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throneofsapphics · 11 months

Text

misted realities

Rowaelin x f!Reader

Summary: Aelin pressed her lips to your forehead, running a thumb over your cheek. “We’ll be back soon, love,” she murmured - as if you might hear, and tucked the blankets tightly around you. A wicked storm was brewing outside. Not uncommon for this time of year, but it felt like a bad omen.

Warnings: angst, injuries, mentions of torture/death, mentions of blood

Word Count: ~8k

A/N: based on this request! reader is fae, has earth-based magic.

“You never have time for me anymore,” you fought to keep your voice down, and clenched your fists to hide your shaking hands.

“Gods,” Aelin sighed. “We’re all busy,” she did look exhausted, small circles forming under the Queen’s eyes. Days would go by when the three of you barely passed a few sentences between each other. At least between you and them.

“I know,” you bit down on your bottom lip, willing the tears to disappear from the corners of your eyes. “I just want to spend more time with you.”

“Don’t cry,” Rowan’s curt tone shocked you. Tears were replaced by anger, beginning to simmer deep inside of you. “You see us everyday.” He’s right, you sleep in the same bed each night. But, as soon as they come in - they’re ready for bed. When they wake, it’s lucky if you have mere minutes to speak with them before they’re gone.

Your throat bobbed as you swallowed. “Right.”

Rowan’s eyes rolled, but he strode towards you, one hand braced on your shoulder, the other cupping your cheek and tilting your head up to look at him. His eyes searched your face, thumb wiping away one of the stray tears. “We’ll talk about this later.”

You took a step back, shaking off his grip.

“It’s always later,” you spit out.

Aelin’s fingertips rubbed at her temples as she glanced at the clock. “We don’t have time for this.”

They never have time, not anymore. In the beginning, it felt like they would always make time for you - always time to go out into the forest, to go into the city, to just exist together. Maybe you were being selfish, they’re the Queen and King of Terrasen for gods sake. But, where they used to seek you out, now you always chased after them and it was getting exhausting. Months of the same thing.

“Don’t worry about it,” you let out a slow breath, but it did nothing to abate the tightness in your chest. Aelin frowned, lips pressing into a tight line. “I’m … I'm just overthinking.”

Rowan’s look said; obviously, but Aelin still seemed a bit disgruntled. She glanced at the clock again.

“We have to go,” she glanced over to Rowan. He gave her a soft smile, shot a nod your way, and looped his arm through hers before leaving the room. You stared after them, at the closed door. Never, they’d never left like that before. Not even a hug, or a i’ll see you later. Or have a good day. You clenched your fists at your side, gripping the fabric tightly.

Space, maybe some time away from here would do you good. Ella had invited you on a trip, one you declined because you thought they would have a free day this weekend. But, at this point, who even knows if they’d want to spend it with you? You couldn’t put everything else on hold in the hopes that they might decide to grace you with their attention. If you remembered correctly, the trip began tomorrow.

Slipping on your boots, you left the castle as quickly as possible - to find her and tell her to add one to the itinerary.

It would be telling, that’s for certain. Either they’d miss you or … maybe realize they were better off without you. You prayed you could handle the truth, whatever it might be.

“I’m leaving for a trip with my cousins tomorrow, I’ll spend the night at Ella’s. It’s an early start.” You stood in the door of the bedroom, fresh out of a bath, a pack slung over your shoulder. She’d been thrilled and shocked you decided to come along. Excited enough you felt some shame - shame that you hadn’t spent time amongst your family. That you’d focused so much on your relationship it surprised them you would go along.

Aelin’s eyes flicked up from her book, her legs stretched across Rowan’s lap. “Be safe.”

How long had they been out here? Not bothering to come say hello to you? Rowan gave a curt nod. It felt like a clear dismissal, and you took it.

You gave them a tight smile, one they didn’t see, and strode for the door - shoulders back and head high. After you’d passed the gates, you realized they hadn’t asked where you were going, or when you would be back.

The Oakwald was gorgeous this time of year. Brannon’s forest. It always felt … peaceful. Like a place you could come to to escape the rest of your thoughts. The trip had gone well, visiting a few old friends in a neighboring province. A week long trip, and one of the best weeks you’d had in a while.

They were in the back of your mind, not consuming your thoughts, not constantly lingering in the front. All of your focus went to your family, your friends, and on spending quality time with them. It was a thing of beauty, and something that left you feeling revived. Alive again. You’d given too much of yourself to them, and received too little in return. King or Queen aside, you deserved more than half-assed attempts and short words. Your last interaction with them had sealed it. Anything you might have had at one point, had faded away. There’s no sense in drawing out something like this. No sense in you desperately begging for any scrap of affection or attention. You had more respect for yourself than that.

You approached the next clearing, and the hair on the back of your neck stood. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Something here was off. You stopped at the edge, one hand palming the knife at your side, and scanned the surrounding treeline.

“Down,” you shouted as a figure moved, your Fae hearing picking up the slight zing of an arrow string pulled taut. They listened, and dove to the ground behind some rocks. With another thought, the ground underneath the attackers shifted, rolling up to knock whoever it was off balance. You dove to the forest floor, arrows still flew, one lodging in your thigh - the other grazing your arm, head knocking against the rocks. Pain shot through your body, sending white spots through your vision - but you gritted your teeth and rolled, righting yourself up to a crouch.

It all happened in seconds. Your right wrist, your dominant wrist, was broken - and you reached for your dagger with your left. You felt Ella’s distinct magic - a shield of wind coming to surround the three of you, and heard the sound of Edde’s bowstring pulling taught, and your own magic acting of its own accord. Sentient, almost. Maybe it was your subconscious guiding it.

The rest passed in a blur, all you knew was fifteen bodies were left by the end of it. Five with arrows through their skulls, others with blue faces - like someone had ripped the air from their lungs, the rest strangled by branches and vines. Looks like the last three had gotten their wits about them and fled. The three of you fought together before, and had spent a magic-less decade together with the Wolf-Tribe. You knew what you were doing. Still, you had gotten lucky. They caught you by surprise.

Edde was scouting the area ahead, Ella looking at your wounds anxiously. Neither of you could heal, none of your magic lent to that.

“It’s fine,” you insisted. It was - surface wounds in all honesty. The biggest risk now was infection. As soon as you got to a healer, you’d be fine. “We can turn back-”

“Going back will add an extra three hours,” Edde said as she entered, a handful of herbs in her hand. She chewed them, before packing them onto the wound on your arm, and ripping part of her shirt. “Crude, but it’ll keep infection away for now.”

“I don’t want to go back.” You winced, trying not to sound like a whining child. If you made it to the next town, someone could easily send a messenger to Orynth with the information. Plus, there were sentries posted there. But … the threat was closer to Orynth, and you did have a moral obligation to inform them of any dangers present. Ella gave you a sympathetic look. You’d given them the run down about the status of your relationship in the beginning of your trip, and they knew you well enough to pick up that you didn’t want to speak about them further.

Edde had a forced grin on her face, “I’m the oldest - and I say we’re going home.”

You appreciated her attempt at humor, and sighed. Neither of them suggested shifting and going ahead - it might have been smart but the three of you were stronger together. Leaving one of them alone with you, injured, would be a risk - having one of you alone would be another risk, and you weren’t taking any of those.

Battered, and bruised, your cousins helped you back to the castle, each of your arms propped over one of their shoulders. Edde had slung you over her shoulder for part of it, but when you sensed her strength waning you insisted on walking. The three of you had worse in the past, you could walk on an injured leg. The pounding in your head was more obnoxious anyway.

Fenrys saw you first. Thankfully. You didn’t want to see Rowan or Aelin yet.

The male told the two of them to stay in place, actually said ‘don’t fucking move,’ and you didn’t argue as he swept you in his arms, mouthing a ‘sorry’ over his shoulder. They both shrugged, sending a knowing glance to each other.

“Is there any chance you won’t tell them?” You mumbled.

“Trouble in paradise?” He teased, his voice strained. You snarled at him, and he snorted. “You know I have to.”

Even if he didn’t have to, he would. He barked an order at a passing sentry, and you kept your mouth clamped shut as he slipped between the folds of the world, your stomach churning.

The poor messenger sent to the Queen and King was shaking. Rowan stiffened. He knew this male to be level headed, calm, and stoic. But here he was - shaking like a leaf, like a soldier after his first blood drawn.

“Y/n,” he started, “is in the healers-”

Aelin shoved him to the side and sprinted out the door. Rowan didn’t wait for him to finish either and took off after her. Their footsteps sprinted down the halls, silent on the stone as they ran faster than they ever had. They cleared through the hallways with ease, hands wrapping around the corners to propel themselves forward.

“We need to stop the bleeding.” One of the healers said, in a firm no-nonsense tone, and you yelped as she began undoing the half-assed bandages, giving an appreciative nod at the herbs. Your eyes shut closed, focusing on anything but the lashing pain coming from your thigh. At least the arrow was lodged well enough that keeping the piece inside stopped any bleeding.

The door flung open. Rowan and Aelin stood there - pure panic and wrath coming from each of them. Rowan eyed both healers, with startling intensity. You fought back the words on the tip of your tongue - to tell them to leave, to get out of there.

“Leave.” Rowan ordered both of the healers instead. You opened your mouth to protest, but he fixed you with a look and you shut it again. Testing him right now - at least in front of the other females, might not be a wise idea.

His predatory attention stayed on you as he made his way across the room. Aelin, however, kept an eye on the women, watching until the door closed firmly behind them, before rushing over to your side.

Rowan managed to stay cool, but Aelin cursed under her breath as she took in your wounds. A broken wrist, a deceptively deep gash on your arm, part of an arrow stuck out of your thigh. You’d cut the rest off to make travel back a bit easier.

“I didn’t think you’d care,” you said bitterly. Rowan ignored you - giving instructions to Aelin instead. Who, surprisingly, listened without questioning - fetching whatever items he ordered.

“Tell me what happened.” He ordered, and you paused, tilting your head. He was focused on your wound, magic starting to swirl over your skin. “Now,” he didn’t look up at you.

You let out a low exhale, but told him what happened, recalling every detail you could.

“Does anything else hurt?” Aelin asked as Rowan finished up.

“No,” you said quietly. Your head did, a bit, from impact - but you didn’t want them to think you’re weak, or complaining. The other ones were more serious, but healed almost as if nothing had happened, only scars in their place. You’d be sore for a few days, but that should be all.

“Let’s get you to bed,” Aelin held out a hand for you. You reached to take it, but Rowan cut in - sweeping you up into his arms instead. You stiffened in his hold, but he only tightened, holding you close to him.

They were both silent on the walk back, not that it mattered - you drifted into sleep almost as soon as your head hit the pillow.

Aedion took in their report with a grim face, before sending out scouts to locate the survivors. Ones who managed to survive the three of you. Your cousins headed back out with them to show the way. He had instructed them to bring them in alive, if possible.

He’d let them rot in the dungeons, let them fester until Aelin and Rowan got their turn. They wouldn’t make it out of there alive, he knew that for certain.

Rowan had tossed and turned all night. Over the last week, he had no idea where you were or when you were coming back. He could’ve reached out to someone in town - one of your other family members, but he didn’t want to look like a fool. Like an idiot who didn’t bother to ask. Like what he was.

Aelin was right that they were busier than usual, and had been for the last few months. But, they had a free day this weekend - and you knew that, but still chose to leave. They’d cleared that night for you, to get back and spend time with you. When they got there - he could hear you packing, and bitter anger started simmering inside of him. He thought you were running away at the first sign of trouble.

First, you said they never had time for you, and when they did have free time - you left. It pissed him off. If he was being objective, he could see where you were coming from. He’d sworn to himself he’d make it up to you, when things calmed down. Gods, you’d moved in - at his and Aelin’s insistence - so they could spend more time together.

You were younger, and hadn’t settled yet. Maybe he was an idiot - still thinking in years and decades while you were thinking in weeks and months. Three months to him was nothing. But … you didn’t have the full grasp on immortality yet.

Regardless, you were back now - and safe. There’s no gods-damned way he’d let you leave that bed anytime soon. Not until you were completely healed and whole. He propped himself up on one arm, Aelin dozed fitfully next to you, one arm slung over your waist, her front pressing into your back, wrapping herself around you like she might shield you from the world. He brushed a few strands from your face, frowning at the small abrasion on your temple. He’d missed that, but it was mostly healed now - just a light pink scratch in its wake.

In the morning, he’d say his apologies when you woke. You needed sleep now.

“Y/n,” Aelin called, brushing her thumb against your cheek. You let out a slow breath, but didn’t open your eyes. Your heartbeat was still strong, breaths still even.

“Let her sleep it off,” Rowan advised, already pulling a shirt over his head. They’d cleared their schedule as much as possible - only one meeting they wouldn’t be able to miss. He’d already arranged for sentries to be posted at their doorway, with orders to let nobody but them, Fenrys, or Aedion through. Two hours, and they’d be right back at your side.

“Are you sure?” She asked, glancing up at the clock. It was nearly eight in the morning, and you’d knocked out around eight last night. In all honesty, if you’d woken up right then she would’ve said fuck it to the meeting. Even though the meeting had been called because of what happened yesterday. Her blood began to boil again. Aedion had assured her they were searching for the ones that had done this to you. And bringing them back - alive. But, given your cousins were on the hunt she couldn’t say what state they would be in. Fae can be especially ruthless where their family was concerned, and the three of you were close.

Aedion stood in the door, partially blocked by Rowan’s figure as she ran a hand over your hair, smoothing through some of the tangled strands. She was surprised you’d even let her help you take a bath. Maybe you were too exhausted to protest. Aelin would’ve preferred for you to yell - to scream, anything besides the quiet silence you’d returned with.

“Edde and Ella are guiding them.” She knew those names - your cousins. “I made them swear to bring them back alive.” Aelin almost laughed that he’d made the two females promise.

“Let me know as soon as they return.” Rowan instructed, and slammed the door in his face.

“That was rude,” she said absentmindedly.

“He can handle it.” Rowan countered, stopping at the edge of the bed. She glanced up at him, but his expression was unreadable. Aelin reached out and squeezed his hand. They were both keeping a thin lid on their anger.

“Yes,” he sighed, dragging her back to the present. “Her body needs rest.”

Aelin pressed her lips to your forehead, running a thumb over your cheek. “We’ll be back soon, love,” she murmured - as if you might hear, and tucked the blankets tightly around you. A thought had a fire roaring in the corner. You needed to stay warm. It was still early autumn, but a chill had set in overnight, the temperatures dipping to just above freezing. Clouds had rolled in overnight, putting an end to the sunny few weeks they had. A wicked storm was brewing outside. Not uncommon for this time of year, but it felt like a bad omen.

Rowan could tell Aelin was forcing herself not to sprint back to the room. They’d made a tentative plan - check on you, then grab a healer to come do a more thorough check. Something they should’ve done last night, but he couldn’t stomach the thought of anyone else near you in that vulnerable state. He’d barely kept his cool with Aedion in the doorway. Only knowledge of your friendship with the male and his blood oath to their Queen kept him from ripping his head off for being too close.

Aelin pushed the door open ahead of him, spotting your form still sleeping on their bed, in the exact position they’d left you in. Something was wrong. You should’ve woken by now - or at least moved. You always tossed and turned in your sleep. But … you had been rather still last night. His pace picked up, overtaking Aelin as he yanked the covers back.

“Y/n.” He called, running a hand down your arm. Cold, your skin was cold. The room is warm - a fire still burning in the corner. Panic rose inside of him - your heart was still beating, breaths still even. He shook your shoulder lightly. He called your name again - louder. Aelin did as well. No response. Nothing.

Aelin had darted for the door, he vaguely heard her shouting something at one of the guards in the hallway, the sound of other footsteps pounding down the hallway, but he couldn’t take his gaze away from you. Your lips, pale and cracked slightly.

“Wake up sweetheart,” he tried keeping his voice gentle this time. Nothing. He shook you again. “Wake up,” his chest tightened, throat constricting.

“Rowan,” Aelin’s voice vaguely registered, and he felt two hands cover his, holding them still. Aelin’s face came into his view, everything else blurred out around it. “Don’t shake her.” A pure command, rolling from his Queen. He didn’t bother masking any of the emotions in his face, he couldn’t - not now.

He called your name again instead, Aelin slowly pushed his hands away from you. They hung limply at his side. His magic had checked over you at least three times and he couldn’t find anything. Why hadn’t he gotten a healer last night? Why weren’t you waking up? He should’ve asked about the cut on your head. Or have woken you up during the night to check on you. How many hours had he spent staring at you?

He let out a low snarl as a healer stood in the doorway, turning to block her view of your body.

“She needs her help,” Aelin said - gentle but firm. Reluctantly, he tore his gaze away from the healer and took a few steps away. The woman wasted no time rushing towards you. Another healer came in behind her. And another. He tensed at all of the new people - all surrounding you. Touching you.

“Rowan.” Aelin snapped, and he met her eyes. “I don’t like it either. She needs help.”

When was the last time Aelin had been the voice of reason? Perhaps she was more in touch with her human side.

“Reign it in or leave,” one of the healers - a female with a no-nonsense tone and stature barked. He pulled his power back in, unaware he’d let it reel from him. His eyes never left you, as he stood with his back to the wall. Centuries of self-control went into keeping himself in place. One wrong move and -

“Rowan,” he heard Aelin snarl. Reluctantly, he tore his gaze away from you to look at her. Keep it together. They’re helping.

He took a few deep breaths.

“We need water and clean towels.” The healer in charge announced. One of the younger ones went to move, but she held up a hand and sent a knowing glance to Aelin. Rowan had been a live fuse next to her.

“Rowan, go get them.” She gave the order, but not pulling on the bond. She’d already had to do that once, to get him to stop trying to shake you awake. His eyes narrowed at her, but he listened. He needed something to keep himself from murdering everything within a foot of you. A basic command, to make him feel useful - to serve in the way Fae males needed.

She did wonder how she was the reasonable one in this situation. Not that she was feeling very reasonable. One threatening move from the healers … and she wouldn’t be responsible for what happened to them. The three of them were very aware of how on edge the two were. The one in charge was Fae, the other two humans - and seemed to be taking cues from her. Only focusing on reigning in Rowan kept her from losing her calm.

This kind of fear … only when she’d almost lost Rowan those years ago - when he took the arrow for her, had she felt something similar to this. That’s when she realized he was her… Gods.

No, no, no, a voice inside of her head screamed at her as she dropped to her knees, fingers digging into the carpet. Why now? When she was … The healers hadn’t turned to look at her. Nobody could see the war or anguish in her mind. Rowan returned, abruptly shoving the water and towels into one of their arms before he was at her side, arm wrapped over her shoulders.

“I know fireheart,” he murmured. He doesn’t. He doesn’t know. A hand gripped her chin, and dark green iris’s met her own. “It’ll be fine,” he said with such conviction she believed wholeheartedly. It had to be. She wouldn’t accept any other alternative.

You were in a murky fog, voices blurring over, shapes coming in and out of your vision. You spun in a circle - but it was all consuming. Was this your mind? Had it been scrambled somehow? Last you remembered, you were being tucked into bed by … you couldn’t put a finger on who. Then darkness. A sleep so heavy it pulled you under within seconds.

Turquoise eyes ringed in gold. You focused on them, trying to pull yourself out of this abyss - towards the colors you recognized so easily. Who did they belong to? You couldn’t remember. The fog covered them again. Gone. You deflated. Would they come back?

Fenrys frowned from the doorway. Rowan was pacing, the carpet looked worn where he walked back and forth. Everyone was on edge in the castle. In Orynth really. The scouting party sent word earlier that they’d arrive with the three remaining combatants tomorrow. When he told Rowan - a steely glint he recognized came over the male's eyes. He couldn’t find it in himself to feel bad for them, they’d deserve everything coming their way - and more. They knew who they were attacking. It wasn’t a secret you were Rowan and Aelins partner.

In all honesty, he’s surprised those were the only injuries the three of you sustained. Well, you were the only injured party. Eighteen against three. For humans, the odds would seem astronomical - and likely whoever it was had underestimated the fact that they were going up against well trained Fae warriors. Given how sweet and innocent you look, they probably thought you were an easy target. But, you’d seen the thick of the fighting in Orynth and survived ten years in Erilea with the Wolf-Tribe.

The healers had given you ten days. Ten days before they feared there might be some kind of irreparable brain damage.

More than anything, he wanted for you to wake - to be healthy and whole. Mainly because you were his friend. But, based on his conversation with Aelin the other night … there was more at stake. Once she told him, he realized the blood oath tugged a different kind of loyalty towards you as well.

“Fenrys,” he heard her. He was still in Wolf form by their door, standing guard. Something he did without having to be asked. He blinked three times, using the old code from years ago; ‘are you alright?’

Two blinks, ‘no.’ She pressed her back against the wall, glancing up and down the corridor, before slowly lowering herself to the ground. He hadn’t seen his Queen look this lost in years. She had something to say - something she needed to, and he patiently waited for her to speak.

“I hadn’t felt like this since Rowan took the arrow for me, and that’s when I realized …” Her head fell into her palms. He knew exactly what she meant. Fenrys shifted into human form, taking a seat beside her. “Is it even possible? Is this some sort of cruel joke? Is this my punishment?”

She was bearing her heart, throwing it out on a platter.

“It’s possible.” He answered her first question. The others, he didn’t know how to respond but … he tried. “Having a mate is never a punishment.”

“But .. Rowan.” He could hear the question; ‘is Rowan hers too?’

He leaned his head back against the wall, kicking his legs out in front of him. “Based on his … behavior. I’d be surprised if she wasn’t.”

“Isn’t this typical for Fae?”

The protectiveness, the desire to protect those they consider theirs, when they’re protective and vulnerable. But, he’s known Rowan for decades, and he’s only ever acted this way with Aelin. “It is, but he’s acting the same way he does with you.”

Tension left her body in a giant wave. “What do I do? Do you think he knows?”

Fenrys stilled. Whitethorn would know - he’d at least have a vague idea. He settled on, “he probably knows.”

Aelin looked at him, waiting for him to answer her first question. “When have you ever let anyone tell you what to do?” He teased her. She rolled her eyes, and he could’ve cheered at the normal gesture. Something besides misery and pain.

“I was asking for advice, asshole.”

Fenrys forced himself to focus back on the present. The healer looked like she was about at his limits with Rowan. She shot Fenrys a pleading glance. He really did admire her patience.

“I’ll stay with her.” He heard Aedion from behind him. Backup, that was good. Rowan turned slowly, eyeing both of them with a predator's glance. Finally, he nodded at Aedion - giving his permission. If you were awake to see this, you’d probably rip him a new one. Giving permission for anyone else to be around you. If - when, you woke, you’d be in for a whole different world of territorial nonsense.

Fenrys decided to take some initiative, and taunted Rowan. “You’re getting rusty, cooped up in here,” and shot him a shit-eating grin he knew would provoke a reaction. Sure enough, Rowan stormed out the door, jerking his chin for him to follow. Aedion shot him a sympathetic glance, and he elbowed the male harshly in the ribs. Although he told Aelin her husband probably knows, he’s not going to be the one to bring it up to him. That’s a journey they’ll have to take for themselves. For now, he’ll do his best to taunt some of the rage out of him - maybe make him more tolerable for the rest of them to be around.

One thing Fenrys knows he’s good at, the best at, is pissing his royal Highness off.

“Just come back.” A male said to you. The fog cleared slightly, and a blurry face peered down at you. A male with turquoise and gold eyes. Everything else blurred in and out, but the colors stayed. You could nearly feel the pain inside of them. “I know you’re mad at them, but they love you. They’ve been losing their minds, we all have.” You can’t remember who you’re mad at, or why.

“Edde and Ella are hunting them down. They’ll be back tomorrow.”

The names sparked something in you. A vague splinter of memory you tried to hold on to. Like water, it slipped through your fingers. You tried to speak - to scream, but your voice disappeared in the fog. The eyes withdrew from your view.

“Can she hear anything?” Aelin asked - her voice still tight.

“We don’t know.” The healer dismissed herself.

She was tired of hearing that. We don’t know. We’re not certain. We can’t tell.

Day seven. Three more days, the healers had given you three more days until they feared the damage was irreparable.

But … they didn’t know how strong you were, not like she did. You’d survived ten years in hiding - you’d survived that last battle, the ambush - three against eighteen, survived dealing with her and Rowan’s bullshit. She refused to accept this kind of ending, refused to lose her mate - even if you didn’t know it yet.

She imagined all of the concerns you might have, and all of the ways she would tell you you’re wrong. When you woke, she wondered if the bond would snap for you immediately. Probably not. She hasn’t found a good chance to approach Rowan about it - but she thinks he knows. And that he’s aware she does. Very little gets by him. She told Fenrys because she had to speak to someone, but saying it to Rowan felt too real.

Aelin wouldn’t lose you. But knowing and having loved you, no matter how shitty she was at it, was better than never knowing you at all.

She squeezed your hand. “Come back,” she pleaded, “please.”

Her thumb gently traced your cheekbone. Cold. Over her shoulder, the fire was still going strong. There’s so many blankets surrounding you, she feared you might suffocate if she added another. Neither she or Rowan had slept well in the last week. They slept in shifts, always wanting one of them to be awake in case anything changed - in case you woke. The others ran the castle, letting the two of them get away with making an occasional appearance.

They’d somehow managed to keep what happened underwraps. And they would - until they got their answers. Tomorrow, their new guests would arrive. Along with the rest of her court. She hated that she’d have to divide her attention away from you - to share her attention with anyone else.

The ever changing scent hit the door, followed by a gentle knock. She tore her attention away from you, heavy legs carrying her to the door.

Lysandra knew better than to try and come in without invitation. Even though the shifter was one of her closest friends, she still battled against her instincts to tell her to go the fuck away.

Worry was evident all over the shifter’s face as she glanced at your form, surrounded by a mountain of pillows and blankets. Aelin couldn’t stop the small snarl beginning in her throat. Too long. She was looking too long. Quickly, Lysandra drew her attention back to her, and she shot her an apologetic grimace.

“Any change?”

Aelin shook her head, tears building in the corners of her eyes. She let Lysandra take her in her arms, hold her close and tight.

“She’ll come back.” She didn’t sound too convinced. Aelin abruptly pulled back.

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it,” she snapped, and then winced, opening her mouth again.

“You don’t need to apologize.” Lysandra said quickly.

“No. I’m being unreasonable.” Aelin ran her hands down her face, looking back at you. She could still hear your heartbeat. Strong. Lysandra’s eyes dug into her. Her friend was always too perceptive. “Don’t say it,” she pleaded without looking at her. Of course she knows.

“Is he…”

“I think so,” Aelin interrupted her before she could say the actual word. Mate. Even thinking it brought pain - launching right through her chest, ripping it in half. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Alright.” Lys’s tone said she very much believes she should talk about it. She’d tell her exactly where she could shove her beliefs if she pushed any further. “You need to go beat the shit out of someone.” Her friend said instead.

Aelin slowly turned her head over her shoulder, raising one brow, “are you volunteering?”

“I’ll find you a volunteer,” she winked at her, before heading out the door.

“Get Aedion,” she shouted after her.

Aelin flexed her hands. Maybe getting out some of the rage would be good. Fenrys and her cousin had alternated taking the brunt of her and Rowan’s pent up frustration and rage. She highly suspected they didn’t trust anyone else to take them on and survive the encounter. She looked back through the open doorway. You’d come back, she knew it.

“It’s been ten days.” You heard a voice. Ten days, you’d heard that over and over again and knew it related to you.

You had ten days to ‘come back,’ you’d figured out that’s what you needed to do.

“Tell me how,” you’d screamed into nothingness. “I want to, help me” But you were lost, wandering around in this blurry half-reality. Voices and faces came in and out, words coming in fragments, sometimes in sentences, but nothing concrete.

“We’ve done everything we can. It’s time to consider if…”

Cries and screams; you’re wrong, she’ll come back, get the fuck out. Doors slammed.

Two faces swarmed above you, clearer than before. Turquoise ringed with gold. Green. A name. They kept repeating a name over and over again.

“Please, love,” a feminine pleaded.

“We need you,” the male one added.

“Help me,” you begged, “help me. help me. help me.”

Twelve days. The healers were still working with you - keeping your muscles from atrophying, pushing nutrient dense tonics down your throat, checking your vitals, using magic to test for other things.

Brain activity, you still had that - but they couldn’t tell how much. Or how much of you would be left when you returned.

The head healer sat down next to her, catching her attention.

“What?” Aelin tried to keep her voice gentle, but had a feeling she failed miserably. To her credit, the woman didn’t look ruffled.

“The only way she’ll come back now is if she wants to. She needs a reason to return, your Majesty.”

The woman left before Aelin could ask any more questions.

“The only way she’ll come back now is if she wants to. She needs a reason to return.”

You wanted it, now you needed to find a reason. You paced, or at least you thought you did, in this mental prison.

Isn’t wanting it reason enough? There’s something to return to. Names fluttered through your mind. You’d repeated them to yourself over and over again, unwilling to let them go.

Edde. Ella. Fenrys. Aedion. Aelin. Rowan.

The last two felt the strongest. You didn’t know who they were, but knew they needed you. If you disappeared completely, it would hurt them. Would hurt all of them.

You glanced down at your arms, spotting the fresh white scar slashing one of them, and another smaller scar on your thigh. Others littered your body in various places. You’ve fought before, but not like this. Pitting your mind and will against whatever abyss this is.

If it’s an abyss … maybe you need to build a ladder to climb out. You imagined strands of turquoise, gold, and green swirling in front of you, forming a link. As you reached out, they disappeared on touch. Frustration wouldn’t help you now. You would do this. You wouldn’t accept any other option.

Fenrys leaned back against the wall in the dungeon, watching Rowan work before him. Lorcan stood to his left. He wasn’t surprised the male had shown up. He wouldn’t let Elide go anywhere alone, not since there’d just been an attack. Or in general. He wasn’t phased by anything Rowan was doing before them. Or what Aelin had done earlier.

They’d gotten their answers days ago, now it was vengeance.

“She’s their mate.” Lorcan said under his breath, so only he could hear. Not a question. Fenrys didn’t comment. Rowan was enacting the kind of wrath only a mated male could. The three males had already begged for death, several times. He didn’t feel pity, or any inclination towards mercy, but if he did he wouldn’t dare interrupt. Only a fool would.

Part of him wondered if Rowan was making up for time he didn’t get to spend with Cairn. He wasn’t stupid enough to ask the question. Besides the attack on you, they’d learned several other vital bits of information from the males. At first, they’d made the mistake of bragging. Of what they planned to do to you - speaking to each other. Others might’ve called it stupid to keep them together, but the demi-Fae guards posted could hear every one of their ‘whispers,’ and the things they’d reported made him sick and furious.

They were on day thirteen. The healers said ten. Rowan and Aelin wouldn’t give up. Others had started thinking in if’s, but they refused.

Lorcan nudged him, jerking his chin towards the door. He took one more glance at Rowan, still occupied, and followed.

“What is it?” He crossed his arms as they left earshot. Lorcan had a … look on his face. Strange, considering the bastard usually never showed any kind of emotion. Worried? He wasn’t particularly close to you, and had only met you on a few occasions.

“Do you think she’ll wake?”

“Yes.” He replied instantly. “There’s no other option.”

Lorcan let out a slow breath. “If they lose her …”

“I know.”

They might lose their Queen and King too. Everyone had thought of it, even if nobody dared to voice it.

It wasn’t improving as quickly as you’d hoped it would. But - you could feel it. It was a physical thing, living and sentient almost. You let your fingers run over one of them, colors swirled together and shined. It was warm to the touch, and slid easily over your fingertips. You wrapped your hand around it, and it held firm. You reached for the next. It held.

With the next one, you brought your hand up, your foot settling into the bottom ledge. It was working. You refocused your breaths and tilted your chin up. Endless mist covered your vision, only seeing where your hand landed next.

Trust, you needed to trust that you could pull yourself out. Trust someone would be there to catch you.

Aelin knew she was sleep-deprived, and figured the rustling from the room was a hallucination. She’d heard it several times while slipping out the door, only to rush back in and find you in the same position.

Day twenty. Twenty days of hell, of waiting. There wasn’t anything she could fix, she could only hope and trust you were doing what you could. Gods, she spoke to you as much as she could. Aelin read books, talked about everything and nothing in hopes you would hear. There was only one subject she’d refused to approach, refused to speak aloud. Would that be the key? Could that be the reason you needed? The one that the healer had mentioned. She hadn’t told Rowan about the conversation … she swallowed harshly, and pulled her husband aside. Maybe now was the time to do it.

Rowan read the look in her eyes and kicked everyone out of the room.

“The healer told me that it’s … that she needs …”

“She told me too,” Rowan interrupted her rambling. He gave her a tight smile, and pulled her into his chest. His chin rested on top of her head, and she leaned in to hear her heartbeat. “Are we going to acknowledge it?”

She leaned her head back enough to meet his eyes, and took a breath before she said the thing haunting her mind for the last twenty days. “That we have another mate?”

Rowan nodded. She could see the relief flooding over his features, and imagined the same was showing on hers. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “This doesn’t mean I love you any less.”

“I know.” She huffed out a laugh. You had two mates waiting for you, when you get back. Two who will burn the entire world down to get you back here if they had to. “We’ll get our mate back.”

Mate. You blinked as you heard the word. So soft you almost missed it. Aelin and Rowan.

You reached another hand, and could see the next ring, and the next. The world cleared around you.

Soft cloth and fur covered you, you twitched your fingers - you could feel it. It was real. It had to be.

Your eyes opened, and you shut them quickly. Too bright.

A few seconds later, you squinted and slowly let yourself adjust.

Gods, how many blankets did one person need? Your entire body was heavy and slow, but you managed to wiggle out from under the cloth mountain, making it to the edge of the bed. Had you been alone this entire time? Had you imagined Aelin and Rowan?

Maybe a stranger had found you and brought you back. But … the room was familiar. Maybe this was another dream, a new reality your mind trapped you in.

You let your feet hit the soft carpeted floor, pressing yourself up to stand. You felt surprisingly steady and took a few tentative steps.

It was sunny outside. Gods, you needed to feel the sun on your skin - even if it’s fake, even if this isn’t real.

Your hand gripped the doorknob, slowly opening the door to the balcony. A chilly wind hit you and you wrapped your arms tightly around yourself, ignoring the cold biting at your toes and skin as you took a step out. Based on the sun, it’s about mid morning - at least in this dream world. You wandered towards the railing, letting your hands travel over the wood - worn with time but still strong.

Orynth, you recognized the city. Maybe this could be real. But if it was real … wouldn’t Aelin or Rowan be here? Or had they just shoved you in here out of obligation. Maybe the word mate was a figment of your imagination as well. Your mind telling you what you want to hear. Footsteps filled your ears and you whirled around, bracing your hands on the railing behind you.

Rowan stilled. He could’ve sworn he heard a door open. But … lately his mind had been playing tricks on him. Him and Aelin both. He pressed a kiss to the top of Aelin’s head. Now that they’d actually said it out loud, it felt like there was a lot more to lose.

Twenty days. There wasn’t any change - but at least there wasn’t any deterioration. He wouldn’t give up hope on you, he couldn’t. Gods, he couldn’t lose you. Fuck.

He took a step back, running a hand over his face. They’d been out of the room for maybe ten minutes, but he still felt like he needed to have eyes on you at all times, lest he miss something. Even if it’s just a twitch of your fingers. Rowan would give anything for that - for any kind of movement. Your eyes had twitched behind your eyelids at some points, and he knew you were dreaming or seeing something. It gave him hope.

“Let’s go back in,” he murmured, and Aelin led the way back towards the door. She cracked it open and froze, breaths coming heavier, before she shoved it back open, turning to him with pure alarm on her face. He pushed past her.

Gone. The bed was empty. Impossible. Nobody could get in here - they’d been right there. Right outside.

The balcony door was cracked open. Aelin spotted it a second before him, and he’d never seen her move faster. He was right on her heels. Pure terror and dread filled him. Has someone taken you? They could cover a lot of ground in ten minutes. Why the hell had he left you alone?

He barely stopped himself from crashing into Aelin.

You were there. Hands braced against the wood railing, eyes wide in confusion. Awake and standing. Your brows furrowed as you saw them, shoulders tightening.

“Not real,” you murmured to yourself. His heart dropped to his stomach. You looked vaguely like a cornered kitten. They would have to be very careful, considering how close you are to the ledge. Subtly, he let a shield of wind surround them, one that would push you back if you somehow fell past over the edge.

“It’s real,” Aelin whispered, taking a few steps towards you. He fought the urge to rush over there and grab you, to tug you away from danger. You panicked and confused. He should’ve been there when you woke, to see your pretty eyes open again. To tell you how much you mean to him. How he’s thought about you every second. How he never should’ve let you leave on those terms.

You didn’t move towards them, but didn’t try and make more space, and Aelin took that as a good thing. She slowly walked towards you, and he followed a few steps behind.

Aelin stopped a few feet away, and held out her hand.

Ten seconds passed.

Your gaze switched between her hand, Aelin’s face, his. He held his breath.

Ten more seconds.

You took her hand with a cautious smile and tentative hope on your features.

“It’s real,” he repeated Aelin’s words from earlier. He watched your fingers squeeze, and you took another step forwards, closer. Aelin’s other hand came up, brushing against your cheek. Rowan watched as you melted into her touch, eyes closing as you let out a little sigh.

His knees hit the floor, tears openly streaming down his face.

#rowaelin x reader #poly!rowaelin x reader #rowaelin x y/n #poly!rowaelin x y/n #rowan whitethorn x y/n #rowan whitethorn x reader #aelin galathynius x y/n #aelin galathynius x reader #throne of glass fic #throne of glass x reader

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borathae · 3 months

Text

↳ Index [Chapter 08 - Lake]

Warnings: good days and good feels and people being happy <3, emotional conversations by a bonfire, this is pure comfort, ah yes there is also skinny dipping by the lake, and a cute picnic date <3

Wordcount: 10k

a/n: now this is the end :( thank you so much for coming on this journey with me, i hope that you guys could find comfort and healing in this story and here to so many more stories about this universe 💙

Taehyung startles awake, meeting Yoongi’s eyes. The latter is standing over him, staring at the peculiar scene with scrunched brows.

“Hyung”, Taehyung clears his sleepy throat and sits up, “what are you doing here?”

They are whispering.

“Just checking if any of you are awake. How did you manage to share this small bed?”

Taehyung looks to his side where you and Jungkook are cuddled together. Jungkook has both his arms wrapped around you. You have your chin against his chest which results in your neck to be bent into a weird position and for your mouth to be agape. Jungkook sleeps with his chin almost swallowed in your mouth and his own lips widely agape.

“These two seem completely gone”, Taehyung stifles a laugh.

“Yeah, doesn’t look comfortable at all.”

“Agreed. Come, let us let them sleep”, Taehyung says and rolls out of bed. He makes sure to tug you and Jungkook back in and leaves the room with Yoongi.

“You look better.”

“I do? What do you mean?”

Yoongi points at Taehyung’s ankle.

“You’re not in pain anymore.”

“I am? Oh! I am!” Taehyung widens his eyes in joyful realization, “oh this is remarkable. I can walk again.”

“Mhm good. You guys were reckless yesterday.”

Taehyung clicks his tongue, “why can’t you merely be happy for me once? Why must you always turn everything into a lecture?” he is teasing, which makes Yoongi laugh.

“It’s the age, I can’t help it.”

He jogs down the stairs in a light step. Taehyung does the same.

“Good morning”, your grandmother greets them. She is knitting, sitting on the window seat with a mug of tea by her side.

“Good morning, Agatha. Did you sleep well?”

“I did, thank you for asking, Yoongi dear. And you?”

“Like a baby.”

Your grandma scans her eyes over Taehyung’s ankle.

“How are you doing today, Taehyung dear? ___ told me that you and Jungkook had a little accident yesterday. We were worried.”

“We stupidly jumped down the hayloft.”

“You did? Oh my, oh my”, she gasps, throwing her hand over her mouth.

“Indeed. Jungkook jumped first and I followed in blind worry. Truly, you must know that in the real world we could jump down buildings without hurting ourselves.”

“Oh my, oh my. It was instinct then.”

“Indeed it was and we paid the price. Silly us.”

“But you’re okay again?”

“I am. It feels as if nothing ever happened. Yoongi’s spell truly helped. As did whatever was in the porridge yesterday. I thank you for making it. It was truly remarkable.”

Your grandmother smiles mischievously, “that’s good to hear.”

“What did you put in it for it to taste so healing?”

“Magic, my dear. Just a little bit of magic.”

“I see. Well, it was truly wonderful. Thank you. Like this, I can enjoy our last day here.”

“Is it already the last day? Oh my, time flies by too quickly”, she says and looks back at her knitting, “what a shame, I got so used to having you here with us.”

“We will definitely come back many more times”, Taehyung promises.

“Good, oh that is very good to hear”, she snickers mischievously, “I will have to beat you at Schnaps one day.”

Taehyung laughs, “then I must tell you that I will not lose without a fight.”

She laughs, “good. I wouldn’t want an easy fight either way.”

They exchange a mischievous look with each other and then Taehyung turns his attention to Yoongi instead. The latter is busy making coffee and tea.

Taehyung comes up behind him to hug his middle, resting his chin on his shoulder. The melody once leaving Yoongi’s lips, gets stuck in his throat, his body tenses up.

“What are you doing?”

“Friendship hug. I have a lot of catching up to do now that we are friends.”

“Does it have to be hugs? Can’t it be a handshake or a friendly nod?”

“No. No, it has to be hugs”, Taehyung says and gives Yoongi a little squeeze.

“You’re so weird”, Yoongi murmurs, but gives Taehyung’s hand an awkward pet. Just twice then he already pulls back, “okay enough. It’s getting uncomfortable.”

“You held out longer than I imagined”, Taehyung says and steps back, “you are very huggable, hyung.”

“This feels like a curse when you say it”, he jokes and follows it up with a gentle nudge to Taehyung’s chin and a fond, “brat.”

Then he turns his attention back to the coffee. Taehyung smiles, feeling flutters in his chest.

“Have you thought about our plan more?”

“What plan?” Yoongi asks.

“The plan to find your friends.”

“Ah”, Yoongi says and shakes his head, “not yet. I need time.”

“I understand. Well, if you need company on your endeavours, you can always count on me.”

“Thank you, Tae. I appreciate it.”

The eye contact is fleeting because Yoongi is shy. He clears his throat, scratching the side of his neck.

“Uhm”, he begins and clears his throat again, “carry the tea.”

He walks off with two mugs of coffee and Taehyung is left alone with two mugs of tea. He takes them and follows Yoongi upstairs.

“What are we going to do with them?”

“Wake the others. It’s the last day here, they should spend it well, not sleep till noon.”

“Yes. I agree. Oh hyung, I am very excited. We could take a walk in the forest or make music together.”

“Mhm, sounds nice.”

Yoongi uses his elbow to open the bedroom door.

“Wake up you two”, he says as he carries the coffee to the bedside table. He places the mugs on it then gives you and Jungkook a little shake, “wake up.”

Jungkook wakes first, flinching aggressively which in return wakes you. You whine, rolling to your other side so you could bury your face in the pillow. Jungkook grumbles quietly and hides away in the pillow instantly to continue sleeping.

“No snoozing, wake up”, Yoongi tells you in a soft voice and his fingers tracing your hairline. He is smiling fondly, thinking to himself that you look especially beautiful in the morning.

“Go away”, you mumble into the pillow.

He laughs and bends down to kiss your temple, “I’m not leaving.”

“I was dreaming so well, you’re so mean.”

“And you’re missing out on a nice day. Wake up”, he kisses your cheek then straightens up to reach over you to Jungkook. He shakes him gently, cradling his cheek afterwards, “you too, Kookie. Wake up.”

“Five more minutes”, he lulls.

“You two”, Yoongi laughs and steps back, “you’re gonna miss the entire day.”

“Listen to him”, Taehyung says and throws himself over you and Jungkook. He rolls around on top of you, earning himself loud whines, “wake up or I will tickle you.”

“Tae please”, you whine.

“Get off”, Jungkook whines.

“No”, Taehyung says and pinches his side.

Jungkook squeaks and sits up instantly, hitting his hand away.

“It’s not cool, don’t do that”, he whines with a pout.

“But it managed to wake you”, Taehyung says and pinches your side next.

“Tae”, you squeak and writhe away, “don’t do that.”

“Wake up, darling”, Taehyung coos and tickles you again.

“God, you’re so annoying”, you laugh, swiping his hands away as you roll onto your back.

Taehyung laughs and leans down to kiss your cheek. His hands are still on your waist.

“Are you going to fall back to sleep?”

“No god, just don’t tickle me again.”

Taehyung gets off bed, grinning at Yoongi.

“Mission accomplished.”

Yoongi snorts in amusement, “you definitely did. Coffee and tea are on the bedside table. Come down once you’re ready. We’re making breakfast.”

“Oh brekkie”, Jungkook coos with sparkling eyes.

“Mhm, we’re gonna eat it by the lake”, Yoongi says and leaves the room.

“Oh my god, picnic”, you gush, sitting up in excitement.

“Mhm, come on Tae we have lots to do.”

“Do you truly trust me with the kitchen, hyung?” he is teasing, bumping his shoulder with Yoongi as a snicker leaves him.

“No, but I’ll make sure you don’t burn the whole house down”, Yoongi throws back jokingly, making Taehyung laugh and then hug his arm.

The door falls closed behind them. Only you and Jungkook are left. You exchange a look with him. His hair is messy, the pillow is still marked onto his face in red streaks. He meets your eyes and grins sleepily, leaning in to kiss your lips before moving past you to get the coffee.

He sips on it, turning his back to you so he could sit by the window and look outside.

You take the mug of tea, then climb onto his lap. He wraps his arm around you, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Did you sleep well?” he asks.

“Mhm yeah. My neck’s killing me though. What did I do?”

“Don’t know”, Jungkook kisses your neck as he talks, “probably slept weird.”

“Mhm probably”, you say and take a sip of the tea, “mhm Yoongi definitely made this.”

“Yeah, the coffee too. It tastes Yoongi made.”

“Mhm.”

Jungkook rests his chin on your shoulder again, travelling his hand up and down your waist mindlessly.

“Did you sleep well too?” you ask him.

“Mh-hm so well”, he says, “I didn’t even notice that the bed’s so small.”

“Yeah, it’s probably magical because I also had enough space.”

“Magical. Mhm that could be it”, he says and gives you a soft squeeze, “can’t we just stay like this forever? You’re so comfy on my lap.”

You giggle, snuggling closer into him, “I wouldn’t mind. You’re very comfy too.”

“My knees don’t hurt anymore, by the way.”

“They don’t?” you turn in his lap, “Kookie this is amazing. So the magic worked?”

“I think it did. Look”, he lifts you off his lap and hands you his mug so he can lie on his back and kick his feet into the air, “I can do this and it doesn’t hurt.”

“I’m so happy. I was so worried.”

“You did really well”, Jungkook sits up and kisses your cheek, “you’re so cool.”

“Yoongi did most of the work.”

“Yeah, well you helped so this makes you just as cool”, he says with a cute smile.

“Thank you, oh god”, you mumble, feeling shy.

He kisses your cheek, then sits back to sip on his coffee, letting his eyes race over your features.

“What?” you ask him shyly.

“I like looking at you”, he smiles softly, “you’re so beautiful.”

“Oh god”, you instinctively reach up to fix your hair, “I just woke up though.”

“And? I woke up too and do you think I’m ugly?”

“Of course not.”

“You’re not ugly either.”

“Gah Jungkook, stop it”, you gasp and nudge his chest, having to giggle, “you’re so sweet.”

“Heh, you too”, he says and kisses your cheek.

You wash your face and brush your teeth while Jungkook showers. Once he is done, you are already finished, having left the bathroom to get dressed and leave for downstairs.

Yoongi and Taehyung are in the kitchen. They have the radio running. Taehyung sits by the dining table, slicing fruits while Yoongi is in the midst of filling up containers with breakfast.

“This already smells amazing.”

They turn their heads in synch, looking at you.

“My darling, you are finally here.”

“I am”, you greet him with a kiss, “how is your ankle?”

“It is as good as new. Look, I can move it without pain.”

“That’s so good to hear. Gosh darling you, I was worried yesterday”, you say, ruffling his hair.

Taehyung grins and looks back at the fruits.

“And you”, you walk to Yoongi, hugging him from the back, “how are you doing, my love?”

“Good. I made breakfast and your grandmother made bread which we can take.”

“Gosh, I’m so happy. Where are they anyways?”

“In town again. Deborah needed that favour today.”

Deborah was one of your grandmother’s friends. Last night, your grandmother told you that she met her friend in town and that she needed help with fixing the lightning and that it could happen that they needed to leave for town today.

“I see. Gosh, now I’m sad. It’s our last day here and we can’t see them.”

“They promised to be back before dinner.”

“Good. Yeah. I think I would have cried if we had to leave before saying goodbye to them”, you say and look around the counter, “can I help you with something?”

“No, I’m almost done.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I can manage”, Yoongi assures you and leaves the hug so he can store the finished breakfast in baskets.

Now without a task and with Yoongi very obviously busy, you sit down next to Taehyung.

“Can I at least help you with something?”

“No, thank you. I am almost finished.”

“It seems that I’m really useless here”, you joke.

“Not useless. We simply enjoy spoiling you”, Taehyung says with a kiss to your cheek.

“Gosh, you guys are all so sweet.”

“Mhm this already smells amazing”, Jungkook comes downstairs, dressed in a modern hanbok and with his long hair in a ponytail.

“You look very handsome”, Taehyung says, gazing at him.

“Thank you. It’s a modern hanbok, I thought I’d save it up for the last day”, Jungkook says, posing for all of you.

“It’s very pretty”, you say.

“It fits you”, Yoongi says.

“You are so handsome, truly”, Taehyung says.

Jungkook smiles, then looks around the cottage.

“Are your grandparents outside?”

“No, they’re in town again.”

“Ah. Sad, I would have loved to see them again before we leave.”

“They’ll be back by dinner”, Yoongi assures him and shoulders one of the baskets, “take the second basket, we’re leaving.”

“Okay, hyungie.”

Taehyung takes the third basket and you are tasked with carrying the fabrics bag. Like this and with good mood all around you, you make your way to the lake. The song of birds and the buzzing of insects accompanies you just like every day and the scent of the forest is especially nice today.

The spot, where you and Yoongi had the picnic last time, is already under the shade of the tree. You like that it is because the sun is very hot today. You and Taehyung lay out the blanket and pillows, while Jungkook and Yoongi lay out the food afterwards. It is also important to mention that Taehyung excused himself for a moment and disappeared into the forest. None of you knew what he was planning to do, but you suggested that perhaps he just needed to relieve himself.

You sit down in a circle, leaving a space for Taehyung between you and Jungkook. Yoongi sits opposite of the empty space, pouring lemonade into four cups.

“You can already start”, he tells you, not looking up.

“Shouldn’t we wait for Tae to come back?”

“We should. Where is he anyways? It’s been ten minutes.”

“Maybe he went back to the house because he needed to poop.”

“That could be it, yeah.”

“When I first met you and you ran away from me, I thought that maybe you really needed to poop.”

Jungkook laughs, while Yoongi glances at you awkwardly.

“You did?”

“I did, yeah.”

“Oh god, this is bad. Now I’m embarrassed”, Jungkook snickers.

“I know better these days”, you joke.

“You guys are weird”, Yoongi murmurs, handing out the cups.

“Hey, I didn’t know that you guys don’t have these urges back then”, you defend yourself, making Jungkook chuckle and Yoongi glance at you.

“Okay, if you say so”, he says dryly and looks up, “where were you?”

You and Jungkook look at the path. Taehyung is walking back to you with his hands behind his back.

“I got something for the picnic”, he says and sits down on the empty space. He pulls his hands from behind his back, revealing a bouquet of forest flowers.

“Tada!”

“Wow Tae, this is so pretty”, you gasp.

“I plucked them myself. We passed a very big field of flowers when we walked here, so I went back to get some. Do you like them? I thought that perhaps they could add beauty to the picnic.”

“We love them. They’re so pretty. Thank you for plucking them”, you say, pecking his cheek.

“They’re really pretty. Wow, you must have worked so hard”, Jungkook praises him.

“Thanks Tae, you can put them in here”, Yoongi says and fills a fifth cup with water.

Taehyung smiles at all of you with flushed cheeks. You each compliment the flowers one more time and then finally begin with the breakfast. It is useless to say that the breakfast is the best breakfast you have ever tasted. Yoongi’s food has this effect. It is prepared well and it is prepared with love – not only for the food itself but also for the people he makes it for – and one can truly taste it in every bite.

Some time passes where nothing truly significant happens, except that the food gets less and less and your tummies get fuller and fuller. You talk about things just as insignificant and it was so perfectly good this way.

You have reached the sweet part of the breakfast, snacking on the fruits Taehyung sliced when Jungkook lets his eyes run over the wood cutting spot.

“Is this were you cut wood last time, hyungie?”

Yoongi glances at it for a moment, then nods his head.

“Yeah.”

“Nice, that’s cool”, he looks at the lake, “does anyone wanna take a swim later?”

“Definitely”, you say.

“Me too”, Taehyung agrees, “would it bother you if I painted for a while however? The sunlight looks so beautiful right now.”

“Of course not. I could paint something as well”, Jungkook agrees.

And so it happens that the day of insignificant happenings continues after breakfast. Taehyung and Jungkook paint, while you and Yoongi loose yourselves in books. You read and he writes. Truly there is no day more insignificant than this day and that is exactly what makes it so perfect to all of you. It is peaceful, sunny and nice. God knows, you haven’t had such days in a very long time. Knowing that nothing will happen may seem boring to others, but not to your family. Because as long as the most exciting thing of your day is painting and books, it means that the world is at peace and your family is safe.

Jungkook places his pen aside when his drawing is halfway done. He rolls his neck and shoulders, letting out the kind of sound a person makes when they stretch their rusty bodies. Taehyung looks up from the painting.

“Do you want to swim?” he asks him.

“Just taking a short break. I sat in the same position for too long”, he stretches his arms high above his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he groans, “how do humans do that? Aren’t you in constant pain?”

“Are you okay?” you ask him in a chuckle. You are resting with your head on Yoongi’s tummy while the latter uses the basket as a back rest.

“Yeah, just really stiff”, he says mid-stretch. Then he drops his arms again, smacking his lips, “ah, that was nice. What are you painting?” he asks, getting on all fours so he could glance at Taehyung’s painting, “damn, the detail.”

“Do you like it? I find these flowers so beautiful that I needed to paint them.”

“It’s really pretty. Do you wanna see what I drew?”

“I do.”

Jungkook flips his sketchbook. He captured the current moment in black ink. Taehyung with a concentrated pout painting the flowers, Yoongi with the pen between his lips as he thinks of poetry and you with your widened eyes glued to the words in the book. The details aren’t perfect yet, but it is clear which silhouette is supposed to be who.

“Oh”, Taehyung lets out, meeting Jungkook’s eyes.

“Do you guys wanna see too?”

“Of course, show us.”

Jungkook flips the book.

“Kookie, wow”, you sit up, “this is so beautiful.”

Yoongi gawks with parted lips, which means that he is totally enchanted by the drawing.

“Thanks yeah. I still need to draw the details, but my eyes are tired. I need a break”, Jungkook says.

“It’s so pretty, I love it so much. Can I see what you painted too?”

“Of course.”

You crawl over the blanket to look at Taehyung’s canvas. The latter, drapes his arm around your waist and kisses your shoulder.

“Gosh, this is so pretty too. The colours are so nice.”

“Thank you. Do you like the book you are reading?”

“I do. It’s really captivating.”

“I am glad that you do.”

You and he exchange a soft kiss, then you sit back down again, preparing a new cup of lemonade because you feel thirsty.

“Tae, do you wanna take the swim now?” Jungkook asks.

“I do”, Taehyung says and begins undressing himself. Jungkook stands up as well, following his example.

Yoongi glances at them, while you run your eyes over them nonchalantly.

“What are you doing?” Yoongi gasps, ogling their briefs. He regrets it when seconds later, Taehyung pulls it down and exposes everything. Yoongi holds his breath in shock, gawking into his notebook with big eyes.

“Going for a swim”, Taehyung says and takes Jungkook’s hand, “the last one in the water is a stinky loser.”

“Tae wait, I wasn’t ready”, Jungkook follows him with laughter.

The two men play fight for a little, pushing and pulling each other to stop the other from getting into the water first. Jungkook ends the fight by suddenly wrapping his arm around Taehyung’s thighs and throwing him over his shoulder this way.

Taehyung squeaks, trying to fight his grip, but he can’t. Jungkook walks into the water with him, only letting him down once his head would be under water.

“Now there’s no winner”, Jungkook says.

“You are awful”, Taehyung whines, splashing his face with water.

Jungkook chuckles and drags Taehyung further out the lake with his arm around his waist.

You avert your eyes from them, studying Yoongi. His face is red.

“I didn’t expect them to strip.”

“Me neither”, he says, lowering his book so he could look at you, “I saw Tae’s dick. I didn’t wanna know how he looks.”

“I mean, it’s a good view.”

“You’re not funny.”

You chuckle, “sorry.”

“Brat”, Yoongi says, running his eyes over your hand, “what’s wrong, love?”

“What do you mean?”

“You keep touching your neck.”

“Ah that. I think I slept weird. It hurts, it’s giving me a headache.”

Yoongi sits up and places his hands on your shoulders.

“Lie down, I’ll make it better.”

“Really? Oh my god, I love massages”, you say and lie down so your head was resting in the crook of his crossed legs.

Yoongi fixes your hair for you so it wasn’t tugging and pulling, then runs his palms along your forehead and scalp. You grin, closing your eyes.

“This is already amazing.”

“Mhm”, Yoongi hums and begins his massage. He pays special attention to every inch of your tense neck, traces your features and massages your scalp and shoulders. He even dances his hands up and down your arms. All while the background is filled with Taehyung’s and Jungkook’s inaudible chatter and the song of birds. A slow wind has picked up which makes the leaves dance and babble as well. The sunlight breaks through the canopies, dancing behind your closed eyelids in shades of red and black.

“I can’t believe that today’s the last day. I want this to last forever”, you say after so many moments of nice silence.

“I know. We had a good time here. Although I’m a little sad you didn’t spend the night with me.”

You look up at him.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. I looked for you when I didn’t see you in bed, but you were already sleeping when I found you.”

“Gosh no, I’m sorry. The porridge knocked me right out.”

“It’s okay, I figured.”

“The next time we visit, I will make it up to you. I promise.”

“Mhm”, he traces your brows, “I don’t doubt it.”

“Kiss?”

He leans down and kisses your lips, smiling fondly when you caress his cheeks.

“I hope you’re not too sad or angry.”

“No. I just wanted to tell you that you owe me cuddles now”, he jokes, making you laugh.

“Min Yoongi, are you actually talking cute right now?”

He chuckles, rolling his eyes at you fondly.

“Maybe. Don’t tell anyone.”

You roll to your tummy and sit up, resting your weight on your hands so you could kiss his lips. He cradles your cheeks for it, letting you show him the rhythm with a fluttering heart.

You break the kiss with a gentle bite to his lower lip, eliciting a sigh from him.

“My lips are sealed, lover boy”, you whisper, giggling when he rolls his eyes at you.

“That’s a dumb nickname.”

“Yeah? Just like Boongie was?”

“No”, he chuckles, “Boongie was never bad.”

“I see”, you say, closing your eyes when he pulls you into a kiss. He shows you the rhythm this time around, sending flutters through your chest. His kiss tastes so goddamn good. He breaks it with a stub of his nose, sliding his big, tender hands to your neck.

“How’s the headache?” he asks you, rubbing circles on your skin.

“I can’t feel it anymore. You really helped.”

“That’s good”, his eyes soften, he caresses your chin, “princess.”

You lean into his touch, feeling so incredibly giddy.

“Boongie, can you watch me?”

“Sure?”

You sit back and lift your hand, closing your eyes to focus on the energies around you. The trees, the water and sun, the flowers. You focus on the sweet scent and dancing colours, using their good energies to create a flower. You open your eyes, presenting the flower to Yoongi with a blinding smile.

“Tada.”

“You’re such a good girl, princess. Look at you making flowers all on your own”, he praises, making you giggle and do a little happy dance.

“It’s for you”, you say, “can I put it in your hair?”

He tilts his head to you, closing his eyes as you put the blue flower into his hair. You give his ear a little rub before you pull back, gazing at him.

He leans in to kiss you, kissing you on the cheek afterwards.

“My little witch”, he whispers.

“Yoongi, stop”, you gasp, feeling your heart skip a beat or two.

He smiles lazily, tracing your lips before he pokes your nose.

“Boop.”

“Yoongi, oh my god”, you squeak, falling around his neck to cackle into the crook of his neck.

He laughs, hugging you in order not to fall on his back from the intensity of your love attack.

“What’s wrong? I didn’t even do anything”, he says calmly, even if his racing heart gives him away.

“Oh stop it you, you know exactly what you did. You did the boop”, you say, sitting back to poke his nose, “the boop.”

He ogles your finger, swiping it away gently to hold it instead.

“You’re cute.”

“___!”

You and Yoongi turn your heads upon hearing your name being called. Jungkook is coming out of the water with his eyes glued to you, seeming very determined. He is trying very hard to look cool and mysterious, but the slippery stones and pokey roots make it very hard not to wobble. He is definitely cute.

“Already cold?” you ask him.

“You”, he points at you with furrowed brows.

You point at yourself, “me?”

“You’re coming with me.”

You glance at Taehyung in the background, who obviously waits for Jungkook with a mischievous grin. Almost as if these two made up a plan. A plan to get you.

“I don’t seem to follow.”

Jungkook reaches your side. He picks you up and throws you over his shoulder, giving your butt a playful spank. He flicks water into Yoongi’s face, calling it a “distraction tactic” when the older man complains in a whine.

“Now you’re mine”, he says, walking back down to the lake.

You finally understand. He is going to carry you into the water.

“Wait Kook wait”, you squeak, wiggling in his hold, “let me at least take off my dress.”

The water is coming closer and closer.

“Kookie please”, you laugh.

Jungkook changes his grip on you so you are in his arms bridal style. He steps into the water and squats down slowly.

“Kook, wait my clothes please”, you beg and wiggle in his arms with lines of laughter on your face.

Jungkook snickers and turns to place you on dry land.

“You are lucky that your begs are my weakness”, he jokes.

You slap his chest gently, ��you meanie, you”, you snicker and hurry to get undressed.

You drop your stuff on the ground, squeaking loudly when Jungkook sweeps you off your feet again the second you are naked. Now there is no stopping him. He is walking into the water with you in his arms, smiling oh so brightly at the happy squeaks and squeals you let out.

“Oh it’s so cold! I’m gonna pay you back so bad!” you complain and then you are already submerged completely.

“It’s not even that bad”, Jungkook laughs, carrying you further out onto the lake.

“Yes it is. I was forced to my luck, you meanie you.”

Jungkook giggles when you bite his neck gently, feeling his heart skip a beat.

Taehyung takes over for Jungkook, carrying you in his arms and with his lips nibbling on your jawline.

“Hello there, my beautiful. It seems that our plan to kidnap you was successful”, he coos.

“God you two are awful. Brr it’s so chilly”, you laugh, snuggling yourself closer to Taehyung.

“We’ll warm you”, he purrs, snuggling you back.

Jungkook presses himself close to you on your other side so you are cocooned between them. You must admit, their technique helps splendidly. You are so warm and cozy between their heated bodies despite the cold water. The three of you snicker and laugh, exchanging little kisses as you enjoy the carefree moment.

Soon Taehyung lets go of you, giving you the freedom to swim on your own.

“We were thinking of swimming to the middle of the lake”, Taehyung says, “are you with us?”

“Of course I am”, you say and look at Yoongi, “my love, we’re swimming to the middle. Okay?”

He gives you a thumbs-up and lies down, covering his face with the edge of the blanket.

“He seems happy”, you say and look at your two boys, “loser gets his butt spanked. Go!”

You swim off quickly, cackling mischievously when your two boys whine in complaint.

“Spanks weren’t part of the deal”, Taehyung laughs.

“Hey, I wasn’t ready”, Jungkook whines.

They catch up with you soon. Taehyung pulls you back gently by your ankle.

“Come back you”, he warns with fondness in his eyes.

“I was only kidding”, you laugh and slow down so you were swimming between them, “let’s not race.”

“You are just scared that we would have beat you”, Jungkook says.

“Excuse me, mister? I am a better swimmer than you.”

“Mhm sure you are.”

You flick water at his face, earning yourself a flick of water back.

“Okay, okay truce. Truce”, you cackle.

“Fine, truce”, Jungkook agrees and looks around at the scenery, “it’s so nice here.”

“It truly is”, Taehyung agrees, “and it is the perfect weather for swimming. We must arrange more swimming days at the lake once we are home again.”

“I’d be down for that. It’s gonna be hot in the next few weeks, so it’s perfect.”

“I heard that too. I bet the lake’s gonna be really nice”, Jungkook says.

“We must take Jimin with us as well. He loves to swim in the lake”, Taehyung says, feeling nervous for a while because of past distaste between his best friend and the others.

“Sure, the more the merrier”, you agree.

“I won’t go easy on him by the way, so warn him”, Jungkook jokes, “I will beat him in swimming.”

Taehyung relaxes in relief, “he hates an easy win, so this is perfect.”

You stay by the lake until the sun begins its slow decent. You went for two more swims, taking Jungkook and Taehyung with you each time. Yoongi never went into the water and you didn’t pressure him. He seemed very content in lying under the tree and enjoying the silence.

Your grandparents have already cooked dinner when you arrive back home, welcoming you with smiles and amazing food. You talk a lot during dinner, taking more time than usual because nobody really wanted this last dinner together to end. In fact, you take so much time that your grandparents excuse themselves straight to bed after dinner, telling you a good night. You decided to stay one more night and leave by the morning, which is why you were only a little bit sad when you watched them leave.

It is Taehyung, who suggests keeping the night going by having a bonfire outside. You and Jungkook agreed instantly and Yoongi did too after he saw how happy you seemed about the idea.

So now bundled up in warmer clothes, you are outside, preparing the fire.

Taehyung hurries to the pile of wood, picking up as many as his arms can carry. Like this, he waddles to the fire pit, peeking over the pieces of wood.

“Help me. I cannot carry all of it alone”, he says.

“Do you even know how to make a fire?” Yoongi teases, walking to the wood pile as well.

“Of course I do. I was born in a time where the only sources of heat were fires”, Taehyung explains, hurrying back to the pile after dropping the logs next to the stone circle.

“It doesn’t mean that you spoiled brat didn’t unlearn it again”, Yoongi says.

Taehyung sends him a look.

“I shall poke you with a stick soon, hyung” he warns, making Yoongi chuckle.

He squats down next to Taehyung and picks up firewood.

“The question is if you still know how to start a fire”, Taehyung says as he nudges him with his shoulder.

“Why?” there is amusement in Yoongi’s eyes as he meets Taehyung’s gaze.

“Because you locked yourself up for most of your life like a little baby.”

Yoongi laughs and slaps his arm gently, “I think we’re equal now.”

Taehyung laughs and nudges Yoongi’s arm. They did enough teasing for now. They both stand up with firewood in their hands and waddle to the fireplace. Taehyung places his stacks down first, sorting them into a pile. Yoongi goes next, letting Taehyung do the sorting because he seems to have his own technique behind it.

“Where should we put it?” you ask with a pile of firewood in your arms.

Jungkook is beside you, carrying even more.

“Put it aside for now. We’ll use it once the fire’s shrinking.”

“Okie dokie”, Jungkook says and helps you set down the wood. He claps into his hands afterwards, resting his hands on his hips, “what now? How are we gonna start the fire?”

“___ is gonna start it.”

“Me? But I have no idea how to.”

“Yeah, you do”, Yoongi says and snaps his fingers to let a small flame appear.

“Wooah”, you and Jungkook gasp, while Taehyung seems as if he already knew the trick.

Yoongi closes his hand. The flame disappears.

“The important thing about fire magic is to remember that fire will always be stronger than you. There is nothing about fire which doesn’t want to consume you if you let it get out of control.”

“And you want me to do what you just did? What if I lose control?”

“You won’t. It’s fairly easy to create a flame and to keep it small”, Yoongi says and starts a flame again, “it’s also important to remember that for as long as the fire you create is still connected with you, it can’t hurt you”, he explains as he allows the flame to consume his entire hand.

“Yoongi, stop. You’re gonna hurt yourself”, you gasp and try to reach for him.

“I don’t feel it at all. The danger is in setting it free. Once the fire leaves your hand, it will do what fire does best. Consume. That is when you can get burned, so never set it free unless you need to.”

“I don’t know if I can do this. I’m scared.”

Yoongi stops the fire in his hand and brushes your cheek gently. His hand feels warm, but not hot. So it truly isn’t dangerous for the person creating it.

“You don’t feel ready?”

You shake your head, “I, I don’t wanna hurt anyone.”

“Okay, then I’ll do it. Yes?”

You nod your head, “yes, please.”

“Good job, princess. A good witch knows when a spell is too difficult for them. You’ve done very well in knowing your own limits”, he praises, sending flutters through your tummy.

“Thanks”, you mumble with heated cheeks.

“So how are you going to light the fire now?” Jungkook asks.

“Easy”, Yoongi says and squats down in front of the wood pile. He lights his hand on fire and grabs one of the wooden logs. He grasps it tightly, infecting it with the hot flames until it glows all on its own. He places the log under the other pieces and grabs another one to light it as well. He extinguishes his hand and stands up. His eyes flash orange for a second as he forces the fire to grow. It pulsates rhythmically like a heartbeat and within seconds, the entire pile is aflame in bright, hot fire.

“And you thought that I could do that? This was seriously so impressive.”

“Seriously, hyung. You’re so cool.”

You and Jungkook gush, making Yoongi’s cheeks flush rosy.

“It’s not even that difficult. Fire magic is actually very easy to learn because fire is such a powerful source. It’s dangerous, but easy, which honestly makes it as dangerous as it is.”

“Because every idiot can learn it, right?” Jungkook asks.

Yoongi nods his head, “exactly. Every idiot can learn it and many pay the price because of it.”

“I can imagine. Fire has always been scary to me. I really respect it.”

“And you should. Fire isn’t something to play with.”

Taehyung chuckles, making the rest of you look at him.

“Why are you laughing?” Jungkook asks.

“Just because our dear Yoongi can never stop preaching.”

“Yah, I’m just saying”, Yoongi complains, but relaxes when he hears you and Jungkook snicker. He scoffs, softening his features, “I guess I really can’t stop preaching.”

“You’re like a dad”, Jungkook teases.

“I literally said on Tuesday that he’d be the type of dad who would be overly worried at all times and who’d always tell the kids to be careful.”

“Yes, this would be so him”, Jungkook laughs, caressing Yoongi’s back fondly.

“You guys are brats”, Yoongi mumbles and escapes his giddy feelings by sitting down on the ground.

“Wait, hyung I’ll get some blankets and pillows”, Taehyung says and disappears to run to the house.

“Why’s he running? Dirt never hurt anyone before.”

“You’ll complain about it later”, you say. You stand right behind Yoongi, running your fingers over his scalp in a tingly massage.

Yoongi tilts his head back, resting it against your legs.

“Whatever, brat”, he mumbles and closes his eyes, “that feels good.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“You’re so cool, my love.”

Yoongi hums, but his face stays stoic otherwise. You know him well enough by now, that you are aware that this is his way of showing gratitude for a compliment.

Taehyung soon returns with the pillows and blanket you used for the picnic. You help him set it up, using the tree trunks, your grandfather laid around the fire pit to sit on, as your backrests.

You sit between Yoongi and Taehyung, while Jungkook sits on the other side of Yoongi. You are bundled up like this, sharing both the warmth of the fire and that of your bodies.

“So what are we gonna do now?” you ask into the silence.

“I don’t know”, Jungkook answers you.

“We could roast a few marshmallows”, Taehyung suggests.

“I’m not really hungry though.”

“I must admit, me neither”, Taehyung says and takes a deep breath, releasing it with a slight pout.

“What if we read something?” Jungkook suggests.

“But I don’t really want to.”

“Yeah, me neither actually”, Jungkook gives up with a pout.

“What if we play UNO?”

“No, this game is awful”, Taehyung instantly says.

“It’s only awful because you always lose”, you laugh.

“And must there be another reason for it to be awful? It is impossible to win.”

“No, it’s not. You’re just bad at it”, Jungkook teases.

“How dare you”, Taehyung gasps, clutching his imaginary pearls and making you and Jungkook laugh with it.

“Ah, you’re so funny”, you say and sigh contently, letting your eyes run over the endless flames. Their dance is almost hypnotising. Never ending and rhythmic, “have we reached a point in our day where we’re bored?” you ask, eyes still glued to the flame as if you were zoning out. It is so relaxing to watch the fire.

“Maybe.”

“Perhaps, we have.”

“Wow, that’s something new. I genuinely can’t remember a day where we were genuinely bored. Either one of us had to be somewhere or we were fighting some evil or we were too busy hunting shadows or being mad at each other. I don’t think that we had a day where we were all bored together.”

“True, yeah.”

“I must admit that I prefer the boredom.”

“Yeah”, you snuggle into Taehyung, “yeah I kinda do too.”

Jungkook rubs Yoongi’s upper back.

“Do you like it too, hyungie?”

“Yeah, I guess”, he says, touching his own ear nervously.

“You don’t seem like it.”

“N-no I do. It just…makes me nervous.”

“The boredom?”

“The peace said boredom means.”

Jungkook kisses his cheek even if that flusters Yoongi immensely.

“Do you wanna talk about it? We’re here for you if you do.”

Yoongi shakes his head, “I guess I’m just paranoid.”

“I’m sorry you feel this way, my love”, you say, caressing his thigh.

Yoongi gives you a shy smile, “it’s okay. Thanks”, he takes a deep breath. The darker aura still surrounds him however. You exchange a worried look with Jungkook.

“I have an idea”, Jungkook says.

“Tell us.”

“How about we each write down something we want to get rid off and then we throw it into the flames?”

“Like a cleansing ritual?”

“Yeah. I think we could all use that. We’ve been through a lot lately and I think we have a few bad things weighing us down. Maybe we could use the last night here to leave the bad things behind.”

“And come back from this journey as people further up their paths of healing”, Taehyung says.

“Exactly.”

“I love this idea very much. I know that I have quite a few things weighing me down.”

“I can think of a few things as well”, you say.

“Me too”, Jungkook agrees, “and you? Do you wanna join, hyungie?”

Yoongi falters for a moment, picking at his own skin.

“You don’t have to.”

“No, I”, he says, rubbing his neck shyly, “I want to.”

“Awesome, then we’ll do that. I’ll get the paper”, Jungkook says, leaving the fire.

“Don’t forget the pencils!” Taehyung calls after him.

Jungkook returns very soon, handing out papers and pens. He sits down cross legged, keeping a little distance to all of you so nobody could peek. Soon silence surrounds you where each of you writes down something you want to leave behind. Writing it down already feels healing. It comes easy to Taehyung and Jungkook and feels freeing to you. Yoongi looks around for the first few moments, refusing to write down what burdens him even if he knows every fucking word of it. He repeated it in his head over and over again to the point where he has created its own burdening poet about it. He knows what weighs him down, but is scared to put it on paper. Because writing it down finally makes it real and he doesn’t know if he is ready for that. And so it happens that each of you have finished your papers while Yoongi’s is still empty. You each return to the fire, sitting around it.

“Did everybody write something down?” Jungkook asks.

“I did.”

“Of course I did.”

“Yeah”, Yoongi lies, glancing at his empty paper.

“Nice, then let’s gather by the fire”, Jungkook says and stands up to walk to the fire. You follow his lead.

“Can I start?” he asks.

“Yeah.”

He lifts his hand over the flames, looking at the dancing fire, “I want to keep the uncontrollable hunger here. I know I’m not at the end of my journey to control and that I still have lots to learn, but I want to leave the uncontrollable hunger here. I want to return as a Ripper, who can kiss his lovers the way he was able to kiss them here. I want to return as a Ripper, who might not be able to drink human blood yet but who doesn’t go crazy at the mere sight of it. That’s what I want to leave here, those uncontrollable surges of hunger and violence”, he looks at you and the others, giving you a smile.

You and Taehyung return it, while Yoongi is too shy to do so. Jungkook looks back at the fire and opens his hand. The paper dances down and down until the flames finally swallow it. Jungkook takes a deep breath, folding his hands in front of his chest and closing his eyes as if he was praying.

You and the others do the same because it seemed important to Jungkook. You only open your eyes once you hear Jungkook sigh in relief. He smiles at all of you.

“That felt good. Who wants to go next?”

“May I?”

“Of course, Tae.”

Taehyung lifts his hand, looking into the fire.

“I want to rid myself of the traumatic memories haunting me. I made a lot of mistakes in my life, I am aware of them, so I want to leave this side of me here as well. I want to return as someone who uses his immortality to do good, to create art and make people happy. I want to be someone who stops doubting his place in this family because I finally became someone whose deeds are worthy of it. I want to return as someone who can heal from what was done to him so that one day I will be happy again. And, I know this isn’t something I want to rid myself of but a goal of myself, I want to help Jimin heal as well. He is my best friend and my true mate and one day, I want to see his smile reach his eyes again.”

Taehyung opens his hand, letting the paper sink into the flames. He folds his hands and closes his eyes, you all follow his lead, keeping them closed until he sighs in relief.

He wipes at his eyes.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I am more than fine”, he assures you, smiling honestly, “my heart feels lighter again. Thank you, Jungkook. This ritual was immensely healing.”

“I’m glad that it could help you. I like what you said”, Jungkook says, intertwining his fingers with Taehyung.

“My turn next”, you say.

“Go ahead.”

You lift your hand, looking into the flames.

“I was raised thinking that I’m unworthy of love, that I’m a burden and that for as long as I’m useful and make no mistakes, I’m wanted. I want to rid myself of this. Being here with you guys and spending time with my grandparents again made me realise that I am very easy to love unconditionally. I know that I’m far from perfect and that I make mistake or do stupid shit sometimes, but you guys and my grandparents never make me feel as if I’m loved less because of it. So I want to come back as someone who loves herself and who doesn’t beat herself up because of small mistakes. I’m human and humans aren’t perfect, but that doesn’t make them less worthy of love.”

You open your hand and let the paper fall into the flames. Just like Taehyung and Jungkook, you fold your hands and close your eyes, thinking your wishes far, far into the endlessness of the universe. Your boys only open their eyes once you sigh in relief.

You smile at them, “I feel so light all of a sudden. This really made me happy.”

“I’m glad it did. You also said really nice things”, Jungkook says, holding your hand as well.

When Yoongi doesn’t immediately start, you all look at him.

“It’s your turn, my love.”

“I know”, he whispers.

“We’re ready whenever you’re ready.”

“I know.”

He lifts his hand. He hesitates. He lowers it again.

“I lied. I didn’t write anything down”, he confesses, showing you the empty paper.

“Why not? Did you not think of anything?”

“I did, but…”

“But what?”

“If I write it down it becomes real.”

“Exactly and then you can throw it into the flames and watch it burn. You could try, maybe it will help.”

“I don’t know”, he looks into the fire with furrowed brows.

“You can also just tell us and throw away the paper as a symbol”, Jungkook suggests.

“I guess I could do that, yeah”, Yoongi whispers.

He needs a few moments to gain courage and when he finally does, he has crumbled the paper in his damp hand.

“I’m scared. I’m not nervous, I’m scared.”

Yoongi’s confession hangs heavy in the air. You are all looking at him. Yoongi doesn’t often confess that he is scared.

“Why are you scared, my love?” you ask him, holding his hand.

“Because one day you’ll have learned control and then we can create the cure.”

Taehyung and Jungkook exchange a look.

“And that means we have to see Namjoon again”, you say.

“Yeah”, Yoongi whispers, nodding his head and squeezing your hand, “I’m scared of that.”

“Because he’ll be mean to you?” Jungkook asks.

Yoongi shakes his head.

“Are you scared that he might break free and use it on you?” Taehyung asks.

Yoongi shakes his head again.

“I’m scared that I won’t be able to do it and I guess…I guess I’m also scared that it might kill him.”

“Why are you scared of that? He deserves it”, Taehyung says snappishly, but flushes in embarrassment when you nudge him in warning.

“It’s because he was his best friend once. Let’s try to see his side as well”, you say.

“Is that so?” Taehyung asks, glancing at Yoongi.

Yoongi nods his head, staring into the flames.

“What if it kills him? Then I’m so alone.”

“No, you’re not. You will always have us”, Jungkook says.

“I know, but nobody who gets how it is to be a Creator. I don’t wanna be alone.”

“Oh, my love”, you get out, hugging him from the side.

“I’m so angry at myself. I know that he is a monster and that he is everything which makes vampires wrong. I know that he tortured too many people and killed far too many and yet I still don’t want him to die. I’m so angry at myself for feeling this way, for being so scared and, and being a, a fucking hopeful coward. I keep wishing that the cure will bring him back, that he will become the gentle, kind man he was in the past and I know that this is wrong of me to wish. He became a monster, he hurt people I should wish him dead, but I can’t. Why can’t I fucking want him dead?”

“My love, stop that. You’re being really mean to yourself right now.”

“Why shouldn’t I? I’m the worst.”

“No, you’re not”, you gasp.

“Yes, I am. I’m the reason why so many people burned in the Eternal Scorch, why we were cursed, why vampires exist. I’m even the reason why we are hated. Because I lost control we became hunted, my friends died and Namjoon was shot in the head. He became a monster because of me. I’m the fucking worst.”

“Hyung!” Jungkook exclaims in shock.

“Yoongi, please don’t say that”, you exclaim, “your past mistakes don’t define you anymore. Yeah, you did a lot of shit, but you learned from it and not everything bad which happened was your fault.”

“I can’t feel this way.”

“Do not speak like that”, Taehyung gasps, “you are so very far from being the worst”, he says, hurrying to Yoongi’s side so he could take his hand. Like this, they are clutching Yoongi’s crumbled paper together.

Yoongi glances at him shyly.

“I have learned a great deal about you during this holiday. You are so very far from being the worst. You love people and you show it through a multitude of ways. Eventhough you always say that you seem cold and rude, you aren’t. You love to cook because it means that your family is fed well, you love to help because you cannot stand to know that people struggle alone, you always carry a fond word on your tongue because you want the people around you to feel good about themselves. You are filled with so much love, hyung, with so much love that you cannot shake the love you once felt for Namjoon.”

Yoongi tightens his jaw, trying so hard to keep the burning in his eyes from producing tears.

“___ always says that I’m full of love”, he whispers.

“Because she speaks the truth. You are. You are full of it and you will never be alone. I understand your hesitation and your fears, so do not struggle alone for you have people by your side who are willing to help you as well.”

Yoongi smiles, “thank you, kiddo”, he whispers and slides his hand out of Taehyung’s gentle hold. He lifts it over the flames.

“I’m scared, but I’m not alone. I guess, what I want to burn is my self-loathing. I get so angry at myself whenever I feel something unpleasant and instead of looking for help, I blame myself for my emotions to the point where I start hating myself. I guess, I don’t wanna hate myself anymore. I don’t know if I can do it, but I’ll try.”

“Trying already means that you are beginning to love yourself. If you still hated yourself, you wouldn’t want to try”, Jungkook says.

“Yeah, yeah I guess it does. Fuck, you guys, stop making me fucking emotional.”

You all laugh fondly, cuddling closer to Yoongi.

“Fuck, this is so stupid”, he says, but continues, “I want to burn my self-loathing and the fear of stuff I can’t control. As much as I try to control the outcome, some things are out of my control. Maybe Namjoon will die, but I can’t control this outcome so instead of being scared of it, I have to learn to live with it.”

He hesitates with opening his hand.

“Can I still wish that he doesn’t die?”

“Of course you can.”

“Then I wanna wish that he doesn’t die and that he becomes the gentle, kind man of the past again”, Yoongi says and opens his hand.

The fire swallows his paper, Yoongi squeezes your hand and Taehyung’s, staring into the flames until the paper is truly gone. He takes a deep breath, releasing it through his mouth.

“How do you feel?”

“Light.”

“I liked what you said, hyungie.”

Yoongi smiles at Jungkook.

“Thank you, kiddo. You had a good idea.”

“I’m grateful that you guys did it with me. Hoseok and Seokjin always do it with me whenever summer ends, so this tradition means a lot to me.”

“Maybe we can do it with them this year. We’ll include Jimin and Emma as well and have a barbeque in the garden”, you suggest.

“I love this idea so much, wow baby”, Jungkook gushes with sparkly eyes.

“I like it too. I wanna make the food”, Yoongi says.

“I bet it’s gonna be so delicious, my love.”

“And we shall each bring our instruments and make music until late into the night”, Taehyung says.

Yoongi smiles, “that’s a good idea, Tae. You know what we could do right now?”

“Tell us.”

“Make music.”

“Hyung, yes!” Taehyung exclaims, “we haven’t made music together in too long!”

“Okay, we’ll do it”, Yoongi says and reaches into the air to pull a guitar and violin from nothing.

“Woah, did you just pull a guitar and violin out of thin air?”

“Yeah”, Yoongi says, handing the violin to Taehyung, “manifestation magic. The object’s not really permanent, but it’s gonna stay long enough to have fun with it.”

“What do you channel for that to work?”

“Yourself in a sense. You reach into your imagination and pull out whatever you imagine.”

“Wait. Like this?” you ask and try it only to fail, “well, bollocks”, you pout, sagging your shoulders.

Yoongi chuckles fondly, leaning in to kiss your cheek.

“You’re cute. That’s difficult magic to learn, give it time.”

“I see. God, you’re so cool Yoongi.”

‘Mmh”, another kiss then he sits down on the ground. He looks at his guitar and begins tuning it. Its soft clinking and strumming fills the air together with Taehyung tuning his violin.

The rest of you sit down next to them.

Yoongi relaxes after a few moments by lying down and resting his head on Jungkook’s lap. He is playing the guitar softly, gazing up at him.

“Hey there, hyungie”, he says, combing his fingers through his bangs.

He blinks his eyes at the younger man slowly and gives him a toothless smile. Jungkook continues to play with his hair as Yoongi strums the guitar and gazes at him.

“Done. Your magical violin was terribly out of tune”, Taehyung says and lies down as well, resting his head on your lap.

“Mhm”, Yoongi hums.

You meet Taehyung’s eyes, retorting his smile.

“Comfy?”

“Very, you have comfortable thighs.”

“You’re cute”, you say, combing your fingers through Taehyung’s soft locks.

Taehyung lifts the violin to his chin and begins playing.

Something truly magical happens then. Yoongi and Taehyung sync within seconds, complimenting each other’s melody until it becomes one lively song. You imagine flowers blooming in spring and the beginning of a trickling stream. It is soft and gentle like a new beginning which will turn into something bigger with them. For now it dances shyly through the air, making the fire shine brighter and the scents of the night stronger. You glance at Jungkook, exchanging a fond smile with him. Life is well. Life is truly and honestly well.

The next song is lively, showcasing the happiness of life being so, so well. Yoongi and Taehyung have to sit up for it, matching each other’s tempos and supporting the other’s melody perfectly. There are parts where Yoongi’s guitar shines and others were Taehyung’s violin has its moment, while other parts are there for them to harmonise.

You think of running through fields or dancing in pubs when you listen to the melody.

They must have played together like this countless times before. Yoongi knows exactly what notes to play to support Taehyung’s vigorous play and Taehyung knows exactly when to slow down to give Yoongi his time to shine. You never figured that guitar and violin go so well together, but they do. Oh you want to jump up and dance.

“Kookie, do you wanna dance with me?”

“Dance with you?” Jungkook’s eyes light up, “yes. Oh my god, I would love to dance with you “

“Awesome. Come on”, you say and pull him up by his hands.

And so it happens that you and Jungkook dance under the forest trees while Yoongi and Taehyung accompany you with music. The melodies and your squeaky laughter echoes through the forest, letting every way of life know that time together was a wonderful time.

It will always be a wonderful time.

60 notes · View notes

skzkiof · 5 months

Text

kiss me;

ivantill, 8.7k read on ao3

For a second he just stood there dumbly, eyes wide open. He heard a gasp from the side then a whispered, “I thought they weren’t actually supposed to kiss here?” Till hadn’t prepared himself for this, but he knew he couldn’t risk ruining the scene even more. Eyelashes fluttering, he closed his eyes and cupped Ivan’s face, kissing him back with fervor.

Till couldn’t believe what he’d just heard. Surely he had misheard, or maybe he hadn’t actually woken up this morning and he was still dreaming.

His manager looked as real as ever, though, staring at him with a hint of knowing amusement. He couldn’t stand her sometimes. (He loved her.)

“I thought you’d be excited,” she sighed dramatically, crossing her arms. “I guess maybe we should consider pulling out of the movie and – ”

His hand jerked out without his permission, fast as lightning, grabbing her arm. “Don’t even joke about that, Mizi.”

Her answering grin was all teeth. “They’ll want to do a chemistry read, first,” she put her hand over his. “Don’t get too excited. Nothing is guaranteed yet.”

For all they knew, he wouldn’t even get cast. Or if he did, maybe they’d kick Till off the project and replace him if their chemistry wasn’t promising enough. He really hoped it would be. But either way, he would be meeting him.

Till felt himself grinning before he could stop it, “I’m meeting Ivan.”

Till couldn’t recall the exact moment he discovered Ivan. To be fair, most people probably couldn’t. He was everywhere, it seemed – commercials, movies, television, even music videos.

What he could recall – as clear as if it’d happened yesterday – was the feeling he had felt. It was like a dam had opened and there was no stopping it. He realized he wanted more out of life.

He didn’t just want to continue being an extra on every set, the side-character who was killed off after one or two episodes.

Since then, he’d been able to build a decent name for himself. He wasn’t Ivan, by any means, but he was well-known enough to get the lead in an upcoming highly anticipated movie. And if the universe smiled upon him, just one last time, he would hopefully get to have Ivan as his love interest.

“I am running on exactly two hours of sleep, by the way.”

Mizi snorted, side-eyeing him. “I can tell,” she teased, and he knew it was just that: a joke but he still couldn’t help the sudden rush of insecurity.

As if sensing it by some form of magic, she slowed to a stop in the hallway and took his arm.

“You look great, Till. You haven’t even gotten makeup done yet and you still look amazing.” She squeezed his arm. “You’ve got this, you know that, right?”

He forced a smile. “Don’t you know confidence is my middle name?”

And usually it was true. If there was one thing he had over most of his competition in the industry, it was overflowing confidence.

Mizi smiled back, far more sincere. “Come on,” she said, tugging him along gently. “We don’t want to be late.”

Before the chemistry read, he went to get his makeup done as scheduled. Hyuna was no better than Mizi, grinning wildly as she gently applied a bit of concealer under his eyes.

“Let me guess,” she said, “didn’t sleep much?”

Till rolled his eyes, but made sure not to move. “I wonder if every actor has such a nosy makeup artist or is it just me?”

“Hmm, I would say you’re just lucky.” She winked and stepped back. “You look good enough to eat.”

He snorted. If he wasn’t so nervous underneath it all, he might’ve cracked a joke. Like how the only person he wanted to eat him was —

The door swung open, startling him. “Come on – ” he relaxed when he saw it was just Mizi. “We only have a few minutes.”

Quickly stumbling out of the chair, he rushed to her side and followed her into the hallway. As they walked toward the room set aside for their scheduled chemistry read, Mizi looked him up and down, not even trying to be discreet. Till made sure no one was around before quietly flipping her off.

Couldn’t tarnish his reputation and all that.

She giggled, light and airy. “I was just going to say,” she bumped their shoulders together, gentle, “you look good. Don’t let anything bring you down, okay?”

And he knew it wasn’t just empty words; Mizi had been there for him since the start of his career, long before he’d managed to actually make a name for himself. She’d been there with open arms (and an extra large pizza) every time he’d been turned down from a role, every time a casting director had scoffed like he was hilarious for even thinking he had a chance.

It had been hard, then, but motivating. He never wanted to be underestimated ever again. He thought he’d never feel so scared again, walking toward an audition room. It was a pointless fear. He had joked but surely they wouldn’t actually try to kick him out, even if the chemistry read wasn’t a success.

“Break a leg,” Mizi whispered just as they stopped in front of the door.

Till could hear voices through the wood. He concentrated and tried to see if he could pick out Ivan’s voice, in the sea of them, but he wasn’t sure if he could trust himself. He thought he heard him, a familiar drawl he had heard on television a million times, but he could’ve just been imagining it.

Mizi glanced at him, a silent question. He just nodded.

Without another word between them, she turned and opened the door.

Till didn’t even realize he’d been holding his breath as his eyes scanned the room: it was all the usual people – the casting director sat at the table with two other staff members on each side, a few other stray staff members were scattered around the room.

In the middle of all of them was Ivan.

He was smiling politely as others talked to him, a small quirk of his mouth. Till must’ve stared for a second too long because suddenly Ivan was lifting his head and their eyes met.

Till had seen him a hundred times, at least, through a screen but he wasn’t sure anything could’ve prepared him for this moment.

For seeing him, here, like this, in real life. Ivan was even more stunning in person.

Ivan’s smile stretched just a little wider, barely noticeable. Till should’ve smiled back but he felt like he was frozen.

“Okay,” the casting director – Luka – stood up from the table. “From what I’ve been told, this is your first time meeting, correct?”

Till didn’t even realize he was addressing them until Mizi gave a gentle nudge at his side. He flushed, standing a little taller. He might’ve been meeting his idol, for lack of a better word, but he was still a professional.

“Yes,” he answered, cursing the slight shake to his voice.

Ivan nodded. “I’ve seen him plenty, of course, but never met, no.”

Till felt a shiver down his spine. Ivan. Ivan had seen him before, too, which shouldn’t have been surprising. He had been on a number of notable series by now, but for some reason he still hadn’t been prepared to hear it.

“Wonderful,” Luka said, “Everyone – ” He did a little twirl with his finger, making a point to address everyone in the room. “Out.”

Till knew the process by now. Luka’s process, at least. He could be a little unorthodox. Usually he didn’t mind it, but right now he was already starting to feel sweat pool at the small of his back.

Mizi let out a tiny huff of amusement as she helped to herd everyone out of the room. Last to go was Luka, who didn’t even say a word before closing the door.

If Ivan was confused, he didn’t voice it. For a moment, the room was silent with just the two of them.

“Sorry,” Till said eventually, clearing his throat. He dared a glance in Ivan’s direction; he was standing just a few feet away, a thoughtful quirk to his head. “Luka can be a bit, uh. Unorthodox in his methods. He always likes to give actors a few minutes by themselves before starting the read.”

He was proud of himself; his voice was steady and clear.

Ivan hummed, but still didn’t say anything. Till took advantage of the moment to really look Ivan over. He was beautiful; dark hair swept back with a few loose strands, eyes lined with black – not too much, just enough to somehow make his dark eyes look even darker, his lips shined with a thin layer of gloss, skin clear and perfect.

The way his mouth was twisted, Till could even see his fang. Not literal, of course, it was just his canine – especially sharp and pronounced – but it had always been one of his selling points that fans seemed to like.

He looked like he was conjured up in a lab somehow.

And Till, well. He wasn’t naive. He knew he was attractive – wouldn’t have gotten this far in the industry if he wasn’t – but he felt lacking compared to Ivan, more than he had in a long time.

Without thinking, he reached up and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to tame it. But the wild look was part of his appeal, Hyuna had always said. Made him stand out.

“Are you going to keep staring at me or actually introduce yourself?”

Till startled, yanking his hand out of his hair hard enough he winced a little. He opened his mouth, ready to apologize, but then he saw Ivan was smiling. Barely, really, more like a smirk.

Clearing his throat, he wiped his hands off on his jeans in what he hoped was a discreet move (he was still sweating like crazy) and stepped forward. “Why should I introduce myself when you apparently already know my name?”

He froze as soon as the words were out of his mouth. He was so stupid.

This was Ivan – the Ivan – and here he was already messing everything up because he never quite knew when to shut his mouth. He waited, expecting the worst. He wouldn’t have even been surprised if he’d pushed him out of the way and stormed out of the room.

But instead Ivan did the complete opposite. He gave a little laugh, eyes crinkling just a little around the edges. Till felt something warm blossom in the pit of his stomach.

“I haven’t had someone talk to me like that in, well, ages.” His eyes were still sparkling when he finally stopped laughing. He extended a hand. Till moved quickly before he could think too hard and just make himself more nervous. Ivan’s hand was warm, smooth.

Till knew his own hands weren’t nearly as smooth, from playing guitar. It was just a hobby he had picked up on the side, nothing more, but his hands still suffered for it.

“You must play an instrument,” Ivan said, startling him. For a moment, he wondered if he’d accidentally spoken his thoughts but then Ivan tilted his head. “Guitar?”

Till swallowed around the lump in his throat; Ivan’s thumb gently moved over his knuckles, once, fleeting, before he was pulling away. Maybe he’d imagined it. “Yeah. Um. Just a hobby.”

“I would love to hear you play, if ever given the chance,” Ivan said. Normally, Till would’ve brushed it off as empty words but there was something oddly sincere about the way he said it.

He dropped his gaze, focusing on the collar of Ivan’s shirt. Anything to make sure he didn’t keep staring at his face. “Yeah. Sure.”

Before he – or Ivan – could say anything else, the door was opened without even a knock. Till spun around as Luka entered the room followed by the rest of the staff and finally Mizi alongside a woman he didn’t quite recognize. He wondered if she was part of staff and somehow he had just never noticed her until now.

That question was answered quickly when she went to Ivan’s side. “You’ve totally got this,” she said, hushed but just loud enough Till could hear.

He wondered if that was true. Didn’t want to get his hopes up.

“Okay, since I’ve given you both more than enough time to get acquainted.” Luka nodded at the scripts on the table. “Go ahead.”

Till forced his hand to not shake as he reached out and grabbed his version of the script; the part they’d be rehearsing, today, had been highlighted. It wasn’t too long. He just had to get through the scene without any mistakes.

He skimmed through it quickly, saw Ivan doing the same, even though they had both already read the script. Ivan, possibly only one or twice, but Till had read it nearing a dozen times.

So how did he manage to forget what happened at the end?

They didn’t kiss, not in this scene, but they almost did and that was enough to have Till suddenly rethinking everything. You’re a professional, he reminded himself, and tried to believe it.

He had certainly kissed plenty of people on set by now but admittedly he had never found any of them quite as alluring as Ivan.

Still, this was a chance to prove himself. He wouldn’t let that get in the way of doing his job properly.

“We don’t have all day,” Luka said, as impatient as ever.

Till resisted the urge to glare at him and simply set the script aside; it wasn’t frowned upon to read from the script during chemistry reads, of course, but he had the entire thing memorized already.

Ivan probably hadn’t been able to memorize it in such a short time but Till was surprised to find he set his script aside as well. He was always called an acting prodigy by media, the best the industry had seen in ages, and it seemed like it went beyond just a good performance on screen.

They both stepped closer to each other, waited until Luka gave the final nod.

All jokes aside, Till really was a professional. He felt like he was a different person when he got into character. Immediately he felt his eyes start to sting, his bottom lip tremble a little.

“You lied to me,” he said, voice thick with emotion.

It was surprisingly easy to look Ivan in the eyes all of a sudden. Ivan stared back just as intensely, reached for his hands. He held them, loose and gentle. “You know I didn’t have a choice.”

Till jerked his hands away. “But you promised me.”

“I know, I know,” Ivan’s eyes were glossy too, brimming with so much emotion Till had to remind himself they were acting. He couldn’t remember ever having to do that before. “But I need you to trust me, okay?”

Till swallowed. “I – I don’t know if I can,” he whispered, just loud enough for Luka and the others to hear.

Ivan frowned, looking thoughtful for a moment. “How can I convince you to trust me?”

He opened his mouth, closed it, cursed himself because – he’d fucking forgotten the line. How could he have forgotten the line? He dared a quick glance at Luka, who was watching him with slightly narrowed eyes.

He was so screwed. Ivan was definitely getting the role, no doubt, but not before Till was probably kicked off the project.

And now he was so nervous he was shaking a little, hopefully not enough to be noticed by Luka and the others but there was no hiding it from Ivan, as close as he was.

So much for being a professional.

Maybe it would be better just to get it over with and admit his mistake, take whatever consequences would follow, even if that meant being kicked off the project. Even if it meant not getting to work with Ivan.

But as soon as he opened his mouth, Ivan surged forward and kissed him.

For a second he just stood there dumbly, eyes wide open. He heard a gasp from the side then a whispered, “I thought they weren’t actually supposed to kiss here?”

The only thing that followed was silence, but Till knew the answer; he might’ve forgotten his line but he still remembered how the scene ended – Ivan’s hand on his neck, thumb stroking his jaw as he begged him for one more chance.

Not a kiss, but something close. The actual kiss came far later in the script.

Till hadn’t prepared himself for this, but he knew he couldn’t risk ruining the scene even more. Eyelashes fluttering, he closed his eyes and cupped Ivan’s face, kissing him back with fervor.

It was like something out of his wildest dreams but also not at all.

After a few seconds, he dared to open his eyes, surprised to find Ivan already staring back at him.

Suddenly Ivan was pulling away, turning toward Luka. “Sorry, I got a bit carried away.”

Till licked his lips, flushed when he realized what he’d done and quickly pursed his lips into a thin line to ignore the urge to do it again.

“Well,” Luka looked torn between amusement and annoyance, “I supposed you were going to kiss him eventually one way or another.”

Till blinked as the words settled. “Wait, you mean – ”

“Don’t get too excited,” he interrupted, already standing, “but you should be optimistic.” Weirdly, he said it while staring at Till like he was the one auditioning for the spot, not Ivan. There was no way he knew, right? Or maybe he was letting him know he was going to be kind enough to ignore his obvious mistake. “We’ll call you once we’ve discussed it and made a final decision.”

Till watched as Luka left with the staff, not even giving them a glance back. For once, he was thankful to be ignored.

Once they were gone, Mizi rushed to his side. “Are you okay?” she asked, side-eyeing Ivan skeptically.

He appreciated her concern, as always, but he was fine. If kissing strangers was an issue for him, he probably would’ve picked a different career path, but even those kisses were usually planned for and this wasn’t, which was jarring, yes, but he wasn’t upset.

Ivan’s manager was at his side, too, looking at him with disapproval. Till wondered how often he did unexpected stuff like that.

Finally he brushed her off and stepped forward, closer to Till. Mizi pursed her lips but didn’t intervene; she really was the perfect manager for him.

“I apologize,” he said, giving a slight bow. “I shouldn’t have done that without warning, but…”

He trailed off, and Mizi finally spoke, “But?”

But Till already knew the answer. Ivan smiled, but it wasn’t mean. “You forgot your line,” he said. It wasn’t a question. Mizi startled, glancing at the script still laid out on the table. “An honest mistake. I didn’t want you getting chided for it, and I thought it’d work as a good enough distraction.”

It certainly had. Till could still feel the press of his lips – plush, but just a little dry.

“You did that for Till?” Mizi asked, sounding skeptical. Till couldn’t blame her; people in the industry rarely looked out for each other like that, nevertheless strangers.

Ivan nodded, his smile growing just a little wider. “I guess you could say I’m intrigued.” He extended a hand and Till took a second too long to move, realizing his intent. Ivan squeezed his hand. “I look forward to working together.”

Till envied his confidence. Technically, nothing was confirmed yet. But even he knew it wasn’t up in the air. Luka just liked making people sweat.

“Me too,” he said.

“Did you see Ivan’s manager?” Mizi asked the next day. Shooting wouldn’t start for a few weeks but she came over often just to hang out.

Till blinked. “The girl with the, uh, blue hair and piercing stare?”

He didn’t miss the way her mouth twitched, forming a smile for only a second. “Yeah.”

Till had recognized that smile, however brief. He looked back to the television. “You should go for it.”

“Wh – what?” she stammered, nearly spilling their bowl of popcorn. “I don’t – I mean – ”

He grinned, side-eyeing her. “I always knew you were into the stoic types.”

“She wasn’t – ” Mizi pursed her lips, looking down. “When you two were doing the read, you know how we all left? Well, we talked some.” Her cheeks were flushed, nearly the same shade of her regularly-dyed hair. “She was nicer than you’d think, looking at her.”

Till wasn’t sure how much he believed her. Everyone was nice to Mizi. She was just that kind of person. You would have to be pure evil to be mean to her. “I trust your judgment,” he said instead, reaching out and squeezing her arm.

She peered at him from under her eyelashes. “But what if it complicates things? Especially when you’ll be working with Ivan for the next few months. And I mean, I don’t even know if she’s, you know.”

“And you’ll never know if you don’t ask,” he replied, making sure to soften his voice. “And don’t worry about me, okay? I can take care of my own shit.”

Till was confident. It was something Mizi always said she admired about him; he knew what he wanted, and he wasn’t afraid to work for it.

But he was also well-aware of his own shortcomings. He could be testy and impatient, and didn’t always take being corrected or criticized well.

“What if I say something wrong?” he whined, standing in front of the oversized mirror in his living room.

Mizi glanced up from her phone. “Then you – and I know this is an abstract concept to you – but you apologize.”

Till glared at her through the mirror. “And what if he says something wrong?”

“You wait it out,” she replied just as easily. “I mean, he seemed nice enough at the chemistry read.” She set her phone aside, seemingly done with it for now. “He didn’t have to help you like that.”

Till felt his cheeks grow warm just remembering the kiss. In the moment, he had been able to control himself, too caught up in making sure he didn’t ruin the scene more or – worse – lose his role. But now, looking back, he couldn’t quite believe he had kissed Ivan.

It was always going to happen, Luka was right, if Ivan got the role but somehow that didn’t make it any easier to believe.

And he had gotten the role; Luka had called him this morning with the good news. After that, Till had thought about texting Ivan, congratulating him. They had exchanged numbers for a reason.

But he couldn’t quite work up the guts to do it.

He must’ve waited too long because eventually a text had popped up on his own phone from ‘Ivan’. (He had debated adding a heart before realizing that was asking for trouble.)

“Since we’ll officially be working together,” it had read, “I would like to get to know each other better.”

Till had mulled over how to respond for so long he had eventually texted Mizi instead for help. With her help, he had responded back with a simple, “How about brunch?”

He still wasn’t sure people actually used the word brunch in real life but he had trusted Mizi more than himself in the moment, and either way it worked out because Ivan said yes.

He said yes with a little :) to be precise and Till felt like his heart was going to burst. He was playing a dangerous game, he knew, letting himself feed into this when they were coworkers, nothing else, but he couldn’t help it.

And Mizi was enabling it.

After their conversation, Mizi had invited herself over to help him get ready. Fair enough, because without Hyuna he wasn’t really too sure how to do much more than throw on a shirt and jeans.

She had helped him with some basic makeup – a bit of eyeliner and gloss – then picked out his outfit for him, which he still wasn’t sure about.

It was brunch, after all, but she had picked out a long-sleeved silky blue shirt and black jeans. He felt a little overdressed but she had assured him it was perfect.

“I should get going,” she announced, tearing him out of his downward spiral. She jumped off the couch and walked over, peering in the mirror alongside him. “You look hot.”

Till snorted, shaking his head. “I used to dream of you hearing you say that.”

And it was true; when they had first met, when his career was still new and fresh, he had immediately developed a crush on her. Now, he was glad they were just friends. Now, they were so close it didn’t even feel weird joking about it.

Mizi winked playfully and patted him on the back. “Just be yourself.”

That was what he was afraid of.

Mizi left after that, which was expected – it was only an hour until Ivan was set to arrive – but being alone didn’t help his nerves at all.

Nearly exactly on the dot, Till’s doorbell rang. Old-fashioned, really, because most people just texted when they arrived.

Smoothing his shirt down in the mirror, and reminding himself this wasn’t a date, he walked over and opened the door.

Thankfully, he hadn’t been the only one to get dressed up. Ivan wore a long-sleeved black shirt, tucked neatly into dark blue slacks. His hair was swept back out of his face; if he wore makeup, it wasn’t obvious enough for Till to be able to tell but either way he was as stunning as ever.

Till realized – belatedly – that he had just been staring at him without saying anything for at least a minute. Flushing, he stepped out of the way, a silent invitation inside.

Just as he opened his mouth to say something, anything, Ivan was saying, “I almost feel bad for what I’m about to suggest,” he smiled, small, “considering how good you look.”

Till blinked once, twice. “Oh. Um. What?”

Stupid. He was so stupid.

“You obviously got dressed up intending to go out,” Ivan continued, still smiling with a hint of amusement dancing in his dark eyes, “which I know we discussed, but…”

Till swallowed; why was his mouth so dry? “But?”

“But,” Ivan tilted his head a little. “I can’t speak for you, of course, but getting recognized in public is daunting.”

Till was suddenly reminded of their differences. He’d been recognized a few times, sure, but undoubtedly nothing compared to what Ivan went through. His face was plastered everywhere – billboards, magazines, commercials – so no wonder he was tired of getting recognized everywhere he went.

Even if you didn’t know Ivan, you’d at least seen his face. And most people can’t control themselves around a celebrity, regardless of personal interest.

“I understand,” he said finally, not sure what else to say.

Ivan smiled a bit wider. “So do you mind?” Till wasn’t quite sure what he was asking, but thankfully he continued before he could make a fool of himself. “I know it must also be daunting to have a stranger in your apartment.”

The dots connected quickly, suddenly. Till didn’t even have to think about the answer. “I don’t mind at all,” he said, but then, “I just – well.” Warm in the face, he gestured weakly at his kitchen. “I don’t have much.”

“No problem,” Ivan was already pulling out his phone. “We can just order something.”

That was how they ended up on his couch, shoes thrown off, eating a pizza. It was oddly comfortable, even though Till kept catching himself staring at Ivan’s mouth.

It was hard not to remember the kiss. It had just been part of the script, albeit a little early. Not to mention, Ivan had only done it to save him from making a complete fool of himself.

But it was still hard to forget, or brush off. After all, Till had admired him (and possibly had a crush on him) for so long. He never imagined just meeting him, nevertheless anything more.

“Do I have something on my face?”

Ivan’s seemingly innocent question was what finally drew him back to reality.

Till startled, nearly dropping his slice of pizza. It was starting to get cold anyway. “Um. No. I mean. Your face is fine.”

He winced at his own words, cursing himself internally.

Ivan smiled – no, that was a smirk. “I’m glad to hear you think my face is ‘fine’.”

“Well, I mean, I didn’t – your face is more than fine,” Till stammered, even as he cursed himself more with each word.

For a moment, there was silence and Till was sure he had finally properly screwed things up. But then Ivan threw his head back and started laughing hard enough he shook the couch a little.

Once he quieted down, he gazed at Till with a crooked smile. “You’re funny.”

Till flushed. “I’m sure you hear that kind of stuff all the time.”

“Mmm,” Ivan tilted his head back and forth. “Yeah, but people are usually a lot more suave about it.” When Till frowned, he nudged him with his foot. “That’s a good thing. I prefer when people don’t try so hard.”

Till couldn’t fight back a smile even if he tried. “Oh.”

“I was gonna suggest we do a readthrough of the script tonight but,” Ivan checked his phone. “It’s getting late.”

Till tried to hide his disappointment. He was surprised how much he’d enjoyed Ivan’s company. He had hoped he would, of course, but he was never sure how these things would go. Like mentioned, he didn’t always get along with people easily. And Ivan was, well, Ivan.

Famous, beautiful, rich. Till expected him to be a lot more conceited or snobby. Most of the famous people Till met were like that, after all, but not Ivan. He was sweet. A little odd, but wasn’t everyone?

“Are you free next Friday?” Ivan asked.

Till didn’t even have to think. If he had plans, he would just have to reschedule.

“Um, probably,” he said, aiming for casual and probably failing.

Ivan smiled again; he had one fang that Till was starting to think was unfairly adorable. “We can meet, then, go over the script.”

“Sounds good.” Amazing, actually, but he didn’t dare seem too eager, even though he was starting to think Ivan wouldn’t mind.

“Soooo,” Mizi slung herself over the couch ungracefully. “How did it go, hmm?”

Till snorted, pushing her out of the way to sit down. “I – ” His smile fell. Mizi was quick to adapt, sitting up properly. She had always been good at adapting to his moods. “I think I might be screwed.”

“What?” she leaned in closer. “Did he do something?”

Till appreciated her concern, as unfounded as it was. “No, he was… he was great, actually. We ate pizza and talked about a lot of nothing. He mentioned coming over next Friday so we can actually go over the script.”

“So… what’s wrong?” She was frowning, eyebrows drawn together in confusion. He couldn’t blame her.

He sighed, peering down at his hands folded together in his lap. “I think I could really like him, Mizi. Like… a lot.”

The thing was, he had never really liked someone before. He had certainly never dated. Beyond his short-lived crush on Mizi, passionate as it was, he had never even gotten the urge to date, or even do what a lot of other actors did and sleep around casually.

And now he was worried if he spent too much time with Ivan, that might change. Turn into something more than a crush from afar.

For a long moment, they were both silent. Finally, Mizi reached for his hands, cradling them gently.

“You are a really good person, Till.”

He rolled his eyes, an automatic response. She squeezed his hands harder.

“You always undervalue yourself, Till,” she continued, and he couldn’t look away from her determined gaze. “You act overconfident to make up for it, but I know you too well for that. You don’t know think someone like Ivan could ever like you but you fail to realize he’d be lucky to have you.”

He swallowed around the sudden lump in his throat. “I – ”

But she apparently wasn’t finished, “I met with Sua.” She paused for a moment, like she was realizing something. “Ivan’s manager,” she clarified. “We really hit it off. She cares for Ivan like I care for you, I think.”

He just nodded, unsure where this was going but happy for her either way.

“I probably shouldn’t say this, it isn’t my place but,” she smiled, small, “I will, because I think you need to hear it. Apparently Ivan can’t stop talking about you. Sua said he’s never been so interested in another person. She even asked me about you.” Her smile widened a bit. “I only said good things, of course. I knew she was just worried.”

Till couldn’t believe it. He had also never known Mizi to lie, especially about serious stuff.

“But I – I can’t,” he stammered, looking down at their hands. “Even if he was interested,” which was so hard to believe he almost felt like he was dreaming, “I can’t risk it.”

Mizi ducked her head, forcing her eyes to meet again. “Why not?”

“You know why,” he said, and he wasn’t even embarrassed that he sounded like a petulant child. “I would be risking the movie. If we had a fight or – or broke up, I don’t know if I could pretend like nothing happened.”

He was making a lot of assumptions anyway; assuming Ivan was interested in something more, when maybe he just wanted something casual or temporary. But still the details didn’t matter. Either way, Till knew he couldn’t go back to acting like only coworkers.

“Till, I know you care about this movie,” she smiled again but there was something sad about the curve of her mouth, pitying. “But sometimes life is about taking chances. You can’t just depend on your career for happiness forever.”

He wanted to argue because he couldn’t find the words. Mizi squeezed his hands even tighter. It was almost painful but also oddly comforting.

“What if you got a role a few years from now – your dream role – but then suddenly you were kicked off the cast.” Till waited, knowing she wasn’t finished. “You would be devastated, obviously, but you would be even more devastated if you had to go home to an empty apartment.”

Till licked his lips; when did they get so dry?

“Plenty of people are satisfied never having a partner. Dating.”

Mizi rolled her eyes. “I know that but I also know you’re not one of them, Till.”

She really did know him too well. “But we’re both famous, Mizi, and he’s – he’s a household name. If we dated, we couldn’t keep it from the public for too long. Someone would find out.”

“And that is something worth discussing,” she finally released his hands, choosing instead to squeeze his wrist. “With him.”

Till suddenly felt like crying. He didn’t, but his eyes burned. “What if we’re wrong? Even Sua?”

“Then you can come to me and cry it out.” She smiled, warm and sincere.

It was a decent enough backup plan. Without warning, he lunged forward and hugged her. “Have I said recently how you are the best manager in the world?”

“You don’t have to tell me, I already know.”

Till decided not to rush it, even if Mizi suggested texting Ivan and setting a closer date to see each other again.

When Friday finally rolled around, he felt like he was going to be sick.

He made a point to not dress up, just a pair of his usual jeans and a black t-shirt. If this was going to happen, he wanted to be sure it was because Ivan really liked him. Not because he thought he looked good enough to settle for.

A few minutes after 12, his doorbell rang.

Brushing by the mirror without looking, he opened the door. Ivan had apparently had the same thought; he looked as gorgeous as last time, obviously, but he was wearing a white t-shirt and jeans too with a thin jacket. His hair also wasn’t slicked back, hanging loosely around his face.

He also had a bag, probably to carry around the script and whatever else he might need.

Like last time, they ordered food and ended up on the couch. This time, however, they had the scripts. Till noticed a ton of highlighted parts in Ivan’s copy; maybe he shouldn’t have assumed he just had a natural gift for memorizing things. He had obviously worked just as hard.

For a while, they just rehearsed through the easy parts. Didn’t bother acting any of the parts out just yet.

Most of that stuff – gestures, movements – would be changed before they actually started filming anyway so Till didn’t usually worry about it, just focused on the actual dialogue.

But then they flipped the page and Till saw it: the scene where they kissed. The actual scene.

For a moment, neither of them spoke. When Till finally chanced a look up, he noticed Ivan was already looking at him.

“Do you usually practice these parts?” Ivan asked.

Till tried to decipher his voice, his expression, but it was all perfectly neutral.

“Sometimes,” he answered, because it was true. “Makes it less awkward later.” But other actors preferred keeping any kissing strictly in front of the camera. Till didn’t really have a preference.

Ivan hummed thoughtfully. “Well then, I’m up for it, if you are.”

He could almost hear Mizi in his head, telling him he shouldn’t do this. He should confess, first, otherwise it wasn’t fair. To him or Ivan. And he would confess tonight. He had already made that decision but…

Couldn’t he be just a little selfish first?

“Sure.” Understatement of the century.

Collecting their scripts, Till set them aside on the coffee table and was relieved when Ivan made the first move to scoot closer. He still couldn’t quite read his face, perfectly blank.

“Let me know if you want to stop,” Ivan said, a hand already reaching out and settling on Till’s neck, warm and heavy.

Till was pretty sure Ivan could’ve done anything to him in that moment and he still wouldn’t have asked him to stop, but he appreciated the sentiment.

Not trusting his voice, Till just gave a tiny nod and that seemed to be enough for Ivan. He leaned forward, slowly, like he was giving Till the chance to stop him if he wanted to.

He didn’t.

Finally their lips touched, just a gentle press. Ivan’s lips were even softer than he remembered, warmer too. The script didn’t detail the kiss; that would be decided later with help from the director but – Till supposed Ivan was preparing for everything as he tilted his head, pressing their lips together with a bit more fervor.

Hardly complaining, Till kissed back, scooting a little closer. That should’ve been it. Given the scene, it was doubtful the kiss was going to be anything more than this.

But Ivan didn’t pull away, and Till wasn’t going to be the first to end it.

Opening his eyes, he finally wasn’t surprised for once to find Ivan already staring back at him. What was difference, however, was the look in his eyes. Intense, but somehow warm.

Till felt a shiver down his spine and decided this was it. Words had never been his specialty. Moving quickly, he shifted up onto his knees and swung a leg over Ivan to settle on the other side, kissing him the entire time.

Only once he was settled, straddling him, did he finally pull back. “Is this okay?”

Ivan’s eyes were always dark, nearly black, but this was something else. “Depends,” he replied, low but steady. He lifted his hands, placing them on Till’s hips. “Is this okay?”

Instead of replying with words, Till just leaned in and kissed him again. This kiss was immediately different from the first, filthy and almost aggressive. Ivan bit at his bottom lip, just the edge of too hard, and Till let out a sound in the back of his throat that was outright embarrassing.

He only pulled back for air when he absolutely had to, panting a little to catch his breath. Ivan’s eyes were half-lidded; he somehow looked the best he ever had. Till swallowed. This was his chance.

“I have something to confess,” he forced the words out before he could reconsider.

Ivan blinked, once, almost immediately looking more alert. “What?” His hands shifted on his hips but didn’t pull away. “Do you want to stop?”

“Quite literally the opposite,” he replied, feeling nearly delirious. This was it. “I know this is – probably not what you want at all, and I’m probably reading too much into everything, and – and I know this could get in the way of the movie, I’m not an idiot, but I think I would really regret not saying it.”

Ivan squeezed his hips, then, and it was enough to make him feel a little more grounded. “You’re kind of scaring me here, Till.”

He stared at Ivan for a moment, appreciating every detail of his face, before he took a deep breath, “I think I could end up liking you.” He paused, letting the words settle properly in the silence between them. “A lot.”

Till wasn’t sure what he was expecting. The silence lingered so long he was starting to feel an ache in his chest.

Without a word, he went to move off Ivan’s lap but his hands tightened around his waist. “Stay,” he said, the softest Till had ever heard his voice.

“You don’t have to try and – and placate me,” Till stammered, but he didn’t try to move again. “I’m not gonna be mad at you for not feeling the same way.”

Ivan opened his mouth, closed it. Till watched his face flicker through about ten different emotions before suddenly he was kissing him again, hard and messy. Till gasped into his mouth, surprised – confused – but hardly disappointed.

He curled his fingers in Ivan’s hair, eyelashes fluttering. He could do this forever. He also knew he needed a real answer.

He deserved that.

Mustering all his courage, he pulled back. Ivan stared up at him with a newfound intensity. He forced himself to speak around the lump in his throat, “I’ve admired you for a long time. I know that might not be – appealing, in this context. But I don’t think that has anything to do with what I’ve felt since we met.”

Ivan continued to stare at him. Till gulped.

“You’re just not what I expected,” he paused. “In a really good way, and I’ve never done this before. Not just with another actor. Or, uh, coworker. I mean, like at all.”

The corner of Ivan’s mouth started to quirk up. “You’re cute.”

“Oh.” Till flushed. “Thank you?”

Ivan let out a soft laugh; gently, he moved Till off him. Under different circumstances, he might’ve overthought what that meant but Ivan was still smiling, warm and small.

“Are you asking me out, Till?” he asked, not even trying to hide the mirth in his eyes.

He supposed he was, in a way. “I mean, that’s – that’s assuming a lot. I just, I wanted to let you know. I didn’t – ” He hadn’t expected anything, he meant to say, but he suddenly stopped, finally connecting the dots. “Wait. Does that mean – ?”

Ivan leaned against the back of the couch, watching him with that same sparkle in his eyes. “I liked you the second I set my eyes on you,” the confession felt like igniting fire in Till’s very core. “I wasn’t sure why, at first. I’d never felt that way before, and we barely knew each other.”

Till didn’t dare speak; he didn’t trust his voice anyway.

“But you’re… different,” Ivan hummed. “I can’t quite put my finger on it.” He smiled, that fang poking out again. Till wanted to feel it against his lip again. “And frankly, I don’t really care to.”

He paused, reaching out. Till didn’t even think twice, moving as if commanded by something out of his control. Ivan held his hand gently, thumb pressing into his knuckles, not hard but comforting. Grounding, like he somehow knew Till felt a little untethered.

“But I’m assuming you know by now I can’t promise you this won’t get out. Even when you’re surrounded by people you think you can trust, it’s not quite true in our line of work, is it?”

Till had already went over this in his head. “I don’t mind. I think it’s worth the risk.”

“We should at least keep it between us,” Ivan said softly, and Till wasn’t sure yet what he was going to say next. If he wanted to keep this hidden because he was ashamed or embarrassed to be seen with him. But then – “Just until the movie is done shooting. I don’t want them to project or assume anything just because we’re together.”

Till nodded. “I agree,” he said, meaning it. It was the smart move. “And if anything happens, if this doesn’t work, I need us to be on the same page.”

“I hope we won’t have to worry about that,” Ivan replied, “but the fact you even want to discuss it...” He smiled again, almost approvingly. Till didn’t want to admit how much that did for his confidence. “I promise you won’t have anything to worry about from my end. I could even give you something to use against me, if it would give you peace of mind.”

Till let out a sudden laugh, surprised by the odd offer. But just as Ivan kept saying he was different, he was starting to think Ivan’s oddness was what had really captivated him. “I’ll just have to take your word for it,” he said, still smiling.

They never ended up having to worry about. Months later, when the movie was wrapping up, they all celebrated by having dinner at Ivan’s house. The place had always been beautiful, from the very first time Till had seen it, but now it felt more like a proper home.

Pictures lined the walls that used to be empty, mostly of the two of them, but some were just of Till. He complained about them, sometimes, embarrassed but secretly he liked it.

Some were of all of them – Ivan, arms wrapped around Till. Mizi and Sua, heads tilted together.

Till was pretty sure he had died and gone to heaven. Or maybe he just should’ve been more hopeful when he was younger because sometimes he still struggled to believe this was real.

Sitting at the table, Ivan on his left and Mizi on his right, he wondered what he had done to end up lucky enough to have met both of them.

Or maybe Ivan was right, as he always liked to say: “You deserve good things, Till.”

Till still remembered the first time he’d said it when they were laid out in his bed. He had kissed Till’s forehead and he had suddenly felt the urge to cry, eyes burning.

Maybe, just maybe, he was finally starting to believe it.

“Can you believe they still haven’t figured it out?” Mizi was saying, giggling around the rim of her wine glass. “’How is their chemistry so good?’” she said, repeating what the director had said earlier.

Till hadn’t really heard him. He’d been too busy kissing Ivan with as much fervor as he kissed him every night. He supposed there were benefits, actually, to dating your costar.

Sua smiled at her side. “You can’t blame him. I’m surprised they were actually able to keep it hidden until the end of filming.”

Till chanced a glance at Ivan, who was already staring back at him. He smiled. Ivan smiled back, giving a nod.

“About that, actually,” Till cleared his throat. “We are planning to disclose that we’re dating. Not how long, obviously, but… we thought it might make things easier, especially since Ivan can’t stop complaining about wanting to take me places and not being able to.”

Mizi smiled, shifting to take Sua’s hand where it was resting atop the table.

“We’re happy for you.” She glanced at Ivan. “Both of you.”

At the end of the night, Till was surprised to have Mizi pull him away from Ivan’s side. She walked them to the edge of the porch, grasping his hands tightly in her own.

“I know this is going to be cheesy and you’ll hate every second of it,” she said, “but I just really need to say it.”

Till tilted his head with a confused smile.

“I used to worry about you.” She squeezed his hands tighter. “You always acted like you were fine on your own but I just – I could tell you had so much love to give and for a while I almost felt guilty, turning you down.”

Till tensed, already opening his mouth, but she continued, “I know you never wanted me to, and you never did anything to make me feel that. I promise. It was just – normal concern for a friend, okay?”

She gently shook their hands, smiling now. “But now I see you with Ivan and… Till, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so happy.”

He couldn’t fight the smile off his own face, small and sincere. He stared down at their hands. “I – ” He paused, swallowed around the lump in his throat. He hadn’t even said this to Ivan, yet, but somehow it felt right. Saying it, now, to Mizi first. “I think I love him.”

For a long moment, there was silence. When he finally glanced up, Mizi wasn’t looking at him. She was staring over his shoulder, eyes a little wide, and –

He dropped her hands and spun around. Ivan stood there, frozen with his hand in the air like he had just been about to tap his shoulder. Mizi squeaked and scooted past them, rushing to join Sua at the other end of the porch.

“I was going to ask if you were cold,” Ivan said, dropping his hand. It was chilly out, middle of autumn now, and Ivan knew he ran cold. The simple but sweet gesture made his heart feel like it was going to burst out of his chest.

Till just nodded, not trusting his voice. Ivan shucked off his jacket and moved to wrap it around his frame.

“I didn’t want you hear that,” Till said finally, clutching the jacket to keep it from falling. “I was going to tell you soon. Just needed the right moment. I know it’s probably too soon or I don’t know, I don’t really know how to gauge these things – ”

Ivan moved, smooth but fast, wrapping an arm around his waist and drawing him in close enough to tip their foreheads together. If he remembered they still had company present, he didn’t seem phased by it. “I don’t believe in there being a right time for anything,” he breathed softly. “I love you, Till.”

He smiled so big he knew his cheeks were going to hurt later. He didn’t care. Happiness was worth it. “Good,” he said before cupping both sides of Ivan’s face and kissing him.

It reminded him a lot of their first kiss but this time the roles were reversed. Ivan seemed surprised for just a second before he smiled against his lips, tugging him even closer.

When they separated, Till was breathless. He wasn’t complaining.

“I hate to say this,” he let out a shaky laugh, still catching his breath, “but I think we need to send a thank you card or something.”

Ivan raised an eyebrow, searching his face. “To who?”

“I’ll tell you later,” he replied before moving in to kiss him again. He heard Sua’s groan from across the porch. Ivan laughed against his mouth.

A week before they left for their first vacation, just a couple days after the news of them dating had hit the media, Till went to the store and picked out a card. It was the vaguest card he could find in the store, just a simple “thank you” with a smiley face on the front. He signed it just as simply – Ivan and Till – and left it like that. He trusted Luka to figure it out.

#alnst #ivantill #alien stage #alnst ivan #alnst till #ivantill fic #mywriting

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thorntopieces · 13 days

Text

assorted pjo/hoo headcanons

autistic!will. i mean. i was one of the first people to write it (and post it on ao3, but i had stuff about it on my long gone old blog before then). this is true. to me. it's not incredibly obvious unless you know what you're looking for because 99% of the time he's eloquent and very passionate and maybe it's just the hyper healer in him and he'd like to think he passes well. but for people who know they can just tell. it's the voice, man /gn. gives you away every time /lh

pots!hazel. she ends up (mostly!) recovering from the fainting episodes associated with her flashbacks but still faints and feels unwell a lot of the time. she spends a lot of her energy and magic on staying conscious and aware, leaving her foggy and with flare-ups. will ends up diagnosing her half-way on accident during the three days nico stays in the infirmary. she doesn't faint a lot, but she will frequently have her vision black out when she stands and feel nauseous if she has to stand still for more than ten minutes (more or less depending on the day). together with jason and nico the three of them make up the fainting trio

reyna speaks excessively formally and politely when she's uncomfortable and the moment she feels safe around you she will just loosen up completely. it becomes very clear very quickly how much of her time is spent being uncomfortable

genderfluid!lou ellen. most of the time she's happy to be referred to as a girl, but some days it just feels wrong and she prefers to be referred to either gender-neutrally or masculinely. it's not something she's out about to anyone but her closest friends, partially because there's kind of enough stigma around being the child of hecate and also, it's not all that obvious, even to her.

nico is a bit like a social interaction vampire. he's not as shut off as others seem to think, he just needs to be given explicit permission to talk about his interests because he's worried about annoying other people, especially after bianca essentially abandoned him. he could talk for hours and hours about his special interests (because yes, he's probably autistic too) like mythomagic (he picks it up again with percy's encouragement), ancient languages and literature

will and katie (gardner) friendship. they bond over liking star wars and when lou ellen join their circle she manipulates the mist to recreate scenes from the movies. as she gets better at it she manages to make the light sabers glow, much to will and katie's delight

after the battle of manhattan and will/kayla/austin almost dying from being overworked, the camp gets together with mr d and chiron without the apollo kids' knowledge and figure out how to run the infirmary in a more sustainable way than just forcing apollo and athena kids to be there. eventually they settle on apollo kids doing 8-hour shifts but none at night unless someone is severely wounded. for the night shift, other campers work in rotating pairs where one sleeps for the first four hours and the other for the last four hours. a lot more campers gain appreciation for the amount of work the apollo (and athena) cabin put in to keep them alive and healthy and the apollo cabin doesn't die of burnout

t1 diabetic!kayla. she's been sick with it since she was six, but thanks to having a very supportive dad and a team of professionals around him considering his status as an olympic archer, her condition is well-managed (most of the time, war time is unpredictable) and she knows how to treat and manage it considering her demigod lifestyle. accompanying headcanon to this: while ambrosia and nectar is mostly to heal injuries and wounds of a divine and/or serious nature, it can short-term manage blood sugar. mortal intervention is always needed to fix the problem though. a bit like how narcan delays but can't entirely fix an opioid overdose

cecil wasn't properly accepted as a child of hermes at first considering he didn't express exceptional skills at the more obvious and everyday traits associated with the cabin (multilingualism, athleticism, thievery). first when he was found to accidentally being an exceptional saboteur was he properly accepted by the rest of his siblings. due to this he tended to hang out with the unclaimed children in the hermes cabin rather than his own siblings, especially lou ellen

hjs!cecil (hypermobile joint syndrome; double-jointedness). he's not good with most physical activities because of this and easily discouraged to even attempt most sports due to how his cabin alienated him for not being exceptionally agile, a trait associated with their cabin. it's not uncommon for his wrists and ankles to not work well (such as the twisted ankle in boo). however, he feels like he "compensates" for this by working in the shadows. when properly encouraged and supported, he prefers fighting with knives (close combat or throwing), relying on being obnoxious to throw the enemy off

#pjo #hoo #will solace #hazel levesque #lou ellen blackstone #nico di angelo #katie gardner #kayla knowles #cecil markowitz #my headcanons #i have not posted headcanon lists in like what *seven years* i feel old now but here i have some thoughts #they're random but they're true to me #<- says this but will accept even contradictory headcanons because it's more fun that way #disclaimer that i havent read most of toa yet but i know what happens because idc about spoilers #pjo tag

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multifandom-nerds-blog · 5 months

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More thoughts on Kai stuck in the never space : (possible AU)

I'm no definitely stuck on the idea that time passes differently there. Ergo, he's been there for a few years, at minimum a decade when finally does get out again at some point

There isn't really lots of common food there (The banished five don't need food to survive in my opinion) so he got used to eating anything eadible. So moss, insects, whatever he can find really

Bonzle is also sharing some of her magical energy with him, so it's easier for him to survive without much food or water. You can imagine it as Kai carrying one of her eyes on a necklace like a blue orb.

Since Bonzle also doesn't have a need for sleep like Kai does, she usually covers guard duty. Without her Kai would probably barely sleep at all (he already does)

At one point Kai ends up picking up magic. Though I'm not sure how exactly yet, he probably goes by gut feeling and a combination of things that Bonzle knows and his experiences with magic users.

Inside the neverspace, there are some other creatures as well. Mostly of magical/mystical nature. Now or then Kai either fights them for practicing magic, or even hunts them for food. (Safe to say, eating magical creatures has some effects on his body as well.)

He then combines his elemental fire with his magic, and through that gets a more flexible fighting style. This definitely helps as he's basically trying to hunt down the other forbidden five inside the neverspace

Bonzle obviously tries to stop him but Kai is to stubborn so she ends up following him anyways to pull him out if a situation gets to dangerous

Kai and Bonzle definitely form a sort of codependency

Bonzle at some point also told Kai about an agent walker she met right before the blood moon, and he figured out the rest

About his looks

You can imagine it, but his clothes are pretty thrown together after so many years, with scraps he can find somehow. His main red is still but barely present after time, but he ends up combining the colors of the other ninja in to remember them better. (When you use magical energy needed for your survival to dye your clothes in other colors.)

His hair grows out, and when it's open Kai pretty much looks like his mom. Most of the time however it's braided with on of Nyas hair ties he still had in his pockets. At one point he also ripped up his ninja mask for some bandaids, and is using the rest of it now as a bandana

He also gets several new scars, be it from experemening with magic, or fights with either the remaining forbidden or other creatures existing in the never space.

That's it for now. I don't wanna put to much stuff in one post, but please tell me if you want more or have ideas foe your own. I also still don't have a proper name idea for this AU/canon divergence, unless I'm somehow predicting s2 part 2 but that would be wild.

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is-today-tomorrow-in-nz · 3 months

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The Many pitfalls of Grishaverse - Part 1

The Grishaverse had a very interesting premise but as we delve deeper into the trilogy and later the duology we see that it just stops there. There are no laws and limitations clearly mapped out to make the universe work. Everything is pretty much left up to the interpretation of the readers who has to piece together the information scattered throughout the books only to find out that they contradict a lot. This totally disrupts the immersive experience of the readers who are left scratching their heads because the premise no longer makes sense.

Let me share my analysis.

The Undefined Magic System:

Brandon Sanderson lays out three rules for creating a cohesive magic system. (a)An author's ability to solve conflict with magic is directly proportional to how well the reader understands said magic. (b) Weaknesses, limits and costs are more interesting than powers. (c)The author should expand on what is already a part of the magic system before something entirely new is added, as this may otherwise entirely change how the magic system fits into the fictional world.

The magic in Grishaverse exists for the sake of existing.

The source of the power is called the Making but the rules and laws of it is not called out. The book vaguely says that the Grisha powers are something as integral as breathing and a Grisha who does not use it dies. And yet somehow, when something so inherent is stripped away from Alina, she continues to live without falling into sickness. It tells Grisha magic has limitations but somehow, it is used as band-aid to fix any major catastrophes within the universe. They entire magic system is conflicting and contradicting.

We do not know the abilities and the limitations of the other Grisha powers either. Eg: How high can a Tidemaker create a wave? can a squaller perfect a storm? why corporalki need their targets to be within their line of vision? Why do they need their hands for summoning? How does a Fabrikator operate?

None of these are clearly outlined. Instead, the books simply make vague claims that Tidemakers calm the seas and waves, heartrenders are put in one-way mirror cells so they cannot attack, Fabrikators create crafts which seems do not make sense in the 19th century. Do they conjure up weaponry in their sleep? So many questions and receive very little answers and vague statements.

Then there is this vague concept of merzost which seem to randomly pick the author's favourites and leave them with a slap on the wrist while her unfavourites are literally put through hell. Alina's power were stripped away for being against the law, Zoya's was raised to sainthood and Aleksander's was called corrupt.

Even if the Grisha magic is akin to molecular chemistry, understanding something and applying it are very different things. If that wasn't the case, then Grisha would be the powerful entities in that universe. And yet somehow they are victims of genocide.

Without actually establishing any of the above the author goes on the introduce 'parem' which makes the magic system even more chaotic. Why does the parem affect the Grisha that way? Why do they become addictive? Why does the parem allow the Grisha to conjure up something that can only be done via merzost. So simply a drug is all that is needed to create merzost level damage? Then if the addictive qualities are removed then parem can be used instead of amplifiers and merzost?

This unclear magic system, makes the world of Grishaverse constricted rather than making us believe in its vastness. It further weakens the plot, as the magic or rather science of the Grisha is the reason why conflicts exists within the said universe.

So LB created a magic system which is chaotic, conflicting, constricting and exists only to do the bidding of the author and not the story.

#grisha critical #grishaverse trilogy #grishaverse #grishanalyticritical #lb critical #anti leigh bardugo #the darkling #pro aleksander morozova #pro darkling

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zhaliacain · 20 days

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I have acquired this!

Well this is now my new favourite book. It essentially tells the story of season one with some outtakes and adaptions. Unfortunately some of my favourite episodes and scenes have been redacted but to be fair they had a lot to cover

So far I’ve only read it through google translate (using the camera to read the pages which my brother thinks is witchcraft) so I don’t have an accurate read yet but at some point I’ll sit down and translate it properly so I can read the whole thing at once rather than in batches (curse the shaky hands)

Here’s some of may favourite features I’ve found in my rough reading, I’ll put it under read more because there’s some stuff that either doesn’t line up with the canon or I suppose is a spoiler for some headcanons

A) Otto (Addo) is alive! During the final party after defeating the Professor it’s revealed that Guggenheim managed to get him back from the organisation and he is also there at the party. Zhalia is very relieved to see him and they catch up

B) Zhalia got a leg injury in the final battle, hence leaning on Dante

C) Defoe. During Dante and Griers fight on Sutos, Dante brings up Defoe and is told “the organisation got rid of him” take that as you will

D) you know that conversation Dante and Zhalia are having in the background of Lok and Sophie’s chat after defeating Madea? They’re arguing because Zhalia wants to bond with Madea and Dante won’t let her. I just found that interesting because I thought Zhalia wouldn’t want the Titan that brought up all her past trauma

D.1) little side note, to speed things up, Zhalia defeats Madea all by herself

E) after finding out Dante was NOT mind controlled and her thoughtspectre had worked, Zhalia wanted to hug Dante but didn’t

F) Sophie has keys to Dante’s house (kind of obvious considering they’re there alone all the time but it’s a nice feature)

G) tersely and Montehue give Lok a rare book of Norse mythology as a gift after defeating the professor

H) Montehue hugs everyone during the party and hugs Lok so hard, Dante has to step in

I) Dante describes Zhalia as beautiful

J) I need to check my translation but I think Zhalia’s parents were killed

K) Zhalia: tell me you aren’t lying to save yourself

Dante: I have never lied to you and I never will

Zhalia: klaus is like a father to me, I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it

Dante: I’ll take care of it

L) “a meal worthy of metagolem” is how I’ll be complimenting food from now on

M) rather than all of them touching the crystals to see if they’re pure of heart, just Lok does it and he gets an electric sensation go through his chest

N) to celebrate the whole Thor and mjolnjr thing, Guggenheim takes everyone out to dinner

O) lok was sleeping on Dante’s sofa without permission, he just kind of moved in and Dante gave up

P) Defoe was meant to take the sword of St George to Klaus, who would study it and take it to the professor

Q) oh that whole speech about going to Vienna where Dante changes his mind and takes the team? Nope he just says no and walks out and Leblanche spends the next few days baking treats to cheer them up

R) Loks cover story for his mum and sister was going to be: Sophie is a classmate on the same intensive archeology summer course as him and Dante and Zhalia are assistants to their elderly professor who is sick which is why they’re getting a holiday (the book then skips that episode and it’s unclear whether they didn’t go or whether it’s just not mentioned)

S) Lok asks why Sutos is not under the Greek government and the holotome tells them that it’s a regent based government which is inherited to the first born son

T: Zhalia: klaus taught me everything

Dante: except honesty

(Slightly paraphrased but it just cracks me up)

U) much like most fanfiction, Cherit is forgotten throughout most of it and occasionally gets mentioned

V) Lok: how did you do it?

Sophie: magic.

#huntik #zhalia moon #dante vale #lok lambert #sophie casterwill #huntik secrets and seekers #zhante

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cozage · 1 year

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The Daughter's Return: Part 3

Chapter 4: Doctor's Visit

Start From Beginning | Next Chapter | Table of Contents | Read on AO3

Characters: female reader x Portgas D. Ace Word Count: 2.2k

As soon as the doors to the clinic were open, Ace was dragging you inside. He even wore a shirt without you having to remind you. He was that desperate to get you in.

You couldn’t blame him. Neither of you had gotten much sleep. When you finally managed to doze off, you were haunted by horrific dreams. It was almost better to be awake and sleep deprived. But when you were awake, you were also nauseous. Both states of being were about equally as miserable.

Ace hadn’t slept well either. You knew he was anxious to be on an island. He wanted to be out at sea, chasing down Teach. And you couldn’t blame him. Justice had to be dealt and you were keeping him tied down, waiting for the clinic to open their doors.

The doctor took you quickly, though they made Ace wait in the lobby. It made you nervous to be separated from him, but it would be easier to talk about your actual concerns this way.

You gave a false name and age to the worker, not wanting your records to be found by anyone. Then they took your weight and blood pressure, which they noted was a bit high. That would be reason for concern, if you weren’t in the process of tracking down your uncle’s killer.

“My name is Ali,” the young nurse said. “What brings you in today.?”

“Quite frankly,” you tried to swallow the lump in your throat. “I think I’m pregnant.”

“Oh!” Ali said, her eyes widening in shock.

“The guy out in the lobby doesn’t know yet. I just wanted to get a test to be certain before I told him.”

“Of course.” Ali nodded and began writing some information down on her sheet. “I’ll order some labs for you, and take some blood. Should I bring him back or leave him out there?”

You sighed in relief. This girl really was a godsend. She knew exactly what you needed.

“Can you bring him back?” you asked. “That would be great.”

She went and gathered Ace, who you referred to as Axel in front of the staff, and then began to prepare for a blood sample. As she tried to take your blood, you realized you had forgotten to give her very important information.

“Oh!” You pulled away from the incoming needle, startling the nurse. “I’m sorry, I just forgot to tell you- I have a devil fruit power. Logia type.”

“Oh dear,” Ali said, quickly pulling away her needle. “I totally forgot to ask you that question as a part of the screening. Here-” she handed you a bracelet that had green stone and an adjustable leather cord. “If you’ll just put that on, we can get started.”

When you put it on, you hardly felt different. You felt a little more solid than you usually did, but that was about it.

“What is this?” you asked, examining the bracelet around your wrist.

“Sea prism,” the nurse said. You felt Ace stiffen beside you. Sea prism usually meant bad things for pirates, but you trusted this woman.

“It’s an extremely weakened version of it, so it just negates your abilities without physically weakening you. You’ll need it if-” she paused, her eyes flitting over to Ace. “Well, we can talk about the uses for it later.”

She easily stuck the needle in and drew out a few vials of blood, and then sent them off to the lab. “We’ll have results in about ten to twenty minutes. Just hang tight, okay?”

You gave her a tense smile. “Thanks.”

Ace looked pale and sick. You couldn’t blame him. Usually when people were this kind, it was a trap. Every bone in your body was telling you to flee. But you couldn’t run away this time. You had to wait for the results.

“Are you going to die?” Ace whispered. “I know I said you could go first, but I didn’t mean this soon.”

“I’m not going to die, Ace,” you said. “Let’s just wait for the results, okay?”

You didn’t have to wait long, thankfully. Ali had worked some kind of laboratory magic, and came back in less than ten minutes.

When the door opened, Ace’s hand interlaced in yours and he held onto it tightly, as if you were his only anchor for survival.

Ali gave you a big grin as she shut the door, looking at the two of you with pure joy on her face. “I believe some congratulations are in order!”

“Congratulations?” Ace asked, confusion written all over his face.

You wanted to puke. You were right. And now Ace was about to find out.

“All of the bloodwork came back normal,” Ali confirmed. “Except for the pregnancy test. That came back positive.”

You gripped Ace’s hand tighter than you thought possible, but Ace was still processing her words.

“Pregnancy test?” He looked at you, his eyes wide with fear. “You’re pregnant?”

“It looks like she’s about done with her first trimester!” Ali squeaked, her excitement palpable in the room. You wished you could feel the same.

“Ali-” you cleared your throat, trying to maintain your composure. “Can we have a minute?”

“Oh!” Ali’s face flushed with pink. “Of course. Let me give you some privacy to talk about this, and then we can go over everything you need to know.”

Ace was still staring at you, unbelieving and unaccepting. You flinched slightly as the door shut, waiting for Ace to say something. Anything.

“How long?” Ace demanded. “How long have you known?”

“Last night,” you admitted. “The no-moon made me realize.”

“We were so careful!”

You sighed. “The onsen.”

Ace’s eyes got wide. “Fuck,” he hissed. “I forgot about that.”

“I swear I didn’t know before last night,” you promised.

“I believe you,” Ace said. “You were too stubborn about that no-moon.”

You gave a nervous laugh that quickly died, leaving the room wrapped in an eerie silence.

“What do we do?” you whispered, tears filling your eyes. Now that it was real, it all felt so scary.

“What do you mean? We’re having a baby!” Ace laughed, a toothy smile emerging from his previously concerned face. “I thought you were dying, but this is great news in comparison!”

“But-” you paused to wipe away your tears. “You said you didn’t want kids.”

He put a hand atop your stomach, staring down at where your child was growing. “I changed my mind.”

“You changed your mind?”

“Yep.” He gave another soft smile, staring at your stomach with complete love and infatuation. “We’re gonna be better parents than even Pops. Think we can do that?”

You laughed, choking out a sob as well. “I thought you said pirates-”

He cut your words off with his lips; a kiss that was long and deep, and all of your doubt was instantly replaced with love.

He finally pulled away from your lips, pressing his forehead against yours. “We’ll figure it out, okay?”

You gave him a tearful smile and nodded in agreement. “Okay,” you whispered.

“I really thought you were going to die,” Ace whispered. “This is nothing compared to that.”

Ace couldn’t stop staring at your belly, that goofy grin still widespread across his face. He was still staring when Ali knocked on the door a few minutes later, and came back in.

“How are we feeling?” she asked, her eyes glancing between you and Ace.

“Great!” Ace was cheerful and enthusiastic as he spoke to Ali, but he kept his hand protectively over you.

“Awesome!” Ali said, turning back to you. “There’s a lot of information we need to go over, but the most important is that bracelet. It’s yours now. Keep it on unless you need to use your devil fruit powers.”

“Wait, what? Why?” you asked, looking at the sea prism bracelet.

“Logia users are at the highest risk of a failed pregnancy. Your body goes through extreme changes and isn’t even always solid sometimes. You may be able to handle those changes like it’s nothing, but a baby can’t.

“We recommend you keep your ability usage down to around 15 minutes over an hour span between months two through four. I’m guessing your body has been having some weird reactions over the past few weeks? The pregnancy would be the reason for it. Keeping that bracelet on should help negate those adverse effects, as well as clear up any major nausea and major sickness you’ve been having.”

“Wow,” you whispered. “I had no idea. That makes so much sense.”

“Between months five and nine,” Ali continued on, handing Ace a pamphlet. “We recommend no ability usage at all unless absolutely imperative circumstances. It’s very dangerous to the baby for the mother to use powers during that time. That bracelet will be your absolute best friend over the next few months. I hope you like green!”

You gave a light laugh as you continued to stare at the bracelet, but you could feel dread bubbling up inside you. If you couldn’t use your powers, you weren’t sure how much help you would be at any time over the next few months, for Ace or for your family.

“I’m sure you’re worried about losing the bracelet,” Ali said, misunderstanding your unease. “We’ll give you a bag with two more in it, just in case one breaks or gets lost. And you can always come back to this clinic or any clinic on the Grand Line, most of them have a form of this in stock.”

“What about the baby?” Ace asked. “You said months two through four she should only be using her devil fruit powers 15 minutes an hour, but we’re on month three. Is there anything to be worried about?”

“We’ll do a routine checkup,” Ali said, turning to look at you. “But months two through four are more for the mother's sake. Preparing you to not be reliant on your powers as well as keeping the sickness at bay.”

You gave a nod, but your hand reached out to find Ace’s again. This was too much information. There was no way you would remember it all. He gripped your hand reassuringly, giving you an encouraging squeeze every now and then as Ali rambled through more specific deatils.

She went over hundreds of other pieces of information, each thing coming with its own pamphlet or handout. Where to get checkups, how to get proper nutrition, things to look out for and things that were completely normal. It was overwhelming, and by the end of it, your head was spinning.

The two of you walked out of the clinic, hands full of vitamins, appointment schedules, and the results of a healthy baby. It felt like an eternity ago that Thatch had died, and you wanted to cry remembering he was gone. How had you already forgotten so quickly?

As you and Ace walked back to the boat, you passed a board full of bounty posters.

“Hey!” Ace called you back to the board. “Our bounties went up.”

You scowled. “We didn’t even do anything!”

He gave you a wicked grin. “They probably assumed the masterminds were involved in the embargo Thatch did the other week.”

His face fell at the mention of his fellow commander. It was clear that he had forgotten too. You walked back to the board, trying not to think about it too hard. Now was not the time for sadness. It was time for revenge.

“What are they now?” You scanned the board, looking for your bounty poster. Both you and Ace had gotten updated photos after the Marine Ball incident, and it took a second to find them.

“You’re at 550 million!?” you whispered, thoroughly impressed. Six months ago he hadn’t even been at a million, and now he was over halfway to a billion.

“And you’re 790 million,” Ace smirked, nudging you playfully. “Look at you go.”

You rolled your eyes. “The Navy only sees Newgate.”

Ace pulled down your poster and shoved it in his pocket, and he stared at the board again, his mouth hanging wide open.

“What?” you asked, looking where your poster had been.

A straw hat. Not just any straw hat. Uncle Red’s old straw hat. The one he had promised to you years and years ago.

“Hey!” you shouted. “I know that hat!”

“You know that hat?” Ace yelled back, his enthusiasm growing. “I know that kid! That’s Luffy!”

“Luffy?!” You looked back at the poster. Monkey D. Luffy. Ace’s little brother.

You looked at him. “You’re telling me that your little brother stole my hat? Your family just keeps stealing all the stuff that was promised to me!”

He laughed at your joke, and you found yourself laughing along too. It had been a long time since you had thought about your promised position in a bitter way, and an even longer time since you had thought about that hat.

“We should go see him,” Ace offered wistfully. “I was browsing the papers while you were with the nurse. Sounds like Teach was heading back to Paradise to form a crew.”

“Man, it’s been forever since I’ve been to Paradise.” You pulled down Luffy’s bounty poster, examining it as you walked. “You know Luffy already has a higher bounty than you did a few months ago, right?”

Ace groaned and shook his head. “The Navy is different with rookies now than they used to be. They don’t underestimate them anymore.”

“Or maybe he’s just stronger,” you said, sending him a cheesy grin as he rolled his eyes.

“Come on.” He snatched Luffy’s poster out of your hand, but gingerly folded it up and placed it in his pocket. “We’ve got a pirate to find.”

Tag list! @taeyoge @teiza @tojislawyer @trafalgardnami @bloopbopsblog @dancingnewcat @dxestyi @flooofity @nyxthedragon01 @deadsnothere @h-rhodes1598 @morgyyyyyyy @trafalgardvivi @fiestynatureweeb @frogpogjoghurt @beepboopcowboy @ms-portgas @luvyallbabes @appalost @zuchkaa @saybeyonce @stray-npc @kitsunechan707 @theyluvmesblog @heartysworld @aira-needs-sleep

(if you'd like to be included in the tag list, just comment or send me a message!)

#one piece #one piece imagine #one piece scenario #one piece x reader #one piece x you #portgas ace x you #portgas ace x reader #portgas d ace x reader #ace x y/n #ace x reader #portgas d ace #portgas d. ace #cozage #✧˚ace✧˚

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