#doing something to feed or house or get medical help for someone once in your life

[hussyknee]

These are really fucking important tags, but I also want to plug what I've been saying on here for eighty thousand years that the current state of Western leftism is no better. It's just hyperindividualist Protestant capitalism whose entire political "praxis" is centered around consuming only the non-problematic, finding whatever oppositional side to form a heroic cult around (see: Tankies), and using diversity tokens to deflect criticism (see: BLM and progress flag in bio). It's basically all about trying to find moral cudgels and tribal markers, instead of giving one single shit about harm reduction, material help for people in crisis or any commitment to centering and boosting the needs and voices of the oppressed. The middle class may be disappearing but the newly disenfranchised have taken all that white bourgeoisie self-involvement into leftist movements which they have now appropriated, gentrified and segregated from each other in ineffectual silos of festering resentment and little else.

History isn't a disparate collection of stories from long ago. It's the necessary context for the present moment and the forecast for the future. All histories are intertwined, and the narratives of power and privilege, oppression and resistance, adversity and triumph are as constant in their patterns as the laws of physics.

[strawberrymilk-sunshine]

My personal little experiment

Heeeeere's another Jade fic hehehehehehe-

Warning(s): slight yandere behaviours, manipulation, body horror-ish

There's a weird disease going around recently... it has some fancy scientific name, but most people just call it "mushrooming"

Basically, this new species of mushrooms popped up basically out of nowhere, and people learned very quickly that they can grow on people... and they feed on flesh.

So.. it's not great for people. You've had it particularly rough... your left eye has been consumed and replaced with a mushroom growing out of the socket, and a lot of your flesh is rotting... according to doctors, you should be dead... but you're not.

And oh boy... this unique scenario you're in was about to attract some unwanted attention to you.

You sit in a hospital waiting room. You've tried to cover as much of the rotting as you can. Looking around the waiting room, you see people with various injuries. Sitting directly across from you is a small girl with a mushroom growing from the top of her head... you can only hope her illness doesn't progress to the point yours has...

"Is there a (Y/N) here?"

You sigh and stand up, being led to the room and now waiting for the doctor. It takes a while, but eventually he arrives. A young redheaded man you've gotten quite acquainted with over the course of your infection, Dr. Riddle Rosehearts.

"Hey Riddle." You sigh, pulling down your hood you were wearing. "So... how have you been...?"

"I've been... well. However, you look worse than I remember." He sighs. "Have you been taking the medication I prescribed?"

"Yeah. It's working really slowly, if it's working at all."

"Your condition is just going to get worse and worse if this continues... I really do not want to do this, however..." Riddle writes something down on a piece of paper, and hands it to you. "Please visit this man, he may be able to help you more than I. Just be warned, he can be quite..." Riddle pauses, looking like he's searching for the right words. "He's quite eccentric."

"...I see. So... he'll be able to help me with this... advanced case of mushrooming?"

"He might."

"Okay... well then, if that's all you wanted me here for, then... I'll be going now." You stand up and put your hood back on.

"I look forward to seeing you get better."

The address led you to... a house outside the city walls. It looks quite... overgrown.

You knock on the door.

You wait for a few minutes, before knocking again. Eventually, the door opens ever so slightly.

"Who is it? If you're a member of the authorities, allow me to reassure you once again there is nothing illegal going on here."

"What?? N-no, I... I was sent here by someone, uh, D-Dr. Riddle Rosehearts..."

Then, the door opens, revealing a six-foot-tall man that definitely gave off some... strange vibes...

"Oh my... what an unfortunate situation you're in... your eye has been consumed and replaced..." He smiles. "Please, come inside, sweet child..."

When you enter the house, the scent of damp mustiness and decay hits you all at once... the room is somewhat organised, but there is still little space to walk. Piles of paper and books cover the floor and tables. Jars of mushrooms and plants line the shelves... it kinda freaks you out.

"Now, sit yourself down and tell me about your condition. I'll make us some tea." He smiles.

"...So you've been infected with Carne Comedere, have you?" He asks, as he sits down next to you, sipping his tea. "It's interesting that you've survived to this point, especially when the fungus is being... this intense to you." He smirks, chuckling slightly. "You are quite the... interesting specimen. May I ask your name?"

"...it's (Y/N)..." You say, taking a sip of the... surprisingly bitter tea. "And... who are you? Dr. Rosehearts didn't really... tell me who you are. He just sort of... gave me a piece of paper with your address on it and told me to visit you."

"Ah, good to know he's doing that. You see, what I do is not exactly legal within the city walls. As such, I prefer people don't know m name right away." He pauses, before looking straight at you. "That being said, you look trustworthy.... my name is Jade Leech."

"Wait it's not legal-?"

"Now, if you'd please stay still for a moment, I just want a small sample of one of your mushrooms, okay?" He pulls out a pair of scissors.

"Oh, um... o-okay..."

Jade stands up from his seat, walking over to you. He begins to comb through your hair, until he eventually finds a tiny mushroom, and he uses the scissors to cut it from your body.

"Why not just take the one from my eye...?"

"Well, you see, that one is in a very sensitive spot... who's to say what damages I could cause if I were to take that one out!" He sighs and pats you on the head a few times. "We wouldn't want that, correct?"

"...I-I guess I see what you mean..."

He takes the "sample" and brings it over to what you assume is his kitchen, and he begins to observe it.

"Yes... yes, it's quite interesting... Carne Comedere, the flesh-eating mushroom... you have quite an advanced variant..." He places the knife down on the counter, and cuts it in half. "It's so strange that you've survived to this point. I'd love to study you... but of course, you're counting on me to cure you... so perhaps I will not!"

You don't like the way he worded that...

The days go by and you keep visiting Jade.

He keeps taking samples from you... the mushrooms, your skin, your blood... he keeps giving you strange substances, but you aren't getting any better...

One day, you decide to confront him about it.

"Hey Jade, I... I'm not getting any better." You tell him. "Nothing you're doing to me is working..."

"Oh really? What a shame." He smiles deviously. "Here, lease have some of this meat."

"What-? No! Tell me why I'm not getting any better!"

"Why should I? You should trust me. I'm your doctor, after all." HE pauses for a moment. "Well... actually, I am not legally allowed to call myself a doctor... I suppose I'm more of a healer... regardless, you should just trust me."

"Not until you tell me why I'm not getting better..."

"You're sure you want the truth?"

...

"Fine then. I've decided not to cure you."

"WHAT-?! Why the hell not?!"

"I want to see how far it will progress. I want to see the extent of what your body can survive… after all, you've survived much longer than anyone would in your condition… so I'd like to test your limits." He hands you the plate of meat. " Now, we need to make sure the mushrooms inside you continue to live, as such you must have protein to build more flesh and muscle for it to feed on… of course I'll provide you other foods every now and again to keep you alive and healthy, but for now it's important I feed you meat. Enjoy."

"But you told me you would cure me-!"

Jade shoves the piece of steak into your mouth.

"Oh goodness, no. Not in your state. Your infection has progressed to such a point that it would be MUCH more beneficial to keep you like this so we may study the mushroom's long-term effects on the body!" He giggles to himself. "Not to mention, I never said ANYTHING about curing you!"

"I-I'm going back to Dr. Rosehearts, I can't deal with this..."

"No no no, we can't have that! I have so many things I need to do to you... I need to take a blood test… and a sample of both the mushroom and your skin… and a full body exam… ohhh, I need to do so many things to you~ Now sit still."

He suddenly injects you with some kind of syringe...

You try your hardest to ignore the increasing feeling of dizziness and exhaustion...

...

But you're just so tired now...

You slowly lose yourself to the... whatever he injected you with...

"Yes, yes... go to sleep, my personal little experiment...~" He smiles in an almost evil way. "Don't worry, I'm only doing this to you for the betterment of humanity!"

Even in your current state, you can tell he's lying to you...

"I'll see you again soon, my patient."

[bijouxcarys]

I didn't have anywhere else to kind of talk about this, and I need to get it out of my system somehow, so I'm just putting this on here. Maybe someone can relate to it?

TW/ self-harm, suicidal ideology, please don't read this if it's going to potentially trigger you.

If you don't think this will trigger you, I still suggest you read on. Anyone around you could be experiencing this right now, and it's a very real thing.

Here's the reality of living as an adult with autism, who wasn't diagnosed until the age of 18.

It fucking sucks. To put it mildly.

Growing up as an undiagnosed autistic child is difficult. Especially if you are beaten down verbally by everybody to the point where you believe that you are, in fact, a bad kid. I'm convinced that's had a hand in why I'm so paranoid about my relationships with people. If I'm doing something to upset or annoy them.

You spend your entire childhood being told that you're the problem, when you're just trying to fucking survive in a world that's hard enough to live in without the added stress of developmental disorders, and you're going to believe for the rest of your life that you're the problem.

That is, unless you're able to go and see a therapist or counsellor.

Which leads me to my next point: we are conditioned to believe that we aren't allowed to ask for help, because we can never take on the advice anyways! 18 years of being told that I'm being dramatic, by my own counsellor as well, definitely dampens your willingness to attend any kind of talk therapy.

You get trauma building up over time from the rejection sensitivity, the amount of friend groups you plow through, the anxiety and depression that come as a result of how your brain is wired. It's not even that you have depression or anxiety; a lot of the time, they are symptoms of our autism. But they don't care. They'll feed us antidepressants.

I've been on antidepressant medication for a long time now. I'd argue about 6 years. I'm 22 now, on 200mg of sertraline daily. Last year I tried to come off my medication. Big mistake. Realised I'm kind of fucked without it.

Back in 2019, I used to take my antidepressant in liquid form because I had a sensitivity to swallowing pills. One day, my inability to read social cues and communicate effectively with my friends led me to drink the whole bottle of Fluoxetine.

When you're undiagnosed with autism and you have to go through regular life every day, it's damaging. So dangerous to the mental health of the child. The more we are put in situations that can overstimulate us, and overwhelm us, the more it takes from your ability to cope with life. You get beaten down, and beaten down, and beaten down, until you're an emotionless entity wandering the Earth with no solid ambitions or aspirations. You've spent your entire life in defense mode, mirroring everyone's behaviour and personalities so that you feel the tiniest bit "normal" out of pure survival, that you lose a sense of who you are as a person. You feel stripped of your personality. You don't know what you're doing.

Then you get thrust into the real world. What the fuck am I supposed to do now? I don't know how to survive in a world that isn't made for me. I don't know how to tell people I'm autistic, because a) they very rarely understand what I mean by that, and what it entails, and b) I don't even know enough about my autism.

Why? Because I wasn't diagnosed until just before I turned 18 - got discharged from CAMHS (Child and Adolescence Mental Health Service) once I turned 18, with no referral to a counsellor that could help me, and no information on what the fuck I should do next.

I've stayed in education because it's the only thing I know how to survive. I went to college, university, and now I'm doing a master's degree online. And I still don't really know what my goal is in life.

I have no friends, and I flip-flop between being upset about it and being absolutely fine with it. I don't leave the house, I don't work, I even struggle to do the most basic of daily tasks.

I'm constantly fantasising about a life I could have, but ultimately realise I can't have.

My brain is fucked up, and I am traumatised by the life I've had to live and survive in. And now I'm stuck in survival mode.

And I don't know how to live, instead of simply exist.

That's where the suicidal ideology comes in. I'm constantly thinking about how much easier everything would be if I did just off myself. But the thing is, I'm not actively planning it, but the thought brings me great comfort. There's always a way out. And I can't expect that I'll leave this world any other way.

Now... when an autistic person, or any person, tells you that they don't want to die, but thinking about killing themselves brings them a sense of comfort and contentment... there's something wrong there.

There's nothing I want more than to start living. But when it takes 110% of my energy to do the bare minimum... living becomes synonymous with existing.

Not being taught how to deal with the meltdowns, the overstimulation, the understimulation, the food sensitivities, the way the world functions... has fucked me up, for myself, and for everyone else around me.

And when given the choice between spending the rest of my life putting all my energy into living the way I do now, and killing myself and saving myself from the pain, the latter sounds far more enticing.

I don't want to die. But to live is too much of an enigma to want anything other than the silence.

[thenasoneshots]

Bruno Oneshot - You Can Always Find Help in Friends and Family

Requested?: No

Prompt: None

Type of oneshot: Fluff? (idk what to call this)

Reader's Relations: None/Best friends with Agustin (Cause he’s Bean)

Warnings: Mentions of death

Other notes: This randomly came to me after rereading the backstory for Gabriella (one of my Encanto OCs), just to say you own a flower shop… This takes place a few months after Isabela gets her gift (therefore all other character ages are adjusted accordingly)

-----------------------

I sighed looking down at the many bunches of flowers that were starting the shrivel up in the shop, feeling my stomach starting to rumble a bit as I hadn’t eaten anything apart from one slice of bread, and it now being around 3 in the afternoon. It had been difficult for me, my father had died before I was born and my mum had died when I was 18. Since then I’d run my mother’s flower shop, selling flowers to the townsfolk. This is what actually led me to meet the person who would become my best friend. Agustin would come to the shop at least once a week to buy flowers and I soon learned he was smitten with Julieta and was trying to impress her by constantly giving her flowers. To start with, I thought it was adorable that he was so in love that he’d buy flowers every week for her, but then it started to become more frequent and eventually, I just started giving them to him for free knowing they were going to a good cause.

It was a few months after Isabela got her gift that I noticed that the flower shop was losing business. I knew why, obviously, it was because of her gift as she could make flowers appear of out thin air, and she was doing it for free. Due to this, I started to not be able to make enough money to feed myself or take care of myself properly. I knew no one would miss me if I did end up dying from starvation or something.

I had been busy watering the flowers in the shop, just on the off chance that someone would come in when I slipped on a wet patch on the floor, “Mierda,” I muttered to myself standing up, only to fall back down again from the water in the floor. I growled and started to crawl over to where it was, soon wincing in pain at my ankle. I let out an exasperated sigh and pulled myself up by leaning on the counter, putting my weight on it as I grabbed an icepack I had just in case of emergency.

“(Y/n), hello!”

I quickly hid the ice pack under the counter and stood up, leaning my weight on the top so Agustin wouldn’t be able to tell anything was wrong, “Hey, friend! Let me guess the normal?” He nodded, a blush overtaking his cheeks, “Yeah.” I smiled and placed weight on my foot to see how it would hold up, and I was unable to hold back the wince and sharp intake of breath.

“You’re hurt. (Y/n) what happened?”

“I’m fine, just tweaked my ankle a bit when I had a fall. It’s nothing serious.”

“You’re wincing in pain. Trust me if anyone knows anything about pain, its me.”

“Yeah, I know, Mr Accident Prone. I’ll be f-PUT ME DOWN!” I interrupted myself when Agustin picked me up and put me over his shoulder, “No, you need help. I’m taking you back to Julieta so you can get your ankle healed, then I’ll come back with you for the flowers.”

I growled and continued to hit him in the back as he walked towards the Madrigal’s house, “You puta! I'm fine, I do not need medical attention! Put me down! I am fine! I told you it’s just a tweak, I can walk it off!”

Despite my protests, I ended up in the kitchen of the Madrigal’s house, my leg propped up on another chair as I sat down, Julieta making a batch of arepas.

“How did you manage to break your ankle, (Y/n)?” she asked, wiping her hands on her apron.

“I did not ‘break’ it. I just tweaked it. Could have just walked it off!” I grumbled, “I tripped over a patch of water I didn’t realise was on the floor in the shop.”

“Oh, well here you go, eat up and you’ll be back to yourself,” Julieta replied, shoving one of the now-cooked arepas into my hand. I reluctantly took a bite and felt the pain go away. I stood up and thanked her before walking to the kitchen door, but I felt her grab my wrist and gasp, “(Y/n), have you lost weight?”

I rolled my eyes, “I don’t see why that’s any of your concern. Now let me go, I have flowers that need watering.”

“Are you eating enough? You know you can talk to me about anything.”

I pulled my arm from her grasp and continued towards the door, when Castia trapped me in the kitchen, “Stupid house,” I muttered to myself, sitting back down, knowing there was no arguing with the magic house, “Fine! To be completely honest, no I’m not. I haven't had a decent meal in months, in fact, haven’t had a decent meal since Isabela got her gift! Since then hardly anyone ever comes to the shop to buy flowers as they can get them for free from her, no one wants to buy flowers.”

“Oh, dear. Eat up, come on you need food, (Y/n),” Julieta responded, placing the remaining arepas in front of me.

“You’re not mad at me for talking bad about Isabela? I mean, she’s your daughter and I’m basically blaming her, a 5-year-old, for my problems!”

“Of course not, it’s not your fault that is what Isabela’s gift is, (Y/n). Now, eat.”

I gave her a small smile and took another arepa, seeing Julieta mutter something to herself. A few minutes later, Bruno walked into the kitchen, “Julieta, Dolores told me you wanted me to come down?”

“Yes. If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like you to look into (Y/n) future. I’m worried about her and the flower shop.”

My eyes widened, “It’s fine, honestly! I’ll be fine, you don’t need to trouble yourself with my personal issues. I mean, they’re called personal issues for a reason.” Before I could say anything else, Bruno had grasped my hands, his eyes glowing green. A few minutes later, he let go and I noticed a slight pink tint to his normally dark skin.

“Bruno? Are you alright?” I asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. He seemed to snap out of a daze and looked me in the eye. I’d got to know him at Julieta and Agustin’s wedding, and since then I’d grown a crush on the youngest triplet.

“Bye,” he spoke, turning around and leaving, but I grabbed him before he could, “If it’s something bad, tell me so I know to prepare myself. Please.” I took a shaky breath and bit my lip as he turned around again, “I-I… Fine, whatIsawwasustogetherandeventuallymarried!” I saw the pink in his cheeks grow and I let out a small giggle, “Wow. That’s not what I was expecting you to say. I was expecting something along the lines of that ‘You’re going to wither away to nothing because your flower shop is going to go out of business’.” I spoke, giving my best impression of Bruno for the last statement, “Not that what you saw isn’t welcome to me,” I continued tucking a hair behind my ear, not noticing that Julieta had left the kitchen, leaving the two of us alone. Bruno’s head shot up, his black curls bouncing, “Really?” I giggled again and nodded, “To be truthful, I’ve had a crush on you for a while.” His eyes widened and his smile increased, “T-that’s like the best news I’ve ever-” he was cut off when he fell over, bumping into me, causing the two of us to end up on the floor of the kitchen.

“(Y/n), c-can I kiss you?” I felt my face heat up and nodded, “You don’t need to ask.” With that said, I leaned down, as I’d landed on top of him, and kissed him.

“Does this mean you’re going to be our Tía now?”

I broke off immediately and stood up looking to the door to see Isabela and Dolores standing there, the latter with a smile on her face, causing me to guess that she was the one that had asked the question. My face went bright red, “We’ll have to see about that, Dolores. Maybe in a few years.” Isabela then walked over and I bent down to her level so she didn’t have to crane her neck to look up at me, “I’m sorry.”

“What for? Isa, you have nothing to be sorry for.”

“It’s m fault you haven’t eaten well. I don’t deserve this gift, your flowers are so pretty! I see the ones Papí brings home for Mamí. They’re so pretty!”

I gave her a smile, deciding to sit down on the floor, “It’s not your fault, Isabela. Listen. You were given your gift because it would help the Encanto. You do so much by giving out flowers and making them grow. The village looks so amazing with the flowers you grow.”

“But it’s made you lose busy-ness!” she squeaked out as a reply, “I have an idea! I can grow flowers and then give them to you to sell!”

I smiled, feeling my heart melt at how much she was willing to do for me, someone who she barely knew, probably only heard of my name, and wasn’t part of her family.” I just gave her a small pat on the head, “Isa, you don’t need to do that. I’ll be fine.”

--------------------

“Can you tell us the confession story again? PLEASE?!”

I smiled and gave Glacia and Estrella a kiss on the forehead each, “I’ve told you that story before,” I responded to the two 3-year-olds, “I could always tell you the story of when Camilo managed to get stu-”

“Tía! Please don’t!” I stood up carefully, and turned to the door, to see Camilo there, his face slightly pink, “You said you wouldn’t ever tell that story!”

“Did I? I don’t remember tha-” I cut myself off when I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, “Camilo, help, my water broke.” His eyes widened, knowing what I meant after both Antonio and the twins, and ran over supporting me so I wouldn’t fall over, muttering, presumingly talking to his sister. A few minutes later, Bruno came rushing into the nursery, the rest of the family behind him. 

----------------------

Several hours later, I was holding Alieta in my arms, lying on Bruno’s bed, and the rest of the family was allowed back in, the only ones in the room before were Bruno and Julieta. The twins came running in and up to the bed, still arguing about who was going to be a better sister, causing me to giggle, “You two want to meet her?” They immediately stopped squabbling and nodded and Bruno lifted them onto the bed. I smiled as they crawled over and I showed them their now sister, “Say hello to Alieta.”

They both said their hellos and I felt my heart melt. I soon let out a yawn, it now being very late at night and Bruno took Alieta from me, placing her in the small crib that had been set in the room ready. Julieta walked over and offered to put the twins back to bed, something I was very thankful for as the minute I laid back down, I fell asleep.

----------------------END OF ONESHOT

Yeah… not too happy with th ending of this one… For info on my ocs, go to my toyhouse: HamiltonAttorney2277 https://toyhou.se/HamiltonAttorney2277/characters/folder:4585111 

[badluck990]

Day 12: Search & Rescue

TWs: Failed Rescue, kidnapping, Buried alive(kinda), poisoning, 

Let me know if I missed anything

“Alright, Agent Wild Card, you’re all clear. We’ll see you back soon.” The medic helped her down from the scanning booth as she wished her well.

“Site Manager Double doesn’t think it’ll take long, from what drones have picked up the maze isn’t too complicated. But then again, if there was nothing to be worried about there wouldn't be a mission.” Wild Card rambled, mostly to herself as she set out.

The Agency’s job was to handle…well, a lot. They mainly took on magical instances, like the cabin that had popped up in the forest a couple months ago, but they’d also handled things like kidnappings and disappearances. Granted they’d gotten involved because scouts had noticed some strange things that implied magic or anomaly. In short the Agency dabbled in a little bit of everything since you never know what’s a normal case and what’s a little strange until you start digging.

Hence Wild Card Going to some corn maze. Scouts had heard word of people going missing but when running a test with a drone, once someone was in, they’d disappear halfway through. She bid her love & mentor – Agents Silver & Chance respectfully – farewell before making the long journey. The plan was simple: search the perimeter before going inside with a drone locked to her and try to find whatever she could. It put her in just a tad of danger of getting caught, but sometimes most of the time the belly of the beast was the only way to find anything.

Upon arrival a lady greeted her, “Hi love, you hear to make your way through the haunted maze?” 

“Isn’t that more of a halloween thing?”

“There’s year round haunted houses, why not a maze.”

“Fair point, but how do you keep the corn healthy all year long.”

“Oh it’s all fake stuff.” 

It really didn’t look like it but the only way to get answers was through, so much for checking the perimeter. She followed the left wall running into a couple of actors: chainsaw person, shadow people, even a pretty horrifying garden of sorts. People were buried below their neck and begging for help as an actor playing the gardener poured a watering can over them.

“Agent Wild Card can you still hear us?” her earpiece asked.

“Loud and clear, I’ve disappeared haven’t I?” “Not entirely but you’re glitching on our feed. We’re gonna guide you to the exit.”

“Roger that.” She followed the directions describing her location when they couldn’t see her, only to walk to a dead end, “I think something mixed up, I’m at a dead end…”

“What? Cameras- ing- open- run- come-” And the line went dead.

“Curses. Guess I’m on my own…” Wild Card continued wandering, lefts and rights and lefts and more dead ends, and cheesy fog machines. She started to walk past someone dragging themselves towards her as they yelled, “Ma’am! Over here.” Don't be distracted. “Don’t leave, please!” Don’t fall into some horror trap – or actual trap – where he grabs you. “Help me!” We have people to rescue and need to get out of here. “Ma’am please, I’m not an actor!” And she stopped dead in her tracks. Please don’t be a trap..

She walked over and knelt close to them, up close she could see the injuries were very much real, “Okay, first aid’s only gonna do so much but can you give me a name while I work?”

“Sammuel Roer, my buddies brought me here for my birthday but we got to the end and that gardener lady came out of seemingly nowhere,” they dug their hands into the dirt trying not to squirm as Wild Card patched them up. “We all blacked out pretty hard after that and woke up-”

“In the garden..” Wild Card guessed realizing those calls weren’t just for ambiance, “Bloody Hell. Okay, I have no idea where an exit is so here’s the plan. I’ve patched up all I can, I’m gonna give you something. My work will find you and get you medical attention. Try to hide in the corn itself so you’re harder for the ‘actors’ to find you. Is it just her?”

“I-i think so, I heard her talking to someone and calling us ‘fellow actors’” She nodded and gave him her earpiece hoping for the best before searching for the garden once more.

“Drink up my beautiful flowers,” Trap sang as they cried for help, the girl had long walked away but it didn’t stop them from hoping she’d be in earshot.

“You do realize that’s flesh, not Cellulose?”

“Aw, pretty sunflower came back. Won’t you be pretty.” Wild Card made a move to attack her only for a vine to be wrapped around her foot.

“Tsk tsk, don’t be difficult before you’re even planted love.” The greeter from the beginning cooed behind her controlling the vines that coiled around her, the poison in their thorns making her grow light headed.

Back at the agency a Scout was giving a report to Site Manger Double, “Matt offered to go in for recon, only he tried to cut right through the corn to the tracker in her earpiece. He said the plants seemed to have a mind of their own but couldn’t decide if they wanted to grab him or push him out. He got out okay thankfully.”

“Okay so if that didn’t work then-,”

“He tried going through the exit where the greeter wasn’t positioned. We told him it was a dumb idea but he insisted and shockingly it worked.”

“So to summarize,” Double started, “Good news: We found one of the missing persons, bad news: we have no idea where our Agent is.”

“Not unless the guy is stable enough to talk.”

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

TW: emotional/psychological abuse, dehumanization (<- main focus), neglect, physical abuse, mentions of starvation, mentions of sexual abuse, bad mental health(?)

Looking for: Advice, support, reassurance, to hear someone elses thoughts/reactions and resources if possible? (it's an oddly specific situation, so no big pressure on the resources!)



Sorry if this doesn't make too much sense, I know my situation is rather unique and unrelatable but I was hoping to hear some outside option please, I just.. am overwhelmed? I don't quite know how to be a real human.

With the first people I stayed in I wasn't allowed to learn to speak and I was given set tasks to do and there was a system. Didn't do the task? get punished. Make sure you stay in your room, don't make noise, don't have needs, don't try to be a person when you're a tool. Not saying it's healthy, but it made sense. I knew what to do and I knew what my role and position were. It didn't matter too much that they would forget to feed me or that my room was mostly bare and not quite.. clean, to put it one way. Or that they sometimes got too rough with me when punishing and nearly killed me multiple times. It just reinforced the rules. Do what you're told and leave the humans alone. Simple times.

The next people I lived with weren't as bad, comparatively. I'd say they're great, but compared to the average healthy parents I believe they'd be categorized as not so great? Out of all the kids that they had fostered eventually I was the last one remaining (rest got sent away because they didn't follow the rules enough). Once I had learned language enough I made a deal with them; I would do whatever they said as long as they didn't punish me. It mostly worked.

I did all the work they asked me to do, including helping raise my foster siblings (when they were still there), helping with construction work (power tools, lifting, design, etc), and helping with emotional support for the people (mostly the one) and her clients.

I was allowed a room and for a while allowed out of the house and when I was younger I was allowed to have full on back and forth conversations! But as I got older I was less worthy of privilege and deemed less human. According to them, and this is something I was (to a degree) raised with, I am "an alien subspecies masquerading as a human, and quite poorly at that".

It got to a point where I wasn't really allowed to speak much unless spoken to (no physical punishments, but I got many talkings to and told many.. unpleasant things, to put it one way), sometimes had my rights to things such as water or medication revoked when I wasn't completing my work fast enough (physical work outside), and for many years have had my diet semi-restricted to a 1-meal-a-day system.

It's odd, because the first people I lived with were far worse, but it seems more unfair the second people would behave in such a way?

But I managed to move out, literally by collecting all my things into a few suitcases and flying a far distance from them, and I don't know how to react?? Like I don't understand what people want from me. There's no clear rules in the expectations of behaviours, no orders or demands or anything of that such and I am very lost.

I'm well aware that I am technically human, but I don't know how to be a human. I was born and built to serve and take orders, I was literally a replacement for many, many other children that other adults didn't want (or could no longer have). But without the structure of clear expectations, no matter how badly they sometimes felt, I have no purpose.

What do I do without purpose? I don't have things I enjoy or hobbies or friends or a support network. I don't have wants or desires or dreams or goals. I literally cannot feel hunger, I barely feel the cold and I don't usually feel thirst. I can and have gone days without eating, I've gone days without drinking, I've gone days without sleep, I've gone weeks without ever speaking. But now I don't know what to do at all. I've managed to get a job so I do have income so I don't end up on the streets, but would that really be so bad?

I was 4 before I was taught how to speak instead of imitating the animals that raised me more than any human had up to that point. I'm used to it, it is what comes naturally to me. Humans make me uncomfortable, I don't like even knowing that they're in the same building as me, let alone seeing and interacting with them. I wish I wasn't expected to suddenly be one too, because I don't know how to do that, I was never given a guide. It's so draining and tiring, sometimes I wish I could sell myself to be a pet of some sort, at least I'd know what my role and how to fulfill it would be.

This is a bit of a mess, but do you have any guidance or advice or opinions or anything at all? I cannot really speak to anyone I somewhat know, especially any of the new people I may meet (and the rest I know are still in contact with the parents I got away from, and they all view those parents as amazing lol). Sorry if this is too heavy, I know that other humans never really understand what it's like to just.. not have such a vital piece of experience.

Hi anon,

I'm so sorry to hear about what you've been through.

It sounds like you were conditioned in various ways to essentially be subhuman. In your second living situation it sounds like you were subjected to child labor as well as parentification, and then as you grew up the punishments became more strict and cruel. I can see why you say this is more unfair in a way, especially considering the circumstances you came from.

I can't imagine how disoriented you must feel to be raised by people like that and then leave those spaces. I know it may be hard to believe, but most people, thankfully, aren't that horrible. I personally had a hard time realizing that most people aren't horrible after growing up around many reckless ones. It's very easy to fall into cynicism and nihilism with these kinds of experiences. But there is still the entire human population to compare them to, you know? I like to think that for every bad person there are two good people. This isn't to take away from your experience, but to help put things in perspective and hopefully provide some faith and hope in humanity.

I know it's not always affordable or accessible, but I think you may greatly benefit from having a therapist who can help you undo what you've been taught about your role in the world. Nobody else can define your purpose but you, and a therapist can help you wholeheartedly acknowledge this. You deserve to take up space, you deserve to do what you want to do. You don't deserve to be hurt or punished for human error.

I hope I could help. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[froshele]

hell yea brother (gender neutral)

listen im getting formally married real soon (together nearly a decade) and I've already seen some shit. I know what the fault lines of this thing are, i know all the little ways in which we both suck, and I know how to navigate them

sure it's not realistic to say its all sunshine and roses (we are conclusively out of the honeymoon phase and have done our time actually labouring together to the benefit of the commons; she has the entire tumblr gauntlet of conventionally diagnosed mental illnesses at once (and i am not going to lie on tumblr dot com about what it means to combine bipolar, bpd, ocd, asperger's, a somewhat tenuous relationship to the visions that falls short of schizophrenia, and adhd)

but its not meant to be, no human relationship is! you need a network your spouse is just one part of

i love my wife and even when i dont love the life we have now i know that we got each other and we can weather anything, even the racist and antisemitic antics of our current landlord

sometimes one or both of us is miserable or has some fucked up shit going on (her geometry visions and fear of middle aged women, my cycles of psychosomatic inability to do anything and weird tormentous brainworms) and that too is the human condition

its the human condition that we have different cleaning standards and chores we hate! sometimes the house is a hovel due to we are both human syndrome and this too is the human condition

but you know what, i get to watch her eyes light up every time I cook something nice (most nights)! I get to show her how to do the things she can't do! she gets to optimize things for her mandatory enrichment (computer science major) and i get to teach her about social skills and motivations (anthropology guy) and reassure her about various medical anxieties (becoming a physician so we can give our cat and ferret and future kids a good life)! i have never felt like anything i liked was cringe or bad or ugly and even my craziest most insane boundaries are respected!

she likes my hyperhidrosis!!!!

she gets to come home to hot bath and i get to be brought delicious outside food (mate feeding) (tremendously enriching)! she gets to talk to me about work and i get to tell her about work! whenever one of us starts failing the other picks up the slack! And oh my gd there's someone to hold when the nightmares and the visions come around again. and we can not always help the nightmares or the visions or their consequences (one time she took the car and ran away from home and I just sat there with my hands in my lap like well i cant call the usamurican police on my very brown wife, and she has the car, what did she want me to do here? daven i guess?) but we call on our support system to help us and hell i mean like. is this not what contentment is like? when you wake up and go to sleep safe and comfortable, and someone is always there to sit in the empty chair designated for them in your soul? and every morning coffee, and every evening tea?

this is pretty great actually i like it lots. no sign of the way marriage is Meant to Suck yet!

[rainyearning]

Mhir made a face: "Where I come from, it is rude to reject hospitality when invited so just take it as it is. I told you, I do not mind you being here like that." It made him a bit sad since he was happy to have the other over like this, it was nice having visitors which was rare those days, everyone was too busy with working and their own lives. His fingers played a little with the man's hair when he was rubbing his head against him. Looked like human cats were a thing but he really did not mind that feeling at all. "Enjoy the meal, there is no reason to worry so much," he moved the plate over to the other, rolling his shoulders a little as he was thinking about it. "Well, I guess these people fall more into the: want to fuck a bad boy? I mean, I guess I come more off as soft and marriage material in like ten years from now." It was a little embarrassing to admit as much to a stranger. "Anyway, I will let you eat now and get some blankets. You should sleep on the couch, I'd prefer that instead of thinking of you napping on the street. I already have this desire to push your back a bit, your shoulders look awfully stiff... ysh, as a medical this is hard to look at," there was a hint of a pout on his lips.

And the hospitality was happily taken. it was just that Yoongi wasn't used to the kindness. Especially in his cat form, many people threw things his way, some kicked him, when he got too close. And despite all that, he would still not shy away fro anyone that approached him. he knew many humans had a stressful life and maybe they didn't hate hi but just, well, life in general? He believed in good, was seeking the good and he would never turn down food or a war place to rest. "Most people that see me throw things at me and don't feed me tuna, so you can be very certain that I appreciate all of this. I can help in the house, if you need something. I sure can do the dishes?" When the plate was in front of the cat, Yoongi would just start eating, right away. Yes, the can of tuna had been good, but he actually needed much more to really satisfy the hunger that built over a while. He was a poor cat, after all, with no skills useful for society. "I don't get why people are so much into bad people. In the end they are, well, bad." He replied with a full mouth, swallowing, before he kept talking. "Why does someone willingly want to be threatened badly when there are kind people out there? I don't get it. I would choose you over anyone else." And he meant it, to him, right now, Mhir was the best person ever. "The streets aren't so bad once you know where to rest, and my normal shape makes it easier to fit small places." He sat up a little when his posture was mentioned and he let go of his fork to rub at one of his shoulders. "See, I was kicked by a group of guys a few weeks ago, I guess my shoulder is just still a bit sore." And despite saying this, there was a smile on his face. "Please don't worry."

[animeomegas]

MY FELLOW ANON ARE VIOLATING MY EMOTIONS TODAY 😂 god I’m acc crying. Your writing is amazing. I’m gonna combat the sadness with a wholesome thing of them finding a pup in a bin (or something) a few months after the loss of the first pup (Neji is currently shut down entirely) is like “lol gimme”. Proceeds to take the pup home, put it in his nest scent the lil bean (gender is your choice) and just be like “yeah this mine now”. Any nay sayers are ignored bc it’s still his baby (maybe almost like his pup reincarnated 👀👀) regardless of how baby was obtained. Idk I just think my guy needs some positivity after life kicking the ever loving shit out of him

This is beautiful and you’re right, Neji deserves the world, but I’ll settle with a quiet life and some happiness for my boy!

Okay, so things haven’t been…good with Neji since you had to let your pup die to save him.

It has been two months and still he lays in his nest every day, sometimes crying, sometimes whining, but mostly just staring at nothing. He had incorporated a bunch of baby stuff (blankets, toys etc.) into his nest before he went to the hospital, in order to make his pup feel more at home in the nest when he was supposed to bring them back. You had tried to take them out to stop him having to be confronted with what happened in his safe space, but Neji almost attacked you for doing so, so you let him keep them.

But it’s very concerning when he spends hours at a time just stroking the pup's blankets and staring at nothing.

So, you decide to take Neji on a walk to get him out of the house. It would be his first time leaving the house since the funeral.

You go at night time, because Neji is still refusing any contact with anyone he knows and this way he’s less likely to be confronted when he isn’t ready for it. To make extra sure that you can be alone, you decide to walk around the edge of the woods around one of the quieter training grounds.

Neji doesn’t speak much, but he doesn’t whine or cry either, and the night air brings a little colour to his cheeks, and you’re so happy at the small improvements. It doesn’t matter how long it ends up taking him to feel better, you’ll be here with him the whole way.

…

“I was thinking about cooking something special next week,” you make idle conversation, not expecting Neji to reply. “It’s our anniversary after all, do you have any preference?”

Neji stops walking suddenly. His shoulders are tense.

“Neji?”

He hushes you harshly.

“I can hear…”

Without another word of warning, Neji makes his way a little further into the trees. You follow him, confused and worried.

“Byakugan!” he calls, scanning the area. He gasps as he scans over a nearby bush and immediately he drops to his knees beside it.

“Neji?” you ask, now more than a little concerned. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

You watch as Neji pulls something out of the bush. He turns around with a bundle in his arms.

“It’s a pup,” Neji says, obviously shocked. You can’t blame him, you’re feeling more than a little shocked yourself. What on earth was a pup doing out here? “They’re freezing. Give me your jacket.”

Without hesitance, you quickly slip your jacket of and hand it to Neji who promptly bundles up the pup in it and brings them to his chest. The pup is making small whimpering noises that had been almost impossible to hear over the wind. Neji must have hear them, thank goodness.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you,” Neji coos to the pup. “You’re safe now, I'll take you home and make it better, I promise.”

“We need to get them to the hospital asap," you say, shaking your head. "They must be freezing and they look underweight as well. We’re not mednin, Neji.”

“Our home is closer.”

“Neji…”

“We need to make sure they’re warm,” he argues. “We can bring them home and alert a medic to make a home visit.”

You look at the earnest look on his face and know that he won’t back down, and now isn’t a time for arguments anyway.

“Okay,” you swallow nervously. “We’ll bring them home.”

…

You bring the pup back to your home and before you can protest, Neji brings them into his nest with a mumbled ‘they’ll be warm in there’.

Neji bundles himself and the pup up in the corner of the nest, turning on a little heater beside him, and tucking the pup into his shirt to share body warmth.

“We’ll get you nice and warm, it’s okay, you’re safe, I won’t let anyone harm you,” he whispers while stroking their cheek with a finger. The pup wriggles around, already looking more energetic, and starts mouthing at Neji’s chest.

“Are you hungry?” Neji laughs softly before turning to you. “Go and heat up a bottle for the pup, all the supplies are in the… the nursery.”

You nod dumbly and do as you’re asked, astounded at how much life is in Neji’s eyes. It’s the most life you’ve seen from him in months. But you can’t help but worry. What if Neji gets attached and you can’t keep the pup? Of course, you want nothing more than to keep the baby, it almost seems too good to be true that she literally fell into both your lives at this trying time, but what if it is too good to be true? What if they’re sick? Or their parents are looking for them? Or… something else. Neji doesn’t deserve another heartbreak, and you don’t want to destroy the small amount of progress he’s made in the last month.

But for now, all you can do is heat up the bottle.

…

“Here, it’s a good temperature, I already checked,” you pass Neji the bottle. He checks it again anyway and you can’t help but smile at how overprotective and parental he's being. It's so bittersweet to see him like this.

“Here you go sweetheart, just for you,” Neji smiles, cradling the pup as they latch onto the bottle with fervour. “Shh, shh, shh, slow down, it’s not going anywhere.”

Neji feeds the pup and then burps them, and you pretend you can’t see him smiling when he notices that they are starting to smell like him. You need to know you can keep her before you let him get even more attached.

“I’m going to send a clone for a medic, now.”

The room became tense all at once.

“They’re fine, I’m looking after them,” Neji protests.

“I know, and you’re doing a good job, but we still need a medic, Neji.”

Neji holds the pup more tightly to his chest, tucking an extra blanket around them. He's using the special blanket you had got commissioned for your pup. You can feel your heart break at the sight. He's already attached. Now you just have to hope you can keep them. For his sake.

“I don’t want them to take the pup away like last time,” Neji admits softly. "I can look after them, I won't let anything happen like last time, I promise. They'll be safe, we don't need a medic."

“We need to know their primary and secondary gender, omega, and we need to make sure they aren’t sick after being left in the woods…”

Neji hesitates but nods his consent in the end after you explain that your pup could become ill if left untreated. You don’t tell him that you are also sending a clone to the Hokage. Naruto will be able to grant you and Neji the right to keep the pup, and you hope that as Neji’s friend, he’ll be able to see how much he needs this.

…

You have to move Neji and the pup downstairs to wait for the medic, because Neji would not appreciate someone unknown seeing his nest he made for his pup. He’s not expecting Naruto to show up as well so you go to the door to intercept and prep them both.

“Thank you so much for coming, Naruto, I can’t tell you how much this means to me and Neji,” you say, hugging him as he walks through the door.

“I’m going to do everything I can,” he promises. “If the medic finds signs of long-term neglect, I can take the parental rights away from the biological parents straight away, even if I don't know who they are, and transfer you the rights.”

Your face visibly brightens, but Naruto continues.

“But if the only injuries are from laying in the forest for a few hours, I’ll have to try and find the parents first, because the child may have been taken from them by force, when the pup was otherwise a healthy baby being looked after sufficiently. In that circumstance, I’ll have to take the child back with me and put them in foster care until a three-month window has passed. And if the parents are found…”

“I know,” you sigh. “Let’s just get this done as soon as possible.”

The three of you walk into the living to see Neji cradling the pup tightly against his chest.

“Hey Neji,” Naruto greets softly with a sad smile. “I haven’t seen you around for a while.”

Neji tenses upon seeing Naruto.

“Naruto? Why are you here?” Neji clearly misinterprets the situation, holding the pup even more tightly and turning accusatory eyes against you. “Why did you bring him here?”

“I’m here to determine whether the pup was abandoned or kidnapped to the best of my abilities, once we have that done, we can decide how things are going to happen, okay?”

“How do you decide that?” Neji asks with distrustful eyes.

“The medic will give them a check-up, completely routine, I promise,” Naruto speaks with a soft voice like he’s talking to a cornered animal. Well, you look at Neji for a moment who is coiled as tightly as spring, he’s not far off.

It takes about five minutes for you to convince Neji to let go of the pup and hand them to the mednin, and then the next fifteen minutes involve you holding him in your arms to stop him wrestling the pup back from the mednin.

And then, rather ominously, the mednin pulls Naruto aside to talk.

Neji is shaking in your arms.

“It’s okay, calm down, Neji,” you try to comfort him.

“I can’t-“ Neji chokes, hands fisting in your shirt. “He has our pup, you let them take our pup.”

You don’t bother to correct him on his use of ‘our’, knowing it would only upset him more.

“I know baby, but they need to see that they’re healthy, nothing’s wrong, just breathe.”

Neji doesn’t take your advice.

"Last time they took them-"

"This isn't like last time, omega. Come one, try and settle down a little, that's it."

...

Naruto eventually walks back in, holding the pup securely, the mednin nowhere to be seen.

“So,” Naruto says seriously. And then his face breaks out into a wide grin. “Am I right in thinking you want to adopt?”

You can almost feel your relief in the air. Thanking every power that be for this stroke of luck. Losing this pup could have easily meant losing your mate, and the gravity of the situation all comes crashing down at once. Neji looks as though he is feeling much the same.

“Give me them,” he orders, arms out.

“Her,” Naruto corrects. “The mednin said she’s a female alpha.”

Tears start welling up in Neji’s eyes as he takes her. Their bio pup was a female alpha, too.

“Thank you,” he whispers to no one, holding his new pup as tightly as he dared. “I’ve got you now, you’re safe and sound with me, I won’t let anything hurt you ever again.”

Naruto slips out of the house without a fuss, dropping the mednin’s recommendations for feeding the underweight pup on the coffee table.

...

You and Neji take your new pup upstairs and bundle her back into the nest. Neji lays down with her, stroking her cheek as he watches her sleep.

“You need to get some rest too, omega,” you suggest, running a hand down Neji’s back.

“Guard?” he asks in response.

“Yes," you smile at his protective instincts. "I’ll guard the nest while you sleep, I promise.”

“Okay, alpha…” Neji settles down, still with one hand resting on the pup. “But if I don’t wake up when she cries, wake me… I want to be the one to feed her.”

You laugh gently, “Of course, now get some sleep. I’ll guard you both.”

[lucimorningstar812]

ALTR 122139 Emotional Tracking

The following is a transcript of the first interview when staff at the IRIS facility housing ALTR 122139 tried to use the WTCHR system to track their fluctuations and try to understand them better

Those changes have been included in the transcript at the time they were detected

This is Dr ███████. The date is ████████ ██ 20██, the current time is ████ and I'm interviewing ALTR 122139 as part of a trial to understand how their instability works. This session involves the latest WTCHR model with a direct feed of identified emotional changes sent to my phone. Documented changes will be included in the transcript for archiving purposes. Now, good afternoon, Subject Morningstar

-

[Subject is shocked]

You used my name? Well, my IRIS name I guess

-

Of course. I've never been a fan of referring to intelligent ALTRs by their numerical code. It's dehumanising and very upsetting for many of the ALTRs we have here. I also see that the camera is working at least. I could see the moment I used your name, your status changed to shocked. We can proceed with the interview

-

[Subject became flattered after 'intelligent' was mentioned]

[Subject became paranoid after 'camera' was mentioned, and agitated once the conversation returned to them]

IRIS technology truly is fascinating when not being used to ████ ██████

-

Morningstar, must we bring this up now?

-

[Subject is annoyed]

No no, I get it. It's for the greater good or whatever bullshit you spew

-

I'm not trying to hurt you. No one in this facility should be trying to hurt you. You're considered safe and we don't want to risk ruining that

-

[Subject is disappointed]

I see. You don't actually care about me, just whether harming me would be beneficial or not. You've ██████ ████ ██ so many people in this building, all because you decided it was worth the risk to discover something

-

We're getting away from the purpose of this interview. We want to help you, understand how your emotional state shifts so rapidly and any potential triggers that cause those switches. You're a great help to the facility, and we just want to understand you, ok?

-

[Subject is dejected, no response provided]

-

Tell me about yesterday. What did you do? How did you feel? Did you communicate with anyone? Record any files?

-

[Subject is neutral] I mean, what else can I do here? It's a lonely, isolated life, and the food is pretty awful too.

[Subject is amused]

Though I did add a bunch of typos to random files to see how long it would take someone to notice. Last time I checked, only 3 had been returned to normal

[Subject is confused]

Surely you have a system tracking logins and changes made. How come it took 5 months to for you guys to figure out that time I changed every capital I in one profile with a lowercase L?

[Subject is intrigued and curious]

I also saw what you guys added to Anti's profile. I can't believe ███ ████ ██████ ███ ███ ██████ ███ ███ ███ ████ ██ ████ ██████

-

Please refrain from talking about that situation or 114209 in general, especially using a name. That is one entity that I refuse to treat with basic decency, given how much tragedy and mayhem is left in his path

-

[Subject became distressed when 'tragedy' was mentioned]

Why didn't you stop him?! Why don't you ever stop him?!

[System overload]

[Subject is angry, curious, impatient, distraught, happy]

Why won't you help him? Why can't I help him?

[Error Occured]

-

Morningstar, please calm down. I need you to breathe. Everything is ok

-

[Subject is ██████]

Audio after this point is corrupted with occasional heavy breathing. The interview was cut short while Dr ███████ was escorted to the medical ward by armed guards and had their vitals checked. As reported previously, Dr ███████ described a numb, emotionless feeling and a wave of tiredness. Vitals were normal and Dr ███████ has since undergone a standard 2-week counselling session to ensure their numbness was dealt with appropriately

[lunerabo]

To shorten: become valuable. In this hypothetical situation you have humans to worry about more than zombies, as zombies would operate without the mental restraints put in place to keep the body from accidentally killing itself with its own strength, thus making one able to do a lot of damage in a short amount of time, but destroy itself very quickly (a lot like rabies) whereas humans are extremely clever and 9/10 times find ways to have their cake and eat it too.

So, in the interest of not being murdered by a desperate thief who wants your pound of dog meat so they can feed themselves for the next week, you need to establish trade. Money is now worthless, but skills are not.

Become proficient in hunting before the actual apocalypse; chances are, it won’t happen all at once. You would see something like this beginning to bubble up long before shit hits the fan. Depending on whether or not the virus spreads to animals, this could be a very difficult path to choose, but a necessary one nonetheless. You’ll need basic medical/veterinary equipment as well if it does, because if you kill an animal, you need to be able to test for the virus to avoid giving someone bad meat. Not to mention, hunts can be very dangerous already even without a zombie virus on the loose, so you need to be prepared for injury. Meat will be scarce since this isn’t a job anybody will want to do, so there will be no reason to kill you and every reason to establish trade with you.

If you’re no good at hunting, make sure you’re good at building. Whether you create weapons, shelters, or transportation, everybody will be looking for someone who can do the heavy lifting like that. If you can supply that, you’ll get no shortage of people giving you resources in exchange for your skills. People, being people, will inevitably divide and begin warring amongst themselves, but if you remain extremely independent and help anybody who offers you enough payment without ever actually taking sides, you’re not likely to be harmed because they can’t afford to lose someone with your skills. Thus, you can profit off of everybody, maybe even hire personal protection against thieves.

You can also make things like soap and lip balm from natural resources and it isn’t at all hard to do, but no one seems to know how to do it for some reason. It never gets mentioned in media, but things like these are the small luxuries we would notice missing right away. In a situation like this where people are without, you pull a chapstick out of your pocket, everybody and their mother is going to want to get their hands on it.

Since cities are where the zombies will be, everyone will be fleeing to the countryside to get a small patch of dirt for themselves that the zombies are too far away to visit. However, very few people will choose land that’s difficult to get around in, which is why you should. Start hiking and rock climbing, so that you’re already well practiced in navigating treacherous terrain without injuring yourself, and build your house there. You’ll get fewer thieves since the path to your home is too risky, and should any zombies actually wander out that far, scrambling up sharp cliffs and steep mountainsides is a job that requires the attention to detail and carefulness of a human mind. You should still, however, set traps just to be safe. Well placed game traps and homemade land mines should get anything that manages to get through, and have some kind of alarm system for thieves that are smart enough to avoid all of it.

Point is, zombies are ironically the least of your problems in a zombie apocalypse scenario. Worry about people.

The way you can tell I’m a man is that if you have an hour to kill you can ask me about my zombie apocalypse survival plan that I’ve been carefully putting together and revising since I was 8

[robininthelabyrinth]

I'd like to see more of the Jiang Cheng has spider venom fic. Mostly because I want to see him bite someone else. How about a Jin?

Normal For the Spider - Extra: 5 People Jiang Cheng Bit, Some of Whom Deserved It

ao3

1 – Wei Wuxian

“So I’ve been exchanging letters with shijie on account of the whole theoretically banished business,” Wei Wuxian said as they strolled down the Qiongqi Path together, Wen Ning behind them making shy stuttering friends with the handful of Jiang sect disciples Jiang Cheng had brought along with him – he’d deliberately picked the friendliest and most social of the lot, the ones that acted like overgrown puppies and wanted to adopt everyone they met, and sure enough they’d mobbed Wen Ning like a bunch of crows intent on raising the poor little sparrow they found into a proper bird. It was no more than Wen Ning deserved, in Jiang Cheng’s opinion. Someone needed to socialize him, and clearly neither his sister nor Wei Wuxian were doing crap about it.

“That’s nice,” Jiang Cheng said. “If by nice you mean extremely suspicious. What about in particular?”

“Your family inheritance.”

“Is this about the summer house we have near that mountain lake? I told you, it’s been deserted for years and may possibly be haunted by something resistant to the usual liberation techniques, but if you really want to go there, you’re of course allowed…”

“That’s not the inheritance I meant and you know it.”

Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes. He did know it. “What questions do you have now?” he asked. “More medical stuff from Wen Qing?”

She’d recovered from the venom very well and immediately started wanting to know everything. Recovered a little too well, in Jiang Cheng’s opinion.

“No, this one’s for me,” Wei Wuxian said. “We’re going to Lanling City in order to let Jin Ling bite me as a way to establish familial ties and let him ‘absorb’ good aspects from my personality, right?”

Jiang Cheng nodded.

“So in some cases, biting is an act of affection?”

Jiang Cheng nodded, a little more warily.

“Then how come you’ve never bitten me?”

“It’s only affectionate when you’re a baby,” Jiang Cheng said. “Once you grow into your childhood venom, it starts being dangerous, even to family; you don’t do affection-bites after that point. And when you’re an adult…well, you saw Wen Qing!”

“Eh, she’s fine now,” Wei Wuxian said cheerfully. “I feel like I missed out! It’s not fair, Jiang Cheng. I deserve a bite! I’m practically your brother! We share essential bodily organs!”

“Wei Wuxian! Don’t talk about that!”

“Bite me and I’ll stop.”

“I’m not biting you just to make you stop being annoying –”

2 – Jin Zixun

“What are you doing here?!” Jiang Cheng demanded. “This is an ambush! Is the Jin sect considering waging an act of war against the Jiang sect?”

Jin Zixun scowled at him. “Not against the Jiang sect,” he said haughtily. “Against the Yiling Patriarch.”

“He’s my head disciple!”

That got a confused sort of frown. “But you banished him…?”

“Rumor,” Jiang Cheng said, with dignity, the way they’d always planned. “Baseless rumor, that’s all.”

Rumor he’d never denied, and had instead implicitly encouraged so that people would leave his Jiang sect alone for a little while as he gathered up strength and resources to tell them to fuck off.

“But…” Jin Zixun hesitated. “You just – attacked him?”

Jiang Cheng glared at Wei Wuxian, still lying prone on the ground with his head in Wen Ning’s lap to elevate it and his neck bandaged but still a little red – surely the paralytic had worn off by now?

Wei Wuxian noticed him staring and gave a jaunty little wave, grinning and very clearly regretting nothing, which meant that the paralytic had worn off and he was just lying there to be comfortable while watching the fun.

Typical.

“A friendly exchange,” he said, trying to maintain his dignity. “Also? Not the Jin sect’s business. What about you? What did you want with him?”

“I want him to remove the curse he cast on me,” Jin Zixun said, and he strode forward before Jiang Cheng could stop him and kicked Wei Wuxian in the side. “You hear me, you bastard?! I want the damn thing gone this instant or else –”

3 – Wen Ning

“So this is going to be a little awkward to explain,” Jin Zixuan said, rubbing his face. He looked tired, but that was possibly a side-effect of having Jin Zixun as a cousin. “Tell me, why are my cousin’s flunkies – er, I mean, my cousin’s friends convinced that it was Wen Ning that poisoned him?”

Jiang Cheng scowled.

“No offense meant,” Jin Zixuan added, nodding politely to Wen Ning. “It’s just, you know, you’re very much not a Yu, or even a Jiang.”

“No offense taken,” Wen Ning mumbled, though to Jiang Cheng’s eyes he looked a little pleased, even if his stiff wooden face still didn’t do emotions all that well. “It’s nice not to be automatically feared.”

“It’s because Wen Ning punched Jin Zixun in the face at the same moment that I bit him,” Jiang Cheng interjected, because someone needed to answer the actual question. “And then Jin Zixun fell over and someone started shouting about corpse poison – even though he’s obviously turned purple! Purple venom, purple spider, purple lightning…what part of this thematic color scheme is not obvious?!”

“Technically, the livor mortis spots generated by corpse poison are also purple,” Wei Wuxian said, completely unhelpfully. “According to Wen Qing, it’s the lack of oxygen in the blood pooling under the skin or something, which is the same thing your mom’s poison does.”

“Do you think you’re helping?” Jiang Cheng demanded.

“No, not at all. Did I sound like I was helping? I didn’t mean to.”

“I’m going to bite you again, you little…”

“My father isn’t going to want to let Wen Ning through the door if he’s considered a possible threat,” Jin Zixuan said, wisely deciding to carry on with the conversation despite their bickering. “You know he’s been saying all those things about how dangerous the Yiling Patriarch is – this’ll just feed into that.”

“I’m not going to Lanling City without Wen Ning!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed. “Wen Qing made me promise! It’s his first time visiting such a big place, too!”

“I’m pretty sure Wen Qing made you promise not to leave him behind because she was worried about your well-being, not Wen Ning’s ability to be a tourist,” Jiang Cheng said.

“Doesn’t matter! I’m not leaving him, and I’m definitely not going to not attend the party, so you have to fix this!”

“I don’t know how to fix this –”

Wen Ning coughed lightly. “Uh,” he said. “Jin-gongzi��would your father let me in if I wasn’t a threat? Say, if I was unconscious?”

A moment of silence.

“…does venom work even on fierce corpses?”

“Of course it does,” Jiang Cheng said irritably. “It wouldn’t be much of a defense mechanism for a cultivator if it didn’t.”

4 – Jin Guangshan

“I didn’t mean to!” Jiang Cheng said, his hands over his mouth. “I really didn’t mean to! It’s Wei Wuxian’s fault!”

“How is this my fault?!” Wei Wuxian asked. He looked amused, which was never a good sign, and even less so given the extreme crisis of the situation. “I wasn’t even in the room.”

“You encouraged me to keep biting people as a solution to everything!” Jiang Cheng hissed. “It got me in the mood. I wasn’t thinking!”

He looked down at the unconscious (and swiftly purpling) Jin Guangshan and grimaced. There was no convenient Wen Ning to put the blame on this time: it had been just the two of them, Jin Guangshan and Jiang Cheng, alone in a room together. Jin Guangshan had wanted to have words with him, sect leader to sect leader, which mostly meant that he wanted to throw his weight and seniority around to try to brow-beat Jiang Cheng into doing what he wanted, except that wasn’t going to work because Jiang Cheng was prepared, okay, he’d worked so long and so hard to try to build up the Jiang sect until it could resist Jin sect pressure.

And he’d probably just ruined everything.

“He has legitimate grounds to declare war against us now,” Jiang Cheng said miserably. “Or maybe to demand that we hand over that stupid Tiger Seal he keeps bugging you about as reparations, or in order to keep him from declaring war…”

“We can’t let him have it,” Wei Wuxian said at once. “It’s far too dangerous. I’d destroy it, first.”

“But then he’d still have a reason to strike against us…”

There was the soft sound of someone clearing their throat, and at first Jiang Cheng thought it was Wen Ning but when he looked up it was Jin Guangyao, instead. He looked the same as always, gentle and personable and smiling, which struck Jiang Cheng as being unaccountably weird for some reason that he couldn’t figure out until he remembered that the man’s father was currently lying on the ground being poisoned and maybe Jin Guangyao shouldn’t be smiling so much.

“If you don’t mind,” Jin Guangyao said, “I might have a suggestion that would get rid of that problem…”

5 – Wen Qing

“…and long story short, Jin Guangyao is going to run Lanling Jin until Jin Zixuan is done having kids, which may be never based on the soppy looks he and my shijie keep exchanging, and we all have the Jin sect’s blessing to move back into the Lotus Pier,” Wei Wuxian concluded. “All’s well that ends well, right, Jiang Cheng?”

Jiang Cheng crossed his arms and glared, admitting nothing.

“I’ll be happy to move anywhere that has decent food,” Wen Qing remarked. “This damn place won’t even grow radishes properly, and it’s Yiling; the radishes should be practically growing themselves.”

“I’ve arranged for some farmland for your people,” Jiang Cheng said, because practicalities he could do. “There’s still lots left over from before the war, lying fallow, and some of the places are medicinal herb fields – we need people with cultivation to tend to those, so I figured that might work for you. You’d have half regular farmland, to make sure you can grow whatever food you feel you need to be comfortable, and the other half, the herbs, can be sold to the Jiang sect at profit.”

“That sounds good,” Wen Qing said.

“Especially since they’re medicinal herb plants,” Wei Wuxian chimed in. “You could stock up on medicines you need!”

“A lot of medicines have to be obtained through trade, you utter nincompoop! I can’t make medicine just using what a single medicinal herb field will generate!”

Jiang Cheng nodded approvingly, thinking to himself that at least there was someone else in the world who understood exactly how aggravating it was to have to deal with Wei Wuxian’s unbridled and illogical optimism on a regular basis.

“And as for you,” Wen Qing said, turning to Jiang Cheng, who blinked owlishly at her. “Don’t think I missed the part of that story about how biting people is a sign of affection!”

“It’s – what?! No, you don’t – that’s when we’re children– it’s –”

Wei Wuxian started cackling.

[peachycoreroo]

Umm, I got a request! What about their s/o being sick and how they would take care of them? If you feel comfortable with that, you can a spice it up a bit with cockwarming 👀 I'd love to see Sugawara, Kuroo, Satori, Oikawa and Bokuto!

characters: sugawara koushi, kuroo tetsurou, tendou satori, oikawa tooru, bokuto koutaro

genre: fluff, smut, comfort(??)

word count: 1.6k

warnings: fem!reader, it's mostly fluff, cockwarming, hinting at oral fem! receiving, mentions of medication, established relationships

authors note: uhh it got kind of repetetive with the cockwarming so i threw oral in there, but i hope you'll still like it!! if you see kuroo’s being the longest, no you don’t<3 here's a link to my masterlist

sugawara koushi:

sugawara koushi was a good husband in many ways. he was attentive, loving and a great cook, alas a bit aggressively positive whenever you felt insecure or stressed. nothing you couldn’t handle. but as you laid in your shared bed with a cold, you once again were reminded of why you loved him so much.

“so, chicken soup or potato soup?”, suga asked again, after you didn’t respond the first time, being too immersed in your thoughts about him. coughing, you tried to sit up, just to get pushed down again.

“no. no getting up. you stay here, i do everything.” looking up at your silver-haired husband, you smiled softly and finally replied: “chicken, please.”

with a nod, you were once again left alone, just like before sugawara came home from work. ten minutes later, he returned with a steaming bowl and a spoon, sitting down beside you. refusing to make you do anything at all, he insisted on feeding you himself.

“thank you so much, kou’. you make the best chicken soup”, you lovingly whispered as he fed you, making him smile at the compliment you always gave when he cooked it.

after the meal, you reached out towards the elementary school teacher, murmuring: “’wanna be close to you.”

knowing exactly what you wanted, he lied down behind you before taking out his cock and stroking it a few times. as he pushed your panties to the side and slipped inside your tight walls, you felt like you could finally completely relax.

you felt safe in his arms, as he pressed soft kisses along your shoulder, knowing you always had a husband who was willing to take care of your every need.

kuroo tetsurou:

being the girlfriend of kuroo tetsurou, employee at japan volleyball association, was hard at times. a lot of nights and weekends were spent alone, as your boyfriend had to stay overtime at the office on many nights, and, occasionally, even come in on saturdays and sundays.

that didn’t make you love him any less, but it did make for some hard times. for example, right now. it was already 11p.m. and your boyfriend was still nowhere to be seen, while you struggled with a fever the whole day.

having enough of not being able to do anything yourself, you staggered into the kitchen, determined to make some tea. as the kettle heated up, you leaned against the kitchen island, too focused on trying to stand upright to hear the front door opening.

kuroo was tired, but when he heard the kettle boil, indicating that you were still awake, it was like all the pressure from work suddenly lifted off of him. but when he entered the kitchen, excited to finally come home to you, he was only faced with worry at the sight of you, looking like you’re ready to collapse at any moment.

the black-haired man didn’t hesitate to pick you up bridal style, almost giving you a heart attack in the process. “tetsu’! oh my god, you scared me!”, you croakily exclaimed, voice rough from your throat aching.

“m’ sorry baby. you should’ve told me you were sick, ‘would’ve come home earlier”, he scolded, already knowing you didn’t want to bother him at work, no matter how bad you were feeling.

kuroo carried you into the bedroom, placing you on the bed before loosening his tie and putting a large hand on your forehead, checking your temperature.

“i didn’t want you to worry”, you whispered, your fever-consumed brain zeroing in on tetsurou’s exposed collarbones and dress shirt-clad arms. “well, mission failed, because now i definitely am”, he murmured, already leaving the room to continue making the tea you started.

grabbing his hand at the last second, you looked up at him, gaze glazed over with exhaustion. “can we just cuddle, tetsu’? i just want to cockwarm you. ‘wanna feel you after such a long day.”

how could he ever deny you asking so nicely? kissing your forehead, the tall man sighed. 

“anything you want, kitten.”

tendou satori:

tendou knew something was wrong as soon as he woke up. you were restless beside him, sweating and groaning in your sleep, as if a nightmare were haunting you. as he reached out to wake you up, he immediately felt how hot your body temperature was.

with determination to take care of you, the red-haired male fetched some medicine, before finally waking you up. “y/n, sweetie. you’re running a fever, wake up.”

groaning, you turned away from him, not wanting to face the headache that was currently pounding in your head. you could feel your boyfriends’ fingertips gently caressing your arm, as he leaned in and murmured: “if you take your medicine, i’ll let you sit on my lap and sleep all day, sweetheart”, knowing exactly how to get you to take the medication.

you can’t remember when it became a thing in your relationship, but whenever you felt sick, stressed, or just had a bad day, you’d always sit on your boyfriends’ lap, stuffed full of his cock, while you peacefully napped.

groggily opening one eye to look at him, he knew he had you when you slowly sat up and reached out for the medicine he was holding. when the tall man was sure you swallowed, he sat down, leaning against the headboard, and pulled you onto his lap.

it was almost therapeutic for you, as you slowly sunk down on his cock, both of you sighing contently, before burying your face in his neck, ready to lose yourself to sleep once again.

with tendou’s cock inside you, and his large hand stroking your hair, you slowly drifted off.

oikawa tooru:

“tooru, relax. it’s just a cold”, you tried to calm down your boyfriend, currently pacing inside your shared bedroom like a mad man.

“how can i relax when you’re sick! what am i supposed to do? oh my god, what if it gets worse?”

as much as you loved oikawa tooru with all your heart, his flare for the dramatic really didn’t help you in your sick state. this was the first time you caught a nasty virus since moving in with him and it clearly showed that he was the younger sibling in his family, never having to take care of someone, but always being cared for.

you sighed, massaging your temples: “oikawa tooru, you’re going to give me a headache. i just need some tea and sleep. i’m not going to die.”

“are you sure?”, he looked at you, worried. “it sounds like you want me to”, you deadpanned, making your boyfriends dramatic ass crack a smile.

“no, i definitely don’t, y/n. don’t worry. mission ‘tea for my sick girlfriend’: in action.” and with that, he disappeared into the kitchen, finally giving you space to take a deep breath. it’s not as if he annoyed you by any means, you knew he was just worried about you.

when the brunet reappeared with a steaming cup of tea, you had an idea as to how to calm him down.

“babe, lay down.” oikawa gave you a quick, puzzled look, before doing as he was told, not quite understanding where you were going with this. as you turned your backside to him and fondled for his cock, he quickly stopped you. “wait! wait, what are you doing?”

“if you want to help me, just slip inside and let me sleep.”

the setter looked at you, as if you grew two heads, only getting out a ‘huh?’ at your statement. rolling your eyes, you guided him inside you and cuddled up with your back against his chest, explaining: “it just makes me feel safe. i know you’re not leaving me to suffer alone.”

oikawa didn’t know that he could feel this soft while he had his dick inside someone, but there’s a first for everything.

bokuto koutaro:

“’taro, i know you mean it in the best way possible, but you know i won’t be able to eat that.”

bokuto koutaro was a great husband. you could even say the best, but that might be your bias talking. unfortunately, he couldn’t cook if his life depended on it, and as much as you appreciated his efforts of wanting to take care of you while you felt under the weather, your will to live a little longer was stronger.

pouting, the spiker looked at you with puppy dog eyes. “but baby, i want to make you feel better! how am i supposed to do that, when you don’t even let me cook for you”, your oversized husband whined.

“koutaro. baby. light of my life. the last time you wanted to surprise me by making dinner, you nearly burned down the whole house. how am i supposed to relax and get better, when i’m going to be worrying about you burning yourself to death?”, you asked gently, knowing how upset he can get when he feels useless.

already seeing bokuto’s face drop more and more with every word, you immediately followed with: “but i know how you can make me feel better without any dangerous kitchen activities involved.”

at that, he perked up. “really?”

slowly parting your legs, you looked at him expectingly. without having to say another word, the tall spiker was already between your legs, taking of your panties and licking a stripe up your slit.

when he heard your content sigh and felt you relax, he knew this was the best thing he could do for you.

[sugakuns]

[hc] tsukishima, iwaizumi, kenma & kageyama with a s/o who gets dizzy spells

very much relate

☀︎ tsukishima kei

this bitch will make fun of you

stand up too fast? “can you see yet?”

grab your head cause you feel lightheaded? “sir down dumbass”

but it’s all in the name of ✨love✨

honestly babes doesn’t show it but he’s kinda concerned bc,, he’s only ever had like a dizzy spell once and you seem to have them all the time

lowkey you start to notice every time you go to stand up he watches you

he literally caught you one time when your knees buckled and said nothing

like tsuki,, you just bolted from across the room

he’s probably said to you before about your health but in his own weird tsuki way

“maybe you should eat more vegetables, shrimp” or “have you even drank water today?”

babie would pass you his water bottle and not even look at you

tbh probably asked yamaguchi abt how to help you cuz he’s secretly a sweetheart 🥺

lmao he’ll definitely just grab your wrist and plop your butt on the floor, a chair or whatever is nearby

☀︎ iwaizumi hajime

straight up asks you why you’re like that lmao

like do you not get enough nutrients? hydration?

like you can’t just stand up too fast all the time

if you’re hanging out together and you go to stand up Iwa will grab your wrist or something and tell you to “watch yourself” cause sometimes you literally do just shoot up lmao

Iwa straight up tells you that if you won’t take care of yourself he will

like this boy is so hellbent on making sure he can help you

literally if you go to his house or you go out for food he’ll make sure you get something with a lot of nutrients and stuff

he’ll also force like 3 bottle of water down you throughout the day

“I can feed myself Iwa..”

“shhh” - Iwa, giving you his bento

If it’s because of a medical problem this bb will be so heartbroken 🥺

becomes your little butler when you’re feeling dizzy and will force you to lay down

☀︎ kenma kozume

kenma is a smart cookie so off the bat he’ll ask you if it’s medical

if it’s not then he gives u a -_- and “take better care of yourself idiot”

if it is,, babie will subtly take care of you

if you talk about wanting to go somewhere, baby’s watching you as soon as you get up

one time you scared tf out of him cause you literally swayed so much that you fell on your side

Kenma’s never dived that fast - even when playing volleyball

if he catches you drinking coffee or cafinated drinks he’ll confiscate them and shove his water bottle in your hands

“dummy, don’t you know that causes dizziness?”

if you stay up late baby will scold you lovingly

“go to bed baby, you’ll end up getting worse”

yes, the kenma who goes to bed early just to get up at 2am to play a game, tells you to fix your schedule

all he’s gotta do is give u his puppy eyes and you’re suddenly going to bed at 11pm instead of 3-5am

☀︎ kageyama tobio

clueless

literally

someone call Cher Horowitz cause kageyama is taking over

all he knows is that it can be from standing up too fast lmao

he literally told you “just..don’t stand up that fast then?”

🥺🥺🥺 babie

lowkey,, suga had to tell kageyama that it’s more tan standing up fast when he noticed how often you’d grab your head or sit down every time you stand up

the next day you came to school? kageyama packed you a lunch with lots of veggies and fruit

“suga-san told me so..here” shoves the bag in your hand with a..determined gaze

if you tell him it’s medical you’ve officially lost him

how can he help you? babe actually looks up stuff

bless him,, he barely remembers anything but it’s something

since kageyama plays a sport he always has a weird supply of water on him

like his school bag is full of water and milk

don’t ask how he gets anything else in there lol

if you two are in the same class he’ll stare at you the whole time you take a drink of water

it’s kinda menacing lol

lowkey if u ever get a migraine from he will pass away bc he doesn’t know how to take care of himself lmao

[magicmetslogic]

Oh man, this is gonna be a long post, Sara. I hope you're ready!

First off is the Dadven au, which I have talked about on discord many times.

You’ve met with quite an unfortunate fate, haven’t you?  … Did your house burn down? Family eaten by monsters?  So what?  You think that kind of story is rare? Even if you’re talking about the great war, pretty much everyone lost something important to monsters.  So what’s your deal? Telling me to kill you…  ------------------ It had been two weeks since Don Whitehorse asked those things of him. Two weeks since he had given him the name Raven. Two weeks since he’d told him to work for him in order to pay off the medical treatment required after the Don gave him his initial beatdown. And two weeks of almost complete silence in the small flat he’d been assigned to live in, located inside of Union HQ. If it weren’t for the fact that it was the Don, he’d think it was so that they could keep an eye on him. As it was, however…

“Do something about that face that’s making you look like the most unfortunate guy in the world.”

…The past two weeks, ‘Raven’ had kept mostly to himself. He wandered around the building some, and met with the Don once or twice, and walked around Dahngrest a little bit, though people largely avoided him. That was fine with him. It wasn’t like he was expecting to make any genuine connections anyway. No…honestly, he’d been expecting for the Don to have come back the day after they had met and tell him that he’d changed his mind, actually, time to die, can’t just have a mole walking around putting us all in danger. Or something like that. Might still happen. Or perhaps Alexei will…

Well. Regardless. Someone had been knocking at his door for the past few minutes, rather insistently, and it didn’t seem as if they were going to leave any time soon.

‘Raven’ groaned into his pillow, begged for the person at his door to leave him alone for a couple more minutes, then finally slogged himself out of bed, pushing aside the covers and shambling his way out of his bedroom. Only once he’d woken himself with a few quick stretches and massaged his left shoulder did he open the door. “What.”

The man, some generic Altosk guild member, glowered at him. “Get dressed. The Don needs you.”

Oh, great. 

Next up can be Out of Mind, since I don't think I've shared any of that fic with you yet.

Casey sighed to herself as she tended the small fire in front of her, feeding it small twig after small twig that materialized itself from the darkness around her. The only sounds were she and the crack of a somehow still-moist stick snapping as steam built up, expanded, then exploded out of the small piece of wood. It was incredible, she couldn’t help but think, just how closely the void imitated the small details of a campfire, despite the surrounding area being nothing more than dark, dark, and more dark. But maybe she could appreciate it a bit more if she actually knew how she wound up here. 

Just before gasping awake in the wherever-she-was, she died. She knew that much for a fact. 

And, she soon found, she wasn’t alone in that respect. From time to time, though time meant nothing here, a figure would step out of the darkness and walk up to her, sometimes blurry initially but quickly growing in clarity as she realized who she was talking to. People, from before she’d died. One or two family members, a few different friends, her captain before she moved on to have her own brigade, and then her very own subordinates. Samaras. Hietham. Gaiman. Many men and many more. And they all had one thing in common: They’d died. 

That fact, while easily lending itself to hysteria, eventually meant little to both herself and the people she met when they realized everything they could finally say to each other. That, and also having no concept of time or space makes it easy to sit down and really think about one’s life, something that would drive her crazy if she did it for too long if the concept of “too long” even existed for time in this space. 

Next...maybe the beginning of the epilogue chapter for Growing Pains.

May 5th, 10:42 am.  This was it. 

The final day. The final hour. 

Of all days of reckoning, this was one that Raven reckoned the most. The rest of his life would be dictated by this final event and this stack of folded papers he clutched from inside his pants pocket. He worried that his sweaty palms would make the ink smear but he needed to know that he hadn't lost the important documents. His fate...lay in his palms...

He thought all of this as he watched Estelle blow up the last of the polwiggle themed balloons and gently bounce it onto the floor where it landed and rustled against its various wiggle cousins, where confetti lay already strewn about and neighbored the various colored and monster printed streamers that hung from the tables, the chairs, the light fixtures, and the ceiling. Estelle truly had outdone herself this time, Raven thought. He hadn't known that was even possible until the day itself had arrived, considering her track record of spending the past month planning and arranging parties every two days of various make and themes that miraculously never overlapped and always surprised him when party supplies actually existed for such things. 

From Major Guild themed to the SuperStar troop to Cartography and Adventure themed to a comparatively much more tame Pirate theme, Estelle had thought of it all and made every single one work. It almost made him forget the torturous amounts of cake taste testing Yuri had been making him do for the past month. 

Almost. 

Ok, now what next...maybe the beginning of the second chapter for Schwann's Accidental Vacation.

Schwann slogged awake and instantly regretted it. 

What he first noticed is the piercing pain filling his skull. It radiated, starting from behind his eyes and radiating to his fingertips and mingling with nausea that swirled in his stomach. 

What he next noticed is the freezing air that sent a wave of shivers rack at his body, instinctively forcing his aching exhausted body to curl up in an attempt to conserve body heat despite the sweat dampening his forehead and leaving a cloying mess on his skin. 

And finally, he realized he’s lying down on what feels to be a soft surface. Or rather, a hard surface covered by far too little cushion, he noted, joints uncomfortably bruising against whatever it was where it pressed into the stony surface. 

He much preferred it when he was unconscious.

Ok, now...maybe the beginning of the second chapter for Simple and Sweet?

“And after that, I-I couldn’t even sleep! I spent the entire night sitting next to her-” another blush flooded Estelle’s face pink as she remembered how much she stared at Rita’s face, far too pretty in the moonlight. Raven didn’t need to know that part. “-until it was morning and I remembered it was my turn to make breakfast. That- that sounds like love, right?” 

Raven blinked, catching himself mid-gape, closed his mouth before a fly could wander in, and raised an eyebrow. “Princess, yer askin’ me if that sounds like love?” 

Estelle frowned, uncertain. “Y-yes?” 

“Estelle, if that ain’t love I’m a flyin’ rappig on a unicycle!” 

Despite her embarrassment, uncertainty, and confusion, she couldn’t stop herself from giggling. “I- I guess, hehehe, I guess that is pretty convincing,” she managed to say, her eyes squinting past her laughter and completely failing to hide her giggles behind what should be a lady-like raised hand but only managing to lift it half curled as her flushed face fell behind her pink hair and hunched shoulders, “since you are decidedly not a rappig on a unicycle.” 

Raven snorted. “Well, I’m glad ya noticed!”

I'm trying to decide on if I'll keep it this way since I'm not sure it's funny enough but who knows ^^

Now...perhaps the GP sequel fic openings? They are both sick fics, so they're probably up your alley.

The first one is currently titled "It's getting hot in here!" and in it Raven gets pneumonia ^^"

Raven admired the glittering waves that tossed the sea and hummed a little ditty that Patty had taught Karol and he.

“Now we are ready to head for the horn...Weigh hey, Roll and go…” 

There wasn’t much to watch around him, he could see...Still, he won’t forget this journey east-south of Hypionia free. 

“Our boots and our clothes....Boys, are all in the pawn to me...” 

Having finished the promised adventure pirate, they were, so now North did they sail with their plunder. 

“Rollickin', Randy Dandy-O...” 

Raven smirked to himself. Ok, maybe he was enjoying this a bit too much, but Patty’s enthusiasm to find the long lost treasure of Captain Red Rolly, menace of the high seas, was contagious! Even now she was digging through the small wood chest they’d found with glee. “Heh, so I’m guessin’ that what they say about pirates and treasure ain’t an exaggeration?” 

Patty looked up from the treasure and nodded, “Aye! Though I really oughta thank you boys.” She said with a wink and a smile. “I wouldn’t have gone on this trip if you two hadn’t wanted to go sailing!” 

Kinda a stupid opening but I think it's fitting of Raven, ahaha ^^

Next gp sequel fic is the Karol sick fic, and it's called "Don't sweat it!"

It was dusk when the group finally entered Dahngrest, and Karol was vaguely aware of Yuri, Judith, nad Raven engaging in conversation as they followed the cobblestone pathways home. Dahngrest was just starting to come alive with its usual nighttime activity and while in some ways that aspect was similar to Zaphias, it was in many ways different and the familiarity of it was something that Karol had found himself missing during their time away. 

It had been a few weeks since Karol’s thirteenth birthday and subsequent adoption by Raven, with the bulk of that time having been spent in Zaphias meeting with Flynn and Estelle regarding a job that would span the next few months on and off. The job itself was intended to be mainly diplomatic in nature, with Brave Vesperia combining their efforts with those of Flynn’s as well as Rita and Estelle’s to assist the whole of Terca Lumireis to adjusting to life without blastia. Not everyone understood why the blastia had to be made obsolete and a portion of those individuals were rather vocal about their displeasure at the shift the world had taken without their consent. 

But just as that was something that had to be done, so was this… 

The more they walked, the harder it became for Karol to focus on his own thoughts, something he had noticed earlier, when Ba’ul was landing. Perhaps the trip had taken more out of him than he had originally thought…? After all, it had been the first trip they had taken since the Weasand of Cados...

“Terca Lumireis to Boss.” Yuri’s voice startled Karol out of his reverie and the boy turned to see Yuri standing much closer than anticipated. The young man looked the boy up and down and then raised an eyebrow. The way he said, “You didn’t hear what I said, did you,” was more of an observation than a question. 

Karol shook his head, still a little out of it as he mumbled a quick. “N-no, sorry.” 

Yuri sighed and patted the kid on the shoulder. “I was asking if you were excited for tonight? It is your first night at your dad’s.”

So yeah, exciting stuff ^^

And then...ah, yeah, there is ANOTHER GP sequel fic set a couple of days after the end of GP Ch 19 and I have it titled..."Steamed Ham" of all things? Ahahaha ^^

Two days had passed since Raven had returned to Nordopolica after his solo journey to the Weasand and in that time, Estelle had decided that the best thing for the boys’ recovery was to ship them off to Yumanju for a handful of days.

Rita had agreed, stating the remote location and peaceful atmosphere would do the three of them some good. And, as luck would have it, the very morning after Estelle had decided this would be their course of action, Flynn and Patty had arrived in Nordopolica as well. Those two had only been briefly filled in on the events of the Weasand when it became apparent that Flynn was also in dire need of a vacation. And thus, Estelle ordered the young Commandant to join Yuri, Karol, and Raven, ignoring Flynn’s attempts to argue that he was fine and if she had simply caught him after a rough night’s sleep. 

And that’s how the four of them came to find themselves aboard the Fiertia, the journey being personally overseen by Judith to ensure the boys arrived at Yumanju without incident. Raven and Karol had, unsurprisingly, passed out on the bottommost cot shortly into their flight, leaving Yuri and Flynn to their own devices. 

Several hours had passed since then, with approximately ten minutes remaining until they would land outside their destination. So, Yuri decided to check-in on a still-sulking Flynn. 

“If I didn’t know any better, Flynn, I’d say you looked like you’d been sentenced to a weekend in a prison cell rather than an onsen.” He teased with a playful elbow to the ribs as an added attempt to get the blonde’s attention. 

Flynn grunted and shot Yuri a dour look. "You don't know the council. For all intents and purposes, they may as well be equivalent." 

“Sooo what you’re saying is I should show the council what the inside of a prison cell looks like?” 

This fic has some minor continuity errors with the epilogue in GP but I ain't gonna change it!

So...ah man, I think I have like 2-3 more fics to share. This post is getting really long...yeah, I think I'll stop this here ^^"

As for who I'll tag, maybe @serialparoxysm @seriously-siri @dazais-guardian-angel...yeah, maybe y'all three for now.

Anyway, thanks for the tag, Sara ^^

Tag Game: Ten First Lines

Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.

Thank you @birdmenmanga for the tag!

I'm currently working on two fics! One of them is a second chapter!! Like, I've never written multichapter fics! And the other one, I'm planning on it being a multichapter fic too! Oh my... It's a first! I'm so excited!!

1. Unlikely meetings, chapter 2 (Birdmen, radio station AU with Karasuma Eishi and Sagisawa Rei)

A hand was pointing in the direction of flowing colors, as if they were slowly getting sucked into the center of the wall. A black hole. "Eclipse" said the person next to Rei, but then they shook their head. They seemed upset.  The person took a paint brush and threaded carefully towards the canvas, avoiding the  paint rills across the floor. They tentatively stroke a few times with the brush, but then shook their head again. They frantically wiped the canvas with their sleeve.

"Wait, Rui!" cried Rei, his hand extended in front of him. He suddenly recognized his brother next to the canvas. Rui slowly turned to look behind him, showing a sheepish smile and his eyes brimming with tears. He was pleading for more time. His hair was a mess and his long-sleeved shirt was stained with paint.

Rei watched nervously as his brother was closing in to the singularity, fearing he'd soon get swallowed whole alongside the paint. This was usually how it went. But then, against all odds, a blinding light came from behind Rui. His brother turned towards Rei and seemed to hesitate before saying... Rei couldn't hear. He couldn't see his face either with all this light. It was like looking directly at the sun... "The Eclipse is done" whispered Rei.

2. Sapphic timeloops angst [no title yet] (Birdmen, no abilities / sci fi AU with Umino Tsubame, Fiona, Irene Griff)

Haven't started translating it yet, so here's an excerpt in French:

Tsubame sent des doigts effleurer sa joue. Elle fait mine de continuer à dormir, alors les doigts se dirigent vers ses cheveux pour jouer avec une mèche et l'utilisent pour lui chatouiller le front. Un sourire se dessine malgré elle sur ses lèvres. "Bon matin, Tsubame," dit une voix douce. Tsubame ouvre les yeux et son champ de vision est empli par une Fiona assise au bord du lit en face d'elle, un coude appuyé sur le matelas avec la main sous le menton. Ses boucles blondes tombaient le long de ses épaules. Tsubame résiste à l'envie de passer ses doigts dedans en voyant que Fiona était déjà coiffée de sa paire de papillons élastiques. Elle devait être réveillée depuis un moment. Tsubame continue de contempler son visage et lui prend la main qui lui joue dans les cheveux. Fiona rougit un brin et affiche un petit sourire gêné mais affectueux, une rareté qui était réservée uniquement à Tsubame et à Irène. Leurs doigts s'entremêlent et Tsubame les attire vers sa bouche pour les embrasser un à un. "Bon matin, Fiona," dit-elle entre deux baisers.

I'd like to tag @magicmetslogic @lackadaisical-pottymouth but anyone coming across this post, feel free to participate.

[lasquadrasfuckhouse]

hello I am back with a request if that’s ok with you q w q ) for la squadra with scenario-hc’s with their s/o taking care of them ( can go nsfw if you’d like but for now sfw thoughts ) as much as I love them taking care of their s/o I love when the roles are switched. Can be injured or other— but the goal is to make them feel safe and loved for as much as possible, like my other ask tender emotional moments are my jam. If find the muse for it 💖 if not that’s completely ok too. Pls & thnk u 🥰

ALWAYS OKAY W/ ME I LOVE SEEING U IN MY ASKBOX!!!! it's tendie hours 😍

taking care of la squadra 😌

risotto ✂️

it isn't easy to get risotto to relax, he's a workaholic. sit on him and give him a Look that you're not moving and neither is he, and he'll be so charmed that he'll relent.

he's also more used to taking care of people than being taken care of, so it's a bit of an adjustment to sit on his ass for a few days until he's recovered from the worst of whatever injury/illness he's got, but he finds himself getting like, quietly kind of emotional about it. he hasn't allowed himself to be cared for in a long time and he expresses that to you, and how much he appreciates and loves you.

he finds he really enjoys the opportunity to relax, cause yeah he's under the weather but at least he can chill for a bit. and he'd very much love to chill with you if you have the time. quiet cuddles or existing comfortably in the same space will have him feeling very cozy, loved, and rested. kiss him on the forehead to remind him that he is soft and precious and he'll want to snuggle you all day with a little smile on his face.

prosciutto 🚬

also not used to being taken care of. he'll be grumpy and try to micromanage the house from his bed at first (and you probably banished him to bed because he wasn't getting any rest on the couch). he relaxes when he wants to!!!! remind him that he needs time to recover and he's only human, and you promise the house won't fall apart without him. not only is he soft for you but he trusts you completely, so he relaxes.

he might be a bit restless, but set him up with a book and he'll be good. you may even take on prosciutto-like mannerisms in his place, like shushing the others if they're being too noisy. if he overhears you insisting on peace and quiet so he can rest, he'll smile to himself.

what really gets him and lets him know he's loved is taking over what he usually does while he rests, like folding his laundry and putting it away in the order he likes. and if you initiate the classic forehead touch with a smile and tell him to chill so he can get better, he'll gladly lay around all day thinking of you.

pesci 🎣

he tries to power through it but no honey you need to rest. give him puppy eyes and say you really want him to relax and get better, and he'll do it for you. he will get SO better for his babe just u see!!!!

he's also kind of glad for the chance to have downtime tho, even tho he's typically eager to help and stuff. he just wishes he didn't feel like ass. cheer him up with lots of cuddles and quiet relaxing things u can do together and he'll feel loads better!!!

he may feel kind of bad at first like oh no he doesn't want to bother u. but reassure him that he is never a bother, u love him and love being with him and that doesn't change when he's under the weather. he will accept that and thank u wholeheartedly for taking care of him

formaggio 🧀

milks it for all its worth. OOOH BABE IM IN SO MUCH PAAAIN PLEASE HOLD MEEE 😩 if he's feeling like shit at least he's gonna get cuddles out of it

would love nothing more than to snuggle up and watch stupid movies with you all day. he may just cling to you if you try to get up and insists that someone else can fetch you both dinner/blankets/etc instead. you're his best medicine!!! his comfort!!!! do not seperate!!!!!

but he is a sucker for a home cooked meal. even if you go for a bit, if you come back with something u made urself, even if it's not the most amazing display of chef skills, he'll be falling all over himself with how much he loves you because you put love and effort into something to make him feel better

illuso ✨

one of the WORST when he gets sick or injured because he just complains and lays on the pity party even more than formaggio. everything sucks!!! woe is illuso!!!! he needs ur healing kisses!!!!!

he definitely goes into the mirror world to rest b/c he needs peace and quiet or he'll get cranky. but he will bring u ofc. not just to be pampered either he's just cozy and happy in ur company

lavishing him in attention aside, what will REALLY tug on his heart is taking initiative to take care of him, like asking first how he's feeling, bringing an extra blanket cause you know he likes to have a pile of them, offering to very gently brush his hair. just like, little genuine attentive things. it may get him blushing

melone 🍈

very practical about it, there's that whole thing of 'people with medical backgrounds are the worst patients for one reason or another' but he doesn't try to take shortcuts with the rest he knows he needs and he's very polite and patient with asking for/instructing on what he needs

he's great at finding ways to entertain himself so no worries in that regard. if he's worried about getting you sick he may actually discourage cuddles for once in his life but otherwise he'd love to snuggle up to his babe all day

he'd honestly just feel really comforted if you told him all about your day and shared cool things with him or the classic 'i saw this and thought of you' he'll be 😍

ghiaccio ❄️

EXTRA grumpy when he's uncomfortable or in pain and unable to work his energy out. he's very active, so his body (or you) making him sit on his ass when he doesn't want to will leave him very prickly even though logically he knows it's for the best.

he'll generally want his space but then have bouts of feeling very cuddly. picture him cocooned in blankets with only the top half of his face visible and his general grumpy glower relaxes as u massage his scalp like calming an angry cat.

he'll be very thankful for everything you do, including kissing his cheeks or leaving him to chill with some water and a book or shushing the others if they're being too rowdy. but he'll be extra super thankful and soft if you bundle him up and go for a walk with him around the block just to stretch his legs and get some fresh air cause you know how much he hates sitting around.

sorbet and gelato 🔪🍦

if one of them is under the weather, the house gets a brief respite from their antics cause you and the other one are there to entertain them and curb their restlessness. if they're both sick/injured, good fucking luck because their boredom will feed off each other and it will be a nightmare.

sorbet likes to chill but he always needs new surroundings. he'll want to stay on the couch to at least observe the house's regular chaos but if you (and maybe gelato) see that he's not getting enough rest you will have to literally drag him into your bedroom because 1) he's not letting go of his entertainment that easily 2) it's fun to watch you struggle. he is devising every way to cause problems on purpose without moving around too much

gelato HATES sitting still so he is slowly going insane and he will let you know it. get him a big stack of movies, let him have free reign of the tv, play cards with him etc if you know what's good for the whole house because otherwise he won't stay in bed or he'll do shit like scream for help just to see you rush in and then grin and be like oh nvm babe im fine :)

you thought they were a handful together regularly? HAH. when they're sick or injured together they enable each other even more than usual. you are the only one capable of placating them, enjoy being squished between your two extremely cuddly boyfriends.

cuddles and kisses and loving attention always make them feel better, a surefire way to get them to actually rest is by snuggling them. but even if you do go for a bit, what brightens them up is hearing about all the new happenings on base or this cute dog you saw or if you bring them new snacks every day or try making something different for dinner. like, not just to placate them, but cause you know they're bored and uncomfortable and you want to cheer them up, that's what gets them. and then they'll pull you down and hold you for the rest of the night.