#drawing them together is a free therapy
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Comfort characters 💛
#comfort character#comfort characters#arthur morgan#rdr 2#spirit stallion of the cimarron#spirit#fanart#drawing#illustration#red dead redemption arthur#red dead redemption 2#sketch#doodle#coldbloodedkriart#artwork#horse art#horse#digital art#arthur morgan sketch#horse sketch#equine#animal art#friends#they're two peas in a pod#they have my heart#art#drawing them together is a free therapy#rdr community
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very busy babysitting a duo of kittens (only two months old) the last few days but i shall be drawing when i return home (this includes requests)
and also if anyone wants to see the babies send an ask and i can post them in response hehe i have taken SO many photos
#yew branch#also i just missed a step on the stairs going down and ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow#i am now trapped on the couch until my back stops exploding at least a bit#upside tho is that the kittens are playing together on the couch#sometimes right on my lap!! theyre so so so so cute#i adore them#BUT YEAH i shall be drawing when i return home provided my back allows me to sit upright by that time#bc it sure isnt rn GDJSGJS#im sad ill have to go home tho.. these kittens are some of the cutest beasts alive#life is worth living because every day kittens are playing and having fun#i miiiiiiight be able to indirectly take one#one of my best friends might possibly be able/willing to take one and keep her with her own cat for me#until i move out of my parents house mid next year#so i might get to have... kitten that ive watched grow up from newborns...#the story behind these kittens is that one of my other best friends took in a stray and she turned out to be pregnant#and had these two!!#im also watching the three adult cats in this house but theyre not nearly as much of a handful#as can be imagined this friend is very tired of having 5 cats in the house regardless of how small two of them are GDJSVSN#which is very very understandable#i dont think i would want five cats unless i had a fairly large house. if i had a large house and plenty of free time most of each day#to give them play time and tons of affection#as well as the physical ability to keep up with them all#then id gladly have five cats#who knows maybe someday ill have a nice big house and plenty of spare time and my ddd will be under control#but that doesnt seem likely#aside from ddd being managed! because i have a pain relieving steroid injection tomorrow and then ill be starting physical therapy!!#im excited and i have a lot of hope for at least the physical therapy to help#PLUS THEY HAVE A POOL FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!!!!! AND I LOVE SWIMMING ESPECIALLY AS A GENTLE WORKOUT#and low impact things are very important for my body specifically i cant do high impact exercise or itll hurt me#plus i just love being in water i swear i was meant to be an aquatic elf from dnd
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❥﹒♡﹒☕﹒ 𝗼𝗳𝗳-𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗶 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗼 𝘁𝗼 𝗱𝗲-𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀 ( just pretend i wasn't gone for months guys )
between smartphones, computers, ipads, and screens everywhere, sometimes i feel like i have pudding instead of a brain and i need to engage in three-dimensional activities that don't involve staring at pixels all day, here are some ideas to get in touch with creativity and real word again.
𝟭. drawing and colouring ( 🎨 )
whether it's drawing landscapes, characters from your favorite series or simple doodles, putting the pen on the paper relaxes me instantly. if you are not good at freehand drawing or you're simply lazy, there are many coloring books for adults with mandalas (my personal favorites) or animals/natural landscapes, also online you can find many drawings to color that you can print. in discount stores you can find packs of colored markers at a great price, after all we don't need to be professionals.
𝟮. puzzles and diamond paintings ( 🧩 )
i recently discovered diamond paintings and i'm obsessed with them, on amazon you can find many sets with amazing designs and composing them is really relaxing. having something to focus on for a few hours a day is really essential, puzzles are perfect for this purpose too.
𝟯. reading and writing ( 📚 )
this is a more challenging activity, when we are burnout the last thing we want to do is use our brain, but reading a good novel or writing down a few pages in your journal can distract you from the present moment and give you a bit of a break while still keeping you productive. every second spent reading or writing is a second invested in your personal growth.
𝟰. experiment with outfits and makeup ( ✨ )
i have a lot of clothes but zero outfits, my favorite activity is decluttering my closet, putting away things i don't wear anymore and experimenting with new styles. also sitting at my desk and trying new makeup that's different from my usual eyeliner and mascara, i find it so fun and it's a great way to reconnect with my image when i've spent a month stuck in my room studying.
𝟱. cooking and baking ( 🧁 )
i'm not a good cook and i've burned more cakes than i care to admit, but i have to say it's terribly fun and therapeutic, especially if you're cooking with someone. u think anyone who cooks professionally hates having a second person in the kitchen with them, but when friends make a cake (ugly but tasty) and then eat it together in front of a cup of steaming tea - now, now, that's real therapy.
𝟲. working out, dancing, doing yoga ( 🩰 )
put on some music, dance in your room, follow your workout routine, lay out a mat and do stretching or yoga, connect with your body after being locked in your mind, physical activity is very important to keep your mind fresh ( mens sana in corpore sano ). if you can, go to a park, or an open space, just be careful of excessive stimuli.
these are some of the things i do, feel free to comment on your de-stressing activities.
#college#education#school#academia#note taking#student#study aesthetic#study blog#study inspiration#study motivation#light academia#academic overachiever#dark academia#academic validation#college student#student life#studying#study community#study notes#study space#study tips#studyblr#studyblr community#self improvement#university life#uni life#university#uni student#creativity
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Blood of A Rose - Turning Point (Art the Clown x Fem!Reader)
Masterlist
Summary - (Y/n) has always dealt with harsh criticism when it came to her work, but that never meant she was immune.
Notes - Sorry for the wait for a new post! I decided that weekends will be my off days from writing to preserve my sanity 💀
Word Count - 2,031
Warning(s) - Bullying, violence, mild gore
Song Inspiration -
Acsida - Privet Privet 2009
(Y/n)’s small living room was dimly lit by soft, flickering candlelight, casting shadows across the walls that seemed to stretch and twist in strange patterns as her TV hummed in the background. She sat on the floor, legs outstretched as her back leaned against the couch, absentmindedly working on a small canvas resting on her lap.
Art lounged on the couch behind her, his head tilted as he silently browsed through channels, glancing down at (Y/n) and her work occasionally. His now pristine hand played with her hair mindlessly, combing his fingers through it as he found the texture satisfying.
(Y/n) didn’t mind, though. It made her aware of his otherwise silent presence, which she had come to call home. It soothed her and kept her relaxed as she worked.
Through their time together, they soon found that regardless of nearly being polar opposites, her more calm and reserved demeanor greatly complimented his boldness and chaos. Their shared interest in death was what drew them to each other, but everything else just seemed to perfectly fall into place for them.
Art surprisingly came to respect her personality as she respected his. It was refreshing for him, in a way, which he never thought was even possible until she proved him otherwise.
It started out as curiosity, wanting to understand how someone with such interests could be so tame. That curiosity then grew into an obsession, taking note of her smallest behaviors. Whether it was the way her nose twitched when she didn’t like something, or simply her breathing patterns. He knew everything there was to know about her.
She dabbed her brush into a deep crimson, dragging it across the canvas in harsh, deliberate strokes. (Y/n) could feel Art’s gaze lingering on the piece, and for a moment, she wondered what ran through his head when he saw her art.
“You like it?” She asked, her voice soft and curious.
Art didn’t respond with words, as usual. Instead, he sat up, his silent movements almost ghostly as he leaned over her shoulder. His head cocked from one side to the other as he carefully observed the piece. He then grinned with a thumbs up, patting her shoulder in approval. She placed her free hand over his.
“Thanks.” (Y/n) giggled.
“I just don’t understand how someone would think it’s appropriate to ever publicize something like that.”
The laughter stopped, both of them looking up to the TV screen settled on a talk show.
“I mean, think of the children! They could run into it on the internet and be traumatized and need therapy.”
(Y/n)’s gaze hardened, heart beginning to race as she took in their insults. She chewed her lip as she watched, nearly drawing blood.
“Trust me, I don’t think they’re the only ones who need therapy -“
The channel suddenly changed, remote in Art’s hand as he frowned at the screen and waved it off in distaste. He then looked down at (Y/n) who began to calmly clean up her area.
Too calmly.
She stood up, taking her supplies with her as she made her way to the sink to clean everything off. His eyes followed her carefully, paying attention to every minor difference or change. As soon as he caught her mouth twitch he rose from the couch.
He walked over to her, or rather stalked, and slapped a hand on the counter beside the sink as he faced her, leaning against it. She didn’t look at him until she was finished cleaning, drying her hands and giving him her best smile, albeit fake.
His grin was wide, encouraging, and he motioned for her to do the same with his fingers. When she didn’t and simply giggled half heartedly, his smile dropped and he tapped his chin in thought.
Art’s expression then turned mischievous, baring his teeth again with a Cheshire smile as his hands slowly reached for her, his fingers wiggling menacingly.
“No.” (Y/n) pleaded at first, taking a hesitant step back. “No - Art!”
She shrieked when he snatched her, holding her against him as he tickled her relentlessly. He laughed silently as she squirmed and cackled, using all of her strength to try and worm her way out of his grip, but they both knew he was far too strong for such a feat.
“Okay! Art, I’m fine - I’m okay now!” The clown stopped tickling, but still held her. He peeked his head from around her to watch her face to determine if she was lying or not.
As (Y/n) caught her breath, she looked up at Art with the usual glimmer in her eye that he so adored and he firmly nodded before letting her go.
She sighed dramatically and he wiped his hands off together proudly, giving her an ‘ok’ symbol with a wink and heading back to the couch with a pep in his step.
(Y/n) shook her head in exasperation, rubbing at her temple before following him.
The following day, they both worked in silence at their hideout. Art sat at his workbench, tinkering away while (Y/n) sat on the floor against the stove beside the desk, filtering through her photos on her camera. A small radio played in the background, (Y/n) humming to a familiar song every now and then while Art nodded along with her.
It was one of their calmer nights, the two of them deciding not to go out and to simply spend time with each other, even if it was just sitting in the other’s company.
(Y/n) saw Art’s hand motion for her in her peripherals, looking up at him finally. He pointed to her then to the stool left unused, then to the floor and flung his hand out as an exasperated question.
“I’m comfortable, Art, I promise.”
(Y/n) giggled when his head ticked at her stubbornness. He then pointed back at the stool aggressively, and then next to the edge of the desk with a determined expression.
“You want me to be closer to you?” Art nodded and she laughed. “Well why didn’t you just say that?”
She nearly snorted as she stood up when Art threw out it arms, silently telling her ‘what the fuck?’. She brought the stool over to his desk and sat on top of it, camera in hand for her to resume what she had previously been doing.
Her laughter died down to a chuckle. “You know I love teasing you, I hardly ever get to.” (Y/n) reached out and gave his hand a quick squeeze. Art rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out at her before turning back to continue modifying one of his weapons.
“I personally think she’s just trying to use shock value to get some traction on her work.”
Their ears caught as they continued to work, however Art glanced over at (Y/n) every now and then.
“She’s trying so hard to shove it down our throats for attention when it’s nothing more than glorified gore.”
“Be glad I don’t shove something else down your throats…” (Y/n) grumbled to herself, the initial pain of their insults gradually seeping through into anger and irritability.
The clown’s movements froze at her words as he stared at the desk in front of him with parted lips.
With however long they had been together, not once had he heard her threaten another person, regardless if it was empty or not. She had always kept quiet and to herself when met with confrontation while he was the one who dealt with it accordingly. At least, what he considered to be accordingly.
Art slowly shifted his eyes over to look at her, seeing her click the buttons on her camera casually as if she never said anything.
And for once, he wondered if he was going crazy.
He then looked back at the weapon in front of him, glanced at her once more, then slowly went back to working.
One night, however, they decided to go out once they began to feel a sense of boredom, something they both passionately detested.
Feeling particularly clingy, (Y/n) took to latching herself onto Art’s arm rather than just holding his hand. He gladly accepted it, throwing her a giddy smile and practically shaking with excitement.
As they walked, (Y/n) noticed how much more comfortable she had become walking out in public. Art fed into her confidence, deliberately or not, and she held her head higher. He made her feel appreciated, feel important in a world where all she had before him was herself and the captious stares of those around her.
On the more rare occasions where she walked out on the town by herself to grab a bite to eat or restock on supplies, she crawled back into herself ever so slightly. Regardless, she was still more self-assured than she previously had been.
“Maybe something with feet? I feel like I don’t focus on feet enough.” (Y/n) thought out.
Art simply listened from beside her, genuinely intrigued and in his own thoughts about what he could do with his next victim - or victims - for her.
She gasped suddenly and Art, ever the dramatic, jumped with a surprised expression. “A mouth!” (Y/n) looked over at him with an animated expression.
Art tilted his head at her with his eyebrows raised, letting her know that he agreed.
“Mouth it is tonight.” The clown wiggled his eyebrows at her perversely and she lightly backhanded his chest.
“Oh shit, are you (Y/n)?” They heard a somewhat distant voice express. Ahead of them, a woman leaned against a wall, phone in hand as she waited beside a small food joint.
Art and (Y/n) shared a suspicious look, continuing to walk until they were close enough to decently communicate. “Yes?” She answered with caution.
Art made a simple decision from beside her, accepting the woman’s unwilling offer that was too easy to pass as he set down his bag while they talked. “This is so weird seeing you in person. I always hear about you but never thought I’d actually meet you!”
(Y/n)’s eyes squinted with confusion, unsure of where the interaction was going to lead to. “Thanks? Like is that supposed to be a compliment?” She replied warily, almost irritably.
“Oh no, I’m not a fan or anything, it’s just weird finally seeing someone you hear about a lot.” (Y/n) deadpanned, a familiar feeling of distaste building in her abdomen.
Art, however, rather than growing defensive and upset, looked over at her curiously, letting the conversation work itself out with underlying mischief.
“It’s like if you met Jeffrey Dahmer in person, you’d just look at them like what the fuck, because of the shit they’ve done, y’know?”
(Y/n)’s tongue ran along the inside of her cheek, casually looking over at the clown’s bag on the ground. As the woman continued to ramble, (Y/n) stepped over to it and began to search through its contents.
Art’s eyes widened, a grin spreading wide across his painted face in anticipation. “Like if the word edgy was a person -“
The woman was cut off as a shot echoed through the town.
Art watched as the woman slid off of the wall and thumped onto the ground, then eased his eyes to look over at (Y/n).
Arm straight out, the gun in her hand pointed at the bleeding woman with an indifferent expression, then lowered with a heavy sigh as she turned to toss it back into his bag after turning on the safety.
“I’m tired of this shit.” She mumbled to herself and rubbed at her forehead then looked up at Art. “Sorry. Let’s go find someone else for you.”
Art was rigid where he stood, staring at her with an intensity that began to pull her out of her vexed state. He took a step towards her with predatory intent, grabbing the back of her neck and tugging her into him, their lips crashing together unexpectedly.
(Y/n) froze at first, caught off guard by his behavior before she slowly began to melt into it, cupping his jaw in her hands. She gasped breathlessly for air when they parted as he silently heaved.
“Does that mean I’m next?” She whispered. He flashed his teeth sadistically, leaning in once more.
Tag list: @callsignwidow
#art the clown x reader#art x reader#art the clown#art#x reader#terrifier x reader#terrifier 1#terrifier 2#terrifier#david howard thornton#damien leone#angst#angst with a happy ending#blood of a rose#fanfiction#fanfic#clown
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Bed Buddies
A/n: I’m supposed to be writing kinktober day five but I had this idea and just couldn’t leave it
Warnings: smut, degrading, age difference, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!
James had been having trouble sleeping and couldn’t find a way to fix it, he went to Kirk thinking he’d have something and he gave him something.
Some spiritual thing James didn’t want to be bothered with. Still, he was out of options, worst comes to worst he wastes a hundred bucks.
He was told he had to have a room set up with a couch or two, a dark room with no windows, and a bed, a few small tables wouldn’t hurt.
He went out for a run, thinking it might help him sleep, not that it worked before, when he got back there you were setting up some candles on the nightstands around the bed, a notebook set on the coffee table between two couches.
You smiled over at him when you saw him and gestured for him to sit down. “Your daughter let me in.” You said, calming his nerves because he had no idea how you’d gotten there.
He nodded and sat on one couch. You finished lighting the candles, the honey lavender aroma filling the room, and went to sit on the couch across from him, picking up the notebook and pen, opening to the first page and writing stuff down, the date, the client, etc.
“So, you haven’t been sleeping?” You started.
James nodded. “Why else would I have brought you here?” He asked, a little more aggression in his tone than needed, and he knew it. It didn’t phase you much, all your clients were rich and snooty, plus he hadn’t been sleeping much and you knew that much.
“Some people just want some relax time, like a message type thing.” You explained. “Enough on other people, I want to hear about you.” You said, leaning in a little more.
It was hard to get James to talk, you found that out pretty quick, but it was your first day together so you took it slow, letting him take his time to get comfortable.
The session was about relaxing his body, finding out what was causing him to lose sleep with what little information he was giving you.
You found that drawing on his back calmed him down, not just random doodles but actually tracing his back, finding dots and connecting them.
He managed to fall asleep before 4:00 am so he was counting it as a win and invited you back, becoming a permanent client fairly fast.
After a month or so you found him getting much more comfortable with you, speaking more freely, sitting next to you on the couch.
“Lay with me.” He asked, looking up at you as he laid on his back on the bed in the room.
You chuckled at that and shook your head. “Come on, on your stomach, it’s your favourite.” You said, holding up the black marker you used.
“Yeah, yeah, I know.” He said, rolling onto his stomach. “Sometimes I just like something to hold in my sleep, what’s so wrong about that, huh?”
You shook your head at that, but he insisted. He didn’t get you to cuddle that night but he didn’t stop asking.
As his little therapy sessions before hand became more free spoken, his hands and eyes began opening more as well. He’d sit closer, gaze trailing over your body, hands lightly touching your knees.
You’d made a promise you’d never sleep with your clients, that being said most of your clients were women, even if they weren’t they were old and gross and hateful vermin, it was easy to find their advances annoying and unwanted.
James was different.
You found yourself craving his touch and wearing tighter or more revealing clothing, when he asked for cuddles after it was getting harder and harder to say no to him.
James had your face shoved into the pillow, one hand on your back to keep you there and the other gripping your hip so tightly it was sure to leave bruises.
The room echoed with your moans and cries for him as he slammed himself into you over and over, deep groans falling from his lips.
“Fuck, darlin��, you feel so good~” He mused, rotating his hips in smooth circles, driving you insane. “So fucking tight, no one’s fucked you right a minute, huh, sweetheart?” He asked leaning down to you.
You shook your head, whining as he slowed his pace, taking away yet another high you’d been so, so close to.
He brought the hand that was on your hip up before bringing it down on your ass, leaving a pink mark in its wake. “Words, slut.”
“No-no, sir, I-I haven’t.” You stuttered out, hands gripping the sheets tighter.
James laughed loudly before it got interrupted by another groan. “That’s my darling, my good girl.”
#metallica x reader#metallica smut#metallica imagines#metallica rp#metallica fanfiction#80s metal#metallica#james hetfield x you#james hetfield x reader#james hetfield fluff#james hetfield smut#james hetfield fanfiction#james hetfield
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characters as adults
i sometimes throw up in my mouth thinking about my old art style im so much happier and expressive except i havent figured out how to add color lmaooooo
im thinking these are everyone in their early 30s
i think sophie would become a keeper... bc its literally in the series title... maybe emissary too? anyway i dont think shed be the happiest in her position but i think when she grows up she'll start to resemble oralie a lot. maybe some people will put two and two together but this might be eons after oralie resigns from the council and it becomes a little irrelevant at that point
sophie WILL go bald at a certain point when she has the biggest existential crisis
i dont know how to draw dex in general because i just dont have a clear image of who he is this late into the series... bc its been such a long time since book 9 and i havent preordered 9.5 yet
i think he might actually be the most successful out of everyone bc everyone seems to agree that he's a very talented technopath and he worked with the council when he was only a level three??? even if it was making sophie's circlet???? very impressive accepted into harvard 10/10
i love drawing biana shes just ugh. very gorgeous. cant tell if she'll live a celebrity life in the elven world or shed just mysteriously disappear for the longest time and have everyone speculate on what happened to the youngest vacker and she just comes back with like a billion luster book deal to write an autobiography of what she was up to and its basically her freaking out over the ugliest fashion trends ("i leave for three centuries and you guys make THIS a trending item of clothing????") bc biana will always stay biana
linh will cut her hair along with the silver tips. still do not know how the silver tip works. i love drawing her moles, i feel she just has to have a lot of them around her face. she volunteers for animal rehabilitation. she gives free seminars for young hydrokinetics to teach them how to control their abilities. what a woman
im the iffiest with his rendition but he probably grew out the silver tips with his sister and he toggles between keeping his bangs out of his face and keeping it down
weirdly, i think hed be a teacher of some sorts. maybe tutor for 5-10 year olds? i feel like hed be good with small kids
they get their ears pierced together. keefe's a little sadder as an adult. he also grew out his hair
fitz hasn't changed his style much
not sure why keefe is sad. i feel like the older he got in the series, the more sadder he got. it makes sense-- id be sad too. later on, he'll be happy again but i think seeing how long an elven lifespan is theyre probably still considered babies. he has time to figure it out
it'd be really nice if fitz became an author or journalist. i think alden should quit his job as emissary and write an autobiography. i think all the vackers should start journaling and not join evil organizations as a mode of therapy.
#kotlc#kotlc fanart#biana vacker#fitz vacker#linh song#sophie foster#tam song#dex dizznee#kotlc sophie#kotlc tam#kotlc dex#kotlc linh#kotlc fitz#kotlc biana#keefe sencen#kotlc keefe#kotlc thoughts#kotlc fandom
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your p.ai.nter and your surface au are making me ILL (positive) im a huge huge fan ...
UM! if youd allow me to ask can you tell me all about surface au .... i need to know everything about them so i can be MORE ILL ABOUT THEM!!
HIHIHI!!! AUGH I finally have time to sit down and yap, I've been thinking about this ask all day SKJSJCJ AAAA FIRST AND FOREMOST I'm so glad you're enjoying it and it's making you deathly ill!!!! Good!!! Suffer!!! Along with me and the five other mentally unbalanced watercolor heathens here 🙂↕️ /silly
So!! Originally I thought it up just as an excuse to draw human(ish) Seb kissing and cuddling a robot in dire need of it, but then I Thought some more and it transformed into a hurt/comfort/healing au?? The healing being from the shared trauma they endured back at the Blacksite (working through it via various measures and expanding their relationship as a whole), while simultaneously learning how to function in a modern world they are very much unfamiliar with
The general premise is Sebastian gains most of his human form back, with Painter to help assist him in recovery, like physical therapy and reintroducing him to society XD Sebastian having a difficult time processing emotions now that he's free and it all has time to sink in, etc etc~ The same goes for Painter, however, and they're just gonna have to work it out together cuz they got BAGGAGE no therapist is qualified for. Our dear Painter has their fair share of shit too, such as the sapiency debate most people have an aversion to (because how could an object process thoughts and emotions in a meaningful way?? Unheard of! /sar)
And the rest is just domestic silliness because they're allowed some happiness 😁 and because I'm under the firm belief Sebastian would become a house wife if someone let him /hj
But that's basically it!! One big fat drawing prompt really (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) I commend you for making it through this whole yap sesh fr 🙏 if you're still interested just let me know and if I have sudden Thoughts I'm more than happy to drop them unannounced 💥💥💥 DOODLES FROM MY SHITFIC AS A TREAT‼️
#YAYYY YIPPEEEEE TARGET AUDIENCE REACHED#I APPRECIATE YOU SO MUCH ACTUALLY I WAS LOOKING FOR AN EXCUSE TO YAP#should i start tagging this appropriately??? idek dude i didn't expect the idea to breach containment#pressure surface au#sebpainter#watercolor pressure#sebastian x painter#spicy art
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with him being calm and collected, good with cars, reliable friend, etc etc i want to see imperfect tommy. what do you think he's *not* good at?
i love the headcanon that he can't cook, but in ~my head, the man knows his way around a kitchen.
he's dyslexic. he has multiple ways of dealing with this, given that he also deals with auditory processing, but having Evan around has been a game-changer, because his boyfriend will break shit down for him into minute detail and he doesn't have to read shit.
Tommy loves chocolate. He's really good about maintaining his diet for the most part, especially because he loves bodybuilding, but when he gets his hands on candy, it's like a green-eyed monster appears. He absolutely WILL fight with Evan over who ate the last brownie, or who finished the last of the kisses out of the candy bowl and didn't have replacements on hand. (it's usually him, but he's not going to admit it)
getting raw about the trauma he hasn't processed. our boy has done years of therapy and is pretty good about being able to be open about what he's faced/moved on from. but there are some things that he keeps close to his chest and still struggles with, and he definitely struggles with being honest about having problems about his triggers. Evan can always tell though when he's been triggered because Tommy is so good at being calm no matter the situation that when something does bother him, it's all over his face, and Evan won't move forward until they've at least discussed what brought it on.
picking up his clothes. look, he's lived by himself for almost two decades. he knows what he's looking for and where he last left it, and if he needs to find those socks, he left them in the bathroom. he'll find them later. (this drives Evan crazy and they argue about it a lot. there's a hamper in almost every room now.)
he can't deal with upsetting kids. he's constantly got a separate part of his chocolate stash now, just for Jee, Chris, Denny, and Mara. of course, he tells them regularly, "if your parents find out, you didn't get it from me" (Evan swears he knows nothing about this). (all their friends absolutely know it's Tommy giving their kids sugar). (he refuses to buy sugar-free)
-this does bite him in the ass one time. he gives Jee chocolate after she bangs her knee one night, jumping at him from the couch and hitting the coffee table. she's fine pretty quickly, but she's also up way past her bedtime because of the snack
he has NO organization of his music or movie library. again, this makes Evan crazy. Evan has specifically curated playlists for everything (including the one they share in which they're constantly sending one another songs that make them think of each other), and Tommy just willy-nilly throws things together (or worse, lets Spotify curate his Daily's and is satisfied with those.) When Tommy proposes, the first thing Evan tells him is that he's in charge of the music, lest their first dance end up being something god-awful suggested by the internet.
he can draw. he can paint. he can throw a pot. he can shoot photos decently (not as well as Evan). he can't sew to save his own life.
also, on the food thing: Evan is great with recipes. Tommy can just do natural chemistry in the kitchen. however, whenever he tries to follow a recipe, he ends up fucking it up. cooking together ends up always being an adventure because of this, because Evan is very meticulous about how things are made, but Tommy goes by his tastebuds and what sounds good. sometimes it works out. sometimes they end up ordering takeout.
...sometimes someone ends up covered in dessert toppings.
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#𝓣𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗘! wannabe chart topper.
there is a certain sense of degradation and shame that comes with being a well-known industry figure not for what you create, but for how terrible you seem to be at it. no matter what genre or style it seems you just haven’t got the midas touch. your friends aren’t gonna let that stop you from doing the thing you love—no, not creating music, silly! publicly shaming your exes through song!
or, there is no better cure for heartache than money, revenge, and clout (in that order).
POST CREDITS! —
There's a heavy sigh that escapes Asahi's lips as he closes out from the group chat. Normally the mood isn't so...dour, and the seldom times it is it appears to be a product of his own doing. Yet to see you, especially, so downtrodden upset him. Asahi knows that everyone becomes sad for one reason or another, naturally, but the ever-confident Y/N L/N being insecure? Unfathomable, he declares.
From the day he met you, you have been a rock. Not just in his life, but also in his idealized version of you. Of everyone in the group, you had one of the bigger personalities—it was hard to know for sure if yours was the biggest when Tendou is being...Tendou. Regardless, you always carried yourself like you knew you could buy the entirety of Japan with your pocket change.
You couldn’t, of course—you didn’t even come close. But the unwavering confidence you held in that you could was admirable, if not slightly arrogant. In Asahi’s mind though, it took a certain type of person to be selfish, headstrong, self-centered. And to pull it off so well that he didn’t even hate them? He had to give flowers where they’re due.
And if you're none of those things, you're a damn good actor—and maybe that's part of your "star power" too. You had him fooled, and he's sure you'll fool the entire world too. So, with a bit of selfishness, he'll continue to remain by your side and push you into the limelight so he can bask in that aura once more. Even when he knows it isn't real.
You are a rock, the one which holds their entire rag-tag group together. You are the post in which the ship hauls their anchor upon. You are the jagged edges which cut through those who earn your ire, drawing blood. You are softened by the crashing tides which erode at your exterior. You really are special, and he can't imagine you being anyone else.
"Oi, are you still listening?"
Asahi snaps to attention. He had completely forgot he was on the phone with Yuu, so absorbed with his thoughts. The lack of sleep was also likely to blame as he teetered from left to right, eyes hovering open just a crack. Still, he makes a great effort to not look like he was totally spacing out.
"Ah, yeah I am! Sorry..."
"Right," Yuu drags the word on for a few seconds "Anyways, like I was saying..."
NOTES! —
Rise and shine (ursine)! Today is a new day, and I'm aiming to double post today, so be on the lookout for that! Ah, but don't hold me accountable if I don't either—I get out from my classes late today and commute in peak traffic, so the second chapter may be released wayyyy later today or not at all (until tomorrow that is wkwk). Anyways, today's fundraiser goes towards supporting Rachel Pikrel-Hawkins and her children in Colorado.
Rachel's ex husband, Michael Hawkins, is a retired police sergeant and convicted felon and sex offender for the continuous rape and sexual assault of his daughter and two adopted daughters. However, he is free from custody while Rachel is in jail for objecting to court-ordered reunification therapy between Michael and two of their sons. The case is beyond horrifying and revolting, and I recommend reading into it further in the description of the GoFundMe page. If you are able to assist Rachel in paying for attorneys to defend her and her children in court, please consider donating here and sharing their story with others.
If you’ve noticed, the “blind items” section looks different today! That’s because it’s supposed to be an in-universe bonus section for gossip and rumors, usually about what happened in the screenshots. However for this conversation, obviously nobody is telling any gossip pages about this, so I replaced it with “Post Credits”! Now whenever there are no blind items, this section will appear instead and will detail the inner thoughts, feelings, and opinions of the characters—or, just anything that didn't make the cut. These are all still canonical, but weren't included in the chapter for a platitude of reasons (conflicting pov, limited time, etc.) Please take these crumbs of writing as a sign of my gratitude for all you readers!
PREV + MASTERLIST + NEXT
© all rights reserved—edelfie (2024) // do not plagiarize, modify, copy, use, translate, or repost my work on other sites without permission
#༄ — taste#?! — edelfie#//#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu smau#smau#hq#hq smau#hq x reader#haikyuu reader insert#miya atsumu x reader#atsumu x reader
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Restoring the Roots (Joel Miller x Therapist! reader)
Chapter 1: Pre-Contemplation
Chapter 2 here | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | main masterlist |
Pairing: Joel Miller x therapist! reader, post outbreak Rating: none, will be changed to explicit in future chapters (slow burn, eventual smut, age gap) Summary: Life after moving to Jackson looks drastically different for Joel, survival mode is over and now he and Ellie can finally put down new roots. Ellie adapts easily but Joel finds himself struggling to settle into this new life, in more ways than some. At Ellie and Tommy’s insistence, Joel begrudgingly finds himself in therapy to try and work through his struggles but what he encounters is more than just painful memories and deeply rooted trauma. A/N: I cannot say enough thank you's to the number of lovely humans who encouraged this idea and supported me as I embark on my very first fic! And what better Pedro character to be the guinea pig for this idea? Lots of this story draws on my personal knowledge as a social worker, as I am working towards becoming a certified equine assisted therapist. Consequently, there are lots of horsey terms, therapy terms, and vivid descriptions of trauma at certain points. Feel free like, comment, or reblog if you enjoy it :)
Taglist (for now): @beskarandblasters, @pr0ximamidnight, @theewokingdead, @atinylittlepain, @prolix-yuy, @swiftispunk, @harriedandharassed, @amywritesthings
If anyone wants to be on the taglist please let me know! If you don't want to be on it then also let me know lol.
~~~~~~~
You sat up taller in your chair, arching your back and rolling your shoulders in an effort to stretch out your spine, exhaling softly as you heard the cacophony of crunches and protests from your muscles. You had been hunched over your notepad for over an hour, eyebrows scrunched together and your mind running on autopilot, as you caught up on client notes that you had fallen behind on for the last couple days. The downside of having a small therapy practice, hell any therapy practice, was that there was a never ending litany of documentation to fill out. Seeing as you were the only therapist in the tiny commune of Jackson, there was never a shortage of clients and consequently, never a shortage of session notes that you had to write.
“Hun.”
You hear your name spoken in a warm tone from behind you. You barely look up from the page as you try to rewrite the word ‘diagnosis’ after what feels like the fifth time. The word has basically lost all its meaning at this point.
“Honey, c’mon, the sun is about ready to set and you can wrap that up tomorrow.” The cover page to the notepad closes on top of your hand and you look up to see your assistant, Tracey, giving you a knowing look and then glancing towards the front of the office. You follow her gaze to the front windows and take in the deep ember orange hue washing over the business faces and windows on the opposite side of the street, signaling the end of another day. Sighing softly, you lean back in your chair and cross your arms over your chest with a frown. You know she’s right and yet you still have the same dispute every day.
“Trace, you and I both know that if I don’t get them done today, they will just be added to tomorrow’s to do list, besides this is the last one I swear,” you say to her with a smirk, as if she has not heard that excuse before.
You were never the kind of person to half-ass your responsibilities at your job, including client documentation, even if there was no longer any governing body or association to uphold professional social work standards. You did your job with integrity, even the mundane administrative tasks that involved more writing than actual talking with clients. Tracey knew this of course, it was something she admired about you, how suited you were for this line of work. It was clear that you cared deeply for the clients that you supported. But it doesn’t mean it was not a fight when the end of the workday rolled around and she had to tear you away from your desk and practically shove you out of the office door.
She rolled her eyes at you and her lips curled into a small smile as she headed towards the door with her coat and bag in tow. “Promise me you will at least be out of here before the night patrol starts?” She points her finger at you as she stops just ahead of the door. You nod and wave her off as you turn your focus back to the notepad, smoothing your palm over the words etched into the cover ‘Restorative Reins.’
You had only been in Jackson for roughly over a month, though it felt like much longer. Much like everyone else who had survived the outbreak and came to find refuge in the small settlement after the world went to shit, you were grateful to accept any basic decencies of normal life that were afforded to you. Warm meals, warm showers, hell running water in general was a miracle in and of itself at that point. So when you actually arrived in Jackson, you were dumbfounded to see how much normalcy surrounded you. Children running and playing in the streets, storefronts of various thriving businesses, sheep being rounded up in a nearby corral - hold on, a fucking MOVIE THEATER?
While it took some time to grow out of the perpetual fight or flight mode that you were entrenched in from life on the road, you did eventually fall into a good pace in Jackson. Especially after getting involved in the community and taking up the job as the local therapist, you had never been busier, and you loved it.
The world felt unflinchingly obsolete post outbreak, but being able to support others with their mental health never failed to bring you joy and an unshakeable sense of purpose. You wanted to help others as they navigated their pain and broke down the mental blocks that entrapped them in their trauma. You wanted to help them realize the innate strength that they possessed. Sadly, you never got the chance to practice long term, as you finished up grad school just before the outbreak happened. But that didn’t seem to matter now as you had an endless stream of community members that you saw on a weekly basis at your practice, all with their own pain and struggles, seeking support.
It was crazy to think about the short period of time that had passed since you started at the job, how much you had done for the residents, how much more that you wanted to do. You were pulled from your memories when the office phone rang, internally groaning as you looked at your watch.
4:58 p.m. Of course.
Steeling yourself you picked up the phone, praying that it was a quick call.
“Restorative Reins Practice, how can I help you?” you answered.
“Oh! hi ma'am,” a warm, mellow Southern drawl greets you on the other end. “Are you the local therapist that has been helpin’ folks out around here with their mental health?”
"That's me,” you reply warmly, “what can I do for you?”
The man hesitates briefly, “Well, I was uh wanting to know a bit more about the business I guess, how the therapy process works, fees and stuff for someone who was interested in getting help. Not me though, it’s not for me, it’s for my brother, Joel. My name is Tommy by the way,” he mentions quickly.
“No problem Tommy, I can explain the basics to you including the different types of therapy I offer and how the process works,” you reassure him. You explain to him the different services, how the equine therapy worked, walk in hours, session lengths and so on.
“I should probably mention that my brother ain’t keen on getting help and reaching out to others when he needs it, he’s too damn proud to acknowledge it, so he really doesn’t think he has any issues and thinks everything is fine… but he’s having a real tough time settlin’ down here. He’s so haunted by his past and he’s been acting differently lately, more temperamental, well, more than usual,” Tommy adds. You smile to yourself and nod, as you’ve had many clients before who were stuck in similar struggles and closed off to therapy initially.
“I can definitely understand that,” you sympathize with him. “It sounds like your brother has been through a lot and you just want him to get some support, which is great. Therapy isn’t for everybody but I have worked with many individuals like him who were going through similar situations, and they found great success.”
“That’s great to hear. That’s all I want for him is to get some help,” Tommy states.
“Now with that being said,” you continue, “therapy is voluntary, I cannot force someone to attend, but if your brother would agree to a consultation with me, I could chat with him more about where he is at, the kind of support he could benefit from and go from there. No pressure to commit to anything,” you propose to him.
“Hmm, I think he could be persuaded to try that, now that you mention it like that,” Tommy chuckles, sounding pleasantly surprised.
“Awesome! You can tell him to stop by the office any time and we can discuss it more. We’re open from 9-5,” you tell him, silently relieved that it was an indeed quick call. He thanks you and hangs up.
Something else akin to curiosity creeps into your mind as you recount what Tommy briefly told you about his brother. Maybe more so intrigue. You wonder how resistant he is to therapy, what happened in his past to hurt him so deeply, but you catch yourself before your thoughts run away from you further, either way you look forward to helping another person in need.
~~~~~~~~~~~
“Tommy, I swear to god if you bring up this damn therapy shit again, I won’t hesitate to shoot you next time we’re out on patrol,” Joel growled through clenched teeth, as he walked away from his brother into the kitchen of the house.
“Boy, it ain’t like I never heard that before,” Tommy quipped sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he followed Joel into the kitchen, pausing in the doorway as he leaned against the frame, hands shoved into his pockets. He observed his brother's rigid stance, the tightness in his shoulders, as Joel stood over the sink, looking out the window.
This felt like the umpteenth time that Tommy had broached the subject of Joel getting help and talking to a ‘shrink,’ as he dismissively described it, for the issues that he was struggling with. Joel was fine. He didn’t have any fucking issues. He was doing just fine and didn’t need some professional to scrutinize him, reduce him to his vices, and open old wounds from his past life. He was encouraged to go to grief counseling after Sarah died but by some grace of God, or whatever godforsaken omnipotent entity existed at that point, the outbreak occurred. Forget mental health, physical health and survival became the only focus.
Tommy exhaled softly. “Listen, I'm only suggestin’ it because I care about you. Ellie cares about you. You both have been through hell and back in the last year, I mean shit, we all have. But it seems like everything y’all went through is still affecting you, holding you back from letting your guard down and settling in here,” he states plainly, sadness lacing his tone.
“That’s bullshit Tommy and you know it,” Joel snaps, turning to face his younger brother and leaning back against the counter, arms crossed in defense. His gaze narrows. “I go out on patrol don’t I? Pick up extra shifts wherever it’s needed, help out with the contracting jobs, go out with Ellie in town.” Joel stood up taller, puffing out his chest, challenging his younger brother. Tommy shook his head, running his hand over his face with an exasperated expression. Heaven forbid Joel did anything for himself that did not involve contributing or providing for someone, period. He just couldn’t shake that from his identity, and it broke Tommy’s heart as he watched his brother’s stubborn pride, ridden with guilt and trauma, swallow him whole.
“Man when are you gonna fuckin’ do something for yourself Joel?!” Tommy asserted, his frustration reaching a boiling point. “Forget the damn commune, forget the community, forget Ellie for a sec and think about the last time YOU did something for yourself, the last time YOU reached out for help goddamnit.” He pushed off the doorframe and crossed the threshold of the kitchen as he strode towards Joel.
“You’re not on the run anymore brother. You don’t have to just survive. You can have a life here. You can sleep without keepin’ one eye open and relax without lookin’ over your shoulder. Don’t you want that? Don’t you think you deserve that?! Don’t you think you deserve this?!” Tommy said as he gestured around the cozy kitchen and fixed his older brother with a pleading stare.
Joel’s eyes widened as he tried to step back, the edge of the counter biting into his lower back as he took in Tommy’s weary face, the pain in his soft brown eyes, mirroring his own. His younger brother rarely raised his voice anymore. The outbreak took its toll on his hot headed temperament that never seemed to simmer down, even after he was discharged from the army. Joel knew that Tommy cared about him, hell he knew how deeply his brother loved him, after all they had respectively been through in the last twenty years, it had to be serious for him to raise his voice.
Joel opened his mouth, ready to bite back but his brother raised his hands in the air in surrender, “Look, this is the last time I will bring this up, I swear. But yesterday I called up the therapist in town who’s been helpin’ folks out, and asked her about the therapy process and she seems real nice, and supportive. She said you could come in for a consultation and talk to her and see if you’re interested,” Tommy said quietly.
Joel’s gaze narrows as he scrunches his eyebrows together in incredulity, “You-”
“I had nothing to lose Joel. Absolutely nothing. And neither do you,” Tommy cuts him off, raising his chin in defiance. “At least go talk to the therapist, if you don’t like her or you’re not feelin’ it, then I’ll drop it and let it go. Okay? The office is on the main street, just beside the clothing store, adjacent to the stables and they’re open everyday from 9-5.”
“Jesus fucking Christ Tommy,” Joel leaned back as he looked up at the ceiling, wishing it would collapse in on him. Gotta love that brotherly love.
“Look I should be getting back now, Maria will be waiting for me. Here’s the number and address for the business. I’ll see you around okay?” Tommy patted through his pockets and retrieved a small piece of paper with writing scribbled on it, placing it on the counter beside Joel. He gave him a last placating look before he walked out of the kitchen, the front door closing behind him with a soft click.
Joel pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled sharply before turning back around to look out the kitchen window. He hung his head in defeat, rounding his back as he rested his elbows on the counter and glared into his matte reflection in the sink. He didn’t need any help. He was doing fine. He’s still upright and breathing, with blood coursing through his veins isn’t he? Albeit, he's not jumping out of bed like a sprightly thirty year old anymore. His knees pop and crackle when he gets up from crouching over machinery for too long, his joints protest the next day when he pushes himself too far, moving slower than usual on job sites.
Hell, even his memory is starting to get cloudy around the edges. If it weren’t for Ellie some days, he’s sure he would leave the house without pants on, what with her always reminding him where things are in the house, special events that are coming up in the community that he forgets about. He had been a bit more snappy than usual, as Ellie so lovingly pointed out one day, but that’s nothing compared to his normal demeanour.
“You’re becoming a grumpy motherfucker y'know that? Jeez, who shit in your cornflakes this morning?” She grumbled at him with a mouth full of cereal, after he snapped at her reminder that it was parent day at the local school. Parent day, P.A. day, Joel hadn’t dealt with any of this shit in over twenty years since Sarah was in school. Even then he managed to swiftly neglect many of the parental events, seeing as Sarah was the perfect student, with nothing but glowing reviews from her teachers. The fact that Ellie was going to school amidst a fucking apocalypse was enough for Joel to be content.
But still, he’s doing fine, right? Just fine.
“Maybe talking to someone that’s not related to you would help you, y’know? Being able to talk about shit that you can’t talk to me, or Tommy, or anyone else about you know?” Ellie proposed to him later that night.
As luck would have it, she was already home when Joel and Tommy spoke in the kitchen and she had heard pretty much the entire conversation. And like Tommy, she only wanted Joel to get support because she cared about him.
“Think of all the shit that we went through in the past year, forget the infected, and the raiders, and FEDRA, and almost dying,” she casually listed off on one hand as if she was reciting a grocery list.
“There's so much shit that we’re both carrying with us, demons from our past, and it’s gotta come out one way or another. Look, therapists aren’t there to judge you, or analyze you,” she continued, “they’re kind of like a sounding board for you to bounce your thoughts off of, and they help you process shit you’re going through. You never know unless you try it,” she said matter of factly.
“Like Tommy said, you got nothing to lose man. Plus the whiskey and pills will only help you numb reality for so long, you’re gonna go insane eventually,” she said, fixing him with a knowing look as she leaned back into the couch beside him.
Joel just grunted in response and frowned. Damn this kid for being too insightful for her own good.
Ellie might be young but she most certainly wasn’t naive. And as much as Joel would have liked to assume that her easy transition into life in Jackson was on account of her youthfulness, it really wasn’t. It was just the fact that she had never known a normal life, as heartbreaking as that was. She never had the chance to experience such normalcy before everything turned on its head. But she developed friendships with a few of the other teens in the community, namely one girl Dina, who she hung out with after school, went to the movies and other community events with.
She didn’t have to actively try to fit into Jackson, she just did. Joel would never acknowledge the pangs of jealousy he felt gnawing at his insides when he saw her getting on so well, but it didn’t mean they chipped away at his morale any less.
Ellie smirked at his lack of response, knowing he was mulling it over in his mind. With the relationship they had developed over the past year, she was grateful to be able to talk to Joel and actually get through to him.
“Damn maybe I should be a fuckin’ therapist, that was good advice wasn’t it?” she grinned at him, elbowing him in his side.
Joel snorted and shook his head. “Christ, I must be losing my mind for real this time if you’ve got me considering it.”
“Now c’mon,” she wiggled her eyebrows at him, “you owe me at least a few games of Boggle for that pep talk,” she said triumphantly, holding up the weathered board game that was on the coffee table.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x therapist! reader#joel miller x you#joel miller smut#joel miller fanfiction#the last of us fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#joel miller#the last of us#tlou#the last of us hbo#equine assisted therapy#equine therapy
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Liveblog - Dofus, livre 1 : Julith [PART 24]
And it's the last thing he would have wanted her to do :(
Once again, want to draw your attention to the fact that Julith doesn't seem to really care about Joris. She just set him and Bakara free to get hit by lasers and once he told her "I will never allow this to happen" she stopped paying attention.
Like, did her love hinge on the condition he didn't disagree with her or what? I am insane about her various behaviours and weird way of loving (AKA she doesn't really love anyone besides Jahash, and she might not really love Joris that much either. because she's like. known him for a day and 80% of it he called her cringe(because she's cringe))
Man, I know ankama didn't think about this all so deeply. They were like "cool lasers go pew pew pew". But I'm the CEO of caring too much. So I will literally do just that.
Anyway, her parenting style (setting him loose under some deadly lasers) reminds me of Kerubim, except she's doing this on purpose. yaay.
Joris has GOT to be in a literal state of shock and dissociation by now. Not even years of therapy will fix this.
By now he's seen roughly 1000 and 6 people die.
I've seen headcanons of him keeping his mother's cape. And while imagining Joris with a cool cape is nice and all, I really doubt he Would Fucking Do That.
Not because you can get it as a cosmetic item in Dofus MMO (you can, but it's dubiously canon imo). I just think he fucking hates her and wouldn't want that thang in his house.
It's just him VS. her now.
There's a heaviness to this. All of them (save for maybe Lilotte) have the knowledge that whoever hits the Dofus will get exploded together with them. But with the rush of adrenaline, inexperience of everyone involved (only warriors actively think "oh I am going to DIE for real this time"), and the "if we don't act now 1000 people will die" of this situation, I really doubt either of them thought too hard about it all.
But I think that once you're all alone with that thought - and it's obvious that it's you, who will have to do it, it sinks in a little better.
He looks so distraught...
Inside me are two wolves: one of them is saying, "Joris is so brave yet so scared. He knows he will probably not survive this, and he's 10, and, and--" and the other says "JORIS JURGEN SUICIDAL HEROISM MOMENT NUMERO UNO!!!!!"
Both of them are equally insane.
I NEED these frames injected into my bloodstream.
One counterpoint I can think to why Julith is so worried about this despite setting him free to roam under the deadly lasers, is that, as the guardian of the Ebony Dofus, she could simply go "Not that one. let that one live. No, you can kill the blonde that looks like my husband, I don't give a shit about her. But the weird little boy? Don't kill him."
But this is just me trying to fix Ankama's fucky-wuckies with my imagination.
It's jojover. Just completely and irreparably jojover.
This scene always gives me chills, more so than any other insanely evil interaction between Joris and Julith.
There are a lot of ways this scene gets me (imagine me putting on the tinfoil hat from my Aux Tresors kerulou days. I am about to be that insane): The way she envelops him stops any and all movement of him and his Dofus completely, and wipes out all the sound and momentum.
He is completely helpless against how easily she stopped him and took his only way to save everyone from him.
As he falls to the ground, there's a little sense of dreaminess to it — the cape seems far bigger than it should be, the time before he hits the floor seems longer than it should be — and make no mistake, it is on purpose. Seconds before he falls we are shown the floor, and it seems vaguely closer to us at the first glance, than the distance he falls. It's unexpected, it's destabilizing.
It's like he is dissociating, from the horror of not being able to do this.
It's like a nightmare.
And after doing this irreparable evil, and taking his one way of stopping this evil, she looks at him as if he is a tiny, stupid little thing, that doesn't know what it is doing.
As if it's not her fault that his only choice is doing something that will kill him, just to stop her.
And listen. There's guilt too. Because Joris is the one who allowed her to get the Ebony Dofus back. If he survives this and nobody else does, do you think he could ever forgive himself?
She's making him responsible for this.
They will never get to speak, but Jahash is happy, with what Joris has tried to do.
...Unlike Julith, who was reminded of Jahash by Joris's blue eyes, — I bet Jahash thinks they're similar to Bakara's.
There are so many emotions here. He will never get to speak to this man. This man is happy abotu what Joris has done. This man is the reason Joris's life is utterly ruined.
Is Jahash's smile an "I'm sorry that you have to do this, and see this," or "I'm proud of you," or "I wish things were different," or a mixture of all of them?
Joris will never get to know.
He saw something in her that other people didn't see.
She never really wanted to be a "butcher". Even if she could not overpower that destiny, — after Bonta took away her entire family and future, may I add, — the fact that she tried to begin with is saying a lot.
The look he gives her is something between "please don't prove me wrong" and "this isn't you".
I think she realizes now that there is no future where she, Jahash, and Joris are together and happy.
Four lives, in three generations of this family, ruined and uprooted and destroyed, because of some petty politics that were happening behind their backs.
I truly despise Bonta.
It's quiet. The only sound is his own heartbeat. Nothing seems quite real. He can barely believe that maybe she will stop this madness herself.
There is only one kind of reunion that they may have.
No matter how much she wanted a happier ending.
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GOM Headcanon
Kise
He has very dry skin. He follows his skin care religiously
He has both a huge prize AND degredation kink.
Every thursday he goes to Caribbean dances and has a regular partner for the bachata
He got a degree in something with fashion and marketing. Still working as a model and influencer during the college years.
After he goes works with his sisters in their fashion company
He and Midorima fucked few times between the Teiko and the High school
He's a little bit of a whore (especially at the club half drunk)
Absolutely adores to give orals. Yes let me suck you off sir please
Very good at it
Had a huge crush for Aomine during Teiko, but nothing happened
His romantic relationship never last long (monogamy problem)
He is poly
Feels trapped in a monogamous relationship
Very closed to his sister in the adult age
Vegetarian (vegan at home)
Has a little tattoo for each miracles (like a frog for Midorima, a cherry flower for Momoi..)
Akashi
Lactose intollerant
Aroace King (kise told him about ace people and Midorima confirmed the existence)
Degree in philosophy
Sojio professional player just for saying he has a job (not really need one)
After the winter cup he had pretty bad episodes of depression and eaten alive from his guilt.
But with the power of friendship (Mibuchi had called the miracles for and intervention) and therapy he got better
He would need a heavy session of consensual BDSM (he subs)
He and his dad ignore each other basically
Didn't took well the death of his horse, and after that doesn't want any more pets
He and Midorima suggest books each other
Doesn't drink, but can handle alcool pretty good
He play golf with the mother side of the family
Totally an addicted to
Only the Gom knows that he was diagnoed DID (dissocative identity disorder)
He would be a perfect menwife
Doesn't like to drive
Midorima
Doctor bccouse his daddy told him to
He and Takao got married at some point
His best man was Akashi
His dad was kind of homophobic, but had a change of heart
For each birthday he does the the natal chart of all the Gom + takao and Kagami
Can't hendle alcool (no at all, like half beer and he is WASTED)
Takao is an architect and he designed their house
Doesn't talk before his coffe
Morning person (after the coffe), Takao is not
Still listen to the oroscop every morning and brings the luck item (Takao is forced to have his too)
Has a thing for dirt talk (Takao doesn't complaint)
Still play piano and composes song for Takao
Would like to have a kid or two
Rei Ryugazaki (from free!) are cousins
Every sunday the have a lunch with the over miracles in their home
Aomine
His career in the NBA (because yes he entred) has benn pretty short for injuries
so he come back in Japan and makes the delivery for the flower/ plant shop of Sakurai.
in the US he and kagami lived togher, but they were in diffrent teams
He adoped a dog he found on the side of a road
Really like beers of all kind and flavors
Decent cook
He and Kuroko fucked everywhere in Teiko. But like everywhere, not corridor, bathroom, storege room or class was safe (they enjoyed)
He and Kagami had drunk and angry sex in the US times
Prefers women (boobs)
As an adult he went to therapy and understood what was wrong during the last years in middle school (depression time)
He and Momoi are big fan of horror movies
Very warm person
Can't stand gloves
Kuroko
Cold hands
He and Kagami moved in together, but neither of them belives in marriege
Kuroko would love a cat, but Kagami is allergic
He works in a kindergarten
and come home full of drawings of the kids
Doesn't want to have children though
Exhibitionist kink
Having sex is a park in the middle of the night
Kagami usually cooks and he drives
Brings his kindle everywhere with him
He smokes a little (like two or three cigarette per day)
Murasakibara
Chronic back pain and at the joint because he grew up too fast
Acne and bad skin in general because he eats to much chocolate and sweets in general
Became a pastry chef
He, Himuro and Kagami opened a nice coffe shop
The type with cultural events, book crossing and stuff
Doesn't really like having sex. He finds it really tiring
He and Himuro have an open relationship
Ass eater king. Not a big fan of penetrative sex because he dosent't want to hurt Himuro with his huge cock.
Has a little aquarium and adores stares at the fish
Can't swim
He got diabetes at some point
Momoi
She got a degree in statistic and after a very high paid job
When Baribe went out, she and Kise went all pink
In her highshool years she did something with some girls, but she found it pretty wet. Prefers small and cute boys
Seirously considering breast reduction surgey
She and Sakurai are together
They have an adorable little dog
When Aomine was in US they used to videocall every fucking day
She and Kise are the queens of gossip
Never had smth physical with Kuroko
Very good at videgames (had a youtube chanal)
especially the shooting ones
Wears high heels at work
Adores cherry
Allergic to something stupid like kiwi or apple
During college she made a lot of female friends
Pretty dominant in bed
Good at drawing
#kuroko no basket#knb#gom#knb headcanon#gom headcanon#kise ryōta#akashi seijuro#headcanon akashi#kise headcanon#takao x midorima#midorima headcanon#midorima shintarou#aomine × kagami#aomine daiki#aomine headcanon#aomine x kuroko#kuroko tetsuya#kuroko headcanon#kuroko x kagami#they are so cute#momoi satsuki#momoi headcanon#akashi needs therapy#murasakibara atsushi#himuro x murasakibara
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In thisisnotawebsite.com, bills fears are stated as "venetial blinds, 3d glasses, TV statics" do you have any theories or hcs for any of this? I loved your analysis of billford and bill in general so I'm pretty curious!!
Oh, that's a great question and I would be more than happy to brainstorm a little about those fears! Of course, everything I write is the result of my personal interpretations, so you and everyone else are free to add more :D
But before talking about Bill's fears, I would like to point out two things:
1. The apparently weird and random nature of these fears
Blinds, glasses, and TV static? I doubt anyone would've ever imagined them as Bill's fears.
However, their seemingly innocuous nature works great for a being like him. Bill isn't a normal human being - or another generic 3D being: he comes from a completely different dimension and he has powers beyond our imagination. He sees and experiences the world in a totally different way compared to us. So having apparently random elements as his fears emphasizes how different and "detached" his nature is from us even more.
2. The conceptual weight of these fears
I doubt Bill fears these things for what they are. Like, if someone gives him a physical pair of 3D glasses, I doubt he would run away screaming.
It's not the object per se that scares him. It's what the object implies or represents that scares him. And, again, we should take into consideration that he's a 2D being and experiences reality differently. So maybe what for us is normal, for him is a much more powerful representation of something else.
_______________
Said that, let me explain what I think these fears represent for Bill and why he fears them:
Venetian blinds
Venetian blinds are thin, horizontal strips of wood/plastic that can be moved to change the amount of light coming through a window.
When they are down, they look like a thin, flat surface. They're so smooth, they don't let any light pass through. They almost look like one, single, uneven surface.
Maybe, to Bill's eye, this flat, thin surface reminds him of the flat, thin surface of his own world. Maybe Euclydia was as flat and smooth as a blind. And when the blinds are down, they remind him of the flat nature of his world.
But Venetian blinds can also be moved: they can be tilted, to let the light pass through the slits, or raised completely.
The act of tilting and/or raising the blinds might remind Bill of the destruction of his dimension. From his perspective, he sees a once smooth surface move, break and suddenly the light shines through - a light that could remind him of all the stars he always watched.
So every time he sees blinds being adjusted, he sees a tragedy being reenacted: a world that breaks/gets destroyed and the light of stars passing through its fragments.
3D glasses
As we know from the art therapy note on thisisnotawebsite.com, Bill draws red and blue triangles. And we all associated red and blue with his parents, thus guessing those were their colors.
3D glasses are made of a red lens and a blue lens. One lens filters out all the red in the 2D image we're watching, the other lens filters out all the blue: as a result, our brains put together the resulting two images processed through our eyes and we can see in 3D.
But if we consider this mechanism through Bill's point of view, the mechanism behind 3D glasses implies that only by filtering out blue and red (aka the color of his parents), you can see the third dimension. Only by removing red and blue, you can see in 3D. Only by removing his parents, he could see in 3D.
These glasses could be a dark confirmation, for him: your parents had to die, for you to finally see the third dimension. They had to die. And they died. And they constantly die, every time their colors are removed. Because only if they die, you can see further. It's a bit like killing them over and over.
And maybe, this is also cruel irony for him. Because 3D glasses need his parents' color to work. His parents, who never saw nor understood the third dimension, are a means to allow a 3D vision of 2D things. Only by using (and killing) them, others can see in 3D. Maybe that's too cruel, even for Bill.
TV static
Bill said that, every time he tries to talk about the destruction of Euclydia, he blacks out and doesn't remember anything. Every time he blacks out (like in TBOB), it is shown through static very similar to the TV static he's so scared about.
In the past, I supposed that the static and Bill's blackout were a way to hint that Bill actually died in the destruction of Euclydia - that's why he cannot remember exactly what happened and blacks out every time he tries to.
Therefore the TV static might be a reminder of his own death. Of what he experienced, right after his world died and everyone else along with it.
This would also reconnect TV static with all other fears, because being afraid of the first time he died, implies the destruction of his place, the death of his parents and his own terrible mistake that caused all of that. It could be a terrible reminder of his own mortality and his past sin - both things Bill isn't able to deal with (not after eons in therapy, at least).
#gravity falls#ask#bill cipher#the book of bill#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#euclydia#euclid cipher#scalene cipher#great question thank you a lot!#good brainstorming
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2024 Creator Reveals
We’ve reached the end of the exchange and that means it’s time to reveal the creators of all our works.
Thank you for putting so much love and effort into Stony Loves Steve 2024, you really made it a great experience. We hope everyone loved it as much as we did!
Giftees, be sure to leave a comment and kudos on your gift if you haven’t already. All our creators worked hard to make this event a success, so show them some love.
You can now post your work publicly outside of the exchange. Tag it as #stonylovessteve2024 on tumblr and we’ll reblog you. @ us @stonylovessteve on twitter and we’ll retweet you.
Below the cut is the final list of all the works produced for the exchange and the creators.
Still Halfway Human, Just Going Through It by Becci_chan for soliloquent (MCU, 9.9k Words)
Stark Industries was still an incredible place to work. Everyone seemed so dedicated and smart and ambitious, it truly reminded him of Howard and his vision for the future. Steve had even seen Tony Stark a few times in passing or when he made his rounds and talked to Steve’s superior in the office, but he hadn’t talked to him more than a greeting in passing. He wasn’t even sure Tony, who insisted on being called by his first name, had actually noticed him during these times. Steve had noticed him all the more.
Give me the luxuries of life by BladeoftheNebula for Thahire (MCU, 4.9k Words)
Four times Steve reluctantly dabbles in a little luxury + one time he leans into it wholeheartedly
Hot Bouncer by Infinitywrites for Becci_chan (MCU, 2.7k Words)
‘Hey Steve, We had a very interesting last night. Love to stay and elaborate on that but have to take my playful pet baby – Toothless for a run. Left some hangover cure you might need. Feel free to use the shower or anything else you need. Be back soon. T.S”
The Long Game by betheflame for waywardmillennial (MCU, 2.6k Words)
Steve prided himself on being a patient man, he really did. He had stared down Nazis, and HYDRA officers, and the British Press on that one horrible media tour. He could spend hours plotting strategies for situations which may never happen but might, and he had been known to accompany Pepper on her stress-relief shopping trips. Steve could hold his tongue. Steve could outmaneuver his opponent. Steve could play the long game. That last donut broke all of that.
not a lot, just forever by Thahire for AirlocksandAviaries (MCU, 2.7k Words)
A few months after the Battle of New York, Tony invites Steve over to see the apartment he has built for him. Steve, of course, is totally normal about this and not panicking at all.
give me your number (i’ll give you mine) by ishipallthings for BladeoftheNebula (MCU, 1.2k Words)
Somehow, Tony freaking Stark showing up at the store isn’t Clint’s biggest shock of the day.
Cap’s Comics by sadieb798 for robertdowneyjjr (AA, Comic)
The local newspaper/magazine/online publication runs a comic about the Avengers — from thwarted robberies to statues come to life, they are sort of like funny little recaps of the team’s latest missions that New Yorkers have witnessed. Then the comics start becoming more… domestic, showing the Avengers at home during game nights and weekend brunch. There are even a few where Cap and Iron Man go on a date together. The team comes across these comics and no one realizes Steve’s the artist. After all, the drawings are barely better than stick figures, and Steve’s art is much more refined than that… right?
i live in a city that lives in a different age by soliloquent for ohjustpeachy (MCU, 10.8k Words)
Steve Rogers has fourteen days to complete fourteen therapy homework assignments.
Five Times Steve Woke Up Early (And One Time He Didn’t) by AirlocksandAviaries for ABrighterDarkness (MCU, 8.3k Words)
Steve’s not actually a morning person, despite his body’s insistence. It’s quite possibly the one thing about the serum he’s not immensely grateful for. Forcing himself up and on a run to burn through the overwhelming, restless energy that builds bright and early would be much more tolerable if it were a few hours later. Tony decides to do something about this.
Steve is a (Wonderful) Person But A Terrible Patient by Neverever for sadieb798 (MCU, 3.5k Words)
Tony is assigned a new patient, Steve Rogers, who has a lot of medical issues and Tony is ready to help. But he finds he has something to learn from Steve.
Come With Me by ChocolateCapCookie for meidui (MCU, 3.4k Words)
“Do you have any plans for the weekend?” asked Tony. “Besides trying to volunteer at every charity in New York, of course.” Or the one in which Tony isn’t sure if Steve is a stalker or just a really, really good guy.
I surrender to you(only you) by captainstars for AvengersNewB (MCU, 1.6k Words)
He doesn’t know if the first time is a mistake. The phone rings. The sound is so unnatural that Steve almost doesn’t answer it. And then he scrambles for it, but the finger that presses on the answer button is still impossibly gentle. ‘Steve,’ Tony mumbles. Steve squeezes his eyes shut. It’s late in the night, but no one in the compound sleeps. It’s quiet nevertheless, and for a moment the only response Tony gets is Steve’s rasping breaths as he tries to gather what is left of himself.
Courting the Old Fashioned Way by zappedbysnow for Infinitywrites (AU, Art)
There’s a new mechanic in town. He bought a small ranch and fixes cars on the side. Steve is just being neighborly, welcoming him with some pie. It has nothing to do with the guy being cute. Nope. Not at all.
in the laundry room by wingheads for captainstars (616, Art)
steve isn’t so much ashamed by getting caught holding tony’s underwear in his hand as he is aroused by catching tony secretly wearing his jacket.
my curse is that I bill by the hour by picturecat for Fluffypanda (MCU, 5.5k)
Steve Rogers, the 21st century, and his no-good, really awful, legitimately-cursed first week in it.
(you look so lovely) running through my head by robertdowneyjjr for tinystark616 (MCU, 5.9k)
All his life, Steve has dreamed of a gorgeous brown-eyed brunet genius who’s too smart for everyone around him. Everything points to these being soulmate dreams, but that doesn’t make any damn sense when it seems like Tony’s in some far off future and Steve is just trying to get through a life of illness and poverty in 1930’s Brooklyn. Against all odds, they meet anyway.
In the Depths by waywardmillennial for WikketKrikket (MCU, 5.1k)
Prompt: Steve gets pranked on national TV as part of a charity TV fundraiser. It’s embarrassing, and leaves him feeling shaken in a way he didn’t anticipate. But it was for a good cause. So he’s fine with it. Really.
you’ve really missed a trick when it comes to love by meidui for ChocolateCapCookie (MCU, 2.3k)
Steve thinks he’s happier than he’s ever been, or at least he should be. This is the closest he’s ever come to having everybody he loves in one place and the Compound doesn’t echo with emptiness anymore, and he’s seen more of Tony in the past few months than he has in the last seven years. He’s still getting used to being with Tony again, this softer, older version of him, and how difficult that makes keeping his hands to himself because all he wants to do is touch him.
good enough for you by tinystark616 for Neverever (MCU, 4.6k)
Steve is having self-esteem issues because he feels like he isn’t good in bed. Tony finds out and decides to do something about it.
All I Need by VenomousSoliloquy for purpleicedteas (MCU, Art)
Sometimes Steve finds himself lost in doubt. Tony always knows exactly what he needs.
Summer Whispers by ABrighterDarkness for starksnack (MCU, Art)
Tags include ‘horseback riding’ but there is no provided summary.
my plus one has a plus four by starksnack for zappedbysnow (MCU, 7k)
five first date attempts + one first date
Magnum Opus by FrankTheSnek for wingheads (MCU, 6.3k)
Magnum opus (noun): a great work; a large and important work of art, music, or literature, especially one regarded as the most important work of an artist or writer. Steve does not believe in true mates, they are just an old wives’ tale. The man he has been dreaming of and turned into his greatest masterpiece is just an imagined muse and nothing more… Right?
Now and Then by Wikketkrikket for picturecat (3490, 10.6k)
Things haven’t been right between Steve and Natasha since she got back from a business trip overseas. How did things go so wrong, and can Steve make them right again? Also; they’re trapped in a basement.
Just Right by AvengersNewB for LadyGigi (MCU, 2.3k)
Omega Steve wears sexy lingerie, even though he’s deeply insecure about the way he looks in it. Alpha Tony is there to show him how perfect he is; wearing the lingerie and in general.
I’m on fire, but I’m trying not to show it by Fluffypanda for FrankTheSnek (MCU, 2.3k)
Steve misses being an omega. Tony helps him out with that.
Wish You Were Here by One and Five Nines for ishipallthings (MCU, 1.8k)
Steve starts sending Tony postcards
[Comic] Man Out of Time, Fish Out of Water (Prologue) by LadyGigi for VenomousSoliloquy (MCU, comic)
Mermaid Steve is swimming to the ocean surface with a bag full with human trinkets for his friend, Sam, to demystify when he comes across a red comet in the sky- at least that is what it looks like until it flies over him, revealing its humanlike form, and crashes into the water near the human island. Steve must decide if he will heed the warnings of his kind or investigate this once in a lifetime occurrence.
#steve rogers#stonylovessteve2024#stonylovessteve#steve/tony#stevetony#superhusbands#marvel events#exchange
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RAHHHHH CANNIBAL WALLEYE WALLEYE CANNIBAL YOU NEVER MISSSSS JUMPING OFF THE WALLLSSSS
Just got the chance to finish chapter 9 and i will cryyyyyy. Impulse :( Skizz caring about Impulse :( they're all so stupid :( I can't wait till I have time to draw RAHHH
I have a feeling this is going to be one of the chapters that really stick with me. Aside from the WONDERFUL writing, and the AMAZING portrayal of emotions, I can, unfortunately, really connect and sympathize with Impulse this chapter lol
Obviously not to go too into detail or start venting or anything, today has been A LOT. had to get up earlier than i can properly function, go to physical therapy, just got back from a saline infusion,
(Trigger warning: needles, and slight medical errors. feel free to skip lol Tylically the place i go to for infusions are quick and easy, but today they didnt fail once, but TWICE. blew two veins, and when they finally got everything said and done, the needle hurt like HELL going in, when usually i can't feel it)
and I STILL have another appointment I need to go to later today. On top of all that I also have to fit in schoolwork. Definitely feels like stuff that doesn't normally bother me is building up, and FAST, I can only imagine what Impulse is feeling. Actually, not true, I can READ it lol. (And it will never fail to make me Feel™ what they are Feeling™)
Once again, everything is so very wonderfully written it's insane. Despite being similar to what I'm currently feeling, it still felt like an escape rather than adding to the stress, yknow? Which, personally, as someone who struggles with writing in general. Is just plain insane to me.
Also the shower scene. Beautifully written. You can practically feel the tension melting off of Impulse before his thoughts start getting a bit too much. Very relatable. Very cozy with the perfect amount of oomph. I want Skizz to hug him and tell him it's going to be okay so bad I could rival the sun in intensity. Like. Cannibal. Cannibal please. Let them be happy. (Make it last. I want to see them suffer.) I want to draw them being happy together (i want to draw them being sad together. They should be miserable a bit longer. As a treat.)
Don't want this to go on for too long, because I feel like it's already longer than it probably should be, even if I could ramble for hours. But I just wanted to say that this chapter made me especially happy :] (also im surprised Skizz didn't know he was a demon. Hmm. The thoughts are brewing lol.)
Last but not least, do you mind being called just "cannibal?" Because personally, I find it very silly, but if it bothers you at all I can just. Not, lol. <3 (Also feel free not to answer this if its too long or makes you uncomfortable in any way, I definitely rambled about my day way more than I intended. Whoops.)
hehehe I know >:3 (I'm gonna answer this with a paragraph for each of ur paragraphs btw)
Cry. Do it. I dare you to. They ARE so silly and sad and also so so caring for each other <3 <3 ((also if u drew something i would love u forever haha))
I'm so pleased to hear that you think it's going to stick with you! That's actually such an honor, you're making me blush ^///^ But yeah, I think we're all relating to Impulse this chapter, which is honestly rather unfortunate. But hey! At least I'm hitting home 🙃
I don't mind venting!! Vent away <3 Also I feel that, getting up earlier than it feels you can function. Had that last semester, fortunately I have no 8 ams this time around.
I'm so sorry to hear that D: I hope you're all recovered by the time I answer this <3 I had a similar thing years ago, where I injured myself and they had to draw blood and just couldn't get the needle right. I think they tried 5 times on both arms. Somehow, I'm not afraid of needles after that, but I totally get what you're experiencing and wish you all the best *throws infinite hearts at you*
It really is just an endless cycle sometimes, huh? The little things can pile up quickly if you're not careful about noticing and taking care of yourself. I hope you got to take a warm shower, or do something comforting to you afterwards. My go-to is a mug of hot chocolate :] (and speaking of, I actually just had one lol)
Thank you thank you thank you!!! I'm glad it felt like an escape. I find it difficult to read works that are bleak or overly miserable, so I'm happy to hear that it wasn't just sad for you, that it helped with your own experiences. Something something comfort in solidarity and shared suffering
Yeah the shower scene :))) Fun fact: I came up with the idea while in the shower. It's so distracting at first when there's something to do, what with washing up n such. And then, there's that period where it's so comfortable, but purposeless, and that's where the thoughts get you. At least for me, and thus Impulse. But mostly, a very very safe space where things don't feel quite so oppressive. And the Skizz hugs, I'm sure they're coming one day ;) ((also the "I want to see them suffer" is far too true for me lmao. make it ANGSTY)) Again, if you draw, I will give u a real life kiss and make you a cinnamon roll. You deserve to draw them, as a treat. ((YES DRAW THEM SAD >:D the misery makes the relief all the sweeter at the end))
I don't mind long asks! And I ESPECIALLY don't mind rambling about my story. I live off that stuff, yes please. Genuinely makes my day, reading comments and seeing these extra reactions :)))) If you want to ramble, always feel free to send in an ask, or even message me directly! I won't bite you (I only bite Skizz), and I'm always happy to have someone to ramble about skizzpulse with (So, if you have thoughts brewing about Skizz not knowing he was a demon, you're invited to send them my way)
You can call me Walleye! Cannibal just describes my feelings on Imp and Skizz, you know? And yeah, Cannibal does feel like a silly name, so hopefully Walleye feels a little less silly
Thank you so so sosoSOOSOSOSOSO much for the ask, I can't even begin to explain how happy this makes me. Hopy you're feeling better! Drink water, get some rest, take care of yourself!! <3
Walleye out o7
#walleye asks#this side of the screen#skizzleman#impulsesv#hermitcraft#ao3 fanfic#skizzpulse#<- technically ig?
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"do NOT ask me about ggy or patient 46 because i WILL begin ranting"
You see, I am incapable of ever listening to anyone, ever, so I must ask about GGY and patient 46
I have absolutely no knowledge of modern FNaF lore; I have not read any of the books (something I plan to fix whenever my bank account stops bleeding) so you're gonna have to do some heavy lifting here and tell me all about it
Ooh boy rubs my hands together
okay so im gonna start with ggy because i love Tony and Ellis. (i dont have the book in front of me tho so this isnt gonna be 100% every detail)
GGY is about a kid named Tony Becker who has an assignment in his 6th grade english class. He has to write a fictional mystery with side plots that tie into the main plot. He chooses to do this with his two friends. They use pen names whenever they do their english projects together (sobs and wails and cries into my hands) and Tony picked Tarbell, and his friends were Boots and Dr. Rabbit (or Rab for short).
Tony wants to start working on their project, but Boots and Rab want to go to the fazcade. Tony gives in when rab backs up boots (tony sees boots as immature and worries about outgrowing him and hanging out more with rab) tony wanders around the fazcade trying to find inspo, and then notices someone named GGY with top scores on some of the games. when he asks other people about it, they tell him the scores are seemingly impossible, but when he asks a staff member, he's told they haven't been hacked.
At some point he makes an online blog to ask about it and a girl he'd talked to in the fazcade asks him to meet her. she tells him that she thinks this is more than just high scores, and that he should stay out of it.
Oh also freddy keeps watching tony and at some point begins following him.
Tony finds out that GGY has a hacked party pass (or it was like a fun pass or smth) that gives them access to much more than it should, working almost like a security card.
Tony then finds out one of the school counselors has gone missing, and he sneaks into the librarian's office to learn more about it. he finds out two other counselors have also gone missing, all of them having gone to the pizzaplex before disappearing.
tony writes his paper and gives it to Rab and Boots to look over, and when they come back the next day, they've changed it into a fantasy story. And GGY is labled as the wizard's favorite apprentice, rather than someone getting high scores on arcade games.
tony is upset with rab and boots and begins calling htem by their actual names.
Rab is Greg, Boots is Ellis.
tony is also in trouble for sneaking into the librarian's office and using her laptop, so he has detention shelving books.
Greg come and offers to take him to the pizzaplex when he's done, and it's kind of implied he killed him there.
again i have bad memory and i dont have the book in front of my so anyone can feel free to correct anythign i got wrong or missed
now onto patient 46 who's from the therapy tapes in sb.
this'll be undeniably easier because i can just listen to the tapes. patient 46 is also not confirmed to be gregory, its just a theory, so im just gonna call them 46.
its important to note that 46 does not speak.
everything here is things implied to have been nonverbally communicated to the therapist.
Tape 2:
It starts with the therapist talking about how the day is nice, but 46 doesnt like the light, so the therapist draws the blinds. she then comments on how 46 is not talking to her today, and says that she gets reviews from patients, and when 46 doesn't let her help them, she gets bad reviews. she tells 46 she could get in trouble and get put in timeout, which 46 finds funny.
Tape 4:
New therapist is here, she asks if 46 is going to talk to her, and they dont reply. she asks whats wrong, and they gesture to the flowers. the therapist comments on them being particularly fragrant and moves them. The therapist then comments on 46 staring at something, and says they're "amazingly alert." she says shed like to have 46 tell her about themself, but 46 does not. the therapist instead chooses to look through their notes. she also comments on the chair not fitting 46, but its not specified if its too big or too small. she then asks if 46 is bothered by a new therapist, but 46 doesnt seem surprised or confused at all. the therapist says shes surprised by whats in 46's notes. she says they have a "rebellious side" and a knack for computers, and explains the word phenom to them. the tape ends with her asking if 46 considers themself a hacker
tape 6:
new therapise again! she tells 46 shes already read their files and knows what theyve worked on. 46 asks for a candy, and she gives one to them, taking one for herself as well. she says she wants to start with 46's parents, and claims it was tragic but she doesnt think 46 has processed it emotionally. she says they wrote it like they had read it off of a book. (her exact words are they wrote an objective rather than a subjective narrative, but 46 didnt know what that meant.) she says 46 spends a lot of time alone and is good at self-dialogue, which she explains is "asking urself questions and getting answers" she tells them to try asking themself how they feel about what happened to them. she tells them to let themself be upset about it so they can let it go.
tape 8:
same therapist as 6! she asks 46 if theyve thought about what they talked about. 46 had told them their past had made them sad and scared. the therapist asks if they had written down exactly what made them feel that way. she then says she works with many people who respond to tragedy differently. she asks 46 if their fantasies would be different had this tragedy not happened to them.
Tape 13:
new therapist again! she says when shes getting to know a client, she likes to find out abt their hobbies. when she doesnt get a reply, she asks if they like sports. 46 tells her they like to watch sports, but not play them. and that they like to stay inside. the therapist then reluctantly tells 46 that their previous therapists have gone missing. except one who was found dead, and they said her body looked to be mangled by machinery. the therapist also comments that 46 doesn't look concerned about it. she jokes about watching her back, which 46 finds funny.
Tape 14:
same therapist as 13. she asks if 46 knows about the pizzaplex, and says the technicians who work there know them. theyve seen what they think is 46 on the security cameras. they say 46 was accused of hacking their systems. the therapist says that the hacks are causing tons of problems, but that there's no solid proof it was 46, and 46 finds it funny that the techs are having issues. she says she finds it weird that 46 would spend time in such a busy, crowded place despite their loner attitude. she asks if its the electronics that 46 likes. she also says theyve designed programs that talk to them and repeat phrases. she says it asks them questions and prompts for responses, like their own little therapist. she said at first she had thought they were talking to themself, but it seems more like they were talking to someone else. she asks who it was.
Tape 15:
same therapist as 13+14. she starts with asking if 46 wants to do an ink blot test. she shows them an image, and 46 asks to hold it. 46 says it reminds them of a mask. the therapist asks if 46 likes the idea of being disguised, and how they make you invisible. she says being invisible lets you get away with anything, and asks 46 if they like that idea. she then moves on to something else, telling 46 that it seems theyve been talking to someone else. she says the techs think that its someone trying to lure 46 away, or manipulate them. the therapist moves to where she can see 46's eyes, and says she got something different from the communications. she accuses 46 of manipulating someone, rather than being manipulated. she says they were recorded on the security cameras with someone else. she says that it looks like the person theyre with has rabbit ears, which 46 finds amusing.
Tape 16:
Same therapist as 13+14+15. she says shes gotten another message from the pizzaplex that says that theres a glitch in the system that makes the animatronics more eerie than entertaining. she says the glitch spread system-wide and infected all the machines. she also says it was traced back to 46. she says the glitch broadcasted a dangerous message. she also says that when the techs were trying to fix it, the source shifted. she says that the glitch changed from a glitch and became a set of sub-routines that were made to do exactly what the glitch was doing. (which basically means it stopped just being a glitch and became part of the system?? i think?? idk shit abt computers bruh) when 46 does not reply, she presses, saying she is on their side and wont tell anyone what is told to her during the session and that the techs have no proof it was 46, so theyre not in trouble. when 46 doesnt reply still, she brings up their past. 46 refuses to look at her, but she continues. she says it doesnt matter if they look at the floor, because nothing they told her about their parents was true. she says they had great parents, and a great childhood. she asks 46 why they lied, and tells them to look at her. she then says she understands why 46 would be upset about the confrontation, and says they can come back to this another day. the last line she says is "you're shaking your head like that's not going to happen."
UHM YEAH IM NORMAL ABOUT THEM LOL.
i have a lot of thoughts on both of these parts and i personally believe 46 is Gregory. but if i dumped all my thoughts we'd be here all day so have this long ass explanation instead
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