#discovery for today: if i can get the courage to do so

[i99zhuo]

Can you make a how to live like song jia for a day ?

How to live like song jia ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ the perfect routine to boost your self-esteem

This is a guide on daily routines inspired by Song Jia! These routines are perfect for people who want to slowly build unbreakable confidence, like freezia!

content list (routines):

morning

study

workout

shower + self care

night

(_ _ ) . . z Z⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚୨ :★: ୧ ∗  ˖࣪ ໒꒱  ˚₊·

✸ ꒰ morning routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

🤍 Jia starts her mornings drinking a cup of water or coffee on an empty stomach, this can help to boost your metabolism and detox your body. I would recommend to drink water rather than coffee, since this could have some negative side effects.

Next step is to say some affirmations in front of the mirror, saying affirmations like 'I look so pretty today' or 'my skin looks so healthy' or simply being kinder to ourselves can ease stress, allow us to face difficulty more courageously, and feel more content and confident!

Now it's time for skincare, Jia emphasizes on having a healthy skincare, for this you will need to create a routine based on your skin type (dry, oily, combination, sensitive, normal or acne prone) and your skin concerns (black heads, bumps, irritation, scars, etc.), please make sure to consult a professional before using anything on your face! Now Jia usually cleanses her face with a foam cleanser and then use toner, a moisturizing ampule, moisturizer and sunscreen! She makes sure to apply the products on her neck too.

After skincare it's time to get dressed, while we wait for the products to absorb! Jia is a really fashionable girl, make sure to have fun with the textures, shapes and color combinations to make the best outfit and boost it using accessories like hats or sunglasses, don't forget to get a matching bag and shoes too!

Time for makeup! Jia's daily makeup consist of BB cream, mascara, eyebrow pencil and lipstick, but if she's shooting something she will add contour, blush, eyeshadow, eyeliner and highlighter to the routine!

✸ ꒰ study routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

🎀 When Jia goes to her Chinese classes she pays attention and does activities in her book, she also practices writing random things like her name! She memorizes vocabulary and practice a little with her friends in the same class.

✸ ꒰ workout routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

🦢 Jia recommends to work out at least for 20 minutes per day! She usually does simple waist or legs exercises while standing up looking at her phone or watching TV.

Also she goes to Pilates classes so you can try to do a 20 minute Pilates workout video like this one.

✸ ꒰ shower and self care routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

🩰 To boost your self-esteem Jia says that we have to at least take 2 days of the week (Saturday and Sunday) on really taking care and spend time with ourselves.

First detangle your hair using a hairbrush, then hop on the shower and use shampoo, conditioner and a hair mask to treat your hair. Then wash your body using a shower gel and a body scrub. Jia uses a soothing gel, thermal water and a body lotion to moisturize her body after shower, she massages the products on her skin to relax her muscles. After 30 minutes, she dries her hair with cold air. After, you can trim your split ends or take care of your nails if necessary.

As a part of self-care, do chores like doing laundry or washing the dishes so you can start relaxing on a tidy place (you can also light an scented candle). Also, Jia takes her vitamins for her hair and overall health.

Now it's time to enjoy our hobbies! Having hobbies help us with both our physical and mental health, plus having our alone time makes us more comfortable with ourselves and help with self -discovery, Jia haves a good set of hobbies that she spends most of her time doing like oil painting, doing DIYs, watching dramas like insider, taking care of her dogs, cooking and baking, playing video games and golf!

✸ ꒰ night routine ꒱⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

🌷 Finally, Jia spends her night taking care of her skin! First she washes her hands, the uses a cleansing oil or milk, then she uses makeup remover on her eyes if the cleanser didn't take off her eyeliner for example, then she uses a foam cleanser and toner to finish cleanse her skin. After she uses a hydrating mist and ampule, a dermatologic treatment, sheet mask, lip balm and moisturizer (remember to apply it on the neck too!) after she uses a gua sha to massage her face.

as a part of skincare, make sure to sleep at least 8 hours everyday and drink enough water to wake up with perfect skin!

(_ _ ) . . z Z⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚୨ :★: ୧ ∗  ˖࣪ ໒꒱  ˚₊·

Heyyy ty for reading!! This is my first request everrrr I'm so excited <3 🥹🥹, sorry for being inactive, school has been killing me but I'm finally on my summer break! Also sorry this took me a lot of time to do >.< i had to do a marathon of Jia's videos to make this

Hehe i think that's all stay tuned ໒꒰ྀི´• ˕ •` ꒱ྀིა

toodlez!!!!!!

[anzynai]

New Discoveries

Akito x Toya (Project Sekai)

a/n: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEST FRIEND IN THE ENTIRE WORLD @thatonetickleblog im so glad to be spending your birthday with u another year and ofc i had to do the traditional birthday fic.. chose akitoya cuz that was at the top of ur list when i asked so i hope u enjoy it! worked very hard on it.. i sweat, i cried, i bled, but i mean. u dont have to like it if u dont want to. i mean. irs not a big deal…. ANYWAYS, enough talking. happy birthday and hope u enjoy this sickeningly romantic akitoya tickle fic LOVE YOUUU 🫶

summary: today was the day that akito was going to confess to akito. things turn out much better than he expected.

word count: 1.3k

——

Today was the day.

Today was the day that Akito was going to confess to Toya. After lots and lots of nudging and encouragement from Kohane, An, and even Ena, he decided to gather his courage and tell Toya about his feelings for him. He honestly had no idea if Toya returned his feelings, but he would just rather be honest than hide it from him. Even if Toya didn’t like him back, he was sure the other wouldn’t stop being friends with him over it.. at least, he hoped.

At the moment, he was at the park, idly sitting on some swings waiting for his other groupmate to arrive. It was getting late, so there was no one there, which he was grateful for. He always felt a bit awkward singing in front of a crowd if it wasn’t at a show. The nervousness he felt in his stomach did not compare to how he felt when he finally saw Toya walking towards him, his heart settling deep into his stomach. He took a deep breath, then attempted to smile weakly.

“Toya.” He said, watching as the other let an easy smile slip into his face that completely melted Akito’s heart (as much as he would hate to admit it).

Forcing himself to act somewhat normal, he swallowed and watched the other join the swing beside him. “Ready?”

“Of course.” And the two spent the next hour running their duet together. Akito never really felt that he could admire Toya’s singing voice enough. Where his was powerful and loud, Toya’s was gentle and soft in a way that made you feel like you could fall asleep to it. It was truly his favorite sound. His normal voice was not much different, calm and controlled. Akito liked to listen to his voice.

“Sounds pretty good, huh?” Akito said after they finally ran through their duet without any mistakes and Toya nodded, agreeing. The pair fell into silence. By now, the sun had nearly set, causing a red glow in the sky and Akito allowed himself to think that Toya looked beautiful like this, and that’s when he realized it. It was time.

Taking a deep breath, because confessing is hard, he starts before he can talk himself out of it.

“Toya.” He says, but the other has decided to speak up too.

“Akito.”

“Ah— sorry. You.. first.” Akito mumbled, feeling embarrassed all of a sudden. Toya looked down and paused, before making eye contact with Akito. A faint blush was planted on his features.

“Akito, I like you.”

What?

What?!

For a moment, Akito couldn’t respond. He couldn’t think at all, in complete disbelief, because not only did Toya like him of all people, he beat him to the punch. He cleared his throat as it started to feel dry and he brought a hand to his face.

“Y-you… wait, you like me?” Akito asked.

The blush on Toya’s face was more noticeable now and Akito would have teased him about it if he wasn’t sure that his face was just as flushed.

“I do.” Toya nodded. “Do you like me back?”

Yes. Is that even a question? Akito thought.

Then, he remembered Toya can’t read his mind and looked up at the other, awaiting his response. Akito averted his eyes.

“Of course I do.. wasn’t it obvious?” Akito muttered, quietly, but Toya heard it and when Akito looked back at him, the smile on Toya’s lips was one he would have spent all of his savings to see just for a second longer.

“Not at all.” Toya said. It shocked Akito, but Toya had always been.. sort of oblivious about these kinds of things. Afterall, everyone else seemed to know.

“Are we.. dating then?” Akito mumbled, fidgeting with his fingers. He wasn’t sure if it was a stupid question, but he had to know and he needed a clear answer.

“Do you want to?” Toya responded, looking a bit nervous. As if he had anything to worry about, Akito thought to himself.

“Obviously.. you idiot.” Akito groaned, trying to ignore the fact his heart was racing a mile a minute and he was resisting the urge to die of happiness.

“So then.. what now?” Toya asked, when they both fell silent. Feeling bold, Akito allowed a smirk to slip onto his face. He took Toya’s face, pulling it closer to his.

“This.” He replied, when their lips finally met. He felt Toya smile against his mouth as the other deepened the kiss.

They each allowed their hands to roam, touching the other with fervor and desire they had always been afraid to act on. It was perfect. Akito had never felt happier and part of him wished that moments like this would never have to end.

And well, maybe it didn’t.

Because Toya liked him back. He liked him back.

He continued kissing Toya, biting his lip and relishing in the gasp Toya let out. That is, until Akito let out a gasp of his own.. for a completely different reason.

Toya’s hands had ended up caressing his backs and sides, two spots that made Akito feel ticklish. Toya didn’t seem to notice, but as he kept doing it, it was harder for Akito to keep his reactions at bay.

When he gasps again, Toya pulls away, concern written in his expression. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Akito responded, unable to come up with a believable excuse. Toya looked at him with doubt.

“Are you sure? You were moving around a lot..” Toya examined his body before he seemed to come up with some conclusion. “Are you hurt?” He gently grazed his sides, as if trying to feel for an injury. Akito, not expecting his touch, giggled.

And then, it seems to click what was going on.

“Oh.” Toya realized, eyes widening and Akito blushes. Then, Toya sent him an amused smile and begins to tickle him… and Akito let him.

“T-tohohohoya!” Akito laughed, his voice raising an embarrassing octave.

“How have I never known you were ticklish?” Toya wondered, seemingly amazed by his discovery.

“I-I dohohon’t knohohow! Stahahap!” Akito gasped, squirming in the swing. It makes tickling Akito harder for Toya, but he doesn’t look like he minds.

“Do you really want me to?” Toya asked with a raised brow. The dying protests are all he needs as an answer.

“Hahahahaha!” Akito laughed, his hands trying to get Toya away from him.

“You’re beautiful.” He heard the other mutter, flustering him. The tickling was bad enough, but this was too much!

“Dohohon’t sahahahay thahat!” Akito chuckled, hiding his face with his hands. That idea backfired, because it gave Toya a lot more options to tickle him at.

“Say what?” Toya looked genuinely confused, making Akito feel like such a loser. He should not get so flustered by one measly compliment! “That you’re beautiful?”

Akito nodded, a squeal passing through his lips when Toya found a particularly sensitive spot on his ribs.

“But you are. You’re gorgeous. I’ve always known that.” And if Akito thought his face was burning before, he is sure he is one second away from spontaneously combusting right there. He tried groaning, but it sounded strangled.

“Nohohoho!”

“No?”

“Nohoho! Tohohoya!”

“Yes?” The worst thing about the situation was that Toya was absolutely amazing at tickling, his fingers precise and evilly gentle. It didn’t hurt at all and the touches were so light, Akito was shocked that he could feel it.. and feel it this much.

“Nohoho mohohore!” Akito shrieked, at last, when his cheeks began to hurt from smiling. Toya stopped, peppering his face with kisses. It flustered Akito to no end, but he didn’t stop the other, taking a few moments to catch his breath.

“Are you alright?” Toya asked, looking him in the eyes.

Akito smiled, looking back at him. “Yeah. I am.” Then he forced himself to frown. “But..”

“But?” Toya looked worried and he almost felt bad.

“Isn’t it your turn now?” Akito smiled, mischievous and devilishly. Toya unconsciously began moving back.

“W-whahahahaat?!” Toya laughed, now finding himself to be the victim as Akito pounced.

Akito looked at his partner—his boyfriend— laughing beside him and he couldn’t help but laugh as well. Yeah, he could get used to this.

[ashwithane]

happy 5th anniversary, fire emblem three houses!

i didn’t have time to do anything super elaborate, but i’m glad i could at least make some simple drawings of how i looked when the game released vs how i look now. i tried to give them a similar vibe to the in-game portraits haha

rant below about my feelings right now because there’s a Lot to say! content warning for mental illness and childhood trauma 🫠🤙

as you can see in the drawings, i’ve come a long way in the past five years. when three houses first released, i was a deeply insecure high schooler who never dared to speak up or express themself. i struggled with self worth issues and had long since begun developing ocd symptoms as a result of the fear i had that there was something wrong with me, something i couldn’t possibly know or change but that everyone would see if i made a single wrong move.

throughout high school, and my adolescence as a whole, i had a hard time connecting with people. but when i played three houses, i connected with the story, the characters, the ability to replay it again and again and always try something new, change characters’ classes and find new paired endings and discover the little details i hadn’t noticed before. i was playing three houses the weekend after covid lockdown was announced, and i remember talking to one of my friends about this cool game i’d just started my second playthrough of. we laughed and talked about the game, figuring that lockdown would only last a few weeks, and then things would be back to normal.

lockdown was difficult for me, as it was for most people. but at the same time, not going to school in person meant i could afford to let my guard down. i could afford to unmask, and discover who i was when i didn’t spend every moment in fear of what others would think. and so when lockdown ended, i started college still timid, but somewhat more familiar with who i was inside.

and then, one day, a thought hit me out of nowhere.

“am i trans???”

and thus began the journey of self-discovery that was my first summer after college. i started using the name ashe, started using any pronouns and later switched to just they/them. i also finally got up the courage to tell my parents i wanted to get tested for autism, and came back with that diagnosis to explain almost everything i hadn’t had the words to understand before.

recently, my mental health has gotten worse. i got diagnosed with anxiety at the same time i got my autism diagnosis, but nobody told me i have ocd as well until earlier this year. things took a nosedive for me over this past school year—i stopped taking risks, barely left my college campus, barely allowed myself to put effort into social connections out of fear that i’d be forcing people to put up with me. but through therapy and medication, i’ve been working through those feelings, and the fears my brain internalized as a result of the way i grew up: feeling like something was wrong with me, but not knowing what. today, i feel pretty good! i’ve been having more and more good days, so i’m overall optimistic about what my future holds.

to bring this back on topic, fire emblem: three houses has gotten me through countless tough times, and has been immensely helpful in figuring out who i am. so in honor of the anniversary, i’d like to give a special thank you to the characters who have been the most important to me over the past five years.

ashe: i’ll start with the obvious. ashe is the character i stole my name from, so of course he will always hold a special place in my heart. in addition to that though, ashe’s earnest personality and commitment to doing the right thing is immensely inspiring to me. he proves that it’s possible to make mistakes and grow from them, that your life isn’t over after one misstep. ashe has taught me to never give up on doing the right thing, and being the best version of myself i can be.

felix: this list would not be complete without the scrunkly of all time! obviously i find felix to be a very compelling character and fun to write, but his significance to me goes beyond being a writing muse. i’ve often thought that i wish i’d had a friend like felix when i was younger, and even now—someone who would drag me into situations i found stressful and encourage me (in his own rude way) to have confidence in myself. someone who would have stood up for me against the people who treated me like i was lesser. felix inspires me to fight for what i want, his shield symbolizing the ability to make your own choices for what and who you defend. he reminds me that there’s no glory in being a martyr, and so i shouldn’t make my well being a second priority. i love you felix and i’m sorry i put you through the horrors regularly (but not sorry enough to stop).

marianne: it’s probably concerning to say i see a lot of myself in marianne. her journey is incredibly inspiring to me, especially now as i see that the past five years have taken me along a similar path to hers. marianne starts out thinking she’s too different from everyone else to deserve a life like theirs, and condemns herself to crushing loneliness all to avoid the possibility of her hurting the people she loves. and yet she learns to live for herself, realizes that her mere existence doesn’t cause any harm, and learns to embrace her right to enjoy life. i hope to have the same strength she does, so that one day i can reach that point as well.

linhardt: no joke, i realized i was neurodivergent because of linhardt. so many of his lines and support conversations made me go “ha, he’s so autistic/adhd coded!” i made these comments repeatedly, but i also kept noticing all the little ways in which i related to him. linhardt was one of many autistic people who made me go “huh, i do that too! what do you mean that’s not normal???” his character also serves as a reminder that it’s okay to take a break once and a while, and that looking after myself doesn’t mean i don’t care about others.

if there’s one thing left to say, it’s thank you. thank you to ashe, felix, marianne, linhardt, mercedes, sylvain, ignatz, hapi, yuri, hell—my oc rowan, all the characters i’ve connected with and loved so deeply over the past five years. thank you fire emblem three houses, not for being the only reason i am where i am today, but being a major part of it nonetheless. and if anyone’s still reading, thank you for making it this far, and happy timeskip! 🎉

[nothing-but-luv-for-you]

do you have any tips for high school? im starting today but im nervous 😭😭😭

I AM SO LATE . i really hope your day was alright , honey ! how was it ?

some tips :

always , ALWAYS bring hygiene essentials (deodorant & feminine products at the very bare minimum)

never know when you or someone else might need them !

go to bed earlier , don’t be on your electronics or any screens at least an hour before you decide to sleep

you will feel like shit if you fall asleep doomscrolling or staying up past midnight on your phone , ngl that’s just fact . your rest is so important ! high school can be a little bit of a change in comparison to middle and elementary . i’ve found that your first year is usually acts as a transition period between middle and high school , and you’ll get a gist of it all .

set time aside for yourself

i cannot stress how important it is to prioritize yourself , especially in high school . i know it might sound like a load of fluff , but i’ve found that high school has been a period of self-discovery for me whilst also having to balance extracurriculars and school work . always , always spend at least ten minutes with yourself , away from school work and phones and all of that .

find your interests

i found myself so lost my freshman year of hs . for the first three months , i consistently talked to two people in only one of my four classes . i felt so alone , and i wallowed in that . i wish i had the courage to step out of my bubble then , and maybe i would’ve gotten to where i am now sooner . joining theatre at my school truly did wonders for me ; i was surrounded by people who cared about similar things as me , and who were passionate as me . it did wonders for me .

compliment someone ! (or something like that)

i found that making small goals helped me a lot . be it , making sure i have a snack after PE or smiling at someone in the hall , really helped me ground myself . i have a personal goal of complimenting at least one person , be it a friend or a stranger . it helped me grow more confident in my own self and build my courage (that’s not to say i don’t still struggle)

be gentle with yourself , alright ? failure does not define you . listen to your gut when it tells you someone is bad for you . on the flip side , learn to trust others , too . not everyone is out to hurt you .

let me know if you want to hear any more tips ! i sort of rushed my response now because i’m getting back so late T^T . i hope your first day went well , luv !

[momentsbeforemass]

Problems with God

I get to hear a lot of people’s problems with God.

Things they don’t understand. Things they object to. Things they have against God.

As someone with a collar and a title, it means a lot to me that people trust me enough to tell me their problems with God.

Because for a lot of people, the roots of their problems with God go back to someone with a collar and a title. So telling me about it? That takes some courage.

One of the biggest problems that people have with God? It’s one that I know well. Because I still struggle with it sometimes – having to understand something in order for it to be true.

It’s a subtle way that pride smuggles itself into our thoughts. It’s subtle, because almost nobody says it that way. In practice, it sounds much more sensible, because it goes something like this,

How can bread and wine be the Body and Blood of Christ? I’ve seen it before Mass and after the consecration – there’s no visible difference. It still looks like bread and wine.

Translation – I don’t understand it, therefore it isn’t true.

This approach isn’tt limited to problems with the Eucharist. But no matter what it’s applied to, when you boil that statement down to its essence, it doesn’t work. Because it’s nonsense. Here’s what I mean,

A friend of mine donated one of his kidneys to his daughter.

I don’t understand how organ transplants work.

According to the standard of “I don’t understand it, therefore it isn’t true,” the operation must have been a failure.

And yet – notwithstanding my complete lack of understanding – the transplant was a success. Fifteen years (and a grandchild) later, both my friend and his daughter are fine.

Which tells me what? That however much I think I know, I do not possess the sum total of human knowledge. Which means that there are things that are completely true that I do not understand.

The fact that knowledge continues to grow and new discoveries are made shows us that this is a universal experience. Also, that there are things that no human being understands. And that our collective lack of understanding has no impact on their truth.

The antidote to all of this, to the vanity and closemindedness that comes with “I don’t understand it, therefore it isn’t true?” We see it in today’s Gospel. In Mary’s lived example of humility.

Instead of having to have it all figured out, instead of demanding to know exactly how it’s all going to work. Mary lives in peace. How?

By not trusting to her own understanding. By not insisting that she is the standard by which everything is to be measured.

Instead, Mary waits on God for the next step. Trusting that the Creator of the universe can handle things just fine. Even if she doesn’t completely understand how.

Mary does that (as today’s Gospel shows us) even in the darkest moments of her life. Showing you and me the source of her peace.

Showing us how to have peace in the middle of life’s very worst.

Today’s Readings

[edupunkn00b]

The Uses of Adversity, Ch. 17: Coming Clean

Prev - Coming Clean - Next - Masterpost - [ AO3 ]

Roman, Logan, and the boys go to see Spider-Man WC: 3764 - Rated: G - CW: minor injury and a lotta fluff

Secrets collecting dust, but never forget Skeletons come to life in my closet I've found out what it takes to be a man Well, Mom and Dad'll never understand What's happening to me? - Coming Clean, by Green Day (cover by Ezra Furman) -

Laughter from the kitchen seeped under the door when Remy turned off the shower, Jacinta’s higher giggle layering with Emile’s deep belly laugh. He scrubbed a towel over his hair, grinning. He loved to hear them together. It wasn’t that he’d ever actually expected them not to get along, it was just… nice to get to overhear it sometimes.

He and Jacinta had been friends for years and she’d supported him—and nudged him—every single time he’d needed a shoulder to cry on or a sharp kick in the ass to get his life together. Without her he never would’ve gotten to Westen, never would’ve even met Emile, let alone had the courage to talk to him. And Emile?

Emile was his everything. He carefully dried and polished his engagement ring, smiling at the way it sparkled under the heat lamp. He stared at it for a long time, his other hand coming up to the chain around his neck. After the way Roman had immediately clocked their matching rings, despite the way they wore them on different fingers, Remy had started wearing his ring on his neck whenever there was a chance of bumping into his dad.

But not this time. He grinned again and got dressed, keeping his engagement ring on his left hand where it belonged.

By the time he’d gotten downstairs, another voice had joined the mix and he clapped his brother on the back before hugging Jacinta. “Virge, I would’ve picked you up,” he said. “You didn’t have to walk all the way over from North Campus.”

“It’s nice out,” he shrugged. “I think some bossy older brother told me I needed more vitamin D, anyway.”

Laughing, Emile pressed a mocha into his hands. “I think he’s got you there.” Emile’s hand lingered over Remy’s left, fingertips tracing his ring. “You’re wearing it,” he murmured.

Remy nodded and brushed a small kiss near his ear. “About time, isn’t it?”

“I still think you’re worried about nothing,” Virgil butted in and levered himself up on the counter before taking a too-big bite of one the homemade orejas Jacinta had brought. “He’s not Mom.” He washed down another bite before laughing. “Besides, you saw him with Ro…” He winked at Emile. “You two can double date.”

“That’s what I said!” Emile laughed, hugging him from the side.

Remy frowned at his coffee. “You really think he likes Roman?”

“You think he doesn’t?”

Remy looked around the room, searching for an ally. All three faces turned toward him, incredulous. He sighed. Even outnumbered, he would not bank so much on a guess. “What makes you think he likes him? Dad’s not gay… I mean… He’s never said anything…”

“Neither have you,” Jacinta reminded him, lacing up her ass-kicking boots.

Virgil poked around in the tupperware and pulled out another giant pastry. “How long exactly did Dad keep on about Ro after their ‘visit’ to the theatre?”

“You’re holdin’ out on me!” Jacinta’s jaw dropped. “Roman Prince took your dad to the theatre?”

“See,” Virgil smirked. “Jacinta gets it.”

“They were… they were just talking about the Shakespeare Summer and—”

“Yeah,” he rolled his eyes. “And it was all ‘Roman’s doing this, Roman’s doing that, and ‘Oh, did I tell you the funny thing Roman said on the way home?’”

Jacinta laughed and hip checked Emile as she picked an orejas for herself. “He sounds just like the two of you.”

Virgil high fived her. “Exactly.”

Remy looked back at Emile, his fiancee’s eyes still bright with the discovery that he wasn’t going to hide his ring when he went to see his dad. He nodded. “I’ll tell him today.” Emile grinned and the tears in his eyes squeezed Remy’s heart. “I’m gonna tell him everything,” he whispered and cupped his cheek. “Thank you,” he added, leaning in for a soft kiss.

“For what?” Emile whispered back, cheeks an adorable pink that almost matched his hair.

“For giving me time.” He kissed him again. “I love you, Babe.”

“Alright, alright, get a room,” Virgil laughed.

Remy turned, one arm still looped around Emile’s waist. “You’re in our house.”

“Eh, semantics,” Jacinta giggled and let out a little whoop when Emile dipped Remy to return his kiss.

~

“Dad? Pat?” Remy called from the doorway. “We’re here!”

“I’m in the kitchen!” Dad’s voice was hard to hear over the sound of the sink and the dishwasher. “We’re just a little behind schedule.”

“Hey, Virge,” Patton hung half-way over the bannister. “Can I borrow your old Spider-Man costume? Mine’s too small.”

“Well, yeah, Pat,” Virgil laughed, giving Dad a quick hug before racing up the stairs. “You’ve grown like a foot since you last wore it.”

“‘Trust me,’” Patton laughed, dropping his voice and putting on a heavy Brooklyn accent. “‘It doesn’t always fit.’”

Laughing, Dad gave him a hug and beckoned him into the kitchen. “Are you hungry? We had burritos for lunch. All the toppings are in the fridge.”

“Nah, we’re good. We got sandwiches at Wood’s for the car ride down.” He picked up a towel to start to dry the hand-washed dishes in the drainer. “Gotta save room for popcorn and Mike and Ikes.”

“Very true,” Dad chuckled and continued rinsing the soapy dishes in the basin.

Remy diligently dried the saucepan in his hands before putting it away, and he imagined every glint of the ring on his hand lit up the room like a disco ball. He was pretty sure Dad hadn’t noticed it, yet. “So, um, is Ro here yet?”

“He’ll be here any minute,” he nodded, smiling and looking out the window, scanning the street outside like he might catch a glimpse of him approaching the house. Shit, maybe Virge really was right. Of course, Remy knew Ro had feelings. His heart was big enough to see from space, but Dad? Huh.

“He’s really excited,” Dad added, voice a little lower now. “It means a lot to him, I think, that you included him.”

“Of course,” Remy grinned. “Ro’s awesome! And…” He kept his eyes on the cheese grater, carefully drying between each little divot. “It seems like he really makes you happy, too.”

“Of—of course. He’s… it’s…” A sudsy glass slipped from Dad’s hand but he caught it before it hit the sink. He cleared his throat. “It’s really nice to reconnect. And you know, we… we have a lot of shared interests.”

Remy snuck a glance and Dad’s cheeks were bright red. He grinned down at the bone dry grater and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah you do.” 

He’d just put away the grater when the doorbell rang. Dad jumped, then swore under his breath. “Dad?”

“Sorry. It’s just a nick,” he said, rinsing a knife with one hand and setting it point down in the drainer before turning off the water. “Would you, ah,” he looked over his shoulder. “Would you answer the door?”

“Yeah, of course, Dad.” He moved to the hall and called up the stairs as he passed. “Hey, guys, Ro’s here!”

“‘You can’t rush art!’” Pat called back and Remy shook his head, laughing. 

He opened the door and grinned. “Ro! Just in time!” he laughed. “No-one’s ready.”

“Perfect!” Ro cheered, laughing with him. He opened his arm in a gentle invitation, and Remy hugged him, patting his back. “Dad’s been looking forward to this,” he whispered, pulling back with a little wink. 

“Yeah?” he whispered back, a mix of hope and nervousness washing over his expression.

“Oh, yeah,” Remy nodded, ushering Ro inside and gesturing down the hall. “He’s in the kitchen.” 

Still smiling, he toed off his shoes and walked inside, but stopped short. “Lo?”

“My apologies,” Dad murmured, his voice a little strained. Remy peered around Ro to see. He stood by the sink, a kitchen towel squeezed around his hand. “I tried to catch a knife as it fell and, well…” He tried to laugh. “One should not try that at home.”

Ro put down the small shopping bag he carried and approached him, hands open. “May I?” Dad nodded and Remy moved in closer, watching as Ro peeled back the towel. Blood welled from a two-inch cut below his thumb.

“Dad!” 

“I’ll be alright, Rem. It’s okay,” he murmured, nodding. “Just need some butterfly bandages. They’re in the kit,” he looked up at Ro. “It’s…”

He smiled. “Mm-hm, under the sink.” Ro walked Dad over to a chair, and helped him sit, elbow resting on the table with his injured hand held higher than his heart. Then he got the old first aid kit. Remy stood frozen in the middle of the kitchen and stared, eyes torn between the growing red spot on the towel wrapped around Dad’s hand and the twitch in his jaw. “Are you sure you don’t want stitches, Dad? Evergreen’s fast and it’s just up the street.” 

Dad’s voice, strained and shaky, but despite his watery eyes, somehow calm. His jaw was clenched, lips trembling, but he wasn’t angry… just… Just hurting. “No, Rem, Mom’s right.” Dad put his keys back in his pocket and looked down at his hand. His fingers were swollen and they curled funny against his palm. “I will be fine. I can take care of this here at home. I just need some ice and it’ll heal right up.”

He smiled, thin and tight, but warm, and he crouched down to look him in the eye. “Thank you for looking out for me. I’ll be okay. You don’t need to worry, Rem.” Dad nodded and pulled him into a bear hug, squeezing him tightly even as he felt his dad’s hand shake against his back. “You’re a good kid. Why don’t you go blow more bubbles with Virge outside? I’ll call you when dinner’s ready? Okay?”

Dad’s eyes met his and he nodded as though he could read his mind. “The butterfly bandages will work for this, Rem. It’s… it really is okay.”

Remy watched the concern on Ro’s face, his gentle hands as he dabbed at Dad’s cut with a piece of alcohol-soaked gauze. 

“Sorry for the sting,” Ro murmured and blew against the cut, eyes up and watching his reactions. Dad’s face relaxed, the tremor in his jaw nearly gone.

Remy smiled. “Yeah,” he nodded and crouched next to his chair to hug him. “Yeah, I know, Dad.” He watched Roman oh-so-carefully apply the first butterfly bandage on his hand, then gave Dad another little side hug. “I’ll finish up the dishes.”

“Oh… thank you, Rem,” Dad said.

“No more knife catching for you, Mister,” Ro joked, eyes worried over his smile.

“Damn, there goes my career in the circus,” Dad deadpanned.

That pulled a little laugh from Ro, and Remy didn’t miss the way Dad’s other hand rested close to his as he worked on the wound. “I suppose you’ll be forced to fall back on that law practice now.” Ro placed another strip then laughed again. “Oh, but there’s always the trapeze.”

~

Even with all the distractions—and the Friendly Neighborhood Cosplayers needing ‘five more minutes’ for a half an hour, by some miracle, they made it to the theatre in enough time to buy popcorn before the movie started. There was a short line, and as Patton and Virgil dragged Ro off to the mini-arcade at the other side of the lobby, Ro reached back and waved, calling to them. Well, definitely calling to Dad.

“‘Parting is such sweet sorrow!’” He winked, laughing as Patton groaned at his dramatics. “‘That I shall say good night till it be morrow.’” He shrugged and gestured around the lobby. “Or at least until we finish a round of Out Run!”

Laughing, Remy stuck by Dad’s left side, ready to manage the treats to make sure he rested his hand. As they waited in line, they watched the trio’s antics. Finally, Patton and Virgil flipped a coin for who would play against Ro first.

“That’s alright,” Patton laughed, perched between the racing seats when Virgil got heads. “You need to warm up before you go head to head with me, anyway!”

“Hmm,” Ro grinned. “That sounds like a challenge to me.”

Meanwhile, Virgil tapped through the countdown and floored the accelerator. “Enough trash talk, let’s go!”

“Do you think we’ll ever be able to pry them away from the arcade when it’s time for the movie?” Dad asked, laughter in his voice.

“It’ll be easy,” Remy grinned. “You pull Ro away and the other two’ll follow.”

Popcorn, candies, and drinks in hand, it took one more quick round of finagling the gamers before they settled in their seats. Patton swooped in to sit between Dad and Ro, and Virgil sat on Ro’s other side. Remy sat at Dad’s left, but leaned over and tapped Patton’s knee. “Pat,” he whispered. “Don’t you think—”

“It’s starting, it’s starting!” he wiggled in his seat, grabbing each of the adults’ hands and staring at the screen. Dad chuckled and kissed his head like he was five again before he settled in his seat and smiled at Remy.

“Thanks for all your help this afternoon,” he whispered.

“Anytime, Dad. Mike and Ike?”

~

The movie… damn. The movie hit a little close to home.

Sitting next to his dad, Remy leaned forward each time Miles almost told his parents the truth. At least once, he felt Ro’s eyes glancing over at him. He wasn’t just imagining the parallels. And Dad?

When Miles’ mom fixed his coat and talked about how nothing could make her stop loving him, and how she wanted the world to love him and care for him, too, he swore he heard Dad sniffling. He reached past Ro and patted Virgil’s shoulder, then kissed Pat’s head again. As he leaned, Remy leaned with him, head resting on Dad’s shoulder. Then Dad tilted his head, too, cheek pressed against the top of his head the way he did when he was little.

Later in the movie, he must’ve gasped when Miles finally told his mom and she just laughed, because Dad squeezed his hand. “It’s okay. Watch,” he whispered, just before Remy realized it, too.

“Oh, no…” he whispered back, turning up to look at his dad.

“Yeah…” he nodded.

~

As the last of the credits scrolled up the screen, Pat recited the fiction disclaimer and Ro joined in at the end, each of them putting on their most serious announcer voices. “‘And any similarity to actual events or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.’”

“God, I hope so,” Virge muttered, laughing under his breath.

“Can we see it again?” Patton sat crouched on his seat, pressing the tilt and forward buttons so he rocked back and forth. “And when does the next one come out?”

“I think we’ve got a couple years to wait for the third installment,” Dad laughed, checking their seats for anything they might have dropped. “We waited a long time for this one, we can do it again,” he added, ruffling Pat’s hair when he pouted.

“Yeah, weren’t you still in diapers when the first one came out?”

“Was not!” Pat retorted. “Besides, you wanna admit you lost Out Run to a diaper baby? Dad,” he tugged his sleeve, leaping to his feet. “Can we go see if the game is free?”

“Go for it, we’ll catch up,” he nodded, patting his pockets before grabbing an empty candy box someone—probably Pat—left behind.

Ro caught his eye, eyebrows raised. “No time like now to tell him…” he quickly signed while Dad was looking away.

Remy nodded and Ro brushed his hand on Dad’s arm, just shy of his hand. “I’ll  make sure they keep it down to a low roar.” They both laughed when Patton’s voice carried from the open theatre door.

“You do like a challenge,” Dad shook his head, still laughing as Ro moved down the aisle to intercept the friendly war between his younger brothers.

Ro bowed with a smile. “‘Dream in light years,’” he said, giving them one more wave.

“‘And challenge miles,’” Dad murmured. Ro caught it, though, and beamed as he slipped away to follow Pat and Virgil. Remy shook his head, grinning. For once, he’d be glad to admit his little brother had been right.

They walked quietly through the theatre. Now that they were properly alone and Remy had Dad’s complete and undivided attention, he… he didn’t know how to start. Hey, Dad, I’ve been lying to you for years and I’m about to marry my ‘roommate.’

Dad seemed to sense he had something to say, though, and he gave him time to think, glancing over every now and then with a little smile.

“How’s your hand?” Remy asked, stalling, hoping for some miracle segway that would make this easier.

“Not bad,” he nodded, showing how the bandage still held, the white gauze beneath clear of any seepage.

“That’s good.”

~

“Hey, wanna play?” Pat asked when they approached.

“Oh, next time, Pat,” Dad said, ruffling his hair. But then he looked right at Remy. 

Yeah, he knows I wanna talk to him.

“I should save my hands for our car. In fact…” Now that they were out of the actual auditorium, they heard how the soft drizzle that had dampened the ground as they’d come in had developed into a pounding torrent. “I’ll go bring the car around. Save you all a dash through the rain. You enjoy,” he nodded and stepped away.

“Oh,” Pat grinned and tugged Remy’s hand closer to the arcade game. “You should have a turn. I’ll go with you, Dad!”

“Hey, Pat?” Remy touched his shoulder and met his youngest brother’s eyes. “Kristoff to Anna at the end of Olaf’s song,” he said, nodding slowly.

Pat blinked up at him, then his face bloomed in a smile. He flung both arms around him and squeezed until Remy thought he’d never breathe again. “Okay,” he laughed, then turned to Virgil and Roman. “Who’s ready to challenge the reigning champion?”

Smiling, Dad had watched their exchange, then once they were out of earshot, he bumped his shoulder. “So… what are you gonna tell me?”

“Not exactly Enigma-level encryption there, huh?” Remy laughed.

He shook his head, smiling. “Not to those of use with the power of Turingery.”

“Funny you should say that,” Remy nodded, pushing open the door. The rain poured down in buckets, but there was a dry bench off to one side under the theatre’s big awning. “Can we sit for a little while? I… I do have something to tell you.”

Dad sat down sideways on the bench, one arm leaning over the backrest and his bent leg hooked under the other, just like he used to when reading them stories on the couch. Remy wasn’t sure how much of that was on purpose, but it made him feel younger, safe.

“Not to steal Pat’s trick, but,” Dad smiled and held his hand. “‘You know you can tell me anything, right?’”

“Yeah,” Remy whispered. And suddenly, he really did know. “Dad, I…” He turned his hand over, the quartz and onyx ring bright under the theatre’s marquee lights. “Dad, this…” He squeezed his eyes shut and blurted out, “This is an engagement ring.”

Dad didn’t say anything at first, and Remy cracked open one eye. Dad’s mouth hung open, but he was smiling. “You’re… you’re getting married?” he whispered.

Remy nodded. That wasn’t what he was supposed to say first. He watched his dad’s eyes, dreading that stupid fucking Hallmark channel question, ‘So who’s the lucky girl?’

“Oh, Rem, that’s wonderful!” Dad pulled him into a hug. His voice was thick and his breath hitched like he might cry but when he pulled back, he was still smiling. “So… who’s your fiancee?” He searched his eyes and Remy’s heart clenched. He could practically see the calculations behind his gaze, his dad shuffling through each friend of his and wondering. “Have I met them?”

Then it was Remy’s jaw that dropped. ‘Them?’ Not ‘her?’

He nodded again, throat dry and all words just… gone. Dad looked closer at his ring and his smile went a little crooked. Head tilted to one side, he traced the pink and black design, then gently fluffed the streak of pink in his hair. “Is it just a coincidence that your housemate Emile has a ring that looks a lot like this one?”

Remy shook his head but didn’t take his eyes off his dad. “We’re… we’re getting married next year.”

Dad’s eyes filled with tears then, and his smile faltered, but he pulled him into another hug. “I’m so happy for you,” he whispered. “So, so happy.” He squeezed even tighter, rubbing the back of his head. He pulled back a little, still holding him, but meeting his eyes for a moment before drawing him close again. 

“And I’m so, so sorry I ever let you think you had to hide this from me, Rem.”

He pulled away and looked up at his dad. “You’re really not mad?”

“Of course not!” He smiled, teary-eyed, but really, really smiling, and ruffled the hair at the side of his head. “Is he good to you?” he asked, eyes suddenly serious.

“Yeah, Dad,” Remy grinned, a giddy hope bubbling up in his chest. “Really, really good. We take care of each other.”

“Good,” he nodded, a laugh bursting out. “I’m so, so happy for you, Rem. Thank you for telling me.”

“I’m sorry I’ve been lying for so long,” he whispered, years of secrets and fake girlfriends and Emile’s quiet, sad smile each time he introduced his boyfriend, and then his fiancee as a ‘roommate’ crashing on his head. “I love you, Dad. I wanted to tell you.” His voice cracked and he hid his face against his dad’s shoulder. “I was just scared.”

“I know, Rem. And I’m so sorry,” Dad whispered back. “I love you, too.”

“Um…” Pat’s voice suddenly carried over the sound of the rain. “Are you two okay?” Pat, Virge, and Ro stood a dozen feet away, watching them with varied expressions of concern.

“We’re okay, Pat,” Remy nodded, wiping away his tears.

Dad stood and helped him up, eyebrows raised. “Do they know?” he whispered.

“Yeah, they all know,” he nodded, another flash of guilt curdling in his stomach that his dad had been the last to know.

Instead of looking angry, Dad grinned and hugged Remy with one arm, the other held out to the rest of the group. “I’m going to have a son-in-law!” he cheered, laughing when Pat drug them all together into a big, messy hug.

-

Taglist: @crossiantgay @emoprincey

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[raynaissance]

The rebirth of "Rebirth"

The spirit of Renaissance — French word for “rebirth”, blossomed in Europe from the 14th to the 17th century. It was a testament to the incredible capability of human creativity and innovation. It was a time of flourishing art, groundbreaking scientific discovery, and renewed curiosity about the world and its antiquities.

But how, you might ask, do we embrace the 500-year-old spirit and mindset to the settings of the 21st century? Believe it or not, it is not that difficult, actually.

The pursuit of knowledge

Shakespeare once wrote, “knowledge is the wing wherewith we fly to heaven.” The Renaissance was a time of intense intellectual passion, a period where knowledge was revered and sought after. It is possibly applicable for our modern times to indulge ourselves in the thirst for learning. Delve into books, attend lectures (both online and in real life, whichever that are easily accessible to you), and never cease to question everything that you encounter in your everyday life.

Pen your mark in history

Inspired by the wordsmiths of the old, do take up the art of writing. Embark on a journey with your pen (or any choice of stationary, for that matter) and a piece of paper, just the three of you against the rest of the world (damn, how cool is that?!). Whether it’s journaling your thoughts, crafting poetry about that crush you don’t have the courage to talk to, or start working on that novel that once you dreamt about in your high school years, just let your inner artist shines. Your words will take you a long way, you just don’t know (or realize) that yet. ;)

Create and innovate

The Renaissance was an age of innovation and exploration. Seriously, they were vigorous creative thinkers and innovators back then. I mean, who on God’s green earth would think of a flying machine with a propeller system in the 15th century? Yeah, I know, it’s not the time anymore to innovate things such as helicopters or lightbulbs (yeah, no shit, Sherlock). Instead, sketch something, grab some paint and rub it on some canvas, sculpt a chunk of Play-doh or something. Whatever you do, let your imagination run wild. And I do mean WILD wild. Wild as in that 15th-century flying machine.

You’re a human, be one

Humanism was one of the cornerstones of the Renaissance spirit. They celebrated human potential, and on top of that, empathy. You know, the world is not so bad. Yes, of course, there are some ignorant spawns of satan roaming out there, for sure. Yet, you possess the power to shape the world as how you like it. Remember, society is made up of people, and people are made up of persons. Extend kindness, engage in meaningful conversations (especially with strangers), and stand up for justice, act fair even from the realms of your mind. Further note: meaningful conversations are not always about “heavy” stuff, like academic discussion or something. It includes simple gestures like asking that barista from your regular local coffee shop, “How was your day?”. Trust me, it will make them feel better, make you feel better, and it goes a long way.

=====

Built upon the best minds in the history of human civilization, the era of the Renaissance was filled with timeless insights that are still relevant as ever, even in our modern world today. It is quite an incredible opportunity for us to explore their marks in history and embark on the journey to rediscover the Renaissance spirit and embrace its essence to enhance our modern lives.

I get it, it wouldn’t be that simple. Yet, at least we know what we are trying to achieve. And even though you can only grow 0.1% each day, in a year, you will reach a growth rate of 36.5%. That’s more than a third of what you are today.

=====

I supposed that this would be your first encounter with this page. That’s okay. Readers, meet Ray. Ray, meet readers. We are no strangers anymore, are we?

I aim to explore and indulge myself in the spirit of the Renaissance, and also encourage you so that together we shall embrace the spirit for our modern lives, for the advancement of our civilization, and for an eternal pursuit of Enlightenment.

If my topics and my mission resonate with who you are, then I cordially invite you to join me on this journey. You can also find me on Instagram, where I am posting stuff about Renaissance works and inspirations.

May the spirit of the Renaissance guide your path, and may your future endeavors, whatever it is, be as timeless as the artistry of that wondrous age.

Until next time, ciao!

Ray

[letterstotommy]

Longing for easy days.

Lately I've been thinking about all the days over the past sixteen years that have gone by mostly uneventful. Days defined by a relative ease and calm, spending time together or with our extended family and friends. There have been a fair share of hard days, no doubt. But we always found more easy days.

As you've gone through high school, life was evolving in a simple, beautiful way. You've embraced many roles in your young adult era: a gifted athlete. Dedicated friend. Supportive teammate. Loving boyfriend. Curious student. Ambitious human. Perfect son.

I wish I had the wisdom I have now to appreciate the easy days more when we had them, watching you take on these new roles and enjoy the simplicity of the teenage years. I hate that it takes a cancer diagnosis to make someone deeply grateful for simpler times. These days will look different for us in the future, but I know there will be more. It's possible even today will be a lot like one of those simple days. I'll appreciate every second of it.

This experience will change all of us forever. It's a heavy thought to hold. I carry it with me at all times–my body feels heavier since we received your diagnosis on September 26. Every day I plead with someone–I'm not even sure who–to give me the cancer instead. A negative thought spiral is never too far away for me. I've felt anger, sadness, confusion, panic, all of these words failing to capture the magnitude of what's happening inside. And then I ask you how you're feeling, and the answer is often simple: there's no choice. This is happening. You have to move forward and get through it.

This simple thought is grounding for me. I can, and do, crave every detail about this disease: treatment options, the best doctors in the world, the latest research discoveries and groundbreaking treatments, cutting-edge surgical procedures, risks and probabilities... and very little puts me at ease. There is no understanding of how young adults like you get Ewings sarcoma. It's simple bad luck. There is not yet a "holy grail" treatment, to use the words of a doctor at Mayo Clinic, that will destroy the genetic fusion that causes this. You had a .0001% chance of getting this cancer, so what good is a 4-25% chance of any other possibility?

We now live in an atmosphere of unknowns, a space where I will never find the information I really seek. There is not much to find that an expert won't give me when I need it. A cruel reality for a researcher at heart, but a new world I have to find some peace living in. If it weren't for you here now, this would be a lot harder.

It's not fair to expect you to support your loved ones through this challenging time. This is your experience. And yet you are always, always quick to offer the reassuring wisdom your team needs as we struggle with the challenge you have to face. I hope you won't hesitate to demand the love and support you need in the hardest moments. I see your bravery every day, I'm in constant awe of the resilience you bring to your fight. You make it look easy, even as you face impossible decisions most adults will never have to make.

Nothing with cancer is easy. Every aspect of life changes in an instant. Your physical body is challenged, and your mental and emotional strength even more so. Navigating the world is suddenly filled with risks and dangers. You approach it all so simply: "I know. I'll be careful."

You've built the strongest foundation you could possibly have up to this point, and now it all makes sense. The hard days you endured before prepared you for your cancer battle. It will be difficult for me to ever stop wishing you didn't have to do this, even though I know that you will. You'll bring forward your calm courage to one of the greatest challenges life can offer someone, and together, we'll enjoy so many more easy days. As I write this, I recognize we are enjoying easier moments among harder ones. The conversation about cancer is often hard and heavy. The way you are navigating this right now is different. You are not a sick child to us. You are Tommy, living your wonderful life just a bit differently, enjoying all that you can, enduring the challenges as they come. I admire you even more than I did before.

[devilofthehounds]

God Eater 3 Character Novel | In the Name of the White Flower: Chapter 6

[image id: A novel cover. Hilda Henriquez from God Eater 3 stands in the foreground. In the background are profile shots of Abraham Gadolin (top left) and Werner Gadolin (bottom right). Separating the two are a pair of red armlets, streaks of dried blood overlaid on top of them. The text, when translated into English, reads, “God Eater 3 Character Novel | Chapter 5: Hilda Edition | In the Name of the White Flower”. /end id]

This is a fan translation. Original text here.

Masterpost 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

Adaptive God Eater. AGE.

With the discovery of "Adaptive Bias Factor", which could provide resistance to the ash that made up the Ashlands, God Eaters who were found to be compatible with it came to be known as AGEs.

However, compatibility could only be determined by administering both ash and adaptive bias factor into the subject's body. If the subject was incompatible, they would die.

To increase the success rate even the slightest bit, veteran God Eaters with high compatibility were selected one after another as test subjects. However, the success rate was below five percent, and many lost their lives during these aptitude tests.

Even so, for the sake of humanity.

With those words in mind, many brave heroes volunteered to take the AGE aptitude test.

Unless someone could overcome this ordeal of a second aptitude test, there would be no future for humanity.

With the sacrifice of hundreds, even thousands of precious souls, research into ash and adaptive bias factor progressed, and a procedure for the aptitude test granting a small but high chance of success was established.

And yet.

"I... lost another subordinate to the AGE aptitude test today."

The heart of one who stood atop a pile of corpses could not be saved.

Late one night, I found Werner slumped over in his room, looking as though he were a million miles away.

"The truth is, I intended to take the aptitude test before anyone else did. I thought that, by showing them the way, I could give them even a little courage... but..."

With Fenrir now effectively defunct, Gleipnir and Governor-General Gadolin had begun to exert their influence throughout Europe.

Werner, the governor-general's son, would never be allowed to put his life at such risk.

"Too many people have died... And now, even the very mention of 'AGE' strikes fear into the hearts of God Eaters. Every day, I can only watch as my comrades die one after another, my only assignment being to suppress the innocents who have begun to riot out of fear and panic... What am I even doing anymore?"

One day, your efforts will be rewarded. You will be able to once again pursue your dream.

I couldn't bring myself to give him words of encouragement. It felt as though it would diminish the weight of the lives sacrificed thus far.

Still, I wanted to help heal his broken heart, even just a little.

I wanted to tell him that no matter how cruel reality became, I would remain by his side.

Without a word, I gently embraced him.

"...I'm sorry, Hilda. I've been pretty pathetic lately, huh?"

Werner smiled weakly as he stood up.

"I've heard that the improved aptitude tests for the second generation of AGEs will begin tomorrow. Let's hope it will reduce the number of casualties, even if only a little. ...Please, rest for today."

I watched as Werner left the room, then hung my head in despair.

Werner was no longer a researcher, eyes shining with dreams. Now, he was only a God Eater, expected to fulfill his duties.

The one I had walked with, the two of us searching for the same light, was getting further and further away. I couldn't help but feel frustrated as I started to lose sight of what it meant to stand by him.

The next day.

I decided to visit Iris and the others in the residential area of the base.

But the children were nowhere to be found.

"Where did everyone...?"

It was strange. There didn't seem to be a single child within the base.

I desperately ran from place to place, searching for Iris and the others.

"Ha... Ha... Hilda!"

Soon, Werner appeared, looking as out of breath as I felt.

In his wide-open eyes, I could see confusion, as well as a faint flame of anger.

"Werner... Iris... The children... I can't find them..."

"...!"

Werner turned on his heel and ran off. Instinctively, I followed after him.

We arrived at the governor-general's office.

As soon as we entered, Werner's fiery, incensed voice roared out.

"Father, what have you done?!"

I staggered closer to Governor-General Gadolin as he silently endured his son's wrath.

"Governor-General... The children...?"

I desperately hoped I was wrong.

In my heart, I held onto that hope as I asked one single question.

"...The children of this base have been sent to take the second-generation AGE aptitude test."

The shock made me fall to my knees, as if I had been punched.

"The adaptive bias factor, as with the standard aptitude test, tends to have a higher compatibility the younger the subject is... There was no other choice."

"Don't give me that! You forced children to become God Eaters?! Why didn't you tell me?!"

Werner grabbed his father by the collar, but Governor-General Gadolin maintained his composure.

"I knew you would react like this. If I had told you, you would have tried to prevent it."

"Of course I would have! Father, how could you?!"

"For the future of humanity."

That one sentence created a decisive crack in something unseen.

The starting point of our dream.

We had envisioned a world where no one would have to say those words.

"Second-generation experiments have already begun throughout Europe. We have no choice but to place our hopes in the children."

"Father... You... Do you understand what you're saying?"

"Despise me all you like. However..."

The governor-general coolly removed Werner's hand as he stood dazed.

"This is the path we must walk."

The governor-general took his leave.

Werner's hands were braced on his father's desk. He hung his head in silence, thinking.

"There might still be time to save at least some of them..."

Carrying those words like a prayer, Werner left the room with a ghostly gait.

I was left alone in the governor-general's office, further from my dream than I had ever been.

"Ah... Aaaaah...!"

I could no longer hold back my tears.

Iris. The children. In my mind, I saw the smiles of those whose hearts had connected to mine, so vivid it bordered on cruelty.

The path we adults had chosen to walk would swallow up the lives of more children than we could ever imagine.

Stepping over the corpses of children to pursue my dream—I could never do that.

That bright dream itself was being swallowed up by the darkness of reality.

After that, I couldn't remember where I walked, or how.

"Seems like children will be taking the AGE aptitude test from now on... Honestly, I'm relieved."

The image of God Eaters saying such things and smiling together in peace was burned into my mind.

I wandered the base, drowning in despair. Eventually, I found myself sitting alone at the end of a deserted corridor, hugging my knees.

Word had it this base would soon be swallowed up by the Ashlands.

Soon, work would begin to complete the underground base, as well as the transfer of key facilities.

Our dream had finally begun to take shape.

Why was I here? Why was I so frustrated?

What had I been working toward all this time?

".........Um..."

As I dove deeper within my memories, my eyes closed to the world, it happened.

A faint voice shook me out of my daze.

"...Huh?"

I looked up. In front of me stood the purple-haired girl, her sketchbook on her back.

"You... What are you doing here?!"

Hadn't the children been forced to take the AGE aptitude test?

The girl, her expression as blank as ever, handed me a tablet she had been holding, though I couldn't even begin to fathom where she had gotten it from.

It seemed the tablet could display video footage from within the base.

You could even use it to manipulate the movement of the cameras and create blind spots.

"Don't tell me... You've been using this to hide from the researchers?"

A feat like that could only be accomplished with pure, natural talent.

In response to my question, the girl opened her sketchbook.

The picture was drawn quickly and accurately, the faces of the subjects captured clearly.

A group of researchers. Children lined up in a row, forming a wall. At one end of the line, a girl with glasses stood with her arms outstretched, protecting another girl.

"Could it be... Is this you and Iris?"

A short nod convinced me.

Iris, sensing the danger, had saved the girl from the experiment.

"It'll... be... okay... We'll... see... each... other... again..."

Pointing at Iris's image, the girl seemed to be trying to convey her will. I couldn't help but hug her tightly.

This child was the hope that Iris—and all the children—protected with every wish they had.

"That's right... Don't worry. I'll protect you..."

Trying to convince myself as well, I swore upon the hope entrusted to me by Iris.

For the child who had always dreamed of protecting her family.

No matter what, I would protect this girl.

"...What's your name?"

The girl quickly scribbled her signature in the corner of the sketchbook.

It was signed "Amy".

[lifeisastorybymaebelle]

Shattered Hearts by Maebelle Yana

CHAPTER 2

Unveiling the Truth

The next morning, Emily woke up feeling the weight of the previous night’s discovery pressing down on her chest. The messages she’d read still echoed in her mind, haunting her every thought. Calex was still asleep beside her, his breathing steady, clueless to what was brewing inside her.

Emily stared at him, her emotions a chaotic swirl of love, anger, and fear. How could he lie to me? How could he betray the trust we had spent years building? The questions circled in her mind, relentless and unforgiving. She needed answers, but she wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear them.

Calex stirred, his eyes fluttering open as he turned to face her. He smiled sleepily, reaching out to pull her close. “Good morning,” he murmured, his voice thick with sleep.

Emily forced herself to return the smile, though it felt hollow. “Morning,” she replied, her voice strained. She pulled away slightly, sitting up in bed. Her mind was already racing, trying to figure out how to bring up the topic without shattering whatever semblance of normalcy remained between them.

Calex sat up too, stretching his arms above his head. “Any plans for today? ”He asked, his tone casual, as if everything was fine, as if their marriage wasn’t hanging by a thread.

Emily hesitated, her heart pounding in her chest. She wanted to confront him and demand an explanation, but fear held her back. What if he denied it? What if he admitted to something worse? The uncertainty was suffocating.

“I thought we could talk,” she said finally, her voice trembling despite her efforts to remain calm. “There’s something I need to ask you.”

Calex’s smile faltered, and he looked at her more closely, his brows furrowing with concern. “Emily, what’s going on? You’ve been acting strange lately. Is something bothering you? ”

She swallowed hard, gathering her courage. There was no turning back now. “I saw your messages with Caroline,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I want to know what’s going on between you two.”

For a moment, there was silence—thick, heavy, and oppressive. Calex’s expression shifted—a mix of surprise and something darker—something that made Emily’s stomach twist. He looked away, his jaw tightening as he ran a hand through his hair.

“Emily,” he began, his voice strained. “It’s not what you think.”

“Then what is it? ," she demanded, her voice rising. “Because from where I’m standing, it looks like you’re having an affair.”

Calex shook his head, his hands clenching into fists. “No, it’s not an affair. I swear to you, nothing physical has happened. Caroline is just... She’s just a friend. Someone I can talk to when things get tough at work.”

Emily’s heart clenched. “And you can’t talk to me? Your wife? ”

Calex sighed, rubbing his temples as if the conversation was causing him physical pain. “It’s not that, Emily. I didn’t want to burden you with my work stress. You’ve always had so much on your plate, and I didn’t want to add to it. Caroline was just... an outlet, someone I could vent to without worrying about how it would affect you.”

His words stung, each one like a tiny blade slicing into her heart. “Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? “You’ve shut me out, Calex. You’ve been distant and secretive, and now I find out you’ve been confiding in another woman instead of me. How am I supposed to believe that nothing is going on? ”

Calex reached for her hand; his touch was warm and familiar, but it felt foreign to her now. “Emily, I love you. I would never cheat on you. I know I’ve made mistakes, and I’m sorry if I made you feel like you couldn’t trust me, but there’s nothing going on between me and Caroline. I promise.”

Emily pulled her hand away, unable to reconcile his words with the doubts that plagued her mind. She wanted to believe him—wanted desperately to hold on to the life they had built together—but the seeds of suspicion had been planted, and they were growing, twisting her thoughts into dark, suffocating knots.

“I don’t know if I can do this,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I don’t know if I can keep pretending that everything is okay when it’s not.”

Calex’s face crumpled, and he looked at her with a desperation that mirrored her own. “Please, Emily. Don’t say that. We can fix this. We can go to counseling, talk to someone—anything. Just don’t give up on us.”

Emily looked at him, searching his eyes for the truth, for some sign that what he was saying was real. But all she saw was a man who was scared—scared of losing her, scared of what he had done, scared of the future that now seemed so uncertain.

“I need some time,” she said finally, her voice firm despite the tears that threatened to spill. “I need to think about what I want and about what we’re going to do. I can’t just forgive and forget, Calex. Not this time.”

Calex nodded, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “Take all the time you need,” he said quietly. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right. I just... I don’t want to lose you.”

Emily didn’t respond. She couldn’t. The words stuck in her throat, trapped beneath the weight of her grief. She stood up, the bed feeling too small and confining. “I’m going to take a walk,” she said, needing space, needing air.

Calex didn’t stop her. He simply watched as she grabbed her jacket and slipped out of the room, his expression one of helplessness and despair. Emily walked out of the house, the cool morning air hitting her face as she stepped onto the sidewalk. She didn’t have a destination in mind; she just needed to move to clear her head.

As she walked, her thoughts raced—a chaotic jumble of love, anger, fear, and sadness. The life she had known and the marriage she had cherished were unraveling before her eyes, and she didn’t know how to stop it. The future loomed ahead, uncertain and terrifying, and for the first time in years, Emily felt completely and utterly lost.

She had always prided herself on being strong and on being able to handle anything life threw her way. But this was different. This was a betrayal of the deepest kind, one that cut to the very core of who she was. How could she ever trust Calex again? How could she ever trust herself?

As she wandered through the quiet streets of their neighborhood, Emily felt the tears she had been holding back finally spill over. She didn’t bother wiping them away. There was no one around to see her, no one to judge her for the pain that was tearing her apart.

She stopped at a small park, the swings swaying gently in the breeze. Emily sat down on one, her hands gripping the chains as she stared at the ground. She felt like a child again, lost and afraid, unsure of where to turn.

The truth was, she didn’t know if she could forgive Calex. She didn’t know if she wanted to. The trust between them had been shattered, and no matter how much she loved him, no matter how much she wanted to believe in his promises, she couldn’t ignore the cracks that had formed in their marriage.

Emily closed her eyes, letting the tears fall freely. She knew that whatever decision she made, it wouldn’t be easy. The road ahead was fraught with pain, with heartache, and with difficult choices. But she also knew that she couldn’t keep living in the shadow of betrayal. She needed to find herself again to figure out what she truly wanted, even if it meant walking away from the life she had known.

As the sun rose higher in the sky, Emily made a silent vow to herself. She would take the time she needed to heal, to think, and to make the right decision for her own happiness. And whatever that decision was, she would face it with the strength and courage she had always relied on.

For now, though, she would just sit on this swing, letting the world fall away as she tried to find some semblance of peace in the midst of the storm.

*****End of Chapter 2*****

[danbisroom]

Ep. 24 - Fantastic Chemistry Peanut Butter Jelly

Hello my beloved fellow souls,

welcome back to Danbi’s Room, your weekly dose of safe space. Go grab a cup of something warm and get yourself cosy.

I hope you had a nice week. Even if it was tiring I hope it was still enjoyable. I received continuous unplanned surprises from the past week, a lot of ideas and a couple of epiphanies.

Now, you might be wondering what’s wrong with the title. Sometimes we need to change and with every seasonal shift I’m waking up to this more and more. After a full weekend spent among full-blown street artists I’ve been feeling grounded again, along with having made brand new discoveries about my own path. The point I’m trying to make is that we need lightness, too. Lightness is part of the balance of life and it can save us, too.

I love peanut butter. My fellow Italians might burn me at the stake for stating this but I love it. And it did somehow save me, not too long ago. During the time I took a break from Danbi’s Room I was in a place of great distress and I was also super busy. The perfect ingredients to cook a quite annoying dish: I couldn’t bring myself to eat but at the same time I needed a lot of calories.

So I just bought some jars of good peanut butter.

I was having it with jam on toast basically every morning and that allowed me to function and to avoid having panic attacks for breakfast. Now I’m back to taking half an hour to make myself the perfect breakfast for the day, but now, now I can. Now I have an amount of energy that I couldn't even fathom two months ago. I did what I could and that’s self care, too. That stage was part of the process that let me get to the present moment. I feel strong even with four hours of sleep after running around a town for forty-eight during my period, with the bare minimum supply of food and under crazy weather. Definitely something that shouldn’t be routine, but if you’re not constantly in a fight-or-flight state you can occasionally dwell in these adventures and actually enjoy them despite the fatigue. The street becomes your playground, crowds are your playmates. You have fun, you savour every second of it and you even lick your fingers at the end of it. You feel the community, the harmony it created and you remember why you do it. Why do you birth art? It’s always the connection and once you got that, there’s no turning back. It’s a jam of love, laughter and fun and as you get closer you’re able to see the full picture clearer and clearer. You see that making a kid smile with your antics means much more than getting your precious paintings into elitist white cubes where nobody actually cares, not even yourself. Art is to be shared with everybody. All you need is spirit and courage, to look outside and inside, and maybe you’ll recognise something and then acknowledge that feeling of inadequacy is not yours at all, it was passed down to you like a cruel heirloom. You know, before you see and feel something you can’t really decide whether to keep it or not. But once you do you certainly can. I’m emptying my jar of that feeling of inadequacy, so that I can finally fill it with something more…you know, mine.

Then I can smear it all over my life.

Then I can deepen my breath to give oxygen to those who can’t breathe.

Then I can enhance my strength to sustain those who can’t walk.

In the pack and for the pack, always.

May we all howl together while running through the forest.

Now I’ll go make myself some matcha latte and a bit of PBJ.

Today’s song recommendation is JJAM by Stray Kids (act surprised, pretend). Well…it’s about jam and I’ll leave you to build your own interpretation of it.

I hope you enjoyed this episode and that you have a beautiful week ahead of you!

I’ll see you in the next one, big hug!

With love, yours,

Danbi

[tinarosewallingtoncoaching]

Embracing Vulnerability and Empowerment

Hey everyone, 💖

I want to take a moment to share a personal story that’s very close to my heart, in the hope that it might resonate with some of you and offer a bit of inspiration. 🙏✨

A few years ago, I found myself at a crossroads in my life. Despite having a successful career and a loving family, there was a deep sense of unfulfilment gnawing at my core. I felt stuck, like I was moving through life on autopilot, unable to break free from the limiting beliefs that were holding me back. 🌿💔

Every day, I woke up with a heavy heart, weighed down by doubts and fears. “Am I really good enough?” “Do I have what it takes to make a change?” These questions kept playing on repeat in my mind, slowly eroding my confidence and sense of self-worth. 🌧️🌀

One particularly tough day, after yet another meeting where I felt my voice was not heard, I broke down. I felt like I was failing, not just in my career, but in my personal growth. 😔💔 I remember sitting alone in my flat, tears streaming down my face, feeling utterly defeated. In that moment of vulnerability, a powerful realisation hit me: I had been neglecting the most important person in my life—me. 💫💔

I decided right then and there that I needed to make a change. I needed to reclaim my power, rebuild my confidence, and start living a life that truly resonated with my heart and soul. But where to start? 🛤️🌟

That’s when I began my journey of self-discovery and empowerment. I started with small steps, setting aside time each day to reflect on my thoughts and feelings. I discovered the magic of journaling, the power of setting clear goals, and the importance of nurturing my mind, body, and spirit. ✨📖

This journey wasn’t easy. It took a lot of courage to face my fears and doubts head-on, to challenge those limiting beliefs that had kept me in a box for so long. But with each step, I grew stronger. I started to see myself not as a victim of my circumstances, but as a powerful creator of my own destiny. 💪🌈

Through this process, I created a worksheet that became my guiding light—a tool that helped me map out my goals, track my progress, and most importantly, connect deeply with my inner self. 🌟📝 This course was like a friend who reminded me of my strengths when I felt weak and encouraged me to keep moving forward even when the path seemed unclear. 🌿💫

Today, I’m in a place where I feel empowered, confident, and deeply connected to my purpose. 🙏✨ I’m living proof that no matter how stuck or defeated you may feel, there’s always a way to reclaim your power and transform your life. 💖🌟

I created my Empowering Women course with the hope that it can help you on your own journey. Whether you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or just need a little guidance to get back on track, this course is here to support you. It’s filled with reflective questions, goal-setting exercises, and action steps to help you embrace your power and create the life you truly desire. 🌸💫

Remember, you have the strength and courage to overcome any challenge. Your journey to empowerment starts with a single step. 💖✨

With love and light, Tina 💫🌿

[spark-her-soul]

The Celebration of Singlehood: Embracing Independence and Self Discovery

Have you recently become single? Or maybe you’ve been single your whole life. It seems as though the last few months of 2023 left a lot of relationships in the dumps; myself included. I don’t know if mercury was in retrograde or if something was going around but everything did a full one-eighty. Several people from influencers online to many of my closest friends became single. Couples I thought were going to be endgame were simply ended. Like many, I found myself feeling depressed over this immensely big change in my life. My two year relationship that I had put so much energy and time into had ended just like that. I was scared to be single again. The comfort and safety of being in a relationship and knowing I had that one person to rely on was an extremely difficult thing to let go of. I convinced myself I couldn’t do it alone and I was also told by my ex that I would “be lost without him”.  However, I quickly realized that it was all bullsh*t and I was going to be just fine.

Relationships are heavily romanticized in today's society. As I ironically sit here and write this on valentines day, I can confirm that to be true. Everyone complains how they want to be in one and how they hate being lonely. However, that is the problem. All of these people are miserable being alone and constantly trying to find someone to cure their loneliness, which is the root of the issue. We need to learn to enjoy being alone so that when someone comes into our lives it is a positive addition and not a settlement to fill a void. People are so desperate to be in a relationship they are willing to settle for anything, and that is more than likely going to end poorly. We need to change our perspective and look at being single in a whole new light. You will never be satisfied with your partner if you are not satisfied with yourself. This is how we end up in toxic relationships and feel like we are stuck and can’t leave. Let’s take my past relationship for example. All of my friends were in relationships and I desperately wanted one when I met my ex. I wanted it to work so badly that I ignored all of the red flags and tried to stick through it. I ended up losing myself in the midst of things and stayed with this guy for two years. I lost sight of who I was and what my boundaries were. It turned into a situation where I was being verbally and mentally abused daily and I couldn’t even see it. Once the rose-colored glasses came off, I could finally see what I was putting up with and realized I was done. I built up the courage and broke it off. However that was just the start to my new found freedom and independence. When you are with someone who is mentally abusive for so long, they start to get inside your head. My brain needed to be rewired. I was told too many times by this person that I wasn’t good enough and that I wasn’t capable of amounting to anything on my own. Those delusions fed into my reality and I didn’t know who I was. When all was said and done, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I went from being overly controlled to getting full control of my life back, and it was scary. No one warns you about this part. They all encourage you to break up with your toxic boyfriend but then proceed to give you no guidance afterwards and assume it's the end of your problems. So when it's all over and that chapter of your life comes to an end, what do you do? The correct answer is not to get back with him. It is also not getting attached to a new guy and ignoring the healing your body and soul needs. It is to embrace being single and finding who you truly are. 

So, how do we do this? Well, I won’t sit here and tell you it’s easy because I would be lying to your face. It will take a lot of time and some days will be easier than others. The thoughts such as “should I text him” and “maybe I was a little overdramatic” will go through your head. Ignore them. In this blog, I am going to teach you how to reroute your mindset and see singlehood in a positive light. Being single is an extremely beautiful gift and something we need to learn to embrace. I digress, I’m not telling you to stay single forever. I’m not against love. I am just a supporter of self love and will always tell anyone around me that it is far more important. It is so crucial to be able to love yourself and enjoy your own company. Some ways I’ve learned to do this is by doing more things alone. There is an amazing book called “Happy Singlehood; The Rising Acceptance and Celebration of Solo Living” by Elyakim Kislev. This author helps her single readers chart ways that they can live life on their own terms and how everyone can benefit from “solo-living”. I completely agree with this author’s perspective. Solo-living is a crucial part of self-discovery. There are many small things you can do to work towards this kind of lifestyle. For example, some ways I implemented solo living were going to cafes by myself and sitting alone, going shopping by myself, going to the gym by myself, going to the beach by myself, and so on. I have found that once I realized I was capable of enjoying my own company, it was a lot easier to let go of my relationship. I started to see the beauty in my independence. I no longer had to ask for permission or plan around someone else. I was able to simply do and enjoy it. This is the time in your life where you can try new things, meet new people, and find out exactly what you want. It is time to discover YOU. There is beauty in being single, you just need to allow yourself time and serenity to see it. 

These challenges come into our lives for a reason. It is a lesson and lessons are how we grow as human beings. When you realize you are more than your partner, you will realize you are capable of more than you know. I challenge you to go out and try new things. Take that workout class you’ve been too scared to try alone. Read that book you never had time to. Reach out to your friends who probably missed your company while you were busy in a relationship. All of these are things you are more than capable of and necessary steps to learning to love being with yourself. If you take away anything in this blog, it is that relationships can not be rushed or forced. The right person will come along when you are ready. Until that time you need to prepare yourself and fall in love with your own company. That is the only way you will be able to find true happiness and self respect. Without these fundamentals, it is easy to lose track of your boundaries and dignity. Take time to yourself, love yourself, and embrace single hood for all of its ups and downs. Find peace in the silence and beauty in this new journey of self discovery.

[psychelis-new]

Hey

I've been seeing dreams of tsunami a lot past few months..I see myself struggling against the rising tides by incessantly looking for a higher ground or something to hold onto without being swept away. In a previous dream, there was an element of train at the end of finally being safe from it. In today's dream, there were signs of forecoming tsunami and we were all preparing, running around, alerting everyone else and looking for a safer ground. Today's dream ended with no advancement of the tsunami. Both these dreams had different places. Some people appeared in both dreams, while there were some new faces too. But it always ends with either meeting or a kiss with someone I am not sure of, some stranger...followed by feelings of relief and strength and safety. The people I meet, I help them and guide them and then we walk separate paths.. there isn't enough time to reflect about their newly visible absences..

Is there anything you can say about this recurrent dream theme of mine?

Hello Anon, you sent this long ago when dreams interpretations were closed and worked differently; since I didn't delete your ask, I will answer you. Hopefully it will reach you anyway and it will still serve you.

I think the tsunami dream you're mainly asking about may symbolize about a specific tough period or adversities you may had to go through or you felt overwhelmed by and feared not making it or having them sweeping you away. Like a huge change. It may have felt like you were losing control or stability, and had to go through a huge self re-discovery process to find new ground and balance. It was probably something that shook your core and maybe even your values.

The fact that you keep dreaming of preparing for tsunami probably means you need to still overcome something, especially a fear of something happening, of losing control or not being able to "survive a change". You still need to work on finding a new balance. The fact that in your dreams you noticed the same people could be something related with the relationship-field, even the fact that you need to feel like you can control and help certain people and know that they will be around you (that you can keep them safe even if this is not your main job) but ofc it doesn't have to be. It could also and more simply be that there's some kind of connection with them, or that you see them as important (if you know them) and therefore yes, maybe you still need to save them for this/feel responsible for them (even if you don't know them too well.. like you really need to be seen in a certain way maybe after a certain taruma you had to go through.. .were you judged in a certain way or had to behave in a certain way to "save yourself" from possible dangerous situations?). I think that anyway, your dream also wanted to point out that no matter the change and how unsettling it could feel, you will be safe even in the unknown (as you need to feel when things start getting shaky). Even if you let go of the control and just let things happen without stressing so much on them and trying to control them.

There's this feeling of a huge inner transformation going on inside of you and the need of closing with what has been so to let love in (even self love, as probably you need to learn to trust your own abilities and courage/strength much more... like, you can do it, no matter how hard it seems).

All the best, take care<3

[bubbleonice]

General reading for youtubers Dream and George:

Dream:

Goddess of knowledge: Start everything by applying what you already know and always tryst your intuition. All learning is simply recollection. While study is important, remember also that all you truly need to know is inside you. Put all the wonderful knowlege that you already posess to good use.

What do you desire: Be true to yourself and your desires. Dare to love what you love and not be afraid.

Step away from the crowd: you need some time alone. Dare to step away from catering others. Take time to yourself.

8 of cups: Abandonment, abandoning plans, walking away, letting go, travelling, escapism, reaching limit, self-analysis, self-discovery, introspection, looking deeper, withdrawal, disappointment, looking for the truth, loneliness, leaving a bad situation, emotional strength, courage, fatigue, weariness. It can signify walking away from people or situations in your life or abandoning your plans. It can indicate disappointment, escapism and turning your back on or leaving bad situation.

Queen of pentacles: the Queen of Pentacles suggests that it is important to you to live independently, with a stable income and with enough time and space to also nurture your loved ones. This Queen asks you to maintain a compassionate, nurturing, practical and down-to-earth attitude when dealing with others and your present circumstances. Focus on creating a calm and balanced life for yourself. Be resourceful and practical, dealing with issues as they arise using straightforward solutions that fix the problem with minimal fuss.

Expression: you are ready to manifest your thoughts and transform them into acts of love.

George:

Goddess of the unknown: a new chapter of your life is around the corner, remove fear and embrace the unknown.

Fresh Air: your body needs refreshment from oxygenated air generated by grass, trees, plants and flowers. Spend more time outside. As close to Mother Nature’s craddle as possible.

Clear the fog: life looks a bit foggy now and you’re distorting the truth. It’s time to summond the pure heart of your Spirit. First step is to clear away the confusion and take nothing personal. Listen closely, observe the details and be on guard for tendencies to interpret things from an overly emotional point of view.

Get over yourself: means to get over your false self. It’s time to become honest and to present to the world the real you. Drop the mask. Ask yourself, where am I not being authentic? Where am I acting instead of being real.

2 of pentacles: The Two of Coins, or the Two of Pentacles, is a card which, when upright, means to juggle, to struggle in a positive influence, to balance, to maintain. To keep your head up but feel like you want to jump out of your skin. It symbolizes an internal mental struggle, being unsure, not knowing your path.

9 of swords reversed: The Nine of Swords reversed generally denotes discovering light at the end of the tunnel following a period of darkness. It represents improving, letting go of negativity, releasing the tension, and learning to cope with depression, mental illness, or other challenges.

9 of pentacles: In a general context, the Nine of Pentacles is a great omen to get as it represents success, independence, confidence, freedom, security and stability. It signifies that you have worked very hard to create the success and status you are experiencing and now is the time to enjoy it. So indulge yourself, pamper yourself and enjoy the luxury and contentment your accomplishments bring you. This card also tells you that you have gained maturity and wisdom through your perseverance.

Empathy: you can easily feel and understand other’s emotions.

I hope you enjoy this reading. And please keep in mind that this is done for entertainment purposes only. I use tarotcards and oracle cards actively in my readings, as well as my intuition. Energies come and go, what is relevant for today’s reading might change in a few weeks time. But some aspects will always remain constant and the same. Thank you.❤️

[ravensgyan]

10 Best Netflix Series In 2023

In today’s fast-paced world, people are drawn to thrilling, horrifying, comedic, and mysterious movies and series that provide entertainment and relaxation. Amid their busy routines, individuals seek moments of leisure to unwind. To aid in this pursuit, we present a selection of top Best Netflix series to consider.

Netflix, a widely used streaming platform, offers a diverse range of featured movies and series. Founded by Marc Randolph and Reed Hastings, Netflix was launched on January 16, 2007.

Let’s delve into the finest Best Netflix series available:

1. Dark

Debuting on December 1, 2017, “Dark” narrates the tale of a small German town grappling with the disappearance of two children. As the search unfolds, the town’s sinister history and the intricate connections between four families come to light. This enigmatic drama unveils a complex puzzle brimming with twists and enigmatic characters, all linked to the town’s tumultuous past, even stretching back to 1986. “Dark” stands as Netflix’s first original German series.

2 Stranger Things

Among Netflix’s most celebrated series, “Stranger Things” delves into a captivating blend of 1980s science fiction and alien intrigue. The story revolves around a group of high school students from Hawkins, who, led by a girl named Eleven possessing extraordinary powers, confront supernatural forces to safeguard their town.

3. Friends

Friends, A Popular web series of Netflix. Friends series is about 6 people of friends who stay together with their ups and downs and show every path of life in a sarcastic way where you understand that at last everything come out as for better and it shows that everybody faces the same criteria of a path where everyone deal with their own ways. It is a must watch series which makes you familiar with the characters.

4. Never Have I Ever

A High School Teen Drama. Where all Gen-z are playing an important role to showcase what affection and letting go means. where change need to happen for a good reason. It is series about a girl name Devi who is an indian who has shown as how her family and friends supports her on biggest trauma and make her show for herself by appreciating that whoever she is, she is fine by her, she doesn’t need to be changed for anybody else to be accepted in their life. She should take a stand for her mistakes and make it up to it. Running is never an option for anybody. It is a courageous girl which was portrayed in a series.

5. Wednesday

“Wednesday” immerses viewers in a world of magic and intrigue. The titular character, Wednesday, embarks on a journey of investigation and discovery, showcasing her multifaceted talents. The series is reminiscent of the magic and charm found in the Harry Potter universe, captivating audiences with romance, suspense, and drama.

6. House of Secrets

This series got more fame not just in Netflix but in real life as well. It is the true story of 11 people 1 elder grand mother, 5 parents and 5 children who has done suicide because of some superstitious reason. It is the biography series of 3 episodes. In this series, It is shown that they have taken their live because they think they will rise again the next day. this is not the suicide as per them. There was a notebook where everything was written like what each person is doing right or wrong or if it is wrong then it needs to be taken care of etc. A must watch biographical series where no one missed the chance to got to know what really has happened.

7. The Witcher

The Witcher, from name you have got what characters were be played in this. In this series you get to watch the mediaeval period where there were witches, how they save the life of others and theirs. you get to watch how the small child find her way out to know what she is and there is man who helps her make her discover that she has powers that needs to be safe and controlled. it start a little confusing by portraying present and past together so they can be at align together to understand what really has happened. Must watch series.

8. Money Heist

Money Heist,” originally titled “La Casa de Papel” in Spanish, is a highly popular Spanish television series that has gained international acclaim since its debut on Netflix. The series follows a group of robbers, each using a city name as a code name, as they plan and execute meticulously orchestrated heists on the Royal Mint of Spain and later, the Bank of Spain. Led by the enigmatic and charismatic mastermind known as “The Professor” (Sergio Marquina), the group aims to print billions of euros and achieve their ultimate goal of financial freedom.

9 You

You” is a psychological thriller television series that premiered on Netflix and has gained significant popularity for its intriguing and dark narrative. The series centers around Joe Goldberg (played by Penn Badgley), a seemingly charming and intelligent bookstore manager who becomes infatuated with various women he encounters. However, Joe’s infatuation quickly transforms into an obsession, leading him to engage in increasingly disturbing and manipulative behavior to win the affection of the women he desires. “You” examines the darker aspects of modern relationships and the dangers of idealizing individuals based on curated online personas. The series raises questions about privacy, consent, and the ethical implications of technology in the digital age.

10. Lucifer

“Lucifer” is a popular television series that originally premiered on Fox and later found a new home on Netflix. The series follows Lucifer Morningstar (played by Tom Ellis), the Devil who has grown tired of his role in Hell and decides to retire to Los Angeles. He opens a lavish nightclub called Lux and indulges in the pleasures of the human world. However, his life takes an unexpected turn when he becomes involved in assisting the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) as a civilian consultant.

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