#especially crack crossovers
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catsconflictscopicsandchamomile · 10 months ago
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New Crackship Just Dropped
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yall know EXACTLY why
imagine these two together. what would they eat? WHO would they eat? its anyone's guess!
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fandomfuntimem · 1 year ago
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I had an idea, and i followed through on it.
My two favorite tragic yet hilarious dead bois.
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Snatcher: you must've been CRUSHED over your death. Though, personally my whole experience was CHILLING.
Also a bonus kitty cat cuz i was in my kitchen since its the most well lit room in the house. (I ended up switching to my bathroom floor cuz i realised my lense was dirty and i didn't feel like going back upstairs)
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kissmefriendly · 2 years ago
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Okay okay. I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna make a Discworld crossover. And, like almost all crossovers with Discworld, it’s the wizards’ faults. Can’t think of why an early 19th century man o war would be sailing about in The Circle Sea? The wizards did it.
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so-you-melted-22 · 2 years ago
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i am going to create the most convoluted crossover ever between two fandoms just because two characters look vaguely the same and you can not stop me!
#simon rileys father and roderick burgess look vaguely the same and thats all the signs from the universe i need to create the most absurd#and trauma filled expressionism fantasy AU ever posted onto this blog#its a sport#scp and check please#call of duty and the sandman#whats next#ent and the immortal also exists#but that wasnt me#but it is in the same vein#crack crossovers that are logistically so impractical are so incredibly funny#especially when theyre treated with complete seriousness#im gonna take your military propaganda and im gonna traumatize the characters so much they wish they could take the 'easy' way out#but to get bak to what im doing rn: i wanted some backstory on ghost so now im reading that modern warfare comic#and if that isnt the most hilarious depiction of punk concerts ive ever seen then i dont know#that shit is just so wildly unrealistic and innacurate i cant believe it#this is the most straightup military propaganda that literally does nothing to hide its intention ive seen since my 9th grade historybook#like you cannot take this serious#ive never played a call of duty game and i only know the plot from fanfics and a few youtube videos analyzing the warpropaganda aspects#but they cant always be this blatant right?#like there has to be a way to be a bit more subtle about this#the mcu is storytelling genious in comparison#that crucifix nail nipple vampire story was probably pulitzer worthy world literature in comparison#also it always switches between two artstyles that both look so weirdly uncanny i just cant#also what does raf stand for in englisch because i severely doubt its rote armee fraktion#stuff#text#i dont get that fucking skull imagery either#what is this comic#theyd have to pay me so much to draw this#no nation could bring up that much money
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teafiend · 11 months ago
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pillowdrawz · 1 year ago
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I just saw this and YEEEEESSS
Master Manipulator rise leo for the W.
He def Manipulate other Leo's thinking They have the best plan when Mf Rise Leo knows the enemy Straight up.
A secret enemy let's Think of this rationally While rise leo knows how to do it just pretend The enemy has the upper hand.
Then Boom It was all Rise leo plan after all
You will never understand my love for manipulator rise leo
Like why fight when you can bullshit girlboss your way out
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kentopedia · 1 year ago
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.đ–„” ʁ ˖ HOTEL ROOM — levi ackerman x f!reader x nanami kento
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summary. what’s a wedding for if not to make your boyfriends a little jealous?
contents. threesome, wedding guests, best friend satoru, teensy bit of jealousy, nsfw, aot/jjk crossover universe, teasing, cunnilingus, blowjob, piv, sub reader, slight degradation, brat taming, pet names, praise, teasing, unprotected sex — 5.5k
notes. welcome to the most self indulgent and filthy thing i have ever written ! this is for me & the two men i have been in love with for two years but i guess everyone else can read it too <3
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“your boyfriend looks pissed,” satoru says, peering over your shoulder. there’s a grin on his face as his bright irises flash, and he hands you a glass of champagne, bubbles rising to the surface. 
you take it from him, spilling a quarter of the alcohol down your throat before craning your neck to glance at the other side of the room. 
behind you, levi is talking to hange in a hushed voice, his expression, though not unchanged from his normal one, is thoroughly unamused. his face is pinched tighter than usual, a harsh set to his jaw. levi’s blue eyes, darkened with irritation, slide over to kento, who rests his hip against the counter, taking a long sip of whiskey. 
though levi isn’t looking at you, kento is, and you smile at him sweetly, taunting him with a little wave. 
you don’t wait to see kento’s response, and focus your attention back on satoru. “which one?” you ask, hiding your sly smile as you follow satoru out to the dance floor. a man takes your near-empty champagne glass, whisking it onto a tray with the other lipstick-stained cups. 
satoru smirks, taking your hand in his own to spin you in a circle, following the steps of the other couples around you. although you and satoru have been friends—and only friends—for years, you know a part of kento can’t help but be jealous, especially since you’d once had a crush on satoru as a teenager.
even though that had long since died, kento doesn’t bother to hide his antagonism for the older man. levi, on the other hand, will never admit to his possessiveness
 but he hates seeing you in the arms of anyone that isn't him. 
“so,” satoru hums, shaking his head as you nearly bump into a blonde couple beside you. “i take it you’re trying to be an instigator?”
you make a face. “what do you mean? i’m just dancing with my good friend satoru.”
“right.” satoru laughs, pulling you closer to his chest. something changes in him, for a brief moment, and you can see why everyone wants him. he lays the charm on a little thicker, smiles a little wider—you’re starting to wonder if he actually wants to seduce you. “if you want to make them jealous, at least do it the right way,” he says, putting on his prettiest blue eyes, batting them softly at you. 
“that’s not—” you start, but satoru offers you a knowing grin in return. you’ve been close friends for far too long, and he knows you far too well. any objections you have quickly die out on your tongue, and you sigh, leaning in closer. “fine. whatever.” 
you glance over at levi, and a part of you can’t even feel guilty, not when he’s watching you with icy eyes, wondering if there’s a moment he’d be able to catch satoru off-guard. 
he's a little possessive, a bit hotheaded. can you really be blamed for enjoying the irritation that rolls into kento’s normally calm eyes, the way levi’s jaw clenches tighter and tighter, until you can hear his teeth cracking together?
it’s almost amusing, really. they should know they have nothing to worry about.
“seems i’ve taught you well,” satoru begins, his cologne overwhelming your senses as he bows to your height. “i mean, you can always come back to my hotel room. this is a wedding, after all. the perfect time to spice things up.” 
you roll your eyes at him, snorting. “don’t push your luck, gojo. i’m sure you’ll manage to find someone else to keep your bed warm tonight.” 
satoru sighs, pressing a hand to his heart like you’d fatally wounded him. “hm. i’ll get you to fuck me one of these days.” though, for once, he sounds a little too serious, like he’s actually imaging that playing out. “if you can keep the two of them around, then you must—”
the song comes to an end, and you pull away from your old friend, stopping whatever lewd comment he was about to make. “that’s enough of that, satoru.” you say, ignoring his protests, his faux innocence when he pretends not to know what he said. 
but gojo’s attention is taken up a few seconds later by shoko, and you leave them, heading towards a table with small desserts and drinks. as you pick up a plate, jean kirstein approaches, his eyebrows knit together as he fiddles with the bottom of his shirt. 
you smile at him, but jean doesn’t smile back. “is
 something wrong?” you ask, uncertain if he even wanted you to question him.
jean opens his mouths, shuts it, then sniffs. “do you think you could manage to stop pissing off levi?” he finally says, picking up a plate next to you, following your actions as he sifts through the desserts. “he’s going to take it all out on us at training tomorrow.” 
you open your mouth to respond, but you don’t get the chance to let the words spill from your lips. 
behind you, kento says your name, and you turn, facing him with the pile of small desserts still in your hand. jean freezes awkwardly next to you, glancing between the blonde man and yourself. 
“everything okay, ken?”
“i’m just going back to the room,” kento says, putting his hands in his pocket, looking at you pointedly. his dark eyes shift over to jean, before fixating back on you. “just wanted to let you know.”
you smile at him sweetly, nod once. “okay,” you say, offering him a treat from the plate. “want one before you go?” 
kento relaxes, but he shakes his head. “i’m fine." he shifts to his other foot. “so. you’re going to stay here?” 
though kento is too polite to ask you to come with him, especially in front of jean, you can sense his underlying irritation. half of the guests had already gone home, and it was well after midnight... much later than either of you intended to stay out. 
still, you smile, cheeks flushed from all of the alcohol, dancing, and the heat of your boyfriend’s gaze. “yeah, i’ll come up in a bit. i still haven’t danced with jean!” 
kento raises an eyebrow, glancing over at the younger man once more, who stares back at him like a deer in headlights. 
“oh, um—” jean laughs awkwardly, scratching the back of his head as you sigh, taking a bite of one of the desserts. 
kento blinks, but ignores jean’s rambling, and fishes his wallet out of his pocket. “fine,” he says, pulling a white, plastic room key out of it. “let me know if you need anything, sweetheart.” 
you smile widely and kiss him once on the cheek. though the irritation is still evident in his dark irises, your lips ease him a bit, and he lets a small smile lift on his face. as kento leaves, you glance at the other corner of the room, and note that levi is already gone. 
your expression sours; he didn’t even bother to tell you, and there aren’t any messages from him on your phone. 
“why’d you have to drag me into it?” jean mumbles, drawing you out of your thoughts. 
a heavy exhale leaves you—you might as well enjoy the rest of the night, even if you’re not sure how angry levi is going to be when you get back. 
“well, you just seem pretty miserable,” you admit to jean, clearing all thoughts of kento and levi from your mind. that's a problem for the future you to endure. “thought i could at least keep you some company.” 
he smiles, but its half-hearted.
truly, you’re not sure how jean can stand to see the woman he loves get married to another. 
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you’re sweaty by the time you retreat to your room, skin hot from the dancing, and feet sore from the heels you’d worn for the entirety of the day. 
not many people were left in the ballroom when you’d left. there were just a few close friends of eren and mikasa’s, and you’d stayed as well, flitting in between each of the couples to chat, feeling more lively with the buzz of alcohol in your veins. 
the hotel hallway is quiet when you approach, and you press the key into the door, waiting for the light to turn green. it lets you into the room, and quietly, you shut it behind you, not wanting to wake levi and kento if they're already asleep. 
though, when the door clicks, you notice that the room isn’t completely dark; there are still lamps on throughout the suite, and you can hear the soft patter of shower water running. the bathroom light is on, and there’s shuffling on the other side of the door. 
you slip your heels off and walk towards the bedroom, ignoring the pain that lingers in the balls of your feet. “levi?” you say, in nothing above a whisper, announcing your presence before opening the door. 
the bedroom is darker, but on the other side of the threshold, you can still make out the shape of the dark-haired man. levi has his back turned, the pale expanse of his skin exposed to you as he slips off his shirt. 
though you know he’s annoyed at you, you can’t stop yourself from staring at the muscles that flex and recoil as levi folds his shirt up. 
he looks over his shoulder, blue eyes flashing as he places his t-shirt shirt back with his other clothes. “so you finally decided to come back,” levi quips, his voice hard and low as he turns, facing you from just a few feet away. “are you done playing your silly little game now?” 
he says it calmly, but you can heart the danger that lies beneath it as his eyes trace over your body, lingering on the swell of your breasts under your form-fitting dress. 
levi’s severe gaze leaves you swallowing nervously, something twisting in your stomach as you watch the harsh set of his jaw. you’re not afraid to push levi’s button’s, but you’ve never gotten used to the passion and adoration that pierces his normally serious irises. 
still, you can tell he’s irritated now, and though he’s usually more serious than even kento, he’s not as good at hiding his anger. 
“what game?” you ask innocently as levi backs you into a corner, his scowl deepening. he smells nice, freshly showered, and his hair is soft as it falls across his forehead. levi’s strong hand comes against the wall beside your head, palm spread next to your ear. “i just wanted to have fun with my friends.” 
levi lets out a laugh, but it’s low, sarcastic, without any sense of real humor. “and you can’t even spare a dance for me?” he says, pinning you with his gaze. your back hits the wall, and you stare at him, lips parting as a small breath leaves you. although you are trying hard not to let your eyes drift down to his chest, you are distracted, heart fluttering in your ribcage. 
“you hate dancing, levi,” you say, a breath of air. 
levi glares, tracing his fingers softly across your jaw. “not with you.” 
though you were trying to taunt him for a moment longer, the admission has you softening, and you lean forward, your lips parting to kiss him. but you don’t get far; levi steps away, leaving you in the corner, desperate for his mouth on your own as he stalks towards the other side of the bed. 
“levi,” you whine, following after him with a deep frown. your hands instinctively reach out for him as he makes his way across the room, shoulders tense when you sensuously run your fingers over his bare spine. “i want—”
the rest of your sentence is lost to air as levi turns, his eyes narrowed harshly before yanking you forward. 
you stumble over your feet, closer to him, and he pushes you onto the bed, his movements much faster and smoother than anticipated. a gasp leaves you as you fall onto the mattress, your back sinking into it with a thump. 
“you spend all evening on the arm of other men, and now you’re trying to tell me what you want,” levi says, pinning your wrists to the bed as he climbs over your. his dark hair falls, nearly into your face as you blink up at him, arousal spiking deep in your stomach. 
levi isn’t as tall as kento, but he’s just as strong, manhandling you easily onto your back so he can tower over you. your face grows warm, and you watch him with wide eyes, shy under the weight of his heavy gaze.
“levi—” you say again, his name leaving your lips with a small whisper. 
“what’s the matter?” he slowly drags his lips across your chest as you squirm. “earlier, you couldn’t keep your mouth shut. flirting with every man at eren’s fucking wedding. and now—” 
levi drags his hands down to your hips slowly, pressing you into the bed as his fingers curl into the bone. your eyes flutter shut, the feeling of his graceful fingers on your stomach close to tantalizing, so slender, but so rough. 
“they’re my friends,” you breathe, licking your lips. “i wasn’t flirting, i was just talking.” 
really, that tiny detail doesn’t matter anymore. you just want levi’s mouth on your own. 
“didn’t look like it to me,” he says pointedly, unamused. “you were practically begging everyone in that room to fuck you.” levi’s hand tightens around your hips, not allowing you any space to move. “a pathetic attempt at trying to make us jealous.” 
you stare up at him from under your lashes, a lazy smile pulling onto your lips. “from where i’m standing, i’d say it worked pretty well.” 
levi’s jaw clenches tighter, but he doesn’t get the opportunity to respond. the door opens once more, and kento comes in, wearing nothing but a towel, his hair still damp, falling onto his head in loose strands. 
you take one look at him, the drops of water that run over the planes of his chest, and salivate. his skin is still tan from your vacation, blond hair light from the sun. he’s beautiful, so beautiful—but a frown pollutes his face as he enters the room. 
he takes a look between you, eyes narrowing at levi. “i said to wait until i got out of the shower.” 
“i’m impatient,” levi retorts in a gruff voice, sitting up slightly, even as he keeps you pinned on the bed with his thighs. 
“that’s obvious.” kento snorts, sliding his gaze over to you. “already starting without me.” he’s upon you quickly, two slow strides to the bed as he carefully observes the atmosphere. a sigh leaves him, and he brushes a heavy hand over your forehead, soothingly. “what are we going to do with you, sweetheart?” 
you swallow, eyes wide as you stare back at him.
kento drops the towel from his waist, exposing his thick, muscular thighs and his cock, resting limply between them. with levi’s hands all over your body, you’re already getting wet.
“i didn’t do anything—” you begin, but as you try to squeeze your legs together, levi stops you, knowing exactly the kind of relief you are searching for.
“nope,” he snaps, prying your thighs back apart, his eyes narrowing. “if you’re going to act like a fucking brat, then we’ll just have to treat you like one, hmm?” levi tugs you forward harshly, bringing your knees around his waist. “don’t try to act coy.” 
his fingertips dig into your thighs, and you sit up on your forearms, glancing back at kento, trying your best to bat your pretty eyes in the way you know he likes. “but i didn’t mean, it, ken,” you say as levi hikes your dress up, revealing the smooth skin of your thighs. “i’m sorry—”
kento shakes his head, and slips behind you, climbing onto the bed, forcing you sit up completely. “a little too late for that,” he says, resting your back against his chest. he kisses your shoulder softly, much more gentle than the way that levi is grabbing at your skin. kento’s large palms rest on your stomach, and you reach for them, squeeze at his hands as he smiles against your neck. “you’re supposed to be a good girl for us, aren’t you?” 
his voice is husky, tired, and you nod, seeking a kiss from the blonde man that you love so dearly. but even kento, who is always so much sweeter with you than levi, refuses that. 
“clearly, she needs to be taught a lesson,” levi snorts, dragging a finger up your panties, humming when finds your arousal already gathered there. “can’t have you forgetting who you belong too, can we?” he asks, blue eyes sharp as he pushes your panties to the side. 
you squirm when his finger parts your folds, grazing your clit as he gathers the slick around it. a spark ignites in your chest, and then, levi slips a finger into you, slowly, tauntingly. you lean back into kento, who holds you still, interlocking one of your hands with his own. 
“can’t be happy with just the two of us, can you?” kento asks, kissing the underside of you jaw. your head tips back, eyes fluttering shut as levi adds a second finger, your walls stretched as he draws in and out of you. “would you rather have satoru? maybe you’d trade both of us for just one of him—”
“n-no,” you say, reveling in the feeling of kento’s lips on your neck, levi’s delicate fingers deep inside you. “i promise, i don’t want him—”
you squelch around levi, the sounds of your cunt growing louder in the dim room, and he tugs at your knees, spreading your legs wider. your pussy is on full display to him, lacy black panties doing little to hide the fact that you're dripping. 
“didn’t seem that way to us." levi's voice is deep and rough as he glares at you. “seemed like you wanted everyone to think we can’t take of our girl.” 
sinful noises leave you as his hand moves faster, drags against your soaked walls, clit untouched and desperate for attention.
“levi,” you gasp, swallowing down your pride. “please—”
“not letting you off the hook that easily, sweetheart,” kento says, pushing the loose straps of your wine colored dress down, letting it fall. it slips easily off your breasts, revealing the lacy, black strapless bra that matches your panties.
though, that doesn’t remain for much longer; kento groans deeply in your ear, your breasts bouncing softly as he tugs the undergarment off. 
“such pretty tits,” kento says, a large, warm palm coming to cup one of them. his finger grazes across your nipple, squeezing once, and you throw your head back against his shoulder, whimpering as levi forces his another finger down to the knuckle. “fuck, the sounds you make—”
“you’re too fucking nice to her, kento.” levi is on the verge of rolling his eyes as he lowers his head to your thighs. for a moment, you think he might kiss your leg, reveal the love that he is hiding from you—but he thinks better of it and forces your legs further apart. his tongue drags against your pussy, gathering your slick before he sucks at your clit.
you moan, grabbing at kento’s thighs that are woven around your hips, digging your nails into his flexed muscles. tiny crescent marks are left there, but kento barely notices, too busy biting a bruise into your neck as he plays with your tits. 
“i don’t have to be an ass like you to teach her a lesson,” kento breathes against your neck, and you shudder, eyes fluttering closed, unable to do anything but writhe under their strong holds. “besides, she’s so perfect—”
you can’t focus on the rest of kento’s words, not when levi’s tongue is flicking in and out of you, lapping up the juices that are spilling out of your cunt. your stomach vibrates with need, and you can feel yourself close to release, exhales leaving your chest as you attempt to shift yourself forward. 
“don’t even try it,” levi glares at you, his gaze even more menacing under the mound of dark hair, lips glistening from your cunt. 
“wanna cum levi,” you cry out, not sure how much longer you’ll last with kento pinching at you, squeezing your tits with his warm palms. “please, i’m so close—”
“who said you were going to cum, brat?” levi snaps, stilling his movements for a moment as you whine, missing the feeling of his fingers deep inside you, his lips sucking at your clit. you clench around nothing, throbbing as he stares down at you empty pussy. “don’t think you deserve that.”
“just let her cum so i can fuck her, levi,” kento says, a shiver radiating through your entire body as he traces his hands down your stomach, rubbing at your clit. his fingers are thicker than levi’s, his hands bigger, and you know it won't be long before you reach your orgasm. 
“kento.” you whine, turning your cheek to face him, reveling in the small little smile that rests on his lips. “so close—”
though, your moment of relief is taken from you as levi swats kento’s hand away, going down on you again, twice as fast. “hey,” levi grabs your attention once more, slipping his fingers back inside your cunt. “eyes on me. i’m the one with my fingers in your pussy.” 
you gasp, writhing as kento kisses you, runs his hands all over your skin. “feels s’ good, levi." though you are vibrating between them, you obey, keeping your eyes focused on levi’s, too intimidated by the heat of his gaze. 
“promise to behave now, angel?” kento says, humming into your neck, a hand caressing your stomach lovingly. “you’re our sweet girl, right?” 
your mind short circuits as levi puts his mouth on you once more, and you cum, your body shaking from your orgasm, clenching tight around levi’s fingers. “levi, levi.” his name leaves your lips over and over, mumbled bliss as he works you through it, your sensitive cunt aching. 
you feel mushy, shaky as kento shifts behind you, places his hand on your hips. there is no time for you to recover, to indulge in the blissfulness that comes with release. kento pushes your hips forward, encouraging you to move.
“get on all fours for me,” he says, and though his voice is soft, sweet, there is still a sense of a command there. 
you comply, but your mind is hazy from your orgasm, still focused on the feeling of kento behind you, levi in front of you. they both eye you with a culmination of lust and love, and you feel sick with it, shifting for kento so that your dripping cunt is on perfect display for him. 
kento hums, sitting up along with you, so that his cock is positioned near your entrance. without warning, he dips a finger into your walls, smiling when you softly whine, sensitive already. kento gathers up your slick, rubbing you only for a moment before retreating, withdrawing his soaked fingers. “you get so wet for us, sweetheart. such a needy little thing, aren’t you?” kento teases, running his tongue over his fingers as you watch over your shoulder. 
you wonder if maybe you could cum again, on the spot, just from that; the sight of kento licking your arousal from his hands as you clench around nothing. “kento, need your cock,” you blabber, barely holding yourself upright—you feel weak, arms and legs like jelly. 
kento lets out a laugh, his tip teasing your entrance. without thinking, you sink your hips back, try to push him inside of you, but he stops you, stilling your movements. “thought you said you’d be good now?” he asks, kissing your spine gently. 
“i promise, kento, please, please,” you say, desperate for him to touch you. but kento doesn’t move, waits until levi has slipped his sweatpants off, thrown them over the edge of the bed. 
“sound so pretty when you beg.” kento’s voice is soft, loving, gentle as he kneads the skin of you ass. 
levi, though, doesn’t let the attention stay on the other man for much longer. he strokes his cock, but he is already painfully hard, leaking at the tip as he glowers over you. “she sounds impatient,” he counters, his voice deep, rough, and authoritative. you meet his eyes from under thick lashes, mouth watering at the sight of his pretty cock just inches from your face. “maybe she’ll stop running her mouth with my dick in it.” levi runs his finger over your lips, parting them with his thumb. as if on instinct, you let your jaw fall open, your cunt aching and soaked, too desperate for release to care about how debauched you look.
“wanna taste you, levi,” you say, whimpering as kento edges his tip into your dripping hole. your hands shake on the bed, and you blink rapidly as your sensitive pussy throbs and aches, pulsing around your blonde lover. 
“tch, ‘course you do. you’re so fucking hungry for my cock.” levi seems annoyed, but he still runs a delicate hand through your hair before he pushes against your lips. 
at the same time, kento sinks into you, a deep groan leaving him. “fuck, sweetheart, just slipped right into you. pretty pussy was made for my cock, wasn’t it?” 
you moan as you taste the saltiness of the precum leaking from levi, taking as much of him as you can into your mouth. he’s not as thick as kento, but he’s just as long, pretty and veiny as you run your tongue along the length of him. 
kento leans over your back, his strong hands curling around your sides as he drags himself in and out of you, fingers digging into your hips. your eyes flutter shut from the stretch, and you moan around levi’s mouth, distracted by his hands, rough in your hair. 
for a moment, you pause, breathing as you clench around kento, but levi doesn’t give you enough time to think; he drags your mouth back down his cock, his pretty fingers tight against your scalp. “levi—” you start, but his names falls on a loose breath as you gasp, your cheeks hot when you smoothly catch the dark look in his irises. 
“don’t cum until we tell you to, brat,” levi says, scowling, though there is a breathlessness starting in his words, a hint of affection as you bob your head up and down his length. as mean as levi tries to be sometimes, he can't seem to get rid of the love that seeps into his voice when he’s inside you.
you nod an affirmation as best you can before sinking back down on him, breathing heavier through your nose. 
kento pushes into your fluttering walls deeper, faster, his cock stretching you more than levi’s fingers had before. “look so pretty like this, angel. always take us both so well,” kento says, squeezing the soft skin of your sides gently as he forces himself further, until he’s inside of you completely, the burn deliciously painful. 
you try to whimper, feeling your own juices trickle, smear between the inside of your thighs, but your mouth is too full of levi for any sounds to come out. 
“focus on what you’re doing." levi's attempt at snapping fizzles out. his tone has lost its bite. his eyes are getting hazier, eyelids fluttering with each drag of your tongue, your mouth so much smaller around his cock. “not letting you cum until i do.” 
you balance on one hand, the other reaching up to fondle levi’s balls as you drag your tongue slowly along the vein on the underside of his cock. levi inhales deeply, digging his fingers into your hair, his nails scratching against your scalp. his cheeks, the bridge of his nose are dusted pink, eyes a deep navy. 
you bat your dazed eyes at him. levi is so beautiful, and you’re so deeply in love with him, desperate to see the flush of his face, the way his lips part in ecstasy when he finally reaches his orgasm. 
a hand drifts across your stomach as kento hum, his chest vibrating. “being such a good girl for us,” he whispers, and though you can’t see him, you know he is smiling, his eyes always so gentle, even when you spent the entire night trying to rile him up. 
you can feel yourself getting closer, kento hitting the spot deep within you, levi’s taste so intoxicating that you’re blind to your surroundings. 
“just like that, my love." drunk on the feeling of your mouth, levi's dark eyes finally soften as you run your tongue along his tip. “aren’t you pretty?” his thumb traces your cheek softly, and the normal affection is back on his face. it fuels you to drag your mouth up his length faster.
levi's praise is much more fleeting then kento’s, but it’s genuine, always coming when he’s desperately close to finishing. a moan, deep and muffled, reverberates in his chest as he thrusts his hips forward, fucking your face.  
“she’s close,” kento groans, reaching around your stomach to dip his finger between your thighs. “i can feel it. she's squeezing me so fucking tight.” 
“mouth feels so good," levi rasps, his breathing uneven, chest rising erratically. “fuck, fuck, you’re gonna make me cum” he lets a string of curses leave him, his lips parting beautifully, flushed and red. “better swallow every last fucking drop."
“don’t think that’ll be an issue,” kento hums, and his fingertips graze your clit, causing you to gush around him. “she always wants our cum so bad.” teasingly, he leans down to whisper, more to you than levi. “i don’t think i even have to ask if she wants me to cum inside.” 
“shit,” levi breaths, sputters, and then he spills into your mouth, warm ropes of cum shooting into your throat. 
you swallow as much as you can, trying not to gag as it dribbles out of the corner of your mouth, milking levi through his orgasm. but you’re too focused on the feeling of kento, and your eyes flutter shut as you force your hips back, your brain glossed over, nothing but need there.
that moment is short-lived.
levi pinches your cheeks, forces you to open your eyes and look at him. though his fingers dig into your skin, right below the bone, his eyes are soft as he leans down. 
“cum." the word is whispered against your mouth, the sharp tone he uses as a captain. then, levi kisses you, licks across your lips to taste himself there.
you whimper into his mouth, falling forward into him as you clench hard around kento, the knot inside of you releasing. your orgasm hits you hard, blurs the room around you, narrowed down to nothing but the man in front of you and the one behind. 
“mm,” kento hums, but his voice is low, raspy. “god, made such a mess all over me, fuck, love you so much, sweetheart—” 
kento lasts only a few moments more, spilling into your cunt, his cum filling you up, coating your walls white. 
you breathe heavily, whining into levi's neck as he holds you, lets kento pump the last bit of cum from his cock, heavy pants escaping his chest.
“look at you,” levi says, tracing his fingers over your face, smoothing the hair away from your sweaty forehead. "so fucking pretty all filled up with our cum."
kento, slowly, drags himself out of you, makes another sound, already missing the feeling of your pussy clenching around him. you feel empty, blinking as levi gathers your up in his arms, kisses your forehead.
"mmm." levi hums, because, really, he can't help the fact that you soften him up, make him a little bit sick with affection. "i love you."
you smile. "love you both," you say, closing your eyes as kento smatters kisses across your back, levi's touch gentle as he caresses your sides. "'m sorry."
kento laughs, brushing your hair off to one shoulder, kissing between your shoulder blades. "no you're not." he nuzzles your back, resting his cheek against your spine. two strong arms wrap around your waist.
"we're not idiots," levi continues, a snort leaving him. "i'm sure you spent the whole evening plotting with satoru. nice try though."
you smile, dopey and blissful. "well, it worked, didn't it? i did make you jealous."
neither of them respond.
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anyway.
tehehe thank you for reading !! reblogs appreciated !
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burreauxsworld · 30 days ago
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Locked In (1) | Joe Burrow
Joe Burrow x Singer!Reader
Exboyfriend!joshallen x Exgirlfriend!reader
‱‱‱
Being in the spotlight isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Yeah, there’s glitz and glamour and getting to live out your dream you’ve had since you were a little girl, but deep down you’re still human, with normal human emotions. Emotions that are completely normal, even when people tell you to never show them. You honestly were doing so well considering the circumstances you were left with. A completely shattered heart, an album that had just dropped (full of love songs written about the person that shattered your heart), and a sold out stadium tour that would take place over the entire summer. You were thriving. Slowly but surely, your heart mended itself back together every time you took the stage. Nothing could stand in your way.
Then football season rolled around and people started noticing that you weren’t in your normal spot, in a suite at Highmark Stadium. Supporting the man you believed you would spend the rest of your life with. Even had the ring to prove it. But it all came crashing down the night you walked in on him in bed with his ex from college. It absolutely crushed you. Especially because Josh Allen seemed like the perfect guy. He treated you well, showed you off in public, spoke about you in post-game interviews, the whole nine yards. You never would have saw this coming in a million years. But it did, and it felt like the worst day of your life.
Pre season wasn’t too bad, people just assumed you were busy. Then week one came and you still weren’t there, and people started to question things. Headlines quickly made their way into the world, it was mentioned in sports news all over the country, and you and Josh had started to trend on Twitter. It was all mixed feelings. Mostly just men that were happy to see you go, the women tearing Josh down, and some fans that were devastated about the split. You never commented on the topic. You figured you’d let it die down, and at some point it would be addressed in a normal adult way.
Josh had other plans.
He’d gone on a podcast for barstool sports, and when asked about the topic he didn’t shy away from lying to the entire world. “We both have pretty busy lives. She was going to be starting her tour and didn’t really have a lot of time on her hands. There’d be times where she’d go days without reaching out to me. I just couldn’t live that way anymore”
You were dumbfounded. Completely and utterly baffled. “Brittany and I reconnected last season when we played the Chiefs. It had been such a long time since I’d seen her. We kept in touch. But assure you, there was no crossover. I’d never even think about cheating on a woman”
Blow number two. The cheating had went on far longer than you’d realized, and right under your nose. You were too busy catching up with Taylor Swift in the suite to notice that your fiancĂ© met up with his ex. “I think I’m the happiest I’ve been in a while. I can’t speak for Y/N but I can honestly say for myself that I checked out of that relationship a year before it ended. I could not physically live that way anymore”
You couldn’t watch anymore. You powered your phone off and threw it to the end of your couch. Tears streaming down your face, your heart feeling like it shattered all over again. He’d just proposed to you in July of last year, the two of you started planning your wedding for the off season. It was all a lie.
You thought about retaliating. Putting him on blast the same way he did you, but that wouldn’t make you feel better. At this point, you weren’t sure what would make you feel better, but you knew you couldn’t be sad over him anymore. You needed to pick yourself back up.
‱‱‱
2 days later
You laughed hysterically as you threw your head back. When you realized your management team wasn’t laughing with you, you slowly stopped laughing. “Oh you guys are serious?” You question, dumbfounded. “Absolutely not. I’m not stepping foot into another football game for the rest of my life” you say firmly. “Y/N, it’s just to sing the national anthem, and then you can leave. You don’t have to stay for the entire game” your manager, Ryan, tells you with hope in his voice.
“And what reason am I going to give the media for leaving? That I was a heartbroken little child so I couldn’t stay? That’ll do more harm than good and you know it” you rant, letting out a sigh. “I don’t have a choice, do I?” You question, and put your head down when Ryan makes a face.
“It’s out of my hands. The record label won’t produce your album if you say no”
“When and where?” You say, reluctantly. “Sunday, October 6th, and in Cincinnati. This is the first AFC North divisional. There will be a lot of viewers and attendees already but you singing the national anthem would raise those numbers. The NFL is paying you very well to do this, plus you have a private suite with your name on it if you would like to stay,” Ryan explains, not tearing his eyes from you. He knew how hard this would be for you. He hated even having to ask you to do this.
“I’ll be there. But only because the future of my album rides on this. The NFL literally makes me sick to my stomach right now” you rant, rolling your eyes. “You can’t let one guy deter you from your passion of football. You loved football even before he who shall not be named. Besides, I will be there the entire time, and so will Megan. Megan is kick ass at what she does. All this Voldemort nonsense is gonna be put behind us. Clean slate, Y/N/N” Ryan assures you, and you crack a smile. “Voldemort?” You question.
“Oh yeah, he sucks. He’s lucky you’re giving him the grace that you are, and that you held me back from beating his ass that night” Ryan rants, and you laugh. Grateful that not only is he your manager, but one of your best friends. “But seriously, I’ll be there, next to you the entire day. And a little birdie told me you have some fans on the Bengals. Who knows, you may find a hotter guy that’ll be an upgrade from shit-for-brains” Ryan teases, and you scoff.
“I doubt it. I’ve sworn off athletes. Especially ones that play professional football”
“You say that now,” Ryan winks as he leaves the room, and you roll your eyes, yet again.
‱‱‱
Sunday October 6th, 2024
You heard the whispers as you walked past people. The judgmental comments about you neglecting your relationship, how you were the reason for its demise. The awful things people were saying about you, and screaming at you, almost made you want to crawl into a hole and never come out. The worst ones, were the looks of sympathy you got from the women in the stadium. You knew you shouldn’t have agreed to this.
“Ryan, I don’t know if I can do this. They all hate me” you stress, and he’s already shaking his head at you. “They don’t hate you-“
“Slut!”
“Seriously?” You say, with a flat tone. “Okay, so some macho men are just mad that you’re here. Who cares? Y/N, your career is literally riding on this”
“I can get a new label” you retort and Ryan sighs. “Y/N, you got this. You’ve literally dealt with so much worse than this-“
“Y/N, you’re on in 10” an NFL official says, walking past the two of you. You feel like your throat is closing up. There’s a lump that wouldn’t go away. In all the years you’ve been performing for big crowds, this one had you nervous. “Josh turned me into a social pariah when it comes to the NFL. He literally blamed me for everything, Ryan. I shouldn’t be here” you rant, tears brimming your eyes. “You absolutely deserve to be here. And for what it’s worth, I wouldn’t have been upset if you spoke your truth. Damage control is my job, let me worry about that. You just go out there and sing your heart out” another voice chimes in, and you turn your head to see Megan, your publicist.
“It’s time,” Ryan says. “Y/N, keep your head held high. You can do this. I’ll be right over on the Bengals sideline waiting for you to finish” Ryan assures you, as the three of you walk toward the opening to the field. Here goes nothing.
‱‱‱
After The Game
You should’ve known that staying at the game would mean Ryan would convince you to go to the after party. Although the game ended in a Ravens win, the team still seemed to be in good spirits. A lot of them were actually a lot of fun to be around. You were originally invited by Ja’Marr Chase, who made a point to come up to the suite and invite you personally. Letting you know that he and a few other guys were big fans, though part of you thinks he was just being nice.
You came in and conversed with him and a few other guys before making your way to the bar, then to an empty booth in the corner of the room. Ryan was mingling with some of the coaches and Megan decided not to attend the party, so you were pretty much left to your own devices. You nursed your dirty shirley as you scrolled through twitter. A lump forming in your throat at the harsh things being said about you.
“You really shouldn’t look at that stuff. I’ve learned that the hard way”
Your head snapped up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice, as the couch dipped next to you. “I hope this seat isn’t taken, though you’ve been sitting by yourself for the last half hour. Not that I was watching like a creep. I promise. I just got tired of standing at the bar” the deep voice rambled. “You’re okay. The seats not taken” you say, a small smile gracing your features.
“I’m just not very popular at the moment” you admit, taking another sip of your drink. “You played really well today, by the way. If you ask me, the Bengals had that in the bag” you say, changing the subject and he scoffs. “Always room for improvement,” he says, sipping his drink. “I’m Joe, by the way” he says, extending his hand to you.
“Y/N,”
“And since we’re voicing opinions, you didn’t deserve to be dragged down in the media. I’m not sure what actually happened, and by no means am I asking you to tell me, but I think it should have stayed private. Josh seemed like a nice guy, but that was a low blow” Joe says, not looking at you, as he yet again sips his drink. You frowned at the mention of Josh, and sank back against the couch. “Thanks, I guess,” you mutter, bringing your glass up to your lips. Joe looks over at you, and mentally face-palms.
“I’m so sorry. I overstepped. I shouldn’t have commented on something I know nothing about,” he says, a sense of urgency in his tone. “I literally came over here with liquid courage, with the intention of getting to know you and I fucked it up by bringing up your ex. I’m such an idiot” Joe rants, leaning back against the couch. You look over at him, a strange feeling in your stomach.
“Joe, it’s okay. You were trying to make conversation-“
“But I could’ve asked like what your favorite color is, not brought up your ex” Joe says, internally beating himself up. “It’s yellow” you answer, and he looks over at you confused. “My favorite color is yellow” you say, and he smiles. “Let’s start over. I’m Y/N Y/L/N,” you say, extending your hand with a smile.
“I’m Joe Burrow. It’s nice to meet you, Y/N”
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minus-plus-zer0 · 2 months ago
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The Bakusquad Gaming Group - Ch. 1 - Introduction
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| Masterlist | The Bakusquad Gaming Group Masterlist | | Next | ♡ Genre: Fluff, little crack ♡ Pairing: Gamer!Bakugou x Gamer!Reader ♡ Tags: Crossover (MHA x multiple franchises), gaming AU, Quirkless AU, aged up ♡ Summary: You're a pink and girly Let's Player who recently rose to fame. Eventually, your brand grows enough to attract the attention of the (in)famous Bakusquad. Their leader, Bakugou Katsuki, has especially taken a liking to you. This story follows your daily lives together as part of the Bakusquad.
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You made waves in the gaming community as an up and coming Let's Player. Your pink and cutesy aesthetic could only be matched by the cozy games you played, with the occasional Dark Souls and DOOM Eternal mixed in.
Your following grew over time but you needed to network to continue your brand growth. Although your channel currently rode high on your DOOM Eternal Let's Plays, you noticed that a popular gaming group called the "Bakusquad" made themselves known by playing Animal Crossing, and you wanted in.
You actually recognized their leader, Bakugou Katsuki (aka his username "Dynamight"), as somebody who attended your old university. But you two never interacted and you never saw him in-person. He wasn't the type of guy who would collaborate with anyone, and even his own group had a hard time getting a hold of him. This could be his and your chance to break further into the multiplayer scene.
But how would you contact him? Emailing him felt too formal for a guy who regularly shirked formalities, and he blocked whoever slid into his DM's, plus he wasn't exactly friendly in-person on the off-chance you ever got to see him face-to-face.
But after watching some of his videos, you knew the best way to get his attention was through force.
You publicly challenged him on social media to a 1v1 fight in an old fighting game that you secretly knew the ins and outs of. You purposefully chose this one since it didn't look like anything you, a girly gamer, would be interested in. You tagged him and then you called upon your followers to get his attention, but it didn't take long before he was sliding into your DMs, mad as all hell.
"What the fuck was that?" was his first text. "You seriously challenging me?"
You didn't reply. You just screenshotted his DM, posted it onto social media, and tagged him again.
Your only words in your post were, "I'm dead serious. <3"
"Oh it is on." That was Bakugou's last DM to you.
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Even though it wasn't his idea, Bakugou personally led the organization of the event from here on out. He shot you multiple curt texts of the time of the event, the rules, and instructions on the technical aspects of getting you both into an online call. He even gave you his phone number so that you could communicate faster. Now that caught you off-guard.
While you rested in the privacy of your own bedroom, you dialed his number. You felt the intense urge to tease him for even giving you his contact info. Before he could get a word in, you were already on his ass.
"Do you give everybody your phone number?" you asked.
"Huh? What, hell no! This is an important event as part of both our channels so I had to--"
"You sound so much stuffier in real life, oh my gosh."
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING FLUFFY?"
"...I said stuffy, Bakugou."
"WHATEVER OKAY! That's not the freaking point! I just wanted to make sure your online connection was good enough for this old as fuck game. Why did you pick this shit anyways?!"
You could just imagine him in his house, getting all angry over a phone call. You found it highly amusing, mainly because you knew it wasn't that serious.
"It's a childhood favorite of mine," you pouted, crossing your legs on the bed. "It's very near and dear to my heart. You don't like it?"
He sighed. "If you're so fucking dead set on it, then I'm not exactly gonna back down now, am I? I just wanted to make sure this all works perfectly."
"It'll be fiiiiine, Bakugou." You hugged a video game plushie from your bed real tight. "Gee, I didn't realize you cared so much."
"It's my job! Of course I give a shit. I'll make sure this event doesn't flop 'cause of this damn fossil of a game."
"It's not gonna flop!"
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Then day of the event came soon, and both of your fanbases were pretty hyped. The game itself wasn't the only interesting part. No, people were more interested in your clashing personalities.
Since you arrived on the gaming scene, people had jokingly made edits comparing your content to what "Dynamight" had to offer. Your brands were like night and day in difference. They knew from your first post tagging Bakugou that your ensuing interactions were going to be... intriguing, to say the least.
The stream started, with two of the Bakusquad members Kaminari Denki (aka "Chargebolt") and Jirou Kyoka (aka "Earphone Jack") helping with the technical side of things, as well as moderation of your chats. Kaminari oversaw Bakugou's chat, while Jirou oversaw yours. Needless to say, this caused numerous arguments between Bakugou and Kaminari. At least you and Jirou got along well enough despite your difference in aesthetics and Jirou's frustrations with the technical issues.
The first match would be starting soon. For the first three rounds, your arena would be a barren field with a galaxy backdrop. Bakugou specifically chose the plainest arena to best show off your skills and nothing else. You and Bakugou were on an online call together, streamed live to both of your audiences.
"You fucking ready for this, princess?" he asked.
"Only if you're ready for me, prince."
You saw Bakugou smirk wider at your comment through his rarely used onscreen camera. It made you feel in some way you couldn't describe.
Your character was a real firecracker on the field, despite their delicate and sweet-looking appearance. You caught Bakugou's fire-based barbarian character off-guard several times, punishing him every time he thought he could attack you recklessly.
Bakugou let out a stream of expletives, with many new swear words being created on the spot. He caught you laughing and he said, "Don't laugh at me, dammit! I'm not fucking done!"
He attacked viciously but he also learned not to throw his character around willy-nilly. Still, he wasn't a match for you and he couldn't get enough hits in before you threw him off the stage entirely. He tried to leap back up to grab the stage's ledge, but you spiked him straight down. His character died from falling offscreen.
Both your fanbases were going nuts at Bakugou's amateur playstyle. This was the first time he'd been taken off-guard in a fighting game. And it was worse knowing that you were beating him down like a professional MMA fighter beats down a sickly old grandpa on his deathbed. Bakugou was beyond livid, but instead of his earlier rampant boisterous rage, he was now silent and focused and seething.
"Somebody's a little pissed," you crooned into your microphone, your hands gripping your controller as you awaited his character to respawn. "Oh come on, Bakugou, it's not that serious..."
"You won't be saying that when I beat you," he said.
The second round was much worse for you. Bakugou grew much more defensive, and your offensive game was not nearly good enough to avoid retaliatory punishment from his character. You kicked him, he countered you and punched back, sending you flying off the stage to the point where you couldn't leap high enough to reach the arena. Your character fell to their death, somewhere into the beautiful galaxy backdrop.
Bakugou shot a stupidly handsome self-satisfied grin at his camera, and you knew for a fact that it was meant for you.
You sent him a well-trained, super sweet pageant smile that told him, "You are so fucking dead I swear to fucking god once I am done here your character will regret the day he was ever fucking born." Hopefully he got the message.
This was your last round of your first match, and there was no chance in hell you were going to throw the fight away that easily. You glanced at Bakugou's screen to gauge his reaction but he was glancing away from his game, and you wondered if he was looking at you.
The final round started and your characters traded blows like old archnemeses. Your character dashed quick as lightning, but you couldn't get any clean hits on Bakugou's character at all. Bakugou's character hit way, way harder and you struggled to remain on stage every time he sent you flying.
You had to admit, you were impressed. He was literally beating you at your own game. Still, you had dealt enough damage to his character little-by-little that you could tell he was getting nervous.
His barbarian character punched yours so hard he sent you flying, again. You were floating back towards the stage while he awaited you at the ledge.
"Almost fucking done here," he said, his voice almost a growl.
"You gotta tone down that ego of yours," you said, with a smile.
His character swiped at yours but you countered hard, your pink magic shooting him right backwards. Then, your character grabbed him, threw him over the ledge, and kicked him straight into the offscreen abyss.
You shrieked and cheered, bursting into a little happy dance. The chat was going wild seeing Dynamight perform poorly in a fighting game, for the first time. You looked at Bakugou's screen and he wasn't even mad. His back was slumped against his chair and his hand stroked his face, obscuring his true expression. But he was staring at your character's victory animation onscreen very seriously, like he couldn't believe it.
"Holy crap!" Kaminari's voice chimed into the call. "What a match! That's a great way to introduce yourself to someone! I can't believe you two have never collaborated before, we really gotta do this again sometimes because I have never, and I mean never, seen somebody kick Bakugou's ass like that."
"Shut it, Dunce Face."
"Aw come on! The night's still young! How about we play a few more rounds?"
Your eyes flickered to Bakugou's screen, then to your camera. "One more round, Bakugou?"
Bakugou exhaled through his nose. Then, he addressed his camera, his face morphing into a deadly smirk.
"This stream isn't ending until I beat you."
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The stream didn't end for hours.
Bakugou had basically challenged you on your home turf, which was the biggest mistake of his life. You won most of the matches, and although Bakugou did win some, he could only go home happy if he won all of them. And as an unofficial referee, Kaminari would only consider it Bakugou's win if Bakugou won at least a majority of the matches, but Bakugou couldn't manage that either.
You had so much fun that night. You not only fought Bakugou but you also occasionally let Jirou and Kaminari get in on the matches. Other Bakusquad members also poked their head into the streams and joined in at certain points. Even though you had never met these people before, it felt like you were already fast friends.
You already felt incredibly comfortable around Bakugou, maybe even more so than the others. Once the stream ended, the rest of the Bakusquad congratulated you on the good stream but said their quick goodbyes as it was getting late. However, Bakugou stayed up and switched you two to a facetime video call through your computers.
Your heart raced upon seeing him but your face didn't give away any fear. This was very sudden, but you didn't mind witnessing what Bakugou was like in private. A strange feeling bubbled up within you. Meanwhile, Bakugou slumped back in his chair, his head propped up by one fist as he took your appearance in.
"So?" you said, looking playful and coy. "Guess it's not that bad of a game after all. Your viewers were higher with me around."
"Don't get cocky," he said. "Yours were higher than I've ever seen on your channel too."
"My channel?" You spun lightly left and right on your gaming chair. "I didn't realize you were a fan."
Bakugou lips turned up somewhat. "It's obvious that I'd fucking watch your videos before I collaborated with you. Duh. But... I've actually been watching your shit for a while now."
You knew that anybody who gamed with you would likely watch your content, so this wasn't surprising. But for some reason, hearing Bakugou say it put you on the spot, unlike how you indifferent you felt with past gaming partners. Bakugou could've watched any of your videos, even the cringy anime dating sims you played two weeks ago. At least you never played anything inappropriate on your channel...
"So you are a fan," you said, cheekily.
"So fucking what." He looked so irritated by your comment, but you only found his pissy face to be cute. "Yes, I'm a fucking fan. I've been a fan since you fucking started. Happy?"
"Wait, really?" You stopped spinning in your gaming chair. He looked like he regretted saying those words. "Oh my gosh, I would've never guessed if you hadn't told me! Do you put on my videos just to hear my voice? Do you buy all my merch? Do you want some of my gamer girl bath water--"
"Will you stop that?!" His face was a furious shade of red. You wanted to screenshot it so bad but he'd catch you red-handed. "I just said I'm a fucking fan, I didn't say I was delusional."
"You didn't need to," you said with a smile. You pointed at his face on the screen. "It's written all over."
"WHAT?!"
You burst into laughter. He could only stare dumbfounded at his monitor. He grumbled about how you were oh so impossible to deal with, but that didn't wipe the smile off your face.
"Really though, I'm glad..." you said, as your giggles faded away. "I'm always grateful for my fans, Bakubestie."
"Oh you've got nicknames for me now?"
"You're the one that called me 'princess'."
"You don't need to comment on everything I do, alright?" His face was burning brighter again. "Enough about me and all my supposed funny flaws you wanna point out. I wanna talk about you. You a fan of me or what?"
He tried to look cool while saying that. But by the way he leaned on his desk, closer to your screen, you could tell he was really interested in your answer. You backed away from your desk a bit, because his close presence embarrassed you.
"Of course I'm a fan," you said. "Who wouldn't be a fan of 'Dynamight'?"
His face cracked a handsome and cocky grin. "'Course you are." His voice possibly lowered an octave when saying that. "Since you're such a big fan of me, and I'm such a big fan of you, how about we partner up more often?"
He looked confident, but you could see his heart beating fast through his tight shirt.
That made you more confident in turn.
"Yes please, Dynamight."
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rayshippouuchiha · 4 months ago
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I’m thinking of a Full Metal Sky/Canon crossover purely for this interaction
FMS!Tsuna: *Explaining his brothers*
C!Tsuna: I wish I could meet them
FMS!Tsuna: You will. They’re going to come get us
C!Shoich and or Spanner and or Verde and or whatever science nerd: How? You all were brought to our universe via a connection to your counter part by Byakuran. They don’t have any
FMS!Tsuna: As if petty things like the rules of the universe and reality would stop my brothers from doing what they want. Especially if I got dragged into it
The rest of the FMS cast: *Nodding and making agreeing noises*
C!Tsuna: ,,, huh?
Canon is just very very confused and then, behind FMS!Tsuna there's a big crack in the air itself.
Ed big boots his way through the boundaries between universes to get to his brother, Al directly on his heels and carrying the travel pack filled with snacks he started carrying back when all this bullshit started.
Canon is like ????
But then it gets somehow worse because then the FMS!Arco come tumbling out behind Ed too and then it's just pure chaos.
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that1notetaker · 1 year ago
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*throws lore at ye* *throws art at ye* Pspspsps.
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For those interested (and uninterested!), chapter 2 of Blue & Silver has been posted: After offering a winter spirit (not a homeless man), a car ride, Hiccup and Jack hit it off. Considering that the strange lake Hiccup's been dreaming about nonstop is none other than Jack's, they figure have even more in common than they thought. (Sharing a mutual unlove for twilight is just a bonus, really). Now Hiccup is back home and has questions left to answer and perhaps a friend to meet again. Or another in the process. Fortunately, the lake is not that far away.
@imdeadtiredtm and I are co-writing this story, and it's very fun. Well, it also makes my brain hurt at times, but more than that, its fun.
If you're here for what you've actually come for, do enjoy it, but in the case you've never tried reading for this particular side of the internet, hurrowed in a corner, then I definitely recommend it. Think of it like trying Free Samples at the supermarket. We all know its a strategic marketing move to goad off our wallets, but hey! Free samples! At most, you'll lose a laugh or two as you consider what has led you to the point of reading a crack crossover fic of the years 2010, and maybe, you'll stay for the actual content, like that wasn't our plan all along. Case in point: How to train your dragon and rise of the guardians have so much lore and vitality, especially their books; The main characters happen to have an interesting dynamic together, and its nice to uncover it. So yeah! Have fun!
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godspeedviper · 5 months ago
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The Arkham County Jane Doe - Crane x Reader x Hannibal (18+)
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𖀐 Requested by Anonymous: Hi, could you maybe write a fanfic where both Dr. Crane and Hannibal are obsessed with their patient ( maybe in a mental hospital) and actively isolate her from other patients? After she tries to escape, they make it clear they won‘t allow it unless she stays with them in some form. With smut in the end?
𖀐 Type: Oneshot || Hannibal Lecter x Fem!Reader x Jonathan Crane || Smut || Crossover
𖀐 Word Count: 2,605
𖀐 Rating: Explicit || Spitroasting || Manipulation || Obsession || Threesomes || Asylums || Doctor/Patient Relationship
𖀐 A/N: Hope I got this one right! Apologies for taking so long with it, it's been the most challenging request I've written thus far. Thanks for trusting me with it!
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When Hannibal first laid eyes on her, she was standing in a secure hospital room wearing what appeared to be just a men's XL shirt, plain, and some socks, all covered in dried blood and dirt. She was found in a shed on a vast property at the edge of Arkham county, held captive along with two other young women, who had originally gone missing from Franklin, Maryland. However, nothing was known about her in particular. No one had reported her missing, unlike the other two victims, and neither of the two knew her name. Most perplexing of all, she herself claimed to not know her identity either. With the perpetrator still in the wind, it was up to Hannibal to try and coax information from her in hopes of solving the case. She was his patient now. His, and only his. 
  When Jonathan Crane first saw her, she was dressed in a cream colored Arkham Asylum patient uniform – which consisted of a pair of sweatpants, a sweatshirt, matching gripped socks, and a white t-shirt underneath – the standard for all the non high risk patients. She was a puzzle, and he wanted to crack her open and reach inside 
to consume 
to taste 
to know.
  Unfortunately, he would have to be sharing her with the BAU as she potentially held vital information to an open case. He watched as the FBI’s chosen psychiatrist stepped into his office. Dr. Hannibal Lecter was a man unlike any he’s ever encountered. Crane was accustomed to being the apex predator within Arkham’s walls, both amongst staff and patients alike. He didn’t like the confidence with which the other psychiatrist paraded himself around the office like he owned the place. Crane especially didn’t like the bold familiarity with which Dr. Lecter approached his favorite patient. It was far too close for Crane’s comfort. She was his and his alone
 or so he thought. 
“Hello Jane.” Dr. Crane watched, and listened, as Dr. Lecter interacted with his patient through the security footage. 
“Must you call me that?” she replied. 
“Until we can find out your name, yes I’m afraid I will have to call you that.” He smirked and leaned forward, closing the distance between them and obscuring Jonathan’s view of her from the security camera, positioning himself between her and the camera’s line of sight. 
  What a cocky bastard. Crane thought to himself. He took a sip of his coffee and leaned closer to the monitors to get a better look at their interactions. I wonder what he’s afraid of
 Jonathan made a mental note to take some time to customize a batch of fear toxin to use on Dr. Lecter at his earliest convenience. The rest of the session was uneventful to the untrained eye, but Jonathan’s psychiatric expertise compounded with his raging jealousy was causing him to make mountains out of molehills. He spent the remainder of the week visibly distracted as the envy consumed him. He would have to move her to higher security to ensure that any upcoming “sessions” with Dr. Lecter wouldn’t be so cozy. 
  The next time Dr. Lecter met with Jane Doe he had to go past additional security clearances and into a whole other room. This time she was behind a plexiglass window with a phone on the wall, similar to prison visitation. He frowned, surely this was wrong. How could they treat a victim like a prisoner? Like a suspect? The whole objective was to establish rapport and glean insight. How could he when she was now being treated like the people who harmed her? No, this simply wouldn’t do. Hannibal sat down and picked up the phone, his eyes quickly scanning the room to find where the security cameras were situated. 
“Hello again, Miss Doe.” he gave a warm smile and then he leaned in to whisper “I’m going to get you out of here, I promise, but you must do as I tell you.” 
She mouthed a desperate ‘ thank you’ and relaxed her body in relief. 
This only escalated the situation. 
   Hannibal was able to convince Jack Crawford and Co. to plead a case with the Arkham board of directors to reduce security clearance on their Jane Doe. In two weeks he was face to face with the board alongside Dr. Alana Bloom, Dr. Frederick Chilton, and even Jack Crawford himself, all threatening to pursue a transfer closer to Quantico unless they stop treating her as one would a suspect or dangerous patient. Dr. Crane was present at the meeting, and subsequently yielded, only to have her transferred to an entirely new wing of Arkham in a few weeks under the pretense of using alternative treatment methods for her benefit. For months, the two psychiatrists continued to battle for dominance over the case of the Arkham County Jane Doe, to the point that even Freddie Lounds and Vicki Vale caught wind of it. The two journalists began hanging around the asylum trying to interview as many people as possible regarding the situation. Soon it became more than that, writers began flocking in from all over, from the Gotham Gazette to the Daily Planet and even a few true crime youtubers tried to throw their hat into the ring. 
“Why is Arkham Asylum so keen on keeping the FBI out of this case?”
“What is the extent of the BAU’s knowledge on the living Jane Doe?”
“Don’t you think all this back and forth, all this bureaucracy, is just hindering the investigation?” 
“Isn’t this just another dick measuring contest between bureaus to see who can keep the glory?”  
  The two men continued their game of chess – with Jane Doe as their queen, their objective – with laser focus, but alas great minds think alike, and as such it was like trying to fight their own shadow. Both men were incredibly intelligent in more ways than one, and both were more than willing to fight dirty. As their rivalry intensified, so did the cracks, and she knew it would only be a short time before an opportunity presented itself. She was playing them both like a fiddle and not a single person had caught on, not the two doctors in question, nor the rest of the asylum staff, not even the FBI were alerted to her manipulative tactics, and all she had to do was sit back and let them consume each other. All remained on track until the 6th month of her capture, when one of the journalists tried to bribe their way into the asylum. This rang a few alarm bells for Dr. Lecter’s case partner, Will Graham, causing him to confront the doctor with his theory.  
And so Hannibal Lecter set up a very special dinner. 
“What brings you here today Dr. Lecter?” Jonathan Crane tried to feign disinterest, but this was so out of the blue that he couldn’t help his curiosity. He fixed his eyes on the man sitting across from him waiting to catch any minor movements that would aid his understanding of the present situation. Hannibal sat tall in the guest seat in Jonathan’s office, hands folded neatly in his lap, his legs crossed at the ankle below.
“It seems we have a problem.” Hannibal almost purred. 
“We?” replied Crane, raising a brow inquisitively. 
“Yes, it concerns our mutual patient.” Dr Lecter smirked. He let the information sink in and he watched with rapt attention as the mad doctor before him shifted his body from curious, but defensive, to fully alert and open. “I would like to discuss this with you over dinner tonight if that is possible. These walls have ears.”
“Don’t I know it.” Jonathan hummed in agreement. 
  After the journalist’s attempt to break into the asylum, the Arkham County Jane Doe was moved to an extra special cell deep within the bowels of the madhouse. She was given a new set of clothing, bright orange, for the high risk patients. It was for her own safety, they said, but her gut instinct doubted it. The cell was completely padded, it had a bed built into the floor, entirely padded as well, and a small toilet with a minor covering sat in the furthermost corner. It would all be comical if not for the gravity of the situation. She would never escape from here, there wasn’t even a window. An eternity seemed to pass her by in that strange little room before the monotony was broken by the sound of the heavy door being unlocked from the outside. However, she didn’t stir, she remained in the makeshift bed with her back towards the door, she already knew who was about to come in there was no one else it could be. 
“There are very few people within Arkham that even know of this room’s existence.” Said the voice, it was Dr. Crane. “And even fewer still can access it.” 
She could hear the smile in his voice, yet she still refused to turn around. 
“It is a real privilege to be here.” Said a different voice, and this one caused the hairs on the back of her neck to stand on attention. The voice belonged to none other than Dr. Lecter. This time, she almost feared turning around to greet them. 
The heavy door closed behind them, making a sort of suction sound as it sealed shut. Both men stood in front of the door with their hands behind their back and hungry smiles spread on their lips like wolves overlooking helpless prey. She lay there, frozen, unsure of how to react as she began to hear the men pacing around the room, circling her like vultures. The two were entirely in sync, a stark contrast to the rival dynamic they had for the past 6 months. Their voices blended together into one and they even finish each other’s sentences. A malicious alliance. 
“You know, it takes quite a lot to pull the wool over my eyes
” 
“...but to do that to both of us? That takes serious skill.” 
“We’re impressed darling, really, we are.” 
“That’s exactly why we have decided to give you a choice.”
At this, she finally perked up, sitting at the edge of the bed to finally face her two captors. 
“There’s that lovely face.” Said Jonathan with a cheeky smile. 
“What are my options?” she asked. 
“You can stay here at Arkham, under strict surveillance until the brass solves the case and figures out what to do with you.” Jonathan then turned to look at Hannibal, who spoke without missing a beat. 
“Or you can give us some information, and we will then take care of you
 If you wish." His smile was hungry and wolfish. 
“And what must I do to earn your good side?” she asked, there was something missing in this whole equation. “You two wouldn’t go through all this trouble just to offer me this for nothing in return.” 
  The pair of psychiatrists stepped forward, flanking her on each side, each man looking like a mirror image of each other. Both tall, lean, with stark chiseled features and stoic expressions that revealed nothing and everything all at once. Without warning, Hannibal sat down on the bed beside her and pressed his mouth to her throat, worshiping her soft skin with his lips. Jonathan eagerly joined in, resting his head on her shoulder and mirroring the other’s actions on her throat. She gasped in surprise and then straightened her back, lengthening her neck, and leaning into the action as much as her body would allow. She felt a hand grab her inner thigh, pulling her legs apart, while another slipped under the top of her asylum uniform, sliding up her torso and reaching for her tender breast. Her head lolled back and her eyelids fluttered as her skin grew hot. She heard them speak but she could no longer tell who was who, it was as if the three of them were slowly melting into one. 
“We’ve seen how you look at us.” 
“Surely you must’ve been anticipating intimacy with at least one of us.”
“You were going to seduce us, and now we get to seduce you.” 
A rhythm was soon established, set by the frantic beating hearts and breathy wanton moans. The whole room seemed to almost pulsate with energy as the sexual tension was ratcheted up exponentially. The ebb and flow was abruptly stopped by three simple words. 
“I want you.”
Even she was taken aback by the sound of her own voice, let alone her choice of words.
“Which one?” came the reply.
“Both.”
  Neither psychiatrist wasted any time in disrobing their patient, any regard for professionalism or ethics had been left outside this door along with their dignity. In this room, they were all mad. Despite their haste, she felt as if nothing would ever be fast enough to quench this burning desire in her core. Once fully nude she lay back on the bed, eagerly waiting to be taken advantage of. Both men were visibly hungry and hard. Their hands moved on instinct alone as neither could tear their eyes away from the nude figure before them, she captivated their attention like hypnosis, they were powerless in her grasp, she who manipulated them both and preyed upon their competitive jealousy for her own benefit. Freeing his member from his slacks, Hannibal ruthlessly grabbed the back of her head with one hand and his length in the other. She salivated at the sight and wrapped her lips around the head. She could just barely hear him curse beneath his breath in another language. Suddenly, Dr. Crane’s hand grabs onto her hip, pushing her up onto the bed on all fours. Once in position, he got up behind her and spread her thighs, using his hand to guide himself into her from behind. She whimpered against Hannibal’s cock in her mouth as she felt Crane spear her open. The warm ache of being stretched by him simply spurred her on. She slowly widened her jaw, taking Hannibal deep while Crane set a punishing pace. Hannibal gripped a fistful of her hair while Jonathan grabbed onto her hips with both hands. 
  The heavily cushioned room acted as soundproofing, muffling the lewd sounds of flesh against flesh and desperate, animalistic moans as the trio selfishly chased after their own orgasms. The fact that she was fully nude while both men were still clothed made her blush all over. She belonged to them both, and each man stood his claim. Her throat tightened around Hannibal’s cock as she tried to scream. She was utterly overwhelmed, her mounting orgasm causing her to rock back against Jonathan’s hips in search of that sweet release. It didn’t take long before she was seeing stars, but neither man had relented. The overstimulation was beginning to ache and she was reduced to a twitching, whimpering mess. 
“No no,” She heard them say. “You owe us this. You played us, and now it’s our turn to have fun.” 
The sweet torture did not last much longer, and she soon felt Dr. Crane coating her insides with his own release. He shakily bucked against her as he finished, paralyzed by pleasure, he let himself grow soft inside her. Dr. Lecter came soon after, spilling his seed down her throat and holding her head flush against him, forcing her to obediently swallow it all. 
“Good girl.” He gasped. 
“We’ll take good care of you.” Said Jonathan.
“You won’t want for anything.” Added Hannibal. 
She merely nodded in agreement, accepting whatever terms as long as it meant safety and pleasure in their arms. 
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Ao3 || Guidelines || WiPs || Ko-Fi
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roleplay-abiogenesis2 · 2 years ago
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... Okay, Cyno can at least see the logic behind the original intent of this mess. But the sight of the flames quickly spreading from the basket to start biting on the wallpaper and wooden panels of the expensive upper floors of ShinRa HQ urged him to reach a new conclusion rather quickly.
"You seem to have omitted the next step of this operation. Unless the building is part of what you'd consider 'waste'."
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"It's called disposing of confidential waste." Cue Genesis ever-so-casually setting the waste paper basket on fire.
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thatoneidiotyoulovesomuch · 14 days ago
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I think it's so funny how much Danny's personality changes when people put him in fanfics.
This is coming from someone who only reads My Hero Academia x Danny Phantom crossover fics so this could be unique to that specific subcategory.
But I get whiplash on how people write him. In fanfics, he always seems to be this ticking time bomb and who is kinda angry and on edge all the time. Who has that whole protect obsession. (Which I don't really like at all, but that's not what this post is about) who cracks jokes sometimes but it's not that often
I guess it's a more realistic depiction because of all Danny's trauma it's still startling though because I still watch Danny Phantom every once in a while.
And in the show he's pretty laid back when he's not hunting ghost and even when he's fighting he's cracking jokes and stuff. What's especially jarring though is in the show Danny doesn't really help out fellow bullied kids. He's often like "dang that sucks at least Dash isn't after me though!"
I just think it's funny.
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thestalwartheart · 3 months ago
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La la la-la la la la, he's a little bit Alexis Bond.
For Mads, who threw this idea into the universe like it wasn't the most cosmic-brained crossover of all time, and for @non-compos-mentis-nimbus who sent me the prompt "a particularly interesting/weird ringtone." (I'm so sorry if you've never watched Schitt's Creek!).
Fic behind the cut. It's nothing but crack, I must warn you! And yes, you can read this on AO3, though I'm not sure it needs to be preserved for the internet's eternity!
“Christ,” Q groaned, in the panic of a morning rush. “Where the hell is my phone?”
Beside him in bed, with a pillow bunched under his head, looking every inch the layabout, Bond smirked. “Well, you were so quick to shed your clothes last night, darling—”
Q held out a hand to shush him. He was disastrously hungover. He didn’t need to be subjected to this sort of insubordination at seven in the morning.
“If you have something useful to say, say it. Otherwise, be quiet.”
Bond tutted. While he sat up, he subjected Q to a lecture on manners. Perhaps Q had been born too late for elocution lessons to be the done thing in his childhood, he said, but that was no excuse for a lack of common courtesy, especially towards a man who only last night had acquiesced to every filthy thought—
Q stopped listening. He rummaged around in his bedside drawer.
“— to call it?”
“Hm?”
Bond let out a huff of amusement. “Your phone. Shall I call it for you?”
“Oh, yes. Fine. Thank you.”
It would be fair to say that Q wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders. Perhaps if he hadn’t missed his alarm or drunk quite so much gin last night—martinis were never a good decision, least of all ones made by James Bond—he might have taken precautions. As it were, he was bleary-eyed, a bit stressed and, frankly, exhausted from a long night of Bond pummelling him into the mattress.
Without warning, Bond pressed the call button on his phone.
La la la-la la la la—
“Oh, shit,” said Q. The ringtone came blasting from his rumpled suit, which had landed in the doorway sometime last night. Hours ago. Hours and hours and hours—
Q made a beeline for it, stumbling over the bedsheets and then himself.
“Q.”
His hand delved into the wrong trouser pocket. “Oh, balls!”
—hide your diamonds, hide your exes—
“Q.”
The other pocket was empty, too. Q nearly tore his jacket apart searching. Its two external pockets contained a pen, three folded post-it-notes, an Oyster card, the key to his work desk and an errant Percy Pig. But no phone.
I’m a Prada handbag—
No, his phone was in an internal pocket (the second one he checked, naturally — when did anything ever go smoothly in a crisis?), and Q grasped at it with the desperation of a found-out mistress, declining the call with a quick couple of taps on its side button.
“What was that I just heard?” asked Bond, seeming far more awake than he’d been five minutes ago. “A naughty elf?”
Q winced. His headache was suddenly the least painful thing in the room.
“I’m not sure you want to know.”
“Oh,” replied Bond with a dangerous, only half flirtatious glint in his eye. “I think I do.”
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jedineedlove · 2 months ago
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Black Myth Wukong Crossover with Lego Monkie Kid
SPOILERS: BLACK MYTH WUKONG WATCH OR PLAY BEFORE READING!!!!!
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On AO3 I have seen a crossover, It's pretty good.
But I had another idea. What if the Wukong of LMK is a Chosen One, that has absorbed the six senses of the previous Sun Wukong. Maybe that is why he acts so young because he is actually young. The thought of the Crew and especially Macaque finding out the Wukong they have come to know now is someone else that holds the memories. Maybe this Choicen One has dedicated so much to filling in the lost spot of the old Sun Wukong while also trying to not make the same mistakes as The Old Wukong did that he acts like "he" never left like he is simply atoning for the past deeds. Maybe the memories he gained from the old Wukong consumed him so that he felt he must atone for the past sins. So much so he cries and feels anger for what the previous Sun Wukong did, so much so that he never corrects them on the fact he is not the same Wukong. Taking on the old Monkey King's name he feels the sense of responsibility to take on all the title initials like the expectation of the goofy jokester, the responsible mentor that the mortals and demons expect of him. Maybe he also hides the fact that he is not the Wukong they know because it will show weakness to hid that existence of the Sages Relics that can give great power to those who hold it. Of course, not all the enemies of Black Myth Wukong will be playing the role like they did in the game due to the show The Bull family won't have their fight and Bull will not have been holding one of the relics.
To be honest you can play with the hows and whys but the thought can really be taken anywhere you want. I have no intent on making a fic of this i already am busy with my own but if anyone wants to take a crack it be my guest. ;)
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