#either way im eating this shit up
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Someone said hunter D-90 from the Loki series is a variant of Johnny Soap Mactavish who got his memories erased and i-
#i can't omg#the angst potential of it#cod#cod mwii#johnny soap mactavish#ghoap#call of duty#cod mw#ghoap angst fic??#either way im eating this shit up#loki#hunter d-90#mcu
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do you consider your self made?
#my art#self portrait of sorts#been musing a lot on disability recently and how being relatively freshly unable to do Most Things has changed my perspective on things#for a long time growing up i was fixated on the idea of being An Impact On The World yknow? mainly the next Big Writer#(and that it would be sooo impressive that everyone would make my books bestsellers when i was only 12 because it was That Good)#and i mean. obviously that didnt work out as originally planned because i was 12 and learning. but I've felt a lot like#I've kind of built my sense of self on those big achievements. even if they were only big to me. and a lot of them#are now out of reach or very difficult to reach. and it's been a lot to. recontextualize#to take what ive been told my whole life and ignore it in favor of just being being enough.#things will happen as they happen. i havent earned anything by suffering but it hasnt ended the world either#im here doing what i Can do for as long as I'm able to do it. and thats all i need to be for now#just making sure that i Do do the things i can do rather than assume i can do them later#anyways. love you#cw:#top nudity#artistic nudity#the dreaded ambiguously presenting nipple#if you put any pro weight loss eating disorder shit on here ill kill you btw#my body is sexy because im in it and im still alive. not because its struggling to stay that way#lindwormposting
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you can always tell when someone doesn't have maga men in their life and god it makes me angry.. "if you're nice and compassionate you can be the one woman that makes them realize women aren't mean!" my mom bent over backwards for my dad for 25 fucking years he has plenty of other women kissing his ass and it never changed anything. do you really think that before being radicalized they never knew a single kind woman? they were never friends with a nice girl? alt-right men's problem with women isn't just that they've experienced too many mean women and they need to be shown that women can be nice, it's that they think women are inferior and don't deserve rights and don't understand anything so you can do what you want with them. and it takes a lot more than being nice to show someone that you aren't inferior. this isn't a case of being nice even when it's hard for the sake of deradicalization, it's about spending every fucking interaction with someone trying to get them to see you as a human being with value and a functioning intellect while they just laugh and show you that's never going to happen.
i cannot stress this enough: random women are not just going out and Being Mean to men. ur average guy interacts with plenty of women throughout his life- close women amongst their friends and family, casual interactions etc. most people don't start out being shunned by women, they start out being treated as NORMAL. & when they show their disrespect in normal society, it isn't tolerated, but when they go to alt-right spaces (which they're pushed towards online) they're told they're allowed to be as horrible as they want with no consequences because they're entitled to everything. it isn't "women aren't welcoming and the alt-right is so friendly so i'll become alt-right," it's "women don't let me disrespect them and the alt-right tells me fuck them, do whatever you want, you're entitled to it all" and why would you choose the group where you have to be a normal accountable person when there's a group that will reward you for being a shithead who gives no fucks?
the alt-right can afford to be more friendly and welcoming because they can allow bigotry. this can't work the same way for progressive spaces because we can be as kind & welcoming as possible but at the end of the day we have lines where we have to say "this behavior/speech isn't allowed in this space," and for certain people, that just can't win against a space where you can be as nasty as you want. these posts always end with a disclaimer saying "of course being kind doesnt mean you need to tolerate their bigotries" but what they don't realize and what drives me crazy is that women not tolerating bigotry IS the "women are mean" that radicalized them in the first place. they perceive you pushing back on any bigotry or bullshit as you being a meanie and treating them like they're ontologically evil. the 'kindness' they need to be deradicalized is you letting them walk all over you.
idk what the answer is to deradicalizing them and im sure relationships are part of it but you can be as kind as you want and all it will do is destroy you ime. i cant stand to see people (who have never even successfully deradicalized any man by being nice btw they always speak in hypotheticals and not from experience) double down on telling women to do things that will see no results and only hurt them, especially when any woman who has tried can tell you exactly how it went
#being as nasty as possible & shitting on everyone while giving no fucks makes you popular in certain spaces. that's tempting no matter what#to immature ppl. part of growing up is learning that you cant do that and real relationships need you to not do that#but that sucks. you could just ignore it and join the alt-right to be a manchild forever#if ur an asshole who wld u wanna hang out with: ur wife who says please dont be an asshole to me or ur bros who say she's a hysterical bitc#& u did nothing wrong?#if u had a maga dad/brother/uncle & u heard the way they talk about women its never abt being mean lol#it's abt how women are hysterical & sensitive & get upset at everything they do#im so sorry but a normal guy (i know & am friends with many) doesnt simply become an MRA because his girl friends made 1 men suck joke#if a guy truly has no fulfilling friendships with women or girls to the point where some feminist group 'being too mean' can radicalize him#bc he doesnt have any kind women in his life to prove that wrong. he already had issues.#you reach a certain point in your friendship with these guys where youve been SO kind and so supportive and welcoming and played therapist#for ages and then they turn around and say 'im voting trump cuz i like his personality better lol i dont care about rights and that bs'#even if you can deradicalize someone by being kind thats years of insane unreciprocated energy for ONE guy#who will end up being the person who never posts abt feminism except to say i became alt right because women were mean so be nice girls!#nobody tells anyone else to accept full blown bigots in their spaces either much less BEFRIEND them#bc nobody is expected to do this kind of service except women. <3#eat ass.
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#posts#wind breaker#they are eating my brain up so fast like im laughing but its not even funny. i was supposed to replace my groceries today 😂😂#smoking and dont even got shit to eat due to Thinking About Media And Characters too much like 😂😂 im laughing but 😐😂😂😐😂#anyway these guys are hilarious and their sibling energy is off the charts. squabbling immediately then locking in immediately 😂😂#w a side of annoying tf out of eachother either way for the hashtag realism 😂😂😂#im not tagging their names this post will reach who its meant to reach lmao.......godspeed#if u saw me edit this. no u didnt :)
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mr house never being able to replicate his courier six because they never let him scan them, so all he has are a few shoddy recordings he took to recreate the courier from. his replicas of courier six are flawed: none are as perceptive, resourceful and proactive. they aren't good at out-of-the-box thinking or improvising. their problemsolving, diplomacy skills and technological innovation ideas fall short of the original and are just another disappointment every time. they end up hollow shells like jane, marilyn and victor. letting new vegas go, ruin itself in pursuit of recreating his perfect right hand again, hope for another fruitful partnership and bright future of the mojave like they did before is so delicious it makes me sick actually send tweet ✌
#ulysses warned my courier house would sooner or later put her face on a robot servant and he was right!! and she knew he was!!!#but the way house went about it in my headcanon is making me sick in the stomach!!!!!!!!!!!!!#the devnotes?? that allied courier was his first true prodigy/son/daughter IN 200 HUNDRED YEARS??? sickening. i love it#add a fucked up romantic-not-really-only-pining storyline into that already crazy cocktail and im eating it up!!!!!!!!!!! YUM!!!!#my courier is a technophile but she's got a shred of self-respect and wont let (out of pride mostly) house scan her brain#she dies ensuring the continuation of new vegas setting it up to prosper only for house to let it go to shit.... the drama.........#because he cannot imagine a world without his partner who has changed the world around them so much in such a short life....#so he sets out to recreate even a shred of her glory so they may continoue to reign over the mojave but he fails miserably over and over#and his pursuit blins him to the shit stirring on the streets and the area that even his army of securitrons isnt able to stop#either the nv clans successfuly rebel/make the city go to shit while he's too busy working on the courier copies#or some outside party infiltrates and gets his ass while he's not looking. rip#either way my courier is always the death of mr house whether they are allied or not bc i love doomed narratives#personal#delete later#fallout#? technically#till we get season 2 of the tv show im able to brainstorm ideas as to what happened to nv after fnv ended!!!! SOMEBODY STOP ME (dont)#im cutting this extremely short my thought on this are pretty long i couldnt fall asleep on monday bc ulysses' words were haunting me
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i mean jinx’s not dead though. she managed to do what allucination silco was encouraging her to do. she walked away
Bro why even do a fake out death with Jinx, there's no point. I've seen people say she's on the airships and I got nothing for you there. She could be! But unless the camera shows me her alive and traveling away there's no point.
I've seen the "She's hiding from Piltover" yeah but the camera isn't piltover. Jinx is dead because the writers couldn't think of a better ending to give her, they didn't know how to wrap up her storyline neatly with the finale they wrote. If they wanted her on the airships they would actually give us that. Cait glancing at stuff could just mean other Zaunites got to go on the airships, it doesn't mean Jinx herself survived
#like Im sorry any implications of Jinx surviving dont make it better and it feels lazy as shit from the writers#this is the finale and they just didnt want to give us that#there is no 100% thing saying Jinx is on an airship because the writers didnt want to do it#it feels like they wanted a dramatic ending but also eat their cake too#woke up and saw this and anon Im not mad at you but its bad writing either way imo#they needed another seaason if they wanted to do all that and they knew they didnt#trim out shit and settle on stuff that would leave a good story oike Jinx is a big issue but the last act was overall pretty bad#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#arcane season 2 spoilers
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instead of hunger i just get nauseated so i cant eat so i take my nausea med but then i fall asleep and then also cant eat and when i wake up i see my body and realize im not hungry anymore
#rigormortisangel#chronic illness + anorexia is a deadly (literally) combo#like when i try to recover from my ed i get extremely ill like to the point of needing to be in hospital#bc if i eat more than like. a small bowl of rice and a few pieces of meat my body cant digest it all in time#and cant absorb nutrients from it#so i get 90% of my nutrients from supplements and then i take even more meds#to be able to swallow food and also shit it out#so basically. im cooked.#oh and when im not flaring up i still feel fat so i just dont eat either way im trapped in this cycle lol#but whatever ig its nice when a LITERAL NUTRITIONIST says shes jealous of the fact i cant eat hahahahhah#bitch HELP ME FUCKINH#youre not supposed to say thattt
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ououghhh
#oughh i need to restart my diet im feeling so baddd TwT#literally feel like garbage from the way ive been eating but ive been just so stressed and so much has been happening#that i didn't have ghe mental space to keep up with the diet and just kind of put it aside#but now i just feel constantly sick and full and im not even trying to restrict to eat like normal amounts im just going crazyy#doesnt help that my scale ran out of batteries and i keep forgetting to buy new ones#ughh#but yeag i feel reall bad and stuffed and sick constantly and the hunger cues are all over the place again and it's just#a horrible time#dude i felt so good physically when i was dieting i need to go backkkk#but it takes.... so much mental energy#i guess i have to pick one over the other ughhh#diet mention#weight mention#fuckk i dint wanna fuck up my progress either but tbh im not that worried about that rn im not going to regain everything from even a few#weeks of eating like shit#even now i just woke up and i feel really bad physically because of everything i ate ughhhh
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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tried putting on my radiator for the first time this winter (we've had snow this week.... its focking cold) but it trips the fusebox for the entire flat lmfao. I'm fuuuucked 😐
#all the other radiators work fine its just mine :'(((#and bc its thw weekend they wont come out to fix it until monday at least so thats great#its fine i havent needed it on this week so far and i have layers and a hot water bottle so ill be fine but i did cry abt it a bit#but not so much abt the radiator just a lot on my mind.. i couldnt pick up my prescription after work either bc the secretary left half an#hour early and the very kind nurse who had a look for it anyway couldnt find it and i cant get there any earlier next week bc of work#i know itll be fine ive already sent an email to ask if they can send it to my local pharmacy instead ill get my meds before they run out#but still i cried a bit walking home from the clinic 😢 just been a long week even if not a bad one. and i miss my friend whos moving#he'll be on the plane now.... man. its a bit selfish but im also sad abt it bc he always noticed how i was feeling when i was at the gym#like if i was privately dealing w some shit or just wasnt quite myself he could tell n would find a moment to gently ask or just be there#without probing abt it like man hes so reassuring and kind and has such a big heart. before he left he asked me to look out for some of#the quieter ones in our group and make sure they feel included and someones listening to them when he wont be around to anymore#😢💔💔💔💔 and i know i didnt know him long enough to become proper good friends with him but it meant a lot that he looked out for me#like all i really want in this world is to feel seen n safe esp when im having a hard time. and none of my closer friends really do that#and thats okay like its not their fault and they just express their way of caring differently but sometimes i feel so lonely ah....#and also my period is due and im kind of scared of how painful itll be bc the last few have been so bad snd i find loneliness a lot harder#when im in a lot of pain and anyway this is all probably just the pre period hormones making me so tearful so it doesnt matter#its ok made a big bowl of rice so im going to eat that wrapped up cosy in bed with a movie i think. and then sleep#.diaries
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i wonder if the tumblr perthchimon community is aware that chimon answered a fan's question hinting that their next series is gonna be mafia themed
#i still dont know if he was being fr#or if he just said it for shits and giggles#but theres like only 1 gmm director id trust with a mafia series#and im sure it isnt gonna be directed by him so... yeah#EITHER WAY im willing to eat anything up if they give me miserable perth with glasses#which... im also probably not gonna get#perthchimon
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TW: long vent post, pass on by, don't read etc etc, I just need to get this out somewhere because it's still messing me up; I had one of the most gut punch conversations with my father I've maybe had ever in the two years since his brush with the ICU and like. This one hit me with a tons-of-bricks feels that nearly had me in tears, but also I can't get out of my mind. Routine duty call, right? My father, still an asshole, has had health issues and nearly died, so I just check on him to see how he's doing, and like has happened before, he took the awkward lull in conversation that happens to try and bridge some long dormant, decades old sounds, and he got weirdly emotional and said he missed me a lot and thinks of me every day (heard that one before) And then this man pulled a god damn MCU Yondu as he said, I'm sorry I didn't do right by you for all those years. You're a good boy, no, a good MAN. I never should have sent you away when you were a kid, I regret it every day.
And son when I tell you that was a punch to the guts because my crippling fears of abandonment, my sense that I am broken, that I was torn away from any sense of safety or knowing what home was started when I was 17 years old, and how can I describe to anyone just what this old man just SAYING THESE WORDS does. I don't even understand it myself, except to say it was both a painful knife wound and the softest hug I have ever been given in my life. And to have HIM saying it, I. Dude. I didn't have the words then, and I don't now. I had to continue the conversation like it wasn't anything and then tell the old man I love him and then I got my coffee and bagel and went in the Cafe Aroma toddler play area to like, weep. I don't sincerely think he even knew how hard that hit me. I don't know if he knows how impacting his words are, or even if he feels them as deeply as I do. I don't know.
He DID say this as a pivot to talk about my brother Michael, and that is the second part of this conversation that is sticking in my mind currently; It also has me thinking that my dad's confession that he done me wrong was secondary. Maybe, even, a salving of his ego, because he put it on me that now that Michael might be going to jail again that I'm his only son who isn't a disappointment.
Shoe is on the other foot now, since he once said I'm the family disappointment. Really feels like he just passes that one around.
And I am fairly disquieted and frightened and worried about Michael. I always, always am.
Dad just went off spilling tea, telling me Michael is borrowing money again, he's buying suspicious quantities of lighter fluid (again?), he's driving without a license with warrants to spend a night in jail again, and I get to be the only one who can't fully cut Michael out when he does this shit, or turn it off like my sister does with family shit like with Dad too. I get to worry from afar, ask myself how can I stay letting Michael's recidivism break my damn heart.
I don't have answers, it was a heavy seven minute phone conversation that was mostly about work, until it wasn't. I'm still reeling. Good feelings, bad feelings, worried feelings, all of it.
I'm not used to my father telling me positive reinforcement.
I'm not used to being told that I'm a good boy, no, a good MAN. Especially not when the same man has said I'm the disappointment.
It's all bouncing around in my head and it's hard to calm it down. Sometimes, I wish I hadn't ever kept contact with the kinder, gentler Warner, ya know, not even after his ICU stay. But also it's ... Very mixed bag, some good to take out of that, some very, very bad. The good even is hard to take fully accepting, even, but damn... It's....... Something to be told by one of the world's biggest assholes that he knows somewhere along the line he's done wrong. And maybe I do take it accepting? Maybe he saw death straight in the face in the ICU and he's slowing down and getting old and now he's full of regrets?
Told you man, it's all daddy issues all the way down, I have nowhere else to write this
#Long post nobody read#Sincerely if you read this youre either my hero or I am really sorry because its...#Sad? Depressing? Dark? Complicated?#But like fair game if you read my shit thats on you#But like#Its...... hard with him#He DID shift the youre a disappointment from me to Michael just bc Michael is fucking up#And Im... really upset that Michael is fucking up#But to hear someone who abused me physically mentally and every which way but Sunday say that I turned out to be a good man#Is.#Man.#I have a lot of words but I do not have THE words#Do you believe that even an asshole can change?#Do you believe that even the devil can change?#Anyway#Sorry#Just really. needed to get this out and it feels more unhinged than I wanted but it's#Eating me
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getting out of my bed is ALWAYS a mistake <3
#give them an inch they'll take a mile#they always have to ruin everything#i just have to start the topic of ''uh so about dinner...'' and instead of perhaps. supposing.#that their kid struggling w various eating disorders might be already kinda stressed about the whole thing#they just go ooooooh yeah why not dine out tonight#FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU#why have you completely stopped giving a single flying shit about what might be difficult for me#the very second i started being able to control the VISIBLE UNSTOPPABLE PANIC#why does something have to be litterally the end of the world for me for you to fucking care for once#why is this the only way to have quality time with my own goddamn parents. mandated enabled binge sesh.#I KNOW IM THE PROBLEM#TRUST ME I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL WE GET OUT OF EACH OTHERS LIVES EITHER#BUT IN THE MEANTIME YOU COULD FUCKING TRY TO NOT TRAP ME INTO IMPROMPTU TORTURE SESSIONS#LESS THAN SIX MONTHS BEFORE IM OUT OF YOUR HAIR FOREVER HOPEFULLY#YOU SIGNED UP TO MAKE SOME SACRIFICES WHEN YOU HAD A KID CMON DONT GIVE UP NOW#im. god. i know i shouldnt hate them for that. they do make sacrifices and efforts.#just entierly the wrong sacrifices and efforts that don't ever fucking help#they're full of love but goddamn are they awful at raising a child#broadcasting my misery#vent
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my ass is def bruised
#TMI but IDGAF!#worse aura loss of my actual life im sorry piercer lady. i didnt want you to see me eat shit on the bathroom floor either if that helps#it would’ve been way worse if i threw up she said she had a phobia.. 1.5 aura points regained
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I don't want to get off my phone I don't want to stay on my phone I don't want to pump gas I don't want to do deliveries I don't want to get ready for bed I don't want to write anything of substance I don't want to create I don't want to not create I don't want to be here I don't want to go anywhere I don't want to move I don't want to stay still my brain and body seem to simply want to sit here and Yearn
#is this like a shutdown i think we're having a shutdown#cuz like#we're not experiencing the pain of the overwhelm#but that's because we're dissociating really bad#like am i blitz are we blurry have we been in this parking lot for hours#why can't i just do anything but type#we're just sitting here numb and unmotivated#vent#i guess#tagging in case as always#idk man#“get a hobby” we have several#“get a life” we have. one but we have to share#“get a job” 2 jobs going on possibly 3 next month ok im starting to understand#we are indeed having to face a future and have no solid Plans yet#i thought getting our biggest worry out of the way now that my cat is w a trusted friend would help#but everything else is at the Forefront of our mind now whoops!!#ironically it would be better if we just. cane up w a plan#but noooo sensory overload from our own fucking chatter#allllll dayyyyyy#fuckkkkk#we're probably gonna go to bed lol i can try again tomorrow#we're ok just. we “shouldn't be” if that makes sense lol#if we're going to be a wreck i wish i could at least provess it#like it's worse than emotional denial i straight-up don't have access to said emotions rn#“don't underestimate my capacity to not wanna” type shit sjfhhshsh#oh also we need to eat dude come on#dont want to do that either but alas we need nutrients to live#at least we like living!#usually lmao also i did it (apparently) i reached 30 tags. thank u tumblr i love yapping
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Actually cry so goddamn hard when I think about Shinjiro Aragaki healing and being loved and having to learn to be okay with himself and being taken care of
#writing him has just been like. OOOOWOEOEOEOOE i piss tears i cant handle this shit this gay ass shit#i came up with an idea for just like a cute short one shot i wanna do soon and hnnnghh im so emo about it#very healing its like very hard to write some of the shit im gonna be writing cuz basically#some of it is just a little too real man and while i crave the angst and the drama i am just like#AND THEN EVERYONE HOLDS HANDS AND ITS OKAY PLEASE DONT CRY PLEASE#and ive mentioned how shinji has accidentally become nb to me now because i just kinda happened to write him that way without meaning to#and now another thing im noticing is that in my fic hes kinda bpd coded#it definitely wasnt intentional but now im accepting it as truth no one can stop me#i just really need him to be happy its more important to me than anything else man i need it for me#and he needs to be gay with aki they need to kissy and i think its funny cuz even in the parts where shinji is mad at aki and pushing him#away its like. he kinda has it bad lol and its clear he feels no actual hatred towards aki but more just self deprecation because he doesnt#feel good enough and like idk i just think about their respective roles in society like#aki is an honor student star boxer hero very attractive very kind very popular got adopted by a rich family#hes going places you know meanwhile shinji is a drop out who never had a family ever hes homeless hes sketchy hes on drugs#his reputation couldnt be any worse and he just leans into it and feels he has no future and hes worthless garbage#and aki could literally have anyone he wants you know he has an army of girls pining over him but he doesnt want them#HE WANTS SHINJI AND NO ONE ELSE HE SPENDS YEARS CHASING AFTER HIM#and shinji HATES it hes trying so hard to push him away and be the crusty delinquent and make aki see how worthless he really is#but aki just doesnt stop he loves him so much makes me sick SICK#and shinji really loves him back hes like not gonna shut up ever about aki hes like either doing it in a gay ass annoyed way#or hes like ‘haha omg aki is so cute though hes always trying so hard to be tough but hes just so sweet and gentle you know i hope he#doesnt push himself too hard if he got hurt id fall apart hes so silly i hope hes eating good i desire him carnally’#yeah sorry gamers this is just a pairing i cant be normal about they mean so much to me personally the fate of the world rests upon them
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