#dude this is kinda overwhelming
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in CONquest
holy fuck
#dude this is kinda overwhelming#i don’t even have a ticket i jus#w o a h#dude i saw a few niji cosplayers here and there#a fucking ALBAN COSPLAYER PASSED BY ME A WHILE AGO HOLY FUCK#i also saw a Mysta cosplayer and a Reimu cosplayer#and an Enna one too#now im jus lookin for more Niji cosplayers mannn#that was stupid#<= (a tag for me speaking)#idk anymore#<= (also a tag for me speaking)
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shuake week day 2 - new game plus
plus, bonus!
#shuake week 2023#oof my art i guess#persona 5#goro akechi#akira kurusu#shuake#this is soooooooo incredibly silly goofy#there was this one post floating around on Twitter abt how akira had a matching pair of gloves when he did ng+#and I went “ok but make it bigger#and like it’s silly yes but it’s also the tragedy of repeating the same events with the hope that they’ll turn out differently#until you’re physically overwhelmed with the reminder that no matter what you do you cannot change the fate of the person you love#idk I’m Crazy abt them dude#the angst spawned out of nowhere tbh she was a last minute addition#also this whole thing is kinda sketchy and rough but like I work full time during the summer#and I think I’d explode if I was dropping a fully rendered piece every day#so here we are#still a fun silly time regardless I hope!!#if all goes well I’ll be back tomorrow with another :))
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#the weirdest thing about being on zoloft is i can barely cry anymore#like i get teary eyed but i don’t actually cry#at most i’ll get like on tear even if i’m really upset#*one tear#it’s just wild because i used to cry so easily over everything#esp stuff that was like. touching?#and any time i got overwhelmed by how much i love stuff#even like orchestral music would make me cry a lot lmfao#idk dude it’s a weird experience for me now just. not having that happen#kinda miss the emotional release sometimes#personal#to be deleted#but rarely experiencing anxiety is soooooooo so nice like#i can’t believe people live like this without medication like damn#also very nice not feeling depressed
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trying to get my creative gears running again !!
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#oc#doodles#pink space#blue space#not a zip file#blagh blagh! hello it's me :D#i think i'm in some sort of rut rn.. workin on it though >:3#//i REALLY love this shading method!!#solid cell-shading is vv nice but this feels so much more fun to me lol :>#//i keep waking up w/ like headaches and if i don't wake up with a headache then i get it only a couple hours waking up which kinda sucks ?#no idea what's up with that man. and it's just a Liiiittle bit annoying ykno what i mean#and it's screwing with my focus !! not cool dude. not cool#this has been going on for. some days now but i dunno i dunno lol#//also i wanna work on these three projects but i!! keep getting overwhelmed with How Much i absolutely WANT to do#system overload! so i end up sitting around with nothing to do for like. a thousand hours hfbsh#//BY THE WAY i helped make tartar sauce the other day and i'm v pleased with that feat :DD#it tasted good!#i did something else the second day after that but i forget loll#//okay now i'm going to try to do. something hsbfvhsb#/8 posts to 2000 !! >:33
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I haven't been on this account in a hot min 😭
#im gonna try to be here more often & switch between this acc and my fandom one#updates: im still kinda isolated a bit BUT i hung out with one of my friends last week#he took me to dave & busters and i havent been there since i was a kid#the arcade games are SO MUCH now dnjdis#also it was so loud and overwhelming but overall was a chill night!#despite the almost-panic attack 😅#also saw my best friend the other day and we strated watching good omens!!#and im gonna both of them again tomorrow 🥰🥰#also my best friend is kicking our mutually-former friend out of his house due to loooots of stuff#so once they move out ill be able to go to his house and see him a lot more often 🥺#am excited i miss that dude a lot :(#but yeah thats about all ive done the past month 🫠#bugs agere journal
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went somewhere with my husband and his dad today (to pick up my in-laws' "new" camper van). the guys that were selling it had a baby with them and it was so freaking adorable. so I kept making silly faces and hiding for a few seconds and that kind of stuff to make the baby laugh (it was fun!). anyway, after a while one of the guys asked when my husband and I are having kids and I just went like oh never. we have two cats, that's enough, and most babies aren't as cute as that one anyway so nope not interested in that.
#there's a possibility with the way that the initial question was phrased that he might have thought I was pregnant#nah dude I'm just fat#but I just ignored that possibility and it was fine!#I don't think I've ever had anyone outright assume that I'm pregnant and I would have expected it to feel really bad#but it was just fine! I'm fat and my stomach is big and I look like a woman and apparently playing with a baby means you want kids so I can#kinda see the logic#and anyway it was ambivalent enough that he might really just have meant it in general#they were really nice so I'm just going to assume that :)#I think I would have handled that totally differently before (mostly before the anxiety meds really)#it would have felt awful then - just the thought that he MIGHT have meant that#and now it's just a funny thing that happened and that I feel completely okay about :)#(and that baby really was ridiculously adorable! I don't like babies in general but ugh it was so cute)#also I think I handled like the whole day really really well!! I suggested things and asked questions and didn't feel uncomfortable at any#point!!#we went to McDonald's and that's something that was completely overwhelming for me before#now... I didn't even think about it!! we just went there! we went inside I did a lot of things that would have been hard before and it was#just fine!#I just felt like. I'm allowed to exist. I'm allowed to be here. I'm not in the way I'm not wrong I'm not bad#it all just happened and there was no anxiety no panic no awful thoughts. I wasn't afraid at any point. not even a little.#(I think. it's hard to remember now but I think that's a good sign too!)#personal#anxiety meds my beloved
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apparently chris who is most known for being in mr beast videos is trans now but the situation around it feels so...odd. like a lot of people are saying truly dumb shit about it, but the way he apparently came out as bi a few years back after he had a kid, his wife left him, and he's now on HRT? i feel like there's more to that whole situation like if you wanted to dress more femme you didn't need to jump through these hoops so what is actually up my dude...
#like people always have reasons should we place our bets#kinda not surprised by the overwhelming hate being flung his way tho a lot of mr beast viewers are conservative dude bros#which is actually surprising considering who jimmy seems to be as a person and what his channel raises funds for?#but yeah i'm curious if he'll make a statement cause i wanna psychoanalyze his ass lmao
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I will be honest guys, the Red portrait of king Charles is gorgeous asdfghjkl
it's a bad portrait. Like. Objectively. It does the opposite of what's intended. It looks like the painter is insulting him. If it was in a contemporary gallery with no context you would see it immediately as the ambivalent criticism of Charles's reign, how he fades into the overwhelming red background as a tiny little figure, small and insignificant, insufficient for the clothes he's wearing. It reminds my of Goya's portraits, how they were so 'realistic' that they ended up making these great figures look pathetic to the viewer. So these are our rulers?
the sheer novelty. the surprise and shock, the kinda cunt it's serving for no reason. I. I love it. It's an incredible portrait by Jonathan Yeo. By the sheer fact that Charles, the man, is impossible to portray as greater than man because he's just such a nothingburger of a dude. So a portrait made to make him look huge and interesting made him be swallowed in red brushstrokes. The butterfly, that reminded me immediately of " we will all laugh at guilded butterflies", draws more attention than him. It looks like an omen. It looks like a warning in all this red. Something is not right here.
This is the best royal portrait ever 10/10
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Networking/Knowing A Guy: A Guide
This is the autism website. Now, as an extension of the power of love and friendship, there are few things more useful than Knowing A Guy. Knowing A Guy means you have a support network. Knowing a plumber, or a tax accountant, or just that one dude that's really fucking good at finding the information you need when you're really overwhelmed, can be the difference between being able to pay rent and having a fun party with friends to fix your shit.
How does one end up Knowing A Guy? It's a skill you can develop called Networking and it is one of the foundations of society. Unfortunately making those connections with people is fucking hard and nobody makes a tutorial for it. So, here you go:
The golden rule is you scratch my back and I scratch yours
It is necessary for survival to seek out useful people
Great news! Everyone is useful in some form or fashion - including you! When given the opportunity to learn about someone, do it! Extroversion does not come naturally to some people and that's okay. Just take whatever falls in your lap.
Types of usefulness: trade skills, connections of their own, personality you jive with, pleasant to talk to, niche interest in shared hobby, security - the list is pretty much endless. I know a guy that lives in the metro area - no job, no major hobbies, inoffensively annoying to me personally, kinda ignorant, not attractive to me, but you know what? He knows how the fuck to get around the city by foot. My rural-raised ass APPRECIATES the guide.
Remember important information: general personality, background, skillset, likes and dislikes. You can find this information by making smalltalk about their life. There is no such thing as pointless conversation. (Yes, even the annoying smalltalk)
The more people you know, the higher the likelihood that one of them will be useful in a given situation - or will know someone who is.
It is overwhelming. In a given clique/community/workspace/whatever, there is A Guy Who Knows The Other Guys. This Guy is a shortcut. Find them. They're often elderly, extroverted, a little bit annoying, a secretary or in some otherwise forward-facing position. Look for people that are gossipy/talk about other people a lot but not in negative ways. If they constantly talk shit, they'll talk shit about you too. They're still useful but be careful with the information you share
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.*
If you have low self esteem, you're going to feel like you're using people. You're not. That's the devil talking. People like feeling valued and the connections you are making are the threads holding community together. Recognize people for their talents. It's only a problem when you're taking advantage of people
So: don't feel scummy about it. You're an animal. You have to claw out your right to survive and people will respect you more for it.
Luckily mutualism is the name of the game in the animal kingdom. Offer something back. The foundation of a Know A Guy relationship is Mutual Benefit
Sometimes that Mutual Benefit is just spreading news of the The Guy far and wide. My plumber friend is my actual friend and I love her to death, but I'm maintaining our backscratch relationship by pimping out her plumbing business to anyone that'll listen
Food is a good Mutual Benefit. People across cultures for all of human history have bonded over food. I have good success asking people for a favor and then offering to buy them lunch in return **
General compensation is also good. Offer a service in return and always do your best to offer financial compensation as appropriate. Having your plumber friend take a look at your drain: doable with a case of beer. Having your plumber friend redo the pipes in your entire house? You need to pay for that.
Being transactional is not necessarily a bad thing. I would advise against keeping an itemized list of things owed, but fish don't seek out cleaner shrimp just because they enjoy their company. Everyone gets something
Unfortunately being extroverted and generally personable is a huge benefit here, but that's the value of the Guy That Knows A Guy. There's someone out there that has consolidated All The Guys so you don't have to be the local expert. Always remember nobody can do everything and you don't need to master every skill
* This is the foundation of a functioning community. I have many acquaintances that I find incredibly annoying. They include doctors, welders, artists, social workers, lawyers, construction crew and random fuckers at the grocery store. I do not hang out with them. I do not have to in order to maintain a civil Know A Guy relationship. I can drop them useful tidbits and fuck right off so I don't have to spend any more time than necessary with them
** People may assume romantic intent. Be prepared for that. I generally denote that it's a friendly/work lunch by calling them bro at some point if they're my age. Otherwise my general demeanor is sufficient to show that I do this with everyone
Source: personal experience, mother's teachings of crime, booth vending and poverty
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i kind of don't feel like people who are snobby about (batman) comics have any right to be snobby about them. lol
#i keep running into like. 'ugh these tumblr fans who are just into fanon and don't read comics'#i get how that's annoying but also. who give a shit#and maybe i just haven't familiarized myself enough but it seems like comics vary so widely in quality and characterization#that being condescending about them is kinda dumb#then again i'd probably feel the same way if i were on the other side#but my opinion ultimately is: who give a shit#people will stay as surface level as they want. i kinda can't blame them especially when in this case. comics are soooo overwhelming dude
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we stopped at a hotel for day 1 of the trip and good lord the travel was abysmal. i am so overwhelmed. i cannot wait to get to my aunts and have a room to myself because holy fucking shit. I NEED SPACE TO MYSEEELLF I NEED IT.
#our windshield got cracked by some dude not securing gravel on his truck.#then something else flew at the car. scared everyone. scared me.#<- guy with a car phobia.#and my roommate is just. honestly kinda a bad driver. as well as just a fucking negative ball.#so i just feel fucking fatigued. and my roommate is telling me 'stop being so overwhelmed you werent even driving'#ALMOST went off. almost.#god today sucked.#ly talks
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Btw beware about intercepting cop shit sometimes the issues last 😑
#i mean is it disability or just having to deal with casual visits over every damn thing because of certain records#like i mean the attention is overwhelming (the weird thing about cops is that sometimes they are straight up almost flirty)#these cases are the worst tho because it's kind of up against the wall but nothing happens but you know if anything happened either you are#casual about it either well i won't elaborate#or at least this is the impression it gives but I think they just play games because at some point i kinda played along#and he got uncomfortable like so uncomfortable i mean the dude went silent and sat in my stair for over 45 minutes#i did nothing just gave an ok vibe#was enough 😐#maybe he was like really unsure either way he wanted but like we have a bidet bitch#all that when his colleague yelled at my bitch and asked them for a coffee next#some destiny's child was even playing in the bg#we had so much fun 🥺#everyone wanted to bottom especially the yelling one probably like i mean bitch probably on the way to arrest crimes#and we dunno how we got here i mean it was my dad who made the call over a clown thing but a mega one#that's why i kinda hate him#twice#but like he just...i don't know why he prank cops over my case but sometimes parents are insane#i had to go to fed court because he thought he was funny...#like...dude#i wasn't guilty of course but he had to say funny quotes to the cops#and he straight up no helped because he was like “oh shit fuck ohshit oh no but not guilty and work every receipts but oh shit fuck sorry”#when i received the real receipts he almost landed us in a wall ajdjsjsjfjfjd#i mean with car and everything#but in face of things#we figured#this is stupid and keep the circus up#and i won while he went...i mean imagine#i cope as much as i can#bitch just roam around in jacksonville to prance i mean what are you doing here?#i mean i get the very will to die but can you cope better you don't go through the deal bitch eh oh
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I stand by the belief that Drift/Deadlock and Hot Rod would be friends in any universe. Much to the terror of everyone else.
———————————————————————
Deadlock was loosing his mind.
Deadlocks face plates were starting to hurt from the strain of manually stopping himself from reflexively smiling. And why did he have an overwhelming compulsion to smile?
Because: This. Tiny. Minuscule. Absolute Fragging SPECK of a human was somehow radiating more emotion out of his EM field than any other mech that Deadlock has ever met in his life.
And what was that emotion?
"THIS IS THE COOLEST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN IN MY FUCKING LIFE!"
Joy. Pure. Unfiltered. Unrestrained. And completely unreasonable levels of joy.
"RATCHET. RATCHET. HE'S SO COOL."
The mini nuclear reactor was currently shaking the medic by the shoulders, practically vibrating with unspent energy. Seconds ago, Hot Rod had seemingly slagging materialized next to him in an explosion of emotion that damn near knocked Deadlock on his aft. He was currently tempted to swat the little fragger halfway across the hangar to escape the onslaught of unexpected emotions except-
Ratchet had personally brought him in. Even now, the medics field remained calm and collected in the face of what to Deadlock felt like a fragging Sun. He kinda envied humans field numbness right now because it was definitely starting to screw with his processor.
Case in point, Deadlock had to take a click to refocus on what the squishes were talking about.
"No fucking way. Really?!"
“Yes, he really did take down those three quints near the wind farm by himself. Ate one of 'em too.”
"YOU EAT THEM?!?"
Deadlock was expecting disgust, but instead all he could feel was overwhelming awe. His resolve to remain aloof and detached was quickly beginning to crumble before the blast furnace of Hot Rods personality.
A manual override finally failed and Deadlock broke into a wide grin. At least he kept his fangs on prominent display. Equal parts smile and threat.
"Drink, actually."
Deadlock made a conscious effort to take on a more relaxed posture, one that would convey predatory pride and confidence.
"Dude. Dude. Dude."
Hot Rod held his hands to his face, leg rapidly bouncing up and down.
"YOU'RE A FREAKING ROBOT VAMPIRE FROM OUTER SPACE?!"
Before Deadlock could ask what a vampire was, Hot Rod had begun jogging away while screaming incoherently.
"What. What is happening?" Deadlock leaned towards his human, listening to Hot Rod get fainter as he rounded the corner of the hangar.
"About what I expected.” Ratchet grumbled, setting his hands on his hips.
“Roddy is intense as they come but he’s a damn good pilot and an even better friend."
Ratchet pointed a finger at Deadlock.
"Don't tell him I said that."
Hot Rod had become almost inaudible by now but was slowly gaining volume again.
"Right now kid, it's just been you and I. And trust me I enjoy the arrangement. But we can't fight every battle by ourselves. Sometimes you just need help. Sometimes,"
The screaming was quickly gaining decibels.
“You just need a friend.”
A friend.
Huh.
The scarred, defensive, self preserving part of Deadlock protested the thought of being pried open any further. Ratchet had started the process. But, c'mon. It's Ratchet. He scolded his inner self. Ratchet always left things stronger then before. So, maybe. Just a little bit. Deadlock could at least see what was so great about this squishy human.
The screaming returned to its initial volume as Hot Rod rounded the corner and mech. They were pretty sure humans normally breathed more often than that?
Hot Rod came to a stop before the two of them.
Finally gasping in fresh air. His field was absolutely roiling, pretty much all positive emotions but the screaming lap around the building had clearly vented a lot of energy.
"Can you turn into a bat?!"
Deadlock reset his optics, an idea spreading across his processor as he finally let his Em field reciprocate with giddiness and mischief.
Who cares if it's sparkling behavior? It’s fun. He told the Deadlock part of himself.
"Nope. But do you want to know what I can turn into?"
Hot Rod nodded so fast Ratchet looked concerned.
Che-che-chu-klunk.
Hot Rod started screaming again.
This time when when his EM field hit Deadlock he took it all in and reflected it right back. He revved his engine so loudly it shook the windows. Hot Rod was running and jumping in a tight circle around the two of them, radiating Joy Joy Joy Joy. Deadlock swore his field was even effecting Ratchet at this point from the way happy seemed to bounce between the three of them in various shades.
"Can we go for a ride?!"
Hot Rod had stopped by Deadlocks passenger side door. Rapidly looking between Ratchet and Deadlock, clearly uncertain who's permission to ask for.
"Well Doc, do you trust us not to get into trouble?" He wriggled his tires.
"You two? Staying out of trouble? Hell no."
Ratchet rubbed his chin the way he always did when he was trying to stop himself from smiling.
"But as long as you both come back in one piece and before dark... Well I don't see the harm."
Hot Rod gave his loudest "WOOP!" Yet. A feat in it of itself. A scrambled into Deadlocks cabin, forgoing the door entirely to throw himself bodily through the window.
They tore away from Ratchets hangar with a chorus of thanks and a spray of gravel.
———————
It was well after dark by the time the duo rolled into Ratchets hangar. Hot Rod stumbled out into a semi controlled summersault that left him spread eagle on the floor, laughing and panting. While Deadlock smoothly transformed and promptly rolled flat on his back in a similar state of delirium.
They had so much fun. He had so much fun.
When was the last time he'd ever felt like that?
When had he ever felt like that?
Ratchet was upside down frowning at him. No, wait. Smiling.
Happy. Fondness. Proud.
Love.
Deadlock cleared his vents and put a hand over his spark before his chest plates could do something very stupid.
Ratchet turned to the hot mess on the floor.
"I got the couch set up for you. Figured you're gonna stay the night."
Hot Rod stuck his arms straight up, palms open.
"Woo, sleepover!"
His field had finally simmered down to something like coals. A bone deep exhaustion that made Deadlock feel heavy by proxy.
They both gracelessly shuffled onto their respective resting arrangements, Ratchet taking the recliner after dimming all the lights.
Soon enough, all three were in recharge or asleep.
———————
Deadlock started out of recharge with tightly trained silence.
Something was wrong.
Threatened. Stressed. Afraid.
Deadlock seemed dead to the world still. But internally, his systems quickly synced to kill. A skill he had honed over many millennia of unsafe homes and attempted assassinations.
What surprised him was how he already mentally mapped out how to maneuver the humans into the safest location in a fight. Deadlock finally onlined his optics, casting the hangar in an amber glow. His processor clicked and Deadlock realized what was triggering his fight response.
Threatened. Stressed. Afraid.
Hot Rod.
Limbs twisted in fabric, face buried in the crook of the couch. Posture contorted. Breathing uneven. Field pulled in so tight it felt suffocating.
Deadlock loosely knew what a nightmare was.
Ratchet got them sometimes, though he wouldn't admit it until Deadlock made it clear the lack of context was freaking him out a little.
The way Ratchet explained it was that it was essentially a way for the brain to process excess information. Basically the same as defrag but with some weird human side effects because of course there were weird human side effects.
Like whatever was currently happening to Hot Rod.
From previous experience, nudging Ratchet awake usually resulted in a snort or other cut of vocalization. But if there was anything Deadlock had learned it was that Hot Rod did not do anything quietly.
Ratchet was still sleeping on his recliner, but there was a subtle shifting and a pinch to his face. Not a nightmare, Deadlock had learned the pattern, but something was bothering the medic and it threatened to wake him from his much needed rest.
Help.
The wave of desperate emotion spilled out like an overfilled cup.
Right, Hod Rods EM field was freakishly strong. It was restrained for now but Deadlock dreaded what it’d feel like if the dam broke.
He watched Ratchet stir again and. . . Wait.
Could humans pick up on EM fields?
Can’t a deaf mech still feel the vibrations of a song? Couldn’t a blind one still feel the warmth of the sun?
What if?
Deadlock moved as silently as death. Cupping a servo over the pilot. He stopped restricting his field and focused.
Calm.
Hot Rod made another almost vocalization. Like he was trying to yell without enough air.
Calm. Deadlock tried again. Comforting anyone was so, so far from his normal area of expertise. Did he even know what calm was supposed to feel like? What safe was supposed to be? He wracked his memories as Deadlock and abandoned that immediately.
Calm. Safe. Ratchet.
Okay. Deadlock didn’t know how to comfort someone, but Ratchet did. He focused his field again, this time on trying to mimic what he always felt from Ratchet as closely as possible.
Care. Fondness.
Deadlock vented slowly. It felt hollow coming from him. The new field was there but it was weak. Unsupported. Deadlock worried his lip with a fang. Hot Rod simmered.
He vented slowly. Deadlock opened the box at the back of his mind named Drift. He knew what he needed. Everything else could stay but he needed this one feeling. Just one.
The stars were out over Dead End. A brown out had swept the area, leaving everything in the dark. Drift didn’t know the sky could look like that.
The others were gathered around in silent awe. Nobody dared to break the spell. Tomorrow, everything would suck again. Scraping money for the next meal, the next hit, the next chance to live just a little longer.
But for a few fleeting moments, Drift was okay. They were all okay. Because the circles of light around Cybertron said so.
Peace.
Drift let the feeling fill his field. Calm and fondness meant something again.
He thought of his time with Ratchet and Hot Rod. Finding something new in himself.
Protect.
It was like smoke clearing all at once. Hot Rod exhaled deeply in his sleep, field going soft and gentle.
He kept it up, at some point his engine had started purring without him knowing. A pleasant white noise within the hangar. They were okay. Everyone he cared about was okay. He felt peace. Just for now. Just for them.
“Didn’t know you could do that.”
Ratchets voice was thick with sleep. One eye barely cracked to look at him.
“Me too.”
—————————
Part 1
This is long and it’s getting late. Deadlock has an emotional breakthrough and Hot Rod dreams about I dunno, pancakes or something.
-SSTP
Infinitely entertained by the mental image of Ratchet trying to pick someone who he can trust but who will also get along with Kid. And then looking at Hot Rod and being like Yep. That one.
ALSO. Hot Rod having an EM field equivalent of a nuclear fucking reactor is just so👌👌👌 YES HE WOULD. ABSOLUTELY YES HAHAHKFNGM
I never get tired of reading about Roddy and Lock losing their last brain cells when they are together. Anon. Anon look at me. I LOVE YOU ANON. I WILL CHERISH THIS PIECE FOREVER IT BROUGHT ME THE UNMEASURABLE AMOUNT OF JOY THANK YOU FOR SHARING IT
#maccadam#transformers#tf mecha universe#ratchlock#Hot rod#roddy#mecha writing#mecha rl writing#mecha dr art#mecha dr writing
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A thought to add to that fantasy:
The owners end up having to go on a trip again a month or two later, and seeing as you did such a good job last time, they ask if you can watch him again for two weeks. Even though you really don't want to, they pay really well and you could really use the money, so you end up in their living room as they hand you the keys and head off on their trip, his snout pushing between your thighs before their even out of the driveway...
mmmm yesss i mean unfortunately i need the money and they pay so much bc he’s a big dog and eats a lottt so i have to keep dog sitting him.
as we’re in the driveway, i push his snout away from me and walk inside. i pour food in his bowl and get myself a snack. i remember not to bend over or lean down too much bc of what happened last time. and i wore that stupid skirt again. why?? because i have to be presentable for the owners, they know my parents and will report back or get someone else if i seem like i’m a slacker. anyway, i literally can’t ignore the fact that his huge dick is just out bruh like have some courtesy.
i’m there for a couple hours watching movies and chilling on the couch while he’s on the floor. I fall asleep to the peaceful sound of gunshots from an action movie.
OW WHAT THE FUCK. i wake up in a panicked state feeling claws scraping my thighs. i look down and this damn fuckin dog has his head under my skirt and is nuzzling my pussy rn, licking it way too harshly. wondered why i had such an intense wet dream. ewww disgusting i push his head away but he’s not budging, he muzzles deeper and is tongue goes inside me. it goes in wayyy too easily bc im fucking soaked. WTF buddy get out please..i feel his huge tongue lapping at my walls and my legs start shaking. fuck i’m like about to cum in a dogs mouth this is so sick. my thighs start tightening around his head, then he stops.
dude. what. there’s no way this dog just edged me. fuck off.
he gets up to leave but then bites onto my skirt and drags it up all the way to my face. i playfully bite onto it, taking it from him and giggle. but all of a sudden his paws pin down both of my arms and i realize what position we’re in. oh my god no no no no no NO.
his hips go down and he starts bucking them trying to find my parts. so gross please don’t, not again. i squirm trying to dodge his scary MASSIVE doggy cock. he then lays his upper body down on me, putting all his weight on and pushes harshly into me. FUCK. god what the fuck. he ruts into me in and out so fast and hard, it hurts. i think his cock is getting bigger…oh shit. noooooo no no. please don’t. i try to push his paws off my arms and he snaps at my face, i flinch away and tears start running. he licks them off my face while still pounding me. the squelching sound and my whimpers fill the room it sounds so fucking inappropriate. i feel his knot trying to get in “NO BUD GET OFF!” he pops it in and finally stops thrusting. the feeling is overwhelming and i cum immediately as it goes in. buddy whines and barks in my face. i feel his liquid flood me. fucking disgusting. im still sniffling from earlier but i take deep breathes while his knot goes down. he continues to lick my face till im ok. that’s kinda nice. but not nice bc he knotted me without permission. “no treats later buddy” i say and then he starts shifting his hips, i gasp as he slips it out of me. i hear the liquid drip onto the floor and feel it gush out of me. sweaty and panting, im still laid out on the couch, legs spread, and there’s a disgusting doggy cum mess all over my pussy.
fuck…i look down and see it left his huge puddle on the couch. great, now i have to clean it all up. i get up carefully and start walking when my legs give out. i collapse on the floor, my legs are too shaky to walk. buddy walks over to me and is sniffing me, especially down there. he whines. i think he feels bad and wants to clean me up. i slowly and carefully spread my legs and he puts his head down, licking up my thighs and on my pussy. fuck it’s sore and feels really overstimulated, but um, kinda good ig. his head comes up and he licks my face, spreading his cum on me GROSS. i push him away and he trots away, growing another hard on. i roll my eyes, glad that didn’t go anywhere. i get up, less shaky now, and go to get the cleaning stuff.
i clean up the mess and forgot about his cum, now crusted, on my cheek. gross. i wash it off and sit back on the couch, exhausted even more now. i refuse to sleep near him again. what a gross horny dog. what is his deal seriously. he lays on the ground near me and stares at me, panting, his red cock out on the ground as well. god, can’t believe i have three more days of bullshit.
IM SO WET WRITING THIS
#puppy space#puppypl4y#dumb puppy#petpl4y#puppy gf#puppy sub#puppyposting#1cky puppy#bd/sm puppy#bd/sm pet#petpl@y#breeding pet#mutt posting#mutt barks#dumb mutt#doggyfuck#d0ggystyl3#d0ggy kn0t#breeding k1nk#r@pe kink#r4p3 kink#kn0t#k9 kink#k9 cock#k9 girl#public kink#cnc k!nk#bd/sm kink#kn0tting#kn0ttybaby
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edging. thats what was being done to you apparently. not that you could remember the word for it by that point, you were in too deep. infact, you think, as you lay there on your back with your thighs splayed open — you may have forgotten every word in the english dictionary.
you’d spent the weekend doting after john b and jj, having them stay in your free house — cooking for them, running around after them, doing anything they wanted to do — and now, they were repaying with a token of their appreciation.
“so here’s the thing, i’m like — 99% sure i can make you squirt. tonight. but here’s the catch, i kinda have to treat you a little mean first. keep working you over and over, and just when you’re gonna cum? i take it away.” john b explains as he helps you out of your clothes, the brunettes voice huskier than usual from arousal.
“s’called edging, dude.” jj stands in his boxers, a halfie poking up against the fabric already as he hurriedly moves your discarded clothes off the bed.
“i was getting there, actually? if you’d just, y’know— let me finish?” the two bicker like they always do, john b shrugging a dismissive shoulder at the blonde who ignores him to tackle you down and start mouthing hungrily at your neck. again, you didn’t really remember or care what the conversation was — the details a little fuzzy due to how much you needed them.
that’s how you ended up laying spread eagle, john b laying a warm hand on your inner thigh, soothing you by stroking your skin with his thumb as you cry out at another stolen orgasm. he pulls his lips off your swollen clit, brows raising and lips quirking up at a soft but amused smile. “ah, ah — i know pup. look, s’gonna feel so good soon okay? just let me be mean a little longer.” he disappears once more, you see him do so through your tears and his fingers start squelching on that squishy spot that made you shake.
jj reclines against the headboard, lazily fisting at his cock as he watches — prepping to eventually fuck the daylights out of you.
“yeah yeah, our girl likes it mean. don’t let those puppy eyes fool ‘ya.” jj drawls casually, tongue tucking between his lips in concentrated pleasure as you arch your back, humping against john b’s face.
“oh—oh m—oh it’s coming, s’coming!” you pant, voice high and desperate making the two chuckle. “please lemme have it, please lemme have it!” you beg, voice cracking and through the haze you feel your brunette boyfriend smirk against your parted folds.
“seeing as you begged so nicely. have at it, sweetheart.” he croons before doubling down on your clit, rolling his tongue over and over all whilst pressing up that spot inside you that made you explode. you mewl, crying and bucking against john b’s face until he eventually holds you down — and then you feel yourself really let go, liquid spewing out of you, a feeling you’ve never felt before.
you go to sit up in a trance, a little distressed and panicked at how overwhelming it felt and jj grabs your hand, rolling his thumb over your knuckles.
“nah you’re good pooch. just a lil squirt. never hurt nobody.” he chuckles and you flop back, rolling your hips up against john b’s face lazily but fluidly. “damn.” jj shakes his head, going to squeeze at his cock once more.
what happens next, you could swear you imagined. something out of a pornographic daydream you’d had. john b pulls back, sitting up from between your thighs and you swear he’s an angel. hair all tousled, skin glowing in the low light of the room on your pink bed sheets, your slick glossing his entire lower face. he holds the eye contact with you only for a little, that affectionate little smile of his not dying even when he breaks his gaze to look toward jj.
it’s then you realise that he’s not spoken, and it’s because he’s got your squirt in his mouth.
you’re panting still, coming down — and your brain is all over the place, unable to form a sentence even if you wanted to. you feel disconnected from your body, with no choice other than to simply watch from your post-orgasm paralysis as john b leans over with a playful smirk, grabs jj by the jaw, opens his mouth forcefully and spits your completion inside.
drawing back, a string of spit connects them both for a second— and whilst jj looks stunned, you noticed his fist tighten around his cock as he swallows it down, silenced for once in his god damn life. john b smirks, patting his cheek.
“uh-huh, get that down ‘ya, slick.”
“closest you’ll ever get to kissing me.” jj retorts, recovering his astonishment with red wet lips and wide eyes.
“i can live with that.” john b shrugs nonchalantly, coming back to lean over you like he didn’t just edge you for an hour. grabbing your hips, he effortlessly moves your body to be splayed infront of jj like a gift, and brushes a thumb against your cheek. “anyway, took that like a champ sweetie. you need a break? or are you gonna let jj in there?” he cups your cunt casually and you shudder.
usually you’d require a break, but after what you just witnessed — you needed it now.
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Oh baby tomorrow. Today technically. It's already here huh. Just sort of happening. Just like that. Cool beans (<- abt 2 cry)
#rat rambles#band posting#/pos btw but also god damn#Im just. fuck man bndori means so so much to me and all of this has been so overwhelming in a good way but still#Ive been wanting to talk more abt everything thats been going on but I just genuinely cannot word my feelings on everything its so much#like dont yall think for even a second that I havent been internally freakingthe fuck out over lisa giving moca her tie (and yukina to ran)#and hinas speech and lisa and kaoru and maya and eve and ako and ran and just fucking everyone everyone is making me wanna fucking cry#bndori is just. so important to me for many reasons but largely just because it marks such a shift in my life for the better#I wont like credit it for everything ofc but like dude it supported me through some rly rough patches and helped me pull myself forward#like idk this sounds kind of silly but. I think its one of the first medias Ive been into thats actually made me feel good#like not just passionate and hyperfixated on but like actual joy#like from the media itself. god just moca laughing makes me so happy#and again this also might sound kinda silly but I think that joy did a lot to help me like. want to feel better?#like want to change things and move forward even if slowly#and I still have a long way to go but Ive genuinely made so much progress and again I wont directly credit bandori but it certainly helped#also it helped me properly realise Im a lesbian lol#blows a kiss to kaoru. thanks for making me a rimi kinnie ig#also thanks to dawn for being the reason I got into it genuinely changed my life for the better thanks man#but like seriously I think you also generally did a good amount to help me get better at social stuff online#even if we havent talked in a while 😔#but like seriously I dont know what I would have done if you hadnt reached out to me time and time again to chat#Id probably have just melted in my own isolation lol#welp that got a bit personal fast I should probably go 2 bed now djdkhskdh#gn gamers and uhhh sorry if you followed me during my peak paranoia era I was going thru it lol
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