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lucky-clover-gazette · 5 months ago

Text

prince's gambit highlights & annotations

chapter 21 & final notes

warning: VERY LONG

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

He had been taken from his suite to a smaller cell and laid out on stone, his body covered by fine linen. Nineteen, thought Damen, and quiet.

the ‘and quiet’ is especially heartbreaking

When a servant had made to enter, Damen had bodily stopped him. ‘No,’ he said. ‘No one goes in.’ He had put a two-man guard on the door with those same orders, and cleared out the section—as he had done once before, at the tower. When he had been certain that Laurent had sufficient privacy, he had left to learn all he could about Charcy.

lamen hr complaint #3: preventing other people (servants) from doing their jobs.

also, i like how this again builds on what we’ve seen in previous chapters. damen knows laurent needs time alone to process and think, and he fights to give him that. and then he tries to do some helpful thinking of his own.

‘I’m not Aimeric.’

you tell him damen

‘You ever wonder what it would feel like to find out you’d spread for your brother’s killer?’ Jord looked around the small room. He looked at the place where Aimeric lay. ‘I think it would feel like this.’ Unbidden, remembered words rose up inside him. I don’t care. You’re still my slave tonight. Damen pressed his eyes closed. ‘I wasn’t Damianos last night. I was just—’

it’s all coming together!! all the things i’ve been analyzing!!

also jord seriously laurent is doing this emotional damage to himself, damen’s just along for the ride

‘Just a man?’ said Jord. ‘You think Aimeric thought that? That there were two of him? Because there weren’t. There was only ever one, and look what happened to him.’

but… i think he was conflicted, and felt split. hence the “i’m sorry jord” and killing himself. and “what happened to him” implies a passivity that is patently false. aimeric was more like damen and laurent, psychologically, than jord. who is—sorry jord—honestly just too simple to be dealing with these ridiculous people

He had put those soldiers on the door to bar the way to those men seeking Laurent out for some trivial matter, or for any matter, because when Laurent wanted to be alone, no one should suffer the consequences of interrupting him. The taller soldier addressed him. ‘Commander, no one has entered in your absence.’ Damen’s eyes passed over the doors again. ‘Good,’ he said. And he pushed the doors open.

i LOVE this moment. the subtle humor of it—“when he wants to be alone, nobody should suffer his wrath” to “i’m going in,” because damen knows he can handle laurent’s bitching and that he shouldn’t be alone for too long

...even the table was replenished, with platters of fruit and pitchers of water and of wine...

guy whose job it is to communicate with the fort’s kitchen: yeah uh, can i get a ‘sorry you were disowned, usurped, gifted a severed human head, and then like five minutes later you discovered a suicide’ fruit basket for the prince

‘Come to say goodbye?’ said Laurent.

no you fucking idiot. let yourself be loved.

‘I’m sorry. I know what Nicaise meant to you.’ ‘He was my uncle’s whore,’ said Laurent. ‘He was more than that. You thought of him as—’ ‘A brother?’ said Laurent. ‘But I do not have terribly good luck with those. I hope you are not here for a mawkish display of sentiment. I will throw you out.’

laurent is trying so hard to take back control from this person who so recently saw him in such an intimate context. refusing to believe that he could continue to show damen vulnerability, and it would make him stronger

‘Then you’ll kill them like you killed Nicaise,’ said Damen. ‘By dragging them into this endless, childish bid of yours for your uncle’s attention that you call a fight.’ ‘Get out,’ said Laurent. He had gone white. ‘Is the truth hard to hear?’ ‘I said get out.’ ‘Or do you claim you’re marching to Charcy for some other reason?’

damen calling him on his bullshit! yes!! i love the tenderness between them here, in the pain and the compassion. tenderness is both. they can’t love each other without hurting each other (because lies), they can’t hurt each other without loving each other. there is some twisted romance in understanding someone and being understood so thoroughly that you have the keys to loving and hurting each other in ways no one else can. it’s a very compelling and intimate dynamic, although i am glad that they eventually figure out how to love each other without causing each other pain.

‘You need to beat him at his own game? You want him to see you do it? At the expense of your position and the lives of your men? Are you that desperate for his attention?’ He let his eyes rake up and down Laurent’s form. ‘Well, you have it. Congratulations. You must have loved it that he was obsessed enough with you that he killed his own boy to get at you. You win.’ Laurent took a step back, an almost-swaying motion of a man in the grip of nausea. He stared at Damen, his face hollowed. ‘You don’t know anything,’ Laurent said then, in a cold, terrible voice. ‘You don’t know anything about me. Or my uncle. You’re so blind. You can’t see what’s—right in front of you.’

okay damen you’re completely off-base with that one, but at least your worst-case selection on the dialogue tree has shocked laurent into being more angry at you than at the regent. which, if that was the point… well-played, but also Watch Out

Laurent’s sudden laugh was low and mocking. ‘You want me? You’re my slave?’ He felt himself flush. ‘That’s not going to work.’

and just as expected (?) laurent turns his wrath on a new target. performing cruelty, like he always does when he’s been justifiably called out

‘You want to hear the truth about my uncle? I’ll tell you,’ said Laurent, a new light in his eyes. ‘I’ll tell you what you couldn’t stop. What you were too blind to see. You were in chains while Kastor was cutting down your royal family. Kastor and my uncle.’ He heard it, and he knew not to engage. He knew, and a part of him was aching at what Laurent was doing, even as he heard himself say, ‘What does your uncle have to do with—’

so damen is subjecting himself to this on purpose. they are so messy. but it’s going to work

‘You didn’t guess it was Kastor? You poor dumb brute. Kastor killed the King, then took the city with my uncle’s troops. And all my uncle had to do was to sit back and watch it happen.’ He thought of his father, in a sick bed ringed with physicians, his eyes and cheeks hollowed out, and the room thick with the smell of tallow and of death. He remembered his sense of powerlessness, watching his father slip away, and Kastor, so solicitous, kneeling by his father’s side. ‘Did you know about this?’ ‘Know?’ said Laurent. ‘Everyone knows. I was glad. I just wish I could have seen it happen. I wish I could have seen Damianos when Kastor’s hire-swords came for him. I would have laughed in his face. His father got exactly what he deserved, to die like the animal he was, and there was nothing any of them could do to stop it happening. Then again,’ said Laurent, ‘maybe if Theomedes had kept his cock in his wife instead of sticking it in his mistress—’ That was the last thing he said, because Damen hit him. He drove his fist into Laurent’s jaw with all the force of his weight behind it. Knuckles impacted on flesh and bone and Laurent’s head snapped sideways even as he hit the table behind him hard, sending its contents scattering. Metallic platters crashed against tile, a mess of spilt wine and strewn food. Laurent clutched the table with the arm that he’d flung out instinctively to stop his fall.

a couple things to note here:

goddamn laurent. dude.

but at least he remembered to keep up the lie in his uncontrolled spite-filled monologue

veretian heterophobia/anti-bastardry on full display

not the fruit plate…

my ex wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better

Damen was breathing hard, his hands clenched into fists. How dare you talk that way about my father. The words were on his lips. His mind pulsed and throbbed.

hey damen, remember a few chapters ago when you were thinking about how you didn’t want to be like your father? not that kind of king? interesting

Laurent pushed himself up and gave Damen a look glittering with triumph, even as he dragged the back of his right hand across his mouth, where his lips were smeared with blood.

he’s insane. amazing character. 10/10

The doors behind him opened, and Damen knew without turning around that the sound had summoned the soldiers into the room. He didn’t take his eyes off Laurent. ‘Arrest me,’ said Damen. ‘I have raised hands to the Prince.’ The soldiers hesitated. It was the just response to his actions but he was—or had been—their Captain. He had to say again, ‘Do it.’ The darker-haired soldier stepped forward and Damen felt the grip take him. Laurent set his jaw. ‘No,’ said Laurent. And then, ‘It was provoked.’ Another hesitation. It was clear that the two soldiers did not know what to make of what they had walked into. The air of violence was heavy in the room, where their Prince stood in front of a ruined table, with blood welling from his lip. ‘I said let him go.’ It was a direct order from their Prince, and this time it was obeyed.

LAMEN HR COMPLAINT #4. UNNAMED SOLDIERS. i don’t even know how to label this one. but it definitely justifies a complaint. one of my favorite lamen hr complaints in the entire series

‘No,’ he said. ‘You can’t go to Charcy. I need to convince you of that.’ Laurent’s laugh was a strange, breathless sound. ‘Didn’t you hear anything that I just said to you?’ ‘Yes,’ said Damen. ‘You tried to hurt me, and you have. I wish you would see that what you have just done to me is what your uncle is doing to you.’ He saw Laurent receive that like a man at the very ends of his endurance being given another hit. ‘Why,’ said Laurent, ‘do you—do you always—’ He stopped himself. The rise and fall of his chest was shallow.

laurent at his weakest and most vulnerable makes my heart ACHE

‘I can’t.’ It was a raw admission. ‘I can’t think.’ The words were torn out of him. Wide-eyed in the silence, Laurent said them again in a different voice, his blue eyes dark with the exposure of the truth. ‘I can’t think.’ ‘I know,’ said Damen. He said it softly. There was more than one admission in Laurent’s words. He knew that too.

this made me tear up the first time i read it. laurent’s reaction here comes scarily close to some personal stuff for me, except i didn’t have anyone to say “i know” and comfort me. i’m glad laurent isn’t alone. it’s a little self-indulgent to imagine that someone could be loved like this in real life, but at least it happens on the page. and it took a real person to write it happening on the page—it didn’t just show up there on its own. that matters, and it’s part of why i find gratification in engaging intellectually and emotionally with fiction.

‘Don’t go,’ said Laurent, quietly. ‘I’m just clearing my head. I already told my escort I wouldn’t need them until morning,’ said Damen. And there was another awful silence, as Damen realised what Laurent was asking him. ‘No. I don’t mean—forever—just—’ Laurent broke off. ‘Three days.’ Laurent said it as though producing from the depths the answer to a painstakingly weighed question. ‘I can do this alone. I know I can. It’s only that right now I can’t seem to . . . think, and I can’t . . . trust anyone else to stand up to me when I’m . . . like this. If you could give me three days, I—’ He forcibly cut himself off. ‘I’ll stay,’ said Damen. ‘You know I’ll stay for as long as you—’ ‘Don’t,’ said Laurent. ‘Don’t lie to me. Not you.’ ‘I’ll stay,’ said Damen. ‘Three days. After that, I ride south.’

laurent not wanting damen to promise anything more than three days is so painful to read, but it also rings true. laurent knows he couldn’t stand to see that promise broken (“not you”), and he also knows that he can’t keep his lie from damen forever. laurent probably even thinks, despite everything between them, that damen might not even want him after he figures it out. but he needs him here now, in order to survive this and clear his head. so three more days.

damen agreeing to ride south in three days is a mercy, and i think also probably a lie. but he knows it’s what laurent wants and needs to hear, and that laurent is incredibly vulnerable at the moment. damen gives him what he (laurent) thinks he needs (damen leaving), while also giving him what he actually needs (damen staying), for three days at least.

Laurent nodded. After a moment, Damen came back to rest against the table beside Laurent. He watched Laurent find his way back to himself. Eventually, Laurent began to talk, the words precise and quite steady. ‘You’re right. I killed Nicaise when I left it half done. I should have either stayed away from him, or broken his faith in my uncle. I didn’t plan it out, I left it to chance. I wasn’t thinking. I wasn’t thinking about him like that. I just . . . I just liked him.’ Underneath the cold, analytical words, there was also something bewildered.

really good depiction of someone coming back from a panic attack/breakdown. again, it hits. the “coming back to himself,” the way he slides back into steady precise assessment of the situation… yeah

It was awful. ‘I should never have—said that. Nicaise made a choice. He spoke up for you because you were his friend, and that is not something you should regret.’

oh this whole thing kind of foreshadows how laurent sacrifices himself for damen in book 3, huh? he does the exact opposite of what damen is telling him here, except instead of nicaise making a choice it's damen. damen makes the choice to care about laurent, over and over again, and laurent can’t regret that FOR him. laurent shouldn’t feel like he needs to free damen of his burden of caring, or protect damen from the consequences of his own attachment. but laurent is going to try to do exactly that, in book 3, especially with his “failure” of nicaise in mind. and he’s kind of doing it now, too, by insisting that damen can’t stay with him after charcy.

laurent shows love by caring for others in the ways he knows how to care for himself. it’s a silly parallel to make, but it’s like how he brought damen a towel after the sex scene, even though damen didn’t have the urge to be clean that laurent so pressingly experienced. laurent knows how to suffer alone and how to strategically use his abilities to survive. he channels this experience to serve the people and causes he loves, even if the gesture is misunderstood or it's done at his own expense.

back to book 3: damen attacks the regent in laurent's honor. laurent submits himself to the regent's retaliation in his place. not only because he loves damen and wants to protect him, but also because he blames himself for getting damen into the situation at all. because he allowed himself to be loved by damen, damen was in danger. laurent regrets that on damen's behalf and tries to suffer the consequences instead. something he hadn't thought to do, or been able to do, for nicaise.

laurent does have a bleeding heart—so much so, that he can’t possibly wear it on his sleeve. he believes that he can't help anyone, can't maintain precious stability, if he has made himself vulnerable to love and harm alike. what he does best is survive, use others, and allow himself to be used. his hypervigilance ensures that this is all under his own careful control, even when it appears otherwise. because when laurent loses control, he gets hurt and hurts others. see the regent taking advantage of him after auguste's death for an example of the former, and aimeric's suicide for an example of the latter.

laurent has a private and complicated code of ethics and honor, based on compassion for the disempowered and a thirst for justice. his apparent ruthless pragmatism is part performance, part necessary adaptation, and part realistic means of reaching those idealistic ends. as a disempowered victim of repeated injustices, he is sensitive in a way a person with different experiences might not be. sometimes that means he lashes out, like with aimeric. but in his best moments, it means that he fights and cares with unmatched fierceness. and with someone like damen at his side, and an eventual peaceful life in which he can reflect, laurent can grow to harness that passion without hurting others or himself in the process.

(my note-taking drifted away from text analysis here, and turned into a more personal meditation on real life and fiction. honestly i'd recommend revisiting the original quote to remember what the hell i'm even talking about. please skip to the next quote if you're not interested.)

i don't know if people like damen really exist, or if people like damen even should exist. after all, he puts up with a lot, way more than would be considered healthy or safe by modern standards or even canon standards. maybe damen's existence as a character is purely wish fulfillment for people who relate to laurent. it's probably unreasonable to expect to be loved by someone so patient and devoted. the reality is, while the kernels of what make this ship resonant and desirable may be found in a real relationship, no real relationship will be quite as resonant or desirable as an intentionally-written work of fiction.

the following sentiment is the most personal i intend to get in these notes. it's not super related to the book and it isn't necessarily relevant to anyone but me. but it does create a smoother transition to the next paragraph, so i'll keep it in.

i haven’t had the privilege of experiencing romantic love that hasn’t hurt. and while love and hurt come hand-in-hand, i have historically been offered very little comfort or consideration by people i have trusted with the most vulnerable parts of myself. which means that i am very well-practiced in caring for myself, alone.

i don't know if damens are real, and i don't want to count on it. i'll care for me instead, because i believe that i'm worth caring for.

i think that firm belief, that i am worth caring for, has a lot to do with the way i interact with stories. that's the reason why i find analyzing resonant fiction like capri so personally gratifying. even though the characters aren't real, the fact that their stories have been told at all makes me feel less alone. because someone had to care enough about it, about them, to bother to write it all down. real stories have this effect too, if resonant—history or poetry or memoir, the same principle still applies.

through analyzing the stories that i care so deeply about, i am tricked into believing that i owe myself the same compassion and consideration that i show the people within them. because if i relate to a character, and i want them to be happy and loved, then that must mean that i want me to be happy and loved too. and beyond projection, i get to learn things about people who aren't like me at all, and countless worlds outside my own. in that respect, thinking about stories helps me strengthen my own moral code and widen my perspective. and honestly, more than anything else, it just feels good to do something with it all.

... which is why i am doing this, for free, for hours, for fun.

‘He spoke up for me because he didn’t think my uncle would hurt him. None of them do. They think he loves them. It has the outward semblance of love. At first. But it isn’t love. It’s . . . fetish. It doesn’t outlast adolescence. The boys themselves are disposable.’

something something, akielion slavery. keeping people in a permanent state of arrested development, stripping them of their ability to advocate for themselves like adults, making them into interchangeable objects who unconditionally love their position and trust their masters. but it isn’t love, nor is it fetish—it’s grooming, and it's evil. just like the regent, with every single one of his victims.

laurent knows damn well that it's far worse than just fetish. he knows it for the slaves and for the regent's young victims. but he can't verbalize it here, because that would mean admitting (privately, implied) that evil has been done to himself as well.

i don’t think laurent views himself as innocent in the same way he viewed nicaise, or the other victims, or the akielion slaves. his desire for justice is not on his own behalf, and it never really has been. in various instances, it’s been about justice for auguste, damen, jord, and nicaise… but never for laurent himself. to laurent, it’s evil when the regent hurts all of the other boys—but when it was him, it was only fetish. and laurent understands that to the regent, with any of his victims, it is only fetish. not love or evil. even though the regent's boys believe it's love, even though laurent can rationally recognize that it's evil, it doesn't matter when the regent is still in power. and on a personal level, regarding his own experiences with his uncle, some part of laurent is still groomed into thinking he specifically deserves abuse.

Damen knew better than to reach out, or to try to touch him.

i love seeing moments like these. comfort isn't one-size-fits-all.

He watched Laurent’s face, the flickering of some internal truth behind the careful lack of all expression. ‘He was on my side,’ said Laurent. ‘But in the end, the only person on his side was him.’

don’t make the same mistake, laurent, assuming that damen isn’t on your side. oh fuck he can’t hear me.

‘You liked him.’ ‘My uncle cultivated the worst in him. He still had good instincts sometimes. When children are moulded that young, it takes time to undo. I thought . . .’ Softly, ‘You thought you could help him.’

see previous analysis re: laurent, grooming, regent, etc.

It was with a shock that he felt the touch of Laurent’s fingers against the back of his wrist. He thought it a gesture of comfort, a caress, and then he realised that Laurent was shifting the fabric of his sleeve, sliding it back slightly to reveal the gold underneath, until the wrist-cuff he had asked the blacksmith to leave on was exposed between them. ‘Sentiment?’ said Laurent. ‘Something like that.’ Their eyes met and he could feel each beat of his heart. A few seconds of silence, a space that lengthened, until Laurent spoke. ‘You should give me the other.’ Damen flushed slowly, heat spreading from his chest over his skin, his heartbeats intrusive. He tried to answer in a normal voice. ‘I can’t imagine you’d wear it.’ ‘To keep. I wouldn’t wear it,’ said Laurent, ‘though I don’t believe your imagination is having any difficulty with the idea.’

foreshadowing this in book 3, except it happens in the most petty insane way possible

Damen let out a soft, unsteady breath of laughter, because he was right. For a while they sat together in comfortable silence. Laurent had mostly returned to himself, his posture more casual, his weight leaned back on his arms, watching Damen as he sometimes did. But he was a new version of himself, stripped back, youthful, a little quieter, and Damen realised he was seeing Laurent with his defences lowered—one or two of them, anyway. There was an untried, fragile feeling to the experience.

‘I should not have told you in the manner I did about Kastor.’ The words were quiet. Red wine was seeping into the tiles of the floor. He heard himself ask it. ‘Did you mean what you said? That you were glad.’ ‘Yes,’ said Laurent. ‘They killed my family.’

i love that he doesn’t lie here. because yeah.

The truth was so close in this room that it seemed for a moment that he would say it, say his own name to Laurent, and the closeness of it seemed to press down on him, because they had both lost family.

honestly cannot tell if it would have made things better or worse for him to tell the truth now. guess we'll never know

Because throw Laurent together with Damianos, and either one would kill the other, or, if Damen kept his identity concealed and they somehow managed to form an alliance . . . if he helped Laurent instead of hurting him, and Laurent, out of the deep-buried sense of fairness that existed within him, helped him in turn . . . if the foundation of trust was built between them so that they might become friends, or more than friends . . . if Laurent ever decided to make use of his bed slave . . . He thought about the Regent’s suggestions to him, sly, subtle. Laurent could benefit from a steadying influence, someone close to him with his best interests at heart. A man with sound judgement, who could help guide him without being swayed. And the constant, pervasive insinuation: Have you taken my nephew? My uncle knows that when I lose control, I make mistakes. It would have given him a perverse kind of pleasure to send Aimeric to work against me, Laurent had said. How much greater the twisted pleasure to be gleaned from this?

regent thought he was being clever but he actually just preordered his own defeat

‘I’ve listened to everything that you said to me,’ Laurent was saying. ‘I’m not going to rush off to Charcy with an army. But I still want to fight. Not because my uncle threw down a challenge, but on my own terms, because this is my country. I know that together we can find a way to use Charcy to my advantage. Together we can do what we cannot do apart.’

“together we can do what we can’t do apart” THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING

also warning, i forget the details of laurent’s whole charcy plan. so there’s probably context where i’m missing it. but i’m still looking out for double meanings etc

(note from post-reading sam: yeah you're about to see me realizing and processing things in real time, just hang in there i figure it out eventually)

‘My uncle plans everything,’ said Laurent, as though reading Damen’s thoughts. ‘He plans for victory and he plans for defeat. It was you who never quite fit . . . You’ve always been outside of his schemes. For everything that my uncle and Kastor planned,’ said Laurent, as Damen felt himself grow cold, ‘they had no idea what they did when they gifted me with you.’

i love that he says this, knowing who damen is. it just makes me happy. i think laurent is already Scheming at this point, and probably weighing the ways he can blindside damen or screw him over. “together we can do things…” doesn’t necessarily mean that they can make it happen as a team. damen is a useful piece to play strategically, though, and that way of regarding him means laurent conveniently doesn’t have to think about the intimate night they just shared or the two people who just died tragically who both parallel his own experiences

In a fort full of activity, he knew himself a game piece, and was only beginning to be able to glimpse the scope of the board.

truer than you think. although UGH i wish i could remember the exact sequence, i’m not sure if laurent is scheming to screw him over yet. i kinda forget how we arrive at “hello lover” because laurent knows damen is who he is, but i don’t think he’s being dishonest with his feelings. maybe it’s just that, once the reality is undeniable, laurent feels regret and shame about loving his brother’s killer, and massively course-corrects in the opposite direction by being cruel. maybe he doesn’t want to appear weak or compromised for having engaged with the akielion prince in the way he did, so he has to pretend that it wasn’t real. also he gets tortured, which probably doesn’t help. and the plot has to keep plotting and the conflict has to keep conflicting.

did laurent see charcy coming prior to nicaise? again, i forget. but i’m keeping an eye out for it now. i think his plans are all being made last-second, but i could be wrong.

(post-reading sam again: i was wrong.)

Jord was right. He had owed Laurent the truth, and he hadn’t given it to him. And now he knew what the consequences of that choice might be. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to regret what they had done: last night had been bright in a way that resisted tarnishing. It had been right. His heart beat with the feeling that the other truth must somehow change to make it right, and he knew that it wouldn’t.

yeah ngl damen i get why you didn’t say it but if i was laurent i’d be pissed. like i wonder if laurent was waiting the whole time for damen to just Say It, and the fact that he didn’t made damen lose the moral arbitration he didn’t even know he was subject to. THAT would explain laurent’s attitude at charcy. this was a test and damen failed. and while they both should just fucking talk to each other and laurent is insane for keeping this bit going for so long, i do understand why he’d feel disappointed and betrayed by damen’s lack of honesty, especially given the other ways damen has proven himself loyal and true. so it’s easier for laurent to use him and screw him over, in a way, because he can tell himself that damen’s just been using and screwing him too.

He imagined himself nineteen again, knowing then what he knew now, and he wondered if he would have let that long-ago battle fall to the Veretians—let Auguste live. If he would have ignored his father’s call to arms altogether, and instead found his way to the Veretian tents and sought out Auguste to find some common ground. Laurent would have been thirteen but in Damen’s mind’s eye he would have found him a little older, sixteen or seventeen, old enough that Damen’s nineteen-year-old self could have begun, with all the exuberance of youth, to court him.

damen: i think i’ve changed enough as a person that if i went back in time, i’d make a different ethical choice about the life or death of another person. and that’s cool and all, but ALSO i’d get to court laurent !!!!! :D

And if he couldn’t give Laurent the truth, he could use everything else he had to give Laurent a definitive victory in the south.

i mean you still could. you very much still could. you can have a kingdom AND this, you just have to communicate with laurent. but go and do the other thing i guess.

to be fair, damen doesn’t know that laurent knows. i’m being too harsh. if laurent truly didn’t know, this would make a lot more sense. the truth would make him far too upset to fight with a clear mind, and damen understands that laurent is more likely to screw up when he loses his mind. damen wants laurent to be safe and to win, so he withholds the truth that could destroy him. to a first-time reader, it makes total sense, and it keeps the tension going. i think that’s partially why i didn’t anticipate the twist—so much of the tension hinges on something being true (laurent doesn’t know), so it made the most sense to me that something with this much attention placed on it MUST be true. but it’s perhaps even more interesting and compelling to know on a re-read that it’s not true, that laurent does know, because it gives me a lot of things to re-contextualize.

the only downside is that it’s also just incredibly frustrating, now that i’m not on board emotionally with damen and the lie that creates the tension here. that doesn’t mean the writing is bad, but the feeling i get reading it is VERY different from how i felt the first time around. oh my god is that how laurent has felt this whole time. like he’s taking part in his own love story but he can’t fully actively buy into it or participate, because he knows something that jeopardizes the love story so dramatically that he can’t call it a love story at all. oh my god.

like, damen is in a romance story. there are politics and drama and adventure, but that is main genre of his narrative. he always tends to focus on romantic aspects of a situation. and the first time we read the series, we only perceive their love story from damen’s pov. we can’t even begin to guess what’s going on with laurent, because we think he’s clueless about this big lie, and so we kind of just make do with his dialogue and damen’s observations.

but laurent isn’t just the love interest in damen’s narrative. in laurent's narrative, he is the main character of a fucking psychological thriller, and has been this whole time. king’s rising is where damen (and the reader) finally get a sense of the genre/reality laurent has been living in thus far, because the truth comes out and laurent can now make it damen’s problem. but it's always been happening, in laurent's head.

There had been a silence, until Laurent had said, ‘You were right. I haven’t been thinking about it like this.’ ‘Like what?’ said Damen. ‘Like war,’ said Laurent.

it's the game he likes. not war

Now they faced one another on the dais and words rose to Damen’s lips, personal words. But what he said was, ‘Are you sure you want to leave your enemy in charge of your fort?’

do they ever say “i love you” on the page? i seem to recall an absence of that—which i don’t exactly mind in their case, because it’s pretty obvious they love each other by the end, and so much is left between the lines with them anyway. but i do wonder if damen had the urge to say some variation of the sentiment here, before chickening out and going for a snarky comment instead

They gazed at one another. It was a public goodbye, in full view of the men. Laurent extended his hand. He did it not, as a prince might, for Damen to kneel and kiss, but as a friend. There was acknowledgement in the gesture, and as Damen took his hand, in front of the men, Laurent held his gaze. Laurent said, ‘Take care of my fort, Commander.’ In public, there was nothing he could say. He felt his grip tighten slightly. He thought of stepping forward, of taking Laurent’s head in his hands. And then he thought of what he was, and all he now knew. And he forced himself to release his grip.

foreshadowing book 3. they can’t interact with each other with the same ease, intimacy, and privacy that they had as “master” and “slave” when they’re both recognized as capable leaders in the public eye.

(they fail miserably at this, though, especially in early-to-mid book 3 after the reveal. like they really just put themselves in a lose-lose situation: they “can’t” be in love or trust each other, but they are also so obsessed with each other that what they end up doing in the public eye is ten times weirder and less convenient for everyone else than if they just made up and were in love as well as commanding an army.)

Laurent was nodding to his attendant, mounting his horse. Damen said, ‘A lot depends on timing. We have a rendezvous in two days. I—Don’t be late.’ ‘Trust me,’ said Laurent with a single bright glance, straightening his horse out with the tug of a rein in the moment before the order was called, and he and his men moved out.

okay, so here’s what’s actually going on with the war shit, because i’m determined to keep track of it this time instead of just focusing on the emotions.

laurent is riding out to fortaine, which is the fort that guion runs, and the likely source of the regent’s promised troops at nearby charcy. this is a good plan because laurent taking fortaine fucks up the regent’s plan AND it gives laurent access to the resources necessary to continue fighting.

damen, meanwhile, will literally hold down the fort here in ravenel. laurent trusts him to do this. laurent has taken most of the soldiers, leaving damen with not many men if there was to be a surprise attack here.

they have an important rendezvous set in two days’ time, although i’m unsure where exactly they’ve agreed to meet. i’m going to assume fortaine or charcy, not back here in ravenel. i think since damen says “don’t be late,” the intention is for them both to show up at charcy with their men—for damen to leave ravenel in 1.5 days after preparing the fighters as best as he can—and fight the regent’s forces with their combined army. so it makes sense that damen would say "don't be late," because if he showed up alone with his men, they'd probably get slaughtered.

SO. this is what i remember actually happening:

laurent does not, in fact, show up for the rendezvous in two days, leaving damen to handle charcy alone

instead, laurent takes fortaine and just kind of chills there. damen eventually shows up after winning charcy, leading to the "hello lover" scene

laurent explains the situation to damen as if he (laurent) intentionally stood him up, as retribution for the truth damen has been keeping from him this whole time

BUT laurent is leaving out that he ended up being kidnapped and tortured by guion before killing a man with a chair and just barely managing to take the fort. or something. and govart is there too.

so my question is, does laurent at this exact moment already mean to stand damen up? or is the "hello lover" thing a way for him to cover up the fact that he got captured and tortured and almost lost everything? both things are probably true, which would kind of prove damen's point from the end of this book: laurent makes riskier choices without his input, and there are certain risks laurent shouldn't take because his life and safety matter. but mr "probably" laurent doesn't value his own life and safety very much, especially not if there's a possibility of winning the game. if laurent doesn't allow damen to look out for him, laurent is going to endanger himself.

my guess is that it's both: laurent fully intends to stand damen up at this point, but doesn't anticipate the consequence of his own manipulative bullshit. blindsiding damen will result in laurent's torture, capture, and near-death. despite technically winning the insane mind game against the damianos in his head, laurent will still need to save face with the damen in his tent. because he knows damen was right, and he hates it.

definitely revisiting this note when i read the "hello, lover" scene to see how i did ;)

addition to the note from sam reading two pages ahead: at some point laurent has also gotten akielions involved because he knows their presence will force damen to out himself as damianos. like he’s showing his hand in a way that screws damen over but also doesn’t necessarily get him killed, and most absurdly, STILL KEEPS THE LIE THAT LAURENT DOESN’T KNOW HE’S DAMIANOS GOING, making damen even more guilty and paranoid, and a first-time reader even more compelled by the tension. it happens as the cliffhanger for this book and before charcy, so the events at charcy stay open-ended to a first-time reader.

i hope we find out eventually if laurent planned all of this after they fucked, or if it had already been set in motion before and he just committed to the bit he’d already started. would the fucking have made a difference? probably not. laurent and damen are a cat and a mouse, but laurent thinks they’re a figurative cat and mouse in a psychological thriller who intentionally torment each other, and damen thinks they’re a cat and mouse in a disney movie who fall in love despite their differences. the rare moments where they step into each other’s genres are so rewarding and impactful because they’re so rare. if it happened more often, and during every pivotal moment like this one, it wouldn’t be nearly as powerful when they finally figure out their shit. “a kingdom or this” is an interesting tagline because of the “or.” if it was “and” from the beginning of the story, there wouldn’t be a story to tell. certainly not one as well-written and unique as this. pacat really is a master of writerly restraint, and i could learn a lot from her approach to story construction.

Because it was not possible, no matter what was said, to completely trust Laurent, the morning was a thin skein of tension, drawn tight.

lmao

‘Akielons are marching on us,’ he expected the runner to say, and he did, but then he said, ‘I’m to give this to the fort Commander,’ and he was urgently pressing something into Damen’s hand. Damen stared at it. Behind him, the Akielon army was approaching. In his hand was a hard loop of metal set with a carved gemstone, the etching a starburst. He was looking at Laurent’s signet ring.

oh my god he’s such a BITCH. this has been in motion since the start, and he hasn’t stopped it even though they fell in love. laurent i’m obsessed with your mind. get help.

He remembered the night Laurent had addressed him in Akielon for the first time, remembered long nights speaking in Akielon, Laurent shoring up his vocabulary, improving his fluency, and his choice of subject matter—border geography, treaties, troop movements. He said it as it opened up inside him, ‘They are our reinforcements.’

right logical path, technically right conclusion, but you are missing the additional reveal here so bad 😭 it’s okay buddy i missed it too the first time 😭

The truth was marching towards him.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO great line. great line for people who Get It and people who don’t. the truth = damianos, yeah, but also the truth = laurent knew. but damen only means the first truth, and the cliffhanger works so well because the reader might not know the second truth either. which i think is the ideal initial experience!

The Regent had been right, people were saying: Laurent had been in league with Akielos all along. It was a strange kind of madness to realise that this, in fact, was true.

context: the regent and laurent were both in league with akielos, just different pieces of it. regent teamed up with kastor, and laurent made contact with nikandros. it makes sense, since delpha is so close to acquitart/vere (i don’t know if i spelled that right) and they share relations with vaskians

this does make nikandros' burning hatred of laurent in book 3 like exponentially funnier though

He could feel the tension of the Akielon forces too, knew they were expecting treachery. The first sword drawn, the first arrow loosed, would unleash a killing force.

so what exactly did laurent say to convince them to come? i get that he meant for them to get here and be jumpscared by their dead prince, but what was the fake reason? just like a vague call for help/solidarity? do the akielons think it’s a trap, or did they come here to attack? it must be the first thing, if the signet is being presented. god this makes my head hurt but i am determined to explore every little nook and cranny of laurent’s insane political rube goldberg machine it’s like enrichment to me

also, holy fucking shit. if laurent always knew this was going to happen, because he set it into motion a while ago, then his comments about having one more night with damen hit so much harder. not only did he know he was going to lose damen, but he also knew that he had arranged things so that damen wouldn’t even have a choice in staying. he was always going to be exposed as a prince, and returned to his former station, and separated from laurent, no matter what. laurent had initially assumed, for good reason, that damen wouldn’t ever want to stay. but throughout this book that assumption has been challenged, over and over again. but laurent couldn’t just take back the messenger by the time they were getting really close. laurent failsafed this shit from the start, so that even if he started to spiral into cognitive dissonance, reality would inevitably arrive to snap him out of it.

laurent has put himself in a hell of his own design, and unlike previous laurent purgatories, this one wasn't on purpose. the intention had been to free himself of his brother’s killer, who his uncle placed in his life as a means of tormenting him. but instead, laurent’s gambit ends up ensuring that the only living person who truly loves him has no choice but to leave.

truly putting the “L” in laurent.

final notes

damen likes blondes mentions: 6 -> 8

laurent leans: 9 -> 11

lamen hr complaints: 4

(i started an ointment joke tally in like chapter one but it never came up again so it doesn't count)

character elements to watch out for (from book 1):

laurent perspective context (knowing what i know, what sense can i make?)

laurent & nicaise

laurent coping mechanisms (pretending, delusion)

damen coping mechanisms (avoidance, distraction)

damen reconsidering the ethics of akielos

mutual moral arbitration

new for book 2:

laurent intimacy depiction

damen's relationship with his father's legacy

damen comparing his current self to himself before vere

laurent and damen are living in two entirely different genres

series themes (from book 1):

niceness vs. goodness

submission vs. respect - “there is no honour in obedience”

suffering alone vs. fighting together

pain and humor

honor and integrity

sex, power, innocence, violence

trauma, desire, consent

new for book 2:

a kingdom or this

multifaceted tenderness

#this one is super long and it gets a little sentimental in the first part #and then you get to see me lose my mind as i remember/understand laurent's insane plan in real time #capri #sam reads capri #prince's gambit #laurent of vere #damen of akeilos #lamen

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xo-arcie · 16 days ago

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fateful encounter

paring: Ayame Sohma x Kazuma Sohma summary: Kazuma meets someone during the parent-teacher conference that changes everything. warnings: no warnings, just gay pining word count: 2.1k+ author’s note: This is the kind of thing that lives rent free in my head and I thought I would share it. I plan on doing a Fruits Basket au about the two of them, but I have other things I need to finish. Also, I always draw Ayame blushing like a slut and thought I would show Kazuma's reaction (below). Repost from ao3, art by me! 💜

Love cannot be forced, love cannot be coaxed and teased. It comes out of the heaven, unmasked and unsought. -Pearl S. Buck

The day was waning away with the last of the students, and their parents, filtering out of the classrooms after they finished their scheduled parent-teacher conference. Kazuma, always patient, always amiable, stepped forward with his son in tow only to be halted by a storm that barreled through the hallway.

Kazuma remained at Kyo’s side, hugging a little closer to the wall to allow the mother of Yuki Sohma to push past with a sneer carved on her sharp features, the clack of her heels echoing off the linoleum. Yuki was following after her, the remorseful gray of his eyes downcast, a slouched petitance with his steps as if he was weighed down by her rude actions, though Kazuma would never hold the young man accountable for them.

“The actions of others are never about you,” he had told Kyo years ago when he first brought the boy home. “They are only acting for themselves, never for you.”

He wondered if anyone had ever told this to Yuki.

The mother and son entered the classroom, taking their time slot, and the door slid shut behind them, leaving Kazuma and Kyo alone to wait once again. He looked down at Kyo and was surprised by the empathy that was twisting into the scowl his son always carried–the red on his nose and cheeks clashing with the mess of his hair. Kyo was vibrating with a struggled composure, his eyes trained through the window slit on the door while every muscle ticked in his features, listening in on the rise and fall of that woman’s voice.

She was muffled, but her arrogance still cut through, speaking over the teacher and drowning out her son.

Kazuma followed Kyo’s line of sight to see Yuki seated at his mother’s side, wilting away with each word. The boy was stricken silent, pale and beaten, far too world-weary for someone his age.

It pulled at his heartstrings.

“Do you know that boy?” Kazuma asked.

His question was soft, just a tentative touch to understand the emotions that were playing across Kyo’s face. Kazuma knew who Yuki Sohma was–everyone at the estate knew who Yuki Sohma was–but he also knew of the rivalry between his son and the rat. It was something deep seeded when he found Kyo, a foundation from centuries passed, something that festered a hatred that burned as red as his hair.

Which was why his son’s sudden rigid posture caught him off guard. He saw how Kyo steeled his jaw and clenched his fists as he watched Yuki, but Kaziuma knew that his visceral response was a different kind of aggravation that unknowingly unearthed itself.

To anyone else it would just seem like the continued animosity between the cat and the rat, but Kazuma knew his son, knew his kind heart beneath the fusion of guilt and rage. He could decipher the empathy that was lining Kyo’s furrowed brow, bleeding from his crimson eyes and pouring over Yuki.

This kindness showed more often since his friendship with the girl named Tohru began, a frequency to a freshly compassion that always thrummed beneath. It was a look that called to Kazuma, alighting his savior complex, but instead he paused, wanting to understand the reaction unfolding in front of his eyes.

He was curious to see if his son truly wished to help the boy.

So Kazuma waited.

“He clearly does not want her to speak for him, and she does not care about anything he has to say.” Kyo was quiet, careful to knit his words together with his dawning realization, a newfound perspective on his lifelong adversary. “Yuki seems so…”

Wounded. But Kazuma did not say this out loud; he never wanted to persuade an original thought from his son, but always allowed Kyo to come to his own conclusion and then support whatever he decided on.

“I see now that he is not as fortunate as me,” Kyo finished, looking up at him.

Kazuma was not expecting that train of thought and it struck him with a warmth that pooled into his chest, swelling his heart against his ribs. It confirmed the compassion he always knew existed within his son, something blossoming with Tohru, something vibrant albeit fleeting.

But still, it returned, and it always lingered a little bit longer each time.

Kazuma said nothing in response, but shifted closer to wrap his arm around Kyo’s shoulders, pulling him for a hug against his side. His son begrudgingly leaned into it, his embarrassment burning bright from the public display of affection despite the hallway being empty save for them.

“Perhaps Yuki could use some help,” Kazuma offered, tucking his chin down; Kyo nodded in return, his eyes avoiding.

He smiled as he let go of Kyo with the good intention to step forward, to go help Yuki, only to be halted yet again but this time by the grandiose entrance of a man with silver hair.

Kazuma felt rooted, captivated by the almost ethereal beauty that the man possessed. His hair was pulled back and flowed with his steps, a determination and a grace with his gate, and the subtle sway of his slender hips that pulled Kazuma’s gaze. The man was lithe and lean, dressed in rich, burgundy fabrics that complemented his figure, his ivory complexion that was flawless and glowing, his exquisite features surely carved from marble.

His proximity pulled the air from Kazuma’s chest as he breezed past without sparing him a look–it even had Kyo averting his eyes. A floral scent followed after from the bouquet of roses he carried, his delicate fingers wrapped around the bundled stems.

Kazuma watched as he pulled open the door with flourish, his voice lyrical as he announced himself.

“Greetings, all! I have finally arrived!”

The door slid closed behind him and Kazuma mourned the barrier between. He felt in a daze from the vision, propped against the wall by the silence and emptiness the man left behind, settling over like a fog. His abstract gaze fell back to Kyo to see the familiar scowl burrowing back on his features, his eyes boring through the floor at his feet. Kazuma remained quiet, wordless, enraptured; he shifted his weight, daring to peer through the same window to try and catch another glimpse of the silver haired beauty.

He saw that the man had forced himself between Yuki and his mother–a knight serving, bold and defending. He was squared off towards her, guarding the young man from her hateful stare with a taunting curl to his lips.

It left Kazuma flustered.

For as long as Kazuma remembered, romance was never something that came easily for him. He had a sweetheart while he was attending school, someone who just followed after him aimlessly and who always pressed for something more; when he did not reciprocate, they rightly moved onto someone else who would.

It did not fare better as an adult, but Kazuma still accepted whatever set-up was managed, often encouraged by Kyo. He did not care for the meet-ups, as too often they seemed daunted, almost annoyed with the topic of his son.

It rarely, if ever, reached a second date.

Kazuma never minded this, though. Despite his amorous shortcomings, he was still a romantic at heart, and it was encouraged by the books that Shigure would often drop off. It gave a rose tint to his life and beyond those pages, when he noticed the slow burn between his son and Tohru, he tried to tactfully approach the subject.

Kyo scoffed at him, demanding that he keep his focus on finding someone to finally settle down with.

“‘Love cannot be forced, love cannot be coaxed and teased,’” Kazuma began a quote which had Kyo groaning, rolling his eyes. “‘It comes out of the heaven, unmasked and unsought.’”

Kyo tsked. “What do you even mean by that?”

“You will understand that when you are older,” he teased.

In truth, the idea of dating, muchless to fall in love, was something that Kazuma no longer bothered himself with, but that was before this very moment when he watched the moon incarnate waltz in starlight through the school hallways with the subtle sway of his hips.

Even with the door drawn shit, Kazuma still felt the pull of the man’s proximity through the classroom walls, and it was vibrating his bones beneath, entangling, enrapturing, pulling him out along with the tides.

Kyo noticed the immediate change. “Are you all right?” The concern in his son’s voice broke through his thoughts and Kazuma straightened himself, the blood pouring into his face. “You look…flushed.”

In truth, his throat felt dry, clawing for the words to reply, but fortunately the door opened once again. This time it was Yuki’s mother rushing from the room, her fury red on her face and her hands shaking to smooth away the wrinkles from her blazer and skirt with her frantic steps to get away.

Yuki was quick to follow after her, propelled by some epiphany ablaze, something that now held his shoulders higher than before.

Kyo watched after him for a moment before he looked back up at Kazuma, his worry anew. “You can follow after him and make sure he is all right, if you want,” Kazuma suggested, though he knew that his son was not asking for permission, but for reassurance of what was plainly written on his face.

Kyo nodded and followed after, but kept a mindful distance, leaving Kazuma alone again in the hallway. Only then did he dare to look through the now open door, his heart pounding.

Kazuma saw the teacher who seemed drained, but sat up straight once she noticed his gaze, peering through the roses she was gifted. “Oh! I’m so sorry to keep you waiting! We can begin if you’re ready–” she pushed to stand and the silver haired man followed, turning to see who she was speaking to.

Kazuma fell back into the trance from before, the stars swirling and blurring around him. He swallowed, his blood coursing, and he felt pinned in the doorway by the molten golden eyes that poured over him.

“Oh my!” the silver haired man’s musical tone began, a touch of pink to his cheeks. “Did my dastardly mother’s inconsideration cause a delay in your scheduled time with this wondrous educator?” –the teacher muted her groan, burying her face back into the bouquet– “I would apologize on that woman’s behalf, but I know that she will surely repeat her ghastly behavior!”

There was a passion with each syllable that left Kazuma entranced, pulsing with his heartbeat. “It’s all right,” he gave a sheepish smile, his cheeks staining red from the rhythmic bruising of his heart against his chest. He forced himself to look back at the teacher. “We can begin when Kyo comes back.”

The man brightened with the name, his eyelashes fluttering with an impish smile. “Oh, oh, are you the father of Kyokichi?”

Kazuma chuckled at the pet name, knowing already how Kyo would hate it. “Yes I am. My name is Kazuma.”

“What a pleasure it is to meet you finally!” The man pressed closer with the same flowery scent, subtle and sweeping away the air around them. Kazuma felt his head buzzing, relishing in the sight of the pink dust on the man’s cheeks. He looked down to see his hand was offered. “I am Yuki’s brother, Ayame.”

His touch was a welcomed contrast to the warmth and calluses of Kazuma’s palms, delicate and soft and cool, something that set his nerves alight. The simple gesture shattered whatever contentment he believed to have before meeting Ayame, splintering his insides and rushing to the surface, pushing sharp against his skin.

Kazuma never wanted to let go of him; he wanted to cradle Ayame’s hand and run his fingertips along the lines that carved into his palm, to interlace his fingers and see how they would fit within his own.

And Kazuma realized he found something he had not even realized had been missing.

He surfaced from that thought, jolting back to attention. Ayame had not pulled away but was watching him carefully, coyly from beneath his long silver lashes.

Relief washed over, hope widening Kazuma’s smile, white against his crimson features. “The pleasure is truly mine, Ayame-sama.”

Ayame’s laughter was just as lovely, just as melodic, trilling up the length of Kazuma’s spine. “None of that! You may call me Aya-chan, if you would prefer. Since your son and my brother are beginning their affinity for one another, I feel we are destined to become,” –his lips ticked upwards in the corner of his mouth– “closer acquaintances.”

There was nothing Kazuma wanted more.

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#my art #fruits basket #fruits basket 2019 #fruits basket fanart #fruits basket fanfic #fruits basket fanfiction #fruits basket fluff #furuba #furuba fanart #ayame sohma #kazuma sohma #ayame x kazuma #kazuma x ayame #artists on tumblr #digital art

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tarisilmarwen · 1 year ago

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Rebels Rewatch: “Spark of Rebellion”

With the Ahsoka show coming up here in August, I have just enough time for a full refresher so, you know, I Might As Well.

This is going to be different from my normal liveblogs, obviously, less real-time reactions and more commentary and meta analysis, though you’ll probably still get some incoherent nerdery and feelings spew here and there.

All right, let’s get into it.

You know with the benefit of hindsight, Vader’s speech to the Grand Inquisitor here is actually a perfect encapsulation and summary of the premise of the show.

“Hey so the Jedi are dead and the Empire reigns but the Emperor is still worried about threats to his rule, so your job is to hunt down and kill anyone a little bit too Force Sensitive and also anyone Order 66 managed to miss.”

It’s an interesting choice of phrase too.

“The Children of the Force”

Emphasizes the villainy of our bad guys in that they’re hunting down literal children and also seems to suggest some kind of protectiveness from the Force here; these are its children, people born into its “family”, so to speak.

Anyway.

OKAY WAIT NO I NEED TO STOP BECAUSE I STILL CAN’T GET OVER HOW THIS SCENE IS PARALLELED IN THE FINALE.

SHOT FOR SHOT. SHOT. FOR. SHOT.

The show opens with the “boy who was lost” and closes with the “girl who was broken”, Sabine’s move into more narrative prominence S3 onward was not a writing mistake, it was purposeful, it was deliberate, the show is their coming-of-age arc, they are co-protagonists, they are each other’s Most Important Person and have so much influence on each other’s character development and it’s reflected so perfectly in that seventy-something episodes later we’re going to see Sabine standing right here where Ezra’s standing now.

*sobs*

Okay I’m good.

Right here is also when we hear our first classic Star Wars leitmotif, as the Imperial March blares out with obnoxious brassy flair.

Followed almost immediately by the short excerpt of the Rebel Alliance theme that functions as our stinger.

(I’m going to be talking about the score A LOT this time around, better get used to it lol.)

Ugh, there was this one stupid post that was like, “What’s so bad about the Empire regulating commerce anyway? Controlling food safety is a good thing!” REGULATIONS ARE A TOOL OF THE STATE TO CONTROL ITS PEOPLE SHARON, you notice they harass this vendor specifically because he hasn’t asked permission from the oh-so-benevolent Empire to make a couple credits selling a single basket of fruit, as if that’s something the Empire needs to control, and when he dares to complain about it they immediately want to toss him in prison. That’s the epitome of petty state authoritarianism.

This is also such a wonderful character establishing moment for Ezra, because as much as he says he’s only out for himself and doesn’t stick his neck out for people the very first thing we see him doing in the show is surreptitiously sticking up for this harassed vendor.

We learn three main things here: 1. He’s clever and agile, 2. He’s a street kid trying to survive, 3. He actually really does care about people. All in less than a minute. Very tight writing.

I love the sound effect they use to signify Force use. It’s very pretty.

Aaaaand of course accompanying it, the quiet string prelude to the classic Force theme. An immediate auditory clue cueing us into the fact that Ezra is also Force Sensitive. So unconsciously, we’re already primed to expect that.

Snrk, I still love how casually Sabine tosses the grenade onto the speeder.

There’s a strechiness and elasticity to the character models here that I think they lose later, as the tone evens out into being more serious, but it’s very Disney-esque.

Actually hilarious and kind of fascinating that instead of stopping Ezra, Sabine lets him keep part of the shipment and have a fair shot at escaping.

She definitely sounds like she likes his gumption.

If no supposed to ship, why let Tiya say the line so playfully here?

Zeb’s resigned thumbs up always cracks me up.

It bears repeating but the animation? Very Disney-esque. The whole way characters move, their design, how they emote and express.

I was always particularly impressed by the hair.

Look at it.

It’s always shifting softly around Ezra’s face and blowing in the wind and reacting to his movement shafkjghkajh.

SO much better than early Clone Wars.

No, shut up, go back and watch those awkward early episodes.

The faces don’t emote.

Kanan’s fond little smile. :) He already loves that kid so much.

Again with the animation being very 2D Disney hand-drawn inspired in the way Kanan sloughs his shoulders here replying to Hera.

Hgnnnglllll the little shine in Ezra’s irises shifts like it’s an anime sparkle, I love this animation I love it I love it your Clone Wars could never.

If no supposed to ship, literally why have this moment with the classic Sees Her In Sparklevision trope? (Okay so I added the actual sparkles but still.)

Seriously Filoni. “I think there’s an automatic instinct to ship them.” WELL WITH THIS COMING DAY ONE EPISODE ONE WHAT DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?!

Hi Kallus!

Right so after this sequence where Ezra feels inexplicably guilty for not doing more to help the people of Tarkintown despite him literally only finding out they existed two minutes ago there was pretty much no way I wasn’t going to love him.

I think my brain subconsciously recognized, “Oh, he has a Hero Complex.” annnnd yep, yep, that did it, he’s my son now.

Interestingly, this is also I believe the first time we hear Ezra’s leitmotif, which like Luke’s theme is primarily in brass but in a minor key, slower, more somber, more introspective, almost a thematic foil to the adventurous bold excitement of Luke’s theme.

Luke’s theme, AKA the Star Wars Main Title theme, by the way, is primarily used throughout Rebels to denote heroism. Typically it comes in whenever we have a Gunship Rescue from the Ghost or some other kind of Big Damn Heroes moment.

Side note appreciating the animation again, the storyboarding and blocking is very cinematic. The camera moves as it might on a modern Hollywood production instead of a weekly TV serial, which I think helps makes Rebels feel closer to the Original Trilogy.

And here the full Force theme breaks through. :)

Note: At this point, behind the scenes, Hera and Kanan have already discussed Ezra’s potential Force Sensitivity, and agreed to test him. I am still sorely in need of fanfics that cover that conversation. Just saying.

AGAIN. WRITERS. YOU NEED TO BE A LITTLE MORE AWARE OF JUST HOW SHIPPY THINGS COME ACROSS BETWEEN EZRA AND SABINE THIS FIRST EPISODE.

Like, there’s a reason why this conversation and footage is used in a million Sabezra amvs.

Ezra rubbing his hand on his neck, Sabine’s soft looks of concern at him, how warmly she finally reciprocates on telling him her name...

(Also notice how Ezra, empath that he is, immediately cottons onto the fact that Sabine considers the Ghost crew her family and discerns that something or other happened to her bio family.)

Gremlin child Ezra. <3

I’m sorry, I just noticed this:

What is that look, Sabine? Lolol.

Hera going into Mom Mode immediately. Her cheeky look back at Kanan, lol, she knows exactly what she’s doing.

Edgy TWC bros complained so much about the humor in early Season One and I say they have no taste, “rare hairless Wookie” is hilarious.

Part Twooooooooo!

For all his bluster and his devil may care facade, Ezra had that Jedi compassion and drive in him from the very start, I will hear NO slander otherwise.

Something in this escape sequence I absolutely love? Ezra clinging to Zeb’s back. Just the way he grabs Zeb’s legs and climbs him like a feral cat. And Zeb does not appreciate it lol.

Oh hey, we’re at The Scene That Basically Sealed Ezra As Tari’s New Favorite Whump Target.

Yeah, protip to all showrunners, you put an emotionally vulnerable young male protagonist in mortal peril and you basically guarantee that I will obsess and fixate on them forever.

EVERY SINGLE FRAME OF THIS SHOT IS MORE HEARTBREAKING THAN THE LAST.

Hngl and you can hear him hyperventilating too ow my heart.

A brief excerpt of Ezra’s theme plays right here too, as if to compound Zeb’s guilt about the whole thing lol.

Like the score itself is saying, “HEY AREN’T YOU MISSING SOMEONE?!”

Sabine automatically assuming Zeb did something to Ezra. <3

Hera full-naming Zeb. <333333

A couple people pointed out before that Ezra flinches pretty noticably when Kallus reaches for him, and Kallus definitely marks that reaction with his eyes. It’s such a quick little sequence but it’s fascinating in the layers it suggests.

I reiterate: The subtle facial animation is this show is fantastic. The minute little emotions that you can pick up tell so much story.

Chopper voting with Hera to go back for Ezra. <333333333333333 The murder hobo does have a heart.

I love the little sideglance these troopers give each other after Ezra seals them in. You can’t even see their faces but you know they’re chagrined all, “Oh. Ohhhh we’re in so much trouble.”

And the joke is even followed up on when Kallus demands to know how Ezra escaped and this poor dude just has all the notes of, “This is the worst day of my life.” in his voice lololol.

I gotta gives props to Taylor Gray, he pulls off Ezra’s impersonations really well.

So how much do you want to bet Kallus had unfortunate flashbacks every time one of Sabine’s bombs threw him?

“I’m sure your parents must be worried sick.” “I don’t have parents.”

*URGE TO ADOPT HIM INTENSIFIES*

(Also, same, Hera, same.)

Speaking of entire stories being told in the subtle expressions...

Tangenting here a little bit, I’ve seen more than one bad faith reading chiding Kanan and especially Hera for “manipulating Ezra into being a child soldier” and hnnghghghgkjgdksh could you guys have any worse comprehension?

Ezra’s fate, narratively and meta-textually speaking, was sealed the moment he volunteered the information about the Wookies and actively took part in their rescue. He didn’t have to do any of that. He could have stayed quiet. He didn’t. He could have made Hera drop him off first. He didn’t. He could have stayed on the ship the whole rescue. He didn’t. And yeah, some of the reason why is because Hera told him it was better to fight for others than only for himself, but also have you considered that Ezra maybe is just that selfless at heart?

(See above where his Establishing Character Moment was saving that fruit vendor.)

ANYWAY, if he hadn’t done any of that, Kallus would have never seen him leap far higher than he was supposed to be able to, and would never have marked him as a Force Sensitive, would never have alerted the Inquisitor to him and basically marked him as a target.

Any time the local Lothal garrison spotted him, their impetus would be his capture and/or extermination. Ditto for when news eventually reached the Inquisitorius.

The safest place for him was absolutely staying with the Ghost (where he could be trained to protect himself) and they even gave him the choice about it.

To say that he was manipulated or guilted by Hera into following instincts that were already inside him denies Ezra his narrative agency; he chose to become a Rebel and fight against the Empire. Hera might have awakened his heroism but it was Ezra who Answered The Call.

All right, tangent over.

Oh ho man, you can tell they went into this with zero plans to redeem Kallus.

I mean, I’m glad that it happened, I definitely enjoy that aspect of his character. But there was noooooo groundwork laid for it in these early episodes lol.

Writers got halfway in and realized, “Shit, we like him.” and then had to scramble to come up with something, which, I mean... I relate.

Ah, here’s what I mean when I say Luke’s theme is used primarily as a shorthand for the element of heroism.

And for an example of what I’m talking about re: cinematic camera motion, there’s the bit right where the crew charges out of the cargo hold onto the platform on Kessel. The camera is behind our subjects and instead of immediately cutting to an exterior shot (which would be perfectly acceptable), instead it sort of rolls out behind them, pushing down and forward with them, for a more dynamic shot.

Add several tracking shots after that, that basically follow specific characters, and with that simple cinema magic, the action sequence feels more frenetic and energized.

Gosh, Ezra was so tiny back in Season One.

I do like this cue right here, when the Imperial ship drops in, don’t know if it’s generic action filler or it becomes a leitmotif later, will have to pay attention I guess.

With context from A New Dawn, we know that Kanan has not ignited his lightsaber since Order 66, though he apparently came pretty close it in that book. I just find it rather beautiful and poetic that the Force tells him it’s time right when he has a padawan to protect. :)

And this reveal is still excellently done, fine candidate for my personal No Context Signature Scene Test (that being a scene which, when shown in isolation, showcases off the best of a movie or show and entices watchers to check out the rest, it must do a good job of selling the work, essentially).

POV shot as Kanan stands up out of cover, cut to in front of him, the action music drops out and fades into the Force Theme and Kanan just kind of... casually walks through shots, leaning around them, the sound gets muted slightly, we get the gunslinger shot of the lightsaber pieces clicking together and then the Force Theme gets a bass drum flare to emphasize the moment. Awed looks from everyone. A triumphant musical cue.

Even Kallus is unnerved for a second lol.

And I love the verbal hesitation when he says, “Focus your fire on... on the Jedi.” like he can’t even believe he’s saying that.

Is it any wonder why I love the whole Rebellion Era Jedi aesthetic? It does such a good job of encapsulating pure eucatastrophe, the sudden happy turn for good, a beacon of light and hope breaking through the darkness and despair.

The Wookies look at Kanan like a living legend has stepped out of the pages of their storybooks.

HNGH no one touch me.

And of course, Kanan stepping up immediately inspires Ezra to do the same, I love these two so much.

Wilhelm scream, lol.

See people, Kallus already associates Ezra with Kanan and has marked them as a master-padawan pair, there was no chance Ezra was going to just be able to keep his head down and live his life after this.

And again with the subtle expressions, there’s just a flash of sadness from Ezra here as he watches Kitwarr reunite with his dad, HAVE I MENTIONED I LOVE HOW UTTERLY EXPRESSIVE THE FACES ARE IN THIS SHOW?

I do kind of wonder what made Ezra decide to swipe Kanan’s lightsaber.

He had a thought to sell the holocron but honestly it seems like he wanted to keep the saber. As a keepsake? To use?

Honestly though I love it when writers have Force Sensitives just kind of compulsively drawn to Jedi artifacts and tools. Like some part of them is called by the Force within the items.

There’s a really cute, almost shy way that Sabine ducks into her shoulders here. I see it in amvs all the time but no one ever really talks about it.

I mean, along with Chopper’s sad little moan I think it’s meant to convey that they’re already fond of him and regret him having to leave.

Chopper loved Ezra from the beginning and only gave him grief because that’s how he shows affection change my mind.

Ezra does not take Zeb’s playful hit well, flinches like he did with Kallus. Of course later he’d get used to it but right now Ezra definitely does not associate roughhousing with affection.

Ezra gets so timid in his body language here.

I... I would really love to know how Kanan got up the tower. Where exactly is the turbolift in this thing? Is it in Ezra’s room? How’d Kanan sneak past?

I know we’re meant to believe Kanan is physically there and just Batmans in and out but honestly I don’t blame the people with the wild theory that Ezra’s having a vision of Kanan in this moment.

Speaking of Ezra’s timid body language, have you noticed how often he crosses his arms, in an insecure kind of self-protective fashion? This all but goes away in the later seasons as he grows up.

Aaaaaand we hear a snatch of Leia’s theme as Obi-Wan’s message plays again, a little musical Call Forward to the princess’s iconic plea for help perhaps?

Interestingly it fades into a very understated version of Luke’s theme, without the full orchestral accompaniment, just a single trumpet and then some quiet strings playing the notes.

I’m going to have to pay attention but I’m tentatively hypothesizing that Leia’s theme will primarily represent the aspect of hope in the series, to accompany Luke’s representing the idea of heroism.

Hope and heroism, two classic archthemes of Star Wars, lol.

Maybe it’s fitting that Ezra’s theme kind of blends the feel of both of the twins’.

On a completely different note, nice to see composer Kiner keeping in the tradition of assigning the Ominous Latin Chorus to the villains, lol.

I like Grand’s theme, it’s reminiscent of the Emperor’s, all bass male voices and dark minor chords in the strings.

I warned y’all I was gonna be talking about the soundtrack a lot in these.

And that’s the pilot premiere down. Some people said they found it hard to get into the series at first, but I was never one of them, the pilot had me hooked from the get go. Granted it was my birthday and I was a bit, ah... sloshed at the time.

Still, there was pretty much no way I wasn’t going to be into this show. The classic Star Wars feel, the lovely animation, the fact that Ezra was basically exactly My Type... (Orphan, tragic backstory, Hero Complex, heartwarming relationship with (surrogate) father figure, this boy was ticking off boxes left and right lemme tell ya.)

Pilot still holds up. Not every show’s first episode does but this one does.

This was a fun exercise. I think I’m going to try to knock one of these out a day at a time until Ahsoka drops, maybe not as in-depth and rambly as this one, but we’ll see.

Until tomorrow then.

#star wars #star wars rebels #ezra bridger #sabezra #space dad and his precious pumpkin child #liveblog #rebels rewatch #music #soundtracks #tari has a type and apparently it is shonen #your clone wars could never #agent kallus

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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 2 years ago

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sup!! i’ve kinda been stalking your stuff for awhile and your writing is always so impressive to me. the way you set the scene and write for levi just feels /right!/

anyway i barely do this but i’d like to see canon/verse levi and a picnic. reader doesn’t have to be specific but i’d describe myself as a spunky, short woman and i pay attention to a lot of detail when it comes to things like peoples favorite foods, snacks, making sure everything is kinda perfect because i want to make those i cherish feel special and cared for.

seriously though you deserve all this attention. 🫶

a;ldkfj asf you're so sweet im sobbing 😭 i hope its okay that i'm starting to do headcanons :) this made me smile as i was writing it

A Perfect Date | 500-Follower Event

➼ with the chaos that comes with living on paradis island and dating Humanity's Strongest Soldier™, the time between expeditions that the two of you could spend together is 100% cherished. as a result, when levi mentioned wanting to go out and do something with you, a picnic was the first thing that popped to mind ➼ this would take place either after the hole in wall maria is sealed or before shiganshina falls, so you'd go to one of the open fields in between wall maria and wall rose. it'd be away from people and just involve the two of you, a picnic blanket, and a picnic basket ➼ it's pretty hard to catch levi off-guard, but you have mastered the art of it. i can see him maybe not being a huge fan of pastries because of the mess it could make, but i can see him enjoying fruits like berries (or even dried fruits). so when he sees that you packed an assortment of those instead of the pastries that seem to be so commonly brought on these ordeals, you can see the slight tinting of his cheeks before mumbling something about how you had to be this extra about "just" a date (you know he secretly loves it though) ➼ if your goal is to make him feel special and cared for, even just this date would convey that to him. after his mom died, levi didn't really have anyone looking out for him (sure, there technically was kenny, but i doubt kenny was anywhere close to a sufficient parent figure and that's even before he left levi on his own). he just kinda always drifted on his own and taking on the caretaker role, without it getting it reciprocated. and he was okay with that, until he met you ➼ everything little thing you've ever done for him screamed at him over how much he was loved by you. the fact that you took the time to know him as a person, and even paying attention to seemingly useless details (like the fact that he didn't like pastries because they were crumbly), brought that rare smile onto his face ➼ he'd pull you in close, whispering to you just how much he appreciated you and how much he misses you whenever he's away on an expedition, and how much he longs to come back home. i know we say that levi's "not a words person", but i dont think that means that he doesn't use his words. he certainly still will, he just doesn't show it as much, but that means it even more special when he does ♡ ➼ after eating, the two of you would lay on the blanket next to each other, watching the clouds. your pinkies would be connected as you laid in a comfortable silence. after a while, he'd probably pull you into him, planting a kiss on the top of your head as you laid your head on his chest, listening to his steady heart rate, simply enjoying this time where all that mattered was his presence with you ♡

come bother me with some date requests since i somehow reached 500 followers la;dkjf

#why am i suddenly obsessed with pinky holding ;aljdfl;s #drabble event #levi ackerman #levi ackermann #levi heichou #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackermann x reader #levi heichou x reader #levi hcs #levi fluff #kats levi hcs #kats levi fluff

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splinterheart · 2 years ago

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hello, hello! this is star (he/him, 21+) with do hyeonju, a witch that can probably be found rotting at the library, staring blankly at the sea, shakily drinking an abnormal amount of hot coffee.. if you happened to be looking for him. (are you sure you want to?) here you can find his profile and right here, his plots! you can also find more beneath the read more, and i'll be around to plot or chat if you'd like. i hope you have good morning/day/night whenever you see this! <3

his memories from when he was younger are a little hazy. he doesn't remember much other than being in and out of several families for adoption, but never being able to stay long enough for it to stick feeling like a real family. everything just always feels off.. wrong to him, anywhere he goes. he also has no information about his birth family or where he came from, and when he's old enough, he's on his own as soon as he can be.

he does a lot of wandering, a lot of couch-surfing, here and there work and favors to keep him afloat. he's in a relationship that lasts the longest he's ever had anything- a few years, something he thinks may last a lifetime, and it ends abruptly, leaving hyeonju heartbroken and needing out.

having to get out, literally, as he's kicked out and finds nowhere else to go. he finds himself on a bus and lets it take him as far as he can until his money nearly runs out, and he lands on mabeob island. he had heard about the meteor showers before, and feeling lost, stays for enough time to wish on a falling star. and then he just.. doesn't leave.

maybe it's the fact that there's nothing else waiting for him, but there's something about the island that's familiar. and if there was a curtain over his eyes, it's slowly being lifted. ever since the meteor shower, he can see the red strings tied neatly around each person's ring finger, trailing in knotted anchors to the other side of their hearts, but his own hand, empty.

it comes to him in pieces. this island is more familiar than he thinks. one day, he's perusing fruit at the markets when an elderly women drops her basket and takes his face in her hands and starts to cry. and he doesn't know her, doesn't know the man behind her, either, but can see the strings tying their hands together.

it's his grandmother. there are pictures of him, here, before, as a child, and she explains how he had been taken away for his own safety. his mother, having fallen in love with his father despite the arranged marriage her parents had set forward for her, had hyeonju unexpectedly and left him in the care of his father's grandparents.

his father, heartbroken and throwing himself into work to handle not being able to be with the one that he loved, one day becomes lost at sea, a sailor of his own boat that sold fish in the markets. he still hasn't turned up to this day, but once his mother's grandmother had discovered hyeonju's existence still on the island- she ordered his mother to arrange him to leave to not be a distraction, as she had been visiting hyeonju in secret despite ending things with his father, and him becoming missing.

his memories had been taken from him of before, to somehow dissuade hyeonju from returning, yet he still found himself back, anyways, his own strings pulling him back to his roots. it's his grandmother that tells him of his magic and of how she suspects there was more that happened the night he was taken away, that she swears the spell his other grandmother cast on him to clear his memories did something else, too, to his magic, his identity.

it makes him think of his wish- of how he had only wanted to know what true love really was, if it even really existed, and why love had always been so hard for him to find. to keep. and looking down at his hands, untangled from any red strings to lead him to anyone, wonders if there's more there than he thinks. that his whole life, there had been more than just him, that maybe it wasn't all actually his fault.

it's not something he can easily unlearn. and meanwhile, learn more of himself, and his magic, and so he takes up a job at the library and spends his time reading up on anything he can get his hands on. lives at eopshin heights but often visits his grandparents at the outskirts, and slowly pieces his life together.

it's where he is now. after living so much of his life thinking he was human, and not knowing of so many pieces and finally getting memories, bits of it come back the longer he stays. all he wishes is for more understanding. to be able to believe, again, in all of the things he thought he had lost hope for. to get all of those answers he had always been seeking but never had been able to find.

tldr . hyeonju is a witch with a Lot of family baggage that he's just now starting to uncover, along with his magic and all of his memories slowly starting to come back, all of the perils he brought with him from seoul (no one will ever love me no one has ever loved me it must be My fault), and that he can now see everyone else's red strings but his own

and also where is his mom and grandmother and the rest of his extended family on that side . did they just Run after they decided the whole fate of his life and Probably was the reason he ended up like this anyways? are they hiding from him? did they make themselves hard to find? he will keep reading his books and trying not to rot all of the grass underneath him when he lays down in it to breathe for a little while (that is Not him messing up patches of the forest.. that's so funny. fall came a little early this year. oops)

plots! i do have a plots page here but i'm open to just talking something out or putting our muses into whatever evil thing we can cook up if you want to just do something fun! but some quick ideas:

give him someone to go dancing with and forget everything for a little while, i think he would be really into the feeling of being in the dark and getting lost in the music, even if they Were just pretending for the fun of it (who they are what matters that everything is kind of Not okay but it feels okay in this moment here with you)

he is probably making too much of a ruckus above/below/beside your apartment and it's because he is singing and dancing to music and unaware of how loud he's being. yell at him or let him bring by some cookies as consolation later

he keeps seeing you around town and remembers that you have that one book overdue and he's just like. please give me the book back. ill pay you (he will probably just snatch it and run he has no money but please still give the book back the library is missing so many as it is)

he probably is at the beach a lot staring out at the water thinking about Life (and if his father is still out there. if he even knows about him) but maybe they have a habit of running into each other and just start having a Beach Book Club but the books are just that they talk about life and feelings and the ocean makes them feel a little better about it

really anything! friends or enemies or someone to drink with or carry home at night or bump into and turn it into a streak of Why are you always right in front of me when i am trying to go anywhere

you knew him when you were young and he's forgotten now but he really wants to remember you. keeps asking you to show him photos and take him places and eat the same ice cream you did on that afternoon and smell the same flowers to try and remember. maybe he did remember awhile ago and now he just likes spending time with you. someone to remind him that the love really is there and it really does matter (and he really does care)

anyways this is way too long already but if you have read this far then hyeonju and i give you a gold star! (his is a little rumpled but mine is so shiny and glittery) my dm's are always open if you want to plot anything out or chat, so i'll hopefully see you there if you'd like!

#mabeob:intro #look away at how long this was #i can't see it you can't see it either

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m0thwinged · 1 year ago

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DEAD CACTUS AU

Kel was killed the day before his big basketball game. Aubrey pushed him into the street during a fight, and Sunny staged it as a suicide via writing a fake suicide note.

Hero suffers badly, acting much like he did in the og game. He hides away from the world, and he lashes out at Mari instead of Kel. "MAYBE IF I NEVER GOT WITH YOU, HE'D STILL BE ALIVE!" Or something like that... His parents assume Mari made him cry, Mari is never allowed over anymore. Hero never makes up with Mari, and Mari assumes Hero hates her. hero doesn't cook much breakfast anymore he usually skips it, or when he DOES make breakfast, makes too much (enough for Kel, mostly out of habit) In headspace he's the exact same except orange, like everyone else except Omori and Aubrey.

Sunny isn't as much of a Hikikomori, he goes outside, but he's very anxious and completely mute. He completely avoids every one of his old friends. Mari tries to get him to interact with them again, but like Hero, he completely distances himself. In Headspace, he's the only main character besides Aubrey to have a non-orange color scheme. He's outlined in red, the same color that was smeared across the roadside that day. He still lives in whitespace though. Omori/Sunny would have to fight against maxophobia, fear of cars, Hemophobia, fear of blood, and Nyctophobia. fear of the dark? Kel's death happened while they were playing at night, due to a car, and he bled a lot.

Mari is doing well, actually... well, she ACTS like she's doing okay. The breakup with Hero and Kel's death hit her hard. She mostly puts on a brave face for Sunny... she knows he's dealing with a lot. She often tries to visit Aubrey and Basil, but Aubrey runs away from her every time she approaches her, and Basil... well.... In headspace, she's on the team along with Basil! She throws fruit at the enemy with her trusty picnic basket in hand!

Basil DID scribble over the photos in this au. He was so distraught and hit hard when everyone locked themselves away. His thought pattern is quite similar to Aubrey's in the main game. He never finds any other friends, and spends his time stomping on flowers in the park and hitting people in the head with a basketball he painted green... it was Kel's, once. Every time he sees one of his old friends, he just stares at them, hurt. They never talk to him anymore... all of his flowers are dead, now... well, except the cacti. They never seem to die, and Basil seems to actually take care of them. In Headspace, he's on the team along with Mari! He uses his flower crown, just like in boss rush.

Aubrey's hair is orange now, because.. "Pink is a gross color." Kel's blood was also a gross color, though she doesn't remember a lot of that day. She pushed Kel into the road during a fight, and Sunny had the idea to make it look like a suicide by writing a suicide note and putting it next to the body. Aubrey spends her days watching people play basketball and not talking to anyone. In Headspace, she's the only non-orange character. This is funny, because she mostly wears orange in Faraway. In Headspace, she's very pink. She goes missing after she finds a peculiar note while looking around for a lost photo around Basil's house. Something fun about her in headspace is that her and Kel NEVER fight in headspace. NEVER.

and then there's Kel. he's dead. In Headspace, he's always practicing basketball. He never leaves the court, maybe traveling to basketball courts littered around Headspace.

#omori #omori au #dead cactus au #death tw #blood mention #death mention

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sukirichi · 4 years ago

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— just the two of us

request: I almost read all of your jujutsu kaisen writings and I love it. Your writing is really good! I do not know if a request about a fics🥞 about satoru gojo who is really in love and not very possessive with an oblivious reader. It will be fun to see Satoru try to flirt with her and she doesn't get it🤣

pairings: gojo x oblivious! reader

notes: THIS IDEA IS SO CUTEEE I absolutely loved every second of writing it! thank you for the request and I hope you like this! 🥞 breakfast has been served!

word count: 3.3k

warnings: none, other than this is unedited and written humorously rather than seriously~

masterlist !

Gojo doesn’t know whether he’s lucky – or completely cursed – over the fact you’ve got no idea he’s so in love with you.

It’s a bright sunny morning, perfect for outdoor training, and he walks with you all the way to school with his hands shoved deep in his pockets. You stretch your arms out in the sky to bask in the morning glow and warmth of the sun, sleeves pushed up to your forearms to “get that vitamin D.”

Satoru snickers at your statement, because you’d totally be getting a different kind of Vitamin D if only you’d notice him. Sometimes he wonders, if maybe you’d inherited the Six Eyes instead of him, would you finally be able to see him – or would you still remain unaware?

He doesn’t even know where it began. A year ago, Yaga introduced you as the newest staff member. You’d been so fidgety and nervous then, unsure of what to do and worried if maybe the kids wouldn’t love. They did, of course, how could they not. Not only were you extremely fun to be with, you’re also caring, fretting and even crying whenever one of the students got injured over a mission.

Shoko reminds you all the time that this should be normal for you by now, but you always cry every time, sobbing that they’re still only kids and should be out having fun.

Yeah, maybe that’s where it began. Your kindness struck a chord in Satoru’s heart, and before he knew it, he was falling for you. Hard. Next thing you know, he shows up five minutes before you leave for work, mock-saluting you before inviting you to breakfast. He does this every damn day, and you still don’t get a single thing.

“That café was really good,” you muse, fingers stretching outwards and giggling as the sun peeks through the spaces. Satoru sighs beside you, wanting nothing more than to slip his fingers through those softer ones. “We should go back there sometime. Maybe even take the kids with us this weekend so we can all have breakfast together!”

Satoru masks a snicker with a cough. It reminds him of the time Megumi called you mom and dad by accident, to which you happily responded with before tackling the boy in hugs, while the strongest jujutsu sorcerer only flushed in embarrassment.

Him being him though, Satoru played it off cool, flipping his hair before striking a pose. “Huh, a dad?” he smirks, “The only person who gets to call me daddy would be no one else but Y/N.”

The raven haired first year student immediately recoils in disgust. Meanwhile, the innuendo flies straight through you, and you peer up at him innocently with your head tilted to the side. “Daddy? Why would I call you my dad? My father is still alive and well, and I don’t see you marrying my mom or anything,” Just as Megumi nearly howls in laughter – another evidence that you’re really something else to get the usually stoic boy to lose his composure like that – you snap your fingers, the light bulb above your head practically shining. “Oh, I get it! You prefer younger women and you want them to call you that! Kind of like the hype for onii-chan nowadays.”

Hopeless, Satoru wants to say, you’re absolutely, utterly hopeless.

“Hmm, I don’t know,” Satoru shrugs nonchalantly, sending a smirk your way. It usually drives everyone crazy, but you only smile back up at him in the same way you smile with everyone, and he tries his best to not show his shoulders are deflating. Nevertheless, he doesn’t give up. “How about you and I go out somewhere this weekend? The movies, perhaps?”

Say yes, say yes – please say yes.

Really though, he’s waiting for that ‘no’ already. Satoru knows you always go out of town during the weekends to visit your family in the countryside, only coming back on Monday the next week with a basket of fruits and traditional goods that isn’t so easy to find in the city.

But then you clasp your hands together in excitement, lashes fluttering delicately as you beam up at him. “Really? You’d like to go to the movies with me?”

“Of course I would,” Satoru tries not to stutter, hiding the fact that he’s completely taken aback. He’s the Gojo Satoru for heaven’s sake, he shouldn’t be this affected by anyone’s presence. “What makes you think I wouldn’t want to?”

“Oh, nothing, I just thought you were busy. This Saturday, then?”

Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap, it’s actually happening – his mind was barely functioning at this point, and he even slapped his cheeks to snap him back to life. “I thought there was a fly,” he lied with a chuckle, “But yeah, Saturday. I’ll pick you up?”

“Yeah, sure!”

Satoru wouldn’t stop smiling the whole way to the school. Even when Yuuji had face planted into the ground and Megumi sprained his ankle from training, he wasn’t able to get rid of the ridiculously big smile that stretched across his lips. He’s floating in cloud nine, flowers erupting from his ears and heart-shaped emojis bursting in his background.

“Well, you look creepy,” Shoko commented in the faculty room the moment you excused yourself, “Did you land a date with her or something?”

“That I did,” he stated proudly, even banging his fist on his chest like a deranged form of King Kong.

“I can only hope Y/N makes it out alive,” Nanami announces from behind the newspaper he’s reading, legs crossed over another before he peeks above the paper, narrowed eyes dead set on the blindfolded man. “Don’t be too wild with her, Satoru. She’s a gentle soul despite being a sorcerer – I humbly suggest you don’t mess with her feelings.”

“Are you kidding me? She’s the one messing with my feelings by being so fucking cute all the time!”

“Who’s cute?”

Shoko nearly spits out her coffee the moment you enter, glancing around the room and sitting down next to a shock-still Satoru. Nanami only huffs in his seat with a shake of his head. It doesn’t take long before Satoru regains his confidence and recovers from his shock – he’s turned to you with his torso completely facing your way.

You bask in the attention, mimicking the gesture until your faces are mere inches from one another. The fact you’re so responsive and attentive to him yet still painfully naïve strikes a mental war of himself debating whether he wants to kiss you or knock your head upside down. Satoru chooses neither options as he leans closer, his smile growing wider when you don’t pull away, and he doesn’t stop moving until his lips are right beside the shell of your ear.

“You’re cute.”

Shoko shudders at the same time Nanami just gives up on everything, folding his paper and lying that he’s got someplace to go with Ichiji. Satoru patiently waits for your reaction; for you to crumble this time around.

You’re silent for a moment, brows almost right across each other when you register his words. Satoru ends up holding his breath for your next words, wondering: is this it? will she finally understand what I feel for her now?

Even Shoko ends up sitting at the edge of her seat, silently watching the exchange with interest barely hidden in her sparkling eyes. Satoru watches as your lips open, his eyes transfixed on the way the soft flesh moves. They tilt upwards, revealing a set of a wide smile – the smile he can never get enough of. “Thank you!” you giggle at his compliment, “You and Shoko are very cute too! And the kids too, especially Toge! Not that I’m saying he’s my favourite—”

“He’s definitely your favourite student,” snorts Shoko who is ignoring the way Satoru turns completely gray beside you.

It turns out you still haven’t figured it out after all.

“The kids this – the kids that,” the tall, lanky man whines, his head falling back on the back of the leather couch. He looks so utterly defeated you can’t help but lean over him to check if he’s okay, but Satoru pouts and hides his face under his uniform instead. “Why can it never be just the two of us?”

“Sorry, what did you say?”

This time, you’ve kneeled on the couch to hover him. You even pluck one side of his blindfold off to see how he’s doing, and suddenly thankful you can’t see the way his cheeks are absolutely flaming right now.

“Nothing,” he assures, his smile hidden behind his shirt. You look absolutely adorable hovering over him like that – eyes wide and lips pouty – what he wouldn’t give to kiss those lips right now, but it isn’t the right time, and Satoru just needs to find a better way to tell you how he feels. “It’s nothing.”

It’s absolutely not nothing.

Saturday couldn’t come faster.

Satoru finds himself willing time to go faster. Once the awaited day finally comes, he wastes no time in choosing his best outfit; an oversized black shirt tucked into black skinny jeans before styling his hair up the way he likes.

He winks at his reflection in the mirror, going ooh and aah at how hot he looks. It’s another reason why he can’t comprehend why you don’t like him yet, when, uhm, he knows he looks damn good? He’s pretty funny too – and his strength and power is already a no-brainer. Satoru can’t wrap his head around any possible reason why you wouldn’t like him; it’s basically a life or death mission at this point.

With that end goal in his mind and a spritz of perfume later, Satoru sashays out his apartment. Even though it’s already dark outside and he spent the whole day walking back and forth in his room trying to come up with ways to confess to you, he acts coolly all the way to your apartment.

This time around, he’s more than confident. He’s going to have you wrapped around his pretty little finger, “Wow,” is the first thing he says, pulling his blindfold down just to look at you.

Satoru feels blessed in that exact moment to witness how the heavens took their time with you, creating only the best out of the best and birthing the most magnificent person ever. Suddenly, he grows an urge to run to the countryside and thank your parents for going funky one night and creating you, because you’re an absolutely magnificent gift and it really baffles him how you’re real.

“Wow,” he repeats again, and you chuckle when he shakes his head. “You look beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.”

“Thank you,” you look him up and down, smiling in satisfaction. “You look very handsome yourself.”

Satoru’s been called handsome a million times before that it’s gotten too much in his head already, but hearing it come from your lips hits different. If he was excited before, it’s nothing compared to what he feels now when you loop your arm through his, dangling off his arm like you were a lover.

He knows it’s not real and this is probably just a friendly date for you – something he intends to clear up later – but it doesn’t stop him from puffing his chest up a bit, almost as if bragging to everyone around you that he was the one you’re with, and that he was the one you’re going to the movies with.

All your babbles about everything goes straight into one ear and out the other. He wants to listen to you, he really does, but he’s so intoxicated with your voice that he just ends up nodding at everything you say; his attention mostly on how sweet you sound and smell.

His feelings only intensify a hundred times more when you finally make it to the theatre. Not only is it dark, but you’re sitting right next to him, arms and thighs brushing against each other. He takes note of every little movement you make, smiling to himself when you don’t pull away from his thigh flush against yours.

In this close proximity, your perfume overwhelms his senses. He finds himself leaning closer just to get a little more taste of it, his arm resting on the armrest beside him and placing his cheek on his open palm.

He doesn’t even know what the movie is about. All he can see, hear, feel and recognize is you – nothing and no one but you. Just as he wanted, it’s just the two of you.

Satoru reaches out to the bowl of popcorn in his lap to distract himself from the need of kissing you already. He was so smug that he’s on this date with you; now he feels like the world is laughing and mocking at him because you’re so close yet so far away. The last thing he wants is to say something weird and have you running for the hills. It’s clear you don’t like him, after all.

You end up reaching for it the same time he does, making your fingers brush. It sends a jolt of electricity down his spine and he immediately retracts it.

Looking up at him with an apologetic smile, Satoru knows he’s messed up. “I’m sorry,” you blurt out, raising your hands in surrender with a nervous chuckle. “I should’ve gotten my own bowl instead.”

Satoru stares at you through his blindfold. You’re close enough that he can count your lashes – both top and bottom row – and he’s so stupefied at this point that he just says the first thing that comes to his mind; absolutely anything just to get your attention. “Cold,” he shows you his hand, “I’m cold.”

“Oh,” you nod and slip your fingers through his. Satoru nearly gasps at how electrifying the sensation is from having your smaller, softer fingers collide with his, your hands fitting perfectly in his bigger, calloused ones. Then, you close your intertwined hands and smush your cheek with it to transfer your heat – completely unaware that Satoru feels like he’s floating in his own Infinite Void right now. “Feel warmer now?”

“Yes,” he replies. “Extremely.”

Something beast-like wakes within him after that. Now that he knows you don’t mind touching him at all, Satoru can’t help but want to take out all his playing cards and just go fuck it. So he does – and he might regret, he might not – who cares? It’s just the two of you, and you’re the only one he ever cares about this much that he’d pretty much let you do anything at this point.

“You know,” Satoru begins, shifting until your joined hands are resting on top of his chest. His heart is just about ready to burst through its confines at this moment, but he holds back. It’s now or never. “Shoko and Nanami are annoyed that I talk about you all the time.”

Your eyes widen at his statement. “Really? Do you talk badly about me or something?”

“No,” he nearly groans in frustration, “You’re really pretty and cool. You’re amazing during missions, too, when you fight, it’s like I’m witnessing a warrior princess. So cool.”

This makes you laugh until the person sitting behind you rudely shushes you. You bow your head in apology, turning to Satoru with a softer smile this time; one that looks reserved and private compared to your big grins. “Oh, no,” he closes his eyes even behind his blindfold, “Don’t smile at me like that. I don’t think I’ll still be cool if I end up stuttering over my words.”

“Satoru!” you whisper-hiss, although your chest is filled with so much giddiness too that you’ve both forgotten about the movie; unaware that the entire theatre was crying over the main character’s friend’s death. “What are you going on about?”

He wants to laugh so damn hard. He thought confessing his feelings for you would end up in a pitiful heartbreak that you’d be weirded out and push him away. For a moment, he forgets it’s you, and that nothing is ever difficult or painful with you – other than, of course, you being oblivious, but that isn’t something he can’t fix. He’ll get you on the train one way or another.

“I have a confession.”

“Yeah?”

“I was practicing how to ask you out for a whole hour in the mirror,” Satoru whispers, careful to not ruin the melancholic mood of theatre. It doesn’t even surprise him that his world is filled with nothing but sunshine even if the world around you has descended into grief and loneliness. “I also called Nanami on first date tips.”

“Nanami?” you echo with a gasp, “Why Nanami?”

“Because he’s married, that’s why. Mans know some tips for sure.”

“Wait, so,” you chuckle nervously, and Satoru waits, waits for you to pull away or push him back – anything that would indicate discomfort. He’s patient the whole time, watching carefully as you only squeeze his hand and gesture to the both of you with your free one. “This is a date? Our first date?”

“Only if you want to be,” Satoru shrugs, grimacing afterwards at how sappy he sounds. “Well, I actually consider this our first date and I’ve been waiting for this for like forever now, so I sure as hell hope you want this too. I didn’t dress myself up today only to come back home crying.”

Satoru’s heart – if possible – only beats crazier and sings the syllables of your name when you start laughing harder to the point you have to muffle it by burying yourself in his bicep. He feels like his muscles and nerves could erupt at any moment. It’s crazy – absolutely insane – how you have him wrapped around your finger like this. He doesn’t complain though; he never will.

“I’m glad,” you mumble through his shirt, your erratic heartbeat matching kiss when you take the first tentative step of kissing his jaw.

Satoru stiffens underneath you, a low growl ripping from his throat. He’s feral, wild, drunk at the sight and scent of you. You make him feel like he’s fluctuating between dimensions, all the planets just crashing on one another until the stardust is left in your eyes because what else could be an explanation for what he’s feeling other than a supernova collision of hearts?

“You always make me feel so happy when you’re around that I still can’t believe you feel the same way. I was so worried that maybe you wouldn’t get my hints.”

Satoru groans, “What the hell? How long have you liked me?”

“I guess when you started bringing flowers to Megumi randomly just to piss him off.”

Satoru wants to rip his hair out. That was just a few weeks after you’ve started working with him, meaning you both have liked each other this whole time and he’s been suffering and feeling stupid just for nothing?

“God, Y/N,” he mutters to himself, “You really do know how to make a man go crazy, huh?”

That innocent smile on your face lets him know that as usual, you’re oblivious of everything. Satoru is right; he still can’t decide whether he wants to whack you in the head upside down. With a sigh, he ends up choosing the latter, nearly falling over his seat when you let out a surprised yelp at the feeling of his lips on yours.

It doesn’t take long before you grab onto his shirt and cling to dear life, laughter bubbling through your lips as you kiss. The sound is so precious he wants to bottle it up and keep it treasure for the rest of his life, but Satoru doesn’t rush anything.

With you and only with you is he ever capable of feeling like it’s just the two of you in a world filled with chaos and destruction.

8K notes · View notes

blackholelynn · 3 years ago

Text

Secret

Summary: You have a secret rendezvous with Arthur in the forest, but when you return to the lower town, you find that a plague has started while you were away

Pairing: Arthur Pendragon x Reader

Warnings: Illness/plague

Word Count: A whopping 3.6k!

A/N: I saw this prompt and I immediately thought of writing an Arthur fic, so here we are many, many words later! I actually used the wording of the prompt exactly and bolded it within the fic, so you'll be able to tell. This was written almost entirely in one sitting because I just couldn't pull myself away, but here it is! This is mostly fluff, with like...maybe a dash of hurt/comfort if you squint? Hope you enjoy!!

~~~

“Are you certain that nobody knows we’re here?” You asked, following Arthur through the forest. The terrain made it challenging to keep up, but you were not about to let this opportunity pass. It had been weeks since you could see Arthur for more than a few passing seconds, so the thought of spending an entire day with him was perfect.

Arthur chuckled as he turned towards you, holding out a hand to help you over a huge log. “I’m certain. I told Merlin to inform my father that I had gone out on a hunt.”

“And he won’t come looking for you?”

“No,” Arthur assured you. “Merlin will let us know if he does.”

An unbridled grin crossed your features as the nervousness melted away, and even after you were over the rough terrain, you kept hold of Arthur’s hand. “This is perfect. Thank you.”

He paused your journey to take your other hand in his as well, and the love in his eyes made your heart sing. “Thank you for putting up with all the secrecy. I wish it didn’t have to be this way.”

“You don’t have to thank me. If this is what we have to do to be together, then I’ll gladly continue sneaking around.” You mischievously smirked and swung your linked hands between you. “And you can’t deny it’s a bit fun, what with the thrill and all.”

He shook his head and laughed, continuing on the path to your meeting spot. “I only wish that I could court you officially. I’m sure you have more than your fair share of suitors in the lower town.”

“Oh yes, I’m swatting them away like flies,” you sarcastically responded. “Actually, Arthur, you’re the only person who has shown interest in me. I think most men find me intimidating.”

“You? Intimidating?”

You feigned offense and gasped. “Yes! Not everyone is willing to put up with my brashness.”

“You shouldn’t be with someone who has to ‘put up’ with you,” Arthur told you sincerely. The soft look of adoration was in his eyes again, and although he stayed looking forward to ensure the two of you wouldn’t tumble over the foliage, you could still see how much care he had for you. “Anyone who doesn’t see how wonderful you are is a fool.”

“Flatterer,” you snickered, bumping his shoulder with your own.

You both spent the rest of the walk in silence until you arrived at Arthur's chosen destination. It was a small clearing surrounded by tall trees that obstructed it from view. Arthur had laid out a blanket with baskets of food set out and prepared. The sunlight that streamed through the leaves cascaded over the area. It was perfect, more than you ever could have expected or hoped for.

Arthur opened his arms in a flourish, gesturing to the picnic he’d set up. “Do you like it?”

“It’s perfect,” you affirmed. You stepped further into the clearing, sitting down on the blanket alongside the picnic baskets, and looked up at Arthur, beckoning for him to join you. “Now come here and join me. I don’t want the fruits of your labor to go to waste.”

He smiled and lowered himself down beside you, wrapping an arm around your waist. “What were you saying again about being intimidating.”

“Oh, shut it,” you giggled. “You wouldn’t have me any other way.”

“You’re right.” Arthur leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to your lips, a smile on his lips as he stared into your eyes. “As always.”

The two of you spent hours basking in each other’s presence, eating the decadent foods that Arthur had snuck away from the kitchens. There was little conversation for the rest of your time spent together. You both preferred to spend the rest of the time with your lips pressed together, your hands leaving feather-light touches in their wakes. It was a moment that you never wanted to end, but you knew that you couldn’t stay in the forest forever. He was the prince, and you had duties to attend to back in town.

You squinted your eyes as you looked up at the sky, noticing that the sun was on a descent. “Arthur…” you trailed off, unable to focus. At the moment, Arthur’s lips were attached to your throat, making it terribly hard to concentrate. “It’s getting late.”

“Mm, I think we could get away with another hour,” he muttered against your skin. His teeth grazed against your pulse point, causing a shiver to run down your spine.

“We need to be back before nightfall. Although I would love to stay, I’m expected back.”

“Please,” he begged.

You held his face in your hands, pressing one kiss against his lips before pulling away and resting your forehead against his. “I’m sorry. You know we have to stay careful. We can’t get reckless.”

“You don’t have to remind me,” Arthur whined. He stood up, offering you a hand to help you up. “But we can make the trip back a bit slower and extend our time together.”

“Whatever you desire, your highness.” You curtsied in jest, a mischievous glint in your eye.

Arthur put an arm around your waist, drawing you close and whispering in your ear, “That would be you, darling.”

You tried to fight the heat that rose in your face and the back of your neck as you followed him out of the forest, and despite the shorter strides you made, you were still back much sooner than you both had hoped. Just before you exited the treeline, you and Arthur said your goodbyes and made sure to go your separate ways. He would return to the castle, and you would go back to your place in the lower town.

However, as you followed the winding trail back into the town, you noticed that no people were bustling about. Despite it being late, you had still expected to see people on their way back to their homes, but the streets were completely empty. Your stomach dropped as you continued walking further, becoming evermore concerned when the houses began to cluster closer together, and there were still no people.

A house’s door opened, and when Gaius was the one to step out, you wasted no time calling out to him. “Gaius!” You rushed over to him with a hopeful look in your eyes. If the physician were here, he would undoubtedly know what had happened in your absence. “What’s happening? Why are the streets so empty?”

Gaius’s mouth thinned into a line as he gave you a sympathetic glance. “There is a plague running rampant through the lower town. I am surprised you were not aware of it.”

“Oh.” You hadn’t thought of the fact that you being away was odd. You worked in the lower town in The Rising Sun, serving ale and food to patrons, and it was extremely rare for you to be gone. “I needed to run some errands for Evoric.”

“Errands? You came from the trail to the forest,” Gaius noted.

You turned back to look at the path you had traveled before turning back to Gaius with (what you hoped was) a convincing smile. “Yes! I knew of some berries in the forest that make great wine, and I offered to gather them.”

“No luck?”

“No, it seems the wildlife had other ideas for me today. I’ve spent all day in the forests, but I couldn’t find a single bush that wasn’t picked clean by the animals.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Gaius readjusted the bag he was carrying, which undoubtedly held the remedies and medical supplies he used. He took a look around the empty town before returning his attention to you. “Is there anyone in the upper quarter you can stay with?”

“I suppose I could stay with Gwen, but…” you trailed off, an uneasiness settling about you. It didn’t feel right to leave those you had known behind while you fled to safety. “What of some of the elderly that live here? Do they have anyone to care for them?”

“The plague is affecting young and old alike. I’m afraid that there are very few that have not fallen ill.”

“Is there anything that you can do for them?”

“I am doing everything that I can for them, but I must return to the castle to work on a more effective remedy,” Gaius said, and the regret in his voice was unmistakable. You could tell that he wanted to do more but was at a loss. With all his experience, you were sure that if Gaius were given enough time, he would find a treatment for the sickness running rampant through your home.

And you would be sure that the people were alive when he returned with that treatment. “I’m staying. Is there anything you can tell me to do to help those that are sick? I can care for them while you’re gone.”

“Are you sure?” Gaius asked, raising a brow at your sudden offer to assist. However, he didn’t need a response. He could see the determination in your eyes and nodded when he realized you would be unwavering. “You will need to try and keep the fevers down. You will also need to try and get them to eat and drink even if they refuse. It will be important to keep their strength up.” Gaius then pointed out each affected house to you, instructing you on the proper care for the people.

“I will make sure to care for them until you return.”

“Thank you. Make sure you also care for yourself. I should be back by the morning” Gaius gave you one last nod before starting towards the castle. You watched him leave before turning back to look at the houses that Gaius had directed you to, and you took a deep breath in before starting towards them. It would be a long night.

-*-*-*-

It was early afternoon when you realized that Gaius had not yet returned to the lower town. At least a dozen more people had gotten sick since he had left, and the people had caught wind that you were filling in for the physician. You hadn’t slept, and although your eyes were weary with exhaustion, you continued bustling from house to house.

You sat at the bedside of an elderly man who was one of the first to become ill, dabbing at the sweat on his brow. His daughter stood behind you in the doorway and wrung her hands nervously as she watched you care for him.

“You said that Gaius would be back in the morning,” she stated simply.

You nodded and set down the cloth so you could turn towards her. “That is what he told me. However, I’m beginning to worry.”

“What do you think may have happened?”

“I’m not certain.” You frowned, trying to piece it together in your mind. However, you couldn’t think of why he wouldn’t at least come back to check on his patients, even if he hadn’t figured out a remedy. “I would not normally ask this of you, but…I think something may have happened. Would you be able to take over these duties while I fetch Gaius?”

Without hesitation, she nodded. “Of course. You have done so much for us. It’s the least I could do.”

“I promise to be back shortly,” you assured her. You stood up from the chair and squeezed her arm as you passed her in the doorway. “Stay safe.”

“I will do my best.”

You forced your tired legs to carry you through the lower town and to the upper quarter as you left the house. It was a swift journey since there were no crowds to push through. When you got to the upper quarter and there were still no people milling about, you began to be concerned.

Until you approached the castle and a large crowd of people was gathered around the closed gates. Arthur stood on top of the ramparts looking down at the people, and you could tell that something was desperately wrong.

“What’s going on?” you asked someone in the crowd.

“The prince is going to address the disease running through the kingdom.”

You looked back up at Arthur, where he stood regally on top of the ramparts. He kept looking back at his father with a reluctant gaze, but one nod from Uther seemed to confirm whatever Arthur was dreading so much. You could see the weight on his shoulders, and at that moment, all you wanted to do was be by his side, to tell him that it was going to be alright.

He was standing on the balcony, looking down into the faces of his people, who loved him, who trusted him, and he almost couldn’t get the words out. Especially when his eyes locked with yours, and you could see his regal persona drop for just a moment. The despair that crossed his face was only there for a second, but you still saw it. “Our court physician has heard your pleas about the plague that has begun in our kingdom. We understand your concerns, and he is currently working on a remedy. However…” He hesitated and tore his eyes away from your own to address the crowd. “As of right now, we will be closing the gates to the Citadel. Until a treatment is found, no one is to enter or leave the castle.”

The crowd around you erupted into raucous complaints, and you hurriedly stepped back from the fray as they rushed towards the gates. It was complete chaos as everyone’s desperation culminated and exploded. Although you wanted to stay and try and find a way to Arthur, you knew that you would need to head back to the lower town and continue assisting the people, especially if Gaius could not return.

The responsibility to inform the people of the lower town fell to you, and it was difficult to see their spirits fall. You spent days running on little sleep and even less food in your stomach, going from house to house to care for those who were ill or who had fallen sick since the disease started spreading.

Once again, you were at the same older man’s bedside when your body was wracked by a coughing fit. You hurried to turn away from the elderly man lying in bed as you coughed, and his daughter was quick to rush to your side. She put a gentle hand on your shoulder to try and ground you.

“You should rest,” she urged.

You shook your head, clearing your throat as the coughing stopped. “I can’t. Someone needs to take care of the ill.”

“If you fall ill, there will be no one to take care of us. You must rest.”

“No. Please, I…” you trailed off, having difficulty thinking of the words that you wanted to say. A fog smothered your brain, and your eyes began to droop. You were so tired all of a sudden.

I could close my eyes. Just a moment. Only a moment.

Except when you did close your eyes, you collapsed. The only thing you felt was the cold ground as you fell out of the chair and the daughter’s hands shaking your shoulders.

-*-*-*-

When you woke up, you felt like your head was swimming. You didn’t recognize the room you were in, and you sat up to try and get your bearings. A warm blanket was wrapped around you, and it was much softer than the ones you were used to. There were shelves in the room stacked with bottles and herbs.

“You’re awake.”

Merlin stood in the room's doorway with a basket, and he rushed over to you when he realized that you were awake. Your brows furrowed when you saw him. How was he here? They said no one in or out of the castle.

Despite his protests, you didn’t lie back down. “How did I get here?”

“You collapsed. You were carried to the gates by one of the men of the lower town.”

“But why am I here?” You couldn’t wrap your head around it. As far as anyone knew, you weren’t anyone special – just the girl that worked in the tavern. “The gates are closed.”

Merlin picked up a small bottle filled with a dark liquid and handed it to you. “Here, you’ll need to drink this.” He waited for you to finish drinking the medicine before he continued. “Gaius convinced the king that it would be helpful to have one person to study in order to devise a treatment.”

You held the empty bottle in your hands, studying it with a deep frown. “You should have had him take the elderly man I cared for. He’s in much worse shape.”

“What?”

“You heard what I said,” you pointed out, setting the bottle down. You threw the blanket off of you, standing up. “I’m going back to the lower town.”

Merlin shook his head, immediately grabbing you by the arm and trying to stop you from leaving. “Hold on! You’re recovering, but you’re in no shape to be traveling. You shouldn’t even be out of bed! Let me get Gaius for you and–”

“I shouldn’t get special treatment, Merlin. You know that. It creates suspicion.” You weren’t strong enough to break his grasp, but you stayed standing. You met his gaze head-on in defiance.

“Arthur was ready to tell the King to get you treatment,” Merlin blurted out. The shock of his revelation allowed him to ease you back into the bed, and he carefully covered you with the blanket once more. “This was the best option to keep your relationship a secret. If you go back to the lower town, I’m sure that Arthur would do something drastic to keep you safe, so you need to stay here.”

You were still speechless but managed to nod in understanding, sinking back into the cot. Merlin gave you a small smile. He mentioned something about getting Gaius that you didn’t quite catch before he left. You sat alone, trying to process what Merlin had said.

Arthur would have come clean? He would have risked everything, all for me?

Another set of footsteps alerted you to someone else entering the room, and when they saw you were awake, the pace quickened so that they were at your side. “Are you alright?” It was Arthur. He sat down by your bedside, taking your chilled hand in both of his own. There was a look of desperation to him. “Gaius wasn’t sure…” He trailed off, and you could tell what his fear had been.

“I’m alright,” you assured him with a weak smile. When he wasn’t convinced, you laid your hand on the side of his neck, your thumb brushing over his jawline. “Arthur, Merlin told me you were going to tell the King. Please tell me that’s not true.”

He didn’t meet your gaze, his eyes falling to your other hand, still held in his own. “I never wanted to close the gates.”

“I know, but that doesn’t answer my question. Was he telling the truth?”

“Yes,” Arthur admitted.

You harshly swatted his shoulder, not wasting any time in scolding him. “No matter what happens, you can’t risk the crown like that. No special treatment, no obvious signs of affection. We agreed on that.”

“Yes, but–”

“We. Agreed. Arthur, this is bigger than the two of us.”

Arthur leaned forward so that he was mere inches from your face, and you could see every detail of the despair that was in his expression. “No. There is nothing more important than you, not to me. I was not going to sit idly by when there was a chance you could have died.” He let go of your hand and instead caressed your face. He looked at you as though he were burning the image of your face into his memory, and you realized how near death you had truly been.

You put your hands over his and ran your thumbs over his knuckles. “I can’t say that I would be able to calm myself if anything had happened to you either, but we need to be more careful in the future. We must take into account the people we’ve entrusted our secret to. They will be able to help us far more than if we were alone.”

“I shudder at the thought of having my fate in Merlin’s hands,” Arthur teased.

“Oh, hush. You and I both know he’s far more capable than you give him credit for.”

“Don’t let him hear you. I’ll never live it down.”

You pressed a quick kiss to his lips, and a smile found its way to your face again as you looked into his eyes. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

A week passed before you had regained your strength enough to travel outside of the castle and back to your home in the lower town. When you had arrived back, you were surrounded by a crowd of grateful faces and cheers. You, the young girl who only worked in the tavern, became a hero in your own right. You’d cared for the people around you and fended off disease long enough for Gaius to find treatment through you.

Maybe not today, perhaps not even in a few months, but eventually, you and Arthur would no longer have to keep your relationship a secret. When that time came, you no longer doubted that the people would come to accept you. No matter your status, your care and concern were what set you apart, and if Uther was the only one that couldn’t see that, then so be it. You would wait until Arthur could decide for himself. Until then, you would keep your secret and bide your time.

#fanfic #fan fic #fan fiction #bbc merlin #merlin bbc #arthur pendragon #arthur pendragon x reader #arthur pendragon x you #arthur pendragon x y/n #fluff #comfort #arthur pendragon fluff #pov second person #no y/n #reader insert #lynn writes #prompt

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yanderederee · 1 year ago

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The theories that can be drawn up about Baji’s child life are infinite because nothing is canon. All predictions above are stictly that, predictions. At the end of the day, you’re right, Baji’s father has no narrative in the story. We know absolutely nothing about him. The only bit of info we have of him is that one screenshot above. We can only speculate the details.

I personally can’t see Baji having a father figure. Idk idk it’s rooted and can’t be helped. I think he really looked up to Shinichiro, and might have had some paternal/older brother guidance from the best big bro in town lol.

I think Baji’s father HAS to be a good person, no doubt in my mind. Maybe scary and brash, but hearty and genuine. This makes sense to me.

When I originally wrote this post, I had “Wolf Children”/“Fruits Basket” young couple vibes when imagining how Baji’s family:dad probably was.

Sticking to my headcanon that Mama and Papa Baji were both two delinquent youngsters who started a life together very young;

I first ever imagined PapaBaji as the type to sacrifice himself for his friends. It’s such a strong and determined trait to possess. Before his “gang days” were officially up, a particularly nasty fight (like with Pah!) could have gotten him put in jail, or my original thought process, he ran in headfirst, being hotheaded and brash like his son, and wasn’t as careful as he should have been, resulting in getting stabbed, caught at the wrong time, taken the fall for one of his buddies, etc..

The fact Baji is able to give his life so willingly for his gang makes me think he has a strong sense of justice and responsibility to take care of his friends and make sure they don’t go down the wrong path. He feels as though he had Failed Kazutora when he couldn’t stop him from what happened—- From overtime becoming delusional. Tried stopping Chifuyu from joining Toman because he worried that he would be dragged into something he wasn’t actually prepared to become apart of. (Keisuke mentioned how toman was getting too big, that meek people who think being in a motorbike gang is for fun, flock to Toman because they were only starting up, and Strong.)

Petition: Baji Keisuke deserves Time Leaping ability

﴾ When I said dead beat dad earlier, I meant it as a very broad statement for a plethora of “what-ifs”. I also can’t see Ryoko falling for a man who didn’t have the guts to finish what he started! ﴿

My second theory revolved around the movie ‘Wolf Children’; were the father ended up working himself past a limit in order to feed his family. Keisuke is a very protective person, a trait I think he takes after his father for. Ryoko is a little superstitious, and I think her husband’s influence helped make her feel a lot safer, a home in her angsty teenage feelings of woe.

If we think around the lines of Fruits Basket, maybe Ryoko and Papa Baji were going to have their happy ending with their healthy baby boy. Maybe they do, but the fact he is never even Once Mentioned, I’m not sure.

Think back on when Chifuyu was reporting to Baji about how his own father had died, and how he chooses to live his life. The same day, Keisuke finally agrees to letting Chifuyu attend a meeting. He was moved by Chifuyu’s story (anyone would be, I think it’s a very noble and tragic scene!). But it’s up to the reader to speculate his true reason for doing this.

Though, there is absolutely no shrine dedicated around Baji’s home. If we’re specifically speculating Alive!PapaBaji, it makes most sense to me that he is in the least, not in the picture. Ryoko does continue to wear her ring, so I would assume it isn’t by his father’s own choice. She still believes in him. So a timed sentence would make sense.

At the end of the day This is merely a Discussion Post. Let’s Keep It Light:)

¡暴走族\旧車會!ｘ!ヤンキ!ｘ! 助番¡

What is the New Generation of Delinquents?

~*,`¢

Tokyo Revengers plot circles around Bōsōzoku subculture, which is why I love it as deeply as I do.

Bōsōzoku culture derives/d from lower class Japanese youth who’ve banded together to express dissatisfaction with Japanese Society.

America is very familiar with countercultural movements lmao. Punk/Grunge/Metal/etc…

Youth are aimless, reckless, and rebellious.

If you’ve ever enjoyed the book The Outsiders by S.E Hinton , you know this is a prime example of brotherhood bonds between lower class hoodlums. In Oklahoma, of all places.

Otherwise known as; Yankii, Sukeban, Kyushakai.

Who is a Yankii?

The Rise and Fall of Bōsōzoku

When Bōsōzoku Youth evolve past crime, Kyushakai

#GirlGang: Sukēban<33

This article is really awesome in explaining cultural differences, feel free to read up on some if you’re interested.

Today I plan to point out a few:

Yankii Mothers / YanMaMa; Ryoko Baji

early ’90s, yankii men occasionally entered construction and teen women had children and dropped out of high school — both stereotypes that persist today. *The young yankii mothers — yan mama — were often ostracized by other mother groups and struggled to assimilate to their new identities as parents.

Within a year of publication, Yan Mama Comic had reached of circulation of 120,000, helping to bond socially isolated communities of young mothers.

…

NO DOUBT ABOUT IT FOLKS; Ryoko and Baji’sDad were definitely two yankii teens who fell in love and had a kid too young.

Headcanon! That Keisuke’s parents were set on making a badass life together, and be awesome young parents with the coolest and toughest new punk kid to add to the books!

…But, they were still two idiots. Baji’s father probably ran head first, sacrificing himself in one way or another, I’m sure.

This leads you to wonder ~..

How did everyone else come to this lifestyle?

What is Their Social Injustice?

(All headcanons but kinda factual,so…)

Mikey: all younger siblings admire their older brothers! Shinichiro was the leader of a biker gang, of course Mikey would want to follow in his footsteps! So Mikey’s reason soon turns to::

Shinichiro: By being a overall stand up guy, true to his word and genuine to a fault, he had a strength not a lot of people had. He welcomed friendships with BlackSheep, and made a home for them however he could. Strong ally’s stood by him and as long as he’s around, they would support his ideals in shaping a better future.

Draken: was literally born into it. Escorts have been judged and poorly treated left and right, taking care of yourself—with a child to boot; was hell for a women. Unwanted kids of “filth” aren’t usually welcomed in social circles. The Children bare the injustice of inconvenience. By living with escorts and witnessing first hand the “low-class work” so many have had to endure to make a decent way of life, Draken learned young that life was unfair. So to live, you have to make a way of life for yourself, unapologeticly.

Mitsuya: Poor kids are looked down on a lot. Made fun of for things they can’t control. Kids with jobs are looked down on for being in the working class so soon. With a mother who was never home, and taking care of two younger sisters, he needed strength to deal with how unfair his life was. Meeting Draken, and realizing that the struggle to survive and keep trying to have a family even when it’s hard, he started respecting his mother a lot more. He found a sense of belonging Toman…

Baji: also literally born into it. Grew up with a single mother who was looked down on for being young/dropping out of school. Supporting her as the only Man of the house, Keisuke takes after his mother’s confidence. He also is seen having an alternative sense of fashion, making me believe he is definitely a metal head.

Kazutora: dealt with a lot growing up. He was bullied for being a sheepish pushover. He was hit by his father for any level of individuality /expression of defiance. He was manipulated into always having to pick one right side, and that there was always one wrong side. He tries showing loyalty by giving everything he has to friendships that hurt him, without realizing friends shouldn’t hurt him. No matter who he was, there was never anyone he could just be a person with. Be a part of the perfect high status family you were born into, or face the punishments. He finds comfort when he finds a family he can trust and be a person who makes mistakes. Friends are meant to be treasured. And after meeting Baji, and joining Toman, he found somewhere he could belong.

Pah: I still need to look more into him I can’t lie.

Takemichi: Bozosoku culture is notorious for being social justice fighters, as the entire notion of a subculture is to defy societal injustice anyway. And that’s just who Takemitchi is; a friend to everyone.

Hinata: the prime example of Dating into the lifestyle. It’s easy to admire and possibly fall in love with people as passionate as rebellious, adrenaline junky teens. She’s empathetic to how others see Takemichi, knowing above all else, he loves her more than anything!

Emma: she never really got into being a part of the gang, but she was by association. All of her brothers. She’s always been the crown jewel of TokyoManji! But not only that; Emma isn’t fully Japanese. True, a lot of the cast is multinationality. But she has Mikey on her side. She is his family, and that makes her strong. Foreigners are often ostracized, easy to pick out due to her natural Blonde hair. (*blonde hair is also often an act of rebellion, she showing that she refuses to dye it black to fit in can also say a little about other issues-)

LETS NOT FORGET!!! TOMAN IS BUILD ON THE BACK OF “The Little guy who sticks up for the Weak”.

The series is based on what kind of world Manjiro Sano chooses to build. Every timeline is unintentionally set by his hand, because he is that powerful of a person. Because people follow him. Manjiro is the type of person who changes fates.

By losing Shinichiro; Manjiro loses Empathy.

Shinichiro was a charismatic and empathetic person, often putting differences aside to better the other person. He was a heavily respected person in the delinquent world of Japan as the founder of Black Dragon. He led Black Dragon with a humble heart and was treated with notable respect, while also being a big brother to all three of his siblings. Even though he was a weak fighter, he lead the Black Dragon with his immense charisma. Even years after his death, later generations of members still hold him in high regard.

A person like Shinichiro is the kind of man people follow. The Weak Guy sticking up for his friends; The One who Always Won..

In a subculture seeking structure, he is the perfect person to leading a generation of a kinder and more empathetic people.

So let’s wrap up the question!;

What is the New Generation of Delinquents?

!TO.MANji !!

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disobedient-sinners · 3 years ago

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6. Kabedon,

The ultimate move, deadly and paralyzing if used right.

I have a feeling the best Kabedons come from Diavolo, Lucifer, Mammon, Satan and Beel.

Like Diavolo whisk corner you unintentionally, and notice you flustering and towering over you hits the wall next to your head and leans in and eye level and heart racing mind racing blood pumping, he in the lowest deepest voice, “Humans are so interesting, getting flustered over little things.”

Lucifer, imo, punches the wall next to you and crACKS IF AND LEANS IN so fast and aggressively you think it’s the end until his feee hand takes your jaw making you look at him and he leans in and he can feel the heat on your face 💀

Mammon would do it out of spite or jealousy, he does what Kyo does to Toru in the original fruits basket series. In the middle of the RAD hallways staring down a group of demon boys who wanted to talk to you....

Satan, corners you in a library, confesses and does it out of jealousy after hearing Asmo saying if no one takes you he will. It’s intense, meaning full but also exciting when his free hand is on your jaw tilting you’re head up to kiss you gently 😌

Beel, I haven’t really though about it much but the mans a tank, he can corner you make you feel small and vulnerable and will get you flustered by just looking at you... has you falling to you’re knees squealing and covering your face,

These are my opinions anyways.... :) what do you think they would do?

it gets long so here!!

BROTHERS + DIAVOLO KABEDON

LUCIFER

Lucifer is the kind of person that knows what they're doing. If he knows Kabedon by name is a different story, but he for sure knows how to Kabedon. He's swift in his movements, though a bit rough. He's likely to slam his target against the wall a little harsher than he means to in the process, as well as he'll give them whiplash with how quickly his hand is by their head while he leans in with a smirk, but he for sure knows what he's doing!!

MAMMON

Mammon's kabedon is messy in a sense. He doesn't entirely know what he's doing and he probably saw it in one of Levi's anime episodes in passing. He thinks it flusters the target every time so he goes for it, but he ends up getting a darker flush than his partner in any case. He probably slams the wall and hurts his hand tbh. Over all clumsy and he ends up more embarrassed than anything, brushing it off with quick words of denial.

LEVI

Levi knows exactly what he's doing when it comes to the idea of kabedon, but performing? He gets so flustered- his whole face turns red and he cant even look his target in the eyes. He'll go in with uncertainty, hand coming gently against the wall, but beyond that? He's a bit too easily flustered, finding it hard to continue any further. To be fair, it is a very compromising position- he did his best! Or, well, tries to do his best.

ASMO

If anyone can kabedon efficiently, it's Asmo dearest. He's swift in his ministrations as well as delicate, careful to be sure everything is just perfect before he uses his free hand to lift his target's chin to look at him. He draws his lips close to theirs, lids lowering as he observes his target. As they flush darker a smirk crawls onto his face. He knows that they can feel the fan of his breath over their lips, his sweet strawberry perfume taking control of their senses. He'll leave them that way, too, flustered and confused.

HERE IS WHERE I REALIZED U HAVE SPECIFIC CHARACTERS LMAOO

SATAN

Satan is another one who has an idea of what they are doing when it comes to performing a kabedon, though he is also a bit clumsy and refuses to admit it. He's a bit too quick as well as eager to get his lips onto those of his target. Because of this it's so quick that you can't even process what's going on as you're caged and kissed all within a few seconds. It's a thoughtless activity, done on whim rather than with intent to fluster as most do. It's quite a pain to watch, really- Satan just wants to kiss and is impatient about it.

BEEL

Beel is a bit confused by the prospect. Sure, he can carry it out, but he's oblivious to the reaction that his target has. It's very rare for Beel to kabedon, but when he does it's a slower process as he more falls into it and plays it off as intentional. He cages his target between his arms, and without much thought, he looks down at them. He thinks they're almost angelic and he can't help but to press a kiss to their lips. It's usually done when he's done a hard workout and is too sluggish for much else, but it still effects his target as well as it's supposed to <3

BELPHIE

Belphie knows and chooses to use the traditional kabedon as a weapon. He'll fluster his target beforehand with not so innocent touches and words before he performs his action, face inches from his target's as a smirk blooms on his handsome features. He enjoys the power that he gets from a kabedon in his fashion, and his free hand might just run along his target's body before he grabs their chin and pulls them into a kiss.

DIAVOLO

I think Diavolo would be more confused about the reaction than anything. It entirely happened by chance, and he chuckles at the blush that blooms across his target's face. It's cute, what can he say! While he doesn't understand why it flusters you so much, he'll continue to do it whenever he gets the chance just to see that pretty flush that tints your cheeks each time that he does it.

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essaysofanime · 2 years ago

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Fruits Basket: A meaningful ending

So, I finished watching Fruits Basket and I can confidently say that is an emotional masterpiece. The character writing is so well done that made me feel like this people were real and their trauma and development were straight out of reality. That's why I find this show so relatable to anyone, because we all have the struggles and difficulties portrayed in this anime and we can also heal from those with the right people around us.

But now I want to talk about the ending and its beautiful meaning.

First of all I want to say that this is a happy ending but is not fully happy for everybody. I think that the creator did a fantastic job at writing the ending of Fruits Basket because is not that stereotypical ending of every tragic story like this, where all the couples are happy together.

For example, Kagura is happy for Kyo and Tohru, but deep in her heart she still loves Kyo and is kinda sad for her to see the person that she loves the most doesn't love her back in the same way. As she speaks to Ritsu and knows that he wants to get married to Mitsuru she realises that all those around her have someone that cares for them, only she remains left out.

I think this is a beautiful touch to the story beacause it shows that even if the curse is broken, it doesn't mean that all end happily. Some of the Sohmas have to find themselves the happiness.

Another good example is Kureno. After all the curse was broken he didn't wanted to stay. Instead he began to travel and see the world even if he had Uotani waiting for him. He followed his dreams after all these years when he spent most of his life on the Sohma Estate.

Rin's ending shows that she is not fully healed and has a long way to go until she will be happy again. The moment when Akito imprisoned her and cut her hair impacted her the most and if you mix it with the childhood trauma that she had you can figure out how much Rin had suffered throughout the series.

However, Hatsuharu is there for her and supports her on her way to healing.

Momiji is another character that doesn't have a relatively sweet ending. He is optimistic, though and wishes to get a girlfriend and to make Kyo jelous (of course, not in a serious way).

The next characters I REALLY want to talk about are Akito and Shigure.

Their relationship is really messed up and all that Shigure does is to manipulate Akito into wanting him more. After the curse is broken. Akito changes very much and feels guilty for all that she have done to the other members, but she still can't apologize to them. She is literally a very bruised character, maybe the most bruised of all. Towards the end, Akito starts to show more of her vulnerable side, a side that had been hidden under a mask of anger. Akito still has a long, long way to go until she will recover from her personal trauma and the trauma caused by her actions and I think she will never heal completely especially if she has Shigure besides her.

Shigure is the manipulative kind of character who will play with your emotions and feelings and this is pretty much what he does to Akito. He knows when Akito is vulnerable and knows when to play his game to get what he wants and this makes him a VERY intelligent character (after all...he is the one who planned everything). (I’ll make a character analysis soon, I promise)

Shigure ISN’T a good match to Akito, is probably the WORST MATCH FOR HER! She needs someone who can be empathetic to her, who can hug her and understand her sadness and Shigure isn't the best one at doing that.

Personally, I think that the author did a great job at putting in the story a toxic relationship, because not everything is sugar and honey and this is what this show portrays: that life is not all light, there are ups and downs, but at the end we all reach for the Sun.

(Sorry for any bad English...)

#Fruits Basket #furuba #fb #happy ending #akito sohma #shigure sohma #kagura sohma #kureno #tohru honda #rin sohma #character development #character analysis #essay #analysis #anime #meaning #movie analysis

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astaroth1357 · 4 years ago

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Demigod MC Series: Demeter

Have I been using this series to vicariously punish Belphie for the events of Season 1? I cannot confirm nor deny that statement.

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter

Lucifer

Didn't think too much of the "human" when they popped out of the portal. Sure they had a straw hat and a huge basket full of produce but it wasn’t like they were… Wait… No… Were they…?

Oh no. Oh nonononono, this is not good…!!

Demeter is notoriously doting and protective of her children (see her freakout and breakdown after Hades abducted of Persephone as proof) and they've pretty much done the EXACT. SAME. THING. here!!

It was a mad scramble by him and Diavolo to contact and appease their godly Mother Bear before she came roaring down to Devildom herself to turn them all into barley. Thankfully, Zeus must have intervened at some point because though she was indeed PISSED, she didn't threaten to barge in… yet.

She made one thing very clear. Bend so much as a single hair on her precious child's head and there would be WAR…

The MC received a 24 hour security detail after that. Just Mammon wasn't going to cut it, he needed NO chances. It was a full rotation of Mammon, him and Beel for the entirety of their stay (Asmo and Levi both threw hissy fits at the prospect of babysitting, Satan couldn’t be trusted not to kill them just to irritate him, and Belphie was out for… obvious reasons).

In some ways, it wasn’t so bad. The MC was a very mild sort of person, rather even tempered. He’d dare say they were pleasant, mostly content to just tend to their gardens and be out in the moonlight…

But the problem was, he just could not convince them to stay OUT of nature. Including the forests, which were full of hellish beasts fully intent on gnawing their flesh from their bones… and their specialty was plants, not animals, sooo…

Their habit of sneaking out to wander the woods got so bad that he very nearly considered pulling a Belphie 2 and locking them in the basement for their own good. But Devil knows what damage their mother would do if she found out…

At least they make for pleasant company… And Diavolo seems to like them quite a bit himself so the mortal gets a pass from him. Now if they’d only consider their own safety for a change…

Mammon

They make him a KILLING.

Like, no seriously. Their produce is insane!! He’s never tasted food so good, especially stuff that’s come fresh from the ground! It only took a few berries for Mammon to throw on a straw hat himself and start harvesting! He’s a farmer now, baby!!

Weeellll not quite. He’s still absolutely only in it for the money, but anything he brings to a farmer’s market goes so fast that he can hardly care about the labor! He’s never made this much Grimm in his life!! And it’s totally legit for a change!

He bought himself another car, paid off half of his debt, and even got Levi back that 2 or 3 grand he leant him centuries ago. Really, Mammon’s living his best life and it’s all thanks to MC!

It’s a good thing his blatant grifting doesn’t hurt his relationship with them at all, in fact they seem to enjoy having his help regardless. They bring him drinks on hot days or invite him on picnics and stuff, it’s… it’s really sweet. They’re very nice to him and he appreciates it…

But… COULD YA JUST STAY PUT ALREADY???

It drives him INSANE that they won’t stay out of dangerous places!! After he started caring about them for more than just a meal ticket it only got even worse!!

He’s not usually one for monitoring someone’s every move (that kind of control freak behavior is more a Lucifer thing) but he eventually had to set up familiars around the House just to keep them from sneaking out at night...

What was so interesting out there anyway?? There wasn’t any kind of plant that he could bring them himself! They didn’t have any need to be out there!!

They’d keep telling him they’d be fine but it’s not like he’s going to actually buy that. They were too… nice to be dangerous or anything so why would he believe them?

No more running off, MC! Please, he’s beggin’ ya!!

Leviathan

Wait, gardening? Like, being outdoors and stuff? Ew. No thanks, he’ll pass.

That was more or less his first reaction when they showed up and it never really got much better than that…

He admits that they’re friendly and it’s not like he dislikes them or anything, but their thing so far from his thing that they just don’t have a lot in common… you know?

For starters, they get So. Antsy. when they’re inside for too long! He tried to invite them to a marathon once, but they could hardly keep still and kept looking around like they were searching for a window… He said, “to jump out of.” They insisted just for some fresh air, but he didn’t buy it...

They’re nice enough to listen to his rants, but they’re barely ever inside for him to do so and like HELL is he going to leave his room and stand around out there for that long. Ranting is at least a one to two hour engagement! What if he gets hot out there? And have you SEEN Devildom bees?? Hell no!!

He has, however, asked them on multiple occasions to reproduce flowers he’s seen in different anime, especially ones that have a very unique look and they’ve done some real wonders with that!

He can now claim to be the only person to ever own a Ruby-Jade Vine plant, straight from the pages of TSL when it was used to brew tea for the Lord of Lechery during his brief illness and-is anyone even still listening anymore?

The point is, it’s a flower so rare it was imaginary but now HE has it!... or had it for about a week until his utter incompetence of all things plant killed it…

He begged the MC for another but they were out of the plants they needed to make it and would have to go back to the human world to find more… He’s still mourning his loss… Poor Henry 4.0…

Satan

Well… He’s called this MC “salt of the Earth” and he does truly mean it. Take of that what you will.

He doesn’t get much in the way of intellectual conversation out of this mortal UNLESS he’s talking about plants, farming, or botany… Interesting topics and complex in their own right to be sure, but that’s pretty much their wheelhouse and they like it there.

That being said, the feats that they can perform are genuinely mind-blowing! They are the ONLY person he has ever met who can cultivate the Devildom’s own ultra-rare Phantom Orchid, a plant only blooms when it reaches a perfect state of undeath (i.e. both taken care of and neglected just enough so that it's only barely alive. The balance is so tricky to master that one hasn’t bloomed down there for centuries!)

There’s also something just genuinely relaxing about watching them work or helping them in the gardens… More so than he’d ever expected from such a simple activity.

He admits that he’s taken quite a few strolls through the flower-filled courtyard of the Demon Lord’s Castle just to admire its beauty... But anything that they can grow just blows all of that out of the water!

They even taught him several magic botanical techniques so now he can grow some pretty mad plants himself. Lucifer never expected to find that giant Venus Flytrap in his closet, but one was there regardless. 😏

Just… out of curiosity one day, he asked the MC if they could make him a new kind of catnip. Not for any nefarious reason! You know… just for research purposes…

The nip they made was so effective that the House grounds were FILLED with nipped-up cats for a whole month! He was in Heaven!! (and Lucifer practically wiped those plants from existence so he couldn’t get any more… asshole...)

That must have inspired them because they apparently made a demons-only version that they told him about WELL after the fact. Had he known, he probably would have burned the stuff on principle... Do you know how dangerous demon-nip could be to them? Experiment responsibly, MC!

Asmodeus

Ehhhh, gardening SOUNDS like one of those things that should be super Devilgram-able, but then you realize how sweaty and dirty you get in the process and it’s a huge turn off… Sorry MC.

When they first came down to the Devildom, he thought two things: 1) Such a sweet little flower child, as adorable as they were, would never survive; and 2) even if they could, he would never ever see eye-to-eye with them on the “wonders” of getting all up in the dirt.

Well, he was right about 2, but certainly not 1. Personally, he thinks his brothers worry about them too much, they ARE still a demigod.

At one point he saw a pack of hellhounds almost trample one of their vegetable gardens and they lost it. Word to the wise, never try to take on a child of Demeter in their own garden. Those hounds were wrapped up in rose vines before they could even yelp...

Yeah, the MC would be fine.

That being said, while everybody else clamors over their produce, he thinks that their flowers are really where it’s at!

Taking just five minutes in one of their gardens is something else... He’s never seen blossoms as healthy and immaculate in all the Devildom before! Their beauty could (almost) rivals his own! What they do isn’t just a hobby, it’s an art.

He’s taken multiple pictures with their blossoms and they go viral every time. It’s so rare to actually see gorgeous, petal-filled flowers in the Devildom, most of the native plants are of the man-eating variety.

His only complaint about this MC is that they seem to feel much more at home in work clothes and dirt than they do in any sort of party-look he tries to give them… Cute as they are, they can afford to gussy up sometimes can’t they? Mud and grass stains don’t make for a good look, sorry.

Beelzebub

Beel gardens and the MC gardens as well. Add on that they seem to be able to grow all manner of fruits and veggies and he likes this one. A lot.

They had just finished apple-picking when the portal nabbed them so they had a massive basket of apples at the time. Naturally, Beel more or less stole the thing on sight, but the apples inside were so juicy and good that he almost shook them down for more on the spot!

Imagine his surprise when they, half pleadingly, explained to him that if he got them some seeds they could just grow more… and it wouldn’t even take that long.

To be clear, the formula he saw was this: Get seeds > bring seeds to mortal > mortal grows seeds > mortal makes endless supply of food….

Congratulations MC, you’ve now earned the sixthborn’s eternal loyalty after a grand total of… two minutes. He didn’t even know their name, but he was willing to take a bullet for them (provided he got more of those apples).

The next several months were spent with Beel attached to them to the hip in some way, but honestly? It was just so wholesome anyway…

If he’s helping in the garden, he never complains. He does most of the heavy lifting and actually likes being out there with them (unlike others...)

Many afternoons were spent sitting under fruit trees and talking. Sometimes, they go to the trouble of preparing a picnic or something but it would always inevitably end with Beel plucking the whole tree clean of whatever ripe (or unripe) fruit he can get his hands on with a smile.

The MC never minded though. That’s just another excuse to grow more, right?

His only problem was when the MC would sneak out to the forest… especially when they get too antsy and just go alone.

He HATES it when they do that! How is he supposed to keep them safe if they just wander off?? He knows that they have a special connection to nature and all, but it isn’t safe…

He’s flown in and scooped them back up to the House on numerous occasions and his “talking tos” get sterner after every rescue... Please stay put, MC! He’d have so many reasons to be sad if you were eaten… 😔

Belphegor

Okay, he was looking for a capable, if not gullible, human. Not a shoeless flower hippy!

He honestly wasn't expecting much out of this one... Damn their little heart because they did genuinely believed his lies, it’s just that they weren't… well… They were really good at gardening.

… And it grew kind of hard to keep hating them whenever they'd show up just to give him fresh berries or a bouquet to see him smile… He may claim that his heart is made of nightmares and orphan tears, but who doesn’t enjoy being given a batch of flowers?

Damn their sweetness too… Right to here.

When it came time to kill them he had a heavier heart than he thought he would, but kind of saw it like putting down the sacrificial lamb. Gotta be done to reach better goals... Stiff upper lip and all that.

Unfortunately for him, they had taken to carrying packets of demon-nip with them as a self-defense measure…

He wasn’t exactly sure what he expected when they shouted “Get nipped!” at him mid-attack, but it wasn’t a face full of some smelly herb! Like, really smelly…! Actually, that smelt kind of good… Hold on.

Turns out murderous rage really doesn’t last long after you get what is effectively ultra-strong catnip thrown in your face. They ended up having to go and tell Lucifer what happened themselves because Belphie was way too blissed out on the floor to do anything... They were legitimately worried they might have fried his brain...

He’s told the effects of the demon-nip lasted three days. He doesn’t know, because he hardly remembers any of it... They described him as like he was high on “weed” and “ecstasy” at the same time but he doesn’t know what either of those are either so it wasn’t helpful…

Truthfully, they were so nice to him while he was recovering that he couldn’t even be mad afterwards so all's well that ends well? Either way, he’s sleeping under their orchard trees from now on. It’s peaceful out there...

They burnt all that nip though. It’s some strong stuff...

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me demigods #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios

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