#dorky dad vibes for the win

[sparkles-rule-4eva]

Saw this shirt at work

TELL ME TOM WOULDN'T WEAR THIS 🤣

[johnslittlespoon]

i have been dealing with the brainrot of twink college student john and biker gale but then the other half of the post jumped me in a dark alley and all i can think about is john's friend who is used to their friends having crushes on their dad but it's whatever. weird, but whatever, as long as they don't get vocal about it they can just use it as something to tease them about at the worse. john looking up at gale with big doe eyes isn't the first time they've seen a friend do that, they've seen other people who are considered more age appropriate do worse when faced with the gale cleven effect. only it never occurs to them gale feels like he can't breathe right and like is organs are too big for chest whenever he looks at john and feels like he's something too soft than he should allow himself to be but around john it doesn't feel bad, maybe it's a good thing he can unapologetically be soft for someone.

cue the ladies who thought they might be able to win over the quiet, intimating and rugged dilf biker seeing that his heart was stolen by none other than john clarence egan, the son of mr and mrs egan who everyone is sure are moments away from a heart attack.

the au post | GOD same it has notttt left my mind. and you GET ITTT you captured the vibe i was picturing for that version perfectly ugh.

literally 1k+ words of brainrot below the cut... deeply sorry. any excuse to talk about them and i'm spinning in my chair apparently LOL <3

like john takes one look at gale and knows he's not the only one who swoons over him, spends an ungodly amount of time pining from day one. but any fantasies are only fantasies, because he knows (thinks he knows) he doesn't stand a chance, both for the fact that he's his son's friend, and that gale probably thinks he's too immature, and that he's, y'know, not a girl.

but gale is gone too from their first meeting, he's just a lot better at hiding it (and finds it so endearing how bad john is at hiding it despite how well john thinks he's doing lol.) once he and john start tentatively feeling things out, and even before that really, the way he feels when he looks at the doe–eyed boy scares him– a vulnerable softness and urge to protect that he's been just fine with not feeling.

of course there's the conflict when he tries to shove down these feelings at first, because he knows how mad his son (who i headcanon as ken because he and leaving!john would be precious dorky besties) would be if he were to ever indulge in them, regardless of how much john wants it. and there's the guilt of feeling like john would be happier with someone his age, but john is the most persistent, stubborn person he's ever met, and the way he folds so quickly for him is terrifying.

and yet he falls for the attentive softhearted absolute puppy dog of a boy that john is, finds himself as fond of his moments of angsty bite and bristle as he is when he's docile at his side, melting under gale's gaze. there's no proper confirmation ever made to others about their status, no reason to need one, because they're attached at the hip and people learn quickly not to so much as look at john the wrong way, because gale's never far behind him.

and the angsttt of john's parent's disapproval– yeah, he's an adult and he's independent and is off doing college and all, but his parents aren't chill with "that gay shit" and he gets the classic "so long as you're living under our roof, you're not to see that man" talk, and what's an angsty rebellious lovesick john to do but get better at sneaking out of his window and jogging down the street to meet gale at his motorcycle so his parents don't hear it pull up?

i'm sure eventually it would come to a head because they'd find out he's been going behind their back when they catch him sneaking back inside late one night, and he's given the good old "stop seeing him or pack your bags" ultimatum. it takes gale a wild amount of self control to not storm into the house and chew out john's parents when he picks up the phone to a sniffling terrified john at two in the morning less than an hour after he'd dropped him off down the street.

it takes even more self control when he sees the angry red of a handprint on john's cheek when he pulls up and finds him sat on the curb with a hastily stuffed backpack, and his heart shatters when john starts apologizing, as if he'd ever be upset with him. but then, cue domesticity (and a different kind of sneaking around) as john temporarily moves in with him and ken. all ken is told is that john's parents kicked him out and he knows how badly they treat him so he doesn't ask many questions, so shitty circumstances aside, he's over the moon at getting to have his best friend stay with him.

john promises to find someplace to rent a room in as soon as he can because he feels awful for intruding, but gale finds that he really likes having john around, insists he stays with the two of them at least till he's done with his semester so he doesn't have to worry about paying rent. lots of nuance to sort out there but you get the gist. <3

also. john wearing gale's leather jacket sighhh. finding any excuse he can to steal it, face going all pink when gale drapes it over his shoulders when they're out on dates, beaming when gale lets him wear it home with the promise that he'll return it the next day, falling asleep with his face pressed to it, drowning in the smell of gale's aftershave and cigarettes and diesel.

+ slight tangent but the things that could come about from the sneaking around?? minor spoilers for anyone who hasn't seen callum's show 'leaving' that his character in this au is loosely based off of, but there's a scene where he and his milf not–gf are fooling around in his room and his parents get home early.

i have this scene in my head where john thinks he's meant to have the house to himself for the night, invites gale over, they end up in the shower and they hear the front door slam mid–fuck. there's a moment of panic, both of them freezing, john whispers that "dad's probably forgot his wallet or something," assumes gale will stay unmoving until they hear the door slam again.

only gale suddenly rolls his hips forward, and john chokes on a moan, gale's hand coming up to quickly cover his mouth, his other hand squeezing john's hip as he kisses his shoulder and murmurs "you can be quiet, can't you, sweetheart?"

anyway. yeah, this au has me in a chokehold so hard still, i'm 100% still planning on writing it post–dog fic <3 i do love this whole cliche best friend's dad route of this au, but i'm also not sure i feel like tackling the conflict of john having his friend find out about the two of them, and i feel like that would be kinda inevitable to have to write about if i took that route for the fic lol </3 so i think that version of the au will be limited to brainrot like this and when i write the actual fic it'll just be the college student x bikerider vibe, but honestly there's so much overlap with the two concepts anyway that it won't make too much of a difference!

thx for unintentionally encouraging my yapping i love this version of these two so much and i am apologizing in advance for the person i will become when i see the bikeriders in theatres xoxo

[imaginedreamwrite]

PT x plus size reader opinion - all the boys could be become SO for our dear reader but in different circumstances. Here is my take:

Bucky and Curtis seems like type of men who would be interested in Reader after few interaction (not quite 'love at first sight', but 'I know you for a month and it is enough for me to know you are perfect), but they are awkward/too serious/can't talk about their emotions and Reader is confused. They both would do things for her and take care of her needs while giving no signs of 'hey, let's make out and date and maybe marry each other in few weeks' and are more like 'fuck this world, but you are cool, but fuck this world' vibe, so Reader who obviously has a crush doesn't know what to do.

Jake would probably bond with her daughter, taking a role of new uncle with Natasha and Wanda as aunts. While Reader is confident, she doesn't think Jake is interested in her (and she doesn't let herself even think about him becoming a dad to her daughter even though their relationship is so cute) - he is just lovely and dorky person who obviously is good with kids and happens to know her girlfriends. And Jake? He is dying inside because Reader is perfect, he loves her daughter and all he dreams about is them making out for the rest of their lives.

Steve quickly becomes Reader's gym buddy, but Reader is intimidated, because he looks like a Greek God. But he is true gentleman and actually quite shy. So, their romance slowly began to blossom while both of them don't acknowledge their feelings until tension is so strong that Steve fucks Reader in the gym or elsewhere - location doesn't matter, because the sex is 🔥 everywhere. (I feel like there should be an angsty part. Like Reader overheard a nasty comment made by other PT who implies that Steve has a sexual relationship with Reader 'for fun' and believed it).

Ari strikes me a owner of gym and girls make him meet with Reader because she can help him business wise. They bond over the gym (both sport and business parts) and Ari doesn't mind adding romantic part to their relationship, but Reader has complicated relationship with father of her child and her daughter is absolutely hostile towards him (she is just intimidated by the giant and obviously whole mess with her father doesn't let her open up to him). So, if he really wants to be with Reader, he has to win not only Reader's heart and trust, but her daughter's too.

First, I love how in depth this is! This is incredible and I admire you so much for it! Thank you!

Bucky and Curtis — 💯 they give me vibes of touch her and die, or she is mine/ours but she doesn’t know she’s mine/ours. Both a little cantankerous, they’re genuine with few people and reader/her daughter at at the core of their niceties

“Fuck then all, fuck everyone else.” “Except you two.”

Jake is the quickest (imo) to be all in all at once while Reader is hesitant because he’s so goofy and dorky and he makes everyone smile and why would he bother with a single mother?

Jake waves his hand in front of you with a cockeyed grin, picturing the rest of his life with you and your daughter. “You are the girls I’m looking for.”

Steve is a giant, he’s second only to Ari and he knows that Reader’s scared of him, but not truly scared more intimidated. He starts slow with her, knowing he’s got to ease her into a place of comfort. He starts with a fresh water bottle when she first gets in, and it slowly builds until the tension between them is electrifying—and then he takes her, reassuring her that everything she hears about his past, or what his intentions are with her, are lies

“Give me one more,” his lips suckle on the shell of your ear, sweat rolling down the back of your neck as his fingers fill you, his hands already drawing multiple orgasms from you without deeper penetration, “and tell me what I want to hear.”

I think with Ari he would’ve seen her around before with Nat & Wanda, maybe during some parties or events Reader is invited to, and he’s drawn to her. Without knowing much about her, he talks to Nat & Wanda who want to be matchmakers and know that Ari would be good for her. However Reader’s ex is an ass and that took a toll on her daughter and Ari needs to fix what was damaged

“Honeybee and bumblebee,” he crouched before her, gently nuzzling the stuffed bee into her arms, “you don’t have to be afraid of me. I’m not gonna hurt you, honeybee. I promise, I’m going to keep you safe from every monster whose ever frightened you.”

[weirdratblogs]

Consider: An original flavor Card Game Anime, following the Next Generation of that particular universe - with little to no initial explanation of what happened The Last Time Shit Got Fucky. So the parent’s of the principle cast is at least halfway made up of people who only heard about the Card Game in passing a couple of decades ago, and the other half are the thoroughly traumatized mass of people that dressed and acted like cultists, grave robbers, bikers, druids, and dinosaur aficionados to match their Deck’s Aesthetic back in middle/high school when they were fighting against multiple multi-dimensional/alien/spiritual threats.

That Card Game That Caused Shit To Be Weird For Four Or Five Years has long passed into obscurity, though it’s making a comeback because of an online version like Magic Arena or a Card Game Anime Within A Card Game Anime. 

Some of the parents have maintained at least some semblance of interest over the years, all of the ones that were Involved have their clothes from back then. They’re going to start buying new ones, though, the second they notice that their kids are Acting Fucky, just so they can be the cavalry when DourMause The Reprehensible spirits their children away to The Spirit Realm for a new war between Order and Chaos.

The anime is split for the most part. You’ve got the kids learning the card game and how the Spirit World and Order and Chaos work but absolutely vibing with this Strang New World, and you’ve got their veteran parents who’ve Been There Done That trying to catch up with their kids and complaining about the hike and the weather but are also absolutely stomping the baddies they run into.

Like, GogglesKid ProtagonistGuy barely ekes out a win using a really convoluted strategy that probably should have failed against some mini-boss villain. Meanwhile, GogglesDad FormerProtagonist curb-stomps a Dark General with a bullshit one-turn infinite recursion combo that still works in the Spirit World because Spirits Don’t Do Banlists.

AntiHero RivalKid is going on and on about how Spirits Are Tools and he has to get strong enough to go home, no matter the cost. FormerlyAntiHero RivalDad is this courteous old guy that all the spirits they meet vibe with to hell and back, giving them gifts because He’s Grown Into Such a Kind Young Man.

Just, fucking, force feed me this dichotomy. Provide me with a scene near the end where the kids are beaten down and the Bad Guy is about to win, where a Final Blow is about to connect but never does because the Cavalry’s Here. 

The absurdity of how the parents look in their Aesthetic Card Game Character outfits comes back with a vengeance because we’ve had 52 episodes to grow used to it, but FemmeDruid MainGirl is only just seeing her dorky-ass soccer mom dressed in her BadGirl DemonDeck outfit (thick, spike-covered leather jacket, knee-length leather boots, a spiked collar, and a single, elbow-length glove) and SecondaryRival NonVillainousRival is just now seeing his accountant-ass dad dressed in his pre-bifocals FireThemed HotHead outfiit (Just... picture natsu dragneel, but he’s got a shitty dyejob).

[workingforitallthetime]

welcome, playoff canes shippers!

are you feeling lost and lonely now that the flyers, sabres, red wings, or stars are headed out to their offseason tee times? are you left holding a big bucket of shippy feelings and you don’t know which direction to fling them in? well, the carolina hurricanes are here to teach you how to love again. c’mon, let’s fix you up with a canes ship for the playoffs.

If you like: bitchy cats who hate everybody you should try: sebastian aho/teuvo teräväinen

finn it to win it, baby! aho/turbo has a very ace/aro life partners vibe, where both of them don’t like anybody but maybe deep down they would begrudgingly admit they like each other. please don’t watch this clip of them playing fortnite together... it’s so boring and they’re so happy. they must be in love because nobody else in the world would put up with this shit.

if you like: a flirty little minx and a confident older mentor you should try: vincent trocheck/martin nečas

so you’re a simple guy/gal/nonbinary pal with simple needs, and those needs are a twink posting thirst traps in his boxer briefs and an older bearded guy ready to show him the ropes. i am sorry to tell you that andrei svechnikov/jordan martinook is very much not this ship. but! fortunately the canes offer you an even better alternative: sugar boo marty necas and paisan vincent trocheck. necas is the team baby despite being older than svechy, and trocheck was acquired from the panthers at the 2020 trade deadline and has responded by becoming a leading goal scorer who’s gunning for an A next year. check out this gif of nechy getting aggressive when a former teammate gives vinny a friendly little bump.

if you like: a handsome young superstar and the lovable fourth line grinder who’ll fight for him you should try: jordan martinook/andrei svechnikov

look, i already made you a wholeass primer about why this is the best ship in the entire goddamned nhl. if you’re not on board yet, i give up.

if you like: chirping as a love language you should try: dougie hamilton/warren foegele

yes, i understand svech is in that photo too. that’s just a bonus. svech should be in every photo, frankly. but ignore him for a moment and let’s focus on the absolutely divine dynamic that dougie and foegs have when left alone together. foegs keeps bitching and bitching at dougie, trying to get a rise out of him, and dougie just placidly lets it roll off his back. exquisite. get married about it.

if you like: best friend boyfriends you should try: dougie/svech or brock/marty

FINE i GUESS a lot of people ship svech/dougie but it is not as good a ship as svech/marty and i will die on that hill. however if you like sweet dorky college boyfriends who move to the big city and get a cat, these guys have you covered.

HOWEVER if you are more into rough and tumble BFFs who might have grown up together riding their quads around the gravel pit, let me offer you bottom-sixers brock mcginn and jordan martinook. these dudes are the beating heart of the carolina hurricanes. brock is practically indestructible and energy guy marty makes the entire team better regardless of his own stats.

if you like: HIM BIG you should try: jani hakanpää self-insert

the canes acquired a finnish old god at the trade deadline and we all immediately turned into this girl. this thor-faced motherfucker cooks elaborate meals and posts photos of them on his instagram, and he looks great in glasses. go on, y/n, indulge yourself.

however!

if you like: some real fairy tale bullshit you should try: jani hakanpää/sebastian aho

(full credit to @marmolita​ for conceptualizing this ship for me.) once upon a time, 18-year-old sebastian was spending one last season with kärpät before going on to tear it up with the hurricanes, and 23-year-old jani landed with kärpät after a couple of unimpressive seasons in the ahl. i imagine lumbering jani, his nhl career slipping out of his grasp, watching young phenom sebastian from across the ice, fast and sharp-toothed and absolutely off limits. (sebastian’s dad worked for the team!) fast forward five years and jani ends up in the canes locker room in the stall next to sebastian’s. only now sebastian’s all grown up and knows what he wants. delicious.

if you like: twink4twink you should try: andrei svechnikov/martin nečas

these big-pawed puppies do a very enthusiastic chest bump before every game. once they went on a romantic getaway for spring break. sometimes i zoom in on this photo just to look at svechy’s shoulder freckles.

[stardew-mermaid]

im WEAK for my faves as parents and i know lots of y'all are too so here are

bachelors as dads vibes

(bachelorettes as moms will come soon too ❤️ under cut cause it got very long lol)

sebastian

a chill dad. when u were very little he'd let u sit in his lap while he codes and consequently u find heavy metal soothing cause he would be playing it while he works and u would always fall asleep against him

if he wasn't using his second computer u could play around on it while he works. 'existing in each other's company while u both do stuff' time becomes a regular thing even as u get older, u would do ur homework next to him at his desk and he'd help if u were confused

the first time u were deemed old enough to go for a ride on his motorcycle u were SO fucking hyped even if u had to be absolutely decked out in protective gear. sometimes while u were in high school he'd help you flex by picking you up/dropping you off on the bike

would bundle u up in his hoodies as a toddler and there's a few pics of u absolutely SWIMMING in them with the hood all the way over ur face pretending to be the grim reaper. he'd never been so proud

elliott

an eloquent dad, but still has goofy dadlike tendencies. he may be the picture of a dark academia dilf with his slacks and button ups sipping coffee in the morning over a manuscript, but he'll still make the jokes. calls u things like little one and taught u to play piano

he got u ur own little bookshelf for all ur baby books and he'd read to you every single night without fail. he'd make up stories too and u would help and make a collab tho it often got u more excited than relaxed for bed but it was worth it!!! when u were grown up u helped him compile the short stories u made up together and published it. he'd also share with u poems he wrote for you and about you over the years, lots of them to do with the wonder of watching a whole tiny person grow into a big person

would always take u on nature walks and play at the beach!!! u would find shells and rocks to give to him and he'd always look like u just handed him pure gold

u made a pact that u would sit still for him while he did ur hair if u could braid his hair in turn. u both looked very stylish

sam

cool dad!!! fun dad!!!! watches anime with u when u get into it and is forever ur player 2. if u had a skateboard or a scooter he'd always show u up by pulling off sick tricks and it became a friendly rivalry. taught u to stick it to the man at a very early age. teaches u to play guitar and took u to ur first rock concert when u were like 8

there are baby photos of u wearing sunglasses that cover half ur face and when asked about it he'd say 'u were just a rly cool baby!!!!' in some of them he's wearing matching sunglasses and carrying u in one of those front baby pouches. he'd also always sing to you as a baby and still does it idly sometimes and has written songs for u!!!!

ur #1 hypeman. praises u for everything and always makes sure u know how cool u are just for existing. he loses his mind at ur grade school talent show and at ur graduation he's there holding up his phone and crying like FUCK IT UP KENNETH!!!!! 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️

tho alongside all the fun he teaches u to be very responsible and polite and above all extremely kind!!!!

shane

has the most potent typical dad energy. the socks with sandals, the jokes, the ac/dc, the funny hobby projects, the rivalry with other pta parents, all of it. calls u squirt and kiddo and the kind to ruffle ur hair. always gives u piggy back rides even as u get older, says it helps him stay in shape. when u were little you'd always bap ur baby hands against his stubble cause heehee funny scratchy face

u loved when he was in charge of dinner growing up cause it was often takeout pizza/burgers. 'hey im making a pot of kraft dinner should i double it for u' kind of guy, adds cut up hot dogs and after ur other parent voices a need for nutrition adds frozen veggies too. VERY good at cooking all kinds of eggs tho, would always feed u eggs from his own chickens and would accept nothing less!!!

teaches u a lot about chickens and some of ur fave memories with him are in the coop or chillin in a field in spring with him and the new chicks. some other faves include the regular tea parties with him and cousin jas, and even as u both get older u all sit down and have tea together sometimes and occasionally break out one of the old barbie movies for funsies

u learned how to say fuck from him when u were 3 and he died laughing. if called and told that u got into a fight at school would reply with 'did they win'

harvey

sweet, dorky doctor dad. would get SUPER worried whenever u got so much as a cold, made u stay home and rest and HYDRATE. taught u proper medical standard handwashing from when u first learned how to turn on the tap, also taught u a lot of basic first aid. when u were fussy he would read u his old textbooks from med school and it'd get you to sleep in minutes

refuses to let u leave the house without eating something first and would often get up early to make u a big breakfast before school (it's the most important meal of the day!!!!). yes it's ok if ur late ur english teacher can wait until you've had ur veggies. when u were a baby his standard of keeping u fed was 'if i had to change less than five diapers a day it wasn't enough'. encourages taking a snack and water everywhere

as u got older u realized how hardworking he is so u make sure he knows how much u love and appreciate him, goes all out for his bday and father's day like how he goes all out for u every day and it makes him cry. he cries at ur first birthday and ur graduation too, cried when u got him a #1 DAD mug specifically for his morning coffee, he just cries a lot and it's very endearing, dad taught u it's okay to be emotional. u also gift him funky socks to wear at work and he goes bananas for them

he taught u how to assemble model planes and u would sit with him while he tuned his old radio, u liked the bwee bwee sounds. he would play jazz and swing and dance with u standing on his feet. when u were little u liked to play with his moustache and occasionally he would fall asleep while watching u but the most u ever did was add a goatee to the stache with washable marker which he thought was pretty funny

alex

strong dad!!! jock dad!!!!! would flex and let u hang off his bicep, play wrestle (u would always win), sit u on his shoulders and run around making airplane noises, play sportsball in the yard and would come up with fun challenges for u if u got bored of catch. pretty much the master of keeping ur baby self entertained and was always there to tuck u in for a nap when u got tired out

makes an extra protein shake for u every morning and loads of scrambled eggs, will also sneak u a cookie tho

he's always super encouraging and positive and enthusiastic about everything u do which u pick up fast. u go to his games and even if sports turns out not to be ur thing the fact that ur there rooting for him makes him put in 1000% effort, calls u his good luck charm!!!! he will also throw u over his shoulders and use u for weightlifting while u shout encouragement directly into his ear. this continues until ur grown up (and sometimes even then so he can flex even as an 'old man')

gets really really worried about you whenever ur sick or get hurt and will lose sleep over it but stays upbeat for ur sake. he will cuddle u tho. sometimes you'll ask for stories about ur grandma and he'll tell u and it's so nice to him to talk about his mother and smile instead of being sad, you help him heal because it's so wonderful to think of her as a grandmother and how proud she'd be. he plays her music box for u to help u sleep when ur little and it still makes u feel sleepy and safe when ur older

[diavolosthots]

Ive been holding off on these because i have so many but I just wanna share. This got kinda long so it's under the cut, and this isnt even all of it.

Random Headcanons I have about Obey Me:

Time definitely runs different and all of them are eons older than any of us, including luke. My next question is WHAT is their skincare routine

I remember in one lesson (26 i believe???) Diavolo said that RAD isnt even that old which is true and also not. Its old in human standards, not old in demon standards

I believe Diavolo's dad isnt really sleeping, although everyone says he's locked away and doing such, I have a feeling hes secretly pulling all the strings for everyone behind the scenes

Levi definitely reads "normal" books and Satan definitely reads manga.

Human rules definitely don't apply in either the Devildom or the Celestial Realm. I would love to see a Devildom law book, honestly.

All of them definitely have done something bad in the past. In a sense, i even believe that they each own a circle of hell (since they mentioned Dante's inferno before if i remember correctly). It at least would make sense.

I dont believe their demon form is their true form.

Asmodeus is more insecure than confident but he tries to overshadow it with make believe narcissism.

Luke is definitely smart as hell and in certain instances I believe he could win a wit battle with Satan.

I dont believe demons and humans can reproduce. Demon sperm is like... Foreign to the human body and although the human body can get used to it, it would take forever to successfully create something

On that note, pregnancy would be dangerous af since demons do tend to grow horns and wings that could easily rupture through the uterine wall.

Lucifer is definitely a lowkey alcoholic lol (low-key because it's not always). In one of the rooms, the secret room behind the library, theres stacks of alcohol on the shelf and it doesnt surprise me that he takes a swing/full bottle every once in a while

Mammon kind of contradicts himself. They say you'll be lucky when mammons around but hes never lucky with himself so either that means he's lucky to everyone but himself OR he needs to believe in luck/himself first

Leviathan has split personalities. On one hand theres the dorky otaku we all love and on the other hand theres the Grand Admiral of Hells Navy, who gets quite bossy and honestly kind of harsh.

Satan definitely is a playboy. I also see him go clubbing with Asmodeus a lot

Beelzebub is far from the soft boy we like for him to be but other than his brothers and fellow demons, he actually has a good grip on his anger and to an extent i believe he won't lose it because of Belphie. Seeing Beel angry is a huge reminder on the Celestial war and Belphie really hated it, for obvious reasons.

Belphie sleeps a lot because, like many of us, he likes to escape reality. I believe the reason his avatar is sloth is not because he's lazy but more so because he hates to be awake and recall everything that happens. Its easier to deal with you dont think.

Diavolo definitely has an ulterior motive and although I love and appreciate his character, i wouldnt blindly trust him. Much like Satan and Belphegor, hes an A+ manipulator

I believe Barbatos is actually the oldest, having been around while Diavolo's dad was still up and about. Hes also the most powerful seeing as he can manipulate time and reality. My question is how Diavolo keeps him from doing so.

On that note, i do believe he has alternate reality once or twice, unbeknownst to Diavolo or anyone else.

Michael is a huge player in this game and although we don't hear from or of him often, i believe hes playing together with Diavolo on something bigger

Simeon isn't the sweet little angel we always see. He's a warrior of God, a weapon if heaven, and much like Lucifer, he would do anything for his family.

Solomon is shady af and I dont trust him at all. I do believe, especially since the newer lessons came out, that hes planning something with Diavolo.

I can see Lucifer overthrowing Diavolo at some point, most likely out of revenge. He's too smug and secretive to keep following Diavolo blindly, even if it took him a couple thousand years to figure something out

I believe God has left the OM universe, much like he did in SPN, and Michael is in charge up there

Lilith is a liar and manipulator. I dont have evidence, she just gives off that vibe in the few times we've seen her.

[commentaryvorg]

Digimon Data Squad Dub Comparison Episode 22 - The Wrath of SaberLeomon

This is a companion to my commentary on the original Japanese Digimon Savers! Reading my commentary on the original version of this episode (which you can find here) is recommended before reading this dub comparison.

Original name ~ Dubbed name

Masaru Daimon ~ Marcus Damon

Yoshino Fujieda ~ Yoshino “Yoshi” Fujieda

Tohma H. Norstein ~ Thomas H. Norstein

Ikuto Noguchi ~ Keenan Crier

Chika Daimon ~ Kristy Damon

Sayuri Daimon ~ Sarah Damon

Captain Rentarou Satsuma ~ Commander Richard Sampson

Governor Hashiba ~ Director Hashima

Mercurimon ~ Merukimon

Yukidarumon ~ Frigimon

RiseGreymon ~ RizeGreymon

[Since several characters share the same name between the original and the dub, quotes from the dub will always be in italics, while quotes from the original will not, in order to distinguish them.]

Gotsumon’s doing the recap today! It’s a nice twist having an antagonist do one.

Recap Gotsumon:  “So many of us Digimon begged Merukimon to lead an all-out attack on the human world…”

Uhh, it was kinda just him and SaberLeomon, pretty much, and I wouldn’t call what SaberLeomon did “begging”. SaberLeomon said he had other Digimon agreeing with his sentiments, but they never did any of the asking for this in-person, so this is really a misleading description of what happened. I suppose it could be that that’s the point, and Gotsumon is exaggerating; that is the sort of thing he’d do.

Recap Gotsumon: “What kinda tricks do these humans have in store for us now?!”

He adds this at the end after recapping how Kurata’s Digital Gate pulled his army back to the Digital World. I kinda like the bonus perspective it adds: that for the Digimon side, it’s deeply worrying to see that humans have this kind of technology.

Gaomon of all people reads out the episode title, for some reason. He barely has any significance in this episode.

Falcomon still sounds like Ikuto’s concerned dad and this is still Incorrect and not remotely how he should sound, weekly reminder.

Falcomon:  “Ikuto, aren’t you hungry?”

~~~~~

Falcomon:  “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

This reads less like he’s concerned about Ikuto not eating and more like he’s just… bothered by his own hunger but feels like he isn’t allowed to eat if Keenan isn’t doing so with him?

Kudamon: “I’m completely astounded. It really is a Digi-Gate.”

This is them reviewing footage of the Gate at HQ, probably like the morning after it happened. Maybe Kudamon was astounded at the time it opened, but it feels weird and awkward for him to express that now.

Thomas:  “To instantly open a Digital Gate in the wild like that takes an amazing ability.”

The way he words this, he almost makes it sound like opening a Digital Gate at will is someone’s superpower or something, rather than that it’s the result of some kind of high-level technology like he’s presumably supposed to mean.

Masaru:  “Wasn’t me.”

Agumon:  “Yeah… Aniki couldn’t have done it.”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Does it matter?”

Agumon: “Mm-hmm. We won either way!”

Marcus not being bothered with the (actually quite important) logistical mysteries is very him, but I do somewhat miss the sheer dorkiness of him imagining anyone might ever assume it was him. Agumon’s line is also different… but also still in character of him to be that cocky about their chances of winning without the bail-out. (They would not have won.)

Kurata:  “Something to be really worried about, huh?”

~~~~~

Kurata: “Wow, so many problems, hm-hmm.”

Dub-Kurata is already sounding condescending in his very first line, rather than at least trying to put up a pretence of being concerned about Ikuto.

Kurata:  “The first solid sample that was born within DATS…”

~~~~

Kurata:  “I mean, wow, the first specimen born inside DATS HQ.”

“Specimen” is slightly less Extremely Concerning than “solid sample” but still gets across the same vibe the original was going for in a somewhat more subtle way. It may just be a different direct translation of the Japanese word than what the subs used, but either way, the point is that I appreciate they picked up on the significance of him using such a term and kept it.

Kurata: “And you can Digivolve to Ultimate-level, just amazing! And you love fried eggs!”

Worded this way, and with his tone, it sounds weirdly like he finds the fried eggs thing to be just as amazing as the evolution level thing. Though considering he really isn’t as amazed as he pretends to be, perhaps it’s fair that this’d sound strange.

(Yes, Ultimate-level is correct, in the dub. I’ve been trying to avoid mentioning it as much as possible to minimise confusion, but the dub name for the original’s Perfect-level is “Ultimate-level”, while the dub name for the original’s Ultimate-level is “Mega-level” instead. This is not at all inconvenient for anyone trying to follow Digimon media in both English and Japanese at the same time.)

Kurata:  “Oh… we were lucky that it opened properly. Who knows what would have happened if I’d failed.”

~~~~~

Kurata: “Well, I’m just lucky it opened at all. And I can’t really take credit for luck.”

The dub’s version missed out on a bit of Kurata subtly stroking his own ego while pretending to be modest, in how he lingered on the idea of how screwed everyone would have been if he hadn’t helped.

Hashiba:  “I was surprised to learn that *you* were Daimon Masaru-kun. Kurata-kun told me all about it.”

~~~~~

Hashima: “Oh, and you must be our new recruit, Marcus Damon. Kurata told me that you’d joined.”

Hashima, you’ve spoken to him before. And why would Kurata have been the one to simply tell him the fact that Marcus joined DATS? Surely that’d have been Sampson, if anyone. The dub is failing to realise that this remark of Hashiba’s was not meant to be “oh hey, you’re new”, but rather “oh hey, I’ve seen you before but I didn’t realise that you’re Suguru’s son”, because Kurata had just recently informed him of that part.

Kurata:  “Daimon Masaru-kun, you’ve grown so big. You’re looking more and more like your father.”

~~~~~

Kurata: “You’ve gotten so big, Marcus! You’re almost all grown up now. I’ll have to restrain myself from pinching your cheeks.”

Dub-Kurata is implying he actually visited the Damons when Marcus was a kid, which makes sense I guess but also makes me uncomfortable to imagine. He’s also being a lot more overtly patronising, making it perfectly natural that Marcus would make a face at this; that’s no longer really a sign that he’s picking up on something more subtly off.

(Also, if dub-Kurata had told Marcus he’s looking more like his father, that’d have been an interesting prompt to spur Marcus to make a face at for its own sake, regardless of the fact that it’s Kurata saying it, given Marcus’s slightly different dad complex.)

Kudamon:  “According to regulations, any Digimon that appear in the human world must be returned to a Digiegg first.”

~~~~~

Kudamon: “Thank you for your help, Kurata; we may not have succeeded without you. But I’m assuming that you’re here because you *want* something.”

Man, Kudamon’s tone here manages to sound really savage and passive-aggressively unimpressed with Kurata acting like he’s so helpful. I approve. This comes in place of reminding us of the Digiegg rule, but I suppose that’s not the most important thing to bring up here anyway.

Kurata: “That’s so like you, Kudamon. You just get right to the point, as always.”

Kurata’s response is also appropriately passive-aggressive, but… should he actually be as familiar with Kudamon as this is implying he is? He said it’d been a while since he’d seen Sampson, but apparently, in the dub at least, not so long of a while that it was before Kudamon was around. I’m not sure that’s necessarily the case in the original.

Kurata:  “Anyway, what I’d like to talk about is… Ikuto-kun. Was that his name?”

~~~~~

Kurata: “Yes, I am here for something. For Falcomon. …And Keenan.”

I am Alarmed at the fact that he mentioned Falcomon first and added Keenan almost like an afterthought… and yet that would also kind of make an awfully worrying amount of sense, aaaa.

Kurata:  “I hear he was raised in the Digital World, and I’m very interested in meeting him.”

~~~~~

Kurata: “That boy is such an interesting specimen, having been raised in the Digital World.”

It is also alarming and yet appropriate that he’d think of Keenan as a “specimen” too. Maybe him using that word is also because he’s still half-thinking about Falcomon, despite who he’s nominally talking about. Some good changes here. Added subtlety?!

Kurata:  “Could you give me custody over him?”

~~~~~

Kurata: “I’d love to have the opportunity to study him.”

…Okay, I just said that, but this here is significantly less subtle. You’d think Kurata would not want to be nearly as obvious with this.

This then makes Marcus’s “What?!” of protest over it potentially more about Kurata’s wording ringing alarm bells rather than anything about Kurata taking custody of him in general.

Hashiba:  “The original plan was to have him looked after by us anyway. I’ll give you my permission.”

~~~~~

Hashima: “Well, our original plan was for DATS to look after him anyway. I approve.”

In the dub, this would be a plan that should have nothing to do with Kurata, because Kurata isn’t a member of DATS. Originally what Hashiba was saying here was having the Ministry look after him, because Hashiba and Kurata were both affiliated with the Ministry of Confidentiality, not DATS. Yet another example of things making a whole lot less sense because the dub ignorantly changed Hashima’s job to being the Director of DATS when he’s not supposed to be.

(There is no Ministry of Confidentiality in the dub at all, so Kurata’s current affiliation in the dub is… ??? who the hell knows, but presumably not anything that would make DATS ever want to randomly give him custody over Keenan.)

Masaru:  “Hang on! You haven’t even asked Ikuto if he’d agree!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Hey, hold on! This is a human being you’re talking about!”

I might have been a little sad that Marcus’s focus is less on what Keenan wants, but on the other hand, this change is quite appropriate for the greater emphasis dub-Kurata put on the “specimen” and “study” comments, so I guess it works in the new context.

Ikuto:  “Everyone would be better off without me!”

~~~~~

Keenan:  “Me no belong here! Better if me go home!”

Home, as in the Digital World? That place that he’s supposed to have also decided he doesn’t belong in? (And yet, that place that he was “sacrificing” himself into simply being taken back to, which Marcus and Falcomon are supposed to have talked him out of? Yeah, that was still a really Bad Call on the dubbers’ part last episode.)

Masaru:  “Captain! That’s the way it is!”

Kudamon:  “*What’s* the way it is?”

~~~~~

Marcus:  “Ya hear that?! Ya got anything to say?!”

Kudamon: “Well, Director?”

I am sad at the loss of Kudamon’s bewildered echoing of Masaru’s line. Dub-Kudamon doesn’t seem caught off-guard by Marcus abruptly declaring he’ll take this kid home at all.

Sampson: “Taking care of Keenan is one of our responsibilities, and so it’s up to us how we handle it.”

[Hashima grimaces]

Kurata: “Well, he does have a point. This is their jurisdiction, after all.”

And yet, Hashima is also a member of DATS with that same jurisdiction, and he outranks Sampson as a member of DATS, so no, it should still be Hashima’s final decision in this situation. The dub continues to have done effed up by changing this guy’s job.

Marcus: “That’s what I’m talkin’ about!”

Thomas: “You’ve never talked about that.”

It’s a somewhat literal way to have Thomas be affectionately exasperated by Marcus’s enthusiasm… but to be fair I suppose Marcus never has actually talked about any of these DATS politics, has he.

Chika:  “Hurry and take a bath! For crying out loud…”

~~~~~

Kristy: “Look, you’ll be happier once you’re not so smelly. Trust me. We’ll *all* be happier.”

Kristy continues to be sassier than her original counterpart.

There are two splashes as Falcomon is flung into the water, but we do not see a naked Keenan being flung in there at all. (He was curled up in such a way as to not show anything, but I guess the dub decided that was still too risqué.)

Agumon:  “Aniki? Hurry and get in.”

Masaru:  “Get in where?!”

~~~~~

Agumon: “Well? Get in!”

Marcus: “Where am I supposed to fit?”

The wording of Marcus’s line doesn’t quite get across the same kind of comedic exasperation as what the subs went with, at least in my opinion (maybe it’s the way Masaru mirrored Agumon’s wording). There’s also a kind of echoey sound effect on Masaru’s line in the original that kind of helps drive home the silliness that isn’t there in the dub.

Masaru:  “This guy is called Ikuto. The other one is called Bird.”

Ikuto & Falcomon: “It’s Falcomon!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Here’s Keenan and… Falcomon, his pet.”

Keenan & Falcomon: “His what?!”

Marcus never called Falcomon “bird” in the dub, so they had to use a different joke here. Though he did call Falcomon a few odd things such as “Owlboy” and “Falco-dude” in episode 16; they could always have brought one of those back.

Chika:  “Oh, they talked.”

~~~~~

Kristy: “Yeah. We met.”

Kristy’s line doesn’t imply that this is the first time they’ve said anything since coming here, which suggested why Masaru might have made a jab at Falcomon to try and coax them to speak. Instead, she sounds put-out, like she’s referring to Falcomon specifically and is still kinda bitter about the time he broke into her room and threatened her. The silent implication with Chika at least is that she’d put that behind her.

Sarah: “Call me ‘Mom’.”

Marcus: “‘Mom’?!”

Hey, Marcus, it’s better than them calling her “Sarah” like Agumon does?

This is dub-specific and really ought to be less throwaway than it is, because how would Keenan feel about having another human whom he’s supposed to think of as a “mother”, to the point of calling her that?

Everyone:  “Thanks for the— FOOD!”

~~~~~

Everyone: “Thanks for the food!”

The original has Masaru and Agumon begin enthusiastically digging in on the last syllable itself, as if they’re so excited to start eating that they do so the absolute split second they’ve technically finished saying the words. The dub doesn’t replicate that effect and instead has a small pause between the words and the commencement of nomming, which is a little bit less fun. Probably because lip-flap.

Chika:  “If you don’t hurry, there’ll be nothing left to eat.”

[…]

Sayuri:  “If you don’t hurry, there’ll be nothing left to eat.”

~~~~~

Kristy: “Don’t get too close, or you’ll lose an arm.”

[…]

Sarah: “Don’t worry, Kristy, I made a secret second dinner for us.”

Looks like the dub missed that this was a deliberate comedic echoing, first Chika saying it to Ikuto and Falcomon, and then Sayuri saying it to Chika as the boy and his bird turn out to be exactly as ravenous as Masaru and Agumon.

Agumon:  “It fell!”

Marcus & Falcomon: “That means… you lose!”

Calling it losing is a bit much, especially with the harsh tone they have for it. Clearly the game keeps going even if you mess up, and you’ll get to have another try next time your turn comes around; that red patch on Marcus’s forehead is definitely from more than just the one poke.

The BGM here is also really dramatic and ominous, which I understand is supposed to be the point, but it feels like the ominousness is maybe dialled up just a little too much? I’m not sure the point of this scene is supposed to be that they’re making Keenan feel genuinely bad.

Marcus: “Penalty flick on the forehead! And you can’t run away, or you get another one!”

An added rule to the forehead-flicking. It does feel like the kind of rule kids would add in a game like this.

Kristy is edited (very lazily) to have a towel around her chest in a shot of her upper body from the back as she attempts to get in the bath. I guess that was necessary to appease the censors.

Chika:  “They drained all of the hot water!”

~~~~~

Kristy: “You guys ate my rubber ducky!”

If Agumon really did that (because let’s be real, the culprit would be Agumon), I’m surprised it only happened now and didn’t happen sometime way sooner. This is also Kristy having a more childish-leaning frustration with the boys – I kinda like how Chika was concerned about something practical, presenting her as more mature than those dorks.

Chika:  “They’re all so childish…”

~~~~~

Kristy: “What a bunch of doofs!”

This line actually came before the previous line in the original, but in the dub the shots were edited to put it after. I guess the dubbers decided it fit their changed joke better to have it that way around. Kristy is again not showing herself to be the more mature one in some ways.

There’s a shot of a running bath tap overlaid with Sarah talking to Kristy as they sit together, except the shot makes less sense when we haven’t been given the context that her bathwater was drained and she’s having to wait for it to fill up again. Losing her rubber ducky was not cause for her to postpone the bath.

Chika:  “The only thing Masaru-niichan ever did in the past was pick fights.”

~~~~~

Kristy:  “At least Marcus isn’t fighting as much…”

[cut to Marcus]

Marcus: “Raaaaa! Pillow fight!”

The original line of Chika’s was also overlaid a little with the pillow fight, but not in such a direct way that it ever occurred to me that Masaru was technically proving her words wrong as she spoke. The more deliberate juxtaposition in the dub gives it a fun comedic effect.

At the same time, I’m not sure Kristy’s version of the line works as well, because, well, Marcus still is fighting lots – just in more productive ways.

Sayuri:  “Yes. The way he runs about wildly every day hasn’t changed, though.”

~~~~~

Sarah: “Yes, he’s channeling his energy into more productive pursuits. …Well, not tonight, necessarily.”

What is Sarah talking about? The kind of thing Marcus has been doing tonight is precisely a more productive use of his energy! It’s not just about how his fights have now been against Digimon that need to be fought; it’s also about how he’s had a lot more friendship in his life and is genuinely happier than when he’d go around picking fights with any random punk who’d accept. And now he’s sharing that friendship energy with Keenan, too! This is the most productive thing he could be doing with all that energy of his right now, and that’s supposed to be the whole point of what his mom and sister are remarking on in this scene.

At least this scene’s BGM is Probably Marcus’s Theme: Heartwarming Piano Edition, which is very appropriate and I approve.

Ikuto:  “You hit me!”

Masaru:  “Try to get me!”

~~~~~

Keenan:  “Me get you for that!”

Marcus: “You gotta catch me first!”

In the original, there was this sense that Ikuto still needed a little bit of coaxing from Masaru to get him into the game and trying to retaliate – but in the dub, it seems like Keenan has already decided on his own that he wants to get Marcus back.

SaberLeomon: “…and killed our companions!”

~~~~~

SaberLeomon: “What they did was unforgivable.”

SaberLeomon skirts around directly mentioning murder in the dub, as usual, but in a way that sounds natural and still gets across what happened, given the accompanying shots of Digimon being disintegrated. I was bracing myself for him to say they were “deleted” or something and was glad to be spared from that.

Keenan: “Why me stay up so late…?”

I’m not entirely sure Keenan should have a concept of “staying up late”, given that he spend most of his childhood without a direct parent and therefore without a bedtime. He should be used to the idea of just going to sleep whenever he feels like it and not see it as a bad thing.

(I do approve of the notion that he and Marcus and their partners stayed up way too late playing dorky games with each other, though. They would.)

In the part where he sees Sarah as Frigimon, his voice doesn’t shift to a younger-sounding one like Ikuto’s did, making it feel slightly more off that he actually bought it was her for a second. The more grown-up Keenan whose voice we hear here knows full well that Frigimon is dead, after all.

Masaru:  “What? You need to use the restroom too?”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Man! Is that how you say good morning?!”

When Keenan runs away from Sarah in tears and crashes into Marcus, Marcus is a lot more annoyed about it. It’s kinda fair that he’s half asleep and that he doesn’t realise Keenan’s upset, but, ehhh.

Masaru:  “Why?! You can stay here!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Keenan, you just can’t run off, it’s dangerous!”

Kinda odd that Marcus would be worrying about Keenan being in danger if he ran off on his own, when he did just fine running around alone in an unfamiliar city. The more meaningful point is why he wants to leave when he’s welcome here; Masaru was probably worried that he still feels like he doesn’t belong.

Marcus: “You’re not thinkin’ of givin’ yourself up to those guys again, are you?”

Yeah, “giving himself up” as in “being taken back to the Digital World”, what a terrible sacrifice that we can’t let him do. Eh, this line doesn’t make that whole thing any worse than the last episode already made it, and it’s vague enough about it that we can try and forget last episode happened and pretend it was a proper self-sacrifice.

Masaru:  “Are you stupid?”

Ikuto:  “I’m not stupid!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Don’t be ridiculous!”

Keenan:  “Me no joking!”

This is in response to Keenan saying that everything is his fault, and something about that doesn’t quite fit with “not joking”. You don’t go “no, really, guys, I’m not joking when I say everything’s all my fault”, at least not when it’s really a mistaken assumption born of self-loathing.

Masaru:  “Was last night’s meal good?”

~~~~~

Marcus: “You can’t blame yourself for what other people do!”

I approve of Marcus having even more lines reassuring Keenan than Masaru did, but one awkward thing is that this line happens over a shot of Sarah in which her eyes widen in response to his words. With Sayuri, that made sense, because she was surprised at the sudden change of subject to her hospitality. With Sarah, it just reads as weird that she’s reacting to this statement of Marcus’s in particular.

The silent “dialogue” in which Marcus stares at Keenan until he gets him to nod then instead serves as him trying to get Keenan to understand and agree with the idea that this isn’t his fault, rather than getting him to admit he enjoyed the meal. Which… yeah, that still works fine, I think.

Masaru:  “Listen. Normally we’d be having more of that good food for breakfast right now, but now we have to throw everything down and move out.”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Listen, normally, we could sit down and talk about all of this over a nice breakfast, but thanks to that no-good SaberLeomon, we have to rush out and jump into battle.”

As much as I somewhat appreciate Marcus making more of a thing about persuading Keenan this stuff isn’t his fault, it is… kind of un-Masaru of him to approach it this way? He’s making this a lot about talking about Keenan’s problems, which isn’t an approach Masaru would ever think to consciously take.

Masaru said his bit about why it obviously wasn’t Ikuto’s fault, and as far as he saw it, that was the end of it. He’s not one for talking, he’s one for action. Masaru shifting the focus to food earlier and making it all about the breakfast rather than any kind of talking than this was still him trying to help, in a way – just a very distinctively Masaru way that kept the focus on the simple things.

Masaru:  “All because of that whatever-it-was-called Digimon! Anyone who doesn’t let a guy eat must be served *justice*!

~~~~~

Marcus: “Although that’s fine by me! ‘Cause anyone who keeps a guy from his breakfast deserves a heaping helping of justice, Marcus-style!”

The dub does get back on track with the dorky breakfast-justice in the end, though, which is good.

Miki:  “Masaru… Stop wasting time saying weird things, just hurry up and move!”

~~~~~

Miki: “Ahem. Are you going to keep talking all day, Marcus, or are you going to get a move on?”

This reads like Miki isn’t exasperated at Marcus having just said something supremely ridiculous, but at him… having talked a lot, in general? It is weird that the dub of this scene is adding more emphasis on Marcus talking. That is not supposed to be his thing. And heck, most of his talking in this scene has been reassuring Keenan, which is a good use of words!

Keenan: “But… SaberLeomon can’t be defeated!”

Marcus: “Well, we’ll never know that unless we try. You can’t let fear stop you from doing what you need to do.”

Also good advice, but, uh, this implies Marcus himself is frequently consciously afraid of his fights and yet chooses to face that fear anyway? Not that I don’t love characters who do that, but… that’s very decidedly not Masaru, or Marcus. He’s the kind of guy who doesn’t feel fear at these ridiculous odds – or rather, when he maybe sometimes does, he suppresses it firmly under his excitement and reckless confidence rather than confronting it directly. He’s not a character who should be saying something like this.

Masaru:  “I’m going.”

Chika:  “Dressed like that?”

Masaru:  “Say that sooner.”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Alright, I’m going now.”

Kristy:  “In pyjamas?”

Marcus: “Oh! Right.”

Part of the comedy of this moment in the original is that Masaru responds to Chika’s line in exactly the same dead-serious tone he had in his first line. Marcus also says the first line in a very serious, grim tone… but instead, his second line has him snap out of it and back into dork-mode. I think it’s slightly less funny that way? It’s hard to be sure. Still good, though.

Falcomon:  “I’ll have the same as Ikuto!”

~~~~~

Falcomon: “Whatever you make, just make seconds!”

Falcomon’s line in the dub reads more like he’s saying “I love your food, so make sure there’s plenty for me”, or maybe short-cutting Keenan’s indecisiveness by implying Sarah should simply make fried egg curry for all of them. Although it could be him saying he wants the same as Keenan, technically, the fact that he’s not making that his main point loses the adorableness of the original line, where Falcomon was clearly trying to show that he’s always on Ikuto’s side and supporting him, even in his food choices.

SaberLeomon: “Digimon who team up with humans… what pathetic idiots.”

~~~~~

SaberLeomon: “How pathetic you Digimon are. I almost feel sorry for you.”

Feels a bit off for SaberLeomon to be calling fellow Digimon pathetic just by itself, if he’s not making the point that he thinks they’re pathetic because they’re teamed up with humans.

Masaru:  “Don’t think you can get away with whatever you want on my turf, you bastard!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Not gonna happen! That’s right, because once I’m on the job, nothin’ stops me!”

Marcus’s badass line heralding his arrival is less street-fightery. Probably on purpose, because the dub likes to try and tone down his vague juvenile-delinquent vibes whenever they can.

(Then again, he did have that thing in episode 1 about driving other thugs off his “training ground”. I guess it really was just the one park that he counts as that and not the rest of the city.)

The Full Charge evolution theme is still a bop, just so you know. They used it for RizeGreymon’s evolution out of the usual contractual obligation, but then brought it to a close very quickly as soon as he was done evolving, which I appreciate, because most of this fight is not very triumphant or victorious and doesn’t deserve the music, as much as I like it.

SaberLeomon: “Ikuto? I see… I’ve heard of you.”

This original line gets replaced with silence in the dub, for reasons I’m about to go into. What it also means is that there’s no indication that SaberLeomon has heard of Keenan in the dub at all.

SaberLeomon: “The fact remains that you are a human. You wouldn’t understand the Digimon’s suffering.”

~~~~~

SaberLeomon: (Who is this pipsqueak to speak to me this way? He’s a human himself. He can’t possibly understand.)

Given that SaberLeomon apparently hasn’t heard of Keenan in the dub, he’s being less prejudiced to think this, because some random human from the human world, which he’s bound to be assuming Keenan is, would have no way to understand what Digimon have been through.

And no, those brackets aren’t a mistake. This line is given an echoing effect that denotes it being thoughts and not out-loud speech. Keenan didn’t hear this.

The reason for this? Because, although in earlier scenes (and earlier in this fight scene), SaberLeomon moved his mouth to talk, during this part, he doesn’t. In the original, he’s still speaking out loud anyway, and this is an animation inconsistency – perhaps different animators were working on different scenes and didn’t communicate about this, or something. The dub is seeing fit to try and fix that mistake by making all of SaberLeomon’s dialogue here into thoughts.

Except, the thing is, throughout all the times I’d watched this episode in Japanese before seeing the dub, I didn’t even notice this inconsistency at all! There are plenty of Digimon who have mouths that look movable and yet don’t move them when they speak, so there’s nothing that seems odd about SaberLeomon not moving his mouth to talk in and of itself. And it’s easy to forget that he did move it in earlier scenes, because that’s not something you consciously pay attention to anyway.

Really, it’s such a minor mistake that the dub didn’t need to fix this. There’ve been plenty of other small mistakes in the original that the dub hasn’t bothered to fix. (See: Ikuto’s broken grammar which doesn’t make any sense being broken.)

So while I appreciate the dub actually picking up on a mistake in the original and doing something about it, I’m not sure this is actually the best choice for the episode? For one thing, it feels really strange to suddenly be seeing inside the head of this really pretty minor antagonist character who’s about to permanently die.

And to some extent, it wouldn’t matter that much that SaberLeomon doesn’t say this stuff out loud because nobody else here cared much about what he had to say anyway – but not entirely, because this line here matters to Ikuto. In fact, he’s going to have a flashback to this line at one point next episode, which is going to be very awkward for the dub when it’s not something Keenan actually heard.

Ikuto:  “You’re wrong!”

~~~~~

Keenan: “Stop!”

Because he didn’t hear what SaberLeomon was only thinking about him, Keenan can’t actually respond to that and instead just yells at him to stop, again, after getting silence for a few moments. His whole plea to the big lion-mon to stop attacking must have sounded rather awkward from the perspective of anyone not inside SaberLeomon’s head, given how he was just yelling and getting nothing back.

Masaru:  “Idiot! Worry more about breakfast!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Hey. You did great, kid, just leave the rest to me.”

The dub writers really did not get the whole thing with Masaru making this straightforwardly about food, did they. They didn’t understand that it was a distinctive Masaru thing of focusing on the simple things rather than getting too wrapped up in the bigger picture, which was still helping Ikuto in his own way, so they did what they felt was improving it. Like, I’m not going to say no to them making Marcus more caring, because boy is that rare compared to the exact opposite, but I’m sad that it can only come at the expense of Masaru being very distinctively straightforwardly Masaru.

Masaru:  “I’ve decided, you are going down!”

SaberLeomon: “You think you can take me on, bastard?”

Masaru:  “Try me and see!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “That is it! It’s *really* fightin’ time now!”

[SaberLeomon growls threateningly]

Marcus: “You don’t scare me!”

Because SaberLeomon is not allowed to talk with his mouth closed in the dub, he doesn’t get to actually have some back-and-forth trash-talk with Marcus either. Honestly, it reads as kind of strange, when he was speaking to his opponents earlier in the fight, for him to suddenly be completely wordless.

(Oh hey, remember how Marcus is in fact extremely the sort of character to insist to himself that he’s not scared, even when he might be? So what on earth was that line earlier implying he’s consciously aware of his fear all the time?)

The crosshair over SaberLeomon’s forehead as the strange Digimon sizes him up in its POV is edited out. Apparently that was too much like assassination imagery for the censors or something.

SaberLeomon: (Aggghh… What did you do to me?)

I suppose there’s something to be said for seeing directly into the thoughts of the first Digimon to actually outright die onscreen. We do get that one shot from SaberLeomon’s POV as his vision goes pixelated, so in that sense we had already briefly seen inside his head, even in the original. It could be argued that this helps get across an even starker sense of how horrible being shot by one of those things feels and that this isn’t right and shouldn’t be happening. Not that that’s on purpose or the reason the dubbers did this, or anything.

Masaru:  “Don’t look around when you’re in the middle of a fight!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “I’ll thank that thing later, but right now, I’ve gotta win this fight!”

Marcus’s line explicitly makes him aware that the mysterious Digimon actively helped him by weakening SaberLeomon. For Masaru, it kind of read like he didn’t properly pick up on the fact that that Digimon was the reason SaberLeomon was acting so distracted, because he was too tunnel-visioned into just trying to win the fight.

(Oh boy, you will not be thanking that thing later, Marcus. Not one bit.)

Masaru:  “SaberLeomon! Feel Ikuto’s pain!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “This one’s for Keenan!”

Marcus is not making any specific attempt to get across that Keenan has suffered just like the Digimon have with his punch here, mostly because SaberLeomon didn’t audibly shoot Keenan down, and so Marcus doesn’t know he needs to stand up for him in this way. (But also probably in part because this concept of communicating feelings through fists is not a thing that Marcus is going to embody in any way in the rest of the series, even as Masaru will increasingly begin to do so.)

RizeGreymon: “Boss… You are amazing…!”

The little moments in this fight of RizeGreymon getting to be a character while in an evolved form hit slightly less well, because RizeGreymon’s voice is just an Obligatory Growly Evolved Digimon Voice, and it’s hard to connect that to Agumon. RiseGreymon’s Japanese voice isn’t the same as Agumon’s either, but it’s not unnecessarily growly and at least sounds like a person. You can kind of imagine it being a more mature Agumon; it’s probably Agumon’s VA just using his normal voice or thereabouts.

SaberLeomon: “Filthy… Filthy humans!!”

~~~~~

SaberLeomon: (No! No! I cannot be defeateeeed!)

SaberLeomon’s dying words (uh, thoughts) in the dub are just some pretty cheesy villain talk. His last words in the original were a lot more relevant – he had every reason to die cursing and hating humanity, given that he was being actually outright murdered by humans, just like so many of his fellow Digimon were.

Kurata: “Wow. Very impressive. I have never seen such a display of strength and teamwork before.”

Kurata’s voice doesn’t sound very genuinely impressed at all. It’s possible he was also that way in the original, and I just couldn’t pick it up from his voice because I’m not fluent.

Kurata:  “If it hadn’t provided an opening for attack, things could have become dangerous.”

~~~~~

Kurata:  “I mean, none of you had made even a tiny little dent in SaberLeomon until it came along.”

Kurata’s making even more of a point of how useless DATS are compared to hi – ahem, that Digimon in the dub.

Kurata:  “In any case, this is quite troublesome. It seems the Digimon are fully regarding us humans as their enemy.”

~~~~~

Kurata: “Perhaps we’re not even taking the right approach at all. I mean, many if not most Digimon see humans as their sworn enemies.”

Dub-Kurata seems to be making this less about SaberLeomon specifically having “proven” that most/all Digimon are out for human blood, and more like that was just already obviously the case. Which I don’t think is quite how it should be, because I feel like this SaberLeomon incident is the exact kind of thing Kurata was waiting for to push human paranoia over the edge and get his chance. It doesn’t work quite as well if it reads like he was ready to do his thing anyway, SaberLeomon or not.

Kurata:  “Don’t you agree, Doctor Tohma?”

~~~~~

Kurata: “Wouldn’t you agree it’s a problem that needs taking care of… Thomas?”

Without the “Doctor”, this doesn’t have quite the same impact to it. Basically nobody ever bothers to refer to Tohma by his title (and he prefers it that way), so having Kurata suddenly do so out of nowhere implies a few things about the way he sees him and feels subtly threatening.

Keenan:  “No talk! … Eating!”

Keenan’s broken grammar kind of helps with the comedic effect as he enthusiastically digs into the egg curry. Or maybe it’s just that this line reminds me of that one meme. No talk, only eat.

The long shot of Masaru in the shower is replaced with a shot of the bathroom door over Marcus’s line. The dub removing fanservice is the only part of its censorship that I can approve of, even if this one doesn’t feel quite as gratuitous as a lot of the other bits.

Overall differences

This one’s not too majorly different overall, but there’s a lot of small subtle things.

Kurata’s introduction makes his intentions towards Keenan – and Falcomon – a little bit implicitly creepier. They were even doing this in a decently subtle way at first, until they weren’t, but still, I appreciate the thought behind such a change.

Finally here is an episode in which Marcus comes off as appropriately caring and brotherly towards Keenan, like he’s been supposed to be since basically episode 17 and the dub has been consistently ruining. Probably the reason they don’t ruin it in this episode is less by any sort of judgement and more because Masaru’s brotherliness is finally overt enough to be right there in the animation and the plot of the episode. The dub couldn’t mess that up no matter how much they might have wanted to.

They still do water down a few fun Masaru bits, though, of course. The conversation where Chika and Sayuri discuss Masaru being better off since he met Agumon misses the point somewhat, in that it implies the pillow-fighting with Keenan is an example of the bad kind of fighting he used to do in the past, instead of very much an example of the healthier and more productive outlet for his energy he’s found nowadays. The dubbers also clearly don’t understand the point of Masaru putting such an emphasis on breakfast, which is him being good and straightforward and helping Ikuto focus on the simple things instead of all of his issues about humans versus Digimon, so there’s less of that in the dub. And there’s that one line which implies that Marcus is always making a conscious choice to overcome his fear in order to fight, which is very decidedly not him.

Probably the most noticeable change and Weird Thing about this episode is how most of SaberLeomon’s dialogue during the fight becomes his inner thoughts. This is a strange thing to do for a relatively minor villain, it makes the exchanges between him and Keenan/Marcus less interesting because they’re not actually responding to him, and it’s going to cause an outright inconsistency next episode with a line Ikuto will flash back to. The dub did it for the sake of lip-flap consistency, but I really think it would have been better for the story for them to just not, and leave the lip-flap issue as it was. Apparently the lip-flap consistency people care more about doing their job well than any of the people on the actual writing team in this dub, which doesn’t surprise me.

[rescuestudies]

types of people: my fire station

hey! it seems that you guys love the types of people memes I make so here’s another one! (I LOVE MY STATION SO MUCH...these are jokes!)

Captain: screams into the void, “beds made by 10″, “god dammit Jordan!”, edgy but actually a softie, so much salt, EMS without the cert, the color red, “yeet!”, soft spot for T, training is his jam, perfect balance of fun and stern, lowkey stressed out, hates writing reports, will be your biggest fan, “there was fucking Kerosene dude!”, managing is his happy place despite how not fun it is, probably has a planner somewhere 

Lt. : chill dad, awful dad jokes followed by dorky laughter, Steelers fan til death, gives T a hard time, soft spot for Jordan, kitchen cleaning master, only person who likes pumping water, did i mention he’s a dad, loves sharing his knowledge of the fire service, gives gentle reminders to be kind to yourself, will support you til the end, mini golf legend, if puppies were people he’d be a golden retriever, devoted to his family and wife, will preach to you about how life takes time 

Junior Mint: loves cats to a fault, will send you memes to make you feel better, plays too many PC games, gentle roasts to make the mood lighter, always down for some training, knows so much to be so young, a bright future ahead of him, taking things a day at a time, wings it 90% of the time and still does great, loves milk more than anything, epic bruh moment, picks on T for fun, just trying to make his life a good one 

Richy Rich: will kill you if you call him that, emo but in an adult way, gaming but make it indie, gives great advice followed by eh advice, the most neutral human being ever, so smart but such a smartass, takes training very seriously (but in a fun way), tries not to lose his patience with people but eventually cracks, the confidant friend everyone goes to but doesn’t listen to him when he needs it, the color blue, late nights and early mornings, south park memes, has no issue fact-checking a bitch 

Caleb: star wars enthusiast, giggly smiles, taking things a day at a time, genuinely wants you to win, appreciates the little things more than most of us, dad jokes all the time, accepts his flaws and tries to fix them, motivational quotes, take on me by a-ha probably loops in his head all day, wants the simple life, would make a great dad and also public health educator, genuinely loves helping others, makes it really hard to be mad at him

Jordan: gives corgi vibes lowkey, “it’s okay, i’ll teach you”, loves sharing his knowledge, not afraid to make mistakes, warm smiles, the type of person you simply can’t hate, always upbeat, probably has cake by the ocean playing on repeat in his head, loves the kids, passionate about fire but taking his time to get where he needs to be, will be the sober friend at a party, will never make you feel unloved or alone, “what’s up goofy”

T: angry but means well, loves the fire service but refuses to settle, just wnats to help people even before she helps herself, loves devious cats and silly dogs, lowkey afraid of commitment, definitely uses angst as a defense mechanism, will talk your head off about candles or healthcare inequalities, afraid of being wrong sometimes, that friend that will put you first, screams into the void, “Did my back hurt your knife?”, has no idea how to teach things without getting frustrated, that annoys her bc she really wants to train others, would die for her captain, hates people that underestimate women, a walking talking ass whoopin, “fuck you, i’ll do it myself” 

NASA: the smartest in the group probably, also a himbo somehow, anxious around women, *country boyyyy I love youuuuu*, dad glasses paired with dad jokes, probably the best cook on the crew aside from Lt., fills awkward silence with awkward laughter, can’t handle his wine, “what’s that supposed to mean?”, dying inside, lots of witty remarks, scribbled math equations on napkins, avoiding social situations to recharge battery, open ears and a silent mouth, keeps all your deepest secrets but still judges you lowkey, would die for anyone on his crew no matter how annoying they are, honestly a wholesome guy

YeeYee: loves ducks, probably cottagecore but add some camo, sends T some tiktoks, loves his girlfriend more than he loves life itself, hates school but went anyway, amazing teacher and sharer of information, big ole truck, unhinged chaos at any given moment, loves to play around with EMS supplies, “love me some McConaughey”, 3 black coffees followed by a scream into the hallway, “fuck my quiz!”, random road rage videos, on a chill scale, he’s the most chill, gets more unhinged when country music plays, “look at all those chickens” 

i love my crew so much man! i hope yall enjoy!

[taetaespeaches]

bias game

I was tagged by the sweetest @oreomonsterhunter <3 thank you Nat, this was fun even if it was super hard hahaha. 

Rules : Write down your top 10 biases and answer the following questions

Kim Taehyung - BTS

Min Yoongi - BTS

Ayn Hyejin - Mamamoo

Kim Seokjin - BTS

Jeon Jungkook - BTS

Lim Jaebeom - GOT7

Kim Mingyu - SVT

Jung Wheein - Mamamoo

Park Jimin - BTS

Yoon Jeonghan - SVT

1. Between 1 and 4 who would you rather kiss?

Taehyung. Yeah. That feels right. For obvious reason, the dude quite literally owns my entire heart. 

2. Between 2 and 7 who would be your best friend?

Eeeeek this is hard bc I think I would vibe with Jin, Jungkook, Yoongi, and Mingyu soooo well!!! Hmmmm ok it’s between Jin and Yoon. Jin. I’m going with Jin. 

3. Between 5 and 10 who has the better voice?

Sorry Kookie, sorry Jaebeom, sorry Jimin... Wheein wins this one. The woman’s voice is perfection. 

4. Between 1 and 8 who is the funniest?

Oh god they’re all hilarious. Ughhhhhh Jin. Jin wins. Because he’s genuinely funny but he can also pull off the dorky dad humor and I love it. 

5. Between 6 and 9 who would you date?

All of them?? Ugh I think Mingyu is like the epitome of boyfriend material so we’ll go with him. Come here tall sweetheart :( 

6. Between 4 and 8 who is the better dancer?

Jungkook. I’m not explaining myself, it’s just Jungkook. 

7. Between 3 and 5 who would you most likely marry?

Hyejin :( my dream woman right there. I think we would be very emotionally attuned with each other. 

8. Between 1 and 7 who would you nurse when they are sick?

Not to be like oh Jungkook is a baby but hi Jungkook. 

9. Between 2 and 3 who has the better smile?

I love them both :( two of the best smiles around :( but gummy grin for the win. It’s Yoongi. Like obviously. I’m obsessed with his smile.

10. Between 6 and 8 who would you vacation with?

This is so hard they would all be so fun! Probably Jaebeom because I think we would like similar activities. 

Tagging: @jiminmochis, @yoongiandthebiaswreckers, @team-wang-puppy, @yoongibuttcheeks, and everyone!!!! I’m sorry I’m tired so if I didn’t tag you, shush, yes I did. 

[catubarca]

Harry Potter Next Generation Headcanons

im bored. im full of emotions, and am rly missing the HP world... i just want to write down my headcannons for the next gen kiddos tbh.

please remember these are just my opinions? its okay if yours are different. im just bored and want to share my thoughts,,

Teddy Lupin

his name is Theodore Remus “Teddy” Lupin. it’s just what it is

I don’t care what JKR says, to me his name will always be Theodore

i can’t do this “Edward” stuff im so sorry,,,

h u f f l e p u f f

proper school uniform? never heard of it

messy hair, messy clothes

punk rock child

we’re talking like,,,at least two (2) lip piercings ok

absolutely terrible in herbology. do not leave this child alone in a greenhouse, bad things happen

fuckin hoards chocolate

its a problem

dating Victorie Weasley

random bursts of dancing

keeps a lock of hair pink for his mother

lives with the Potters, enjoys pretending to be Ginny to ground his siblings

“Lily, why aren’t you coming out of your room? Dinner’s ready?” “You said I’m grounded! You tell me!” “What? Oh, for the- THEODORE REMUS LUPIN-“

s m i r k s

effortlessly cool,,, but so so dorky,,, in a cool way

Victorie Weasley

ravenclaw!

looks a lot like her mother, Fleur, but inherited those Weasley freckles

a little confused a lot of the time

absolute sweet tooth (teddy abuses this fact a lot)

Mom Friend™

will help you with your homework

always got a book on her

super beautiful and like,,,, the absolute nicest person,,, but

cannot dance

like at all

adores Charms class

a softie you don’t want to cross

“I’m the oldest”

Dominique Weasley

inherited the Classic Weasley Red Hair™

idolises her Uncle Charlie

“I wanna save animals and work with cool dragons, just like Uncle Charlie does!”

Bill almost has a heart attack

always bringing stray animals home

(“is that a lizard in your pocket, Dominique?” “Yes! His name is Blob.” “You know how your father’s afraid of reptiles, sweetheart, you can’t bring it inside.”)

Gryffindor child

favourite class is definitely Care of Magical Creatures, she and Hagrid like to talk about proper care methods for rare creatures

perpetual dirt stains

BIG middle child vibes

doesn’t really label her sexuality… just kinda does what she wants rly

all the pets in Hogwarts love her

rumours are she’s got an innate, natural magical ability to make them all love her

(she feeds them under the table)

it’s a mystery

big advocate for animal rights

f e m i n i s t

willing to throw hands at all times

usually all smiles though

one of those people who use their whole bodies to laugh

kind of an accidental heartthrob

romcoms

Louis Weasley

looks the most like his mother

ravenclaw

absolutely filled with curiosity. always reading or talking or learning

random facts

(how do you even find that sort of information?

you don’t want to know)

coffee boy

sort of musically talented?

he and James Sirius preach the importance of skincare to all who will listen

secretly full of sass and dry wit

vry graceful and fluid

e y e r o l l

awkward smiles? can never smile properly in photos

on the ravenclaw quidditch team

Ravenclaw Prefect

(“You might be older, but I’m taller.” “Fuck off!”)

only watches High Quality™ tv shows/media

kind of a disaster, despite the gracefulness

Molly Weasley

Classic red hair

comes across as a bit uptight, like her father

I don’t care what you think. (She really cares what you think.)

E y e b r o w s

death glares

drinks like 5 cups of coffee in the morning

studies,,, like a lot

definitely a Gryffindor though

mom jeans

always ready to debate a topic. will destroy opponents.

has been trying to start a successful Debate Club for like 4 years now

naturally falls into the position of a group leader

would be a teacher’s pet, if she wasn’t ready At All Times™ to debate the relevancy of the course syllabus or outdated teaching methods

got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait in Headmistress McGonagall’s office.

(Dumbledore’s portrait was laughing, until she turned and ragged on him for a bit. Minerva thought it was absolutely hilarious, so she just let Molly go at it for a while).

full of rage towards everything, but wears a very careful mask of aloofness

to calm down, she likes painting her nails

she’s very good at it

she’s also very good at painting and art in general, weirdly enough

Lucy Weasley

G R Y F F I N D O R

adores shitty puns and has a terrible sense of humour

brown hair, not red

loves to prank people, which makes her Uncle George very proud

Percy complains about her behaviour, but makes sure he knows he’s proud too

(charming all the cauldrons in the potions classroom to scream whenever they’re stirred takes a more complex understanding of spell work than one would expect).

a pit of a punk streak

rly loves hip hop

high key drama queen

does she ever stop yelling? we’re yet to find out

average grades in terms of theory, but she’s the best in terms of applying information

especially for her pranks

has allies throughout the castle, from the portraits to the students

the bigger the prank, the better

but is a firm believer in “confuse, don’t abuse”

all her pranks are mostly harmless

is a surprising lover of older literature, like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, an influence of her sister

a bit rebellious

Fred Weasley II

name isn’t officially “the second”, but it sounds cooler

James Potter, Lucy Weasley, Molly Weasley and Fred Weasley are like the Marauders 2.0

says “squad” and “lit” unironically

niche humour

hipster vibes

avid music lover

smiley sunshine child

takes after his mother the most in looks, just like his sister

a chill type of gryffindor

plays quidditch, and is an excellent chaser, just like his mother

the absolute undisputed King™ of puppy-dog eyes

just,,,, beautiful

the True teacher’s pet

hands in his work on time,, asks lots of questions,,, likes helping students understand their work,, what a boy

can hella nyoom

runs so fast

look at him go

as you might expect, loves a good prank. always down for a laugh

Roxanne Weasley

Gryffindor and pROUD

absolute Queen tbh

was definitely Head Prefect or Gryffindor Prefect at some point

loved by the school

absolute legend

G I R L   P O W E R

infectious laughter

has a soft spot for Louis Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy

these poor disaster children,,,, they need a Mother

M O M

big mom vibes

mothers the hell out of all the first years

a feminist through and through

can be found nodding aggressively to Molly Weasley’s semi-deranged, furious ranting

YAAAASS

loves slang. uses so much slang. always up to date with trends and memes

has all the gossip

becomes a mess around pretty girls

absolute blushing, stuttering disaster around cute girls oh my god

her eye make-up game is killer

sparkly

Distinguished Lesbian

Rosie Weasley

did someone say Weasley™?

red hair and freckles and curls oh my

on the autism spectrum, has trouble socialising sometimes

hella passionate about stuff

hangs out with Scorpius and Albus, the Golden Trio 2.0

f em ini st

her jokes are the best. high quality sense of humour.

Ravenclaw

likes to read. it’s quiet in the school library, which is nice.

abysmal at herbology

surprisingly good at Care of Magical Creatures though? Animals are just,,, so much easier to deal with

overall, really good grades though

bit of a silent type, but she’s actually a riot to hang out with

actually pretty good at quidditch? She’s not on the team, and she’s not super interested in playing, but?? She’s not bad??

She can land a solid hit with a beater’s bat

(eyes you judgementally over the top of a book)

dry wit humour

will throw hands over chess

Hugo Weasley

hufflepuff

unbeatable at chess, like his dad

a lost puppy

someone please help this child

softie

kind of low-key emotional

so supportive!! and loyal!! high-key best friend material

foodie. loves food. please feed him.

takes a bit more after his dad appearance wise

loves to cook. spends lots of time with grandma Molly and his dad in the kitchen

Professor Longbottom is his favourite professor, because he’s more chilled and laidback.

other professors and classes fill him with Distress™

loves astronomy too

maths whizz, so good at arithmancy

(“uh, actually-“)

a little bossy, like his mother

is trying so hard

maybe a little too hard

a bit insecure and nervous, but so soft

please treat this child carefully and with love

James Sirius Potter

Gryffindor

L O U D

a fucking disaster child

what’d you expect, putting “James” and “Sirius” together?

DRAMATIC GASPING

flails his hands around when he talks

s t r u t s

bisexual mess, had a crush on both the Longbottom children at some point

is better than you at everything

including being a different gender

fuck you that’s why

so pretty

he’s so pretty

is thIS CHILD EVER NOT LAUGHING AT SOMETHING OH My god

laughs at everything

all the time

always

high-key emotional

badly timed finger guns

looks like a model in photos? wtf?

gets invited to Girls Nights™

wears nail polish and makeup

loves to yell at people about gender roles and defying stereotypes

TEA SIS

not on the quidditch team surprisingly enough, even though he’s pretty good

prefers to be in the stands, doing A+ commentary on the games

if he can get Fred to stop mid-air due to unbearable, suffocating laughter at least once a game it’s a win in his books

has it OUT for the hufflepuff quidditch team and no one knows why??

definitely makes puns on his name

it drives everyone insane

harry always replies he’s just making his namesake proud

that also drives everyone insane

smug lil shit

Albus Severus Potter

“It’s just Al.”

S L Y T H E R I N

will always find a way to get what he wants, eventually

“dad, why did you name me this way?”

unimpressed

sigh

hella smart. is topping at least five classes

Aunt Hermione is his favourite. She’s the fucking Mistress of Magic! All that power, the ability to make change and improve the Magical World as a whole-

sass master

the reason headmistress mcgonagall keeps a bottle of scotch under her desk at all times

the only potter child to inherit The Eyes™

absolute insomniac

kind of emo, but turns into a fucking softie around Scorpius Malfoy it’s hilarious

adverse to violence. prefers a verbal beatdown method

really tall? despite having shorties for parents??? no one saw it coming

(especially not Teddy. He’s always scared of losing his last few inches of height)

Functional Gay

he’s on the slytherin quidditch team, as a seeker

Lily Luna Potter

Gryffindor

FEMINIST

do not mess with lily luna potter

she may seem cute and sweet, but she will destroy you

inherited her father’s black hair

disaster lesbian

transfiguration is her favourite subject, by far

has no idea what she wants to do with the rest of her life.

Existential Crisis Father-Daughter Bonding Time™

do you ever sleep?

takes after Ginny the most in personality

also, kind of the most like James Fleamont Potter in personality, too?

Loves to help her brother out with pranks, laughs at him when he gets caught and she gets away with it

The only one of the Potter Children who hasn’t got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait

because she just ignores him instead

loves talking to the portraits around the castle

Super good at Quidditch, is on the team as a Chaser

Quidditch Captain at some point

adores Hagrid, but who out of the Potter children doesn’t?

Idolises Minerva McGonagall

just as oblivious as her father

Scorpius Malfoy

Actually in Ravenclaw, not Slytherin, much to many people’s surprise

abSOLUTE DADDY’S BOY

super close with his dad

Draco is just so supportive of like everything he does (unlike his father)

classic blonde malfoy looks

actually really funny?

a cuddler. loves hugs. always leeching warmth off of someone

he and Rosie sometimes finger-tip-touch which is their version of a hug, because he know’s she’s not super comfortable with touch

was basically adopted by the Weasley’s and Potter’s

James Sirius will murder for this child

booknerd, always rambling to Al and Rosie about new books coming out he’s interested in reading.

has had a crush on Albus Potter since like 1st year

always worried about making his dad proud, and keeping up the Malfoy name

sweet tooth

he’s just,, soft. just a warm, happy child. he wants love, and affection. someone tell him he’s doing okay, please.

needs,,, validation,,,

he’ll tell you out loud that he has no favourite aunts or uncles, but he secretly really likes spending time with his Uncle Ron

they had a talk, once, in like the middle of the night at a sleepover with Rosie and Al, about feeling insecure in comparison to others, and learning to be proud of yourself for your achievements

there were a few tears, but it was nice

Ron was actually the third person he told, besides his dad and Rosie, about having a crush on Al

openly a disaster romantic. trash taste in romance novels.

always welcome in the Potter-Weasley households

[elle-eedee]

dcom daddies: ranked

whats up sluts i’m here to give you the content you did NOT know you needed: a foolproof algorithmic ranking of a mild selection of disney channel dads!

beast (descendants)

hotness scale: extremely tall (over a foot taller than me! this is Very Important to the scale) and he seems to be a mere thread’s width away from Unhinged at all times, which i love. i also think it’s very sexy of him to still have such a monstrous way about himself (what with the roaring and the growling) 20something years post-curse.... makes me wonder very vividly if such energies carry to the b*droom........ *clears throat* 10/10

quality of character scale: it eternally amuses me that beast seems to learn almost Nothing over the course of this trilogy. he’s literally pro-isle the ENTIRE time jsjdndjdjd..... not great considering it puts him directly at odds with his son (and, like, with social progress) but he Does seem to act the way he does with the kingdom’s safety in mind! plus when he’s not accidentally supporting magical fascism he’s super dorky. i love his goofy dance moves 7.5/10

total score: 17.5/20...... with this score alone you can tell this system isnt rigged bc if i had it my way he’d be winning

hades (descendants)

hotness scale: i hate his party city clown wig but i’m a total sucker for guys in makeup (EVEN THOUGH A DECENT SHADE OF LIPSTICK WOULD HAVE BROUGHT HIS ENSEMBLE TOGETHER. WHY DID THEY PROPOSE IT ON THE CHARACTER DESIGN WALL IF THEY WERENT GONNA FOLLOW THROUGH!!!) and i think the fact that hes Very Sleepy and doesnt own a dog makes him my dream guy 9.5/10

quality of character scale: he literally sings a song about how cool he thinks it is that he’s a shitty dad............ but he DOES come through when his kid needs him, so that’s nice i guess. i would have liked to see more of him but i’ll settle for reading and writing intricate fan works that delve into a hypothetical personality for him that’s mainly conjecture 7.25/10

total score: 16.75/20 i wanna see him in some preppy auradon clothes

jafar (descendants)

hotness scale: i wish i had nicer things to say about this man. he just....... bears so little resemblance to the original jafar it makes me :( maybe if he was more gangly, or if he carried himself w the same potent gay energy that og jafar has? itd also help it he wasnt a racist caricature. 4.5/10

quality of character scale: again, very much a racist caricature. jafar doesnt steal!!! why would This be what he chose to do with himself! but he does seem to be, perhaps, the least bad of the core four’s parents, which counts for something i suppose. 3/10

total score: 7.5/20 sorry bud

dr facilier (descendants)

hotness scale: listen. it’s dr facilier. what am i supposed to do, NOT give him a perfect score on the sexy scale? 10/10

quality of character scale: he just loves his daughter and wants to make sure she’s getting what’s hers!!!!! his dynamic with celia makes me really happy they seem so fun! though i guess you could argue it sucks that he’d send his darling babey dohter to do errands for big mean scary hades considering that Everyone on the isle seems to quake at the sight of him. but im sure facilier only does that to ensure that celia can hold her own! 8/10

total score: 18/20 and it’d probably be higher if we’d seen more of him

mr smee (descendants)

hotness scale: not only does this man fuck, judging by the ages of his kids he fucked RECENTLY. get it baby live your truth 7/10

quality of character scale: he seems to be SO kind and sweet to his baby sons..... holding their little hands and such!!! and judging by how nervous the kids are i’d imagine it was primarily smee’s idea for them to go to auradon. extremely noble sacrifice for their benefit even though he’ll miss them 10/10!!!!!

total score: 17/20 i want to kiss his hand, if he’ll have me

zevon necrodopolous (zombies)

hotness scale: every time i look at this man i think of this post. he’s the perfect amount of frumpy for my tastes and his voice is so unique!!!!! i’d let his z-band malfunction so he could *** ** ***** * ******* **** 9/10

quality of character scale: really really cares about his kids and wants them to be safe!! he raises his voice once which im not a huge fan of but i suppose it was justified given the circumstances. also that shot of him goofing about with d*le in the end scene shows remarkable capacity for forgiveness after decades of trauma and discrimination! what a guy. 9/10

total score: 18/20 an absolute dilf!!!!!

dale (zombies)

hotness scale: looks like an uncrustable. 0/10

quality of character scale: a fucking cop. die bitch! 0/10

total score: 0/20 get in since you wanna act clown

coach jack bolton (high school musical)

hotness scale: honestly pretty young for my tastes. and i literally Always swipe left on athletes, so..... fine looking, but not for me. 5/10

quality of character scale: obviously he grows as the series progresses but i feel like jack is Always in the way of troy getting what he wants, which sucks. i like that he’s kinda goofy on his off hours with his family exactly as much as i Hate how much he yells when hes on the job. i do wish we lived in the timeline where he and miss darbus actually had that duet about their disagreements, though. 5/10

total score: 10/20 truly an Average dcom daddy

vance evans (high school musical)

hotness scale: due to personal reasons i will be having bad taste. however, this man’s fashion sense in IMPECCABLE. i mean, the colors??? the unbuttoned collar???? come on now. there is also the gratuitous use of the d-word to consider......................... anyways 7.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s hard to tell how much of his interest in furthering troy’s career is out of sincerity and how much of it is sharpay nudging him. but either way the result is a man who supports his daughter unconditionally! he could be nicer to ryan, though (plus he’s an evil capitalist) 6/10

total score: 13.5/20 i feel like he and fulton have had Relations

mr gifford (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: listen, i’m a simple guy. i see a basic-looking man pursuing age gap romance in the midst of a mid-life crisis, i support him unconditionally. also i am just Really vibing with that oversized denim shirt on him!!! there’s an egregious amount of arm hair poking out that just works. good for him! and this is a small moment but i’m very flustered over his natural Touchy Feely instinct after wen pokes out his eye... however: man has no eyebrows. 8.5/10

quality of character scale: i’m not a child of divorce so i don’t know how this stuff works, but i feel like he springs a lot of major decisions on wen? not ideal. on the other hand, we DO stan that he has sydney move in before they’re married. this is not a christian home!!!! 6/10

total score: 14.5/20 probably my favorite lemonade mouth dad, but mostly because he’s like the only one paid any attention by the narrative

mr banjaree (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: men really have beautifully sculpted noses and we just let them, huh. i’m definitely overusing the word Handsome in this list, but in this case? i’m justified. mr banjaree’s beard suits him SO well and his hair looks so soft...... and we love the implicit cleanliness of a man who wears socks in the house! 8/10

quality of character scale: i super SUPER dont agree with this man’s Smothering-Adjacent Methods (and also i know firsthand that strict parentage just drives kids to be more rebellious, lmao) but all things considered he really just wants the best for his family PLUS he’s willing to meet mo halfway at the end! :’) 6/10

total score: 14/20 the way i feel about him is the way i feel when i get crushes on pastors in that You Are Complicit In My Trauma But We’re Gonna Kiss About It way

mr delgado (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: OOOOH GLASSES! 5/10

quality of character scale: it’s sort of implied that the Wacko Energies of charlie’s family are mostly the fault of his mom so it’s cool of this man to distance himself from that. he is, of course, still complicit in Whatever The Hell Her Deal Is unless he is constantly fighting with her offscreen 6/10

total score: 11/20 would have loved to see more of him

mr yamada (lemonade mouth)

hotness scale: another chapter in the saga of unbuttoned collars! doesn’t get a lot of opportunities to show off his strengths but i appreciate that he is not the thinnest dad in town 6.5/10

quality of character scale: WOW fuck this guy. very dismissive of stella’s aspirations!!!!! i don’t like that he feels the need to talk Over her to her mom when he’s asking about her vegetarianism. dude she is right there.... however it’s a lil touching when he holds her guitar up at the end, so... 4/10?

total score: 10.5/20 *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thinks about his slightly protruding tummy in his last scene* *thi

bob duncan (good luck charlie: it’s christmas!)

hotness scale: in keeping this Specific to the feature-length xmas special, i will say that bob duncan is QUITE handsome! disappointed that he was wearing a shirt in the scene at the pool.... ill bet if this movie came out post-workout/makeover he’d have been shirtless >:/ i feel robbed... spare tummy, sir? spare tummy? additionally i love a man who rolls up his sleeves AND a man who stans kaiju movies!! also i love that he, quite literally, canonically fucks 8.5/10

quality of character scale: he’s about as charmingly incompetent as he is in the show, but the difference here is that he literally did not do a damn thing wrong! all he wanted to do was be civil with his inlaws and he frankly deserves MUCH better. its clear from his banter with the kids that he loves them very much (also i love how frequently he feels the need to jump/dive for things in this movie. silly slapstick icon) 8.75/10

total score: 17.25/20 this man’s mere presence oozes nostalgia

jerry russo (wizards of waverly place: the movie)

hotness scale: this man was MADE for me. the bottomless collection of hawaiian shirts....... the TWO tummy out scenes..........the fucked up evil thing his voice does when the kids try to steal the spellbook!!! he really has it all. also i love that he is truly just trying to have some beach intercourse 9/10

quality of character scale: i love that even when he doesn’t remember the kids he still maintains a little dadly rapport with them? the instincts...... it’s also incredibly good of him to relive his decision to give up his magic without hesitation once he realizes the severity of the situation :’0 10/10

total score: 19/20 i’ve never seen an episode of the show but im really about to start

neil morris (dadnapped)

hotness scale: handsome....... mr morris makes me feel simultaneously like a sapiosexual AND a morosexual because although he completed enough schooling to become a dentist, he also threw it away for a writing career like an absolute champ. also i find it unbelievably charming how Along For The Ride he is about the idea of being kidnapped. a man after my own heart 8.25/10

quality of character scale: this is a tricky one...... neil DOES show active concern for his daughter’s safety when push comes to shove, but he also has my least favorite type of redemption arc: “you THOUGHT i was neglecting you, but actually i was thinking about you the whole time and just never expressed it! we good?” so like. bleh. but he’s pretty mild mannered which i deeply appreciate in a man! 6.5/10

total score: 14.75/20 maybe talk to your daughter instead of writing a macgyver ripoff, dumbass

major joe mason (princess protection program)

hotness scale: prime dad bod, very believable for his line of work. also he has such a Gentle Way about himself when he’s around princesses....... i love all the hand holding when he’s escorting rosie. absolutely my type 8.75/10

quality of character scale: gosh.... where do i even BEGIN!!! his whole dynamic with carter is so ideal... i was apprehensive at first because his job would require him to be Absent a lot of the time, but upon reflection it’s clear that he’s raised carter well enough that he can totally trust her to be on her own, and also she’s only sad to see him go because she sincerely enjoys his company. everything about his profession is so noble and i love the way he can carry himself as casually or as politely as a given situation calls for. worst thing he does is say “i might have to stop calling you ‘pal’” because his daughter is wearing a pretty dress. i wish he was my dad but i’ll settle for him being my husband 9.75/10

total score: 18.5/20 i almost made a ppp self insert this morning specifically for Him

ted thompson (zapped)

hotness scale: athletes arent sexy!! this guy’s face screams The Only Websites I Know How To Use Are Facebook And Reddit and also he’s a dog person BUT he is sporting quite the tumbey if i do say so myself and for that i shall let him live. 4/10

quality of character scale: ok i know the whole point of this movie is Boys Bad but i hate men who are loud and i hate dads who get Weird about the inherent femininity of their daughters. when he calls zoey “sport” and then cringes like he’s made a mistake? dumb and unnecessary. HOWEVER all of his efforts to bond with zoey are really really sincere. like when he fixes her music box? that has NOTHING to do with the app he just Does It!!!! the movey mightve rubbed off on me a little too much but there are multiple ways to show love and just bc im not used to his way doesnt mean it has no worth! 6/10

total score: 10/20 mr thompson sir im sorry i doubted you at the start of the film

rob adams (radio rebel)

hotness scale: this man dresses 5-10 years younger than he looks and i respect that for him. but i was expecting him to be a bit more of a slimeball considering how tara talks about him in the opening scene... and you guys know how much i love slimeballs. regardless, pretty handsome! 6.5/10

quality of character scale: it’s nice that he goes to such a Public and Corporate effort to connect to his stepdaughter! even if it’s in a way that financially benefits him, it’s pretty clear that he cares about this family and wants to do right by them. nothing exceptional, though 7/10

total score: 13.5/20 i GUESS i’d be down to smash if he asked

ralph bartlett (read it and weep)

hotness scale: ok i was gonna say something mean about the fact that he’s balding but honestly he has really nice arms........ in addition he’s really quirky and optimistic which i am going to admire into my grave!! when he gets excited about having customers during the finale his voice quirks with an almost charlie day-esque charm. handsome. ALSO he calls jamie “princess” which is!!!!!!! something 7.5/10

quality of character scale: the way ralph parents his kids is Very 2000s in that he kinda babies his daughter but gets to pal around with his son, but i guess both dynamics come from a place of love and he could be doing much worse. plus he’s an honest hardworking small business owner! i support him 7/10

total score: 14.5/20 i would definitely go out for pizza with him

dr james hartley (how to build a better boy)

hotness scale: THIS. THIS IS WHAT DCOM DADDIES ARE ALL ABOUT. gosh..... this is truly the Most dad ive ever seen in my life. i love how his hair is always mussed..... how he’s so Desperate to relax that he falls asleep after Fifteen Seconds of smooth jazz..... and also. like. hes a scientist?? hello??? pretty sexy of him. i want to give this man the relaxation he deserves 10/10

quality of character scale: ok so,,,...,, kinda fucked up that he lied to his whole family (with the possible exception of his wife—sidenote, WHY did they make dr hartley married? his wife never comes up except when bart says she’s out of town. let him be single so i can slide into those dms) and EXTRA kinda fucked up that he works for the government? what a scab. BUT it’s very very clear that he cares about his kids (and gabby) and prioritizes their safety above all else! also, did you SEE how happy he was when mae won homecoming queen....... he loves her so so so much! :’0 8.5/10

total score: 18.5/20 i thirst tweeted about this man and roger bart replied ‘Aw, thanks!’ so i dont know where to go from here

[saint-patrice]

thanks anon, although i think scientifically speaking, you are actually the best so we may have to agree to disagree….

anyway, let’s get onto the absolute delight that is jake debrusk, shall we?

Note: people seem to like em, so i’m currently taking requests for these posts! see here for more information, and a list of the ones i’ve done thus far :)

i thought we should kick this off with the image i feel summarises jake the best. the big oreo thing (what actually is it????), his big and slightly goofy grin, and his stupid backwards hat. i would, however, like to enquire further about the ‘home’ print hanging on the wall. is jake secretly a white suburban mom? or is that at his parents house or something? answers please

he’s always on a sugar rush from all the oreos and whipped cream, which leads to him doing random shit like this. JD got the moves. every time i see this gif there’s a split second where i think he’s about to dab and my soul leaves my body

oh my gosh. take a look at this very tiny, very young, and very blond jake.

there is simply no way this doesn't win the “world’s cutest photo” award. i mean - boston’s most lovable son wearing a santa hat, looking chuffed as chips, cuddling a giant teddy bear - what more could you want?

(gif via @bergymarchy) this is how he’s going to get himself killed. he’s going to try to pick a real fight with chara one day and zee is going to have no choice but to fucking annihilate him

prefix boys!! the unfocused nature of this photo lends it a strange aura that i can’t quite put my finger on… something is afoot. these boys are troublesome. mr chara please come collect your sons.

this is the single most awkward thing i have seen in my life. jake why

(gif via @debrusks) :D  <- that’s him. that’s jake debrusk</p>

disgusting little man with a whipped cream dependency. “pro athlete” my ass.

(gif via @transpastrnak) this is from that one time he jumped on pasta so hard trying to celly after pasta scored a hat trick that he was genuinely worried he’d injured him. he is just an over-excitable puppy at heart apparently

(gif via @lesbiandebrusk) seems he’s actually got quite the habit of throwing himself into teammates’ waiting arms. here he is being carried away by charlie mcavoy, managing to look impossibly small despite the two of them being the same height

as much as i love him, i’m pretty convinced i’d end up punching him in the face if we had a conversation. he’d come out with some dumb shit like this and i would be momentarily blinded by rage becuase, who says that, and take a swing at him. of course i’d buy him oreos or ice cream or whatever to say sorry and tend to his wounds and apologise profusely, i just–thanos???? that’s your 42yo  captain who is smarter and stronger than any of us can even dream of being and you just out here calling him thanos? i had to laugh but oh my god

excellent! reaction! image! thank you for blessing us with this one jake

(gif via davidpastrnut) i just had to include something from the recent delight that is this video. i love both these dumb boys so much, and i loved their little summer catch-up, despite the phrase “posting up” making an appearance every 3 seconds. bruins social media team, we need more of these. pronto

this so very strongly has the vibes of a kid being forced to hang out with their very uncool and dorky younger brother. i’ll let you decide who is who

here he is, just revelling in the misery of thousands of t*ronto fans and tbh.. you love to see it. atta boy jakey

(gif via @lesbiandebrusk) he even looks good when he’s a SweatyBoy. that’s talent. he does kind of look like he’s about to murder someone though so i’m not really sure what this is all about. you good fam?

Big Caveman Energy. i don’t think jake’s actual beard was bad it was just,, bad on him. he kind of looks like the dodgy man that sits on the bench outside the playground all day that mother’s drag their kids away from. no offense.

there are many excellent jake debrusk photos out there but this one has to be my favourite 😍😍😍

look!! it’s actually frightening to me how young everyone looks in their draft photos. we really just let infants play in the nhl huh?

(gif via @jimmybrodin) is he trying to schmooze the cameraman here or what

ahhhhh this is adorable :’) imagine scoring your first nhl goal in your very first game… that’s talent baby! the interview he did with his dad afterwards is my absolute favourite thing, jake seems to be a v nice young man

this is awful

good photo!!!!!! 👌 that being said, i am slightly perturbed by the amount of arm hair he has, i don’t know why. this kid has impressive eyebrows, also

simply unfortunate

this photo honestly haunts my nightmares. jake, i am begging you to put a proper shirt on. outfit says dodgy gay bar, body language says he’s about to ask me to prom. i hate everything about this

i probably could have ended on a less nightmare-inducing note, but i won’t. i hope jake is out there enjoying his oreos and facetiming his teammates, it’s what he deserves 💕 thanks for the request and your kind words anon!! 

[neokollection]

Could you do how NCT members confess to their crush? Sorry if it's too mucj

NCT 127

A/N: OMGGGG SO LATE!! Sorry, I held on to this for a while because I wanted to do it, but knew it required a lot of thought kinda- I’ll save HC for DreamGifs don’t relate btw^^ Listening to Touch~

Taeil:

This awkward turtle……… Ugh, everyone totally knew he has a thing for whoever he’s crushing on, but he shows it in weird ways so his crush may not know and may just say he’s being friendly…He gets super excited at the sight of them and you can’t really blame him for whatever he does next. He’s dorky, so he makes dad jokes and even goes as far as physical things such as cutting your cutlet for you or something.He doesn’t really plan on verbally confessing, he just hopes his actions and manner can convey it and if you’re interested you’ll convey it back… or not.He’s deeply sentimental and I think a verbal confession would only happen if the sentiment was there- over phone, text, or person, it’d just happen. So, if maybe you felt close enough to him to talk about feeling lonely or maybe an ex-lover- Once he feels the deep feelings he’d want to let you know it’d be okay and share possibly good news? That you’re beautiful and he likes you if you’ll take him. Sort of offering himself to you–

Johnny:

Johnny is a self-proclaimed true romantic. He knows how to read an atmosphere probably better than any of the others and his confession would be really sweet.He’d be one to know he should confess. He doesn’t want to dwell on it if his crush doesn’t like him, so he’d make his moves. By moves I mean yes, flirting, to the point you’d know he had a thing for you, or at least your friends would always tell you if you’re thick… He’s showing you that he’s interested so that maybe you’ll become interested in him or show him some sign back- He’s not shy of it, in his mind you deserve to be loved and know it, so he doesn’t really feel embarrassed about putting himself out there. He also uses a lot of actions to speak instead of words, putting his hands on your shoulders when he’s behind you, tying your shoe for you, etc… When it comes to actually confessing, he’s probably still not sure if you like him back because he’s probably been overthinking everything you do and found contradictions. Anyway… He does it in person and it’s low-key planned. I mean like he asks your schedule or something and finds a way to fit himself in. He doesn’t want it to seem like a date, so he makes it something casual like deciding to walk you home after one of your lectures because he’s ‘in the area’ that time. Kind of odd, but FGSUIRHFWRUIA! So, he sorta will manipulate the conversation while he’s with you, he wants to turn it towards something romantic because he wants to confess to you at your doorstep. “I’ve wanted to say this for a while- You may already know; I like you, a lot- And I just wanted to let you know because you deserve to.”A line straight out of a movie T T He can give a whole speech about why you’re so wonderful if you ask any more about it really.

Taeyong:

So, when it comes to his crush, I think TY would be pretty shy- He’d be sort of all over the place and his crush definitely wouldn’t be able to read him- Being normal and even kind of flirty when he’s feeling close, but occasionally being distant and clamming up…He’s always wondering if his touches go noticed or if they feel their palms perspire at the mere sight of his eyes like he does-He’s kind of a coward when it comes to love and being honest about his feelings… So, I don’t think he’d actually confess in person. This being said, I think it’d happen over text- It’d probably be late at night- You in your bed on your phone and him chilling after a tolling session of choreography. Finally, you guys got a conversation going, before it was always off/on neither of you wanting to seem clingy- Once he feels close as friends too he’d be more open to opening up. He wouldn’t confess to someone he wasn’t close with, he’d just admire them from afar- Anyway, so probably a few flirty texts are hidden in your guys’ conversation and he’s smiling to himself. He’d probably feel a bit nervous if the conversation turned to relationships or loneliness because then he’s prone to confessing with something sorta hidden like;“You’d make a really good S/O. Anyone would be lucky to have you.” “You think so? That’s so sweet-”“I’d feel lucky.”Which… he’s prone to being friendzoned or his crush missing his point, but if it’s you, you won’t :’)The type to also freak out a little when he realizes he’s outted himself also.. and send a whole thread of messages one after another, tapping his foot impatiently, eyes glued to the screen in seriousness as he checks for your reply.

Yuta:

Well- Bitch would have to be blind to not know he’s into them. He’s so shameless honestly. He’s confident in that he’s suitable boyfriend material and handsome + charming, so he wouldn’t be shy about letting them know. He wants them to know actually, he wants them to feel loved and do whatever favors he can to help them, even if it’s stupid like giving them his umbrella in exchange for the promise of a date next weekend. HE HASN’T EVEN CONFESSED YET, but I guess you could take that as a confession. But… He’s kind of flirty with a lot of friends, so you may not think of it blatantly as a ‘date’.His confession would probably come indirectly a lot of times through his words.“Why don’t you have a boyfriend already?”“I don’t know- Life’s busy and I guess I just don’t have someone like that in my life.”“I’m right here though-”He’s a smooth dude, but if you constantly brush him off as ‘just joking’ maybe you’re nervous yourself about jumping the gun then he may turn serious about it and say it directly so he can get a direct reaction and answer, a simple “I like you.”

Doyoung:

Kind of similar to Taeil in that I don’t think he’d want to directly say it. He’s sort of a coward too, like Taeyong. He wouldn’t want to be found out either because he’d feel super embarrassed and childish, so he’d be discreet about his actions and words and ultimately admire his crush from afar….. He’d need a push from others to do something bigger- OR, like Taeil, his heart may bubble to the surface during emotional or deep moments- Perhaps you broke-up with a past lover and are rattled over it and need someone to confide in. He’s always been great with this kind of stuffs– And he knows he shouldn’t make it about himself, but he wants to let you know there’s someone else who can take care of and love you, even better than your past trash. BUT, it probably wouldn’t be when you’re crying in the moment, it’d probably be hours after you’ve calmed down and DY’s been thinking about confessing for hours now and finally lets it out. Or just during a deep talk about love or something he may realize he should be honest about his feelings and say it plainly; “I like you..” followed by 20 other rambles, “I mean not as a friend- I mean! I like you as a friend too! But also more- Ah….” 

Jaehyun:

This boy is out of a drama. He’s pretty versed in navigating love and his feelings, so I don’t think he’d get flustered in front of you or embarrassed. He’d just try to put on a natural persona, maybe getting a bit closer than usual. It’s really just innocent though, ruffling your hair and laughing at your jokes, smiling nearly every time he sees you- It’d be a wonder if you didn’t fall for him uh…….. He’s also a great friend who’s always reliable and he’d become even more reliable when knowing his feelings are growing.Sort of like Johnny, he’d be pretty honest about his feelings. He’d make sure the mood and environment are appropriate before talking to you in private. But I don’t think he’d do it unless he’s getting vibes that you like him even just a little too- He’d kinda bombard and fluster you with it being a lot at once, but he knows your cheeks flush like that because you like him too.“What do you think of me?”“All of a sudden? Hmm, you’re great-”“Great?”“W-Why are you smiling like that? Yeah, you’re great and-”“Do you like me?”“O-”“I like you~”“aH-”“It’s sudden isn’t it? Hah- It’s not really, it’s maybe been a year..”“It’s so unlike you to be like this-”

Win:

He doesn’t know what to do around his crush T THe’s all over the place… He wants to seem cool and chill, but just is a major cutie dork- He goes from being hyper around you to being ‘too cool’ and acting like you’re not even there- If he looks at you he might get a heart attack so maybe it’d be better not to…Sounds bad, but I think he’d need to be feeling emotional or upset to confess. Maybe over text or in person…. An example would be if he liked you for a whole year, but this past week Lucas has been really flirty with you and Winko is catching some vibes he doesn’t like and then Lucas confesses to you. Win would be pretty upset and feel it’s unfair since he’s liked you longer and still hasn’t confessed- So he’d probably write you a long email text about how he’s liked you longer and out himself lmao.Or maybe if he’s just feeling emo and homesick he may confide in you a lot and sorta out himself unintentionally by saying things like ‘I miss you.. You’re all I have here’ Or if in person may just need some hugs and tell you how important you are which kinda leads to how much he admires you for being tough and that leads to how he likes you and anyone would be lucky to be with you-

Mark:

Mark seems like one to try to make himself stop liking someone once he catches feelings. Maybe by talking to you a little less for a bit or just convincing himself he shouldn’t ruin a friendship-He’s stupid though and is whipped so he can’t calm himself every time he sees you, you’re not just a friend. His plan might back-fire and he may think ‘It’ll be better to confess now so she can reject me and I can move on-’ He doesn’t have confidence in this and assumes he won’t be liked back because he hasn’t seen and ‘obvious’ signs that you like him, but he’s frickin oblivious half the time. In some movies and stuff the friends can stay as friends after getting friend-zoned so he hopes it’ll be able to just blow over like that… He’d probably pick a random and awk time to do so tho;“Hey, uh… I just wanna say- Liek, I know I shouldn’t like you like that, but I do kinda like you like that. I think I just need to hear rejection tho so I can get over it, like it’s probably just a phase, right? A lot of people have that with their friends-”“…Who said I’d reject you…?”“Wait- Wot?”

[mzminola]

Reaction Post Two: Ectoplasmic Boogaloo

Misc thoughts now that I’ve both seen the show, and had time to think.*

Kinda feel like I missed an episode or two? I could swear there’s screenshots going around that I never saw in context, and collective knowledge that’re so consistent I could swear I missed something...but that might just be the result of a ten year old active fandom. Is it ever stated how long Vlad was in the hospital with ecto-acne? Or is “five years” just a really popular fanon?

I see why so many people call for a reboot; there’s a lot of neat stuff in the show, but due to the cancellation a bunch of threads got dropped or warped out of recognition. Almost a “rough draft” sort of vibe.

One of the major problems with S3 (starting with the S2 finale, actually) is that they tried to go Bigger! Moar Extreme!! Higher Stakes!!! But worldwide disasters weren’t what the show as about. The pacing in Urban Jungle was terrible (plants taking over should be a slow, creepy story, not a five second greensplosion), Vortex was way to overpowered, and Phantom Planet really only makes sense as someone’s dream. Like. All of Amity Park got dragged into an alternate dimension in Reign Storm, because the Ghost King Dark Pariah was supposed to be a big deal. Leave that as a biggest disaster.

“Million Dollar Ghost” was an adorable episode. Danny trying to cheer Jack back up was painfully sweet and dorky.

The two episodes with Danielle are, together, or separately, the most actually horrifying episodes. Melting clones, who look scared as they go. Seriously. And if you strip the supernatural/sci-fi elements from the summary, the first episode from Danny’s perspective would be “parents’ old friend kidnaps you for nonconsensual reproductive reasons, and then tries to kill you and your baby sister in a fit of rage.” No wonder he’s exuberant when Sam & Tucker save them.

Meanwhile, Maternal Instincts from Maddie’s perspective is also terrifying; lost in the wilderness with your child, the only hope for communication or travel to the outside world is in the house of a man you barely know anymore, who yelled “NO ONE SAYS NO TO ME!” when you refused to leave your husband for him.

Speaking of Maternal Instincts, I think it shows Danny didn’t get all his forgetfulness from Jack; Maddie’s so laser focused on finding a phone that she’s disregarding the vehicles.

(and Maddie, you’re sad that Danny isn’t spending as much time with you as when he was a tiny child, but when he hugged you and said “I love you Mom!”, after your smile and “I love you too,” you physically dislodged him and singsonged “clingy!” Really? I get being uncomfortable with physical contact, but calling your kid clingy for hugging you in one of the few calm moments of a crisis is...kinda mean, Maddie)

~

Thought on Living Large: Danny's not “letting money go to his head and being an asshole”, Danny’s fucking depressed. We’ve seen Danny get a big ego and turn into a  jerk; example, every episode where he gets temporary popularity (invited to Dash’s party thanks to Jazz, dating Paulina, judging the beauty contest). Thanks to Val’s arc, we know one of the things affecting popularity at Casper High is family wealth. If Danny was being a jerk thanks to money he’d be at school, flaunting it. He’s not. He’s not even attending school, he’s barely leaving his room, and he’s irritable. The kid’s depressed.

It makes sense; he just underwent a major life change that he had no control over in a few days, and lost nearly all contact with his family. (I think his parents are out of character selling Fenton Works for any amount of money, but that’s a sidenote). Danny lost his home. He’s in a strange house, his parents’ neglect thanks to their ghost-hunting obsession is no longer mitigated by a small house where they have to interact regularly, and Jazz is hiding in the library. Major upheaval followed by isolation in a strange place. Poor fucking kid.

~

I disagree that “Vlad wants to rule the world” came out of nowhere, but I agree season 3 bungled him terribly. Forget “Phantom Planet”, it’s “Infinite Realms” that’s the worst piece of characterization for him. “take me to my destiny” what the heck,Vlad, that’s so vague. Where’d the Vlad we saw in Reign Storm go?

Vlad (in S1 & S2) makes the most sense if I assume he has long-term goals unrelated to the Fentons. Like he wants revenge on Jack and to ‘win’ Maddie, but honestly he’s had twenty fucking  years for that, it’s like the college reunion came up on his calendar and he want “oh, nice opportunity”. (though Jack’s firm belief in ghosts despite never seeing one until ep1 makes sense if we assume Vlad’s been periodically sending things like the vultures to mess with him invisibly...)

When I first watched Bitter Reunions, I was struck by how badly Vlad handled Danny. In retrospect, it’s even more startling considering how well he manipulated Val. So I thought, why? Well, with Val, Vlad is exploiting her negative emotions towards Phantom and other ghosts. Whereas with Danny, Vlad seems almost incapable of understanding that Danny likes his dad, and in Maternal Instincts he’s likewise confused by Maddie’s loyalty to her husband. Maybe its just that his own view of Jack blinds him to other’s perspectives, but he’s also surprised that Jack defeats him in Million Dollar Ghost. Jack was aided by love and protective feelings for his family, positive emotions. I don’t really think “Vlad has trouble understanding positive emotions in others” is a solid explanation, but it’s a start.

Alsooooooooo, re: Bitter Reunions and most of his other interaction with Danny: Vlad's making Skulker work for him, the vultures (despite being almost 2000 years older than him) do as he says, and we see him regularly searching the Ghost Realm for artifacts and getting into fights.

I think Vlad has spend ten to twenty years (whenever his ghost powers really got going) beating up other ghosts to get what he wants. “No one says no to me!” “Must I beat you with one hand behind my back before you admit you’re outmatched?”

He’s used to manipulating humans, but he saw Danny first and foremost as “ghost kid”, and so tries the same tactics he’s used on all the other ghosts; hit them until they do what you want. This...doesn’t work, with Danny. Sure, Vlad outpowers him, but the kid has a support network, and he thinks on his feet (making a shield bubble after seeing Vlad’s square flat shield? threatening to out both of them? The kid forgets about his own powers half the time, but adapts quickly, which is one of the big reasons hes lasted so long in the hero biz)

~

Danny never came out to his parents (excepting Phantom Planet) because as long as they didn’t know, he could keep believing they’d accept him no matter what. Schrodinger’s Parental Acceptance.

I think that’s all my post-series thoughts for now.

~

*I apparently wrote this post months or years ago and never posted it, though I did post the segment about depression on it’s own at some point?

[adorkablepeter]

Dating Advice || Peter Parker

Summary

Peter consults Y/N's dad Tony about girls and dating but little does Tony know that Peter is using his advice on his daughter. Words: ~ 2000

A/N: Here it is! I hope you like it. Have fun. :)

×××

Peter nervously fiddled with his fingers before looking up at the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Y/N Stark.

Of course he had to fall for her. Her gorgeous looks literally hit him in the face and hearing her voice didn't make things any better. The young boy wanted nothing more than listening to her soft voice for the rest of his life.

"You okay, Peter?", she spoke up, and Peter's heart jumped slightly when he heard the concern in her voice. "Y-yeah... I w-was just... you know...", he answered, stuttering and cursing in his head since he still couldn't talk to her properly.

"I told you that there's no need to be nervous around me.", Y/N smiled at him and touched his arm but that only caused another stop of his heartbeat.

"Yeah... n-no. I mean, yes, you did. But...", Peter stuttered, scratching the back of his neck before he took a deep breath. "Have you seen Mr. Stark?"

Smiling to himself for bringing out a sentence in one piece, Peter dared to look into her beautiful eyes before she nodded. "Yeah, he's in the main lab. Do you want me to come with you?", she wanted to know but Peter only shook his head, "N-No, it's fine..."

Swiftly walking away from her and possible embarrassments, he realised that he didn't thank her. "Oh, a-and thank you...", he mumbled after he had turned around.

And while Y/N dreamily chuckled due to his adorable behaviour, Peter mentally scolded himself for being so Peter-ish.

He quickly arrived at the main lab, walking towards Mr. Stark before taking off his backpack. "Hey, kid.", Tony greeted him, putting away a tool he had been using.

"Hello, Mr. Stark. I brought the suit. Just like you told me to.", Peter replied, pulling out the Spider-Man suit out of his backpack.

"Okay, so I'm going to put in a new tracker and a new parachute.", the man explained and Peter only hummed in agreement before Tony started to work.

"Mr. Stark, can I ask you something?", Peter carefully approached him, still unsure about the question he was about to ask.

"Only if you keep your distance. You're sending out weird vibes. It's distracting me.", Tony mumbled and Peter narrowed his eyebrows in confusion but did as he was told.

"How do I... talk to a girl... that I like... a lot?", Peter rubbed his hands together, regretting that he actually asked him such a thing. But he needed some manly advice and didn't want to bother Aunt May, who had been very busy at the time.

Tony turned around to face Peter and looked at him strangely while Peter nervously looked at his shoes.

"Okay, first you gotta be a bit more confident. Man up. You're Spider-Man and not some twelve - year old boy.", Tony mumbled after he turned back to the suit. Peter actually felt a bit of confidence flooding through him. Mr. Stark was right. He was Spider-Man.

"And then tell her some jokes. Make her laugh. Compliment her.", Tony continued, "Every girl wants to get compliments. Especially about the little things but that's your part to find out."

Peter nodded to himself. Jokes and Compliments. Jokes and Compliments. Jokes and Compliments.

It couldn't be that hard, right?

Wrong. The next time Peter faced Y/N he was already blushing without even saying a word. The thought of making a fool out of himself was making him too nervous.

They had met in the kitchen and while Y/N was attempting to make some pancakes Peter was watching her from his seat behind the counter.

While she was telling him about her day, something she often did since Peter was the perfect listener, Peter waited for the a good moment to use one of the jokes he looked up on the Internet.

And just like God had heard his prayers, Y/N flipped the pancake giving Peter the perfect opportunity.

"Did you hear about the angry pancake...?", he waited for her to react and she looked up at him curiously, "He just flipped." He motioned his head towards the frying pan and Y/N let out a loud laugh, smiling to herself before looking at Peter again. "That one wasn't bad.", she nodded when she turned her attention back to the pancake.

Peter smiled proudly and continued to watch her. She flipped another pancake but failed, causing the both teenagers to laugh. "You try it and we'll see who does it better.", Y/N challenged Peter, who nodded and went over to her.

He was nervous. Not about the challenge, no. It was because of Y/N standing so close to him and touching his arm.

It was distracting but Peter still managed to flip the pancake perfectly before letting out a sigh of relief. "You win this one, Parker. But this means war.", Y/N said with furrowed eyebrows but then chuckled after she saw the shocked expression on his face.

"Relax! I'm kidding.", she laughed, leaning into his side briefly and making his heart jump to his throat. She smirked at him before she started making another pancake which got very thin but she just shrugged her shoulders, "Well, that one is no pancake... it's a Crêpe."

"My aunt's pancakes are so thin, too. It gives me the crepes.", Peter said with a dorky smile on his lips and Y/N laughed again, unconsciously pressing her side against Peter's arm.

The boy admired her while her laugh faded and she blushed when she noticed his stare. "Yeah, I know, my laugh sounds so awkward...", she mumbled nervously but Peter only shook his head. "It's s-sounds very... beautiful to me. I-I think it's unique.", he admitted before he looked at his feet, missing the deep blush that appeared on her cheeks.

His fingertips pressed against the cold counter while he was panicking on the inside. Why wasn't she answering? Oh no, she thinks I'm a creep...

"Thank you, Peter.", she smiled, brushing over his arm up to his shoulder and making him look at her, "That's very nice of you to say."

The brunet boy blushed when some words popped into his head, unsure about speaking them out loud. But she was already blushing and smiling at him, that's what he had wanted. It was going good.

Could it go better?

"Y-Your laugh... is as beautiful as you.", he finally said without looking at her, "No, it's- it makes you even more beautiful than you already are."

Y/N chuckled nervously, biting on her smiling lips before she tugged a strand of hair behind her hair. "Peter, you're really sweet.", she avoided eye contact, looking at the ground but Peter saw the blush creeping on her face anyway.

Peter smiled. Yes, it could go better.

A sizzle interrupted the comfortable silence, making Y/N swiftly grab the spatula before she flipped the pancake and pressed on it.

"Careful, don't put to much pressure on it. Or else it'll have a paniccake attack.", Y/N burst out into another laughter after Peter's words left his mouth. "Where do you even get those stupid jokes from?", she wanted to know, chuckling and shaking her head.

"A friend told me.", Peter lied, not wanting her to know that he searched the Internet for good jokes only to make her laugh. He didn't want to push his luck.

Before Y/N could answer, one of her father's Iron Man suits entered the kitchen with the words "I smell pancakes."

"And here you can see pancakes.", Y/N laughed, holding up the plate full of pancakes. "Oh, hey Peter, do you mind bringing me some pancakes? You're my intern after all.", Tony's sassy voice filled the room before Y/N chuckled quietly and Peter sighed, "Of course, Mr. Stark."

Peter took an extra plate before stacking a couple of pancakes on it while the Iron Man suit left. "Hey, Peter.", Y/N started, hesitantly reaching out for his arm, "Do you- I don't know. Do you want to text later?"

Peter's heart stopped at her question, tightening his grib on the plate. "Y-Yeah, that would be g-great. Yeah, that's... awesome.", he stammered, nodding and smiling at her.

"Okay, text you later then.", the girl chuckled and Peter stumbled backwards, nodding before he turned around. Letting out a victory call in his head, he left the kitchen to bring the pancakes to her father. He swiftly made his way to the main lab, trying to get this stupid grin off of his face but it seemed impossible.

"Ah, finally!", Tony exclaimed as Peter placed the plate in front of him before he just grabbed one and took a big bite.

"So, you got any news concerning that girl?", he asked with a mouth full of pancake and Peter nodded.

"I'm still working the confidence thing but... I guess, it's going good.", he smiled, "She has this beautiful smile, you know... Gosh, she is such an angel. I look at her and she seems like she's glowing like she is the sun in my life. I mean it makes me feel like a sunflower, desperate to stare at her forever and getting all of my energy from her laugh. It's just...", Peter trailed off when he noticed himself rambling like a crazy person. Tony only looked at him with a smile, realising how deep Peter had fallen. "Sorry.", Peter mumbled, closing his eyes as if he could just shut out the embarrassment.

"It's okay, loverboy.", Tony chuckled but Peter still shifted uncomfortably on his feet. " I assume the jokes and the compliments worked?" Peter nodded at this question and Tony hummed.

"Okay, keep it going. But now we're adding some gifts: flowers, choclate.... whatever she likes.", the man explained and Peter nodded, listening attentively, "But if she doesn't like flowers, it's gonna make things worse! I learned that the hard way... so pay attention!"

And so he did. He paid extra attention to Y/N's texts, reading their chat over and over again. Occasionally he sneaked some questions into their conversation before he decided to start with her favourite chocolate brand which turned out to be a huge success. He decided against flowers, not wanting to gain attention from Tony or one of the Avengers. So the simple chocolate bar gift became their thing because Peter knew that she didn't want anything else, especially jewellery which she didn't like at all.

"It feels so good to see her smile because of me, you know.", Peter told Tony, "I really like how I can make her happy. That's just... incredible."

Tony nodded with a smile while Peter rambled on about his innocent intentions.

"Okay, let me stop you right there.", Tony interrupted him and Peter shut up immediately, "Next step is flirting. Tease her a little bit... Touch her. But don't go to far! And if she let's you and defers to it... you got her. The last thing you have to do is kiss her or admit your feelings." Peter blushed at the mere thought of kissing her, looking at his hands with a smile.

"Tony, what the hell is this thing in our kitchen?", Pepper entered the room with an annoyed expression before Peter had the chance to say anything. "It's a gift.", Tony replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and Pepper shook her head with a sigh before she turned to Peter.

"How's your thing with Y/N going?", she smiled and Peter stumbled backwards. "M-My thing... w-with, uh, I don't-", he chuckled nervously before Tony let out an indignant "What?!"

"Yeah, I saw it on the surveillance video. He's plastering her with compliments and gifts.", Pepper laughed before Peter looked at Tony with wide eyes.

"Parker, I think we need to talk."

××× Part 2

All Posts: @imnothavingkids @marvel-midtown @heytomholland Peter Parker Taglist: @ceci1735 @youngdreamerparadise-bf2ba176 @bringmetomnow @holycoldcoffee @just-a-new-start @aussie-mantle Dating Advice: @thevanishedillusion @purplekitten30 @binky-bean @potterhead236