid and I." He meant them, and Heat, Wire, all your friends in the crew, everyone.

You knew Killer was right. There was something inside you that put up a barrier against fully feeling like part of the crew. It protected you in case one day they decided otherwise. Then you wouldn't feel as heartbroken. It had started to crumble not so long ago, but the deceptive words of Warthin had built part of it back up again. Something Killer said had caught your attention.

"Kid and you?"

In the silence that followed, you wish you had your vision back. Killer was probably so red he was purple.

"Uh, well." Killer paused in his discomfort. "Yeah. I was... gonna tell you. I wanted to tell you."

You smiled softly. "You didn't have to say it. You show it with everything you do. But... It's still nice to hear." There was a long pause. "That's your cue to say it." You put a hand behind your ear playfully.

"I guess I have no choice. I have to compete with your three other boyfriends."

"Huh? Three?"

Killer chuckled. "That's what you said in your sleep, when I was taking care of you."

"I wonder what I meant by that."

"Probably wishful thinking. I think Wire and Heat would find it very amusing," Killer teased.

"I don't need eyes to kick your ass, Massacre Soldier."

Killer leaned down and nuzzled his face into your neck. "I love you, little breadcrumb." He kissed your cheek.

______________________________________________________________

Several hours later, you were writhing in pain. Kid took you to his cabin to keep you company while Killer attend to his own duties. They both thought it best not to leave you alone with your thoughts, and for that you were grateful. Kid sat at the desk in his room and was working on some schematics or maybe charting. You couldn't tell, but you could hear the sound of his pencil furiously working. During this, Kid kept asking if you were ok and you kept replying that you were fine, but your clipped tone suggested otherwise. There was no more pain medication, not even the weak stuff. It had been used on you when you were unconscious. Kid didn't like watching you toss and turn, switching from fetal position one direction to the other, trying to get comfortable.

"Are you sure I can't get you-"

You half growled. "Get me heat and some fucking chocolate if it will make you shut up."

All the years that you had gone without menstruating seemed to catch up at once, hitting you with every missed cramp and migraine, plus interest. Between the cramping and your lower back aching, it felt like someone was spearing you through the middle. You could feel Kid's worry seeping into you from across the room and it annoyed you. This was nothing compared to what you had endured, and yet it knocked you flat on your back. You couldn't fight it with fists. If you had full use of your devil fruit, you could end it. Maybe tomorrow would be the day. You knew you shouldn't snap at Kid and you were guilty about it. The pain of the migraine you were now experiencing and the cramps squeezing the life out of you interfered with your ability to be nice. If Kid wanted to help so badly, then so be it. He could get you a warm pack and one of your cravings.

A few minutes later, Kid returned. "Alright, lass. I brought Heat and I didn't know what kind of chocolate ya wanted, so I brought all of it."

"What do you mean you brought Heat? I meant like a warm compress or something."

"Oh. Heat, ya can lea-"

"No! He'll do." You rolled to make room on Kid's bed. "Come." You patted the vacancy.

Heat stiffly got in beside you, unsure of the situation. He hadn't seen much of you since you returned. In fact, the last he saw you, you were near-dead on a gurney in the infirmary. This was improvement. He still didn't want to hurt you by accident, or, more likely, get hurt by you. You were giving him such a mean look, especially for someone with no eyes.

"Hands." You demanded. When he didn't move fast enough, you repeated,"Hands!"

Heat hurriedly gave you both of his hands. You slapped one on your lower back, and the other on your lower stomach, making a sandwich of yourself. Finally, his higher than normal body temperature started to soothe your pains. He had to lay on his side to keep his hands in place. You groaned as your aches grew duller. Normally, Heat would have been very into you ordering him around. He was too intimidated to have horny thoughts. Nor was it the right time to. When your breathing slowed and it seemed as if you were asleep. Heat thought about getting up.

"Boss," Heat whispered, "I'm scared to move."

"You should be," you said, definitely not asleep.

Kid cackled from across the room.

"Keep it down! My fuckin head is killing me."

Kid choked his laugh back. "My bad, doll."

There was a subtle jiggle in his hands as Heat silently laughed at his captain getting scolded. You put your hands on top of his, pressing it harder into your gut.

"Make them hotter," you told Heat.

"I can't control my body temperature."

You grumbled your displeasure.

Later, as you started feeling better, you dismissed Heat so he could go do his actual tasks for the day. Killer brought you lunch, which you weren't hungry for because you had been snacking on chocolate all day. Killer was displeased that Kid let you eat that much. In Kid's defense, he couldn't say no to you. You looked so cute curled up snuggled in his sheets and he liked that you were dependent on him. During breaks between sketching, Kid would sit next to you and rub your back or offer to get you something. Even Wire dropped by to "see if Kid needed anything", but really he wanted to see how you were doing with his own eyes now that he heard you were bouncing back.

In the evening, Killer brought dinner to Kid's cabin for the three of you. Killer did the same thing as he had before after cutting everything up into bite-size pieces. He helped you with the first bites so that you knew where everything was in space. Then, you could do it without his aid. Killer had thought about bringing you soup in a mug so you didn't have to fiddle with utensils, but he knew you wouldn't like getting something different than everyone else because of your disabilities. Plus, it was better that you got some hearty food in you instead of broth. By tomorrow, you could probably use your devil fruit to heal yourself if you had enough energy.

After dinner, you asked if you could shower. You hadn't done anything to get dirty between the last one and now, but you thought the warm, moist heat would feel good. Your body and Mother Nature were still fighting you, but they had settled down to a tolerable level. Killer would not allow a shower, and certainly not an unsupervised one. They were being extreme in your opinion. It was sweet how much they cared though. And that was how you ended up in the bathtub with both Kid and Killer. The bath was safer since you had to sit, and both of them had to clean off, so it made sense to join you. When you were done cleaning yourself, you sat in front of Killer so he could braid your hair again. You liked how it stayed out of your face and you knew that Killer was a little bit of a perfectionist, so they definitely looked good.

"So does this mean ya can get pregnant now?"

"Kid!" Killer scolded him.

"What?! I'm jus curious."

"My eyes would be rolling, if I had any. Just so you know." You sighed. "Yeah I guess so."

Kid made a noise of understanding.

"What? Nothing else?"

Killer pulled you into his lap when he was finished braiding your hair. "We'll be more careful in the future. That's all."

"Actually..." You paused, unsure how to proceed. "I was going to use my devil fruit to reverse the healing I did. I don't want to deal with this every month and I'm sure you don't either. And the chance of having a baby..." You shook your head. There was a silence that you didn't know how to interpret without being able to see either of their faces. It was making you nervous. "Is that... okay? Or.... is that something you... might want?" You choked the words out, feeling awkward even saying them. Being a mother and having a family were never items on your radar. Yet, your thoughts on the matter might be swayed if that was something that either of them wanted. They had done a lot for you lately, more than you thought they ever would.

"Doll, that's not for either of us ta decide."

Killer wrapped his arms around you in agreement.

"I can...always reverse that, too. If you change your mind." You shrugged.

"Stop yer worryin about what we want." Kid flicked water at you.

"Do what you want," Killer added.

The next day was pretty much the same. You felt like shit when you woke up, but as the day went on, you gradually felt better. And at the end of the day, you were able to fully heal the rest of your chest. You didn't know what would happen if you reverted your uterus to its scarred state before you were done with your period, so you left it alone for the time being. The entire day Kid and Killer periodically switched off checking on you, offering cuddles, idle chat, food, whatever you wanted. It was unlike anything you had experienced before and something you definitely hadn't expected from them, more so Kid. He really did have a soft side, if you were lucky enough to see it.

That night you were sandwiched between the two of them, as you were most nights. You liked to tuck yourself under Kid's stump and lay on his chest while Killer spooned you. That was exactly how you were positioned now. The pillowy-ness of Kid's chest rivaled your own. Killer refused to answer whose chest he preferred to lay on because he knew whatever he said would start a fight. Killer's hand was draped over you, rubbing your lower stomach, which still had echoing cramps. Kid ran his hand over your braid and gave it a playful tug.

"I like these."

"Mhm," you replied sleepily.

"I'm pretty close to figurin out how to replace yer eye."

"Are you?"

"Ya might ferget how handsome I am if I don't finish it soon."

Kid was only joking. How could he know that was a very real fear you had been struggling with? Tears formed at the corners of where your eyelids met and dripped down your face onto Kid. You tried to sniff them back before he could see, yet it only made you cry harder.

"Hah!? What'd I say?! What's wrong?"

"What if I do forget?" You sniffed. "W-when he took my eye... he said he's the last thing I'll ever remember. And I don't want him to be right."

"He won't be. Don't think that for a second." Kid's anger flared. The only thing stopping him from going to the brig and beating that man to death was the fact that you would be mad that you didn't get to do it yourself.

"We're not going to let that happen," Killer spoke from behind you. Killer felt guilt prick at his mind. Maybe he should have told you about your eye. He felt like he was doing the right thing. Now, he wasn't so sure.

Kid brushed the tears from your face. "Don't do that. Yer so ugly when ya cry." Kid said it on purpose. He knew it would make you laugh to say something mean instead of what a normal person might say. It was part of his charm.

"Kid!" Killer protested.

You started to half-laugh half-cry. Kid was so stupid. But it was comforting in a way that only you would understand. How did you deserve to have not one, but two people that cared for you so deeply? They had helped you so much over the past few days, not to mention the effort they put in to rescue you. Somehow, the past two days meant more to you. Any captain worth anything would rescue one of his crew. Only a captain that loved you would run and jump to hug you when he saw that you were awake, or bring you his own officer as a personal heating pad. And Killer, how two days in a row he brought you coffee and described the sunrise for you, so you could still participate in your special routine, one that you thought would be over forever. You started crying again.

"What now!? I didn't say anything!"

"No one.. has ever been... this kind to me." You said between sobs.

"Ya don't have to be a crybaby about it."

"You can be a crybaby with me," Killer rolled on his back and patted his chest.

You started to roll to lay on him instead, but Kid trapped you against him.

"No, no. Stay. I like yer ugly crybaby face."

Killer returned to his place spooning you and kissed behind your ear. "That's what people do when they love you."

"Get used to it, princess. Can't have ya bawling yer eyes out every time we do somethin nice."

Tag List: @bbnbhm @nocturnalrorobin

#this chapter is a tad self serving lol #probably my new favorite chappie #apologies for all the comfort #next chap will have some light mauling and maiming #who am I kidding it will have many satisfying deaths :3 #one piece #marooned #eustass kid #massacre soldier killer #x reader #eustass kid x reader #massacre soldier killer x reader

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btsficsandsuch · 1 year ago

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Hi! Can you write about Jungkook having to take care of his pregnant wife, as she has some difficulties in her pregnancy. Jk is just really concerned and gentle with her, wanting to grant her every wish, he also babies her, because he considers her really fragile. It would make me really happy 💜💜

Hope you like this!

Perfect Little Family

“Hey it’s going to be okay. We will get through this.”, your husband Jungkook spoke as he reached over taking your hand in his. You didn’t have the words to respond. You felt bad because you knew Jungkook was terrified but he was doing his best to put on a brave face for you. Being 8 months pregnant was terrifying in itself but now with the news that there may be complications, you feel completely petrified and unsure of what to do. Thankfully the doctor walked in to finally give some answers.

“Okay Y/N. After running some tests we’re going to diagnose you with preeclampsia. I know that sounds scary but you’re in good hands. We just want to be able to keep your little girl inside of you as long as we can but the health and safety of both of you is our first priority. I’m going to give you a prescription to help manage your blood pressure. Getting rest is also recommended. I also want to see you twice a week until you’re ready to deliver. Our goal is to get you to 37 weeks at minimum but we’ll take it day by day.” All you could do is nod. There was so much information being thrown at you and not what you wanted to hear. Thankfully Jungkook was there to ask all the questions. You could hear him asking about your diet, exercising, stress management. It was like he came prepared with a list of questions and he was closely listening to the doctors answers making lots of mental notes. You’d never been happier to have him with you than within that moment.

The ride home from the doctors appointment was silent on your end. Jungkook did his best to try and take your mind off of things. You knew he was desperate when he gave you an exaggerated opera performance of the newest Taylor Swift song that was playing on the radio but when he didn’t even get a smile from you he knew what you needed instead. He reached over grabbing your left hand that you had tucked into the pocket of your (his) hoodie giving it a squeeze, “Y/N, I know this is scary and we didn’t plan it to be this way but I know it’s going to work out. You have one of the best doctors in Seoul who happens to specialize in this condition. I’m going to be here every step of the way. We’ll get through this.” “I know Kookie. Thank you for being here with me.”, you manage to whisper. You felt terrible for essentially ignoring him the last couple hours when he’s done nothing but try and comfort you.

Once home you immediately make your way to the kitchen realizing just how hungry you are but before you can even reach for a pan Jungkook wraps his arms around you gently pulling you away from the stove. “Go lay down Y/N. I’ll make you something to eat. You need to rest, remember?”, he says before giving your neck a kiss. “Kookie I can manage making myself a grilled cheese.”, you smiled. He shook his head, “Nope, let’s go lay down. I’m not asking again.” “I like this new demanding Jungkook.”, you said as you watched his cheeks turn red. Not wanting to argue with him you went to your bedroom and put on your favorite movie before getting under the covers.

Not long afterwards Jungkook came walking in with a grilled cheese sandwich, a small side salad, and apple slices. “Thank you so much Kookie. This looks amazing.”, you said taking the tray from him. The rest of the day was spent cuddling in bed and relaxing trying to let the stress from earlier go.

The next few weeks were hectic to say the least. Two doctors appointments a week took a toll on you. Jungkook barely left your sided. He cooked all your meals and brought them to you in bed except the one time he made soup and was worried you’d spill it on yourself in the bed so you got to come sit at the kitchen table but only after he carried you there. He was adamant that he had to be at all the appointments, even missing out on a few important meetings though you begged him to go to work and that you’d be okay with your mom taking you but he refused. You were currently getting ready to take a shower that he insisted on being in the bathroom for. As you were removing your clothes you looked over at your husband sitting on the edge of the bathtub staring at you with a smile. “Are you sure you didn’t want to be in here just so you could see me naked?”, you chuckled. “I want to be in here to make sure you don’t slip or get too tired from standing so long or what if you drop your shampoo bottle and can’t pick it up? You being naked is just a bonus.”, he smirked.

The shower was much needed and you felt relaxed and ready for sleep. Even though you spend much of your day in bed you didn’t get much actual sleep. The two of you were laying in bed together when you looked over and noticed Jungkook was still awake. “Hey you okay?”, you asked. He nodded, “Yeah just thinking. You’re at 37 weeks tomorrow and you have an appointment. What if the doctor says it’s time?” You were a little taken back because the last few weeks he had been your rock. “Then we’ll take it hour by hour just like we’ve been doing day by day. As long as I have you with me then we’ll get through this.”, you said squeezing his hand reassuringly.

At some point you must’ve drifted off because you were woken up when you heard Jungkook softly speaking. You thought maybe he was having a dream but then you realized he had his head resting just below your chest while he was rubbing gentle circles on your bump. You slowed your breathing so you could try and hear what he was saying. “Hey baby girl, it’s your dad. We have to be quiet because mommy is sleeping. I know we haven’t talked in a while but things have been so crazy lately. You’re really giving us quite a scare right now. It’s not your fault though. The doctor said it can happen to anyone. I tried to do everything I could to make it easier for her but I still feel like I’m not doing enough. I’m trying my hardest to be brave for mommy but the truth is I’m scared too. What if something happens to either of you? I don’t know what I’d do. Your mom has an appointment tomorrow and they might decide that we get to meet you early. I’m really excited for that and I know your mom is ready to get you out but we’re both nervous so be easy on us tomorrow, especially your mom. I love you more than I will ever be able to tell you. Sleep well baby girl.”, he finished with a soft kiss to your bump.

You felt him start to stir and not wanting him to know you were listening you quickly closed your eyes pretending to be asleep but you could feel your heart filling with love at the man sleeping next to you. The next day the two of you went to your appointment, hospital bag included just incase.

After a small wait the doctor finally came in and shook both of your hands. “Well Mr. and Mrs. Jeon, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you safely made it to 37 weeks which is what we were hoping for. The bad news is that the tests we ran today show that your preeclampsia is worsening so I am going to recommend that we admit you to labor and delivery immediately. We will bring you a wheelchair and one of the nurses will take you up to your room.” The doctor gave a quick smile before heading out the door and before the door was even fully closed you released the tears you were holding in. Jungkook immediately noticed and began wiping at them with his thumbs, “It’s going to be okay Y/N. The hospital staff is going to take good care of both of you and I’m going to be here every step of the way. Just think, this time tomorrow we could be holding our daughter in our arms.” You smiled and leaned up for a kiss. Again he was putting on a brave face for you when you were falling apart.

The next several hours went by in a blur. Your beautiful daughter was born at 4:55am and was happy and healthy. “She’s beautiful. She looks just like her dad.”, you said looking up at Jungkook who had tears in his eyes as he looked down at the baby resting on your chest. “She’s just as gorgeous as her mom.”, he said wiping away the tears while looking at his perfect and healthy little family.

#bts fanfic #bts #bts x reader #jungkook imagine #jungkook fluff #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts fluff #bts imagines

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strayrumia · 9 months ago

Text

Road to Relationship (Ch. 3)

lee know x fem!reader

Synopsis: [Y/N] and Minho have been best friends since childhood. The two have never talked about the possibility of a romantic relationship between them, but then again, why risk losing a friendship? As they continue their college years, [Y/N] starts to take interests in the guys around her. Unbeknownst to [Y/n], her best friend may actually take that risk the more she goes after guys who don't really deserve her. - or - [Y/N] starts to crush on other guys, but Minho doesn't like the idea of other guys being beside her romantically but him.

Follow these best friends as they navigate their feelings for one another!

Genre(s): fluff, best friends to lovers, angst, love triangles Other tags: jealous/possessive minho, bts side story, fake texts au, semi-social media au + written Content Warning(s): swearing, suggestive themes, mention(s) of forgetting to eat/take care of yourself -> will be updated every chapter!

You stood nervously outside of the AYCE restaurant that Chan had told you about. Although he gave you that suggestion a few days ago that you should do a group hangout with Jungkook and your own respective friends to make things more comfortable for you, you decided last minute that it'd be best to keep this a small session just between you two. You didn't want to act as if you were both friends right away so you initiated a lunch between you two which, to your luck, Jungkook had agreed to!

You dressed pretty but casual and wore light make-up. After all, as much as you wanted to look nice for him, you didn't want to scare him away and go all out on this one hangout. You looked over the menu of the restaurant when you heard a masculine voice call your name, prompting you to turn to the source.

There he is, Jeon Jungkook, in all his handsome glory.

Although he dressed in a simple black graphic hoodie, ripped jeans, and some branded shoes, had his hair slightly parted, he still looked as good as ever. It was hard not to stare at such an attractive man, but you made sure your gaze didn't linger for long.

After quick small talk, you both entered the restaurant and eventually sat at your table, letting the server prepare your table with side dishes. You were able to converse with Jungkook as you ordered and ate, and ultimately, it felt as if it was a normal, natural hangout. 'Things are going pretty well so far!' You thought happily to yourself as you bit into a freshly cooked piece of brisket.

"So, [Y/N], the project... do you really believe that it's better to date an acquaintance over your best friend?" The question itself was so unexpected, it made you nearly choke on the meat you were in the process of chewing.

Jungkook must've noticed your subtle reaction because he immediately waved his hand in front of him apologetically. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it in a bad way. If you believe that, that's okay! I was just curious because the way you defended your piece that day was amazing. It felt as if you experienced something that encouraged the side is all... b-but you don't have to answer if it's too uncomfortable for you!"

You thought back to that day where you both had the debate. You remembered how much you wanted to win the debate, but at the end, you reflected more than anything from the points Jungkook had countered with.

"You'd be with someone you've known your whole life, the one who knows you well enough that they wouldn't betray your trust."

"Oh, but you mentioned that your best friend is essentially your other half. The idea is still likely, is it not?"

"Then the only things you're worried about are the fears of losing your close friend due to romantic interest and rejection."

"Well, I had what I thought was a relationship a little while ago. It was with someone who I used to consider really close to me. To spare you the details, they were someone who didn't treat me as well as I thought I did... and now we're no longer friends." You replied, unfortunately remembering the person you were with. You quickly looked up to him with an uneasy smile as you continued. "Don't worry about me, Jungkook! Honestly, it was for the best we're no longer together nor are we friends. After all, that person was a walking red flag! Haha..."

Jungkook listened silently and attentively as he watched you with a worried expression. "Anyway, I don't miss the person as much as I used to back then. If anything, I just think of it sadly because of the pain I went through, but now I know what I should've been looking for right?"

"Someone who you don't know so you don't have to feel attached?" he answered immediately. You sadly looked at him with a smile and nodded.

"Yes. Why should I try for someone close to me ever again? That person was a close friend of mine who I eventually caught feelings for. I don't want to feel that again - no, I don't want to risk it again. I don't want to take the chance of getting with a friend just to lose them all over again. I don't think I can take that risk..."

You thought about your close friends, especially the ones you've turned to as of lately.

Chan's a great friend as always and you're more than open to ever being in a relationship with him, but unfortunately as much as he would be someone you would trust, you aren't attracted to him. You can't deny that he is an attractive and kind man but you also just don't have the romantic feelings for him. He's been a big brother to you for as long as you can remember. Speaking of Chan, you usually spent time with him alongside Minho and your two other mutuals. Felix was definitely a sweetie and you've definitely thought about him in that way before, but you've always saw him gamed with him that you just enjoyed your mutual bonding with a gaming buddy. Minho and -

"Thank you for opening up to me, [Y/n]. I know doing that must be really hard to do, especially since we're not really that close - actually, that might've been easier if you saw me as a stranger, heh. What you're feeling is completely valid and I don't blame you for thinking that way. You must've been through a lot to get to where you are."

Jeon Jungkook, man. You just can't help how much you admire this man. How can such a being be real? Despite being complete strangers even though you've had mutual classes together, he never made you feel judged or anything. He's definitely a kind guy, inside and out.

"But you know, life is pretty short, but we're also really young. That experience you've had must've been a really bad one, but the world is big. Life itself has a lot of risks, it's just up to you to take them or even fight for what you want." He's right. When your situationship ended, you didn't want to put up a fight, but nor did they even try. You had already learned that there was no point in trying for someone who wouldn't give you the same effort back. You knew it, you would only fight for someone who would fight for you back, unlike that partner. "Plus, there's definitely someone out there who'll understand you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Who knows? Maybe you've already met them and you just don't know it."

"I don't know about that. Besides... what if you're ever interested in pursuing someone that might not be entirely a stranger? Like you've seen them enough to know their name and face, but now it's just up to you to take the chance and learn who they really are. " You said that with the intention to counter his statement, but when the words left your mouth, you immediately remembered the situation you're in. You're eating KBBQ with your groupmate- your crush. The very person you were nervous about having this lunch with. 'Wow, this guy really is good...' He was able to make conversations with you so naturally that you forgot you were trying to get to know him for your group project.

"I don't think I'd want to get with a stranger. It's better for me to get to know someone. Once we're friends and become closer, then I'll be able to tell what kind of person they are. That's why for me, I'd rather go for someone who's already within my circle of friends."

Feeling your chances get broken down was an understatement. It took you a lot of courage to even ask out the guy to this lunch, but knowing you have to become closer friends with him to even become a potential option to date? You were hoping to just be lucky with a few more dates before he might have a similar spark with you, but to know that you as an acquaintance has no chance until you worked for it? Honestly, it felt like a challenge - one you weren't sure you wanted to take, but Jungkook was someone you thought might be an exception. After all, it felt as if the time was right when you've learned Jungkook was in your same class again. If you couldn't befriend him the first time, then maybe this is the time to do so now.

Before you could respond to his answer, you got a text from your roommate. You were lucky to have a good friend as a roommate because you were able to save the troubles from the horror stories you've heard about when finding roommates for an apartment. You had earlier asked her if she can pick you up once your lunch was over since you had decided to take public transportation to get to the restaurant in order to save money and gas. Unfortunately in this case, she had just texted you that she was unable to pick you up as something came up in her extracurricular.

You looked up at Jungkook who resumed eating the last of his portions and shook your head mentally. There was no way you were going to ask him to give you a ride home. You would feel bad for having him to do so, but you also did not want this to be the way to leave things off with him on your first ever hangout.

The only one who was free today that you could recall was Minho. With that, you immediately shot him a text.

As you two finished your round of meat, you were able to divert the conversation so that you got to learn a bit more about Jungkook. You learned that he was currently a Graphic Design major, but was looking into doing architecture more despite his love for drawing. He was also doing sports on the side as a hobby. He talked about his hobbies with so much love and passion, you couldn't stop your cheeks from hurting from how much it made you happy to hear him gush.

Eventually the two of you had finished eating, split the bill and had just exited the restaurant when you saw Minho standing outside his car, leaning against it while he scrolled through his phone waiting for you. You also couldn't help but notice how many people walked by and often stopped and stared at him. It made something in you churn a little inside, but it quickly went away when Minho looked up and saw you, a smile replaced his handsome yet intimidating expression.

"Minho! Thanks for coming to get me! I appreciate you so much-" You exclaimed, immediately running towards him with your arms out so that you can embrace your best friend in gratitude. He returned your embrace while patting your head gently.

"Yeah, yeah, it's fine. At least you're safe with me now. Let's go now." he said, gently separating you two as he gestured to the car.

You nodded in return as you exchanged 'thank you's' and 'goodbyes' to Jungkook, when you paused and remembered your earlier conversation with him. His feelings towards being comfortable in his own circle of friends was just as valid as yours, but for some reason the challenge of pursuing him like that left you unsure yet you couldn't exactly pinpoint why. One thing for sure is that you listened to his words of advice to you very clearly and you wanted to return some back to him.

"Maybe just as you're telling me to be more open to the people around me, maybe I want to tell you to be more open to the strangers or acquaintances you come across."

Jungkook blinked, taken aback, and chuckled in response as he regained his composure. "Is this for the project or for me, [Y/n]?"

"Probably both, but I'll leave that up to your imagination." You said with a playful grin as you got into Minho's car. You got settled in his passenger seat and buckled up when you looked out the window and noticed the two were exchanging a conversation of their own. You smiled unknowingly as you were unable to hear what they were saying but happy to know that Minho was able to see his fellow club member and let them have their own talk for a bit. You went on your phone until Minho got back into the driver seat, got settled, and started to drive.

Before he could even say a word, you immediately told him how the lunch went and the conversations you've had that you could remember, but temporarily omitted the talk you've had about your situationship to Jungkook and his reply in return. You felt that you could tell him about it at a later time, but he should hear the happier, fun things of the lunch.

"Oh! I forgot you guys already knew each other from the beginning, I'm sorry you guys weren't able to chat longer earlier." You recalled the information you learned from Jungkook and felt guilt upon not bringing up Minho at all to him. You knew Minho and Jungkook knew each other, yet you were unable to mention your relationship to Minho so that you could have a mutual conversation about him. He was essentially the bridge between you two!

"It's fine, [Y/n], we see each other all the time because of Dance Club. Don't worry. Besides," he replied, a small smile, yet questioningly cocky, turning his lips. "I told him about all he needed to know."

The expression made you confused but you shrugged it off, assuming he probably was playfully tricking him about something related to Dance Club. You didn't think about it long as he started a new topic with you that immediately took your attention, leaving your initial confusion forgotten.

To be continued...

<- Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 (You are Here) | Chapter 4 ->

Profiles | Masterlist | Prologue

TAGLIST: nappynapnaps jisuperboard kaiyaba navyyyyyys-dumb chaosbell rylea08 thing89

#stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #lee know scenarios #lee know x reader #kpop fanfic #stray kids fake text #lee know fake texts #skz au

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milkoomi · 1 month ago

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I'm following your blog for 1 month, it's very pretty. If you could help me with confidence related any info and also my height is very short, everyone is In the class to very tall.I feel to much insecure, I wanna be an entrepreneur, I feel I'm not doing enough .

hi darling!! thank you so much for following me on here and showing my blog support! 🤍

as for your request, i think it’s important to remember 3 very important things when it comes to having confidence:

1. negative self-talk is an absolute NO

i’ve talked about this in a few other posts, but let me just reiterate this! talking down on yourself allows two things to happen: 1. you’ll allow that same negative/self-deprecating words be accessible for others to use on you and 2. you’ll only continue to bring yourself down & get further and further away from finding true confidence.

also, consider this: think about the hurtful things you say to yourself, would you say those things to someone you love? no, right? so why would you say them to yourself? your loved ones would want you to lift yourself up just as you would lift them up, so always show yourself the same love and kindness as you would to a friend!

learn to say “thank you”! when someone gives you a compliment, don’t try to shut it down with “oh, no i don’t look that great today” or “ah, you don’t mean that”. accept the compliments, even if you force yourself to say thank you you’ll eventually start believing in those compliments yourself!

2. “never compare your behind the scenes with someone else’s highlights”

this was a quote i found through a youtube video i watched on confidence! i believe way too many of us focus so much on what we see on social media and, without even giving it a second thought, we start comparing our own lives to what everyone else is highlighting on their accounts. 9 times out of 10, people are never going to show what their real life is like. they’re always going to show the best parts of their lives, and we as individuals only see the good parts of everyone else’s lives while we know the bad parts that are going on in our lives. understand that everyone has their own struggles, but we just might not see it right then and there.

everyone lives their lives much differently, and that’s okay! just because you see people moving faster in their own life doesn’t mean you’re behind or that you have to catch up. it’s your life! you can go at whatever pace you feel most comfortable! what other people are doing in their own lives shouldn’t be any kind of priority in your own life. focus on you and your own path.

3. you are enough

this kind of ties in with the last two points, but reminding and affirming yourself that you are enough will truly do wonders in building your confidence. if you need that reminder from someone else, then allow me to be that person! you are enough. your efforts have been noticed, your beauty is truly unmatched, and you will always be more than enough for yourself and for others.

i believe everyone was put on this earth to provide some kind of purpose, and we may not know what that purpose is exactly just yet, but we have a purpose in our lives. understanding and knowing just that bit of information will motivate you to achieve your dreams and reach that finish line of success! and you will get there, but you have to remind yourself of your worth!

reflect on yourself

i’m really big on journaling here on this blog, and i believe journaling can help people so much in many aspects of their life. i want you to reflect on yourself!

journaling prompts:

write down 3 things you’ve accomplished (whether in the past week, month, or year) and, essentially, write yourself a letter congratulating yourself!

what are 3 qualities about yourself that you take pride in? why?

write a love letter to yourself! talk about physical features you love or characteristics about yourself that make you happy!

think about what your loved ones would say to you, write down 5 of things and write them as affirmations (ex: “i am beautiful”, “i am capable and worthy of success”, “i have a delightful and joyful energy”)

some of my posts i’d recommend:

the art of self-confidence

finding & knowing your worth

final notes —

i wasn’t always a confident person, and there are still days where i struggle finding that confidence i need. but if there’s anything i’ve learned to overcome my own insecurities, it’s that i am the only version of myself there is. i have my own set of accomplishments and i have my own special set of unique characteristics no one else has. you have to learn those things too! there’s no one else like you, no one else who works as hard as you do, no one else who achieves the things you do; there’s only one version of you and that is so, so unbelievably special!

with lots of love, faustina 🌷

#ask tina!!#self confidence #self confidence tips #self love #self love tips #it girl #it girl tips #that girl #becoming that girl #that girl energy #girlblogger #girlblogging #personal growth #personal growth tips #self improvement #self improvement tips #building confidence

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 years ago

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PSA on sharing others' twst merch pictures + jp fandom etiquette

Okay guys, it’s time to sit down and have a serious talk for a second 😣

With the recent deliveries of 2023 Valentine Gifts to Japanese fans, I noticed that many had censored the text (whereas in previous years, it was much easier to locate uncensored letters). At the same time, I've also noticed many international fans reposting pictures (which do show the uncensored text) taken from Japanese fans' accounts to sort of "live react" or scream about the contents (rather than sharing and/or liking the original post they clearly took the images from).

Admittedly, this is an issue that moreso plagues TWST Twitter than TWST Tumblr, but I know that there are fans that frequent both platforms and are unaware of this issue. Here in this post, I'm going to talk about why spreading someone else's merch pictures looks bad for us (in the international TWST fandom), why you shouldn't do it, and what you can do instead.

First thing's first, let's think of it this way: this situation is similar to art/writing/translation theft. One can make the argument that technically since the work being shared around is "not original/not made by the OP" then it is okay to just take it and spread it. That's not the problem here; the problem is that someone else spent their hard-earned money to obtain this item, and some OPs even go out of their way to make elaborate set-ups to take pictures of their merchandise. The act of taking something that isn't yours but still posting it without crediting the OP (and thus taking the credit for yourself, even if not explicitly claimed to be "yours") still pervades. If you want to think of it another way, it’s like not citing your sources properly in an essay. What makes this behavior worse is that it's literally SO easy to just retweet and/or like the original post. But no, instead people are actively making the decision to take their photos without so much as linking back to the OP. What purpose does that serve, especially when it's considerably more effort than liking/retweeting? Not to mention the harm it does for the already shaky relations between Japanese and international fans 💦 I already mentioned before that the number of uncensored Valentine Gifts has gone WAY down in 2023, and I'd wager that this is, in part, due to international fans often engaging in this aforementioned "picture theft". It is seen as something done in poor taste, but it is not often overtly spoken about due to the language barrier and/or Japanese fans not being as outspoken as, say, western fans are. Japanese fans are sharing pictures of their merch to express their excitement and share the love of their favorite character(s) with others. It feels like a violation of those positive feelings to have someone else come along, snatch up the picture they lovingly took, and pass if off as essentially their own without permission or even acknowledging that the OP exists. We also need to consider the possibility that some Japanese fans may be uncomfortable with their pictures being spread around because it unintentionally spoils others. Their excitement should not impact others' experiences, so when this is done outside of their own control it can make them feel helpless. They are NOT posting these very personal pictures for clout, but to spread their joy to their friends and followers. That's why so many Japanese fans now feel discouraged from sharing something they love so much with fellow fans--because their boundaries and intentions are not being respected. We want to see the Valentine Gifts and other awesome pictures of TWST merch in the future? Then we need to give our fellow fans the courtesy they deserve. We should NOT act entitled to or feel owed for what is paid content that other people purchased. This should be a GIVEN act of basic human decency. Furthermore, PLEASE remember that in continuing to take pictures that don't belong to you, you're only going to make it harder for yourself to all to see Valentine Gifts moving forward (save for buying all 28 letters yourself, or hunting down the 28 individually on a platform now scarce of the uncensored versions). The OPs’ feelings are obviously much more important than international fans not getting their fix of merch pics, but if that’s how the situation needs to be reframed to make people reconsider their actions, then reframe it we shall. Merch picture theft, combined with international fans misusing the JP fandom's tagging system to increase visibility of their posts (even when the content is not relevant), acting entitled to translations of official and fan content, and instances of international fans acting aggressively and harassing Japanese fans has created an environment of distrust. It's only going to get worse if we can't draw a line in the sand here and now.

The intention in calling attention to this issue is NOT to gatekeep Japanese merch from an international audience. You have MANY options available to you where you can engage with OP’s post, still see and enjoy the content, AND be polite about it.

What's NOT okay to do?:

Taking OP's picture and reposting it with no credit.

Taking OP's picture and editing it (filters, drawing over it, etc.) before reposting.

Asking OP to uncensor the image(s).

Contentious to do:

Quote retweet! (Japanese fans are generally iffy with internet strangers in their mentions. This may vary from OP to OP.)

Commenting on OP's post! (Like QRTing, the Japanese fandom generally does not like comments unless they come from mutuals/people they are familiar with. Again, this may vary from OP to OP. It’s best to preface comments with an “excuse me”, “I’m not a mutual but”, or something along those lines to be polite.)

Linking or crediting the OP in a thread, especially if it is the second tweet or beyond (because not everyone will read the entire thread, and therefore they may miss the credit). If you’re going to credit OP in a thread, do it in the initial tweet or as soon as possible in your own post.

Asking for and getting OP's permission to share their picture in a public space. (I would advise against this one due to potential language barriers. This method may also put OP on the spot to give a certain reply.)

So... what IS okay to do?:

Liking OP's post!

Retweeting (or whatever the equivalent of sharing is) the OP's post!

Sharing OP's post or images in private spaces (ie DMs, among friends/group chats, etc.)

Sharing only the TEXT of merch items in public.

Sharing your OWN pictures.

Sharing your reactions to merch in your own post (without any pictures).

Sharing/referencing a database created by the OP (same person who took all the pictures in the database) for the sole intention of being shared.

Asking to see merch images taken by your friends.

I did my best to research this situation and to give appropriate advice on it, but please let me know if I flubbed up somewhere 💦

Anyway!! I hope that you found this post enlightening and that you take its message to heart 🙇‍♀️ Please, let's all try to be more mindful of how we share things that we're excited about in this fandom!! We can still have fun and scream about our favorite characters without souring the experience for other fans!!

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst merch #twisted wonderland merch #disney twisted wonderland #twst en #twisted wonderland en #twst valentine #twisted wonderland valentine #notes from the writing raven #advice #twst valentines #twisted wonderland valentines #twst valentine gift #twisted wonderland valentine gift #twst valentines day letters #twisted wonderland valentines day letters

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feral-sylki · 1 year ago

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“Her name was Sylvie”

“Because we’re the same”

“See? We’re both selfish”

These three quotes have attached themselves to my brain and won’t let go and so I’m gonna chatter about them because I have so many thoughts and look. I am quite aware there is a focus on Sylvie with these. I can’t help it, she’s my favourite, her tragic backstory, insane grin and absolute commitment to her beliefs have captivated me

Okay so first one: “Her name was Sylvie.” Loki, with the very real possibility she’s been killed, holding the line for her. The identity she forged for herself, the escapism and the rebellion and the individuality that’s so important to her, he not only respects, but holds the line for her. You fell for yourself; no, because she isn’t me, she’s Sylvie. He cares for her, he fell for Sylvie, the fierce woman who teases him and challenges him and fights for life with everything she’s got. And he does reach Mobius. Mobius plays it off mockingly during the interrogation “is that with an ie or just an i?” but he remembers it and he uses it. He says to Ravonna, “Why didn’t you let me interrogate Sylvie?” Like it’s so important to have someone who cares, someone in your corner. There’s so much packed into four words

“Because we’re the same.” The flip side of the individuality is the fact that they are variants of each other and that’s such a fascinating and important and beautiful part of the narrative. Sylvie violently establishes her individuality and separateness from the Loki conglomerate at the beginning, but she choses to reassure Loki that he can do it by using their sameness. Like seriously I cannot express how amazing that character development is there. She’s now so much more comfortable in her identity because of him. Because of him, Loki, fresh off the sacred timeline, who was meant to “cause pain and suffering and death” only, he has helped her feel more comfortable in her own skin, by caring and just being himself. That’s awesome. And it’s also romantic as hell. Win win

“See? We’re both selfish.” Painful. Devastating. Beautiful. Harder to pin down why I like it so much because I haven’t had two years to chew on it yet but here we go let’s see. Ok so: it’s an extension of the we’re the same module, and even estranged from him, she’s still willing to accept what he and she share. There’s still care there; it isn’t what they had in season one, but it’s there all the same. She was horrified by the timeslipping and concerned for him, so, she takes him drinking. That’s my hedonistic girl. But the point being that she sees him in pain and is trying to care for him, in her way. So, we get there, conversation, and we get to the other thing that’s fascinating about it: at the time Sylvie owns the “you’re so selfish” when it’s thrown at her like “of course I’m selfish, I want a life, what’s wrong with wanting something?” which is amazing, because I really do love a character who is not only willing to admit to selfishness, but embraces it, owns it, takes pride in it, even. Like fuck yeah that’s my girl. But but but, and here’s the sticker: with this line “See? We’re both selfish.” we see that maybe it did get under her skin, the way that only he can really hurt her like this, precisely because of how much she cares for him, this vulnerability that she has with him, one of the few people who she’s taken down her walls before. But she also can see how low and rough the spot he’s in is right now and she cares about him and wants to help him, so it could be argued she’s using it like she used their sameness to reassure him last season. She says “we’re both selfish” in the same breath that she told him being selfish isn’t bad; so essentially: it’s ok, Loki, it’s okay to want things, we both wants things, it’s normal

So yeah, I’m completely normal about these characters this show and these quotes

#Loki series #loki #sylvie laufeydottir #okay so this was like a multi paragraph I love Sylvie post huh?#oh well I enjoyed writing it #sylki #pro sylvie #loki series positivity #I did think of the you can’t trust and I can’t be trusted but honestly that’s a whole other post

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sirlordevil · 8 months ago

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Hey, little post for people who know others who are struggling with self-harm. Here's some dos and do nots for supporting them.

DO NOT react to them opening up about it by telling them that if they do it, you'll do it too. Doing this just makes them lose trust in you, and they will likely not open up about it to you ever again. I cannot stress enough how fucked up this is to say to a person.

DO ask them if they're thinking about doing it now and / or are somewhere safe. You need to prioritize their current well-being. Remember, not only is self-harm a coping mechanism, it's an addiction to many. Saying, "Oh my gosh, that's awful, please stop. I really care about you." Isn't going to make them put it down. In fact, in some cases, it might make them want to do it more. It's not because they don't love you or anything its more so a mix of reverse psychology and unceasing self-loathing, numbness, anxiety, etc.

DO NOT wrist check them. This is invading personal boundaries, if not explicitly requested of you to do. Again, this can result in a loss of trust and build-up resentment towards you.

DO ask how they're doing or feeling and let them know they aren't a burden to you. Build an open space they can come to instead of forcing it all out of them.

DO NOT say something along the lines of "Why can't you just quit?" or "Think about how sad your family would be!" or "You should stop hurting yourself. It's bad for you." While the last one is true, statements like these put guilt on the person and not only that but might make them mad because you don't understand what it's like for them.

DO offer them alternatives and discuss with them why they feel the need to self-harm. One of the most well-known alternatives is snapping a rubber band on your wrist. Another one is holding an ice cube against yourself. One method I personally find great is working out a little until you get that ache feeling. Great way to get out internal frustration and physical activity is proven to make you happier.

DO NOT poke fun at them for it by calling them emo or something if the like. Unless they seem 100% okay with it and like actively encourage it because they find it funny, this is just messed up. I have nothing more to say on this except you will become part of the problem.

DO encourage them to have fun and find happiness in things they enjoy. If this person likes a certain show or video game, you'd be surprised by how much good it can do for someone's mental health to just be able to talk about it with someone or have someone who enjoys it as well. Sometimes, really liking something is the first step to liking yourself.

DO NOT talk over them about their own issues. You do not know them better than they know themselves. Shedding light or clarifying something for them is okay, but do not keep saying a certain thing is the root cause when they keep telling you it isn't.

DO be understanding whether they tell you about the root issue(s) or not. If they don't tell you, then don't take it personally. It's hard to open up about, and it's not exactly something a lot of people have the energy to share or the words to describe. Be patient with them and let them take their time.

As a general tip: Always ask if they want advice, a distraction, or want you to listen. It's essential to be on the same page if you really want to provide their needs.

For now, I can't think of any more. Feel free to add to what I have already, and I might add some more later.

#tw: sh #cw: sh #tw: sh mention #cw: sh mention #how to help someone struggling with sh #ooc post

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deathofpeaceofmiiind · 1 year ago

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high infidelity | nineteen

He said, "Let's get out of this town, drive out of the city, away from the crowds" I thought Heaven can't help me now. Nothing lasts forever, but this is gonna take me down

“This place is fucking wild.” I looked around after we landed in Las Vegas and I couldn’t get over how this place looked like Disneyland for adults. There was slot machines everywhere in the airport, there were people smoking wherever they wanted and people who looked like they started drinking at 6am. I thought the movies were over exaggerating but I was dead wrong. Noah and I got into our Uber and headed over to the hotel, the second we got in the car he reached for my hand interlocking our fingers together, as I admired the city around me. I looked over at him quickly, his hair was tucked behind a hat and he had a pair of black ray bans on, which happened to be my favourite pair of his. This man was too gorgeous for his own good.

“Sorry I have to drop and run…I’ll be back after soundcheck.” Noah said before running out the door. The door wasn’t even shut before he ran back quickly to kiss me and ran back out, making me chuckle. I opened the blinds, looking at the city in front of me, still not believing I was here. The idea of exploring this city alone didn’t sound thrilling so I sprawled over the bed and had a nap while I waited for Noah.

“Hey.” My eyes flickered opened and I saw Noah sitting beside me, gently rubbing my back.

“Hey, how did sound check go?” “It wasn’t too bad actually, I think the extra travelling is starting to get to me though.” I frowned a little bit. I felt guilty that he was doing all this travelling for me. It looked like it was effecting him more than he was leading on. He saw my sad expression and sent me an assuring smile. “Ellie, I’m fine.” “I know, I just feel guilty.” I replied, chewing on my bottom lip. Not that I didn’t enjoy getting to spend all this time with him, but if it was effecting his career it wasn’t worth it.

“I’m okay, I promise.” He said, kissing my shoulder. “I’m gonna take a nap, I think some of the guys were gonna head to the pool if you’re interested.” “The pool sounds like a great idea actually.” I got out of bed and fished for my swimsuit. It was a simple black one piece with cutouts on the side, I paired it with my black ripped denim shorts and leopard print slides. I turned around to say goodbye to Noah, but he was already asleep. I grabbed some essentials for the pool and headed out the door. I found a shaded area near the pool with some lounge chairs and laid down, letting the sun kiss my skin. It was so hot here, it was almost uncomfortable but my body was dying for some colour. “Hey stranger.” I looked up from my chair, the sun was blinding me so I had to shield my eyes to see who it was, it was Matt. I didn’t recognize him at first since he had his hair in a low bun and he was wearing sunglasses. His shorts exposed a vibrant leg sleeve I never noticed he had, it was quite impressive if you ask me. “Hey yourself.” I replied, gesturing him to sit beside me. He immediately took his shirt off and settled into the chair, exposing more of his tattoos, making me grip the chair a little tighter. I should just assume this whole group is covered in them, but I’m still taken by surprise. “Noah said he sounded okay during soundcheck, is that true?” “He sounded just fine. Honestly the venue has shit acoustics, I was struggling in there too.” “Is he always this hard on himself?” I asked Matt as I rolled onto my side so I could look over at him. “For as long as I can remember, but don’t take it to heart. He’s put everything into this band and if one thing goes wrong, he blames himself.” I chewed on my thumbnail, wondering why this was bothering me so much. “He would tell me if I’m getting in the way, right?” “God, you’re adorable.” Matt chuckles as he takes his sunglasses off to look at me, flashing me his gold flecked eyes. “I don’t think there’s anything you could do that would hinder him from doing his job. Noah is who he is, and there’s not much we can change.” “Okay.” I replied, still not quite convinced. I know it wasn’t Noah’s fault, it was my past that was starting to creep in. It got me thinking how I blamed myself for making Tyler act the way he did. I know Noah wasn’t anything like him, I had to constantly remind myself of that. “I know I just sat down but are you hungry at all?” I turned my attention back over to him, “Starving. I haven’t eaten since the plane.” We both got up, I put my shorts back on, he slid his shirt on and we headed over to the bar attached to our hotel. It had Mexican food, which was right up my alley. I texted Noah to see if he was awake and wanted to join us, but he never replied. I guess I had Matt’s company for now. It was a little awkward for me at first, since I only really saw him for the day in Seattle. I do remember how much he made me laugh and how I destroyed him at Uno so this shouldn’t be as bad as my anxiety is making it out to be. The server took our menus and as she left Matt sent me smirk, “I take you to a Mexican bar and you get fish tacos?” “First off, fuck you. Second, I live in the Pacific Northwest where we eat all kinds of seafood. I thought California was the same?” “I actually live in Texas.” “That explains it, get some culture Matthew.”

He just rolls his eyes at me as our drinks came to the table, I grabbed mine immediately and took a long sip, avoiding the longing stare he was giving me. Matt and I talked about everything and anything the entire time, we found out we were only three months apart, we talked about our high school days, and found out we liked the same bands. The conversation flowed smoothly and he made me laugh until my cheeks started to hurt. I was definitely wrong about him, I thought he was just a shit disturber but he was really sweet. He was starting to feel like someone I could confide him about any issues I was having, and it was nice to have another friend. After we were finished we parted ways and I headed back to the hotel room. The shower was going so Noah was definitely awake. I swear this man spends more time in the shower than anywhere else. At least he smelt good all the time. I was a little bit buzzed considering I drank three double tequila soda’s with Matt. I sat down to stop the spinning and thought about what I was going to wear tonight, I assumed no matter what I wore I was gonna sweat in it. “Hey, you’re back.”

I turned around, almost choking on my own spit at the sight of Noah. He had a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair was still wet, causing water beads to drip down his tattooed chest. “Yeah, I texted you but you must’ve been asleep still.” I replied as I looked for something to wear. I just grabbed a black corset top to go with the shorts I was already wearing with my black vans. “I just got up fifteen minutes ago actually…have a good afternoon with Matt?” My face burned a little, “Yeah it’s nice hang out with your friends and get to know them.”

“Good, I’m glad.” Noah smiled before heading back into the bathroom. I just smiled at him as I tried to shake this weird feeling I was having towards Matt. I kept telling myself it was nothing. What was going on with me?

#bad omens #fanfic #noah sebastian

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