#do you get the reference haha dying

[mangk0]

Crazy what happens to a kid with the end of the world on their shoulders - angsty atreus for this evening :]

[lizardho]

A rant I wrote for my best friend in 2020-ish - now she's my wife and is gonna be like "Why did you post this instead of working on your dissertation?" and the answer is because I'm procrastinating silly stylez

Mormon Missions

The Basis of Mormon Missionary Work

              Mormons, like many evangelical religions, proselyte as a core part of their religious activities. They claim (accurately) that early Christians did the same thing, and that scripture tells followers of Christ to do the same thing. So it’s a pretty big deal to them. When the Mormon church was first founded, missionary work was seen as an excited thing for Mormon men to do. The first prophet, Joseph Smith, would go visit people or invite them to his home, and tell them personally where God wanted them to go preach. They’d take a crate of copies of The Book of Mormon and go to close places (like New York or the American  South), or they’d go to far-away places, like England, Scotland, and Ireland.

Early missionaries were wildly successful, mainly because people the world was in sort of a religious frenzy at the time, and also the internet didn’t exist. They’d convert a few hundred people, tell them to move to Missouri, then continue on their merry way, going for a few years at a time before returning home as heroes. It was sees as a fun, manly way to abandon your family for a few years to go to England and sell books. After a while, though, Joseph Smith started getting too horny. At first, he was content to fuck the babysitter and some single ladies, telling them that God gave them the thumbs up, so it was cool. After a while, he got even hornier, and decided it was about time he fucked some married women. So he’d send the husbands of the hottest MILFs in his congregation to England for a few years, and then marry and fuck their wives while they were gone.

Sometimes, he’d tell them (“Oh, haha, hey, funny story, while you were in England because God told you to go there, your wife tripped and fell on my penis, and God said it was part of his plan, and I was into it, so we just went with it”) and sometimes he DIDN’T tell them. One guy he told got pretty mad about it, and he and his wife packed up and left Missouri, set up shop in a nearby town, and then made a newspaper. They printed the hot headline “Joseph Smith says God wants him to fuck your wives” and Joseph was like “Oh hey, let’s not let people in on that”. A mob of Mormon acolytes, who may or may not have been cucked by Joe the Prophet, also got upsetti spaghetti and burned down the printing press. Joseph then pardoned them, and was backed by the Nauvoo Legion, the 2nd largest military force in the U.S. at the time, and 100% Mormon. This was bad because a) Arson is a felony, commonly referred to as a “dick move”, and b) This violates the bill of rights, which guarantees freedom of the press. So Joseph was arrested. In jail, he was killed by an angry mob, and a new guy took over the Mormon church. His name was Brigham Young, and he was hornier than Joseph, who in turn was hornier than God had ever intended for anyone to be. Brigham took up the proud tradition of ignoring consent and ethical polyamory, and just sending men on far-away missions so he could spread his seed like a shitty incel-gone-rogue Genghis Khan.

After a while, missionary work stopped. Mainly, it stopped because of World War I. Then, the depression his the world like a starvation-inducing meteor, and missionary work slowed down a bit. Fortunately, the great depression ended! Because WWII started and everyone started dying again, so like, it was more of a lateral move. After WWII, though, the U.S. was suddenly a financial superpower with access to more of the world that it had previously had. So they started shipping missionaries off all over. It was still done by “calling”, where local congregation leaders would feel inspired to send people on missions, and then they would do that.

At some point in the 50s, an attempt was made to standardize missionary teachings a little bit, since the church was dealing with issues about people teaching weird stuff, like women having rights (the church still teaches that women shouldn’t work unless single or their husband is struggling to provide, and operates proudly on a “barefoot and pregnant” model of women’s rights that they teach very strongly to everyone from the ages of about 4 until 18), black people not being inferior (this was taught until the 70s), and tithing not being important (the church currently has over $100 billion in stocks and real-estate that we know of, it’s probably more).

So they made a tiny booklet with a basic summary of canon Mormon doctrine. Then, later, in the 70s, there was a HUGE push to get more missionaries. The phrase “every worthy, able-bodied young man should serve a mission” was used, and is still used, to describe who is expected to “serve” a mission. As they started this movement, they also began making rigid lesson plans, called “The Discussions” that missionaries needed to stick to. They were roughly 30 minutes long, relied on rote memorization, and were inflexible. At first, these were a big hit and people had a lot of success, but as education in the world improved, and more people were given access to schooling, technology, and financial stability, suddenly numbers began to plummet. So they changed the game plan: Make the lessons less structured, then blame missionaries personally for failure to convert people. These changes produced a book called “Preach My Gospel”, which was what I used as a missionary. They changed it again recently, but not by much, it’s just more simplistic. Like going from 3.5 to 5e.

- https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/new-era/1981/05/president-kimball-speaks-out-on-being-a-missionary?lang=eng

- https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics/missionary-work?lang=eng

My own missionary experience

Basics of Mission Structure

-Mormon congregations are called “Wards”, which get sorted into “Stakes”, which is a group of 5-10 wards.

-A mission is made when there is a certain ratio of stakes-to-non Mormons.

-A mission is split when there are too many Mormons in an area. So like, my dad’s mission has been split 5 or 6 times now into smaller missions because of how rapidly the church grew in those areas.

-Transfers: A transfer cycle is 6 weeks long, and you stay with your assigned companion for at least that whole cycle, sometimes 2-3 cycles.

 One of the things to note (that you may have kinda picked up on already) is that being a missionary is kind of an exalted “rite of passage” thing. They view missionary work as an act of service to the world at large, and thing that missionaries are comparable to like…soldiers or doctors, heroes who are saving people from the forces of evil or spiritual sickness. It’s a weird mindset to be in, and it really gets pushed on you, especially as a missionary. Missionary work is pushed on young men as a spiritual obligation (note: They can’t force you to go, so it’s not like an actual obligation, but it’s definitely perceived as such for a lot of people). So, since I was a young “man” they started pushing it on me at like…12? A little younger? My grandpas both went on missions, so they thought that it would be great if I did too. My dad went on a mission (He went to Argentina’s southern end). It just kinda seemed like the thing everyone did, except I didn’t really want to go. I wanted to get married and have kids, but like…’f’ in the chat, I guess. Uterus machine broke.

I just ignored the general discomfort I felt about missionary work (like the general discomfort I felt about a lot of things tbh), and went to BYU like a good l’il Mormon. I turned down a 10k/year scholarship from ASU to go to BYU, because I am an idiot. At BYU, I made good friends, one of whom was trans!!! But she transferred away after coming out :c  But I had a D&D group!!! But they all left on missions :c  So I decided that if it was between being the only 20 year old on BYU campus who didn’t go on a mission, or going on a mission, I’d go. That was literally my process. Please make fun of dumb boy me, please, he deserves it. Anyways, I put in my papers, the prophets and apostles in Salt Lake sign me up with a big batch of elders going to Mexico City North. Mexico City is HUGE, so it’s broken down into 6 separate missions with 6 separate mission leaders. I was in the northernmost areas of Mexico City, including parts of Hidalgo. Chronologically, my mission went like this:

Months 1-6: Zone – Tultepec  |  Congregation Name – Primavera

-Companions: Elder Luis (my trainer): Chubby, kinda annoying but honestly just a sweetheart who liked to eat.

-Elder Mendez (my follow-up trainer): Chubby, good cook, seems nice at first but a bit unhinged. Threatened to kill me a few times. Kinda moody. Mostly just mean and dumb.

àIn this area, me and Elder Luis baptized: Ricardo Frias, who is no longer a member. Veronica, Alejandra, and Brenda, who are still members. Me and elder Mendez baptized Karen Itzel, who I have not been able to catch up with in years. She’d be about 14 now, tho? She was really little when she joined.

àStories: Nothing weird happened in a paranormal sense, but I did get robbed twice in my first week here, which was fun. There was a place in this area called Infonavit that was like a little neighborhood. There was a gang that controlled the area, but they were nice to missionaries, so we never got held up or bothered by them. Still, I did see 2 men with Uzis once just…walking around. Like. In broad daylight. It was incredible.

Months 6-10.5: Zone – Tula  |  Congregation Name – El Carmen

-Companions: Elder Lopez (my best companion): Short, very dark (from Chiapas, so like…very dark for a Mexican), shredded. The man had a 6 pack. Also, intimidatingly intense. After the first lesson we taught together, we were walking away and he belted out “ELDER HOBBS! I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT!” and I was all intimidated because he sounded like a drill sergeant, and despite being a foot taller and about 60 lbs heavier than him, he scared me. So I was like “What?” and he just goes “THAT WAS SO GOOD. YOU ARE A GIFTED TEACHER. I AM LUCKY TO BE ASSIGNED WITH YOU. WE’RE GONNA DO GOOD THINGS HERE.” And anyway he was the best. He cooked every day, he let me play D&D (by myself, so sad lonely hours, but still, it was stress relief). He worked out in a frenzy, had a miserable homelife, and was really just a very nice and supportive person.

-Elder Amador: Tall, really into soccer (had played semiprofessionally for Cruz Azul, as like a minor league player or something). Funny, aggressively cheerful, kind of a wimp. Farted a LOT for some reason, so we’d always take detours down the “less travelled” roads so he could fart in private. I didn’t mind tho because the area was actually really pretty, and sometimes I could see cows 🥺

- In this area, we didn’t baptize anyone. Which was fine with me.

- Stories: So, this is the area where I learned to make guacamole. We were visiting in on an elderly couple nobody had seen in forever. They lived in the BOONIES, like, it was just NOTHING on all sides, and when they answered the door they invited us in, and made us eggs with hotdogs, and then the best goddamn guacamole I’ve ever had in my life. I ate until I was sick.

-ALSO in the area: A supernatural (ish) story: So, Mormons believe that they have “priesthood power”, which is like divine power from God to effectuate his will on earth. This is stuff like healing the sick (never seems to work), causing miracles, summoning angels, and other bullshit that never actually happens. Sometimes people ask for priesthood blessings, usually if they’re sick or if they’re sad and want to feel better. So a guy in our ward flags us down, says he’s feeling iffy, and asks for a blessing. We had nothing else to do, so…sure! Why not? My companion, Elder Lopez, does it, and immediately after he says “amen” the guy starts puking SUPER hard. He stops, looks at us, and says “I cannot feel the left half of my body” and I was like “Hey elder, this guy is gonna die, let’s go get help” so we went basically next door to the home of the one guy in the area that had a car, told him what was happening, and then headed to the hospital. He stopped breathing twice on the way, and Brother Ricardo (the guy with the car) didn’t know CPR, so instead he just hulk-smashed his chest with arms about as thick as my legs, and that seemed to work. Funny stuff.

Months 10.5-15 – Zone: Nicolas Romero  |  Congregation name: Nicolas Romero

-Companions: Elder Casillas (the funnest companion): Fat. Very fat. Lazy, but we still managed to get more done than with anyone else. He was hilarious, and SUPER smart.

-Elder Montini: Originally form Argentina, immigrated to Mexico as a kid, then lived in Cancún. ¼ Italian, and Argentines are pretty white, so he looked American. He also spoke flawless English, and used this ability to shit talk people without them knowing. Also, VERY fat. Like. IN one day he ripped 3 pairs of pants just by sitting down. Kinda “holier-than-thou” but not too bad usually.

-In this area, we baptized NOBODY. Which was GREAT because this ward was actually the woooooorst. I fucking hated everyone in that Ward. They had about 80 people who attended regularly, but 900 people on record, and all 820 people NOT in attendance could tell you exactly why they left, and it was always because one of the shitty 80 had been excessively rude to them. There were 3 good people in that ward, and they all moved away eventually, so…yikes.

- No weird stories from here, but I did get in big trouble for breaking mission rules to… (checks notes)… provide service to elderly widows, so that was fun.

Months 15-21 Zone: Huehuetoca  |  Congregation name: Xalpa

-Companions: Elder Lucero: Total sweetheart, VERY shy. I cured his shyness by annoying him, since apparently feeling angry made him just rash enough to actually speak, so I just kept him lightly agitated with me for a few weeks until he realized he was good at what he did. He’s probably my favorite companion. We actually got along REALLY well.

-Elder Ramirez: Very nice, VERY fun, has a VERY cute sister. We got along well.

-In this area, the ward was HORRIBLE. Nobody liked each other, and everyone was shitty to us, too. We made our way into the ward’s good graces by getting on the good side of the women’s group, then berating their husbands about how shitty they were. The girls loved it, so we did great here. The ward basically tripled in size, and it wasn’t baptisms, it was just us bringing people back. It was actually really fun at the time. We didn’t baptize anyone, but after I left a Jehovah’s Witness got baptized, so I’m counting that as a HUGE win for us. I can shit talk Mormons all day, but the JWs are somehow worse.

-Weird stories from here: We were teaching an old lady, and she was being annoying and obstinate, arguing with us that her family didn’t need to go to church and that she didn’t want to confuse them. So we decided to leave. Nowadays, I’d have completely agreed with her, but at the time I thought I was a divine messenger sent on behalf of God. So. Anyways, as I went to leave, I felt some thing take control of my legs. Like. They stopped working. Idk how to explain it. The rest of me worked. I just couldn’t move my legs. My companion was already standing, I was trying to stand, and finally I just looked at the lady, opened my mouth to say something, and then kinda just went off, but like…they weren’t really MY words coming out of my mouth? Like, I was barely able to move my mouth fast enough for the words to happen, I wasn’t thinking about what I was saying, but when I finished, she said “Wow, Elder, I’ve never thought about it like that. I will absolutely bring my grandson to church on Sunday.” And my companion was just gawking, so apparently whatever I said was pretty good 🤷 

Months 21-24: Area – Nicolas Romero  |  Congregation name: La Colmena

-Companions: Elder Toledo: Kinda immature and lazy, but nice enough.

-Elder Tec: Kinda geeky and weird, very nice, also very jumpy.

-In this area: The ward was good, the people were nice enough, and there was a cool abandoned ranch house that was used as a dog sanctuary  that I loved. There was El Viejito Emilio that guarded the place, and there was a cute middle-aged couple that ran it, and they liked us, so we’d do “service” for them 1-2x a week, which largely consisted of picking up poop and stuff, and then just petting all the cute dogs for so long. Plus, the ranch house itself was HIGH KEY aesthetic. Like a fallout thing, it had graffiti all over, and cool little nicknacks lying around, and we could use it to hide from the rain, and I loved that little ranch house SO much.

- Weird stories: Another blessing. I was giving a VERY newlywed couple a blessing. The husband said he was possessed, but really he just sleeptalked. Whatever, I can bless that I guess? 🤷 So I put my hands on his head and am really just preparing to make something up, when what actually happens in suddenly I knew these people fucked before they tied the knot. An unwelcome surprise, since they were both deeply weird people and I didn’t want to know about their sex lives. So that just kinda popped out of my mouth, and immediately the guy goes RIGID and falls out of his chair. His wife is panicking, she thinks he died, so I go into emergency mode, we prop up his feet, Elder Tec checks for a pulse, he’s still breathing, all good,  and then the mission doctor won’t answer he phone. She was bad about that usually, but it was pretty late, so I wasn’t surprised. So instead, I just called home. Like. Dr Dad to the rescue, right? It was late, my parents were VERY confused, and so I described what what happened, and my dad walked me through some stuff and we kinda just decided he was having a full-blown panic attack because I had announced to the room that he and his wife did it before their wedding, which, again, matters very little to me. It didn’t even matter to me at the time, like…people have sex. It’s what they do. But for some reason some part of the universe was like “You get to know this now, bitch” and I was like “ew, OK, thanks for that”. Anyways, we got home super lte because it took us a while to calm him down, and that was the last time I ever had anything weird like that happen to me again.

- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_T_NYZesRdY (this is from the Book of Mormon musical, and it’s FUCKING hilarious)

- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5KSBEChzpMM (my experience in a nutshell)

[forsaken-headcanons]

skins... SKINS.... SKINS!!11!!1!1!! (long yap incoming... esp Shedletsky skins...) (also these r all based on my gameplay so. if any of these skins act this way to u in Forsaken, thats prob me!!!11!11!1)

Agent Skins (Most of these hcs are based off of my gameplay... yippee...):

They're basically an AU of the four (Guest 1337, Chance, 007n7, and Builderman) if they were agents. Duh. But their goal in Forsaken is to protect their "Escorts" in any way they can and make them last until the end of the round. Boss Two Time is their... well, boss, and sends them out in these missions and assigns them their Escorts.

Escorts are often as follows (again, based on my gameplay...): Any Milestone Elliot Skin, Telamon, Guardian Angel Shedletsky, Vampire Shedletsky, Rockstar Shedletsky, Milestone III-IV Shedletsky, Red Carpet Guest (don't ask how), VIP Noob, Boss Two Time, Alien Skins, Golden Skins, ULTRAKILL Skins, LOVESHOT! Dusekkar, Inaba Taph, etc.

Red and Blue? Haha, they're different teams. They're constantly competing on getting the Escort to safety. The Blue Agents (mainly Chance) say they're better since they can protect the Escort head on, while the Red Agents say they're better since they're strategic and can protect the Escort and THEMSELVES.

Agent!007n7 and Escort!Elliot are on... rough terms, to say the least, but n7 always tries his best to protect the other and make it up to him.

Chance keeps flirting with the Escorts, but Guest always smacks him in the back of the head and tell him to pay attention to his job.

007n7 uses his clones + inject to body block for the Escorts, while he himself gets them to safety. Some of the Escorts freak out in seeing "n7" run head first to the killer just to protect them, but soon realize it's just a clone and he's A-OKAY!!!

The Agents were sent there for "SnR" (Search and Rescue) missions, but it eventually turns into "Search and Retrive" missions if their Escort dies. Yeah.

Based off one of my gameplays but uhh. The map was Glasshouses (so there weren't any items that spawned), and Elliot was in LOWWWW LOW health, I'm telling you this man was hanging on by a THREAD. And 007n7 was on duty and trying his best to make sure he wasn't going to bleed out. When he noticed Jason was running towards them, he tried his best to body block but uh. Jason pushed him aside and executed Elliot. Basically. n7 had to watch his own Escort die in front of him, knowing he couldn't do anything, and just ran away crying. (i was that n7 i fear... i felt so guilty UAGHUAHGUAHGUHG)

Another thing based on my gameplay: Red Carpet!Guest (who i'll be referring to as RC!Guest from now on) as the Escort was a REALLY really great sentinel, but he kept getting "punished" since he often missed his hits. 007n7 stuck near him and hid behind walls and made sure he was doing alright. They lost each other at some point, but n7 found a medkit but he was on full health so he was like "Oh, lemme just see who needs healing!" and looked over to the Character UI (the one that makes you see everyone's status) and saw RC!Guest was DANGROUSLY close to dying, so he RAN across the map trying to find him. Eventually he found him and gave him the medkit and they became gay and fell in love and kissed/j (that didnt actually happen, RC!Guest just said "ty" and n7 (me) said "np" BUT THATS BASICALLY WHAT HAPPENED-)

Telamon:

Often ends up being the LMS. He also tries body blocking for others, and doesn't get why they panic whenever he gets injured (he's practically a deity to them so... yeah)

He often sticks near the other Admins and makes sure they're doing alright, yanking any medkits and bloxys for the others.

Gets MAD PISSED whenever someone with low health STILL tries to loop the killer instead of running away and letting him take care of the killer.

Lwk fine.... Idk I feel like Chance would try to flirt with him even tho he's practically a deity. He doesn't mind at all and lets them do their thing.

Guardian Angel Shedletsky:

Similar to the Agent skins, he was also sent down in order to protect his "assignments", making sure they don't get injured nor killed.

Some survivors get freaked out with the wheels on his head, but he always hits them with the "Do not be afraid" quote lmfao.

He glows. Idc what anyone says HE GLOWS HE GLOWS HE GLO-

Says things like "May the divinity be with you, my child." "The Lord will forgive me for this." like IDK MAN IT FITS WITH HIS CHARACTER

Man I wish he had voicelines.... that would be epic as hell...

Two Time is FLABBERGASTED like. They think he was sent from the Spawn to protect them and they're like "I WAS RIGHT!!! I WAS RIGHT!!! SEE I TOLD U THE SPAWN EXISTS I WAS RIGHT!!!" or smth like that idk :3. They're like really giddy and ask a ton of questions abt how "heaven" or wtv the Spawn's version of heaven is like. GA!Shedletsky doesn't know nor does he have the heart to tell them that he isn't from the Spawn, so he kinda js plays along with it.

Minis:

Disco!007n7 and Bouncer!Guest 1337 are GAY and have FLIRTED before TRUST ME I WAS THERE-

Vampire Shedletsky mention. no i dont have hcs for him i just love him. well.... he eats the survivor's dead bodies ig... which makes 1x MAD PISSED bcs it weakens the corpses he has + it makes rejuvinate less effective.

Rockstar Shedletsky and Milestone Elliot are band partners.... heh..... god i LOVE THEM THEYRE SO

Actually. Skeletal Builderman is just. the more insane and mad scientist-esque Builderman. Yes, he has done experiments on Vampire Shedletsky. Yes, they're gay.

The Alien Skins were sent to Earth for research and also bcs they wanted to have fun lwk <333 Alien!Elliot's pizzas are erm.... unappetizing, to say the least, but the survivors couldn't care less bcs THEY NEED THAT HEAL.

anwyay that's all... i love skins..... i love wasting my money on skins instead of the actual characters.... hehehehahewjahjdsjawbjdbs.....

-⛑️🍗 anon

Are the agent skins like tf2 or something. Cause if so that's absolute peak.

[lonewolflupe]

I finished playing Republic Commando for the first time and have some thoughts to share (: Beware, there be spoilers!

Alright so first of all, I'm a fan, and I think I'm gonna be obsessed with the boys from Delta Squad. Mind you, I haven't read the RepComm books yet, but I have the fullest intention to do so (they're patiently waiting to be taken off their shelves).

To start with, I've really enjoyed picking up gaming again. I've been gaming (mostly Playstation) since I was about 10 years old, and it's always been one of my favourite hobbies, so I'd totally call myself a gamer. Due to adulting, I hadn't gamed for over a year. So picking up my controller to finally game again was such a good feeling <3

So I've seen a lot of art featuring Delta Squad here on Tumblr, so that obviously piqued my interest. Reason number one to finally play this game is definitely @deltasquadweek , because I needed some sort of reference to participate, and what better option than the source material?

Look at me rambling; I haven't even properly talked about the actual game yet. To be fair, I'm really bad with giving a substantiated opinion review-wise, and I'm really bad with analysing stuff. So this won't be a review or analysis, it will just be another Lupe ramble, I guess.

The Game™️

So the game was awesome! I know it just hit its 20 year anniversary, and it obviously has 2005 graphics, but that's alright and I can definitely look through it because I know it's from that year and it actually feels nostalgic (I used to play a lot of Star Wars Battlefront II during my childhood, which also released in 2005). The story was pretty cool, although it had some bigger time gaps with missions jumping through the Clone Wars. I wouldn't have minded more missions, but that's mainly because I would have liked to see more of the boys. (Also detail: I played on Medium difficulty, which was the default setting)

Geonosis was awesome, despite the Geonosians being swift and slimy buggers which were hard to kill in melee, because of them being so.. Swift and slimy. I love that this first mission was right at the start of the war, and now we know how much Delta Squad contributed to the war effort. The last level (the timed one; was this the infamous Belly of the Beast?) was pretty hard and it took me a few times to beat it, but I was super happy to get all four boys out of Geonosis alive.

The ghost ship/RAS Prosecutor mission was pretty scary at some points haha, gave me some Alien (1979) vibes, especially with the face hugging scavenger droids. I have mentioned before on my blog that I'm a wimp when it comes to the horror genre, but I made it out unharmed - again, like the boys. (Although those Trandoshans scared the kark out of me a few times; it had some good jump scares!)

Unfortunately the Trandoshans returned in the Kashyyyk mission, as was expected - but so did the Geonosians, which was a pretty unpleasant surprise. Especially because they kicked our shebs with their elite warriors when they appeared out of kriffing nowhere. How rude. I definitely struggled the most with the Kachirho Bridge mission, because those insufferable SBDs kept killing us. I found it ironically hilarious that the level was called 'A Bridge Too Far', my inner history nerd really appreciated that fact.

I wish I could say I got all boys out of Kashyyyk too, but everyone who played the game knows that doesn't happen. I knew Sev wouldn't make it out with his squad before starting the game, because I guess it's hard to stay away from spoilers for 20 years. It just.. The fact that I knew it would happen, didn't make it easier? Because now I've seen the boys, their personalities and their dynamics, so now it makes it harder. Boss' determination to get Sev out, Fixer's practical answer based on regulation, Scorch's devastation.. Kriff Yoda.

BUT one thing I learned from watching Game of Thrones is that if you don't see someone dying on screen, they don't have to be truly dead (and sometimes when they die on screen, they come back anyway). Right? Right?!?

(Kriff, I wish they'd made that sequel game)

Alright alright, happy thoughts, happy thoughts.. 🧘🏻‍♀️ Yes, Delta Squad! I'd just like to say: I love all of them, obviously. But Scorch is probably my favourite? Although Sev is just <333 And Boss, but.. I can't leave Fixer out now, can I??

I love how they all have their own strengths and skills, and I loved how the game made use if it through the commands feature. It worked pretty well (although I only figured out how to use it on PS4 after Geonosis) and it was a really fun way to move around with computer-controlled characters.

The Blorbos™️

Scorch is just so much fun, I had to laugh at almost every comment he made. I loved his enthusiasm and his dynamics with the others, especially with Sev <3 And Sev is just amazing, I fell for him the moment I heard him talk for the first time. I also love the bloody paint decoration on his armour and his hunter/predator vibe, especially with the sniping. Oh my <3 I loved how Fixer was totally different, maybe a bit more of a follower of the rules, but definitely not less badass because of it. And Boss.. Well I did fall for Sev's voice, but if you let Temuera Morrison voice a clone, you have my vote. And he was Boss alright, since the others had such respect for him and followed all his orders without a doubt.

I'm actually really looking forward to diving into some Delta Squad headcanons, and of course more art and hopefully some fics too! And I can't wait to start creating some Delta Squad content myself!

Alright, have a Commando Cookie if you made it this far 🍪 Count me in as a Republic Commando fan, I'm definitely gonna obsess about it more and more and it's gonna be my hyperfixation (RepComm) within a hyperfixation (TCW) within a hyperfixation (Star Wars). So I guess you'll be seeing me around simping over anything RepComm/Delta Squad (and hopefully the books next) 🫡

[calebdatabase]

Caleb & MC Bound by DNA

My god first off I was crashing out while watching the trailer I'm so excited for more CALEB LORE! I remember asking for more Sci-Fi content on a survey and they delivered! Soooo many incredible feelings, so I wanted to follow up on my Caleb as Donor 002 post.

Now we know that Caleb and MC were created from the same 'source' as he literally stated in the trailer. Seems it wasn't far-fetched to draw a connection between Eve being created from Adam's rib!

Taking a closer look at the structure of the DNA helix, I interpret 'source' as they are Cyborgs birthed from the same 'energy source'. The helix appears mechanical in nature with rippling energy currents.

It appears, in this new timeline, Caleb and MC are bound by their very DNA; his myth trailer included imagery of a metal double helix and the following text:

"The enigma behind the double metal helix... The promise you had since you were born."

"But the promise we've had since we were born, I kept that one." - Caleb to MC

Again, there is this imagery of being bound at birth, similar to how twins are (I mentioned the symbolism of twins/siblings and how they're often experimentation victims of Ever in the Donor 002 post). In this case, perhaps they are cyborg clones of the same energy core.

And if you're a Potterhead, you'll see that its a concept remniscent of Harry's and Voldemort's twin Phoenix Feather wand cores. One cannot survive without the other, both must die for one to be vanquished.

Twins, clones, whatever you want to call it**—** it's a pattern you can't deny, and now I'm convinced in the present timeline, Caleb and her are linked in more ways than they appear to be.

Also love how Caleb x MC haters got their panties in a twist and Infold was literally like 'LET ME SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU' *drops myth trailer* Kudos to them for sticking with the planned lore and remaining unfazed by the initial controversy. They had to prime everyone before dropping this, and the ones who get it, get it.

"Then it's a promise. In life and in death, we will never be apart."

You can't tell me these aren't their literal wedding vows HAHA I'm sickkk. Caleb basically said: 'Till death do us part? I think not..' The look in his eyes is so intense too like damn ok i'm all yours for eternity my dude.

I think the promise they made when they were born refers to his promise to protect her always. It's a call back to their childhood memories about Caleb protecting her like a ring system protects its planet; they are born together and they die together.

Here's my thoughts on their A-01 and X-02 titles:

Caleb was distinctively labeled Donor 002 while MC was labeled Subject 001 in old experiment documents by Gaia and Ever.

In Caleb's very first intro trailer and his new myth trailer, his title is X-02. Respectively, MC is A-01. They are a pair represented by the concepts of Death and Rebirth, the ideal weapons to destroy one another, as we're all aware.

'A' may represent 'Alpha' in the concept of 'Alpha and Omega' aka the 'Beginning and the End'. MC can miraculously revive after dying via her Aether Core and can only be fully destroyed (and by proxy reborn) by the power Caleb wields.

'X' is associated with 'with death and rebirth, as it is thought to mark the end of one cycle and the beginning of another. It is also often seen as a symbol of change or transition, as it represents the crossing of a threshold.'

Pretty straightforward. All I experience is pain with these two, and I. Need. More.

In honor of Caleb's myth dropping, I'm gonna post my embarrassingly long Supernova theory on the pair soon since I gleaned more insight from the myth trailer tidbits. Now I'm not sure if I should wait until reading his myth so I can go back and edit or just release it as is.

Might have to split it up into a few posts with their own section so its digestible lmao. It's been a couple months in the making and while it includes the scientific concepts explained in the Bound by Gravity, United in Resonance video, I also weaved it into the lore and the direction of Caleb's story. I've been a full believer in the Supernova Catalyst theory since Caleb was released and I'm excited to share my thoughts on them so stay tuned (his eyes are literal supernovas)!

My tumblr is Caleb Database and I plan to post more fun things like fics, lore theories, and fanart (I've already got one fic and two lore posts up). I'm also obsessed with Star Wars and Harry Potter, so you're likely to see some AU's of Caleb in these realms...

[azullumi]

“i think i like this little life” ; genshin men

summary — small things and simple moments with him that makes life worth living.

includes — various characters (w/gender-neutral reader)

tags — fluff, established relationship, kind of domestic, not proof-read, kind of word vomit ; scenarios

words — 1336

notes — i was originally going to add like a watching him get ready scenario thingy but then i changed my mind,, anws i feel like i wrote everyone too soft here haha

;; spending the morning together

honey-dyed light slips through the thin drapery over the window as the distant shrunken circle of golden rises to the sky portraying the morning that comes. the birds sing a gentle tune outside, serving as some sort of alarm that wakes him up, eyes fluttering open to the sight of the familiar ceiling, the feeling of warmth beside him.

although the dawn’s early night was never a pleasant welcome to him as it only indicates the things that he has to do and have to do for the remainder of the day, anticipation comes at the mere thought that he’ll get to start and spend it with you—everything becomes a little bit better like a weight on his shoulder has been lifted.

in the stillness and silence of the morning, there you are besides him; his gaze lingers at your sleeping form—tranquility seen on the edges and corners of your being—, eyes deep and swirling with feelings of affection; he doesn’t even know how soft his expression becomes whenever he looks at you until someone would inform him of it. strands of your hair were tangled and messy, some of it obstructing your face as it fell over your forehead, and the feeble light shines itself on your skin, basking you in a warm golden glow. everything feels like scenery, something out of a claude monet painting. how did he ever become so lucky to have someone as lovely and wonderful as you in his life?

the moment doesn’t last forever, however. as if a fleeting one, a groan was heard from you and you stir yourself awake.

“good morning, lovely. did you sleep well?” his voice, tender and filled with affection, pierces through the gentle silence of the room. he presses a small kiss on your forehead as he greets you, brushing the strands of your hair back as he did. you slowly blink your eyes open, the sight of him greeting you and immediately, a small smile graces your lips. “good morning.” you reply and having just woken up, your words came out as a whisper only for him to hear.

“do you want to get out of bed?” you only shook your head as an answer, snuggling closer to him. face buried on the curve of his neck, you inhale his scent—faintly cloying yet pleasant. he laughs shortly, “we can stay in for a little bit more then.”

for him, the thought of waking up with you to the soft glow of morning outweighs every trace of his not-so-morning-person personality; he’s not a morning person but if he gets to spend every morning under this light with you, he wouldn’t mind it.

ayato, diluc, dainsleif, heizhou, kaeya, baizhu, kaveh

;; watching everything outside the window

it was just a small thing that you would do together, mostly when one of you is bored. sitting by the window, looking out of it, watching every person that passes by, and creating some sort of story behind them—a not-so-true reason behind the passing strangers’ actions. it’s really just a simple way to pass time and to entertain yourself and you love it, especially when you’re doing it with him.

“do you see that man over there?” you start, referring to the man on the street who seems like in a rush, and his gaze follows the mentioned person. “he’s walking—no, wait, he’s running because he’s on the way to meet someone.”

instead of a mere indulgence in gossip or prying into the affairs of others, it transforms into a serene narrative, delicately unwinding the threads of each moment that passes—people watching, the art of noticing. everything felt like a movie with each of the scenes unfolding before you.

he takes a sip from the cup that he was holding, eyes showing a hint of interest. “perhaps he’s on the way to meet the love of his life.” he chimes, his gaze then darting over at the sight of a woman with their dog. “how about them?”

you hum, “maybe on the way to the vet?”

“sounds like a plausible reason.”

the moment stills, the both of you quietly observing and noticing everything outside—like how the plant displayed outside the window of the shop was a different one compared to yesterday or how the cat across the street always sits and waits on that one spot until an old lady comes to feed them. in essence, yesterday was different to today; in a way that yesterday, there were less people than today or that yesterday, the sun whispered its golden tales to you as to today, it wears a different hue as clouds gather in quiet conversations.

“oh, look there, the cat has a companion.” you say, breaking the hushed moment being shared between you two, tone with a faint of excitement in it as your eyes flickered with the same note. “do you think they’re a couple?”

“they look alike, perhaps siblings.”

“that’s silly, you know a lot of cats look alike.”

and yet, despite all the small shifts and subtle differences painted on his moment before and currently, his yesterday was no different than his today, perhaps it was because you were there with him. many people experience today in a different way and for him, he experienced today with you—and he could only silently hope that it remains that way forever.

kaveh, alhaitham, baizhu, wanderer, lyney, heizhou, childe

;; making plans to spend more time together

there’s just something so intimate in doing things together even if it’s just as mundane as making plans together, to see if one has time for the other on a certain day so that you can have a small date with him or to see if he could accompany you out shopping. perhaps, it is one way of saying that the time you have right now is not enough, never enough, and you can’t wait to see spend time with each other again even if the two of you are right there besides each other currently—a shared anticipation that whispers of the inadequacy of the present moment, always leaving you yearning for more time in each other's company.

“do you want to go out tomorrow morning?” he asks you, his voice gentle like the soft beating of his heart against your ear. you lay besides him while your head is resting on top of his chest and he has his arm encircled around your figure which urges you to nestle into the curve of it; your forms were intertwined with one another in bed, his fingers going from tracing the delicate of your back to playing the strands of your hair, twirling and combing through it.

“to where are we going?” you answer, head tilting up to look at him and his eyes meet yours in that moment, a soft gaze full of adoration for you and only you. he hums, as if going into thought, “there’s a newly opened cafe down the street, do you want to have breakfast there or do you want to have it here instead? we can cook something together. which one sounds more appealing to you?”

he gives you a set of choices, giving you the freedom for your own comfort and desire—something that you greatly appreciate. you’ve contemplated on your decision, taking just a few seconds to do so: “the former.”

“in a cafe?”

“yeah, i feel like going out tomorrow. can we wake up early so that we could, like, take a walk and go to the park?” he doesn’t give it a second thought, nodding and agreeing to what you have asked: “i don’t mind. maybe we can have a picnic there?”

“next time we can.” you answer in which he responded with a hum. silence then settles in the air between you two yet it doesn’t last long as he spoke once more: “can you move closer? it feels like you’re not that close enough for me.” he says, earning a chuckle from you.

albedo, thoma, tighnari, zhongli, dainsleif, lyney, cyno

© azullumi — do not plagiarize, copy, repost, nor translate any of my works.

[psilliguykai]

Aaand he’s here!! THE William of William’s Wanton Weary Wiles himself :0

This is his normal at-work/day-to day outfit, but he’s usually uh. cunty-er. when he goes out n stuff. I’ll probably draw him dressed up and/or being more gnc at some point soon ^^

[props to you if you get the references in his middle and last name :]]

Some extra little facts/notes about him!

- Mood Swings and very mixed self esteem. He’s simultaneously the worst most lazy rotten thing to ever deface this earth and also he’s extremely talented and cool and strong and the best and anyone who doesn’t like him is simply Wrong and should fuck off [<- all in his eyes. whatever he “actually” is is up to you :]]]

- Not particularly self aware or emotionally intelligent [the majority of the time anyways] but he is ultimately. Underneath all the uh. everything else that he is. A caring guy and he Will [haha] be there for the people he cares about when they need him.

- He doesn’t like to burden other people with his problems and will usually just kinda either A: disappear when things are getting messy for him personally. Or B: try to convince both himself and others that “things are great!!” [<- lies] and distract himself with parties, going out to drink, etc.

- Very creative !! As mentioned in the facts featured in the actual sheet he does music, but he also dabbles in sewing [added the stars to his pants himself], fabric dying/bleaching, drawing, painting, and sculpture. He’s a better at 3d art than 2d ^^

- He used to do art more, especially when he was in school. He games more in his free time now, but will still occasionally pull out the Art Stuff [especially when he wants to make things for Love Interest :]]

- His sleep schedule is fucked

- His favorite food is American cheese

- He’s a solid 6’2 with an intimidating and fairly confident stature. He’s generally fairly high-energy and outgoing.

- William and Laplace are around the same height [both being the tallest of the WWWW’s HMSW], but Will appears generally larger and is much stronger [not that it really matters seeing as they would never be able to interact or meet - just for reference ^^]

That’s all for now! enjoy The Guy I guess and as always, asks for the characters in/generally about this AU are super open :3

[noemilivv]

Pooksters can you do husk, alastor, and Lucifer with an s/o who is crying because they got shampoo in their eyes (haha) and gets all protective of their s/o but gets kinda embarrassed to find out it was just shampoo.

💋💋💋

OMG?! DISCORD GROUP CHAT REFERENCE?!

i remember when you messaged me this i literally laughed so hard LMAO

yeah bro here ya go

Husker

He heard you scream from the bathroom out of pain when the shampoo got stuck in your eye, he playfully rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing while waiting for you to get out of the shower

When you told him what happened, let’s be real, he probably laughed his ass off LMAO

Don’t worry though, he’s not a total ass, he helped you clean your eyes XD

Lucifer

Panic. Literal panic. Heard you yell out of pain, comes rushing in, swings up the curtain, literally interrupting your shower.

He babies you, a lot. He thinks your dying. And he gives you an emotional support duck, his name is Dave.

Will help you as best he can to get the stuff out of your eyes, but lowkey probably makes it worse LMAO

Alastor

Hears you scream and thinks someone hurt you, bro is ready to kick ass, he teleports into the bathroom, but he doesn’t barge into the shower like Lucifer, and calmly asks if you’re okay.

Once you explain that it was just shampoo, he waits for you to do your thing, and then once you get out he will help you get any of the remainders out.

[ro-bee]

Reference of that dog :)

I'm gonna start calling him Kirander I think (thank you again joffy, muah~)

I want to make his outfit more detailed but yeah... My finger is hurting a lot right now so no ... I'm not gonna do that, imagine it yourself

Stuff about wolf below ↓

He's still the god of death, for him death is beautiful is peace and tranquility, liberation from pain, he really doesn't like when people suffer.

Unfortunately his siblings really enjoy when people suffer (it gives them power I think) so yeah I'm not gonna go in details because I'm still thinking about this but yes, they fight.

Everything start because Kiran's plan is basically the end of the world and gods, kill all servants kill all gods and start over let the world heal and let the souls rest. (He's going for that geno run)

His siblings aren't really happy about it so after a tremendous fight they imprison him (yes they still get injured) and then we'll have all the profecy thing and all that good stuff yada yada

Then goat happen, Kiran is really sorry for goat and he doesn't really want to bring them back to life (it would means making them suffer again and again) but he doesn't have any other options and so they make a deal :)

"Bring all the bishops to me. Don't make it too painful if you can, just bring them to death and then we'll end this era of suffering together"

I think this is what Kirander would say to goat... Of course he wouldn't reveal his complete plan to goat, he knows that mortals won't understand "the great scheme of things" they can't see the bigger picture like him, he knew that if goat found out that this rebirth was going to end relatively soon in them dying again because of a God's will they wouldn't had accepted, so he omitted to them the "murder suicide" part of the deal.

but also he didn't even suspected to be betrayed by his vessel so I guess... deserved?

I think that with time and after listening to the bishops goat would find out Kiran's actual plan and also why he ended up chained in purgatory, they realized that the persecution of their kind was all done because of Kiran basically, for his stupid ideals. That would make them become more and more resentful.

Also yeah they're absolutely brutal when killing the bishops, is for revenge.

Kiran doesn't appreciate it but also does nothing to persuade them from doing horrible stuff to his siblings... Is not like he can physically stop them, he's still stuck haha.

About Aym and Baal: their names is Deb and Cal, (they're Samoyed btw) idk how they ended up with Kiran but is probably some kind of bishops shenanigans, absolutely it wasn't an act of love

As for the fight... Eeeh... I don't think goat would have to fight the two pups like... It was a murder suicide since the begging someone already took care of them now that he was free (it was painless for sure... They would be together again soon)

And then the goat betrayal

Kiran dies miserably and then he find himself back again... As a "mortal" this time because for some reason goat can't let him go so "easy" or maybe is a way for goat to actually make him pay with pain for his actions

Like "welcome to hell now doggy"

Aahhhh....

Yuppie toxic yauri

[discjude]

Oh boy oh boy its the discjude official COVEN bingo card!!! not many are about the coven themselves because i uh uh don't know too much about them but yeah. I've put a brief explanation of each of these under the cut (because a few are vague) (WARNING its a lot):

Lady Lesso mentioned: this one sort of coincides with "hester true evil speech". I reckon she's important enough to the witches to warrant a mention. Also. I think all of the Lessos might be relevant but I talk about that in my predictions

Obligatory Sophie cameo: she's Soman's favourite. She's showing up

Political commentary: based off of his substack, I don't think Soman will go too overt with it, but I think there'll be a more roundabout one. I'd love to see him address the fact that he wrote in that homophobia is a thing in SGE. Soman if you can hear me

Drag race reference: He's done this a lot before, in QFG mostly, and I think he'll do it again

TCY acknowledged: this could be like a "haha yeah you remember how the storian almost got destroyed? that was kinda crazy aha". I have a horrible feeling that he's going to completely skip over that part of canon

Hester gives a speech about "true evil": i mean come ooonnnnnnn. I also think this'll include something about evil love that contradicts the canon about it

No blatant fatphobia regarding dot: Soman phased this out in TCY I think he'll have stuck with it

Rats are, somehow, back. Not explained: Japeth killed at least one of those things and I genuinely think Soman will have forgotten it

Events of R+F acknowledged: ties into my predictions a bit, but I reckon the setup regarding neverland and the other stuff in Fall might come up

I'm right about my predictions: I think the entire thing looks very aquatic themed, and there's a lot regarding evil water stuff, so a) the mermaids are relevant b) the saders are (still) relevant c) the lessos are relevant. that's the big three in my opinion. I can't wait to be horrifically wrong

Storian still at fault: i mean. name one book where it isn't. and you cant say OTK that doesnt COUNT

Symbolic ending of the series thing: I want the storian dead. thats what this one means

Obligatory tagatha: come onnnnnnnnn

There is at least one twink: yeah. not much to say here

Vaguely pub-style setting: this one also includes "why is everything british" because i said so

None Japeth: Japeth is mentioned by name exactly no times. I'd love to have faith but I really don't

Tennis reference: I fucking CAUGHT Botic being a tennis player's surname in the prequels. he's GOING to try it again

Colour/lighting symbolism: have a draft rn about colour symbolism in SGE and I think Soman might lean into it

At least one snake: please i want to feel something

hestadil real: come ON he's doing this every tiktok post about coven has had the hestadil tag he's doing this

Aric is referenced: goes with my predictions and lady lesso being mentioned. I hate to say it I think he's far more likely to be referenced than Japeth

Big unanswered question gets answered: the BIG!! one is the Aric Dad Reveal. I want to know for parallel reasons and I think it could happen. maybe

no wait! We'll use the power of friendship: speaks for itself. something like this happens

major character death: goodbye dot. im being fr I think she's dying in coven

Thank you dearly to @liketwoswansinbalance for some of these entries I really struggled to think of some. Also no I'm not convinced of my predictions. But it'd be nice. right

[cwritesforfun]

Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Fem!Reader: Maverick's Viper

Rewatched this movie lol sooooo... Your call sign is "Viper," and you were given it very quickly into your career. Your father is Maverick and everyone thought your flight style was similar to his, hence the dangerous name.

Y/N = Your Name & Your Father = Maverick

** I do not own the Top Gun Maverick characters or plot

Masterlist

Y/N's POV

You arrive at the Hard Deck and see your father getting off of his motorcycle. He walks over and says, "Be careful tonight, and don't mention that I'm in charge. I don't want them to worry." You reply, "You got it, old man. I don't even know you." He smiles, laughs, and says, "See you in there."

You see your phone ringing with your annoying Aunt's number and you answer it. She begins to ramble and you feel like this call will never end. You wave to Phoenix when she walks past you to go inside and you see other familiar faces.

You see Bradley Bradshaw pull up and you notice he's not in uniform. Always the rebel. You laugh and your Aunt asks you what is funny about dying family members... oops, you take that as your cue to end the conversation.

Bradley stops in front of you, smiles, and exclaims, "This must be a special mission if you're here." You reply, "Only the best of the best are inside, so of course, I'm in here. The real question is why are you here?" He laughs, pulls you into a hug, and says, "Don't ghost me again. It sucks." You laugh and head inside. You grab your drinks and you notice your father leaning away, so Bradley doesn't see him.

You leave with Bradley over to your friends and you hug Phoenix then a few others. You sit with Bob and drink your beer, trying to be chill.

Hangman smirks and asks, "Viper, fancy a game of darts?" You answer, "Only if you're ready to lose." You hear gasps and he asks, "Wanna bet?" You answer, "I'll buy you and only you one beer if you win. I'll have one beer if I win too." He replies, "Lame, but I'm okay with it."

You play the first round and lose. He bets you he will win 2 of 3, so you play another round while he sips on the beer you got him. You win the 2nd round and you win, so you get a beer.

During your last round, Bradley walks up and says, "Come on, Y/N, we have better things to do." Hangman says, "Dude, we're playing a game here." Bradley pulls your arm and you shoot your last dart landing directly in the center causing your friends to cheer.

Bradley pulls you over to the piano and he pats the space next to him before he starts playing. You play on the left side of the piano and he plays on the right then you start singing.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Hangman and his crew toss your dad outside yelling, "Overboard!" You wonder if they know who he is or why he is here. You also wonder if people know you're related.

You sing, have fun, and enjoy the night with your friends.

You make it back to your home where your dad is sitting in the living room watching TV. You grab your water before sitting next to him to ask, "Do the guys who threw you out know who you were?" Your dad answers, "I do not think so, Y/N... How was the rest of your night?" You sip your water and answer, "Great, it's good to see everyone again... I noticed you avoided Bradley. You can't avoid him forever." He replies, "I didn't want to ruin his night of fun tonight... He looked happy and good. I didn't want to bring up the past." You reply, "You'll have to if they expect you to lead him." He replies, "Ok Miss Full Of Good Ideas." You laugh and watch TV with him.

You drive to base the next morning on your motorcycle, which is an almost identical build to your father's. He claims that yours is safer though... and he has to keep his kid safe. HAHA!

You're sitting talking to Phoenix and Rear Admiral Bates talks about who will teach you. Your father walks up and you watch as he wins over everyone, except for Bradley. You realize that you have to refer to him as Rooster for work. He can be like a rooster sometimes haha.

It's time for the first round... Payback, Fanboy, and Rooster are first up. Rooster is "shot" down and he has to do push-ups. Phoenix, Hangman, and Bob are up next. They lose and you laugh as Bob calls Hangman, "Bagman."

Rooster catches your arm as you head to your plane and he says, "Hey uh Viper, get your dad, will you? Someone needs to." You laugh and say, "I'll try."

You fly and think you've outsmarted your father when he does an advanced maneuver causing you to laugh. He "shoots" you and says, "You need to go for it, Viper. No waiting."

You're doing your push-ups and Coleman asks, "Do you think anyone's gonna get him, Viper?" You answer, "I hope so. He's gotten too cocky in his old age." The others laugh and Bob says, "I don't think you're supposed to say that about your superior." You reply, "You can if he's your dad." You feel eyes on you and Hangman asks, "So you're Maverick's Viper? The one they told us about?" You answer, "I am his daughter if that's what you're asking."

In the next round ~ Hangman and Rooster go out together. You have a very bad feeling about this. Not only does Rooster hate your father currently, but he also has an intense rivalry with Hangman. Rooster and your father get heated in the air exchanging hateful words ... Rooster and Hangman get taken out. No one wins that round...

That night, you shower at your place and decide to go out for a bit.

You leave on your motorcycle, buy ice cream, and sit on a bench near the beach to eat it.

You hear, "Y/N? Mind if I sit?" You see Bradley standing there and you say, "I don't mind at all." You hand him a spoon and ask, "Want any ice cream?" He takes a bite and says, "God this feels like the old days." You laugh and reply, "Yeah it really does, except this time we both drove here and you didn't have to bang on my window for me to sneak out." He laughs and says, "I actually drove my house before this and was going to hit your window... I saw your light off and I ended up seeing your dad walking inside with Penny... I drove off before he could see me though." You reply, "You know one day you two will have to stop avoiding each other... I told him the same thing." He scoffs and asks, "And what did he say about that?" You answer, "He didn't want to make you unhappy by talking to him." He replies, "I still am unhappy just seeing him." You reply, "Chill, he is my dad after all." He replies, "Sometimes I wish he wasn't." You ask, "Why?" He shrugs and answers, "Oh just reasons." You laugh and say, "Ok... so uh how have you been recently?" He shrugs and answers, "Fine I guess. What about you?" You answer, "Oh just living in my father's shadow everywhere I go... I told everyone this afternoon and everyone was so shocked. I guess people know of Maverick and Viper... I hate it." He replies, "Yeah well at least you're not in your dead dad's shadow." You pat his shoulder and say, "You know, you really should talk to someone." He replies, "I am, right now. You're the only person I want to tell." You nod and lean your head against his shoulder.

You both sit on the beach a bit longer before parting ways.

When you walk through the door at home, your father is standing with Penny in the living room. You wave and your dad asks, "Were you with Bradley? He drove by here like he was going to get you to sneak out, except you were already out." You laugh and answer, "Yeah we were back at our spot. It was nice... I told him to talk to you." He asks, "What did he say?" You answer, "You know for two people mad at each other, you both ask about each other a lot." Penny half-smiles and you say, "Penny, talk some sense into him. I'm going to bed, but it was great seeing you." She smiles at you and you go to your room.

Days pass and your dad's winning streak continues.

One day, you are all told to go to the beach near the Hard Deck. Phoenix leans over to you and asks, "How long before one of the guys hits on us because our shirts are off?" You answer, "I give it less than one minute." She replies, "I'm going to have to agree with you."

Sure enough, some dudes walk up and their eyes keep wandering your chests... Phoenix says, "You boys are sick." She pulls you over to where Rooster, Bob, and some others are. You exclaim, "None of you hit on us or I give Phoenix full permission to punch you." Hangman asks, "Oh who cra**ed in your breakfast?" Phoenix points and answers, "Those duds."

Your father calls everyone over and divides the team into two - his team vs Coleman's team. Coleman won the coin toss and picked you first. He should have gone with someone else tbh.

You all are divided and play football on the beach. It's honestly so great and you feel like you really bond with everyone.

Penny prepares lunch for everyone and sets it all out. You're sitting next to Bradley with Phoenix, Bob, and others.

You slowly notice your fries disappearing and you turn to Bradley saying, "Hey! Stop stealing my fries!" He smirks and asks, "What are you gonna do about it?" You answer, "I don't know yet, but I'll get you back."

You all continue to work more and you feel so drained.

You're sitting at the bar at the Hard Deck talking to Penny when you feel someone shaking your shoulders. Penny smiles and walks away as you turn to see Bradley smiling. You ask, "Hi, what's up?" He answers, "Oh not much, just missed you." You reply, "We saw each other all day." He sighs, sits on the stool next to you, and asks, "Wanna dance?" You ask, "Are you sure you don't wanna dance with someone else? That blonde girl across the room seems to like you." He replies, "Boo she is not you. I only wanna dance with you, please." You reply, "Fine fine, how much did you drink tonight anyway?" You stand and he pulls you to the dance floor while answering, "A couple of beers, I can handle it." You nod and you dance with him.

After dancing, Hangman challenges him to darts and you back to the bar. Your feet are killing you once again and you need water. Phoenix shows up and sits next to you before asking, "So what's the deal with you and Bradshaw?" You answer, "We've known each other since birth and have always been close. Why?" She shrugs and answers, "He just seems in love with you, that's all." You laugh and say, "Yeah right, funny Phoenix." She answers, "Come on, you have to see it. On the last mission I was on with Rooster, he kept telling me about this girl back home that he was super into and about someone named Viper. I never thought that the girl and Viper were the same until you said Maverick was your dad. I've seen you and Rooster interact, you like each other. Why don't you tell him?" You answer, "We've always been friends and I don't wanna lose him. by telling him because we could not work out" Penny says, "Sorry for eavesdropping, but I agree with Phoenix. He likes you and you like him. Look at how he begged you to dance with him. That... and he glances over here as he's playing with Hangman." You smile and Phoenix gives Penny a high-five.

After a while, you decide to head out to get rest and Bob stops you. You ask, "Hi Bob, any reason you're stopping me?" He answers, "Yeah haha... Rooster is really annoying right now. He also keeps talking about you, can you take him home? I think he'll just keep drinking and he won't ever go home." You reply, "I don't see why I have to, but since you're my friend, I will do it." He asks, "Really? I'm your friend?" You answer, "Yes really. You're cool, Bob." He smiles and you follow him back to where everyone is standing. Hangman asks, "Were you trying to leave without taking Rooster home?" You ask, "Yeah about that, I don't get why I have to take him home. All of you could do it as well." Hangman answers, "Ah well he said you promised to take him home and you're the only one he'll give his address to." You reply, "Great just great."

You walk over to Bradley and exclaim, "Come on Bradshaw, time to go home." Bradley sighs and says, "That's no fun." You give him a forced smile and reply, "I'm tired so it's fun for me." He replies, "Fine fine." He takes your hand and you practically pull him out of the Hard Deck. You ask, "Did you drive here?" He answers, "No, Phoenix gave me a ride. I told her you would drive me home." You swing onto your motorcycle and reply, "I heard that you said that, now get on and hold on." He replies, "I've never been the one not driving." You reply, "Boo hoo get on Prince." He laughs and gets on behind you. He places his arms around you and asks, "Is this okay?" You answer, "Yeah it's great. You're real comfortable." You rev up the bike and drive to his home. You park in his driveway and he gets off the bike. He asks, "Could you walk me to my door?" You take off your helmet and get off the motorcycle before holding your hand out for him to take. He takes it and you walk with him to his door in silence. Bradley asks, "Do you want to know why I wish your dad wasn't your dad?" You answer, "Sure." He says, "I like you and I've liked you for years. I want to kiss you, but my mind keeps thinking about how your dad would disapprove." You place a light kiss on his cheek and reply, "He likes you, he just needs to talk to you more. I like you too, but you should tell me next time you're sober." He smiles and replies, "Ok. Good night." You hug him before leaving to go home.

You arrive home and surprisingly your dad is not in the living room.

The next few days, Bradley seems off and he won't tell you why. He just answers everything you ask in one word and is hanging out with Hangman. Weird.

It's time for your father to choose who will go with him on the mission and you notice his behavior. You can tell that you're not going to be chosen. He wouldn't risk your life even if he believed you were the best for the mission.

Maverick will fly, accompanied by Phoenix and Bob. Rooster will lead the second strike with Payback and Fanboy.

Everyone starts getting ready and you find your dad outside. You exclaim, "I just wanted to say good luck today, not that you need it." He smiles and says, "I appreciate it, sweetheart. Thank you. If I don't make it back, just know I love you and tell Penny too." You reply, "We're not going to say goodbye dad, we're just saying see you later." He half-smiles and says, "See you later, Viper." You smile and hug him one more time.

You wish Phoenix and Bob good luck as well.

You even tell Fanboy and Payback too. They're cool even if you're not as close to them.

You find Rooster and you exclaim, "So you get to fly the second strike. I guess we finally found out who was the better pilot between us." His eyes look on the verge of tears and he pulls you into a hug. You say, "I guess you're over whatever you've been feeling the last couple of days." He pulls away and says, "Yeah look about that, I did remember what you said when I was drunk, but I was just scared. I was scared of saying it..." You interrupt him and say, "Then don't say it now. Wait. Don't force it because you're going on this mission and you're scared about if you'll survive. Just tell me after. I know you'll make it back." He replies, "Ok. Well goodbye, I guess." You reply, "See you later, not goodbye."

You join Hangman in the control room later as everyone else gets into their planes. Hangman asks, "Did your boyfriend tell you he likes you yet?" You answer, "No, I told him to wait." He replies, "You're insane." You reply, "I mean, Maverick is my father." He laughs.

The mission goes off and things start to go wrong... Rooster and your father keep risking their lives. Rooster went after him and yet he says he hates him. You won't believe it for one more minute.

You and Hangman are sent out to make sure they get back okay.

When you finally land back on the base and your feet are on the ground, you're pulled into a kiss with Rooster. You hear the cheers and you feel yourself smile into the kiss.

Rooster says, "I like you so much and would love to take you on a date." You reply, "You better, you did just kiss me at work in front of almost everyone we know." He replies, "Right I did, may I kiss you again?" You answer, "Sure." He pulls you back into a kiss.

You notice your father walking over and you pull away slightly from Rooster. Your father walks up and pulls you into a hug. You hear your father say, "Not so fast, Bradshaw. Stay over here." You pull away from your hug and your father asks, "So did the two of you finally tell each other your feelings? I've been waiting for years for it." You gasp, "Dad!" Rooster says, "I'm surprised you were rooting for us, Mr. Mitchell." Your father replies, "You two have been each other's person for a lot longer than I think you realize. That's also why I didn't care about Y/N sneaking out to meet with you. I knew she was safe with you." You hug your dad and he says, "Ok, I need to go to the Hard Deck to talk to Penny. See you tonight?" You answer, "Yeah see you later," before he leaves.

You stand near Rooster and exclaim, "You've already gotten parental approval. Drunk you was worried about that." He sighs and replies, "Ugh don't remind me. I don't get why I was so convinced we were dating and you were driving me home." You reply, "I'll be honest, it was weird. But I liked it because I like you." He smiles and asks, "What do you say we change and go out with our friends? You answer, "We should." He asks, "Can I pick you up?" You answer, "Sure."

You shower and change before meeting Bradley outside. You get on the back of his motorcycle and say, "I've never been the one not driving." He laughs and answers, "Ok Princess, hold on tight." You hold him and he drives you both to the Hard Deck.

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

john malevolent doe but he's doing the tma fears thing

(aka arthur lester fears list: the squeakquel)

@if-loki-was-a-fox and @princessbadassofbadassia were talking about it in the comments of this post and it got me thinking and well. ive already done one of these for arthur. so it felt appropriate to do john too. there's a lot of crossover here so i might skip over some things that got mentioned in that list and happened to them both. for the sake of time

in the interest of symmetry i'm just gonna run down the whole list again. up top tho, one thing that i think is Really Neat, and maybe this is just the way i've decided to read things, but arthur's list contained a lot of him being acted on by the fears, whereas john seems to just as, if not more often be the actor. which fits the way tma fears work, with john being more eldritch spooky thing and arthur just being A Guy. ok anyway let's get to it

the eye

...he's eyes. girl he's eyes.

is the Designated Witness for everything that happens to them. is not allowed to look away. the eye is often associated with a fear of being watched but it often positions people in the role of watcher as well, even ppl who aren't necessarily avatars (see: that dude who animorphed into a security system) and there is also. like. the avatars. sooo

per discussion of the dark world, he's unable to break down mentally and so makes for a perfect eternal observer to horror and violence. a ceaseless watcher, if you will

faust. faust faust witness this over and over and you cannot stop it you cannot escape you can't look away you can't even blink if you want to live you have to watch again and again and-

the spiral

not to do the same bit twice in a row but. girl he's madness. he was a madness god.

the distortion is also more specifically associated with deception, manipulating someone's perception of reality, making them trust you over their own senses, which john, much to his own shame and regret, happens to be very predisposed to

season 1 "i'm a friend arthur. also you murdered parker that was all you and i have no idea why you did that haha why did you do that arthur"

and also season 4's lying about anything and everything up to and including shit that was directly in front of their face. the distortion is in his nonexistent fuckin' blood, baby

the end

hm. i'm tempted to count the dark world here, but i'm not sure if that qualifies since while he obviously associates it with death it's not really death in the traditional sense as the end implies it? like it's not an End. it's just different. and worse.

it is Removal From The World though so maybe it counts i am not sure. and like, the dark world is apparently the terminus of all realities, which. makes it feel pretty end aligned?

regardless it does make him very very afraid of the notion of dying, or rather of arthur dying, on account of that means he has to go Back. so.

the stranger

is not human. wants to be human. is trying very hard to be human. sometimes fucking it up. yeah.

using parts of arthur's body as a meat puppet even tho the guy who owns the place is still in there. i still think this is a stranger aligned feature and you can't talk me out of it

him vs the KIY also feels very like a very the stranger conflict to me. "you and i are similar and yet so different as to be almost incomparable, in a way that feels almost paradoxical. and you desire to unmake me and remake me into something Like You, thereby making me unrecognizable to myself. i know you, i do not know you."

edit: apparently the KIY was also literally referred to as "the stranger" for part of the play?? that's fun ty luci

the lonely

isolated from basically all all human connection outside of arthur. that's some lonely shit

on the other side of the coin, tries to intentionally isolate arthur as a response to the above fear, meaning he both gives and receives the lonely in some sense

former isolation in the dark world, too!! yay!!

the month long coma where he just had to sit there, perceiving others but unable to communicate with them in any way. again, an acutely The Lonely experience

the desolation

idk man, hate to sound like a broken record but the dark world seems pretty Desolate

this one's tough with what we have in canon on account of john is both fairly insulated from being harmed, and unable to harm or destroy others directly, while he's with arthur. so.

actually what probably DOES fit here is how he tried to deal with oscar. knowingly trying to destroy something important and meaningful to his friend. yeah.

cauterized his finger too i guess

edit: ALSO the constant threats on arthur's life. the looming fear that he'll lose his friend, the most important person in his world, and be utterly powerless to stop it. and on the flipside, the fact that he's effectively burned arthur's life down once already, just by meeting him (ty loki)

the slaughter

the dark world. again. this time as an endless wheel of indifferent violence that demands submitting to the cycle in order to survive

also killed emily and an unspecified number of others who picked up his book for no real reason

then he escaped and killed parker. also for no reason.

the vast

"As the King In Yellow, I was not hostile towards your kind – I was indifferent. I did not hate or despise you, no more than you despise an ant. You are meaningless." (from part 13)

it's about the intimate understanding of how small a single life appears from the perspective of the gods they face, pressing up against the equal understanding that now he is one of those ants. i think he probably grasps a fear of the Vast more clearly than possibly any human could, because he's seen it from both sides.

has some awareness of timelines even pre-kayne so he's gotta deal with knowing That too as like, a fun bonus

edit: possibly also the dark world AGAIN lmao, considering its nature as something able to contain the refuse of so many realities and as something all-consuming and virtually inesapable (ty luci)

the buried

...actually i don't really have anything for this one

this is his version of arthur's buddying up with the vast i guess

is being confined to small parts of another body claustrophobic? i feel like it might be

he's been through a lot of shit while underground obv but he doesn't really seem specifically bothered by the undergroundness of it in the same way arthur is. he's accepted their lot in life. they're just gonna be underground going through horrible things, apparently. c'est la vie.

edit: ty luci and loki for reminding me about the metaphorical angle here!! you've also got the crushing weight of his past mistakes, the burden of the lies and secrets, the metaphorical mud in his lungs and throat choking him with the equal tension of wanting and not wanting to confess, to be truthful...

the dark

this is the thing that kicked off this whole analysis so i feel like i can just sort of gesture vaguely at it. you get it.

the dark world Is Dark and he is Scared Of The Dark because he Does Not Like Remembering It. before almost anything else, he fears the dark. he knows what it can herald.

also all he can DO is observe. so when he suddenly Can't Observe that is like, extra terrifying for that reason too

the corruption

he's living in his bff's body stealing pieces of it from him destroying his life hurting him and the things he cares about being constantly argued with and belittled and for some reason they love each other regardless. corruption ass relationship

he had to Watch the witch do her thing so, also that,

the web

the web and the KIY are both very associated with plays, puppets, stages, etc. and the idea of pulling another to dance on their strings, maybe even letting the victim believe they're in control while they do

and actually that's another thing he personally does to arthur in s1/s4!

and then kayne is playing him right back 👍

very similar to the Lonely, arthur can more or less revoke his agency whenever he wants and then john is just stuck going along with whatever bullshit he's decided to pull today. which feels web aligned though i may be miscategorizing it i'm not sure

the flesh

oh yeah it's FAUST TIME AGAIN, BABY

also arthur bit his finger off and now one of his fingers is a fucking tree. this too is the flesh

the hunt

he and arthur get to share in the constant terror of being a target for much larger, more dangerous things that want very badly to kill them. they sure do get Hunted an awful lot

aw hey the dark world's back too did you miss it. yeah i imagine this involved a lot of being both the predator and the prey

the extinction

wait i have something for this one this time actually. the dark world is canonically composed at least partially of dead realities right. he's personally witnessed the end of everything. he's been personally privy to extinction. yippee

CONCLUSION: lord almighty this guy is just fears all the way down huh

i know i said this up top but now that i've actually gone thru the whole thing. again. it does feel really fitting, given his nature, that john is often both the recipient of the fears and the vector through which they act on others. like yeah, he's a god turned mortal. of course they can't seem to decide what to do with him. that's fun we love to see it

[pynkhues]

What do you mean when u say Lestat is a Milton’s Satan hero?

Ah! Okay! Going to try and keep this shorter than my Byronic Hero post, haha, but we’ll see how we go.

Before we start…

When we talk about Milton’s Satan as a character archetype, we’re talking about something that was originated in John Milton’s epic poem, Paradise Lost, which was published in 1667. This was before gothic literature was quote-unquote ‘invented’ (as I mentioned in my first Byronic Hero post, gothic literature is widely accepted to have begun with Horace Walpole’s 1764 novel, The Castle of Otranto – worth the read, even just for the bonkers prophecy-speaking skeletons and a character dying from a helmet falling on his head, haha), but had, and continues to have, an enormous impact on gothic literature and horror in general.

The poem is set across twelve ‘books’ (chapters, basically), and is effectively a re-telling of the Book of Genesis but with two narrative throughlines. One throughline is Adam and Eve who represent more conventional biblical heroes in the poem, and the other is Satan (also called Lucifer in the poem). We’ll talk more about them in a sec, but before we begin it’s important to note that Paradise Lost was never intended as a criticism of the church.

Milton was a religious man, which is a really important thing to note when we start talking about Paradise Lost, but he was also heavily influenced as a writer by King Charles I’s autocratic rule and the English Civil War which lasted from 1642-1651. I’m not going to get into the nitty gritty of all of that, but what’s important to note is that he wrote Paradise Lost in a really increased period of anti-authority sentiment in the UK and believed strongly in rebellion against authority, which feeds into how he invented his Satan.

Milton’s Satan in Paradise Lost

Lucifer’s arc in Paradise Lost is a relatively straight forward one. He begins as God’s favourite angel but his pride and his vanity gets the better of him as God starts to invent (and favour) earth and mankind, and he comes to resent God’s authority over the kingdom of heaven. He believes he deserves to be loved as God is, so he leads a rebellion against God, only to lose, and he and the rest of the fallen angels, get cast out of Heaven and into Hell.

Out of spite, Lucifer decides to make Hell his own, with the iconic line “Better to reign in Hell, then serve in Heav’n” and to set his sights on corrupting God’s new favourite thing – Mankind (at this point, just Adam and Eve) – and he’s ultimately pretty darn successful. I’m not going to talk too much about the specific ways that he does that, but it’s basically a mix of deception and sowing seeds of lust, and the end result is that humanity’s corrupted, and God further punishes Satan by turning him and the other fallen angels into snakes.

The devil had been depicted a few times in literature and poetry before this time –most notably in Dante’s Inferno – but these depictions of the devil were always monstrous. Dante’s Satan is a three-mouthed beast keeping his sinner’s constantly in pain, trapped in Hell himself instead of reigning over it, and this is where Milton’s Satan hit the streets and changed character archetypes for good.

Because Milton’s Satan was hot.

Sure, he was evil, proud, vain, impulsive and did terrible things, but he was also charismatic, beautiful, graceful, funny, with all the best lines in the poem. He was “a lonely rebel…[and] an appealing, sympathetic deviant.”

And – I can’t stress this enough – nobody had ever done that before in Western writing.  “[Milton] transformed the way evil was depicted in Western texts and cultural imagery,” and also created the hero-villain archetype, something we now often refer to as an antihero.

On top of that though, Milton’s Satan was deceptive (literally a shapeshifter!), impulsive, had an incestuous family, and made sex sinful by making it lustful (Milton’s thesis over and over in his writing is that sex is great as long as nobody feels lust lol). He was also a loser, haha – he lost every battle he fought, and is in some ways regarded as a caricature of the epic odyssey hero, but look, I’m not going to get into all of that here.

Milton’s Satan is a tragic struggle between the entirely villainous and the entirely heroic.

Let’s just grab a quote from the excellent paper Miltonic Influences in Gothic Victorian Literature:

“As a rejected, troubled child of God, Satan decides to forcefully take what he thinks he should have by birthright. When he does not succeed, he decides to corrupt God’s new children…Satan is narcissistic, vain, proud and jealous. However, he is also remorseful and aware of the wrongness of his actions. He alone thinks he cannot be pardoned for the sins he commits so he forcefully pushes forward in his need for revenge. At the same time, Satan shows disturbingly human characteristics, but also inexplicable immorality. Just when one thinks one can reach a humane reason for Satan’s behaviour, one is left baffled by how evil he actually is.”

The important thing to remember about your Milton’s Satan archetype is that he was not just invented as a means of Milton’s grappling with autocracy and anti-authority sentiment, he was also really Milton’s way of grappling with humanity.

He leaves Adam and Eve as the Biblical heroes of the story, which makes them hard to engage with. What Milton wanted with Satan was to lean into the fallen angel element of him and show him as a character with the capacity for both good and evil, and the tendency to choose evil, thus making him both ultimately tragic, but also more human than the human characters. He was a way for Milton to explore what he felt were his own sins and moral failings, and in the process of that, became a way for readers to explore that too.

Evolution of Milton’s Satan

Milton’s Satan as an archetype has grown a lot over the years since his invention. Even by the time gothic literature started being ‘officially’ written a century later, the character archetype really existed on a spectrum, with some Milton’s Satan’s such as Ambrosio in Matthew Gregory Lewis’ 1796 novel, The Monk leaning more villain than hero, and the Monster in Mary Shelley’s 1818 novel, Frankenstein, who’s cast out by his maker and not given the chance he needs in life to be good. The Monster lacks a lot of Milton’s Satan’s typical traits like pride and self-love, but he continues the archetype’s throughline of being a cast out child who out of loneliness, becomes vengeful against the authority that rejected him and ultimately depraved/

Like I said, this archetype underpins all antiheroes today, and there’s a lot of writing about characters as wide-ranging as Hannibal Lector to Batman as being owing to Milton’s Satan, so there’s heaps out there to read if you’re interested, but yes! Let’s talk a little about Lestat.

Lestat as Milton’s Satan

Trying to keep this short(ish, anyway, haha): I really do think Lestat is born out of this archetype. Lestat’s an anti-authority character – an enormous part of which stems from his father’s autocratic and abusive reign of the household, and the feeling of abandonment by God when his father pulled him out of the church where he’d learn to be a priest only to continue his abuse. Lestat in that sense also faces rejection from three ‘God’s’ / makers not just one one – his spiritual God, his biological father, and later Magnus as his vampiric maker.

Interestingly too, Miltonic Satan’s remain heavily tied to their maker’s even after their rejection. In that paper above on Miltonic Influences in Gothic Victorian Literature, they note:

“The Satanic hero or the hero-villain is a dark, troubled and mysterious individual. He is shaped by life experiences and traits which he inherits from his maker.”

Something the show has reminded us a few times now. Lestat’s grounding in trauma and abandonment is steeped in the Miltonic trope of rejection by authority leading to rejection of authority, but even beyond that, Milton’s Satan is impulsive, morally weak, self-centered, proud, vain, lonely, beautiful but also, vitally, has a capacity for real good and an ability to love (and, more often, lust, haha). He’s a hero-villain that ultimately draws the viewer in because he’s exceptionally human in his monstrousness, and that is what is at the heart of the Milton’s Satan archetype. He’s evil but he’s human in a way traditional villains were robbed of, and similarly, he’s good but he’s human in a way traditional heroes weren’t allow to be, and to me that is Lestat in a nutshell.

[splinteredsweets]

finally decided to do some king candy practice sketches ! and by that i mean fully colour each and every one of them bc i have something wrong with me

rambling + full original images below the cut

as you can porbbaly tell i decided to do 2 versions each - one drawing over the original image to get a better feel for the shapes , and the other version was only looking at the original as a reference and going off what i learned from the first version

these are all posted in the sequential order i finished drawing them in but i actually did the sketches in a different order (original sketches went from 4 , 2 , 1 , 3)

this took me like 12 hours and shockingly 5 of them were the sketches alone lmao although tbf i redid some of the sketches multiple times as i slowly understood the shapes better as i went along ... i think i could've redone another sketch or two in places but i've been at this all day and i knew obsessively worrying about them was just going to drive me nuts but yknow what i'm already planning on doing some more references another time this was really fun and it helped me understand how to draw kc just a little better + a perfect on-base model isn't really what i'm intending to strive for in my future drawings anyway i need to figure out my own style eventually but yknow ✨practice makes perfect✨

anyway i'd definitely have to say my favourite is the second one ('thank you for that stirring introduction') when i was doing that one i just felt my brain cells really go 'in the zone' for lack of a better description ... unfortunately i had to leave 'the zone' bc my ipad was dying (its about 10+ years old so it kinda needs to be on the charger at all times it still does a good job it just needs breaks here and there) and my hands were starting to hurt by that time bc i'd been at it for hours and i needed a dinner break anyway haha but yeah 'the zone' as an unfortunate result left me so i couldn't come up with cool enough backgrounds for the other ones bc i already used all my brain juice oops

anywy i'm really tired i'm gonna go to bed now 😁👍

oh yeah here are the original images yay <3

oh yeah while i was gathering images i also got this one accidentally and there's just something i love about it so have this as a bonus image

there's just something about the like ..... idk how to describe it other than 'HAHAHA I GOTCHA NOW GLITCH' what do you call that emotion between angry and gleeful idk kinda that ig lol

[fannyrosie]

Just want to say I'm a big fan. I'm sure you've answered this before and I apologize if so for the redundancy but where do you shop for your clothes? I know you often get secondhand items, and I've been dying to dip my toes into this style. Thanks for still posting! Your style truly is art 🎨

I am not sure which "style" you are referring to because I wear and combine many different styles. Also, I'll be honest with you, I haven't bought much in the recent years, so most of these might be outdated.

For lolita and other jfashion: I started buying second-hand Japanese brands in 2008 on the now defunct Egl_comm_sales LiveJournal page. The current equivalent is Lace Market, but I have never actually used it (that definitely makes me feel old). I also bought stuff on Japanese auctions between 2010 and 2015, but once again, I don't know if Y!Japan auctions and Mbok still exist? (Edit: they do.) I know people now use Mercari, but I have also never used it. You will need a Japanese shopping service for those. When I moved to Japan in 2016, I just stopped buying online and shopped in person mainly in Closet Child, but also in less specialised second-hand shops (Book off super bazaar, Second-Street and many indie thrift stores). Also, since I have many friends and acquaintances who have similar styles, we just trade, gift and sell clothes to eachother, which is mainly what I have been doing for years now.

Vintage: This is tricky because I don't have special shops I go to. I accumulated clothes and accessories for years from many different thrift shops around Montreal, but also in the countryside around Montreal, and in Japan, mainly from unknown little places around the country or vintage shops in Koenji (where I used to live). I also have old people just giving me some of their things because they like my style haha! I have also visited thrift stores around the UK when I visited in 2013. If you look for online shops, I cannot help you. 😅

Everything else is just from very various thrift shops either around Montreal or in Japan (different cities).

If you are looking for something specific, I think you should ask someone who has started their wardrobe recently for up to date info.

[the-voldsoy]

Parallels/references/a couple theories about TMAGP EP1:

grouped in order of actual theories, vague things i noticed, and even vaguer comments! (using the same terminology as in TMA for ease)

HEAVY Spoilers !!

Stronger:

“Colin, mate, you know you’re never getting out of here” +won't leave until they figure out the errors “Or they finally kill me” → couldn't quit the Archives because they thought they just wanted to understand and know (but later found out they could only get out by dying or blinding)

Lena talks about cake → Mr Spider doesn't like cake + Elias seemed to love the stuff

pub called The Seward -> Peter Lukas vibes?

“There has to be a way to do this online” → haha ! you wish. (AKA supernatural interferes with internet so it cant be dont online)

“There's this box for a "Response 121" on the form.” → MAG121 is the episode Jon is woken from his coma/brought back to life by Oliver Banks

Talk about how there used to be a separate “Response” department → Elias tells Jon its their job to watch, not interfere (iirc)

Old as shit computer → old as shit tape recorders

AKA: the computer seems to be the only thing that can handle the supernatural

“ "Dolls comma watching" or "Dolls comma human skin" “ → violently Stranger and possibly Eye, has me in mind of MAG24 (the one the Calliope is first mentioned in, where the boyfriend is turned into a doll iirc) 

Barely understandable, long as shit file names →barely understandable, long as shit files names by Gertrude 

[in response to where the files go] “some long dead database that no one will ever look at or care about” → the Archives were unmanaged, decrepit and barely used by anyone outside of them

Work during the night - no sun, cut off from outside world → worked in a basement - no sun, cut off from outside world

Martin (and later Jon) taking the statements → did the same in TMA but in reverse (although I’d love to know if there's any reason behind them being called Chester and Norris, besides what's stated?)

Haha Martin and Jon (and Jonah) are now part of the World Wide Web → shit now they're part of the Web (just like with the tape recorders !!)

Someone talks about how they're sorry, they should've listened, couldn't face not hearing him again → martin @ jon and vice versa

Stranger statement with hints of the Dark → first TMA statement was a Stranger in the dark, and it does put me in mind of the Anglerfish tbh

Sorting system for the statements (although there's is a Lot more detailed and v different) → Smirke’s Fourteen

Gwen openly does not like Lena → literally anyone @ Elias

Asked if they were tricked into working here → well, we know the Archives and Elias

“The awful, terrible thing that landed you here?” → most of the Archives (excluding Sasha and maybe Martin) had something that made them Marked, that mostly led to them working there

Someone who's into spelunking listed the Institute as “cleared” → who could that be (if we know them at all)? Buried avatar, i'd guess, but we don't really know any of them

Photos of the Institute don't show up → photos of the supernatural don't work

The Institute was “weird”, made the subject paranoid → lingering Eye

Fire twenty years ago that burned the Institute → Like the fire at Hilltop Road? Or like that time Gertrude tried to burn down the Institute?

Third floor was the most burned → assuming that's the top floor (and correct me if i'm wrong), wasn’t Jonah in (and later killed) on the top floor?

“offices like little cells” → employees were certainly trapped ! also Millbank Prison

Worried non-existent doors were going to slam shut → the Distortion

Weren’t any papers → left behind before the Institute came to this Somewhere Else (assuming it's the same Institute)? (we need an actual name for the original universe and this Somewhere Else)

Suspicious stains on some floors → my darling, that is blood ! or possibly squished worms, or ink. or possibly something Else

“an old wooden thing with a bunch of similar symbols on” → genuinely unsure what this could be

Strange symbols → For all the Fears, or just the Eye, i wonder? I think i remember them saying something about an Eye symbol at this point, but now i can't find where

“you get a job, I get a fresh victim. It’s all in your contract.” → Elias @ his employees

 “To new beginnings, with old friends” → to a new beginning, with our old friends Jon, Martin and Jimmy Magma :)

“You’re not as clever as you think you are. You think you've got us all fooled, that no-one knows you're listening, But I do. I know. I’m going to find you and then…” → hi what did he mean by this

They (jon, martin & jonah) are Watching and Listening and following through technology→ just like Elias (Panopticon vibes tbh) and Sergey Ushanka

Vaguer (idk if theres anyhting here, but wanted to include it anyway):

Alice loves coffee -> Martin loved tea

Meeting in a cemetery → Sasha with Michael pre-prentiss attack, Naomi Herne 

Not wanting to stay at home because it's full of memories → Jon moving with Georgie, Martin moving to the Archives

Gwen Bouchard wants Lena’s job → Bouchard (appeared to) climb the job ladder quicker than he should have

Heh bug list → corruption

 “You don’t seem like the usual hopeless wasters Lena hires” “The awful, terrible thing that landed you here?” → okayy no need to be rude. But anyways the OG Archives crew were actually pretty disconnected from the rest of the world +were barely there by choice?

“freight cars near Brighton” → hey where did Melanie get her first Slaughter mark ?

“it’s not too awkward working with an ex?” → Georgie and Jon?

FR3-d1 -> i feel like there's something there, but i cannot figure it out

Just words that made me irrationally scared:

Stranger(‘s)

Distortion

Opposites:

Starts with a party for someone leaving → couldn't quit the archives

“ …you are perfectly within your rights to resign. No one is forcing you to stay here.”

please put any opinions/additions in the tags !!