#edit: oh my god i had the wrong ship name. i was thinking of the fanon one LMFAOO

[turtletoads]

in the pillar of autumn. straight up "chiefing it".

[zabala0z]

Welcome to “New Fan consistently listens to TMA S2 while playing Minecraft and dying by a skeleton” I’m your host: the new fan. Or I dunno if I’m considered a new fan since I’m listening to s2 but I guess the podcast was made in 2016 and I finally got to it circa 2024. Anyways! Gotta get to it! Post too long already!

MAG 57: Personal Space

Eughhh this one is like top 5 TMA EPS of creeping me out. Lot of stuff here so I’m gonna talk a while. For example, Conrad Lukas was in charge of the project and the Lukas family was shown in Alone and Boatswain Call. Speaking of the latter, Nathaniel Lukas gave an investment to the project. He was the captain of that ship in MAG 33. Pinnacle Aerospsce is majority owned by the Fairchild family WHO CANNOT STAY OUT OF PEOPLES BUSINESS 💀

Carter, the guy who did the project, also had that feeling of being utterly alone in this damn void. He said the line between reality and dreaming was blurred, finding himself in space, a graveyard or an empty ocean. The latter two I think are a reference to Alone and High Pressure respectively which all have the theme of “loneliness, stranded, etc” in common.

The whole “being alone in a large empty space” has been a pattern. The Fairchild family features in that theme and even the Lukas family in Alone. Optic Solutions Limited is based in Norway but the only connection I can figure out is that Jurgen Leitner was from Norway but maybe there was something I missed. Anyways that’s it. God 😭

Nothing much on MAG 58: Rations. Another kind of emphasis on meat. I felt so bad for the unknown lady :( (EDIT 9/2: Benjamin Carlisle shares the same last name as Toby Carlisle and both have very prominent meat themes. God.)

MAG 59: Recluse

Oh boy Raymond Fielding. From what I heard before, I thought he was a good guy since like y’know he took in troubled kids but noooo. He seems to be like the same thing as that woman from Children of the Night. Creepy spider thing. Also; that damn table. Now we finally know what happened to the middle of the table, like the square. Also the apple; Same apple Evo found in burned out. Even described the same. Agnes also, in my theory, a good person because she kissed Ronald’s cheek before he left and then was persuaded to go down to the study where his cheek started burning and snapped him out of it. I think she’s good. I dunno what her deal is but still.

Also, again, the table. It’s definitely the same table. How did Graham find it? He said he bought it in a second hand shop in MAG 3. Did Ray donate it after the events? Did the house burn down but the table still survived? Like god. How did the middle part of the table end up under the tree? With the apple? I have so many questions.

MAG 60: The Observer Effect

Another eye theme. Not many connections but I’m assuming she wanted to blow up the Magnus institute with those barrels of petrol. Maybe she found out something her brother was involved in which she blamed the institute for. I think he didn’t die of a stroke because no one ever dies of natural causes, I mean come on.

Also. Jon getting an intervention is the funniest thing ever. Like he was like before “they’re avoiding me and giving me fruitful glances, they’re up to something” like my dude, they are worried about you 💀

“Yeah sorry if I’ve been distant”

“You literally watch my house”

“You rummaged through my desk”

“You said I was lying about a murder”

I’m literally cackling. They’re not even wrong, Jon is going a little cray cray from all this. He needs an emotional support cat I think.

[xxduncandonutxx]

The proshit discourse is so funny to me because, you would think it would be obvious for the disgusting freaks of nature to know that "Hey, drawing problematic ships and such is... well, problematic" but I guess not.

Content warning: mentions of pedophilla, further discussive about proshitting, incest and so on.

Like, Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying YOU CAN'T write problematic or dark stories and subject matters but if you are going to romanticize them or treat them as a cutesy thing then that's when I'll have a problem. You need to handle heavy subject matters respectfully, don't be like Reitanna Seishin who admitted to enjoying same-sex incest and had written a story where a baby was born with a sexual addiction to the point that if the child doesn't do anything it'll have seizures and pass out (yes, that's an actual story that she is writing). I also seen proshitters trying to use so many excuses of why they make that sort of content, one of the comment excuses is "To deal with trauma" or even "My therapist says that I'm allow to draw/create this content because it helps me". Which if that is the case then... why not do it on a private account or away from the public? Because if you are going to draw proshit stuff or write proshit stuff as a way to cope with what happened to you in the past, you should do it in private because by posting it in the public you are feeding predators and abusers (or future abusers) this sort of stuff or even making the child think that this stuff is "okay" and "normal" (just like what happened to me in the past where unfortunately, I met a couple of people and use to listen to a certain YTber [*cough cough* reitanna seishin] and was convince that incest is "fine" as long as it's same sex couples... thank god I never wrote or created art of same sex incest or anything but still, it fucked me up and opened to me being groomed online). I highly suggest reading this comic which expands further on the topic.

Also as for the whole "Oh my therapist suggest me to write and draw this stuff" ....find a new therapist please. Because if that's really the case, that is very concerning if you're therapist is telling you to draw that shit and post it to the public. Because, I never heard of a therapist telling their patients to post cp or proshit content in the public where potential creeps can jack off to it... EDIT 31/07/24: Ummm... I just remember that I "did" made same sex incest art but it wasn't really art, it was a mlp next gen adoptable I made when I was younger... reminder, I was being influenced by certain users on deviantart (unoriginai and i forgot the other person's user) and the fact I was listening to Reitanna's stories about Jin and Gin (i think that's how you spell their names) and her rambling about how it's "fine" to create mlm/wlw incest. I did eventually I did "stop" by stop I mean someone suggested me to NOT call them next gens and call them fusions instead which I did, to this day I never made any fusion adoptables or next gens that were literally sibling x sibling or child x adult instead I just made normal next gen adoptables after I was kicked off of Deviantart and lost contact with my groomer(s) and one of my friends actually coming to me concern and explaining to me that this shit is not okay

[notstilinski]

Book Lovers Starters !

Taken from the 2022 novel by Emily Henry, Book Lovers! Some of these have already been edited. You can change them however you see fit!

“Is she a baker? The woman you’re leaving me for.”

“What went wrong is that, in a past life, I betrayed a very powerful witch, and that put a curse on my love life.”

“All I need from them is a full credit report, psych evaluation, and a blood oath.”

“Oh my god, what is that? Are you planning a bank robbery?”

“FOR ALL I KNOW, YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE FEELINGS.”

“I could tie a bedsheet around your ankle and drag you up.”

“I’m a grown adult, (Name). I can buy my own Bigfoot erotica, thank you very much.”

“You are in control. You won’t let anything bad happen to them ever again.”

“I wouldn’t call it bloodlust. I don’t revel in exsanguination. I do it for my clients.”

“(Name) is here. Everything must be okay.”

“You really are sickeningly good at everything, you know that, right?”

“If you offer to lend me your Crocs again, I’m going to sue you for emotional damages.”

“To be known isn’t necessarily to be admired.”

“If I knew the answer to that, (Name), I’d have ascended to a higher plane.”

“Yeah, well, you should try almost marrying then and see if that helps.”

“If you’re into cat pee and gasoline.”

“I’m going to be up all night making diagrams and charts, trying to figure out what you just said.”

“You are much weirder than I thought.”

“Do they eat outsiders?”

“Can it really be called fanfiction if the author clearly isn’t a fan?”

“I can tell you’re pleased with yourself when your eyes go all predatory like that.”

“(Name) will listen to you. You could sell snake oil to a snake oil salesman.”

“The ship of their disappointment in me set sail a long time ago. I’d have to do something WAY sluttier to let them down now.”

“Right. There will make it easier to knock them out and empty his pockets. What should our signal be?”

“If you’re looking for your dignity, you won’t find it here.”

“Does that mean you want to date my bullies, or to humiliate them?”

“And that’s how they discovered your passion for serial killing.”

“So I’ve found the key to (Name)’s joy. My sexual humiliation.”

“Is it possible you don’t have any pain receptors?”

“You’re right. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to accept this can’t be anything.”

“Next time try not to look so excited at the thought of misery. It’ll help you blend in better.”

“Yes, together we add up to one emotionally competent human, a real accomplishment.”

“I would be adorable in Daisy Dukes and pigtails.”

“What do you think the age gap is between these actors? Sixty-eight years?”

“There are far worse things to be. Normal is a badge I wear proudly.”

“And by you’ve seen me, you mean you’ve watched me.”

“You’re not a disappointment. You’re not wrong.”

“I’ll remember you begging until my last dying breath.”

“You fucking undo me.”

“I just don’t want to be here anymore. I want it to stop.”

“You look like you haven’t slept in years.”

“You’re not useless, (Name). I mean, look at all this.”

“If we stay together, every single day for the rest of our lives is going to be the same.”

“I once had a sex dream about the green M&M.”

“If (Name) had known how hot the reverend is, they probably would’ve made it down here sooner.”

“If I had to pick one person to be in my corner, it’d be you. Every time. You take care of shit.”

“I wanted to help. I wanted to take care of you.”

“See? I’m perfectly harmless over here.”

“Yes, you have lost something but maybe, someday, you’ll find something too.”

“What about what you want? Who’s making sure you’re happy, (Name)?”

“You do have me, (Name). I never stood a chance.”

“I had no idea it was possible for you to want me as much as I want you.”

“(Name). You shouldn’t have to be alone through that.”

“It’s just… Ever since then, it���s been hard to imagine letting anyone close like that. Not when I’m so fucking broken I can’t sleep anywhere but my own bed.”

“Don’t be sorry. Please don’t apologize for letting me know you.”

“For what it’s worth, I doubt I will ever like anyone else in the world as much as I like you.”

“Sometimes the first act is the fun part, and then everything gets too complicated.”

“A week ago I liked you so much I would have wanted to try to make this work. But now I think I might love you too much for that.”

“If anyone could be enough, I think it might be you.”

[mot-hesbian]

I'm back on my Lily bs, especially with my headcanons

Ttpd is so Lily, Blair, and Jenny coded (some Serena but I feel like she's Evernights in a way I can't explain)

Here is my list from The Anthology

Fortnight- it's Dair, I have literally nothing else to say

The Tortured Poets Department- this is either post breakup derena or maybe dair

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys: controversial take: this isn't 🪑. The vibes are wrong, it's Lily and William during their marriage (if you've read my fics you know what I mean by that. I have many feelings about them.)

Down Bad: Rufly??? Dair??? Serenate vibes??? 🪑???? Jagnes??? Who knows? It fits them all so well

So Long, London: it's 🪑. That's it. She tried so hard to hold on but he kept drifting away.

"You say I abandoned the ship, but I was going down with it, my white knuckle dying grip holding onto your quiet resentment. And my friends say it isn't right to be scared, everyday of a live affair, every breath feels like rarest air, and you're not sure if he wants to be there"

"You sacrificed us to the gods of your bluest days"

"you swore that you loved me, but where were the clues? I died on the alter waiting for the proof"

But Daddy I Love Him: Rufly, pure and simple.

"I'm running with my dress unbuttoned, screaming but Daddy I love him"

"I'll tell you something right now, I'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to I've more second of all this bitching and moaning"

"I'll tell you something about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace"

"there's a lot of people in town that I bestow upon my fastest smile, scandal does funny things to pride but brings Lovers closer"

"now I'm dancing in my dress in the sun... I'm his lady, and oh my God you should see your faces. Time, doesn't it give some perspective? And no, you can't come to the wedding."

Fresh Out The Slammer: the 🪑 and Louis to Dair pipeline. She knows who her first call will be to. And so do we.

Florida: I saw someone say this song is Ivy and Lola, and yeah, that's them if they had a decent storyline. Also, Jagnes. Jenny and Lily. Serena. Blair would never go near Florida outside of spring break.

Guilty As Sin?: I saw an edit of Rufly to this song and now all I can think of when I listen to it is them is season 1 (pre hook up) and season 2 (pre relationship). Lily and Serena's talk in season 1, the Thanksgiving episodes, the winter dance episode, the whole PI bs, everything with Allison tbh

"what if he's written "mine" on my upper thigh, only in my mind"

"without ever touching his skin, how can I be guilty as sin?"

Who's Afraid Of Little Old Me?: It's Jenny.

"I am what I am cuz you trained me"

"you caged me then called me crazy" "I'm always drunk on my own tears, isn't that what they all said?"

"I was tame, I was gentle til the circus life made me mean, don't you worry folks, we took out all her teeth"

"I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street, crash your party like a record scratch as I shriek "who's afraid of little old me?" You should be"

"At all costs keep your good name" "Is it a wonder I broke? Let's hear one more joke"

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can): 🪑

"the smoke cloud billowed out his mouth like a freight train through a small town. The jokes he told across the bar were revolting and far too loud."

"Your good Lord doesn't need to lift a finger, I can fix him. No, really, I can. And only I can."

Loml: Season 1 and 2 Derena

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart: Lily, Jenny, Blair, and a hint of Serena.

"All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting "more". I was grinning like I'm winning, I was hitting my marks, cuz I can do it with a broken heart."

"Cuz I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit. They said "babe, you gotta fake it til you make" and I did."

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived: Lily and William. I'm obsessed with them and the psychological ramifications his existence alone has on her, your honor. Like, I hate him, I hate them, but I'm fascinated by how horrible their relationship is. Also, Eric and William to a degree. Serena never seems to reach this point.

"Was any of it true? Gazing at me starry-eyed in your Jehovah's Witness suit. Who the fuck was that guy?"

"And I don't even want you back, I just want to know, if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal"

"you hung me on your wall, stabbed me with your push pins. In public, showed me off"

"you didn't measure up, in any measure of a man"

"And you'll confess why you did it, and I'll say "good riddance," cause it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden. I would've died for your sins, instead I just died inside. And you deserve prison but you won't get time"

"You kicked out the stage lights but your still performing"

"and in plain sight you hid, but you are what you did. And I'll forget you but I'll never forgive"

The Alchemy: Lily and Blair in gen tbh, but specifically with Rufus and Dan.

"cuz the sign on your heart says it still belongs to me"

"he jokes that it's heroin but this time with an 'e'"

"what if I told you I'm back? The hospital was a drag, worst sleep that I ever had, I circled you on a map. I haven't come around in so long, but I'm coming back so strong/to where I belong"

"so when I touch down, call the amateurs and cut 'em from the team. Ditch the clowns, take the crown, cause I'm the one to beat."

Clara Bow: it's the Cece (Clara) to Lily (Stevie) to Blair (Taylor) to Jenny (the new gen) pipeline for me. I can't explain how Cece fits, but she does. (Serena being told all the fresh air bs her entire life can be applied here as well)

"This town is fake, but you're the real thing. Breath of fresh air through the smoke rings. Take the glory, give everything. Promise to be dazzling"

"You look like Clara Bow in this light, remarkable. All your life did you know? You'd be picked like a rose."

"You look like Stevie Nicks in '75, the hair and lips. The crowd goes wild at her fingertips, half moonshine, a full eclipse."

"You look like Taylor Swift in this light, we're loving it. You've got edge she never did, the future's bright. Dazzling"

"the crown is stained, but you're the real queen, flesh and blood amongst war machines. You're the new god we're worshipping. Promise to be... Dazzling"

"Beauty is a beast that roars, down on all fours demanding "more." Only when your girlish glow flickers just so do they let you know, it's hell on earth to be heavenly. Them's the breaks, they don't come gently."

The Black Dog: Lily and William

"and so I watch as you walk into some bar called The Black Dog and pierce new holes in my heart"

"And it hits me, I just don't understand, how you don't miss me. In The Black Dog, when someone plays The Starting Line and you jump up, but she's too young to know this song that was intertwined with the magic fabric of our dreaming. Old habits die screaming."

"And I may never open up the way I did for you. And those best laid plans. You said I needed a brave man and proceeded to play him until I believed it too."

"now I want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes. And hire a priest to exorcize my demons, even if I die screaming"

"Six weeks of breathing clean air, I still miss the smoke"

"I hope it's shitty, in The Black Dog"

imgonnagetyouback: Lily and William and 🪑, Serena during her one-sided pining for Dan era.

"even if it's handcuffed I'm leaving here with you"

The Albatross: help, it's so Lily coded I can't

"Wise men once said, "Wild winds are death to the messenger," a rose by any other name is a scandal. Cautions issued, he stood shooting the messengers. They tried warning him about her."

"wise men once said "one bad seed kills the garden" "one less temptress, one less dagger to sharpen". Locked me up in towers, but I'd still visit in your dreams, and they tried to warn you about me."

"devils that you know, raise worse hell than a stranger. She's the death you chose, you're in terrible danger."

"cross your thoughtless heart, only liquor anoints you. She's the Albatross, she is here to destroy you"

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus: Serenate or platonic Eric and Jenny works too

"if you want to break my cold, cold heart, just say "I loved you, the way that you were"

"I changed into goddesses, villains and fools, changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules all to outrun my desertion of you and you just watched it."

"could it be enough to just float in your orbit?can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses? Cooler in theory but not if you force it to be, it just didn't happen"

How Did It End?: Blair and Louis, more specifically Blair after the accident

"guess who we ran into at the shop, walking in circles like she was lost"

So High School: Rufly and Eleanor x Cyrus, I will not accept criticism

"I feel so high school when I look at you, cuz look at you"

"and in the blink of a crinkling eye, I'm sinking, our fingers entwined. Cheeks pink in the twinkling lights, tell me 'bout the the first time you saw me. I'll drink what you think, and I'm high from smoking your jokes all damn night, the brink of a wrinkle in time."

I Hate It Here: Lily and Jenny, they chose this life, regardless of how that choice was made, and it made them feel worthless. They both need to escape, they disappear into their different vices to help them cope.

"tell me all your secrets, all you'll ever be is my eternal consolation prize"

"if comfort is a construct, I don't believe in good luck, now I know what's what. I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind, people need a key to get to, the only one is mine"

"I will go to lunar valleys in my mind, when they find a better planet only the gentil survived. I dreamt about it in the dark, the night I felt like I might die"

"I'm lonely, but I'm good. I'm bitter, but I swear I'm fine. I'm save all my romanticism for my inner life, and I'll get lost in purpose. This place made me feel worthless."

thanK you aIMee: Jenny and Blair in high school

"all that time you were throwing punches, I was building something. And I can't forgive the way you made me feel. Screamed "fuck you, Aimee" to the night sky as the blood was gushing. But I can't forget the way you made me heal."

"I built a legacy you can't undo, but when I count the scars there's a moment of truth. That there wouldn't be this, if there wasn't you."

I Look In People's Windows: it's Bart era rufly

"what if your eyes looked up and meet mine one last time"

The Prophecy: Jenny and Blair

Cassandra: I cannot explain it but this is Lily

Peter: Carter and Serena?????? Is that you???? She's Peter

"are you still a mind reader? A natural scene stealer? I've heard great things Peter"

"the goddess of timing, once found us beguiling, Peter was she lying? My ribs say she did"

"lost in the lost boys chapter of your life"

The Bolter: Oh look, new Lily song just dropped. And Serena. To quote @strideofpride it always comes back to mothers and daughters

"with a quite bewitching face. Splendidly selfish, charmingly helpless, excellent fun til you get to know her."

"then she runs like it's a race, behind her back her best mates laughed and they nicknamed her "the Bolter""

"she's been many places with men of many faces, first their off to the races and she's laughing drawing aces but none of it is changing that the chariot is waiting. Hearts are hers for the breaking, there's escape in escaping."

"all her fucking lives flashed before her eyes, it feels like the time she fell through the ice, then came out alive"

"and at first blush this is fate. When it's all roses, portrait poses, central park lake row boats... That's when she sees the littlest leaks and just knows, she must bolt."

"ended with the slam of a door, then he'll call her a whore, wish he wouldn't be sore but if she was leaving it felt like breathing."

Robin: Eric, this is legit Lily and Serena when literally anything involves Eric

I can't even draw up lines, it's the whole song

The Manuscript: any relationship involving Blair

"all that's left is the manuscript, one last souvenir from my trip to your shores. Now and then I reread the manuscript, but the story isn't mine anymore."

[t0ast-ghost]

You know this has got me in a pretty deep (Obsession) which is the name of S2 episode 13 of Star Trek tos.

Better luck next time on that opening:

- Kirk’s on edge…

- Star Trek horror episode when?

- is this inspiration for when Doctor Crusher fucks a ghost

- god I love Chapel

- Hot new redshirt is probably the shapeshifter (edit: this is just wrong)

- The fucking gas is sneaking up on ‘em. Of all the things to die to it’s the vampire gas

- Kirk’s boyfriends both think that they should leave and deliver the supplies. Two versus one AND it’s the two that always fight against their favourite idiot

- Kirk ignoring both McCoy AND Spock is not a good sign

- The chief security guy dramatically flopping on his bed is so relatable bbygirl

- Kirk getting paranoid about his bridge crew “conspiring” is like. haven’t you learned trust? Haven’t you learned love? I guess he’s still a soldier at heart or smt

- “I hope I’m not disturbing you, Doctor.” “Interrupting another autopsy report is no disturbance, Mr. Spock. It’s a relief” I just remembered that they’re married and in love

- Spock outright asking McCoy for his advice/opinion is like. YEAH he respects you, he has his own beliefs and ideals but he wants to hear from you! And when he’s worried about your (boy)friend he wants you to be on the same page as him. He wants you to validate his thoughts.

- whatever the fuck this is

- “Mind if I come in?” McCoy you shouldn’t be able to just enter people’s quarters like that. Can’t you see he’s writing his diary and listening to Mitski in bed?

- Oh my Bones pulling out the big guns.. AND SPOCK. Oh they really were conspiring. You know if they worked together like this more often, they could literally do anything. Like kiss.

- Genuinely unsure if the gas is intelligent or not. I like the mystery of this one.

- “Jim, we’re not trying to gang up on you.” They are though and it’s probably for the best

- Love how the entire bridge crew is just like “this isn’t healthy. Kirk, this is concerning behaviour.”

- OH WOW Kirk came so close to blowing up his own ship

- “Self pity’s a terrible first course, how about you try the soup.” Christine Chapel is literally the best. She also knows how to make threats, not even McCoy knows about (I love how terrifying the medical department is)

- I want a pair of those slutty boots

- McCoy is fucking furious

- “I’m sorry, Jim. I was wrong.” McCoy in short sleeves <3

- Spock genuinely trying to comfort Kirk cause he has an unhealthy obsession with the creature and Kirk dismissing it

- Spock then trying to comfort the ensign

- He breaks the vent controls with his strength then tries to COVER IT WITH HIS HANDS. Spock, babygirl, that is not logical

- “Don’t misunderstand my next question. Mr. Spock, why aren’t you dead?” Happy to see you too, Jim

- “Bet he left a bad taste in the creatures mouth.” “Colloquially expressed, but essentially correct.” That is a fucking banger line

- KIRK HEALING ARC

- Spock and Bones at odds once again

- Of course Kirk is gonna be self sacrificial and Spock is going to try and self sacrifice himself.. admittedly Spock had the more logical thought process

- HE FUCKIN KARATE CHOPPED HIS NECK . WHAT THE HECK NEW GUY?!?

- I’d love if I lived on the enterprise and got little updates through the comms by Chekov “stand by for shockwaves.” Of course thank you :))

- Spock is like “I’m to thank, not god, thank me Jim.”

- Kirk healing <3

Better episode than I thought it would be :)

Masterpost

Episode written by Art Wallace

[ohbo-ohno]

babygirl bo <3 I have some Qs to which I beg you provide some As (I need me some of that deep bo lore)

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love

🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh 

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

babygirl lumi i love you so much. you're welcome to any lore you want

🍄 does puppy play count as a hc? because i write ghost calling soap "pup" as a kink thing but i also very much so think he'd just Do that.

if that doesn't count, then i'll say that one hc i swear by is that ghost is a freak but soap is 10x freakier and he's into literally every conceivable abuse ghost tries to commit agaisnt him.

also i think soap is suuuper smart but in a really specific way - can't spell for shit, but that man can rattle off college level math like it's nothing

🥤 is SUCH a good ask because now i can rec my fav cod x readers <3 (i know it says fic or author singular but you're getting multiple fics in place of me trying to tag authors and inevitably forgetting someone)

cod fics (but not the people i usually link because this post is already too long):

Baby Blue by kechiwrites (ghost x reader)

Taste by Sweet Deciet (ghost x soap x reader)

The Hand That Feeds by anonymous (ghost x soap)

Hypnotized (Fuck It) by ANTchan (ghost x soap)

Where Moonlight Meets the Sea by MildLimerence (ghost x soap)

Not More Than Once by WhisperedWords12 (ghost x soap)

NOT cod fics, but one for a few fandoms i love:

Declensions by dustorange is THE dick grayson origin fic. if there's one fanfic i wish i had written, it would be this

the first step of kintsugi by thepolysyndetonaddictsupportgroup is a peter parker & frank castle fic and im not sure it'll ever be finished but it is just. god it is perfect and probably my favorite fic of all time

anything by cupcakemolotov is gonna hit like no other for klaus mikaelson/caroline forbes. i love her so so much like she is my IDOL

ALL MOUTH. by themilkteeth is like the epitome of what a good darklina fic is. it's soooooosososo good i want it injected into my veins

the Blood Apron series by sciencefictioness is a great overwatch fic, but you really don't need to know the characters to enjoy the story! another one that'll never get added to, but i love it a lot

🥐 i don't like the lotr movies but there's a moment in the first (?) one where aragorn (?) is singing to himself and frodo (?) asks "who is this lady you sing of?" and for some reason i literally cannot watch it without keeling over in laughter. it's so fucking stupid

🪲 ohhhh we have beef for this one. i hate you a teeny tiny bit for making me write (/j). added it below the cut!

ok quick edit here but. i thought that said 500 words so uh. sorry but there's 500 words here instead of 50 lmfao. im a fool!!!!!

ghost x soap (cw for (legal) age gap)

He takes another look at the kid, now that he’s not planning on throwing him off the property. He’s got a bit of bulk, probably just recently started working out, and there’s a cocky energy coming off of him. Ghost would bet this is far from the first time he’s robbed someone with this little ruse, probably thinks he’s the smartest burglar in town. Too bad he chose the wrong man to try and trick this time.

Ghost straightens from the doorway, rolling back his shoulders and standing tall. The kid isn’t short by any means, but compared to Simon he’s practically little. Odds are he’s still got some growing to do, but for now Simon gets to enjoy the way he can loom over the teenager.

“No one ever taught you to respect your elders, boy?”

Oh, the kid doesn’t like that one. If he were a dog, his hackles would be fully raised, but he’s left settling for curling his lip back in a snarl. “You think just cause you’re old I have to respect you?”

“I think you’ll respect me because you’re on my property. That and I don’t think you’ll like what happens if you keep the attitude up.”

The kid flushes, either from rage or the innuendo. “Who the fuck do you think you are? You think just because we’re out here alone you can say whatever you want to me?”

“Of course not. We’re out here all alone, which means I can do whatever I want to you. And I will, if you don’t get off my property.”

The kid looks him up and down, then visibly steels himself. Ghost bites back a smirk. He’s not used to being underestimated, but he finds he doesn’t mind when it means getting to see the kid play at being his equal.

“What do you think you’ll do if I don’t go?”

Oh, Ghost can’t wait to beat the attitude out of the little brat.

He doesn’t let the kid see how much the rudeness is getting to him, intentionally keeping his face flat and unimpressed. “What’s your name, kid?”

That permanent scowl doesn’t shift, even as a flash of confusion crosses his face. “...John.”

Ghost nods. “Alright, Johnny, if you don’t get off my property, I’ll take you over my knee and teach you what your daddy should’ve.”

It’s nearly impossible to keep from grinning when Johnny’s mouth pops open in surprise, the flush creeping further up his neck. “You- you’ll- who do you think- you can’t-”

Ghost reaches out like he might slap Johnny, instead snaps right in front of his nose, sharp and loud. “Spit it out, boy. I don’t feel like listening to a kid learn how to speak all night.”

Johnny’s letting himself get worked up, and not doing a good job of hiding it. His teeth grind and he shifts from foot to foot, like he’d like to try and attack Ghost. He’s apparently smart enough to know how idiotic that would be, and Simon finds he’s almost disappointed.

[devastatinglygreen]

*types this like I’m writing a letter in the trenches*

It’s been a few weeks now and I thought the fandom would reach more of an equilibrium on opinion about S3 but the war rages on.

Seriously though I’m wondering how much of this is from unmet expectations, other fans telling polin fans they shouldnt be happy, or the discourse surrounding a different ship that is now intent on seeing S3 (and beyond) fail. Honestly and truly I just cannot take some of these criticisms seriously because i had to live through two seasons of *that storyline* for Polin which did nothing for their individual characters or relationship i said what i said. That storyline alone is why I'm fine CVD didn't get his hands on Polin.

Well thankfully we have 2 years to discuss this! (😶) Do you have any particular hopes on the next lead for S4? Do you find them pushing the starting date back again worrying?

bro. brosephine. oh my god. it's unreal, right?

people telling me i shouldn't be happy? i got a polin season which is all i've ever wanted, if i wanted to nitpick it to death, i would. i don't! let me live! critique it all you want but people not agreeing with you doesn't mean they're wrong, it means they have another perspective. idc idc, they were kissing and loving and got married like?? i'm still trying to come to terms with the fact that it happened? like it legit happened onscreen and i got to see it? that can be enough for me sometimes, okay, so let a bitch live. i know people had years of expectations but your unmet expectations aren't my problem, ha.

oh my. not all *insert ship name* but somehow always a *insert ship name* am i right?

*that storyline* JUMPSCARE. it was such a bad plot device too? just say you didn't know what to do with colin for 2 seasons because we already know. it served no purpose other than keeping both of them stagnant. which serves no one.

ohhhhh season 4 and 2 years to build it up in our heads. hmm. pls god if it's ben let that man do something besides explore his dick, i am begging. my husband ended up interested in polin's story based on s2 because he loves penelope (and kate and eloise--tho eloise is still on thin ice with him i guess) and colin but s3 made him so not interested in ben so i feel like they're going to have to bring in a lot of solid plot ground or market some good subplots to pick up the interest of the general public more than they have because right now i don't see any real chatter about being interested in ben's story. eloise, yes.

not too worried about them pushing the start date back, there could be plenty of reasons for that but i do think 2 years is too long to film and edit an 8 ep season so they need to figure that part out because sustainable interest isn't infinite on shows like this.

[sapphyreopal5]

Hey

Thank you for reading my ask and taking the time to respond 💖

I’d like first to correct something, the confession was hidden from jensen for three months before the shooting of the episode,not three years.

Agree with you on j2 hanging out without any convention to do, actually they hangout more on the panels and not so much on breaks, how many times do we see jensen and the cast together having fun and jared by himself, sleeping or having fun with his wife (some people would say it’s because the power that be doesn’t want j2 anywhere near each other, (because they need to hide their eternal love)

Jared also was asked on a panel by a fan : how do you keep your friendship (meaning j2’s) to which jared said : by doing this , meaning cons .

So they only see each other in conventions.

The LM and Gen saga : it was told that walker was his passion project, a family project that he made with his real life wife . That alone would attract audience’s attention it didn’t lol

They were all looking for LM and asking why isn’t she going to PR trips instead of the dead wife ?

Why is he taking his dead wife to talk about twwon and leaving the other lead back home ?

She was treated like an Extra for the sake of giving attention and limelight to the dead wife who shamelessly said she got the role via nepotism .

Waiting patiently for the day that LM grows some balls and say why she really left the show.

I don’t think he ever took anyone of his co-stars to these things, not just lindsy , just the nepo wife to talk about twwon and how she met jared while wearing her little white panties and he going along with saying he was the lead and he demanded that she wears only that (he was joking)

Yes they did more than take photos, they left a lot of stuff on their door step and in the brewery dead kittens and the head of a manikin doll and other stuff that only known to be used in witchcraft stuff with nails , all discovered by jensen he buried the kitten before his kids saw it so they don’t get scared, he didn’t let his wife touch the nails because he was afraid of getting hurt or disease or something.

And that’s just what he said, God knows what else,He has it bad .

This is the curse of being loved and shipped by two different sides , sides that refuse to acknowledge that it’s ok if you want to interpret things how you see fit, (jensen himself said that more than once, it’s open for interpretation, I respect your opinions, but this is how I played it)

Just hopped they respected his opinion as he did their’s

TW was such a bad idea I wish he didn’t listen to his wife who has her name all over it , but how do you tell your wife who was patiently living and taking care of your home for 16 years while you made your own dreams come true?

He couldn’t refuse, just like jared can’t, it’s their time / turn to have some fun and make something , but guess what?

Neither wife had the brain to do something of their own, they both needed their husbands name and fame and fans and money, oh and their face too .

Wish they really did something of their own and let the husbands take care of their kids, it’s only fair.

Thank you so much for coming back. I threw in an edit back in my last one about the photos outside of the kids' school (which I did hear about but actually don't want to look because it feels wrong seeing that honestly) and people actually pretending to be their kids' parents tidbit. If this is really true that someone did this at their kids' school, wow.... people really are terrifying with what they will do just to try interacting with their KIDS. I heard of the nails voodoo doll and the dead kitten somewhere myself, I myself am not a fan of Danneel but I wouldn't ever dream of sending horrifying things like that via mail or leaving it on their doorsteps.

TW was such a bad idea I wish he didn’t listen to his wife who has her name all over it , but how do you tell your wife who was patiently living and taking care of your home for 16 years while you made your own dreams come true?

This.... the highlighted part. I think this here Anon is why Jensen let her be part of the show when frankly she shouldn't have been or at least make executive decisions on it. She barely watched the show for heaven's sake, if she did at least that she wouldn't have said Dean learned it all from his mom.... who died when she was 4 for starters. I've said this in other posts but between it being a failure overall and the ongoing lawsuit happening right now, it was a blessing in disguise Jared was not part of it. I will say that I believe some weird things happened closed doors that the Prequelgate drama doesn't reveal or even the aftermath. I think it's possible he knew something as this post implies. However, I don't buy the whole "scheduling conflicts" reasoning for Jared. They could've held off on making The Winchesters and should've found something else to make. Buuuuut that's just me. This clip below summarizes in a short 27 second why Danneel was not fit to be Executive Producer for The Winchesters.

The LM and Gen saga : it was told that walker was his passion project, a family project that he made with his real life wife . That alone would attract audience’s attention it didn’t lol They were all looking for LM and asking why isn’t she going to PR trips instead of the dead wife ? Why is he taking his dead wife to talk about twwon and leaving the other lead back home ? She was treated like an Extra for the sake of giving attention and limelight to the dead wife who shamelessly said she got the role via nepotism . Waiting patiently for the day that LM grows some balls and say why she really left the show.

I will say it seems barely anyone cared that much Gen was gonna be on the show. Her role was barely significant overall and I felt many of her lines, especially in season 3 were unnecessary. It was filler and frankly her being in this show just screams nepotism to the point my deaf Aunt in Omaha heard it (referencing the movie "Disturbia" here). And don't get me started on the whole nepotism way she got the role. I know the official statements via interview state she was approached by the networks for the job. Someone said Odette may have mentioned Gen to the execs for the role of Emily as she was already in as Geri. For what, to appease your direct boss by mentioning his wife to his bosses as a suggestion for the role of Emily so it doesn't come from him? Genius, why didn't I think of doing this for any of the jobs I applied for? Oh wait....

As far as the whole Lindsey not being promoted but instead Gen and Jared only doing the promotions mostly at first, I was not around in this fandom when Walker first aired. I therefore wasn't around with it first being promoted but I have this funny feeling things aren't as perfect as they seem. What did you think of the latest Walker promo videos of say the kids being on the set and Jared going to everyone's trailers? I talked about this with a friend last night and I swear I cannot unsee what she said but something felt.... off and forced. I know it was to promote the show and it was obviously being recorded but some of these videos had such a strange "feeling" to them. Can't put my finger on it but maybe this "feeling" is related to what I think really goes on behind closed doors on set. Now, I have my own personal theory as to why Lindsey was not promoted as much and why she really left the show but it's more or less speculation on my part and a strong hunch I cannot shake but nothing concrete. I can definitely say I 100% do not buy the mental health, burnout related reasons being stated here.

I joined a Reddit group conversation about a month or so ago I chime into once in a while. A lot of the people in this group agreed with the sentiment we can't unsee Jared and Gen. We don't see Cordell and Emily when watching Walker period. Heck, even when they're not onscreen together, I literally cannot unsee Jared. I feel like he's being himself as Cordell except with the stammering, deeper voice and taking a moment to get sentences completed he does as Cordell and calls it a day. Sounds like a mean thing to say but when I watch Supernatural I see Sam. When I watch Friday the 13th from 2009, I see Cliff. When I see An Endless Ring of Light, I see Zach. When I watch Walker, I see Jared. I can't put my finger on it as to why I feel this sentiment let alone so strongly but I literally cannot see Cordell, only Jared.

He couldn’t refuse, just like jared can’t, it’s their time / turn to have some fun and make something , but guess what? Neither wife had the brain to do something of their own, they both needed their husbands name and fame and fans and money, oh and their face too . Wish they really did something of their own and let the husbands take care of their kids, it’s only fair.

Gen was 100% a terrible casting choice for the role of his dead wife period in my opinion for the reasons I stated earlier in this post. I mean, is this the show Walker or is it the Gen and Jared show? Come on now. Don't get me started on my real opinions of their marriage as it was implied in some of my more recent posts about them and in other places. I think both J2 feel stuck within their own marriages and the wives know they depend on them for their lifestyles and whatnot. TOWWN is not really doing a whole lot, a lot of talk but how much money is that company actually generating for them? Her affiliate marketing partnerships that is said to fund TOWWN? And the book club ads, how much money are those generating? One time I saw a post where a book discussion drew in a whopping like 27 people or may be 30 something, I'd have to go find it but man... Point is, I remember Jared joining a couple of those book discussions for "Happy Place" (oh the irony of that live video and what happened there) and "Whalefall" with the promise of potential a M&G with Gen and Jared to draw in more interest. My point with this is, they are both riding their husbands' coattails to even try establishing a career and the results are, well, dismal.

If you'd like, I'd love to chat with you via PM and we can share our theories with one another :)

[erenslovah]

DISLIKE?

Part One Part Two

Summary:You're a famous and great footballer,one of the greatest footballers you had a crush on turned out to be a complete ass,something will change maybe?

A/n:Nah cuz Idek,I started writing this at 5:55 am until 7:20 and I went to school and I just finished it,Idk if this gets attention I'm probably going to make a part 2

WARNINGS:Cursing,hate,trapping,blood,Jude being a complete ass😻😻

Jude and his family were watching TV,there you were,you were in an interview,Denise really liked you,and jude's father too.

Jude finds you annoying,his ex broke up with him cuz she was insicure because she knew Denise liked you alot and a few people shipped you with Jude,and he has developed hatred for you.

He keeps seeing edits of you,and videos everywhere,you were very kind hearted and nice,you were good looking too,like alot,people recently were going crazy for you,even his teammates and alot of his friends.

You were a footballer,a great footballer.

He keeps seeing you everywhere,his thoughts were cut off when the interviewer asked you what you thought about Jude Belligham.

'He's a great footballer,I like that he achieved great things at such a young age,I hope he can go on with his career and become more famous and a professional,he has a big potential'.

Denise turned to her son smiling at him 'Why do you hate her?She's so sweet,she's the one for you Jude'.

'No,she's annoying,she's probably doing that for attention,or to seem sweet'

'Jude' his mother glared at him,she turned to the TV when the interviewer asked you what you thought about Richarlison.

'I mean,he's my husband I don't know what y'all on'

Denise turned to Jude 'You better make a move'.

Jude was on the field,he was annoyed and nervous,why?YOU WERE COMING HERE.

You're so annoying and such a pick me,he couldn't understand why his teammates were exited to see you.After a few minutes you came and his teammates were so happy,they all greeted you happily,and they called his name and told him to come and greet you.

'Mate come here!' Phil souted.

Jude came even if he didn't want to,there you were,ugly as alwyas trying to have all the attention thinking that everyone wanted you.

He looked at you and you didn't spare him a glance.

'Hey I'm here' he said and you turned your head towards him 'Oh,hi I didn't see you sorry' you greeted him,and he only looked at you,and then he scoffed and went away.You were shocked,why was he acting like that?

The guys feeling the tension suggested you guys played for a while,they started to decide what you were gonna play,but your mind was on Jude,you didn't know what was wrong.

'Jude?' He lifted his head,scoffing when he saw you 'Are you okay?Something's wrong?Me and the guys are playing,you want to play with us?'

'No' he stood up and went away,he exited the field,you followed him.

'Did I say something wrong?What's wrong?'

'Can you shut the fuck up?For one minute,please shut your mouth,god you're so annoying,go annoy someone else,not me,I'm not blind and I won't feel for your plan to make everyone obsessed with you,literally shut the fuck up,you like whoring around so much,huh?'

You were still,not moving confused and on the verge of tears,you didn't know why he snapped like that on you.He noticed the tears in your eyes.

'Aww you're gonna cry now?Fucking crybaby' he said whilst pinning you to the wall behind you,you started crying,not being able to contain yourself,he looks down at you disgusted,he feels satisfied.He's proud but he feels kinda..Guilty?

'Stop crying' you started wiping the angry tears.

'You look even more ugly' you wanted to beat the shit out of him,but you just couldn't knowing that you'll feel bad about it later even if he deserves it.

He let's go of you after a while,you feel sick,meanwhile he goes back in the field.

'Mate did you see [name]?'

'She's inside doing something' he said,after a few minutes you came back,no signs of you crying visible on you face.

You guys started playing,Jude saw how well his teammates treated you,they never treated his ex like this.He's furious.When you catch the ball,he runs to you tackling you,you fell.Hard,blood started coming out of your nose and your mouth,his teammates rush to you

After taking care of you,his teammates confronted him,why was he acting like that?

'What the fuck mate?What's wrong?'

Jude didn't know what to say,he would've cried,if you didn't protect him.

'Guys he didn't mean to,it happens sometimes,it's football,I'm fine really'

The day ended and everyone was going back home,everyone was leaving and you took it as an opportunity to go talk to Jude.

'Jude?I'm sorry for what happened earlier,I hope you're fine'

You're so irritating.

'Shut up,I didn't need your help'

He grabbed you and trapped you between him and a locker.His face was so close to yours,you looked in his eyes.

Your chest was pressed against his.His mind running miles after the realization,he kinda liked the feeling of your chest against his.

You made eye contact,the tension reaching the moon.You try to squirm away,feeling flustered.

'Stay still' you stop moving,he's quite intimidating...

[nighttimeebony]

Reactions to The Last Olympian. Spoilers under the cut. And warning: long-ass post ahead.

EDIT: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

Yay, Rachel’s back! I like that Percy is able to have a mortal friend.

Paul is cool.

Look, I love Rachel, but why does there have to be a goddamn love triangle? Percy likes Annabeth, Annabeth likes Percy, you’ve already put the work into making me like them and we all know they’re going to be endgame, so why does there have to be so much fucking romantic drama? Can’t Percy and Rachel just be friends without the weird romantic tension? This whole plot is busy enough on its own without you trying to shove something else in at the last minute just because you’re bored, RICK.

Wow, Percy really doesn’t get to have any downtime, does he? My boy’s really on “save the world o’clock” time at all times.

Yay, Beckendorf! I love you!

OH MY GOD AND HE’S ACTUALLY DATING SILENA???!!!! Oh, that makes me so happy!! I love that my little background crackship is actually canon! And the fact that they were apparently Camp Half-Blood’s “yeah, we know” ship is hilarious and I love life right now.

Ooh, bombs.

Wait. No. No no no no no no no stop

FUCKING STOP, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!

WHY?!?!? WHY DID BECKENDORF HAVE TO DIE?!? RICK!!! WHY??!!! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME

I can’t even be happy that Tyson is here, I’m already so fucking depressed and it’s your fault, Rick.

Oh, hey, Triton. Which, fun fact, since Triton is Ariel’s father in the Disney movie, this means that (in the Disney canon at least) Hercules and Ariel are canonically cousins. So, hypothetically speaking, Percy would be related to the Disney princess Ariel, which you can’t convince me he doesn’t brag and joke about all the time.

“[Poseidon] had told me that I would know when to ‘spend [the sand dollar],’ but so far I hadn’t figured out what he meant. All I knew was that it didn’t fit the vending machines in the school cafeteria.” I love that the implication behind this is that Percy actually tried. He took this mysterious magic sand dollar that the god of the sea gave him and told him to spend wisely and wait for the right time to use it, and one day while he was at school, this fucking mad lad child decided to just cram it in the vending machine just to see what would happen. Percy is amazing and if you don’t love him, you’re wrong.

“Annabeth ran in right behind him, and I’ll admit my heart did a little relay race in my chest when I saw her. It’s not that she tried to look good… Still, just seeing her made me feel fuzzy in the head.” Actually screaming.

Clarisse’s friendship with Silena makes me so fucking happy. Clarisse is softer than she wants people to know and I love that about her. She’s so gentle with the people she loves and I’m here for it.

“Chiron and Annabeth exchanged looks, like they knew something that I didn’t. I hated when they did that.” Understandable. It happens a lot.

Oh, I recognize the name Chrysaor. Such a random reference, I love it.

JUST ADMIT YOU LIKE EACH OTHER YOU FRUITCAKES

“We headed downstairs to join the others. I didn’t know it then, but it would be the last time I ever visited the attic.” You know, Percy says something along these lines in every one of the books leading up to this one, and you’d think that I would learn to stop freaking out every time we get one of these lines, but you’d be wrong. Still getting anticipatory nausea and anxiety.

"The mountain tore itself apart, collapsing inward, and an enormous form rose out of the smoke and lava like it was emerging from a manhole." Typhon?!?!?! Do we have to deal with Typhon now too?!

Well shit, I guess we have to deal with Typhon now. Yeah, okay, sure, I don’t mind or anything.

“As far as I could tell, Rachel’s only rule about music was that no two songs on her i-Pod could sound the same, and they all had to be strange.” Hey, Rachel and I have the same music library.

Wait, so Rachel’s getting future vision dreams now too? But she’s not a half-blood, right? I thought only demi-gods got prophetic dreams.

Where the hell is Nico? What has he been doing this whole time? Just chilling in hell with dead people? And what even is his plan and why is it bad?

I think Silena is my new favorite character. Eating chocolates she doesn’t even like to try and cheer herself up is so horribly sad and depressingly relatable.

Percabeth!

“I shuffled uneasily and pretended to go through some more reports. Technically, even on inspection, it was against the rules for two campers to be… like, alone in a cabin.” I see what you’re implying, Rick, and I’m laughing.

“And I know some of you might be thinking, Aren’t all demigods related on the godly side, and doesn’t that make dating gross? But the thing is, the godly side of your family doesn’t count, genetically speaking, since gods don’t have DNA. A demigod would never think about dating someone who had the same godly parent. Like two kids from Athena cabin? No way. But a daughter of Aphrodite and a son of Hephaestus? They’re not related. So it’s no problem.” This is exactly how I predicted half-blood dating works, and it absolutely did not need to be addressed, but I kind of love that it was. It’s probably only funny to me because I was talking to my friend about this exact topic during school, and I made a “god incest chart” on a whiteboard so I could figure out if Percabeth would be considered incest. We eventually decided no, but still. My other non-pjo fanatic friends definitely started to question my sanity after that.

OH MY GOD! Is something gonna happen?! Are they finally going to confess?! Please, God, just give me this!

FUCKING GODDAMMIT, RICK!!! YOU CAN’T KEEP BLUE-BALLING ME LIKE THIS OR I’M GONNA RIP YOUR HAIR OUT

Oh, yeah, where the hell is Grover?

Wow, Annabeth really going for the throat here.

Aww, giant hell puppy

Nico!

Aww, of course Nico is sweet with the hell puppy

“Leneus’s knees started knocking. ‘I… I won’t answer questions with this hellhound sniffing my tail!’ Nico looked like he was trying not to crack up. ‘I’ll walk the dog,’ he volunteered. He whistled, and Mrs. O’Leary bounded after him to the far end of the grove.” I love this child. This child is my spirit animal.

Aww, Nico likes Juniper. That’s kind of adorable.

“[Nico’s] cold creepy smile made me sorry I’d agreed.” Have I mentioned I love this child?

Okay, shadow travel is the coolest thing ever, and definitely one of the coolest powers you could give to a child of Hades.

Everything with Luke’s mom… Oh, that’s horrible. I can’t imagine having to come to the realization that your own parent isn’t entirely there, especially at so young.

Little girl… not a monster… and something to do with fire… Shit, I got nothing.

HESTIA! Goddammit… I should’ve known that one.

I like that Percy refers to both Paul and Sally as his parents.

I really like Paul. I love it when step-parents are portrayed in a positive light, ‘cause I’ve got a step-dad too, and he’s more of a dad to me and my brother than my biological father.

Percy telling Sally that his signal to let her know he’s alright will be blue just about broke me. Fuck.

Orpheus!

The black figure Grover saw—I know him. Hypnos, the god of dreams. He’s a twin brother to Thanatos, the god of death. I think in some versions, Hypnos is actually female, but most people seem to agree that Hypnos is a male deity.

MOTHERFUCKER! Okay, so not Hypnos. Morpheus. I guess that makes more sense. *one google search later* Okay, I was kind of right. Morpheus is the son of Hypnos, and while Hypnos is the personification of sleep, Morpheus is the god of dreams and also has the ability to put people to sleep like Hypnos. Close, but no cigar sadly.

Nico! Why would you trick Percy?? If you just told Percy that Hades wanted to talk to him, he probably would’ve agreed, you didn’t have to lie to him.

PERSEPHONE!!!!!! And Demeter!

Demeter being a massive bitch about Persephone choosing to marry Hades is so on-brand and perfect. And that line about marrying the god of lawyers or doctors—oh my God this book is amazing.

Can we have an entire book about Hades and Persephone, please? This entire scene with all three of them is golden.

Why does Hades suck? Why did you do this to me? I had faith in you, Rick.

WHY IS PERSEPHONE SO INDIFFERENT TO ALL OF THIS?!?!??!!

ACHILLES!!!!! Wait, isn’t Achilles supposed to be blond?

Is it a coincidence that one of Greece’s most famous gay icons now stands before Nico di Angelo?

ANNABETH IS PERCY’S LIFELINE!!!! HIS TETHER, THE THING THAT KEEPS HIM HUMAN!!!!!! ToT DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY GLASS I CAN EAT

Holy fucking shit…… River Styx magic doesn’t fuck around.

Percy going on a murder rampage and nearly stabbing the god of the underworld because they threatened his dog is honestly such a mood.

*GASP* Baby Annabeth!

“The god looked at Annabeth, who was doing her big-pleading-gray-eyes thing.” The fact that Annabeth leverages puppy-dog eyes is hilarious, and the fact that Percy is so familiar with it by now implies that she’s done it on him before and that it apparently works! Oh my God, I love these children.

Also, Athena being an overprotective mother who doesn’t approve of Percy is just… Have I mentioned I love this book?

“‘This is a huge spell,’ Silena Beauregard said. ‘The bigger the spell, the easier it is to resist. If you want to sleep millions of mortals, you’ve got to cast a very thin layer of magic. Sleeping demigods is much harder.’” Yeah, that makes sense. Since the spell is bigger and spread across a greater number of people, it’s less concentrated than it would be if you wanted to just knock out two or three people.

The Hermes Cabin is just an army of Weasleys. (PJO Harry Potter au where the Weasleys are all children of Hermes and Harry is a son of Zeus when?)

“‘I’ll go with Percy,’ [Annabeth] said. ‘Then we’ll join you, or we’ll go wherever we’re needed.’ Somebody in the back of the group said, ‘No detours, you two.’ There were some giggles, but I decided to let it pass.” Everyone knows Percy and Annabeth are completely obsessed with each other.

“The girl in the lead had spiky black hair and a black leather jacket. She wore a silver circlet on her head like a princess’s tiara, which didn’t match her skull earrings or her Death to Barbie T-shirt showing a little Barbie doll with an arrow through its head.” Have I mentioned that I love Thalia? Goth-punk icon for the generations.

This is so fucking epic. I love the fast-paced battle planning stuff.

Michael Yew has a brother named Austin. I have a brother named Austin.

Percabeth. There’s that light-hearted snarky banter I’ve been craving.

Oh, yeah, since Percy’s fighting the Minotaur right now, I figured I’d make a reminder here that I forgot to write down in my first reaction post to the Lightning Thief. In the original mythology, the Minotaur was killed by Theseus, who was also, coincidentally, a son of Poseidon, so Percy slaying the Minotaur is kind of like a mirror to the original myth, even though he’s named after Perseus. But also I thought this was a good time to remind everybody that the Minotaur’s mother Pasiphae had sex with the Cretan Bull, an actual animal. Which, fun fact, is because Poseidon arranged for Aphrodite to put a spell on Pasiphae to make her fall in love with the bull. Kind of awkward that the Minotaur is technically Poseidon’s fault, and now Percy is the one that has to deal with the consequences.

“Tied around the base of each blade were lots of bead necklaces. I realized they were Camp Half-Blood beads—necklaces taken from defeated demigods.” Holy shit, that is dark. We’re really going there, huh, Rick?

Percy is a first-class badass.

Having all the monsters disintegrate when they die is a pretty clever way to avoid having to show actual blood and gore.

ANNABETH!!!!!!!!!!

“‘Percy?’ Silena Beauregard sounded like she’d been crying. ‘Plaza Hotel. You’d better come quickly and bring a healer from Apollo’s cabin. It’s… it’s Annabeth.’” NO!!! NO NO NO NO NO NO DO NOT DO THIS TO ME!! I SWEAR TO FUCK IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO ANNABETH I’M GOING TO SET MY HOUSE ON FIRE

“‘Get back!’ I slashed the air in a wide arc, driving the rest of the demigods away from Annabeth. ‘No one touches her!’” This. All of this.

Will Solace. I found the other gay one, but I can’t even be excited about that because ANNABETH IS PROBABLY GOING TO FUCKING DIE

Even when Annabeth has actual poison in her system, she cannot resist the opportunity to tease Percy for being worried about her. I’m deeply upset, but I still love them as a couple.

This entire scene is everything. Annabeth touching Percy’s weak spot—this is easily the most romantic thing I have ever read, and I read fanfiction for a hobby.

Okay, someone really needs to find this spy because they are wreaking shit and hard

I have no idea who the spy could even be. My first thought was Silena because of how prominent a character she is, but not only does that not make sense, but that would also be a fucking horrible idea. I don’t need to hurt anymore than I already do right now.

Wow. Holy shit, Nico’s life is a fucking tragedy. This child needs all the therapy after this. I’m not thrilled with this portrayal of Persephone, but it is what it is and it is fucking depressing.

What is going on with Rachel? She knows Greek now?? What is happening???

Oh, hey, Prometheus

*after learning about Luke's backstory* I can smell the redemption arc.

I feel I should mention that in the original myth, Pandora was the first woman and was created by Zeus specifically to make men's lives harder as punishment for Prometheus giving man fire, because Ancient Greece was sexist as all fuck.

HOLY SHIT!!! Percy is a first-class badass!!

Okay, so, Hyperion getting absorbed into a tree is prime nightmare fuel.

(Also, I was listening to We Will Rock You as I read this scene, which I feel is pretty apt.)

"'Yeah, baby!' a voice wailed. 'PARTY!'" Ah, I see the centaurs have joined the chat.

"The last part was because a panicked Hyperborean giant stumbled backward and sat on top of him. The lord of time disappeared under a giant blue butt." Only in Percy Jackson can you expect to read a sentence like this.

I love Dionysus being weirdly invested in Pac-Man of all things. That entire conversation between him and Percy in the bar was absolutely hysterical. Percy is such a snarky little shit and I love any interaction between him and Dionysus. It’s like watching two smart-asses trying to out-roast the other.

Sally and Paul!

Oh, no. Oh, this fucking hurts.

That fucking jar! Goddammit!

Rachel!

Annabeth, stop acting like Rachel isn’t already your friend now too. We established that last book, remember? You guys are nerd friends now.

YAS, ANNABETH! Girl held onto the outside of a crashing helicopter, and after pulling herself in, somehow managed to make sense of the controls and not only stopped the helicopter from crashing into a building, but also pulled it out of the fall to turn in a circle and hover before landing it on a New York highway with other people nearby without hitting anything or hurting anyone else. And she did all of this while the helicopter was literally seconds from crashing. Also also, technically only hours after she was stabbed in the shoulder with a knife coated in poison. *slow clap* BAMF Annabeth Chase, everyone.

“Rachel plopped down on the curb and put her head in her hands. ‘I’m sorry, Percy. I didn’t mean to… I always mess things up.’ It was kind of hard to argue with her, though I was glad she was safe.” Jesus Christ, Percy. Annabeth’s abandonment issues and poor socialization skills are not Rachel’s fault. But I guess she did just fly headfirst into a literal warzone, so I guess Annabeth’s reaction is a bit more understandable.

“I looked in the direction Annabeth had gone, but she’d disappeared into the crowd. I couldn’t believe what she’d just done—saved Rachel’s life, landed a helicopter, and walked away like it was no big deal.” Yup. You picked a good one, Percy.

"'Everybody keeps telling me to sleep,' I grumbled. 'I don't need sleep.' Chiron managed a smile. 'Have you looked at yourself recently, Percy?'" Yeah, for real, when's the last time any of these kids slept?

"You can't just abandon your family because they did something horrible." Um. Yes. Yes, you absolutely can. The abuse victim says you can. (It's me, I'm the abuse victims, and I give you full permission to tell your family to go fuck themselves if they've ever done anything horrible to you.)

I get what the message is intended to be, and what Nico's trying to say: wanting revenge is a valid feeling to have, but holding grudges and holding onto that pain and fury will not actually make you feel any better. And by refusing to help the Olympians in the fight against Kronos, not only is Hades ultimately destroying himself, but he's also inadvertently aiding in the destruction of everyone else. Zeus is really the only one that deserves Hades's revenge, but at this point Hades isn't just hurting Zeus, he's hurting everyone, and when you cross the line of hurting innocent people in your quest to hurt the one that's actually guilty, your desire and quest for revenge is no longer justified. And if you've reached the point of hurting innocent people for no other reason than to make yourself feel better, then you really are no better than the person who hurt you in the first place. But none of this has anything to do with the so-called sanctity of "family".

We really need to find this fucking spy. They're running everything.

CLARISSE!!!!! YAY CLARISSE IS BACK!!!!!!

"Through her war helmet, I could only see her eyes—but I could tell something was wrong. Her blue eyes shone with fear. Clarisse never looked like that. And she didn't have blue eyes." Wait, what? What's going on????

"I looked down at the dying face of Silena Beauregard." WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!!????!!! WHY?!!??!!!??? WHY DID SILENA HAVE TO DIE?!??!! HAS SHE NOT BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH ALREADY?!??!!!

"Silena opened her hand. In her palm was a silver bracelet with a scythe charm, the mark of Kronos." WHAT

This entire chapter is literally nothing but pain.

"Standing at the foot of Zeus's throne, looking up at the stars, was Rachel Elizabeth Dare. She was holding a Greek ceramic vase." Oh no.

"[Rachel] focused on me as if she were coming out of a dream. 'I found it. It's Pandora's jar, isn't it?'" OH NO

"Her eyes were brighter than usual, and I had a bad flashback of moldy sandwiches and burned cookies." OH FUCK

"I picked up Pandora's jar. The spirit of Hope fluttered inside, trying to warm the cold container. 'Hestia,' I said, 'I give this to you as an offering.' The goddess tilted her head. 'I am the least of the gods. Why would you trust me with this?' 'You're the last Olympian,' I said." Title drop! It's all coming together!

This is the hypest thing I have read in years.

Chiron! Please don't die, I am literally begging you.

NICO'S BACK!

Everyone here is a fucking badass

Paul just stabbed a monster with a sword, and Sally fucking shot another one! In stories like these with divine powers and weapons that begin and end with stabbing, you are not expecting someone to just pull out a fucking gun and shoot the thing. I love this book.

"'Thalia!' Grover cried. When the dust cleared and the mountain stopped rocking, we found her still alive, but her legs were pinned under the statue." Holy fucking shit!

"Annabeth wipes her tears away. 'There was a time I thought… well, I thought…' She looked at me, like she was drinking in the fact that I was still here. And I realized I was doing the same thing. The world was collapsing, and the only thing that really mattered to me was that she was alive." Love. Just love. It's beautiful and heartbreaking and I love these kids so much and I'm so glad they found each other.

"I turned and faced the Olympians. 'We need a shroud,' I announced, my voice cracking. 'A shroud for the son of Hermes.'" I mean…… What can I even say?

Percy's wish is everything.

OKAY, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING TO RACHEL?!??! Someone really needs to do something about this!

I love that Percy refers to Blackjack as his pegasus.

RAINBOW! <3

Oh! She has the gift of prophecy! Now that makes sense!

Wait. OH, FUCK!!

Okay, I'm glad Rachel is okay, but these fucking prophecies, man! We literally just got done with the Great Prophecy, but now there's another one we have to deal with?! Don't get me wrong, I'm still gonna read it and I'll probably love it, but still!

The moment when Percy and Annabeth finally get together is everything I ever hoped for, and it completely justifies every goddamn fake-out leading up to this point. I'm just so happy right now

That ending, man..... This book series is amazing. I'm so glad I was able to fall in love with it without knowing any significant spoilers. I cannot wait to read The Heroes of Olympus. Maybe I'll do a reaction series for that too.

[aprillikesthings]

I have flipped the laundry and put the towels away and re-made the bed, I have made dinner and done a load of dishes, it's time for more She-Ra!

s5 ep4 Stranded

but first do you want to see my dinner

Rice Cabbage stir-fried in light sesame oil w/ garlic A couple of eggs Sesame seeds

SO SIMPLE but so good!!! Seriously this turned out perfect. God damn.

BUT TIME FOR CARTOON

Adora: "Let me get this straight: Catra saved you from Horde Prime?"

lol

pfft

Man I am not going to screenshot all the things her face does in a few seconds, but remember waaaaaay early on when I was comparing their facial expressions when Catra and Adora hear each other's names, to that scene in Arcane where Vi realizes Caitlyn is into women, and Vi's face says a TON of things in 1.5 seconds? Adora's face here goes on a JOURNEY: confusion, shock (as shown above), anger, something I can only describe as "well I obviously have to rethink some things"/"maybe I've been wrong about her this whole time", some kind of fatigue tinged with regret, and then she slides down the wall to sitting.

It's just really well done.

Also I know there's a ton of videos showing the progression between Catra and Adora in the last season and I am forcing myself not to watch them or any of the meme videos until I AM DONE WITH THE SHOW because I don't want to dilute the emotional impact of watching them when I get to them.

Anyway Glimmer goes to apologize for the shit she did to make everything go to hell on Etheria, but then the ship goes bumpy bump and stops moving. But yeah Bow is keeping his distance from Glimmer right now.

So Glimmer sobs in Adora's arms instead. And the ship goes bumpty again. Entrapta says it's because they're out of fuel crystals but there's a planet with some nearby.

Aw there's a lovely interaction between Scorpia and Swift Wind back on Etheria.

Back to Space:

I've just noticed it looks like a ship anchor, which I assume is deliberate, since it would be Horde Prime's "anchor" on a planet.

Yeah Bow's still mad about it.

I love Entrapta (she's talking about how the old fuel crystals are probably fused to the engine by now)

LOL THE SHIP (Darla) RESPONDS "I do not feel pain" and Entrapta immediately smiles again "oh okay!"

pFFT

she WAGGLES HER EYEBROWS AHAHAHAH

*looks at Adora* *looks at Vi* *thinks about how I've wanted to cosplay both Catra and Caitlyn*

hm. *side-eyeing self*

EDIT: ALSO THEY BOTH WEAR RED JACKETS LOLOL

Anyway Adora fell in a hole

Glimmer: "Just stay put, we're coming. We'll have to find another way down." Adora: "I think I see a light. I'm gonna go towards it." Bow, freaking out: "Don't go towards the light!"

LOLOL

And Swift Wind does a little story-telling into the sky about how things are going on Etheria. It's cute.

And Adora gets in a fight with other people looking for fuel crystals.

They're also from a planet Horde Prime destroyed. Also it turns out the crystals are nearly impossible to get to.

awwww

and then "he has to pay for what he did! And he--he has someone on his ship. Someone I--" and she looks back and forth and then stands up straight again. "We're stopping him! Period."

BAHAHAH

"if your friend is with Horde Prime, it's already too late"

"I mean, she used to be, but that was a long time ago,"

"but then she saved Glimmer. And maybe that means there's still good in her, and now, I don't know, it's--"

BAHAHA (remember when that was a relationship option on facebook? "It's complicated"?)

(lol I accidentally closed the tab and had to reopen it and it wouldn't let me take this without the rating???)

Anyway they're all like, Nobody stands up to Prime and survives.

They all head out to find the fuel crystals but there's a bunch of earthquakes and they have to GET THE FUCK OUT, and as their only way out starts to collapse--

Adora manages to make a way out!

Entrapta is like, that was She-Ra, obviously

ANYWAY there's some lovely derring-do and Glimmer gets the fuel crystals, Bow saves her life a couple of times over, and everyone makes it out of the cave before it collapses. Then the star kids (who haven't seen magic in centuries) offer to join the cause.

Back on the ship, Glimmer does an amazing apology speech to Bow:

Glimmer: "Look, I know you're still mad at me. Maybe you'll be mad at me for a really long time. I deserve it. And maybe--maybe we'll--maybe we'll never be friends like we used to be. But I'm not going to stop trying to make it better. I made a mistake with the Heart of Etheria. I should have listened to you, and I'm sorry. You get to be mad, for as long as you need to be. But I'm not going anywhere. And when you're ready, I'll be here."

And Bow accepts her apology

And Adora watches, and then turns and looks out the window

Are you thinking of someone you'd maybe like to reconnect with? To maybe forgive? hm?????

LOL I SPOKE TOO SOON Bow and Glimmer notice the way Adora is staring into the stars and ask if she's okay

"and I know Catra was our enemy and she's done a lot of bad things, and hurt a lot of people, but--

;_;

the poor thing. she's so torn up about it.

Glimmer: "Whatever you need to do, I'm with you." Bow: "Then let's do this. Best Friend Squad style."

And there's a group hug.

AND SWIFT WIND FELT ADORA DO THE SHE-RA THING even if only for that few seconds, wooo!

End of episode! Roll credits!

OH GOD THE NEXT ONE IS SAVE THE CAT

AAAAHHHHHHH okay first I gotta flip the laundry again

[mysteriouslybluepirate]

Watching Con O'Neill's old stuff cause it's fun. Day #?- Ordinary lies-EPISODE 1

I am going, to be honest. I don't know how to tag this without 'ruining it' look up the warnings on your own? Tell me below in the comments those of you who have seen this how you would tag warnings for this. Just take this meme and go googling.

UPDATED CON RANKINGS DOWN BELOW! Also, for anyone who doesn't know, I finally have a tag for this series! It's easy to find now!

As always thanks to @ivegotnonameidea for the love

Some people I follow who I think have seen this and I'd love their opinions @cliffcostello @gydima @dianetastesmetal @mossiestpiglet(if you haven't seen this, just ignore me. Or go read the warnings and watch it?)

Thoughts below, I'd love to hear yours.

(IS IT BETTER TO KNOW OR NEVER HAVE KNOWN)

SPOILERS FROM HERE ON OUT BABES! ITS A WILD RIDE! For me this is almost as emotional as Joe Meek from Telstar. So....YEAH.

Con being the first name in the credits?

DAD ROCK CON!

AHHH, smiling. A sign of more to come

OHH! Cringe boss/coworker Con! I love it. I've seen a gif of this speech out of context and thought he'd be an ass.

What job is he doing?

JOE! That name has no Con O'Neill associations.

"I don't assemble teams based on the basis of who might fuck eachother" JOE I LOVE YOU

I know that head of hair! Hey Joel Fry!

As someone who worked at a warehouse, they've got the energy down. "I will just, leave them here, for you" Yeah, real.

DONT WALK BACKWARDS IN A WARHOUSE

WHAT THE FUCK!

(As someone who has dropped a boxed up sewing machine on my head from about that height, the boy's going to need help. If he suddenly becomes 'crazy' ill be a bit peeved.)

Also, most pallets for warehouses are stacked bottom heavy. We don't know the freight they ship, but still. The only reason heavy stock was on top is if the whole pallet was heavy. (I get that they had to drop empty boxes on Con for ~Safety~ but they could have edited snappier)

Headache? Do you know what helps? GOING TO THE HOSPITAL WHEN YOU HAVE AFFORDABLE HEALTHCARE!

I'm calling it. The wife is cheating on him. Joe's not allowed to be happy.

AHHH! They won't let him drive! Love it.

I LOVE HIS JACKET!

This over-the-bed shot was necessary, and I love it

Oh, look at him. Community leader.

So he's insecure, has a shaky relationship with his family, and is semi-committed to work? LOVE IT

No Joe, partners don't snoop at their partner's phones.

NO, CHEATING WOULDN'T BE GOOD HERE?!?!

Also, that fucking look Joe gave him. love it.

GOD CAN PEOPLE JUST FUCKING TALK?

If he cheats in retaliation, this will start a circle of cheating and bullshit. Speaking from life, don't put your kids through that.

Actually, this is the most realistic portrayal of warehouse managers. Especially ignoring basic safety rules for a laugh. The only thing they messed up on was doing it in front of the cameras. Managers know better.

BRO

DON'T PUT CAMERAS IN YOUR OWN HOME

I know Joel is a superhero which just makes this scene fun.

As paranoid as I am with my space, I like to think I'd notice.

EXACTLY TECH GUY. Trust is mandatory. Wait, don't threaten physical harm, that's a bit much

He's trying to be fun, but god. OH HIS YODA IS SO FUN

Going to a bar with coworkers sounds awful

I hope my life pushes me to follow the narrative as hard as it's convincing Joe that his wife is cheating on him.

Maybe don't fuck your coworkers?

BRO DOING THE WEIRD STALKER THINGS AFTER WORK?

Joe is going to a meeting, at least he's proactive.

NOT AT WORK? THE FUCK.

GAY? Gay cheating or do they just have long hair?

Yeah, he's having a good day. 10/10

Why is the PA at his desk? What the fuck? Even if he wasn't paranoid, it's still wrong if he's upper management.

(Smoke alarm scene) Oh joy, the cards come crumbling. Also, I don't know when this was published, but they definitely had small enough cameras to fit inside a working smoke alarm.

SHE DOESN'T TRUST HIM TO TALK THIS OUT? At least entertain the thought that your teenager is smoking?

Ohh he's quizzing her to see if she's cheating, bro don't look too suspicious.

BRO IF YOU'RE UNHAPPY ENOUGH TO CHEAT JUST FUCKING TALK ABOUT GETTING A DIVORCE!

I love this adventure outfit.

What did he expect? They don't supply the mountain with 4g

Aww he's in recovery, it'd be a shame if, over the course of this episode, he slipped up :|

'Good Time Joe' :( (also, this is just going to make me sad, huh)

Good for him. But not including his wife/kids is kind of saying a lot.

That looks like a nice sleeping bag!

Oh shit, that's a walk. Good thing you didn't tell anyone where you were going. :\ he's asking to get murdered

Yeah, babe. This is creepy. Please evaluate your actions.

Yeah, this scene is sweet.

BRO DON'T ACT LIKE THIS SUDDEN EVASION OF PRIVACY

Wait, did he accidentally out his kid's relationship? Is that what I'm supposed to gather from this?

WHY IS HE CASUALLY FLICKERING A LIGHTER?

Also, if this is something 'serious' please tell me this wasn't the era when weed was the worst tv would do

I feel like this talk would be easier if you didn't make eye contact

INSTALLING THE CAMERAS GAVE HIM TOO MUCH FUCKING INFO. God, that's funny as fuck.

She needs to stop fucking new employees, it's an HR issue

This whole meet-up scene is nice

IT IS BETTER TO HAVE NEVER FOUND OUT BABE. Life is a mystery and being able to find out is an issue. In fact, you can stop whenever you want. Like, now?

Teenage daughter is drinking, calling it now.

OH SHIT, THE WIFE?

Okay, maybe the two women are just really close friends.

SHE GRABBED HER FACE, THAT'S CODE FOR FUCKING

Also, even I don't know that I'd keep alcohol in the house if Joe is known to drink instead of reaching out for help. Obviously, everyone has different limits, but eh. Feels courteous at least.

Joe is not having a good time. If I need to pause for embarrassment reasons, I'll say.

OH SHIT JOE. THAT'S NOT GOOD.

"It's not porn" If you think your wife is fucking someone, and you caught it on camera, that's porn.

Look, say what you will. But it looks like she cares as his boss/equal.

He's not himself cause he's scared.

"How would you rate that assessment?" "6/10" BRO

Just tell her. About the cheating at least.

See, Joe is just coming to this realization. This is the healthiest mindset to respect people's boundaries.

No, you don't have a right to know everything. AHHH HE LOOKED AT THE CAMERA OMG THAT WAS SO GOOD.

YES! IT'S A NEW ADDICTION GOD THAT'S SO SMART! AHHHHH

Good! Look at him apologizing. An Adult.

Also, their business is heavily dependent on people's excess income. As hard as he can try, he's fucked living with the economy as his ruler. Sad honestly.

I haven't mentioned that he's spying in the bathroom now instead of the desk, but god is that unhygienic.

You know what, I have some hope for him.

IS THAT A GUY? Threesome? Foursome? Wait, what pamphlet? Are they close to scoping him out?

ITS DANGEROUS BULLSHIT TIME

It's probably just her coworkers, right? This is all an innocent mistake?

OH HE'S TAILING THEM! That is so BALLSEY!

How the fuck is he going to explain himself if they catch him?

OH SHE CATCHES PREDATORS! OH MY GOD!

ICON

FUCKING HERO

HELL YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! OH GOD

What? What am I missing? Oh SHIT.

OH SHIT.

GOD HE'S A GOOD FUCKING DAD. LOOK HE'S SO FUCKING GOOD GOD!

AHHHHHHHH

Look as shitty as it is, he has a point.

Violence won't do shit, and neither will entrapment.

OH FUCK

OH SHIT

OH MY GOD

NOOOOOOO

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT

WHAT???!?!?1?!?!??!?!?!?!?!

GOD AT LEAST HE HAS PROOF!?!?!?!?!? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

Jesus. Just get a divorce.

OH SHE DID ACTUALLY CHEAT

HE DIDN'T EVEN GET PROOF! DID SHE ACCIDENTLY LET SOMETHING SLIP?

Okay, Jesus, get a divorce.

FUCK.

No, let her do this, hit him.

How the fuck does he not know what statutory rape is in this instance? This is a really fucking good episode but Jesus Christ, that fucking neggs me.

ME FUCKING TOO JOE. WAIT THATS BOOZE. NO

NO

FUUUUUCCKKK

At least he immediately went to go see someone in his support system (his daughter) after relapsing.

___________________________________________________________

CON: FUCKING 10/10. I don't even know where to begin. I am so fucking happy I wasn't spoiled for shit besides his opening speech and seeing gifs of his chest. He plays Joe as a raw, damaged individual who just wants to protect himself and his family. I have entire fucking essays I want to write on his performance.

What Joe needs is a support group. I know he's in other episodes, and the entire point of this show is that people live Ordinary Lives, but just knowing how bad he's struggling, it seems cruel to me. Real in a way I want media to clean up nicely with a bow. He's reaching a new low in his life, and fuck! If yall tell me other episodes have more prominent Joe scenes, I will absolutely watch it.

Yes, I've seen "Let me buy you a drink! Tier Five Friday, whoo whoo?" and a few other clips of Joe and Joel Fry's character. AND ITS SAD, regardless of how funny it is. I'm so fucking weak for this depressed man.

It just hurts cause I know he can work to be happier.

If he thinks she's willing to cheat, he doesn't trust their relationship to hold.

But with how he feels like he's failed them as a protector, losing them could fucking break them more. As I mentioned sports supplies are an excess funds type product. Imagine if all of this shit was going on, AND a recession hits, and his position at work was threatened? I was laid off from my warehouse job THREE MONTHS before peak just because profits were low. Joe having a record of assaulting staff and unsafe workmanship on the floor could be enough to lose his job if things get tight.

I want to give this man a fucking happy ending, a partner who he can trust and have these discussions with, and a better fucking support system.

I know my 'as I watch' summary seems disjointed but my original one without editing was too long for Tumblr. It included me just fucking hitting my keyboard. LOTS OF FUCCKKKKKS. Etc, you get my point. I want to rewatch this to see all the nuances with full context, and also never think about this again cause I will explode it's so fucking good.

For Joe's final thoughts, who's better to give final words than Con himself?

"I feel for him. I wouldn't do what he does – but I understand why he does it."

Characters besides Con: 9/10. A few small things bugged me. But eh. They are people as Joe sees them. I'm sure if I watched other episodes these people would be more fleshed out.

Story 9/10: I love that this was a mystery drama in the truest sense of the word. We were meant to solve things along with Joe until the rug was pulled from under us. WE WERE THE OBSERVING EYES BUT WE WEREN'T ALL-KNOWING. The audience wasn't God. We went from thinking he was weird to even considering this, but Jesus. He caught his son doing one of the fucking worst things he could have possibly done.

Again, I know fuck ups exist in every goddamn family. But the son is old enough to have been aware of what happened to his sister when it happened. The son knew exactly what happened to his sister and still did what he did. Again, it's real, but it just feels like so much shit stacked on top of Joe's shoulders at the last fucking second to make him break. I feel for the Mom and Daughter but they were kind of side stories here we barely got to see.

Everything unravels from the audience at first thinking Joe is weird, to OH MY GOD?!??!?! Is a delight. If a mystery is served to us like this, I will eat it the fuck up.

Overall: 10/10. I fucking love this hour of television. We got so many scenes of Joe just slightly breaking down as everyone around him wouldn't just be honest with him. He had to break down in the last ten minutes, and we the audience had no clue just how shitty the situation was. If you want me to watch more, don't be afraid to fully spoil the cool stuff down below. If I didn't care more about keeping a 'scale' this would be a 11/10+.

Again, everyone in S is essentially interchangeable.

I will add his bit roles if needs be. Or if I'm bored! (Update-2/23/2023 to include recent bit roles)

As always, have a good day. Or night. I'm writing this at 1 in the morning so hopefully, it's understandable. Please throw up words below, it always makes my day!

[livvyofthelake]

special edition show i haven't really seen you complain and/or talk about in a while: 7 8 & 12 for julie&the phantoms, shadow and bone and the wilds

oof the wilds….. that was an ERA fr. also what are you TALKING about including shadow and bone as something i haven’t talked about in a while….. i’m IN my alina era rn…… well ok let’s do this

7) what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

for julie i don’t hate anyone but lowkey i kinda hate those boys on the grounds of the fact that before i watched the show every post i had seen about it was ONLY about the boys and i didn’t even know who julie was or what she looked like because no one ever talked about her despite her being THE TITULAR CHARACTER like come on besties… for shadow and bone i’m not involved in fandom for that but from what i remember seeing back when season one came out and people were talking about it was that there was SO MUCH discourse about kirigan/aleksander/the darkling whatever the FUCK i’m supposed to call that man. well that didn’t make me hate the character but it DID make me realize that fandom was annoying as hell. the wilds… idk i don’t think i hate any fan favorites in the wilds. i think some people went too hard for shelby and toni tho. oh actually and kirin. yes i know i participated in loving that guy. i’m different tho. i’m never the problem haven’t you heard….

8) common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

i don’t think i know any fandom opinions about julie i’ve never really engaged with that. i assume though that there are people that ship luke and reggie and call julie a lesbian to push her out of the way. so that. no i don’t know that, i don’t know what i’m talking about I’ve just been around the block and i assume that’s a thing people in fandom do/did. shadow and bone…. well i think discoursing about whatever the hell his name is is dumb. i haven’t read the books yet but he’s well written enough in the show that there’s clear nuance we don’t have to do black and white morality discourse idk. as for the wilds…. when people were arguing about who we should ship for a potential third season and everyone was like omg martha and bo!! like. 😐 just say you want my girl martha to die goddamn. also true about every martha ship people tried to push. all of them would have been bad sorry. except maybe one. which i won’t say. unless….

12) the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

well. JULIE. oh my god why does no one talk about julie ever it’s ridiculous she is the TITULAR CHARACTER…. like was i just in an insane bubble at that time or something?? well i still never see anyone talk about julie when they talk about the show so idk. idk but i love julie a lot she’s my favorite :) this is also true for alina but i’m definitely in a bubble for that one. hm idk what the widely disliked in fandom characters are in shadow and bone so i can’t really speak on this one. do people hate mal? i’m just guessing that based on his gale-ism, there’s probably people that hate him right? well EYE think he’s neat, he’s alina’s best friend, they’ve been there for each other nearly all their lives…. he’s a brave man but deep down he’d rather be taming horses…. i like him!!! and the wilds. well. i liked raf, nobody else liked raf, he had that problematic swag and those big brown eyes he was like a pathetic little lamb to me idk. also leah but i think people warmed up to leah in s2, more people didn’t like her in s1. so like we won on the leah front fr!!

[hertwood]

dts s5 e3-5

e3: -"i am perfect 🥰" fuck u know what sometimes the charles leclerc charm does get to me ngl -"breaking america is very important" OH IS IT. let andretti join then -i'll say it. miami isn't that bad. you can critisize the consumerism of it all without being so anti-america yall -fuck caitlyn jenner but her gushing to christian horner abt how great it is that ferrari is winning is iconic -i did watch this season but i did after the fact /knowing/ max was gonna win in the end. its sorta hitting me how it did really look like, oh my god, charles could really win here. just lookin at his lil face thinking how much did he get his hopes up. how much did i hurt, watching it slip away. how do u even handle that emotionally -i know i've talked abt this before but when i was binging the 2022 season i got super drunk before/while watching miami and when i woke up in the morning i remembered basically nothing other than carlos taking his shirt off (priorities). i watched the race highlights sober and was surprised by the lando crash. lol -if anything this rewatch is putting me back in my max girlie era. chomp chomp chomp. and/or i'm ovulating. combination of both -cannot wait for padel game 2023 edition on dts. it will be superior i know it -i do think its wierd that theyre framing (trying to) prioritize charles as a mean thing to do when its exactly what merc did in 2021 for lewis and it was 100% necessary both times. the guy who said 'ferrari won with the wrong car' wasnt wrong thats just how this shit works!!! -idk why dts couldn't just explain that max has non terminal but non fixable damage and thats why he was so damn slow. i feel like it wouldve been so easy to just mention. give context to why he couldnt get back up there -i dont think having multiple episodes focus on the same race from different perspectives is the worst thing ever, but i do think they fucked it up here by having the silverstone episodes back 2 back 2 back...... at least mix it up a lil. put another episode inbetween so we've forgotten by the time its being rehashed is it rly that hard

e4: -"i would've fucked the whole paddock" you know what maybe gunther IS iconic. maybe i will miss him a lil -i'm not a mick girlie but he is such a sweet boy. gunther count ur days :) -being reminded that michael and jos were teammates is such a jumpscare. how did that happen -"its not about proving them wrong, its about proving yourself right." HES SUCH A SMART N WISE LIL BOY. MWAH MWAH MWAH -that was a legitimately terrifying high speed crash. like a crash is a crash but the way that car got torn up is insane -STAY AWAY FROM OLLIE BEARMAN BTW -kevin supporting mick is So Important like an older sibling trying to break the cycle w/ a shitty parent. kevin i love u -ALSO underrated ship. btw -respectfully. as someone who knows nothing abt cars. if the haas keeps having problems splitting in half during crashes mayb. its a car issue. just a thought -faldskjfalksjf but this monaco crash: thinkin abt during the race, kevin had a mechanical dnf nearly the same time, so when the camera cut from mick's smashed car to kevin standing on the side of the track, looking disappointed, there was legitimate confusion on who fucking crashed. anyway that goes to show MAYBE THE CAR IS JUST SHIT -sebmick. is indeed. important -i love the way mick thinks his name is only a blessing. i just love seeing other people be brutally positive in the face of adversity bc its what i aspire to try to do too. its a good mindset to have i hope he is doin well now <3 -small children humbling tf out of christian horner is so important actually -i'm so glad daniel knew what he was worth with haas. i'm so glad they couldn't damn afford him. as he should 💅 -mick & max ALSO underrated ship. this man is so shippable -i am glad max n mick got to have this lil battle tho. they got to have what their dads predicted finally :)

e5: -ok so this is actually the most recent dts episode ive seen since before i started the rewatch, right after otmar got fired i watched it as a fun lil victory lap. this'll be fun lets goooooooo -otmar as a man is such a walking ick. even if i dislike other TPs at least they dont give me the ick. thats the second most unforgivable crime otmar has committed -i'm sorry the way otmar left AM bc he didnt like lawrence as a boss only to sign up to work for LAURENT ROSSI????? u have to laugh -i've said it before and i'll say it again nando n estie were fucking raw 100% -even if mclaren continued to be shit and alpine didn't implode oscar still made the right choice bc CLEARLY otmar was keen on keeping the nandoestie lineup for as long as fucking possible. and then he gets mad when oscar realizes that and bails??? i hate this man sm -'je m'appelle yuki. merci' iconic dts quote. yall if dts didnt exist we wouldnt have this be grateful -ok. so i know when this season came out this whole dando in the parking garage bit got some heat bc apparently that was not at paul ricard like the episode implies. but honestly. listen. netflix got a fun lil moment with daniel and lando. they didnt have anywhere else to put it. was there really any harm with having it squeezed in there. its not like ppl thinking theres a parking garage at paul ricard is super damaging misinformation. pls find real solid criticisms of dts instead of this kinda bitchin and moanin THANK U -HI SEBCHAL CRUMBS -ok um. not 2 tinhat here but i know dts got some heat for not having enough women in this season. did they go back and add these bits with jennie gow after she recovered from her stroke i dont remember her being here. its fine i just dont particularly like how netflix can go back n change shit -i hate birthdays i get so much second hand cringe from this. if i never get sung happy birthday again ever in my life that would be ideal -how many times has nando left and gone back to renault/alpine? god its like a girl who wont stop getting back together with a cheating bf and then being surprised when he cheats again oh fernando left ur team WATER IS WET BABES -ok what i'm getting is otmar is bad at getting contracts finalized in a timely manner and maybe this is his damn fault :) -'lets show him he made the wrong choice' you have to laugh ladjfaklsjdfaljd

[cantdanceflynn]

My fair goalie is a great episode! I like the part where Heinz is sick and Perry puts a blanket over him, and the ‘nostrils’ is funny for a team name. Every part of that episode does seem quite well put together!

Lawrence is incredible in that episode, I think it’s one of the best examples of his personality. He’s very mild-mannered, and he’s willing to let himself lose just so his brother is happy. But he’s also very talented! He just doesn’t show it unless he has a reason to: and Linda asking him to show it is a good reason for him, it’s always nice to see their relationship, it’s wholesome.

The Candace plot of the episode is also really entertaining, the being a lady song gets stuck in my head all the time, it’s really great.

Eliza is an interesting character as well, I kind of wish that she had another episode or two. Her family presumably lives in England, so I think they should have been mentioned whenever the Flynn-Fletchers visited England. Also, she has way too many brothers, lmao.

Professor Ross Eford is also a genius palindrome- I think it’s interesting worldbuilding to introduce a concept like “palindromes were feared in the fifties”. We can see how that old superstition still exists in the modern day, with how that kid realized Ross had a palindrome name and their mother clearly still has some prejudice for palindromes. I think the implications of this would be really interesting! And since palindromes aren’t a controversial topic in the real world, I think that would be a really great opportunity for Phineas and Ferb to tackle the concept of discrimination. It would be really interesting to have an episode where someone has a palindrome name and is bullied and Phineas and Ferb’s big idea of the day could be teaching everyone that it’s okay to have a palindrome name! Buford could be the bully, maybe he learned that palindromes were bad from an older relative, and over the course of the episode he realizes that there’s nothing wrong with palindromes. Also, given that ‘madam’ is a palindrome, it could be interesting to have interactions where an older woman from the fifties is called madam and she gets offended at being called a palindrome.

Let’s not forget Ferb, either! Ferb is great in that episode. Honestly, the ‘curse’ thing could tie into the palindrome superstition in a really interesting way if they’d wanted to go that route, but the ending where the curse is broken and they still lose is also really great. ‘Sometimes you just miss’ is a good moral, because it also serves to debunk superstition. Sometimes you just miss, there doesn’t have to be a supernatural explanation for everything. I also really love the bit at the beginning when Buford comes by and gives Ferb all that American stuff in that big sack. It’s really brilliant! I also like the end credits, when Ferb says he’s not a Brit or a Yank, he’s just Ferb. When I saw that part I was struck by an irrational urge to edit the scene so he was saying that in response to being asked what his gender was.. non-binary Ferb is all powerful, I suppose. But honestly it is a really nice sentiment. That episode goes all in on the American vs British stuff, but that ending takes a step back to remind the audience that it’s all just for fun, and no one actually has to be defined by where they live or where they came from. They can just be!

Also Baljeet screaming in the hat. Need I say more? Hilarious.

SGJIDGJSGIJSGISGJ YEA!!!

EXACTLY LAWRENCE IS SOSOSSOSO PRECIOUSSSSSS ILHSM HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH LINDA IS INDEED SO WHOLESOME

AND SOSOSOSOSO TRUE THAT SONG GOD I LOVE THAT SONG IDK WHY ITS SO GOOD BUT IT ISSS

AND OH MY GOD YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE FANON IVE BUILT UP ABOUT ELIZA SHE IS DEFINITELY ONE OF MY FAVORITE ONE-OFF CHARACTERS (AND ALSO I HAVE PROBABLY THE MOST CRACK SHIPS OF ALL CRACK SHIPS W HER, ELIZA X LACIE. THE LESBIAN POTENTIAL IG)

AND THE PALINDROME LORE IS GOOD YEA BUT I FEEL LIKE W THE CAST THEY'VE GOT FOR THAT(I MEAN, EVEN WOUT THE QUEER UNDERTONES, ISABELLA BALJEET AND STACY(AT THE VERY LEAST!!!) ARE RIGHT THERE) ITD JUST FEEL SHITTY AND PATRONIZING. I JUST DONT THINK THATS HOW THEY SHOULD TACKLE IT WHEN THEY HAVE GENUINE MINORITIES THERE COMPARED TO A GOOD PIECE OF BACKGROUND LORE YA KNOW?

AND FERB IS SOSOSSOSOSSOSOSO WONDERFUL IN THIS EP INDEED!!!! ITD BE A LIL WEIRD IF HE WASNT OBVIOUSLY BUT STILL LOL ENBY FERB REAL

ALSO FOR VERY SPECIFIC REASONS IRVING BEING THE ONE OUT OF EVERYONE TO CONVINCE FERB TO COME BACK MEANS THE WORLD TO ME :)