#doesn’t mean they actually speak Hebrew

[highlyillogicalandroid]

I love when shows with Jewish characters clearly aren’t written by Jewish people.

Jewish character: *mumbling a Hebrew prayer*

Coworker: I didn’t know you spoke Hebrew!

Y’all.

[leroibobo]

another mena language post - i wanted to talk about judeo-arabic and clarify a little bit about what "judeo-arabic" means

the basics, for those of you who don't know: arabic, being a language that was spread over a large part of the world and has since evolved into many different forms, has many different things that differentiate certain dialects. languages/dialects can be influenced by languages speakers' ancestors spoke before, by the social structure of where speakers live, by languages they come into contact with, and by gradual evolution in pronunciation. (many letters like evolving into ones that are easier to pronounce - this is why arabic has no "p" sound, it eventually evolved into "f" or "b". the same thing happened in germanic languages to some extent, which is why we say "father" in english and "vader" in german while in romance languages it's some variation of "padre" or "père".) many arabic dialects in particular possess different substratum (obvious, traceable influence from languages people spoke in before shifting to the new one).

arabic, being a language that was spread over a large part of the world and has since evolved into many different forms, has many different regional dialects which are different for the reasons i described in the above paragraph. even though there's modern standard arabic (which is the subject of its own post), people speak regional dialects in real life. on top of that, there's a variety of social influences on different types of arabic, such as whether someone's living in the city or in the country, whether someone's sedentary or a bedouin, and in some cases religion.

in the middle east, religion was historically:

not seen as a personal choice, but as something you're born into and a group you're a part of, kind of like ethnicity;

not generally something governments actively wanted everyone to share one of at the penalty of ostracization due to sticking to your group being the more livable way of life in the area, or later, the benefits of things like imposing extra taxes on people who weren't the "correct" religion/branch (this is far from being a "muslim thing" btw, it's been in the area for a while now, i mean look at the assyrians);

an influential factor in where you lived and who you were more likely to interact with because of those two things. (for example, it wasn't uncommon for most of the people living in one village in the countryside to share one religion/branch of a religion. if your village converted, you converted, too. if they didn't, you didn't, either.)

this means that the influence of religion in different types of arabic is due to people of different religions living in or coming from different places, and who people talked to most often.

for example, in bahrain, most sedentary shia bahrainis' ancestors have lived on the island for a very long time, while most sedentary sunni bahrainis' ancestors immigrated from other places in the gulf and iran in the 18th century. therefore, while they've all interacted and shared different aspects of their dialects including loanwords, there are two "types" of bahraini arabic considered distinctive to sunni and shia bahrainis respectively, regardless of how long ago their ancestors got there. despite the differences being marked by the religion of the speakers, they have nothing to do with religion or contact/lack thereof between bahraini sunni and shia, but with the factors affecting the different dialects i mentioned in the first paragraph which influenced either group.

a similar phenomenon to this in english is class differences in accent in england. nothing in received pronunciation is actually something only rich people can say or unintelligible to poor people, it developed by the class differences influencing where rich and poor english people lived and the different pronunciation/linguistic histories in those places, as well with different classes keeping more to themselves.

the influence of religion on arabic dialects isn't universal and nowhere near as intense as it is with aramaic. some places, especially more cosmopolitan or densely populated places, are less likely to have very noticeable differences or any differences at all. in addition, certain variations of a dialects that may've been influenced by religion in some way (as well as urban dialects) may be standardized through tv/movies/social media or through generally being seen as more "prestigious", making more people who wouldn't have spoken them otherwise more likely to pick it up. (this is why so many arabic speakers can understand egyptian arabic - cairo is like the hollywood of the arabic-speaking world.) this is the case with many if not most countries' official and regional languages/dialects nowadays.

this phenomenon is what "judeo-arabic" refers to generally. like many other jewish diaspora languages, the "jewish" aspect is that it was a specific thing jewish people did to different types of arabic, not that it was isolated, possessed a large enough amount of certain loanwords (though some varieties did have them), or is unintelligible to non-jews. people were generally aware of differences where they existed and navigated between them. (for example, baghdadi jews may've switched to the more prestigious muslim baghdadi dialect when in public.) if you know arabic, listen to this guy speak, you should be able to understand him just fine.

judeo-arabic also often used the hebrew alphabet and some may have been influenced by hebrew syntax and grammar in their spelling. you can also see the use of script for religious identification in persian and urdu using the arabic script, and in english using the latin alphabet. in general, influences of hebrew/aramaic on different types of judeo-arabic aren't consistent. you can read more about that here.

"judeo-arabic" isn't a universal that definitely happened in every arabic-speaking part of the world that had jews in it to the same degrees, but it did definitely exist. some examples:

after the siege of baghdad in 1258, where mongols killed all muslim baghdadis and spared baghdadis of other religions, bedouins from the south gradually resettled the city. this means that the "standard" sedentary dialect in the south is notably bedouin influenced, while dialects in the north are more notably influenced by eastern aramaic. christians and (when they lived there) jews in baghdad have dialects closer to what’s up north. within those, there's specific loans and quirks marking the differences between "christian" and "jewish".

yemenite jews faced some of the most persistent antisemitic persecution in the middle east, so yemeni jewish arabic was more of a city thing and often in the form of passwords/codewords to keep jews safe. jews were usually a lot safer and better-regarded in the countryside, so jewish yemeni arabic was much less of a thing there, and when it was, it was less "serious".

due to the long history of maghrebi immigration to palestine, there's attestation of maghrebi influences in arabic spoken by some palestinian jews with that origin. this was also a thing in cairo to some extent.

(i'd link sources, but most of them are in hebrew, i guess you'll have to trust me on this one??)

still, the phrase "judeo-arabic" is often used with the implication that it was one all encompassing thing (which it wasn't, as you can see), or that jews everywhere had it in some way. many jews who spoke some version of arabic special to their mostly-jewish locale may not have registered it as a specifically "jewish" version of arabic (though they did more often than not). the truth is that research about anything related to middle eastern and north african jews is often sloppy, nonexistent, and often motivated by the desire of the researcher to prove something about israel's colonization of palestine (on either "side" of the issue). this is not me being a centrist about the colonization of palestine, this is me stating that academia is often (even usually) influenced by factors that aren't getting the best and most accurate information about something. i don't think we're going to get anything really "objective" on arabic spoken by jews in that regard for a long while.

for comparison's sake: yiddish is considered a separate language from german due to 19th century yiddishists' efforts to "evolve" yiddish from dialect to language (yiddish-speaking jews were said to speak "corrupted german" historically; on that note sephardim were also said to speak "corrupted spanish"). this was at a time when ethnic nationalism was en vogue in europe and declaring a national language meant declaring your status as a sovereign nation (both metaphorically and literally). for yiddishists to assert that they were speaking a language and not a dialect that intrinsically tied them to germans was to reject the discrimination that they were facing. (besides, german/austrian/swiss jews weren't speaking yiddish (leaving it with the connotation of being the language of those icky ostjuden), yiddish-speaking jews had practically zero other ties to germany/austria/switzerland, and yiddish-speaking jews (let alone the yiddishists) were almost entirely east of germany/austria/switzerland, so it's not like they were pulling this out of their ass.)

whether a jewish person of arabic-speaking descent calls it "arabic", "judeo-arabic", or something like "moroccan"/"syrian"/etc depends on who you're talking to, where they're from (both diaspora origins and today), how old they are, and what they think about zionism. despite "judeo-arabic" being what it's called in academia, on the ground, there's no real strong consensus either way because the social circumstances arabic-speaking jews lived in didn't drive them to form a movement similar to yiddishists. (not because there was no discrimination, but because the political/social/linguistic circumstances were different.) the occupation since made the subject of middle eastern jews’ relation to the middle east a contentious topic considering the political and personal weight behind certain cultural identifiers. the term "judeo-arabic" is modern in comparison - whether it's a distinction dredged up by zionist academics to create separations that didn't really exist or a generally accurate term for a specific linguistic phenomenon is a decision i'll leave you to make.

[foldedchip]

Things in Lackadaisy that I haven’t seen anyone talk about (starting with fun facts and ending with more serious topics)

Rocky was an escape artist for a traveling circus when he was a teenager. This is why he was able to escape the train tracks at the beginning of the story.

Horatio likes to sing, but only when no one is around.

Freckle is the only character to have a middle name in his character bio (Allen). Do the other characters have middle names?

Nicodeme used to be (or possibly still is) a wrestler known as the “Cajun Gator”.

Rocky speaks at least some French; the Savoys speak a mix of English, Creole, and French; Mordecai speaks English, Hebrew, and some German; Nina speaks English and Irish Gaelic; Viktor speaks Slovak and English; Mrs. Bapka speaks Slovak and some English.

Serafine likes practical jokes. The only one we’ve seen her play is the “hatchetman” thing with Mordecai, where she told him to kill a man with a hatchet and he actually did it. Has she played other practical jokes on him?

Ivy’s classmates know that she’s friends with gangsters, because they ask if Rocky is one of her “gangster friends” when she sneaks him into their dorm building. Ivy seems to like the attention.

Nicodeme doesn’t know his exact birthday, and he and Serafine don’t know their exact relation to each other. They could be half-siblings or cousins, or maybe not related at all.

Rocky is very knowledgeable about myths and folklore, and he’s also very well read. Considering he didn’t finish his primary education, he must have either picked this up from his mother, the McMurrays, or he developed an interest later in his life.

Rocky has frightened elderly people before, though he got along well with Mrs. Bapka.

Ivy’s father, Reuben Pepper, wasn’t just friends with Atlas— he owned a train station and helped him smuggle alcohol into the city. He must not do business with the Lackadaisy anymore, either because of Atlas’s death or for another reason. He was business partners with Atlas, but not Mitzi.

The name of Mordecai’s late baby sister, Hannah, is the combination to the safe he writes about in “Posthaste”.

Rocky doesn’t drink due to “past experience”. Did he drink before and then quit, or he see someone else drink and decide never to do it?

Mordecai shows a lot of the signs of autism. He comes across as very cold and unemotional, even with his own family members and closest friend. He doesn’t seem to feel empathy for people he doesn’t care about (often, autistic people will either feel far more empathy than is considered appropriate, or not nearly enough of it to be considered appropriate.) He has difficulty with social relationships and interaction, whether it’s casual flirting, working with others, negotiating with his boss, or developing and maintaining personal friendships. He is physically sensitive and can barely tolerate physical touch, crowded environments, or getting dirty or wet. He is very particular about the way he eats and dresses, to the point where other people point it out. He has an intense and unusual interest in geometry that confuses other people when he talks about it, but it seems to bring him comfort and excitement. (For the record, Rocky is the only one who rolls with it and asks him to tell him more.)

Both Elsa and Viktor have trauma from the war and show signs of PTSD. Viktor also used to stay at the Arbogast house to help keep them safe. When Ivy and Rocky arrive at her house, Elsa asks about Viktor and talks about him later on. This probably means that they were friends.

Corporal punishment was the standard for raising children in the early 20th century, especially in Ireland. Nina slaps Rocky and pushes him down the stairs in two different scenes. Rocky even mentions Nina caning (beating someone with a walking cane) him if he got mud on Freckle’s clothes— which might have been a joke, but it had to come from some truth. Rocky was shown to get into all kinds of trouble as a child, though we don’t see the consequences for it. At the time, “physical punishments” were considered normal, but there is now extensive, undeniable research that shows what kind of psychological damage it causes later in the child’s life. You’ve read the comic, and you know that Rocky is not mentally healthy.

[libraryofgage]

A Place Like Steve in a Boy Like This

Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually

Debbie and Fester Addams One | Two | Three | Four Rick and Evelyn O'Connell One | Two | Three (you’re here!) Harley Quinn One 10th Doctor and Rose One | Two (on the way!) Scooby Gang (there are plans for this one lmao, so plz be patient with me orz) Jedidiah and Octavius (from Night at the Museum) One Queen Clarisse (also on the way and also a modern royalty au cuz I got the urge to write one so bad lmao)

This AU was line-jumped on Ko-Fi, which means y'all got it sooner!

If you want to line jump your favorite series, you can learn more here

I hope y'all enjoy this part! It was a lotta fun to write, actually, since I got to talk about folklore I'm more familiar with lol

As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)

----

Steve huffs as he kicks a pebble down the street. It bounces a few times before settling on the sidewalk, doing nothing interesting enough to alleviate his boredom. He turns around, squinting against the sun shining in his eyes, and looks at his parents. His mother is speaking quietly to a woman with a shawl around her shoulders, both of them bent over some book that definitely should have been crumbling by now. His father idly taps at bricks on the building next to them, looking relaxed but alert.

Steve glances at the building his parents are avoiding, the one the woman with the shawl walked out of. It’s a pale, faded yellow, the kind that tells him the building is old, old enough to have seen wars and generations pass it by. Shingles line a low roof, but something that’s either incredibly durable wood or stone so old it’s turned brown makes up the vaguely mountain-shaped top that reaches to the sky. Steve studies the building, his eyes wandering until he sees the door cracked open on the side. 

He takes a slow step towards it, checks that neither of his parents noticed, and takes another. This continues until he’s in the shadow of the building, his fingers brushing against the wood. It’s cool against his skin, and the door isn’t nearly as heavy as it looks. He pushes lightly against it, an eager feeling building in the pit of his stomach as he slips inside.

A dimly lit hall made of stone sprawls out in front of him, and Steve hums softly as he passes by the paintings and scraps of scroll that are framed along the wall. He recognizes Hebrew on all the scrolls, but he doesn’t linger long enough to read any of it. Instead, he continues to walk, glancing through an opening that leads into a sanctuary. The opening is to the left of the bema, and he’s momentarily caught by the ark that contains the Torah. He can’t even see the holy scrolls, but something in his spine jerks and he’s overwhelmed by the urge to open the doors so he can gaze upon them. 

He’s already going to get in trouble for slipping inside, though. Maybe he shouldn’t make it worse. Steve grasps this thought tightly, holding it in his mind until he’s able to tear his gaze away and continue walking down the hall. Other than that opening, there’s only one door left at the very end. It, too, is made of wood and opens far easier than Steve expected.

Shafts of sunlight stream in through narrow windows, illuminating dust that floats in the still air of an undisturbed staircase. Steve looks down at the first steps, crouches, and drags his finger carefully over the stone. A layer of dust comes off, and Steve comes to the conclusion that nobody has been up these stairs in a long, long time. 

With a grin, Steve begins to climb. 

The stairs wind up and up, far higher than Steve thinks should be possible given the height of the building itself, but what does he know? He just focuses on climbing, on reaching the top as he passes narrow window after narrow window, breathing in stale air that stirs in his lungs and builds. Strangely enough, he’s not breathless from the climbing, but from something else entirely. He isn’t able to name that feeling until he finally (finally) reaches the top of the stairs. 

As he stands on the top step and looks over the loft spread out before him, he realizes it was anticipation. Like the stairs, this attic-loft is covered in dust, untouched by people for a very long time. A large window is opposite the stairs, allowing sunlight to stream into the area. The space holds a desk, a bed, more books than Steve has ever seen before, and a statue.

Steve stares at the statue, licks his lips nervously, and steps into the room. He doesn’t spare the books or anything else a second glance, instead making a beeline for the statue. It’s huge, towering over the twelve-years-old Steve even though it’s sitting. Its legs are crossed, and its hands are held palm-up just above its navel. The statue is round and smooth, not a straight edge in sight. It doesn’t have a neck, and its head is like a little bump on its shoulders, just big enough to hold triangle-shaped divots for eyes. Carefully placed next to the statue is a small clay jar and a paintbrush.

Without thinking, Steve picks up the jar and looks inside. Golden-hued paint shimmers inside, and Steve wonders how it hasn’t caked over or disintegrated after all this time. He tilts the clay pot a few times, watching the paint slide against the edges, and then looks up at the statue again. At second glance, he sees that the statue’s head is big enough for more than just its eyes. He could probably write on it, too. 

With that thought, Steve grabs the paintbrush and very carefully pokes his foot against the statue’s leg. It seems strong enough, so he climbs up, following the statue’s calf to its knee. From there, he carefully holds the paintbrush with his teeth so he can steady himself on the statue’s arm. Once he has, Steve pulls himself up onto the statue’s hands, finding himself at the perfect height to reach its forehead.

Steve holds the paintbrush and dips it into the jar. The brush comes out covered in the gold paint, and Steve pauses, looking at the statue’s forehead.

He remembers a story his mother once told him about this very city, this very building. It involved a statue like this one, a golem, that was brought to life to protect his mom’s ancestors. Steve hums softly and carefully paints aleph, mem, tav on the statue’s forehead. His mom will find it funny when he brings her up here to show her the “golem” he found. 

As he finishes off the tav, giving it a pretty little flourish just for the fun of it, the ground beneath him jerks. No, not the ground. The hands he’s standing on. Steve yelps, losing his balance and about to fall only to be cradled and carefully set on the ground.

Steve blinks, looking up at the golem to see it leaning down and staring at him expectantly. “Uh. Hi,” he says, breathless as he receives a small nod and wave in return. “Holy shit.”

Before he can say more, he hears a familiar voice in the distance shouting, “Steve! Where are you?”

Keeping his eyes on the golem, Steve sets the jar and paint down, scooting back along the floor until he reaches the top of the stairs. “I’m up here!” he shouts, hearing a muffled curse and the slam of a door far below. He sighs and stands, slowly approaching the golem.

“You’re really real,” he mumbles, stopping in front of the golem as he hears someone running up the steps.

He turns just in time to see his father reach the attic, guns at the ready, and panting from adrenaline and the climb. “What the fuck is that?!” he shouts, aiming the guns at the golem without thinking. 

“Don’t shoot it!” Steve yells, barely getting the words out before he’s scooped into the golem’s arms and completely covered by its hands. The world goes dark, and he’s pressed close enough to the golem’s chest that all he can smell is pomegranate and the old ink and paper of Talmud studies. 

“It’s holding you captive, and you’re telling me not to shoot it?!” his father asks. 

“It’s protecting him!” his mother shouts, her voice shrill and panicked enough about his father shooting a golem to make Steve almost laugh.

Steve wiggles around, tapping the golem’s chest. “Those are my parents,” he says, “Please let me down.”

After a few seconds of hesitation, the golem does, carefully and slowly placing Steve on his feet once more. Its hands stay on either side of him, looking ready to pull him back into its protective embrace. His father looks harried, but his mother looks awed as she steps forward. The golem allows her to approach, and she carefully runs her fingers over the golem’s arms. “This is amazing, Steve,” she says softly.

“Can we please step away from the dangerous statue now?” his father asks, taking a step forward only to stop when the golem suddenly stands and towers over him. “Uh, what’s it doing?”

“You’re not Jewish, Rick,” Steve’s mother says, looking over her shoulder. “The golem is a protective figure in Jewish folklore, among other things. It’s most famous stories are about keeping Jewish towns safe from pogroms. It’s wary of you.”

“I’m your husband!” Steve’s father protests, angrily shoving his guns back into their holsters, “And Steve’s father! We should be on the same team!”

“It’s okay,” Steve says, walking over to his father and taking his hand. “I just have to introduce you.” With that, Steve leads his father over to the golem, placing his father’s hand on its arm, and saying, “This is someone you should protect, too.”

----------

After explaining everything, with plenty of interruptions from the kids after they came running back into the living room to escape Uncle Jonathan’s gin, Steve’s parents demanded to see the lab where it all started. 

And now they’re here, standing in one of the lower levels, surrounded by dead vines that still haunt Steve’s nightmares on particularly bad nights. If he’s lucky, he won’t have one of those while his parents are home, but Steve has never really called himself lucky in situations that don’t involve life or death. 

The wall that once held a gate to the Upside Down is nothing more than charred cement, reduced to a jagged line of something Steve really hopes is soot and not, like, disintegrated demogorgon. He carefully makes his way through the vines, avoiding them when he can and holding his breath whenever he has to step on one. 

“Did you know this was a lab?” Rick asks, his voice echoing in the hall ahead of them. 

“Of course, not,” Evelyn replies, and Steve can picture the glare she’s aiming at him. “I wouldn’t have let our son live here if I’d known.”

“Well,” Eddie says, “I, for one, and very relieved Stevie lived here considering several of us would be dead without him.”

“Me, too,” Dustin says.

“Me three,” El says.

“I think Steve and I would’ve found each other even if he wasn’t in Hawkins,” Robin says, nudging Steve’s ribs with her elbow as she grins. “Platonic soulmates can’t he kept apart.”

Steve snorts and stops when he reaches the wall. He looks around and notices the corpse of a demodog a few feet away. Or, well, he thinks it’s a demodog corpse. “Stay here,” he says, tightening his grip on his bat as he takes a step closer to it.

“Hold it right there, young man,” his mother says, her tone bringing him to an immediate halt. “Your father will go towards the monster, and you will stay a safe distance away.”

“Gee, thanks for asking,” Rick mutters, rolling his shoulders as he makes his way over to the demodog corpse. He studies it for a second before just kicking the thing with his foot. Steve nearly jumps in to yank his father back, but stays frozen in place by Robin’s hand coming to rest on his shoulder.

His father kicks the corpse again, and Eddie suddenly asks, “Why do I feel like this is disrespectful?”

“Because it used to be alive,” El offers.

“It’s definitely not anymore,” Rick says, crouching down and using the barrel of his gun to push back one of the petals on its head. “Shit, what’s it need so many teeth for?”

“The better to eat you with,” Steve says, earning a snort from Robin and Eddie.

“And there were how many of these?” Evelyn asks.

“Dozens. Like, multiple packs, and they were all connected by this hive mind kinda thing,” Dustin explains, walking over to the corpse with no fear. “I mean, they weren’t all bad. Dart was okay.”

“He ate your cat,” Steve says.

“Yeah, and then he didn’t eat us in the tunnel.”

“I can’t believe you were facing these things and didn’t use your guns to spare some girl’s feelings,” Rick says, looking at Steve over his shoulder.

“I can’t believe you didn’t just use the golem,” his mother says, frowning as she turns to Steve. “I mean, you know where it is, dear. You know how to bring it to life.”

“A golem? Like…from Lord of the Rings?” Dustin asks.

“You had a golem? Why didn’t you tell me you had a golem?” Eddie asks.

“How did we not think of the golem? Holy shit, we’re dumb,” Robin says, smacking her forehead with her palm.

“I couldn’t trust that it wouldn’t hurt one of my friends,” Steve says, ignoring Dustin for now. “It would only protect me and Robin. If something happened to one of us, it would abandon the kids without question. What’s the point then?”

“Hello! Confused people over here!” Dustin shouts, getting their attention. “What golem?”

“You know,” Robin says, “like…of Prague.”

“No, still lost,” Dustin says.

Steve sighs, about to explain it when Eddie beats him to it. “The golem is from Jewish folklore,” he says, tilting his head as he looks at Steve, “It was created and brought to life by a rabbi in Prague to protect his congregation from pogroms and acts of antisemitism. There are debates on why he had to disintegrate the golem, though. Some stories say it started killing innocent people, others say it fell in love, and others say the congregation were using it to do chores instead of letting it focus on protecting them.”

“Yes, exactly,” Evelyn says, smiling at Eddie and nodding with approval, “The golem doesn’t speak much, but it can answer basic questions. According to it, Rabbi Loew removed its aleph because it requested to go to sleep.”

“Oh, so it just wanted a nap,” El says, nodding as though this makes perfect sense to her.

“You said you had the golem,” Eddie says. “Where?”

“At the house,” Steve replies, watching as his father stands from the corpse and drags Dustin away from it. “I keep it in the locked room downstairs.”

“You said that was your parents’ room,” Dustin says.

“No, you assumed it was, and I never corrected you.”

“Can I see it?” Eddie asks.

Steve looks up, meeting Eddie’s gaze. After a few seconds, he nods once and looks at his parents. “Did you see what you wanted?” he asks, “Can we head back?”

“Yeah,” Rick says, frowning as he nudges a vine with his foot. “I’ll come back later with Ardeth. See if he knows anything that might help.”

“What do we need help with?” Dustin asks. “The portal is closed for good. We closed it.”

“There’s nothing wrong with making sure,” Evelyn tells him, smiling reassuringly before turning back the way they came. “Now that Rick and I are here, we’ll do everything we can to make sure those gates never open again.”

“And if they do,” Rick says, bringing up the rear as the kids follow Evelyn, “we’ll take care of it. You kids don’t need to put yourselves in danger anymore.”

Something in Steve settles at hearing this, his next exhale taking all the stress that had made its home between his shoulders with it. For the first time in a long time, he thinks about something normal. He glances at Eddie and Robin and thinks about going to see a movie with them, drinking at the lake, and just being stupid teens that don’t have to worry about interdimensional monsters.

------

Tag List (there should be room still! So, if you’d like a tag, let me know!)

@trueghostqueen, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @thoughtfulbreadpolice, @mogami13, @blcksh33p1987, @beawritingbooks, @remus-is-trans, @your-confused-friend, @estrellami-1, @nburkhardt, @vacantwatchers, @yeahhhh-suga, @phantomcat94

@blackpanzy, @ape31, @croatoan-like-its-hot, @plantzzsandpencilzzs, @flustratedcas, @anne-bennett-cosplayer, @just-a-tiny-void, @disrespectedgoatman, @fallingleavesinthewind, @nymime, @nectandra, @moomkin77, @nadenia, @resident-disappointment, @copper-arrows, @romanticdestruction, @rowanshadow26

@nadenia, @northernlight-witch, @steddie-as-they-go,

[quantumcartography]

Eventually I'm gonna do a deep dive on every name in the Locked Tomb series but I've been sitting on this dissection of The Emperor's chosen name for a long time and I want to put it into the world. So, here it is.

The Emperor John Gaius, His Celestial Kindliness, the First Reborn, King of the Nine Renewals, Necromancer Divine, our Resurrector, and The Necrolord Prime

“NOTE: He’s just some guy, you know?

NOTE II: Gaius was not the name John was born with. He picked it for himself circa Y100 of his reign.”

These two names have so much potential meaning tied up in them so buckle up.

First, the literal translations. John is a derivative of the Biblical Hebrew Yohanan which is in turn derived from the Yehohanan, which means literally “Yahweh has been gracious.” Gaius is a Latin name that likely derives from the latin gaudere “to rejoice.” This more or less makes the name say “Huzzah! God has been good!” Now, there is one other tweak to this. Gaia is the Greek personification of the Earth (Terra is the Roman equivalent) and if you slapped the Latin masculine ending on it, it would become Gaius. This does provide a tie to the planet Earth in his name (which is far more obvious in Gideon’s name of Kiriona Gaia) and would make sense if he picked it as a memorial to the dead Earth to which he could never return.

Next, modern social interpretation. John for a long time held the title of “most common name in the English speaking world.” I believe it’s since been surpassed by James, but it’s still up there. Gaius, funnily enough, was the Ancient Roman equivalent of John. It was one of the most common given names for so long that it became semi-synonymous with saying “some guy” similar to the phrase “Tom, Dick, and Harry” or “don’t know him from Adam.” These two names make his name something like “John John” or “Jon Doe” or “James Q. Public.”

Next: the strictly biblical interpretation. The most obvious link here is to the book of the New Testament, John 3. This is a letter by one of the many biblical Johns to a man named Gaius concerning some pretty mundane church business of the time and thanking Gaius for looking after some poor missionaries. It’s honestly a supremely drab book of the bible and doesn’t really get into doctrine or legends or exciting apocalypse stuff. It’s just a letter from a church leader to a rich patron. If someone more versed in Biblical history and literature can shed some light on this book, I’d be very thankful.

Next: some name associations. Being two of the most common names in history, we kinda have a wealth of options to pick from. Saint John the Apostle was the one who actually walked with Jesus and was the brother of the Apostle James with whom they made up the Boanerges, the Sons of Thunder. John of Patmos was the likely author of the Book of Revelation and maybe the same as John the Apostle (but probably not.) The author who wrote about the apocalypse seems pretty fitting. Gaius was also the praenomen (given name) of the two Caesars responsible for the death of the Roman Republic and the birth of the Roman Empire: Gaius Julius Caesar and Gaius Octavius who became Caesar Augustus.

Julius Caesar is definitely the most well known Emperor of Rome/salad inventor and also second dictator for life (Sulla was the first so Caesar can’t take that title.) He was an incredibly popular general who was part of an alliance of three figures (him, Pompey, and Crassus) to increase their own power, wealth, and standing. When Crassus died, tensions formed between Pompey and Caesar until Pompey had the senate recall Caesar from his war in Gaul to be removed from command. Caesar knew this would lead to his execution at the hands of his rival so he made his own play, marching his troops into Rome (an act tantamount to sacrilege) to try and capture Pompey which spoiler he didn’t. It sparked a civil war that raged all the way around the Mediterranean for four years and left Caesar as the de facto ruler of the Roman Republic up until an unfortunate accident in the senate where he fell into knives 23 times. He had it coming. This idea of attacking his enemy before they have a chance to attack you only to have your enemy slip away is a notable parallel.

Gaius Octavius had been named as Caesar’s successor in his will and would go on to become the first proper Roman Emperor. He used the newfound power from his great-uncle’s death to form a new three person alliance (him, Lepidus, and Mark Antony) and hunt down Julius Caesar’s assassins and rake in treasure while cementing their political power. Surprise surprise though because Caesar Augustus (the name given Gaius Octavius after he became the Emperor) managed to politically, militarily, and psychologically out maneuver his two fellow rulers and within seven years he had metaphorically put Lepidus in the ground and literally put Mark Antony in the ground. Now, while in life Julius Caesar made a lot of moves to imply that he wanted to be the king of Rome, not least of which was modeling himself as descended from the gods and enshrining himself alongside them as equals. Augustus doubled down on this by starting a massive and complex propaganda machine to make himself equally divine, even within his own lifetime and immediately afterwards.

Both of these men led the Romans into civil wars that ravaged the empire. Both of them committed acts of sacrilege in the ancient world to further their political games of revenge. Both of them lied, cheated, stole, killed, and manipulated to gain more power and remake the world to be what they wanted. They were geniuses who may have even had good intentions and put an end to a long period of political instability, but through blood and steel and no small part vengeance.

Now I would be remiss if I didn’t address the elephant in the room that is Homestuck. I will say that my adoration of The Locked Tomb series has sent me down innumerable rabbit holes. I have researched paper manufacturing, the magnetic forces of Jupiter, Catholic prayers, polygenic phenotyping, Ancient Greek and Roman poetry, national anthems of nations of the world, and the psychology of Among Us. But the rabbit hole that is the MS Paint Adventures Wiki is one too daunting for even me. But in any case, I have no doubt that these characters sharing a name is no coincidence.

Lastly, the use of a Hebrew and Latin name makes this fascinating marriage of opposites. To massively understate it, Romans and Christians did not get along for a long time. Obviously now, the Catholic Church is seated in Rome, but for a BIG portion of the early Christian ministry, the Romans were the ones who captured them and set them on fire or crucified them or other fun and exciting means of execution. More than that, an apostle to Jesus’ monotheistic peace-loving and merciful message being linked with two deified and bloody conquerors of Ancient Rome does create this interesting tension. This tension is something very interesting in modern Catholicism as well as the Locked Tomb’s Empire.

[mariacallous]

On March 11, Pramila Patten, the United Nations’ special representative of the secretary-general on sexual violence in conflict, presented a report to the U.N. Security Council on her fact-finding mission to Israel and the Palestinian territories regarding the events of Oct. 7, 2023. Her mission, she stated, “threw light on the indiscriminate and coordinated attacks by Hamas and other armed groups against multiple military and civilian targets, aimed to kill, to inflict suffering and abduct the maximum number possible of men, women, and children—soldiers and civilians alike—in the minimum possible amount of time.”

According to the report, Patten and her team “conducted interviews according to UN standards and methodology, with a total of 34 interviewees, including with survivors and witnesses of the 7 October attacks, released hostages, first responders, health and service providers and others.” Further interviews were conducted with the families of hostages still held in captivity. Patten’s team also met with civil society organizations, went to a military base where bodies of those killed during the attack were brought for identification and release to families, and examined four locations in the Gaza periphery where attacks took place.

Based on this, Patten said in her remarks to the Security Council that her team had found “clear and convincing information” of “a catalogue of the most extreme and inhumane forms of killing, torture and other horrors” and other violations that had occurred, including “sexual violence, abduction of hostages and corpses, the public display of captives, both dead and alive, the mutilation of corpses, including decapitation and desecration of bodies as well as the looting and destruction of civilian property.”

Patten’s report joins an earlier statement made by U.N. human rights experts Alice Edwards and Morris Tidball-Binz that was also sent to the Palestinian Authority and Hamas, calling for full accountability for the multitude of alleged crimes committed against civilians in Israel during the Oct. 7 attacks. It also corroborates other reports, most recently by the Association for Rape Crisis Centers in Israel as well as by the New York Times, Washington Post, Human Rights Watch, BBC, and others, regarding allegations of rape and ongoing sexual abuse of the hostages held in Gaza.

In late March, the New York Times published the first survivor testimony of an alleged sexual assault experienced by an Israeli hostage in Gaza. Amit Soussana, a 40-year-old Israeli lawyer held hostage in Gaza, recalled being chained to a bed and fondled by a guard who constantly inquired about the timing of her period. Two weeks after her abduction, she told the Times, she was beaten and groped while naked and held at gunpoint, and the guard, “with the gun pointed at me, forced me to commit a sexual act on him.”

The Israeli government and some Israeli officials, including IDF officers and members of the community volunteer organization ZAKA (the Hebrew acronym for Disaster Victim Identification, Extraction, and Rescue), have also issued statements and made allegations of sexual abuse by Hamas. However, some of that information has been proved to be false, including reports of alleged atrocities that actually never happened. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu repeated and recirculated these tales and the veracity of an earlier New York Times report based on an Israeli soldier’s allegations has since been called into question by the paper’s own reporters.

However, the fact that the Israeli government has disseminated some disinformation about the events of Oct. 7 or misused the suffering of the victims and the hostages for its own purposes does not render all allegations made by Israeli victims and by other sources false.

Many of the acts described in reports by the U.N., rights groups, and media outlets may constitute war crimes, as defined in the 1949 Geneva Conventions and subsequent protocols, and crimes against humanity, as defined by the 1998 Rome Statute. In addition, international law forbids the taking of hostages during an armed conflict, as defined by the International Committee of the Red Cross. A war crime is a war crime, and both sides should be held accountable for the crimes and human rights violations they have committed.

More than six months after Oct. 7, some media organizations and international groups remain unconvinced that any sexual violence actually occurred that day. Others issue general statements without specific reference to Hamas and Israel, or provide a reluctant acknowledgement that minimizes the scope and severity of the sexual abuse; others ignore or give only passing reference to the plight of the estimated 134 hostages still held in Gaza, at least 19 of whom are women and children, or issue general statements without specific references to Israel and Hamas.

The Intercept published a scathing critique of the earlier New York Times report, noting that “[r]ape is not uncommon in war.” The Intercept article presented the reporting of the Times article as flawed, noting that “at every turn, when the New York Times reporters ran into obstacles confirming tips, they turned to anonymous Israeli officials or witnesses who’d already been interviewed repeatedly in the press. Months after setting off on their assignment, the reporters found themselves exactly where they had begun, relying overwhelmingly on the word of Israeli officials, soldiers, and Zaka workers to substantiate their claim that more than 30 bodies of women and girls were discovered with signs of sexual abuse.” The Intercept implied that the rapes and abuse perpetrated against Israelis were not a systematic or deliberate act of war.

Elsewhere, Guardian columnist Owen Jones claimed on his YouTube channel that the video he watched, put together by the Israel Defense Forces (IDF) from Hamas’s own bodycam footage as well as dashboard and mobile phone footage, provided “no evidence” of war crimes.

More recently, articles in both the Grayzone and Mondoweiss analyze Patten’s report and claim, in the words of the latter, that she actually provided “no evidence of systematic rape.” The Grayzone also published a transcript of a discussion between Max Blumenthal and Chris Hedges in which they agree that Israel created a “shock-and-awe campaign of misinformation” in order to create “political space for its brutal assault on Gaza.” Other essays in the Middle East Eye and Zeteo focus primarily on the plight of women in Gaza, glossing over or failing to mention the plight of the Israeli women held hostage. Responses by certain women’s institutions at the United Nations and other feminist groups have also been muted.

On its website, U.N. Women refers to itself as “the global champion for gender equality,” but it has done little to seek justice for murdered Israeli women or resolve the plight of the hostages. In late November, U.N. Women Executive Director Sima Bahous did indeed brief U.N. Security Council members of the “dire situation of women in Gaza and the hostages.” And on Jan. 19, Bahous issued a statement saying, “I call again for accountability for all those affected by the 7 October attacks.” Bahous also condemned “the unparalleled destruction rained on the people of Gaza” along with a call for the release of the hostages.

But the response of U.N. Women as an organization has been less forthcoming. In late November, U.N. Women posted a condemnation of the “brutal attacks by Hamas on Israel on 7 October,” then replaced it with a statement that dropped the condemnation of the attacks and mention of Hamas, while calling for the release of the hostages. That latter statement was later deleted. Since then, its statements have condemned the deaths of Palestinian women in Gaza without any mention of the Israeli victims or the hostages remaining in Gaza, despite the testimony by released hostage Soussana in the New York Times and Israeli media.

Foreign officials and some advocacy organizations have been similarly equivocal. Interviewed on CNN in January, U.S. House Rep. Pramila Jayapal stated that while rape was “horrific,” it “happens in war situations. Terrorist organizations like Hamas obviously are using these as tools. However, I think we have to be balanced about bringing in the outrages against Palestinians.” (She later issued a statement unequivocally condemning “Hamas’ use of rape and sexual violence as an act of war.”)

In late March, a group of feminists wrote an open letter addressing the Israeli and U.S. governments, claiming that the Israeli government has “chosen to weaponize the issue of sexual violence for political outcome” to shield the IDF’s operations in Gaza amid the ongoing Israel-Hamas war.

In the eyes of many Israeli women, these institutions and organizations have failed to advocate for Israeli victims of sexual violence and for the safety of the remaining hostages—an abdication of their responsibility to protect the lives of all women everywhere. Their inability to simultaneously condemn the gender-based crimes committed by Hamas and the rampant death and destruction caused by Israel in Gaza raises disturbing questions about their understanding of, and commitment to, their mission—and their future relevance.

The downplaying of sexual violence by Hamas is all the more perplexing given the amount of disturbing material already in the public domain. Some of what is known about the gender-based crimes on Oct. 7 comes from testimonies of survivors, the desperate text messages that the victims sent to their families, and recovered cellphones and cameras. And some was provided by journalists or by the attackers themselves, some of whom broadcast their gruesome acts to entire world in real time.

These images include the picture of Naama Levy, bloodied and bruised, as she was loaded onto a Hamas vehicle; the image of terrified Noa Argamani as she was kidnapped to be brought to Gaza; and the photo of Shani Louk, whose mostly naked, splayed body was driven around Gaza on the back of a pickup truck. It is unknown if Louk was dead or alive in the photo; she was reported dead nearly a month later when IDF troops operating in Gaza identified parts of her body. That photo was the first featured in the winning gallery of the team category of Pictures of the Year competition run by the Missouri School of Journalism.

“This has been one of the most documented atrocities in history,” said Ruth Halperin-Kaddari of Bar Ilan University, an expert in international women’s law who served three terms on the U.N. Committee on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women. The denial of the crimes against women constitutes, she said, “a betrayal of everything that these feminist organizations claim to stand for.”

There are several explanations for why previously respected women’s rights organizations might refuse to publicly admit that Hamas is capable of committing war crimes and crimes against humanity, or gloss over these crimes.

Some observers, such the ad hoc group Me Too Unless You’re a Jew, insist that antisemitism is at the heart of the anti-Israel bias. Some academics, such as prominent Israeli sociologist Eva Illouz of the Hebrew University of Jerusalem and historian Aviad Kleinberg of Tel Aviv University, argue that academics and human rights organizations—including the U.N.—have been and part of a far broader alliance between religious Islam and what Illouz refers to as the “‘post-colonial’ left” that has divided the world into victims and perpetrators, leading to a simplistic and distorted view of morality, according to which Palestinians can do no wrong—a view that Hamas has aggressively promoted.

One source—who previously held a high-ranking position at U.N. Women and is still employed by the United Nations, and therefore spoke to Foreign Policy on the condition of anonymity—pointed to bureaucratic and logistical issues as the cause of this disparity, rather than antisemitism or politicization. This source noted that unlike the West Bank and Gaza, Israel, the United States, and other developed Western countries are not considered “program areas for U.N. Women. … As a result, the U.N., a cumbersome, bureaucratic organization bound by all sorts of regulations and limitations, finds it difficult to even to really consider that Israel, or even any Israeli, might ever be a victim of the Palestinians.”

Furthermore, the source noted, Israel has often positioned itself as distant or even aloof from the U.N. and other international organizations. Indeed, Israel has long denigrated the U.N. and maintained that it is inherently hostile to Israel; as early as 1955, then-Prime Minister David Ben Gurion derisively used a made-up Hebrew rhyme, “Um-Shmum” to deny that the U.N. has any importance.

“This plays into an already-existing bias against Israel as an occupying country, and as a result, Israel may receive less understanding, compassion, or even attention from the U.N. and its affiliates,” the U.N. source said.

Based on her familiarity with the United Nations, Halperin-Kaddari—the international women’s law expert—also pointed to procedures and other limitations as a difficulty. But she noted that in comparison with other situations, such as the sexual violence in Foca, Bosnia, in 1992—during which large numbers of Muslims and Croats were tortured, disappeared, raped, or executed, and women were transferred to so-called rape camps—the responses of by U.N. Women and similar organizations has been “appalling slow and terribly inadequate.”

Daphna Hacker, a professor at Tel Aviv University’s faculties of law and gender studies and Israel’s current member of the U.N. Committee on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women, acknowledged that the evidence from Oct. 7 may not meet the “usual criterion” of U.N. and other international investigations.

“The intensity and manner in which these crimes were perpetrated is unprecedented,” Hacker said. “Hamas murdered or kidnapped most of their victims; the hostages have not been released and, as feminist researchers, we know that if there are surviving eyewitnesses or survivors, they may not come forward for many years, if ever. But the testimony that we do have is horrific.”

Tal Hochman, the director-general of the Israel Women’s Network, Israel’s foremost feminist advocacy organization, also acknowledged that there are numerous difficulties surrounding the evidence. She said that ZAKA, the nongovernmental rescue and recovery organization tasked by the government to recover the bodies after the Oct. 7 attacks, did not prioritize forensic examinations.

“ZAKA gave priority to identifying the bodies and bringing them to rapid burial, which is a holy commandment in Judaism,” Hochman said. “We do not have all of the evidence that we could have had, but I also understand the families’ pain and need for burial and closure.”

In the days following the attack, Hochman added, she volunteered at the Shura military base, the forensic collection center and morgue to which bodies from the Oct. 7 attack were brought. “We did not have enough refrigerators to perform complete forensic examinations of all of the bodies,” she said.

“To honor these women, the U.N. and other organizations cannot hide behind protocols and logistics,” Hacker said. “The organizations must adapt to the reality that the victims suffered, and the hostages continue to suffer, in order to bring them the justice they deserve.”

Orit Sulitzeanu, the director of the Association for Rape Crisis Centers in Israel—which published the first comprehensive report regarding the attacks­—noted that the report produced by her organization “meets the highest standards of reporting. It is offensive that are findings are dismissed because of misuse by some Israeli individuals or officials. We are a nongovernmental agency—our report should be judged on its merits as an investigative report.”

Furthermore, she commented on the recent U.N. report: “What about the report by Patten? It is ludicrous to dismiss her report as if she were part of Israeli hasbara.”

Weaponizing the abuse of women and conflict-related sexual crimes to promote other agendas—whether the Israeli government’s or its opponents’—is a deliberate victimization of women and a betrayal of all women, everywhere.

Accusations of sexual-based war crimes must be investigated, no matter who the victim and the alleged perpetrator are. Sexual violence is abhorrent, no matter on which side of the border between Israel and Gaza the victims are and no matter if the victims are Israeli or Palestinian. Justifying or excusing the crimes of Oct. 7 as if they were acts of liberation and resistance implies that Israeli women are in some way complicit in their victimization, or perhaps deserved their fate, because they are citizens of an occupying power.

A position paper published in early December by a coalition of six Arab women’s organizations in Israel takes a more morally upstanding position. The coalition members clearly state that they do not question the reports of sexual assaults against Israeli women and “call upon the women [and] feminist activists … to boldly condemn all violations, including killings, demolitions, and displacements occurring in the relentless war against the Palestinian people, particularly affecting women and children in Gaza. … Our feminist values dictate that we cannot accept any excuses for violating human rights.”

In some future, we in this region will struggle to rebuild and create new societies predicated on freedom, security, and opportunity for all. To do so, we must learn to hold multiple, even contradictory, truths—and to feel pain for ourselves and our enemies simultaneously.

That means recognizing the anguish of the many thousands of women and children in Gaza who have been traumatized by the appalling deprivation, chaos, violence, and death at the hands of the IDF and the Israeli government and—at the same time—demanding justice for all of Hamas’s victims.

Justice is meant to be universal and indivisible. By minimizing the dehumanization of Israeli women and the hostages still in Gaza, many publications and organizations have undermined this crucial, seemingly self-evident axiom. And by denying the universalism of war crimes and crimes against humanity, they have abdicated their basic responsibility.

Instead of assuming positions of moral selectivity, U.N. institutions and all organizations and publications dedicated to human rights can and must apply their prestige, influence, and extensive funding to advocate for all women, investigate all credible allegations, bring all perpetrators to justice before an international court, and provide support for all victims.

[kindheart525]

Dottieverse Fun Facts

Just a list of random fun facts about the Dottieverse cast! I've done separate posts on some of these tidbits but I wanted to put all the info in one place and add some bits that might not warrant posts on their own

I’ll keep editing this post as I come up with more fun facts! This isn’t complete by any means so keep checking back for more. Please feel free to suggest some too and maybe they’ll be added to the list!

Dottie Dompler

Her favorite drink is boba tea

Writes film reviews on Letterboxd in her free time

Doesn’t remember what she studied in college as she spent most of her time there picking up dudes

Keeps two diaries: One for general thoughts and feelings and another exclusively for documenting her love life in detail

Has an OnlyFans

Actually has some ex-girlfriends (one or two from experimenting in college and a few trans lady exes who presented as male when she dated them)

Kip Pimling

Is left-handed

Loves Chappell Roan and other similar artists

Used to do musical theater in middle school and still loves to do karaoke

Started seeing a therapist as an angsty preteen and still goes regularly for mental health upkeep

Sucked her thumb to self-soothe until she was 5 years old

Now she fidgets with her hair when stressed

She and Dottie dressed up for the Barbie movie 30th anniversary theater re-release (in 2053)

Got her B.A. in psychology fully online so she could stay in her hometown and intern for Smiling Friends

Whenever someone is bigoted or just plain mean in her presence she donates to corresponding charities in their name (ex: meeting a queerphobe and donating to an LGBTQ organization for them)

Ell Pimling

Giorno’s nickname for her is “Slowpoke”

Fucking horrible at driving; always goes way over the speed limit

When she wants to talk to a tall person she just climbs them

Her taste in women overlaps with Giorno's so they often bond by gushing over attractive female athletes together

Nee Pimling

Has a small, persistent bruise on his bicep where he pinches himself every time his conscience “acts up”

Dur Pimling

Secretly skilled in graphic design; all of the advertisements for his and Nee’s laundromat were made by him

Blep Simpson

Multilingual in Wingon, Latin, American Sign Language, Hebrew, and English (which she never speaks but can understand)

Gola Simpson

Talks with Allan’s inflection and pronunciation style

Wore a wig as a teenager out of insecurity

Giorno Simpson

Ell’s nickname for him is “Twiggy”

His social media is mostly full of videos of him doing various workouts but he also has a "making fun of short people" series which has featured Suzy, Eep, Chad, and Ell

Secretly very good at singing but he isn’t super open about it

Glorp Simpson

Suzy Simpson

Owns a vast collection of hats to wear for every occasion

Is a horse girl; she owns a little pony named Rapunzel with a long mane that matches hers

Really wants to do coordinated Halloween costumes with Eep, but since Eep will never go out with her she does it with her niece Royal instead

Eep Simpson

Has a collection of hair bows much like Suzy’s hat collection; they share a literal “hats and bows” closet

Very prone to anxiety-induced stomachaches

Terrified of Halloween

Chad Simpson

Enjoys collecting fancy watches, and also has some silly kid ones from his sisters

Likes horses like Suzy does, but he doesn't like dirt so he bonds with her over sharing facts and watching races rather than riding them

Crawdad Crustacean

Has a southern accent that comes and goes

Chucky Dompler II

His Zodiac sign is Cancer (born in July)

Was born a full two weeks past his due date

Very skilled in Dungeons and Dragons

Pim “Beef” Pimling-Simpson II

Lost his legs from getting them tangled in holiday lights and falling down the stairs

When strangers in public ask him why he doesn’t have legs, he makes up different horrible stories about how he lost them to make them regret asking

[edenfenixblogs]

Attention Goy Friends!

I was recently asked by another goy friend on Facebook to explain something. And I thought I’d share it here for people who are not in the know.

This person wanted to know why we get SO upset when synagogues are defaced. It wasn’t like they were telling me they didn’t understand why we got upset at all. But they didn’t seem to understand where the depth of feeling came from, especially when there is actual genocide happening to Palestinians. This is a good person acting in good faith and is working on holding two truths at once, so I answered. Here’s what I told them:

First of all, of course, we can fight for Palestinian liberation shoulder to shoulder and feel as awful as you do about it! I hate this genocidal Likud party and their deranged evil leader just like anyone else would. This does not mean we don’t also carry our own pain. It doesn’t mute the pain we carry for Palestinians. We just feel EVEN WORSE on top of that.

Second, with regard to synagogues and other places of Jewish social gathering—I think those of us living in Christian-majority nations all know a fair bit about Christian history just by way of cultural exchange. But if you are not aware—The Protestant split in Europe led to the translation of Church services and texts into English/the primary spoken languages of the various Western European nations worshipping within various Jesus-centric religions. This was a huge and important milestone for poor and lower class people who had every right to participate equally and fully in their religion and could now understand the scriptures and services.

However, to this day, shul is conducted in Hebrew. Prayers are sung in Hebrew. In every Jewish synagogue regardless of denomination. Sure, there are often parts in the common tongue of the area too, but the prayers themselves are still in Hebrew. Usually the same melodies or selection of melodies too. And it’s not because we are some elitist group, as some might claim.

It’s because, even in diaspora, I can go to any Jewish community in the entire world. I may not speak the common tongue of whatever place I end up. But I can go there, listen for the sound of Jewish prayer. If I have nothing to my name and no money or food or home or safety I can look for some Hebrew on a door or a Jewish star and listen for someone singing Oseh Shalom or the Shema Yisrael or the V’ahavta in the same melody that I learned it growing up. And I will have found safety. I will have found community. I will have found people who understand me.

And the part of this that I think most goyim don’t understand is that because of our long history with Christianity there is statistically a more than 50% chance that I or other members of my generation will actually NEED to employ that Jewish community as a resource in the exact circumstance I described above. Because we become victims of genocide within 2-3 generation intervals like clockwork for the last 2000 years.

When a synagogue is attacked in a nation that allows antisemitic hatred to foment unchecked it is such a brutal emotional blow. Because every synagogue destroyed is a safe place for Jews that is no longer safe. Not for the people who go there regularly. And certainly not for the people who may need to go there—who will VERY LIKELY need to go there. And with each space eliminated, we are sent further into diaspora.

[kitkatcabbit]

Venting about my own stupid brain after the cut

I’m trying to learn Korean. I’m not doing a very good job of learning Korean. There’s a number of reasons why (difficulty still in telling some of the vowels apart, recognizing words whole instead of reading them phonetically which means I forget what the letters sound like, which means I can’t read new words, etc), but of the reasons I’m having trouble, the ones that are the most prevalent are tied back to the gifted child problem. I never really learned how to study, because I didn’t have to learn how to study. I crammed before quizzes or tests, held the information just as long as necessary, and then poof, it was gone as soon as I didn’t need it anymore.

I’m also discovering I have inherent anxiety about being bad at things, even things that it’s perfectly reasonable for me to be bad at (like a new skill). I got so used to tying my worth/identity to how immediately good at things I was, that if I’m not immediately good at a thing, I just give up, because what’s the point? Just the idea of trying to speak Korean out loud- even in a room where I’m alone, even something simple- has me crying, because it’s like an ingrained response to not letting myself do something where there’s even a remote chance I’ll get it wrong. Trying to get myself to practice saying something out loud is like trying to get myself to put my hand on an active stove burner- technically, yeah I can do it, but it’s like my body/brain won’t let me out of a fucked-up sense of self-defense/preservation.

I don’t know how to get past it, I don’t know how to learn how to learn, how to learn to be okay with being bad at things without just giving up when it’s uncomfortable. If there was some way to know for certain that I had the capacity to learn it, it might be easier, but without actually trying to do it, there’s just no way to know, and the idea of trying to do it and then failing hurts enough it’s making it near impossible to try in the first place.

I’m frustrated. I don’t want to just give up, because that feels like failure, too, and so I’m in a place where no matter what I do, I feel like I’m failing. If I just stop trying, that’s failure. If I try and discover that no, I can’t actually learn it, that’s failure, too, and wasted time/energy on top of it. And sure, there’s the third option, the one where I can do it, but of course my brain doesn’t let that one enter the possibility list at all, because learning a second language and being able to retain it isn’t a thing I’ve ever managed to do before. I’ve had to try learning two other languages before (Hebrew and Spanish), and wasn’t especially good at managing either beyond what I absolutely had to. I was hoping that trying to learn a language I wanted to learn, as opposed to one I was being forced to learn/study would make a difference, but my brain doesn’t seem to read it any differently and I hate that I don’t know how to get around it.

Part of it is likely figuring out the way I learn best, but I have no idea what that is, since I feel like I don’t know how to learn things in the first place (or at least not things that don’t have a physical/hands-on component). I’m trying duolingo right now, but I’m at an impasse because I’ve figured out it’s not really working for me, but I also don’t want to just stop, because I worry if I do then I won’t continue with anything, which again equals failure. I downloaded Rocket Korean to try, but as soon as I got to the first point in the lesson where it wanted me to try to say something out loud, I ended up just closing the program in tears. For the same reason, I’m loathe to take an actual course, even if it would be helpful, because I can’t imagine trying to do it without having a meltdown every single class, or again, just proving I can’t actually do it.

I wish my brain would let me see an option other than just the different ways I can fail. I wish I’d known earlier that I had ADHD and needed better support in figuring out how to learn efficiently/correctly. I wish a lot of things, but don’t know how to make any of the things I have the potential to change actually change. How do you get a brain that survives on getting all the little scraps of dopamine it can find focus/work on a thing without the guarantee of reward? How do I get a brain that seems intent on only immediate gratification to work on a thing that might eventually give that but with no guarantee? Because I haven’t figured that out yet, and I have a feeling that until I can, I’m just fucked, and that feeling just sucks (all this on top of it feeling incredibly arrogant to say something like ‘I don’t know how to be bad at things’, because that feels shitty, too).

[deafmusictheory]

Back to the River Aras…

What a way to make an entrance! 😅

I’m learning BSL. Does that make me an immigrant? According to every fascist ever, yes actually. Because they only care about it if it’s done their way. The nazis looked at the Yiddish and thought, why don’t they speak German properly. Because Hebrew is just as beautiful as German, duh! So they took the “swastika” a symbol of peace in the hindic trandtions, they took the word aryan, literally just the name of a river once, far away.

“Ich bin Ärisch” (sic 🤮)

John Ronald Reul Tolkien, traumatised by the 1st world war, first half of his name Anglo Saxon and second half modern German, responded correctly in a letter to a German publisher who wanted to translate the hobbit into German:

I paraphrase:’ what the fuck do you mean “aryan” I’m not from the Aras river and neither are you!”

They just change all the words around every 20 years and it’s fine for those who’ve learned to cope with it but damn, for young people that stuff is horrible. Constantly having their identities questioned like that. I know because all communication is warning, ultimately.

And yes, to warn falsely, is to create more distrust in the world. And distrust doesn’t cancel individual truths. It erodes the concept of truth from the inside out.

My name is Samantha.

I love music still.

I’m D/deaf.

[hiswordsarekisses]

“So, he committed adultery. Big deal! It doesn’t mean he murdered his wife. It doesn’t even count in the course of this trial!” The big city lawyer thundered.

But the man had indeed murdered his wife.

And while I agree that adultery doesn’t equal a murder, it did matter in the course of his life. Today, we’re pretty loose about adultery, marriage, divorce, and the covenants of God. But that doesn’t mean God has changed His mind.

In a little book in the back of the Old Testament of Scriprure, God talks to the Priests first, the he tell the people why

they are losing favor with Him, why He won’t accept what they want to give Him. It’s because you’re unfaithful to each other!

One God created you, but you’re unfaithful to each other. Why?! He is a witness to husbands and wives of their youth. God has made you One in the spirit, through

a sacred holy covenant with Him,

in Him a joint spirit.

I feel this the longer I’m married.

We become one flesh through covenant

sexual relations, to bring godly offspring into the world, as a gift to the one we married, as a service made for marriage. That’s why purity and virginity are valuable.

They are part of a sacred covenant.

Do you hear that very often?

I bet not.

Now, most of the time, we read that

“God hates divorce” from this passage.

He does, but the Hebrew text goes

deeper linguistically.

God actually calls divorce a

“hateful thing” in His eyes, that it renders you covered in “violence”, from hurting

the very one you were given to protect!

That’s the true depth.

Here, I think He highlights something we don’t often speak in Christian circles.

The violence of divorce.

The hatred of divorce.

The twisted undone protection that comes in unfaithfulness.

The loss of God’s favor.

The witness of God watching over marriages and seeing a home full of the violence of divorce, the hatefulness of unfaithfulness.

I found it profound and interesting that as God was speaking to a nation, He was sorting out the husbands, who were to be the high priests of their families, and the reality of what unfaithfulness means to our relationship to God. Malachi lived in a culture that divorced wives, just because they wanted a newer model.

God wanted it stopped.

How does God see divorce?

As a hateful violent act against the ones

we are supposed to be protecting.

And God grieves.

Marriage is holy ground.

When Jesus is asked about it while on earth, He says it happens because of

the “hardening of our hearts”.

So, one of the things I think is of utmost importance in a marriage, is to watch

that your heart doesn’t harden against

your mate.

Don’t let bitterness gain a footing.

Keep communication open and fights finished.

Get help when you need to get help.

Invest in each other, and keep a check on your critical attitude.

Should hurtful sarcasm and snarky intimidations stand between you, you are risking a hard heart, a costly adultery

and a hateful divorce.

Violence to your home.

Now, if you were the one who didn’t commit adultery and did not want the divorce, please note that this does not apply ….to you.

You are deeply loved and God will get

you through what’s been done to you.

It likely won’t be in your timing or your way.

It will cost much shame, guilt, anger and pain, because those are part of sin.

But please don’t waste time thinking you are all to blame.

I’m sure the person leaving has hatefully filled you in, as you try and explain to confused children what’s happening,

while you don’t even understand.

I just don’t want us to forget:

Divorce is still a tragedy.

It’s still a terrible sign of hate.

Adultery is still horrendous,

no matter how you rename it, or how fabulous it looks on a movie screen.

That’s a lie. But also know:

Both are also forgivable sins.

If you have come to Christ after a

hateful divorce, God knows.

Keep growing in grace, and make right what you can, then move forward in faith.

God will be faithful to you.

But yes, while I know this is a hot topic,

less debatable and more acceptable

than ever, I’m speaking

to those who are Believers.

I’m saying what God said:

Be on your guard.

Do not be unfaithful to each other.

~AnnStewartPorter

[fluffy-does-essays]

Antisemitism Awareness Act Bill

You’ve probably heard about the Antisemitism Awareness Act, right? It’s been making waves recently. Its goal is to combat antisemitism, which is definitely a good thing. But some people, including myself, are concerned that it might lead to issues that go beyond just politics.

Here’s the deal. The term “Semitic” doesn’t only refer to Jewish people, even though that’s often what comes up when we look it up. It’s actually a term for a group of languages like Hebrew, Arabic, and Aramaic, and the people who speak them. But often, people use it to mean only Jewish people, which isn’t quite right and kind of puts other religious groups in the shadows. It’s kind of like how people use the word “Queer” to only refer to Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual folks, and forget about the other groups who are also part of that.

The Antisemitism Awareness Act uses a definition of antisemitism from the International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance. It’s a “working definition”, which means it’s not fixed and can be changed at any time. This could be used to prevent people from holding both the State of Israel, and also individuals from that state, accountable for their actions. And I’m not talking about holding them accountable out of hate, but rather when they do something wrong, like anyone else would be held accountable for. This includes the ongoing conflict that’s happening right now.

This could also lead to backlash against people who are also Semitic, like Palestinians and other communities. Just to be clear, this isn’t about being anti-Jewish. It’s about making sure we’re using words and laws in a way that’s accurate and fair.

Works Cited:

“Semitic.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, Link. “Working Definition of Antisemitism.” International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance, Link. “Afroasiatic languages.” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia, Link. “Antisemitism Awareness Act passed by House of Representatives. Here’s what the bill does.” MSN, Link. “The Antisemitism Awareness Act Will Make It Illegal To Criticize Israel on Campus.” Reason, Link. “Anti-Semitism Awareness Act Approved by U.S. House.” Daily Journal, Link. “Antisemitism Awareness Act passed by House of Representatives. Here’s what the bill does.” CBS News, Link. “House passes antisemitism bill with broad bipartisan support amid campus arrests.” NBC News, Link.

[hebrewbyinbal]

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[thetrenderchronicles]

Character Ethnicity Headcanons

Timothy Wright: Part Greek and Italian, is fluent in both languages, has learned ASL to talk with Brian. Tends to only swear when angry or annoyed. So...most of the time.

Brian Thomas: part Columbian, part Italian, small part Mexican, fluent in Spanish, Italian, and ASL. Has been known to switch between languages when angry and gets very colorful with his language.

Jay Merrick: one fourth Vietnamese, and is rusty with the language. He has been heard cursing people out in Vietnamese though. May or may not be taking Duolingo classes.

Alex Kralie: three fourths Russian and he despises when people try to mock the Russian accent. His Russian is also rusty, but he does remember the important words.

Maggie Martini: Italian and part Portuguese, fluent in Italian and Spanish. Knows some ASL (the swear words, definitely the swear words). Not as colorful as Brian but she has said sworn like a sailor.

Tala Foster: Filipino, knows Filipino, Tuwali, English, Spanish, French, German, and ASL. Will not hesitate to curse anyone out in any language. Is extremely colorful all the time. Even more than Brian. Has an accent.

Lyra Rogers: German and fluent. She prefers not to teach people the language just to confuse them, she has a noticeable but not heavy German accent. Sometimes she teaches people to say phrases but doesn’t say the actual meaning to mess with them.

Toby Rogers: German, and he is fluent in German. He teaches swear phrases and that's it. His language is his last secret he wants to keep. Plus, he likes talking to his siblings Lyra and Cody in German without anyone else knowing what they are saying.

Jessica Locke: Caucasian, knows some Hebrew and Latin. Has sworn a couple times but generally doesn't. She tries to keep things calm. But she will not hesitate to swear at the Operator.

Kate Millens: Half Japanese, fluent in Japanese and is selectively mute after being alone for so many years. She and Brian have communicated with ASL. Brian was one of the first to here her speak after she joined the group.

Amy Walters: half French, and she makes it known. She loves speaking French and her accent. She has all the tea on everyone and has a very colorful language when angry or during the time. Alex loves when she speaks French, no matter what she says.

Seth Wilson: Caucasian, knows a little of everyone's language. He taught himself so he could use it on his ToTheArk channel. After all, the Ark needs to know everything he can.

Sarah Reid: Caucasian, she's more fluent in French, Spanish, and Italian and has helped the Ark with her languages. She is kind and will always help people but won't hesitate to throw hands when someone insults her friends and family.

[an-atlas-or-other]

So I’ve seen a bunch of people annotating movies and stuff so I thought it’d be fun to do myself. Here we go, Battle of the Supersons (2022). I’m… worried.

Why does Krypton look like a green hellscape?

And why are we going through Superman’s origin story? I thought this was a supersons film

Oh that’s why

Does that mean Starro was the reason Krypton was destroyed in this universe?

Ooo comic book art

Martha and Johnathan Kent are dead?

Speaking of, they really can’t pick who lives and dies between them. I’ve seen versions where they’re both dead, where they both live, and in that old as balls Superman film I’m pretty sure they only killed John. The only combination I haven’t yet seen is one where only Martha dies

Jesus Christ Jon’s hair is so messy, it puts mine to shame

Oh here comes the theme of the movie

Why are they always out for video games, leave them alone

Not just of the year, Lois has won the Pulitzer??? Why didn’t they mention that instead

Okay so Jon clearly doesn’t have his powers yet

They’re on the farm? I thought they lived in the city?

COSPLAY LMAO

Yess hide the evidence boy

CLARK WHAT THE FUCK

His voice is so wrong and he looks so weird, everyone else has normal proportions and there he is using cartoon logic to have a Dorito shaped chest and a tiny ass head and legs

Father-son bonding, adorable

Oh nice shoes

Yeah he even looks weird as Superman also why is the ISS falling out of orbit

Nevermind it’s the Watchtower

Yeah let’s just ignore that that’s nothing like a debris entry hole (on that note, something jarringly similar happened with the Soyuz capsule on the real ISS a while ago and now like three astronauts are stranded there for another six months waiting for the replacement to get there, which is a weird coincidence)

Why does every version of Arrow look so different like seriously

I like his design though, he looks cool

Do they really announce who’s batting at baseball games? That’s so lame, no wonder he’s getting bullied

SWING MY GUY JUST SWING THE DAMN BAT

Clark’s packing some mad man-tit game

Dude where are you running to it’s your dad’s property for miles out

The boots pft

Jon’s so cute omg

Yes just let random people see your son flying with you in public Im sure that’s fine /sar

I would be going insane rn I would not be as elated as he is

Sideburns

Superboy’s taken? Does that mean Kon exists in this universe? Why isn’t Jon asking about him?

GOTHAM STINKS LMAO

Batman looks cool also Penguin has a ponytail and it doesn’t look as bad as I thought it would

The Cave looks awesome wow

Damian why are you so immature?

Rah’zz? RAH’ZZ??? THE OL’ RAH’ZZ’L DAHZ’LL?? NO it’s pronounced RAY’SH like from the Hebrew word resh do you really think the (most likely white, let’s be honest here) creators of the Al Ghuls knew about Arabic anything? They probably just went with Hebrew and said “eh, it’s close enough.”

Damian you’re so cruel

NURSING MY BAT-WOUNDS

Oh Cassie she’s so cute

The eye twitch

BAT COW

Small-town hick

So he did let him milk her (also its a bat-bucket with bat-milk- WAIT NO-)

Well at least South America exists in this universe

Batman and Superman look like mini figurines omg I want one

Nerrrrrrds with good grrrraaaaaaades

Ooo great burn Kent he really felt that one (I’m lying)

That’s mildly horrific

Well its better then that one fight scene in Batman v Robin which isn’t saying much but at least it’s average

Ooo long knife

He ded

Melvin don’t deserve shit

I love how scandalized Jon looks

Damian should have punched him

Starro’d Lois is kind of creepy

Should have done that earlier Einstein

Why does he know about STAR Labs? Actually his mom is Lois Lane nevermind

How’d he turn it if he can’t fly

Krypto?????

Well he can float now

Yeah, why did you come here?

Good boy

How’d their noses change so much between two generations

Why does Damian only talk in whispers it’s kind of weird

Jimmy is so cute 100/10

MONOLOGUES LMFAO

Oh he’s got his complete costume now

WHY WOULD YOU SEND THEM OFF WITHOUT TELLING THEM THAT SOME GRANDPAPS YOU ARE

That spaceship is so adorable why is everything so cute omg

Hacked? It’s your computer, you just looked it up (I bet he just said that to look cool)

Oh yeah Luthor’s the president for some reason I got it in my head that it was her father

Also his voice is so wrong again

“Nah you ticked me off you can die instead”

Awe Dami that’s sweet

She said bitch on live television

OH SURE SAY YOUR SON’S FULL NAME ON A NATIONAL ANNOUNCEMENT I BET THATS NOT GONNA COME BACK TO BITE YOU IN THE ASS

Poor Wally, ran straight into a wall

MMH looks awesome

I love how you can see the small differences in their fighting straight away

Awe Dami watching his friend’s back

Tall bat ears

That’s not how Kryptonite works but whatever at this point

I’m debating whether or not the writers even knew much about the comics to begin with at this point if they got something to basic wrong

That was an interesting editing choice

Also what happened to Alfred they didn’t even show if he got Hive Minded or what

Why does Damian’s hair stick up like that can he even put on the hood or is it just for decoration?

There’s a subtle but rather jarring change in how Mama Starro is animated and I’m pretty sure I’m the only one irked about it but still

Thats not how things fall out of orbit

Also the perspective makes the station look about the size of Argentina and how did no one notice this during production

Yas stab the president with the flag

There’s symbolism in there somewhere but I’m not bothered enough to dissect it

I would have written this “resigning to death” scene differently but it’s a kids movie so I’ll let it pass

I love how Batman’s face doesn’t change at all when he spoke to his own child (who almost fucking died)

Awesome but also nooo don’t bat it randomly into space throw it into the sun or something

How do all the adult men look so weird and then Bruce looks so… normal

OMG HIS HAIR IS COMBED BACK AND HES IN A SUIT THATS FUCKING HILARIOUS

Oh and now that Damian’s actually in full lighting you can see he’s been whitewashed (again)

At least it’s not as bad as Ian

That’s not how physics works but whatever

HAHAHA poor Jon

At least Damian’s got the perfect sort-of indestructible friend for him to bully

Overall, good movie. I enjoyed it thoroughly even if the story seemed a little off at times. Sometimes I wondered if the writers even knew much about the DC universe to begin with save for surface level knowledge. 7/10

[semper-legens]

58. The Sin Eater, by Megan Campisi

Owned: No, library Page count: 349 My summary: May Owens is just fourteen when she steals a loaf of bread, and is sentenced to be a sin-eater for the rest of her life. Invisible to the world, feared and shunned, May must live at the bottom of society and take on the sins of the city so that others can be free. But when she is summoned to court to hear the sins of a dying lady, she finds herself embroiled in a conspiracy far wider than she could have imagined... My rating: 4/5 My commentary:

This is an interesting one. I picked it up entirely based on its title, because sin-eaters are a history I know something about! The tradition of sin-eating was that a person would eat a meal, typically bread and beer, over the coffin of someone who had died in exchange for money. That person would in doing so take on the sins of the deceased person, allowing their soul to more quickly go to Heaven and their spirit to be at rest, while the sin-eater would be laden with the deceased's sins. Typically, the sin-eater would be a poor vagrant desperately in need of the money, so much that they risked their immortal soul for the needs of their mortal bodies. Campisi has stated that this book is not meant to be a reflection of the actual historical reality of sin-eaters, more an extrapolation of the concept - taking the idea of eating people's sins and expanding it into an elaborate system with different foods for different sins. Overall, this is a really interesting book, though I do have a few quibbles with it.

Our protagonist is May, a teenage girl sentenced to becoming a sin-eater after stealing a loaf of bread. As sin-eaters are not permitted to speak outside of the sin-eating ritual, she spends a lot of the book wordless, but that doesn't mean silent. The first person narration is told from her perspective and imbued with a lot of character. It was a really distinct voice, you always got a lot of her personality shining through. Her arc sees her struggling from a desperate vagrant to uncovering a mystery at the heart of the royal court, learning a sense of self-confidence in so doing. As a sin-eater she is reviled, but so too is she given a purpose and role in her society that is both lauded and vilified, commanding some fear while being seen as the lowest of the low. May comes to weaponise this, while she still struggles with seeing herself as a cursed creature. It's this dichotomy that really forms the core of the book's ethos, to my mind. Women are at once treated as angels and devils, and it is up to the individual how she copes with the stereotypes afforded to her by gender.

My issue with this book comes with its relationship to historicity and the worldbuilding inherent to it. See, in reflection of the fact that the author did not intend this to be a literal interpretation of sixteenth century England, this book is set in an ambiguous other place. People there are Anglish, their religion follows the Maker, the rival faith is the Eucharistian faith. Okay, that's fine, use a thinly-veiled version of sixteenth century England so you can build your imaginative take on the idea of sin-eating, that's fine. But the effort in worldbuilding seems to stop after that? There are still Jewish people, there's still a France, and the Hebrew and Greek languages exist unchanged. How difficult would it have been to call all of these things a slightly different yet still recognisable name? It's so weird that Campisi didn't seem to want to put in the effort to develop her ideas past England's shores, even when it would only have taken a moment to switch out France for Gaul. It's not a huge problem, the plot remains unchanged regardless, but it did bug me as I was reading.

The other quibble I had was that sometimes the book waxes into questionable language. We can't go a sentence about the old sin-eater to whom May is apprenticed without noticing how huge and big and fat she is. And, okay, I get that this is in contrast to the literally-starving May, but the exaggerated grotesqueness of this woman's body made me pretty uncomfortable. So too did the descriptions of May's vagrant friends, lepers and outcasts all, though in fairness this is likely more a way of representing what people of the time might have thought of people with facial and bodily deformities more than the author implying that said people are horrific. Still, it rubbed me up the wrong way.

Otherwise, however, I'd very much recommend this book to anyone interested in the subject matter. It's a gripping tale of deceit - the political intrigue is balanced well with May's character arc and ongoing development, though admittedly I was far more interested in the latter than the former. I had fun with it! Uh, insofar as 'fun' can be applied to a book about death and murder and such. Hey, I'm morbid, you knew this.

Next up, another of my morbid special interests!