#does this even mean anything i dont even know what was going on in my brain

[bladu-bladu]

I've lived in many places, moved many times, had to start over friendships again and again. Some people keep calling and you want to keep calling them; some people turn out to be only friends of proximity, and once you're no longer around each other, the friendship cools.

I have childhood friends that still live in that city and we are friends because once in three years i show up on their doorstep and say hey there im alive, and they say lets go out one of those days, and then i leave and we will see each other in a few years once again. I don't have their number and I don't want their number, because we dont have anything in common anymore, but we have been friends for decades because that's what we were when we last played together and it is enough to see them healthy and happy even if i dont know the particulars.

I had a friendship that lived on 6 month old message replies, and it was important and meaninful and i very much didnt care all that much about the time it took to answer, because if i said "im coming over next week" id have a spam of gushing and plans making and lets go there and there and do this and that and youre staying for how long and stay a few days at my house. And we would talk about everything and update each other on our lives and sometimes not talk at all, but just being around and realising that yes, we like each other still! was great. It is very strange to be making plans to visit and knowing they're not there anymore, they're not here anymore, but the urge to message is still strong, the friendship is still there, even thought they aren't.

I have a frienship that survived end of school, end of college, moving cities and states and a decade without seeing each other. And i asked for a place to stay and they said you can stay as long as you need. Live with me.

I have a friendship that started at work, and they said they feel inferior because oh you know so much about so many things, and i said you know just as much as i do, everytime you and our common friends talk, i know zero references, i dont know the people, the shows, the meaning, the implication, so who knows more than the other here? and i asked to be invited to their wedding and they started giggling. we have nothing in common besides our profession, and i wish to hold this person forever.

I've had friendships that i thought would survive distance but frizzled out. That i thought were meaningful, but were for (their) convenience. That i thought were real, but where only of proximity.

Maybe it's from the experience of having started over and over and over, but letting go of those that give you nothing but the taste of pain isn't the end of the world. The loneliness, the feeling of being unmoored and what do i do with my time that was theirs before fades away, and you find something else to occupy yourself with, you meet new people. Maybe you stay as acquaintances for years until you or they reach out. It does need courage, it does need work, but it is so very much worth it.

Also re: the fact it’s normal to have a period of time where you have no friends: sometimes this means no “real” friends aka still have people you know from work, school, family, neighbors, acquaintances, etc etc you interact with but are not close with and couldn’t go to for anything on any deeper level. But sometimes it actually does mean no friends. No social interaction, nobody to call, no other option, don’t talk to anyone for days, don’t know who would find out if you died. The thing is there really is coming back from both of those situations ofc it takes a good deal of work and can feel like pulling teeth to put yourself out there but god it pays off. You can always start over from scratch, and it’s true most people are just as lonely as you are

[wonziz]

I always loved everything about you

pairings : niki x female reader

Genre: enemies to lovers, angst (?), a little bit of fluff

warnings : childhood trauma, overworking, anxiety, skinship, kissing (lmk if i missed anything!)

- NOT PROOFREAD-

this is for my girlies out there who are struggling with the same thing. Always remember, thing will get easier. Dont always preassure yourseld okay? You can do it!! Im counting on yahhh<3💕 this might be sensitive to something people so if you are not comfortable in reading it, you can always skip, take care💗

𝐿ibary…🖇️

~Currently playing: i bet on losing dogs by mitski~

You have always hated niki to the core. And he hated you too… so as you thought.

- more after cut! -

It was a week after the finals, which means, its the week you got your results back. You were nervous and scared, you always had a fear of failure trying to make everything perfect, trying to always impress your parents. You always overeducated yourself from a young age, pushing yourself more and more. You never did it for yourself but always the people around you.

It was biology, one of your strongest yet weakest subjects. It was your favourite subject but sometimes, you didn’t score as well as you wanted too. You sat in your chair anxiously, waiting for your name to be called out. you watched as your classmates faces filled with joy as they saw thier result slip.

you were called by your teacher, you walked up towards her and took you’re exam paper.

you walked back to your seat, looking at the slip in your shaky hands. An 82 again. You knew you could do better. You knew you could at least have scored a 90 or more. you stared at the piece of paper, regret filling you up. As you thought the feeling couldn’t get worser, your enemy walked up to you smirking, “what did you get huh? Why is it bad? Wow thats a firs-“

You stood up cutting niki off, walking out of the classroom. Niki looked at you shocked, following you from behind.

You knew he was following you but you were angry to even care. You walked out of the school building to a secluded area behind the school. You squat down crying, crumpling the paper in your hand.

Niki stopped in his tracks when he saw you crying not knowing what to do. He walked towards you slowly squatting beside you. “Whats wrong…? Im sure you got a good grade right? Can… i have a look?” He asked gently, putting his hand over yours, taking the crumpled piece of paper out if your hand.

He stared at it in shock, you got an 82. Thats good, really good. He looked at you confused, why were you upset with this marks. Niki puts an arm around your shoulder but you pushed it away, “go away niki. Stop trying to care when you dont. You hate me”

Niki looked at you with in disbelief, him hating you? He had always had a crush on you, but he always pushed thoses feelings away. He cared for you, but was too much of a loser to admit it. He didn’t know you thought of him like that. “Me..? Hating you…? Since when? Y/n, i have always liked you. Since ages. Grades does not prove your worth… its who you are. Your world doesn’t revolve some stupid numbers and studies all the time, its about knowing that you did our best. yes we need to study and get good grades but we need to live a little from time to time. Take breaks and rest.”

you halted up to look at him before crying again. Niki’s heart cracked seeing you so vulnerable and upset. Almost immediately niki hugs you “sshh… its fine, im here… let it all out.”

He stayed by your side, patting your back. You asked, “why do you even like me? Im not a good person, im not even pretty”

“I like every about you y/n. And i mean every single thing. Your laugh, your eyes, your smile, your voice, your determination. You are gorgeous. You really are, Its so okay to fail and make mistakes… we just need to learn from it.”

You look up again, with a small smile in your face. “Thank you niki… i-“ you got cut off when niki cupped your face in his plams then placings his lips onto yours.

“shhh… no need to say thank you..i promise to always be by your side. Always.” he mumbled againts your lips.

the kiss was filled with care and love, and that was all you needed to know

Nanas love note💕 : heyyy<33 Anyways this is probably my saddest work ever. I decided to write this as to express my own feelings, and to those out there who are struggling with the same thing, dont worry, you are not alone. I hope you like it<3 remember you are not alone and if you need someone to talk too… you can always slide in my dms<3 i promise it will be a safe place for you to vent or express your feeling okay? I love you guys sooo much💞

Taglist: @sugarikiz @icyy-hoon @jaysng @amorek1m

@jakesangel @mrjypark @won-k1ss @nxzz-skz

@yuvany @jiiyen (send ask or comment to be added🤍)

[sturniolo04]

could you do another sturniolo little sister one? but maybe where she hasn’t come out to her brothers yet and she’s secretly dating madison beer and they catch her or find out somehow

sls!fwb!reader x fwb!Madison A/N: I hope you enjoy this it was definitely out of my normal for sure in terms of what I write, sorry it took me so long to get this completed. Also, if you don't like the preadded name in my stories, you can either add your own name or not read it; it's up to you- Charli

Dividers: @bernardsbendystraws

Layla and her brothers were always super close even though she is the youngest in the family and there was nothing you haven't told your brothers; you tell each other everything... except this one thing

That one thing being that you are gay and have been having a thing for you guys' best friend, Madison. It wasn't that you didn't trust them with this information, you just simply couldn't figure out how to tell them about this identity change and secret friends-with-benefit relationship you were currently journeying on. This is resulted in the shameful feeling of sneaking behind your brother's back and you knew you were going to have to tell them at some point and figuring out how you were going to do so.

"do we have to go to this party guys I kind of wanted to stay at home"

Layla groans out simply because she knew that madison would be there and being at a party like that wouldn't necessarily cover the sneaking around, I mean anything could happen anything.

"why wouldnt we"

chris shrugs as him and matt walk into your room where you and nick were since nick was helping you get ready against you will.

"i dont know its just not our scene"

you kind of lie it being not your scene.

"oh stop it will be fun plus you look good"

nick states as looks at your finished look in the mirror pulling your hair behind your shoulders.

'almost too good"

matt groans out going into protective mode before we even get to the party, little did they know. You let out a little huff in defeat just agreeing to go to the party and subtly hoping nothing bad happens.

"madison"

nick exclaims as you guys finally run into her at the party which was bound to happened.

"hey you guys how are you"

she greets hugging your brothers in a group hug. you stand there kind of awkwardly, blushing slightly at how good she looked tonight.

"yeah i feel like we havent seen you in a while"

matt states as nick and chris agree.

"yeah it definitely has been a minute but I mean i've-"

she trails off pushing some of her brown hair behind her ear showcasing her iconic hoop earrings you always loved on her. it was just something about how to complimented her face, skin tone and her brown doe eyes.

" hung out with layla"

she shyly states as you two make eye contact with each other as she softly smiling.

"oh yeah we have you know girl time"

you agree breaking eye contact with her looking everywhere else but her eyes.

"oh she is the favorite i see"

chris jokes as shoves your shoulder slightly.

"yeah she is"

madison giggles as she abruptly cuts herself off wanting to get you alone away from your brothers.

"im actually im going to steal her you wont be needing her anytime soon"

madison jokes with your brothers grabbing your hand pulling you away from the three.

you and madison a snuck off to random empty room in the house to get some time with you.

"finally"

madison giggles taking your hands in hers after closing the door.

"hi"

she softly whispers out giggling pushing some hair out of your way behind your ear. A pink tint rising on your face looking down at the carpeted floor.

"you look good"

you sigh out subtly biting your lip and looking into her eyes as you two begin lean in.

"yo where did madison and layla go"

chris questions matt and nick as he makes his way over to where they were sitting.

"i dont know they were somewhere"

matt shrugs ready to go home already.

"i think madison went upstairs but im not sure where layla went though"

nick states looking at his phone then up at his younger triplet brother.

"isnt madison sleeping over though lets go find him I'm honestly ready to go"

chris groans out as matt and nick stand up to follow him upstairs.

"same here im soo ready to go"

matt agrees as they begin to trek upstairs. They slowly make their way to the door not even thinking to knock before opening it.

"oh"

matt states shocked as you and madison pull away.

"i can explain"

you rush out.

"wait layla youre gay"

nick questions with his jaw dropped.

"ye-yeah"

you stutter out finally admitting it

"i just didnt know how to tell you guys I'm sorry"

you rush out again and nick comes up to you resting his hands on his shoulders.

"lay its okay we support you plus"

nick chuckles out

"we love you either way"

chris chimes in as him and matt make their way over to you as well as madison as she beings to rest her head on your shoulder.

"okay"

you sigh out.

"plus yall are cute or whatever"

matt jokes.

Taglist @mintsturniolo @dirtylittleheart333 @wh0resstuff

@stayingstromboli @spicymuffins03 @chaoswithus @ksturnz

@emely9274

[cup-o-noodlez]

people have been talking about dm lately and ive been needing to give it a reread. take this shit meme i made like, two years ago when i first read it lol.

[puppppppppy]

AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY

[sesamestreep]

“requiem for methuselah” crazy ass episode for many reasons. Kirk is being fully insane, like I don’t actually think, even controlling for how quickly and easily and readily he seems to fall in love with anybody at the slightest encouragement, that he’d go that bonkers for that android woman he just met while everyone on the ship was this close to dying, but that’s neither here nor there, because in the background you’ve got an equally but much more subtly insane episode for Spock, who extremely uncharacteristically admits to experiencing an emotion (or nearly experiencing, whatever) and that emotion is ENVY of all things. And then spends the rest of the episode warning Kirk away from this new love interest (something that doesn’t usually happen, even when Kirk has very inadvisable love interests) and is, in the end, the person who accurately identifies that Rayna’s competing love for Kirk and Flint is ultimately what overwhelms and destroys her with the most killer line in maybe history???

And then to wrap it up we get an equally uncharacteristic sort of denouement scene (TOS loooves to cut an episode off right after the actual climax, leaving little time for falling action or character reflection, or to stick a sitcom-y button on the end where the gang all smiles and laughs at their misadventures and everything resets to zero, which is not a criticism, it’s just the style of that era of tv, honestly) where Kirk is literally miserable over Rayna’s death (again, kind of unusual for a lot of his love interests, he tends to be able to move on pretty quickly) and Spock goes to see him and he falls asleep right in front of Spock (also odd) and then when Bones comes in to give the final word on Flint, Spock waves him off from waking the Captain (tender) and Bones gives him that awful speech about how it’s sadder that Spock can’t even imagine the love Kirk felt for this random android woman than it is that Kirk lost her in the first place (debatable but also rude) and how his great tragedy is that he can’t love at all like they can and how all he wishes is that Kirk could forget about all of this and move on. AND THEN, to have Bones leave and Spock go over to Kirk and very gently, tenderly, reluctantly touch him and put his hand to his forehead and tell him to forget and HAVE THAT BE THE END OF THE EPISODE??? What am I supposed to do with that??

[icewindandboringhorror]

boy in silly sitting positions compilation

[milfbrainrot]

i feel like i type so much more than is reasonable when i do talk to people but i also don't get to socialize a ton so i just have soooo many words in me and if i'm like, tired or short on time, it is so much harder to restrain to the already-pushing-it point i can sometimes manage ;-;

[phagodyke]

the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

[nonsensechemicals]

crying whenever i talk about Cookie9 because all my friends have these interesting and unique theories on them while i take everything too literally and they all just stare at me like “dude… uuugh we r TIRED” <-they dont actually say this they are very kind to me but i can Feel It

[jinxedshapeshifter]

I've been listening to Loser, Baby from Hazbin Hotel on repeat despite having a minimal interest in Hazbin Hotel and tbh I think Loser, Baby might go in the "songs to listen to if you need cheering up" playlist lol.

It's just such a funny song but also the message isn't horrible. I love that it starts off sounding like Husk is just being a dick to Angel Dust for the sake of being a dick but no, he has a point to make (although I will say that it definitely feels like Husk is intentionally making it seem like he's being a dick to be a dick just to get a rise out of Angel, especially in the show lmao). So here are my takeaways from it:

Because I vaguely know what Husk is like in terms of his personality overall, I'm pretty confident in saying that he was intentionally trying to get a rise out of Angel to prove a point. Genuinely watching Angel slowly lose his mind as Husk bullies him is hilarious lmao

The entire song is basically Husk trying to get Angel to accept himself as he is and realize he's not alone, because Husk and Angel's flaws and trauma don't have to completely destroy them.

Disney underutilized Keith David in The Princess and The Frog

Husk says "But letting walls down, it can sometimes set you straight" and I think that's one of the biggest takeaways from Loser, Baby. Sometimes (usually. always) opening up is the first step to recovery.

The message of Loser, Baby is very much "You're not alone and you should feel more than free to embrace and own your flaws" and I love it. Loser, Baby doesn't suggest that being a loser is a bad thing, but something to embrace. Husk's goal isn't to put down Angel Dust, it's to get him to embrace a part of himself he's grown to hate and tell him that being damaged doesn't mean he should give into hopelessness (hell, he even accepts the parts of Angel that Angel himself hates with no hesitation), and especially in the context of the episode Loser, Baby appears in it's not a bad message.

i love these two and i love this song and i love how loser, baby promotes embracing aspects of yourself you hate

[acerikus]

Someone being extremely annoying in the replies of my flowey and clover gif and I'm running out of patience 😭

[marsixm]

ive actually put myself in so many situations and seem to come out doing socially well, youd think at some point i could get it in my head im not irredeemably bad

[netherdevil]

unnormal vivilly dweller thoughts in my head

[peppermintpegis]

netflix one piece live action feels a little like fanfic in that it makes sure it hits all the important notes but doesnt do all the work to make them hit which works in fic where the reader is supposed to bring all the emotional story investment from the original but doesnt work in a multi million adaptation that is supposed to be able to stand on its own or even serve as an intro to the series. it even does this in service to have more koby and helmeppo gay moments in this essay i w

[glindyupland]

I just think it’s silly that so many people complain about Villain Amaya as “wasted potential” and that “we were robbed” like-

My pals, post canon fan fiction is right there. The desire to free her husband is right there. Either by touching an evil book while being too eager to remember the obsidian oil, or being possessed by contact (ie what she believes is true loves kiss) when trying to reason with him in the dungeon.

We don’t need a rewrite, we can have a continuation. Both can be true. Amaya is a complex character, she can handle it.