#dont expect much from me tho
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SORRY I FORGOT ABOUT THIS BLOG AGAIN
#stocking up queue a little bit rn#dont expect much from me tho#im very silly like that#not a heriatage post#just queued them to the wrong blog fml
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was talking to my brother the other day after i rewatched dark phoenix and he was like 'why is everyone so mean to charles in this movie?? were they always this mean to him ?? is it cause he's bald now- he lost his pretty privilege??' and i fear i havent recovered
#xmen#xmen movies#dark phoenix#charles xavier#professor x#snap chats#LIKE HE'S RIGHT 1000% I JUST DIDN'T EXPECT HIM TO SAY IT VLERKVJAKLJ#ANOTHER banger of a quote from my brother chat i screamed when he said that#adopting that into my belief system i fear#like really thinking on it they really did only start being especially rude after apocalypse im crying#dont quote me on that i have to rewatch apocalypse but as far as im aware. yeah 😭😭#and its SUCH a travesty cause i love how mcavoy looked in DP SO much he looks so good bald#like please if we were going to wrap up this era of xmen films why did we have to rerun DP#can we try again. please. i need him bald one more time in a movie i dont have to argue with myself i like#see DP wasnt the worst thing ever. probably. like scott got to do things again ..... and kurt .......#and the paris proposal. never forget that.#ALSO THE FUCKIN. 'no one cares charles' BIT ???? 97 ref'd that directly i know they did and i cheered#listen if they can ref the 'black leather suits' from the xmen movies i can believe they called back to that too <- delusional#anyway when james said thats the meanest thing erik could say/do to charles .... he was cooking ....#'thats the type of thing your wife/husband says' he was so right .... we know james never misses with the cherik takes tho#ok bye i have obligations that i need to complete so i can draw my favorite cue ball
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got a little carried away with this one... outfit sent by @chocolategothwolfhorse <3
#couldnt decide which version i like better so Yall Get Both#this fit is one of many bangers sent in one ask#i meant to knock a few of em out in the same post#but some sort of demon possessed me and made me do lighting. and a silly background#thank you demon but also go to#go to. go. well. hm.#fuck you very much sir lighting demon#happy with this tho. tried some new things.#dont expect fully rendered stuff from me often its exhausting and takes forever#scribble garnish#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#welcome home fanart#wally darling#yesterday yall got slightly creepy wally now you get Wholesome Boy Says Hello
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Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!
I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.
#fe three houses#ferdinand von aegir#discord emotes#i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but#i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share#since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself#the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but#some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts#so those im gonna skip on lol#whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em#i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones#if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use#i used concernednand (the upper one) so much#the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time#debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love#fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist#someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet#and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art#and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet#and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote#and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server#some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me#cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog#and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog#so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here#so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao#anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server#i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away
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thinking about kab and the thing about her i think is she knows just enough to keep herself safe Generally but not enough to really predict what would happen should something more... complicated??? unforeseen??? idk whats the right word to use but something not covered by someones reputation and/or vids happen, believe it or not this also affects her view of clownpierce (we'll get to that)
for example, mapicc has a reputation for being an violent, angry, & impulsive guy and nothing else which makes sense but is incredibly surface level and something that only really works if you dont have a lot of experience working with him
another is reddoons, his betrayal after the base incident while shocking is not unforeseen but his reputation as being a guy whos seen as being a reasonable person whos fairly loyal to his team made it seem like something he wouldnt do even tho it absolutely is
regarding how it affects her view of clown, since he isnt perfectly aligned with his reputation she instead pivots in the complete opposite direction and forgiving basically every crime he does even tho hes something much more mild and complicated than either his reputation or her view of him will ever be (think madonna-whore complex which is especially obvious when it comes to kabs vs woogies view of him)
another side effect of this Just Enough amount of knowledge aside from being blinded by her own expectations is that it frustrates ppl who think shes oversimplificating things (like me and seemingly several other tumblr users as well) especially when she claims that shes objectively correct and the smartest in the room at any given moment
how this roughness in her analysis affects her in the server still has yet to be fully seen but we do still have at least a couple months until the end but 'til then shes just gonna keep stumbling as more and more complicated situations pop up as is typical in lifesteal to happen and eventually shes gonna have to learn to adapt or else she'll be suffering the consequences one way or another
#mine.txt#analysis#ig. this is very rough tho and is more just thoughts than anything#but i wanted a tag so i can get back to this later to see how right or wrong i am#another thing that affects this is the cc/c divide which is something she likes to take control of#one of the ways it manifests is that she likes to go in and out of it frequently which can be incredibly distracting#esp if youre someone like me who wants the lsers to just. be themselves and get immersed in whats happening around them#and it doesnt help that her and her character can have Very different feelings on a situation#basically the cc/c divide or at least how kab likes to use it affects the way she acts because shes got an idea in her head already#of what to think of the other ppl in the server which makes her inflexible when unexpected things come up#as opposed to when shes just being herself reacting to things#which is unfortunate but i think reflects on how outsiders vs insiders view lifesteal#the reality vs expectations of the audience are so incredibly different esp if you only watch the vids#so much so that while watching kabs vid my initial reaction was that she wasnt as big a ls fan as i originally thought#then realized no this seems like the exact sort of thing id expect from someone whos only seen the vids; particularly of the pvpers#(specified pvpers cause only watching the pvpers vs other kinds of players on the server are Very different experiences)#tho the thing about kab is she Does have insider knowledge!#.... mainly from ppl who dont log on a lot (ash and clown and maybe squiddo)#so naturally thats gonna give her a biased view of how the server works one way or another#the exception to this would be zam telling her about eclipse federation but i think either she doesnt know or severely underestimated#just how much lying; manipulation; keeping secrets; and yap sessions built on incompatible motives and morals happened#that made s4 the way it is not only in game but outside of it as well#''we're at our best when we hate each other irl'' - reddoons according to zam
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heres some other recent art ive done!! im very inconsistent HELP (the first one is the second day of mizukana week that i DEFINETLY didnt forget to post!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🤩🥰😍🥰🥰😍🥰🤩🥰 and the second one is a paid art request)
#core when will you ever learn to post in 3 platforms at a time.......facepalm emoji#i have no knowledge of bocchi the rock but it looks pretty neat to me ngl#maybe ill watch the anime perhaps.lol#also fun fact.the 3rd drawing is actually a redraw of the first doodle i did of project sekai!! i drew emu first out of anyone lol#project sekai#prsk fa#proseka#pjsk fanart#prsk#mizuki akiyama#nightcord at 25:00#kanade yoisaki#25 ji nightcord de#mizukana#niigo mizuki#niigo kanade#wxs nene#wxs emu#wxs#emunene#(i guess ???)#bocchi the rock!#ryo yamada#bocchi fanart#(idk its nkt much but ill still tag that lol .dont expect bocchi the rock art aside from thsi tho unless i get paid again LMAO)
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i fear i may be wrong 🥲🥲
i did some math (quite literally) and i now think episode 7 will end just before the dreaded fight of mayuri vs pernida... so somewhere in chapter 635.
at least we kenmayu shippers get a crumb next episode, this scene is for sure getting animated
#my posts#mayuri kurotsuchi#mayuri vs pernida#aaah im sad... i was looking forward to the fight being next week#i could very well be wrong tho#i do think mayuri vs pernida will take up two episodes (not full) because its like 10 chapters long depending on how u look at it#im very excited but im quite disappointed bc i was expecting it to be animated next week.... in other words im impatient#i dont think it will be in next weeks ep bc of pacing#but the anime goes from animating 4 chapters to 9#so its a bit hard to predict#i think next weeks ep will have a big character lore dump which is why i dont think it will animate so much#oh well time will tell#incoherent rambling let me hush
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pls i need to provide updates
#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year#and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire#and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f#friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl#acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what#are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and#friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after#everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to#invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me#i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother#and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids#so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo#any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd#and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk#THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date#w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a#few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay#scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK#like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl#like is that even doable#but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much#.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us#god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x#but it would be soooo funny#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed#popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x#i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like#its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe
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umineko sliding scale as of rn for me to how sympathetic i find each character (not necessarily how much i like, just like. i get where they're coming from) as of right now bcs theres like a bunch more of the story so its bound to change.
"i was born to understand your visions" -> maria and shannon "i really feel for you here" -> natsuhi and kanon "yeah, i get it" -> kumasawa, jessica, kirie "parts of you i cannot resonate with, but others i am either compelled by or can understand" -> battler and rosa "no paticular thoughts" -> genji, the doctor i forgot his name, "more of you i dont sympathize with than i do, but there's still elements" -> eva, hideyoshi "you're gonna have to show me something more for me to understand where you're coming from" -> gohda, krauss, rudolf "i dont sympathize with you (as i understand you now.) -> george and kinzo
beatrice exists outside the scale bcs i dont understand anything shes got going on but i am compelled. maybe once let sjust let her win i wanna see where this goes
#i know kinzo missed beatrice. i dont know enough about that relationship to be. all that compelled tho#maria and shannon ive already spoken at length#natsuhi's crazy interesting to me#kanon i wanna now more but he shares a lot of what makes shannon cool#i get it tier mainly just#they dont have anything crazy i can see going on but what they do say i see it#battler and rosa its like#battlers got his issues but at the same time he's an interesting viewpoint.hes very very different from me but hes interesting#i understand more of rosa's presentation atm then i would expect#i've got complex thoughts on both of em#basically everyone else i dont know much enough on to say#with exceptions of kinzo n george who i've already talked about#void plays umineko#umineko#i mean that's the fun part right#there's 18 characters#but theres only 18.#thats like the maigoen cast#thats not that many#so i trust each will get devlopment in time#and i wonder how itll change how i feel about em#the greatest challenge: can umineko make me like george
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you know the content drought is bad when you think about content from over a year ago and still get excited
#this is about gregorys voicelines in ruin#i cannot express to u all how hype his trailer lines were to me#it was insane#especially bc back then before ruin i was fully under the impression both gregory and vanessa would be returning in ruin#which wasnt even a crazy assumption like. they were the only characters in the story besides the animatronics#but alas here we are#im still hype as fuck tho for when they come back for real#its in the horizon i can feel it#i truly have so much hope because of secret of the mimic#its marking the end of the mimic being integrated and the beginning of it just being IN the story already#and the story now being able to progress instead of only introductions#hype as fuck#especially as someone whos a gregory fan and knows for sure he'll come back#at the very least just for cassies elevator plotline#but i really think he'll be allowed to have more going on than just what relates to cassie#theres ggy after all and we all know they know about that shit#those references are a giant red blinking arrow towards screentime#but i also dont think thatll be all hes going to have going on from now on either#fully expecting it to be established not in real time in like a prequel or something similar#at least referenced from the past#then when hes doing shit in real time in the present its just gregory#pandas.txt#pandas talks
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.
#we're all feeling so much and this may sound selfish but i need to vent#i feel a bit alone rn with all of this#i mean i always knew i was alone but this is just confirming it all to me#everyone in my life knows how much one direction and the boys mean to me#i dont hide from anyone at all#and most of my irl “friends” (dont even know if they can be called friends)#didnt even come to me to say something#and i know most of them saw the news#idk it just feels like it doesnt matter#and also my parents#they truly never cared aabout my likes#cant even properly name the boys even tho im always talking about them#my dad came into my room and saw me crying#and was all “what happened?” and my brother told him#he's only reaction was to say “really?” and the he left#didnt say a word to me at all#later my mom got home and i think my dad told her i was crying#so she came to my room and she at least showed a bit more interest#and asked me about it and who it was and everything#i was crying talking to her and she didnt even give me a hug#idk i felt alone again#i didnt really expect a hug from my dad but i did from my mom#and i got nothing#its like my feelings about anything matter#anyway sorry if its selfish#its just another thing making me feel sad on top of everything else#personal
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GUESS WHO IS BACK BITCHES
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thank you nightbringer for existing and thus making me return back to my obey me fixation i have many thoughts about this
#ruiirambles#obey me#obey me nightbringer#nightbringer#dear god i absolutely adore how different it is compared to the og#tho i feel the rhythm is too;; uhh repeated (???)#i cant english its 2 AM and im sleepy#i feel like its a little bit repeptitive but idk it could be because of the fact that i practically am coming from twst so my#expectations are alot different and what im used to etcetc#also i still love satan even tho he’s (somewhat) the complete opposite of what OMSWD is#i ADORE the fact that they’re (the boys) are like#soooo much nicer in contrast to omswd#but at the same time its sorta eerie esp with lucifer LMAO#LUCIFER LAUGHS NOW ???#OH AND ALSO DONT GET ME STARTED WITH THE LEVIATHAN TSL STUFF#THE WAY I CHOWE THE «oh SHIT we’re in TSL» option only to be greeted by#«wtf is tsl» FROM LEVIATHAN WAS D E V A S T A T I N G /hj#also i thought they like#by they i mean leviathan oops#accidentally left the maze game thing opened so i was like «jfc not this again» when he gently opened the door moment and got greeted by#—not lucifer#also i need to sleep#OH SPEAKING OF SLEEP#NIGHTBRINGER MAKES ME FORGET THE FACT THAT BELPHEGOR L I T E R A L L Y KILLED US#AND I GO aww belphie BUT THEN I REMEMBER#i still hold a grudge.#ok gn
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pinning so its seen-
sorry for not being as mentally ill on here/posting as much art/finnishing the peices i promised- i sadly have gotten myself a life for the next few weeks and am dieging. please send curses and blights my way so i can stop existing-
#ya so um. im learning hoe to drive yay!!!#but learning how to drive is taking up a bunch of my time-#and ive got therapy on top of that also with volenteering and classes and dnd and i booked a hangout with a friend this weekenx-#and thats not even touching how my drawing brain has been switched out with knitting because im sooo fucking cold and i have#a really lovely yarn the color of chuuyas hair and that homey yarn smell that makes you sleepy and is so so warm#plus the knit im using for it makes it so plush and comfy wile not being soft-#its just wjfbsucjejd so yeah! am on knitting kick#i will probably be back on my bs more in december but for the rest of october and november pls dont expect too much from me-#im! also! still trying to roleplay blog tho having a life is very much getting in the way of that-#yeah im really sorry- im also trying to inprove style again and am working on side profiles so now gotta fix up front view to look good#too and ajfbsjfbsubfudhfj- thats also also not counting how i gotta stay on top of my studdies and health and everything-#cause like. i still cant have dairy. and im i think im getting better slowly from the shift but it made me start to taste blood again#and is all just- yeah- again im so so sorry for not being here as mych i am just so tired#next week im going to make sure im not as busy. i swear. if im as busy/productive as this week i will die
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Find someone slightly annoying but in really small harmless ways so I decide none of the behaviours are worth bringing up with them → realizing: hey, Im also annoying! solidarity! → realizing we have a lot in common and starting to bond → finding out other people find this person annoying and are vocal about it behind their back → finding out this person has ADHD like me that's (at least one reason) why we have all these traits in common → fear.
#trying to be as vague as possible even tho this is someone I know offline and no one involved follows me online#on one level I get it that relying someone who is forgetful and does things slower/differently than you can be frustrating#but like its a medical condition. and u dont need to know someones medical info to have some empathy instead of assuming malice/incompetence#i just found out they have adhd today but day one i was able to go 'wow i did not like the way they handled that but i dont think they were#being hurtful/careless we just handle this task differently. rhey didnt do anything wrong and i can let this go and adjust my expectations'#not to say im perfect and never ableist towards others. my first reaction to seeing traits i dislike in myself (from my disabilities)#in others is often to get annoyed and needing to adjust my thinking#i get annoyed with myself when I cant focus / cant be coherent or concise / cant finish tasks quickly etc#→ get annoyed sometimes when I see others doing that → realize thats not fair to them → realize thats not fair to myself#→ assume good intentions and find ways to communicate/collaborate better with them → get along better and maybe make a new friend!#sorry i am rambling#idk its scary seeing someone being disliked for adhd symptoms/traits that im mostly doing a good job of managing/hiding in this#social environment so far and knowing that could happen to me in the future#but im also like ready to have this persons back#me 🤝 them: prioritizing the wrong tasks and overexplaining things and struglging to get our points across#and not noticing when we talk too loud and forgetting tasks halfway thru etc#not to be that guy but : without love it canmot be seen!!!!#lifes so much better if u just assume ppl arent doing things a certain way to be annoying + let go of / adapt to the thing that are annoying#but not harmful#thats not exactly what without love it cant be seen means but thats one of the ways i apply it in life#just like dont assume malice. assume u dont have all the info. approach ppl/situations with empathy.#or youll make yourself more miserable needlessly#again like only for shit that's not harmful obv#i need to shut up and go to bed
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happy bday to me! 🎂🥳🎉
for this very special day i wanted to list and compare the presents and interactions i got in the mobile games ive been playing consistently lmao
under cut cause the pics are big
Time Princess A letter with 10 golden tickets, 100 stamina, and 10000 coins
Obey Me! Nightbringer 1 UR+, UR, and SSR Joker each 3 Demon Vouchers 30 Karma Points 200 AP 30000 Grim 50 Devil Points Along with a bday video, birthday calls from the characters throughout the day and a UR guarantee for a 10 pull There's half-off on Devil Tree unlocks There's also special birthday dialogue in the Surprise Guests: -- the first Surprise Guest I did gave me 30 more Devil Points -- and you can press anywhere on the boys and get max hearts :]
What in HELL is Bad They haven't implemented bday stuff yet so nothing (´。_。`)
Twisted Wonderland A Happy Birthday from the character you have set as your favorite card and a Tenfold Key Set (for rolls)
and last but not least.....*drum roll* 🥁🥁🥁 Love and Deepsace! Special Happy Birthdays from each guy which include them singing happy birthday to you :3 Birthday Dialogue on the home screen Presents from each one (items you can use to decorate their desks) 500 Diamonds 5 Empyrean Wishes 1 Bottle of Wishes: SSR 1 Energy Capsule: Powerful And 2 birthday stickers
#so whb is technically in last place but since its a newer game ill let it pass this year#so time princess is next in line for last place#its a fine gift but since they dont have any characters saying happy birthday it doesnt do much for me#nightbringer kinda surprised me!#i was expecting a call and some devil points#but this is a lot more then i expected :3c#also i go crazy for free UR+ Jokers#i was thinking of adding regular obey me but decided to skip it since i only really just log in for dailies for the most part#(and i dont even do that everyday if im not feeling it)#also theyre practically the same minus the calls (but i have the old ones that i havent listened to yet still)#twst was cute nothing too crazy#(thank you for ur presence lilia)#i liked love and deepspaces happy bdays from the characters a lot because they sang lmao 😭#also i feel very special from them saying all this nice stuff about hoping that i get what i want and that i stay healthy and stuff dwsiiws#it feels like obey me has more in character interactions BUT when i think it about it more#deepspace has the models actually hand you gifts#also the moment you have with the characters feels more personal#but tbf theres more obey me characters and you do get those calls throughout the whole day! (also they give more stuff imo)#so i cant really pick which one i liked more :d#dutp#obey me nightbringer#twisted wonderland#love and deepspace#im now 26....#oh jeez#long post#still doing the same shit i was doing in middle school uashusha (i mean playing dating games)#my personality has refined over the years tho#anyways im gonna celebrate tomorrow with my family :]#this is the end of my post tho ill probably post about the asmo phone call later
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