#especially as a person who struggled with feeling deserving in my relationships

[can-i-get-a-yippee]

If I see one more take about how Eddie doesn’t deserve Buck bc he has trauma, I’m gonna lose my mind.

Isn’t love to see all the worst parts of someone and love them anyway? To sit beside them at their lowest point and give whatever comfort you can, knowing that they would do the same? Isn’t love to acknowledge the good and the bad that makes up each person and accept it wholeheartedly because love isn’t just the good parts?

And healing isn’t linear. It never has been.

Do you give up on someone because they relapse or regress? Do you throw away your relationship and your emotions because they’re no longer the perfectly healed partner you expected?

Like, people can dislike Buddie. I don’t care, but this narrative that you have to be worthy of someone’s love annoys me to no end bc the beauty of love is it’s not supposed to be expected or deserved — when you truly love someone it’s given without conditions.

[malusokay]

5 Classics for girly girls 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Emily of New Moon

The bittersweet process of growing up and finding where you truly belong... The perfect read for the start of a new school year. After her father’s death, Emily Starr is sent to live with her snobbish relatives at New Moon farm. Thrust into an unfamiliar and often cold environment, Emily faces numerous challenges. However, as time passes, she begins to adapt and discovers the beauty in her surroundings. With the support of her new friends—Teddy, Perry, and Ilse—Emily not only finds solace but also discovers her own creative talents, helping her carve out a place for herself in this new chapter of her life.

“If it's IN you to climb you must -- there are those who MUST lift their eyes to the hills -- they can't breathe properly in the valleys.”

Jane Eyre

A true classic for all my fellow gothic-lit enthusiasts, Jane Eyre, reminds us that everyone deserves a love that consumes, challenges, and transforms the very core of your being, offering both profound joy and deep heartache (we love a good situationsship). Following Jane Eyre, an orphaned and mistreated girl who endures a harsh upbringing but grows into a strong, independent woman. As she takes a position as a governess at Thornfield Hall, she encounters the enigmatic Mr. Rochester, sparking a profound and tumultuous romance. Their intense connection is marred by secrets and personal demons, revealing the complexities of their relationship.

“Jane, be still; don't struggle so like a wild, frantic bird, that is rending its own plumage in its desperation." "I am no bird, and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being, with an independent will; which I now exert to leave you.”

The Secret Garden

Mary Lennox, a spoiled and neglected girl, is sent to live with her uncle after the death of her parents. Initially ill-tempered and withdrawn, Mary’s curiosity is sparked by rumours of a hidden, abandoned garden on the estate. As she explores and begins to restore this secret garden, she experiences a beautiful shift (glow-up era). The once gloomy and sickly Mary starts to bloom alongside the garden, rediscovering happiness, vibrancy, and a sense of belonging, making the story a heartwarming tale of growth and recovery.

“At first, people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then they begin to hope it can be done, then they see it can be done--then it is done, and all the world wonders why it was not done centuries ago.”

Pride and Prejudice

Truly a classic that has shaped my romantic expectations hahah... Elizabeth Bennet battles societal expectations and her own misjudgments in 19th-century England. When the aloof Mr Darcy (he'd totally be a ghoster in the 21st century just saying...) first crosses her path, their initial encounters are fraught with tension and misunderstanding. However, as Elizabeth delves deeper, she uncovers the complexities of Darcy’s character and her own heart.

“I could no longer help saying that I loved him. I loved him not only for his sake but for his own sake. I loved him because he was the only person who had ever really loved me for myself. I loved him because he had made me feel that I was worthy of being loved.”

The Little Prince

A young, otherworldly prince from a tiny planet travels across the universe, meeting various inhabitants and learning profound life lessons. His journey brings him to Earth, where he encounters a stranded pilot and shares his reflections on love, loss, and the essence of human connections. Through whimsical adventures and encounters, The Little Prince explores the importance of seeing with the heart rather than the eyes and reminds us of the value of friendship and innocence.

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched; they are felt with the heart.”

you guys asked for more academia/book stuff so I thought this might be a nice start, especially since I know that many of you are just getting into classics; these are all very much suitable for beginners!! <3

love ya ･:*₊‧✩

[velvetcrimsonkisses]

Blind Gojo adjusting to his new life…

The fight against Sukuna took a lot from everybody. With everyone making sacrifices, it was only right Satoru did too. He wanted to win, he was the strongest right? He had to win, no matter what. Losing the six eyes was just the mere cost of winning the battle. It was worth it right?

Satoru believed he didn’t deserve to live, but he had too now for everyone who died. Ultimately, deciding to now live his life as Satoru Gojo and not "the strongest” anymore. Losing the six eyes initially lead to frustration and anger, as he tried to adjust to being blind. He felt useless for a while, not being as efficient as he was. But over time, this loss lead to his personal growth. Gojo developed a deeper sense of humility and empathy for others, finally understanding the struggles of those who are not as gifted as he once was.

It wasn’t until he met you that he started to feel a sense of normalcy. And here he was at almost 30 learning how to live as a human for the first time. You taught him what true genuine love was and you patiently taught him how to reciprocate it back to you. He learned how to express his feelings to you instead of bottling them up inside. You created a safe space for him where he could unveil the true side of himself. Trust and intimacy forming between you two. Both of you navigating the complexities of loving each other.

He also didn’t know exactly what you looked like, not that he cared. His other senses were still in top shape and keen allies to him. That’s why his hands are always on you, he could feel you. Feeling the warmth of your body against his fingertips, large cold hands always coming to your face. He liked tracing your bone structure with the pads of his fingers, caressing your cheeks, and especially savoring your lips against his own. With each caress, he discovered new assets of your beauty, not defined by your visual appearance but by the sensations that awakened within him.

He could also smell your scent. He knows when you walk into a room when the sweetness of your perfume fills his nostrils, causing it to twitch like a bunny. He buries his nose into your hair because he loves the fresh fragrance of your shampoo. He loves when you bake him all his favorite sweets, the aroma of brown sugar lingering on you makes you smell even sweeter.

The sound of your voice. Satoru could never get tired of it. For once in his life, Satoru found himself not being the talkative one in a relationship. He cherished all the words that would leave your lips, each word a symphony to his ears. In the mornings Satoru would always lay in bed until you woke up waiting for the sound of your voice to be the first thing he heard each day.

All these aspects combined Satoru knew he was finally living the life he finally dreamed of. Every touch, every word, every moment was filling his deepest desires. In your presence, he found the reason why he deserved to live. He found peace and joy, a sense of completeness that he had long yearned for all in one person.

Even though he couldn't see anymore he felt things he didn’t before. He made up his mind that he didn't want to waste any more time. Satoru was now certain that his blindness didn’t stop his ability to love or to commit fully to you and he was more than grateful that you showed him that. It wasn’t long before you both decided to marry.

“She’s perfect…” you utter softly, handing the baby gently into an anxious Satoru’s arms. He cradles the baby just like you taught him, careful to not get too excited and accidentally hurt her. The baby babbles as she feels the comforting warmth of her father.

“The little sounds she makes are my favorite thing to hear,” he says, poking the baby’s cheek. “Describe her again to me, will you?” Satoru looks up from the baby, trying to decipher where you were.

You walk over to join him on the couch. “Of course, she has your beautiful blue eyes…” You noticed Satoru smiling, still holding his daughter close to him. “And your white hair…” you continue, Satoru’s finger coming up to her head, feeling the softness in her hair.

You describe every detail you could about the little baby to Satoru. You tell him about how her eyes seem to gaze into his soul full of love, and the way her tiny nose wrinkles when she sleeps just like his. A lone tear falls down Satoru's face, filled with heartache knowing that he will never be able to see her with his own eyes.

In that vulnerable moment, you hold Satoru close, letting him know that you were there. He smiles at you as he feels your touch, sniffling. There was determination in Satoru’s eyes. He was going to cherish every moment with his family.

"I'll be there for both of you," Satoru whispers, his voice filled with quiet resolve. His words carry a promise.

Thank you @suguwife for this lovely idea and the discord server as well!

[hyunebunx]

Wow I’m stupid I pressed send way too fast 🩵 with Lee Know??

˖˙ ᰋ ── 🩵 - kissing in the rain with Minho

﹙ʚɞ˚﹚. genre: a teeny tiny amount of angst but it has a happy ending

﹙ʚɞ˚﹚. a/n: thank you sm for requesting!!! <3 i had soo many ways of writing this in my head that i struggled lol. i really hope you like what i came up with. it's loosely (very) based on the rain scene in pride and prejudice so enjoy!! <33

Arguments were not a usual occurrence in your relationship. Most of the time you managed to settle any disagreement before it could escalate to such heights, the perfectly communicating couple all of your friends couldn’t help but feel a little envious of.

Now was not one of those times; your stress and emotions were getting the best of both you and Minho in the most unpleasant way. You hated arguing with him, getting angry and unable to see the other’s point of view, clouded by the desire to be right and make each other understand where you were coming from.

“You don’t get it.” Minho shakes his head with a sigh, forearms resting on the wheel as the rain poured outside your safe haven, hitting the windshield at an alarming pace and preventing you from seeing anything, even with the headlights on.

“Explain it to me, then!” You bite back, body facing his in the heated passenger seat that was keeping you warm and cozy despite the chill outside. Even when arguing you could admit Minho was the most considerate person alive – you didn’t ask him to turn on the heat, he must have done it when he noticed you trembling like a leaf after getting in.

He surprised you after work, dropping by and driving directly to one of your favorite restaurants just in time for dinner and a well deserved date night. Everything was perfect, the location, the food, and especially the company, laughing and having a great time with the love of your life.

Until things turned sour on your drive home, and what started as a silly disagreement turned into a full-on argument about something you didn’t find significant enough even to remember.

“That’s what I’ve been doing for the past ten minutes but it seems you don’t want to listen!”

You’ve been walking (or driving) in circles, with him getting frustrated and you following right on his tail until the car came to a stop right in front of your apartment building.

It’s not like you didn’t want to listen or care to hear him out, it’s just that Minho seemed to make something out of nothing, insisting and pushing forth the same idea like you were nothing more than a child who lacked basic comprehension. It was frustrating and exhausting, especially after the long day you’ve had.

“Min, I’ve been listening.” You try to smooth things over, warm hand landing on his thigh comfortingly. “Just because I’m not giving you the answers you want doesn’t mean I’m not hearing you.”

Minho remains silent, head turned the other way to stare out the window and not acknowledge your presence. When the silence stretches on, you give up with a sigh and retract your hand, reaching for your purse in the backseat and opening the car door in the same breath.

“What are you – “ You close it right before he can finish the sentence, set on getting inside with or without him to finally take the bubble bath you’ve been daydreaming about all day at work.

“Kitten!” His voice follows a moment later, the sound of the car door slamming louder than him amongst the deafening rain. “Y/n!”

Despite yourself and the insanity of spending even one more minute in this storm, you stop and allow him to catch up, not protesting as his warm hands land on your shoulders and turn you around almost desperately.

“Where are you going? We are not done talking.” He states, dark hair and clothes getting soaked at an alarming pace as the rain spares neither of you.

“But I am!” You exhale, the chill settling into your bones. “We won’t reach an agreement like this so let’s just stop!”

His eyes widen as he pulls you closer, chest to chest, figures illuminated by the bright headlights almost blinding. “Baby, wait – “

“I hate fighting with you, Min.” Without meaning to, you interrupt him once again, reaching up to cup his face and drag him closer. “I’m sorry, okay? We can talk this over calmly inside after we cool down. Just not like this, please, I can’t do it anymore.”

He nods instantly, agreeing without a doubt and most likely seeing his faults too, and not only yours. Then, when you expect him to let go and finally follow you in, Minho surprises you the second time tonight by leaning over and connecting your lips in a kiss full of passion and love, reminding you once again that the heart in his chest beats first and foremost for you. His upper limbs cling to your body just like your clothes, hugging you tightly while your hands squeeze his face affectionately, a smile sneaking past and pulling one from him as well, on the verge of beaming into the kiss.

The rain seems to disappear, the cold too, like you weren’t bothered by either in the first place. Minho has that effect on you, helping you see the good in every situation. Sure, the location was not ideal – nothing could be less romantic than a barely lit parking lot – but as always, the company mattered more. And the message he was trying to send. When words failed you, actions worked better, speaking louder and getting your point across without much effort.

Sure, the argument wasn’t resolved but you both managed to make the other understand what mattered the most. You might be disagreeing now, momentarily stuck in a small pothole along the way, but you still loved each other, you would get over it and be okay in the end.

Because that’s what true love meant. Getting through things together and continuing to walk down your joined paths, hand in hand, no matter how many potholes or rough patches you encounter. A small setback won’t ever erase your feelings for each other, or make you forget all the beautiful moments you’ve shared.

And maybe, just maybe, a kiss was all you needed to finally understand Minho’s point when you sat down and resolved things that night. He, on the other hand, needed a few more to be satisfied.

[vivmaek]

ASTROLOGY OBSERVATIONS PART EIGHT (positive vibes only <3)

This was originally going to be another roast. But tbh, my heart has been feeling heavy the past few months. I'm sure some of you can relate, especially with all the events currently occurring in our world. So, I decided to focus on what I love most about certain placements in an effort to spread a little positivity.

✿ Aries Moons stand up and fight for the people they care about. They won’t let their friends be belittled within their presence, they have your back. They’re the first to speak out on injustice and will take action to make things right. 

❀ People who have Gemini in the 8th house ask questions that matter. They invoke deep thoughts within other people and are unafraid to explore topics that are uncomfortable or taboo. 

✿ Those who have a Moon Sextile Venus aspect know how to make others feel loved. They pay attention to their loved ones, and give each and every one of them the special attention that they deserve. These people are relationship builders. 

❀ Libra Venus, how does it feel to be god's favorite? These types invoke good feelings in other people. They’re so sweet and have hearts of gold. Good friends and romantic companionships are easy for them to find because their affection comes from a place of authenticity. 

✿ People with Saturn in the 7th house wait for what's right for them. They take their commitments seriously and don’t play around with people's feelings. They respect their romantic partners. Their firm boundaries lead to successful relationships. 

❀ Walking earth angels have a Sun trine Neptune aspect. They have a divine presence and they don’t get tied up within their own ego. People look to them for spiritual guidance. They uplift the souls of others. 

✿ Aquarius Mercurys aren’t afraid to evoke controversy. Sometimes this is needed in the world. If there's an elephant in the room, they’ll point out the obvious. They formulate their own unique thoughts, and are not easily influenced. 

❀ People who have their Moon placed within the 4th house know how to make a home. As someone who was raised by a person with this placement, I truly reaped the benefits of this. They keep family traditions alive, or even start new ones. They understand the importance of family and act as the glue that holds everything together. 

✿ Those who have a Uranus trine Ascendant aspect make life more interesting. Without them, the world would be a boring place. There is no one like them, and they cannot be replaced. Their quirky nature is endearing. They are such a breath of fresh air. 

❀ Taurus Mercurys are so level headed that it has a calming effect upon the people who surround them. They take things slow and are not quick to jump to conclusions. Within group projects or endeavors, they are at the heart of it. People can depend on them. 

✿ People who have Uranus in the 10th house prove to others that you can lead an unconventional life and still find success. They don’t follow the rules, and don’t rely on tradition for stability. They inspire others through their free spirit. 

❀ When someone has a Venus sextile Saturn aspect within their birth chart, they make relationships that last a lifetime. These people are loyal friends and they know how to maintain the longevity of a relationship. They show up for people when needed and they never make a promise that they can’t keep. 

✿ People with a Gemini Venus teach other people how to have fun within relationships. They love innocently and there are no strings attached. They make their friends and loved ones feel like a kid again when in their presence. Their lighthearted approach to love is comedic, they live life as if it were a rom-com. 

❀ Cancer 1st housers are quiet leaders. They approach life with a healthy level of confidence. As a leader, they still treat their subordinates with the respect they deserve. They don’t forget about the little people, and are attentive to people who are struggling. 

✿ A Saturn trine Neptune aspect allows the native to grow significantly when faced with opposition and challenge. They understand the importance of spiritual lessons, and go out of their way to right their wrongs. They don’t lose sight of what they’re working towards, and won’t lose their sense of morality once they achieve success. 

❀ Libra Moons remind people how important it is to incorporate pleasure into life. Working hard means nothing if you don’t stop and appreciate the benefits you’ve gained. Having an appreciation for the little things doesn't mean they’re materialistic. 

✿ Uranus 7th houses maintain independence within relationships and don’t lose sight of who they are. They are not going to change who they are just so a relationship can function. They march to the beat of their own drum, you can dance to the music or move along. 

❀ People with a Mercury trine Ascendant aspect bring humor into this world. Of course, they’re incredibly smart and their academic skills are impressive. However, they still don’t take themselves too seriously and are full of witty remarks. They share the best memes and are always in the know. 

[sol-iscus]

Honestly, Arcane needed at least another act to close it properly. There was just.....too much going on. Jinx's ending ground my gears and the way that Vi just.....seems to move on. Bro,that's the baby sister you sat through nearly a decade of psychological and physical trauma to get back to. Her reaction should have been way more visceral. If Vi developed alcoholism over her situationship going south, her sister (and dad!) going out like that should have had her thoroughly crashing out.

Ekko and Mel......now that was personal. They really gave them the Magical Negro™ treatment and no explanation for it. And oh boy, am I tired of it. I hate the narrative of black characters having to self-sacrifice for people who would not do the same for them. Could you imagine being fucked with by something like the Arcane or LeBlanc for allegedly a year or so,just to immediately go to war the moment you're back in normal surroundings? Do they get a break at all?

THANK YOU ANON for describing how myself and my friend both feel about this (we’re both poc)

I’m also upset at how minimized Vi and Ekko’s relationship is, especially with ekko thinking Vi was dead in season 1, and we only get one more interaction between them both this season. And Ekko is just….so lonely after he has suffered great losses as well, ESPECIALLY after seeing all that he did back in the alternate timeline and remaining selfless to save those he loves back in his timeline.

Ekko, Mel, and Sevika deserved SO MUCH better as well and way more screen time to do their stories justice. Things happened way too conveniently and too quickly. I’m also struggling to understand how Mel managed to control her powers the way she did at the last moment.

Vi absolutely should have crashed out. I wanted her to go find Ekko and talk to him, at this point they both need each other because they’re family too.

Honorable mention, Ambessa. I have…..feelings about that whole thing.

[alexthebordercollie]

it's nice to see mystery trio aus that aren't fiddlestan tbh. The amount of times I'll see one, think it looks interesting, and then it just turns into "wow Stan, you're so much nicer and cooler than your lame brother! Lets date!" And act like it's some kind of karma for Ford or something.

I definitely agree with your take that so often fiddlestan is just used as a way to express dislike of Ford, while ignoring any of Stan's canonical flaws

As a side note, since this is more of personal headcanon territory, but i think Stan would find Fiddleford too reminiscent of Ford when he was young to actually be interested.

Anyway, i always love to see Stan in his natural habitat (being a chaotic uncle)

I love the idea of the Mystery Trio. I think these three would play off each other really well. They're cute and funny together, but you don't need Fiddlestan. It feels like people treat it as a given that if offered the choice between Stan and Ford Fidds would choose Stan. Which is kind of shitty. (Low key it kind of reads to me like Ford is assumed the worse partner because he's autistic :/ even if people aren't consciously treating him that way.)

I think it's kind of presumptuous to assume Fidds would be into Stan anyway. Like physically attracted to him? Sure, obviously. If he finds Ford attractive odds are good Stan would also be nice to look at, but relationships aren't just physical attraction and it's obvious from the journals and BOB that Fidds had a very strong connection to Ford. If he's in love with an autistic nerd enough to throw his life away for him why would people assume Stans's wildly contrasting personality would somehow be more appealing?

I've actually had this comic kicking around in my mind for a while and this ask gave me a good excuse to draw it. (Though it took longer than expected)

While I don't think Fidds would ever choose Stan over Ford, I do think Ford would be a bit of a jealous and insecure partner. He's used to a lot of social rejection and struggles to maintain connections with people. Not to mention trust issues, especially after Bill who tried to sabotage his faith in Fiddleford in particular.

I wouldn't put it past Ford to get antsy seeing Fidds get along with his brother even if there's absolutely nothing going on there.

Also, I hadn't considered the suggestion that Stan might find Fidds nerdiness a turn-off because it reminds him too much of his brother, but yeah I could see it. Still, I'd buy Stan being interested in Fidds before I could really see the other way around happening. I think Stanley's tastes are bit broader but Fiddleford I imagine to have a bit more of a type. At least where romantic attraction is concerned. That said I don't think Fiddleford's actual tastes are really considered, I think he gets shipped with Stanley by people who want to see Stanley get that kind of overbearing love that Fidds showed to Ford. I do understand wanting to give him that kind of partner but Ford deserves love too, we don't need to be taking his healthy romantic option away from him and leave him with Bill. (His abuser.)

[severinewrites]

Finding Independence Without Love

Musings of independence with the absence of love feat. Moominvalley

Dependency is common in some relationships and could happen in both platonic and romantic relationships. We see our partners/friends as a source of happiness every time we feel down. Our clinginess strengthens when we have a special person in our lives, thinking of them as a person without flaws or perfect. This can be an unhealthy way of how we act or think in our relationships with other people, we can’t expect they’ll satisfy our needs immediately, it’s like you are viewing them as the top of our pedestal, admiring them a lot.

I am saying this from my perspective as a young adult, I’ve experienced the first time feeling disappointed in my ex-crush when I hear he likes someone else. It hurts a lot to hear from the person you’ve admired for so long like someone other than you, I mean, it’s a universal experience, right? Getting disappointed or rejected, you start to get mad at yourself like hitting, pulling your hair, or even slapping yourself for not getting chosen, you feel like an idiot for being delusional thinking you’re the “one” for them. It’s a tragic feeling, I know—but I tried to forget about them, not as a friend but as a “crush”.

During my Christmas break, I struggled to cope with my feelings, so I doomscrolled YouTube for 10-12 hours for 3 days straight without reaching out to someone because I needed to isolate myself from what happened, trying to forget it ever happened. Then, I stumbled upon a show called “Moominvalley” on my for you page, I decided to watch the clips, and guess what? I fell in love with it quickly even though it’s been 3 days since I knew about this show. Moominvalley is a comforting show, and what intrigued me about the show is the character Snufkin, an easygoing and carefree enjoys thinking about things and always comes and goes as he pleases, going on adventures. Like Snufkin, I enjoy solo trips, I'm not a big fan of trips with my friends (depends on my mood but I prefer solo to groups) since I do treasure my alone time a lot, able to think about stuff or explore everywhere without any people around trying to drain my energy emotionally and physically. With my solo trips, I'm able to reflect on many stuff without any distractions. Just because I enjoy being alone doesn't mean I don't feel lonely… I have friends who care about me a lot—including my ex-crush but despite them being overall supportive and approachable, I can't help but try to push them away from me—isolating myself, especially what happened between my ex-crush and me, I can't face them anymore something that leads me to isolate myself from them and my friends, not wanting help or comfort from them anymore. I shut myself from them, I don't want to make things complicated. Snufkin really relates toMoninn on a deeper level, making him my kin since he does push away friends, has abandonment issues, fears getting attached, is sad on the inside, and struggles to talk/chat with someone.

Through the show Moominvalley, I’ve learned the hard way that even the people you deeply love and admire, you need to accept that you can’t control how they feel or act, because well… they are humans, right? They deserve to feel or act what they want, even having feelings for somebody they like, even if it’s not you. It’s sad because that person made you feel alive or wanted, through the physical touch, words of affirmation, and more—makes me so special to them. Maybe that’s the reason why I fell in love with them in the first place. This also relates to the relationship between Moominttoll and Snufkin, Moominroll being clingy and a bit obsessed to Snufkin makes him admire him because of his adventures but unlike Snufkin, he tries to avoid any attachment to Moomintroll, resulting him to leave everytime to get some alone time or to isolate himself in his adventures. Moomintroll is also one of the characters I've kinned too, him being so clingy towards Snufkin reminds how I acted towards my ex-crush but not as obsessive, just right. Moomintroll has longings for Snufkin, always wanting to be in his side everytime, like how I've wanted to be in my ex-crush's side whenever I have a chance too—but sadly they found someone they always want to be close with… I'm glad for them but I tend to feel lonely without them around, yearning for some message or conversation from them—nothing is the same anymore as before… but that's life, there will be changes, whether you like it or not.

Therefore, I still need time for myself and watch more Moominvalley to find my purpose in life outside heartbreaks. Even I would love to talk/chat with them, it’s time to use this vacation to take a break from them for a while, giving myself time to grow as an independent person—not needing their comfort or help and focusing on my passion for writing, like what I am doing right now. Sometimes, we need to depend on ourselves, without needing anyone to fix us. That's what I did to cope.

To end this, I would like to add a quote from Moominvalley from the character Snufkin, he once said:

“You can't ever be really free if you admire somebody too much.” - Snufkin (Moominvalley 2019)

This quote explains we can't really be free if we admire that special person too much, draining your energy mentally and emotionally. I wish I've heard this show during my childhood then I wouldn't have to deal with heartbreaks all of the sudden. But I guess things happen for a reason. Moominvalley is truly a masterpiece, especially the creator itself Tove Jansson, the one responsible for making this beautifully crafted show for us to love and enjoy, making us learn meaningful lessons.

We humans seek longing, wanting be loved by that person we admired but I know we're better than that—I’m better than that anyways! We know that those people we love are humans too, so why waste our time waiting for approval from them? We could try to look after ourselves and be a independent with or without them—needing no love from them at all! Love can wait but not with hopes and dreams, our passions in life are much more important than some hopeless romance. We don't need that person we deeply admire to take over our lives, we should move forward and never look back! It's such a shame not to take a chance to do what you're passionate about when we only live once.

With Moominvalley, It's possible for us to grow to independent individuals thriving to make the world a better place! With my strong love for writing, I could write freely, writing down my musings, feelings, and emotions. I’m grateful to be alive where the world is filled with endless possibilities, where you can be free from everything! Be who you want to be, explore everything until you find your purpose—that’s the beauty of independence without love!

“It is simply this: do not tire, never lose interest, never grow indifferent—lose your invaluable curiosity and you let yourself die. It's as simple as that.” - Tove Jansson (Fair Play 1989)

[drphonestre]

Jimmy | Psychological analysis of Mouthwashing's protagonist

Reminder: this analysis is based on my knowledge of psychology and on the sources I have seen in my studies (Psychanalytic and Clinic) at university. I apologize if my English isn’t perfectly understandable as it isn’t my primary language. Thank you for reading and feel free to express your POV, but also to share my post with credits (Phonestre).

Note: studying Jimmy’s personality and psychology isn’t an easy task as his anamnesis cannot be done completely, but only theoretically. Psychoanalysis isn’t much translated and possess mostly French and German terms. I have tried to translate them the best I could when I couldn’t find official translations.

Theory: Jimmy has BPD (borderline personality disorder) I will prove my point by evoking the symptoms from the clinical and psychoanalytic perspectives.

Psychanalytic perspective

First of all, it is highly noticeable that Jimmy is presenting symptoms of psychosis. Theses symptoms are a part of the borderline personality disorder (which is equivalent to the “trouble de la personnalité limite” which translates to “Limited personality disorder) in which we can find, as well, symptom of neurosis.

In Jimmy’s personality, the symptoms of neurosis which are the most noticeable are the need for control and the fact that he sets himself high standards. He needs to be the best and to succeed and tends to beat himself if he cannot be as good as he wants to be (saying that Curly is a way better captain than he could ever be, for example, and his mental breakdown after he realizes it).

We can also notice the Foreclosing (Forclusion in french) in Jimmy’s behavior and especially in his hallucinations : every mistake he make, every wrong step causing negative consequences ends up haunting him in a symbolic way, through visual and auditory hallucinations (for example : getting hunted by Polle which seems to be representing his culpability, the accumulation of his mistakes, and his possible unborn child with Anya. Each mistake from Jimmy only makes his hallucinations worse).

“The foreclosed symbolic will be brought back into reality through visual, auditory, etc. hallucinations. Delusional ideas can appear linked to sexuality, to the body, to love, or even to sexual intercourses.

There is a form of breach when it comes to the Other (with a big “O”, the unfamiliar individuals, the foreign), which makes building relationships or even having acquaintances difficult”

His only close friend seems to be Curly, in which he seems to recognize himself (the other with a small “o”, the familiar, the mirror).

In the limited personality disorder, there is a noticeable instability in the relation to others (with a small “o”), switching between idealization and depreciation.

In his friendship with Curly we clearly notice it :

Idealizing Curly as the best captain, the best version of himself, his best friend, the one he wants to be… (IDEALIZATION)

Raw hatred, feeling as if Curly was abandoning him, and that Curly was self-centered, egocentric, arrogant… (DEPRECIATION)

And yet, we can indeed acknowledge that he identifies himself to Curly (other with a small “o”), as he keeps switching between viewing Curly as the captain, then viewing himself as the captain, and showing some confusion about who really crashed the ship (thinking it’s Curly’s fault, then acknowledging it’s his own fault at the end, struggling with denial).

He wanted both: to have all that Curly had (job as a captain, success, and a form of social recognition) and to be Curly himself (getting a promotion from the company and starting a new life without difficulties, not ending up at the bottom again).

The imaginary registry will then be of major influence, causing paranoia with the persuasion of knowing what the others had planned and what they thought : persuaded that Curly wanted to abandon them and start his new life, that he didn’t like them and felt as if he deserved better than being with a bunch of “failures”, but also thinking that Swansea was keeping the cryo for himself, and that Anya was going to kill Curly when she locked herself in the medical room.

This is something we also find in the jouissance without limits (Lacan), he is persuaded that others will want to hurt him in one way or another and show a high instability in life (difficulties on earth, probably linked to having the past of a criminal).

“Jouissance causes an absence of phantasms at times, which is shown by a lack, or instability of personal goals (personal projects, professional, instable and/or that keeps changing) and irregular symptoms”

His relationship with others is driven by aggression (tendencies to yell on others, try to intimidate them, using his impulsivity to gain control on others by fear and authority) or erotism (for example: joking about being attracted to cartoon horses to Anya, SA…--> Inappropriate sexual behavior)

“The subject being stuck with difficulties to differentiate himself from others will stay in an erotic or aggressive attitude toward others.”

Jimmy seems to present a certain dysfunction in the symbolic registry : indeed, he seems to take idioms literally, for example “climbing at the top of the ladder”, needing to climb down to climb another ladder, saying that he keeps climbing even if Curly doesn’t. (Climbing at the top of the ladder means getting higher and higher in their profession in that situation).

Jim also seems to be attached to Curly, because he represents who and what he wants to be from one hand. It’s an attachment based on identification. The only moments where he seems to be friendlier and warmer with Curly is when he relates to him, or recognize himself in him (Before the crash : when Curly felt down and that they were both going to be in troubles, wanting to “fix” the situation for both of them. After the crash : realizing that they both failed when they tried to do their best, realizing ONLY when he ended up In a similar-ish situation)

“Most of his relations are empty of any warmth, and that most of the emotions are expressed in a formal way, the personal feelings entirely included. The identification seems like a solution.” (Deutsch)

Jimmy ended up identifying his job at pony express as his own life, so when he lost his job, he felt as if he lost everything. If he doesn’t identify himself as his role (co-captain, that gives him a sense of control), nor as Curly, he is nothing. He doesn’t have any particular hobbies out of weightlifting with Curly (source: devs), so everything seems to revolve either around Curly and or his job. This identification allows him to ignore his past filled with difficulties, which give him a sense of worth when it comes to his existence.

Clinical Perspective

For that part, I will use what I’ve learned from the DSM-5, for the Borderline personality disorder. Most of the things described as symptoms are fitting for Jimmy and what we can observe from his behavior through the game.

Unstable vision of himself and his identity

Unstable self-confidence, setting high standards toward himself (and others…) Ex. “I need to do everything myself” Dissociation under stressful events Hallucinations (Polle, Curly) Seeing himself in Curly

Unstable visions of his goals in life

Ex. Feeling like he lost everything because Pony Express doesn’t exist anymore, making him lose his job that gave a meaning to his life. Difficulties in the past with a noticeable demotivation (Ex. Curly had to motivate him to join the job, source : how fish is made)

Difficulties to understand and recognize the emotions of others with an interpersonal hypersensibility

Focus mainly on his own feelings and perceptions, which makes him have high expectations toward others and lack empathy

Perceptions of others based on negative aspects

Focused on what he thinks about others, points out everyone’s flaws : Seeing Swansea as a liar and useless, seeing Anya as useless and whiny, seeing Curly as self-centered and hypocrite, …

Intensity and Instability in relationships

Ex. With Curly --> strong bond but that keeps switching between “you’re the best” and “I hate you”

Mistrust toward others with suspicions of hidden intentions

Ex. Persuaded that Curly wanted to get rid of him and move on, that Swansea was trying to save himself, that Anya didn’t want to take care of Curly…

Needs of validation from others

Jealousy toward Curly, angry and annoyed whenever he hears about Curly being an excellent captain, wants to be him instead and getting the praise, doing his hardest to be called as captain

Anxiety toward abandonment (real or imaginary)

Saw the end of Pony Express as an abandonment from Curly which caused an episode

Unstable attachment pattern

Insecure Ambivalent. Ex. Sometimes, he listen to Curly expressing the way he feels, and does the same (trust), and at other moments, he doesn’t even want to hear him say anything and turns abusive

Negative affects

Anxiety, depression (with suicidal thoughts, ex. The crash), feeling of emptiness

Disinhibition

Impulsivity and risks taking (the crash, his behavior toward Anya and Curly, bursts of Anger…)

Antagonism

Hostility (always into conflicts in a way or another, with a passive-aggressive, sarcastic behavior, tendencies to victimize himself)

In men, BPD shows itself in a rather different way than in women. We can notice more : moods swings, difficulties to regulates own emotions, fear of abandonment, outbursts of anger or rage (resulting in violent behavior and more impulsivity), episodes of dissociations.

After all, his job brought him a sense of stability, of control… Something he seemed to not be able to achieve due to his “difficulties on earth”.

The loss of his job and the feeling of abandonment seems to have caused an episode, and even a “split” in the way he views Curly. The crash of the ship is nothing but the consequence of impulsivity, caused by the emotional despair. After all, we don’t really know… what if Anya didn’t hide the gun ? maybe he would have used it immediately to end himself. After all he could easily get the code to gain access to it.

The fear of what could happen once back on earth accumulated with all the negative, stressful feelings contributed to his impulsive acts. He knew he would end up “at the bottom of the ladder” again because of what he did to Anya (and that she was pregnant). He was probably fearing to get abandoned by Curly, who seemed to have done a lot to help him get through the difficulties of his past, since he helped him to get his job and become co-captain. Curly seemed to be his main source of recognition and pride, since he always pointed the positive in Jimmy, and believed in him. (Curly could be what we consider the “favorite person” of Jimmy, which is quite common in patients with BPD).

“I hope it hurts”

“pain is how we know we're still living”

From Jimmy perspective, it could be linked to him feeling constant pain, which is common in BPD. “I hope it hurts” could be seen as  “I hope you can get in my shoes”, or could simply being hope that Curly survived. I don’t think the second sentence was meant to be mean, but more of a fact that he relates, in a way.

“You are what you eat”. I think this popular sentence works well to talk about the scene where he cuts and eats Curly’s leg. Cannibalism is a metaphor I often saw in patients with bpd, and it’s true that the barrier between hate and love (whether it being friendship, romantic, etc.) is incredibly thin. So, it tends to mix together. I think that Jim might have craved being Curly, the captain, so badly that he ate a part of him to become him. I mean, in the end, he made Curly eat a part of himself, as if giving him back the role of captain, and right after that he apologized and took responsibility.

Psychosis allowed him to adapt post-crash, making reality more acceptable through delusion and hallucinations, so he doesn’t snap and kill himself. (ex. Victimization, feeling of persecution and fear of abandonment, pushing him to blame others for his own mistakes and misery).

This is why at the end, when he realizes that he is the culprit (since there is no one else but him and Curly, confronting him to reality), he ends up killing himself and saving Curly (since he still cared about him and genuinely felt sorry, after all, he thought the crash would kill them all, not only put Curly in such a state).

Indeed, people suffering from psychosis tend to snap and make a suicide attempt when they are confronted to raw reality, that is often unbearable for them if filled with guilt.

[felassan]

Some more DA:TV and related snippets from Sylvia Feketekuty, Part 3. rest of post under a cut due to length and spoilers. [Post One, Post Two]

Ran out of characters or something in post 2. :)

User: "I LOVE the line "a raw, strangling fear, struck somewhere deep past the heart". It's beautiful and it resonates with me since I myself struggle with anxiety. Now for the questions! 1) Can you talk more about the banter between Emmrich and Harding after we start romancing him? What is her motivation behind it? Is she critical of their relationship or is she worried about Emmrich? 2) I love the argument Rook and Emmrich have before Tearstone Island, it gives nice depth to their relationship. But what did Emmrich think he would accomplish with that conversation? Did he want to break up with Rook because he thought it would be easier for him if something happened to Rook? 3) Not a question but I love Hezenkoss. Such a dedicated hater lol. -- Sylvia Feketekuty: "That was one of the first lines where I started to feel I had a handle on his voice in the first draft, so that means a lot to hear. (And thank you for noting the team effort, I got a lot of great feeback from the other writers and the editors on Emmrich. He wouldn't be as good without them.) On to questions: 1) My personal take: I think Harding is worried because she's very perceptively noticed how hard Emmrich's fallen for Rook, and that he's a man of large emotions. (And because they become pretty good friends over the course of the game.) 2) I think Emmrich let his anxieties run away with him, afraid that this romance wasn't, couldn't possibly be the One True Love he so wanted, and that's how his fear expressed itself. (Did he WANT to break up? No, but he was bracing himself in case Rook did think it was only a fling and so on and so forth, they should get it out in the open, and so on.) 3) Thank you! I loved writing her. She will always be a hater until her (un)dying day."" [source, two, three, four, five, six] -- John Epler: "someday we'll get the Hezenkoss/Anaris reluctant team-up the world deserves" [source] -- Sylvia: "Somehow, in the realm of pure imagination, they're already trying to strangle each other." [source] -- User: "Very important question- would Anaris finger gun? (Finger crossbow?)" -- John: "as a man defined primarily by his tremendous insecurities Anaris also takes himself incredibly seriously and unconsciously mirrors Elgar'nan, an elf he both loathes and desperately wishes he were so the real question is, would Elgar'nan finger gun?" [source]

User: "On my 1st run I thought some choices felt like the 'bad' ones and avoided them - Lich Emmerich, Harding's Anger, Qunari Taash etc. But on my 2nd run I was so pleasantly surprised to see that it wasn't the case! None of the companion choices feel right or wrong, just different, and that's fantastic." / Sylvia: "Thanks! We tried to make either choice compelling, to have something for different players either way. So I'm so glad to hear that." [source]

User, on Manfred winning a character award: "Congrats Manfred we knew you had it in you!" / Sylvia: "He did it! My little skeleton pal did it! (Especial thanks to the animators and voice actor, Matt Mercer, because like 90% of his personality lives in those gangly limbs and his hissing)" [source]

User: "I just wanted to say that Emmerich and Josephine are so interesting and well-written" / Sylvia: "I feel very lucky I got to bring them into DA, with teams that went for them 100%." [source]

User: "I enjoyed Emmrich's addendum to the codex about Templars in Nevarra: are they primarily there as backup if something goes profoundly wrong? Would they ever get someone who just wants to help down in the Necropolis, pretty please? (also <3 Vorgoth, they're great)" / Sylvia: ""are they primarily there as backup if something goes profoundly wrong?" That was my own take. You don't NOT want Templars, in case some ritual gets disrupted in an utterly disastrous fashion. But other times...the Mortalitasi flex their clout. "Would they ever get someone who just wants to help down in the Necropolis, pretty please?" Some Watchers might not be immune to flattery. I think a few templars could be all right under some circumstances, but that they'd be assigned a mage. (A bit of a reverse of the southern mage-templar pairs.) "(also <3 Vorgoth, they're great)" Thank you! I was so pumped when I saw the final art for them, everything I'd dreamed. (And their voice actor, Brent Mukai, was amazing.)" [source, two, three]

User: "I wanted to ask you what you think nevarran wedding attire might look like? or if you’ve considered it? asking for science." / Sylvia: "Geeze, that's a good question. I imagine the couple would exchange some custom-made grave gold pieces to mark the occasion, given how important it is in Nevarra. But other than that, you should let your imagination run wild." [source]

User: "Is seeing Josephine as Asexual or part of the Ace Spectrum a valid interpretation of her character?" / Sylvia: "Totally, if that's how you want to see the character and relationship. (My policy is generally that if it's not directly contradicted in the game, you can take that kind of thing as a valid read of the character.)" [source]

Sylvia: "I'll say this (spoiler free): there's a scene in "Walking the Graves" where I felt Emmrich's voice finally click for me on the first draft, so that one's special to me." [source]

User: "I remembered some questions I had about Emmrich.. Can he play any instruments? I always invision him playing a pipe organ or maybe violin! If not, are there any he would like to learn? 😊 Also, I was curious, can he ice skate? out on that frozen Nevarran lake in winter" / Sylvia: "Those are interesting questions. Because they're something I never considered or wrote, there's no real canon there yet. I see Emmrich as more an appreciator of music than a musician, but can't rule it out. As for ice-skating, I'm not even sure we've shown that in Thedas. I think Emmrich would enjoy it though. UPDATE: a friend reminded me about this tidbit from World of Thedas 2: "Ice skating – during the winter in Nevarra, people often skate on the frozen over Minanter river." So it's canon now. Emmrich ice-skates. He instantly manifests a scarf when doing so. (I fall on my sword for forgetting this.)" [source, two, three]

User: "about Josephine: what would her ideal/dream wedding be? I was tickled when I read about that in her letter to her Inquisitor I just have to know" / Sylvia: "what a delightful question in turn! I think she'd want a big, flower-filled, no-holds barred wedding at her family's estate. All her relatives, friends she made in the Inquisition, the Inquisitor's relatives (if they have any/keep in touch.) She'd begin planning 16 months in advance." [source]

Sylvia: "Aw thank you! (On behalf of me, and the rest of the team, so many people worked so hard on our eccentric necromancer man.)" [source]

Sylvia: "The Mourn Watch and Emmrich are a bit eccentric, but I really wanted their reverence for the dead (and the living) to feel genuine." [source]

User: "As someone who himself gets awful pangs about the thought of death and nothingness, it was really refreshing to see a character have those same thoughts as me, especially as he also happens to be a Necromancer who is around death daily." / Sylvia: "You're welcome, and thanks for the kind words. It's a familiar thing for me too, so I really wanted to talk about it. I suspect it's far more common than we might think." [source]

User: "My HOF was a spirit healer, very kind & very curious, & for years I've considered how that special connection to spirits might lend itself to an interest in Thedan necromancy & puzzling out where spirits & souls begin & end. Emmrich, Manfred/Curiosity and the wisps gave me so much to think about!" / Sylvia: "Thank you so much! And that's interesting about your HOF. They may've found some kindred spirits if they ever ventured further north." [source]

User: "No questions other than thank you and the team for Emmrich and Nevarra / The Mourn Watch. Seeing death treated with such kindness, empathy and as beautiful renewal rather than grim end is so refreshing and personal to me, it was a great experience to have!" / Sylvia: "That's one of the things I really wanted to express in Emmrich's arc, so I'm so glad you felt that way." [source]

User: "I feel that my Rook would want to learn more about the Mourn Watch after saving the world." / Sylvia: "Emmrich and the Watchers would love that. Emmrich probably has like, five lectures he could rattle off without preparation for your Rook already, haha." [source]

User: "do you have any favorite tidbits about Audric or Myrna that you can share?" / Sylvia: "As for tidbits, hrm. I did post something on what Audric's up to these days. Nothing surprising, but he's doing well! And I never wrote it in-game, so it lives in the hazy world of "only canon in my head": while Emmrich doesn't come from nobility, Myrna does-the Van Markham branch. She had the finest education, even before the Watchers. She doesn't play it up much, though. Her real passion's her work. And the theater. (I did a small bit about her love of theater here [link or see Post Two]. I think she's a regular attendee.)" [source, two, three]

Sylvia: "I also really wanted to explore more of the Necropolis ever since I first read about it. I'm very lucky the team and I finally got to show everyone the crypts..." [source]

User: "he stories, the worldbuilding, the characters, the locations, I loved it all so much I played my MW Rook twice" / Sylvia: "Nice. The Mourn Watch appreciates your studious interest in the hallowed art of necromancy." [source]

Sylvia: "thank you on behalf of the whole team, as you've surmised there were a lot of people bringing him to life. (Especial props to Nick Borraine, his VA, who's wonderful in the role.)" [source]

Sylvia: "It always makes me happy when people mention the short stories, and glad you enjoyed meeting (and perhaps romancing...) Emmrich." [source]

Sylvia, on Vorgoth: "I'm afraid I deliberately left our cloak-shrouded Watcher a mystery. But I'll say this: I'm sure they'd show your Rook in that picture their art collection, an honor Vorgoth bestows only on those they like or trust." [source]

User: "does the watch have any rules in regards to courtship/marriage between fellow watchers? An does Emmrich lecture at the Necropolis or at the College of Magi in Cumberland?" / Sylvia: "1) I actually got into that a little here [link or see Post Two]. Short story, it's not forbidden for mages within Circles to court or marry, so no particular rules there I think. 2) That is a very good question. Full disclosure, I am answering on the fly with what I think makes most sense. I can see Emmrich doing a bit of both in his younger days. But as he grew older, more specialized in his field, and had more MW responsibilities, he probably worked more out of the Necropolis. (And prefers it anyhow.) By the time DAV starts, it's probably been years since he was in Cumberland." [source, two, three]

User: "Thank you for your moving portrayal of thanatophobia. While most people have some fear of death, it was amazing to see the thanatophobic panic attacks etc portrayed so accurately." / Sylvia: "Thanks - they're not an unfamiliar phenomenon to me, I wanted Emmrich to try to get across that helplessness and wretched terror. (I suspect more people are affected by them than we commonly talk about.)" [source]

User: "whoever decided “DA liches are immortal protectors and not always evil?” Chef’s kiss. It’s all I’ve ever wanted!" / Sylvia: "Thanks again! It was in Emmrich's first draft. The other writers and editors gave me good feeback on lichdom and the philosophy behind it especially" [source]

User: "I wonder, did you prefer writing for either lich Emmrich or mortal? I would imagine it's a bit different." / Sylvia: "I wouldn't say I had a favorite, but it was fun to try to figure out what approach to take in scenes that had split lich/mortal lines. I didn't want Emmrich to be unrecognizable as a lich, but I did want him to occasionally be a little different, slowly absorbing what he'd become. We see him at the start of this new stage of his existence, so I think even by the end of Veilguard he's still just at the very start of adjusting to, and exploring, what he is now. I liked giving him that wonder!" [source, two]

Sylvia: "The Memorial Gardens were the heart of the Necropolis to me, the level artists and level designer and our audio team worked so much magic there. (And the lighting team! First time I saw it properly lit I think I clapped.)" [source]

User: "Also wanted to know if you wrote Josephine’s letter to Inquisitor if romanced?" / Sylvia: "I did write that letter, thanks! It was a joy to return to Josephine, even in a codex sent to her dearest Inquisitor." [source]

Sylvia on where Emmrich sleeps: "As to his sleeping arrangements, I gave a tantalizing (non) answer here [[link] or see [Post Two]]. (Though I think he'd prefer a proper bed, whatever form it takes. Emmrich's too old to be sleeping on cots like a student anymore.)" [source]

Sylvia: "So glad the team and I got to crack open the ancient doors of the Grand Necopolis, I've been curious about it too ever since reading about it eons ago. (And very glad you're liking MW Rook, I really wanted things to feel different when chatting with Emmrich as a Watcher yourself!)" [source]

User: "I enjoyed Johanna IMMENSELY and she is most definitely my favourite villain of all time now, so thank you for her as well!" / Sylvia: "She was a treat to write. (And Hezenkoss would 100% applaud you on your fine judgement and obvious taste.)" [source]

Sylvia on Emmrich's fear: "I'm not unfamiliar with that fear either, and it means a great deal to hear getting to know Emmrich helped you out even a little. (And happy to hear you dug Manfred!)" [source]

Sylvia: "I'm especially glad you liked the battle theme. Our music director instantly got the tone of Emmrich's arc, he and the audio team spun off so many great tracks from that core theme." [source]

User on Emmrich: "He's a brilliant character and everyone involved in his creation should be very proud!" / Sylvia: "There were a lot of people working on him, I was lucky so many people got onboard right away with our professor of necromancy. And I loved writing him chatting with Bellara, the mentor/student relationship was fun to hash out with her writer." [source]

User: "(1/2) Hello Sylvia! Like everyone else, I love Emmrich, but I also wanted to say thank you for your work in DAI. Josie was my first romance in DA and I love her a lot. My question had to do with her codex entry in Veilguard for a romanced Inquisitor: (2/2) Her letter in Veilguard implies she hasn't married yet, 10 years later. Josie is so image-conscious in how she conducts herself, so I was surprised she would put off marriage for that long as the first born noble of her house. Curious what the idea behind it was if you can share." / Sylvia: "Thank you! I'm honored to hear Josepine was your first DA romance. Re: marriage, you're right, that is a big time gap. I basically didn't want to surprise returning players with a marriage that had already happened to their Inquisitor offscreen. I'm sure Josephine has kept busy with world affairs, and so has the Inquisitor, which isn't a bad reason it's taken so long. But I thought it'd be more engaging for players to imagine the proposal, how they'd react, what the wedding would be like, as something good happening to them in the future." [source, two]

User: "I wanted to ask about banter I saw online; why does Taash say Emmrich smells like potash? Isn't that a bad smell, like rotten eggs? He doesn't strike me as a smelly person outside of being around the dead. Maybe Trick would know too" / Trick Weekes: "IIRC, I based it on residual scents that would come from chemicals -- can't remember whether it was what you'd get from working with embalming liquids or something used to style hair. That said, Taash comments on scents non-adaari can't detect, so it's not like he smells bad to normal people." [source] / Sylvia: "Chiming in late, but what Trick said. Taash has an incredible sense of smell, but they're detecting the tiny residuals. (Which is why poor Taash can smell that burial Emmrich helped with, even though he scrubbed down thoroughly afterwards. Gotta keep hygienic!)" [source]

User: "I wish more games had Romances like this, he was just simply perfect. [Emmrich] believably cares for Rook." / Sylvia: "I'm glad that part felt heartfelt, it was one of the cores of his romance for me." [source]

User: "What inspired you to want to go into writing for games? Or just writing in general?" / Sylvia: "I've played games since I was about 5 years old and that's what really did it. I fell in love at once with these cool, weird little worlds you could visit as someone else. As for writing in general, it feels goofy (or ominous) to call it a Calling, but it's just something I've always enjoyed doing. It's also probably what I'm best at, which means I'm unfathomably lucky I ended up at BioWare. I don't think I would've been happy until I was doing game writing somewhere, somehow!" [source, two]

User: "I have two questions about his and Johanna's childhood. 1. How and when did he and her(johanna) meet? 2. What was the story between him and her back then? Sorry if it's too long a question. Thank you! Oh I'm so sorry, how could I forget another important question😭😓 3. How tall do you think he is👀 He's almost as tall as Taash!" / Sylvia: "I have not forgotten the other two questions, I'll get to them later (it's just getting late here) but this one's a little easier. I THINK he's about 6 foot 2 inches without his boots, so about 6 foot 3 with them on. (A character artist would have to confirm or deny if I'm remembering right.)" [source]

Sylvia on her time at BioWare: "So I gt a 5 year award statue that looked like a glass disc, and then we swapped over the to the BioWare Character award statues so I got Wrex as my 10th one. (I think I remember people who'd been around earlier than me with those clocks on their desks!)" [source]

[wolvertooth]

(Weapon X 2017, issues #2 + #15)

its interesting thinking about how they can so easily tell when the other is lying, and how its vital for their relationship, especially due to how often logan lies n covers his true feelings

sure, if he got together with a psychic like jean, she'd be able to tell just as easy, but with someone like her he'd always have that guilty feeling of needing to cover up the worst parts of himself for her

but with victor, he couldnt be seen as evil no matter how much he let loose. he can get mad, he can get mean, but theyre both so good at healing from eachother it wouldnt make a dent for long

and i think that pisses him off somehow, the side of him that feels like hes deserving of being seen as a bad person, which he interprets as just being annoyed by vic...

like, in the moments where he genuinely manages to anger the other, its like hes got the upperhand on their relationship. like vic not being bothered means hes not taking logan seriously or something. when really he just knows that logan doesnt even really mean it half the time, leading to logan getting frustrated that his act isnt working

theyve both got some messed up control issues that leaks into their trust issues, logan especially feeling like hes gotta have the wheel on others perception of him, due to struggling so often with having others misunderstand who he really is, needing to mold even a false characterization of himself just to have that control over his own narrative

vics parallel of that is just agreeing with the way others have characterized him, in order to have the control that hes reclaiming it, while he knows deep down it isnt entirely the truth

dies 1billion deaths v_v

(repost of my comment on @isntverynice 's Wretched and Precious ch2 cuz it kinda went hard lol)

[mapoeggplant]

skip to loafer chapter 62 analysis // spoilers

skip to loafer reiterated its message of "i love you as a person" in a soft and fun chapter. and with that, takamatu-sensei prepares us for a new arc that promises to be full of unforgettable moments.

(since the translation is still very fresh, i'll try to focus more on using the raws not to spoil anyone. i hope you understand that!!)

honestly, i find light chapters like this the hardest to analyze on their own, especially ones like chapter 62 that brings back several loose ends in order to tie up another knot before continuing the journey. so, instead of analyzing the chapter itself, i'm going to bring back some old debates and fit them into this new phase of each character.

even though friendship was the main point of the chapter, in my opinion mika also deserves her own spotlight since, in one way or another, she basically served as a bond between the two groups.

in the case of the boys, her name is brought up when shima reveals that he invited her to his travel group, without much thought of the consequences. this causes a certain amount of anger in mukai, who was the person who witnessed very closely mika's reactions before and after the confession (and even later, when she was talking to nao by the beach). however, he’s also one of shima’s oldest friends, so he knows exactly what he been through, which is te exactly reason why he acts impulsively. 

it's as if he were between two different oceans, not knowing which way to go, since both are too turbulent for him to navigate. it's hard for mukai to completely side with his friend, since mika's feelings are still very vivid to him, but he knows all the difficulties that shima went through regarding her own internal terrors, that’s why he holds himself back to not curse him or anything. what he ends up choosing is the safest rote, which is to scold him with an open heart, making sure to show that what he did was wrong. in the end, he won’t explain it to shima the exact reason why he’s mad because he knows he doesn’t have the rights to speak for mika, that’s why the message gets a little confusing for shima, who’s still learning and growing (and honestly, the reacting of stop to understand where mukai was coming from is actually a big step for him, which i appreciate). 

in the case of the girls, mika is also the only one who, up until now, knows about the events before and after the confession. she can see the sincerity and kindness behind shima, who continues to respect and see her as a friend, but it's hard not to assume a protective position when the new person to be affected by the same feelings is mitsumi, someone who she became so important to her. and that's where her growth as a character is slowly revealed.

mika has always created her own barrier and has had difficulty opening up to the girls. and that didn’t start recently, since she have been dealing with her insecurities for as long as she can remember. mika spend most of her childhood alone and had a hard time to make friends when she started her teenage years, which led her to have a very abrupt start when she met mitsumi, yuzu and makoto. for her, it has always been very difficult to see herself in a group of friends and to be comfortable with herself to the point of expressing her mind clearly. 

as the story go by, we can see how comfortable mika is now with the girls, but old habits are hard to erase. even with all her conversations with nao and the peace she feels around her friends, there are still a lot to be unfold and a lot to grow. 

however, for her to grow, she needs to keep trying. and that’s when she choses to shine in this chapter: she finally manages to open up to mitsumi and reveal the secret that corrupts her so much. 

ever since mitsumi confessed the relationship she and shima had, mika has been struggling with indecision about whether to open up or keep the event forever as a bad memory from the past. it's hard for her, since she doesn't want to lose mitsumi's friendship or the other girls', but she also needs to accept what happened in order to finally say goodbye to them. it's not that she doesn't have her feelings cleared up inside her or that they still have a chance to blossom again. what really hits her is the fact that she's hiding something she considers important from her best friends, which might results in a awkward situation later on. 

the moment mika admits out loud that mitsumi is much more important in her life than any past crush, mika is finally saying goodbye to this weight she's carried for so long and can finally start another chapter in her life. now, she no longer has anything hidden or needs to walk on eggshells — the love she embraced and the love she receives are enough for her to stand tall. 

the development of skip to loafer's friendships is indeed something that needs to be celebrated. throughout the narrative, we are constantly reminded that the story itself is built on the idea that love doesn't need to be romantic to be true, it just needs to be felt. loving someone is accepting their flaws and understanding their scars, like mukai and shima; loving someone is being vulnerable, like mika and mitsumi; loving someone is going out together to buy clothes for a trip they've been waiting for.

it's beautiful to see how the girls care about mitsumi and her feelings, but still root for her happiness and are excited for her. it's beautiful to see how they're always together in difficult times, whether they're big or small (or even medium, like what's the right outfit to wear on a date. that's very important for a teenage girl). 

and for shima and mitsumi, it’s cute to see how shy they are around each other and how they are allowed to slowly understand their feelings. the narrative doesn’t force them to anything at any point or rushes them to a resolution, what it does is explore the nuances and difficulties of dealing with your first ever romantic love, specially when you were never allowed to explore your own feelings in the first place (like shima), and the fear of losing a best friend that you cares so much (like mitsumi feels). 

i don’t think this is the calm before the storm, but i do believe takamatsu-sensei is getting us ready for what’s coming next. i do believe this will be a very decisive arc for a lot of characters, but it will also birth many more plots for us to explore.

thank you so much for reading 💛 don't forget to support the author if you can and also thank the translation group!!

and if you're interested, i wrote a while ago an analysis about skip to loafer's "i love you as a person" message. just click here to find it!

[hrizantemy]

It truly is baffling how so many people can acknowledge Elain’s unhappiness in the Night Court—how she feels out of place and trapped—but then turn around and refuse to extend that same logic to Nesta, whose dissatisfaction is arguably even more glaring. It’s not hating on Elain to point out the double standard here. Both sisters are fundamentally unsuited to the Night Court’s values, yet only Elain gets the empathy and recognition for it.

Nesta’s dreams and desires have always been clear. She’s never been about the Night Court’s ideals of camaraderie or belonging. Nesta wanted freedom—freedom to explore, to travel, to chase her ambitions on her own terms. She outright said she wanted to see the world. She wanted more than Velaris, more than Illyria, more than playing house with Feyre and Rhysand in their self-contained little kingdom. Yet, instead of honoring that aspect of her character, she’s stuck. Why? Because of other people. Feyre and Cassian are the anchors chaining her to the Night Court, a place that has never been her home, a place that stripped her autonomy and belittled her at every turn.

What’s even worse is how this is framed as a “happy ending” for her. She’s supposedly “healed” because she found Cassian and reconciled with Feyre, but what about her dreams? What about her desires? Nesta Archeron deserved to be out there exploring new lands, learning new cultures, reclaiming her sense of self. Instead, she’s in a place where she has to constantly suppress the parts of her that don’t fit the Inner Circle’s mold, pretending that being tied to Cassian is enough to fulfill her when, let’s be real, it’s not.

The narrative doesn’t just ignore her longing for freedom—it actively erases it by shackling her happiness to Cassian and Feyre. It’s like her whole arc was boiled down to “you don’t need to travel or chase your dreams; you just need to learn how to belong in Velaris.” It’s suffocating to think about, especially when you compare how freely Elain’s discontent is acknowledged. Everyone is so quick to sympathize with Elain’s alienation because it’s “obvious” she doesn’t belong in the Night Court—but Nesta, who has outright said she doesn’t want to be there, is expected to grin and bear it.

It’s not hate; it’s just infuriatingly obvious that Nesta is not thriving in the Night Court. She’s surviving. She’s coping. She’s settling because of the people she loves, but it’s at the expense of the person she could have been. And the fact that so few people see it—or, worse, choose to ignore it—is my own thirteenth reason.

It’s absolutely enraging how at the end of Nesta’s healing book, she still has to earn love—whether it’s from Cassian, Feyre, or the Inner Circle—and we’re supposed to buy into the idea that this is a “happy ending.” How is it healing if she has to prove herself worthy of the people who should have loved her unconditionally? How is it growth if she’s still bending over backward to fit their expectations, rather than being allowed to exist as she is?

Take Cassian, for example. Their relationship is framed as some great love story, but the dynamic is painfully uneven. Nesta spends the entire book being berated, degraded, and humiliated—often by Cassian himself—and yet she’s the one who has to grovel for his love. She’s the one who has to change. At the end, it’s made clear that he hasn’t fully forgiven her, even though his own actions—his cruel words, his dismissal of her trauma—are never addressed. She saves his life, literally redefines herself through sacrifice, and still, it feels like she’s being tested, like his love is conditional on her “proving” she’s no longer the woman he once judged. How is that love? How is that a happy ending?

And Feyre? Nesta’s entire arc is twisted into some redemption for the harm she did to Feyre, but where’s Feyre’s acknowledgment of her own mistakes? Where’s her apology for the years she ignored Nesta, for the way she dismissed her struggles, for throwing her into a situation where she was humiliated and isolated? Feyre’s love is only extended when Nesta conforms to her expectations—when she becomes the sister Feyre wanted all along, not the person she was. Nesta has to save Feyre’s life, give up her power, and completely transform herself to be accepted. That’s not a resolution; it’s a transaction.

And let’s not even start on their father. He shows up, what, once to sacrifice himself, and suddenly we’re supposed to believe everything is forgiven? This man neglected Nesta her entire life. He let her carry the weight of their family’s survival, let her bitterness fester, let her fight battles he didn’t have the strength to face. But in the end, it’s Nesta who’s forced to let go of her anger, to remember him fondly, to forgive. Where’s the justice for her? Where’s the acknowledgment that his failings shaped so much of her pain? Instead, the narrative tells us that she has to be the bigger person, because heaven forbid anyone else take accountability.

Then there’s the Inner Circle. They despise Nesta throughout the book, openly mock her, and isolate her at every turn. And yet, by the end, it’s presented as some triumph that she’s finally “earned” their acceptance. Why does Nesta have to “earn” love and respect from people who treated her like an enemy? Why is she expected to grovel while none of them reflect on their own cruelty? The book frames this as her becoming part of their “family,” but it reads more like Nesta finally learning to make herself small enough to fit into their perfect little world.

This isn’t a happy ending. This is a tragedy of a woman forced to give up pieces of herself to gain conditional love. Nesta’s “healing” is nothing more than her being stripped of her autonomy, her rage, and her dreams, all so she can be more palatable to the people around her. And the fact that we’re supposed to cheer for that—supposed to believe that’s what she deserved—is not only insulting, it’s heartbreakingly obvious.

It is absolutely maddening how, after A Court of Silver Flames gives us Nesta’s so-called “happy ending,” the next book has her saving an entire world—a literal act of heroism—and yet she’s met with threats of execution. Meanwhile, Rhysand and Feyre have put the entirety of Prythian in jeopardy time and time again, yet their actions are met with excuses, understanding, and blind adoration. How is that even remotely fair?

Nesta sacrifices everything—her power, her autonomy, her very soul—to protect the people she loves and even those who have wronged her. Her act of saving the world should have cemented her as a hero, someone worthy of respect and admiration. But instead of gratitude or acknowledgment, she’s threatened? The hypocrisy is glaring. When Feyre and Rhysand risk the entire realm with their schemes, their gambles, and their alliances, they’re treated like untouchable saints. But when Nesta acts selflessly, it’s somehow twisted into something punishable.

Let’s not forget, Feyre and Rhysand—put everyone at risk. With the constant machinations, secret deals, and habit of withholding critical information have endangered not just their own court but the entire continent. Yet, no one ever brings up the consequences of their actions. They’re not threatened with execution; they’re celebrated as cunning, brave, and self-sacrificing.

But Nesta? Nesta, who saved an entire world at immense personal cost, is immediately vilified. It’s not even subtle. She’s never allowed the benefit of the doubt, never given the same understanding Feyre and Rhysand get on a silver platter. It’s as if the narrative can’t stand for her to succeed without reminding her—and the audience—that her love and sacrifice are still conditional. It’s a deliberate attempt to undermine her triumph, to ensure that no matter how much she gives, she’s never allowed to rise above the labels they’ve slapped on her.

What’s worse is that the Inner Circle’s hypocrisy in this moment is staggering. These are the same people who rallied behind Feyre and Rhysand through every bad decision and questionable gamble, but when Nesta makes the ultimate sacrifice, they threaten her life? It’s as if their love and loyalty only extend to those who fit their narrow idea of family, and Nesta—no matter what she does—will never truly be one of them. She can save worlds, bring people back from the brink of death, and give up everything she has, but it will never be enough.

This isn’t just unfair—it’s infuriating. The blatant favoritism Feyre and Rhysand receive compared to Nesta is a reminder that the Night Court’s supposed ideals of fairness and family are nothing but a facade. Nesta’s journey should have ended with her being celebrated for the hero she is, not treated as a disposable threat. But the narrative refuses to let her win, and that’s the real tragedy.

What’s even more infuriating is how people are begging for Elain to go off on the Night Court and the Inner Circle, yet when Nesta does the exact same thing, she’s vilified for it. The double standard is honestly exhausting. Everyone romanticizes the idea of Elain standing up for herself, calling out the hypocrisy of the Inner Circle, and rejecting the expectations they’ve placed on her—but when Nesta dares to push back, she’s labeled as bitter, cruel, or ungrateful. Why is it empowering for Elain to fight back, but when Nesta does it, it’s a problem?

Nesta has always been the one to challenge the Inner Circle’s hypocrisy. She’s called out their sanctimonious behavior, refused to play by their rules, and made it clear that she doesn’t owe them anything. And instead of being seen as someone standing up for herself, she’s treated as a villain for it. She’s punished for not falling in line, for not worshipping at the altar of Feyre and Rhysand, for refusing to be molded into their perfect little family. Meanwhile, Elain, who has spent the entire series quietly enduring, is suddenly being lauded as a feminist icon for maybe, possibly, calling out the same things Nesta’s been railing against for years.

The worst part is that the people who love the idea of Elain confronting the Night Court are the same ones who tore Nesta down for her anger and defiance. When Nesta lashes out, it’s framed as her being toxic or cruel, but when Elain hypothetically does it, it’s framed as a moment of empowerment. Why is Elain allowed to have righteous anger, but Nesta isn’t? Why is Elain’s potential rebellion seen as a triumph, while Nesta’s defiance is seen as a flaw?

Nesta’s anger has always been justified. She has every right to be furious with the Inner Circle for how they’ve treated her—for their judgment, their cruelty, their complete lack of understanding. But instead of being validated, she’s told to “get over it” and “be grateful” for their so-called help. Elain, on the other hand, is handed endless sympathy, and her potential anger is preemptively celebrated. It’s yet another way the narrative, and the fandom, refuses to give Nesta the same grace they so readily extend to others.

The truth is, people only like rebellion when it’s palatable. Elain’s quiet, subtle defiance fits the narrative they want to see: a meek girl finally finding her voice. But Nesta’s anger has always been too loud, too raw, too real for people to handle. She’s messy and unapologetic, and instead of celebrating her for it, they tear her down. It’s a double standard that perfectly encapsulates why Nesta’s story feels so unfinished—because no matter what she does, she’ll never be allowed the freedom and empowerment that everyone is so eager to grant Elain.

[pruneunfair]

Rating female leads in manhwa.

Navier

6/10, I absolutely hate her writting and has devolved into a mary sue who only reacts to everything around her while her mass of supporters never shut up about great she is. Her synopsis claiming her as someone who loves all her subjects gets contradicted when its shown she doesnt really care about the slaves.

BUT in season 1 she wasn't bad, I liked her resolve and it was when she actually cared for her people, I feel like if we got to see a clear backstory beyond "she wasn't allowed outside when she studied to be empress" I would understand her total apathy more.

Ariande

7/10, I adore villains, especially villainous protagonists and at first I liked the idea she wouldn't be any better than her family but still had a soft spot for Arabella, she loses a few points because it turns out she's excused for killing people before in the name of "love" and is viewed as someone who can do no wrong.

Adelaide

10/10, she's like Navier but better, she has more noticeable flaws and while she is a kick ass warrior during the tower arcs she still is human and can't always take it alone without consequences, she acknowledges Diane's struggles and makes an effort not to be her enemy and is proof that you dont need to make FL overpowered gods to be strong women. A beautifully made FL in a underrated story

Robellia

1/10, She doesn't divorce her husband despite the title literally being "I will divorce my tyrant husband." But that's more of a problem in most other manhwa. She's too much of a perfect epic goddess for me and most of all she does the whole "buying all the slaves but giving them a home." to make her look even better, what is with manhwa and inserting slavery for no other reason other than to make the FL look better?

Arianna

0/10, there is nothing good about her. Other than being a mary sue and a personality that only revolves around the latest sexy man, she legit forces another guy to join her haram by threatening diplomatic war on his kingdom and bodyshames her fiance but all of a sudden wants him more than ever when he loses weight, it took a random chick being inserted with a 🍇ist persona to make her look "better."

Yerenica

6/10, in any other story, this girl would've been despised by the fandom for being a homewreaker/pick me. She gives me so much second hand embarrassment but she's not terrible, I actually really like her design too. Not a fan of the kidnapper-hostage relationship she and the ML have though.

Pereshati

10/10, the best one here. She feels so much more human than the others on this list, she's got flaws, a relationship with the ML Therdeo that has both realistic progression, blunders, but overall healthy love, she also has relationships outside of her husband which I really love, I actually get scared for her when shes in danger instead of the usual "oh great, heres the typical kidnapping trope", a great motherly FL

Hestia

5/10 I will be easy on her since I just started reading my derelict favorite but I've only heard bad things about it through spoilers so I don't have much hope, also girl, please acknowledge that just because your favorite character did it for love doesn't mean he's absolved for murdering 2 people, thank you

Edith

9/10, my 3rd favorite on this list. You do not know how happy I was when instead of immediately viewing Rhyse as a rival to defeat, she was actually nice to her and the chapters of them were so sweet, she even acknowledges that it isn't anyone's fault for acting out but the author who is pulling the strings.

Layla

8/10, I feel so bad for this poor girl. For some reason I noticed on reddit and tiktok that she's getting hate for not standing up to herself or just not being the usual "girlboss" protagonist, did it not occur that she cant do much to a duke!? Layla deserves so much better and she needs to be far away from Matthias, I don't care if it's "dark romance" he is torturing her for his own pleasure.

[keiriiz]

Chrollo Relationship/Romantic Headcanons

Now for these headcanons, this is where my opinion might really differ from the rest of you guys. Of course this isn’t all but just some of my favorites. I will be putting a clear NSFW warning for when I start to talk about him in bed. 🔞

I do want to add that some of my headcanons would change depending on his partner. If they’re a Nen-user or not, exactly what their ability is, if they’re in the Phantom Troupe, and how long he’s known them, etc. These are just as neutral as possible haha. Even some of what I say here contradicts how I’ve written him in certain ships because I knew exactly how he would act for those specific love interests.

✥ Right of the bat, Chrollo is bi-romantic, having very little preference of gender when it comes to his s/o. And sexuality wise, he’s definitely on the demisexual spectrum.

✥ Chrollo never really planned on being in a long term relationship or ever settling down with someone when he created the Phantom Troupe. It was just another aspect of life he was prepared to sacrifice. So giving a genuine relationship a shot he’d have to really love the other person.

✥ It would take forever for Chrollo to actually recognize he was feeling romantic attraction to another person as the entire thing is foreign to him.

✥ This man’s charisma goes out the drain when trying to flirt with someone he’s genuinely interested it. Tapping his fingers as a stim while he awkwardly flirts. It’s painfully adorable.

✥ Before making things official, he may do extensive research on his s/o. Background checks, verifying friends and family members, overall borderline stalking. It’s a safety measure. He doesn’t want to risk falling for someone who works for an opposing group or who might betray him.

✥ In a relationship, his s/o would be a source of comfort, especially if the relationship is long term. He’ll relax in their arms after a heist or cuddle up to them when he has a nightmare.

✥ I said in my last post but I’ll say it again here. Chrollo is a little spoon!

✥ It’s not too often Chrollo will verbally tell someone he loves them, his main ways of showing affection are quality time, and gift giving. And for his special someone, he wouldn’t just give them random things willy-nilly, he’d put thought behind each one. Say his partner mentions needing new shoes because their current ones are really worn out. You bet next time Chrollo sees them he’s bringing two pairs of brand new shoes.

✥ He loves to be able to lay his head in his s/o’s lap and have them play with his hair while he reads. He might even purr if given the right setting.

✥ Chrollo can be touch avoidant in general. If anyone touches him and he hasn’t given that person mental permission he will move away, shudder even. So if he’s actually allowing another in his space it really is a sign of fondness.

✥ This man definitely takes notes from romance novels he’s read when it comes to dates with someone he’s head over heels for. It can be cheesy.

✥ Chrollo isn’t a chef by any means but on occasion he’ll attempt to cook for his s/o when staying in. Might as well put some of his cook books to use after all.

✥ The times Chrollo is with his partner, things can be quite pleasant. However he can still be emotionally distant. He often wonders what he did to deserve all of this. To be able to love and be loved. It’s a mental battle he might struggle with quite often in the relationship and he wouldn’t be too open to communicating that, leaving his s/o confused. Just some general reassurance could go a long ways.

✥ I feel like a lot of people go for the idea that he’d like others with similar interests or are like him in general, and I could see potential in that mindset however I much prefer the “opposites attract” trope. I think Chrollo might have a bigger interest in someone different than him who can really show a different perspective on certain things. Or even test his mindset and show him new interests.

✥ He’s protective of his s/o, knowing with the life he has, anyone might try to hurt them to get to him so Chrollo wouldn’t be one to really “show off” his partner unfortunately. They relationship could be pretty private.

✥ Assuming his s/o isn’t in the Troupe, Chrollo may ghost them while he’s away on the job. He’ll let them know he’s working, but no calls or texts while he’s away. He won’t even give a location. He wants to keep his personal life separate and doesn’t want to risk revealing to an enemy his relationship or possibly get distracted.

NSFW BELOW ‼️

✥ Before the relationship, Chrollo didn’t really like sex (as I mentioned him being demi), he viewed the act as a chore used on jobs to get information and didn’t find it all that gratifying.

✥ With his s/o, Chrollo much prefers to make love as opposed to casual sex. He likes the intimacy of being with someone he truly loves and not just an act of pleasure.

✥ He prefers bottoming though is open to being a verse. Acting as Boss all the time he really just likes to relax in his personal life so in all honesty it wouldn’t be rare to catch him being a pillow prince in bed.

✥ Chrollo’s not the biggest cock wise, probably just reaching average. He’s uncut being from Meteor City but trust and believe he keeps that shit clean with his pubic hair trimmed.

✥ He’ll almost never out right ask for sex, he’s honestly fine if his partner doesn’t have any interest in the act either. Though if they make a move he’s more than happy for a session.

✥ He’s got VERY sensitive nipples. Give them a little tug with your teeth and he’ll mewl.

✥ Aftercare is always a given between him and his s/o. If Chrollo just got done bottoming, cuddles and praise are a must. He’d especially melt if given a massage.

[deepestdelulu]

5 classics for my girlies

Emily of New Moon

The bittersweet process of growing up and finding where you truly belong... The perfect read for the start of a new school year. After her father’s death, Emily Starr is sent to live with her snobbish relatives at New Moon farm. Thrust into an unfamiliar and often cold environment, Emily faces numerous challenges. However, as time passes, she begins to adapt and discovers the beauty in her surroundings. With the support of her new friends—Teddy, Perry, and Ilse—Emily not only finds solace but also discovers her own creative talents, helping her carve out a place for herself in this new chapter of her life.

“If it's IN you to climb you must -- there are those who MUST lift their eyes to the hills -- they can't breathe properly in the valleys.”

Jane Eyre

A true classic for all my fellow gothic-lit enthusiasts, Jane Eyre, reminds us that everyone deserves a love that consumes, challenges, and transforms the very core of your being, offering both profound joy and deep heartache (we love a good situationsship). Following Jane Eyre, an orphaned and mistreated girl who endures a harsh upbringing but grows into a strong, independent woman. As she takes a position as a governess at Thornfield Hall, she encounters the enigmatic Mr. Rochester, sparking a profound and tumultuous romance. Their intense connection is marred by secrets and personal demons, revealing the complexities of their relationship.

“Jane, be still; don't struggle so like a wild, frantic bird, that is rending its own plumage in its desperation." "I am no bird, and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being, with an independent will; which I now exert to leave you.”

The Secret Garden

Mary Lennox, a spoiled and neglected girl, is sent to live with her uncle after the death of her parents. Initially ill-tempered and withdrawn, Mary’s curiosity is sparked by rumours of a hidden, abandoned garden on the estate. As she explores and begins to restore this secret garden, she experiences a beautiful shift (glow-up era). The once gloomy and sickly Mary starts to bloom alongside the garden, rediscovering happiness, vibrancy, and a sense of belonging, making the story a heartwarming tale of growth and recovery.

“At first, people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then they begin to hope it can be done, then they see it can be done--then it is done, and all the world wonders why it was not done centuries ago.”

Pride and Prejudice

Truly a classic that has shaped my romantic expectations hahah... Elizabeth Bennet battles societal expectations and her own misjudgments in 19th-century England. When the aloof Mr Darcy (he'd totally be a ghoster in the 21st century just saying...) first crosses her path, their initial encounters are fraught with tension and misunderstanding. However, as Elizabeth delves deeper, she uncovers the complexities of Darcy’s character and her own heart.

“I could no longer help saying that I loved him. I loved him not only for his sake but for his own sake. I loved him because he was the only person who had ever really loved me for myself. I loved him because he had made me feel that I was worthy of being loved.”

The Little Prince

A young, otherworldly prince from a tiny planet travels across the universe, meeting various inhabitants and learning profound life lessons. His journey brings him to Earth, where he encounters a stranded pilot and shares his reflections on love, loss, and the essence of human connections. Through whimsical adventures and encounters, The Little Prince explores the importance of seeing with the heart rather than the eyes and reminds us of the value of friendship and innocence.

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye. The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched; they are felt with the heart.”

You guys asked for more academia/book stuff so I thought this might be a nice start, especially since I know that many of you are just getting into classics; these are all very much suitable for beginners!! <3

Love yaa