#direct vs indirect communication

[threshie]

Also, indirect communication isn't universal. Many neurodivergent people (like me) don't communicate the same, and don't pick up on hinting around, nonverbal cues like facial expressions and tone of voice, etc. Saying "I'm fine" when you aren't will result in exactly one thing when talking to me: I'll believe you.

So if you read this post and think, "Well why do I have to do the work and not my friends? If they really cared about me, they would do some of the work," consider the possibility that they are not as aware of your internal upset as you are. Or even that they may not be aware that you are upset at all.

It may seem obvious to you that you're bothered, but unless you have an actual conversation about it, some people will not be able to tell. Trust me, I'm one of them.

"No one remembered my birthday-" Well, but did YOU tell anyone it was coming up and you wanted to celebrate it with them?

"I wish someone would see through it when I tell people I'm fine-" Well, but have YOU considered not lying when people ask you how you're doing?

"I am so resentful of my friend because they keep doing this thing that really bothers me-" Well, but have YOU directly communicated that the thing is bothering you?

"I am burning out because my friend keeps expecting me to help them with serious struggles-" Well, but have YOU tried to establish the boundaries you need to feel okay?

"No one ever asks me about this thing I really care about-" Well, but have YOU brought it up yourself?

"I miss my friend but they haven't texted me-" Well, but have YOU been reaching out to them?

Sometimes people are mean, uncaring assholes, in which case you get to be mad. But sometimes you just need to communicate better. Try communication before you assume someone doesn't care!

[cosmicgendershifter]

I don't even know what you can say to the people who somehow missed that all of Ed's violence is a) anti-imperial, b) protective against direct repeated threats to himself and his loved ones, or c) self-destructive in the hopes someone will respond by killing him during his suicidal spiral. (That last example is fairly indirect and performative and comes from a place of severe nihilistic suffering.)

I don't know what you can say to the people who somehow missed that the violence is triggering and traumatic and exhausting for Ed, and that he is desperate for a chance to live differently but has also never known any other life. Stede gave him the one true glimpse he's had of something gentler! Ed didn't fully know how fucked up his life was before because that was normal to him. That's what growing up traumatized does to you.

I don't know what you can say to the people who somehow missed that the suicidal spiral is a result of Ed's circumstances: of Ed being threatened by Izzy after Izzy repeatedly found ways to force Ed back towards the violent life Ed wants so much to escape, of Ed losing his one glimpse at safety and happiness through Stede and now having to face the darkness knowing he nearly found something different, of Ed feeling like the only way he can survive in this world is by being an "unlovable" monster he hates--and then he's confronted by Izzy telling him he's still not getting it right. Of course Ed gives up then.

I don't know what you can say to the people who somehow missed the show's themes about how much harm is caused by toxic masculinity and by masking your true self and by cultures founded on trauma and self-hate and burnout. (You do see the burnout in Ed, yeah?)

I do get why some people might not understand the complexities of Ed's relationship with Izzy--how codependent and enmeshed their identities are--or the layers of symbolism that position Izzy in the story as a metaphor for traditional pirate culture and its harmful impact. (Which is particularly triggering for Ed on a daddy issues level because that's his original trauma.) If you understand those things, the unique nature of the physical harm Ed does to Izzy in this story makes even more sense.

Ed also frequently communicates through metaphor himself. Him cutting off Izzy's toes is not only a show trying to convince Izzy he's playing Blackbeard right and not only a response to Izzy repeatedly threatening Stede/continuing to threaten Ed, but also is meant to physically represent the harm that Izzy has done emotionally to Ed. Ed is communicating to Izzy the only way he knows how anymore: "See how it feels to be forced to lose parts of yourself? Stede was a part of me. My hopes of softness and joy were a part of me. You cut those off too."

There is so much evidence against the thought that Ed is some irredemable, monstrous lover of violence who will hurt Stede someday. Stede would have to repeatedly and directly threaten someone else Ed loves first (which Stede won't do), and even then, Ed would really have to fight with himself.

It's not his nature, y'all, and I'm so frustrated that some people keep insisting it is. I'm frustrated about what that says about people's ability to empathize and consider reasons for or contexts behind behaviors--particularly when the character in question is an openly queer and likely neurodivergent indigenous man. Is it so hard to have compassion and forgiveness for him? Please don't get stuck in that punitive, dehumanizing mindset.

Redemption is so important, which is why I appreciate that Izzy gets a growth arc once he stops centering his entire identity on the Blackbeard persona and clinging to toxic masculinity. (Seeing Stede's impact, how different things could be, vs. the harm caused by the traditional ways, changes Izzy too!) Izzy's time, as a side character and mentor figure and piracy metaphor, does end, but first he gets to live with more meaning and unlearn many of the negative behaviors. That's the goal, right? To move forward.

[socoolinmypajamas]

Rayashki and Zeno: How a harsh environment shapes actions.

Sometimes, a perception is taken as a principle. A "cruel reality" can be described as a negative perception of the material world, used to assert a situation. "Reality is cruel", however consists in using the previously descrived perception as a fundamental truth or a proposition in which to base the foundations of a system of belief, of behaviour or of a chain of reason. Both are heavily present in Farewell Rayashki, a story all about the strenght of the colective, the indomitable human spirit in the face of adversity and what shapes the actions of those who persue a goal. With that in mind, I wanted to write... Not an analysis per se, but rather to build some sort of structure or perspective (whatever you want to call it) through which the story can be analyzed.

Now, imagine a matrix diagram where the X-axis goes from "Gemeinschaft" (Community) to "Gesellschaft" (Society), two terms taken from german sociologist, Ferdinand Tönnies, and the Y-axis goes from "Deontic" to "Epistemic" in a mix between a Gretchen McCulloch's linguistic sense and a Józef Maria Bocheński's philosophical sense. If everything I just said made no sense, don't worry. Here's a (very) rough explanation of what I'll mean with these two dichotomies through this post: X-axis: A classification of societal ties. "Gemeinschaft" refers to personal, direct interactions with emotional relationships (such as families or small towns like Rayashki) formed by people who strive to archive the goals of a collective. "Gesellschaft", on the other hand, is about indirect and formal interactions, with more rational relationships (like a company or an institution like Zeno) in which everyone band together to persue personal goals in common. Y-axis: A classification of actions as both modality (McCulloh) and authority (Bochenski). Roughly: "actions based on interpretations and beliefs done by someone with an authority based on their ammount of knowledge and experience" (Epistemic)" vs "actions based on rules and/or desires done by someone with a role or position that gives them the power to enforce them" (Deontic).

Upper-left: Gemeinschaft/Epistemic

Windsong's quest, mostly percieved as a fool's errand, is a classic underdog story. The lone reasercher who, disheartened by the lack of support from all the important academic institutions and societies, finds in the small town of Rayashki a more hospitable enviroment to persue her goals. She creats emotional conections with the community and soon finds more self-fulfilment in helping the townfolk than in other things like taking Zeno's offer or abandoning her studies, which are presented as more beneficial options from a rational point of view.

She confronts the notion of "cruel reality" and rejects "Reality is Cruel" as a principle. This action comes from what she knows (her study of ley lines) and beliefs (the people of Rayashki, the usefullness of her field of research).

Bottom-Left: Gesellschaft/Epistemic

You'll think he should be at the opposite side of Windsong BUT Bertolt, as the classical evil guy in your everyday underdog story, actually rejects the notion of "cruel reality", and accepts "Reality is Cruel" as a principle. His emotional detachment from the people of Rayashki, their values, and even their very same idea of community, comes from his role as a member of Zeno, an institution that exemplfies the impersonal and formal relationships of the Gesellschaft. He doesn't see himself as the evil corporate guy who's there to destroy their dream for a greedy goal, but as the savior who comes to provide the light of rationality to this uncultured rural people who are willing to risk their lives for the sake of primitive traditions and values. He defines himself as a "simple representative of Zeno, bound by their rules and orders, working tirelessly to help people in a world wreaked by The Storm", a description that allows him to minimize his negative perception of the reality of others while justifying operating under the principle of Reality is Cruel.

Bottom-Right: Gesellschaft/Deontic

Evgeni is shown through the story as a leader of Rayashki who deeply cares about his community BUT is willing to destroy it for the sake of a rational goal: protecting the lives of the townfolk.

He embraces the notion of "cruel reality", and accepts "Reality is Cruel" as a principle.

But how is HE in the opposite side of Windsong, instead of Bertolt? In Tönnies dichotomy of Gesellschaft and Gemeinschaft, the relationships that are meant to keep people in communities and societies can also push them out: is all about wether the social ties become too tight or too lose to help us find self-fulfilment in them. Windsong found in a community what she couldn't find in society (validation and encouragment for her study of ley lines), while Evgeni thought he found in a society what he couldn't find in his community (a positive prospective for the people of Rayashki).

Upper-Right: Gemeinschaft/Deontic

While Bertolt is a man of the world, trying to expand the benefits of globalization by placing the needs of bigger groups above those of the little ones, what Vila is persuing isn't just a goal to archive, but a dream to share. She didn't became a part of Rayashki only to build an utopia: everyone living there were already doing that and Vila found meaning in developing strong emotional ties with everyone as they strive together to work hard for Rayashki.

However, unlike Windsong, she accepts the notion of "cruel reality", even if she doesn't agree with "Reality is Cruel" as a principle. This one si a bit tricky to explain.

It all comes down to their experiences while chasing their dreams and how that shaped their understanding of what a dream is.

For Vila, is something that kept her going. A cherished wish that inspired her to leave the rusalki and search for a new home. A goal she could share with the people of Rayashki. A hope to cling unto while she nourishes the sprouts of Rayashki while they are passengers of the ship called "St Pavlov's Foundation" while adrift in the vast sea of the outside world, so they can carry on the spirit of Rayashki. She accepts the "cruel reality" as something that could hinder her dreams, force her to adapt them, but never crush them.

For Windsong, the dream was but a promise turned into a burden. It was not something that comforted her if held tight, but rather something it pained her to let go. Accepting the "cruel reality" meant letting something die, and for someone who was struggling in all fronts, it meant taking a toll way to big for her to handle.

As the last ley line hunter, the dream is but a gamble turned into an investment. The chance of failure is there no matter what. Only thing she can do, is to work hard to reduce it as much as possible. To her, a "cruel reality" is something that crushes dreams. Is not enough to reject the use of this perception as a principle: her own experiences taught her that the perception itself can be a cancer. She might have a tendency to put herself down, to have doubts on what she does and to even be "realistic" in any situation she encounters. But there's ALWAYS a part of her fighting her perception of reality from turning into a negative one even if she lacks the proper arguments or mental state to do it effectively. Vila noticed that from day one, and began to slowly share with her the tools Windsong lacked, helping her become a more confident and capable person, while inadvertibly gaining a trusty partner to rely on.

Their experiences shaped them into people who complement each other incredibly well. Leaning into each other, they'll plant their seeds of hope into a new generation. For the study of ley lines; for Rayashki; for those who live in a world affected by The Storm; for those who'll survive it. *** To anyone who'll read this... whatever the hell it was till the end, thank you for time! Feel free ask me anything, correct me, chew this to bits with your bare teeth, whatever you like. I just haphazardly wrote it because I love this game so much.

[lakesbian]

💝 for Rachel (for the ask meme)

💝 A headcanon about their love language

yeah these are def just shaping up to be analysis of canon vs. headcanons for most of 'em because we already have interesting canon answers for a lot of these questions but that's ok because that's fun too. this is gonna be a bit messy bc i'm real tired but anyway:

the long and short of it is that she's a dog. she loves like a dog. and i love how that behavior interacts w/ the specific way taylor is fucked up. it is So meaningful and compelling. taylor is for the most part absolutely incapable of admitting or even noticing when something has hurt her, let alone reaching out for support. she's very similar to brian in the sense that people verbally acknowledging that she's upset (generally synonymous with 'weak' in her mind) is intolerable to her, because ignoring and repressing that emotion is critical to her ability to force herself to stay standing & push herself thru the agony to achieve what she wants to achieve. there's this moment during the echidna fight where she sees wards verbally checking in w/ each other and she thinks that she's glad that her team would never ask if she's okay because she wouldn't be able to stop from breaking down if they did.

and the thing abt rachel's love language is that she's Direct About Everything All Of The Time Forever because she doesn't know how not to be. but it's not in a "asking if someone is okay" way, because even that is a level of indirectness, of giving someone the option to say "yes" and reject comfort! she instead directly notices when taylor isn't okay, and moves straight to offering comfort without forcing taylor to experience the weakness of admitting that she needs it. she's not great with words--she frequently feels frustrated by not knowing how to communicate what she wants to communicate--so instead she shows love through simple, blatant acts of physical affection, devotion, and trust. she's the equivalent of a big ole dog that just silently huffs and climbs into your lap when you're sad, and you can't do a damn thing about it because you're getting cuddled now and that's just how it is. she doesn't force taylor to acknowledge the situation to her, she simply notices when taylor needs a hand to hold and very firmly grabs taylor's hand. she's silently, unobtrusively understanding. she sees things as they are, and responds not with social niceties, but with firm and direct kindness. if you start crying while she's sitting next to you, she won't make a big deal out of it, she'll just keep sitting next to you. and that's exactly what taylor needs--affection and comfort sans expectations for her to have any sort of coherent explanation or conduct.

the devotion & trust is also Sooo. auugh. ough. when taylor turns herself into the PRT and she's unquestionably faithful that taylor has a plan, regards everyone else like they're idiots for having even the slightest sliver of doubt in her. during gold morning, when she willingly steps into taylor's field of control, saying that taylor is smart & to let her do what she needs to do. there's this moment during the behemoth fight that i think a lot about where rachel says "you have a plan" in response to taylor, y'know, having a plan, and taylor sort of confusedly reads it as smug & then satisfied without really grasping why. and the reason why is that rachel has put up with so much social bullshit she doesn't understand--the way the undersiders interact w/ her, coil, the prt--and taylor, without fail, has made things make sense. she's the only undersider to successfully speak to rachel on terms she fully understands, the one to kill coil, the one who soundly trounces the heroes every time. whenever things are confusing or scary or nonsensical, taylor, smart and strong taylor, fixes them with her plans. the earth is cracking and coming apart around them, because There's A Fucking Kaiju, but it's okay, because taylor is there, and rachel knows taylor will always make sure things turn out alright. genuinely doglike levels of unquestionable devotion, where there are ways she understands taylor more intimately than anyone else on the planet, and there are ways she can never understand taylor, but she still unquestionably trusts her enough to place her life in her hands. taylor even remarks that rachel trusts her too much when she steps into her radius during gold morning--and the reason that rachel trusts her too much is because she trusts like a dog trusts their person. i've seen ppl say that taylor is rachel's dog, but no, rachel is 100% taylor's dog. she loves that girl like a dog would. it rocks. autism forever.

[prettyboykatsuki]

if its not too tmi, the guide to making your girl cum might still be useful 😭 my gf and i are both in our first relationship and any help would be welcome

i have so many asks fdjslk?? abt this. like no bullshit at all maybe fifteen. but sure 👍🏾 note i am no sex expert or really anyone u should listen to but you know. i get okay reviews

first things first - the most important thing is learning to communicate with your partner. ik u have heard that many times but every body is different and if you can take instructions well, making someone cum is much easier. like. people say it all the time for good reason but just focus on listening more than anything else

also im using woman / she + her but this advice applies to any afab people who are not currently talking T👍🏾 testosterone changes some stuff so i'd give diff advice on some parts abt touching n stuff

learning how to take an apply what ur told is truly like 99% of the game

for women in particularly - u should probably carve out a chunk of time. most women need at least 15 minutes if it's with a partner (often more) and if it's your first time tg it's good to take each other apart and get comfortable

also somewhat obvious but you absolutely cannot forgo foreplay. truly cannot be overstated but u can't. lol

if share the same parts, u are already at somewhat of an advantage as you have some ideas on where to touch etc. neck and chest are always safe bets, and so is inner thigh etc. deep kissing is always also a safe bet. don't overthink it too much, just do your best to communicate both appreciation and attraction

foreplay also starts before getting naked being genuine. undressing someone or showing sensual affection is your friend. ik this sounds corny but its very genuine advice lol

a lot of foreplay is both to build arousal but also getting someone out of their head. a lot of women in particular tend to get really hung up on various aspects of the process. if you can effectively get them out of that mindspace, you're already on your own way

sometimes dirty talk is good and dirty talk does not need to be crass - making sensual small talk can go a long way. praising how she looks or feels, showing your enthusiasm by telling you're looking forward to making her feel good.

thank you is also always safe in that process. thank you for letting me touch you, thank you for trusting me to make you feel good etc. and if you're not feeling confident - it does the same job as something more dirty lol

here is some more specific stuff 👍🏾

a lot of getting 2 know someone sexually is figuring out various sensitivities and pressure. generally speaking, women tend to lean one way or the other when it comes to pressure on different areas of the body for foreplay.

(usually of course, there is some mix of both - but at least in my experience there is more general lean one way vs another)

some people prefer softer touches and caressing and some people prefer more deep pressure and groping. always start on on the soft end and move towards the other slowly.

YOU WILL WANT TO LEARN INDIRECT VS DIRECT PLEASURE. ON YOUR PARTNER AND WHAT THEY PREFER !!!

some parts of a womans body are too sensitive to be touched directly, and they may highly prefer indirect contact as their choice of pleasure. if a womans clit is too sensitive, you might want to stimulate the area just around or underneath instead of directly touching their clit. use their clitoral hood as a buffer essentially.

the clit itself firms up but it's an entire area inside of your body. and what's exposed is just one nerve. its why touching or rubbing the sides can still make effective foreplay because internally the clit has a whole body etc

the hardest part about clitoral stimulation is reading reactions. but the clit will respond to pleasure physically most of the time. try things deliberately, and time your tongue or fingers in a way that lets you gauge their reaction

if someone is feeling good - you'll usually get a very faint throb. you have to look for it to notice it sometimes, but the intensity of that throbbing is what will tell you. clits are similar to dicks in that way

same thing goes for nipples usually. plenty of people like it being touched or sucked directly (again it is all abt sensitivity and pressure) - but it's common for the area to be too sensitive.

touching around, through / over the fabric of their top (this works better with non-silky materials / stuff with no slip), and underneath can also do the job. if the nipples are sensitive to the point of being unpleasurable - the swell underneath the boobs is often a good place to show affection. u can try running your fingers underneath to cup and squeeze instead. or just

the no slip thing is because rougher fabric give nice friction. being touched through cotton feels different from silk. its more hit or miss in my experience

im going to break down the advice about actual fucking into three parts so bear with me .

the most important thing for ALL of this is fucking consistency. listen to me im being so serious. when you hit a rhythm do not stop. ESPECIALLY if she tells you not too.

oral: this one is tricky because there's truly not a universally good way of eating pussy. it's like... four of the above skills wrapped in one skill. so even if i wanted to school you in i don't think i could lol

my best advice is to remember the above about pressure and sensitive and start slow. stimulate the surrounding areas with your tongue, do a lot of teasing. if she's too embarrassed to tell you things verbally, this will usually push her to showing you at least. if she bucks up against you that's a good sign to give a little more pressure.

building pressure is important here. she will feel pretty much every part of your tongue, so make sure you are careful and listen to what she says or does. when you find the rhythm to lick, it's normally safe to suck on her clit (from light pressure to deeper pressure like before)

you will know when you're hitting the right everything because it will start to pulse in your mouth and she will squirm more. when you're there, stay there and don't move unless you're going to die. learn to breathe through your nose lol

FOR PENETRATION THERE IS TWO THINGS. and most time you will still want to pair with clit stimulation but rmb 2 ask.

fingering: the vagina is one of those things that is very hit or miss. with fingering in particular. for most women, it feels better to have another person do it. and it's best combined with clitoral stimulation so it can often be a two-handed affair or used as a sidepiece to oral.

the most pleasure will be felt around the actual opening and against the gspot. the opening has a lot more sensitive which is why the thrusting motion feels good. the g-spot can also feel good, but keep in mind that a gspot orgasm is internal and can feel especially intense. so just be prepared for what reaction you might get and maybe getting pee-d on. or squirted on. or both.

finding the g-spot isn't complicated, it will feel a little textured and have a little more give. with enough arousal it will also be swollen and easier to find.. you will hear a lot about the come hither motion, but what you're actually doing is rubbing along the upper walls.

again, everyone is different but honestly - i've had good luck combining a thrusting motion with the rubbing motion. use your wrist to move so you don't get tired. you can pick what fingers to use but middle and pointer is go to, so you can angle your palm against their clit (in the instance you are just using your hands).

FOR SEX TOY PENETRATION:

dildos: if i tried to explain how the strap works we would simply be here all day, so i will be talking about the dildo as a separate appendage used with your hands and not as part of a strap-on. strap sex is too much of a science lmao

almost all of the time - using a dildo is trying to create the same stimulation as above with gspot pressure, but that's not the only way. there are several angles and those angles hit different things, so it's worth experimenting with this. but for internal orgasm and using dildos - you want to understand comfort and friction.

lube is your friend, but too much slip can make it feel like nothing so build up the lube slowly. some resistance can feel pleasurable and is often ideal. with dildo, you also want to keep in mind the rigidity and maybe buy a toy together. a dildo can be too hard or too soft depending on what it's made with

internal orgasms rely a lot on muscle tension and angling, as well as pace. everyone is different and there is once again no universal way but your best bet is a rhythmic, pushing up motion. if you're using a dildo on your partner, i recommend put a pillow underneath their spine for easier angling.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, REMEMBER ALL ORGASMS ARE TENSION RELEASE.

you need to build tension to release it and keep tension to cum. the need for steadiness and rhythm comes from that. if you're wanting to make someone orgasm, some physical tension can really help - so asking your partner to grab your hair and hold onto your wrist can be helpful. giving their muscles something to flex and hold can redirect focus and help with intimacy so let her pull your hair or dig her nails in your back or grab your wrist. it will actually get u closer to the orgasm

remember most of all though to have fun and feel good together. sex isn't a performance, it's a mutual act of pleasure. too much pressure will kill your boner. good luck 🫡

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: INTP here. I have read through your blog and it has helped me a lot on reflecting myself and resolving my past issues. I do have one concern that I hope you can address. I tend to realize I mindread a lot as per your blog description (I’ve read through the entire tag), and am actively trying to prevent judging and assuming people’s intention too early/quickly.

However, I cannot tell the difference sometimes between when I understand a person well, vs when I mindread. I want to try to understand people so I can interact with them better. I also have past experiences with being misunderstood before and want to try to give everyone a chance. I believe this is due to inferior Fe issues along with my ego thinking that I am kind. I also want to believe that I understand people, because I can tell if someone is a red flag but maybe that does not have to do with understanding people.

I came up with some solutions such as paying attention and communicating to other people to clear up misunderstandings, but even then people tend to be indirect in what they say and it turns out they are hurt by what I said or secretly angry at me for a while (I did not realize this until they are actually angry at me).

From writing this, I do notice my contradiction: how would people be hurt/angry at me if I “supposedly” treat them right? I admit that I am wrong for doing so, that I have hurt them, and I hope to address my ego in order to be better as a person for myself and other people around me.

I mindread because I am afraid of people potencially being angry/hurt because of me, even when that did not happen, because my social skills are not that well developed, but I acknowledge there might be more underlying reasons to this that I am not fully aware of.

I noticed that you have great perpection skills when understanding people, and I would like to learn the positive aspects. If possible, can you help shine a light on how I should start? Plus, if you can advise me why why people are indirect when communicating that would be great because I am almost always direct in my communication and do not fully understand the nuances of social context, and I wish to understand and treat other people better

--------------------

Socializing and communication are complex topics, so there's a lot to unpack in your question.

(1) Mindreading: Ne development should help with the mindreading problem. Healthy Ti doms have a reputation for being sharp and adaptable because i) dominant Ti only accepts factual information and rises to the challenge of systematizing it for effective judgment/decisions, and ii) the auxiliary function actively monitors and processes any and all changes in factual information.

But when functions remain underdeveloped, Ti-Si always gets stuck working with a very limited and unchanging set of facts, and Ne-Fe is too small in scope to alert you to other possible ways of looking at situations, ways that might get you closer to the truth.

In other words, healthy INTPs always leave room for error. They proceed through life confidently based on the facts they have on hand but always with the awareness that knowledge is provisional and might need to be updated at a later date. They never believe that they know everything, they always keep themselves open to more information, and they take the extra step to gather information that might contradict or disprove what they already know.

However, being P, the tendency to "prospect" for information can go awry when Ne is unhealthy enough to give rise to Ti-Si loop. The above healthy qualities I just listed can easily turn negative and express hidden ego issues, e.g., by making you feel insecure in not knowing, anxious about getting blindsided, and obsessive-compulsive in needing to know more (due to having no clear goal, unrealistic goals, or constantly moving the goalposts).

Contrasting healthy and unhealthy Ne expression, what is the lesson? If you hope to be a healthy INTP, you have to learn how to sit comfortably in ambiguity and uncertainty. If you hope to be a mature INTP, you have to love a challenge and go the extra mile to welcome and embrace ambiguity and uncertainty as vehicles for learning and growing into a more intelligent person.

(2) Theory of Mind: How does the above apply to social life? Relationships are full of ambiguity and uncertainty, are they not? Sure, in theory, solving relationship problems should be a simple matter of good communication and clearing up misunderstandings.

However, in reality, good communication is very hard to come by. Why? Because… people. Human psychology is messy AF. People contain multitudes, and in some cases, multitudes of contradictions. They often don't know themselves well enough to know what they really need/want/like, let alone communicate these things clearly to another person.

What's worse, what people think they know about themselves can sometimes be false, which leads them in all sorts of wrong directions. You brought up a good example of thinking that you are a kind person, yet you keep getting feedback to indicate that you aren't as kind as you believe. Human perception can be very flawed, so how you see yourself and others can get very distorted. This raises the question of how to navigate the messiness.

The first step is to see and accept people as what they really are (Ti). Humans are complicated. They are not programmed or programmable machines. They can want contradictory things. They can change their mind on a whim. They can say one thing and do another. They can believe wholeheartedly in complete falsehoods. They are capable of reprehensible acts. They can also be resilient, steadfast, honest, loyal, noble, passionate, inspired, innovative, determined, dedicated, empathetic, loving, and altruistic. If humans weren't so complicated, social life would be terribly boring.

If you really want to understand people better, you have to exercise better imagination (Ne) and recognize the full scope of their potential, both positive and negative. When you have a very full view of humans, you'll be quicker to recognize the truth of each individual. But when you have a very small and limited view of humans, you'll find yourself constantly confused or blindsided by their behavior.

Some of this fuller view simply comes with life experience, but the majority of it should come from making an effort to expose yourself to different kinds of people and creating opportunities to expand your understanding of human nature.

(3) Ego Development: What does this mean for improving your social skills? Firstly, on your part, you have to see and acknowledge your own complexity. One reason I emphasize the importance of self-awareness is that, without it, you'll never come to see or appreciate your own complexity.

The way you view yourself at age 20 will be very different than age 40. It's not necessarily because you've changed a whole lot in that time, in fact, most people don't change very much throughout life, objectively speaking. What really happens is that you gradually learn more and more about who you really are over time, and that changes your self-perception.

When you're young, ego development is still in early stages, which means the ego is still in a fragile state. As you build a personal identity, you get heavily invested in seeing yourself a certain way, and it can hurt the ego when that self-image gets contradicted. This leads people to become defensive of their self-image and avoid situations that disturb it.

What they have yet to realize is that taking down the false self-image is precisely how one gets closer to knowing the truth of oneself. One must surrender to the pain of that takedown in order to grow. Are you willing to surrender to the pain of realizing that you are not the person you've always believed yourself to be, that you're possibly a much worse person than you thought?

Until you can recognize the truth of your own complex humanity and the full scope of your own positive and negative potential, you will always struggle to understand others, because it is likely that you will remain stuck in a state of projection. Projection means that your perception of others is always tainted by your own unconscious ego issues, i.e., you don't see the world as it is but as you are.

For example, you are a person who prefers to communicate directly, and this unconsciously sets up an expectation that others should do it too or be capable of doing it. Whenever others prove to be very different from you, you get confused or flustered. Your mind isn't open enough to gather the whole truth about people when your first instinct is to assume people are or should be just like you.

Secondly, on the part of the relationship, you have to acknowledge the reality that, at this moment, not everyone is within your capability to understand and is therefore not going to be very compatible with you. There's a reason why we seem to click with some people better than others. While relationships do require work to maintain, there's a certain point at which the expenditure of effort starts to bring diminishing returns. At that point, it might be time to throw in the towel and admit that the relationship isn't going to work in its current manifestation.

For example, if you're looking for someone who is capable of having a mature, honest, and authentic discussion about relationship issues, then you have to weed out the people who haven't yet developed that capability. It's not about being mean or critical; it's about recognizing the facts of what someone can or can't do and making a smart choice about whether it's possible to have a healthy relationship with them.

(4) Exercising Good Judgment: Making evaluations of people and relationships isn't easy because there are a variety of factors to take into consideration. One problem Ti doms often run into is that they don't take enough factors into consideration (inferior Fe), i.e., they are too undiscerning and often just passively take whatever relationships come their way.

When you approach relationships too abstractly or intellectually or flexibly, you can easily fall into the trap of thinking that any relationship can work in theory, if only you did this or they did that. In reality though, the effort it would take to implement those changes wouldn't be worth it due to diminishing returns, or those changes are simply infeasible (and you might slowly destroy yourself or the relationship by trying to force the change).

An important step in acknowledging your own complex humanity is to admit that you have needs, preferences, and desires... AND be okay with them changing over time, as you learn more about yourself. Needs, preferences, and desires should be informing you of what kind of person is best suited to being your friend or partner.

There are billions of people in this world. If you want a positive, enriching, and fulfilling social life, you have to be proactive and selective in finding the right people for you to keep company with. There are only a few basic criteria that need to be present in every relationship, such as: kindness, trust, empathy, etc. But what about the other qualities of the person? What does your ideal friend/partner look like?

(5) Navigating Conflict: An important aspect of having good social skills is accepting the fact that conflict is necessary for relationships to grow over time. A relationship without disagreements and problems isn't a real relationship. The question is whether the two people involved are: i) committed enough to the relationship to make things better, ii) equipped with the relationship skills required to resolve problems properly, and iii) on the same page and want the same things out of the relationship.

To the first point, not everyone you meet will be as committed as you, so you have to use your best judgment about whether it's worthwhile to continue with them. Also, reflect on how committed you are to a relationship and whether it is accurately reflected in your everyday behavior. Remember that Fe is an extraverted function that requires taking action and cannot only be about empty words or silent intentions.

To the second point, as long as both individuals are willing to learn and improve their relationship skills, there will continue to be hope for the relationship to get better. Although, keep in mind that the learning process isn't always linear and smooth. There will inevitably be steps forwards and backwards.

To the third point, you can discuss with people what they want out of the relationship, what their goals are, or what they hope the relationship can become in the future. A relationship has a greater chance of success when there is agreement about which direction to go. If people refuse such discussions or don't take them seriously, then it casts serious doubt over their commitment, which circles back to the first point.

It sounds like you are motivated to improve your social skills. If people aren't being honest with you, you have to get to the bottom of why. Perhaps the problem lies mainly in you not really hearing what people need from you because you keep failing to address the feelings they are communicating, which is a common communication problem. If that's the case, you need to work on your listening skills and communication skills in general. Perhaps the problem lies mainly in the other person not being able to express themselves honestly for whatever reason. Or it could be a combination of the two.

The best you can do is welcome people to be honest with you, by guaranteeing to them that you can handle the truth and encouraging them to speak directly. However, you have no control over whether they can do it. It's their issue to deal with and there's no forcing it.

[herdsworldbuilding]

City Grime.

so world building a city.

It’s a complicated subject, involving things of how the city came to be, who made it and why? Where is it located and why is it located there? A city trends to thrive on trade or defense. Where dose the city get it’s food and water and where dose it’s waste go? Who holds the power, who are its people? what shapes it’s streets? Is it planed down or did it grow naturally over time? These are all good things to ask about world building a city… but that’s not what this is about.

I’m here to ask about some small scale things you can ask yourself about these cites. 

Specifically about Graffiti

- what is graffiti in the city like?  cities have a lot of graffiti, sometimes its small, sometimes its rare, in some places graffiti mainly takes the form of writing. in other places in the form of drawings.

Is graffiti big and bold or is it small and intimate? Is it both? Is it generally found out in the air or indoors? Graffiti out in allies and on walls vs the small stuff you find in bathroom stalls, school desks and on benches.

what sort of writing is favored? is it short phrases, “like Gorgeio was here.”  is it Tags (small words or names written on objects to claim something in some sort of competition, used by individuals or groups, to show territory or just to show off by getting them in the oddest places.) or perhaps graffiti is away to spread news about something, a bit like how graffiti in Pompeii was used. is grafiety used as markers and cyphers for people in the know?

Do people use graffiti to communicate in an indirect manner?

Think phone numbers written on toilet doors.

Is graffiti used as a more direct form of communication? Such as hobo signs that where used to tell eachother where it was safe to rest, or perhaps thieves guilds to quietly signal to eachother where a target or safe house is. Or perhaps it’s used by magic users for instructions or tests or pointing out the local supernatural hot spot. or wandering cultures telling eachother stories and warnings about the city they are passing through or even as sighn posts that only they can read. Like trail trees.

street art.

stickers, posters, and flyers.

Sometimes more physical things like a wall of gum, flags, shoes hung up places, necklaces strung up high where no one can easily reach them or locks chained to bridges.

I have even heard of small constructions; like fairy or mouse doors and little statues glued to trash cans or in cracks in the wall.

It can be a drawing and paintings or even something more physical like scraps of cloth tide to poles, yarn woven around trees or stickers slapped onto trashcans and signs.

In one place I have lived most graffiti is in the form of spray painted tags on everything and stickers. While in another place tags are rare as the buildings are painted with murals and art and trees with knitting tied around the branches. In another place most of the buildings where wood so graffiti was carved into it.

What kind of things are often drawn? What imagery do people use?

Graffiti will look different depending on what era of history it is, but it will still be around. It might be smaller in earlier time periods.

Is all the graffiti in this city you are building visual? Perhaps some of it is auditory, like wind chimes in a park, or poles carved to whistle as the wind blows through it, or perhaps it invokes a sense of smell or touch? Is the graffiti only able to be sensed or seen by the magical?

-what dose your city smell like? Do different districts in the city have different smells?

-what dose your city sound like? Is it mostly quiet humming of conversation and rustling of leaves, is it car horns and loud construction, is it water lapping on brigades and electricity buzzing through wires. Is it street musicians and local bird? Are some areas of the city different in sound pollution and how dose that contribute to graffiti?

Dose a certain kind of graffiti have a certain kind of well known meaning? Like initials carved into a tree surrounded by a heart, meaning romantic or sensual love.

- is there a code of conduct for graffiti? 

note that I am far from an expert in graffiti, I know like shiltz about it. im simply going off my observations.

I know that there is a loose hierarchy of tags.

If you can’t outdo it don’t tag over it, and if it is a memorial then do not tag over it. These guidelines are not enforced in the same way everywhere, but breaking them will get the other people that tag to come after your tags with a vengeance.

Or at least that’s what I have heard…

Another guideline that might exist is what can and cannot be tagged.

Street signs, utility walls, underpasses, abandoned buildings, train cars are free game.

While things like windows, cars and residential homes are often off limits (though I have seen plenty of exceptions to this too)

Trees and natural rocks seem to me a hit of miss on if they are in limits or off limits. - how dose the city deal with graffiti? 

Do they paint over it? Wash it away? Leave it to be.

Is it the city or private residents who deal with it? Dose the city even think it worth dealing with or do they let it alone?

Are there certain things that get graffiti more than other thing? Such as benches, utility boxes, lampposts, under bridges or one specific wall.

Dose the city do something to prevent this graffiti such as have anti graffiti seats in tram and rail carts.

If a city doesn’t have graffiti why is that? Are punishments so harsh that no one dares or are things allowed elsewhere so no one bothers or is it covered up as soon as it’s thrown up?

Dose the city install public works of art? And if so for what purpose? Public art is usually political in some form or another, be it from a statue to commemorate some historical event or another statue to be an ego bust to a certain people in political power or as a pice to try appease one group or another. It can also be used to hide things that the city dose not want it’s citizens paying attention too. Either in a benign way such as hiding vents or utility wires from view or more malicious things like Anti-vagrancy architecture hidden as “art”.

Dose the city encourage certain kinds of graffiti in certain places. Think street art vs graffiti Tags. Or the before mention news walls in Pompeii.

Is some graffiti seen as vulgar while other kinds of graffiti are tolerable or even encouraged?

What is the legal punishment for graffiti, if any?

Is some graffiti seasonal? Such as graffiti that occurs during certain festivals. For example beads caught in things after Mardi Gras or toilet paper during Halloween.

Do cities see vandalism in the same light as graffiti or are they viewed in a different way?

Is morality ascribed to graffiti? Is it seen as a symbol the degradation of civilization or is it just an active that is seen as fun? Is it something in between?

- how dose the graffiti interact with the citizens?

Is graffiti used in political messaging? Who in your world or city tends to use it that way?

Dose graffiti contain hate speech? Are there other groups who go around covering up the other groups messaging?

What groups tend to make what certain graffiti and who is the other group that tries to cover it up? Is it a gang? A secret society? A political activist group? A cult? Or just a group of petty artist trying to one up each-other?

Dose advertisement interact with graffiti? In example posters that advertise an event or painted art and words on a cross walk advertising a local concert.

Do people steal posters or graffiti when they can? Are there collectors of graffiti or is it seen as only something vulgar?

For example Alphonse mucha the most recognizable artist in the art nouveau movement did a lot of work in advertising. The main form his advertisement took was posters. I have heard that these posters where stollen at such a high rate it was difficult to actually get the advertisement out… though that may have been for an other artist. I also know some people who steal advertisement posters.

Are there any famous graffiti artists or is it an anonymous work for fear of harsh legal action.

How much attention do the average person walking the street notice the graffiti or pay attention too it?

Is there a specific pice or tag that everyone in the city knows about or is especially well known for one reason or another. Like wings painted on a city wall.

Is there a certain graffiti that is found in multiple cities or even travels to multiple countries.

In example; Kilroy was here, a small pice of ww2 graffiti that is still making its was across the world.

(I will not be confirming or denying if I have added to the collections of world wide Kilroys)

Is there graffiti that a person from one city in your setting wouldn’t recognize as graffiti if they traveled to another city?

Are there certain areas of the city that has more graffiti than others? Is there a city district know for its murals or a famous ally or street. Or something seen as a curiosity like the island of dolls in Mexico City.

Is there a certain group of people in your world known for a specific type of graffiti? If so why do they make this graffiti?

Is there religious graffiti? Either invoking or dameing one group or another?

Is religious motifs used in graffiti?

Is there graffiti involving superstitions?

For example (blue) bottles hung up in order to trap spirits, copper coins wedged into wood to ward against good luck. Pices of paper tacked to walls or posts with the wishes of the citizens.

What about public memorials? Do people make small plaques or remembrance? Do people create make-shift shrines? Have candle lit vigils? Or paint a mural? Do different communities in the city grive different ways?

How do the different cultures of your world, especially those living in any given city influences the kinds of graffiti found there? Do the patterns and styles of art change depending on what culture is more dominant in any given area of the city?

What kind of vibe dose the cities graffiti give? Is it chill and relaxed? Is it rebellious and provocative? Is it artistic and hopefully? Is it desperate and territorial? Hostile and hateful? Helpful and fun? Dose the over all vide of the graffiti change from one city district to another or is the city rather harmonious in its cloterr?

After all a sticker for a favored sports team slapped on a sighn post has a very different vibe from a sigh post littered with bullet holes.

-is there magical graffiti?

If you have a magic system, would people use it to make graffiti? Would there be something unique about graffiti made using the magic system?

Is there enchanted graffiti that changes and moves? Graffiti that looks different for everyone who sees it? Paintings of laughing women, chalk fish that swim on sidewalks or tags that translate themselves into many languages?

Can graffiti be organic in nature? Living pods and biological bits used as gag inducing decoration or bones hung up carved in runes? Sculpture made of feathers and fur.

Are magic users used to get rid of graffiti? Or are they the ones who make the most graffiti?

Is it used as protective wards? As a way to put a curse on someone?

And so much more!

As I mentioned I am no expert in graffiti, I don’t even know a lot about it.

But I hope I could at least make you consider about thinking of the very small details of your world, the slight and insignificant.

[qnewsau]

Trans woman excluded from female-only app wins court case

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/trans-woman-roxanne-tickle-excluded-from-female-only-app-wins-court-case/

Trans woman excluded from female-only app wins court case

New South Wales transgender woman Roxanne Tickle has won a discrimination case against female-only social media app Giggle for Girls after the app’s founder kicked her off the platform.

In September 2021, Giggle founder Sall Grover (above right) removed Tickle from the app based on her uploaded application photo. Tickle sued, alleging discrimination against her on the basis of her gender identity.

On Friday, Roxanne Tickle (left) prevailed in her case, Tickle vs Giggle, receiving $10,000 compensation in the Federal Court of Australia.

Justice Robert Bromwich rejected the claim Tickle had been directly discriminated against, due to a lack of evidence Grover knew Tickle was trans.

However, the judge ruled Tickle had suffered indirect discrimination when Grover removed her after seeing Roxanne Tickle’s photo and she “considered her to be male.”

“The indirect discrimination case succeeded because Ms Tickle was excluded from the Giggle app because she did not look sufficiently female according to the respondents,” Justice Robert Bromwich said.

Australia’s Sex Discrimination Act makes it unlawful to discriminate on the basis of a person’s sexual orientation, gender identity or intersex status.

‘Distressing and hurtful public statements’

Giggle’s lawyer Bridie Nolan argued Roxanne Tickle was a man so excluding her from the app was lawful.

Tickle’s lawyer Georgina Costello KC said that “Ms Tickle is a woman” even as “the respondents flatly deny that fact”.

Roxanne Tickle sought damages and aggravated damages amounting to $200,000. She told the court this was because Sall Grover had persistently misgendered her in interviews and hundreds of online posts.

“Grover’s public statements about me and this case have been distressing, demoralising, embarrassing, draining and hurtful,” Tickle told the court.

“This has led to individuals posting hateful comments towards me online and indirectly inciting others to do the same.”

Sall Grover told the court that she would never address Tickle using female pronouns and under no circumstances would acknowledge her gender identity.

The Federal Court ordered Giggle to pay Roxanne Tickle $10,000 in compensation, as well as Tickle’s legal costs.

Sall Grover has previously said that she would appeal the court’s decision.

‘Unlawful to treat transgender women differently’

Paula Gerber, Human Rights Law Professor at Monash University, said the Tickle vs Giggle ruling was a huge victory for transgender women.

Gerber explained Roxanne Tickle was excluded from the app after Sall Grover “looked at the photo Tickle had uploaded with her application, and reached the visual conclusion that she was a man.”

“The Court found that there had been indirect discrimination, not direct discrimination because there was insufficient evidence to prove that Sall Grover knew that Roxanne Tickle was transgender,” she said.

Paula Gerber said this case is the first time a court has tested the gender identity discrimination provisions in the Sex Discrimination Act since they were added in 2013.

“This case sends a clear message to all Australians that it is unlawful to treat transgender women differently from cisgender women,” she said.

“It is not lawful to make decisions about whether a person is a woman based on how feminine they appear.”

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

The worse people I know have been posing this lately. I felt bad reading it and couldn't quite figure out what I was experiencing or why I hated it. I thought maybe I was having a bitch eating crackers moment. But people I like posted this occasionally too so it wasn't that.

I finally realized what was making me so angry about this.

(It was mainly being posted by neurotypicals or people who maybe are neurodivergent but who DO understand and utilize social cues fairly naturally.)

I spent a long time and a hell of a lot of effort learning to communicate via these social cues. I learned the neurotypical language and learned to communicate the way the people around me prefer to be communicated with. Indirectly with weird hints. They prefer that, they love that, so I learned to communicate that way the same way I learned what all my cat's different chirps mean. What my dog wants when she barks vs huffs at me. I developed the skill of utilizing social cues in a painstaking process FOR THEM.

I learned a skill that was incredibly difficult and painful for me to do for their comfort and only for their comfort. I catered my entire personality to what made them comfortable in the hope that they would stop disrespecting me.

And now they're saying actually I prefer you to communicate directly, something you have stifled within yourself for my comfort. AND I will breach your boundaries that I know you are trying to set because you refuse to communicate them in the way I now deem acceptable.

And this kind of thing from these people (who are assholes) makes it seem like when I miss social cues and behave inappropriately as a result I am being an asshole and ignoring their boundaries and social cues on purpose simply to be a contrarian.

I am constantly anxious and over-analyzing social cues. It consumes so much of my mental energy and shapes my behavior in social situations and now people are proudly sharing that they get to disrespect me and ignore my boundaries because I am utilizing an indirect, culturally-appropriate communication style I learned for the purpose of being abused less because they have now decided that direct communication is better, actually.

No disrespect to the original posters. I just kinda hate this.

[sean-parnell]

How Manufacturers Can Leverage Content Marketing to Grow

Cold calls, print advertising, tradeshow participation, and knocking on doors once worked well manufacturers can no longer rely on them to generate leads that fuel sustainable, double-digit growth despite having an effective sales team that may still have some skills in these areas.

Inbound lead generation in commercial and industrial markets requires compelling brand storytelling and thought leadership that educates prospects along the buyer’s journey, who don’t want to talk with salespeople before they’re good and ready as they fear being “sold to” by people that don’t have their best interest in mind.

Problems Solved vs. Products & Services, Features & Benefits

Powerfully resonating with prospects requires brand storytelling that converts website visitors into prospects then into customers.

Your brand story begins with having a deep understanding of the problems faced by your prospects, what they need to overcome them, and the value to them in doing so before promoting all of your products and services and their features and benefits. Prospects are searching for who can solve their problems and may have a limited understanding of what will solve their problems, so claiming your solutions are “the best” and that you’re an “industry leader” may mean nothing until they have an understanding of how your products will help them.

The hero of your prospects’ story is themselves, so you need to educate them on how you can solve their problems, and how your people, process, products, and services – not just products – do so. This is what will resonate powerfully with them. In this way, you serve as a guide for achieving success and avoiding failure. Your products and services with their features and benefits are how you solve these problems..

Thus, your “brand story” needs to be told throughout all of your marketing: on your home and about pages, blogs, guides, case studies, marketing collateral, presentations, proposals, press releases, third-party website profiles, direct mail, email campaigns, your tagline, and anywhere else you promote your company.

A brand story for each product and service you sell can also be developed as each of them solves different problems in different ways for different markets. This “sub-brand storytelling” is also effective for different vertical and geographic markets as each has different requirements.

Extracting & Promoting Thought Leadership

When they have a problem that they want to solve – because the pain of not changing exceeds the pain of the change – prospects self-educate themselves by researching the internet before speaking with any vendors, so it’s important to provide educational content that will help them understand how you can solve their problems:

TOFU: Top of Funnel: this content builds awareness by providing an overview of the problems you solve and how your products solve them

MOFU: Middle Funnel: this content goes one level deeper and helps them consider between different options that can solve their problem

BOFU: Bottom Funnel: this content gets very specific and helps prospects make their final decisions

OOFU: Out of Funnel: this content is created in a misguided attempt to maximize keyword rankings and website traffic as part of a flawed search engine optimization strategy (SEO) but fails to generate leads though can be quite costly

Tip: it’s important to have a good balance of all types of content (except OOFU).

It’s especially important for manufacturers to understand that, in addition to learning about how you solve their problems with your products and services, your prospects want to know how your solutions and business practices compare with both direct and indirect competitors. They also want to understand how their investment can be cost-justified so they can sell the idea of buying from you to internal decision makers that may not be in communication with you. Product comparisons are very useful because this is what prospects try to compile themselves, especially if they include areas where your competitors have an advantage over yours. Case studies that include return on investment (ROI) estimates are also highly useful for prospects.

Lead-Generating Content Begins with Keyword Research

Understanding and prioritizing what your prospects are searching for is a critical first step for lead generation, which begins with conducting keyword research on all the different terms your prospects may use.

Onsite SEO then fully leverages the content you’ve already developed when you work the highest priority keyword phrases into your page titles, meta descriptions, H1 headers, and throughout the content of each page – just remember it has to read well and should only be performed by someone that thoroughly understands your business and what prospects value.

Brainstorming content ideas that incorporate these keyword phrases and educates prospects along the buyer’s journey is the next step, following by prioritizing these content ideas into an editorial calendar. The best content comes from getting a professional copywriter to interview your company’s thought leaders and then writing up what is learned in the form of foundational website content, blogs and guides.

Best Practice: Google Search Console reports the keywords people searched for to find you.

Creating Lead Magnets

When your prospects discover that you are providing education and thought leadership for how you can solve their problems, many will be willing to provide their contact information to download this gated content – especially long-form, MOFU and BOFU content including guides, whitepapers, ebooks, and webinars. It’s also important that your contact forms ask prospects where they found out about you so you can attribute each download to the marketing or other activities that generated them. It’s not recommend to gate promotional material that prospects expect to be freely available, including blogs, brochures, data sheets, infographics, case studies, and similar materials.

Promoting MOFU and BOFU also generate even more website traffic and leads, including in Google Ads, LinkedIn Campaigns, Microsoft Ads and other pay-per-click (PPC) campaigns, your social media profiles (especially LinkedIn and Twitter), on third-party article publishing sites (e.g. Medium), and throughout your public relations activities.

The Manufacturing Content Creation & Lead Generation Process

Here are the steps for creating content that has been proven to generate leads and product sales from many commercial and industrial manufacturers:

Conduct keyword research and optimize all of your current content for search

Develop brand storytelling and implement it throughout your home and about pages, marketing collateral, presentations, and all other marketing materials

Write blogs and publish them on a consistent schedule, educating prospects on a wide variety of topics that help them understand how your products and services will solve their problems

Syndicate unique versions of this content on high ranking, third-party websites

Launch Google ads and email campaigns to bring more prospects in

Create microsites to promote how you solve specific problems in your top vertical markets

Launch ecommerce to supplement sales through your channel partners for people that want to speak with and buy directly from you – just don’t undercut them, so selling only at list price is recommended

Evaluate new market opportunities where your current competitors are irrelevant with Blue Ocean Strategy

This approach routinely generates sustainable, double-digit sales growth with an ROI of over 300% within 12-18 months when executed by an experienced industrial marketing agency – and your company will no longer be a well-kept secret in your markets.

The Case for a Marketing Audit

While it may be appealing to hire a full-time content marketer, SEO specialist, or to outsource to a manufacturing marketing agency that may wow you with shiny objects, conducting deep dive marketing due diligence with an experience marketing consulting resource understands your industry is typically a better way to start.

An effective marketing audit will identify what it will take for you to generate sustainable, double-digit growth by leveraging brand storytelling, content marketing, SEO, content syndication, email campaigns, marketing automation, social media, advertising, PR, and more.

Most marketing audits focus only on promotional marketing communications, so you may want to find an industrial marketing agency that can auditing the other three Ps of your marketing: products and services, pricing and placement (selling through channels and go-to-market strategy).

[pikahlua]

Given how indirect communication especially around emotions is a norm in Japanese culture, it seems like Himiko’s openness when it come to her love is another form of othering. With Ochako and Himiko contrasted by their willingness or even ability to openly express their romantic feelings, what do you think Horikoshi is trying to say about how people express love or perhaps about indirect vs direct communication in general?

I don't really know what Horikoshi was going for, but the effect for me was three-fold:

It reframes what I imagine is a well-known issue that has lost its meaning to many people into something new and surprising, which helps people examine the old issue in a new light. "Yeah yeah, sure sure. It's good to express yourself. Suppressing self-expression hurts people. We shouldn't do that," becomes "People expressing themselves actually can make you uncomfortable, and we all need to reflect on how we respond to that discomfort because of the consequences it can have. We're creating our own problems."

Ochako's admiration of Himiko for being able to express herself so openly is presented in a positive light. Ochako is meant to be a stand-in for any readers who feel like they have to repress themselves to be accepted. She provides acknowledgement for those who yearn to be free to be themselves without being rejected by everyone.

Man, I know I can't be the only autistic person who relates sooooo hard to what Toga went through as a child.

[miiishcambion]

There’s a lot of debate right now regarding “neurotypical communication vs neurodivergent communication” and which communication behaviors are associated with each type, if one is better than the other etc, and it reminds me of a concept I learned in grad school regarding the ‘context’ level of communication styles. To summarize:

Basically, communication styles exist in a spectrum: from very ‘high context’ styles that require a high level of cultural context and mutual understanding to work properly, allll the way over to the very ‘low context’ styles, where communication is very upfront with little to no cultural context needed for it to be understood.

High context is usually indirect with a lot of subtext, with a focus on “politeness” and the avoidance of “rudeness.” It varies widely depending on the culture it exists in, and two people from different high-context communication styles may very well struggle to communicate at all.

Low context is usually direct and straightforward. You aren’t expecting the listener to know a bunch of additional norms in order to do over your meaning- your meaning is clear in your words. For people not used to high context communication, it can come across as abrasive or rude.

A lot of what you see people describe as “neurotypical communication” is high-context communication, and a lot of what people describe as “neurodivergent communication” is actually low-context communication. That’s not to say that one neurotype can’t gravitate towards one more on average (I do actually think there is a basis to draw a connection between neurodivergence and a preference for low-context communication, for example)- but it is to say that someone’s communication style cannot, on its own, determine their neurotype.

There are pros and cons to both high and low context communication, and a communication style is often deeply entrenched in the culture that develops it- to the point that challenging it can be very difficult and even upsetting. The way we communicate has emotional and social importance to us, and when other people question it, it can make us defensive.

At the end of the day, though, I think people often use neurodivergent/neurotypical to describe things that are not exclusive to those groups, and I think that artificially shuts down discussion in a way that isn’t helpful. Turning the conversation into a debate around whose inherent, unchangeable brain type is better is just not productive.

Being able to isolate the communication style itself in order to dissect it is a much better use of our time, imo- because while neurotypes don’t change, communication and behavior can, and sometimes it needs to.

(I might add to this later to explain it a bit more in detail and get into what sorts of cultures tend to have what sorts of communication and what situations they tend to work best in, but I’ll leave it here for now.)

[veliseraptor]

thinking about the uptick in stuff about direct vs. indirect communication on this webbed site lately and how I feel like I often see an equation made where indirect = bad because it's "less clear" and I think about, like.

I very much grew up in an indirect communication/"guess" household, in a big way, and at this point I'm very aware (in a way I wasn't) that not everybody did and many people are deeply confused by the way that I learned to communicate (or not), and I'm still working on believing that people making a direct request of me does not in fact mean that I've missed six indirect ones and now they're very upset because that's the only reason somebody would do that rather than coming at it sideways.

my brain immediately starts screaming "ahhhhhh it must be a really big deal if it's coming at me head on because that's the only reason somebody wouldn't communicate through three layers of obfuscation and disclaimer"

also, conversely, working on the thing where asking for something from somebody is not in fact being a demanding problem soon to be abandoned for being too much of a burden, but is actually just. sometimes a good way to get what I need.

anyway. I think I'm just very aware in some particular ways of how the way I learned to interact with other human beings was/is deeply skewed by the expectations of the house I grew up in. love my parents dearly but the way that they were prone to panic a little when I started crying was not necessarily conducive to healthy expressions of emotion. thank god for livejournal, conduit for 80% of my bad feelings in middle and high school

idk. I don't actually have a point here, I think I just sort of want to...shine a bit of a light on how it feels to be on the receiving end of more direct communication when that's not the language you speak, and that it's not just "neurotypical people are trying to confuse people by not just saying what they mean."

spits feelings onto blog, hits post

[ellieellieoxenfree]

9, 26, 34

9. Thoughts on cliffhangers.

cliffhangers go in the box on the high shelf that not everyone can access. they need to be used sparingly, and they need to be used responsibly. they are VERY easy to make into a cheap gimmick that either a) relies entirely on the shock value or b) wears out its welcome immediately, but can be effective in the right hands.

i generally don't try to go TOO crazy with cliffhangers in my writing, mostly bc i'm slow as hell and nothing would irritate me more as a reader than to get a cliffhanger and then be sitting on my hands for six months waiting for a dipshit author to get around to writing the resolution. but i'm not opposed to them as a light sprinkling in one's writing. i just don't trust a lot of people to handle them well, and i usually include myself in that equation.

26. What would you describe as OOC?

like 95% of fic i have read lmao. that's mean as hell but i'm very very picky about what i like to read. i tend to get really salty about pet names -- i promise you most of the characters you write calling each other 'baby' Would Not Say That. i also think that people tend to let characterization go out the window when they write porn, and they let their own personal kinks speak first and characters speak a distant second.

dialogue is a big one. i think there's a way to deliberately stylize your writing so that it takes on a theatrical/outsized bent, and so it sidesteps the criticism of not sounding how people actually talk, which is one of my favorite things to both write and read. i love the heightened artificiality of certain exchanges -- a writer who can master that may not necessarily be hewing 100% to canon, but is playing with the characters and twisting them around in a way that is so incredibly satisfying to read.

on the other hand, there are a lot of instances that do the same thing -- writing Not How People Actually Talk -- but it's much more amateurish/clumsy. it doesn't flow or have a natural cadence that suggests the author is secure in their own voice. everyone can write, technically, in the sense that anyone is capable of opening up a notes app or google docs and putting words down, but not everyone knows their own voice. the dialogue becomes very utilitarian and often doesn't shift for different characters' personalities. things like vocabulary, including profanity or the lack thereof, sentence structure/length (eg, does the person ramble, or are they more succinct and to the point?), direct vs indirect communication styles, all contribute massively to a character's personality, and it really takes me out of a story when everyone uses the same interchangeable author-insert drone of a voice in their dialogue.

also, since i am a very trauma-heavy writer, people who ignore canonical traumas tend to irritate the ever-loving shit out of me. a character in a past fandom was shot, and many writers chose to ignore the entirety of their recovery or take any consideration into how this would affect their lives going forward. i understand not wanting to make that a central focus of the story -- writing it's hard work! -- but to just completely erase a major part of the narrative is SUCH a peeve of mine. if a character is broken, then for fuck's sake actually factor it in!! just because canon brushed it off doesn't mean that realistically, this wouldn't have consequences for the person, whether physically, mentally, emotionally, or all three. i love fluff, but i love broken characters more, and when i get the fluffy happy stories, i want weight to them. i want them to feel earned. and i KNOW that's probably unfair of me to people who just want to fuck around in the sandbox for a few hours, but it's such a disservice when i see my faves who are 95% trauma and 5% person be reduced to cheerful giddy stereotypes with no depth whatsoever.

34. Do you write to improve? Or is that not a concern for you?

i definitely do worry a lot about stagnating in my writing or doubling down on bad habits that hold me back. (i am horrible with telling rather than showing, for example, and my sentence structure tends to give me more gray hairs than i already have because it's so goddamn static.) i try to let go of some of that when i'm writing fic because it's a hobby and writing anything and finishing it generally is such a fucking win for me. with how shit-ass garbage for real the publishing world is, i've really lost so much of the drive to go pro, and the thing i feel like has the best chance of ever getting written wouldn't be fiction anyway -- that's a whole different ballgame.

but i do think about trying to sharpen my skills when i set out to write a new piece, yes. i always put a lot of thought, and often way too much thought, into how i want a story to turn out and what i'm trying to achieve with it. i have one i'm working on right now where i'm trying to ensure my parallels actually line up in a way that's going to be emotionally resonant. yeah, it's just a dumb hobby where i move little fictional dudes around and make them be sadder than what canon allowed them to be, but it's also a deeply rewarding and cathartic dumb little hobby. writing can be a purge of your own feelings -- which sometimes works, if you don't overpower a character with your own inner narrative, but sometimes definitely comes off as Oh, You're Going Through It, Huh? -- and a way to foster connection/understanding with people who are struggling to feel seen or understood. and telling stories does engage a certain part of the brain that likes to gnaw on new challenges and figure out ways to stretch itself and inhabit all these different characters who aren't necessarily a 1:1 projection of myself. i like to play around with voice or perspective and not get tied down to one way of telling stories (although i'm not egotistical enough to say i'm even close to succeeding at this; i'm honestly very pedestrian and uncreative when it comes down to the finished product). i'm always looking for a way to take the big, beautiful ideas in my head and actually turn them into stories that live up to the original idealized image i had. do i get there? almost never. but the fight continues.

[goldenlaurelleaveswrites]

FanFic Ask Game: E (Referring to Juleka vs. the Forces of the Universe), H & X

Thanks for the ask, Nonny!

Ask me about my writing.

E: If you wrote a sequel to Juleka vs. the Forces of the Universe, what would it be about?

I would love to tell you what a sequel (if I wrote one) would be about for J vs, but unfortunately, I can't without spoiling the last two chapters of the story. I'm hoping you won't have to wait too long to find out what happens, and if you still want to know what a sequel would be about if I were to write one, you're more than welcome to ask once the rest of the story is up! 💖💖💖

H: How would you describe your style?

Can I say wordy? 😂 I do try to use different stylistic elements in my writing depending on the story; my style when writing Chords & Courtship is very different from J vs. I would say that consistently, I use quite a bit of descriptive language for both the narration and dialogue. I also play around quite a bit with sentence structure and length to create different rhythms and effects, and I like to play around with indirect and direct communication.

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

I mean, I don't really enjoy making any of the characters I write for suffer, with the exception of the kind of suffering Luka endures when Jules is teasing him 😂 I do love making Jules tease Luka (to be fair, he makes it so easy 😂).

If we're going with angsty, actual suffering and not lighthearted suffering, I don't really like making my characters suffer 😂 I live in Fort Fluff for a reason. But I will do it when the story needs it (plus it makes the fluff all the sweeter by contrast)

[oakedredwine]

Master List

Requests are open: I thought it'd be really funny if people made requests like they were ordering from a drive thru, but you don't have too.

(Ex. I'd like a MHA Hawks HC with a number 4- Long, and extra fluff.

I mostly write Gender Neutral and Male aligned readers because there are plenty of Fem aligned posts, but I'm not opposed to writing feminine readers.

!! Please request specific pronouns. Otherwise, the MC will use they/them !!

== If it makes you, as a reader, more comfortable, I'm totally okay with writing an MC described as AFAB or AMAB with any pronoun (she/he/they/zir) if you prefer

~Remember! You don't have to be LGBTQIA+ to request, I'm just creating the most inclusive page I can :)

Idea Board:

"Chicken" - Party game

7 minutes in heaven - Party Game

Truth or dare - Party game

Sick day (reader)

Sick day (partner)

Over protective (reader)

Over protective (partner)

Baking together

Cuddling on a rainy day

Comfort after a nightmare (receiving)

Comfort after a nightmare (giving)

Reallt Tall Reader

Really Short Reader

Enemies to lovers

Red String (or soulmates)

Childhood Sweethearts

Forbidden Love

A Second Chance

Love Triangle (✨️oooh scandalous✨️)

Opposites Attract

Stuck together

Ditched by friends at ___ event

"Just friends"

Pen pals

Wedding Runaway

Sunny vs Grumpy

Oblivious to love

Can't spit it out/ say how they feel (reader)

Can't spit it out/ say how they feel (partner)

Road Trip

Isekai'd (reader)

Isekai'd (partner)

Fake Dating

Hold My Drink

Roommates

One Night Stand

-- You can also request your own --

^I'll add more based on popular requests^

Type:

Headcannon

Oneshot

Length:

Short

Medium

Long

Add-ons:

Some fluff

Some angst

Some smut

Some spice

Extra fluff

Extra angst

Extra smut

Extra spice

(Spice: Make out or sexual themes, not the deed)

Fandoms:

Anime

Attack on Titain

Demon Slayer

Jujutsu Kaisen

Blue Period

Death Note

Black Butler

The Seven Deadly Sins

Hunter x Hunter

Naruto

Soul Eater

Komi Can't Communicate

(Definitely more, just can't think of em)

Games

Stardew Valley

Life is Strange

Other

Arcane

Creepypasta

♡What I will write♡

LGBTQIA+

Slight blood/gore

Angst

Song fics (only if I'm in the mood, though)

Smut

Most kinks (includes BDSM)

**I'm open to more, so just DM or ask me, and I'll see what I can do**

!!What I will not write!!

Transphobia/Homophobia/Queerphobia

Psychosis episodes

Body shaming/abelism

Slurs

Suicide/self harm/anything of that nature

Rape/Non-consentual sex

Smut of characters younger than 18 y/o,

Incest (direct or indirect), piss, scat, puke, mutilation, or dismemberment kinks

Side note:: I will always put 18+ warnings on smut, and TWs when necessary ♡