#difficulty in family situations and divorce

[merrysithmas]

i see a lot of people speculate that john lennon had bipolar disorder but i dont think this is true (i think this is maybe the unclinical laymen viewpoint) but i think he definitely had borderline personality disorder instead

[starmosaics]

Mars in the 8th House pt. 2/3

If you haven’t read the 1st part here’s a link to the original post :)

Today I’m focusing on transformation, life and death situations and possible struggles with mental health and substance abuse.

Those with Mars in the 8H frequently face unforeseen events in their life which catalyzes incredible changes. Some of these events are catastrophic. These people can completely alter their lives by brute will or they will be met with challenges which push them towards making necessary changes.

Common events I’ve seen/experienced that pushes an 8H Mars towards transformation:

-Death of a loved one, loss of any kind

-Near death experiences

-A breakup/divorce

-Overcoming addiction

-Releasing/healing trauma

-Inheritance

There’s many times where these people feel isolated and left in the dark; some may feel like they’ve lost everything even their sense of self. Many 8H Mars individuals have experienced and been exposed to very difficult and painful events which is one of the most challenging aspects of this placement. Life has its ups and downs and for these people, that’s never ending. The most important thing is that they are so persevering and are quite determined to follow through to reach the other end after facing difficulties. I’ve seen people with this aspect go through hell and eventually got out of that dark place and became a totally different person; shedding one’s skin. I myself feel like I have already lived 10 different lives. The 8th House forcefully causes one to experience changes within their mental state, physical bodies, or spiritual lives; the 8th House can quite literally strip your identity causing you to have to completely build yourself up again.

These people may feel like they got the short end of the stick when it comes to certain situations that they've been dealt leading them to succumbing to their fears and experiencing chaos and disheveledness leaving them feeling trapped, but something to remind these folks is that when they feel like they’ve hit rock bottom, the closer they are to transforming themselves or an area of their lives along with gaining grit and profound wisdom. The 8th House wants you to go inwards, identify the parts of yourself or your life you can't face, to take the reins and evolve. Sometimes it requires metaphorically (sometimes literally, but hopefully not) dying first to become reborn.

T/W: Abuse, substance use, heavy topics mentioned!!

In terms of an 8H Mars’ mental health, there’s quite a distinctive pattern. As we’ve established earlier that what kind of experiences these people might face, the events that alters one's life naturally will heavily impact one's mental health. I know 4 other people with this placement (along with myself) who have some form of psychiatric disorder; most commonly Bipolar disorder, Paranoia, MDD (major depressive disorder), and BPD. Many have experienced events (commonly during childhood, teen years, and early twenties) that lead to signs/a diagnosis of CPTSD (complex post traumatic stress disorder).

Substance abuse is also very common to those who have this placement. Either a family member of theirs struggled with it, or they themselves did. Everyone I know who has this placement including myself has either had a family member who struggled with addiction, or have personally struggled with addiction; sometimes both. 8th house represents something you inherit and unfortunately sometimes it's the inter-generational cycle of addiction. Substance use disorders and mental disorders are sometimes heritable. This isn't meant to scare you or make you feel bad if you have faced any battles with substances. Addiction doesn't have to be your whole life story, just a chapter. Those who I know who previously struggled with addiction and turned their lives around are happier than ever.

Here are some famous people with an 8H Mars that struggled with their mental health and substance abuse:

-Marilyn Monroe (Alleged Bipolar disorder, substance use disorder)

-Robin Williams (MDD, substance use disorder)

-Amanda Bynes (Bipolar disorder, abused stimulants)

-Sid Vicious (Showed signs of personality disorder, substance use disorder)

-Drew Barrymore (Substance use disorder, MDD)

-Courtney Love (Substance use disorder, Autism)

-Lil Peep (Bipolar disorder, substance use disorder)

-Anthony Bourdain (MDD, substance abuse)

More than half of these famous people also struggled in childhood due to the impact of their family members; Marilyn Monroe had a traumatizing childhood and was living in multiple foster homes and orphanages due to her alcoholic and schizophrenic mother being unable to care for her, Amanda Bynes facing sexual abuse by Dan Schneider as a child, Sid Vicious' mother was neglectful and gave him hero*n when he was a teenager, Drew Barrymore had a mother who influenced and fueled Drew's coca*ne and alcohol addiction before she was even 15 years old, and Courtney Love's father was deemed to be unstable and a horrible father. He allegedly gave her LSD as a child and also physically abused her when she was 17 after visiting him in Ireland.

I don't want to fully air this story out, but I had a friend who was like a sibling to me and their dad abandoned them during their teenage years and their mother was unable to work due to her schizophrenia and substance abuse; she would have us pick up cigarettes and get drugs for her when we were 16/17. This friend has experienced a lot of pain and is still struggling with their own demons and mental health and i'm no longer in their life due to their choices and influence on me, but I still think about them all the time. I wish them the best and hope they eventually find their way back to themselves. They're one of the smartest people I've ever met.

In my own personal life, my dad was never in the picture and my mother (who I believe also had an 8H Mars) struggled with mental illness and substance abuse, so I lived with my grandmother, who I eventually found out also abused substances, but was more "stable". After my mom passed literally from alcohol deteriorating her body when I was 17, I decided I had to keep distance from my family and moved out as soon as I could and since then my life has totally changed. I heavily smoked weed from the ages 16-19, I'm addicted to cigarettes, I am very wary about my alcohol consumption, and I inherited my mom and grandmother's mental illness. If it weren't for my upbringing, I wouldn't possess the wisdom I have today. Yes my childhood was fked up, but it made me immensely resilient. I have experienced life and death literally and metaphorically many many times.

I'm not saying that if you have this placement you're bound to struggle with addiction and have a tragic life story filled with trauma and pain, but unfortunately a more common thing I see in those who do have this placement have struggled with trauma, substances, abuse, and family dynamics. And like I said with the transformational aspect of the 8th House, many people overcame their demons and traumas. There's always an option for recovery in any scenario which is also associated with the 8H, and sometimes destruction (Mars) and chaos is needed for rebirth. In a less extreme manner, 8th House Martians may just struggle with generalized depression and anxiety.

Another thing I've noticed about those with an 8H Mars placement is that they let their anger seethe until it eventually boils over leading to an outburst. They may experience super intense meltdowns due to not healthily coping. Emotional regulation might be difficult for these natives in general.

On one end Mars rules destruction, conflict, death, assaults, and violence. On the other, it represents ambition, overcoming, exertion, determination, encouragement, strength, one's ability, and facing fears.

If you have an 8H Mars and faced any of the struggles above or anything similar and need someone to talk to you can always message me! I want this post to encourage the people who may feel stuck or are in a rough place that they can overcome whatever is thrown at them. Remember crisis comes first, then evolution and finally, total transformation. <3

In the 3rd and final part we'll go over struggles within intimate relationships 8H Mars folks might face and "taboo" topics these natives might enjoy.

[psychoticallytrans]

Society does not want disabled people to have children.

Have biological kids? "How could you do that to them? Aren't you supposed to love your kids? You know how bad it is to be you. How could you inflict that on them?"

Trying to adopt? "We just don't think you'd be a fit parent. We've rejected your application. By the way, have you considered sterilization, just to be sure?"

Taking in a kid informally because of their current living situation or lack of? "Are you sure you shouldn't pass them off to someone else? You know you're not as... capable... as the average caretaker. Kids are a lot of work."

Disabled people are not considered to be fit guardians by the mere fact that we are disabled. "Removal rates where parents have a psychiatric disability have been found to be as high as 70 percent to 80 percent; where the parent has an intellectual disability, 40 percent to 80 percent. In families where the parental disability is physical, 13 percent have reported discriminatory treatment in custody cases. Parents who are deaf or blind report extremely high rates of child removal and loss of parental rights. Parents with disabilities are more likely to lose custody of their children after divorce. In addition, prospective parents with disabilities have more difficulty when it comes to accessing reproductive health care such as assisted reproductive technologies, and they face significant barriers to adopting children."

-Rocking the Cradle: Ensuring the Rights of Parents with Disabilities and Their Children (2012, National Council on Disability)

[nebuladreamerrr]

Black sheep| Kylian Mbappé x Fem Reader

Summary: You had always felt rejected by your family's paternal side, but you managed to overcome it. However, one match could unleash a plethora of problems.

Warnings: English is not my first language and mention physical and psychological abuse by a paternal figure.

Little by little, at just twenty years old, you had managed to overcome all the obstacles that came your way. It wasn't easy, but with the support of your close circle of friends, you achieved it.

Childhood memories are hazy for you, often questioning if the few you hold truly belong to you or if they are just vague impressions shared when strangers inquire about your early years.

There were beautiful moments in childhood, especially when your father wasn't home. You remember singing summer songs loudly with your mother, her gentle hands combing through your hair as she deftly wove small braids secured with light blue hair ties—a tangible link to carefree, joyful days.

You loved school immensely. Every class fascinated you: from reading fairy tales to dancing at end-of-year parties, practicing carols for Christmas galas, and most of all, playing with classmates during recess. Whether it was tag, British Bulldog, or imitating singers from The Voice Kids, those moments overflowed with happiness.

But these memories darkened when you thought of your father. Despite living in Spain, he enforced a "French" education on you from a young age. He insisted on speaking only Spanish with your mother, and if he caught you playing alone and using a Spanish word instead of French, he would shout and intimidate you. "It's not 'muñeca', it's 'poupée'," he would sternly correct. Those echoes of shouts tainted the joyful memories with shadows of fear and strictness.

Luckily, on your eleventh birthday, your mother gave you the incredible gift of promising to divorce your father. It wasn't an easy decision for either of you. Firstly, because your mother had endured years of severe abuse, beginning with psychological mistreatment that later turned physical. Secondly, because your father was the main provider for the family, which often meant tightening belts to find moments of happiness. Despite the hardships, that promise marked the beginning of a new chapter—one where you started to find the peace and freedom you desperately needed.

With immense effort and dedication, you managed to open a small restaurant that became your family's main source of income. Once things stabilized, your mother finally fulfilled her dream: creating an association to support women who, like her, were trapped in abusive situations and couldn't escape due to fear or difficulties. The association provided shelter, money, clothing, and food to any woman, along with her children or pets, facing such circumstances.

Reflecting on it now, you couldn't be prouder of your mother. Not only for her incredible strength and resilience but also because she always supported your dreams. She became a beacon of hope and resilience for many other women. Her courage and dedication not only changed your lives but also touched and transformed many others.

After successfully completing your education despite the challenges, you faced a new wave of anxiety upon receiving a job offer as a physiotherapist for the French national football team. With an outstanding academic record and recognition from your professors as an exemplary student, evidenced by the honor roll distinction you received, you never imagined an international opportunity would come your way.

The issue wasn't the opportunity itself but the fear of working with international stars and, above all, with a prestigious team of physiotherapists. However, your primary concern was moving to France.

You hadn't set foot in that country since your father left to reunite with his relatives, who felt somewhat ashamed of him for not being able to "tame his lady." Just hearing that language again gave you goosebumps, and every attempt to speak French seemed to trigger a mental block.

But, as a beloved phrase reminds you, "If fear occupies your head, it leaves no room for your dreams." So, with a half-empty suitcase ready to be filled with memories and stories to share upon returning to Spain, you courageously departed for France in 2020. Since then, you've hardly ventured out of the country.

The enchanting French cities captivated you, and despite a few challenging encounters, you handled them with grace and chose to extend your stay. Not to mention, the team of physiotherapists was highly impressed with your work.

You still vividly remember your first day with the players. Nerves had you meticulously arranging bandages and creams, striving for a professionalism that mirrored your dedication. A soft knock on the door startled you, expecting someone at a distance, only to find a young, robust man on the other side.

Young Mbappé wasted no time in coming to your aid, concern evident in his eyes as he asked if you were alright. Despite the initial awkwardness, the session proceeded smoothly. Kylian took the opportunity to inquire about you throughout, his curiosity revealing a growing rapport. By the session's end, the young Frenchman boldly asked for your number and recommended you as his preferred physiotherapist to the trainers, advocating for all future appointments to be with you.

As the French training camp concluded, a deep friendship tinged with burgeoning affection had blossomed between you both, culminating in several dates that emboldened you to begin a relationship that proved profoundly positive for you both.

Over time, you gradually opened up more to Kylian. While he couldn't fathom or justify the challenges your father had imposed on your mother and you, he was resolute in not letting you slip away, grateful for the fortune of meeting you.

Following intense matches filled with surprises, including Kylian breaking his nose in one, France advanced to the semifinals. Despite being French, he understood and respected your steadfast support for Spain, a country synonymous with peace and security for you. Despite France treating you kindly in recent years, your bond with Spain remained unshakeable. And while you supported Spain nationally, Kylian knew he held a special place in your heart as your favorite player.

After a long and disappointing match where France fell short against Spain, conceding victory with two goals, Kylian felt the sting of defeat. Anticipating an uncomfortable press conference probing Rabiot's reaction and Lamine's triumph, his true yearning was to find solace in your arms, the sanctuary he sought since your first embrace.

Exiting the press conference, he swiftly made his way to the locker room for a cold shower and to swap into the national team jersey. Anxious to receive one of your comforting massages, he hastened towards you. Yet upon arrival, his surprise mounted upon seeing you visibly distressed while listening to an unfamiliar older man.

His astonishment grew as he approached and heard the hurtful words of your uncle: "Even twenty years from now, you will always be a disappointment. I wonder if you've struck a deal with your boyfriend to win a bet and some money. You're a small rat who will never rise socially. My brother made a grave mistake marrying your mother."

Before you could respond, you felt his strong arms around your waist, shielding you. Kylian intervened calmly yet firmly: "Excuse me, if you don't stop speaking like that, I'll be forced to call security. I won't allow you to belittle my girlfriend or her family. If you continue, all of France will know how you treat women, and your family business will suffer."

Taken aback by Kylian's response and swift action, your uncle chose to leave the stadium. Touched deeply by Kylian's display of love and protection, tears streamed down your face as you embraced him and whispered, "Thank you so much. I don't know what I would do without you, my king."

From the moment he met you, Kylian had made a vow to himself: he wouldn't let your family inflict pain on you again.

[codename-mom]

Is Hotch...

A good husband?

A good father?

Let’s be honest, the answer is: no (for both).

Why?

CW: mention of domestic/child abuse, cheating, divorce, death, difficulties for child conception, pregnancy

Hotch is not a good husband

We don’t know much about the way Hotch and Haley have lived between the moment they have met (in high school) and the moment Jack was born (a short time after Hotch became the BAU’s director).

We know that they have met each other at a very young age and that they get married years later, in 1998 (?). If we take into account the hypothesis that Hotch was born in 1965, he was then 32/33 years old. So, they’ve known each other and probably lived together for 15 years before their wedding.

Which is curiously long, admit it.

However, it’s possible that they have waited for their situation to be more stable. Hotch have studied law in Virginia until 1992. We know that in 1997, he was a federal prosecutor at Seattle (so, at the other side of the country) and that after he has met Dave, he has moved to Quantico to become a profiler (so, new crossing of the country).

Haley has then followed Aaron from one side to the other of the US, leaving behind her family and friends (a thing that doesn’t bother Hotch because he doesn’t seem to have any friend and, officially, his only family is an errand young brother who can’t stand him). Which is, I think, a huge sacrifice for someone jobless and kids free (at this time), of which the only activity is basically to see people.

Then come the time where Hotch started to work for the BAU. At first, simple federal agent in a small team (Gideon, Rossi and him + maybe two other persons vaguely evocated once, but it’s hard to know how much time they have worked for the agency), he has to multiply travels so as the unit could cover all the territory. From this moment, he began to desert the marital home, but we can imagine that Haley agreed because they were understaffed.

Then Dave went retired, and Jason has surrendered; Aaron became an FBI unit chief at 38/39 years old. – The timeline is quite chaotic talking about this character, but we see in season 3 that Penelope has arrived 4 years earlier, when Derek and Spencer (and JJ?) are already there and all the team is already on the 6th floor of Quantico (and not anymore in the basement of another building, where Jason and Dave were). So, we can establish that Hotch must be around that age when he became a director (let’s remind that Gideon and Rossi discover the new premises when they come back, respectively in season 1 and 3).

Since then, taking into account his workforce (we know the usual team + Anderson, but there are also other agents in the bullpen who must be part of the BAU like the others) and his status, it’s not inconsistent to think that he doesn’t need to be in the field anymore. He can also follow office schedules, more adapted to a couple’s life.

But, no, he continues to leave with his subordinates even if his presence is not useful (his only expertise is to have been a federal prosecutor, which is of no use for the investigations), and he continues to come very early at work and to leave the office very late at night. He clearly forsakes Haley to his team profit.

And the things get worse when Haley becomes pregnant and has to stay in bed when she has still several months to wait before birth. We’ve got a woman who have to move as less as possible to increase the chance of survival of her fetus and who need help. Her husband should have been by her side to support her and to make her daily life easier, but in place of that he wanders for days far away from her. (We can assume that Jessica and her parents did the job, but it’s not a reason).

And here we go again after Jack’s birth. First of all, nothing prove that he was there for the birth. In a cut scene, we learn that he knew that Haley had contractions when he was in an investigation, and he offered to turn back home. Haley told him to go on working, that everything was fine. The eventuality he arrived too late is not nil then (but it’s still theoretical).

But we know that he wasn’t there to help her to take care of Jack when he was newborn. So, when kids are the most demanding in term of time and energy. He has continued to go on the field and to do two many hours when he didn’t have to. It’s clear that he had left Haley all alone with the baby (and a sick baby because we learn in the episode S02E04 that he has a condition bad enough for him to go to the hospital – detail that will disappear then from the writers’ memory…).

Haley had then to handle, upfront, her son, all the household chores and all the possible issues occurring into a house; after having follow Aaron from one coast to the other of the US several times. If we add on this that he never talked about what he was doing (‘cause it was confidential), we can understand that she was fed up with all this and that she asked for divorce.

We can however give some arguments in favor of Hotch:

His job is vital for the survival of the citizens: he doesn’t peel potatoes or is an accountant, he’s involved in the arrest of serial killers, sociopaths, and psychopaths able to go after anyone’s life. To take the decision not to go on the field anymore or not to answer his phone at night and during weekends is not simple.

He’s the only one to work in the couple: in the episode S05E01, Haley tells Aaron that she’s “working now”, which means that she wasn’t before, and that Aaron was the only one subsiding to the needs of their family. I don’t know how much a federal agent of his rank is paid, but if we take into account the fact that they lived into a house with a garden, in DC suburbs, with two cars (we didn’t see Haley’s but I doubt she went to the hospital, to the mall and to Quantico with a stroller using public transports); it was necessary for them to have a certain amount of money. To work less, without the possible risk premiums going on the field, would have pushed the couple to move again and to restrain their lifestyle.

In the episode S01E22, we learn that household chores don’t seem to bother him, on a contrary (he looks so thrilled to accomplish all the tasks Haley wants him to do). As so, we can assume that the days he was there, he took over his wife on this point.

And finally, from episode S02E19, we learn that this situation – him working a lot when his wife and son live their life by their side – weighs on him and stresses him. He’s afraid to receive phone calls when he’s at home and to have no choice but to leave. If we suppose that he loves his job, he doesn’t forsake Haley and Jack joyfully either. He doesn’t abandon them because he’s mean or because he doesn’t like them, he just thinks that he doesn’t have any choice.

[In the same episode, we learn that his father was a womanizer who didn’t try to be discreet, and in the episode S01E08, we can think that the said father wasn’t particularly nice too. And then, in the episode S03E02, when he understands that his wife cheats on him, he shows absolutely no aggressiveness. On the contrary. Hotch could have copied the attitude of his sire and been way more violent with Haley at that exact time. Somewhere, she was lucky that he has a strong self-control and that he’s more the passive guy…]

Actually, the only thing Haley did wrong was to haven’t ask for divorce earlier (before Jack’s birth for example), because the man she has married was clearly not the one she has met in high school anymore. She would have had a different life, maybe with several children, and would have still been alive. She stood by his side, perhaps because it was easier, but it wasn’t the right solution knowing that Aaron is obviously not made for married life.

And not for family life too…      

Hotch is not a good father

Like we’ve seen it above, the probability that Aaron have missed Jack’s birth is not nil. And, if the arrival of his son was of his interest, the logic would have been for him to adapt his schedule and to not go on the field anymore with his team near the due date.

Then, we know that he didn’t help his wife with the baby and in the episode S01E19, Jessica reproached him to not hold Jack properly, which leads us to think that he’s not used to have him in his arms.

Divorce happens and, even if he’s the only one to have a salary, the child custody is entirely entrusted to Haley, probably because of his numerous travels and his schedules not at all compatible with a life with a kid (that and the fact that he can get shot at any moment every time he leaves for a case). From this moment, we can suppose that his visits depend to his ex-wife’s will; ex-wife who is nice enough to let him break in in the middle of the night to see a sleeping child. It’s of no interest for Jack (he doesn’t know that his father is there). Once again, logic wants that he shows up on weekends and by daylight.

Which he doesn’t seem to do because, in the episode S04E13, we learn that he has offered a Christmas present for his son but doesn’t know if the latter had appreciated or not. Several explanations for that:

He has sent the present by mail and wasn’t there then for the receipt.

He hasn’t saw Jack since even if he had the time to (several weeks/months pass between episodes)

He didn’t make the effort to call Haley or to sent her a message to have the information.

Well, he doesn’t do what’s necessary to keep in touch with his son.

Then Foyet shows up and we all know what’s happened: Hotch becomes a single dad in a sudden. And nothing gets better… Indeed, if we see in the episode S06E16 that he seems to be there in the morning to take Jack to school, he continues to work very late at night and to go on the field for several days without having contacts with him (we saw him calling Haley at the beginning of the show, but we don’t see him doing the same with his son). All the work is done by Jessica, Jack’s aunt: pick up at school, homework, dinner, shower/bath, movie/fairy tale, tooth brushing + complete support during investigations.

Well, we understand that this is a suggestion of Jessica herself (Jack is the only "thing" left from her dead sister, we can get that she doesn’t want to lose her connection with her nephew), but Hotch doesn’t hesitate for long to pass it on and to get back to his old habits of workaholic, still not suitable for parenting. And he doesn’t seem to care about the fact that Jessica could wish to have her own family and that she must have a job and her own personal activities. He has the right to work – a kid is not free, so it’s normal that he keeps his job, especially when you know how much studies cost in US – but he could have adapted his schedules. But he didn’t.

You’re going to tell me: “Yes, but he’s there for Jack soccer encounters.” He’s there to train the team. He’s there to give orders and to handle a dozen of kiddos on Sunday morning. He’s still working, and his attention is not only directed on Jack, but on all the players. He’s just doing the cab between the apartment and the club, that’s all. Especially that we see in episode S10E20, he’s still working home (exactly like when he was married), which could mean that Jack is on his own when his father is there.

(Stop drooling, people! I know he's hot, but it's not the point. He has an office in his apartment (look behind his sexy hips).)

Well, we discover in the episode S07E04 that he’s regularly learning to Jack how to read the evening (to the point that Jack is well ahead of his comrades on that subject) and at the beginning of the episode S11E22, we understand that he and JJ often drive Jack and Henry to school in the morning. We also see him building a hut in the living-room in the episode S07E23, searching for a last minute Halloween costume in S10E05 and he's doing cookies with him in S06E06.

All this seem to prove that there are some interactions between them. But sadly, it doesn’t compensate the fact that he’s absent for the Halloween costume contest, that he skips the school trip to the museum and that he leaves his son to the hands of a woman he knows for a few months (Beth) in a city he and Jack barely know (New York). All these absences could have been avoided if he did just trust his men and let them handle the cases on their own. (I mean we talk about a guy who took a dangerous mission overseas when he has a son alone at home...)

And he knows it. He knows that he’s bad. He knows that his son agrees to his absences because he sees him as a hero. In the episode S11E22, tensions appear because Jack is not a little boy who idealize his father anymore and that he starts to understand that all this is not normal. That to privilege unknown people over his own child, it’s bad. And Hotch feels that the wind has changed as he speaks about it to JJ in the said episode. I think that if Thomas Gibson hadn’t been fired from the show, we would have seen conflicts between father and son because of his lack of involvement.

If I wanted to explain his behavior – without forgiving it – I’ll stress out that we start with a couple who knows each other for more than twenty years before the arrival of the baby. Which is abnormally long. (I know people who willingly had a kid when they only knew each other for a few months…)

The first explanation could be that they had some difficulties to conceive. One of them could have been sterile to a certain degree which makes difficult a natural conception. Or there is also the possibility of biological incompatibility between them (some vaginal biomes can be toxic for the spermatozoa of some individuals). Or certain external factors could have complicated the process. In any case, it could explain why the couple had only one child after so many years of marital life.

The second explanation – which is my personal headcanon – is that one of them didn’t want a kid (and by that, I mean he didn’t want one).

If we think about the fact that Hotch seems to have had a rotten childhood because of his disrespectful and violent father, and his resigned mother (she knew about the affairs of her husband, surely didn’t ignore his brutality, but she stayed with him and she even had another child with him 15 years later (yes, I know, beaten wives are under the influence of their torturer and to quit this vicious circle is extremely difficult; but from Aaron’s point of view, he was facing a woman who made the choice to stay no matter how the situation was dangerous for her and for him, in place of leaving and improving their chance of survival. Worse, she even has accepted to keep and give birth to another of his child…)), it’s not weird to imagine that he didn’t want to start his own family. He didn’t have any good example of what is a good father or a good mother. He doesn’t know what a warm home looks alike. [May I remember you that Hotch doesn’t celebrate his birthday (Haley and Jessica wished him once, but when we see how Penelope wishes it to him in the episode S09E06, we understand that she’s the only one to know); which could underline the fact that it wasn’t a happy day for him when he was a child.] In the end, he could have delayed this eventuality as long as possible.

How has Jack arrived tho? Several possibilities again:

Reassured by Haley and a little bit more comfortable with his abilities, he would have accepted his wife request.

Haley blackmailed him: “Give me that child or I leave”. To not lose her, he would have agreed no matter his fears.

Jack is not Aaron’s child.

I lean for the second option, which also explains the fact that he has some hard time to create a connection with his son. He didn’t really want him and he’s still thinking that he’ll be a bad father because of his past.

I could add that his autism doesn’t make the thing easier, but it’s another debate.

___

To make it short, Hotch is not made for marital life or family life no matter what.

Don't misunderstand me. I love the character but I can't forget that he has (huge) flaws. He's not the perfect man that we (fanfics writers) want him to be. He's neglectful on many points outside of his job. And that's why he's interesting in my opinion. A flawless character would have been so boring.

(Damn! This post took ages. None only because the gif search on Tumblr is all crap, but because I've got to rewatch countless episodes to find one line of dialogue so useful for this explanation. ^^; Hopefully, the next one will be less demanding.)

[cepheustarot]

Message to yourself from the future

Paid Readings

Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur. You build your own life and destiny.

Pick a pile. Choose one or more pictures. Trust your intuition.

Pile 1: Your future is presented in gloomy colors, here the solution of some problem has dragged on for so long that you have neither the strength nor the resources to deal with it, you are very emotionally exhausted here. Perhaps someone is already in such a state that there is literally no strength for anything, you feel tired, it is difficult for you to return to the usual rhythm. However, this period ends here and you find a way out of this situation, so it's not so bad! you find the strength and get out of it, well done! Allso, you from the future wants to warn you not to get involved with one person, he may be a gemini, libra or aquarius, he may also be younger than you. Even if these facts are not about him, rely on characters traits, the person himself is quite windy, does not know what he wants, he is one of those who first does and then thinks. He can also aggravate the situation, start a conflict or a dispute and at the same time get away with it, leaving the guilty one who is in fact not guilty of anything. He also does not keep his promises, shifts responsibility for his actions to another person, so be careful! The advice to you from the future says, you do not need to give up, keep moving, even if it will be small steps, you will still deal with all the difficulties of life, remember that you are stronger than you think!

Pile 2: Here your future is significantly different from what is happening to you now, your life has changed, you have changed it yourself! Perhaps you didn't have the courage or the resources, or you didn't have the opportunity to change something in your life, but you finally take everything into your own hands, and as soon as you did, doors with opportunities opened up in front of you! In other words, here is a new stage of life, something new and it can be anything from a change of activity to a change of residence, a new social circle, appearance, in general, everything that you have long wanted to bring to life. A warning to you from the future says, you should not refuse the opportunity, one person will offer you his help, according to the zodiac sign he is capricorn, virgo, taurus, but it is not necessary that the zodiac sign coincides, look at his character! by himself, a person is active, achieves his goals, knows what he wants, he has plans for life, he has already outlined a path to achieve his dreams there and is now following it, he is also financially stable, he always has money and he spends it wisely, he is also smart enough and erudite. If you refuse, you will greatly regret it and will be sad for a long time about the missed opportunity. Perhaps this person is you yourself and then you should not throw everything halfway, you need to keep moving towards what you want. Advice to you from the future: you should know your limits and understand that you can't jump over your head, don't overdo it and don't overestimate yourself too much. everything will come to you in time!

Pile 3: In general terms, your love sphere is radically changing, and your status is changing, perhaps you will marry someone or vice versa get divorced. There is a chance that you will create a family business and develop it in the future, or you will find a good partner with whom a successful transaction will take place and it will bring you a lot of money.  Warning: if talking about business, then you will face a lot of competition, and in general this may concern not only business, but any area where competition is possible in one way or another. If you get married or get divorced, then many people, your acquaintances, friends, parents or someone from your partner's side will be against this or that decision, they will put pressure on you and try to force you to change your mind, reconsider decisions.  Advice to you from the future: do not listen to anyone and do as you see fit! You need to listen to yourself, your desires, thoughts, priorities, only you know how to build your life

[hopeastrz]

𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐌 𝐂𝐎𝐄𝐋𝐈 (𝐈𝐂) 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐁𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒:👒

𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐥𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐬.

𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 – 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 might indicate having difficulties with the mother figure, she might’ve been distant or absent in general, also from my opinion it may mean having divorced parents.

𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 – 𝐒𝐮𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 is the ‘trying so hard with all your might to impress your father and failing miserably’ placement. Maybe you found some difficulties with him even when you were trying your hardest, but it always seems that your efforts are somewhat lacking. This placement also might indicate having a single father.

The house in which you have a 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐦 is your house main theme, 𝟐𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐦 money matters are always discussed or present, 𝟔𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐦 maybe health & daily routine situations are always prominent in your days.

Also the house you have a 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐦 in tells you what you are or what you’re known to be in your family, 𝟏𝟎𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 the most successful, 𝟗𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 the most educated or religious, 𝟓𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 the most talented, wild etc..

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧 tells us what you focus on the most or the most important thing between you and your family, if you for example 𝐬𝐮𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟑𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 communication is important to you, 𝟓𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧 your hobbies and daily activities, also your love life!.

𝐕𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟐𝐧𝐝 / 𝟏𝟏𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 means that the mother or another prominent female figure is the main income source of the household. 𝐈𝐟 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐧 then the father, grandparents or you ‘in the 𝐬𝐮𝐧 case’.

𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝟕𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞, 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐝𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐬 (𝟕,𝟏𝟗) may indicate fearing ending up in a marriage that reminds you of your parents, which is your biggest nightmare.

𝑷𝒍𝒖𝒕𝒐 𝟏𝟐𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒔𝒆, you really should seek therapy because the bare minimum damage your parents cause might take the biggest toll on you.

𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐀𝐂 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐀𝐂 aspects might indicate that you’re the elder child, if 𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐬, 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐜 that means the opposite.

𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 - 𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 may have felt that they are the least beautiful sibling / member in the family.

I think 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 in general tells you what and where you lacked the most or ‘if i had that my life would’ve been better’, for example 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝟐𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 you lacked financial support, 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 – 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 lacked motherly affection, 𝐂𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 – 𝐬𝐮𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 lacked recognition.

𝟑𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧 your siblings are very important in your life, if positively aspected you love them dearly, if negatively let’s say for example 𝐬𝐮𝐧 — 𝐩𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 (𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐬𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐞) your life might’ve went downhill after they were born?, or you completely changed because of them.

𝐔𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 tells you where there was no discipline or too much freedom without thinking of the consequences. The more aspects the more likely you had a chaotic childhood, 𝐢𝐟 𝐔𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲 maybe your parents sucked at planing your life, or making choices, 𝐔𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝟐𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 your parents were wasteful.

𝟑𝐫𝐝 𝐨𝐫 𝟗𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 sun your education years were very prominent in your childhood.

𝐀𝐜 is how you view your family, 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐀𝐜 you view them as your responsibility, 𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐀𝐜 your escapism or your therapy (either the reason you need therapy or your their therapy), 𝐬𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 the cause of your daily change, 𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 what brings you harmony, 𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 everything you’ve got, 𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 your motivation.

I think that where 𝐍𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐞 falls tells you what you wish to escape or forget the most in you childhood, if aspected with 𝐍𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐬 (𝟕𝟎𝟔𝟔) 𝐛𝐲 𝟎, -𝟏 𝐨𝐫 -𝟐 𝐨𝐫𝐛 orb you may want to forget the abuse went through. 𝐍𝐞𝐩𝐭𝐮𝐧𝐞 – 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 you’d pay everything you have in order to forget about your mother.

If 𝐍𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐬 (𝟕𝟎𝟔𝟔) 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐬 (𝟏,𝟏𝟑,𝟐𝟓) you might’ve been physically abused, 𝟏𝟐𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 & 𝟑𝐫𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 mentally, 𝟓𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 being told that you’re not good enough or compared to other people.

[bullet-prooflove]

Hi. This is an ask for Bishop Losa. The prompt is: 12. God only knows how long I’ve waited for this. Thank you so much.

Companion piece to:

Black Satin (NSFW) - Bishop discovers a surprise Christmas gift.

Gingerbread - Bishop comes home to a problem.

Snow - Bishop talks to you about something that's been on his mind.

You’ve been sitting in the car for fifteen minutes, your hands gripping the steering wheel as you stare at the wall in front of you when the ringing of your phone brings you out of your reverie. You glance down to see Bishop’s name; you can’t deal with him right now, so you let it ring out.

You’re still in a state of shock from your doctor’s appointment because what they’re telling you, it can’t be right.

You’re pregnant, two months pregnant which should be physiologically impossible because Bishop’s had a vasectomy and you’ve always had difficulty conceiving, it’s the reason you and your ex-husband divorced.

You’re still in a daze when he gets home that night. He finds you sitting at the kitchen table, your hands wrapped around a mug of ginger tea because that morning sickness, it’s become an all day thing.

“You alright?” He asks, his fingers tip your chin up so he can look into your eyes. You can see the concern etched into his features as his thumb ghosts along the line of your jaw.

“Obispo…” You murmur as his lips brush over the corner of your mouth. “I’m pregnant.”

You see the moment the news hits him, his eyes widen, and he opens his mouth to speak but no words come out. He drops down into the kitchen chair, your knees bumping against each other as he scoots it closer so that he’s within your proximity. His gaze comes to rest on your abdomen, where a baby, his baby currently resides.

“I don’t understand…” He says his voice breaking. “I thought we couldn’t have one.”

“The doctor thinks your vasectomy must have failed and my situation…” You trail off because there’s an ache in your chest.

You’d been told that the chance of having a baby of your own was minuscule. You’d given up hope of having a child, you both had.

Bishop reaches out, his palm coming to rest on your abdomen. The edges of his mouth tip up into a smile as his thumb chases over the space where his baby resides. His eyes fucking sting because he’d never imagined that this was a possibility, that he’d be able to have a family of his own again. He looks up at you and he can tell you feel the same way.

Your hand comes to rest upon his as he leans in close, his fingertips brushing the tears from your cheek as his forehead comes to rest upon yours.

“We’re having a baby, Mi Cielito” He whispers, and you can feel his smile against your lips. “We’re having baby.”

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[11queensupreme11]

I think that regardless of the divorce between Hades and Persephone the seasons will continue to happen, if we think about the myth we will remember that the reason why Persephone was permanently trapped in the underworld was because before returning to her mother she ate some seeds of pomegranate, so following this reasoning we can think that their marriage was just a formality to preserve Persephone's honor since she was kidnapped and probably abused by Hades (we know that at that time if a woman was abused she should marry the abuser to preserve her and her family’s honor)

We know that some curses cannot be broken even by the gods (Beelzebub as an example) so we just need to think that the curse present in pomegranates (it is in all underworld foods) are so strong that even the gods who eat them are forced to be trapped in the underworld without being able to free herself, so Persephone would still be forced to spend 6 months in the underworld but now she is no longer forced to be imprisoned in the Palace of Hades and is free from the obligations of a wife

As the curse still forces her to spend part of the year there, the seasons continue as her mother is still unhappy with the situation but now the seasons (mainly autumn and winter) are much milder as Demeter is happy with her divorce. daughter, the seasons being milder (autumn and winter) and stronger (spring and summer) is not necessarily good since climate change can accidentally destroy the existing ecosystem, it would practically be divine global warming melting the ice areas, leaving deserts and hot areas in hellish temperatures, plants and food would ONLY be able to grow in spring since this would be the only climate that would not have an excessive change, which although it doesn't seem like it is very bad since planting only in one area for just a long period of time without giving the soil time to rest will deplete all nutrients from the soil leaving it infertile

Due to the changes, it would be impossible to plant food in other seasons as fruits and vegetables would not be able to adapt to climate changes and it would be unnecessary to resort to the use of pesticides and other artificial cultivation techniques to keep the few harvests alive, this would affect the quality of the crop. food would decline and would cause prices to increase since with the drop in food production it would not be able to match the great demand of the population and this would cause an increase in world hunger and food insecurity for the poorest people since we know that when there is a large demand for a limited quantity of a product the price of that product will naturally rise

The problem will be so big that it will probably also affect animals, wild animals will have difficulty adapting to climate change (probably these animals died from heat and cold as their bodies were not adapted, in fact now that I think about the high temperatures can lead to natural fires that would devastate entire forests) and many will die due to lack of food (without plants, herbivores will not be able to feed themselves and without herbivores, predators will not be able to feed themselves and this will probably collapse many ecosystems), the Livestock industries will also be affected as they, in addition to having difficulty feeding animals, will have to worry about them dying due to the climate (many industries will probably go bankrupt) with the drop in production products such as meat of any kind will probably rise in price which will undermine people's purchasing power, which will generate even greater food insecurity

In short, everyone on earth will suffer because Percy indirectly destroyed a harmonious ecosystem thousands of years old because she is so hot and charismatic, I can't imagine the look on her face knowing that humans are dying as collateral damage of her being in an ALMOST relationship romantic relationship between her and the yanderes, not to mention the damage that Poseidon can do with the tides, Beelzebub with diseases and violence and Apollo with literal Global warming, our girl is indirectly leading humans to extinction just by exist

BRO???? 💀💀💀

i have to ask, but are you an environmentalist major or something related to that????

cuz i remember you (or at least i think it was you) sending a previous long ask about the consequences of poseidon making it dangerous for humans to be in the sea, you were talking about pearls, medicine, sea food, etc and it was sooooo well-written and detailed omg 😂

but everything you wrote is EXACTLY why i'm making it so all four seasons still exist 💀 talking about the aftermath with the ecosystem is just give me psychic damage cuz i'll feel like i'm back in my bio class again 🫠

[bumblebeehug]

I've watched season 1-3 of winx in less than 4 days, and I'm so glad I grew up on that instead of cocomelon. Even when the script seemed cringe and not as fleshed out as it could be, they never made the people watching the show seem stupid (they made Bloom seem stupid instead, lol (half-joke)). The dialogue could be simplefied and sometimes a bit naive, but at the same time they never made it feel very simple? Maybe I'm just blinded bc I'm a sucker for illustrated animations, but the fact that they could make a complicated storyline with a lot of character arcs, while keeping the dialogue simple enough for kids to follow, is just amazing. And as if that wasn't amazing enough, the show had good balance in the art - it was colourful, the characters were dynamic and unique with different siluettes (something i rarely see in kids shows today), while also appealing to the preteen audience: the winx girls are strong, stylish, girly girls, who can seek out love from men without needing them to save them. They show that you can be unique in your friend group, and you can still be loved and appreciated (thinking about Musa, Techna and later on Aisha/Layla, who all aren't the stereotypical sweet/soft/stylish girls, but who still find friends who love them for who they are). (More analysis beneath the read more thing - mainly a discussion on how family is represented in the show and how important it is for children to be able to look up to female figures that can represent them. + some other stuff.)

Winx also casts light on a lot of different family dynamics - something i've only really seen Bluey do well recently. Stella's parents are divorced, Bloom is adopted, Musa's relationship with her dad is strained ever since her mom died, Aisha/Layla is an only child who struggled with lonliness despite having both of her parents together (they were absent bc of their royal duties), Techna doesnt seem to have any mayor issues, nor does Flora. And the thing is - these struggles are shown in such natural ways in the show. All of these dynamics turn out to be part of their journeys - Bloom struggles as a fairy because of her unknown past, so she must resolve it and find out more to be able to become a fully fledged fairy. Stella has dealt with her divorced parents most of her life, but in season 3 the entire Valtor thing strains her relationship with her father, and she has to overcome it so she can save him from Cassandra or whatever that duchess was called (girlie practically gets banned from her home planet, don't you forget). Faragonda brings Musa's dad to her first concert, which once again strains their relationship, but then strengthens it when he sees how capable she is, both as a musician and as a fairy. Aisha/Layla displays how it is to have more traditional parents - as a child she had lots of expectations to be a proper princess, which she for a long time still had trauma from, plus that her parents wanted to pick her future husband for her (they were all lucky that the two of them matched well lol). And then we have Flora who showed off sisterhood in an amazing way - worrying over and scolding her little sister, but never doubting for a second that she'd risk her life to save her. To the point though - everyone faces difficulties that can be reflected in most people's lives, and the show makes these journeys meaningful and important. I personally never had a need to see myself represented in my family situation, but my friend had divorced parents, and she told me that Stella's viewpoint made it easier for little her to deal with it. If Stella could overcome it (reminder that she still allowed herself to feel sad about it) then so could my friend.

Now, while I'm at it, I might as well continue ranting:

Maybe I'm just not updated in modern shows, but isn't there an entire market of preteens who are missing these types of shows today? We're always talking about how clothing trends and social media is forcing younger people to grow up eariler, but let's not forget that these kids have nothing if they don't decide to grow up immediately. There's no shows, no "toys" (i'm mostly talking about merch that caters to young people - "H2O just add water" pillowcases and diaries etc) and no older teens in these shows setting appropriate clothing trends. Shows aren't cool enough nowadays for preteens to see the appeal of being young. Too many shows are changing their target audience to younger and younger children - and not only shows! Just look at the Nesquik bunny! He went from 100% drip and style, to 100% millenial.

Ik this isn't anyone in particulars fault, but this is just my way of saying: go back to unique styles and outfits! Shows aren't cool anymore, and removing the illustrated style and exaggeration is absolutely part of that.

I also saw someone on TikTok critique the pace of the earlier seasons - they said everything was too slow-paced and boring, and honestly? I couldn't disagree more. Now, I don't have any difficulties concentrating, so maybe it's a bigger problem for people with ADHD or similar diagnosis, but the slower pace gave more time for me to immerse myself in the winx world. They added amazing vocals and soundtrack, that could either showcase heartbreak or joy, and these details made the show reach much higher quality, despite looking like it was made in the cheapest animation program ever.

I went off on a tangent, but I'm getting back to winx now - what I mean is that kids nowadays have no authentic way of finding shows like winx, mainly because there aren't any! Most shows are made for kids under the age of 8 or over the age of 13, and there's almost no inbetween. Shows don't do it like winx did anymore - they don't make the art appealing enough (bc the shows are never illustrated - fair enough i'll add, bc illustrated animation is too expensive to be profitable nowadays, but not even the animation is appealing anymore, they're all rapunzel-lookalikes/wannabes), they don't trust that the watchers have brains and critical thinking, so they make the stories too dumb, they don't have the guts to make scary storylines, and they try so hard to be inclusive without actually succeeding at it (making all the fairies even paler than what they were in the beginning of the show).

I'm sure everything I've said here has been said before a trillion times, but I wanted to get it off my chest. I won't blame anyone if they decide that they ain't reading allat bc i really ran with this. If u did read this though, thanks! And sorry if i spelled things wrong, I'm writing this on a Swedish computer that insists that every single word is spelled incorrectly, lol.

[gem-femmes]

10 Conversation Topics to Create a Deep Connection

In my previous post about gatekeeping yourself, I outlined some conversation topics that make you seem open but actually reveal nothing important about your life and personality.

Sometimes, when you trust someone and want to build a deeper relationship with them, you want the opposite. Topics that reveal significant and personal information about your life tend to be more intimate and complex.

These topics are also more revealing. They can lead to deeper connections, but they also make you more vulnerable.

Sharing these details might give others deeper insight into your personality, values, and life circumstances. Here are some examples:

Family relationships: Discussing your relationships with family members, any family conflicts, or dynamics.

Financial situation: Talking about your income, debts, savings, or financial challenges.

Romantic relationships: Sharing details about your romantic life, relationship struggles, or future plans with a partner.

Health issues: Revealing personal or family health problems, mental health struggles, or past trauma.

Career challenges: Discussing difficulties or setbacks in your career, workplace conflicts, or future career plans.

Life goals and aspirations: Talking about your long-term goals, dreams, or the deeper reasons behind your choices in life.

Past failures or regrets: Opening up about mistakes you've made, things you regret, or failures that have impacted you significantly.

Personal beliefs and values: Sharing your core beliefs, religious views, political opinions, or moral values, especially if they’re deeply personal or controversial.

Significant life events: Discussing events that have had a major impact on your life, such as a divorce, death of a loved one, or a life-changing decision.

Inner thoughts and feelings: Expressing your deepest fears, anxieties, hopes, or emotional struggles.

Be careful and use these topics wisely - share them only with people you trust and feel comfortable with.

Remember, when in doubt, always gatekeep yourself. 🥀✨❤️

[fracturediron]

This whole argument scene between Non's parents and the subsequent fight before he leaves the house is just heartbreaking. For anyone who has a dysfunctional family where screaming rows like this are commonplace, it's incredible relatable. Being powerless to stop your parents fighting, maybe even being the cause of your parents fighting, and feeling like it's all your fault. And no matter where you go in the house to cry, it's never far away enough not to still hear the screaming.

I've mentioned it before, but something I really enjoy about DFF is how none of the characters are completely good or bad, or particularly perfect in the way they handle difficult emotional situations, and that's also demonstrated with Non's parents. They honestly feel like the most realistic parents and family I've seen written for TV, especially parents of this generation.

So often, TV parents of happy families are 'flawed' and will make a mistake, only to be actually self-aware enough to realise they've done wrong or they fucked up with their kid, and to make it up to their kid(s) before episode's end, resolving everything happily.

Whereas real life really isn't like that. So many of these parents, when they're flawed, are really fucking flawed not just as people, but as parents! So many parents of that generation aren't self-aware! So many of these parents were also abused by their parents and went through the same kind of dysfunction, sometimes even worse than what they do to us! So many of these parents need fucking therapy and it will never even cross their mind because therapy's only for 'crazy' people! So many of these parents don't realise how unapproachable they make themselves to their kids and that's why they can never come to them with their problems! So many of these parents probably would've been happier divorced but will never do that and will stick together screaming at each other until one of them dies! So many of these parents will never, ever apologise for the harm they did to you, either because they don't realise they've even caused any harm, or because "Well, I'm your parent! I'm always in the right!"* So many of these parents are emotionally abusive without even realising they are or that emotional abuse is even a thing! Because hey, back in their day, they would've gotten beaten; you've got it so much better.**

Rant aside, though, for all their flaws, severe dysfunction and at times, frankly terrible ways they're handling this whole situation with Non, Non's parents still clearly love him. Yes, I say clearly. It's easy to hate on Non's parents (and for many of us who come from dysfunctional families, this is probably even easier; it's incredibly easy to relate to Non and a lot of his circumstances), and I've seen comments doing just that. However, as with Jin, I don't think Non's parents are monsters either.

Money might not buy happiness, but it definitely makes things easier. And if your family's poor, and constantly struggling to make ends meet or having to take out loans to support your kids, that makes your life circumstances already so much harder.

The myth of the perfect 'happy family' cultivates the idea that if your parents love you, then you'll all be happy together always and your family life will be perfect.

But in real life, your parents can love you - honestly, truly love you and care about your wellbeing - and still really screw you up emotionally. Sometimes, no matter how much they love you, it isn't enough to prevent then fucking up parenting and failing you catastrophically. It's a bitter pill to swallow.

For all the difficulties they have with each other and their child, he's still their son and they still care for him. Again, for all the terrible ways they're handling this whole thing, they care about him enough to make sure he gets the medication he needs, for his dad to stick up for him to his mum, for his mum to try and go after him when he leaves, for them to put aside their differences when he goes missing and to look into raising the money for a new lawyer to look into his disappearance. They're clearly worried and devastated that he's missing!

I wasn't really sure where this was going when I first started writing it, and I'm not sure how to end this, apart from thinking, well... the Prathipsits as a whole really are unfortunate.

*Adding footnotes because otherwise this would've broken up the flow of my writing. Although I enjoyed Turning Red, for real, the most unrealistic part was a Chinese mother actually apologising to her child. ASIAN PARENTS NEVER SAY THEY'RE SORRY AHAHA :'). The fat-shaming aunties, though, that was too real lol.

**While corporal punishment has decreased in general in most of Asia (and this'll vary by countries, but at least in some places, is not pracised in schools anymore), it's still seen in some parts or in some forms or contexts as acceptable by the older generation. Like, I'm a millenial in my late 20s, and I know male cousins or friends around the same age who still got physically beaten by their parents when they didn't do well in school or got in trouble, and that was just seen as normal by the parents and their peers. They didn't see it as abusive at all (their kids, not so much); just what was necessary to literally whip their kids into shape. Obviously, physical abuse is bad.

[ykzzr]

Deadly love (22 June 1908)

(On this day 115 years ago, Prince Nikolai Yusupov and Count Arvid Manteuffel duel took place, in which Nikolai was killed for his beloved Marina.)

In March 1908, at one of the dinners of amateur artists from high society youth, Nikolai was introduced to the young Countess Marina Haydn. Marina, as a lady-in-waiting to the Empress, was invited to take part in a charity performance.

She was 19 years old and was about to marry the captain of the Life Guards Cavalry Regiment, Count Arvid Ernstovich Manteuffel, heir to an old Baltic family.

Yusupov played the role of a man in the play, and Marina unexpectedly boldly chose the role of a nasty hunchbacked old woman, who played her role deftly and cheerfully. Nikolai Yusupov could not help but pay attention to such a charming girl.

Their meeting can be called a fatal chance. Passion broke out between them instantly, and the fact that Marina's wedding took place a month later did not stop them.

Nikolai Yusupov was going to marry Marina, but his mother, Zinaida Nikolaevna Yusupova, did not agree to this marriage.

When Marina learned of Zinaida's refusal to see her as her son's wife, she began begging her lover: "Let's run outside and get married!" They planned to escape, but Marina's mother intervened: she couldn't allow her daughter to escape so shamefully before the wedding with a man.

The girl tearfully begged her parents to cancel the wedding, but to no avail. On the eve of the wedding, the two lovers met. On April 22, 1908, Nikolai Yusupov and Marina Gaydin arranged a farewell dinner in a separate room of the restaurant, Marina and Arvid Manaville's wedding took place on April 23, 1908, as planned. There were three hundred guests at the wedding. Zinaida Nikolaevna Yusupova sighed softly: this is all resolved.

After the wedding, they went to France for their honeymoon. Left alone with her unloved husband, the beautiful, eccentric Marina realizes the horror of her situation as a recluse in a golden cage, She bombarded Nikolai Yusupov daily with passionate letters, begging him to come, and Nikolai followed marina to France

Marina asked her husband for a divorce, but was refused. Seizing the moment, she secretly met Nikolai Yusupov, who settled nearby at the Hotel Maurice in Paris.

After that, Marina and Nikolai, as if forgetting about decency, appear together in society, at fairs, at operas and restaurants. Arvid finds out quickly enough and demands an explanation from his wife, Marina in the midst of a quarrel, boldly says to her husband: "I'm leaving you. It's all over between us!" Indeed, she leaves her husband.

Inspired, Nikolai Yusupov writes a letter to his mother and again asks permission to marry Marina, who is on the verge of a divorce.

Then Count Manteuffel, in order not to become a laughing stock in society, challenges Yusupov to a duel. He is instigated by regimental comrades: "Yusupov insulted your honor and dignity! It can't be left like that. Only a duel..."

Nikolai wrote to his beloved Marina in their last letter:

“I am not afraid of death, but it’s hard for me to die away from you without seeing you one last time.

Goodbye forever, I love you."

The duel took place on June 22, 1908 in St. Petersburg, on Krestovsky Island At the predawn hour.

At 8 o'clock in the morning on June 22, 1908, Nikolai Yusupov was mortally wounded in the chest. An honest passion cost the prince his life: the cold-bloodedly offended Manteuffel shot Nikolai, who shot twice into the air, from a distance of fifteen steps.

Felix Yusupov described this tragic day as follows: “I heard tearful cries from my father's room I entered and saw him very pale in front of the stretcher on which the body of Nikolai was stretched out, my mother, kneeling before him seemed to have lost her mind. With great difficulty they separated her from her son's body and put her to bed after they had Calmed down a bit, she called me but when she saw it she thought it was her brother it was an unbearable sight then the mother fell into prostration and when she came to herself she would not let me go for a moment.

Nikolai Feliksovich Yusupov was buried in the Arkhangelsk family estate. Marina begged Nikolai's family for permission to say goodbye to her lover, but she was refused. Shaken by Yusupov's death, Marina was in a terrible state. Her family sent her to a clinic in Geneva, where she spent several months.

Marina and Arvid's life is turned upside down: they become outcasts in society. She is a shameless married woman who killed a brilliant young man, a cold-blooded killer.

They finally got divorced. Count Manteville left military service, went first to Latvia, and then to France, where he died in 1931 at the age of 52.

Marina in 1916 married Colonel Mikhail Mikhailovich Chichagov, with whom she left for Europe. They had one son, who died in infancy. Marina and Mikhail's marriage collapsed.

At the end of her life, Marina Haydn published the book "Sapphire brings misfortune", which was published in only 100 copies. Marina Alexandrovna died alone in Monte Carlo in 1974 at the age of 86. Marina Haydn kept Nikolai Yusupov's letter as a great relic.

[quranwithsehar]

You were applying for a job, but it didn't work out. You were really hoping it would work out, or you were really hoping to get accepted into the university. Unfortunately, you didn't get accepted at the university. Those are the kinds of tests where you could feel depressed or sad, but you can't live in that sadness. Feeling those emotions at first doesn't mean you don't have Sabr. You can have those feelings and experience those emotions, then pick yourself up and try again.

So, you can have a dip, a low, and a high – that's being human. Allah didn't create us as angels. Sometimes we may face other trials, for example, an engagement that broke off, a marriage that ended miserably, or not wanting parents to get divorced, and they did. These situations involve people, people doing things that hurt us or things we wish they didn't do.

I think the solace, at least for me, comes from the stories in the Quran where people much better than us, like Yunus, had no control over his family. He didn't have any control; Ibrahim, an incredible human being, had no say in his father's choices. We cannot control other people's choices, and sometimes those choices deeply hurt us. People much better than us were hurt deeply. Ibrahim AS being kicked out of his house was not easy; being married to Firaun was not easy. For Musa AS, running away from home was not easy. These people were traumatized by many terrible experiences. Allah taught us through them that we can only control what is within our grasp, and we have to learn to let go of what isn't.

In the end, we say, "To Allah, we belong, and to Him, we are going to return." Any problem I'm having, how long is it going to last? Well, as long as I last. I'm not here for that long. When I think about the grand scheme of things, this problem isn't as big as I think it is. And of course, Allah has given us hope too. After every difficulty, there is great ease. Now, put yourself in their shoes; how much did the companions love the Prophet? When he died, how devastated were they? In that moment, for them to believe the Quran is still there, saying, "With difficulty comes twice the ease." They were devastated, in tears, broken, but their faith allowed them to heal and move forward. Allah created so much ease for the ummah afterwards.

That's just this life; it's going to come with trials and difficulties. Allah has made us mentally prepared that life isn't going to be easy; He said it many times. We all have trials; don't believe someone else has an easy life because they appear to on social media. Everyone has things causing them hurt; the person next to you has things causing them hurt. These influencers may talk about the blessings of Allah, but that doesn't mean they're showered with blessings every morning and have no issues.

Sometimes we run after things that are not real, believing them to be real because someone else has them. We may think others don't have any challenges, but everyone deals with their own pain. Allah tests people differently, but we don't see the other person's trial or know that their trial is the same as ours. We might wonder why Allah is not testing someone else or why we couldn't have it easy like they do. We don't know their reality, so these thoughts should give us some comfort. Whatever trial Allah has picked for me, whatever loss, whatever experience, is something I'm supposed to learn from, learn and grow from. Keep moving forward.

-Ustad Nouman Ali Khan

[houseofbrat]

I love Google Translate...

Kate Middleton 's life is at a crossroads marked by illness and loneliness. As she faces a tough battle with cancer, she finds herself increasingly isolated in her home, with the responsibility of caring for her three children falling solely on her shoulders. On the other hand, Prince William , her husband, seems to maintain a parallel life that is far from the supportive public image that he tries to project. In his first public engagement following the announcement of Kate 's cancer diagnosis , Prince William attempted to show a caring and caring side. During a visit to Surplus to Supper, a charity in Surrey, the prince interacted with staff and received cards of well wishes for his wife and his father, King Charles III, both affected by the disease. In an emotional moment, Guillermo promised to take care of Kate, showing an image of commitment and support. A public commitment, a hidden reality However, sources close to the couple paint a very different reality. Behind this façade of marital support, the marriage between Kate and William appears to be going through serious difficulties. Guillermo apparently shows little interest in his wife's health, delegating all medical responsibilities to staff available 24 hours a day. Meanwhile, he continues to enjoy an active social life, attending parties and nights out with friends and "special friends." Among his regular company is Rose Hanbury, a woman who rumors indicate has been his lover for more than five years. This double life of Guillermo contradicts his promise to look after Kate, who is fighting a devastating illness and needs the support of her partner more than ever. Kate Middleton's loneliness: a heartbreaking reality Kate Middleton's isolation is palpable. During the weekends, while William is away to enjoy his social life, Kate is left alone at home with her three children . This time, which should be rest and family support, becomes a period of loneliness and total responsibility for the princess. At her home, Kate takes refuge in the love of her children, but the lack of marital support aggravates her emotional and physical situation in these difficult times.

The situation is a reflection of a significant gap in their marriage, where the public image of a united couple contrasts drastically with the private reality of disunity and lack of commitment. Kate Middleton, who has always been a figure admired and respected by the British public , faces not only a fight against cancer, but also the loneliness and disappointment of a marriage that seems to be breaking down. Kate and Guillermo's situation has implications that go beyond the personal. The mere suggestion of a divorce would be a monumental blow to the British monarchy. Kate Middleton has managed to win the love and admiration of the British people, evoking the popularity of the late Princess Diana. A divorce could unleash an image crisis for the British Royal Family, generating an incalculable political and social impact.

[unloneliest]

talking about a role swap/somewhat darker au of original leverage with @asterlark & having an absolute ball in this bitch

parker (aka p@rk3r) as a hacker/architect of plans/manipulator of systems. in canon she's already a brilliant mathmatician, and the biggest change in this au is that rather than getting involved with getaway driving/car theft in upper elementary/middle school, she starts learning to code & hack. whether or not she continues her education past middle school, her learning is in her own hands & it's a choice she makes. she's still very isolated and singular, but somewhat less so than in canon—as a hacker, she's somewhat more able to find other people who are strange like her.

hardison as a grifter/fabricator/with some complimentary digital skills, though it's not what he specializes in. he goes by alec in this AU. much like this alternate parker, he just had slightly different formative experiences and landed on a different specialization—the people skills he mentioned learning going door to door with a foster family, his background in theater tech (is that canon?). creating a believable person out of nothing becomes the game for him, and a tool. he connects so well with others in canon, and that's the key unchanging piece here.

eliot as the thief. we see a bit of that with how he presents himself in the pilot as a retrieval specialist—but this eliot would have a big key difference from canon. he comes from a similar background of violence, but he got out before getting too involved with moreau. and that means he trusts his own judgement in a way he doesn't in canon. he trusts himself to discern others' trustworthiness and moral character. this is an eliot who can fight, but chooses not to—not just with guns. he looks, moves and behaves very differently in some ways, but is exactly the same in others. an equally high level of body control and awareness is required of both hitters and thieves, but with different ultimate goals/specifications—different form due to different function.

sophie is annie croy (of the beantown bailout job) in this au, and she's the hitter of the team. she's rougher around the edges, but equally as canny & insightful. she's very commanding; intimidating in the way the canon glimpse of annie croy is. she has canon hardison's grift difficulties as the team comes together—prone to overdoing it—in part because she knows she can just shoot her way out if things go sideways for her. she has none of eliot's qualms with killing, though.

in this AU, nate's not on the team. the treatment was approved for his son, but did not succeed, and he and maggie still divorce. in this AU there's no initiating event to drive nate's moral split from IYS, so there is no split, and one of the things he throws himself into in the aftermath is his work. but there's no one left he's close to who could keep him from crossing lines, the way we see him behave at his worst in canon. the nate of this AU is not a pleasant or good person.

in this AU, the team are somewhat less known to be lone wolves—they almost entirely work alone, but not entirely.

parker, alec and eliot get implicated, framed for the same job, when all of what they'd done was solo and none of them did the big crime that they're accused of. and it's a very out of control nate who's investigating the crime that occurred.

they team up in a just-this-once manner to escape the situation they're in, but when things get worse, they reach out to annie croy to join their crew. and the four of them click in a very unexpected way. they have fun together, and they kick ass. things come very down to the wire with nate, though they do succeed. there is no single mastermind, but the group works together in a much more equal way to plan, and it works.

tentatively, they make plans to work together again, & it settles into a more permanent group—one where they help people, much of the time, but sometimes they just do the ruining rich people's lives part without the "for the hyper specific benefit of individuals harmed by said rich people" part. nate is their biggest running villain.

sterling is the inside guy they have, when that's needed. he's the person nate's closest with at this point in time but nate is even acting in a way that's too much for sterling and it's enough to cause sterling to separate himself somewhat from IYS & occasionally work with the team. none of them still like him, but this time it's just because he's still an insufferable person even if they're in alignment.

ultimately, in this au, annie croy both kills nate & fucks maggie, and she's right for that. i support women's wrongs <3