#<= (a tag for me speaking)
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1959 chevy impala that i made in spore, inspired by @making-you-in-spore
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "đđŒđđŒâ" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) âwhy didn't he use đ«”đŒ?â didn't exist yet. âwhy didn't he use đ?â dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. đđŒ is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent đđŒđđŒ as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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When I was a kid, we moved into a house that had a huge lilac tree out front. It was mostly rotten, and it needed to be taken down before it fell. It took a while, but eventually, it was gone.
Mostly. A couple years later, little lilac babies popped out of the ground in its place. My mom was determined to get rid of them, because she'd planted a beautiful flower garden there, and the lilac trees would overshadow and kill the whole garden. I insisted on saving at least a few saplings. She said fine, but I had to dig them out and put them in pots myself.
So, I did. I spent days digging little lilac bushes out of the ground and putting them into pots. Some couldn't be saved, but some could. When all was said and done, I had five brand-new lilac saplings. Seven or eight years old, and it was my absolute pride and joy.
Three died due to sun scorching, severe drought that no amount of watering could save, and perhaps just being moved from their place in the ground. But two survived, and I was awfully proud of them! I'd go out and talk to them every single day. I watered them by hand and made sure they were fertilized properly. I learned all about their favored environments, and I was determined to make sure they lived.
One of my mom's friends saw what I was doing with the lilacs. She asked if she could have one to put in her backyard, and I agreed on the condition that she take very, very good care of it.
It's now fucking enormous. I'm talking ten feet tall and bursting with beautiful purple flowers every spring. My mom still gets updates each year as they start to bloom, which she forwards to me. And all I can think is, "That's my friend! Thriving some twenty years on, there it is."
The other tree nearly died, too. It lived in a pot for far, far too long. I wanted to plant it somewhere in my parents' yard, but my mom was reluctant. Eventually, we agreed to put it in the far back garden. It grew okay for many years, despite the shade, but in all these years, it's never bloomed.
Last year, the massive tree casting massive shadows over the lilac and the garden cracked in half and fell. It tumbled into the garden, crushing part of the nearby shed and destroying a few plants beneath it.
It missed my lilac by inches.
The clean-up is long done. The rest of the tree has been cut down, and my lilac has full sunlight for the first time in fifteen years. It won't bloom this year, I know. But it's got new shoots up. It's taller than ever. I spent half an hour a few weeks ago praising it for surviving all this time, dreaming about its future and telling it how I believe it'll become the tall beauty it's always been meant to be.
I think next year, I'll see flowers.
#aese speaks#a little personal story for you all#the origin of my life-long relationship with lilacs#i've been a garden witch since i was very small! (:#green witch#garden witch#garden magic#the lilac post#hello to everyone reading the og tags on this:#it's a metaphor it's a true story it's real it's fiction it's a poem it's me rambling it's whatever you think it is#30k
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Iâm bored and nosy. Please reblog this with the book youâre currently reading.
#for me Iâm rereading Frankenstein#itâs such a good book man#I mean everyone knows that itâs literally one of the most influential books ever but#itâs so good#tag game#mera speaks#10k
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dont got much to offer for The Holiday but have these sillies!
happy valentines day :D
#sxf#spy x family#damianya#damian desmond#anya forger#my art#i am sleepy rn im scheduling this ahead of time like several hours ahead JKSDFKLS#unrelated to sxf. the tags are my speaking place shush#was not expecting the toby fox newsletter to have so much for me to think about JKKLDFSS#good ole gaster sending us love letters (we don't KNOW it's gaster but like. typing pattern + him being the only character to be like)#(directly referring to the game as deltarune)#ALSO THE WEATHERMEN HAVE NAMES NOW ?!?!? AND ARE IN LOVE ???!?!#so happy for them fr#i didnt get the mettaton card but like just know. that is my essence. all those blingee-core sparkles. those picmix hearts. me#anyway YIPPEE WAHOO
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I want to post this here too because Iâve seen it happen a few times
Please understand that there are cultural differences and language differences, if you see this happening let the person clarify what they meant, that person might just not be familiar with words the western side of the internet use
#bearz rambling tag#no itâs not really possible to let everyone who uses this term to change#because as far as I know this is the most common word with use on Chinese websites#I didnât know that pairing are called âshipâ here#like why would I even know that#âshipâ makes zero sense to me#it took me a while to learn the fandom language people speak here#itâs hard#give people time#shipping culture is very different too#Like on Chinese site you HAVE to clarify the Top and the Bottom of this ship in the ship name#it is very very important to them#people who like the same ship but with different Top Bottom preference will fight till no end#imagine how confused I was when I first got here#where thereâs no top bottom differences#itâs not really a smut thing#itâs more a dynamic thing#AxB and BxA is very different#oh I can talk so much about the differences on fandom cultures#if ya are interested in more please feel free to ask#itâs very interesting to me#I wanna talk about it
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"You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think you ought to have yourself." Margaret Atwood, The Handmaidâs Tale
#art donaldson becoming the most interesting character to me#i'm just obsessed with his jealousy and desires#he's so opaque bc he rarely speaks up but he's an open book when you know how to read him#that much jealousy should have consumed him entirely from the inside we're lucky he's still standing#âwas anyone going to tell me about this parallel or was i supposed to notice it by myself?â#i say as never check the tag bc i'm easily annoyed#this seems like an obvious parallel considering the next scene that happens with tashi but i never realized it before now oops#nasty snake donaldson they will never take you away from me!!#art donaldson#tashi duncan#patrick zweig#challengers
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@eydilily 's gempearl designs r so gorgeous i had to draw........ also a swap?? ft. some nzsl bc i was briefly possessed by the spirit of. hands.
#gempearl#shiny duo#ooooohhhh idk how to tag. what's the etiquette?? kinda don't wanna do the main tag for ship stuff?? aughhhh#disclaimer the sl might be a bit iffy. i haven't learnt any since high school but the online dictionary is pretty good so i'm HOPING :)#ik the sign for ''if'' is slightly off; the thumb should touch the chin. anyway :)#the idea of creaking gem who can't speak PLUS warden pearl who's sensitive to noise.... SIGN LANGUAGE IT'S PERFECTTTT. tho i mayyy have ove#looked how pearl is reading the sign (is she blind??) WHOOPS. it's probably fine đŹ#my art#also hello eydilily if you see this i hope it's okay for me to draw these designs!! they are just SO GOOD i was SPELLBOUND when i saw themm#the texture and colours of the original..... OUGH. STUNNING.#mcyt
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Happy 1 year anniversary to Mr Sherlock Holmes! Here's a litttleee celebratory comic from me
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#writing these tags on the 29th of september#which is when john and sherlock ACTUALLY met <3#so there you go#uh once again shout out to candy for letting me talk through some of my processes#it helps immensely and i really wanted to be sure i was getting across what i wanted to with this one#speaking of which - usually i yap a lot in the tags of these bcus i love talking about art#for this one...im not sure i want to comment too much#because i'll be here forever and i think most things can speak for themself#but let me say this one thing#for the first five pages i was drawing john on paper and sherlock on the computer exclusively#and then bringing them together..#uh it really made me think of paul and harry. recording on opposite sides of the world. brought together by the power of editing#its not a particularly emotional scene but i hope ive infused it with. something.#anyway thats it from me#if u want to ask about any particular aspect i would love to yap about the process but i'll just leave it here for now or i'll never shut u#happy 1 year podpals#patsart#oh yeah i will say i did have to take quite a bit of liberty with the audio in order to do what i wanted. forgive me#or dont idc
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amok time bottomifing kirk was genius actually because i do believe that this man, who is in a position of leadership and who is constantly reminded of the weight every choice he makes and every word he says has, needs to be manhandled from time to time. for the good of the soul
i think itâs brilliant how spock is incredibly stronger than kirk (and not only that, as he is physically larger as well). how the first officer makes his captain look so weak, so frail, outisde the bridge, outside the ship, ripped from any resemblance of being in control. also itâs so fucking hot
what the fuck
#follow me star trek freaks!#cali speaks#directly from my twitter#<- is this gonna become a recurring tag? maybe!#star trek#star trek tos#spirk#k/s#amok time#suggestive ?#james t kirk#jim kirk#s'chn t'gai spock#mr spock
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[right to left]
finally finished This Wip from Ever ago and so now i ask you ever look into another dudes eyes and suddenly want to do whatever he wants
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#professor x#magneto#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#the kids are here too but i aint taggin them vaeLKEVJKLJ#snap sketches#posting this now and not obsessing over the details i need to SLEEP#please click/tap and zoom to read anything im sorry theres so much dialogue#i thought i was gonna finish this sooner but i went grocery shopping with my bro today and that took longer than expected !!!!#ALSO CHAT. if youre up to date on My Lore via my tags ... my prof's lettin me submit my assignment ... life's so good...#speaking of life being good i was giggling like stupid while drawing this . i named it 'this is stupid' and i stand by that#this is so unserious im gonna make myself throw up ITS SO CORNY i make myself sick with what i draw <- will continue to do this#only god knows if this is even how that power of his works i just saw an opportunity and ran with it#the trick here is he doesnt even have to use any 'power' he can just do that to charles by default#however im making them be obnoxious about it. i am making them obnoxious over dramatic grandpas because i can#my only crime is loving the utter cheese and corniness of the 60s comics like God. anyways bye !!!!!!!#maybe one day ill finish that other comic i sketched for this weekend but i fear i wont have time to so next weekend me thinks ....#for now i hope you all enjoy this. goofy as hell nonsense jLAKJVEKLVJ
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i know it will never happen but i so desperately desire an origins-type playable backstory thing in all games but especially veilguard. i feel like it added so much depth to origins and made you feel instantly connected to your character in a way that gets lost in games like inquisition where you fill in the blanks as you go except for the bare basics. like, i do enjoy the freedom to willy nilly decide where a character was before the events of the story from a creative perspective, but the playable origins were just so good! especially when you go back to where your warden is from and can engage differently with the arcs there
#i'm so sorry to anyone who hates da that follows me lmao i will keep stuff tagged#i'm probably going to be so annoying about this new game even if i hate it aofijeoijw which is probably likely#maybe i'll actually get around to replaying the other games now. we'll see#i had started origins but just wasn't feeling it bc tbqh it's just a bit clunky and none of the romance options really speak to me anymore#morrigan is great but i feel like she doesn't fit the character i wanted to play afoweijaoi and leliana scares me in dao lmao#i get such ick from overly religious characters faowiejfao#like i like her and cass in theory but in reality i want to run away screaming#it's different if the fake religion isn't overwhelmingly christianity-based but the da one is#and it makes me feel like there are bees under my flesh#dragon age#*dykeposting
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i may be a toxic gatekeeper but unless they were there all these sad quote/imagine accounts will NEVER understand the intricacies of âwhat am i without you?â / âyourself?â because they NEVER put a question mark on tubboâs response. yeah the quote hits hard on its own whatever but the context is SO necessary and adds SO much. tubboâs response isnât really. as driven as âyourself.â with that period (.) would be. and, again, adding the period spins the meaning and narrative into something completely different (in a bad way!!! to me!!!! boooo booo tomato tomato etc!!!!)
because tubbo responds in a way that makes it seem like tommy asked him if the sky is blue. like, yeah, obviously yourself, what do you mean, boss man? because tubbo doesnât value himself in the same way tommy values him. and tommy doesnât value himself in the same way tubbo values him. thereâs a clash of ideals on both sides. thatâs what makes it so interesting!!!
but by removing the question mark you create this call and response of âi canât imagine myself without you / your personhood is important and i am here to remind you to value yourselfâ instead of the much stronger call and response of âi canât imagine myself without you / i canât imagine myself mattering (that much) to youâ and it drives me insane
#icarus speaks#i literally donât know how to tag this itâs just me being toxic#iâm not even a cclingy-er i just believe in their beliefs#not a cclingy-er but a ctubbo soldier which is why i think it drives me so crazy#YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HIMMMMMM. one thousand years in ctubbo literacy prison#you should not be allowed to post those quotes unless u can type me 100000 words on ctubbo and his thoughts on his own personhood
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Micah-10 & Mihaylova
#destiny 2#destiny 2 art#destiny the game#micah 10#mihaylova#i cannot get over bungie just being like 'hey here's the coolest character ever' and we get to hear her voice whenever we want????#me just doing loads of overthrows so i can listen to her speak <3#ANYWAYS hi i love her i'm sorry i don't post here often enough#juggling socmed hard#thank u mads for reminding me to post her here <333#destiny.#i need a better tag for my work lol#9R.
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every so often i have to relearn how to draw yuuji or he starts fighting me
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#yuji itadori#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuuji#ryomen sukuna#sukuna#i love drawing sukuna as the teeniest tiniest eye on yuuji's face n using it as an excuse 2 use his tag <3 ths his Rent#anyway he fought a bit at first but would u believe it i got yuuji 2 cooperate fr a draws pls clap#maybe it's just when hes in a piece with megumi that he gets an attitude??? whatever th case im happy w all of these thank god#beef w yuuji Settled fr now . until he inevitably decides 2 fight me again sighs#in the meantime !!! had SO much fun drawing his new scars#happy 2 report tht ive fully come around on yuuji 1eye itadori i wasnt sure at first but now i love it fr him#i love the texture of it i love splitting his eyebrow n drawing the scar tissue up Through the remaining hair....#i love him looking like he's winking i love drawing the lil X on his chibi#its GOOD#i dont think ill give him a fake eye very often if at all but it was fun putting him in tokyo ghoul cosplay fr this#o ya speaking of his Accessories the slippers started out as tigers also but then i wanted them bunnies and i saw an opportunity#so now miku is haunting this draws and my yuuji owns a pair of deco27 rabbit hole slippers#now that i rly look at it that whole fit is such a look actually im crying#we got beef shirt...#@ me @ sukuna @ the fact tht yuuji is Jacked#10/10 triple entendre 10/10 would wear
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watching the sunset together alive and well after early retirement <3
#your honor theyâre in love#someone needs to stop me from adding lighting like this in every drawing i do#like restrain me please#anyways they retired to a sheep farm in scotland and they also raise teacup pigs and goats and highland cows#also since i use tumblr tags as a confessional every time i hear a scottish man speak i imagine its soap#anyways#ghostsoap#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#call of duty#my art
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