solaireanguilla

[menagerie-politics]

"kill all men" is a disgusting message that doesn't actually contribute to feminism. Yes, all men benefit from the patriarchy, but NO, not all men should be killed or jailed just because most rapists and criminals are men. You cannot say "But if it's not all men then it's their friends" as if all men intentionally work together to hurt women. That's just not true. And you don't know everything your friends do, so don't expect the same from men (although yes, men should be taught to shut down sexist jokes and behaviors when they see it in their friend groups). Stop trying to justify it, even if it's a joke, it reduces men to their gender and supports violence on that basis. Any message that generalizes people for things they cannot control, and uses that generalization to justify violence will NEVER actually promote equality. I want to end the system; not the people. Free the oppressed; not eliminate the privileged.

It's not "kill all whites" it's black lives matter.

It's not "straights are sinful" it's love is love.

"Kill all men" doesn't focus on women, so why is it so prevalent in feminist spaces. Is kill all men the world you want to move towards? I cannot speak for all feminists, but I want a world where women get treated with respect they deserve as humans, simply because as humans, that is the default. I want a world where equality knows no gender. I want a world where empowered women get to empower the world. I want KAM as an idea to die out and I want "my body is my choice" to become as obvious a statement as "the sky is blue". I want "my place is wherever I go" to be so normal that it's redundant to say it. I want a world where "no" has no rebuttals, and that is simply a fact of life. I want a world where safe spaces are unnecessary because everywhere is safe. But until we get there, I want my message to tell the world exactly what I want. "Kill all men" isn't doing anything helpful, it's just helping feed the demonization of feminist movements. We should be focusing our energy on uplifting women and making sure abusive men are held accountable for their abusive actions.

And side-note in case terfs find this: I've lived most of my life with society assuming I'm a woman and treating me accordingly. I've been affected by misogyny (and misogynoir) for most of my life, and I've read books and taken classes on the oppression of women both in the past and present. I have researched the history of feminist movements in multiple parts of the world. I lived it, I've learned it, and I will not let anyone invalidate my knowledge or experiences.

[tahopo]

we truly regressed when people started buying into the genderbending is inherently transphobic thing. yeah that twelve year old being inquisitive and having fun on deviantart was your enemy all along.

[sp00ky-scary]

she puts estrogen in the Gotham water supply /j

[theposhperyton]

All evidence suggests yes

[saint-ambrosef]

Perpetually side-eyeing the fact that modesty/dress code rules for girls are always a half mile long list detailing what they can or can't wear head to toe, and then the rules for men list a max of like... two things. Wonder why that is.

[sky-scribbles]

So my niece, who is eleven, found out that I'm nonbinary (actually, she cornered me and said 'what is your gender??', which. fair. I've not been subtle). I told her I wasn't out to most of our family yet, and wasn't using they/them pronouns or my chosen name around them yet, so she could use those in private but not around everyone else.

And this kid. This kid has been taking every possible opportunity to call me by my chosen name when no one else will hear. Things like whispering in my ear 'hey [chosen name], can you pass me the water?' Yelling 'bye everyone!' to the family and when whispering just to me 'bye [chosen name]!' Coming into my room and immediately saying 'Hi *very pointedly* [chosen name]!!!'

The kids are all right.

[duckapus]

Idea: one of those "Ash somehow ends up in a group chat (usually with the Champions or Legendaries, sometimes with other characters) the first day of his journey and it messes with the series" AUs that've been popping up on AO3 lately, but instead it's a group chat made up of alternate versions of himself. One of them's the canon version (or at least close to it), the rest are AU versions, at least one of them is Ashley (not sure if trans or just genderbent. leaning towards trans), and all of them are from post-series and trying not to give too many spoilers because they don't want to overwhelm their "mini-me" or make things too easy for him 'cause if they do he won't grow as a trainer and person like they did (not that he'd want them to coddle him like that anyway. He's always wanted to get through on his own merits not have victories just handed to him). Also Arceus told them not to (who else do you think would've set this up?).

Granted, sometimes even when they do give spoilers it doesn't help much between them not having perfect memories, being from alternate timelines so a lot of the details are different between them, and forgetting just how stubborn and bull-headed their Kanto Era self could be.

I call it the "Self-Help Hotline" AU

[halohalona]

ah ok so we bisexuals and pansexuals have to prove to you that we are also attracted to the same gender by being in a romantic/sexual relationship with the same gender?

i didn't know that was a requirement

[sweaters-and-vertigo]

so if children don’t need gender affirming care, maybe they don’t need gender roles either?

[variousqueerthings]

tbh the "male-presenting" comment on doctor who isn't such a big surprise, and kinda does highlight a moment in time rn where in more progressive circles we're still struggling with binary and gender-essentialist assumptions around what we perceive to be "masculinity as something bad" whether it be trans men, non-binary people who don't present femme "enough," intersex people with facial hair and/or other so-called "masculine" features, butches and studs, trans women who "don't pass in the right way" or aren't out, questioning people, and any number of people who exist within gender and sex squiggly spaces, and don't feel welcome because of faux-progressive language constantly trying to redefine who we can exclude and what the oppression hierarchy looks like (women+, women and nb, femmes and thems, afab and amab as shorthand replacing woman and man, male- and female- "presenting", etcetc) rather than actually dismantling/liberating these structures

the ick feeling ive seen a lot of people have with it is neat to see, but it's not a moment that exists in an ignorant vacuum, it very much does echo things we need to be unpacking irl within our own communities and it should lead people to really go into "well what is it about it that comes off as so wrong, especially as the rest of the episode is very trans positive, and are those assumptions things that exist within my own perception of trans equality"?

yeah, hope to see more inclusiveness in the show moving forwards, and also irl moving forwards, because that was a reflection

[mantisgodsdomain]

Now that we are being followed by people, we need to make some thoughts and opinions clear so that people are not later Shocked And Disgusted or whatever by thoughts we have held for many years. We think it's weird and also bad to treat queer people like they're a different species from cishet people, and we think that treating things like Having A Sexuality makes a character better than if they have a different sexuality is bad no matter what way you put it.

We also think that, if in your setting queer folks are widely accepted and straight isn't a "default", it may be worth noting that, say, a straight woman might need just as much self-discovery to work out she's straight that a lesbian does nowadays. In the same manner that, in Ace Attorney, Larry Butz needs to tell Phoenix that no matter how many photos of handsome men he shows him, he's tried, he's just not attracted to men,

[batri-jopa]

bisexual: attraction to more than one gender

pansexual: attraction to all genders

F version (M -> HERE)

After I got sooo much lovely positive responses to my aro/ace pictures (both the fem and masc version) - I finally decided to try and make this style into a bigger queer series, hoping to spread even more positivity! 💜💙🩵💚💛🧡❤

[francisforever2014]

recent obsession is the notes on the men being ugly poll. apparently saying men are ugly is terf rhetoric . “saying yes is crazy we love men here!” some of us are lesbians…….. “i actually think NOBODY is ugly 🥰🥰” okay do you want a medal damn

[quantumghosts]

they really looked at the man who survived 40+ years alone in an apocalypse and 3 whole seasons of constantly, DESPERATELY, SINGLE-MINDEDLY trying to save his family... and then had him give up after 7 years where he had actual human company this time to help keep his sanity, and then made him a fucking homewrecker?????? this man had literally only TWO THINGS he cared about and now suddenly he's abandoned them both lmfao what the FUCK

[mezimraky]

i don't wanna get cursed with the popular post notes but someone should do a poll abt the creaking & enderman ship (is it yaoi? is it yuri? polycule with the warden? fourth secret fucked up thing?)

[skrunksthatwunk]

you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.

you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.

so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.

you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.

you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.

you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.

you know you broke the rule by interacting.

but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.