#doctors can go just die at this point

[yrfemmehusband]

This post is about physical illness physical disability please don't derail

Me vs being consistently retraumatized in literally every single fucking appointment i go to me vs getting literally one singular fucking doctor to listen to me oh my god I cannot stand doctors. Literally every single doctor I've been to with maybe two exceptions has done nothing but gaslit me and made it difficult for me to get care. It doesn't matter who they are what practice it does not matter if they're a man or woman cishet or LGBT with pronouns on their website, it doesn't matter if they're "trauma informed" or have never heard of the term. They are all the same. They all make it their goal to be as much of an obstacle to receiving care as possible. They refuse to listen because they're so much smarter than any patient that walks through the door and simultaneously expect you to have googled your symptoms and to have an idea of what tests you want and also if you've done that then you're Malingering or you're called doctor Google or made fun of for thinking you could possibly do their job (diagnosing you.) If you have any issue worse than the common cold they'll slap you with an anxiety diagnosis or a "we don't know what causes it" disorder. If you ask for more tests than one singular blood panel they'll laugh and ask why. If you ask what your options for treatment are they'll tell you to lose weight and exercise, and also here are some antidepressants. They'll tell you to come back if symptoms continue or worsen and act surprised when you do, because the symptoms continued and worsened. It doesn't matter how you look, how nice you are, how sick you feel, how much pain you're in. Their goal is to get your money and get you out. I have never met a doctor who wasn't blinded by their own ego and most people who think doctors are there to help you have never been sick with anything long term.

[rudnitskaia]

yay a week until my 29th bday ✨🔥😎🔥✨

[izzyspussy]

we went over the 14yr long torture session in my last therapy visit actually, and i told her that toward the end i was fantasizing about and then actively considering walking into traffic because if i got catastrophically injured then they would have to treat my pain. and she told me that's not an uncommon thing for people to do. that she has heard that many times before.

like think about that. we are so moralistic about drug use and have politicized a particular type of medicine so much, and doctors are so uncompassionate toward and even suspicious of patients who are in pain because of it, that it's NOT UNCOMMON for people who are otherwise not suicidal to start completely genuinely longing to get hit by a fucking car just for the chance to be oh so graciously provided the absolute bare fucking minimum of care.

think about how many different things have pain as a symptom. how many things have pain as the only symptom the patient is aware of. how many of them are life or death crises. heart attacks. blood clots. strokes. bleeding ulcers. those are just what i can think of off the top of my fucking head, AND I'M NOT A FUCKING DOCTOR.

what i had, for example, feels exactly like appendicitis. and they left it for fourteen years because my only symptom was excruciating pain and i didn't fit their stupid little (completely unsupported by evidence, btw) diagnostic mnemonic. if it had been appendicitis, or anything else as immediately deadly that "just" hurts, i would have fucking died the same night i got sent home from the emergency room with "medical" "advice" to take some tylenol and rest - for the first time, that is. out of dozens. how many people do die that way?

because addicts are Bad. and because doctors are too arrogant and biased to practice medicine on the basis of evidence and informed consent when the profit model and conservative propaganda make it soooo easy to stay in the good old days of paternalism instead.

[third-doctor]

I feel like I'm going insane. That episode read to me as a lot more tragic than other people are reading it. Yeah they were racist and rich and spoiled and awful but they were just kids. They were all just kids. Lindy was absolutely terrified throughout the whole thing and clinging desperately to what she knew, which was terrible. They could've had the chance to learn and become better but they chose to go die and it's infuriating and tragic because nobody deserves that. Nobody deserves to be eaten by slugs or die of exposure in the woods. Nobody deserves to suffer like that. But they chose it rather than let the Doctor help them because they'd rather stay in their rich white supremacist bubble and he just wants to help and there's nothing he can do.

Maybe it's because one of my core beliefs is that nobody deserves death and suffering. Nobody. Even the worst person on earth can learn from their mistakes and come back and change and everyone deserves that chance. There's no such thing as too late. But they're never going to get that chance because they actively rejected it and to me that's still very, very sad.

[mylittleredgirl]

great news for mylittleredgirl survival enthusiasts: i stopped taking that stimulant med today and now at 5 pm i can finally sit up without feeling like my heart or eyes will explode :) unfortunately not taking it also means the severe fatigue is back so i don't want to sit up anyway. still a net positive i suppose.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

13/15 is fun right bc he needs to be touched so so so bad bc she basically touch starved herself to death and she neeeeeeeeeeeds his body she Needs his body but no way in a million years do they have the framework to interpret that need as what it is so they assume it's sexual, right? it's gotta be. i need to be inside you bc i need to be touched bc im my own type bc the trust issues are Dire so just fuck me until ive forgotten im a person or remembered how to be one. right?

until one day like weeks months way longer than it should be into this self-destructive self-actualisation self-care routine theyre lying on the floor of the console room catching their breath and she goes "do you think.....do you think pythia's curse is still in effect or is this gonna be a problem"

and hes like "fuck! susan"

[minnieposting]

Uugghhhhhhhhhhhh why do autism evaluations have to be so complicated

[baekuras]

Resident Evil really makes me wanna become an unhinged scientist creating horrors beyond our comprehension yet made of our own flesh and maybe a sprinkle of virus/parasite/mold in it to give it some extra ooomph

[cicidraws]

i miss how i felt before this year.

[anotherpapercut]

so anyway I woke up multiple times last night bc of coughing fits and I've been coughing all fucking day and I was just standing outside on my porch trying to like chill before going from job 1 to job 2 and i coughed so hard I threw up. how's everyone else doing this afternoon

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[kirishwima]

yup. im gonna quit

[lunar-fey]

ohhhh my god. okay. so. my aunt does like, she buys random junk in bulk from retail wholesalers and then resells it on like, facebook marketplace and ebay and stuff. whatever. so my mom works for her. makes a flat $50 a day, regardless of the fact that shes disabled and doing hard labor for at least 8 hours a day, often 10+. and min wage here is $10 an hour but mom argued that $50 a day is still more than what she would make working the same hours at an actual job because of taxes...like girl that would be 50% taxes. you do not pay that fucking much. so thats already Bad.

but today mom shows me a video of a knife theyre gonna sell, and i watch 2 seconds and i realize its an automatic knife, and i tell her hey. thats illegal to possess in this state. let alone sell! and mom is like ohhh [aunt] knows what shes doing itll be fine.... we sell knives on there all the time she just doesnt put pictures and calls them something else on the listing to get around fb/ebays policies :)

LIKE. HELLO. THATS NOT BETTER. YOURE COMMITTING MULTIPLE CRIMES. *AS YOUR JOB.* and she was just like "its not a big deal she knows what shes doing." folks, this is the same aunt that, very illegally, paid me to sort through her clients confidential tax documents and bank records and stuff. because she works for a bank. and took the records home to sort them. i dont think she DOES know what shes doing, actually!

[firstofficerkittycat]

the way when i was 13 rings of akhaten destroyed me mentally (derogatory) and then i rewatched it to make that edit expecting to feel the same way and am now coming back to That Scene like 8 times a day and it is destroying me mentally (affectionate)

[quietwingsinthesky]

most frustrating part of writing a doctor who oc is that the doctor and the master will both sometimes just fuck off and do their own thing for a hundred years and be unfazed by it because they are functionally immortal. and i can’t stick my oc with them because they’ll just. die. so what, do i just put them in a pen until those guys get back? spruce up their enclosure while they’re waiting to get picked up to go on adventures again?

[mynameisbillandimaheadcase]

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