#don’t say midnight mass

[seriously-poppins]

I think I’ve gotten to the conclusion that, at least for me, Flanagan peaked with hill house and bly manor

[knowlesian]

i will die obsessed with how annie’s “you aren’t a good person” speech to bev in midnight mass is both the most personally devastating and thematically appropriate thing she could say there

she doesn’t say bev, you are a bad person; she says bev, you aren’t a good person.

she doesn’t say you’re a villain; she says you aren’t a hero and you certainly aren’t a victim.

and worst of all, she doesn’t say god doesn’t love bev: she says god loves bev exactly as much as he loves everybody else.

for bev, who has defined herself as good and victimized and above all else special that’s the cleanest way to cut right into her core without giving her any easy excuses to ignore the things annie is confronting her about

and for a show that is dealing with how we are not inherently good or bad but rather an assemblage of choices that all lead up to the last choices we will ever make and how those choices define us, it points out bev was never doomed by god or the narrative

she made selfish, cruel choices over and over her entire life and never once actually valued the god she said she believed in or a community founded around that belief, so she dies having been confronted in the most effective way possible, alone and without even her much-bragged about faith in god to comfort her despite that all being on offer via (oh hey look) annie goddamned flynn, who absolutely would not have turned bev away in those last moments before the sun rose

midnight mass really is just so, so good

[mister-girl]

Well I guess it’s back to the crock pot

[lovejenkins]

Fucking tired as shit so I’m probably not going to word this properly but whatever.

Ducking love living at an apartment complex with paper thin walls where we have like twenty kids who play outside literally the entire day (no idea what their bedtime is)

I literally would not care if they did not scream (yes, literally, SCREAM) the entire time

And the parents make them play outside. One time I heard one of them yelling repeatedly at one boy who wanted to be inside for one fucking day.

The parents barely watch them though. I remember having the grace of opening my curtain and seeing one of the little boys trying to pee on a couple girls. Like; actual pants down spraying pee on the walkway. And he’s old enough to know better.

Also wouldn’t be so extra upset about this constant daily assault if there wasn’t a CHILDREN’S PLAYGROUND maybe a mile away. Which, you know, is MEANT for children to play at. But no, they have to all play in the grass between the apartment buildings so that I have to listen to screaming and crying children every day all day of my fucking life.

[moonstruckme]

Happy birthday and congratulations on 7k!! You deserve it. Thank you for sharing your gift for writing with us <3

Can I request apple pie- James potter + an airport terminal at midnight

I once saw a guy at the airport who looked a bit like James but I was looking busted and severely hungover from my last night of spring break to talk to him 😅

Thank you for requesting lovely!!

James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 688 words

“Excuse me.” 

The voice is soft but still you wake with something like a growl brewing in your chest, fingers tightening possessively around the strap of your backpack. There’s a boy with brown eyes and a strong chin looking at you concernedly from behind a pair of glasses. 

“Sorry,” he says, setting a hand on your suitcase. You’ve got your leg hooked through the handle, but he doesn’t look like he’s trying to steal it, only resting his hand there. “Would you like this?” He holds up a clumped-up mass of fabric. 

You blink at him, trying to puzzle out whether he’s really making no sense or whether you’re just that tired. 

“For your head,” the boy clarifies. “You just, you don’t look very comfortable.” 

You lift your head, feeling the imprint that something poking through your backpack has left in your cheek. “Sorry,” you say blearily. “I don’t understand.” 

“That’s my fault,” he owns immediately. “Sorry, I meant would you like to use my hoodie as a pillow? So you can sleep properly.” 

“Oh.” You still feel odd, and it doesn’t help that this is the sort of thing that might usually only happen in a dream. Since when do attractive strangers walk up to you in airports? “Um, thank you, but you don’t have to.” 

“No, it’s really alright.” With your head lifted, he starts positioning it atop your backpack, fluffing it as though it’s a real pillow. “It’s my spare. I’m warm enough without it, see?” He gestures to the hoodie he’s wearing as if to demonstrate. It’s a deep red color that looks nice against his warm skin. He does look very warm, overall. “Anyways, there.” He steps back, grinning almost bashfully as he takes a seat across from you. “Now hopefully you can sleep better.” 

“Thank you,” you say quietly. 

He nods, still smiling much too brightly for this hour of night (or morning, you suppose. Is it morning yet?). 

You close your eyes, trying to ignore how pleasantly warm your makeshift pillow is, like he’s been carrying it around in his arms all day. It smells nice, too, the scent of a shampoo you vaguely recognize and also pine, maybe picked up from wherever he’s coming from. You open your eyes again. 

“When’s your flight?” 

He looks back at you, pulling his headphones off one ear. 

“When’s your flight?” you ask again. “So I can make sure to give it back in time.” 

“Oh, not for a few hours yet.” He waves you off. His headphones come down around his neck. “We’re suffering delays. When’s yours?” 

“Five-thirty.” You feel weary at the thought of it, though you can’t wait to get out of here. You’ve been dying to leave this airport since you’d arrived, grievously regretting your decision to save money on a hotel for the last night of your trip. 

He makes a sympathetic hissing noise. “That sounds truly awful. Early bird gets the worm, though?” 

“Something like that.” 

He smiles, and maybe it’s the fluorescent lighting but you think that if you weren’t already lying down it would take your knees out from under you. “I’m James.” 

You tell him your name, and he nods like he’s tucking it away. 

“Are you going on holiday?” he asks, crossing one of his legs under him, getting comfortable. 

“Sort of,” you reply. “I’m going to see my mum. But she makes it feel like a holiday.” Something softens around James' eyes, and for reasons unknown it makes your face warm. “Where are you headed?” 

“My best mates are spending the holiday in France. They’ve spared me a pullout couch.” James tilts his head, looking far more content than anyone traveling at this hour ought to be. You wonder if his lips just lie in a permanent uptilt. “So where you’re going to visit your mum, is that where you’re from?” 

You reposition your backpack so you’re propped up a bit more, James’ hoodie still under your cheek but suddenly feeling less keen on sleeping the hours until your flight away. Oddly, you’re no longer dying to leave this airport quite so badly.

[flanaganfilm]

On my periodic flanagan binge so the questions keep coming. Hopefully I don’t make you regret having an open ask box.

I’ve been absolutely entranced by your use of Holly Holy in MM. No joke, I’ve been listening to the song on repeat and keep seeing the shots of people standing in the pews in my head. I learned the chord progressions so I could see how the modulations worked to keep raising the tension, and how the structure of the song supports the structure of the montage.

I know you’re always coming at projects from the perspective of the edit, so I gotta know: how much of the Holly Holy montage was baked into the script? Because it’s absolutely perfect and I feel like it was designed incredibly purposefully

"Holly Holy" was baked into Midnight Mass almost from the start. I started listening to the song on repeat and imagining the montage sometime back in 2015, and even before we had major plot points figured out for the show, or ever had a studio or a writers room, I had the "Holly Holy" sequence. As far as the script goes, I'd say it was very, very specific about how the song had to be used. Enjoy!

[fluentmoviequoter]

Wrong Start

Requested Here!

Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!reader (with a twin)

Summary: You're arrested for a crime you didn't commit. After you point Officers Bradford and Chen in the right direction, Tim decides you got off on the wrong start and wants to make it up to you.

Warnings: fluff, brief angst, discussion of mass murder, estranged family

Word Count: 1.1k+ words

A knock on your door at midnight wakes you long before you hoped to, making you reach for your phone. Los Angeles is dangerous enough with a mass murderer still on the loose. Your neighbor has watched the story closely, and though you’re not overly interested in the reporters’ version of the crime, you know it pays to be vigilant. When you see two police officers standing at your front door, you grip the phone tighter and pull the door open.

“Good evening, officers,” you greet.

The male officer says your name, and you nod. You spare a glance at the woman beside him, and she grimaces nearly imperceptibly. It’s fast, but something in her eyes tells you this night will worsen.

“That’s me,” you tell him. “Is something wrong?”

“You’re under arrest,” he states. “Please step forward and turn to face the door. Slowly.”

Your brows furrow even as you step forward and begin to turn. “For what?”

“Murder,” the woman supplies. “Fourteen counts of felony murder, assault with a deadly weapon, and domestic terrorism.”

“Whoa, what?!” you exclaim, pulling away from the half-secured handcuffs.

“Don’t,” the man warns lowly, gripping your wrist and pulling you toward him. “Trust me, you don’t want to make this any worse than it already is.”

“But I didn’t kill anybody!” you argue. “You have the wrong person!”

“That’s not up to us to decide. You’ll get your day in court, but the warrant says you are the person we need to arrest, so stop resisting.”

You fall silent as the man reads you your Miranda rights, and for a brief moment, you’re struck with an unwelcome sense of attraction. The officer is undoubtedly handsome, but this is not the time to develop a crush. You haven’t killed anyone, and there is absolutely no reason they should be looking for anyone even remotely like you!

At that thought, you stop on the sidewalk less than three feet from the police car. The handsome officer nudges you forward, but you feel like your shoes have been filled with cement.

“You are under arrest; do you understand that?” he asks.

“Why me?” you question.

“What do you mean?” the other officer – whose name tag you now see says Chen – inquires.

“Did you find fingerprints at the scene?” Neither of them answers, so you say, “DNA then.”

“It’s on the warrant, might as well tell her,” Officer Handsome but Grumpy rumbles.

“Yes, we found DNA at the scene of the murder,” she explains. “Yours.”

You exhale slowly. “I… I have a twin. Estranged, but we have the same DNA. How did you even connect it to me?”

“Short answer, trash is public property once it’s on the curb,” Officer Bradford explains.

“Okay, okay,” you mumble. Speaking up, you say, “I’ll go with you. But please look for my twin, I-I know I didn’t do it, so if you found my DNA…”

“Blaming a twin,” Bradford muses. “That’s a new one.”

“Tim,” Officer Chen whispers, cutting her eyes toward yours.

He hesitates, watching your eyes as you fight tears and stare at a crack in the sidewalk. Then he places you in the back of his cruiser and drives you to booking.

“She claims she has an estranged twin who had to have done it,” Tim tells Angela. “I don’t buy it.”

“That kind of devastation is hard to fake,” Lucy argues. “She seemed genuinely distressed that her sibling could have done this.”

“Or she was distressed that you didn’t seem to believe her,” Nyla offers. “I’ll look into her family, see what I can find. If she actually has a twin…”

“Let us know,” Lucy requests.

“Timothy Bradford,” Angela greets as he and Lucy return to the station. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

“Pass,” Tim says.

“You can’t pass.”

“Pass.”

“Uh, Tim?” Lucy interrupts. “Who is that?”

“Looks like your murder suspect,” he tells Angela. “What changed?”

Lucy flinches as the handcuffed woman jerks back before attempting to kick a passing officer as she less-than-politely asks for his handcuff key.

“That,” Angela begins slowly, “is the twin.”

“I told you.”

Tim turns quickly, and his shoulders drop when he sees you standing behind him. You send him a small smile and wave with the folder in your hand.

“You did,” he concedes. “Sorry.”

You smile as Angela pulls Lucy away from Tim. “No hard feelings, you were just doing your job.”

Your twin begins yelling your name, and you pull your lower lip between your teeth as you look down. Tim lays his hand on your arm and directs you away from the bullpen. Out of your twin's sight, you laugh wetly and thank him.

“I guess this is better than being wrongly convicted, but it’s…” you begin before shrugging.

“It doesn’t make this part any easier,” Tim adds. “Finding out someone you love is responsible for something like this isn't easy. I’m sorry you had to get pulled into it.”

“You’re much nicer when you feel guilty,” you muse with a smile.

“You’re just as annoying,” he counters with a matching smile that lets you know he’s joking. Mostly.

“And to think, I was going to tell the jury that you were nice to me!”

“You don’t have to testify,” Tim reminds you. “You were estranged, you didn’t know.”

“No, but I’ve seen enough to believe it. It sucks, but it’s the least I can do. Family or not, justice needs to be served. Dozens of families have been changed forever because of one decision.”

“Well…” Tim looks around before he decides, “Never mind.”

“Well, what?” you press. “You already arrested me for fourteen murders, this isn’t the time to get nervous to talk to me.”

Tim’s eyes widen in surprise, and he says, “You don’t have to say yes.”

“I don’t know what I’m answering, though.”

“Will you go out with me?” he asks quickly.

You hesitate to answer, and Tim immediately begins backpedaling. You place your hand on his arm and shut him up immediately.

“I wasn’t going to say no, I just wasn’t expecting you to ask that. I thought I’d have to do it, and then get rejected,” you explain. “Are you serious?”

“As serious as I was when I arrested you.”

“That is not funny!” you exclaim with a laugh.

“Look, we got off to a really bad start-“

“The worst.”

“Sure, the worst start, but… you’re kind of great.”

“Kind of? I am amazing, and yes, I would love to go out with you.”

Tim nods, smiling as he offers his phone to give him your number.

“Promise not to arrest me again?” you request.

“Or?”

“I’m not going to threaten you, a few hours in a smelly cell was more than enough.”

“I’ll try to make it up to you.”

You smile and take several backward steps, then call, “First I’m arrested, then I’m annoying, and you’re expecting to make that up with one singular date night?”

“It’s a start.”

[janeyseymour]

Christmas Traditions

it's sad girl hours and this was not edited in the slightest but i hope it doesnt suck okay i will go back into my depression pile of blankets bye

Summary: Christmas and the holiday season comes with many traditions. Melissa indulges you, but she springs a few surprises out along the way.

WC: ~4.6k

Christmas and the holiday season has always been one of your favorite times of year. From the time you were a kid all the way up until now, you’ve leaned into every single Christmas tradition that you can find and figure out. It doesn’t matter that some traditions may be a bit different here in America as opposed to the ones that you have back in Ireland- they bring you joy all the same.

This is your fourth year celebrating Christmas in Philly, but it’s your first Christmas living with your girlfriend Melissa. It’s also your first Christmas without your parents flying across the Atlantic to come and be with you. You’re elated to celebrate with the redhead, but you can’t help but be brought down in spirits at the quiet reminders that your parents won’t be joining you. So instead of letting yourself drown in your sorrows, you fully throw yourself into Christmas festivities.

“My love,” Melissa chuckles as she watches the amount of decorations that you’re putting in the cart at Target on Black Friday. “Do we really need all of this stuff?”

“Of course we do!” you reply with a kiss to her cheek. “I still can’t believe that you don’t decorate unless I’m around!”

Your girlfriend goes to say how it just isn’t worth all of the effort, but who is she to ruin your good spirits? Instead of scoffing, she just chuckles and pats your shoulder. “I was just waiting for the girl who would make it all worth it.”

You beam at her words of affection.

By the time you’re finished stocking up on decorations for the house, you’re pushing a cart, and so is Melissa. You hand your card over sheepishly without even looking at the final amount that you owe- you don’t really want to know how much you just spent.

You can only guess that it’s a ridiculous amount of money seeing the way that your girlfriend’s emerald eyes widen as big as saucers, followed by her shaking her head as she pinches the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger.

“Dear God,” the redhead mumbles. “My Christmas bonus better be good this year.”

When the two of you get back to the house and unload the car, Melissa begins to unravel some of the lights. You frantically reach for the bag and begin stuffing the string that she had undone back into the plastic.

“Hun, what?” your girlfriend looks to you.

“It’s tradition that we decorate on the December 8th!” you tell her with a giggle. “I may be in America now, but I do like to keep some of my Irish traditions.”

The redhead, used to having cameras to catch her incredulous looks, turns in search of one, but comes up empty. “What other traditions are there that I haven’t been privy too for the past three years?”

Your eyes twinkle as you explain the many traditions that you followed in your home country, some that she knows you follow, others that she has yet to experience with you. You tell her of the tradition of Midnight mass on Christmas Eve (which usually isn’t actually at Midnight), to which she tells you that’s a tradition for her too. You explain how Ireland loves their Christmas markets filled with merry and bright spirits. Melissa promises she’ll take you to Christmas Village in center city, and if you really want, she’ll venture to take you out to see the various light shows and markets around Philadelphia and the suburbs of Philly. You tell her how your brother used to make you do a Christmas Day Swim with him; you let her know that you will not be participating in that tradition here. You tell her of the boxes of biscuits and how it almost always started a fight in your family because nobody wanted that last cookie to finish off the layer and be able to start the new one. You speak of how your family back in Ireland always puts a ring of Holly on the door as you point to the bag that has the wreath in it. She’s especially excited to partake in your tradition of 12 pubs- and you tell her that you think you might want to do it with the Abbott crew since your family won’t be here to do it with you this year. 

For as much as your eyes were sparkling as you speak of the traditions that you hold back in Ireland, when you reach the one that perhaps means the most to you, a sadness creeps into your eyes.

“And the reason I bought all of those candles…” you trail off quietly. “It’s an old custom, and I- I know my mam has one in each window all year round. It’s to welcome strangers and to remember those who are far from home.” You sniffle quietly. “Mam keeps them there as a reminder that we are always welcome back home.”

Your girlfriend isn’t quite sure how to respond to that, so she settles for just kissing you softly and wiping away the tear that slipped down your cheek.

You laugh just slightly bitterly. “God, this is supposed to be fun. I shouldn’t be sitting here crying.”

“It’s okay to miss your family,” your girlfriend reminds you. “That’s perfectly normal, especially around the holidays.”

“I think I’d rather just throw myself into celebrating and getting into the Christmas spirit here and at Abbott.”

And because you begin to throw yourself into the Christmas spirit to distract yourself from the blues, Melissa finds herself also participating in festivities that she usually wouldn’t do otherwise.

As soon as December hits, you have that silly little elf in your classroom and causing mayhem to entertain your students. When Melissa comes to pick her students up from your art class, her children are instantly asking why you have an elf but she doesn’t- why doesn’t Santa want them to be watched in her class? Your girlfriend sends you a huge glare; she hates that stupid elf tradition, and it will only cause her classroom to be destroyed every day with the mischief that the ‘elf’ will get into. Nevertheless, she promises her students that she knows Santa, and she’ll ask him to send one of his finest workers to her classroom.

You get a text from your lovely girlfriend mere minutes after she’s picked her students up from your class.

I hate you for this, you read.

You chuckle at your phone before typing out, No you don’t. You love me.

Just know that you’re in charge of my elf.

The next morning, her classroom has an elf, and her room has been decorated by ‘Buddy’. Her students are thrilled, and you can’t help but grin brightly when she tells you that her students love the decorations that you put up.

On December 8th, a Sunday, you wake up bright and early. Decorating is something that you have always absolutely adored doing.

“Babe!” you jump on your girlfriend with a grin that morning.

Melissa groans. “Y/N.”

“It’s December 8th! We have to start decorating!”

The redhead only responds by pulling you on top of her. She holds you tightly to her chest and presses a soft kiss to your temple. “Five more minutes.”

“That’s five minutes of time we could spend decorating!” you tell her.

Melissa peels her eyes open and glances at the alarm clock. “Hun, it’s… eight in the morning.”

“And we’re usually up at 6:30 for school,” you tell her matter of factly. “We slept in an hour and a half longer than usual!”

Green eyes roll, but she does allow you to pull her to a sit. “Do you know how lucky you are that I love you?”

“I’m the luckiest girl alive!” you giggle as you kiss her nose. “How about this? I make breakfast and coffee while you wake up, and then we can start decorating?”

When you see the beginning of a head nod, you leap out of bed and practically sprint down to the kitchen.

“Woman has damn near lost her mind,” the second grade teacher grumbles as she pulls herself out of the warm bed and follows you downstairs.

You already have bacon in the pan and the coffee brewing by the time you feel Melissa’s arms wind around your waist. Breakfast is quiet, and then you’re practically bouncing in your seat with excitement to decorate.

“Alright, mi amore,” your girlfriend chuckles. “Let’s get decorating.”

By mid-afternoon, you have just about everything decorated. The banister is wrapped with green, the Christmas tree is up and adorned with lights, tinsel and ornaments with the star sitting atop it’s tip, her flat surfaces are covered in trinkets that make you think of winter and Christmas, the holly is hung on her door. The outside is strung with lights that you know will look stunning at night. Melissa can only chuckle along and indulge in your love of the holidays.

The last thing that you have to do is put up the candles in the windows- something that you don’t necessarily want to do because you know it will bring down your spirits, but it must be done. So with a glint of sadness in your eyes, you line each window in the house with a candle. You know that across the ocean, your mother and father have already decorated, and their candles are out too- a quiet promise that home is always waiting for you when you need it.

As you look at the candle sitting in the front window somewhat longingly, your girlfriend knows what she has to do- somehow, she has to get your parents over here for Christmas. Her arms snake around your shoulders, and she pulls you close to her.

“You did a nice job, mi amore,” Melissa tells you earnestly. “It looks great.”

You lean into her affections, a sad smile on your face. “Can we watch a Christmas movie?”

“You don’t want to go to Christmas Village?” 

“Not today,” you sigh softly. “I’m kind of tired from decorating.”

“Then a Christmas movie sounds great,” your girlfriend smiles as she kisses your cheek. “Go get comfortable.”

It only takes about ten minutes for you to change into your favorite pair of flannel pajama bottoms with the Grinch on them and for the redhead to get popcorn before the two of you are settled in on the couch.

It takes about thirty minutes of laying on the couch with your girlfriend’s fingers weaving through your hair gently for you to fall asleep. Your girlfriend glances at the clock. It’s not too late to call your parents and try to orchestrate getting them here to surprise you for Christmas. She video calls them.

“Hello?” your mother answers.

“Hey,” the redhead smiles into the phone. “It’s Melissa. Listen, I was thinking… you should come join us for Christmas this year.”

Your father furrows his brow. “Is Y/N okay? Where is my girl?”

Melissa pans the camera so your parents can see that you’re sound asleep on top of her. “She’s okay, just a bit down that the two of you aren’t here. We decorated today, and she set out the candle, and it kind of upset her.”

Your mother sighs softly. “My poor girl. We just don’t have the money to fly out this year.”

“What if I offered to pay for your flights, and you can stay with us?” Melissa bargains. “We can surprise her, and I think she’ll want the two of you to be here when I give her her Christmas present.”

Both of your parents brighten at that- they know what you’re getting for Christmas from the redhead. “You think we can pull off surprising her?”

“I think so,” the second grade teacher chuckles. “I doubt she would be onto us, as long as we aren’t too obvious.”

And so, by the time you wake up from your slumber, your parents have a flight to Philly and back for the day before Christmas Eve, a hotel room to stay in for that one night, and a flight back to Ireland after the new year- not that you have any inkling of what’s going to take place.

The next weekend, Melissa takes you out to Christmas Village in center city. You spend the day drinking spiked hot cocoa and hanging off of her. It’s sweet, it’s warm, it’s cozy- it always is as long as you’re with that wonderful girlfriend of yours. Your gloved hand is somehow always in hers, or her arm is wrapped around your waist. You find little trinkets that are all too expensive but purchase them anyway in the spirit of Christmas. It helps lift your spirits, but when you get home, you see those candles again. Your heart sinks just slightly, but you have to admit that you’re quite ready to curl up with your girlfriend in yet another pair of fuzzy pajama pants and watch another Christmas movie.

It feels like December simultaneously goes by like it’s nothing and also drags on as you wait for your favorite holiday. But finally, Winter break is upon you, and you find yourself getting ready to go out for 12 pubs night with the Abbott clan.

“Thank you for doing this for me.” You kiss Melissa’s cheek as the two of you put on ugly sweaters and cozy pajama bottoms to go out in.

“I know how much you love your traditions,” your girlfriend rolls her eyes playfully. “Just know that next year, there ain’t no damn way I’m putting on a ridiculous sweater again to go out.”

“That’s not what I was talking about,” you giggle, but you nod. “I meant thank you for letting the crew come here and stay over if needed after tonight.”

“Oh,” your girlfriend sighs out. “That. I’d rather them stay safe if we’re going to get as hammered as we did last year.”

You laugh at the reminder of what happened last year- you had barely made it home in one piece, your parents hanging off of you, more drunk than you think you had ever seen them.

It isn’t long before your work friends are at your house, dropping their things in various rooms that they’ll be staying in. Jacob grins when he’s allowed to go put his things in what used to be his room before you came into the picture.

As Mr. Johnson wanders in, he makes an offhanded comment about all of your apparel.

“Never thought I’d see the day badass Melissa Schemmenti would be in the ugliest sweater I’ve ever seen,” Ava comments. She turns to you. “You got her wrapped around your little finger.”

“Whipped,” Mr. Johnson grins. “As the kids would say.” He then accompanies his words with a whipping motion and sound effect, much to the displeasure of your girlfriend. 

“So,” Janine bounces on her toes in excitement. “What are the rules?”

“Well,” you smile. “Everyone already did a great job with the first rule of wearing a Christmas jumper. But, we will be going to twelve bars tonight. Each bar has it’s own rule, and if you break a rule, you have to finish off your drink in one go. Additionally, every four bars, we have to drink a pint of water so nobody actually gets hurt doing this…” You shudder at the memory (or lack thereof) of a few Christmases ago. “Finally, we can only be at each bar for thirty minutes.”

“Oh hell yeah,” Mr. Johnson fist pumps. “I was made to win this game.”

“I’m just so glad to be immersing myself in other cultures,” the history teacher smiles.

“Try to keep up boy,” Ava rolls her eyes. “You’ll be on the floor by the fourth bar.”

Janine gives Gregory a nervous glance, but he just wraps am arm around her shoulder and squeezes gently, promising that he’ll cut her off when needed.

And Barb, who somehow managed to find a Christmas sweater with pirates on it, declares that Sea Barbara is coming out tonight. 

At the first bar, you aren’t allowed to use your dominant hand for anything. Jacob forgets quickly and has to down his beer. At the second bar, there is a no swearing rule. Ava’s first word is “fuck” when she sees her ex-boyfriend. She chooses to shotgun her seltzer. At the bar where you aren’t allowed to use nicknames, Melissa calls you “babe” and she calls Barbara “Barb”. With a roll of those striking green eyes, she finishes off her drink. At the bar where nobody is allowed to use their native language, you’re forced to finish off your beer when you give up on trying to perfect your American accent. Once you’ve ordered your waters, Janine declares that she thinks she’s finished drinking for the night- to which Gregory agrees. Jacob informs the group that he believes he maybe has one or two more bars in him, and then he may have to tap out.

Once all of the pints of water are finished, your group races off to the next destination- the one where if you get there last you’ll be forced to sing a Christmas song off the rest of the group’s choosing. Poor Mr. Johnson has to give a terrible performance of “Dominic the Donkey”, complete with the animal noises. Jacob taps out after beer comes out of his nose from laughing so hard. That leaves you, your girlfriend, Barbara, Gregory, Ava, and Mr. Johnson to continue on with this challenge. At the arm pub, Sea Barbara finally comes out, and your girlfriend has to convince her to keep her shoes on because of the near freezing temperatures. Melissa holds your beer, she holds Barb’s, Barb holds Gregory’s, he holds Ava’s (much to her surprise and happiness), and the principal gets tasked with holding Mr. Johnson’s. At the no toilet pub, you all unfortunately lose that challenge, and you’re out of that bar in less than the allotted thirty minutes. Gregory taps out after that one. The eighth bar, you’re all forced to compliment a stranger. You almost lose the fiery principal at this bar because when you look away for one second, her lips are locked with a man’s. Waters are downed quickly. And then you’re onto the final four bars.

You’re drunk, Melissa is getting to the point in her drunkenness where she just wants to hang off of you. Sea Barbara has taken to speaking in an accent- if only you had gone to the accent bar once she had already hit this point. Ava and Mr. Johnson both seem to be doing quite alright though. You’re beginning to wonder if they have been drinking for the last few bars.

At bar nine, you have to take a shot. That’s an easy in and out kind of bar. At the no phone bar, Ava immediately breaks the unspoken rule of no documenting this outing as she goes live on Instagram to show the charades that the five of you are all partaking in. You choose a terrible shot- one that if Ava or Mr. Johnson don’t take, you’ll know. It’s quite clear that they are indeed drinking when you see their faces, and Ava’s voice rings through loudly.

“What the fuck is this shit?” the principal screeches. “Why would you get this for us?”

Melissa just chuckles. “It wasn’t that bad.”

“What the hell you mean that wasn’t-”

Barbara taps out after that one when she begins gagging after the shot goes down. “That was awful.”

And so, at the eleventh and twelfth bar, it’s down to you, Melissa, Ava, and Mr. Johnson.

“Can I have a pint of Heineken please, Guinness?” the four of you ask. And as luck would have it, you’re all served Guinness. Yours is downed easily, having a taste for the Irish drink. Melissa makes a face once hers is gone. Ava once again takes a video of herself drinking the beverage. Mr. Johnson shrugs, and the liquid goes down in one swallow- how he’s able to do that, you don’t think you want to know.

“And on that note,” Melissa wipes the beer that dribbled down her chin with the hem of her sleeve. “I think I’m done.”

“No!” you protest. “You almost completed the challenge! We just have to get to the last bar!”

Your girlfriend stumbles down the road with you to the last bar.

“Everyone has to get a drink at the last bar,” you tell them with a drunken smile. “I’ll even allow you all to choose your own drink so there’s no gagging.”

By some Grace of God, nobody ends up hugging the porcelain that night. The next morning, however, nobody is thrilled to be awake. The eight of you all claim that you’re never drinking again.

“Until New Years!” Ava chimes in as she rubs at her temples.

It takes until about noon for your last guest to head out, and then it’s just you and your girlfriend laying on the couch attempting to revive yourselves from these killer hangovers.

“It was fun though,” you sigh softly.

Melissa groans. “I’m gettin’ to be too old for this shit.”

Christmas Eve finally comes and presents itself, and you find yourself in the midst of a chaotic as ever Schemmenti Christmas dinner. Seeing your girlfriend with your family reminds you of what you’re missing out on this year, and you have to excuse yourself for a few minutes to shed a few tears. Of course, your absence doesn’t go unnoticed by the redhead of the family.

“Mi amore?” you hear your girlfriend before you see her.

You quickly wipe at the tears threatening too escape your eyes. “I’m fine. Just missing my mam and dad right now a little more than I expected to.” Your eyes wander to the candle that’s sitting in the window above your bed.

“You’re allowed to miss them,” Melissa tells you softly as she sits on the bed next to you.

“I know,” you mumble as you lean into her. “I just didn’t think it would hit me this hard. I miss Ireland.”

“Just a few more months, and we’ll be in Dublin for Spring break with your parents,” your girlfriend offers quietly as she kisses your temple. She doesn’t reveal that you’ll be reunited with your parents tonight at Mass once your guests leave.

You hum, wipe your tears, take a steadying breath, and stand. “Alright. I’m good. Let’s get back down there.”

It’s a bit later that you’re cleaning up after the Schemmentis leave for the night. Mass starts at ten, so you have a bit of time to clean up and freshen yourself up before you have to head to your parish. 

The two of you exit the car and walk to the church hand in hand. You’re seated in your pew and chatting quietly with each other when you feel someone tap your shoulder.

“Excuse me, is this seat taken?” a voice asks- a voice that you know so well but aren’t expecting to hear.

In an instant, you’re whipping around to look at the person beside you, and there are your parents in the flesh. Your arms are wrapped around them tightly and happy tears flow as you truly grapple with the fact that they’re here in Philly with you for Christmas.

This year is the first and probably only year that you end up missing Christmas Eve mass.

“How- how are you here?” you ask as you practically skip down the street back to your car. “I thought you couldn’t make it work!”

“That girlfriend of yours really loves you,” your father chuckles. “Got us tickets to and from Dublin.”

You practically jump on your girlfriend, kissing her fiercely. “I can’t believe you did this for me!”

Melissa just shrugs with a laugh as she kisses you back gently. “I know what my girl wants.”

It’s a nice and warm Christmas Eve, the four of you drinking beers and catching up on life before you feel your eyes beginning to grow tired. As much as you want to keep your eyes open, you find them drifting as you continue to try to keep up with the conversation.

“Just like you’ve always been,” your mother tells you with soft eyes. “I think it’s time you head up to bed, love.”

With a quiet sigh, you heave yourself up from the couch and make your way into the kitchen. You grab a plate and set a few cookies out on it before reaching for the Heineken that you had bought a bit earlier in the day. You set it on the coffee table with a smile before making your way over to your mother and hugging her tightly.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” you whisper as you kiss her cheek. “Thank you for coming.”

You reach for your father. “In case Santa wants a treat,” you tell him cheekily as you press a kiss to his cheek. “I love you guys. Goodnight.”

You’re asleep almost as soon as your head hits the pillow.

Come Christmas morning, you’re up bright and early with a smile on your face. You practically dance your way down the steps, and you squeal with childlike delight at the half eaten stack of cookies and finished off beer. Melissa can only chuckle at your antics.

The two of you exchange presents quietly as you wait for your parents to wake up. It’s wonderful.

When your mom and dad (finally) make their way down the steps, breakfast is served. Melissa really outdoes herself today. The meal is light and warm, and filled with cheerful conversation. And then the four of you make your way back into the living room, and you settle in your seat by the Christmas tree.

“So, I actually have one more present for you,” your girlfriend tells you.

You raise a brow. “Mel, I thought we said only two gifts each.”

“Well, I think this one is the exception,” she tells you softly.

You don’t notice that your mother had strategically set up her phone to record what is about to take place.

“Okay?” you lean forward with excitement. The redhead hands you the small box wrapped in beautiful gold paper and lined with red ribbon. 

By design, it takes you a few second to get the wrapping paper off of of the box and open it. In that time, your girlfriend subtly slips herself off of the couch, pulls the ring box out of her sweatshirt pocket, and is on one knee.

There’s an ornament in the box, and it has the inscription, “Our first Christmas engaged”.

“What?” you whisper to yourself as you thumb over the beautiful script. “Melissa.” And when you turn to face her on the couch, you don’t see her green eyes like you expect to. You lower your eyesight, and there is the second grade teacher down on her knee.

“Marry me?” she asks simply.

You just stare at her, eyes wide, with your hands clapped over your mouth. You can’t believe that she’s asking you to marry her.

“Say something!” your dad implores you to answer.

“Yes!” You tackle her on the floor in a hug, and your now fiancee can only laugh as she attempts to slip the ring on your finger.

It’s only a few hours later that your parents are asleep on the couch, and you’re laying on top of Melissa by the Christmas tree, admiring the rock that now sits on your finger perfectly.

“Good Christmas?” she asks you softly.

You nod and lean up to kiss her. “The best.”

TAGS:  (and let me know if you want to be included!): @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @sweetcheeksschemmenti @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @a-queen-and-her-throne @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld @cosmichymns @sasheemo @m1lflov3rrr @ricejucie @temilyrights @emilynissangtr @squinnchy @dopenightmaretyphoon @emeraldoceansstuff @shinyfaerielights  @blkmxrvel @marvelwomenrule @sarahjohannson @casualfoxwitch @babytakeittothehead @schemmentits

[luvleyshif4]

request for angsty rafe oneshot or ficlet where it’s an established relationship from s1. rafe promised reader he’d get clean and she finds him using and she’s pissed cause he lied to her. she threatens to break up with him and he’s desperate to get her back. reader goes to barry to basically pay to not sell to rafe

ON MY KNEES

Rafe Cameron x Reader

Content: Drug abu$e, angst, lying, breakdown, begging, bribing, mention of rehab/therapy, emotional manipulation, mention of SH

Word count: 1.07k words

Authors Note: HEYY!! sooo it took me a while to post this cause I wanted to mass post a few other requests too so SORRY FOR THAT but I shed a tear while writing the last scene… you’re so creative I love it💗💗

The door creaked open, and your breath hitched the moment you saw him.

Rafe was hunched over the counter, his shaking hands fumbling with the small bag in front of him. The sharp, chemical scent of something bitter lingered in the air, but what hit you harder was the sight of him. He wasn’t just using—he was unraveling. His movements were frantic and jittery, his shoulders trembling with tension.

“Rafe,” you said, voice sharp enough to cut through the haze he was lost in.

His body went rigid, the bag slipping from his fingers as he whipped around to face you. His eyes—glassy and rimmed with red—widened, but you couldn’t tell if it was the drugs or the sudden surge of shame that brought the tears to the surface.

“Baby, I—”

“Don’t.” The word escaped like venom, your voice steady even as your hands trembled.

He flinched as if your word was physical blows. “I wasn’t—I mean, I was, but—”

“Spare me the excuses.” you snapped, stepping closer, even though it took everything in you not to walk right out. “You promised me, Rafe. You swore to me you were done with this.”

He opened his mouth, his lips parting, but no words came. Just silence. He looked utterly paralyzed, like a child caught red-handed but too ashamed to speak.

The sight of him like this—high, broken, and barely holding himself together—made your heart ache. But that ache was overshadowed by the searing pain of betrayal.

“You can’t even defend yourself….” you said quietly, shaking your head. “I can’t keep doing this, Rafe.”

“No,” he finally croaked, his voice weak, pleading. “Don’t say that. Please—”

But you couldn’t bear to hear any more. You turned on your heel, walking out before he could stop you, before your resolve could crack.

And just like that, it was over.

~~~~~~

The next morning, you sat in the sweltering heat of Barry’s makeshift office, the metallic whir of a fan doing little to ease the suffocating air.

Barry leaned back in his chair, the corner of his mouth twitching in amusement as he eyed you. “Didn’t think I’d see you here,” he drawled. “What’s the occasion, princess?”

You ignored his smug tone, sliding a stack of bills across the table. “This is for you to stop selling to Rafe.”

Barry raised a brow, picking up the wad of cash and flipping through it lazily. “You serious?”

“Dead serious,” you said, your voice steady, even though your insides were churning. “I don’t care what it takes. Just keep your shit away from him.

A low whistle escaped him as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on the desk. “Gotta say, I admire the dedication. But you really think cutting me off is gonna fix him? Kid’s got his ways.”

“Then I’ll deal with them too,” you shot back, fire in your eyes. “I’ll deal with every dealer on this goddamn island if I have to.”

Barry smirked, clearly entertained. “Your funeral, sweetheart. But hey, a deal’s a deal. Rafe’s off my list.”

You stood, leaving without another word. The weight in your chest didn’t lift—it only grew heavier.

You loved Rafe too much to let him kill himself, even if it meant breaking yourself in the process.

~~~~

It was past midnight when you heard the knock.

You weren’t expecting anyone, and for a moment, you hesitated. But curiosity won out, and you swung the door open without checking.

Your breath caught when you saw him.

Rafe stood on your doorstep, disheveled and trembling. His skin was pale, his eyes sunken, and he looked like he hadn’t eaten or slept in days. He was a mess—not from drugs, but from something deeper, something raw and human.

“Rafe?” you whispered, barely recognizing him.

The moment his gaze met yours, his face crumpled, and without a word, he dropped to his knees.

“Please…” he choked out, his voice thick with emotion. “Please, just let me explain.”

You stared at him, frozen in place. “What are you doing? Get up.”

“No,” he said, shaking his head vehemently. “I can’t—I can’t lose you...” His hands clutched at the hem of your shirt, his grip desperate. “I’ll do anything. Therapy, rehab, counseling—anything you want. Just don’t walk away from me. Please...”

“Rafe…” Your voice broke as tears filled your eyes, but you didn’t stop him.

“You’re the only good thing in my life,” he said, his voice cracking. “I can’t breathe without you…I can’t live without you... I’ll fix this—I swear to God, I’ll fix this. Just… don’t leave me…”

The raw vulnerability in his voice shattered every wall you’d built around your heart. Slowly, you stepped closer, your fingers trembling as they cupped his face.

“You lied to me…” you said softly, your tone breaking under the weight of your pain. “You promised me, Rafe. How am I supposed to trust you again?”

His tears fell harder, and he shook his head, his words spilling out in a desperate rush. “I’ll prove it to you. I’ll spend the rest of my life proving it to you, I swear. I don’t care what it takes—I’ll get clean. I’ll fix everything...”

You wanted to believe him, you really did. But the wounds of his betrayal were still raw, still bleeding.

“You hurt me..” you whispered, your tears falling onto his cheeks as you leaned down. “And if you do it again, I swear, Rafe…”

“I won’t,” he interrupted, his hands trembling as they rested over yours. “I won’t. I swear on everything—I won’t lose you again.”

You studied him for a long moment, your heart aching at the sight of him so broken, so desperate. Slowly, hesitantly, you leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

He closed his eyes, his entire body trembling beneath your touch.

“I’ll hold you to that..” you murmured, your voice cracking.

When you pulled away, you saw the flicker of hope in his tear-filled eyes. You didn’t say anything else, stepping back into the house and leaving the door ajar.

He hesitated for a moment, looking up at you like you’d just handed him salvation. And for the first time in days, he rose to his feet—not with confidence, but with determination.

He stepped inside, closing the door behind him. This wasn’t the end of your pain, or his. But it was the start of something new.

it was enough to try again.

[zynwarrior]

How I lost 13 kgs/ 28lbs in 1 month!! (73-60kg/160-132lbs)

First of all I’d like to say that this will vary from person to person but it was a lot easier to lose weight at a higher SW.

My daily routine:

I would wake up at 6am and get ready for school and leave at 7am. I’d weigh in every 2-3 days and log it on this app which is the cutest ever for tracking WL.

I’d fast for about 18- 20 hours (starting at midnight). Which would be a lot easier to do at school as I’m not at home so close to my kitchen LOL.

Throughout the day I’d sip on water or black coffee. I highly recommend getting a big water bottle no matter how ridiculous it looks as I found it easier to curb cravings with a whole bunch of water nearby to fill my stomach up.

Chewing gum daily helps to reduce cravings and keep your mouth occupied. It also makes food taste weird once you’re done with it so that prevented me from eating.

As soon as I got home (around 3pm) I’d make myself a cup of coffee and smoke a cigarette (you don’t have to smoke obvi, I’m not promoting in any way) but the coffee would help me stay awake and give me a little energy.

From there id either take a nap or keep myself busy with homework/ projects. If I didn’t have anything to do I’d crochet or practice my Korean or Arabic. Picking up new, easy hobbies helps to keep busy.

I went to the gym at around 6pm where I’d do cardio for 5 days out of the week and rest days on weekends (walking on the treadmill at speed 4.1 at a 5 incline)

At around 8pm I’d have a small meal, usually steamed/ air fried vegetables and some sort of protein. One of my favorite meals was air fried sweet potatoes and an air fried chicken breast where I’d add a bit of salt and pepper.

I’d then shower, organise my school stuff and go to bed at around 10.

To distract myself during times when I was too tired to do work or didn’t want to sleep I’d just be doomscrolling on edblr/ edtwt to mass consume ED media to motivate/ keep me on track to distract myself from binging. After I’d take a nap and I would wake up and not be very hungry and if I was I’d chug a shit-ton of water.

Please note that smoking or vaping does not curb hunger cravings and is a bit of an unnecessary addiction. I smoke just to keep myself occupied for a while and distract myself from food but I 100% don’t recommend starting or using it as I do IF YOU DONT ALREADY DO IT.

That’s all I can think of for now but please feel free to leave requests for any inspo or posts you’d like to see from me!!

[sturniolo-rat]

Pathetic Part 1

Chris Sturniolo X Dom!Reader

A/N: you asked for it and I delivered. I am but a humble civil servant born to peddle smut to the masses.

Contains: p in v sex, female masturbation, overstimulation, toys, bondage, begging

TW: Shouldn’t be any

In which Chris is horny after coming back from tour and he ends up getting vibed like a needy slut.

Chris wants to be touched. He just returned from a tour, and Matt has dropped him off at Y/N’s house. They’ve never been apart that long, and he misses being touched. He’s been hugging fans for a month, but those are friendly touches. Chris needs the type of intimate touches only Y/N can provide.

He knocks on her front door, and she takes a while to open it. She wasn’t expecting him until tomorrow. She thought since he got back at midnight, he would unpack and get some rest. She’s in her hot girl jammies. The special pair of pajamas that every girl has for when they want to feel sexy while they sleep. Not sexy in a lingerie way but sexy in a casual “I didn’t put any thought into this; I'm just naturally this hot” kind of way. Y/N’s are a pair of very short pink pj pants covered in strawberries and a cut-up D.A.R.E t-shirt that falls sensually off her shoulders. 

At the sight of her, his eyes start to well up, and he envelops her in a hug, sneaking his hands under her shirt to touch the skin on her back. His emotional greeting takes aback Y/N. “Fuck, I missed you so much.” He says into her neck with great frustration.

“Oh, my baby, you don’t have to cry. I missed you, too,” she says in a nurturing tone, rubbing his back. Let’s go inside, okay?”

“Mhmm, okay,” he says in a small voice. She leads him by the hand into her house. He is mesmerized by the way her thighs rub together when she walks, the way her hips move, and her ass jiggles. She’s so fucking sexy. When they reach her living room. In that same small voice, he says, “No, not here.” Never letting go of her hand moves, he moves so close to Y/N that their chests touch. “Upstairs,” he whispers. 

“Why? I was just gonna-”

“Please, I need you.” He interrupts, his voice cracking.

 She puts her hands on his face and kisses him softly. “You want me to play with you, kitten?”

“Mhmm, please.”

“Okay, baby, come with me.” She walks him to her room, and he doesn’t know what to expect, but he knows he’s going to be taken care of. Come on, let’s get these clothes off you.” He raises his arms so she can lift his shirt and remove it. Then she helps him out of his sweats and boxers. When he’s all naked, she runs her hands up his sides and over his chest, giving him chills. She has to stand on her tiptoes to whisper in his ear, “You’re so pretty, Kitten.” 

“Thank you, miss.” his cheeks get all rosey, and he gives her a tiny smile. 

 “Welcome, baby. Lie on your back for me. Hands above your head and  head on the pillow so you’re comfy.”  Y/N watches as he gets into position. He’s not being bratty tonight. He must really be desperate, and that’s just how Y/N likes him. She opens the nightstand to retrieve a long red silk ribbon to tie Chris’s hands. The sight of her bringing out the ribbon makes his cock jump.

“Miss,” he whines because she’s taking so long to touch him where he needs it most.

“Hush, kitten.” She stands in front of the bed and slowly starts to take her shirt off, making sure her hands linger on her curves, and her hands stop to squeeze her breasts before pulling it over her head. She bends over to touch her toes before sliding her shorts down her legs. Chris is surprised she’s not wearing any panties. She doesn’t need to tease him like this; he's already so hard and ready for her. 

“I’m gonna touch you now.” She looks at her acrylic nails. They’re short, stiletto-shaped, freshly done, and extremely pointy. She walks to the side of the bed and gently glides her nails from his neck to his chest. It tickles, so he smiles a bit. She drags them over his nipples. They start to pebble, and she stops to flick and suck at them. Some men don’t have many nerve endings in their nipples, but Chris isn’t one of them. His nipples are sensitive, and he loves when Y/N plays with them. Once his nipples are as hard as they can be, she runs her nails down to his navel. The sensation gives Chris goosebumps. She figures tonight is an excellent time to try sensory play. He needs to be touched, and she’s teasing him by touching him in a way he doesn’t expect. When her nails reach his lower half, his hips start to buck in a silent plea for more contact. She pulls her hands away, and he moans out of frustration.

She grabs something else from the nightstand before she sits in front of him on the bed. Her legs are open, feet flat on the bed, with her pussy on full display. “Miss, please,” he begs.

“I’ll get to you soon.” Y/N runs a finger through her folds.“But I have to take care of myself first.” She says breathily and starts to rub slow circles over her clit. She lets out a soft moan. He tugs against his restraints. It’s so hard for Chris to watch Y/N touch herself. It’s unfair that she’s not touching him and even more unjust that he can’t touch himself watching her. “I wanna be able to give you all my attention when I pleasure you.” 

Once she gets her clit is all warmed up and engorged, she takes out the vibrator from behind her back. Chris remembers the very distinct moans that it elicits from her. She turns it to its first setting. Then runs the tip of her toy against her opening to get it nice and wet before she holds it onto her clit. The steady low vibration feels so fucking perfect. Her eyes shut, and she bites her lip to hold in her moans. She wants to cum quickly so she can focus on Chris, so she speeds up the vibrator. “Oh, fuck.” She rubs her toy up and down her clit. Chris can’t help but watch as her legs shake and her hips start to buck. She’s going to cum all over that toy, and he’s never wanted to be an inanimate object this bad in his whole life. 

“Fuck, I wanna see you cum, miss. Please, please cum.” He says, knowing it’s what she needs to hear to get her there. With his words on her mind, she throws her head back and lets out a roaring moan. Her pussy starts to clench, and she cums. 

When she comes down from her high, she hears the feeble cries Chris has been letting out. “Oh, kitten, did you want a turn?” She teases. Y/N moves on the bed to sit at Chris’s side and holds the vibrator up. “I know we haven’t tried this yet, but I thought you’d like it.” She turns it to its second setting. The one that transitions back and forth from slow to fast vibrations. Holding it only centimeters away from the tip of his rock-hard cock she asks, “Do you think you’ll like it?” 

He nods his head eagerly. “Yes, miss, I do. I really, really do.” She lowers the toy onto his cock, but it starts fast, and he winces because he isn’t ready for it. As it slows to a low rumble, his muscles relax, and he is able to bask in the pleasure. He’s never felt anything like this before. Y/N starts to rub the vibrator in circles over his head. He closes his eyes, gets lost in the feeling, and lets out a low string of moans. Just as he’s getting comfortable, the vibrations gradually speed up. “Yes, yes, yes.” His moans get louder, and waves of deep pleasure roll through him, but only for a moment because already it’s slowing down. Y/N makes up for the lost sensation by stroking the base of his cock. He goes through another cycle of high vibrations, but her hands are touching him this time. His abdominal muscles start to constrict, and his hips begin to buck up into her hand. “I’m gonna cum! Can I please cum?”

“Oh, you wanna cum, kitten?”

“Mhmm, yes!” He whines.

She removes the vibrator and stops moving her hand. “Well, I don’t want you to cum, just yet.” 

“Fuck!” He cries and kicks his feet in frustration.

She puts a finger to his mouth. “Shhh.. I don’t want to hear another complaint come out of your pretty little mouth.” 

“I just want you to touch me and make me cum please.” He begs, his breathing uneven and heavy. Before responding, she swings her leg over and straddles him. 

“I am going to make you cum. I promised I would take care of you.” She grabs his face with her hand and gives him a soft kiss. “And I always take care of you, right?”

“Mhmm.” He says, looking at her with those doe eyes. She sits on his lap with her pussy right up against his base. When she looks down, she sees the tip dripping precum onto his stomach. He is in complete and utter agony, waiting for her to line him up and sit on his cock. He rocks his hips to create some friction. He just slips himself between her pussy lips and gently jerks himself off using her folds. Y/N likes watching him get his dick all wet with her cum. She almost abandons her plan and just pushes him inside, but instead, she follows through and grinds her pussy onto him. He’s whimpering now. 

“Please sit on my cock, I’ll be so good.”He’s so close to getting what he wants, but she’s just not giving it to him. Y/N grinds her hole all the way up his cock until he’s convinced she is going to let him in, but she pulls back at the last second. He lets out a little yelp, and she leans down to give him a long, passionate kiss. She moves her hips faster, and she uses her hands to pinch his nipples. He throws his head back and lets out a moan from deep in his chest. “I’m so close!”

“Oh, how close are you, kitten?”

“Please, I’m so fucking close!” She sits up, and all of the contact he so loves is lost. “No, no, no, don’t move, please!”

“I’m sorry, baby, I know, I’m so mean. I just wanna make sure when you cum you truly appreciate it.”

His eyes are closed, and he feels defeated and hopeless. Y/N takes this moment to sink down onto his cock. His eyes shoot open, and he lets out a gasp. “Yes! Thank you, miss,” she places her feet flat on the bed and uses her knees to bounce up and down on his cock. Fuck he fills her up so nice. She leans back, using his legs to keep herself up and bouncing. He doesn’t moan anymore; he whines and yelps and mewls at her every movement. He’s so fucking pathetic he has a year running down his cheek. 

Y/N can’t move any faster on to him, so she says, “Buck up into me, kitten, make yourself feel good.” He does. And he does it really fucking fast. He’s jackhammering into her, and she frees one of her hands to rub her clit. Her pussy is tightening around his cock, and she’s moaning like crazy, even louder than with the vibrator. He’s so afraid to tell her how close he’s coming to an orgasm, but he knows that it’s what good kittens are supposed to do. 

“I wanna cum with you!” 

“Mhmm,” she nods.

“Please, miss, can I cum with you!” He doesn’t realize she already said yes. He’s losing his faculties to his impending orgasm. 

“Yes, baby, you can cum! You can with cum me, and in me, and afterward, we can do whatever the fuck you want because you’ve been such a good fucking kitten for me!”

He doesn’t say anything as he climaxes; he just lets yel, which causes his voice to break. The sound of it pushes Y/N over the edge, and she sits back down on her knees, still keeping Chris inside her. She continues riding him softly, clenching and unclenching herself around him, gently milking his cock. When Chris finally returns to planet Earth, he’s okay with the small movements. Pretty soon, though, it starts to hurt. “Oh shit. That hurts a bit.”

“Hmm? You don’t like it anymore? You were just begging for it a minute ago.” She is highly amused with herself.

“That was different, and you know it.” He cringes.

“But still no safe word from you, huh? Who’s to say I’m not just giving you the thorough fucking you deserve?” She continues riding him as she unties his hands from each other. He’s much stronger than Y/N, so he uses his hands to hold her hips and stop her movements. 

“Thank you, miss, for the thorough fucking, but I think the fun is over.” He says in his “real man that is 2x stronger than you” voice and playfully moves her off him. 

“I was so freaking awesome tonight.” Y/N is so proud of her dom performance. “I pulled out at all the stops.” She counts on her fingers

“We had bondage, toys, edging, and overstim!” 

“Yes, you did great, baby. You took advantage of my very pathetic state, and it was amazing.”

“And I didn’t have to plan it! I crafted it on the spot like a fucking evil mastermind!” 

“Alright, don’t get ahead of yourself. I bet you I could do better on short notice.”

“Fuck you! No way!” She smacks his chest.

“Well, the next time you come to me in a pathetic touch-starved state, we’ll see who doms better.”

“Deal.”

“Deal.”

Masterlist

Taglist

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[nerosukehiro]

Only been with you.

Yami Sukehiro Smut/Fluff (female reader)

Lord help me cause this man is soooo fucking fineeee. I just finished the series and I stg if they don’t finish that show I’m gonna raise hellll. Anyways this one isn’t very detailed but there is some fluff in the mix too. Hope you enjoy :)

_._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._._.

Finally I can relax. It had been at least a week since the battle with the Eye of the Midnight Suns. After the fight came the clean up and checking for dead bodies of those who were murdered by the elves to possessed our comrades. It was a devastating loss though and the kingdom suffered many casualties. However we were able to do most of the clean up in a week. The down side is that the council is wanting to kill Asta and Nero, blaming them for the whole thing just because they don’t understand his anti magic and Neros forbidden magic and believe they are the reason for the mass destruction.

So now it has became a mission to get both of their names cleared and the team decided to set out on adventures to find answers. Answers that can help their case. I was already planning on going on my own to help with the cause. Asta was like my little brother and I can’t, no, won’t let him die for something that wasn’t even his fault.

But now it’s time to relax and the first thing I’m gonna do is get in the hot spring. Thankfully non of the squad mates were at the hide out so I can have peace and quiet for more than 10 minutes.

I got in letting the warm water surround me, my body experiencing major relief. I grabbed my loofa and some soap and started cleaning my body. I started reaching for my back when I heard someone start speaking. “Need some help?” Fuck… It’s Captain Yami.

I slowly turned around and my eyes widened. He was naked. Not like I’ve never seen him naked before in fact I’ve seen it before, many times. “Awe doll are you blushing?”

“Uh no. You just startled me, I don’t need any help and would you mind putting some clothes on.” He started chuckling and walking close to me. His hand reached the back of my neck and pulled me in to kiss him. “Sir, I thought we said we were done with this.”

“No I didn’t say that, you did. You just said it because you saw that the Blue Rose Captain was flirting with me. You don’t have to be jealous though my love. I want you and only you.” I rolled my eyes and started to laugh. He didn’t seem to like that much he wrapped his hand around my neck and squeezed it just a bit. “Mmm you know, jealousy is not a good look on you. Don’t worry. You are the only girl I’ve ever wanted.” He pushed his knee between my legs putting pressure where I need it the most.

Ah fuck it.

“Yami. Please. I need you.” I pleaded and started rubbing my pussy on his thigh. “That’s what I thought. Let me make you feel good and after I gotta give you something that’s in my bedroom.” With that he thrusted two fingers in me without warning.

“So wet for me. You wanna know something? I know for a fact that I was your first and I know that you haven’t had anyone else besides me. Isn’t that right?” He wasn’t wrong, he’s the only man I have ever been with. “Y-yes it is. Only been with you.”

His fingers were set to a brutal pace making me moan loud for anyone to hear. Sorry if you’re hearing this Henry. “Fuckk Yami. Feels so good baby.” He was enjoying this to much, his other hand started rubbing at my clit. “Yeah does my girl need to cum?”

No not yet, I wanna cum on his cock and not his fingers. Not only did I wanna cum on top of him, I wanted him to cum inside of me. “Please. Wanna cum on your cock.” This made his hands go faster. “I want you to cum on my fingers first little girl.”

Adding a third finger and curling them upwards, he was so deep. My moans started becoming louder. I had no control of my body at this point. “Doll, look at me.” My eyes met his and he smiled. I could feel the tightness in my belly my body feels like it’s on fire. I don’t know how much longer I can last.

“Your squeezing around my fingers baby, are you gonna cum?” I could only nod my head. The way he is making me feel is something I’ve missed for the last few weeks. “I’M GONNA CUM, YAMI!!!” My body jerked. “Fuck good girl. Let’s clean you up and take you to my room, how does that sound?” I couldn’t speak so I nodded my head yes.

After he helped clean me up, picked me up bridal style and walked me to his room. Thank god non of the others were here to see us like this. As we got to his room he gently laid me on the bed.

“So, there’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you. For quite some time now actually. I know I might not seem like the romantic type but I want you to know that I am in love with you. The last few years we have known each other we’ve fought together, laughed together, cried together and spilled blood together. I know it’s seems like I never really wanted a relationship but the truth is. You are all I want. All I need. Please Y/N. Be mine forever?”

He pulled a ring out… DID HE JUST FUCKING PROPOSE?! “Uh… Yami are you-“ “Marry me Y/N.” Oh my god he is holy shit. “YES!” I screamed as I jumped on top of him. He grabbed my face and started kissing me. I reached between us and gripped his cock. He was extremely hard. “Hey don’t tease me baby, wanna feel your tight little pussy wrapped around me. Gonna breed this pussy and maybe get you pregnant. You would like that wouldn’t you?”

Fuck it’s gonna be a long night.

[bnhaobservation]

Quirk counseling: canon, the cultural references and what we can guess from this all (now with the bit about Chap. 431)

So, a recent ask I received pushed me to dig more into Quirk counseling, in hope I could offer better information about it.

Also thanks to @poppy5991 who helped me to expand the overmentioned ask adding to it things I forgot to mention. Hopefully this time I've covered things better. If not, I apologize.

2024-12-05 edit: As Horikoshi added a bit about Quirk counseling in Chap. 431 I've expanded this post to include that too. You can find it at the bottom of the post under the title "CHAPTER 431 AND WHAT IT TELLS TO US".

LOOKING AT CANON AND WHAT IT TELLS US

There’s not much about Quirk counseling as it gets mentioned, as far as I know, exactly 6 times in the whole 42 volumes (and the anime).

The first time Quirk counseling comes up, is after Shigaraki’s attack in chap. 22... and not much is said.

MIDNIGHT ‘Shōgaku-ji no “issei ‘kosei’ COUNSELING” uke tenai no kajira...’ ミッドナイト「小学時の『一斉〝個性〟カウンセリング 』受けてないのかじら...」 Midnight “Didn’t he receive “universal/mass/simultaneous ‘Quirk’ counseling” in elementary school?” [Chap. 22- Ep. 14]

From what Midnight says we can infer that ‘Issei “kosei” COUNSELING’ [一斉〝個性〟カウンセリング “universal/simultaneous/mass ‘Quirk’ counseling”] is given in elementary school as kind of a group activity or class lesson as ‘issei’ (一斉) generally is used to say “simultaneous”, “all at once”, which should imply all the kids at elementary school (or more likely, all the kids in a class) get it at the same time.

For contest, Midnight brings this up because they think Tomura has too much power and was never taught to ‘control’ it (as in not to use it to do what he wants). So we can guess Quirk counseling would, in their mind, have given Tomura a better grasp of what was allowed to do with his Quirk and what wasn’t (with becoming a Villain being definitely on the ‘Don’t do it’ list).

The discussion about Quirk counseling won’t progress any further.

The next time Quirk counseling is mentioned is in chap. 165.

Ikoma Komari ‘Hai… shōgakkō teigakunen wa jinkaku keisei ni oite taisetsuna jiki desu...〝Kosei〟 no chigai ga ōkiku eikyō suru tame COUNSELING o okonai. Sukoyakana seishin o hagukumeru yō SUPPORT suru no desu ga... COUNSELING mo bannōde wa arimasen. Kono CLASS no ko-tachi wa watashi-tachi ni kokoro o tozashite shimaimashita. Watashi no sekinindearu koto wa shōchi shite imasu...! Desuga...! Yume ni mukatte hagende rassharu minasama to fureau koto de massuguna kimochi o omoidasa sete age rarereba…’ 生駒小麿里「はい…小学校低学年は人格形成に於いて大切な時期です...〝個性〟の違いが大きく影響する為カウンセリングを行い。健やかな精神を育めるようサポートするのですが...カウンセリングも万能ではありません。このクラスの子たちは私達に心を閉ざしてしまいました。私の責任であることは承知しています...！ですが...！夢に向かって励んでらっしゃる皆さまと触れ合うことでまっすぐな気持ちを思い出させてあげられれば…」 Ikoma Komari “Yes... the early years of elementary school are an important time for personality development... differences in “Quirk” have a big impact, so we provide counseling. We support them in developing a healthy mind... but counseling is not a panacea. The children in this class have closed their hearts off to us. I know that it is my fault...! But...! I hope that by interacting with all of you who are working hard towards your dreams, we can help them remember their honest feelings...” [Chap. 165-Ep. 79]

Here we don’t talk specifically of Quirk counseling, just of counseling and of how ‘differences in Quirk’ have a big impact on personality development, also adding that counseling is not a fix-it-all. Ironically though, all the kids in the class seems to be the same according to their teachers, ‘mondaiji’ (問題児 “problem children”) who’re always ‘hanko-teki’ (反抗的 “rebellious”/“defiant”) no matter what she does despite them all having very different Quirks, children who have ‘closed their heart’ to them (aka they aren’t listening to them anymore) and feel they’re better than anyone else and it’s clear with this class counseling didn’t work at all.

We jump at chap. 226.

CURIOUS ‘Inō no yokuatsu ni yotte jibun o koroshita fukōna shōjo, sore ga anata nandesho? Toga Himiko. ‘“Kosei” COUNSELING’, jita rikai no yugami o kyōseishi shakaisei no suri awase o hodokosu jōsō kyōiku (read: PROGRAM). Mochiron, kanpekina PROGRAM de wa naishi, kojinsa o yori tsuyoku kanjite shimau to iu mondai o kakaete imasu. Chi o nomi henshin suru, umaretsuki motsu sono inō ni yotte anata wa “chi” ni tsuyoi kyōmi o hikareru yō ni natta. Shikashi shin no fukō wa “akogare” to iu dareshimo ga daku futsū no kanjō. Chi to akogare kamiatte shimatta nitsu no yōso wa tōtei shakai ni ukeire rareru MONO de wa nakatta. Dakara, anata wa FUTA o shita. Jishin o yokuatsu shi kamen o tsukutta.’ キュリオス「異能の抑圧によって自分を殺した不幸な少女、それがあなたなんでしょ？渡我被身子（トガヒミコ）。『〝個性〟カウンセリング』、自他理解の歪みを矯正し社会性の擦り合わせを施す情操教育（プログラム）。もちろん、完璧なプログラムでは無いし、個人差をより強く感じてしまうという問題を抱えています。血を飲み変身する、生まれつき持つその異能によってあなたは〝血〟に強い興味を引かれるようになった。しかし真の不幸は〝憧れ〟という誰しもが抱く普通の感情。血と憧れ噛み合ってしまった２つの要素は到底社会に受け入れられるモノではなかった。だから、あなたはフタをした。自信を抑圧し仮面を作った。」 Curious “You’re an unfortunate girl who killed herself by suppressing her supernatural powers, aren’t you? Toga Himiko. ‘“Quirk” counseling’, it’s an emotional education (read: program) to correct distortions in self-understanding and other things, and to adjust for socialization. Of course, it’s not a perfect program, and it has the problem of making individual differences even more apparent. Your innate ability to transform by drinking blood has made you very interested in “blood”. However, your true misfortune is “admiration”, a normal emotion that anyone can have. The two elements that go together, blood and admiration, were never going to be accepted by society. So you put a lid on it. You suppressed your confidence and made a mask.” [Chap. 226]

Episode 109 should be the one in charge to transpose this scene in animation but episode 109 cut the references to Quirk counseling.

CURIOUS ‘Inō no yokuatsu ni yotte jibun o koroshita fukōna shōjo. Sore ga anata nandesho? Toga Himiko. Umaretsuki motsu sono inō ni yotte anata wa chi ni tsuyoi kyōmi o hikareru yō ni natta. Shikashi, shin no fukō wa akogare to iu dareshimo ga daku futsū no kanjō to chi e no kyōmi, kono futatsu ga kamiatte shimatta koto. Sore wa tōtei shakai ni ukeire rareru MONO de wa nakatta. Dakara, anata wa FUTA o shita. Jishin o yokuatsu shi kamen o tsukutta.’キュリオス「異能の抑圧によって自分を殺した不幸な少女。それがあなたなんでしょ？渡我被身子。生まれつき持つその異能によってあなたは血に強い興味を引かれるようになった。しかし、真の不幸は憧れという誰しもが抱く普通の感情と血への興味、この二つが噛み合ってしまったこと。それは到底社会に受け入れられるモノではなかった。だから、あなたはフタをした。自信を抑圧し仮面を作った。」 Curious “You're the unfortunate girl who killed yourself by suppressing your supernatural powers. That's you, isn't it? Toga Himiko. The supernatural power you were born with has made you very interested in blood. However, your true misfortune was that your fascination with blood and your normal emotion of longing were intertwined. This is something that could never be accepted by society. So you put a lid on it. You suppressed your confidence and made a mask.” [Ep 109]

It’s a bad decision as Quirk counseling was meant to become important later but that’s what they decided to do.

Anyway in the manga there’s something we can work with, if before we were told Quirk counseling helps in developing personality, here it’s clarified the help is aimed at helping people to act ‘normal’, so that they can have a correct perception of themselves as well as socialize and interact correctly, the problem is it suppresses whatever is judged ‘not normal’ in a person and Quirks often generate wild differences between what’s normal for a person and what’s normal for another.

The result of this is that Quirk counseling ends up remarking in an even stronger way the differences between people, by forcing them to suppress feelings that are dictated by their Quirk.

We then jump to chap. 370.

? ‘“Kosei” COUNSELING!” Kosei” kyōiku! Kore ga nise (read: mayakashi) de aru koto o! Wareware wa “katachi” o motte shitte iru!.’ ?「〝個性〟カウンセリング！〝個性〟教育！これが贋（まやかし）である事を！我々は〝形〟を持って知っている！」 ? ““Quirk” counseling! “Quirk” education! This is phony/bogus/sham (read: fake/deception)! We know it due to having this “shape/form”!” [Chap. 370-Ep. 152]

At this point we’ve a nameless heteromorph guy claiming Quirk counseling (along with Quirk education) is basically a sham, it’s not it didn’t work with that class of kids by coincidence, it’s just something that doesn’t really work with Heteromorphs.

While there’s not really an explanation we can guess that, if the point of Quirk counseling is making people ‘normal’, Heteromorphs, who in Japanese are called ‘Igyō’ (異形 “abnormal”), have a hard time with it, since they’re not normal by definition and can’t really change/suppress their ‘not normal’/‘heteromorphic’ traits.

We aren’t told what Heteromorphs are told during Quirk counseling, and the thing is made more complex by how somehow in big cities there’s no discrimination, while in rural villages people still go for ‘chiharai’ (血祓い “blood cleansing”), beating and scarring Heteromorphs who dare to come into contact with not-Heteromorphs, no matter if it’s to save them.

We then jump to chap. 392.

? ‘HAI kyōsei shite ikimashou “futsū” ni. A HAI mō chotto matte kudasai. Sugu sotchi ikimasu. Etto… ē daijōbudesu. Sō desu ne… tsuyoi “kosei” o motsu ko niarigachi na tōsaku desu yo. Kono shakai de wa yoku aru koto desu. Tadashite keshite ikimashou.’ ?「ハイ矯正していきましょう〝普通〟に。あハイもうちょっと待ってください。すぐそっち行きます。えっと…ええ大丈夫です。そうですね…強い〝個性〟を持つ子にありがちな倒錯ですよ。この社会ではよくあることです。正して消していきましょう。」 ? “Yes, let’s correct it and make it “normal”. Ah, yes, please wait a moment. I’ll be there right away. Um... yes, it’s okay. Well... it’s a common perversion among children with strong “Quirks”. It’s common in this society. Let’s correct it and eliminate it.” [Chap. 392]

Here we see a person talking with Himiko’s parents. We aren’t told this person is a Quirk counselor but, I guess, that’s the idea. It’s hard to say if she’s Himiko’s teacher or an external figure, however it makes clear Quirk counseling is more or less what Curious said. That person thought Himiko being fascinated by blood was wrong, she actually calls it a ‘tōsaku’ (倒錯 “perversion”), albeit one she labels as common, and tried to force Himiko to suppress her feelings so she could perceive herself and socialize with the others in a ‘correct’ way.

An interesting difference between the manga and the anime is that in the anime that person’s talk is more streamlined... and we see her also talking with Himiko's parents.

? ‘Hai kyōsei shite ikimashou futsū ni. Sō desu ne… tsuyoi kosei o motsu ko niari-gachina tōsakudesu yo. Kono shakaide wa yoku aru kotodesu. Sei shite keshite ikimashou.’ ?「ハイ矯正していきましょう普通に。そうですね…強い個性を持つ子にありがちな倒錯ですよ。この社会ではよくあることです。正して消していきましょう。」 ? “Yes, let's correct it and make it normal. It's a perversion that is common among children with strong Quirks. It's a common occurrence in this society. Let's correct it and eliminate it.” [Ep. 158]

This might imply that in the manga that person is actually busy with more things at once, she doesn’t have a lot of time to dedicate to Himiko’s parents and therefore she doesn’t have a lot of time to dedicate to Himiko.

Back to the conversation though, regardless of the source, the person talking makes clear that what Himiko does isn’t just something that’s “rude”/“inappropriate” to do in society but that it’s a “perversion”, a common one, yes, but a “perversion” and she says so to her parents who were already worried she wasn’t human.

Chichioya ‘Mō nekko ga!’ 父親「もう根っこが！」 Father “Her core/roots is/are already– (gone/rotten)!”

Hahaoya ‘Ningen ja nai ko un jatta!’ 母親「人間じゃない子産んじゃった！」 Mother “I gave birth to a child that isn’t human!” [Chap. 392-Ep. 158]

And later

Hahaoya ‘Watashi-tachi ga waruin desu. Mō… tsugunai kirenai desu… ganbatta kedo damedattan desu… ano ko ha… akuma no konan desu.’ 母親「私たちが悪いんです。もう…償い切れないです…頑張ったけど駄目だったんです…あの子は…悪魔の子なんです。」 Mother “It's our fault. We can never make up for it. We tried our best but it was no use. That child is a demon's child.” [Chap. 226]

So Quirk counseling didn’t really reassure her parents nor solved Himiko’s problems. They weren’t going to accept that Himiko could have different feelings from the norm and help her to cope with them correctly, they just wanted to eradicate them from her. As she couldn’t, she was forced to suppress them… and since she couldn’t keep them bottled up forever they eventually exploded and lead her to hurt Saito.

The last time Quirk counseling comes up is at the end of the manga.

? ‘Tsudzuite wa TEAM-UP NEWS. INGENIUM, FROPPY, CREATI soshite URAVITY ga zenkoku no shōgakkō o megutte imasu. Teki (read: VILLAIN) hasseiritsu no genshō ni tomonai katsudō no haba wo hirogeru “HERO”-tachi sono naka demo-- URAVITY no uchidashita “kosei” COUNSELING kakuchō keikaku wa ima mottomo hitsuyō fukaketsuna katsudō to iwa rete imasu.’ ?「続いてはチームアップニュース。インゲニウムフロッピー・クリエティそしてウラビティが全国の小学校を巡っています。敵（ヴィラン）発生率の減少に伴い活動の幅を広げる〝ヒーロー〟たちその中でもーーウラビティの打ち出した〝個性〟カウンセリング拡張計画は今最も必要不可欠な活動と言われています。」 ? “Next up is team-up news. Ingenium, Froppy, Creativity and Uravity are touring elementary schools across the country. As enemy (read: Villain) occurrence rates decrease, the “heroes” are expanding the scope of their activities. Among them, Uravity’s “Quirk” counseling expansion plan is said to be the most essential activity right now.” [Chap. 430]

In this bit it seems that expanding Quirk counseling became a key factor in lowering the occurrence rate of Villains… which, of course, doesn’t seem to be possible since in almost all the other cases in which Quirk counseling was mentioned it turned out it either didn’t work (with the Masegaki elementary school kids) or made matters worse (Himiko and the heteromorphs). Is it a typing mistake as apparently the program already reached all the elementary schools so it didn’t need to be expanded and, anyway, didn’t work? Or does ‘expanding’ refers to actually put more resources and people in Quirk counseling so they can actually devote more time to the kids and help them better? Hard to say.

LOOKING AT THE CULTURAL CONTEST AND WHAT IT TELLS US

Counseling in Japan

While, of course, there’s no Quirk counseling in Japan, by 2006 Japan had school counselors (スクールカウンセラー) available in all the public middle schools. Prior to it though, this work was entrusted to the homeroom teacher (担任教師 ‘Tannin kyōshi’) and often also the school nurse (看護教諭 ‘Kango kyōyu’ ) who were meant to dispense discipline, encourage better conduct, increase motivation, provide career guidance, and offer advice. Those teachers though, were not trained in counseling, and it was often a duty they disliked, often choosing to use their classroom hours for something different than “moral education” depending on their personal educational agenda. Now instead, when problems arise, the teacher or the students or the students’ parents can ask help to the school counselor, which would also offer the plus of being a third party figure, so that they would be people not involved in evaluating students (and therefore have no conflict of interests with them) and would be professional in the field of psychology so as to offer better help to them.

Currently in Japan a school counselor visits a school about once a week to give children advice about various problems they face. School counseling is provided by clinical psychologists, psychiatrists and other professionals with expertise in mental health issues. In addition to advising children, the counselors can advise parents and teachers about how to handle their own day-to-day. A school counselor stands by in a counseling room where he or she listens to children’s problems one-on-one. Children can seek advice about whatever may worry them, such as relations with their friends, their family problems and uncertainties about their future and the counselor will advice them about how they should handle their problems while also talking with their homeroom teachers about what would be the best solution to each problem.

The problems with this system are often that the Clinical Psychologist isn’t also trained as a school counselor which leads with problems of interaction with the teachers, that there is confusion about the role of teachers and school counselors, and that there’s a HUGE stigma of shame at the idea of students or parents seeing a counselor. Much of the counseling that is now conducted in the Japanese schools is remedial with the individual as the focus; an approach that is contrary to the Asian interdependent view of self, an approach that seems to further exacerbate the student’s reluctance to see the school counselor.

It’s possible Horikoshi went for a mix of the above, with Quirk counseling given both by the class homeroom teacher and by a specialist… and the improvement was that the specialist was better prepared for the job or that he were to spend more time than once a week in the school… or that Quirk counseling originally was given by the homeroom teacher and then, Uraraka’s expansion program improved it by having it being given by a third party figure who was more competent than the teacher. Hard to tell.

Honne, Tatemae and Giri

Honne (本音 “true sound”) refers to a person's true feelings and desires.

Tatemae (建前 “built in front”, “façade”) refers contrastingly to the behavior and opinions one displays in public.

Giri (義理 “duty”, “obligation”) refers to the social obligations each person have.

Okay, fine, why should we care about these three words? Because Japanese people go to great length to hide their honne (true feelings) and show their tatemae (facade) so as to fulfill their giri (social obligation). They must do everything they can to avoid the disapproval of others, to avoid direct confrontation or disagreement. They’re completely justified in telling white lies to hide their true nature and present their Tatemae, so completely justified they can lie even in trial, that they’re expected to do so (remember when, in chap. 306, a guy said Enji should have just lied in regard to what Touya declared?).

Part of the Quirk counseling plan is clearly based on this, on teaching children how to show a socially acceptable tatemae and hide their own honne. This is what Himiko was taught, that her own fascination for blood was an unacceptable honne and needed to be buried inside herself if she wanted to be ‘normal’. That it was her duty to present herself as ‘normal’ and therefore show solely an acceptable tatemae.

Tōsaku (倒錯 “perversion”) and double meanings

As said before ‘Tōsaku’ means “perversion” and it’s used to describe how Himiko is fascinated by blood… but this is a word also used to describe sexual deviances… and Horikoshi clearly had fun with using words with double meanings in Himiko’s case, for example the onomatopoeia for sucking blood (ちうちう ‘chiuchiu’), sounds also like the onomatopoeia for kissing, Himiko is referred as a ‘ijōsha’ (異常者) which can be translated as “deviant” but also as “pervert” and so on. In short Horikoshi subtly create parallels between Himiko’s love for blood and the fact that Himiko’s way of loving people is not what in Japan is labeled as normal (she also loves girls and not just boys and would like to hurt people she loves). So, while Himiko’s problem of being fascinated with blood might seem distant from the audience as people in real world don’t have a Quirk that makes them fascinated with blood, the parallelism with sexual inclinations bring Himiko back into someone with whom people can relate and, in a way, someone that stands in parallel with Magne.

Heteromorphs, how ‘not normal’ they are meant to be and blood impurity

In English the word ‘Igyō’ (異形) had been translated as “heteromorph” but a better translation is “abnormal” or, more literally “not normal shape”. In a Quirk counseling program that aims at making everyone ‘normal’, who already starts with a name that states they’re not with a normal shape is clearly cut out of the race.

When Shouji talks of what was done to him he mentions ‘chiharai’ (血祓い “blood cleansing”) [Chap. 371] and, in the previous chapter, he was told he had ‘imi chi’ (忌み血 “cursed blood”) [Chap. 370].

Japan is very invested in blood purity, in pre-Meiji era Shinto and Buddhist traditions considered blood (血 ‘chi’) a source of symbolic pollution or ‘kegare’ (穢れ “uncleanness”, “defilement”) with elaborate rituals of avoidance and purification, however, in the Edo period (1603–1868) blood gained the positive meaning of “lineage”/”life force”, overtaking the preceding key metaphors for heredity. This though ended up causing the solidification of a hereditary status system that placed certain groups of people as being permanently “polluted” because they had works tied with blood, like executioners, undertakers, slaughterhouse workers, butchers, and tanners called ‘eta’ (穢多 “great filth”) as well as beggars, street performers, prostitutes, convicted criminals, and the physically disabled among others called ‘hinin’ (非人 “not people”) which together form the group called ‘burakumin’ (部落民 “village people”) and were considered outcasts. Their own blood was considered permanently impure, they were subject to increasingly stricter sanctions that prohibited their contact and mixing with the rest of society by means of restricted residences, economic activities, special clothing, hairstyles, and tattoos and since now blood also was a term used to define lineage, its polluting property also came to be regarded as inheritable and permanent which is why people still don’t want to marry (aka ‘mix blood’) with people whose ancestors were ‘burakumin’.

This was also made worse from the 1900 eugenicist obsession with blood as a medium to modernize the Japanese race and nation.The pure Japanese blood, or “Yamato blood,” was now heralded as a refined superior substance to be protected or enhanced through social programs of reproduction and health also through eugenic marriage counseling services.

This ultimately expanded to include people who had mental illness or familiar with mental illness but also with people who are of not pure Japanese ancestry. We would probably talk about genetics. In Japan it’s referred as blood.

Blood type is, in Japanese mentality, also tied with personality and discrimination can be so high that some would just discriminate people with blood type B or AB as negative stereotyping credits the B types as selfish, and ABs as eccentric and unpredictable and therefore more prone to have a loose morality.

As a result even if Shouji being a Heteromorph is tied to his Quirk and his genes, the story talks about his ‘cursed blood’… and people could refer to it also in relation to how the Todoroki are related to a criminal, Touya/Dabi.

(Plus this also tells you why Himiko's fascination for blood could NEVER be accepted since things related to blood lead to impurity)

While all this doesn’t tell us much about Quirk counseling, it helps to get a better perspective on why blood is mentioned when Heteromorphs are discriminated and how strong discrimination can be based to blood ties, clearly making it something that can’t be overcome with just the discriminated person in question trying to ‘act normal’ by presenting an acceptable ‘tatemae’.

The series leaves unclear what exactly falls into the Heteromorph category because, if the problem is just the shape being not normal, things like having tapes in your arms or engines in your legs, or horns on your head also give you an abnormal shape. Overall we can assume that the more the shape is abnormal and hard to ‘disguise’ as normal, the more one ends up being considered as an Heteromorph (Shouji’s arms are a much more visible ‘abnormal’ trait than Iida’s legs or Sero’s arms).

Just so you know currently Japan lacks any law which prohibits racial, ethnic, or religious discrimination nor has any national human rights institutions. Although racism exists it’s a taboo topic. In the past in the name of national unity, the Japanese government identified and forcefully assimilated marginalized populations, which included indigenous Ryukyuans, Ainu, and other underrepresented groups, imposing assimilation programs in language, culture and religion. Japan considers these ethnic groups as a mere “subgroup” of the Japanese people and therefore synonymous to the Yamato people, and does not recognize them as a minority group with a distinct culture. This is why in the story Heteromorph discrimination isn’t punished but it could also be the basis for why the Quirk counseling doesn’t keep into consideration how Heteromorphs are different but tries to force them too to act ‘normal’.

Quirk

We’re all familiar with the term Quirk that in Japanese is ‘kosei’ (〝個性〟 always written between quotation marks) which, translated literally means “individuality” or “personality”. In a country that is group oriented, values uniformity and thinks standing out is bad, Quirks that instead grant an even more marked ‘individuality’ and that are unique to each person, should feel like a big deal… but also it you tie a superpower with your personality you might get some unpleasant combo that aren’t really meant to be. For example thing at Tomura and at how his Quirk destroy/decay things. If you think that his Quirk is his ‘personality’ or tied to it, you get the idea Tomura is someone who can only destroy/decay, that has a destructive character or that who has an animal Quirk has an animal character.

WHERE ALL THIS LEAVES US?

Japanese youths have been fighting so as to have their individuality recognized in various subtle ways but it’s still an ongoing battle. The same goes for the descendant of the Burakumin and for people in the LGBTQ+ community. Sadly most of those topics are kind of considered taboo to discuss in Japanese culture so it’s possible that Horikoshi’s attempt at saying that Quirk counseling would be improved is a subtle message that’s meant to say that in the BNHA world steps would be taken to improve the acceptance of those people and the recognition of each person’s individuality, implying more a change into mentality/education than a change into some institutionalized thing called ‘Quirk counseling’, hence he didn’t need to develop much how it would work.

Of course mine is purely speculation.

Ultimately, if we solely look at the story, how Quirk counseling work/is administered is hardly well explained in the story, and how is reformed is explained even less (saying just it underwent an expansion) as well as why Uraraka, who had no idea of Himiko’s problems with Quirk counseling, decided to focus on it. But it’s likely the cultural context that’s meant to make it work for Japanese readers using solely what little is explained as reference and, for them, improving it, is likely a big step.

For whose of us who are instead cut out from the whole cultural context, there’s just too little to work with and it feels forgettable and confusing.

Okay, my analysis originally was meant to end here but then chapter 431 was released and it talked about Quirk counseling and so I added this extra bit.

CHAPTER 431 AND WHAT IT TELLS TO US

In the volume version only chapter 431 we have a last mention of Quirk counseling, which ‘shows us’ a bit how it’s done now.

Uraraka Ochako ‘Masaka senpai-tachi no tsugō ga tsuku to wa‼ Kitto minna yorokobimasu!’ 麗日お茶子「まさか先輩たちの都合がつくとは‼きっと皆喜びます！」 Uraraka Ochako “I never thought my seniors would be able to make it! I'm sure everyone will be happy!”

Tōgata Mirio ‘Ore nankade ī no kana‼’ 通形ミリオ「俺なんかでいいのかな‼」 Tōgata Mirio “I wonder if I am the right person for this?”

Hadō Nejire ‘Nande sonna koto iu no? Fushigi!’ 波動ねじれ「なんでそんな事言うの？ふしぎ！」 Hadō Nejire “Why would you say that? Strange!”

Amajiki Tamaki ‘URAVITY no “kosei” COUNSELING ni kyōryoku dekiru nante kōei da yo.’ 天喰環「ウラビティの"個性"カウンセリングに協力できるなんて光栄だよ。」 Amajiki Tamaki “It's an honor to help Uravity’s ‘quirk’ counseling.”

Uraraka Ochako ‘Kono gakku no jidō no shiryō-me o tōshite moratta to omoundesu kedo nani yori daiji na no wa COMUNICATION desu. Ikken nan no mondai mo nai ko demo nayami o shimaikonderu koto ga ōi desu. Daishō towazu toku ni katei kankyō nanka shotaimen no otona ni hanaseru hito wa ōkunai desu. Demo jikan o kakereba kanarazu SAIN o dashiteru koto ni kidzukeru node shiryō ni tayori sugizu! Meyasu wa ikkagetsu teido desu ga naiyō shidai de zenzen hendō shimasu. Kazu wa ishiki shinaide otomodachi ni naru tsumori de!’ 麗日お茶子「この学区の児童���資料目を通してもらったと思うんですけど何より大事なのはコミュニケーションです。一見何の問題もない子でも悩みをしまい込んでる事が多いです。大小問わず特に家庭環境なんか初対面の大人に話せる人は多くないです。でも時間をかければ必ずサインを出してる事に気付けるので資料に頼りすぎず！目安は一か月程度ですが内容次第で全然変動します。数は意識しないでお友だちになるつもりで！」 Uraraka Ochako “I think you've looked through the materials about the children in this school district, but the most important thing is communication. Even children who appear to have no problems often keep their worries to themselves. Not many people, can talk to adults they meet for the first time, about problems big or small, especially about their home environment. But if you take your time, you'll definitely notice the signs, so don't rely too much on the materials! The guideline is about a month, but it can vary greatly depending on the content. Don't worry about numbers, just try to make friends!”

Amajiki Tamaki ‘Taihen da ne.’ 天喰環「大変だね。」 Amajiki Tamaki “That's tough.”

Uraraka Ochako ‘Zenzen! Jin'in no SUPPORT wa jūbun desu shi minasan sugoku teinei na oshigoto o sarerun desu yo. HAWKS ga monkashō ni kake attari kakusho ni kyōsan o tsumettari shite kurete “kosei” kyōiku no kankyō wa daibu kaizen sarete kiterundesu.’ 麗日お茶子「全然！人員のサポートは十分ですし皆さんすごく丁寧なお仕事をされるんですよ。ホークスが文科省に掛け合ったり各所に協賛を積めったりしてくれて"個性"教育の環境はだいぶ改善されてきてるんです。」 Uraraka Ochako “Not at all! There is enough staff of support and everyone does a very careful job. Hawks has been negotiating with the Ministry of Education and providing support from various places, and the environment for ‘Quirk’ education has improved considerably.”

Amajiki Tamaki ‘Jā ima wa jibun no tame no jikan mo torerunda?’ 天喰環「じゃあ今は自分の為の時間も取れるんだ？」 Amajiki Tamaki “So now you have time for yourself?”

Uraraka Ochako ‘Gimu toka… sekinin toka nai wake ja nai desu kedo ato kara tsuitekita mono desu. Yorokobu kao o miru no ga suki nandesu. Watashi ga yaritaikoto shitemasu. Tsuyu-chan mo hobo zutto TEAM-UP shite kureteru shi tomodachi to mo aeteru shi zenbu jibun no tame no jikan desu yo!’ 麗日お茶子「義務とか…責任とかないわけじゃないですけど後からついてきたものです。喜ぶ顔を見るのが好きなんです。私がやりたい事してます。梅雨ちゃんもほぼずっとチームアップしてくれてるし友だちとも会えてるし全部　自分の為の時間ですよ！」 Uraraka Ochako “It's not that I don't have obligations or responsibilities, but they came after. I like to see people's happy faces. I'm doing what I want to do. Tsuyu-chan has been teaming up with me almost all the time, I've been able to meet up with my friends, and so it's all time just for myself!” [Chap. 431] Now, I’m not 100% sure if the idea is to always involve Pro Heroes or ‘the supporting staff’ can be composed also of ‘not Pro Hero’ people, but we get a general idea of what the people who decide to take part to the project should do. They read the documents about the kids, they’re encouraged to make friends with them, possibly/likely involving them in a game in which they use their Quirk which will allow them to receive what we can call ‘Quirk positivity’. All this in order to help children to open up and talk about their (Quirk related) problems. This last for around a month then, if no problems are detected (or if they are but they’re solved by that time), the people involved move to another school.

Now… maybe it’s just me but this is basically what was done during the ‘remedial course’ arc with the kids from the Masegaki school, only, they’re given documentation about the kids and, instead than lasting one time, it last one month and it involves Pro Heroes, not Heroes in training who might not be interested in interacting with children but are forced to do it if they want their license.

In this sense the whole ‘expansion’ thing of chapter 430 finds it’s explanation. Heroes are expanding their activities (aka also taking part to other activities like Uraraka’s Quirk counseling program) and the Quirk counseling program is being expanded as well as now its scope isn’t anymore to just help children to fit into the standards of normalcy society created but to offer them Quirk positivity and to create a connection so that THE CHILDREN will be willing to talk about their problems with Quirk and with their family.

Storywise it’s a pity the original characters involved in the ‘remedial course’ arc aren’t mentioned as being involved in all this, especially Shouto (who not only had an extremely troublesome Quirk related family situation plus a brother with problems with his Quirk who almost killed himself, was targeted by a Villain, became a Villain and eventually died). Yes, we can picture they are, but, as far as canon is concerned, he isn’t mentioned AT ALL, not even as one of the sources of inspiration for how Uraraka’s project is structured (canon also didn’t show Bakugou or Shouto talking about their remedial course with classmates) but okay, this isn’t really related to Quirk counseling.

Now with all those additional info I can talk a bit of something else aka:

REALITY CHECK

Uraraka’s project is nice and well meaning but it’s also very fairytalesque, in the same way as Hawks claiming that Heroes having free time would be a good thing. It’s all well and good and, since BNHA is a tale, I’m sure it’ll work like a charm and if you want to stop reading here and enjoy such a happy world I’ll understand you.

However if you want to know if this will work in the real world…

In the real world, if the request for Heroes were to decrease because there are less Villains (and having less Villains would surely be a good thing), it wouldn’t mean people would hire the same amount of Heroes and keep on paying them just the same, we would simply have more unemployed Heroes or society would self regulate itself by simply giving out less and less Hero licenses. In short, society would NEVER allow Heroes to have more free time, it would just hire less Heroes or, in the very best case, pay them less. Sure, the problem can be solved with Heroes reinventing their job, for example volunteering to take part to Uraraka’s Quirk counseling project so as not to lose their job and their source of income.

With this though, comes a worsening of the main problem I see in Uraraka’s Quirk counseling project.

There is no mention whatsoever that the people involved are TRAINED to spot (Quirk related) psychological problems. Kids with psychological problems (due to their Quirk and family environment reacting badly to their Quirk) aren’t necessarily always showing a villainous behavior or a transgressive behavior (which is what Heroes are trained to spot), they can be acting as ordinary well behaving kids, or be meek or be people pleasers or vivacious but apparently harmless kids.

While it’s true that elementary school kids are generally more direct in their actions and reactions, some of them could have already mastered the fine art of hiding/masking things for fear of repercussions or due to them being educated to lie about certain things or even being made believe in such lies so they don’t even know they’re lying anymore.

Quirks, it’s worth to mention, don’t necessarily manifest at 4, they can manifest as early as their childbirth (see the luminescent baby or AFO himself), and sometimes a child can be born in a house where the ‘Quirk problems’ are caused by the parents’ expectations (think at how Enji wanted his children to have a certain Quirk and inherit his place). In short they might have been forced BY BIRTH to interact with ‘unpleasant’ situations and might have also been forced to learn to cover them up.

Fuyumi for example, lived in a toxic environment but, likely, masked that up well. Himiko took longer at learning to mask it up well, but her Quirk manifested when she was 3/4 and gave her a really strong instinct, for which she was left with zero family support (actually her parents’ reaction is completely out of proportion, kids at that age do plenty of stupid and gross things and then can grow up perfectly normal provided they’ve normal parents to guide them, there was totally no need to beat Himiko up and panic like that) and yet she learnt to mask it perfectly by the time she was in middle school, possibly even sooner as the journalists couldn’t find early signs and they likely searched for them like starved piranha.

In truth even professionals might miss the signs or might approach children in the wrong manner, causing more troubles than good because it’s a HARD job… so the idea that if completely untrained adult people who just read some data about the children (which might have been written by who already missed the signs or is misinformed about the real situation of the children) were to make friends with them, they would surely get them to open up or would surely notice signs that something is wrong and act in the appropriate manner to fix it is… well… very naïve.

It’s well meaning and it can surely help in some cases but, unless Japan had a REALLY ABNORMAL PROBLEM so that the TINIEST help would make a BIG difference, don’t expect the big change the press is talking about… especially if Heroes who have no more Villains to capture and zero interest in helping kids will be ‘forced’ to join the program so as not to become unemployed.

On the other side the lack of psychological preparation in people can be very well explained with how there’s a strong stigma in Japan regarding psychological problems.

The reason why real life normal counseling is often not used in Japan is because Japanese people don’t want to talk with a Clinical Psychologist (as said before now that’s the specialization a counselor needs to have) so Horikoshi’s ‘hey, but those people are normal, well meaning people, possibly even Heroes kids admire, not psychologists so talking to them doesn’t mean you’ve psychological problems so you can totally open up with them safely’ is meant to address this fear and, of course, it’s better to talk to an untrained person than not to talk at all so in this vein, this could be seen as an ‘improvement’.

I don’t know but I guess this is now really all we have about Quirk counseling.

Said all this, which is likely still an incomplete overview, I hope my ramblings will help people to understand Quirk counseling better. If not, I apologize.

[imthepointe]

The design of armin’s titan is really important and we need to talk about it

Recently I’ve been thinking about how each detail of armin’s colossal design is intentional and… ow.

First, I see a lot of people on here saying that his titan doesn’t have any ears so he doesn’t hear the screams of his victims. Personally, I’ve never seen any evidence to actually substantiate this — I also don’t think that this would be very in-character for Armin. A primary feature of his development between the s3-s4 ts was that he became really almost consumed by guilt, including guilt for what he had to do in Liberio, so it makes more sense that he would force himself to hear every scream as a form of punishment. Armin definitely does not censor himself from any of the suffering he causes — in a way he’d probably think he deserves to be tormented by what he’s done.

Whew! Anyways, now that that is settled. Take a look at his titan:

As @1ceb3rg pointed out in a recent post, his titan largely resembles a skeleton!! Armin’s titan powers are inherently linked to death, given the way he acquired them (and the sacrifices other people had to make in order for Armin to live). And the skeleton is…well, it’s a universal symbol of death. Also worth pointing out here that armin figured out how to defeat the colossal through its bones — the muscles burn up in the steam but the bones don’t. His titan has much less muscle mass than bertolt’s, because that’s what killed him in the first place.

But let’s talk about his face.

His titan has no ears, no nose, and big sunken blue eyes. A skeleton also has no ears or nose.

There’s probably another reason his titan doesn’t have a nose, though. Think about Armin’s cute rosy button nose in human form. I don’t know exactly what interview it was but Isayama wrote that he “gave Armin a round nose to make him seem mild-mannered and weak while also giving him some kind of unique trait.” In other words, Armin’s nose is a physical representation of his weakness. By designing his titan without a nose, Isayama’s trying to convey that Armin is both physically no longer as fragile as he used to be and has psychologically toughened his resolve. After he was forced to strategize and think on his feet as he was in Shinganshina, Armin lived, ultimately, by developing that mental strength. He would not — he could not — give up. In season four, we really see this development in his tenacity , strategic thinking and leadership. His titan’s lack of a button nose signals this character development. He’s no longer mild-mannered or weak.

Oh! Another feature about his face is the sunken features. Doesn’t Armin look just sad? His large eyes, typically a distinguishing feature of his character, are ... lackluster at best. They’re small, sunken in and downturn. They’re a gray-blue, not his typical royal blue (or hazel, depending on who you ask). His wonder, his curiosity, has faded. He no longer has to speculate as to how Bertolt felt all those years ago in Shiganshina.

As to Armin’s character looking “sad,” we know that Armin’s first real experience with his titan powers was his dream while he was unconscious after transforming and eating Bert. This is what he sees:

Half of the colossal titan is crying. The other half is a skull — with a completely different bone structure. And no nose.

One, this reinforces/confirms the idea that the colossal titan is based on the skeleton and connected to death. But more importantly, it shows us the titan expressing deep sadness. It’s crying, from a sunken, grey-blue eye. If, in that moment, Armin’s titan was being formed in the Paths — he had just gotten the colossal, after all — then it’s possible that experience was emblematic of the shaping and reforming of the previous colossal to the next holder. Armin’s titan appears sad because he was literally crying as it was being formed.

TL;DR: armin’s titan is a physical manifestation of the character development he experienced post-midnight sun

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer park Steve AU pt 44

part 1 | part 43 | ao3

cw: recreational drinking

“You’re just…” Robin looks at him sideways, her face doing something quivery and weird that he’s pretty sure is supposed to be sympathetic concern but mostly looks like she stubbed her toe right after smelling microwaved fish. “You’re sure it’s not too soon?” 

It is. 

It definitely is too soon.

Steve’s pleasantly buzzed at a New Year’s Eve party — some random rich kid’s house, loitering in the space between the living room and kitchen so he and Robin can properly people watch (see also: be hugely judgmental bitches about the fashion sense of the girls on the dance floor and the sloppy form of the guys doing keg stands on the back deck) — and Steve just opened his fat, drunk mouth and casually admitted to being in love with Eddie. 

Eddie, the guy who hated him for years. The guy who tried to knife him the first time they interacted as neighbors. 

The guy whose silhouette has started to fill the passenger seat in Steve's Winnebago dreams. 

Eddie’s here, but he’s not here; probably posted up somewhere in the basement so he can deal to the stoners and the horny kids playing Spin the Bottle, and Steve— 

Steve knows he falls too fast. Always has, but especially now. Steve fell for Eddie like a gunshot going off: a deafening bang, gurgling fish sounds, blood all over the floor. He kinda thinks he couldn’t help it. Kinda thinks he’d do it again. 

And how could he not, when Eddie smiles at him like that? When he takes him apart so sweetly with his words, his lips, his tongue? When he dragged Steve by the hand into the back pew of a midnight mass on Christmas Eve, giggling about how he was shocked his satanic worship hadn’t set the bench aflame? 

Yeah. 

Steve totally understood why Jesus got up on that cross. 

“Oh, my god,” Robin rolls her eyes with a strangled huff. “Are you seriously just—? You’re fucking hopeless.” 

Yeah, he is, and yes, he is. “No,” he insists, crossing his arms over his chest and trying not to feel like a defiant kid who got caught lying to his mother, because yeah, he totally is spacing out into lovesick La La Land while being actively accused of spending too much time there lately. “I’m not fucking hopeless, and it’s not too soon.”

Robin gapes at him like 'are you kidding me right now?' “Steve!”

“Robin!” he answers, mimicking her tone. Wow. Vodka makes him petulant. 

It makes Robin stubborn as hell. She juts her chin out and hollers over the music, gesturing so aggressively she almost spills her drink, “Admit that it’s too soon!”

“It isn’t!” Steve shouts back; digs his heels in and refuses to budge, never mind the fact that it’s only been, like, three weeks since Eddie fingered him for the first time oh, god, don’t think about Eddie’s fingers right now.

They stare at each other for a second, Robin’s nostrils flaring with the words she so clearly wants to yell at him, her breaths coming hot and harsh, and then, with a long sigh, her shoulders deflate. Her chin comes down. She bites her lip again, teeth turning the skin white as her eyes go big and sad. Worried. She's worried for him because she loved him first. 

Steve smiles at her, a quick, closed-lip thing that feels more like shrugging with his mouth, and he leans into her space; pats her cheek and thumbs her chin until she stomps chomping on her lip.

“You’re gonna get it all chapped,” he says in a hush, hoping her Steve translator is still intact after a couple drinks. Hopes she knows that he’s really saying ‘I hear you’ and ‘I love you, too; I love that you care’ because they're at a party and god does he not feel like saying sappy friendship shit out loud. 

Robin’s eyes get misty. Just for a second — message received; copy that — and she clears her throat and shakes it off. Points at something over Steve’s shoulder and drags him to the other side of the room.

—

part 45

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[paymechildsupport]

I should have really been in bed five hours ago, but these leaks make me wanna commit heinous acts and I just gotta do something about this Sukuna pic cuz erm… just :3

He’s just so….. <3

EHEHEHHEHEHEHEH I don’t know what it is but the idea of having such a powerful, destructive man just down at my feet is so intoxicating jsjshdbdbdb

Just imagine his humongous form in your sheets in the latest hours of midnight— just an amalgamation of limbs on your bedspread

Drowsy and drunk off sleepiness, fighting off exhaustion in that soft cushiony state between consciousness with his big arms swallowing your much tinier body up, head on your chest

You’d absentmindedly run your fingers through his wolf hair, nails scraping his scalp in such a way to elicit tiny sounds of contentment

He in no way would be silent: bro will be sighing and huffing and even just purring occasionally,- exactly like an old cat or dog. You’d feel every noise vibrate, bouncing around in his large chest, pressed against your torso

The second you fall asleep and cease to shower him in affection he’d immediately get incredibly offended

He’d take it personally, and man’s can hold a NASTY GRUDGE (look what he’s doing to poor Yuji 😭)

He’d let out a rather audible, “hmph”, and make a show of pulling himself off of you, making sure he woke you up

“How dare you, pathetic mortal”

HE’D SULK

He’d be both very bluntly aggressive but also passive aggressive in every. Single. Thing.

He is entitled to your time, your attention, your affection, your every waking thought should be dedicated to him and him alone. He should be first priority over everything

JAJSJDBBDBS Y’know how in like superhero movies the villain sometimes has this really adorable cliché where they are this absolutely brutal, horrible monster whose committed numerous misdeeds but have a wife / spouse they treasure above all else? Like, they’ll be in the middle of explaining their plans of world domination when their wife all of a sudden calls out that dinner’s ready, — and then all of a sudden the villain is this esteemed gentleman who’s just really really excited to have some lasagna his darling wife made for dinner?? They really just wanna keep their spouse outta all the crime and such cuz they know they hate it and always get scolded for it.

yeah, that’s the only way I’ve been coping for these past leaks 🥶

Sukuna would be in the middle of nuking the map when all of a sudden you pull up

He’d be talking all high and mighty, saying how he’d obliterate and kill all of Yuji’s loved ones when suddenly he hears his name get called out and he’d just FREEZE.

“Quick, act like I didn’t just murder your closest kin like three minutes ago.”

”what? Why??”

“Because my spouse is here and they’ll actually skin me alive if they see me like this 😡—- hey honey ☺️ how’s it going..?”

Like tensing up, eyes bulging, lip quivering, sweating BULLETS, the most scared anyone’s ever seen him. Immediately dropping everything, disregarding the accumulating mass of cursed energy he’d been saving up for the past twenty minutes, to turn around and give you his best, most charming smile

You’d just walk up to him and like, grab him by the ear, yanking him down to your level to curse the ever living daylights outta him

“Stop going out and bullying teenagers 🤬 you miserable old man I swear—“

And he’d just stand there and TAKE IT. You’d scold him exactly like a disappointed mother, personally escorting him off the battlefield and profusely apologizing to Yuji for your husband’s actions

He’d just be all sad, walking away and dragging his feet, moping, back hunched, hand holding yours 😭🤏 and leaving an incredibly confused Yuji

And then you adopt Yuji and Sukuna stops being a grumpy old man and my boy gets his happily ever after and we all hug it out :3