#envy tends to get quite mean when in pain.

[s-talking]

@tigermcth: ⠀⠀ the stranger’s near immediate recovery produces a cold shudder to spread rapidly throughout his body, and the desperate attempt to escape proved futile. &&. it was only when he caught sight of an encroaching hand that his head jerks back against textured wood with a thud. jeoh grits his teeth as he feels nails, unnaturally sharp, drag across the flushed skin of his cheeks, leaving raised lines that exuded ichor. he’s only given a moment of relief when his lips & jaw are inspected, the razor-sharp sensation only returning when they dig into his neck. ⠀⠀ ❝ tsk!! ❞ he wriggles, body finally showing some resistance, but not enough that could compete with the inhuman strength & speed of the opposing. ❝ let me go, ❞ parted lips rasped, mortified as his frame is constricted by lithe appearing arms, the prominent popping sound of the bones igniting more adrenaline that still wasn’t doing shit-all to assist overpowering the other’s grip. ❝ you goddamn bastar—ah ! ❞ teeth break through the skin & muscles of jeoh’s neck, the rest of him contracting as the stranger took whatever he wanted which jeoh presumed was his life.

⠀⠀ being flushed against this stranger the scent of poppies tickle at the sensory hairs in his nose, allowing a spurt of serotonin to fire off in his brain, aiding him to relax against the strain which alleviated some of the pain. from there, his mind submerge itself into the same acceptance he often resulted in similar moments of helplessness. often, his survival superseded his pride, because it was always control they wanted. submitting, or at least giving the impression he was,was what usually kept him breathing. defining whether this was just that or true acceptance couldn’t be distinguished, not even in his own mind where thoughts slowed & muddled together. ⠀⠀ with cheek flush against the pale neck of his assailant, a whine crawls out from the back of his throat, sounding more like a plea than a reaction to pain. ❝ oppa— please~ ❞ eyelids, which now felt as though anchors were attached to them, fall closed as he faints.

𝐀 𝐃𝐄𝐄𝐏, 𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐇𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 & 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐂 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐃𝐄𝐕𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐎𝐑 𝐋𝐀𝐌𝐁 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐒 seduces the young serial killer, charming him, beguiling him to keep on going despite the ensuing struggle, the warmth of jeoh's blood pouring down his wicked tongue like sun-kissed nectar, ❝ mnnhhh..... ❞ & it's delicious. so much so, the long fangs sink even deeper, tearing into the boy's yielding flesh with sheer ease before hooking in.

       it'd be just so easy to rip him apart.

to make him scream & writhe between his clenching teeth, but that miserable plea.... it catches envy off-guard. he slowly withdraws his fangs from the bleeding punctures, lapping at them once more with a sleek tongue before pulling back just enough to stare at that doll-like face. my, poor thing, he thinks; i should have just ripped his throat out instead....

becoming somewhat disappointed by own choice of action, the young serial killer smiles without any real emotion behind those cold dead eyes, glistening blood trickling from his elegant chin & jaw in thick droplets. ❝ ..... ... ❞ such a pity, indeed. envy always liked to see them suffer before dying. oh well. suddenly lifting jeoh off the ground, envy fixes his unconscious body over own broad shoulder & most nonchalantly turns back towards the spade left behind; a physical manifestation of things done & things still waiting to be done, their list seemingly ever-growing much like own impatience at this point.

ah, what he wouldn't do for a smoke right now. still, not wishing to keep grandmother waiting, the young serial killer steps back into the cold rain & its pelleting bullets, yanking the spade out with one quick pull before returning to the path leading home, the dark house illuminated by flashes of thunder.

by the time joah wakes again, he'll find himself blindfolded & bound by ropes around his wrists & feet, his body on top of what feels like wooden planks. a musty scent of dust pilfering the stagnant air, accompanied by the hushed pitter-patter of rain & a heavy sense of grim reality slowly settling in...

[etirabys]

a few days ago I wrote down, somewhere, "unstable superhero who just got rescued from captivity and torture / the only superhero who's strong enough to subdue him after release"

and it ballooned out into something I want to share, whether or not I go any further with it:

okay here's what I have. Everyone was in like, mutant academy as a kid . Leith, the "only superhero strong enough to subdue the unstable prisoner after rescue", was not obviously very powerful in those times (think really late-blooming Jean Grey).

Leith had ideological disagreements with the popular kids, plus some behavioral issues, that almost led to their expulsion several times. This dynamic continued into the adult hero league.

When Leith really came into their powers (not sure if before or after adult hero league period) there was a lot of scared debate. People immediately saw them as a threat in a way they wouldn't have seen other more compliant members. Around this time people start calling them Worldbreaker, which sticks.

They co-save the world once or twice and then angrily quit because of the Hostile Work Environment. They become a rare book collector or something and pointedly stay out of superhero affairs. Even when, satisfyingly, their old colleagues come to their door begging!

Many years later, the head of the adult superhero league (and Leith's old classmate) is captured by enemies, tortured, and is definitely not the same on return. Tends to wreck stuff / attack in a panic / bring down buildings during nightmares, etc.

(Their captor might even have been an alternate universe version of Leith, who didn't get 'defeated' so much as got the dimensional portal closed on them)

After a lot of argument, the league decides to entrust not!Superman (tempnamed Aegis in this fic) to Leith. Aegis was one of the mass of friendly-with-each-other-but-not-with-Leith people making Leith's school years painful, but was one of the nicer ones. They had some good interactions. Possibly Aegis even had a bit of a crush on Leith, envied them for their defiance / composure / self-knowledge.

Aegis was popular enough to have made life much nicer for Leith if he'd spoken up in support, but he never did – he was too insecure, too raw from his own pre-academy ostracism, to stick his neck out like that. Leith resents Aegis for this more than they resent the more straightforwardly hostile students.

In adulthood Aegis came into his own and turned out to have the combination of charisma, people skills, organizational skills, and raw power to be the best candidate to head the adult hero league when the old leader stepped down.

Which of course makes Leith even angrier! It's hard for Leith to really see how precarious Aegis felt in his school days when adult Aegis is running fucking everything. When Aegis took power, Leith started retrospectively hallucinating Aegis as having had more responsibility/influence in the school days because of his present stature, and deepened into their bitterness.

Leith was part of the rescue team that got Aegis out, but was very "it's just ONCE, you assholes CANNOT use this as a door-crack to recruit me into more stuff, give me a BILLION dollars. I do NOT like Aegis by the way" about it.

When they finally find and extract Aegis in terrible shape, naked and bleeding and shaking, Leith just crosses their arms and looks cold about it, which of course makes everyone mad.

(spoiler: Leith is not unaffected)

And then they go home and have to be outraged all over again when, a month later, the other supers come knocking at their door saying "please… he has destroyed TWO psychiatric hospitals… help"

Some text:

"Worldbreaker likes it when we grovel, they string us along and then they oh-so-graciously deign to help –"

"Paige, we wouldn't have gotten Nathan out without Worldbreaker. Forget about their attitude and focus on that. They showed up. They opened the portal. Then they shut it for good. They made an exception to their rule because we asked. That means everything."

Paige had looked away. The memory that she was having trouble letting go of, which Luminarch would of course have no patience for, was of Worldbreaker's face when they'd dragged Nathan out of hell. Naked, bleeding, shivering – and worst of all, conscious. Worldbreaker had taken one look at the greatest hero on Earth and their lip had curled. Their arms had crossed. Their body language had said, this? I canceled my afternoon tea with a Czech book dealer for this?

Worldbreaker, waiting at the door, had some of the same sneer now.

"Fifty million dollars," they said again.

"It was wired to you an hour ago," Paige said coldly. Worldbreaker was fantastically rich from dealing paintings and books across the multiverses. They by no means needed that money.

Worldbreaker gave Nathan a look and said, equally coldly, "Is he at least continent?"

Paige wanted to slap him. "And what of it if he isn't? You can telekinetically get rid of it."

"To what universe? What of the bacteria in his waste? Am I to set off microbial genocide in some alien pond?" Worldbreaker examined their perfectly buffed nails. "I prefer to be a little more responsible than that."

The jab hurt. The league – no, she and her team specifically – had destroyed a few universes by accident, in their beginner days. One of those things that didn't seem real until 2am, when she was tossing and turning and suddenly remembered: all those zeroes. Worldbreaker, despite their name, never had. Mostly thanks to sheer fucking inaction.

Nathan said, "Hello, Leith."

"Hello, Aegis," said Worldbreaker. Their tone somehow dropped a few degrees Kelvin. "Welcome to my home. I'll show you into the guest room."

"Thanks," said Nathan, gingerly approaching the threshold. "Sorry for the inconvenience."

"We're paying him fifty million dollars, don't worry about it," Paige said acerbically, but Nathan just winced, and she felt terrible. Nathan had never adjusted to being rich. He could reason about moving a billion dollars around fine, when it was for work. In his personal life he fussed about paying five hundred dollars to get his couch replaced. He'd grown up poor. Worldbreaker had too, come to think, but they clearly had no issue buying up a mansion and filling it up with fripperies.

"Thanks for dropping him off," Worldbreaker said curtly, and gave Nathan a little shove into the house. Paige watched him with a sense of doom. Worldbreaker turned to her and said, "Get off my property."

Paige opened her mouth angrily, but the pure hate on Worldbreaker's face shut her up. It was somehow hard to remember that Worldbreaker was, in fact, probably the single most powerful person in the universe and the few neighboring it. He had been little annoying Leith for so long in the old days, barely making the cutoff for admission, running his mouth anyway like his opinion mattered more than anyone else's. "Take care of him," she said, or at least started saying. She blinked at the hull of the international space station, the shadow she was casting on it from several hundred feet away. The sun was very hot on her back with no atmosphere to shield her.

What an asshole. She oriented herself and flew towards headquarters, in orbit just a few thousand miles away.

[gaiaxygang]

but it still appears we’re both youths

chopperben, mainly ben pov. bunch of ben introspection. 1.4k+ words in 6 parts.

1. Chopper is beautiful.

It's a thought that comes to Ben occasionally, one he's afraid of. He's barely accepted his own attraction to men, and he doesn't want to think about what it means for him to feel butterflies in his stomach whenever his best friend speaks. Especially not when he'd turned said best friend down when he confessed his own not-so-platonic feelings.

Chopper is soft, gentler than the son of such a violent man should be. He's kind, the warmth that radiates from his fingertips near incomprehensible to someone like Ben, who only knows how to keep people at a distance.

Ben likes his protective side, too. It makes him feel special, almost, to see someone like Chopper jump into fights to defend him. Seeing how Chopper moves, precisely striking their classmates—not to hurt, but to defend—Ben has never been more certain that Chopper is one of the most beautiful men he's ever seen.

Ben doesn't want to admit these feelings. The walls have eyes, and not even a place like school is safe, not for these kinds of emotions to be expressed. Above all, he's scared because it's Chopper. Ben doesn't know how to deal with someone who can be so vulnerable, doesn't have it in him to be soft.

So until he's ready, he'll bury his feelings deep down, like he always does.

2. Chopper and Ben have nothing in common.

Ben loves music. It's what fills his heart, what keeps him going when he feels like there's no reason to continue. The warm tones of the piano and the varied sounds of the guitar have saved him more than once, easing the pain in his heart. It's why he took on the role of student council president despite his lack of interest, a compromise with his father in exchange for permission to study music.

Chopper knows nothing about music. His fingers were never agile enough to play an instrument, and music theory might as well be a foreign language to him. Instead, he prefers dealing with numbers and statistics. Ben never quite understood those, either. Their passions don't match at all, so conversations tend to run dry quickly.

(It was easier for Ben to connect with Nueng because they we're both, in their own ways, saved by music. They bonded fast over classical, discussing their favourite musicians alone in corners of the school. Ben was better at guitar than piano, though.)

3. They're both lonely.

Ben hates to admit that it was a sense of loneliness that drew him and Chopper to each other. He'd struck up a conversation with Chopper early in the year in 10th grade just to be polite, but soon realised Chopper didn't speak to anyone else other than his cousin.

Soon, small conversations turned to hours spent at each other's sides after school. They'd walk around, Chopper would follow Ben into instrument stores and Chopper would explain things like the stock market to Ben, with little success. Ben was careful to not let his hands linger too long on Chopper's shoulders, never to get too physically intimate lest their friendship be mistaken as something else.

There's always a hesitance when they part ways. Ben doesn't like spending time at home, never able to breathe quite right under his father's roof. Ever since he expressed his interest in music, he's felt like he was constantly walking on eggshells in his own house. His father doesn't like it, doesn't like that Ben loves something he deems as not masculine enough. So he tries his best not to step out of line and anger him, and there's no better way to do that than by not being home at all.

Ben soon finds out that Chopper shares his feelings about home. It's not exactly the same, but they're able to connect through it. They know that fear of their own guardians isn't supposed to be something they share, not something they should have to go through at all. Yet they're both glad they're not alone in it.

(Ben sometimes envies how Chopper is able to talk back to his father. Chopper only really hesitates when the safety of other people he loves is at risk, but he's brave enough to try and question his father's methods. It's something a coward like Ben cannot even dream of doing.)

4. Chopper is like a hero to him.

Chopper never leaves Ben's side. Ben isn't good at showing his care, doesn't know how to get closer to people. Despite how hard he knows he is to love, Chopper never leaves. He has so much love to give inside him, and doesn't mind if Ben barely reciprocates. He talks Ben through his bleaker moments, even if Ben can't do the same for him.

In a way, he's become like Ben's personal hero. Ben hates that he can't ever say the right words or do the right things when Chopper needs it, and can't understand why Chopper won't leave him behind. It's a truth so deeply ingrained in him, that he isn't suited for loving. The sky is blue, the sun rises from the East, and Ben will never truly be loved.

(It stung when Chopper started to keep his distance. Ben thought he'd made it clear that he wanted to stay friends, but when it comes to things like feelings, he's never certain if his thoughts are conveyed properly.)

Chopper sees Ben as the Sun. He's always shining bright and smiling, almost untouchable. He extends kindness to everyone he meets, and glows when he plays guitar or piano. It's no surprise that Chopper falls in love. Ben is everything he admires in human form, a bright light that never seems to go out. It's almost too good to be true.

When he gets closer to Ben, he realises that he's wrong. He's still correct in the sense that Ben is like the Sun, but he's wrong because Ben is like the Sun but only in ways Chopper didn't imagine. So much of Ben's warmth is a farce, a front he puts on in hopes of being accepted. Ben's words when he confesses scorch his heart and leave behind a burn scar, one that doesn't go away no matter how much ointment Chopper applies.

(He doesn't blame Ben for it. He'd figured out that Ben was bad with words a long time ago. Chopper only has himself to blame for flying so close to the sun.)

5. Chopper is vulnerable.

Ben first catches a glimpse of it in 10th grade, when Chopper's voice shakes as he talks about how his father is trying to pit him and Nueng against each other again, something he despises. He can only awkwardly pat Chopper on the shoulder in silence.

He sees it again when Chopper confesses to him, and another time much later when they argue in a school bathroom. The first time, he'd tried to talk to Chopper calmly. It wasn't quite right, and Chopper started to avoid looking at him at all. The second time, he's blinded by his anger and confusion and the urge to do something right for once, and he's the one staying away from Chopper instead.

Something that feels like guilt stirs inside him. It's an uncomfortable sensation, one that Ben opts to push down and pretend doesn't exist.

It only truly registers how fragile Chopper can be when he's crying into his arms, having shot his father, with Nueng's screams ringing in his ears as he cradles a bleeding Palm in his arms. Ben surveys the scene but knows he can't do anything other than hold Chopper tight.

Chopper isn't a hero, and Ben isn't the Sun. They're both still children, a pair of lost teenagers miraculously finding each other in the rain. It's a truth they both have to accept before they can start to love each other in earnest.

6. Ben is at peace.

They're in London, Ben studying music and Chopper studying finance. Ben had long decided on this, but an argument with his father solidified his decision. That afternoon, when he grips Chopper's hand and leans into him, he feels more human than he has in years.

Many awkward conversations were had. Apologies, explanations and confessions poured out, more from Chopper than Ben. It isn't easy, but Chopper hopes that one day it will be.

Adjusting to London after growing up in Thailand is hard. Chopper and Ben take it one step at a time, and Ben is glad that Chopper decided to come with him. He doesn't want to be alone.

For the first time in years, Ben is truly happy. He can study what he enjoys while living with the boy he loves, and without his father around, a weight has been lifted. It's almost too much at first, going from being unable to exist as himself to having the freedom to just live. But with Chopper, he thinks he'll be fine.

[thegreenleavesofspring]

.

I have... a bad habit. A self-defense mechanism, but a bad one. Of, any time I encounter something out in the wild that I wanted and couldn't have (an event or an emotion), I deem it "stupid". Beautiful weddings are stupid. Birthday parties are stupid. Loving husbands are stupid... etc. And I don't say it to whoever I am talking to, I'm not quite that socially clueless, but I shore up my own disdain for it in the privacy of my mind.

And it's one I've had for most of my life although I've only recently quantified it. And I find myself doing it a lot and I'm trying to be mindful, now, of making myself stop and go "Do you actually think it's stupid or are you kicking against the pain of what you don't have" and nine times out of ten I'm preemptively trying to head off pain.

So anyway I'm trying to let it through in tiny little bits so it doesn't all come crashing down as an overwhelming wave and mourn it piece by piece at a time. And I'm also doing a lot of introspection. Because I never was taught how to regulate my emotions and that one person was right, I do tend to let them rule me, and I don't mean to, it's not an active conscious choice on my part, but that's not enough, I have to learn to master (not repress) them.

So now I'm trying to learn to master my emotions rather than letting them master me but that means constant monitoring and today I'm going down a checklist of "Why am I so tired and lethargic" and it's the depression setting in again for Round whatever and I always get really tired and sleepy and lethargic in the days leading up to that, yay. But along the way I realized that... the last time someone told me they loved me was Get Loved Nerd in my inbox and afaroffsong says it to me sometimes. And it helps. But sometimes I wish I had someone to say it to me in person, too, it helps to hear it audibly (and if it comes from someone who is telling the truth, not trying to be manipulative.)

I genuinely don't remember the last time I got a hug. Not dispensing one to make someone else feel better but just someone hugging me because they liked me as a person and wanted to hug me. I mean I hug my boys all the time and sometimes they even hug me back but those hugs are usually accompanied by headbutts or biting or kicking or fish-flopping or various other bruising activities and besides, they're little, they don't really have any concept yet of... consciously returning love? They need the hugs to flourish but it's not their place or their duty to return a hug.

I don't know. It just feels like, my whole life, any affection I got was conditional on how useful I am to someone and just for once I'd like to feel valued just... as me. I realize I'm not an easy person to love and almost an impossible person to like, once you strip me down to the bare bones, I know this, not only have I been told this but I've got enough self awareness to know that I'm all sharp edges and sharp angles and acerbic sarcasm and terrible but unintentional blunders. But surely I'm not all bad? Not all the way down? I just... surely it's not wrong to want to be valued as a person, not as your usefulness? Just... for someone to enjoy one's company?

Anyway I've been doing a lot of handing over bitterness and envy and sorrow to God lately and even... I don't know, what I thought were godly desires but maybe I'm feeling them too strongly? Putting them ahead of Him? I don't even know anymore. I feel like I'm blundering around in the dark trying to find His will and running up against rough rocks instead and I don't... I'm trying to do right, trying to do His will, but how can I possibly be? When everything I'm doing is wrong? I don't even know anymore.

I'm not sure... I don't know how to do this. And right now I can't hear Him. Which I don't think I have any egregious outstanding sins that would take me away from Him so I'm assuming I'm supposed to be walking by faith? Not by sight? But I'm not sure... I don't know. I don't know what to do.

I'm so very lonely.

...I should probably go brew myself a cup of raspberry tea, it sometimes helps lessen the severity of the depression. Hormones, yay.

[dragonandtiger]

Dreaming To Reality: Oneiromancy Chapter Thirty One - 12

Ryo stared at Zeed, his jaw slightly agape as his eyes widened.

Zeed didn’t know.

A thousand and one thoughts rushed through the Chosen of Miracles’ head at once. How could Zeed not know? What did this mean? What should he do? Should he tell him? Would it be bad to tell him? Did he even deserve to know? As it stood, Ryo wasn’t ready for the information himself. What would Zeed do if he knew that the position he was apparently envying, vying for even, was his all along?

Ryo was absolutely not ready to find out - not yet.

“I…,” Ryo fumbled, tripping over his words as he tried to put together something coherent besides the mishmesh of feelings colliding in his head. “You… I don’t… This is…”

Zeed chuckled before he leaned over to pat Ryo’s head. “There, there. I know the prospect must be quite overwhelming, I’m sure~! My brilliance tends to do that. Give yourself a moment, and I’m sure the obvious choice shall become clear, Beloved~!”

Ryo didn’t have a response for that, and wasn’t given an opportunity to think of one. All thoughts of conversation were cut off when Zeed suddenly hunched forward as he let out a strangled noise of pain. The Digimon trembled as he clenched his whole body, his arms wrapping around himself as he began to flicker erratically, like a signal that was being interrupted.

Zeed clamped his eyes shut as he clenched his jaw, suppressing any sound from escaping him. He dropped from the chair to his knees on the floor, right in front of Ryo’s bed. He remained that way for several moments as his body continued to flicker before it finally stopped, just as quickly as it had begun. The Digimon sucked in a deep breath of air through his nostrils before letting it out in a puff, as he didn’t dare ease the iron-clench of his jaw just yet. Only then did he open his eyes, which were unfocused and slightly glazed.

Ryo jerked upright as he stared in horror at Zeed, taken aback by what he had just witnessed. “A-are you okay?”

Zeed paused and glanced at Ryo, before grimacing. He was silent for a moment as he considered his response before offering a weak smile. “I-it’s nothing, Beloved… nothing for you to be concerned about. Just… a little something I picked up from our time in that dreadful ocean.”

Ryo tensed up at the mention of the Dark Ocean and a jolt of white hot panic shot through him. “What?! Did you get tainted by the Dark Ocean?”

[matthew621]

The Truth Is.

The truth is I still get lonely At times when laughter filled the room A painful echo resonating the words "They are happy when you're not around" The voices that torture knowing none can hear it but me

The truth is I still get envious When the softness of his voice envelops the surroundings only it was not meant to calm me but for another the lingering thoughts that maybe I do not deserve his serene voice

The truth is I still get angry A feeling that I tend to invite when things don't go my way Blood rushing through my head, immobilizing my rational thoughts The feeling of rage that covers the love I have nurtured for quite a while

The truth is I still get impatient The thought of how things seem to favor everybody but me Doubt creeping in as I continue to ask the question when? When will it be my turn?

The truth is I still get insecure For every woman who has embraced the flaws and scars they have Insecurity is creeping in like a beast tearing every piece of acceptance I have within me I ran as I chased the reflection of the person I wished and longed to be

The truth is I still feel jealous When I feel like I am enough, the world drops its bomb on me Whisper and echo of voices telling me "There is someone better than you." The question of how long it will take before the man I love gets stolen by another woman

The truth is I still sin A hypocrisy I tend to embrace every inch of my being questioning the real reason why he chose me That his blood was shed for a person like me who still sin

The truth is I don't know why Why had he saved me from eternal separation and why He had to be the sin that I cannot resist and I don't know why but he still chose to save me

The truth is I am not perfect For even if I was created in the image of God Sin has stained my very being from the beginning and I know it will be a form of pride if I say I was blameless because I am not.

Because I am not near to being righteous And if God's glory comes down to meet me right now I will vanish like I never existed For my very being does not deserve His presence

The truth is I am nothing without Him My life will lose its meaning the world would not make sense and I would have never felt the guilt for every action that does not equate to His kindness

The truth is I am still a work in progress A fire within me awakened that day that you hold me dear save me from the den and embrace me as I weep For I know I had run away home and you have waited for so long

The truth is no one can ever love me like you do The calmness in your voice stopped every storm in my head A love that does not get tired, You are sufficient You are the wind that rocks me as I slowly surrender life's baggage

The truth is I am a sinner clothed with his righteousness A savior crucified on the cross, spotless, blameless, guilty for the sins he didn't commit The lamb of God died and was resurrected He said in his words, "It is finished"

The truth is I would stumble and fall People will throw stones at me as they laugh, dare me to call on the God who changed me They will see me as a failure but He will remain He will remain spotless, pure and perfect He will remain as a shepherd, a carpenter, a perfect sacrifice

The truth is I will still feel this negative feeling Weep as I kneel and ask forgiveness for these things was not meant for me to keep Genuine forgiveness as he ran to pick me up Glued me piece by piece and call me His Friend

The truth is He is enough Enough to stop the madness in my heart, his hands reaching out to me saying "I am all that you need." His perfect timing, his perfect will, enough for darkness to flee in my thoughts Lights engulf my body as I now understand why I had to wait

Why I had to get lonely, for in my loneliness I sought the Lord and found love in His presence Why I had to be envious, for in my envy I had focused my eyes on his warmth, not on man, and followed a path that led to Him

Why I had to feel angry, for in my anger I appreciated what He had done in the cross For His wrath is greater than mine but salvation was his response Why I had to be impatient, for my impatience I understood the value of trust for my every step is built with trusting God

Why I had to feel insecure, for my uncertainty I had found the fullness of my being to the Lord His companionship took me to greater heights

Why I had to be jealous, for God is a jealous God He showed me the intensity of how we tend to disregard him and cling to other things I no longer detest his jealousy, I recognize that I am his possession.

Why I had to sin, for in my transgression I can come boldly to Him and humbly ask for his aid To change me, to mold me, to walk the path he intended me to be

The truth is I am unworthy The world has cursed me, I was born carrying an inheritance of sin But He died to overcome the world, The truth is He is the only way, the only truth, and the only life I can come to the Father because the truth is I have been saved by my Savior Jesus Christ.

[lunarticxenia]

Asteroid Leviathan #8813

Asteroid Leviathan #8813 deals with our inner demons and things that make life hard for us. One might apply more to you than another, also everything might not apply because this asteroid can present differently for many people. Hope you guys enjoy, and for anyone who’s sending questions I’m trying my best to answer them! My post on how to find asteroids in the natal chart is here. 

TW: Abuse, ED, S*xual assault. 

♠️ 1H/Aries: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 1H or in Aries regards their appearance, path in life, and general sense of self. Their inner demons could also regard their identity- perhaps they struggle with their sexuality or gender if they’re LGBT+. Individuals with this would likely pursue things like plastic surgery, heavy make-up, tattoos, piercings, and/or heavy working out to “fix” their appearance. They might also feel very lost with themselves as well, and don’t know who they truly are. They also might struggle with their path in life, they don’t know what they’re supposed to do and just feel lost all the time. 

♠️ 2H/Taurus: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 2H or in Taurus might regard possessions, their sense of worth, their body, and food. Individuals with this may have or had an eating disorder (myself included). These individuals might also have really low self esteem, and have a low sense of worth. They might find themselves in abusive relationships and/or friendships because their sense of worth is so low. They also might struggle with money; they might have grown up poor or grew up envying what other people had. They also might place their sense of worth based on how much money they have and/or what possessions they have.  They might feel that if they don’t have the nicest clothes that they’re just not worthy of anything. This could also manifest as a person who uses retail therapy and/or in more extreme cases someone who will do anything for money even it’s illegal or immoral. 

♠️ 3H/Gemini: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 3H or in Gemini might regard around intelligence, communication, siblings, primary and secondary education, and aunts & uncles. These individuals may have problems with communicating or learning- this could definitely manifest as an ADHD and/or a speech impediment placement. If not this extreme, the individual might just have problems with communicating in general and/or studying i.e. they can’t say how they feel, they can’t study, etc. They also might feel insecure about their intelligence and fear that they’re not smart enough.They could’ve gotten bullied in primary and/or secondary school. They could also have a strained relationship with a sibling and/or an aunt or uncle. In some cases, I’ve seen individuals with this have to take on almost a parental role with their siblings and this can cause a lot of strain on the individual. This could just mean an individual’s relationship with their sibling causes them strain. 

♠️ 4H/Cancer: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 4H or in Cancer might regard around the family, the mother, emotions, and their femininity. These individuals may have issues with their family- they might not get along with them well or they just flat out don’t like their family or certain members in it. Moreover, this could be a mommy issues placement. Individuals with this also might struggle with feeling insecure about showing their emotions and/or might struggle releasing them in a healthy way. They might be embarrassed when they cry, and no one will ever know how they feel. They tend to suffer alone. They might also struggle with their feminine side. Individuals might view their feminine side as “weak” and might associate it with showing emotions which they don’t like to do. 

♠️ 5H/Leo: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 5H or in Leo might regard love, creativity, expression, and children. These individuals may have issues with love. Not really relationships necessarily, but just how they give and receive love. These individuals might also struggle with seeing what love is and may struggle with recognizing it. They might see validation or attention as love. They also might be afraid of falling in love. They also might stay in abusive relationships because they love that person so much or they think that the abuse is a form of love. Basically just issues with love and how they see it. If not that their inner demons could center around creativity; perhaps they get absorbed in their creative works and nothing they do is ever good enough. They also might have a fear of having children and/or they might have issues with their children if they have them. For a person in the LGBT+ community I could also see this placement manifesting as being afraid to express their sexuality and gender (since this deals with love). If not that, they just struggle with expressing themselves in general. 

♠️ 6H/Virgo: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 6H or in Virgo might regard their health, employment, and sense of usefulness. These individuals might struggle with their health. While it might just be normal health problems, I’ve seen it more manifested as a person’s mental state making them have health problems, i.e. a person with anxiety gets IBS. Whatever the mental disorder or issue is, it can cause issues to the individuals physical health. This could also manifest as a mental disorder as well since it deals with inner demons. I could also see this as a person who constantly has to help people and overexert themselves because they feel like they’re never doing enough. I could also see this as a person feeling insecure at work, perhaps they feel like they’re a bad worker, and that they’re not good enough to be there.

♠️ 7H/Libra: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 7H or in Libra might regard relationships, partnerships/marriage, and enemies. These individuals may have issues with their relationships, and it doesn’t have to be just romantic relationships. They could struggle with how they maintain relationships with others; there could be a lot of arguments and/or they might struggle to upkeep the relationship. They also might have a hard time being vulnerable to others which can hinder a relationship development. These individuals can also struggle with romantic partnerships- they might find themselves dealing with toxic and/or abusive partners. Relationships in general for them can just bring them a lot of pain and trauma. The individual could also struggle with enemies as part of their inner demons as it can bring them strain. This can also be a person who’s their own worst enemy. 

♠️ 8H/Scorpio: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 8H or in Scorpio might regard sex, intimacy and vulnerability. These individuals may have issues regarding sex. In extreme cases this can manifest as sexual harassment, abuse, or assault. In less extreme cases they might have a hard time with sex because they have a hard time being that vulnerable to another person. Or this can manifest as someone who has sex a lot because they seek intimacy. These individuals regardless tend to struggle with intimacy and allowing themselves to be vulnerable to others. They tend to be more closed off around others and it takes a long time for them to open up. They enjoy their privacy and being “the lone wolf” however this can make them quite lonely because they feel that no one truly knows them. 

♠️ 9H/Sagittarius: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 9H or in Sagittarius might regard traveling, higher education, religion, and philosophy. These individuals may have issues in regards to traveling- perhaps they desire to travel but are confined by their circumstances. They also might have had something bad happened if they have traveled. They also might’ve had some trauma happen in college and/or is a big source of their mental anguish. I could also see this manifesting as religious trauma, especially in LGBT+ individuals. In more extreme cases this could indicate abuse by someone in the clergy. These individuals might struggle with being the victim of their own philosophy of life. Maybe their philosophy of life is just naturally pessimistic and this can cause them a great deal of pain. 

♠️ 10H/Capricorn: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 10H or in Capricorn might regard one’s career, reputation/public image, the father, and masculinity. These individuals tend to struggle with their career. They might feel that they’re not good enough for their career and might have a lot of anguish in deciding a career. Their career might also bring them a lot of anguish perhaps they work as a cop or a social worker and they come across a lot of really traumatizing scenarios. They also might struggle with their reputation/public image-perhaps people spread rumors about them a lot or people see them in a negative light, and this can cause them a lot of sadness. This can also be a daddy issues placement. This can also manifest as someone struggling with their masculinity or masculine side. If it’s a guy or a masculine presenting person he/they might not feel they’re being masculine enough. 

♠️ 11H/Aquarius: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 11H or in Aquarius might regard friendships, their sense of belonging, and their hopes & dreams. Individuals with this might struggle with friendships. Their friendships can bring them a lot of anguish- perhaps they tend to befriend toxic people or they just tend to have a hard time making friends at all. They also might have a lot of trauma regarding friends- perhaps something traumatic happened when they were with friends or their friends caused their trauma. In extreme circumstances this can manifest as a friend causing the person abuse. This person also might not feel like they belong anywhere. No matter what they do they feel like an outcast. They also might have big hopes and dreams and they feel like they can’t accomplish them. They might also have unrealistic hopes and dreams and this can crash and burn. 

♠️ 12H/Pisces: The inner demons of individuals with Leviathan in the 12H or in Pisces might regard spirituality, death, and one’s hidden self. Individuals with this may have a fear of death. They also might’ve been traumatized by the death of someone important to them, and they haven’t been the same. They also might have hidden parts of themselves that they resent and don’t like to show to people. These parts of themselves can cause them strain. They also might struggle with spirituality as well, they might not feel that they’re spiritual enough or they might feel lost spiritually. They might not have anything to really believe in, and they just feel lost. 

[astaroth1357]

Hi there, congrats for the 1500 subs. How about the bros reaction to an MC who's an empath?

Brothers with an MC Who is an Empath

This should not have been as hard as it was but maaan, my brain just wasn’t working. Finally got it done though!

Intro:

An Empath is essentially someone who is highly sensitive to outside stimuli like sounds, personalities, energies, emotions, or just hectic/chaotic environments. They tend to absorb the emotions of others into themselves because of this. Though their sensitivity can grant deeper understanding for others, it comes at the price of the Empath’s own emotional and physical health if not given enough time to decompress which can lead to feeling drained, irritable, depressed, or overwhelmed.

Lucifer

Oh boy, if there was ever any demon not in tune to his own emotions…

He started out legitimately not knowing what an "empath" was and frankly he didn't care to know. His main concern was just keeping the MC alive.

Though that didn't seem to be too hard because they apparently get tired quickly… or at least they had to take extended periods away from most of his brothers.

He wasn't sure why, he first assumed it was because they found his brothers annoying but that didn't seem to be the case either...

He'd see them grinning with Mammon after a jackpot, relaxing with Satan in silence, and even crying with Levi over things so niche and pointless he couldn’t imagine that they actually cared...

It wasn’t too long until they set their sights on him. 

They always seemed to know when he was stressed or when he needed to talk to someone. He'd even be embarrassed to admit there were days when he’d just hover somewhat close to them, face more or less slathered with "I really need to talk right now" but too proud to make the first move.

After some time, he decided to look up what an empath was again and it all clicked into place. They probably knew when he was tired because they could just sense it off of him.

And who knows how exhausting that must be for them...

After that little revelation he actually started paying more attention to his own health to keep it from spilling over to them, but he would still go to them to talk from time to time. He honestly never expected a human to become his closest confidant.

Mammon

Mammon has BIG energy. He’s one of those personalities that just brightens a room he walks in but damn… if he’s not a little exhausting to be around sometimes…

Truthfully, he was kind of into their whole “I know how you feel so you don’t have to say it” vibe though it was really confusing to start with...

On the one hand, they never made fun of him for his sensitive side. Not once. And they seemed pick up on the days where he wasn't feeling his best as well, which only made him happy and want spend more time with them.

But on the other hand, he'd be lying if he said that their need to recharge away from him didn't catch him off guard a lot... Hell, for the first few weeks of getting to know the MC he thought they didn't like him at all!

It took the MC sitting him down and explaining to him that they're more sensitive to things like lights, sounds, and emotions for him to kind of get the picture. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, they just needed to be somewhere calm.

Cue a lot of “Okay human, I’ll be calm. Promise! Ya won’t even now I’m here!” in a well meaning, but pretty loud voice and not getting much better from there, bless his heart...

Even after he eventually gets the picture and stops hanging off of their leg, it does bum him out to be separated for however long it takes for them to get better (at worst, it can be days).

But he really gets excited like a puppy whenever they finally come back again! Big grins and lots of hugs (good luck peeling him off now).

Levi

Levi is... best taken in short bursts.

Though his personality isn’t big like Mammon’s, he does have a lot of lingering negativity around him. Not exactly his fault, being Envy and all, but not great for someone who’s sensitive to emotions.

In truth, Levi genuinely loves being around the MC because they “get” him even if they don’t get what’s happening.

While his brothers may roll their eyes or struggle to understand how he can put so much emotional investment into an anime or a character, the MC would always seem to feel and respect that his emotions were genuine and let him experience them without question.

… But at the same time, that sensitivity meant that they got carried in with him through his every emotion, good, bad, or somewhat erratic depending on the situation… 

Add to that his higher than usual need for validation, investment, and feedback due to his insecurity and unfortunately he’s easily the most emotionally draining person in the House...

It took some time to explain to Levi what an empath was and that their desired space wasn’t because there was something wrong with him or anything, they just needed breaks. Thankfully, being an introvert himself meant that Levi understood this a lot quicker than Mammon.

In truth, being with Levi could be fun and rewarding for both parties. During his high points, his happiness truly does shine like no other, just… don’t overdo it.

Satan

In the beginning, Satan was honestly pretty impressed how quickly the exchange student saw through his fake smiles. They’d know that there was no actual joy behind them and thus avoided him for the most part.

This was before they formed their pact so he was perfectly fine with that. Let them hide, that’s the smart idea.

But after getting to know them and going through the body-switch, he started to see that it was deeper than just some good intuition on their part. Something about them… reflected the people around them...

They appeared to be acutely aware of the emotion in a given person or a given room and reacted like they were soaking in the atmosphere they found themselves in. Taking it into themselves…

It truly confused him.

Satan is the picture of emotional control, it’s been taught to him again and again to always keep a good handle on himself because things go flying when he doesn’t. The idea of being so open to others just didn’t make much sense to him… 

Why would anyone want to live so dependent on the emotions of others? It sounded chaotic just to hear about it...

But after he opened up to them about his own inner doubts he started to think it wasn’t such a bad thing. They appeared to be equipped to help him navigate his own emotions, especially the new ones he didn’t have the best grasp on yet.

He later did his own research into human emotions, discovered empaths, and that put it all into perspective. Like Lucifer, he did his best not to overwhelm them after that but there was little worry about that anyway. Satan is, again, emotional control at its finest.

Asmodeus

Oh, Asmo picked up on their human’s little quirk relatively quickly compared to his brothers. Being emotionally observant is just part of what makes him so good at what he does.

Honestly, he enjoyed just watching them from afar… Watching the way their eyes lit up when talking to a cheerful Simeon or how huffy and frustrated they’d get along with Mammon when things weren’t going his way. It was cute to him, like a child playing “Pretend.”

Eventually, though, he started to notice that it went a lot deeper than mere imitation...

One day, Levi came home distraught about the tragic death of some voice actor he fancied and the MC was right along with him, crying as if that loss was theirs...

On another, Satan had spent the whole day silently fuming and the MC was a complete wreck, tense and on-edge for no other reason than the feeling of aggression in the air…

And crowds… crowded rooms seemed to be the death of them. So much noise and constant input, they’d have to leave so quickly…

Asmo saw all these things himself, without having to be told, and he became a refuge for them when things became too much. He has a big personality himself, but he could tone it down for a time and offer them a place away for a while.

If school, parties, or the brothers themselves just became too much, the MC could always go to Asmo’s room to vent like they let everybody else to with them. He’d keep the place quiet and calm and just help them sort things out...

Thank their father for Asmo’s observance.

Beelzebub

Legit the calmest, sweetest, nicest person to be around. Truly the best companion for an empathic MC to have.

Beel’s personality is positive, sweet, and (most importantly) stable. He’s not too bombastic nor too withdrawn, he’s not riddled with hidden stress or self-loathing, and he’s not even manipulative in any way, he’s just… Beel.

Am I saying that Beel is the MC’s emotional support demon? Yes. Yes I am.

Being around Beel is like hooking them up to a walking battery recharging station. Something about him just exudes warmth and comfort… They could be wrapped up in his arms for days and never say a word yet still be perfectly content...

Beel doesn't really mind them coming to him when distressed either because he likes being able to help them when they’re feeling drained. It makes him feel kind of special, they don’t seem to go to anyone else in quite the same way.

Usually, one of his brothers will be in a bad mood and the human will flock to Beel like a protective barrier. They'll hug him or trail along behind him like a lost puppy, which he thinks is very cute.

If they’re feeling really out of it, he’d carry them around on his back while they rest like he does for Belphie sometimes. Any time his brothers try to get too close to them or look like they’re going to bother them, he’ll just carry them away to some place quieter.

Though, the MC did pick up the deep sadness he felt for Lilith and Belphie (while he was gone) from time to time.... Which, considering how kind and comforting he usually is, just makes that dip in mood all the more painful and distressing for them. Poor baby… 

Belphegor

Belphie is another calm personality to have around, kind of similar to Beel, but since he's more prone to sadness and irritability he doesn't make the best companion…

If Beel is comfort, then Belphie is repose. Relaxed and peaceful, but also languid and sluggish… When Beel isn't around, then he makes a decent second, but only on good days.

Belphie has a mixed opinion on their uncanny ability to pick up on his feelings… He tries his best to be “mysterious” so having someone who can read him like a book gets under his skin just a little…

But he also really likes how much it helps them get to know him and understand where he’s coming from (being the youngest, he isn’t as used to being heard by anybody other than Beel). So, he’s very conflicted…

It didn’t help at all when it came to light that the MC could legitimately tell that he felt very hostile and angry towards them while he was still in the attic. When he asked why they helped him anyway, they told him so that they could make Beel happy again, regardless of how he felt about them which... ouch...

As if he could feel any worse about that particular incident… They could feel how guilty he was about that… right?

Even if they can’t he makes sure that they know that he’s sorry and he won’t do it again. Probably the lil’shit.

[godoflobsters]

The Brothers and Dateables With a Tattoo Artist MC

My own MC was a tattoo artist before she came to the Devildom, so I thought I’d write up some head cannons with a tattoo artist MC.

MC is gender neutral!

Mammon

Nobody can convince me that the “Brothers Under a Pact” squad wouldn't be the first ones to get tattoos from MC, and Mammon would definitely be the first

Definitely likes to brag about it too

Don't remind him that there are countless people in the human realm that you tattooed before him or he will pout

People tend to think that Mammon is cheap and would try to talk you into giving him free or cheap tattoos, but he couldn't stand to be like that towards you especially regarding something that you’re so good at

Our first man works his butt off every time he wants to get some new ink from you

Likes to give you a big ole tip every time

Gets fidgety when he has to sit still for too long so you two have to take breaks often

Prefers small/medium sized tattoos rather than really big ones

One time after he started getting tattoos from you, he was at a modeling gig and they tried to make him cover them up with makeup, he quit and that magazine went bankrupt not too long after...dont fuck with the avatar of greed

Once your shop starts taking off in the Devildom, he and Asmo try to convince you to do a shoot for Majolish(They definitely didn't pull some strings to get Majolish to do a whole segment about you and your business)

Beelzebub

The second brother to get a tattoo from MC

Refuses to get any food related tattoos: he doesn't want to accidentally take a chunk out of himself when he gets blinded by his hunger

This man has a very high pain tolerance and sits like a rock while you're tattooing him and you love him for it

He definitely needs snack breaks during longer sessions though

Has a memorial tattoo for Lillith over his heart that matches with one on Belphie

While making this list I was randomly blessed with the mental image of Beel with abuncha old school American traditional tattoos and you can pry that headcannon from my cold, dead hands

Mammon likes to brag that he has the most tattoos from you, but Beel might give him a run for his money, he doesn't mind Mammon’s bragging most of the time though, so he just lets him believe whatever he wants this time

Simeon

But Simeon has never been all that great at following the rules that they set for him

The first of the dateables to get a tattoo

He wasn't actually planning on getting a tattoo at first, but one day he overheard Luke trying to scold you for all of your tattoos(definitely before the incident with Beel and Lucifer in the underground tomb) and that was the only push he needed to jump on the “tattoos from MC” train

There is a lot of rhetoric in the Celestial Realm about how “Your body is a temple and you should not mark it”

He’s still not willing to stray too far from his roots though, so he’d probably get something with vaguely religious undertones

Absolutely delights in the shocked look on your face and the sheepish questions on whether angels are allowed to do this

Once he’s finally convinced you that you're not damning him to fall by tattooing him, the process goes by very easily

He is very easygoing and open regarding designs and he handles the pain very well

He absolutely loves to show his tattoo off, even when he goes home to the Celestial Realm and receives his reprimands from Michael

Leviathan

The third brother to get a tattoo from MC

Didn't want to get a tattoo at first, all of that physical contact and pain on top of it? No way

But then Mammon, Beel, and even Simeon all got one and he got jealous

You're HIS Henry, why are THEY the ones who get to wear your art? He might’ve been able to deal with his dumb brothers, but SIMEON TOO?

You gotta sit down with him and have a nice long chat about it, making sure this is something that he would actually want to do and not just his envy talking

Spoiler alert: It was definitely just his envy talking

He realises that he is actually oddly attached to the idea of getting a tattoo from you now though, so he comes up with designs and draws them on himself until he is certain that he won't regret it

Would get something tiny and probably gaming related

Definitely very squeamish about the pain aspect but the design that the two of you came up with is very simple and small, so he is able to make it through without fainting

He absolutely loves his new tattoo...but he is never doing that again

Belphegor

Fourth brother to get a tattoo

Has wanted to get one ever since Beel showed him the tattoo he got in memory of Lillith, but things were very...not good...between the two of you at that point

Finally worked up the courage to at least ask if you would be okay with it after the two of you made a pact

Beel, forgetting his super high pain tolerance, told him that it getting a tattoo doesn't hurt at all, so he was in for a big surprise when he went under the needle for the first time

Whiny at first, but he manages to stay very still for you

Has a memorial tattoo for Lilith over his heart that matches with one on Beel

Will definitely start to doze off during long sessions

Convinced Satan to get a matching Anti Lucifer League tattoo with him(definitely doesn't try to convince you to get one too)

Make sure that he does not, under any circumstances, actually fall asleep while you're tattooing him. He did once and he rolled over in his sleep, almost ruining an entire tattoo

Ever since that time, Beel has come with him to his sessions so you could focus on your work and he can focus on keeping Belphie awake

Satan

Gets his tattoo not long after Belphie

One of those people that think every tattoo needs to mean something so he takes forever trying to pick out something that he wants

Would probably get some sort of quote or design inspired by his favorite book, something that really resonated with who he is as a person

Was somehow convinced by Belphie to get an Anti Lucifer League tattoo

Does he regret it whenever he realizes that he now has a portion of his skin dedicated to Lucifer of all people? Possibly, but he definitely won't say anything about it to you

Loves to look at you and just admire your tattoos, asking the stories behind each and every one of them that he can see

He might be a bigger fan of literature than the fine arts, but that doesn't mean that he has any less of an appreciation for your work

Definitely pulls some strings and gets one of his friends who owns an art gallery to display some of your work there

Can set you up with all the connections that you need to make your mark on the Devildom art world

Lucifer

The last of the brothers to get a tattoo

In the beginning he has no intentions of getting a tattoo, he does have alot of respect for your talents and how hard you work for them though

As an art lover and artist himself, he will most certainly commission you from time to time and hang your work in his study

He won't admit it, but seeing your art and thinking of you when he's stressed with work is very soothing

He eventually decides to let you tattoo him only if it’s in a place that is easily covered by his clothes, considering how he dresses that leaves you with pretty much his entire body to work with

Sometimes when he has some time off he will grab a sketchbook and join you if he finds you in the common room working on a design, you share a comfortable silence, with the only sounds be the crackling of the fireplace and the scratching of pencils on paper

The kind of person that wants a tattoo but has no idea what he actually wants, but hes picky as fuck so he will turn down every single idea that you give him for weeks

He is lucky that you love him

Whenever you two talk about placements, if you mention anything on his back to cover up the scars from his wings he will almost back out entirely

Almost

Afew months later he’ll put his pride aside come back, admitting that your ideas would be perfect and that he wants to go through with it

During the session he has way too much pride to admit that he was feeling any pain

That is until you have to start going over the scars

As soon as the needles hit scar tissue he starts to fall apart; tears, shaking, the whole nine yards

It takes you quite a few sessions to finish since he cant handle such long sessions on that portion of his back

The summer after his new back piece is finished, he goes with you and his brothers back to Diavolo’s beach, this time he takes his shirt off in front of everyone for the first time since the fall

He wears your art with such pride that he lets everyone keep the memory, he even lets Asmo keep the pictures he took of all of them up on Devilgram

Diavolo

Wanted to be the first to get a tattoo but Barbatos said no

If you want to continue your career in the Devildom for the duration of your stay, he will buy you a building to work from and any supplies to get started since you had to leave your stuff in the human realm

Diavolo has rooms in the castle filled with the art that he's collected over the years, so when he sees that you're an artist he gets so excited

Before he finally gets tattooed by you, he buys a lot of your artwork and hangs it up around the castle

It takes a few years to propose the idea again to Barbatos in a way that wont make the butler’s hair fall out from stress, but he finally relented under one condition: it has to be in an area that is still hidden while he’s in his demon form

He decides that his legs would be the perfect place to indulge in your artistic talents while also keeping Barbatos’s controlling side at bay

Hes another one that knows he wants a tattoo but no clue what he wants to get

Unlike Lucifer though, he is a true open canvas

He truly adores your art so he wholeheartedly trusts you with his body and knows that he will love anything that you do for him

He knows that this is most likely very nerve wracking for you considering his position so he tries to reassure you and make the process very easy for you

You still put everything into designing him something fit for a king

He’s the type to prefer large pieces that span over entire sections of his body rather than abuncha small/medium sized ones

Another fidgetter, he’s really not all that accustomed to pain so he doesn't have a high tolerance for it

Likes to treat you to dinner at Ristorante Six after each of his sessions

Tips like the absolute king he is, you could probably pay a couple months of rent back at your apartment in the Human Realm just from his tip

Once his tattoo is finally finished and healed, he will find every excuse that he can think of to invite you and the brothers on outings to places where he is free from scrutiny to wear shorts and show off your artwork

Barbatos

The last of all of the boys to get a tattoo

It was a complete shock to everyone when he came to you and asked if he could make an appointment to get tattooed by you

“Everyone” being you, Diavolo, and Lucifer because nobody else knows that it happened and he would like to keep it that way

Another member of the “I’ll get one as long as it’s somewhere nobody will see” club...so basically not his face

Before the two of you get to talking about designs, you expect him to go with something small and simple, maybe an elegant little teapot or something along those lines

Then this man comes to his consultation and throws you for a loop talking about a sleeve

Very picky, he has high standards for himself and what's on his body

Knows exactly what he wants but does his best not to stifle your creativity during the design process

You learn ALOT about just who lurks behind Barbatos’s mild-mannered butler facade during his sessions, he’s surprisingly upfront and honest whenever you have him under the needle

Solomon

Can't get a tattoo

This man has pact marks for 72 demons all over his body, there is simply no more room

Any open space he has is being saved just in case any other demons *cough* Lucifer *cough* ever decide to come around to making a pact

Collects your flash and hangs it up around his room

If you take Diavolo up on his offer to set up a shop in the Devildom, he will make sure to tell all of his pact-mates about you, hype up your work, and get you a lot of business in the door

Sometimes he will commission art from you and use magic to make your art temporarily appear on his skin over the pact marks

Once you become a sorcerer and have a better grasp on your magic, he helps you experiment in creating magical inks and enchanting tattoos

Asmodeus

The only one that actually doesn't want to get a tattoo

He doesnt think that tattoos would fit in very well to the image that he has for himself

And not being able to show off every inch of his beautiful skin while its healing is a no from him

Since he likes to test out his new makeup and skincare products on you, sometimes after he has had his way with your face he will let you draw on him with skin safe markers

would definitely be a wimp about the pain

Will spam pictures to his Devilgram of his fancy new temporary tattoos and you drawing on him

Will definitely try to bring you some of his flings to get his name tattooed on them, you will have to reprimand him every single time and eventually he will stop

If you're not the type to keep up with social media, he’ll offer to keep up a Devilgram account for your shop

If you're ever attempting to draw and you have a very specific pose in your head that you can't find a reference for, he will not hesitate to get up and start posing for you

Luke

He is baby and cant have any tattoos until he's older

His mind frequently bounces back and forth between the whole “your body is a temple” rhetoric that he was taught growing up and “wow that's so cool!”

After Simeon got his tattoo Luke became a lot more enthusiastic and curious about your job though

Will occasionally ask if he can have one of your flash sheets so he can color your pictures

These very often end up on the fridge in Purgatory Hall

Sometimes they even make their way to the fridge in the House of Lamentation too

Will this make the brothers jealous? Yes. Do you care? No.

Luke loves you and looks up to you so much that he goes through a little phase of wanting to copy you, yourself and the entirety of Purgatory Hall can expect loads of temporary marker tattoos

[honeyabyss]

A humans mortality (Lucifer x Mc)

Summary: Mc suddenly realizes their own mortality and it scares them, but Lucifer is there to comfort and reassure. (This was a request by @number-0-iz, hope you like it!)

Warnings: some random demons threatens you, implied anxiety attack

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a while since the day you arrived in Devildom. By now it felt almost like a second home, demons weren't that different from humans at most times.

Sure they still were supernatural beings who are more than capable of snapping you in half without any effort at all, but you always brushed all these small differences away.

Don't think about them! It had been your very first rule to be established for yourself at the start of the exchange year, to help and get more comfortable around these non-human beings. At one point the bad feelings slipped into the back of your mind, only once in a while emerging from it's deep sleep, for example when one of the brothers snapped yet again. But it didn't scare you anymore! You made friends among the demons, something you would have never thought for possible just one year ago, but here you are!

That doesn't mean though that all demons have accepted you...You were after all still a lowly human, just living under the protection of the demon lords. Some of those of lower ranking found it unbelievable. What did you do to make those mighty demons like you?

Some demons gossiped loudly in RADs hallways even when you passed them, some chose to envy you from the shadows, while others, more bolder maybe also less intelligent ones, tried to threaten you, to make you stay away from the beloved yet equally feared brothers. But as they never truly tried anything, due to one of your protectors being around you all the time, you ignored the comments.

It was late in the afternoon and Mammon had ditched you, it wasn't really planned, but someone he was indebted to had recognized him and started chasing him. You had tried to keep up with them, but they were too fast.

Not wanting Mammon to get into trouble for leaving you behind, you made your way back to the House of Lamentation.

The streets were bustling with demons of all kinds, shopping, going home, meeting and talking with others; it felt just like a normal day in a human realm city.

Though most of them were friendly to you, you didn't want to test your luck and briskly walked through the crowded streets, trying to avoid bumping into anyone.

Unfortunately that was deemed to be impossible and so you accidentally walked into a tall demon you didn't recognize, but instantly had a queasy feeling upon seeing his face.

The demon scowled at you, brushing some invisible dirt off the places you touched him.

A meekly muttered apology came from your mouth. You hadn't meant to cause trouble and definitely not to one that looked so dangerous.

The demon didn't respond at first he just stared at you. As you tried to sidestep around the demon, he moved with you, blocking your way forward.

"Where do you think you're going? Trying to escape? You didn't actually think I'd let you run off, right?"

You didn't answer, didn't even know what would be the best to respond now. All you could think of was that he hopefully wouldn't notice how your heart raced in fear.

"All alone today? None of the brothers are accompanying you? Have they finally realised how worthless you are? Maybe I should do them a favour and get rid of you for the sake of all of us?"

Your eyes were wide open, adrenaline pumping through your veins and your instinct told you to run, to run now, to run fast and to run far in hopes of escape, but your mind told you otherwise, you were no match to a fully grown demon, not even to a small one, running wouldn't help you.

You had always known that demons were demons, that there were distinct differences between your races, yet you pushed them away, for the sake of the exchange year you braved your way through the daily stress in hell, forgetting a small but important fact: you were very much still just a mortal.

Your own heartbeat resonated in your ears, blocking every other sound out, your hands felt clammy with the cold sweat of fear and your eyes didn't seem to be able to focus on anything. You were in absolute shock, desperately trying to find a way out of the situation.

The demon wraps his hand tightly around your wrist, but before he can start pulling you away another hand interferes, freeing you from your captor's bruising grip.

Lucifer is standing between you and the demon looking furious, he is yelling at the startled lower ranking demon in front of him, but you can't make out what he is saying as you're still in your stupor.

Your mind is still racing over time when Lucifer is starting to gently guide you back home. No words are said, and if he did, you didn't notice too caught up in your thoughts.

"I could have died...", you whisper after what feels like an hour later.

"But you're not. You're safe now. I won't let anything like that ever happen again to you.", Lucifer answers having heard your whispering. His hand is still holding yours so gently as if it were going to shatter at any moment.

Your head turns slowly towards him, only now you realize that you were sitting on the sofa in his room, when you had made it here you couldn't really remember. Everything seemed to be a blur.

With the knowledge of finally being at a safe place, your body decides to break down. Tears start to stream down your face and your whole body shakes with every sob. Lucifer's arms wrap around you, holding you firmly, yet not painful, against his chest, one of his hands continuously stroking over your head to comfort you.

Your hands grip the material of his shirt so tight that your knuckles turn white as you sob in the comfort of his arms.

"I-I could have died...I don't want to! I'm scared!", the more you think about it the more scared you get, and speaking it out loud doesn't help calm you down either. Your breathing is getting short and erratic, transporting only enough air into your lungs to stay conscious. The cold feeling of fear keeps spreading throughout your body, trying to consume you completely, only stopping at Lucifer's words.

"Don't be scared...I'm here with you. Let's calm down first before you hyperventilate...", his voice is low and soothing, slowly helping you to normalize your breathing yet a few sobs are still coming through every now and then.

"I'm not going to pretend I know how terrifying the thought of dying is...demons usually don't have to worry about that after all, but I experienced how much it hurts to lose a person, so I might know at least a bit more than others....Death...is inevitable for human beings. You may have a short life, but I believe you also get to spend the most beautiful ones."

You silently listen to him still wrapped up in his warm hug while you hide your tearstained face in his chest.

"The life of a demon can become quite lonely and boring sometimes, after all, living for multiple millennials is a long time, maybe even too long...A thing I enjoy today, might become the most boring thing in the next centuries. Trying to find new stuff to enjoy can be hard and you become unmotivated and sometimes demons even become numb to all joy...If it weren't for my troublesome brothers...it might have already happened to me as well", he lets out a small chuckle before continuing, "anyway, what I mean to tell you is that though your life is short, humans live their life to the fullest, getting to enjoy many different things, never having to worry about something becoming less entertaining in the next century. While humans live in the now, demons tend to forget this and either dwell in memories of the past or the worries of the future. A flower's beauty comes from their inevitability of wilting, because the short time of their lives when they blossom is also the part where they are loved the most! Maybe that is why humans have to die, their colours are too vibrant and beautiful to exist forever."

While attempting at comforting you, he was probably the most open and vulnerable he had ever been, but he didn't seem to mind, as long as it helped you he was happy.

"But your life isn't over yet, not even close to the end...I promise to protect you until your very last breath. And when the time comes to say goodbye to this world I'll be with you holding your hand, making sure you're okay. And afterwards, even when centuries have gone by, I will never forget you, you will live on in my memories forever. I promise you!"

[mbti-notes]

Hi mbti-notes, hope you are doing well. I am an INFP who is easily taken by persuasive people with questionable opinions. I was a part of an online forum about women prioritizing their wellbeing in relationships that quickly devolved into something ugly. I want to do better next time. When people speak with a lot of conviction, I am easily persuaded because I see the confidence that I lack. I will be utilizing the resources you have already linked on critical thinking. I need to be less gullible

I understand your sentiment because this issue is quite close to my heart. I always try to place truth as my highest ideal, so it pains me greatly to see myself or others be misled by false information. Part of my motivation for running this blog is to try to warn people against quick-fix ideas that end up doing them more harm than good. Critical thinking skills are more important than ever because we unfortunately now live in a social media world that allows misinformation and disinformation to spread like wildfire. There are too many opportunities for people to find information that engages them at the expense of information that is true.

Generally speaking, Fs tend to be trusting, especially when it comes to people they like or relate to. They need this trait because it is essential for relationships to thrive and love to blossom. Having healthy and happy relationships is one of the major factors that determines whether you will live a good quality of life.

However, every personality trait has its upsides and downsides. The downside of being trusting is that you might end up putting faith in people who don't deserve it. You can think of critical thinking as a form of self-defense training. It helps you spot threats and neutralize them quickly, before too much damage is done. This doesn't mean that you'll never get deceived or hurt. If someone is determined to take advantage of you, they will use all sorts of devious tactics. The most important thing is that you're able to detect them and protect yourself as soon as possible.

Do you understand why people often fall prey to false information? I would argue that the main reason is low self-awareness: they don't know themselves very well and aren't aware of what really motivates them. Most people are at low levels of ego development, which means that they are, by and large, unaware of being driven by underlying emotional issues.

You brought up a great example. One of your main underlying issues is that you lack confidence. Thus, your approach to people is often framed by this issue. You (unconsciously) seek out people who are able to lend you their confidence. You're definitely not alone there. Numerous studies have revealed how easily people are taken in by empty confidence and charisma in leaders. This is why psychopaths and narcissists achieve leadership positions more easily than the average person. The average person is usually more honest, in that the degree of confidence they exude matches their actual level of knowledge and capability. As an average person, you then assume that others are similarly honest. If they exude high confidence, they must know better than you... right? Oftentimes, the more confident someone appears to be, the more likely it is that they're trying to persuade you for ulterior motives rather than educate you for altruistic motives.

There are several aspects to tackling this problem of low self-awareness. Improve your emotional intelligence to make it more difficult for people to emotionally manipulate you. Improve your critical reasoning ability so that you know how to evaluate information on your own. Properly vet your sources of information.

1) Emotional Intelligence: What are your emotional vulnerabilities? We all have them but we are not all aware of them. For example: What sorts of things about people trigger your awe, envy, jealousy, admiration, resentment, self-loathing, etc? It's a lot harder for people to exploit your emotional vulnerabilities when you're fully aware of them and know to tread more carefully whenever they get triggered.

The consumer economy and the social media world run on emotional manipulation. What does that mean? There wouldn't be so many "influencers" out there if not for the masses of people wanting to feel something. There's pleasure in the engagement, the inspiration, the novelty, the shock, the outrage, the possession, the tribal validation, isn't there? If you're looking to get hooked by something, someone will use that opportunity to hook you for their own ends.

If someone is hitting hard on your emotional vulnerabilities (i.e. it seems as though they know exactly what to say to trigger a response in you), have a strategy for maintaining some emotional distance for awhile, in order to give yourself enough time to properly evaluate the person and what they are saying. It could be as simple as shutting off your device or walking away to clear your head.

For example, let's say you go to the store and the salesperson is using high pressure sales tactics on you. Politely tell them that they're making great points and you appreciate their help, but you need some time to mull it over. Leave the store, whip out your phone, and start doing research. You might soon discover that there's another store selling the same product for a lower price or that the product has gotten very poor reviews. Always give yourself the time and opportunity to seek out the truth.

I have a friend who loves to solicit my opinion on random things. However, I noticed that they'll never show any signs of agreement or disagreement when listening to my arguments. The conversation always ends with them saying that they need some time to think on it. They obviously place a lot of trust in me because they often seek out my input, but they don't automatically trust that everything I say is true or the full story, no matter how confident I appear to be. This brings me to the next point.

2) Critical Reasoning: One of the most important aspects of critical reasoning is making the effort to be as objective as you can, which is something FPs often struggle with. Objectivity means that you try to understand the whole picture, from every vantage point available to you. Objectivity means that you evaluate information impartially, from a position of someone who is disinterested (i.e. someone with no stakes in the matter either way). The reason objectivity is difficult is that when you get interested in something, you become emotionally invested in it, maybe you get your hopes up, and that can cloud your judgment.

One easy way to be more objective is to focus less on the person and focus purely on the content of their words. Whether you like, admire, or hate someone is irrelevant to the factuality of their statements. Evaluate the claims and statements for factuality in isolation, apart from who happened to utter them. Several of the books that I recommended on the resources page under critical thinking teach people how to evaluate information carefully, step by step.

When we like someone, we tend to assume that they are a good person, so we believe that they wouldn't intentionally mislead us. However, good people don't know everything and can still have false beliefs, right? When we hate someone, we tend to assume that they are a bad person, so we dismiss their words. However, bad people can still be in possession of some facts, can't they? In other words, moral character and intellectual knowledge are two different realms of existence. You can be morally good and intellectually ignorant at the same time. You can be morally bad but intellectually knowledgeable at the same time.

3) Vet Your Sources: You are human. Humans have limited time and energy for doing research. You can't know everything. You will make mistakes out of ignorance. Be forgiving of yourself. Throughout life, we sometimes have no choice but to rely on others and trust in their knowledge and expertise. What makes a source trustworthy? Here are some important points to consider:

- What is the source of their knowledge and expertise? Do they have the relevant educational and/or experiential qualifications? If they are a professional, do they have the requisite certificate, license, and/or other documentation that proves their qualifications? If you're not sure about these things, there are lots of forums online where you can ask questions to people who actually work in the field - use social media to your advantage. One sentence structure I always laugh at is "I'm not a scientist but..." Stop listening right then and there because they're basically telling you not to trust them!

- Is there a better source out there? Do you have a tendency to be loyal against your better judgment? When you're young and/or lack worldly experience, you're more easily taken in by interesting ideas and the charismatic people spouting them. However, once you've been around the block a few times, you start to see how ideas get recycled and regurgitated and repackaged. Truly new and revolutionary ideas are few and far between. Whatever idea you're enamored with, there are probably lots of people out there who are already familiar with it. Talk to those people to get a more realistic perspective on the matter (this is especially important for Ns to do). The idea may indeed be a good one, but that doesn't mean there isn't a darker side to it as well. One important thing that modern society has lost, to its great detriment, is respect for elders and their wisdom. With the hyperfocus on youth, we forget that there are people out there who've been there and done that, perhaps many times over. Tap into that treasure trove of information and you could save yourself quite a lot of heartache. In my teens, my parents always side-eyed me for making friends with older people, probably because they were afraid I would get groomed for abuse or something (a very valid concern!) Actually, I was only interested in learning from their experience.

- Are they principled in their dealings with people? Do they have a "code" or standards of conduct that they always follow? Do they make a strong effort to be objective, honest, fair, and well-rounded when they present information? What stake do they have in earning your trust? How do they stand to benefit from your trust? Are they completely transparent about the benefits they receive? When you enter a relationship with someone, even if it's a parasocial relationship, make sure that you understand what each party stands to gain and lose from the interaction. What are you being asked to give? Is it going to be a fair exchange?

Relationships, real-life or virtual, come and go and end for all kinds of reasons. Throughout it all, it's important to remember that being trusting is a virtue. If someone chooses to take advantage of your trust and exploit it for their own self-interest, THEY are in the wrong, not you. Don't blame the victim! All you wanted was to improve yourself and your life. Your intention is good.

In case it needs to be said, just because you've been burned before, doesn't mean that there aren't any trustworthy people out there. The world is full of good and bad and everything in between. The remedy to social threats isn't to become cynical and give up on trusting people, as this would just plunge you into a new form of hell where you've lost your humanity and live in paranoid isolation.

The remedy is to make sure that you take the time to really know someone well before placing too much trust in them. Don't let excitement override your better judgment. Also, Si types often approach trust and loyalty as "set it and forget it". Remember that trust should be earned over time and loyalty should be constantly negotiated throughout a relationship. You can and should revoke your trust and loyalty at any point a person shows you that they aren't deserving.

[hawkeykirsah]

212th Food Challenge

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30879167   

As so often, it all started with a simple observation.

    The troopers couldn’t miss the fact that Kenobi did the same thing at every meal.

    They watched their General yet again pull out a bottle filled with a red sauce and liberally apply it to the proffered food but no one approached the man himself. Instead, whispers filled the mess hall.

    “Did you see the red stuff the General put on today’s rations?”

    “He took something out of a bag and sprinkled it over the meal.”

    “Do all Jedi do that?”

    “Some kind of seasoning, I’d say.”

    “Alpha, what did the General add to his food?” they asked the ARC trooper who had spent even more time with Kenobi than any of them so far. Alpha-17 simply smirked.

    They had heard of seasoning of course but food in the mess hall was much like food on Kamino—a nutritious sludge with little taste—and the less said about ration bars, the better. For now they watched, glancing among themselves and wondering which brother would be the first to cave and ask. The Jedi Commander, Skywalker, they noticed, tended to add much less of the seasoning to his portions, and never the red sauce the General was so fond of.

***

    Over the next two months small changes took place. Alpha-17 returned to Kamino to become lead instructor at the training facility in Tipoca City (taking Cody with him), Skywalker was promoted to General, taking command of his own unit and  leaving the 212th without a Commander for several weeks until Cody returned, but still no one asked the General about the red sauce. 

***

    They watched the General offer Cody a seat at his table, who hesitated briefly before sitting down.

    "Sir," the commander asked, eying the bottle the general had just set on the table. "can other troopers sit here as well?"

    Kenobi looked up in surprise. "Why, of course."

    Wooley glanced around before sliding into a seat, followed by a number of other troopers. Wordlessly they watched him uncap the bottle and generously apply it to the daily serving of mystery meat.

    “Is something wrong, gentlemen?” the general asked mildly. He looked down at his armor and frowned. “Did I get red on me?”

    “No sir,” Cody answered. He took a deep breath, finally bringing up the nerve to ask the question that had been burning in so many troopers’ minds. “We were just wondering what it is you put on all your food.”

    All eyes were on the general. Kenobi put his head back and laughed. “Is that why you’ve all been watching me like shriek-hawks at every meal?” He pushed the bottle toward the middle of the table. “It’s a hot sauce. Go ahead and try it. Don’t use too much of it, though. A few drops will probably be enough.”

    “But sir,” Waxer spoke up, giving the bottle a careful shake, “you added more than a few drops to your food.”

    Kenobi dipped his head. “Ah, yes. But I’m also used to it. It can be an unpleasant sensation for someone not accustomed to it.” He paused and sighed. “Anakin never quite developed a taste for it, I’m sorry to say. Wooley, you don’t want to put any more hot sauce on that.”

    Wooley frowned at the red dots dappling today’s mystery meat and handed the sauce bottle to Boil.

    They all added hot sauce—and all reached for something to drink, coughing as the burning sensation ran down their throats.

    “Do all Jedi enjoy spicy food?” Crys coughed, thumping a fist against his chest. “My lips are tingling.”

    “Not at all,” the general replied. “There are so many different species living at the temple that the taste and variety of food is quite numerous. Some enjoy the different flavors spices add to a meal without the heat, others eat food that makes this,” he pointed at the sludge on his tray, “seem almost flavorful, and again others enjoy food that is so spicy your eyes will begin to water when you enter the room. One of my friends does not enjoy spice at all and Anakin always claims the only reason I need so much hot sauce is because I’ve cauterized my gustatory nerves by now.”

    He glanced at the troopers around him and found matching alarmed looks on their faces.

    “Oh, don’t worry, my taste buds work just fine,” the general said, smiling. He went on softly, “You can get used to it but you don’t have to. There are other spices you can add that, ah, are less likely to inflict pain. If you wish, I will share some of my spices with you during our next meal.”  

***

    The General made good on his promise.

    The next day he set a variety of powders down in the center of the table and gave them a quick overview over each sample, explaining the different kinds of heat from earthy-warm to tangy-sharp.

    Cody turned a jar over in his hand thoughtfully. “I think we should introduce these to our cooks.”

    Kenobi hummed. “Perhaps I should give them a quick rundown. Don’t look at me like that, Cody. I promise I will advise caution. Additionally we could put spice racks on every table in the mess hall. I will add it to our next requisition order.”

***

    The spice racks found their way onto the mess hall tables and it was only a matter of hours before the first trooper voiced what had been in the back of their minds to one of his squad.

    “I bet I can handle more heat than you can.”

    There was no way his brothers in arms could let that slide and they squared off surrounded by their squadmates. It did not take long for a small crowd to form around the table, watching the two troopers slowly increasing the amount of hot sauce in their servings. Bets were placed, credits changed owners once one of the two troopers conceded, and a new challenge was offered. Somebody asked “Do you think the Corrie Guard has tried any of these spices?”, a hint of envy tingeing their voice at the thought that their brothers on Coruscant didn’t have to rely on mess hall food. Cody snorted. That was surely the only positive thing about being part of the guard, and it by no means made up for having to deal with snobby politicians on a daily basis. Still, he would have to ask Fox or Thorn or Thire the next time they talked.

    The Commander watched the same spiel take place over several days before putting his foot down and the rules for the 212th Food Challenge up. If there was to be a competition, it should at least be organized.

***

    Naturally it was only a matter of time before somebody got too sure of themselves after winning several rounds in a row and asked the General for a match. Cody suppressed a sigh watching his superior officer flash a grin at the trooper and take a seat. Kenobi eyed the hot sauce.

    “What are the rules? Are we only allowed to use the hot sauce or can we add various spices?” he asked. “Because this dish calls for a different kind of spice than this particular hot sauce.”

    “That’s assuming the cooks actually use the spices you requisitioned, sir,” Longshot pointed out.

    Kenobi frowned. “I would hope so. I gave them the base recipe for this after all, along with a few suggestions for variations. But I suppose the flavor of the dish isn’t the main focus here, is it? It’s solely about the heat, not about staying true to the flavor.” The corner of his mouth quirked up, “In that case, Blaze, do try to live up to your name.”

    Cheering erupted around the table and the trooper in question blushed and took the first bite.

    Some time later Blaze called quits, his eyes watering and his nose running while their general looked mostly unaffected.

    “Sir,” Blaze sniffled as credits changed hands between the surrounding troopers, “how do we know you’re not cheating with the Force?”

    Kenobi laughed and leaned forward, beckoning Blaze closer. The trooper followed suit, looking at his smiling general expectantly.

    “You don’t. You’ll just have to trust me.”

    Tumultuous laughter exploded around them and more credits changed owners; the food competition was not the only thing being bet on in the 212th. 

[amorousadepti]

❈| genshin hands

characters: diluc, jean, kaeya, venti, eula, zhongli, xiao, ningguang, beidou, childe

warnings: vague descriptions of blood, scars, and canon-typical violence; allusions to abuse in eula’s section. 

length: 1.1k 

as often covered by gloves as they are, it’s rare that anyone gets a good look at diluc’s hands. without a weapon in his grip, they feel... clumsy. graceless, too large, and he knows that they aren’t a pretty sight. the skin of his knuckles and palms is rough with burn scars that spiral past his wrists, trailing up his forearms. but his hands are always pleasantly warm to the touch, and he is far more capable of gentleness than he thinks; the skin between each finger is softer, more sensitive, and if you watch closely you can see the way he shivers when you lace your fingers with his

the acting grandmaster has strong, sinewy hands. jean bears a tremendous amount of responsibility, and she bears it well; her hands never shake, at least not where anyone else would see. when she was younger, more impulsive, she would sometimes practice so long and so obsessively that her hands bled, but she has learned moderation now (though lisa would probably appreciate it if she learned a little more.) comradely gestures come easily to her - a gentle squeeze of your shoulder, or holding your hands in hers as she thanks you for all your hard work - but she blushes if you return them in kind, hiding a shy smile behind her fist

kaeya’s hands are always just slightly cooler to the touch than the average person; a godsend on hot days, he’ll happily lay his icy palms against your skin if you ask (though not without a little bit of playful teasing.) he has his fair share of scars and scrapes - one doesn’t become a cavalry captain without earning it, after all - but he takes good care of his hands, often rubbing beeswax into his palms to keep the skin soft and supple. he lets klee paint his nails sometimes, and proudly flaunts the results no matter how much polish ends up smeared on his fingertips rather than on the nail itself

from a glance at his hands, it’s easy to tell that venti is a musician. his hands are long and delicate, a joy to watch as they dance over the strings of a lyre or the holes of a flute. his calloused fingertips are often stained with ink from scribbling down bits of inspiration. he’s given to gesticulating when he talks, grand, sweeping gestures to accompany the most dramatic moments of whatever story he’s telling, but it’s the smaller movements which are most notable - the way he reaches out to trace inscrutable carvings on shattered ruins, or the swipe of his thumb over your cheekbone as he cups your face in his hands, committing you to memory

eula's hands are softer than she would like. though she is by no means weak, her hands are surprisingly smooth and unmarked, other than a number of old scars that crisscross the backs of her palms; not reminders of combat, but the long-healed remnants of the lawrence family’s educational regime. considering her reputation in mondstadt and her place in the knights, she's more accustomed to violence than she is to friendly touch - which means that the first time you grab her hand, happily leading her through the streets, she's uncharacteristically lost for words. she will remember this moment. for the purposes of revenge, of course.

zhongli’s hands are elegant, smooth, and precise, usually folded over his chest or steepled under his chin in thought. unlike some, he rarely wastes energy on unnecessary movements - though when he’s engaged in the telling of a particularly long or passionate anecdote, he has been known to gesture for emphasis. he has a habit of handling items very delicately, just with the tips of his fingers, and sometimes goes out of his way to seek out pleasing textures; a broad category that covers everything from the warm thrum of radiant-grade noctilucous jade to the feeling of your hair between his fingers as you rest in his lap after a long day

xiao has surprisingly small hands, almost delicate at first glance - though he'd be offended if you were ever to say so out loud. but his slender fingers are deft and strong, and patterned with the scars of many, many battles. the bends of them are heavily calloused from handling his spear, and he tends to unconsciously clench and unclench his fists in times of deep thought or incredible stress. his hands are capable of great violence and tenderness in equal measure, though he’s had fewer opportunities for the latter. he imagines touching you far more often than he'd like to admit, but always kills the impulse before it can become action - adepti have no desires, after all

the tianquan of the liyue qixing spares no expense when it comes to her personal upkeep, and ningguang’s hands are no exception. beneath her silken gloves, her hands are elegant and well-manicured, but surprisingly tough; the long years she spent clawing her way to the top left a fair share of scars. she’s not ashamed of the evidence of her hard work, but she does savor being able to take better care of her hands now, and her collection of lotions, scrubs, and polishes is the envy of many a liyue noble. when she’s in a teasing mood she may present her hand for you to kiss, and her skin always smells faintly of glaze lilies

every scar and mark on beidou's hands comes with a story behind it, and she'll happily regale you with each one over a couple of good beers. her hands are warm, large, and rough, with thick fingers and pronounced knuckles. they ache often, and she claims that she can always tell when a storm's rolling in by the throbbing in her hands (and she's almost always right, too.) she's long-accustomed to the pain, but if you want to see the captain of the crux melt under your touch? offer her a hand massage. it's a rare bit of pampering that she definitely needs, and she'll be sure to pay your generosity back ten-fold

childe’s hands are always in motion: twirling his daggers and bow, fiddling some component of a ruin guard between his fingers, compulsively adjusting his hair and clothes. he has a bad habit of biting his nails down to the quick, and wears gloves not only to protect against inclement weather but to try and train himself out of doing so (these efforts have yet to work.) he’s naturally quite handsy, but will dial it back if you genuinely dislike it; allow him to run wild, though, and you’ll find him casually grabbing your hand or petting your hair at every opportunity, whether in private or (and perhaps especially) in public

[bigbangclappin]

Counterblow

Pairing: YoongiXReader, with mentions of Yoonmin

Word count: 2.3K

Genre: Angst

Warnings: implied smut, mentions of infidelity, mentions of revenge. This does mention Yoongi's Bisexuality and if that offends anyone then...I have no idea aside from we can't be friends.

Summary: Born and bred to be the wife of a king. You anticipated obstacles in your marriage as you were forewarned. But never had you thought Yoongi would leave your heart mangled on the floor.

To be jealous of a man is distasteful; to be jealous of two is loathsome. 

You stared at your husband and his consort with baleful eyes. How you wished your gaze would set that useless scholar on fire. 

With clenched fists you stood with all the refined grace instilled in you since birth. Men were all the same no matter who they lusted after. 

A terrible misfortune it was for you that your husband, the king, had one eye for women and the other for men. 

Of course only you and few of the higher court officials knew this about the king. Although a small detail to you, others would feel quite unsettled. 

His peculiar taste had no effect on you when it was reassured that you were the apple of your husband’s eye. 

His Words seemed to buzz around in your skull like an angry nest of hornets. In your gut you felt like he told you a lie in order to keep you and his consort because how foolish could he be to flaunt this relationship in your face. Why make a fool out of you in front of the court? He wasn’t being discreet like you discussed.

The blood in your veins boiled as you recall the memory of him with his consort Jimin. 

Doubtful any relations in the physical form would take place in such a public place as his palace You made the mistake of entering although it was your husband's chamber in which you were allowed to enter freely being the queen mother. The memory of what you saw inflamed your heart; the man that you loved and given your whole heart to was Taking on an intimate relationship. 

The cold stab of jealousy you had felt that day slowly turned the feelings you had, the pure love that you had once felt for your husband into bitter resentment.

You were never under the naïve impression that your husband was bound to only you as he did have the right to a harem. 

The upbringing in which you were raised attempted to prepare you for such an issue. Nothing your mother or sister said prepared you for the pain of a broken heart. Whether it was man or woman it didn’t matter the betrayal still stung. Your husband told you many times that you owned his heart. What a bold faced lie.

The heat that had risen to your cheeks at the sheer embarrassment you felt, the jealousy, the betrayal, made tears rush down your face and the only thing your husband could say to you on the matter is that he was a “free spirit“ you scoffed at the poor excuse he gave you.

Your heart has never been the same; it's like it turned to ice and the barriers you surround yourself with were your own kingdom. Never would you ever allow that man to make a fool of you again. How daft you had been to believe that men could ever truly love one person.

You had vowed to yourself from that day on you would only give what you had to and nothing more.

Yoongi had believed that everything was the same and you had forgiven him. Playing the role Of the dutiful queen not once bringing up the past because you knew that conversation would’ve led to a dead end.

Oh no your plan for revenge wasn’t as obvious as your husband like to think it would be. He had kept an eye on you for the first couple of weeks since you found out that he was laying with Jimin.

You were smarter than that and he should’ve known that. A woman scorned is a powerful, painful, terrible thing to behold. A woman could bide her time like no other in order to get back at the one who broke her heart.

That’s exactly what you did. The court expected you to produce an heir quickly to continue on your husband's line of succession. One month after that haunting scene you had fallen victim to your weak heart and allowed your husband into your private quarters. Shortly thereafter you had fallen ill. Upon the king’s command the royal physician tended to you. He gave you news that wasn’t a large surprise but you were happy much the same. Your husband was delighted; his supporters were thrilled.

The smile on Yoongi’s face when it was announced that you had given birth to a healthy boy is what spurned your idea for revenge. The son you bore for him would never have the bond that you did with him. He would know only of your nurturing and love. 

Afterall how could revenge be any more sweet than never knowing the love of your own child?

Your young prince’s loyalty would never be to his father but to you.

________________________________________________________________

At the tender age of two your son might as well Have just been your son. When his father attempted to do anything with him he would just cry and cry for you. As if his father was a stranger that wanted nothing more than to hurt him. 

True enough, you thought to yourself, hurt a child’s mother, hurt the child right? 

Whenever the man asked you what he had done to upset your child you would just shrug your shoulders and say he was perfectly fine a few minutes ago. You would state it’s probably just a phase.

It wasn’t just a phase. Your baby took after you and was a good judge of character. His father was fickle and unsure. Where your baby was consistent and wise even if he was just a toddler.

Which brought you to the situation you were currently in. You had taken breakfast with your son and you had made it a habit to eat without the king. Especially when multiple reports accounted for him being in the library with his consort.  If he wanted to play happy families then he would have to join you when you had time. Your son would not wait to eat because his father’s priorities were askew.

Sungho was happily munching on his porridge and you smiled as you wiped his face with a napkin nearby when your trusted lady in waiting came into your chamber.

“My lady the king approaches and he does not look pleased.“ Jaeun stated seemingly panicked as her eyes shifted between you, your son, and the door that she knew your husband was going to come barreling through at any moment.

“Do not fret my dear he does not frighten me.“

“But your highness—”

The doors to your chamber suddenly crashed against the wood behind it creating a large racontorous sound that spooked your child and your lady in waiting.

There stood your husband, the king in his black and gold dress robes, his long hair that was tied up into a neat ponytail nearly fell in his eyes. He had an angry, fierce look in those tiger shaped orbs as he took in the breakfast your son and you began without him.

“Were we not supposed to have breakfast together?“ Your husband asked you with a certain grit of agitation to his tone.

“I wasn’t sure if you were going to be able to make it. Namjoon had said this morning that you were preoccupied in the library and our son was hungry.”

  The smile on your face would fool even your worst enemy that everything you were saying was truth and not something planned out of spite. 

You giggled at your little Sungho when he looked at you with more rice on his chubby cheeks. 

Hiding the raging wave of envy behind your child was a habit now. Somehow you thought Yoongi was beginning to catch on.

His nostrils flared in aggravation, “Jaeun please tend to your other tasks…”

Eyes narrowing you weren’t daft; he was trying to clear the room and you weren’t having it.

You raised your hand when your maid began shuffling at the king’s order, she stilled at your wordless gesture.

“Jaeun is fine your highness,” you replied and then pointed to the unoccupied chair across from you. 

Your maid was privy to every little detail between you and the king. Unbeknownst to Yoongi of course, her loyalty also resided with you. She had been your greatest companion and friend throughout your tumultuous relationship.

Your husband glared harshly before forcefully pulling the chair out. It then became a battle of sheer will not to engage in conversation. Preoccupied by Sungho made things a lot easier.

“You declined the invitation to my chamber last night…”

Your husband broke first. Of course he did. He had begun after all this time to feel the iciness you displayed toward him.

You barely spared him a glance as you wiped your son’s mouth, “I wasn’t feeling well.”

He scoffed, his jaw set in anger, “This illness only comes about when I request time with you. You seem well enough now.”

“Very strange isn't it?” You retorted coolly, doing your best to hide your smirk.

“Increasingly.” He spat in annoyance, “Perhaps you should see the physician.”

“I doubt that the physician needs to be bothered your Highness. I'm sure it will subside.”

The king’s agitation became evident after your last statement, “Since when have we become so formal with one another that I am no longer addressed with warmth?”

An eyebrow lifted involuntarily at his question, “I don’t understand what you mean your highness…”

“That is what I mean!” He barked at you, “your highness? When have you ever addressed me as such? It was always Yeobo, my king, my love or at the very least Yoongi!”

You sat quiet in thought after his outburst wondering if now was the time to play your cards but quickly decided against it.It was too soon.

“I had no idea you didn't like being addressed as such my king. I'll make a conscious effort to forgo that title if it makes you unhappy.”

Your eyes followed your husband’s Adam’s apple bob in a frustrated swallow, “why do I feel as if you’re falling away from me?”

Because you had you wanted to scream but you remained poised. Regarding him with fake sadness and empathy.

“I’m sorry that I’ve been making you feel that way, Sungho is at the age where he needs me with him or he does not feel safe. I didn’t mean to make you feel neglected. I thought Jimin had been keeping you occupied while I need to be with Sungho.”

Something in Yoongi’s jaw ticked at the little jab you had thrown in. 

Good you had thought to yourself. Maybe he would realize how asinine he sounded. Complaining about how you spent too much time with your son while he had a companion to warm his bed at night. 

“It isn’t the same…” he said quietly with pain behind his guarded eyes. 

Too little too late.

“I apologize your highness” you said, reaching for his hand, giving it a small squeeze. “I’ll meet you in your palace tonight if you wish after Sungho falls asleep.”

Placing a kiss on top of your hand he was easily appeased with your answer.

Pretending not to enjoy the intimacy your husband showered you with that night proved to be easier than you originally anticipated. 

He placed steamy kisses along your neck and shoulders. Right where he knew it would drive you crazy but he received no response. No indication that you were enjoying yourself the least bit. 

“What’s wrong Jagi?” He asked with genuine concern.

“Hmm?” You responded with deliberate disinterest hoping to wound his pride. “Oh I was just wondering if the kitchen received my request for fresh berries.”

Point blank you shot his ego down. He’s trying to reconnect with you and you’re ignoring him for frivolous cravings. Has he lost his touch with you? Has it been so long since you let him have you that he didn’t know your body anymore? 

He let a humorless chuckle pass his lips incredibly shocked at the hurt he was feeling. It worsened when you lifted the shoulder of your night dress back up over your exposed skin. Had you just rejected him?

“Now that I think of it I should probably check on the preparations for Sungho’s birthday. I’m sure Seokjin is still in the kitchen—” you rose from your husband’s bed but you were halted by the strong grip on your wrist.

“Seokjin can wait!” Yoongi snapped, pulling you down onto his lap. His long blonde hair sheltering you from anything that could take your attention away.

“I haven’t had a single moment with you to myself since you gave birth to our son…” he mumbled into your neck with what you thought was a sniffle.

A small string of guilt tugged at your heart at the pitiful sound. You needed to remind yourself that he did this to your relationship not you. Had he given any thought to your feelings he would’ve realized his mistake.

“Yoongi-ah I’m sorry I thought because you had Jimin you wouldn’t be lonely while I took on the gift of motherhood…” 

“He isn’t you!” He snapped harshly, “You’re the love of my life and I feel like you’re slipping through my fingers…”

He had whispered the last portion of his confession. You sat back enough to take in his harsh features. His pale cheeks blushed pink from his flood of emotions. You touched his cheek and brushed his long hair behind his ear. 

There was nothing you could say to make him feel better. Truly you didn’t want to. The taste of his own medicine tasted bitter just like your heart. He deserved to feel the loss of you by his side. 

“You have no reason to worry my love,” you whispered to him, your stomach doing somersaults at the lie. 

Placing a kiss on his forehead you let him revel in the somewhat fake comfort you gave him. 

He needed to learn that either he continued his affair or he loses you and Sungho for good.

[terrence-silver]

Headcanon list of the property (namely houses) Terry owns:

(Written on my Discord in 2021!) for @atmostories ​

1. Vegas - the first piece of revenue terry ever owned, by inheritance - now in a vaguely neglected state, just like it was when it became legally his and for years prior, while his parents still actually based there, this family house is a living incarnation of something having seen 'better days' as something that was built post-war and then quickly fell out of fashion and usage mid-century and then took to standing oddly vacation during his time in Vietnam and by extension, college. after that, there was somehow less and less time and reason to keep returning. the once-glitzy, stylized wallpapers are now torn and moldy, the much-beloved chandeliers are starting to collapse, the imported tiles are cracked and some of the decorative window frames and broken and busted out. his mother's rose garden is overgrown and dry. One can still see the eerie imprint of the tires where his father used to park his car. The house of his childhood was once the pinnacle of good-taste and glamour, now, merely a forgotten house on a dusty trail roadside. You'd never guess a now Billionaire grow up here in this state. Terry never had the desire to repair it. It's not like a museum for him. A painful, yet fond memory. A reminder of how far he's come. One could, technically, still live in it, but it's akin to living with ghosts still clinging unto the old glory days. 

2. Outside the LA mansion(s), he has a loft in New York - a very business oriented space and it's probably, the second or third piece of property he's acquired after his company expanded and he's found himself needing to fly out frequently from coast to coast. He doesn't live here. He never quite has. but, he likes the sound of it. he likes the impression of it too. What it means for his status. The apartment, although spacious and grand, reminds hims of an over-sized office or a joint (it's kind of what it is, ultimately), and the atmospheric setting of that is fairly intentional. He has no personalized items here. Nothing at all. He tends not to make any of his places of dwelling particularly homely or a 'home' in layman terms. They're utilitarian. They serve a purpose. They evoke envy. They're useful. They're practical. They cost money and sell equally as good on the market. They're a keychain. They're part of a dollhouse collection. He's just too big to think in terms of settling down, and might've gotten this 'piece' as he refers to it, almost as if talking of a watch or a tie, and not an actual apartment, when Dynatox began to take off, money was high, and he started to grow rather cynical and in extreme need to prove himself with material goods, regardless if he personally enjoyed them or not. 

3. I still firmly headcanon he doesn't care too much for continental Europe in the classical sense. In fact, I can see him being annoyed by it. He cares about what Europe means for his image in front of others if the question ever happens to pop up. So he probably has an estate somewhere, but get a load of this - during his excursion around the continent, he no doubt sat down and pondered; where is most expensive and most exclusive? Ah, yes! there! That's perfect! That's what i'm going with! So, he probably got some old, historic 18th century vineyard seaside luxury-mansion off of the Cote d'Azure on the French riviera which you can only access with a yacht or something super excessive like that. I imagine it hangs off of a coastline of sharp, white rocks, overlooking a private beach and is riddled with columns, old statues, fountains, lush gardens, hunting grounds, dock ports, stables, neatly trimmed lawns and the whole shebang. The staff work there all year 'round even though Terry is literally never there. Many of them have never even seen him. He merely brings investors there sometimes. Invites them over for a summer getaway so they can gawk at the dining room consisting of golden-framed mirrors supposedly lifted from the court of Marie Antoinette. Terry gets off on their shock, to be honest. This is also incidentally the type of home his mother would have loved and dreamed up in her wildest fantasies. It's the type of home his father would've bought if he hit the slot machine lottery and now terry has it. It's like, viscerally, in a strange way, he's posthumously appeased them, albeit decades too late. 

4. He gets a spot in a non-extradition country, Mali, Capo Verde, Nicaragua, and the like...and he does it in advance. as a 'just-in-case' kind of way. Now, he's confident in his power. He's confident in his ability. He's a cult-status behemoth. There's no shaking him. He bribes judges. Laughs off accusations. He shrugs off any and all controversy. But, he's also a man with a back-up plan in the long run, because times change. He's smart and self-aware. Analytical. and maybe he's gotten this abode, this sanctuary, as far back as the 70's, back in Dynatox's very infancy, when he, regardless, already knew which route he'll take the company, and that there could be backlash and consequences, if not in ten years, then maybe in thirty, forty or even fifty years, nonetheless, he came prepared. Isn’t stupid. He’s tactical. He doesn't even count this as a house or a property. It's refuge, rather. Low-key. Extremely hidden and unassuming. Not shabby, though. It's still a hyper-secure private island resort den though, where nobody comes and goes without it being known. More of a fortress, really. If he goes out, he goes out in style. Somewhere he could potentially go to if he needs to think on his next move and in order to regain control. He also may or may not have some more of these safe-houses out and about. One of them is in Switzerland, close to the banking hub that handles a chunk of his capital. He thinks of everything strategically. 

5. Aspen winter vacation mansion and AND - wow, he really doesn't give a rat's ass about this one. First of all, he doesn't care for winter or winter sports as such, prone to Californian summers. Second of all, he doesn't care for this particular piece. third of all, well, everyone in his echelon has one, almost stereotypically so (his neighbors, if one can even have a neighboring estate, are all fellow Billionaire Ceos and Millionaire celebrities - he figures he's right where he belongs), and now, so does he - another fancy addition of his keychain - in fact, it's almost safe to say his own inner-sanctum staff cares more about this one then Terry himself does. I can imagine Snake, Mike and Dennis enjoying it briefly as they snowmobile around and cause havoc, but even they get tired of it because Snake goes like 'Nah, LA needs me. I'm its bad boy after all'. This one, for sure, is empty constantly and Terry despises how it's made mostly out of decorative, carved wood and it disgusts him, the naturalness of it all, so he opts not to be in what he considers an over-sized log cabin...even though the space of it is colossally luxurious to such an amazing degree, that it's truly a wasted space and investment. He pondered awarding the grounds to Margaret for her retirement, but he feels about about confining her to what he feels is 'a frozen wasteland'. which it is not, but anyway - this is a very unloved home that truly starts to show how spoiled and egoistic he's become. 

6. Studio penthouses in Hongkong, Shanghai, Tokyo, Seoul and in Beijing. He has all five, and again, much like in the case of the New York condo, these especially, are hideously unimportant as of the present moment, but at the same time, tremendously important too. They serve as a business sleepover spot, because on occasion, he doesn't want to utilize a hotel, upon mere principle - he figures his position in life earned him the right to be picky and choosy, just for the sake of it. It's somewhere to lay one's head down with a measure of class and good taste. I can envision Terry using these, instead, as hideaways, and he drifts from one to the other almost constantly, and it's extremely hard to get into his track. Could he be in one? In the other? In neither? Entirely hard to tell, as they're deliberately in the glitziest, most urban center parts of the city, amidst all the traffic and lights and streets, where it's easy to get lost and even easier not to get found in, conveniently, all the offices and business hubs are close-by and infinitely thriving, nonstop, never taking a break, generating noise, vice, power, electricity, movement, life, death, smog, money, all the things Terry lives and thrives off too, by extension, observing the scene from high up, in his cooled, controlled, minimalist glass and metal tower, unfettered. 

7. Wherever his beloved is from, he secretly acquires a spot in. I can see him doing this before you two even get particularly 'serious', so to speak, way back in his poorsona phase and he just never tells you - maybe he never quite tells you afterwards either, until much, much later. He wants to gage it. Taste it. To him, buying a piece of revenue or property is no different then sampling a particular sort of caviar he hasn't tried before - a caviar native to you, apparently. So, of course he's curious. House-shopping is literally so beneath his budget, that he can easily re-create what is a very elaborate and complicated type of indirect stalking through the act alone, because as i mentioned in my fic before, he 'wants to take your world and place it into his backpocket, like a space in miniature'. It belongs to him now, in a sense. He's in control of it. In control of himself too. This is how he shows a particle of his fascination and obsession. So, this is how it would look like then? In a different light? If he was just a normal nobody guy and he lived with normal nobody beloved you, in a normal nobody home, in an alternative universe? Maybe he's...repulsed at first, that he showed such insipid weakness, but he doesn't ever relinquish this place, regardless of where your relationship goes or doesn't go. No. He ironically comes full circle. this is the first house, ever since the house in Vegas, he's actually felt emotional attachment to. Actually cared for personally, begrudgingly so. The house with least use. least value. least bragging-power. least anything. It's rather mediocre, in a quaint, pretty sort of way and it's potentially the type he figures you could, perhaps, afford, vaguely speaking, and maybe, it's intentionally entirely empty. bare, white walls and floors. Terry hoped or still hopes, one day, he can have you furnish it for him, so he can gift it to you and by extension, himself - but it's an sappy notion he keeps burying down.

[datawyrms]

Happy DannyMay everyone! i say while dropping this. For day one, Memories. sorta kinda sequel to this Half a Decade Late

He said he’d never hate them. Back when he thought it would only be a matter of time until he found a weakness, a flaw and squirmed free. He always had before. He didn’t like being captured, and he certainly didn’t like getting shoved into cages, but it was always temporary. A terrifying inconvenience. Something he’d shrug off eventually and forget. Lately he was starting to realize he’d forget that he ever considered thinking charitably. Just like all the other things he couldn’t quite remember.

They took everything. His freedom, his limbs, his skin, his voice. So many things he had the misfortune of learning he could recover from with enough time. Really broke the idea that anything about you was special. Did it matter that they ripped him open when the green slime he was made of would eventually cover the hole without even a sign of the pain it caused him? He just stopped caring. Ghosts didn’t feel pain. Maybe if he believed that enough, he wouldn’t need to feel it. Hurt was just a matter of perspective.

He was changing, apparently. The spectral copies of his human organs they stole over and over again stopped being perfect copies. Sloppy. Apparently his body was forgetting what the real ones were like. He didn’t remember the last time he’d been human anyway. That was fine. It was the only real way he could bother them now, being ‘less useful’. Obviously he didn’t need them that badly. He envied some of his fellow prisoners. They were just green inside. Nothing the vultures wanted, nothing for them to mutter and prod at while he struggled uselessly.

He didn’t really know why he still bothered to do that. It never worked. Some impulse. Just better than keeping still. He never really was a human, was he? Humans didn’t treat other humans like this. So he wasn’t one. So why did he ever think he was?

Tie was weird. Maybe having a soul made you act all funny. He’d been tempted to change her name, to no-mask or just face, but the words didn’t feel right, sort of caught on his tongue. Even when he didn’t have one sometimes! Tie just slid off easily. Like he’d said it a lot, or something like it.

So the newbie remained Tie. And Tie was weird. A good kind of weird? She didn’t just tell him to shut up, anyway. Most of them were boring like that. Though not getting shocked into unconsciousness did make the days tend to drag a bit more. She did make his head hurt sometimes, with all the weird reactions Tie made. It always passed though.

He kept playing with the lights up there so they would flicker and crackle, just to check if it was a Tie day. Sure, that got a good amount of shocks when it wasn’t Tie, but they were always grumpy after he’d lost a limb or two. It was almost amusing again. That was the word. Maybe?

“You don’t remember Amity at all?”

Frustration and anger that was directed at him, but also not. Tie was super strange like that. “Why would I?” His response just made her eyes narrow more, but she didn’t do anything to take it out on him. It was hilarious. 

“That’s where you’re from.”

“News to me.” Might be a lie, might not. Gun grunts said lots of weird stuff. He shifted position, watching her while upside down didn’t make it easier to tell if humans were lying or not, but did make her scowling funnier. “That’s where you’re from then? Or that other name you keep using.”

“You can’t actually be him. Fuck.” She was rubbing at her forehead, looking away at nothing. “You remember ghost hunters but not Amity Park?”

“Hey! Names are hard, Tie. Isn’t like you know the name of every town you’ve ever been in.”

“No, but I remember the one I lived in most of my life!”

“Good for you! I’d clap but I’m kinda under armed for the task.” Under armed. He snickered as she only rolled her eyes at his joke, but it only made him think of another one. “Isn’t like a ghost lives anywhere.”

“You’re in here for hell knows how long and you can’t get better jokes?!”

Tie’s irritation just made it funnier. “These are gold! Way better than the stuff you guys laugh at.”

“Like what?”

“Oh you know.” The humour of the moment passed as he got back up, wondering if he should give the old ice trick another go. The noises were fun. “Like how the ghost won’t eat, but ghosts don’t breathe either. So the ghost can’t do much to stop ya.” As if Tie didn’t know. She still made the weird pinched expressions though. Why bother? It didn’t really matter if she actually had a soul still. Those ones just quit and then there’d be a new newbie. “Lots of you think that’s reaaaaal funny.” He stuck out his tongue, gagging. “Gross gun grunts.”

“That’s not funny either.”

“Try breaking your funny bone a few times. That’ll fix it. Or was that computers?” He frowned, rubbing his fingers against his chin. Computers. What was it about computers again? Re-re-something? Like with bones when you...did something…

“Phantom!”

That jerked him out of his considerations. “Still not him!” Now that he checked, Tie looked like she’d been trying to get his attention for awhile again. That, or she’d figured out how to teleport closer to his cage. Both were very possible. Probably. 

“You didn’t hear a word I said, did you.”

“You were talking?”

“For someone who says he isn’t Phantom, it sure gets your attention fast.”

He shrugged. What did Tie expect? So what if he noticed it? It didn’t mean anything to him, personally. It was like comp-whatevers. “You could say the coats were coming and I’d do the same thing.”

“Doubt it. You remember Jack and Maddie maybe?” Tie hesitated, as if saying something to him actually mattered. “Your parents?”

“I’m a ghost. And possibly a starfish. Since I do the whole regenerating thing.” He’s pretty sure it’s starfish that do that. “I don’t think they’re big on families.” He thought that was pretty amusing, having like. Little voiceless things that cling to rocks as parents. Actually had a bit in common if you thought of his cage as a rock? Tie didn’t agree, based on how he was biting at her lip and clenching her fists. Still no shooting. Still super weird.

“Be a mercy killing at this point…” Tie wasn’t actually speaking to him, but it was interesting. Killing what? One of the other ghosts maybe. “Sam, Tucker? Any of them ring a bell?”

He certainly didn’t have a bell in here. “Sam...and Tucker are names?” He guessed, shuddering a little. Weird names. Made the gooey mess of ectoplasm he was made of wriggle when he said it. Like when he was struggling to digest something, uncomfortable and heavy and just making him want to move when he couldn’t. Though he could this time. Zipping up to the top of his cage helped shake the feeling off, at least. He wasn’t saying those again, no thank you. “You have weird tricks, Tie”

“They’re just names. I didn’t do anything to make you fly up there. I half thought you couldn’t do that anymore.”

Tie did have a bit of a point. When was the last time he’d flown up here? “Think I forgot I could?” He didn’t really move much in general. Not like he had anywhere to go, his cage didn’t really change.

She just looked tired. “This isn’t fixable.”

He wasn’t really paying attention, poking at the edges of his cage with his feet was pretty entertaining. It tingled a bit when he got pushed back, but flipping over in the air was easy. Why didn’t he float more? “Gun grunts don’t fix things, so Idonno why you care.”

Tie wasn’t paying much attention to him either, muttering to herself. “Manson would kill me for doing it. No way she’d believe you’re like this. Let alone the Fentons...”

Well, that was boring. He busied himself with counting how many seconds it took for the shock to stop coursing through him when he touched the walls. Though it was a bit tricky to keep track between tries.

“Skulker? Ember? You at least remember the ghosts, don’t you?”

“Are you just making names up now Tie?” They just sounded silly. The thought of someone named ‘Skulker’...who was also very tiny. Now that’d be funny. Kinda liked that idea actually.

“Probably don’t even remember the guy who put a million on your head…”

“A million whats? Questions? That’s more a you thing, Tie.”

“No, Vlad. The mayor?”

“The what?” Things weren’t funny anymore. He wasn’t cool and passive. That word, there’d been others but he didn’t even care what they’d been. The V had been enough to set his core to a furious pulsating heat of fury. His ice claws clung to the wall even as the buzzing in his skull grew stronger as the field tried to shove him back. “WHERE” He snared, not caring how his throat burned from the partial wail trying to scrabble out of his throat. Tie didn’t matter, nothing mattered and he actually missed his arm since not having it made it harder to keep his grip and snarl at the one backing away from his prison. “WHERE IS HE?” Oh he’d order anyone, and they’d listen or he’d shred them as soon as he got through- but his claws were cracking- green and red staining and corrupting the fine edge he’d honed so often. Why did he care? He didn’t know, didn’t want to know, he just had to act and now, just in case. The chance might slip away and he wouldn’t, they’d pay they’d pay, they’d PAY.

“Danny! Stop hurting yourself, he’s not here!” Tie was blathering, but at least backed away when he shrieked at her. Stupid Tie. Didn’t know anything. “Hell. You don’t even know why you’re mad, do you.”

He kept slamming the ice back in place, even as his arm weakened and started oozing. He didn’t need his legs, he didn’t need arms, he didn’t need anything. Just OUT. NOW. He snarled and snapped at the metal that grabbed his back and slammed him hard to the ground of his cage. It ignored him and the awful warmth that had consumed everything. He never won against it but now he had to keep trying because-because the anger? Because of something. The metal easily ignored the green surging pulses of electricity, just kept pressing down on him until he wasn’t solid enough to struggle, not strong enough to scream at it. The awful stabbing feeling in his core wanted him to act, but he couldn’t even defiantly flick his tail as he grew colder and slipped out of consciousness.

Everything hurt and it wasn’t even Friday. At least. He didn’t think it was? He’d have to ask Tie about it...if Tie showed up again. Something about her gave him a stab of unease. Might have something to do with all the green stains in here. Didn’t remember getting shot though. Strange. Must have done something. Maybe. Didn’t really matter.