#dry humour

[weepingfoxfury]

Who Ya Gonna Call?

I am now the (ahem) proud bearer/recipient of my third sting this year. Yay for me!

Two different wasps have stung my head ... and on Wednesday a bee stung my finger. The head stings were definitely worse.

The two wasps that stung me both left with their sharp and pointy lives ... alas, the bee is no more.

Honey bees are able to sting other insects and live as they can withdraw their stinger ... but, with human skin, it's too dense. End result ... as the bee dropped off my finger ... I was left with the stinger in my skin and the poor bee had been disembowled in the process.

This whole thing started as I attempted to help another insect out of it's drowning predicament ... by using a leaf to get it out of the bucket of water it was flailing in (and yes, i was responsible for the bucket of water being there.) Having chosen a leaf, I found the bee ... in trying to help the bee, I got stung, the bee went off to die and I raced to the kitchen to find tweezers to remove the sting. Meanwhile, the insect in the bucket also met its demise.

So ... as I have said before in other posts ... I really shouldn't try to help.

I'm now sitting giggling, imagining what kind of 'bat signal' people would send up into the sky asking for my help ... and thinking to myself that those people would have to be highly optimistic masochists... ;-D

[mattimus]

Dry but not arid

I love Castiel's sense of humour. His desert-dry autistic rizz that just occasionally switches mode into playfulness. He really commits to the deadpan angel bit for a full twelve seasons and that's the mark of a true seraphic wit. Immortality means you never have to rush the payoff to a gag.

Thematically, of course, this ties in nicely with Castiel's other enduring character trait of being thirsty as hell.

[bryonyashaw]

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[tamsinswriting]

Oh gosh. I can't stop laughing

Hi Neil!

Our librarian fraternity is suddenly split on whether or not you actually exist. Any comment on the matter?

I'm with the side that thinks I don't.

[wanjikusblog]

"Toby" welcomes you to Hell.

Rowan Atkinson is best known for his portrayal of the Mr Bean alter ego. But in this hilarious skit, Rowan's comedic talent takes on the role of Lucifer in which the Evil One takes a swipe at anybody who's anyone.

#comedy gold

[yrsonpurpose]

@rwrbsource & @rwrbmovie's rwrb appreciation month bingo henry: so, it turns out Henry can be funny. Alex adds that to his mental file.

[laurapetrie]

You must seriously get rid of those Gap sneakers. Our friendship cannot proceed in a growth oriented way until you realize how important this issue is to me. XO, Carolyn - CBK in a letter to Carole Radziwill

Nothing feels better than new clothes. That and vodka are your best friends. - CAROLYN BESSETTE KENNEDY

[weepingfoxfury]

The radio plays on and we're heading Out Of Africa. The Scuttlers have already been and stolen the airwaves at least once this morning, leaving nothing but the Flivivites to rampage through, hissing and popping until order was restored and the band played on. Weatherwise there's glimpses of sunshine but it is seriously cooooold out there. At least it's not raining! So woo hoo for that! I don't care what the traffic is doing ... it's far off in the distance and I don't have to join the melee today.

Not many apples this year, the weather Gods have smited their number and any that have grown are waaaaay up where I can't reach them. Gravity brought these ones to me, so 'Cheers!' gravity, I thank you kindly. Weird to have an Ireland that doesn't have the usual plethora of apple buckets lining the roads all saying 'Free', Help Yourself.'

The mice are busy making themselves at home. Grrrrrr! Brazen as you like. Even with two cats in the house and the canines, these critters truly don't give a shit. Loft Cat is a real thunder paws and lays siege at every turn. Captain Blackbeard couldn't give a crap. I'm old, he says ... 12 and counting ... and very much less than inclined to 'make friends' with the mice. Mr Snippy did give it a go the other night ... valiantly threw himself across the floor after one particularly 'run the gauntlet' kind of mouse decided to go the full length of the kitchen floor. However ... end result was Mr Snippy sliding, tumbling and going through a bout of sneezing ... whilst Mr Mousey disappeared once more up the curtain. Pretty sure he blew a raspberry at Mr Snippy once he'd reached the counter.

Friday, Friday, Friday ... time for breakfast and another mug of coffee ...

[ohbother2]

Adam reminds me of Lord Flashheart so much

(click for better quality)

[findmewheretheseameetsthesky]

Thinking about Shannon Messenger's hundreds of main characters and why none of them seem to be truly fleshed out and how i think it's due to Shannon's sense (or her idea of a high schooler's sense) /style of writing humor. What started out as a unique character trait for Keefe has eventually become a clutch for her, helping her dial down the drama in the books and in this essay I will-

[bryonyashaw]

[corrodedcoughin]

Overdramatic married to the bit and the aesthetic eddie munson would have black candles right? Would exclusively burn black candles whenever he has the chance. And every time he forgets that black candles have repercussions. So when he sneezes and it’s black snot that comes out he convinces himself he’s got ‘the plague’ and every time Wayne just gives him this withering stare and goes back to watching tv because Eddie’s just crawled out of his bedroom, dragging himself along the floor giving it ‘uncle, fair and noble uncle, I fear the consumption had taken me. Look for me tomorrow and you shall find a grave man’

Wayne takes a sip of his coffee and lets Eddie know ‘I’ll make sure the Garfield mug goes to a good home, son’ and suddenly Eddie crawling back to his room, Garfield mug in tow muttering about nobody appreciating his dramatic flair. Steve is sat in silence on the couch with Wayne, watched the whole thing without saying a word and honestly? Would pay to see it again. Maybe plots to buy more black candles so that it will happen again

[wanjikusblog]

A very wordy coup in Her Majesty's civil service.

In so many words, Sir Frank proves that he can do part of Humphrey's job.

Fans of the comedic show 'Yes Minister' and its spin-off 'Yes, Prime Minister,' will recall that the British civil service has never seen anyone quite as long-winded as cabinet secretary Sir Humphrey. Which is not to say that on his day, the Head of the Treasury couldn't give Humphrey a run for his money.

[shitapril]

oscar piastri posting cheeky comments on alpine's instagram page actually made me smile so wide - it really shows that he was just finding his footing last year and he's more comfortable joking around now (his yuki interaction too omg) and he's only gunna get funnier

also in my head him and alpine have reconciled now and all is well :')

[imaginariumgeographica]

"I'm a little vain" "I had no idea" is another banger from the guy who brought you "for the assassination or the heir" and "not noticeably, your majesty"