#equals
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pesky--dust · 4 months ago
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Guys, I just realized something.
We know that many small details matter in Hannibal. Traditionally, seating positions at the table are important: they indicate the degree of closeness between the host and the guest.
Hannibal usually sits at the head of the table as the host. This isn't new knowledge in this fandom, but... have you ever thought about table seating positions in Naka Choko, Ko no mono and Mizumono?
In both Naka ​​choko and Ko no mono, after Hannibal believes that Will has killed both Randall Tier (true) and Freddie Lounds (not true), he is sitting across from Will - as if they are equals.
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Screenshots from Naka Choko
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Screenshot from Ko no Mono
However, do you remember how Will and Hannibal are sitting in Mizumono, during the last supper, when Hannibal already knows that Will is lying to him, that he didn't kill Freddie Lounds, that they didn't eat her meat?
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Screenshot from Mizumono
Hannibal is sitting at the head of the table, alone. Will is sitting to his right - he is important, but he is not an equal.
Furthermore, the lamb served by Hannibal in the script is described in such a way that its ribs resemble hands folded in prayer, as if Hannibal was praying not only for Will to choose him, but also for Will to truly choose to be his equal.
This freakin' show, I swear...
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contentloadingandstuff · 13 days ago
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Equals: Chapter III - Kitsune!Male!Reader x Yae Miko
A/N: Finally, eh? I didn't expect this idea to get so popular. This one got quite chonky, 4.5k words, so I decided to post it early and just split things up. This way, you get content early and I get something to look forward to. As for making Reader an actual character, I decided that I will give him the name Fractal when I post it to AO3. Anyway, do enjoy! CW: Light violence, mentions of body modification, mentions of suicide. It's just the aperitif.
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Respected Yumemizuki Mizuki,
It has been a while since our last outing, and I cannot help but wonder if you hold a grudge for that jovial bit of teasing regarding the recent customer crisis of your bathhouse. I can only assure you I meant no harm, and pray most piously to the Sacred Sakura for your forgiveness. It was my intention all along to motivate you out of your, do not take offence, rather pathetic state of defeatism. Judging by how the issue was resolved, it seems that my ploy found significant success. Wouldn’t you agree?
Regardless, there is a matter of great importance that happens to require our attention. I am sure the situation regarding a certain destructive white fox has reached your adorable, pointy ears - it is indeed the topic of this letter. You may remember that he was rescued quite recently from the open ocean, but until yesterday, he was rather docile in terms of behavior. His sudden outburst worries me greatly; dark bags under his eyes, seemingly relentless night terrors and his words all lead me to the conclusion that his unprecedented episode of mania is related to his dreams. I will share more details at my home - feel free to visit me at your earliest convenience. Haste would be appreciated as the sedatives will wear off in about a day or so; I believe the opportunity to examine him without resistance will significantly speed up our work. 
If you indeed hold a grudge towards me, I ask you to do it for him, not for me.
Awaiting your visit, 
The Beloved, Beautiful and Powerful Kitsune Guuji of the Narukami Shrine
Yae Miko
That morning, with the warm sun shining down on her, Mizuki was greeted with the sight of soldiers as she approached the Yae estate. The walls around Miko's home towered high but, clearly, proved inefficient at stopping one of her kind. Even if in her heart Mizuki doubted that humans, further slowed by armour, could stop a fox, she acknowledged the reasoning. 
The standing officer nodded as she went past him and further into the courtyard towards the Tengu General, exchanging words with her subordinates. Mizuki stepped up, attracting Sara's attention. 
“Greetings, Yumemizuki Mizuki.” She bows formally, a gesture returned by the newcomer. 
“Good afternoon, general-sama.” 
The soldier bows deeply and walks away, leaving the two women alone. Sara glances towards the building and sighs. 
“I assume you are here for Y/N? He made a lot of hassle, I'm sure you've heard.” The Tengu crosses her arms. “He sneaked between the house staff and left shamelessly through the front gate in his fox form.”
Mizuki nods. “I see. I wonder, if I may… Isn't it too trivial of an incident for you to get personally involved?”
“Not at all. After all, the fox escaped because of the incompetence of Tenryu guards. It's no insignificant matter as the escapee was a kitsune. As you know, they are highly dangerous.”
The doctor frowns. Wasn't Y/N supposed to be docile? From Miko's previous descriptions he sounded more like a traumatised child than a violent one. 
“Was anybody hurt, general?” She asks, looking around for any bandaged or limping soldiers. 
“Hm. Well… Sort of.” Sara clears her throat. “During his extraction from a cave by the beach, two officers tried to take him in by force. Y/N resisted, scratching and biting.”
Sara turns and waves a duo of soldiers closer. “See, despite what Yae Miko told me, not only did they escape with their lives, but also with little to no harm done to them. Show her.”
One of the soldiers passes his spear to the other and, saluting his superior, wraps up his sleeve to reveal… Nothing on his left forearm. Mizuki takes his arm and moves her face closer. There are no obvious marks - no blood, no scars, not even redness of the skin. Eventually, her sharp eyes spot two barely noticeable dents. She runs her fingers over them. It's almost as if this wasn't a bite, but a simple poke with two fingers. 
“That's… Strange.” She mumbles to herself, seeking out more of these bite marks. There are very few, as if the kitsune was playing, not seriously intending to defend himself. “Did he attack you anywhere else?”
“Mhm. Here, on my face.”
Indeed - Mizuki’s eyes quickly found multiple bruises and red lines across the man's right cheek. Again, however, these didn't seem like an honest attempt at doing harm, even superficial. The markings clearly signaled the fox's hands to be the weapon, but he must have had his nails trimmed so significantly that they lost any hardness in them. Was that even possible? 
Mizuki nods. “Thank you, soldiers, general. Is Lady Miko home?”
“She is, waiting for you and keeping an eye on the Yokai. Go in, we shan't keep you here any longer.”
After a brief exchange or parting pleasantries, the women part ways. Mizuki skips up the stairs and places a few polite knocks on the door. Almost instantly it opens, revealing Miko's exhausted, but smiling face. Without a word she moves to the side and motions towards the house’s depths, inviting her guest in. Mizuki enters. 
“What's the situation? How does he feel?” She asks, looking around to guess where Miko is leading her. 
“Asleep”, comes the answer. “The Naku Weed brew will keep him like this for the next three, maybe four hours. We can work in peace.”
Mizuki lifts her perfectly groomed brow. “Isn't that poisonous?”
“Heh. Not at all, for us kitsune at least. This kind of dose would do irreparable damage to the nervous system of most yokai and humans, but our race is more protected against it.” Miko explains, pressing the knob and pushing open the door to your room. “No need to be quiet, he's out.”
Her eyes land on your unconscious body, your back turned on her. The long, grizzly scars carved into your body assault her eyes. Some are new, staring back at her with recently scabbed crimson, but some seem old - so old that their only remnant is a colourless, white line left on uneven skin. Snow-white bandages snake around your torso, some stained with dark, red blood. There are many scratches and sickly-purple bruises across your arms and torso, likely there from your mad dash of an escape. In places untouched by harm, your skin is clean, pristine, so soft that just looking at it feels like caressing velvet. The hair in your head, as white as the bandages, seems to grow messily around two pointy, fox ears, only barely relaxed due to your state. 
“He went through much trouble, I can tell.” Mizuki sits down on one of the chairs facing the bed. “Who is he? A warrior?”
Miko looks down on her hands, tone nonchalant. “Hardly. I'd say that the term… Slave… Would be more descriptive of his life.”
“S-slave…? Yours?” There is surprise, but also worry in the baku’s voice. After all, the wretched act of taking away another's freedom was prohibited for centuries, ever since Makoto came to power. The thought of Miko enslaving one of her kin…
“Not at all. I should feel insulted by the mere notion that I would stoop so low as to chain another, but I'm willing to forgive your ignorance.” Miko's gaze hardens as she looks at her friend. “You don't seem to know the basics of our history.”
“Then, please, enlighten me.”
Miko crosses her arms. “Inazuma was always welcoming towards Yokai, was it not? No matter the age, all of us could find shelter here. Baku, kappa, oni, tengu… Even malicious spirits like umibozu or ningen were left to their devices, provided they did no harm. But to this rule there was an exception. Us, kitsune.”
A sigh escapes her lips. “Before humans settled here, Inazuma was primarily a mess of city-states belonging to Yokai species, constantly warring for influence and territory. Kitsune were, of course, major players. Even a single fox could strike down tens of oni or swat even the most nimble of tengu from the sky. Our power was grand, but so was our thirst for conquest. My kind would have long conquered this land if it weren't for a major burden nature left us with. Kitsune mature slowly, so slowly that replenishing losses took centuries, millennia even. Every war was a blow to our population. Vixen like me bring litters into the world, counting up to seven kits true, but we can't reproduce at will - starvation would quickly set upon us. We knew we were a dwindling race, but we didn't bother changing our disposition.”
The Guuji stands up, starting to walk up and down the room at an even pace as she recounts. “We accumulated hate, curses, hexes. We drowned in evil, but we made light of various nithings and omens. Most of those bad charms were able to be nullified, but the more we turned against our kind, the more powerful our next opponents became. Until one fateful curse befell us.”
Mizuki stays silent, a part of her surprised at Miko's voice growing ever more silent. The next words are spoken with great care, as if to avoid insulting whatever being cast that spell. 
“May your daughters forever weep, for your unborn sons and brothers shall repent for your crimes and writhe in agony within the world below. Plague shall befall your fathers and husbands and brothers and sons until only the ninth remains standing, able to raise his arm in the name of evil.” Miko says, staring out the window. “These words, clear of any hatred towards its foxian killers, were spoken by a dying kirin.” She turns, a somber expression on her face. “Indeed, it is as you think. We, kitsune, murdered a kirin. And we were punished for it.”
You stirr in your drug-induced sleep. Miko quickly comes to your side as you turn on your back. She places a hand on your pale, scarred breast. 
“That day every male was brought to his knees by an illness unlike we saw before. It acted fast, so fast that most weren't able to even go home, let alone get help. Choking to death on their own blood, clutching their throats with veiny, purple hands, they fell and died on the street, corpses soon littering every corner. They died in agony and panic, no matter who they were - a soldier, a hunter, a doctor, a farmer… All paid for something our entire race was responsible for. Not even children were spared… They… Died the quickest. Newborns died in their cribs while infants spasmed in their mother's wombs. As it said - the majority of our dogs died, leaving the nation’s vixens in maddening grief. Only one in nine males survived, and each was only decades old… Far too young to hold a spear.”
She continues, stroking your hair. “In a matter of years our society plummeted into disarray. From the lack of engineers to keep our cities whole to a dreadful absence of warriors to fend off other, vengeful races. A male birth was an event so grand that entire towns came to greet the kit. We crumbled into dust, gradually pushed back to the brink of extinction, saved only by the coming of Makoto who chose to enforce peace between the Yokai.”
Her hands roam around to yours, her index finger stroking the bruises and scratches around your wrists. “Dogs became previous. They had to be protected, at all costs. We kept them inside, we monitored their every step, rushed to their side with medicine at the smallest cough. Their extinction meant our end - we couldn't allow that. Us vixen took it to heart so much that, over the centuries, males went from priceless treasure to slaves. To goods, like gold or the purest jewels. They were trained from birth to obey, forced into a rigorous training regiment to remain healthy and appealing to their owners, and sold when the time came - for Mora or political favours. Some vixens treated their dogs well, while some enjoyed torturing them for their sick entertainment; but no matter the personal preference, we sent them a clear message - they weren't people.”
Both women remain silent; Mizuki takes in her friend's words while Miko grips your wrists gently, clenching her teeth. For what they did to you, they deserved to be treated likewise. They deserved to be fed from a bowl, to be fed raw meat, to be assaulted whenever their captors wished. To have their clothes, their children, their dignity, their foxhood stripped away. 
“They deserve to be treated like animals. For what they did.” She hisses through her teeth, feeling the sting of tears behind her eyes. Helplessness. 
“Hm?” Mizuki shakes her head out of deep thought and asks. 
“Nevermind.” Milo sighs. “There is a reason, Mizuki, that even the benevolent and kind Makoto could not bare to see what we were doing to them. She ordered our race to cease our barbarity or be gone from this land. The answer to what happened next should be obvious - most of us, noblewomen and mistresses with their entourages, families, entire clans even, left. Some of us stayed. I was, for example, abandoned at just three years of age during the exodus. Those that remained took me in, raised me to be who I am today. Our matron Hakushin was one of the fair few who did not choose to participate in this cruelty and tried to fight back when we were exiled, to wrench at least one male from the claws of her kin. Kitsune Guuji chose to live a childless life of chastity in the name of those crushes in our claws. And she failed.”
“I see. I'm… I can't even imagine what he went through. How old is he?” The baku asks. 
“Six hundred years old. Can you picture that? Six centuries of slavery, torture, rape. Six centuries of being fed like a canine, kicked away or being forced upon. Six centuries… Tens of litters, either pried from your hands or never allowed to be there in the first place. A living nightmare. A hell that, for him, was reality.” She raises up and turns back towards Mizuki. “As for what he'd been through, we shall see.”
The woman freezes. What? Surely, Miko wouldn't be willing to metaphorically crowbar his mind open and see inside…
“Oh my, I can tell what's going on inside your head, Mizuki. Are you perhaps thinking I would violate his privacy without proper cause?” Miko turns, her gloomy expression now replaced with a light smirk. “Whoever do you take me for?”
Mizuki stands up and crosses her arms. “Sure, sure. I know you have a reason, but we'll see if it's convincing enough. I never force myself into any mind, and I wouldn't make an exception for you.”
“I understand. Let me tell you, then, why this course of action is not only the best, but also the necessary one. I doubt you understand the true scale of his mind's corruption. If things were, indeed, less severe, I would have just waited for him to rest and taken him to the bath house.”
Miko leans over you and places a hand over your forehead, checking the temperature. It's normal, making her breathe a sigh of relief. 
“When I caught up to him and had the rickety old house he hid in surrounded, I went in on my own. I didn't want to scare him, you see. Y/N pounced on me from the ceiling wielding a rusty knife. I shielded myself, making him fly across the room like a rag, collapsing into some shelves. He didn't surrender though - he rose up, coughing, and attacked me with his bare hands. I had to push back yet again, but this time he fell and did not strike again. Instead, I saw tears in his eyes. The words he spoke are why you are here.”
“Ugh…” You clutch your chest, trying in vain to stop the blunt ache from spreading across your body. The dust and sand raised by the commotion gets into your lungs - you cough. Her pink hair pierces through the colourless cloud of dust, slowly coming closer. 
Your hand desperately pats your closest surroundings in search of a weapon. Nothing. 
“Calm down, please.” She speaks, raising both her hands in an attempt to look less threatening. But you know these tricks like the back of your hand. Even the softest of tones can carry the most hateful of words. “I don't want to hurt you.”
“Liar! Do you think I'm… Ah… Stupid enough to believe you?!” You crawl back but soon feel the woodworm-chewed wood of the hut against your skin. There is no way out, but you won't go quietly. “What is this new torture? Did you find my screams and pleads boring enough for you to invade my dreams too? Do you think that you infesting my waking life is not enough?!”
She stops, her hands lowering. You can't see her face through the dust-caused tears, but she looks… disoriented. A soft “what” reaches your ears. 
“So that's how it is, Matsui. If you think you can fool me with a simple change of face and name, you're wrong. And if you think you can rape my mind too, you're mistaken! This is my dream, I have the power here! And I can do whatever I want. I can kill you. Or I can kill myself.” You look around, spotting a dusty razor blade, half-buried under the debris. You make sure not to look at it directly. “You may hurt me in the physical world, but you won't hurt me in the only safe haven I have left. Fuck you!”
Leaping forward towards the weapon, you quickly feel your body freeze in mid air. Thin, purple lightning wraps around your wrists, arms, ankles… You're stuck. You wiggle your fingers, desperately trying to reach your way out. Your proof of agency. Your display that you can influence what happens to you, that you’re not a mindless object. This simple tool that will break her toy once and for all. 
But regardless of your desires, Miko snares you with her elemental powers, just short of the razor. An ancient painting of helplessness and dread. 
“I hate you! I hate you!” You scream, ears folding in rage. “I hate you and everything you stand for!”
Miko doesn’t respond. She simply does not know if any word could convey the feelings brewing in her mind; neither the confusion about the reason for your outburst, nor the astonishment at just what came out of your mouth, are expressible. She observes you as your malnourished body trembles with rage, with hate. Vitriol rolls freely off your tongue. You call her every single insult you know in a hopeless attempt to… Scare her, make her back off, make her react somehow. The silence confuses you… Does she not want to kick you into shutting up? Your futile resistance against the bindings falters, wrath turning into hopeless sadness. Yet again you feel tears rolling down your face. 
“H-hate you… W-why…”
Your body is lowered back onto the floor and you immediately fall limp. The world, your past, your future and your present overwhelm your senses. You don’t want this, you never did. You didn’t plead in the face of Gods to let you come into this world, experience neither the pleasures, nor the pains of what surrounds you. You cannot deal with this yourself. You cannot be a hero. You cannot be an example that it’s possible, that you can endure anything and live on. You’re weak. 
So weak and witless that you can’t even kill yourself. 
You hear her shuffle closer to you. Normally you would move away from her, dodge her touch as best as you could. But this time your hands wrap around her loose sleeves and pull them closer. Before long your face nuzzles into her chest, attempting to hide from the world, even behind the one that hurt you so much. She strokes your hair, softly speaking to you in an attempt to ease your nerves, fruitlessly. Because, sobbing, you realise why you cling onto her so much. Even after she broke your tails, even after she broke your ribs, branded you, starved and humiliated and assaulted and belittled and objectified you. 
It’s because you have nobody else. 
Only her. Only Matsui. 
Mizuki listens intently to Miko’s report, her mind already picking apart your words and analysing it for potential basis. Her conclusions come swiftly and decidedly. 
“Derealisation”, she says. “Clear signs of post traumatic stress disorders, suicidal ideation and rock-bottom self esteem. Nod-Krai syndrome.”
“I’m unfamiliar with that. What does it mean?” Miko sits by your side, eyes boring into your unconscious face with a vague, hateful expression. She wants to hug you, shelter you from the world like she did just hours ago. But she would much more tear out the throat of Matsui, whoever she was - sky kitsune or a lowly fox, it did not matter. 
“Nod-Krai was conquered by the Cryo Archon, who quickly began decisive repressions against the local culture and ethnic identity.” Mizuki explains. “However, thanks to circumstances, local power play and propaganda, the native people of the land became thankful and loyal to their oppressor, the destroyer of altars and the murderer of entire villages. In the same exact way, Y/N seems to cling to Matsui - in this case, believing you’re her in disguise, despite everything she did to him in the past.”
Miko clenches her other hand, keeping the one on your shoulder soft and open. She nods. “I understand.”
There’s a moment of silence before the baku picks up the conversation. 
“Would you let me examine him?” She stands up. “I might not be a trained medic, but I think I can pick up some things you might have missed.”
The other woman, having shaken off the gloom of her memory, sends her friend a playfully indignant expression. 
“With respect to your own skill, Lady Guuji.” 
Miko smiles. “Ah, such compliments. In that case, you may have a look.”
Mizuki nods in thanks and takes the spot just freed by her host. Your defences seemed rather timid - the reason could be simple restraint or mercy, but judging by Miko’s accounts of your mistrust and paranoia, something else was at play. She guides her finger closer to your lips and carefully lifts up your lip, revealing perfectly tended, pristine teeth. Upon a closer look, she notices what exactly stands out among them. 
“His canines. They are filed down, see?” She opens your jaw a little, revealing just how even your teeth are, deprived of the four points in the corners. “The ends are imperfectly flat and there are small chips on the inside of each tooth. It could have been done with a simple nail file… I barely see red, meaning they must have been fairly long before.”
Ignoring the chills running down her spine from the mental image for curiosity’s sake, Miko leans in to get a better look. “Isn’t the pulp inside the entire tooth?”
“It is.” Mizuki nods. “But here it has a large circumference, meaning this is the base of the tooth.” Her own teeth hurt as if in solidarity with yours. “By the Shogun, I pray he wasn’t awake for this…”
Miko refrains from speaking to avoid words unbefitting of the Guuji slipping from her lips. The psychologist’s eyes wander down to your hands. The sight of perfectly clipped nails, so much so that they end with not the thinnest of white lines, seems odd to her. Surely after an extensive journey to Narukami Island by sea, and presumably no manicure from Miko, they would have grown even a little bit. She takes your left index finger into her hand and pauses right away. The nail… It’s not tough. To verify her suspicion, she scratches at it with her own fingernails, only to find that they meet no resistance. What’s more, something brown flakes off. Mizuki does this some more and proceeds to gather up the shavings onto her palm, turning around and presenting it to Miko. 
“Can you please tell me what they smell like?” She asks. “I touched his fingernails and they flaked off.”
Without question, Miko lifts Mizuki’s hand up to her nose and takes a careful whiff.
“Hm…” She muses. “His scent, sweat and… Leather? Yes. Tanned leather, the sort used for shoes.”
“Then it is just as I had feared. Miko, I think he’s been… Declawed, in a manner of speaking.” She presses your fingers into her arms, as hard as she can, but she feels no toughness digging into her skin. 
Miko’s heart begins to beat faster. “Declawed? Like a cat, you say? How is that even possible if he is in human form? Human nails grow all the time…”
“That’s a good question. I’d guess that the techniques they used to subdue dogs became advanced enough to do that. Even if it’s impossibly cruel… It’s impressive.” She shows your hand to Miko. “These painted strips of leather do look like normal fingernails.”
Your caretaker glances at your hand, then back at your peaceful face. It seems like your owners didn’t like their toy having any capability to fight back, or just show displeasure. Like a cat that paws anybody in defence or a dog, biting its cruel owner, you were stripped of your natural defences. She can already imagine it wasn’t enough - judging by how you acted, they tried to remove your very instinct to oppose and protect yourself. If not for this episode of confusion between dreams and the waking world, would she never see you fight back? Never see you refuse, stand your ground, all because whatever you could use was taken away and your mind was washed with cruelty and abuse to be unable to comprehend consent, self-preservation?
Most importantly…
Was this done to you right away, or as punishment…?
“I want to know. I want to see what he experienced.” Miko says, her brow furrowing. “He might not be able to tell me, but I must know. I must understand.”
Mizuki nods. “Give me a moment. We’ll see soon enough.”
In Miko’s gaze, resting on your limp, nailless, tortured hand, there is a promise. 
She’s coming for you. 
She’ll pick up the pieces and put you back together, however shattered you might be. 
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Thanks for reading!
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la-hannya · 1 year ago
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Also, like, this was the start of my Roman Empire
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marv-el-spot · 3 months ago
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FiLMS WATCHED IN 2025 EQUALS (2015) Dir. Drake Doremus
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dramoor · 16 days ago
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~Someone brought up that Jesus told His followers to turn the other cheek. This was not an exhortation to tolerance; it was the opposite of tolerance. It was actually an act of courage against an oppressive system of occupation by the Romans~
"The 'slap' in Matthew 5:39: In Jesus’ day, Israel was Roman occupied territory. If the Jews, as subjects of Rome, did not comply with a Roman soldier’s requests for anything from a drink of water to handing over personal property, a swift backhand to the right cheek was common. But why would Jesus instruct His followers to offer the left cheek as well? Paul T. Penley explains in 'Turning the Other Cheek: Jesus’ Peaceful Plan to Challenge Injustice,' 'Roman soldiers tended to be right-handed. When they struck an equal with a fist, it came from the right and made contact with the left side of the face. When they struck an inferior person, they swung with the back of their right hand making contact with the right cheek. In a Mediterranean culture that made clear distinctions between classes, Roman soldiers backhanded their subjects to make a point. Jews were second-class.' The Roman slap was an insult to the Jews’ personal dignity. In 'On Turning the Other Cheek (and How It Doesn’t Mean What You Think It Means),' Corey Far explained that a slap on the right cheek meant the soldier backhanded the Jews, which was a far more demeaning slap. 'It was degrading,' he said. 'It was what you gave to an inferior or a slave.' To not break down emotionally and simply turn the other cheek meant that the soldier couldn’t slap you again on the right cheek, and, Farr said, 'he can’t slap you with his left hand, because that is unclean for both of you.' The soldier’s only option was to slap with the palm of his hand, and 'this was not the way to slap a slave. This was reserved for equals.' Thus, in giving the other cheek, the degraded person asserted his humanity in a brave countermove — a humble response, yet also an act of courage against an oppressive system." ~Via BibleStudyTools.com ~Jesus' instruction to His disciples was not to tolerate evil, but to show that they were not overcome by it~
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verypersonalscreencaps · 3 months ago
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TOP 5 FIRST-TIME WATCHES OF JANUARY 2025
1. THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY (1996, dir. Jane Campion) 2. 12 ANGRY MEN (1957, dir. Sidney Lumet) 3. ALL I DESIRE (1953, dir. Douglas Sirk) 4. EQUALS (2015, dir. Drake Doremus) 5. LANGUE ÉTRANGÈRE (2024, dir. Claire Burger)
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thewintersoldatt · 1 year ago
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TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN - RAFE CAMERON (finish or nah?)
pairing: toxic!rafe cameron x toxic!reader
summary: you’ll find out hehe.
warnings: none yet.
a/n: welp! this is just a sneak peek maybe??? tell me what you guys think. 🤔
word count: idk yet
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“I fucking hate you.”
And he couldn’t stand you. Yet he was sure that he loved you more than he’d ever loved another person. At times, you suffocated him, and he was nothing more than a possessive lunatic. He wanted nothing more than to push you away, but Rafe knew that he’d be alone if he did that. If there was one thing that was constant in his life, it was you. You, who doted on him, cared for him when no one else would. If everyone else turned their backs on him, you stayed. Even though you made it quite clear you weren’t planning on going anywhere, and so did he. "No, you don’t."
He said softly, pressing his face into your hair. “You want to, but you can’t.”
Rafe's face drifted closer to your neck, “and you want to know how I know?” 
“How?” You whispered, while he pulled away, cupping your face in his hands.
“Because we’re two sides of the same coin, baby.”
You wanted to forget about the hurt and turmoil. You wanted to throw yourself against him, to fall from his tightrope and just feel the exhilaration of anything other than the endless heartbreak, love, and hatred that formed the so-called-relationship.
“I do love you. You know that right?”  
Whatever love was meant to be, wasn’t this. You knew that and so did Rafe.
But the thing was, no matter how much suffering the two of you put each other through, it didn’t matter because you knew how this would end. The never-ending cycle of you physically pushing him away. Him slapping you across the face. The two of you apologizing which lead to the rough make up sex. Both of you craved the attention and love that you were denied, so you’d found it in each other. In the worst possible way imaginable. You obsessed over the control you had over him, and he relished the control he had over you. “I love you too.” You were almost ashamed of how breathless your voice came out sounding. "I can leave if you want.”  He let his head fall to rest on your shoulder. “Do you want me to?” You closed your eyes, savoring every breath he took. His hands were soft on your waist, holding you carefully. Letting out a shuddering breath you mumbled, “no.”  
Rafe was right. You were two sides of the same coin, two halves of one whole, and each other's only equals. 
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multibodied · 1 year ago
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This is rk1k btw:
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the reason I don’t write much even though I like writing, is the same reason I don’t sing much even though I like singing.
I don’t like the sound of my own voice.
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theidiotwhowrites · 1 year ago
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𝑪𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝑨𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒄𝒓𝒂𝒕
𝐵𝑦𝑎𝑘𝑢𝑦𝑎 𝑇𝑜𝑔𝑎𝑚𝑖 𝑥 𝐹𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑟 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟
Equals
(Story is related to this post I made, lol Togami won by a landslide)
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Warning;
Rude comments, Classism, Pre Despair Arc, Reader comes from a financially unstable household (broke), Rivals to lovers (slow burn?), Reader with a fencing background, Slow start, Arguing, Multipart. Kinda petty Reader (Aren't we all tho?)
You have been warned
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Hope's Peak Academy
was the most prestigious private institution where anyone could go to, fortunately, you were accepted but for you, it was a bittersweet moment.
Everyone praised you all you could think about was leaving your life behind.
Fencing is what you had that didn't let you down and now it would have been thrown aside.
You finally felt like you did something, made your family proud but it didn't feel right.
All those days you've practiced for your upcoming tournament felt like a waste.
Sleep, School, Fencing, Rinse and Repeat It was routine, the thought of breaking from it didn't sit right with you.
It wouldn't for anybody, yet. You were supposed to be grateful and not "whine" about it but how could you when what you held dear was getting stripped away you weren't an Ultimate with a mind-blowing talent; Ultimates are what the school called their most gifted and breathtaking students,
(Your fencing skills weren't all that)
Unlike them it didn't change lives, it didn't inspire hope and technically you also weren't a 'Proper Reserve Course' student by definition, being that you didn't pay your way in.
Maybe the school's leaderboard took pity on you and accepted you only because of your academics.
Maybe they have an ulterior motive.
Nobody Knows.
Standing in front of the tall building, blue pillars from behind peak out catching the corner of your eyes.
You walk through the gates but that was 2 months ago...
Now you lie awake in your dorm, boring and plain are the decorations. The only spark it has is what you added which wasn't much since you weren't able to.
The days passing by started turning into mirrored images of the last.
It is better than wondering about what you were going to eat today or if there's any water or something added to the unpredictable chaos of poverty.
You weren't your class's top student.
(mostly given that the ones that were bribed the teachers into giving them better marks)
Or had close friends of any kind from the school.
You simply laid low. Invisible.
Staying in the background, with the spotlight never gracing your face for no longer than a second...
...Till...
The speakers called your name. Echoing throughout the empty halls. The stares from the others you didn't see, you felt, buried in the back of your skull.
All eyes were focused on you while you packed your things and said your temporary goodbyes.
Sprinting, you rush towards the headmaster's office. Slowly knocking on the door, opening it with shaky hands.
"Don't worry, you're not in trouble" Says the headmaster; Jin Krigri, next to his right sits another man one that's quite unfamiliar,
"Before your arrival, the school did a background check on you as we do with all our students."
He shifts his chair
"And I was informed that you had done extracurricular activities. So to make you feel more welcomed, I took it upon myself to give you that chance again".
Endorphins filled with excitement lace through your veins. This was your redemption, a second chance. The thought of it makes you wanna shout for joy. You felt like you were overflowing with bliss and swimming in happiness.
If you signed up, another competition would be in your grasp. To be able to do what was taken from you. Being awarded, adored, standing in front of a stage whilst the crowd cheers for you, holding a medal you earned.
It's almost too much to bear.
Almost.
"Why?" You question. It didnt make sense, there has to have some repercussions. Opportunities like these don't come without them. There is something that lurk beneath such a pretty offer.
A faint smile crosses the stranger's lips as Mr Kirigri speaks up again.
"I did expect that you are a smart student after all. In return, all I ask is if you continue your fencing journey with a new coach..." He gestures to his right.
"Coach Tsukuda" The man interjects, standing up from his chair before calmly walking over, and putting one of his hands in front of him.
Hesitantly, you shake it.
Mr Tsukuda's, hands are rough to the touch, lacking any moisture with it. Bumpy like an unrepaired road, It's an unpleasant feeling against your own but you don't feel the need to decline.
To not be impolite, of course.
"It's is a pleasure to meet you," He remarked.
"Ahem" Mr Krigri clears his throat, drawing attention back to him.
"As I was saying, if you choose to make the conscious choice to accept this proposal by joining our fencing club, all I ask in return is if you compete in a tournament overseas with your fellow members, you as well as them to talk about the school in a positive light. Too nudge our reputation in the right direction."
He puts heavy emphasis on the word right.
In other words, Mr Krigri wants you to make the school look good. It was nothing short of unsurprising. Playing only a pawn in the time-consuming game of social climbing.
You agreed to such conditions. Being the school's talking puppet for a moment in time is better than the constant agony of boredom and longing for excitement. Some may disagree but it is a price willing to be paid.
The next day painfully went by.
Seconds turned into minutes.
Minutes turned into hours and at this rate, you felt like you were going to rip your hair out by the roots as the hands of time perceived to move slower and slower and even slower.
The bell rings, ending your torment.
Lazily, you turn the metal handle mounted on the wooden door, walking inside.
Yanking the strap of the duffle bag, destined to be forgotten before today, pulling it over your shoulder, leaving from whence you came.
Hope's peak was undoubtedly beautiful. A perfect muse for photography. However its only flaw are the stairs, You trance your index finger over the matte black railing. It is such a tedious experience but how else were you going to get there?
After what feels like forever, you stand before the Gymnatorium.
The temporary room for the fencing club. It calls your name like a siren song.
Spacious
It's the first thing you notice, the room is elegant yet simplistic. Gym equipment is neatly placed in the corners of the room.
Everyone talked in their own flock, mingling with their friends. Selectivity amongst others. Everyone except one.
Silently reading on a bench with a scowl on his face. Blonde hair falls to his face as a white-gloved hand fixes his hair. For a second they look up, his eyes connecting with yours.
The door behind you creaked behind you, ripping you from your thoughts. Making you look at the source of the sound
Coach Tsukuda stands in front of the door, he signals you to come closer. A sense of unease washes over you.
"You're here," He says, his voice lacking surprise, simply pointing out facts. He pauses to think of his next words.
"How good would you say you were at fencing before now?" Odd.
You shrugged. Doubt clouds your next judgment.
You thought you were good but are you?. Are you actually or were the people you were surrounded with weren't any better? Questioning your abilities.
"I don't know, good I guess" Was your response. Being humble about your talents. Maybe they were good but I didn't earn you a title. You still weren't an ultimate.
"Why do you ask?" You added. Not really sure where he was going with this.
"I've been thinking. That's our best fencer-" Coach points at the blonde on the bench, who continues to read. Not noticing that he is the object of your conversation.
"He thinks he lacks any competition and truth be told he's not wrong and you haven't showcased your skills to me, go and put on your gear, I'll be back to you in a second"
You oblige. Putting on your gear you notice, it's tight.
You are still able to move somewhat comfortably but it feels strange. Perhaps it's from the length of time you haven't worn it or you just need a new one. You toss your uniform in your bag.
Out of the changing rooms. You see Mr Tsukuda who stands next to the boy on the bench, signalling you to come towards them. Well, he's off of the bench now so you can't call him that anymore. You should ask what his name is.
Standing on the safety mat, it's a peculiar feeling under your shoes.
Mr Tsukuda's gestures to you
"This is who you will be fighting against, nothing drastic, best of five hits. "
The coach steps to the side and steps forward, to the boy.
He looks you up and down. Sapphire eyes studying your body. Judging every inch of you.
The tension is thick. To distract from it, you try to introduce yourself.
"Uhhh, Hi my name is-" Try, he cuts you off.
"I know who you are, I have not the energy to entertain this discussion you plan on conjuring with me, commoner. Let's get this over with. You will lose either way."
His tongue is razor sharp, cutting into you, deep. Dripping with disdain.
What is his problem? Did he wake up on the wrong side of life or something? He had not only rejected your advances but as well as insulted you in the same breath.
Tough Crowd.
So sure that he's better. It doesn't matter to you who does but now you want to, to win, simply push it in his face. To mess with his sense of arrogance.
You scuff at his remark. Glaring at his monotone expression.
He grabs what seems random to be a random épeé however it has an interesting design, one you haven't seen before.
Like any sport fencing has rules, mostly with its equipment. Every fencing sword has its own set of rules. Foil, only being able to touch your competitor's torso. Saber, allowing you to hit your opponent's waist up, only. However, the Éppé is the easiest to remember, having free range.
Grabbing your éppé, you get in a stance. He makes one last swift movement as he puts on his mask.
"Start!" The words echo through your ears. With a quick pace, he lunges towards you. You raise your blade. Swords clashing together, stepping back. Maintaining momentum, dodging his attacks. The tip of the blade touches your chest. "I suggest you give up, to prevent the shame of your inevitable loss."
"Shut up...." You mutter under your breath, he seems to be getting to you. "En garde!"
The contrast of your outfits becomes more clear. A dry taste fills your mouth. Adrenaline rushes through your brain. Under your gloves, sweat drips from your palms. Your next moves are calculated. You swung, A slash against his waist stops him in his tracks. Gaining you a point.
"Wanna give up?" You taunted, mocking his previous statement.
You can hear his teeth clench under his mask as he makes his next attack. You move your blade. Determined. Both blades swing left to right.
Your eyes scan over the room, glassed over. The sleeves feel like they dig into your wrist.
Faces close to each. Weapons stranded against each other. Looking for an opening. A thud rings out, as he lands to the floor. The sound of your heartbeat fills your ears.
You hit him with one final strike, and simultaneously the metal of the sword hit your leg with force.
"Take a break" Coach says.
He gets up from the floor, brushing the dirt off of him. Dropping it without a care, leaving.
Your hands feel sore to the touch. He comes to a sharp halt. Standing there before he utters. For the first time in his life, he has met an equal. A person on the same level as him.
"Byakuya Togami...."
"Excuse me?" You say, taking off your mask.
"Byakuya Togami.....it's my name, considering you asked earlier. However, do not think for a moment this means I am willing to fraternize with you."
Oh....So he's not so cold after all?
... To be continued ...
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Should I continue this?
I can't believe this took me a month, it feels like nobody write about fencing even though it's such an interesting sport and I say this purely off research. Where I live we don't have that so I have no prior experience.
And when people write about fencing in media, it's very overlooked. It's kinda like a place holder for time rather than the main plot point but whatever.
Also shout out to the people who supported me on this long adventure. (You know who you are)
Thank you for reading, it is really appreciated. (◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍)⁠ノ⁠♡
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loser-man-central · 1 year ago
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Lemme introduce you to
Bootday
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Cowboys were mostly Christian and Sunday is based on an angel
And what are angels usually associated with?? CHRISTIANITY
I imagine there's a scene where Sunday is getting shot by someone with his back turned and Boothill just spawns bites the bullet zoom in on his face to show he bit it and spit it out
Because Boothill is good boy and he gives the vibes of someone who would hire a speeding bullet
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gingergofastboatsmojito · 11 months ago
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Have we all stopped for a sec to think that the man is doing all that for her and he's not even fucking her?
Because I have.
Can you imagine how he will be like with her once they move to the next level? What is he gonna do? Climb the Everest for her?! I'm a little bit concerned, to be honest. But then I remember this:
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She's the same, just hides it better.
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contentloadingandstuff · 3 months ago
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What would you like to see in Equals III?
Since Equals isn't really meant to be a proper narrative like Mortuarius (if anybody still remembers it - by the way, a remake from ground up is in the works), I'm very open to requests when it comes to topics and interactions. I think it would have more potential as a sort of AU for me to write in. So, comment down below or throw your ideas into the asks - as always, I will look into each one.
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raurquiz · 12 days ago
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#happybirthday #kristenstewart #actress #snowwhiteandthehuntsman #Twilight #theTwilightsaga #newmoon #eclipse #BreakingDawn #Sacramento #LoveMe #LoveLiesBleeding #CrimesoftheFuture #Spencer #HappiestSeason #Underwater #CharliesAngels #PersonalShopper #Equals #AmericanUltra #Stillalice
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unabashedqueenfury · 3 months ago
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Reign 2013-17
Mary and Francis
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