#draco facts

[flovoid]

AYYY THANKS FOR THE TAG @living-undead !!!

OC QUESTIONNAIRE

NAME

Draco Almond

NICKNAME

dear draco (obviously we know who says that), dobby (a nickname from high school..), little almond this one was the reason he changed his last name to almond tho~ hehe some lore

GENDER

male (he/him)

HEIGHT

174cm (5'8")

NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY

originally from cooperdale, now lives in san myshuno

FAVORITE FRUIT

N/A

FAVORITE SEASON

winter (so he can wear hoodies all the timee)

FAVORITE FLOWER

…he used to love roses 🥀

FAVORITE SCENT

clove cigarettes, fresh breads, and the smell of paper

COFFEE, TEA OR HOT CHOCOLATE?

he is a hot-chocolate guy not surprising

AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP

3-4 hours a day— draco struggles to sleep honestly especially more after becoming a detective (he does take unplanned afternoon naps tho)

DOGS OR CATS?

he leans towards cats a bit

DREAM TRIP

he never had one unfortunately. but if he had to choose; then a quiet place for sure (granite falls)

NUMBER OF BLANKETS

he has two silks blankets: one that is underneath him and the other is above him bro sure loves to dive his body in huh

RANDOM FACT

draco is the type of person that would be standing-staring at someone with zero smile whenever he wants something from them. he literally doesn’t initiate a word so others find it weird his colleagues finds it scary-

TAGGING

@cosmicsimsi @elksun @yukikocloud @youredreamingofroo @sertrallne @simminginstars @acuar-io @vicciouxs @orbitsuns @rebouks @scuumbag05 @wildmelon @circusjuney @alientown @bouncytrait @lilamausmaus @butteredfrogs

[iamnmbr3]

Draco in second year like: Did you hear? Ginny Weasley fancies Harry Potter. How embarrassing. Can you imagine? Can you imagine someone being attracted to Harry Potter? I couldn't. I mean what's he got besides his stupid scar and his stupid hair and his stupid green eyes and his Seeker skills and his heroics?

Can you believe someone is actually attracted to that? I can't. It must be so embarrassing for her friends. Imagine having to put up with that. Imagine if someone just talked about Harry Potter all the time. It would drive me mad.

The entirety of Slytherin House: ...........

[zlarirosa]

they're official

[redhoodie1723]

“Harry, however, had never been less interested in Quidditch; he was rapidly becoming obsessed with Draco Malfoy.”

I just KNOW HBP Ron was SICK and TIRED of Harry

[blorger]

I call this meeting of the Hagrid Haters Society to order. I move that, as part of today's agenda, we discuss just how much he sucks. In order to facilitate this, I have prepared the following

ULTIMATE ANTI-HAGRID MANIFESTO

HAGRID AS DESCRIBED IN THE BOOKS

Rubeus Hagrid, keeper of the keys and grounds at Hogwarts and also occasional Care of Magical Creatures teacher, is introduced to us thusly:

Hagrid's character is mostly a beat-by-beat rehash of the "gentle giant" archetype; as per TV Tropes :

He's big, muscular, and angry-looking. He might even be an actual monster. People are often fearful of him. But he's got a heart of gold. He loves children and puppies and frequently abhors unnecessary violence. He is often rather intelligent, level-headed, and analytical, a voice of reason in the group. He probably has a few unexpected hobbies. He's the Gentle Giant. However, when push comes to shove, he's great to have on your side in battle.

Hagrid appears beastly but also IS beastly, both literally (he is a half-giant) and figuratively: He lives in a wooden hut* at the edge of the Forbidden Forest, his possessions are "very dirty", his best suit is hairy and brown. The things he builds are ragged and haphazardly put together (he makes himself a mourning armband for Aragog's funeral that is just "a rag dipped in boot polish", the flute he gifts to Harry in PS is "roughly cut" and "obviously" hand made) and, similarly, Hagrid's food is dubious at best: his beef casserole has a large talon in it, his rock cakes are notoriously inedible and his toffee needs to be softened by an open fire in order for it to be edible.

Interestingly, though jkr goes to great lengths to point out that Hagrid is a giant with a heart of gold, she still wants us to know that he's capable of great violence:

(from OoTP)

Hagrid is resisting an unjust arrest here and is responding in kind to his dog Fang being Stunned and still jkr goes out of her way to show that his friends are scared of him (because Hagrid is only likeable for his half-human part).

Another facet of the Gentle Giant that Hagrid embodies is the lack of smarts for Hagrid is also a kindhearted simpleton: he is never shown speaking standard english (which, in jkr's world, is a shorthand for dumb/uneducated), he cannot spell "Voldemort", he's routinely outwitted by literal children and he is remarkably gullible.

In keeping with jkr's theme wherein a man cannot express sadness via crying unless in moments of great loss and the characters who do cry are described mockingly, Hagrid is also a big fat overemotional crier. Hagrid and his tablecloth-sized handkerchief make multiple appearances throughout the books, often to comedic effect.

Another thing of note, albeit one I don't quite know how to interpret, is the use of Hagrid's name. His friends (Harry&co), his acquaintances (like Arthur Weasley) and even his colleagues at Hogwarts (who, by the way, call each other by their first names) all call him exclusively by his last name, Hagrid. The only times his full name is mentioned are:

when he introduces himself to Harry

when Ollivander recognizes him as he takes Harry to get his wand

when Dumbledore officially announces he's been made professor

in Rita Skeeter's hit piece on him (the fittingly titled Dumbledore's giant mistake)

when his escape from arrest is mentioned in Potterwatch

Harry mentions is full name only once (when introducing him at the beginning of HBP) but there is only one person in all of the books who ever addresses Hagrid by his first name only and it's not him: it's 16 year old Voldemort (in the memory Harry sees of Hagrid bring framed for Myrtle's death in CoS).

*= Hagrid's house is mostly described as a hut and occasionally as a cabin by the narration/Harry. Hagrid calls it a hut in PS and a house in CoS (when trying to chase Lucius Malfoy out of it) and Dumbledore also calls it a house the only time he refers to it (in GoF, when he's instructing McGonagall to go fetch Fang) but Harry only does so during exceptional times (when it gets burned down by death eaters immediately after Dumbledore's death in HBP, during Buckbeak's rescue in PoA and when it sits empty and sad after Hagrid's been taken to Azkaban in CoS).

2. REASONS NOT TO HATE HAGRID

I would like to take this moment to point out that all the shitty descriptors and stereotypes jkr uses for Hagrid are not actually why the Hagrid Haters Society finds him to be unlikeable.

Similarly, his half-giant status is a non-issue, though the same cannot be said for how the in-universe characters view him after his origins are revealed (most notably Ron). Hagrid himself seems to have a somewhat low opinion of them and even Hermione (our moral compass) can't come up with anything better to defend giants than "they can't all be horrible".

Still: Hagrid is not a full giant and the only full giant we do meet (his half-brother Grawp) is not described like what Ron tells us is a typical giant, namely:

Sure, Grawp is violent but not maliciously so (though he does behave rather King Kong-like with Hermione, which isn't great) and even if the books are judgy towards giants, there's no reason for us -the readers- to be (and for us to judge Hagrid unfairly by extension).

Another very bad reason to dislike Hagrid is his simple mindedness. jkr does seem to associate low intelligence with unlikeability/evil (see: Crabbe and Goyle) but she appears to make a not like other girls-style exception with Hagrid; regardless, I'd like to think we can all agree that jkr's shitty worldview is shitty.

3.HAGRID IS SOMETIMES OK

I'd be remiss not to mention that Hagrid is a generally helpful and friendly character who is well-liked by all Good People. One of his most admirable traits is definitely his loyalty, something which both Harry and Dumbledore are shown to believe unquestionably in and value immensely.

(from PS, Dumbledore entrusted Hagrid with the newly orphaned Harry)

(from DH, Harry suspects Hagrid may have let some information slip but is immediately prepared to forgive him)

Unlike Dumbledore, (whose motives I question, there's a great meta I currently can't find about Dumbledore's tendency to collect misfits, if you can link me to it please do) Harry genuinely loves and cares for Hagrid, which in my opinion goes a long way in rising his likability.

(from PoA, Harry recalls Hagrid's Azkaban stay)

Hagrid even gets the Ultimate Seal of Approval by being deemed brave, something both Harry and jkr value tremendously (in jkr's books brave=Good and coward=Evil).

Something that is perhaps more universally praise-worthy is Hagrid's steadfast faith in Harry

An especially notable instance comes from GoF, where he is shown to believe Harry unquestioningly when even Ron doesn't ( a big reason for his certainty seems to be his blind devotion to Dumbledore but I'll let that slide for now).

4. ULTIMATELY, THOUGH, HAGRID SUCKS

Why does the Hagrid Haters Society dislike Hagrid then?

Hagrid is surprisingly prejudiced

(to Vernon in PS)

(to Magorian the centaur in OotP)

(to Filch in HBP)

When it comes to humans (and human-like creatures), Hagrid does not seem nearly as open minded as he is with venomous beasts. Let's not forget that Hagrid is the one who introduces Harry to the all slytherins are evil concept

(from PS, Harry is introduced to the concept of the four houses)

This, while very much in line with jkr's views, is not a particularly popular opinion within the fandom on account of its black and white nature so I'm counting it against him.

Hagrid consistently shows disregard for his students' safety

Hagrid's love of dangerous beasts is described as a charming quirk in the books but it must be noted that, as an unnaturally big strong and burly man, he does not have much of a reason to fear them himself. The same cannot be said for his underage students, who are thoughtlessly put into harm's way time and time again (yes, this is when I bring up the Buckbeak Incident).

(from PoA)

Draco is undoubtedly in the wrong in this situation as he wilfully disregarded the instructions given to him but he is also behaving very much like your average shitty kid, something even a mildly competent teacher might expect (and, ideally, adjust their lesson accordingly). Draco's wound gets downplayed in all its following mentions and it's all but outright stated that Draco is playing up his injury in the weeks that follow but this doesn't make what happened to him right (even if in jkr's world bad things are only bad when they happen to good people).

(from GoF)

Here we have an injury not five minutes into the very first lesson on blast ended skrewts. Oh and by the way, those skewts? They are a delightfully illegal Hagrid's Original:

(also from GoF, Rita's hit piece is quite illuminating)

They are literally so dangerous that they're used as an obstacle in the Triwizard Tournament's third task.

(from GoF, Hagrid did not think about possibly making a group of children light-headed when deciding where to store the horses' whisky)

Hagrid repeatedly shows poor decision-making where the safety of his students is concerned; in a further show of less than stellar risk assessment, Hagrid assigns a biting, somewhat cannibalistic book to his 13 year old students (they are shown fighting each other viciously in their natural environment, a bookshop). Not a single one of his students (not even Hermione) figured out that they needed to be stroked in order to be opened; to quote Voice of Reason Draco Malfoy:

(from PoA, Hagrid's first ever lesson does not start well)

As an aside, though we're not supposed to agree with him, Draco is consistently the only person shown having reasonable reactions to Hagrid's classes. Even Hermione secretly agrees with him when it comes to the dangers posed by Hagrid's beasts:

(from GoF, Hermione literally made some shit up in order to defend Hagrid, blast ended skrewts are functionally useless)

This allows me to segue into the next section, aptly titled

the Malfoy section

Building on this theme, wherein Draco is an unrecognized truth teller à la Cassandra, I present to you a compilation of his greatest Care of Magical Creatures hits:

(from GoF, spoiler alert: there's no point to the skrewts)

(form GoF, Draco is reasonably risk-averse)

(from GoF, the inevitable conclusion to the skrewt saga)

Draco is vilified for hiding from a group of rampaging beasts (again, because coward=evil even when it's reasonable) even though he's not the only one who hides away (most of the class does) and it is generally implied by the narrative that Draco only criticises Hagrid because he's evil (because villains aren't allowed to be reasonable, even when they're right).

At this point I'd be remiss not to mention that, while Draco has some perfectly valid opinions regarding Hagrid's teaching skills, he at the same time also holds some truly shitty opinions on Hagrid as a person, some of which are no doubt courtesy of his father:

(from PS, Draco is speedrunning all the ways to get Harry to hate him on their first meeting)

Draco constantly refers to Hagrid as an oaf, like only evil people the likes of Filch, Riddle and Umbridge (and Phineas Nigellus's portrait, whose alignment is neutral evil at best) do.

(Interestingly, Hagrid is also the only person in the books to get the oaf moniker but that is neither here nor there.)

Of further note is the fact that Draco's relatively neutral opinion of Hagrid changes once Harry decides not to befriend him so some of his attitude could very well be caused by pettiness in a very "how dare you choose Ron Weasley over me" kind of way. Hagrid, after all, even gets a special mention in Draco's very first villain monologue

(from PS, Draco's very reasonable reaction to Harry's handshake snub)

Interestingly, Draco's opinion of Hagrid's half-giant status mirrors Ron's quite closely:

RON'S

DRACO'S

Ron doesn't seem to have terribly flattering views of magical beasts in general (in keeping with his everyman status, his opinions often mirror the general public's) but I still find it interesting. Also, note how ambivalent Draco seems to be about Hagrid's possibly dangerous nature, choosing to focus on likely reactions from the parents rather than on his own feelings.

In conclusion, Draco contains multitudes: he is often right when discussing Hagrid's teaching methods but he is also a dick and that lowers his general credibility. Speaking of teaching:

Hagrid is a terrible teacher

Non-Draco Malfoy people think Hagrid is a terrible teacher as well, though they are quickly shut down by Harry & co, (loyal to a fault even if they secretly agree) whenever this is mentioned:

(from GoF)

(also from GoF, though it's a sentiment Hermione expresses several times)

(from OotP)

Remember how I said that Harry and Ron themselves dislike Hagrid's classes? They (+ less unexpectedly Hermione) end up dropping the class as soon as they're able to, as apparently does the rest of their year:

(from HBP)

Hagrid, it seems, is such a bad teacher that he scared all the students from Harry's cohort off of the subject.

Hagrid can be surprisingly mean spirited

EXHIBIT A:

(from PS, during the Forbidden Forest scene)

Hagrid here is demonstrating a delightful melange of the reasons the Society dislikes him:

by choosing to take a bunch of ickle fristies to the Forbidden Forest with him (a forest he himself has called dangerous before, a forest he also described chasing Ron's siblings off of) Hagrid is showing his terrible risk assessment skills, which end up putting Harry (and Draco but mostly just Harry) in danger; Hagrid may not have known that Voldemort-as-Quirrell was gallivanting about the forest killing unicorns but he definitely knew someone was.

by behaving antagonistically towards Draco, an 11 y.o. he just met, Hagrid (the adult in a position of authority) is showing his tendency to see things in black and white. Draco is a Slytherin ( = evil) and also Lucius Malfoy's son (double evil), nevermind that Draco is actually in detention despite having followed the rules (in that he reported someone for having an illegal Dragon).

Speaking of, Hagrid knows there really was a dragon on Hogwarts grounds on account of he's the reason it came to be at Hogwarts in the first place. Harry & co. got in trouble for helping to rectify his mistake (and, in Neville's case, for trying to do Harry a solid) yet somehow he has the gall to say "yeh've done wrong an' now yeh've got ter pay fer it". I immensely dislike this, even if this is directed solely towards Draco, whom we're not supposed to like.

EXHIBIT B:

Speaking of incredible feats of inappropriate behaviour from Hagrid (an authority figure) towards Draco (his shitty student), here's this gem:

(from GoF, Hagrid's very reasonable response to Draco's understandable hesitance to spend his leisure time attending to the dreaded skrewts)

I know that Hogwarts teachers in general are not exactly known to be beacons of professionalism but that doesn't make Hagrid's threat un-shitty, it just puts him on the same level as noted bully Severus Snape (and also Fake Moody but at least he's got the Death Eater excuse).

5. CONCLUSION

A big reason why I find myself disliking Hagrid is that he's a perfect exemplification of jkr's shitty worldviews. As an author, she does this awful thing wherein a character's actions are only ever truly reprehensible if they're committed by a Bad Guy and I hate it in every single instance: Snape's treatment of Neville is just as bad as his grandma's, Dumbledore's shitty handing of Harry is not excused by his noble big-picture intentions, bullying is bad even when it's people you like that do it and femininity doesn't cease being problematic (jkr's worldview, not mine) when it's the not like other girls who practice it.

Ultimately, while I do acknowledge that there's nothing truly awful about Hagrid's character I still find myself disliking him, be it from irrational reasons (he's a Dumbledore fanboy) or from the reasons listed above. Still, I can't be the only one, right?

right?

[isogenderskitty]

people who’ve only seen hatchetfield: starkid has like practically no gay characters :/

the avp trilogy which has been sitting right there for probably most of their lives and is the foundation of everything:

plus these less explicit more headcanony (but like, BARELY) examples that i really think are worth mentioning as well, i have receipts don’t tempt me i will literally make an entire video about this stuff (and i might actually):

[aiuredsworld]

________________________

You have my wand

________________________

What if draco didn’t survive and harry carried the hawthorn wand into his final battle What if when harry used the wand he could feel draco existence. Harry’d chant “be with me” repeatedly and draco’d whisper silently into his ear “I’m here with you” but harry couldn’t hear a thing bc draco was already dead

[painedpen]

I saw a tiktok about Ron yelling at Hermione and embarrassing her in public (he would never), and Draco punching him in the face and I am so. Tired.

Like. We’ve already established that once Ron is committed to his relationship with Hermione, he’s peak husband material. He’s lovely. Househusband extraordinaire. But the idea of Draco Malfoy beating him up???

I like Draco as much as the next person, but we need to acknowledge that he’s a lil bitch. Every time he pisses someone off, he eats shit. Ron beats that twink into the ground on the regular. Come on people, let’s be real.

[short666bread]

Get Haunted

[flovoid]

What kind of love are you?

Love as Youth

Your love is buoyant. Your love is bountiful. It is ageless, and it will never age. When you fall in love, it is breathless. It is joyful and endless, it is magnificent. You think it, like your youth , will last forever. Youth is eternal, and so is your love. Your love skips rocks and tells stories, your love roasts marshmallows over fires, and laughs freely. Your love does not take itself too seriously. Your love is jumping into puddles just to watch the water splash, and dancing in the rain, and it is watching Sunday morning reruns of cartoons to feel young once more. Your love is forever, forever young. Being loved by you is to be loved by the summer months. And those never end, do they? Well, I won’t tell if you don’t.

Love as a Choice

You choose to love. Love does not come to you easily, but every day you wake up and choose it. It would be so easy, wouldn't it, to grow cold and callous and grim. But you rise to greet the world, making the conscious effort to find something, anything to love. When you fall for someone, you do not kid yourself of their flaws. Instead, you resolve to see them for who they are, mistakes and all and you love them all the same. Your love is work, and it does not come easy. Your love sweats and toils. It is calloused and sunburned; it bears scars and comes with stories. Your love is worn, but it is no less valuable for it. Being loved by you is like being loved by a gardener, a mother, a teacher. Your love may not always be the simplest, but it is worth the effort.

AAAA THANK YOU @roos-bowl-o-soup for the tag!!!

also tagging @elderwisp @elksun @circusjuney @buttertrait @nikatyler @ninawhims @autumnserenade @machinegrl @acuar-io

& anyone who wanna do it go do it! also if you are tagged and don’t feel doing it just ignore this!

[iamnmbr3]

Harry: So I chose someone a little bit unusual to go to Slughorn's party with me but-

Ron: Oh no. Oh no. It's happening isn't it? It's actually happening.

Harry: What?

Ron: Is the person very blond?

Harry: Yes.

Ron: With silver eyes?

Harry: Yeah actually. How did you-

Ron: And do they idolize their father and repeat all of his crazy views as fact?

Harry: Yup! You've guessed it! Or did someone already tell you I'm going with- Ron? Are you alright?

Ron: I can't believe it. It happened. It actually happened. Hermione and I saw this coming but oh Merlin.

Harry: What's wrong with taking Luna?

Ron: Luna? .... Oh. Oh. LUNA. LUNA LOVEGOOD.

Harry: Obviously.

Ron: YOU'RE TAKING LUNA LOVEGOOD! THANK GOD!

Harry: ...Yes. Who did you think I meant?

Ron: Nevermind but wow you sure have a type huh?

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

I know Harry and Draco are Drarry. I know. It’s a thing. It’s The Thing.

But.

Hear me out.

StarScar

[daddiesdrarryy]

*Hogwarts Sixth Year*

Pansy: Potter is watching you again, what a creep

Draco: He’s so in love with me

Pansy: What?

Draco: He wants me, I feel it, Pansy. Why else would he watch me every day if he’s not insanely in love with me?

Pansy: I think you’re the insane one, Draco

[hephaestiions]

author reclist: toomuchplor

a few months ago, when i was coming back to fandom in earnest, i came across this post from @sitp-recs. explorations of faith, divinity and worship are some of the tropes i find most furiously compelling, so i had to jump into o come, all ye faithful as soon as possible. i did, only to fall headfirst in obsessive, wide-eyed, awe-inspired love. @toomuchplor writes a desire that's both slow and heady, relentless and gentle, all-consuming and a rest stop to breathe easy. i couldn't help but read through (most of) their catalogue in a matter of days. this author's thematic range is astonishing, their characterisations lead to delicious stories where two headstrong, wilful and perennially longing men crash, fumble and rush into achingly sweet love and burning lust.

what always spools me in with plor, though, is their use of circumstance, especially in longer fics. every fic has a premise iron-clad in its fascinating, inventive, raw and exciting potential. more often than not, i've found them doing something i haven't encountered before in fandom at all, or reworking a popular trope in ways that make you go, 'oh. oh, i never thought about that happening, how did i never think of that happening?'

i've loved everything i've read from them, but here's a selection of some of my absolute favourites that i'll be going back to, over and over:

i've got a beautiful feeling (everything's going my way) (E, 3.5k)

“I’ve got such a boner,” Harry says, voice scratchy, just slitting his eyes open now, turning his head on his pillow to face Draco. “Oh, lovely, good morning to you, too,” Draco says.

a slice of life like the plush inside of a ripe mango— a love that's mature, constant, beating like a strong heart. the filthy, hilarious, gorgeous portrait of harry and draco's married life— the familiarity of sex, the rush of wanting each other as much as ever.

o come, all ye faithful & all the angels cry amen (E, ~22k total)

In which Draco finds faith in the church, and Harry finds faith in Draco.

an achingly tender rumination on faith as love, and love as worship. one of the most heartbreaking and realistic depictions of the reckoning it would take for harry potter to accept he has found refuge and rest in draco malfoy's arms. i loved the non-chronological, dual timeline storytelling— that particular form works so well when there's a taut, twinging thread holding both narratives together, and harry and draco's gravitational attraction to each other, fraught in parts and at peace in others was the perfect anchor.

time and too much don't belong together (E, 23k)

A Malfoy family heirloom gets triggered in a raid, binding Draco Malfoy to Ron Weasley; neither of them is too chuffed about this.

a masterclass in revelations. the reader can tell, from the outset, there's more here than meets the eye. the reader can also guess, from the beginning, what the dynamic in the shadows is. tense and breathtaking writing, you know what's coming, but every time you're fed a morsel you cling to it with both hands. one of the most inventive takes i've seen on the lust potion/spell trope in this fandom, and done in a way that makes you want to see it over and over and over again.

polar night/midnight sun (E, 54k)

Harry travels to arctic Norway on the trail of dragon egg poachers, only to find he's been assigned to work alongside the only NorMagPol Auror north of sixty: one Draco Malfoy. It's been ten years since they crossed paths, and Malfoy isn't exactly what Harry expected or remembered. For one thing, he wears a lot more hand-knits? When a sudden winter storm strands the pair, unable to use magic to rescue themselves, they take shelter in a one-room Norwegian hytte.

exquisitely atmospheric. uses extenuating circumstances in some of the most delicious ways. builds character and interpersonal dynamics through those small little elements of storytelling (draco in knitwear! brynjar the dog! the mundane pillowtalk! the quirks of their miscommunication!) that go the longest way in having characters leap off the screen into your personal space. also the sex in this is absolutely mind-blowing, i was hooked on every glorious word.

truth to materials (co-written by lately) (E, 58k)

In which Harry learns to appreciate art and other pleasures of the flesh.

decadent. in premise, in language, in characterisation, just absolutely decadent. this version of harry, bewildered and captivated by draco's out-there artistry is one of the funniest and most endearing i've encountered in fic, ever. his head, so full of determination and good intentions and terribly flawed and completely believable thinking, was such a brilliant place to set this fic. and draco— lord. you know that moment of transition, that click, when a piece of art goes from something untouchable and distant to a soulful thing you keep close because you recognise it as a cultural, emotional response? this fic felt like a literary project trying to capture that click, except it's a shift in perspective about a person. draco— the cool, untouchable, subversive artist who becomes irrevocably, warmly, achingly human.

probationary action (E, 63k)

As part of the terms of the probationary contract, DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY shall submit for inspection his WAND on the last day of every month, such inspection to be carried out by a duly registered and fully qualified AUROR in the employ of the MINISTRY OF MAGIC, and such inspection to include a PRIORI INCANTATEM spell to ensure that no PROHIBITED MAGICS as heretofore described have been practised by the aforementioned probationer.

*incoherent screaming*. a fic that starts with a premise so lighthearted and filthy that you think it's going to be a long, kinky fic about two rather hilariously perverted men getting it on, except it also gets into some of the most resonant discussions of post-war revenge tactics and human rights neglect i've ever read. the dynamic between harry and draco is simultaneously so light and so weighted, this is a fic that holds you down and keeps you there till you're done.

in conclusion: an entrancing author, a gift of a writer. i can't wait to see what else they have in store for this fandom.

[inkyarcturus]

Is this what yall imagine I look like whenever I post one of my rambling thoughts on here? Because this is what I feel like whenever I write them out.

[callmesel]

I just remembered that someone had a headcanon about the Weasleys thinking that Percy was Narcissa Malfoy's sugar baby because they were friendly and Narcissa didn't stop sending him gifts and letter about him moving in with her so they could see each other more often.