#especially when im in pain
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Scrappiiiees i love kitchen :)
#witch hat tag#orufrey#sorry kind of obsessed about qifrey happy sniffling in kitchen. i draw him sad crying a lot but i think thats the only time we see tears#my head is so busy right now bc im playing edgeworth game and am obsessed with wrightworth atm talking & shyly romancing in my head#with the wish to depict it BUT MY HEADS TOO FULL OF ORUFREY TOO EVERY DAY!!! AND KITCHEN FAMILY LIFE!!!#and DA2 AS WELL bc i was trying to finish the third game before veilguard but i failed bc i miss my da2 man so much#TOO MUCH GAY LOVE IN M YHEAD!!!!#i do think qifrey cries sad tears as well but i think the effort is taken up by crying pain tears during headaches. Haha..#i too am a sniffler. especially about lovely things like witch hat kitchen and orufrey AND when ppl leave nice comments on fics <3 <3
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WIP Wednesday
I was tagged by @nuwanders last week after I made my wip post, so I'm using that tag this week instead!
I'm (much slower than I'd like) making progress on the Sotha Sil pmv. Right now I'm doing all the line art, which I'm just doing for the characters or foreground objects.
So have a made up mechanical do-dad I'm proud of and some Nerevars
Tagging @snowy-weather @thescrolls-haveforetold @caliblorn @snowy-weather @truth-01001001-liar (only if you want to, of course! no pressure!)
#idk what it is but every time i draw nerevar i find it impossible to clothe him#like i feel like he should either be shirtless or in armor. i cant picture him in casual clothes#mine#wip wednesday#mini vent ahead:#i think the period of time when my hand pain first devleoped and i tried resting them just destroyed my attention span#i used to be able to draw for like 7 hours straight with few social media interludes#but now not only can i physically not go that long anymore but i also get SO DISTRACTED i feel like one of those annoying ipad kids#so i make art so slowly. especially bigger projects like this where i inevitably lose a lot of steam as i go#so im kinda draggin myself through this now. like i want to see it done but im a lil tired of working on it#but when i take breaks on projects i tend to never finish them. i am cursed to work on one thing at a time lol
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I just want to say that I personally disagree with the claims that Stolas is a coercive rapist. You don't have to agree with me. I just want to share my perspective. Alright, here we go.
Let's start at Harvest Moon Festival: 'When this happens, it's not really something I fuss about...' and 'Well, I'm not a fan of someone I offered a job to about to off my easiest lengthy ticket to Earth behind my back.' Notice how Blitz says 'easiest lengthy ticket' here, not 'only ticket', and Blitz knows about Asmodean Crystals, as evidenced by Unhappy Campers where he forces someone to use it to create a portal to the living world, so the Grimoire was never the only option Blitz could've used to run I.M.P. Sure losing the grimoire would've disrupted business for a bit, but again, it was never Blitz's only option. It's also been confirmed in Ghostfuckers that I.M.P used to assassin jobs in Hell before Blitz got the Grimoire from Stolas, I.M.P was running fine without the Grimoire, if Blitz couldn't get his hands on the Grimoire or the Asmodeun Crystal he and his could always just run missions in Hell, so the coercion argument already falls flat there, but let's beat it up a bit further shall we?
Now let's look at Ozzies, at the ending of it Stolas never pressures or forces Blitz into having sex with him or quote 'We could talk, or… watch a movie, or… maybe cuddle?', Blitz turns Stolas down here, and Stolas never forces or pressures Blitz into doing said things with him, and you know what this also proves? It proves that Blitz has always the self-agency to tell Stolas 'no I don't want to fuck you', which also shows that Blitz actually wanted to have sex with Stolas, which we can prove by the text messages Stolas and Blitz had after Ozzie's.
The text messages at the end of Western Energy show that Stolas is actively giving Blitz the option to not fuck him, which also tells us that Blitz always had the option to tell Stolas no, and hell, we can see in the All 2 U song that Blitz turned down Stolas most likely asking Blitz to stay after the sex, proving even further Blitz always had the self-agency to tell Stolas no, which shows that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas.
And I'm not even counting everything about what happened in Full Moon episode. Blitz literally sings about how much he enjoys sex with Stolas, spends the whole day buying things to use on Stolas, begged for Stolas to keep the deal, said multiple times about how much the deal is something he enjoyed and wanted to keep, and told Loona and M&M about how Stolas never forced anything on him which lead to months without intimacy between them. Where is the coercion??? Simply, it's not there.
Now let's look at Apology Tour, Blitz wants the arrangement back, to fuck Stolas again. Which tells us something that the people peddling the bullshit 'Stolas is a rapist' argument entirely ignore, Blitz is the one unhappy with the arrangement ending, not Stolas, Blitz.
Also, Blitz has the Asmodeun Crystal by this point, he could've easily have just told Stolas to fuck off and leave if he was truly being coerced and raped by him, but he chooses to stay because at this point he thinks this gesture is a farewell gift from Stolas, and it's been made very clear that Blitz has strong feelings for Stolas by this point despite his self-hatred, that he doesn't want to lose Stolas, which also helps to further prove that Blitz wanted to have sex with Stolas out of his entire free will.
Blitz having sex with Stolas was a way for Blitz to be close to Stolas without having to be vulnerable, and when Stolas gets rid of the arrangement Blitz is scared because it would force Blitz to be vulnerable towards Stolas.
Is all of this really the behavior of a person who felt coerced into sex he didn't want to have? Because I think it's pretty clear that Blitz at no point felt coerced into having sex with Stolas, and the people that claim otherwise I have good grounds to believe aren't even watching the same show anymore.
i think i can sum up everything you said here, from my pov, in one sentence: "A part of Blitz craved Stolas' "affection" and "interest" in him because he had never experienced true love before (+ all the trauma in his past really fucked him up when it comes to opening up his heart and recieveing love and not pushing people away), and pretty much got hooked to the "relationship" despite Stolas' gaslighting, name calling and manipulative tendencies"
long story short, blitz fell in love with his abuser and is unable to break free. symbolically, he cant break the chains
#also i can never ignore the pain in blitz's voice when he begged stolas not to take the book away from him#dude had to feed and house himself and his employees somehow#maybe it wasnt the only way#but it was the easiest option#especially because he has three people under his care#killing people on earth earned them more $ than being an assasin in hell im positive#especially when you remember that imps and hellhounds are lower class#anti helluva boss#fuck stolas#anti stolas#anti stolitz#fuck vivziepop#helluva boss critical#anti vivziepop#helluva critical#stolas critical
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even though i know the leverage team gets back together as soon as season 2 starts and we barely see any time of them being apart, it makes me unreasonably upset that they not only spent six months apart, but that they didn't know they'd all join back up eventually!! like wdym hardison spent months trying and failing to track down parker?? wdym parker gained a family and then spent half a year alone again?? wdym eliot had found a way to do some good or have some kind of purpose until it was suddenly over?? wdym nate & sophie had finally caught up with each other but came to realize that neither of them were in a place to have that relationship and spent months not knowing if that had been their last chance??
#leverage#leverageposting#especially parker and hardison. i get sad thinking about how she had adapted to maybe finally having people and then it was over#only for 6mo but as far as she knew it was probably forever#and then for hardison like. trying to track her down and failing. desperately trying to figure out how to find her. wondering if shes upset#that he hasnt contacted her. but also wondering if maybe she doesnt want to be found. maybe shes over him? maybe shes gone.#sophie at least evidently spent some of that time devising a way to get the team back together (and putting on a play)#the fact sophie managed to get an invite to parker while hardison couldnt find her is funny tho. i imagine soph had a different strategy.#trying to track her down means always being a step behind. id like to think soph instead predicted where parker *would* be.#wherever the shiniest thing to steal is. or that she set up a whole grift to both steal from a museum herself but also to entice parker to#steal from the museum and find a note hidden in the back of the most theft-worthy painting etc. idk.#but anyway hardison also looked so sad in the stork job when they briefly thought parker had run off ('trust me she is gone' 'whos gone?')#so actually losing her for 6mo + assuming it was probably forever is SO SAD#and parker not having her 'more than a team' team OW OUCH IM IN PAIN
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Thinking of vlr Akane is so conflicting cuz on one hand I’m so upset that she doesn’t ever get a moment to just rest and enjoy being alive again I’m upset that she just gets deeper and deeper into this role she’s built for herself and she loses her humanity and will never ever be that girl who died in the incinerator. But on the other hand, I need her to get so, so much worse I need her to be so obsessed with perfection she has this unique ability to change the course of history and she will burn everything and everyone to the ground in the blink of an eye if it means she can "reset" and get a perfect timeline and I desperately need her to never be satisfied with anything because really, is there anything that’s worth all the damage she’s caused?
#zero escape#akane kurashiki#virtues last reward#yeahhhhh just having so many thoughts about akane and sigma and junpei and yeah im screaming eyes bloodshot#i want akane to just like post 999 just do silly shit with aoi get a cat be a gamer try to heal the best she can#and i want her to be so evil i think theres still some crimes she hasnt committed yet she should do those#i really really really want her and junpei to just beat the shit out of each other in a boxing ring. specifically post vlr#need them being old as shit throwing chairs everyone is cheering#and damn like vlr akane just cant agree with junpei on his philosophy that a life with pain is still a life worth living cuz then thatd mean#everything she did in 999 was all for naught like to accept even the bad timelines where she died as valuable...#thats a kick to the dick especially when she fought so hard to live and how her death was so unfair#except she was just a scared kid with no choice then. now whats her excuse#i just want it to be possible you know? possible that akane didnt need to do this and she couldve been happy#cuz yeah the trauma would be horrible but surely itd be better than the trauma she has now since she took that dive#i wonder if she knows that no matter what she does she’ll never erase her trauma and eventually she will have to face it#or if she actually believes she can figure it all out and win the perfect timeline and magical mental stability will happen#basically akane is avoiding therapy soooooo hard but then again who would even be her therapist#no one can possibly understand her...right?
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Orbital trajectory.
#ieeha grew up with horrible tall people hes not scared of anything (even when he should be. actually *especially* then.)#ieeha ''i will not be the bigger person i WILL drag you down to my level'' de verral#sincerely hes a pain in the ass LOL. hissy cat coded#he and magnai are so funny to me cause theyre both passionate and clueless#in ways that are similar but also different simultaneously#its a LONG road. i dont think bridging the gap even comes into question until EW *earliest*#but im running out of tag space thanks for coming to my shiptalk--#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#ff14#final fantasy 14#hyur#midlander#magnai oronir#xaela#au ra#wolship#gpose#magnai oronir x warrior of light#wol#ffxiv screenshot#ieeha#ieeha de verral#nabaath-areng#ffxiv ship#ffxiv oc#and so they bicker a lot especially at first. and then dont know what to do once they grow closer
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"Rhaenyra isn't the stepmother, she's the mother who stepped up!"
The HOTD writers themselves are hardly doing anything to support that narrative, so I take this rhetoric with a grain of salt. While I think, in some way, Rhaenyra does care for Baela and Rhaena....if I had to point out a motherly figure for them that could pose as someone stepping in Laena's place, Rhaenyra would not be it.
#house of the dragon#hotd#hotd critical#rhaenyra targaryen critical#baela targaryen#rhaena targaryen#this mainly just comes from my frustration with this fandom painting rhae as overly motherly toward baela & rhaena#making it seem like we had so much to go on for her being a good stepmother when it's really the bear minimum#there's more with rhaenys being there for them than with rhae--- both physically & verbally#even with scenes where she's with them: for baela it holds more of political means with her having a dragon and then using her to see corly#like sure she could be concerned about her well-being but it's definitely not on the same level as with her sons#don't even get me started on with rhaena bc that “be a mother to them” line had me 🤬#and her referring to her sons as hers and the pain of sending them away but not adhering to rhaena's emotional needs and feelings of inferi#rity--- like it didn't sit right with me especially when she couldn't even be bothered to hug her#i like to enjoy headcanons about their relationship but the canon material doesn't stray far either#rhaenys raised baela alongside her on driftmark she sought rhaena out when they met after so long#she advocated for rhaena to her husband over joffery--- she's their grandMOTHER that stepped up tbh#tbh i wouldn't really be rocking with my stepmom if she sought after & slept with my dad at my mom & stillborn brother's funeral#barely comforted my sister and i when we were injured in a fight (only her sons)#then got married to said father not long after said funeral...like i'd be pressed tbh!#dni if you can't have a collected conversation about this#rhaenys targaryen#(also just bc im a little critical of rhae doesn't mean i hate her in comparison to others she's not that bad tbh)
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thinking about the relationship between mightily oats' "the worthwhile [words] don't burn" and constable dorfl's "the words in the heart cannot be taken"
#especially the journey both of them had to go through to get to the point of saying that. like the whole of carpe jugulum oats was so TORN#and before that too about what words could you believe and who could you really trust on their word about om and the prophets and he went#out of his way to look up records disproving what the book of om said bc he KNEW nothing they said could be believed and just all the pain#and all that doubt he went thru and the part where he questioned om's 'infinite compassion' as he prayed bc really what compassion?#how many people prayed at the stake just like he was doing in that moment? how many people had to live with the silence of their god just#like he did? but still when his book of om – that he clung to the whole book for reassurance – burned he said the worthily words don't burn#the worthily words are in the heart and in the mind and not feed into his mouth by old man who just#made things up to justify their actions. he had all the words he needded the whole time and holiness was always all around him. he just had#to look#and dorfl being created with words in his head that dictated his every move . words that chained him. then he and the other golems created#'king' for themselves in the hope he'd lead them to freedom but they put too many words in his head and he failed and carrot gave dorfl his#own freedom and his own words and that lead to dorfl destroying his well child basically and destroying himself in the process but the word#in his heart his OWN words remained and they were able to rebuilt him and vimes give him a voice and his words and belief remained in him b#they were always his#god. sorry for the ramble im severally unwell about them#mightily oats#constable dorfl#carpe jugulum#feet of clay#gnu terry pratchett#discworld
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My new elleth OC Naradis from my new Thranduil romance fic I'm working on 🫶🏽 It's so so exciting to write a longfic again, I've missed it a lot 🥹 I already love her sm, she’s everythiiiing 😩
Fun fact: She's wearing amber earrings ✨
#my art#my oc#Naradis#elleth oc#middle earth#the hobbit#thranduil romance fic#gonna post it when im finished so that takes a few months!#so excited!#she's so tough and full of pain tbh#theres gonna be lots of hurt and comfort#especially comfort later on because y'all know how much i love healing broken people
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the old man and the seat is such a good fucking episode.
i love anything that destroys rick. i love that he met someone like him and tried to kill him. i love that he still wanted to be friends with him. i love that the guy healed from what bonded him and rick together. i love that he went and lived a full life and died happy. i love that rick had set up that mean and awful trap for him but the dude never tripped it because he had moved on. i love that rick then had to sit there and listen to insult meant for the other guy coming from his own voice. i love that it all hits just as if it were meant for him
#i love. when characters hurt#when they feel pain#when they cry#especially when they do it to themselves#siri play just by radiohead#god im such a fucking loser stoner i hate it here#rick and morty
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i am a firm believer in the fact that tim has like…stupid blue eyes. ice blue eyes, that pierce into your soul and make you want to confess your sins just to make it stop. (that isn’t just his eyes, that’s the stare he learned from janet)
this also means that any time it snows and he goes outside, he gets absolutely blinded. he has to grab sunglasses and all of his siblings make fun of him for it extensively.
#im totally not speaking from experience#or projecting my pain onto tim#my eyes are grey#(like legitimately)#and i get blinded every time it’s bright out#but especially#when it snows#tim drake#red robin#robin#batfam
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Ahahaaaa oh my goddd can you not make "ADHD undereating" and "ADHD overeating" into a competition of who has it worse and who has nothing to complain about, that'd be awesome
#im not even going to reply to that person im not gonna argue with someone who clearly is fucking#grading my symptoms on if they're as bad as their#guess what i also feel like fucking shit when i overeat and it causes my body a lot of stress#and it fucks with my hormones and it fucks with my mood#and i live a piece of shit horrible terrible life whenever I can't get myself out of that and somehow#but my brain makes me do it and it's hard to stop and sometimes i have to eat even when im in pain#cause that's the only way i can concentrate on something or the only way that i can stimulate my brain#even though i feel sick and I don't want to do it anymore so maybe shut the fuck up#oh my godddd#fuck that person#oh i would take overeating any day maybe shut the fuck upppp#overeating especially on foods that stimulate the brain well PUTS YOU IN THE STATE OF UNDERNUTRITION JUST LIKE UNDEREATING#YOU IDIOTTTTT#sorry this is so personal to me and someone just went on a tirade on how much they have it worse cause they don't eat#good lord go fuck yourself#that post was just because i never see anyone talk about this i only ever see the other side of the coin and it makes me feel alone
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liney sympathies after a puck well blocked
florida panthers @ colorado avalanche | 1.6.25
#aleksander barkov#evan rodrigues#florida panthers#2425#can we please stop getting injured from pucks#who jinxed us 😭😭😭#sasha just staring at roddy writhing in pain for a second before he goes pat pat#there there roddy. captain sympathies will make you feel better.#helmet tappies are sure to make you feel better#sasha im sure there are other ways to make him feel better#didnt mean it like that but also i absolutely mean it like that#liney love is so beautiful but especially when mr honourary finn gets attemtion from a finn#im sure roddy was squealing after he got over the pain amen
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i wanna just cockwarm someones cock in my mouth maybe while we also smoke some weeed
#im having a lot of really normal thoughts rn#especially abt t4t sex lol#oral fixation goes hard when high on pain killers ive learned#justyn.txt#personal#ftm nsft#nsft ftm#nblm nsft#nsft nblm#mlm nsft#nsft mlm#t4t nsft#nsft t4t#trans nsft#nsft trans#ftm bottom#ftm sub#ftm puppy
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is this outfit historically accurate? probably the fuck not. is it practical in any way shape or form? also probably not! but does it serve cunt? YES 😩🙏💅 and that's all that matters!
#oc liveblogging#i feel so bad hakjshkgjhsk if any fashion designer/person who actually knows anything about fashion really saw my designs#they'd beat the absolute shit out of me. LIKE IM SOSRHSHF IM PROBABLY MIXING THINGS THAT WOULDNT MAKE SENSE BUT AHGH IM TRYING#i do reference a lot of shit and i am trying to get better at drawing cloth and such. my friends rly being into cosplay has made me start#thinking abt materials bc a lot of designs dont specify that yeah? and it is cool to think about like is that cotton or polyester or vinyl?#fuckk tho I THINK I BLAME VOCALOID & MONSTER HIGH FOR MY TASTE IN ALT FASHION FOR CHARA DESIGNS. MH ESPECIALLY TBH#being really into doll lines when i was younger in general means a lot of focus on the clothes bc yeah duh thats a main doll selling point?#btuahktjskgslg. fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.#now the problem of all time. my ass who loves to add little details but how many can i add w/o the design getting messy#and not being a pain in the ass to draw every time bc theres sm to do. i love coloring but also at what fucking cost man...#like i loveee lace but ITS SO FUCKING HARD TO DRAW. RUFFLES AND SHIT FGRAHHRHHH fuck u frilly fashions so cute but so hard to draw grrr#also on the historically accurate note grhhHGHAHH im so sorry but WHY IS MENS FASHION SO BORINGGG 😭😭😭#like maybe i need to look more but uGHHH generic suit generic brown suit plsease i need some variety. i know social expectations stuff yes#but ghshkgjsjh PLEASE. im trying im doing more research...
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do u think after the WD arc koyama and tsuchiya get together to like. spar with or without their powers? just meet up at the gym and Go To Town while normal patrons watch in awe?
YEAHHH absolutely, I figured back in Claw those two ended up reluctantly training together since they're both physical combat oriented. Had a pretty big rivalry that was tempered into something more cooperative after WD arc, they still work out together, often are each other's spotters, etc.
....I was initially going to draw out some fun sparring poses but then got caught up on the idea of Tsuchiya trying to fit all her hair into one of those clunky foam helmets.
You're one to talk, Koyama
#as someone who has super thick hair that used to poof out everywhere when it was in a bob haircut...I feel her pain...#especially in those kinds of sparring helmets that shit was like an oven when I did karate#ALSO IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO ANSWER.....trying to tidy up my ask box more#tsuchiya hana#koyama megumu#claw 7th division#asks#anon#marbleart
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