#don't think highly of myself rn

[chemicalarospec]

man i'm never gonna be the cool young person at the bar with their friends having a deep discussion. i'm always gonna be the painfully shy loner who can't connect who can't be close to other people who doesn't go out and thinks about frivolous stuff twice as much as anything interesting

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

"i mess up things and then i don't have the energy to fix them up" yes brain true sentence but no brain the appropriate response is NOT "therefore i should kill myself (and here's how)"

[hexcitrine]

randomly looked at this account to update my age and holy shit it's been a while since i posted here..........i have a small pile of art i have yet to post but hbhbshdbshbd too lazy

[yousaytomato]

I'm helping customers as much as I was a few months ago, I'm still providing good service and good outcomes and I'm more knowledgeable than ever. And I care about my job and we work well as a team and I generally feel like I know what I'm doing.

But, new management have brought in measures to track every single thing we do, we're being observed almost daily by managers, we have targets that aren't technically targets, but "why haven't you done the recommended amount this week?"

There's so many extra things to do, which don't actually add anything to the service we provide, just make us all more on edge and stressed. I'm being made to feel like if I do something wrong, they'll close our department and it will be my fault - because it couldn't possibly be anything to do with the stupid decisions that have been passed down from people making five times my salary.

This doesn't even scratch the service in terms of redundancies and extra training and extra work load and extra responsibilities and reduced benefits and just. Fuck it all.

[wizardnuke]

stimulant meds are so funny. "appetite suppressing" bro i've been back on adhd meds for three days and have eaten more than i have in the past week prior. hungy

[woolydemon]

I am cursed with the burden of liking so many things but not having energy to make art for all the things I like 😭

[cerunilea]

It has just crossed my mind that I unironically say "owo" as a sound of intrigue or interest, or just a way to convey the feeling of "huh. *blink*" after someone says something and I'm not quite sure what to say in response.

[gloooper]

3D Gillion WIP

RAAGGHHH I have been in blender hell for like 3 weeks and I have nearly finished this low poly model of Gillion!!! Features a responsive 2d facial animation rig :3 I just have some bones to finish adding drivers to (and a sword and environment to model and texture) and then he is ready to animate!!! (nerd shit rant under cut)

I have been having a lot of fun learning blender!! in comparison to my first model in March of this year I think I have certainly come a long way!

Bonus: I am finally starting to understand the evil spaghetti

Here is the nodes for the 2d facial animation rig in all their glory! it's a whole process but a lot of fun I was using principled BSDF for shading up until the point of actually making the face rig which... does not work if you add a bunch of colour mix nodes so I had to switch to diffuse BSDF. If you're interested in learning how to make a rig this is the tutorial I followed it only covers the eyes but you can just copy the steps for making the eyes and use it to make additional bones for the mouth & eyebrows, adding them through colour mix nodes with alpha channels set to your textures like in my image!

I have also been using the pribambase plugin & aseprite to create my textures which I highly recommend! asesprite honestly is such a wonderful and intuitive program I had never made pixel art before starting this project and I know I certainly could be doing better (I am fully aware the model has mixels but I honestly don't hate the look personally which I know isn't the common take but whatever) but for my first time doing pixel art I'd say it's not too bad! Pribambase is a bit of a pain to set up now since the original creator has discontinued it and is no longer supporting it but it is still possible to find and use I am happy to teach anyone who would like to know!

Once the model is done I will be releasing my blender files & texture files as free to use for anyone who wants to animate with it or just play around & deconstruct! (with the exception of my animations) I am only learning myself so idk how useful they'll be but I would not have been able to make this model if it wasn't for kind modellers online who have released their files to deconstruct and learn from.

I have many plans for future blender projects all currently jrwi related (the brainrot is intense rn) & I am very excited to keep learning as I go! I currently have plans to make low-poly models of all the riptide pirates, the pd & the godslayers with animations in mind :p and I really wanna try some 3d sculpting (and maybe 3d printing) which I have wiwi in mind for... if any of these ideas get finished I will also release those models for free :)

[thechibilitwick]

As an honorary Shidou apologist, I am breaking my silence. I’ve finally decided to go on a rant on why I don't think Kirisaki Shidou is an organ harvester.

(fair warning I like absolutely suck ass at organizing my thoughts, so if some of this is incoherent or if it seems like i'm repeating myself my bad 😭 I mainly wrote this for fun)

So, I'm aware that this theory is the most popular consensus when it comes to Shidou (and tbh, I think part of it is because a lot of people kinda look over him? Like at least a tiny bit more than the others, considering a lot of people also don’t realize how his main victim was probably his son and not his wife, but I digress) (plus I think all milgram characters are looked over to a certain extent). While I do think parts of it are probably accurate in some way, I don't think he was a full-on organ harvester (as in he actively stole from patients through illegal means. emphasis on actively) and that the theory in and of itself is flimsy at best. He's morally questionable, yes, but it’s more in the sense that he’s a somewhat apathetic guy who lacked understanding on how his own set of morals and values (i.e. pushing for organ donation) could be seen as wrong. So if he were an organ harvester, wouldn’t he be aware that it’s illegal? That’s what confuses me whenever people bring it up. I don't actually doubt that he may have done something illegal for his family's sake, it’s just that I still highly doubt it was something he actively did. And that seems to be what a lot of people think when they refer to the theory. (if i’m wrong please forgive me, i just assume organ harvester shidou = people think he did it as a job)

Anyways, more under the cut for those interested (it's a bit lengthy my apologies)

It then kinda trickles down to how his guilt stems more from the consequences of his actions rather than the actual action of taking organs. The root of his guilt comes from the realization that basically asking families to pull the plug and use their loved ones' organs for donation is a very, very hard decision; one that he kept pressuring for. If he was an illegal organ harvester, and was aware that his actions were in fact illegal, why the hell would he feel so guilty to the point that he’d start having suicidal ideations? That’s the key difference between his profession and his possible criminal activities; one is a burden both emotionally and morally, the other is more or less a literal burden. And based off of Shidou's character, he seems to be much more emotionally affected. That's also why I think a lot of people jump to the conclusion that his guilt stems from his actual actions rather than their effects. (does that make sense oh lord i am going ☝️🤓 so hard rn)

I get that some parts of his MV or lyrics seem to be suggesting that, but also it’s important to note that Shidou has a very strong bias against himself and definitely painted himself in a negative light. I mean, that's why he thinks every single preceding patient before the final incident is a victim to him, why he shows himself staying professional in a professional setting as apathetic (minus the pressuring part), and why he literally equates his job to STEALING. Not only that but, imo, it's also a little too unrealistic and might not actually fit the criteria of Milgram. Milgram is for crimes that are in a morally grey area. So if it really was organ harvesting, is it really in a grey area? (though I guess you could say that doing it for family's sake would be, but that's only for his family. He'd have no reason to do it otherwise). Plus, it'd make more sense and fit the theme of touching upon social issues (i.e. abortion, bullying, societal standards, mental health, etc.) if shidou’s entire dilemma was in regards to (albeit questionably done) organ donation, a complicated ethical topic in Japan.

Throw Down actually gives a pretty good rough idea of Shidou's thoughts towards his crime and his feelings in regards to it. He felt like he was blinded by his own values, and that inadvertently caused him to be unaware of the suffering he caused through his job. It really does shock me that he somehow was able to pull-off getting a forgiven verdict in T1 because he certainly comes off as cold and uncaring in regards to his work.

I think the final bridge in Throw Down kinda summarizes his entire mindset, actually.

​​Now slowly close your eye, put your regret on display Wishing you for someone else's sake With the same expression no matter who comes I don’t feel scared because I don’t know

Shidou doesn't quite understand the feelings of his patient's families, and therefore he acts remorseful and sympathetic more than he actually feels. Why? Well, because he didn't know. Up until that point, he never understood the weight of his actions, and focused on his role as a doctor. "This is an upsetting subject, yes, but it's for the greater good, right?” A braindead person has little to no chances of living, so why not use this as an opportunity to donate their organs? Moreover, as a doctor I believe it’s typical to be "emotionally detached” (for lack of a better word) since I’d assume becoming emotionally connected with a patient would make things at least a bit messy.

His mindset comes crumbling down though, presumably because he experienced the same or a similar situation. This part remains muddy for me, since we don't know much about what the actual cause for Shidou's guilt is. There are several possibilities, with the most plausible ones being:

he lost his own family member and had to go through with the same decision,

he tried to save a family member using donated organs, but failed, making it seem like everything he has done as a doctor was in vain

(a secret third option would be him making someone he cares about make that decision but it's very unlikely and also requires too much mental gymnastics)

But no matter what exactly he did, it all trickles down to the validity of his morals. After realizing the pain of losing a loved one, the struggle of trying to save them, and the unfortunate failure which left all efforts practically pointless, Shidou would understand the actual weight of his actions and why all those families were so reluctant to let go of their own.

This is even more evident in his T2 voice drama, Asclepius.

"In order to save the life of someone you don't know, please let me kill your family," I told them. It doesn't even take much thinking to realize how cruel that is, but… I didn't realize it until the very end.

This is the gist of Shidou's crime, or at least part of it (considering he says "Well, about halfway" when Es asks if their judgment was right). Again, this tells us that Shidou's guilt comes from the act of the effects of organ donation rather than the literal action. And this also implies that his "murders" did in fact have to do with being in a medical situation, it's just the way he went about it was at the very least morally questionable.

I will also acknowledge that he says he killed for selfish reasons, which most likely relates to trying to save his own family member. Here he could possibly have actually done something illegal such as tampering with patients or illegally taking their organs (latter is a stretch imo). Plus, his distorted T2 voice trailer line is literally "You're in the way, hurry up and die" which would only make sense in the context of waiting for a patient to die. But it could also just be him continuing to pressure for organ donation, but now with his own selfish motives.

Going back to the "halfway" comment, while I personally believe it might have to do with how Shidou views his crime as more than just taking organs, it more likely implies that something else happened that Shidou would consider murder. That being the actual death of his family member. It's implied through Throw Down that he was trying to save someone but failed, which he was responsible for. Then from there it'd make sense to assume that he would feel some form of guilt for the rest of his patients, either for the reason of failing to actually utilize donated organs even with the opportunity of being able to save them, or for just realizing the what it actually feels like to have to give up on your loved one. (does. does that make any sense.)

So yeah, I don’t think he’s an organ harvester due to what’s known regarding his crime, the reasoning for his guilt, and with the way he is as a character. The most I’d personally believe is that he decided to harvest organs for the sake of his loved one, but even that seems like a stretch to me. Thus, that is why I believe Kirisaki Shidou is not an organ harvester.

Anyways I’ve rambled on long enough, thank you for reading if you did and remember to drink water and vote shidou innocent in trial 3 because i will shit my pants if he doesn't get inno

[nightsetter]

Aubrey Plaza movie & show reviews

i know i'm not the only one obsessed with aubrey rn so i thought i'd rank some of her stuff that i've seen and indicate whether her character is gay or not to help people decide what to watch. i'll keep adding to it and hope others will add their recommendations too!!

starting with the most recent:

1. Agatha All Along (2024 series) - Gay - 10/10 obviously it's why we're all here haha.

2. Megalopolis (2024 film) - Not gay - worst movie i've ever seen in my life lmao. however you get the incomparable experience of watching a bitchy blonde aubrey plaza sit on a dude's face so. also all her outfits are incredible??? 0/10 don't bother watching, aubrey is only in a few scenes so just skip around to find those.

3. My Old Ass (2024 film) - Gay - 10/10 watch this asap! i laughed i cried, like in the best way. aubrey is only in a couple scenes, a longer one kinda towards the beginning and then a short one at the end, she also does voiceovers throughout. her character is bisexual and the focus is a mlw relationship. she's fantastic in it and the whole movie is excellent, loved maisy stella too and their chemistry together.

4. Operation Fortune (2023 film) - Not gay - action movies aren't usually my thing but aubrey plays the role of a sexy hacker spy like she was born for it and i loved every second haha. i wish the script had lived up to her potential but it was still a fun watch. 8/10 for that one gold dress ALONE

5. Emily the Criminal (2022 film) - Not gay - 10000/10 HIGHLY RECOMMEND my personal favorite so far!!! Aubrey co-produced and she plays the main character. when i tell you this woman had me ACTINGG UPPPPPP in this sweet mother of all that is holy- she looks so good in every scene and it's genuinely great start to finish. boyfriend aubrey plaza save me 🙏

6. Spin Me Round (2022 film) - Gay - ok so this movie is batshit but there's a truly incredible makeout scene with alison brie's character... aubrey is only there for like 1/3 of the movie but she steals every scene and looks soooo good in it, amazing costume design. i'll give it a 6/10 for that and her chemistry with alison.

7. Best Sellers (2021 film) - Not gay - i loved this one!! aubrey's talent and range blew me away, and it's a heartfelt story. she stars as a publishing company heiress who develops a father-daughter bond with an old cranky author. definitely up there with emily the criminal & black bear as some of her best work. 9/10

8. The White Lotus (2021-ongoing series) - Not gay - aubrey stars in season 2, which you can jump right into if you want because each season is a stand-alone story. i enjoyed s1 as a satire about different types of social privilege, s2 was way less interesting and i found myself just waiting for the next time aubrey was on screen lol. but she's amazing in a dramatic role and wears so many bikinis lord forgive meee- 7/10 overall.

9. Happiest Season (2020 film) - Gay - everyone has seen this, but aubrey plaza and kristen stewart in the same movie is WAY too powerful i think i blacked out at one point. alison brie is great too. 8/10 minus a couple because of the stupid ending and idk its a lil cheesy haha.

10. Black Bear (2020 film) - Not gay - another one that she co-produced and starred in. ill be honest it was too straight for me to really enjoy lmao. its a meta dive into the indie film industry that went over my head at times but it's thought-provoking and clearly very personal to aubrey's life and career, especially how she works so closely with her husband. she is insanely insanely hot in it and really showcases her talent so ill give it a 7/10.

11. Child's Play (2019 film) - Not gay - tbh i thought this movie was hilarious loll. aubrey stars as the mom, i wish there'd been more of a focus on her, it's more from the son's perspective but she's awesome in it and it's cool to see her in a different type of role. 6/10 it was good as far as slasher comedies go.

12. An Evening With Beverly Luff Linn (2018 film) - Not gay - i dont even know what to say about this one dlkjfdl. 1/10 aubrey is the only good part.

13. The Little Hours (2017 film) - Gay - bro this one is a RIDE... aubrey plaza as a crazy heretical nun is one of the funniest things i've everrrr seen. she co-produced and stars in it again with alison brie. hilarious movie for its target audience (me), aubrey kisses 2 women and there's one scene in particular that uhh 🥵 well. no sorry i mustn't say. 10/10 movie (in my very subjective opinion loll). tw for sexual assault.

14. Ingrid Goes West (2017 film) - Not gay - she co-produced and stars in this opposite elizabeth olsen. aubrey is always at home playing freakish characters and the movie is pretty entertaining. i was disappointed by the glaring lack of gay subtext haha but ill give it a 7/10. tw for attempted suicide.

15. Legion (2017-2019 series) - only a couple episodes into this but i'm absolutely loving it so far, aubrey is soo hottt when she's in her element omfg. her character is queer and she appears in 22/27 episodes according to wiki. i'll update with a final rating.

16. Addicted to Fresno (2015 film) - Gay - aubrey plays the love interest to natasha lyonne's character in this. she's only in a handful of scenes and their chemistry wasnt great imo. it has a happy ending though and it's a fun like black comedy rom com, there's one cute kiss at the end. plus sweaty gym clothes 😶 i'll give it a 5/10.

17. The To Do List (2013 film) - Not gay - i probably would have liked this more when i was in high school haha but it's still pretty funny. she plays the nerdy main character experimenting with guys for the first time, so. a lot of what would you would expect with that 😭 god is real that's all i can tell you, 7/10

18. Parks and Recreation (2009-2015 series) - Not gay - this is the one she's famous for of course but for anyone who hasn't seen it, she gets a decent amount of screen time in an ensemble cast playing an adorably chaotic intern. 8/10 recommend if you're looking for a half hour sitcom, it's a great time :)

19. Criminal Minds (2005-ongoing series) - Gay - i only watched 4 episodes so can't speak on the quality of the show as a whole but i loved her soo much in it. she plays a femme fatale hitwoman which is the perfect aubrey role lmao. there are mentions of her relationships with women, but the focus is on her interest in a guy. She stars in 11x11, 12x22, and 15x6. also makes a brief appearance at the end of 12x21. 8/10 no complaints, totally worth watching for her.

i hope this is helpful to someone and please add more reviews if you'd like!

[taffybee]

not that anyone's asking BUT my hot take on giovanni is he should be retired rn. not from like a "the pokemon company should stop talking about him" (weeeeelll that's sort of part of it but. hear me out) kind of way BUT in a. he should LITERALLY not be doing team rocket shit in ANY canon universe anymore. and it would be TOTALLY in-character of him to do so if the medias still using him characterized him the way he should be. welcome to my ted talk let me explain myself

FULL DISCLOSURE: i like giovanni. like, a not normal amount i fear. all of that opening sounds like i don't but i totally feel stupid emotions about this guy. anyways:

GEN 1. gen 1 games are like... NOT known for their compelling dialogue. and in cases like archie and maxie in gen 3 getting remakes in gen 6, their characterization and dialogue gets (kind of subjectively but i feel this is a popular opinion anyways) Much Better. i think that goes for a Lot of stuff where they give old guys new dialogue in spin offs (gestures at masters ex which i think is Great for making characters Actually Interesting)

but i feel like with giovanni there's been a DOWNGRADE in character since his appearance because he no longer Progresses.

i WILL say masters ex does Some Work to try and make him Deeper than just "I'm Evil for the sake of Being Evil grahgghh 😈" but it's like. overshadowed by All The Other Stuff.

plus he IS rainbow rocket giovanni in masters and i'm like OBSESSEDDD with team rainbow rocket. but i also don't think it should. Exist. I'M GLAD IT DOES but i find it out of character for giovanni to do At All. I CAN EXPLAIN I PROMISE.

team rocket's goals as an organization are and always have been: make money via stealing or otherwise exploiting pokémon. that's all it NEEDED to be. because it was gen 1 and no one needed to be ripping apart the universe yet.

giovanni himself sees pokemon as a means to an end. that much has stayed consistent in all of his appearances. but what CHANGES things in what happens when he LOSES for the FINAL TIME in r/b/y:

I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE TO THE STUDY OF POKEMON. that's like CRAZY sort of redemption. and you Could argue against me to say "well have you considered he was lying" and i Have but i think it's SO much cooler if he was being legit. if he was so Changed by losing So Many Times to a little boy who just cared So Much for his pokémon that he needed to experience that for himself.

I mentioned in my previous giovanni post that pokémon origins has characterized giovanni "right" and THAT'S because via continuously fighting red and seeing his passion for battling as well as his love of pokémon firsthand, giovanni rediscovers his lost passion for pokémon that he had when HE was younger, and he sees HIMSELF in who red is and decides to disband team rocket after their gym battle so he can turn his life around. i HIGHLY recommend watching episode 3 of origins if you haven't seen it. it's freaking Marvelous.

ANYWAYS. THIS is the characterization of giovanni i support the MOST because it's not terribly complicated but still has nice depth to his character that you could read into.

BUT if we're going by this characterization of him, he should. NOT BE DOING TEAM ROCKET STUFF NOW! he SHOULD have been retired storywise by game freak after that and retired job-wise. studying pokémon and touching grass.

but THEN. gen 2 happens. (... well, gen 2 and the first gens 1/2 remakes.)

gen 2 introduces the concept of "let's bring giovanni back". which i wouldn't complain about if giovanni wasn't ALSO trying to get back. WHY. WE ESTABLISHED IN THE FIRST GAME HE'S DONE. and gen 2 didn't DIRECTLY SAY giovanni was up to come back (as far as i'm aware, i did NOT play gsc, someone correct me if i'm wrong). but when frlg released, they Changed dialogue from the original to FIT this idea:

NOW "studying pokemon" has become "training". there IS no character development for him here, he JUST wants to get stronger to be a Better mob boss. and this is supported by the celebi time travel event where he's ABOUT to rejoin team rocket before you beat him

the big problem with this (and any giovanni dialogue in the time travel event) for me is that it frames everything that happened to him in gen 1 as "giovanni wasn't a good enough mob boss then but now that he's had some time to Train he's ready to be a Better Mob Boss" WRONG! THAT WAS NEVER THE ISSUE!! part of the pros of team rocket at its peak was that giovanni was Unknown to most and could direct operations in the shadows AND he could keep his business as a gym leader because NO ONE KNEW. but now EVERYONE knows and team rocket can LITERALLY NEVER REACH THAT PEAK AGAIN. the ONLY CORRECT thing to do in this situation is Disband and Do Other Shit (cough cough study pokémon and touch grass cough cough)

this seems obvious to me that this desire to keep dragging him back into things is the games way of being like "woaahh!! callback time!!" and then later down the line "woaaahh!! nostalgia time!!!" (because they wouldn't have retconned that final gen 1 dialogue if it wasn't) and while i can Appreciate it to a degree (because i am Not Immune to getting STUPID EXCITED when old blorbos show up) i think continuing to make giovanni show up to Be Evil isn't the way to go about it. or at LEAST not canon timeline giovanni.

and the gen 1/2 remakes for ME is like... the beginning of the issue, but as we've gotten Further Away from gen 1 in time, the more i feel they stray from where he ended in the original in favor of making him More Blandly Evil. he feels constrained to one-liners about how the worlds an EVIL PLACE and he's just playing the game or whatever alpha sigma shit he's on in the masters trainer lodge

rainbow rocket is kind of CRAZY to me because they take this mob boss who likes exploiting pokemon and scientists for money and they make him start. opening interdimensional bad ending au wormholes to take over the world with aliens. (also having him willing to share the power with all the other evil bosses, some who have in their universes Successfully taken over the world??? heeeellll no. not even my proposed toned down characterization of this guy would be cool with that realistically.) it all just seems to be Way Beyond what team rocket SHOULD be doing. they're The Mafia. making The Mafia open wormholes is CRAZY. but giovanni HAS to be the main guy because. Nostalgia.

idk how much sense i make when i say this but when you make team rocket less cunning and less focused on doing their work in the shadows and running their shady operations stealthily. you get. a more ambitious team skull. and there's nothing WRONG with team skull but it's NOT WHAT TEAM ROCKET IS SUPPOSED TO BE. they've got more of a reputation than that but modern depictions of giovanni and the organization as a whole water him down to "i love Causing Problems" and less "i love Good Business"

whatever. giovanni in modern depictions MAKES SENSE if you followed along the slow regression of his character in real time. but i feel like if you look where he is now and look where he Ended in r/b/y you have like. Two Different Characters. and i think having a redeemed or even kind-of-half-redeemed giovanni could be SO much more interesting in showing up again than having him be Generally Evil

AND IT'S NOT LIKE THAT REALLY POSES ISSUES FOR MASTERS EX. cyrus is half-reformed WITHIN the story. archie and maxie too (although they were already kind of like that). lysandre HAS an evil moment but he DOESN'T DIE like he does in canon and THEN he's FINE. he still "runs" team flare but he's NOT LONGER A THREAT TO THE PROTAGONISTS

what i think COULD'VE been cool in some hypothetical scenario is have giovanni come back for cameos but Not as team rocket's leader. have him Turn Down the rocket admin radio broadcast. hell, having him come back to help the player Stop Them if he feels particularly annoyed. LET THAT MAN GO ON VACATION. WHATEVER. there's SO MUCH you can do with him the way cameos are done for the Other non-evil characters and there are options where you could Still battle him as a Test Of Strength but THERE'S JUST. SO MUCH WRONG WITH HIM STILL BEING OVERTLY EVIL.

i understand keeping giovanni evil for nostalgia. i Get it i PROMISE i do. i just think it makes him a weaker character, and the companies sacrifice character development for sales. but if you wanted to have a bad guy who was JUST BAD and would CONTINUE to be bad if given the chance,

GHETSIS IS. RIGHT THERE.

that's the end of that for me i think. i'm SO down to discuss or debate this take for fun. i just think giovanni should retire and pet his cat because it's funny.

[gavisuntiedboot]

Gavi Fluff Alphabet

The long awaited and highly requested. I can't bring myself to write smut rn tbh. Like my head is pounding and I'm about to vom. So sexy. Please keep expectations in the dirt so I can exceed them with my sleepy writing.

~~~

a = affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

I don't think Pablo is the type to show much affection in public

He's still quite young and shy, not eager to be teased in person or online about PDA

I think affection in public would be limited to hand-holding, maybe a side hug

Even the gentlemen stuff would escape him in an effort not to come across too sappy.

Like he'll hold your bags, but you're getting your own doors

In private though? Man is a teddy bear

Attached to you

Always wants to be touching you in some way - sitting too close, laying on your lap, anything

Will actually pout if he's not given kisses and affection hourly

b = best friend (what would they be like as a best friend?)

Scary dog privileges but as a person

Would always be FaceTiming you just to have your presence there in the background

Sends you at least 20 tiktoks a day because they remind him of you

Always pays when y'all are out

c = cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

Absolutely necessary

Actually so touch starved that he might die without some quality time from you

Started out with you wrapping yourself around his shoulders to get his attention (since he's confirmed always on his phone)

Now you'll be minding your business and feel him wrap his arms around you

Like to be the baby, laying on top of you, getting his hair played with

Prefers when neither of you have a proper shirt on so the two of you can share body heat

Must be a separate activity from sleeping - Gavi get's too hot and restless in his sleep to cuddle

Age regression - literally a little puppy when he’s in your arms, responding in nods and whimpers

d = domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they around the house?)

Pablo cannot imagine settling down right now

He loves his youth and his job and his freedom

But looking at you in his house, laying on his couch or waking up next to him, he thinks he could get used to this

Quite lazy around the house tbh

Regular teenage boy; does the bare minimum to not be living in filth

Very good about one thing: dishes.

Fun fact: gavi seems like the type to be afraid of cockroaches and other critters, so he’s amazing at doing everything to prevent them from entering his house

Baby steps towards domesticity: letting you stay over, then buying you a toothbrush, then a drawer, then a key to the front door

e = ending (if they had to break up with their s/o, how would they do it?)

Pablo is not good at feelings or confrontation

So if he ever needed to break up with a girl, he would do it indirectly

Probably over text or through a phone call, because he doesn’t know how to handle heartbreak

If it was in person, he would do it in public, buying you a meal or coffee before breaking the news

He would always repeat how it’s a problem with him, how he needed to figure himself out, and how there was no blame on you

Getaway car waiting outside

f = fiancé (how would they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

Rather terrifying prospect for pablito

Wants to have his own accomplishments in his career before he looks to lock you down

Type to give you a promise ring on a necklace

“Princesa, im going to be the best someday, and you deserve nothing but the best. So wait for me until I get there?”

Not the type to do long engagements - as long as it takes to plan the wedding and that’s all

Once he proposes, he wants you to be his as soon as possible - Mrs. Gavira can’t come soon enough

g = gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Physically? Not so gentle

Forgets that he’s gone through a bulk period and he now has a lot of muscle

Still play fights like he’s a scrawny 14 year old, occasionally being too harsh

Everything is a little too intense but that’s what makes it Gavi

His hugs are a little tight on your ribs, his grip restricting the blood flow to your hand slightly

But you love it all the same because it’s him

Emotionally tho? My man is a marshmallow over an open flame

Still young and rather volatile - emotions are right on the surface

His happiness is immediate and overflowing, radiating even

But when he’s sad or anxious? His whole being changes

Sad eyes, dropped shoulders, crossed arms - be was a different person

Tries to be as gentle as possible with your feelings because he didn’t want to lose you or compromise what y’all have

Also wants to establish a dynamic where you two are gentle with each other

Because otherwise he’ll break down and close off from you entirely

h = hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

Any Gavi girl knows what I’m about to say

Man loves hugs

Adores them

Occur every time he sees you

What type of hug?? Girl

You know the one

One arm around the waist, securing you to his chest

The other around your head, bringing you in gently to rest beneath his chin

And of course it’s couple with that little smooth on the side of the head

For hello, good bye, good luck, and I L*** Y**, this was his delivery message of choice

Sometimes Pablo will pull you in for long hugs where he can just breathe you in, enjoying the feeling of you in his arms

Always ended with a sweet kiss on the top of your forehead, eyes meeting yours to describe what you should call your situation

i = i love you (how fast do they say the L-word?)

Okay so someone please educate me - is saying I love you like a big moment in other cultures?

Like I’m Arab, and saying بحبك for the first time is not a huge thing

So I think that would influence when he says it out loud

But I think Pablo would take a while to realize that he’s in love

He’s young and doesn’t really understand the feeling of being in love with someone else

I think it would take a good 6-8 months before he would be able to look at you and think “wow. So this is what being in love feels like.”

j = jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they're jealous?)

Controversial opinion: I don’t think Gavi would be the type to get jealous quickly

I know I know but before you get the pitchforks lemme explain

Everyone talks about how Gavi doesn’t get nervous or really doubt himself

He knows he’s hot shit okay?

Both on the field and off, he’s confident in what he brings to the table

So when he gets a girl, he’s gonna be confident in that as well, knowing that he was able to pull her

He gets a kick watching guys flirt with you, because he knows that you’ll never give them the time of day

The only time he might get jealous is when you fawn over another man in front of him

Especially if it’s another footballer

He’s the type to pout and get quiet, scowling at the thought of you all giddy about someone else

Would pull you onto his lap and ask you in a soft voice

“You’re happy with me right?”

Just needs a little bit of reassurance that he’s doing everything in his power to be the best for you

k = kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss their partner? where do they like to be kissed?)

Not to be predictable, but I think he would love kissing you on the neck and the forehead

Like he seems like the type to give you affectionate kisses on the cheek and stuff rather than kissing on the lips all the time

The type to kiss the back of your hand, the top of your head, your bare shoulder

Just a thousand little pecks everywhere

Will grab your face with both hands and give you a fat kiss when he’s feeling excited

otherwise, he’s quite gentle in the way he kisses you

Soft lips moving against yours slowly, takes a while to warm up to intense making out (in the session not overall - hes 18 )

Likes to be kissed on cheek and on the neck

Loves when you sit on his lap and kiss him deeply

l = little ones (how are they around children?)

You’d think he’d not be great with kids because he’s young and kind of aggressive

But you and me both have seen the videos of him in the hospital

So sweet and gentle with the young ones

Loves to pick them up and put them on his shoulders

Very patient with little kid nonsense

Can’t help but think about having his own kids one day

Tells you off handedly that’s he’s excited to be a father one day

“You think our kids will be good at football?”

m = morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

Hectic

Very energetic in the morning on account of having training so early

Always practically jumping out of bed ready to go

Wakes you up by squeezing you tightly and kissing all over your face

Makes sure you eat in the morning no matter how much you object

n = nights (how are nights spent with them?)

On weekdays, Pablo is fucking tired

Comes home ready to pass the fuck out from training

Lots of eating dinner on the couch and lazy nights

Ready to go to bed by like 10pm

Gets very childish and cranky when he’s tired - lots of pouting and whining to go to sleep

On weekends, he’s a little more enthused

Ready to go out to a restaurant or club with you and have fun

Still keeps things within limits - no blacking out or throwing up

o = open (when would they start revealing things about themselves?)

A while y’all

Pablo is a great listener - loves to hear about you and your interests

But about himself? He’s not a fan

Gets too shy and nervous - thinks he’s boring or bothering you with details about his life

Stuff will slip here and there when he’s stressed, and he starts blushing immediately upon realizing he’s over shared

Starts warming up to you 3-4 months in, just with little tid bits about his family and early life

More likely to speak to you when you were cuddled up, playing with his hair, running your fingers up and down his arm

p = patience (how easily angered are they?)

Be for real y’all

My man has little to no patience

Very short fuse

Was a major point of tension early in the relationship

Quick to anger, but also quick to calm down

Doesn’t dwell on things and it’s always ready to move on

Learning to be more calm and patient with you

q = quizzes (how much would they remember about their partner?)

Takes learning about you very seriously

Always super interested when you speak, completely taken by you

Makes notes in his phone about everything: your favorite flowers, dream vacation spots, and more

Interestingly enough, forgets super simple things about you, like your favorite color

r = remember (what is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

There were so many little domestic moments that Gavi loved experiencing with you

But the one moment he treasured the most with you was the first time you went to Sevilla with him

Your laughter, your energy, just lit up his hometown

He loved watching your interactions with his family and friends

You both were laying in bed in his parents’ house, just laying with you and being silly when you talked about how much you missed the beach

“The beach is only like an hour away. We can go tomorrow morning if you want.”

You looked at him with wide eyes, smiling from ear to ear

The following morning, you woke up to Gavi running around

He already had everything packed in the car

His newly licensed ass drove you to the beach, and you just played around like kids

You sat on the sand, laying on Pablo’s shoulder

“Pablo, this is the best day ever.”

He pushed your hair behind your ear and kissed you deeply

His heart physically swelled whenever he thought about that moment

s = security (how protective are they? would they like to be protected?)

Super protective of you when he feels like you could be hurt

Whenever you two were out at somewhere rowdy, he always had a hand on you

Ready to fight anybody that touched you

Honestly felt a little emasculated whenever you tried to protect him

Got irritated whenever you fussed over him and his injuries

Started to warm up to it after he got a cut on his face, liking you babying him and being so close to his face

t = try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Initially, he wasn’t trying very hard

Just being a teenager really - simple dates and texting a lot

“Pablo, when are we going to go on a real date?”

The question threw him off immensely, causing him to consult his teammates about what classifies as a date

He realized he had been severely lacking in the effort department

Started trying harder - restaurants, cute picnics, thoughtful gifts

You had started thinking he had done something wrong and was trying to compensate

u = ugly (what would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Homie is a S L O B

Like does not pick up after himself at all

Not a problem until you start staying over at his place

He has to remove piles of clothes from the bed just for you two to sleep

He’s also always on his phone

Can’t put it down

Can get really annoying when you’re trying to talk to him and he’s staring at his screen

v = vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

In the face, Gavi is not supper confident in his looks

He’s a little insecure that he still looks so young

Wants to look more mature

His body tho????

Yeah, homie knows he’s fine

FOINE

He’s worked hard on his physique, and so he’s confident in the fruits of his efforts

Loves sitting shirtless around the house

You catch him staring at himself in reflective surfaces

Would never say it out loud, but knows he’s got a body to drool over, and uses it to his advantage

w = whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

I don’t think so

Gavi needs to play football to be complete

That’s the only thing I think he could lose that would make it feel like a piece of his soul was missing

You didn’t complete his world - you were a different world entirely

When you weren’t around, it just felt like he was stuck in a routine

x - xtra (a random headcanon for them.)

Pablo loves seeing you in Barça merch

He just thinks it’s the culmination of all his life coming together when he sees you in the blaugrana

You have a pair of Barça sweats that be especially loves

Literally so careless with all your clothes except your merch

Washes it per label instructions, never rips it off you - the whole nine

y = yuck (what are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)

Hates people who are stuck up

Needs a girl to be down to earth - he’s not making that much money

Can’t deal with anyone uptight either - needs someone willing to just go with the flow

z = zzz (what is a sleep habit of theirs?)

As mentioned previously, gets very hot in his sleep

Can’t cuddle or be too close because man will sweat and stay up all night

Has had a habit of kicking the blankets off since he was a kid

Had to adjust when you started staying over because you would be freezing and curled into a ball in the morning

Has the room super cold and sleeps basically naked when you’re there so he doesn’t get the urge to kick the sheets to the floor

~~

Guys I’m so sleeeeeepyyyyyyyyyy so hope your expectations were low. Also just realized that people schedule things to be posted. Like not everyone posts their fics the second they finish at crackhead hours like me. Oh well.

[midnight-mourning]

I won’t lie, saw your post about how things are scary rn in the U.S. and… idrk what’s going on. Been avoiding it like the plague bc i’m afraid of the information i’m currently ignorant to. As someone who dwells on “what ifs” it scares me to know what is going on but at the same time i wanna know what’s happening since i live in the U.S too. Just wanted to share this. I feel bad bc of the fact that i been ignoring it, so i do wanna know what’s going on. I just want someone to tell it to me in a way that doesn’t feel like i’m being attacked for avoiding it bc i’m too afraid to learn the information by myself. But there may be some people like me out there.

Hi there, that's absolutely valid, it's been a bit of a mess and some miscommunications have occurred already (as typical always every 4 years here) and wanting to avoid all of it isn't unreasonable. Acknowledging but avoiding a subject is completely different than denial, and that's totally okay, I don't judge. I'll do my best to explain in a way that makes sense and that's hopefully helpful

Before anything else, let me preface this by saying that I am NOT a political scientist, I am NOT an expert in anyway regarding politics in the slightest, anything that I share below is based on my personal experience and research so please keep that in mind, I highly encourage you to check out the sources below for any further information. Having said that, here's what we know:

According to The Associated Press, and other news outlets, the current president elect is Donald Trump with 292 of the electoral college votes, races have not been called in AZ, NV, ME and AK.

Harris is set to give a concession speech at 4 pm EST today.

Republicans have control of the senate with 52 seats, with democrats having lost 3 seats and currently have 43. 5 remaining races have yet to be called. Currently, they are projected to be filled by Democrats by Associated Press and 270 to Win.

The house is currently still a toss up, 270 to Win projects 209 (D) to 213 (R) for 20 of the remaining 33 uncalled races. Again, 13 races are still a toss-up at this point in time.

Sources for more information:

If you would like more information regarding live coverage, as well as general, unbiased reporting, Associated Press is (in my opinion) the most accurate and unbiased source of information.

If you would like to see current projections for the remaining races, Associated Press and 270 to win appear (emphasis on appear) to have the most accurate reporting.

If you want to see live coverage and discussion, or to see how things unfolded last night, CNN did have a broadcast going last night that was free to watch. It appears they've now taken it down. If I happen to find said broadcast I'll update the post with it as they do a good job of explaining things state by state, precint by precint. However, much like any other media outlet, they can be prone to bias (left-leaning) and potentially to fear mongering. Should you seek out CNN or any other news outlet besides those above please keep in mind that reporting may be influenced in certain ways because of this.

Having said all that, here's what I personally think this means and what can still happen, with facts mixed in for reference. Much of this is my opinion and should not be taken as fact unless it's cited. Again, not an expert, just someone with a very very basic understanding of politics and government.

With the win of the presidency and the senate, republicans are at the advantage. With senate control they will be able to assist with choosing the next presidental cabinet, and should there be a vacancy on the supreme court, assist with that.

However, if democrats can take control of the house, the win will be massive, and leave them able to have some say in the next 4 years, but nothing is for certain at this point in time

Democrats potentially have at least a little breathing room in the senate, they're not majority, but only 4 seats difference is better than nothing

We've gotten through a Trump presidency before, the situation then, as well as the feeling everyone has now is exactly the same. We made it through then, and we can make it through again

The senate is only guaranteed to be controlled by Republicans until the 2026 midterms, two years is a long time, but it's only two years

Having lived through the last Trump term in my teens and remember it well, yes he managed to do some pretty awful things, but he also undelivered in several ways, we can only hope the same thing happens this time around, this would be especially true should democrats take the House

He won't be back, if he makes it through the term he'll be too old and his health won't be great. Republicans didn't want him this time, they won't want him the next.

JD Vance and so many others will still be kicking long after he's gone though, and that needs to be in the back of people's heads when we get closer to 2028

Trump made a lot of empty promises he didn't keep before, and personally I don't think he beleves half the things he says, he just says it because he knows others do believe it. Giving up hope now for a better tomorrow won't make a better tomorrow, hoping despite it all will. Giving up also gives people like him exactly what they want, and I'm not about to do that, neither should you.

For now, be vigilant, stay safe, but try to relax. Doom-scrolling, wondering what might happen, and so on, is pointless because at this point, we don't know. Anything could happen, this election is a clear example of that.

Hope this was able to help, anon. We're all in this together, and as long as that remains true, we're going to be okay. Highly recommend after reading this to do what's best for you, be that choosing to find out more through the sources above or continue to avoid it. Personally, I'm getting together with some friends this evening to study, chat, and chill and decompress from it all, hopefully you can do something similar if you need to 💜

[thecluelessdoctor]

ok ok fine I'll make the rant I've been planning for like.. a week now.

It's about time I talk about Helluva Boss, It's fandom, and it's creators themselves.

i personally really love helluva boss, even though it definitely has fallen short since the last season. I think the most recent episode is probably going to be their best one and they'll go back to falling. but, personally, I like the show! It's goofy and when it's not being srs, it does it's jokes well! Normally. There is one joke I hate though (if yk, yk. It's in happy campers 💀) ANYWAY

Character design in the show is... okay?? I guess???ammon looks like a Christmas tree so idk man.

But we aren't here to talk about the show itself rn. I just had to say some praises before I start bashing it otherwise stans will come after me and that's not a fun brawl.

ANYWAY *SLAMS ON UR DESK* AA

I wanna talk about it's fans. Some of its fans are really chill (like myself) and only get stirred up if something really bad is being made of is happening. But other fans are more.. intense. It's in every fandom so I won't say too too much on it, but yall- stans please chill out- let bigons be bigons endless its something immoral. (Like more than murder. Yk what I mean)

The major reason I wanted to make this is to talk about Viv, and spindlehorse in general. Mainly because of my recent AU, I really need to make this clear.

I do not support Vivziepop, or any of viv's actions.

Ive been reading about all the controversy and discourse involving her and Brandon (yeah he's not innocent here don't act like he is) (we will only be talking about recent things, basically from Hazbin to now)

And jts.. something.

Abusive work, transphobia, ablelism, favoritism etc etc. yeah so that's fun.. it's hard to know what is stated is true or not, so I'll just settle on saying this

Viv is juvenility petty. Like, I'm still pretty young, but this is just insane. I grew out of these behaviors by 11ish, and I'm still younger than 16. She's what- 30ish now?!? She shouldn't be acting the way she is at her age, just saying.

I also wanna touch a bit on Brandon (even though I know less about him than I do Viv) but I.. highly dislike how people are claiming Brandon to be innocent and Viv isnt. Like- that's not fair. Let me point this out, viv and Brandon are working TOGETHER on this, all the writing and shit. Meaning Brandon also gave the "yeah this is good" to all of her petty shit.

Anyway let me wrap up by saying don't attack anyone mentioned or implied here, because doing that is cringe and it just waists your time. Anyway I'm dotty, and I'm a homosexual

[pastel-medic]

//Really brief vent (mention of depression)

Just a small vent on some personal emotions cuz I've been feeling really stressed and maybe that's feeding into my current mental mindset rn

As I've said before tho I won't be making these kinds of posts much because I want to keep my mental health private from my art posts. I'm making this post cuz it's been on my mind for a while and causing me some doubt in myself

So I found out about a week ago that my Medicsona looks similar to someone else's oc, and I first learned about this oc through an attack on Art Fight. I assumed the artist of the oc was a bit upset about the similarities from the frowny face they put in the art, and I feel a bit awkward and don't know how to feel about it. I've recently been trying hard not to look too deep into tones in text cuz it often makes me nervous. Maybe I'm being anxious and just reading into something that isn't a big deal.

I've contemplated changing Shortcake's design a couple times but I'm so attached to how I've designed him. I don't want to change it just because I feel conflicted over this. Idk I've been having a few depressive episodes about myself as an artist lately, and I often find myself feeling unoriginal. The artist of the oc is really nice, but I can't shake the feeling that I've made them feel upset somehow. I know I shouldn't dwell on what others think but I'm a highly empathetic person and unfortunately a people pleaser. It's likely just my fluff brain being mean to me again.

Idk vent is over tho I don't want to think about this too much rn, it's more of a self-worth thing for me to heal personally on my own

[n0v4t33z]

The Piece Of Eight - Chapter of Eledonia

Pairings: Capt. Hongjoong X Female Reader , Crewmate San x Female Reader (Overall not chapter specific)

Genre: Pirate AU, Romance, historical-ish, Action, Angst, Non-Idol AU

Word Count: 10.6k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Violence, Language, mentions of blood and gore, Highly Suggestive at times (This is a warning for the whole story overall)

Chapter specific: y/n uses her sword on Matz, y/n protects Matz from a fellow villager and cuts him a bit in the process, y/n remembers her traumatic past, Seonghwa mentions Hongjoong's past (Overall nothing too bad right now honestly)

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

Spotify Playlist ⚓ | Masterlist 🏴‍☠️

Author's Note💌: Hi! This is one of my newer works and I hope whoever reads this enjoys it! I've worked very hard on this and tbh i've been working on this when I'm not writing for TS (which is alot because I'm stuck as of rn) Also I guess I'll say this right now but this story will have alot of blood and violence in the future chapters and in some instances flashbacks from MC's tragic past which will get VERY dark. I am aware not alot of people like that so before any of it starts I will warn you in future chapters of any trigger warnings. Anyway, please enjoy and don't be shy to leave me your comments or thoughts! (please be kind!) 🌙

✦•·····································•✦•·····································•✦

For as long as I can remember I’ve always been poor, not that it’s bothered me. If anything it has made me very resourceful and grateful for the little things I have in life, but it definitely would have been nice if we at least had something under our name because maybe then being prisoners for years wouldn’t have been an option. 

Then again everything that happened was against Eledonia's wishes so of course, that of being a prisoner was long ago from when I was 4 years old until I was about 13 so having to endure and watch all those years of people getting abused and tortured again and again on the daily definitely takes a toll on you. Lucky for me I put that anger I had in learning how to protect myself and my family.

 For a while my family was against it because according to them I should be focusing on something else that won’t risk me getting hurt, like being a good housewife. The way I think though is if I didn’t at least know the basics of training we’d suffer again like before and when the Saitors left our country that’s when it began.

 Now my grandpa, a retired soldier of our nation Eledonia has been training me for a few years now. He’s taught me everything I know about weapons and self defense. For the most part I train by myself by the shore near where our village is so I can hear the calming waves and stay watch in case any ship is nearby. Which is what I'm on my way to do this morning.

"Make sure not to stay too late over there, I need you to help me take these beans over to the market to see how much we can get for them" I nod "Sure, I'll be back later Mom!" I walk outside as the early morning sun slightly obstructs my vision causing me to slightly squint trying to get used to the brightness.

 While I walk down the trail I take in the beauty of the forest and see how much the flowers and leaves on the trees have bloomed since spring began, everything was so lush and green. As soon as I’m hit with the smell of the salty sea it’s my queue that I’ve arrived at my destination with no need to look over at the sea for confirmation which unknowingly at the time I’ll seemingly regret.

 I begin my training as per usual until a few hours pass by and I begin to hear shouting in the distance and splashes in the water almost like a ship was being docked. I run towards the edge of the shore and realize a man was watching me with his spyglass.

I couldn't make out his features but panicking now knowing how long he’d been watching me I start sprinting back home with adrenaline coursing through my veins. It takes me less than 5 minutes to arrive at my village's territory before I begin to yell in panic “A ship is docking!! They’re pirates!”

The villagers look at each other in confusion and panic until I spot the chief. I run as fast my legs could take me but my legs feels weak from the Imminent fear. At this point I don't know how I'm still standing.

 “Chief there are pirates docking their ship right now!! Please anyone! One of them looked right at me, they know there are people here now! ”

 Immediately the Chief rings a bell 3 times then walks over to me gently placing his hand on my shoulder “Thank you for telling me Metztli, run to gather your family and we’ll all head over to the underground cave.”

 I obediently nod and hurriedly run home and notice my mom feeding my little brothers  while my father and grandfather were having some sort of conversation then while still slightly out of breath I say “There’s a ship docking right now and it’s a pirate ship, we have to go..” 

Everyone freezes for a moment then my grandfather lets out a sigh and gets up “Let’s go. Leave everything as it is.” My parents begin packing a few things meanwhile I grab a few of my books and some of my clothes enough for a few days. 

When we arrive at the underground cave I notice the whole clan was there, of course our clan wasn’t very big but to see everyone gathered up there was shocking to see how many people were scared of the same thing happening all over again. Of course I don’t blame them, it was a time none of us want to remember. 

The inside of the bunker of the cave was far from fancy, it was basically a hole in the ground with a few torches on the walls for light and a few scattered bonfires for warmth and cooking, everything else was just rock.

 After a week in the bunker we all grew impatient and very hungry so the chief sent a few people out at dawn to see if the boat was gone, when the men came back they alerted the chief the boat was gone from where it was docked marking it safe for us to return back to our homes.

That very same day after returning home my mother sends me off to the market to buy a few necessities we ran out of while in the underground bunker. When I arrived at the market I realized I had a smile on my face, it was nice seeing everyone going back to normal. It was definitely a close call, it still doesn’t sit right with me how one of the people in that ship saw me. 

Luckily they’re long gone by now so I shouldn’t think about it too much. I walk over to a vegetable stand with a small old lady running it “Oh hi sweetie, how are you? What would you like today?” I smile and hand her the crescents along with the reusable grocery bag  “It’ll be the usual Rosalia.”

 She smiles and begins to load up the bag with vegetables “Aren’t you glad that ship was false alarm? I don’t think my old self could handle another invasion again honestly.” I nod “Another one would be a curse that was so scary, my heart almost jumped out of my throat when I saw them.”

 She hands me the grocery bag and says “Luckily it wasn’t anything to worry about sweetheart. Alright, be safe and go ahead and let your mother know I said hi.” I nod and wave goodbye and head over to the next vendor to buy my grandfather’s favorite snack, coconut candy.

 Although I really dislike the weirdly textured candy my grandpa seems to enjoy it and honestly that’s okay as long as he’s happy.

“Oh hi y/n what brings you here today?” I set bag of vegetables on the floor and dig into my pocket for money “Oh I’ll just have one coconut candy today for my grandpa” He grabs the candy and hands it over to me “One crescent”

 I nod and hand him the money and begin to walk away “y/n, wait up!” Causing me to halt in my steps and turn that’s when he wraps a small piece of cake and puts it in a small box and hands it over to me “It’s not much but it’s a small thanks for alerting the chief about the ship earlier this week” 

I reach over for the box with a “Oh wow thank you so much Armando, you have no idea how grateful i am for this.” I bow my head slightly and he does the same “Goodbye y/n take care!” I smile and wave goodbye and begin to walk towards the entrance of the market that’s when I see two young men around my age wearing unfamiliar attire.

 The shorter one’s hair was an unnatural shade of blonde with his hair being short in the front but long in the back, a small braid adorning his hair. His dark eyes are rimmed to resemble smoky soot stained eyes giving him a very intense look, he wore a simple cross chain around his neck and a single silver earring on his right ear, and wore a black odd looking cape thing and under it he wore a simple black long sleeve, on his left arm there was a black band of some sort that had an hourglass shape with a circle in the middle and 4 phases of the moon surrounding it. 

He also wore some sort of black pants accentuating his small figure. For the one standing next to him which was the taller one, his hair was jet black, and wore very similar style clothing only this one opted for a white colored long sleeve shirt and a grey colored vest over it to accentuate his small waist with the same sort of odd black cape thing over his shoulders.

 His pants being the same ones as the short one just iike their boots. One thing that stuck out is the tall one had a visible weapon on his back, a shot gun.

Fuck. Pirates. The shorter one leans over to tell the taller one something and that’s when the taller one begins walking in my direction. I have no weapons on me, I have to go. I drop my stuff and make a run for it into the forest. 

While I run I hear the man call out to me in the distance but unfortunately my fear is not letting me decipher what he was saying. I begin to run in the direction of the river by the water fall but take the alternate lesser known route.

 When I make it to the river I hide behind the waterfall that’s when I hear the tall man call out to me “Hello? I promise we won’t hurt you. We just want to talk.” I scoff almost laughing at his words. Not hurt me? Then why was he hoisting around a fucking shot gun on his back? 

I decide to stay quiet while he continued to try and lure me out then a few minutes later the shorter man with the arm band joins him at the side of the river and he joins him with the same words the other was protesting saying that they will not hurt me which is honestly hard to believe as I can now see the shorter one has weapons too. 

Suddenly the shorter one begins to speak my language “Hello, I will not hurt you. I want to talk.” I sigh realizing they know I’m here then I nervously say “How do I know that? The tall one and you have weapons.”

Both the shorter and taller man look at each other in surprise not expecting me to answer them back that’s when without hesitation the shorter man unholsters his gun and throws it in the river along with the sword that was perfectly hidden under his long cape thing. The tall one removes the gun from his back and throws it in the river the and shorter one continues “I am sorry. Can you come out?”

 Hesitantly I step out from behind the waterfall and I pick up a few rocks and throw them in their direction causing them to step back giving me enough room to grab the sword they threw into the river. “What do you want?”

 I point the sword at both of them causing them to both have their hands raised in mercy then the shorter one says “Alliance.

” I furrow my eyebrows “I’m confused, I’m poor. I have no influence.” He nods understandably “You have strength, I saw you training by the water when we first met 7 days ago” Suddenly it dawns on me this man was the same man watching me train through his spy glass by the shore.

 Unable to form any words out of shock I stay silent and the man continues “My name is Hongjoong, next to me is Seonghwa what about you?” Hesitantly I look around and study their expressions, they seemed genuine but a part of me is too scared to trust them “y/n.” 

I cannot tell them my real name, it’s way too dangerous. Hongjoong blinks a few times then says “You speak the universal language?” I nod “Yeah.” He sighs in relief “I’m sorry but that’s good because I was running out of Eledonian. I’m sorry If I was really bad at it I only know enough to get by.”

 I stay quiet for a few seconds then I muster the courage to say “Where did you dock? I swear your ship was gone when we checked this morning.” 

Hongjoong looks at the waterfall behind me then back at me “Ah, yeah we docked further down where our boat is hidden from other incoming boats.” 

I squint my eyes and press the tip of the sword right where his heart is “You better not be lying, if you try anything I will personally be the one to kill you.”

Hongjoong smirks and gently pushes the sword away from his chest “No worries, I wasn’t planning on it. Like I said, I want an alliance.” I narrow my eyes “Why are you asking me?” 

He steps away from me and looks over at Seonghwa and nods. Immediately Seonghwa hits my hand causing me to drop the sword and grabs my hand and twists it behind my back but I lean forwards making him weaken his grip on my arm and slightly lose his balance. 

I take that as an opportunity to kick him behind the knees and pick up the sword where I tightly press the blade against his neck while I stand behind him. Hongjoong slowly claps while walking back towards me smirking “I’m asking because I want you to be my protector. I knew it when I first saw you training by the shore. Fluid like water and precise like a bullet.” 

Nobody’s ever referred to me like that. He sure does know how to compliment people, I’ll give him that.

 I press the blade a little harder on Seonghwa’s neck causing him to quietly hiss “I’m sorry but I barely even know you. I cannot just leave my family for a bunch of pirates I don’t even know. There is only one person who I’m going to kill and his name is Miyagawa Masaki. Killing another human isn’t in my book unless they’ve hurt me or my family in any way.”

Hongjoong’s features soften dropping the plotting smirk and extends his hand in my direction “Alright, let’s get to know each other then because what if I tell you there’s hundreds like him? Ruining the lives of the poor and defenseless? Killing innocent people and eliminating hundreds of bloodlines. Would that change your mind?” 

I glance down at Seonghwa who was stiffly leaning away from my sword his head gently resting against my stomach, he gives a scared but genuine nod of reassurance of Hongjoong’s words.

  For a few seconds Hongjoong and I’s gazes mutually connect, something in his gaze tells me maybe I should trust him. I mean I can easily overpower either of them if anything goes wrong.

 I remove the blade from Seonghwa’s neck and push him towards Hongjoong causing him to fall on his hands and knees “Get out of here before I regret not killing you.” 

Seonghwa gets up then gently puts his hand on Hongjoong’s shoulder “I don’t think she’s coming Captain.” Hongjoong turns to Seonghwa and gives him a smirk and proceeds to walk in my direction and chuckles “I’m sorry for that y/n I just really wanted to see you in action up close. I really didn’t mean for that to be a personal attack.”

 I roll my eyes “How am I supposed to trust you if you literally attacked me. If anything you’re making me not want anything to do with you.” He smiles and says “Ah, so you were considering it at some point then?”

 I cross my arms and look at the ground “Perhaps..” Hongjoong pushes a strand of hair behind my ear completely catching me off guard by this gesture “What if I told you that if you come with me you wouldn’t have to worry about anything, I’ll pay for it. I’ll pay for food and supplies for your village, for protection, and I’ll even add money so that your family doesn’t have to worry while you’re away.”

I blankly look down then back at him and almost silently I say “I don’t know.” Seonghwa hesitates for a second but then gently pats my back “You don’t have to decide right now, it’s okay.” 

Hongjoong gently pats my arm “How about I treat you for lunch then we’ll come back to how you feel about me.” I nod “Yeah sure, but I’m keeping your weapons.”

 Without turning my back on them I carefully step back and step back into to the river while keeping my eyes on both men and pick up the shotgun and pistol. “I’ll give these back if I approve.

 Also, just for that little stunt you played before we go you have to help me with the groceries I was carrying.” They both nod and we head back to the market then I point at the groceries on the ground with my sword “Go get my stuff pirate boys.”

 Both men walk over and pick everything up then Seonghwa says “Where to?” I walk in between them and begin walking back to my home. 

After a bit of walking In silence I finally muster enough guts to break the ice "So uh why exactly are you guys here in Eledonia?" Seonghwa answers ”Supplies honestly, we were running out of a few things but of course the Captain saw you training and he wanted to meet you so we kinda gave the supplies duty to the rest of the crew while we looked for you."

 I quietly hum “So how many other crew members are there?” Hongjoong answers almost on queue “There’s eight of us in total who are in charge of overseeing the main duties so the other six are doing the supplies duty. The rest are sailors who help us run the ship.” 

The more welk the more I notice we’re now in my village's territory then In a low voice I say “By the way please don’t act scary, we’re in my village’s territory now.” They both make reassuring hums and as we walk to my house the rest of the villagers stare at us, their gazes burning into my skin. I’m sure they’re probably wondering why I’m even with people like this. 

Out of seemingly nowhere I see a fellow villager walking towards us with a weapon in hand “Get away from them Metztli!” I extend both my arms in front of Hongjoong and Seonghwa causing them to abruptly stop “Acatl there’s no need! They won’t hurt us!”

 He walks over towards me and pulls me aside and swings his weapon at both males “Like hell they are..”

I unsheathe my sword and step in front of him fully stopping the weapon from hitting either of them “You are not going to hurt them. We are not in danger.”

 Acatl clenches the hilt of the weapon “They are not who they say they are, they are not good people. All pirates are just as bad as those stupid silver spooned goons, all they do is lie to get what they want.” 

I turn to Hongjoong and Seonghwa and under my breath I utter  “Stay back.” and lock my gaze into Acatl’s “Stop being ignorant, just because we were hurt by some soulless bastards doesn’t mean it’ll happen again.” 

I push his weapon back slightly just enough for me to be able to swing my sword at him and graze his arm then take another quick swing at his hand causing him to drop his weapon and clutch his bleeding hand on his knees.

 “How could you protect these men?! And betray your own people like this?!” I point my sword at him to stay down “I protect those who deserve to be protected and right now they needed my protection, if they were to ever betray my trust they shall have the same fate as my enemy.”

 He slowly gets up clutching his hand “You are wrong for this, you are wrong for going against our village.” I smirk sheathing my sword and dusting myself off “I didn’t go against my people, I simply made peace where there would have been unnecessary deaths.”

As Acatl was about to say something the chief walks up to us with anger tinged in his voice “What is going on here?”  before I’m able to explain anything I hear my mom yell at me from a distance with the rest of my family following after her and with surprise and utter fear on her features.

 “Who are these men Metztli?! Why are they here?!” before I can explain anything my father and grandfather come up next to my mother to try and calm her down  “What’s going on?” 

“I can explain. These men are not evil, they just came here to buy some supplies for their ship and they happened to see me struggling with the groceries so they’re helping me. Then this idiot Acatl starts attacking us and so I just prevented unnecessary deaths.” 

The chief crosses his arms in front of him still clearly upset “Metztli just because someone does a nice thing for you doesn’t mean they are good.”

 My dad gives Hongjoong and Seonghwa a glare “You know better than to lead strangers to the village. You can never trust these punks, especially men.”

 I nod “I understand but they’re not bad people father. They were just helping me.” My grandfather gives me a stern look “What did I tell you about trust Metztli? Trust only yourself, no one else.”

I turn and I signal both men to set the things down “They’re just now leaving don’t worry.” I begin to gently push them the other way then Hongjoong turns and says “I want her to come with us. I want her to protect me.”

 I look at him in horror and shake my head he looks into my eyes for a few moments, smirks and continues “If she comes with us I will pay for the supplies in your village and I’ll pay a militia to protect and alert us in case anything ever happens. I’ll also throw in some money so the village can be renovated since I see the places being inhabited are severely run down and you know for whatever else you need the money.”

 Hongjoong looks down at my little brothers standing behind my mother and gives them a soft smile “I promise the rest of our crew will not let anything happen to your daughter. I’m just putting this out there, there doesn’t need to be an answer right now since y/n herself isn’t entirely sure either.”

 Hongjoong gives me a small smile and pats my head while Seonghwa  gives me a reassuring nod “Well, we will go now.” Hongjoong adds then my grandfather responds “Come again tomorrow, but lunch is on you guys.” 

Slightly taken aback both men nod and smile. Hongjoong then says “We will return tomorrow, it’s a promise.”

The chief looks over at my grandfather and says “Are you sure about this? Welcoming strangers like this?” My grandfather watches the 2 pirates walk away while everyone else watches him in silence “Their proposition was interesting don’t you think chief? We’ll benefit out of this.”

 The Chief gives no response to my grandfather for a few seconds then looks over at Actatl holding onto his bloodied hand then back at me “I cannot get past just blindly trusting people we’ve never met before, it’s off putting not just for me but for the rest of the village.”

 My grandfather nods then turns and gives me a smile “We have my granddaughter if anything happens. She will protect her village at any cost no matter who it is. After all, It was I who trained her or what? Are you doubting my granddaughter’s prowess?”

 The chief stays silent then I give him a reassuring smile, like an indication that this situation was over everyone begins to head back to their homes including the chief. Acatl is the only one who stays behind and stares at me for a few seconds “If something happens this is your fault.” 

He walks away and I bite the inside of my mouth to hold back from further saying anything that’ll cause him to come back. To be truthful I am scared they may earn my trust then betray me but on the other hand I want to believe that nothing will happen and that they are genuinely good people.

The next day while taking a short break during training I hear the leaves rustling from behind and to my surprise it was Hongjoong and Seonghwa again. I’m pleasantly surprised they showed up, you’d think after what transpired yesterday they’d leave but I guess they aren’t weak hearted. 

“Hongjoong? Seonghwa? What are you guys doing here?” The blonde man extends his hand towards me and helps me up.

“I’m here because I want to thank you for yesterday.” I shake my head “Oh no sir I-” Hongjoong lifts his hand to silence me and says “You protected me and my first mate and I really appreciate that especially considering you had no obligation to do so. You could have easily let him kill the both of us but you didn’t.” 

He’s right, I didn’t need to save him. I could have let him fight his own fights but for some reason it’s like my body acted on its own. Seonghwa gives me a warm smile “For that we would like to ask you if you would like to be our friend. Our connection to Eledonia.” A connection? Me? Out of all the nobles or more important people here in Eledonia they ask me?

"I would be happy to be your friend." Hongjoong gives me a relieved smile “Well, that settles it. We are friends.” Seonghwa stands next to me and rests his elbow on my shoulders.

 "Okay, well maybe now that we're friends we should follow through with your grandfather and have lunch." I hum wiping the sweat off my forehead with a small cloth “Now that you mention it, I am kind of hungry.” 

Seonghwa squeezes my shoulders while behind me “Good, we’ve got some nice things prepared for you.” I squint my eyes “I would like to assume it’s a good thing and not a bad one.” 

Seonghwa and Hongjoong chuckle “It’s a good thing my dear, I had the cook of our crew make us some delicious food. They’ll be in the main square later serving the village so I’m sure your family will be there as well since we let them know this morning.”

 Seonghwa nods “Yes, so practice a few more hours and by then the food should be ready, we just came here and decided to give you some motivation so you’d finish your training strong.” I smile at both males “Seriously, thank you.” they both smile and Hongjoong responds “My pleasure, y/n. Anything to show you we’re worth trusting.”

 Wow, he really is trying his hardest if he’s going to go all out like this. Seonghwa excitedly smiles “We’ll see you later okay? Please come by, we’d really like for you to meet the crew” Wow, they really are so confident i’m going to leave. I look over at them and  nod “of course, I’ll be there no worries” Both men say their goodbyes and leave. I sit down for a few minutes and rest before I resume my training for the day.

After a few hours go by I decide to start walking home and the whole way there I think to myself why I saved these men and why was I being so selfless with them. Why did I feel the need to protect the Captain and his right hand man when I don’t even know them, this was all becoming so confusing to me. Not to mention my extreme trust issues with everyone, so I just can’t explain why I decided to trust them. Why am I so drawn to them?

When I arrive at the main square I see alot of people gathered around the front of my house. As I walk closer I notice Hongjoong talking to my grandfather while Seonghwa and another guy play with my siblings. 

There was an unknown male by the fire cooking and a few others whom I didn’t recognize but I knew were with “The Captain” judging by their clothes so those men must be his crew members. They’re feeding everyone I see, they’re really trying to win over not only my family but the whole village. 

I walk over to my mom and ask “Mom, when did they get here?” while watching my little brothers play she says “They got here a few hours ago. Hongjoong, the blonde one said he wanted it to be a surprise for you when you came back from training. You should go eat now, they brought meat! It’s your favorite.” I nod then I turn and see my grandpa and the chief speaking to Hongjoong, he looked happy. I hadn’t seen my grandpa smile since grandma died.

A sudden grip to my shoulder makes me slightly jump “You should go eat, the food will be gone by the time you’re done staring.” I turn and see Seonghwa holding a plate in his hand slightly out of breath giving me a sweet smile “Ah, hah I will sorry just got distracted.”

 I hope he didn’t think I was checking the captain out. That would be weird. Seonghwa walks over to me and hands me a plate of food and honestly it looked and smelled delicious. Roasted potatoes and meat. Meat is considered a delicacy and we can’t eat it very often because of how expensive it is so seeing it on my plate made my stomach rumble so I begin to eat before I even sit down.

 Seonghwa turns to me and chuckles “You like meat? It’s good right?” I nod while sitting down on the grass in front of the tree by the square since It was a little quieter here “I’m glad you liked it, I’m sure Wooyoung prepared it with his secret combination of spices. It makes things so much more tasty.” 

For a little bit there was a silence from the both of us eating but eventually I decide to get brave and ask “Are you guys really not going to hurt our people? Like you’re not doing this as a gimmick to gain our trust then kill or imprison all of us?” 

Seonghwa, slightly taken aback chokes a bit on his food and begins to cough, once a bit composed he clears his throat “No, of course not. We’re The Piece of Eight. We don’t steal from the people, we steal for them. All of our targets are all either royals, nobles, military chiefs or generals, politicians even but never the regular people who aren’t associated with that stuff. If anything we’re most infamously known for being anti government and helping villages who need it the most.”

So they’re basically like the story of Robin Hood, steal from the rich and help the poor. It’s understandable, the rich can be quite nasty. They’re very ungrateful.

 “Sounds a like a great cause, does that mean you have alot allies?” He slightly purses his lips “Somewhat, but it’s enough for it to help us not get caught.” 

I shove another spoonful of potatoes in my mouth “Also I guess I should explain this but, the reason Hongjoong needs an assassin and a protector is because the royals and government know about us now and they’re out to get the captain and knowing how he is he doesn’t want to appease the rich, much less the government meaning he’s going to keep doing what he’s doing even if he needs to kill people to get what he wants and what he wants is to put those people in their place and show them they’re not special that at the end of the day they’re a sack of skin and blood..”

 I stare aimlessly and un focus my gaze and without thinking I say “I agree with your agenda. Rich people are selfish and are out of touch with reality. They’re heartless and evil, I hate them. I hate them all.” Seonghwa furrows his eyebrows “Did something happen for you to strongly feel that way?”

 I set my plate down and shrug “Well, long story short the Saitor Kingdom invaded Eledonia and they killed hundreds of people and imprisoned alot of them as well. My village and other poor villages were taken as prisoners to work for the Saitors with the only pay was being fed enough to be kept alive. It was almost daily where there was an execution of a prisoner for seemingly stupid offences that had no reason to be that serious some of those were of course some members of my village. It was 9 years of complete and utter hell.”

The dark haired man sighs and says in a low tone of voice “I completely understand why you’d hate people like that. Some of us in the crew, specifically Hongjoong had the same luck as you except he was left with nothing.” 

A knot grows in my throat, as much as I didn’t know the Captain like that I can only imagine losing everyone you know and care about. “Meaning he has nothing left to lose.” I say with a knot in my throat and he nods “Yeah, which is why the crew is as close as it is because he considers us all his family.”

 I focus my gaze again and it happens to fall upon the Captain, seeing him smile while talking to the Chief, and my grandfather somehow broke my heart. As much as I know how annoying it is to be pitied, here I am doing it to a complete stranger who probably doesn’t want any of it. 

 “This is why he helps the people, because he knows his family would have wanted him to do something good with his life even if it’s somewhat subjective to other people.” So Hongjoong is a good guy, to be this young and already be so accomplished takes skill and he clearly has the skill and motivation for it all. Unfortunately at the cost of the people he loved the most.

“Sometimes it’s good to be going against the current, and I respect him for it.” Seonghwa adjusts himself more comfortably and puts his plate aside and exhaling softly.

“We all do too, but as of today I also respect you as well for enduring torture and witnessing such horrible atrocities everyday for 9 years, that must have been traumatizing.” I glance over at the people in my village, seeing how happy they looked.

 “Yeah, I guess seeing someone get shot in the face or get bludgeoned to death isn’t something a kid should be witnessing. Till this day I can still hear them choking on their own blood.” I look down at my hand and stipple my fingers on my palm.

 “I can tell you’re very close to the Captain.” I say changing the subject, it’s not that I don’t want to talk about it it’s more like I can’t talk about it because evreytime I do I can hear the blood squelching, bones breaking, and agonizing screams. They're so vivid. 

Seonghwa seems to catch on what I was doing and replies “We are actually, so close I know him like the back of my hand. Although sometimes it’s hard for him to show he cares so to a normal person it might look like he doesn’t care very much but he does he just does it differently than other people. Because to be honest I don’t think I’ve ever seen him be affectionate towards someone.” 

I giggle “Reminds me of my grandpa, he’s the same way. With my grandpa showing affection is him telling me stories from when he was a soldier or buying me some candy when we go to the market, things like that.”

Seonghwa chuckles and points with his eyes in the direction of Hongjoong speaking to my grandpa “No wonder they get along so well.” It’s so nice to see my grandpa smile, it’s been a while since he did.

 Ever since my grandma died my grandpa hasn’t smiled very much or that of all. In a way it seems like they’re both healing each other by speaking with each other. Suddenly I hear Hongjoong call out for Seonghwa, apologetically he looks over at me and says “I’m so sorry our conversation was cut short, Hongjoong is calling me.”

 I shake my head and motion him to Hongjoong “Go ahead I need time to myself anyway, I need to think whether or not I’m going to go with you guys.” Seonghwa reaches over and pats my shoulder “Alright, just remember do what your heart tells you not what others say.” I chuckle “I’ll keep that noted.” Seonghwa gets up and takes both our empty plates with him leaving me with my thoughts while I also observe the strange men here. No doubt they were all handsome and charismatic including Hongjoong and Seonghwa which is the reason why I’m assuming everyone grew to trust them so quickly. Even so, I’ll keep my eyes on them.

In the distance I see 2 black haired men walking towards me one had cat like eyes with dark hair and a grey streak in his hair, he was scrawny looking but has very wide shoulders while the other one had jet black hair, a strong jawline, and a small mole under his right eye. They both sit in front of me and smile “Hey, I’m Wooyoung and this is San. Hongjoong told us about you, so did you make up your mind? Are you coming with us?”

 Slightly taken a back from how forward  this Wooyoung guy is I shake my head “I don’t know, I’m not sure.” San gives me a dimpled smile “I hope you do, it’d be nice to have a new crew member.” 

Wooyoung looks over at San “Nah, you just want her to join us because she’s a girl.” San shoots a glare at Wooyoung “No, it would be nice if I could just have a reasonable person to talk to sometimes instead of an idiot like you who only says dumb things” Wooyoung teases San.“You have Yeosang and Yunho for that, they’re reasonable”  

I raise an eyebrow and smirk “Who says I’m reasonable though?” San looks at me like I’ve betrayed him while Wooyoung lets out a particularly loud laugh then I giggle “I’m just kidding, I’m y/n by the way.”

 I extend my hand towards San and smile almost without a second thought he reaches over and shakes my hand. His gaze connecting with mine with a small hint of awe he says “You have a nice name, It fits you really well.” Wooyoung then says “Is that really your name?” I laugh and nod “Yeah why? Does it throw you off that I have a universal language name instead of a more traditional name?” Wooyoung nods and says “Honestly yeah, but he’s right you have a nice name”

 If only they knew. So far they’re easy to get along with, I may end up taking this job just so my family stops being in the slums and my village as a whole is respected.

“So, how old are you guys?” I smile and look over at the two males and without hesitation Wooyoung replies “19, so is this guy. What about you?” I raise my eyebrow “You know you shouldn’t ask a girl her age, that's rude...” 

San stammers “I'm sorry we meant no disrespect..” I smirk “But if you must know though.. I'll give you a hint, i’m a few years older than you both” They both blink in shock then Wooyoung says “Wait how much older?” 

I shrug “Not more than 2 years” Wooyoung chuckles  “Ohh well you know I thought you were younger than us when I first approached you, you’re so short.” I scoff “I’m a girl of course I’m going to be short, common sense.” Wooyoung holds back a laugh “No I mean you’re short, short. I thought you were a child.” I roll my eyes “Yeah I am, short so what.” Wooyoung gives me a teasing smile While San says “You know that means you’re older than both our Captain and Seonghwa..” 

I raise an eyebrow “Are you guys calling me old?” They both shake their heads then Wooyoung nervously chuckles “Not at all! Actually, I was going to ask if you wanted some of the dessert I made. That’s the sole reason San and I came over was to ask.” I give them both a smile “Yeah sure, that would be nice. Thanks.” He gives me a smile and nods “Okay I’ll be right back, San stay.”

San lays back onto the soft grass and rests his hand on his stomach and replies " Sure, I'd love to.” Awkwardly I sit there for a few seconds not knowing what to say until San says “Listen, if you happen to join us and anyone in the crew ever says anything hurtful don’t listen to them, They can be bastards sometimes, it’s like they forget how to interact with other people.”

 I look up at the blue sky avoiding eye contact with him, feeling his gaze on me. “Thanks, I’ll keep that noted If I decide to go.” After this brief interaction San and I both look up at the sky in comfortable silence until Wooyoung comes back and hands me a small little bowl with some sort of probably foreign dessert and says “I’ve brought you dessert, I’m not sure how sweet you like things but it’s not overwhelmingly sweet. It’s a type of peach tart, it’s really good. I don’t know if you’ve ever had it before.” 

I examine the “peach tart” and to my knowledge I’ve never seen anything like it. “I actually have never seen anything like this before this looks very foreign to me, although I have seen cake before and we only have it for special occasions it’s very rare if we get to eat sugary things like this because they’re so expensive.” 

I take the silver ware he brought with him and take a bite out of it “Oh wow, this is delicious.” Wooyoung gives me a prideful smirk “That’s only because I made it.” I giggle and take another bite “Well your cooking is amazing, let me guess you cooked the meal today too didn’t you?” He nods with a big smile on his face then San says “Look at you, you’re so full of yourself.” He gives San a smirk “You’re just mad she didn’t compliment you.”

In the distance two more men walk up to where we were sitting except these two looked very tall, extremely tall almost like two twin towers. One had dark hair parted down the middle with the fringe of his hair adorning his soft puppy like features and the other one had black rimmed glasses, his hair was dark blue and had a neatly slicked back side part on his hair. 

Both men were definitely taller than Seonghwa for sure, and he was the person I originally considered tall. Wooyoung notices me staring behind him and he turns “Oh hey Mingi and Yunho, this is y/n. Hongjoong’s possible new protector and crew mate.” 

The dark haired one squints and looks at Wooyoung slightly confused then the one with glasses says “She’s so tiny, she looks like a doll…” Wow, I’ve never heard that one before, I was just called a child a few minutes ago. “You think Hongjoong will have her dressed up all cute and she’ll be like a cute killer doll or something?” 

The dark haired one’s expression looks at Mingi in disgust “Maybe you should stay quiet Mingi, you’ll scare away the Captain’s new protector.” Yunho then looks over at me and gives me a concerned look “He’s weird please don’t listen to him. Anyway, hello y/n I’m Yunho” Mingi then responds “I’m Mingi, hi ” I give them both a smile and shake both their hands “Hello, i’m y/n”

 Mingi gives me a very shy dorky smile then I cross my arms in front of my chest knowing exactly where he was looking “So, you guys are pirates right? So does any of you have specific roles or duties?” Wooyoung then says “Ah yeah we do. I’m the cook.” Yunho gives me a curt smile “I’m the doctor” San raises his hand shyly “I’m the craftsman, I fix and make things.”

Lastly Mingi pushes up his glasses and gives me a dimpled smile “I’m the navigator, I work out which way the ship needs to go and I check if the conditions are right for safe travel” Wooyoung continues “Hongjoong of course is the Captain, Seonghwa is the First Mate and Quartermaster which in short just means that he's Hongjoong's right hand man and if Mingi, Jongho or Yeosang need an extra hand he’s there to help.” 

I look around my front yard and point over at the two male figures playing with my brothers “What about those two? What do they do?” Mingi sits next to me and says “Well..Yeosang is the helmsman, the guy who steers the ship and keeps it going in the direction it needs to go while Jongho is the gunner which is a fancy word for the guy who sets up and orders the canons to be fired and helps Yeosang and I with surveillance.”

 I nod with my lips slightly pursed “Hm, wow that’s some awesome duties you guys have.” Yunho shrugs “It has their ups and downs, sometimes I second guess myself as to what I’m doing on that ship” San then says “What about you? What role do you play in your village?” I run my fingers below on the soft grass next to me “I’m poor, I don’t have a role. I have no influence or power. The most my family has done is my grandpa being an Eledonian soldier, he was the one who’s trained me since I was about 16 or 17 years old making that maybe 5 or 6 years of him training me.” 

Mingi gasps “Wait, wait, you’re older than all of us including Seonghwa?! You look so young, how is that possible?!” Wooyoung looks over at Mingi “We already freaked out about that..” Mingi rips out some grass from next to him and throws it at Wooyoung “Excuse me but I wasn’t here when that happened “ Wooyoung dusts the grass away “You snooze you lose, and geez stop that you’re going to get grass in y/n’s peach tart.” 

Mingi mocks Wooyoung causing him to roll his eyes and gets up “Okay I’m going now, I need to go clean up are you coming or not San?” San motions him to leave and closes his eyes “I’m fine where I’m at” Yunho gets up and follows behind Wooyoung “I’ll help!” Mingi gets up and pats my head “I’ll see you later little doll my companion has just left me.” He catches up with Yunho and Wooyoung. 

As soon as he leaves I let out a soft sigh and rest my head against the trunk of the tree looking in the direction of my family, mom, dad, siblings, and grandpa. What would life be without them? San noticing this he sits up and looks in my direction “Are you okay?” I nod and give him a smile “Ah, yeah I’m just exhausted from training this morning.” He nods and scoots over next to me “Ah, I see.” Ahh fuck I was going to get up after this.

I don’t want him to feel bad for getting up right after he sits next to me. I guess it wouldn’t hurt sitting here. “So.. do you have friends?” I continue staring ahead at my siblings and the whole scene before me and I press my lips into a line for a few seconds then a weak smile paints my features “I did at one point, but my obsession with training and everything kind of drove them away. That and I tend to stay in my own world and nobody wants to deal with those types of people.”

 From the corner of my eyes I can see San give me a look of pity then I continue “But that’s fine because I get more stuff done, having friends is a nuisance. “ He thickly swallows almost like he was going to say something but decided he wasn’t going to say anything and very slightly nods “I see, I’m sorry you feel that way.” 

I turn and give him a bright smile “Enough of me though, how long have you been with the crew?”  San thinks about his answer for a bit and says "Hm, like 2 or 3 years? I'm not sure but I've been here for a while." I slowly nod gently running my fingers through the grass "So since you've been out at sea for a bit you probably already know how it is out there." He hums "Yeah, it's pretty bad. More often than not there's always ships trying to rob us so we're constantly on guard not to mention the government being after us doesn't help at all."

God, that sounds horrible. Living every single day on fight or flight mode? On borrowed time? "Wow, that sounds…exhausting." San chuckles "Hah yeah, it is. The only difference is that having the crew there with you helps a lot. You forget the atrocities of the world for a bit until you have to face them all over again." 

San shifts his gaze from the sky over to me, despite his smaller frame it didn't take away from how handsome he looked which made his stare a bit more intimidating "Don't worry though, like I said you've got me if you're ever in a tight spot." I quietly nod and give him a shy smile “Oh, thanks.” we both sit there in silence again until I feel a sudden tap on my shoulder, when I turn around I see my younger brother standing there “So uh, brother kind of fell and he’s crying.”

 I let out a sigh “Dude, mom’s told you guys to be careful.” He nods “I didn’t do anything, he was being a show off with those pirate guys.” I get up and turn to San “I’m sorry. If you’ll excuse me I need to check on my brother’s dumbassry.” He chuckles and gives me a dimpled smile “Oh sure go ahead.” 

I give San a small curt smile and walk behind my brother leading me the way to my crying brother. When I arrive I see Jongho awkwardly patting my younger brother’s back trying to console him While Yeosang looks on slightly uncomfortable. Once he sees me Jongho looks over at me and says “Oh hey, your brother fell off the swing trying to show us a trick.” I cover my face in frustration and embarrassment then fake a smile looking at my little brother “Didn’t mom tell you to stop that?” He sobs nodding “I’m sorry, I thought it would have been cool for them to see.”

I close my eyes trying not to cringe out of my skin and open them gently patting his head “Look, you could show them those cool tricks you do playing ball. You could seriously get hurt doing that, I’m sure they’ll still think it’s cool. Right?” I look over at Jongho and Yeosang giving them the look of “Please say yes” then he looks over at my brother and nods “Yes, of course I’ll still think you’re cool. You don’t have to do something dangerous in order for it to be cool.”

 My little brother wipes his tear ridden eyes “Really?” Jongho nods “Yes, of course. Remember that trick Seonghwa showed you earlier that you got right away? You should show your sister.” My little brother looks over at Yeosang who was holding a ball then he gives my brother a reassuring nod. He gently throws the ball over at my brother and he kicks the ball making it over the branch of a tree behind them. Immediately both men cheer for my brother and I look over at him with a very impressed look on my face. “Wow, your aim is really good now..” My little brother nods and puts his hands on his waist looking very proud “Thank you..”  

After consoling my brother, I walk around to look for that San guy I was talking to but I couldn’t see him anywhere. I walk around the town square to see if maybe he’d wandered off there but nothing, it wasn’t until I was walking home I hear a faint low voice then some giggling shortly after. 

I noticed the voices were coming from the side of a fountain so I didn’t think much of it and continue walking until I hear “Sannie, stop that tickles!” causing me to halt in my tracks and feel a pit in my stomach. Unfortunately curiosity got the best of me and I walk over and peek behind one of the pillars of the fountain only to see San pinning a girl against it having a very intense makeout session that if anyone saw something similar would definitely guess they’re on the brink of coitus. Yeah no. That should have stayed a curiosity. 

I start walking away and let out a soft sigh with the pit in my stomach still feeling funny. Who would have thought that guy with such a sweet smile was a player? Actually you know what? I’m not surprised. Pirates are known to have many children scattered everywhere so I should have expected this in all honesty. 

The rest of the guys are probably the same including Hongjoong and Seonghwa, I mean they are men after all. Very good looking ones at that but for all I know some of them are probably married. Wait, wait, why am I even upset about this? Why am I even thinking about this? I don't even know the guy, this is ridiculous. He could bang all the girls he wants for all I care, I guess looks are deceiving.

Three days pass by since the pirates came by our village and every single one of those days Hongjoong and Seonghwa would stop by during my breaks in training to hang out which was kind of weird to me since I wasn’t used to all of this since my friends would never even want to talk about my training much less come visit me while I was actually practicing especially when I would practice with my gun, they’d always complain over how loud it was. 

Today was different though they didn’t even show up during my second break today which was unfortunate but they’re probably busy considering Hongjoong is the captain of a massive ship and Seonghwa is his right hand man so something must have come up. So when the sun was close to set now and I begin walking home I hear leaves rustling and to my surprise it’s the Captain himself only this time it was just him. “Hey Captain, it’s nice seeing you. Where’s Seonghwa?” He slowly walks over to me and I notice he has something in his hand, not a weapon of any sort it was an hourglass.

It was an hourglass with a beautiful golden frame and the sand being as pure white as the shore’s it was beautiful but I wonder why he has it with him. “Well, I came to talk to you.” Talk to me? With that expression honestly I’m wondering what exactly he’ll be talking to me about since he’s so serious. It’s probably not a good thing which is making me really nervous and hesitant to even ask. “Sure what is it? Is there something wrong?” 

He extends his hand and gives me the hourglass “When the sand runs out, we will be gone. You have until then to decide if you want to come with us if you want to get back at the Saitor Empire for what they did to Eledonia.” My stomach drops and suddenly I feel cold. This is exactly what I was dreading, having to choose between staying here and leaving. I look down at the trickling sand then back up at him and let out a sigh “We’ll be waiting here by the shore, where I first saw you.” I nod then he walks away disappearing into the forest and the first thing I instinctively do is my eyes well up with tears, this is it. I have to make my choice, choose my destiny.

 Am I going to be training forever and never get that bastard back or am I going to put my training to good use and finally make an example of that man? I walk home with tears in my eyes knowing the answer and what I must do, mostly so that my family and my village can live a good life at the expense of me risking mine.

 I go straight to my corner of the room and begin to pack my things that’s when my grandfather comes into the room and looks at the hourglass then shifts his gaze over at me packing my things while crying in silence then he decides to speak “I know you’ll do well my little Metztli, you’ll bring us justice. You’ll bring your grandmother justice and all the other people that we lost during those years thanks to those greedy men.”  

That’s when I finally break down and begin to cry my eyes out and hug my grandfather tightly “I’m scared grandpa, I’m scared I’ll let everyone down and I’m scared of not ever being able to see you guys again.”

He hugs me tight for a few seconds then pulls away with his arms on my shoulders “Sweetheart, you’ll see us one day this is not a goodbye but a see you later. In case my body ever decides it can no longer stay alive, just remember I’ll watch over you. I’ll never leave your side, ever. Your family will be here, your fellow clansmen will be here waiting for your victorious return.” 

He lifts my chin up to meet his eyes and says “Be the lethal soldier I’ve trained and make those people remember Eledonia, because staying here means you quit.” Teary eyed and more calm I nod then he smiles and gently pats my cheek and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear “That’s my little girl, the strong little Metztli.” I keep hearing that word “strong” but I honestly don’t feel like it. I feel weak. How could people see someone so strong when I see the weakest person on Earth for being so distraught over this. 

After talking to my family about my final decision my family along with the Chief decide they will send me off. When we arrive at the shore I see the massive ship whose flag proudly displayed was that of a skull inside of an hourglass. This was it.

Hongjoong stands at the top of the ramp and gives me a welcoming smile. I turn to my mom and give her a tight hug, one that lasts for quite a bit until my mom pulls away gently cupping my cheek “If you ever want to come back home we’ll be here sweetheart. Please take care of yourself, and remember we love you.” My mom's eyes well up with tears and I hug her again gently kissing her cheek.

 I look over at my dad who was intently staring at the ship and doesn’t move one bit until I finally say “Hey dad, I’m going now. Take care of mom, grandpa and my brothers.” My dad clears his throat and nods “Yeah, of course Metztli I’ll do that. You go ahead and have fun..” Although my father and I’s relationship has been strained for years I feel like I need to grow some balls and hug him because I never know when I’ll be able to see him again so I reach over and give my dad a tight hug. From the corner of my eyes and judging from the body language he awkwardly hugs me back. When I pull back my dad gives me a reassuring nod whilst still feeling awkward from the hug. I could tell he didn’t hate it though, he just struggles to show he cares.

 Up next I look at my grandpa who was looking at me with a fond smile then gives me a tight hug gently kissing my cheek. Once my grandpa pulls away from the hug he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a beautiful sea blue ring, puts it on the palm of my hand and closes it tightly. “It was your grandmother’s, it’ll protect you. She’ll be with you.” 

I smile and kiss my grandpa’s cheek and put the ring on my ring finger. Grandpa then pulls out a bundle that was strapped behind his back “Do me a favor and return these to the Captain and his friend. I’ve refurbished them and cleaned them up.” Their weapons, the ones they threw into the river. How did my grandpa know about it? Hongjoong must have told him when they were talking a few days ago. “Of course grandpa. I’ll let them know.” When I look over at the Chief he gives me a nod of approval and a smile.

From there, I begin to walk up the ramp to the ship until I feel a tug at my shirt. When I turn around I see it was both of my brothers “You forgot about us..” I bite the inside of my cheek and shake my head “Of course not, I just didn’t want you two to see your big sister cry is all..” I pull them both in for a hug gently patting their heads with one hand each. When I pull back the youngest of my brothers says “Grandpa told me and brother why you're leaving, don’t die please. Come back so you can see my tricks again when i’m better.” 

I give my youngest brother a smile and nod “Of course kiddo, I promise I won’t die…” My brothers give me one last hug again and run back down the ramp and into my mother’s arms. The closer I get to the top the harder it gets to take a step. Once on top the ramp is collapsed back into the ship and the ship begins to set sail. I walk over to the railing and wave goodbye to my family until they decide to go back home. That’s when Hongjoong puts a hand on my shoulder and says “I know it was a hard decision but I promise you’ll see them again.”

 I silently nod and he continues “Do you want Wooyoung to prepare you something? Are you hungry? Perhaps tea?” I shake my head and stare the now empty shore of Eledonia “I’ll stay here.” He gently squeezes my shoulder “I’ll get Seonghwa to come show you to your room a little later when you’re done okay?” In a barely audible voice I reply with “Yes Captain.” And there I sat in silence watching Eledonia until I could no longer keep my eyes open.

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