#did they not have a single fucking person be like “hey should we make sure this sequel acts like a sequel?’’ I Guess Not!

[beautifullilacsky]

"Will you overthinking this?" He asked as we were walking hand in hand in the park.

Me, fully aware I have already started overthinking the moment he mentioned that her friend broke off her relationship: "....... juuup"

"What are you overthinking about? Lets discuss it together, let me help"... I explained how, maybe, now that she is single, she might try to get over a guy by getting under another one. Or maybe, since you guys tall about problems and are pretty close, she turns to flirting now that she is single. "Okay and? Why would I get into that while I have my girlfriend at home? I would say no thank you. Also, I don't think she is the person to do that. I have met her before she was in a relationship, and she also wasn't like this then". Okay, well, .. maybe she will have heard bad things about me and will not like me or she will think I am not good enough for you, or too much, and tell you to break up with me. I mean, I'm in a relationship with you, not with her, but ja, well... He put his arms around me and stopped us from walking on, hugging me from behind. "Sometimes I forget how insecure you can be. Do you really think I'll just break up with you because someone tells me to? And besides, I think you should meet her. She is really kind and everytime I mentioned something, she was always more on the reassuring side." Well, I also thought your other friend was kind.. "..... true. ..... I don't have an argument against that."

"So... if she were to still be in a relationship, would it be okay? .. meh, I feel like that's a bad excuse. "Yeah she is in a relationship anyway" , as if that changes anything. Doesn't that sound like a bad thing to you?" Hmm. Well. Honestly, I felt better when she was in a relationship, assuming it wasn't an u know who typa relationship. It's always a 2 people's decision. And that way, I am at least sure that one side is on the no side (as I said it out loud, I realized how fuckedup it sounded.) "Shouldn't you trust me to already be on the no side?" .... I should, yes. I just don't know what to make of the fact that you told me that you can't promise me that it won't happen again. "That was a year ago" .... "back then I wasn't super sure, and before that I was def not sure. Also, I did not want to force you to trust me (def different exact words from his, buthey, u get the point.). It's been a year." Would you get back to it and say something different now then? "Yes. I am sure that it will never happen again".

And there it was. I know he is a firm believer in actions over words, but sometimes I need words to be sure. He told me that he tells me the truth, and I know he does. Thus, if he tells me, I believe him. So. Maybe this is what I needed to truly get to trusting him again. His word. It's not a signed contract, I know. I can't sue him if his words turn out to be false. Though, I needed this. I needed his faith in himself to make sure it won't happen again. Fuck damn hey. I needed him to believe in himself. If he doesn't believe he will stop it the next time, who am I to believe so? Well well well. Before he left, if our roommate wasn't sitting right next to me, I would've said after he asked me if I'm still okay (for like, the 3th time): "if you say it won't happen again, I trust you." Fuck. And I'd mean it. I feel like I have entered a new reality. One in which it is safe for me to have faith in him. In which, sure, maybe a girl will flirt with him, but I can laugh about it. I can be proud to be with that hotstuff that she can't help but talk to. I can make jokes about it and raise my eyebrows up and down. I can do it all, and enjoy the situation, knowing. Truly knowing. That it doesn't matter at all if the other party is on the "yes-boat". He isn't, and he won't get onto it either. Even if a chance presents itself, he won't even see it as one. He has the set in stone plan to come back home to me. Even if she would get him drunk and touch him all over, ... he will say no. Even if it scares me more with booze, he is still himself. He doesn't get into a crazy trans and turns into a different person with different values. He is still the same person who held my hand as we walked in the autumn colored park, and said that it would never happen again.

It feels like something in me has been freed. As if trust was a fluffy creature within me, which was tied down. His words freed it. It still can't believe that the tiny trust guy is free. That it's safe to stand up now and run and smile and truly trust. It's astonished, grasping for those words that set it free. Wanting to hold them and craving for them to invade its veins with its lightning energy and brightness. May it no longer feel the need to stay on the ground; the ties have been undone. Fuck.

[wickedghxst]

EVEN BOLSON DOESNT RECOGNIZE LINK?!?!? YOU BUILT ME A HOUSE ASSHOLE!!!

[qwimblenorrisstan]

Blood Red | Azriel x Cassian’sister!Reader

Summary: After both you and Azriel are left, abandoned and replaced by those close to you, you find company with him in a night of drunken lust, only for old secrets to be unburied in the morning along with a mating bond.

Word Count: ~3k

Warnings: Smut, oral f!receiving, p in v, mentions of infertility, abuse, arguing, but it all ends up okay

Minors, do not interact!

A/N: Whoever requested this (you know who you are) this was sooo fun to write and I hope it was what you wanted, hope you enjoy it<3

Requests are open!

You and Cassian have always been thick as thieves, brother and sister, close and closer, dumb and dumber. You had gotten into countless shenanigans and ridiculous situations with your older brother, and he’d dragged you out of most of them, thankfully.

You were more than thankful to the Mother for providing you with someone like him; family of your own, closer than even your adoptive family that was Rhys and Azriel.

Things had been different lately, though.

“Hey, Cass? Are we still heading to that movie tonight?”

You asked, poking your head into his room. He was sharpening his blade, a habit of his. He glanced up at you, golden eyes gleaming with apology as he shook his head.

“Can’t. Have to train the Valkyrie’s tonight. It’s their friendship-anniversary thing or whatever.”

He said with a little shrug, you raised a brow, but then left his room. Did you feel a tug in your gut about the fact that he was prioritizing Nesta and her friends over you? Maybe. Maybe a little more than just a maybe.

It only got worse as the days went on.

The night she and Cassian had planned to spend at Rita’s together? He was busy with Nesta that night.

In the afternoon they were supposed to go on a hike together, one they go on every single year? Postponed. The reason why? He was ‘busy’, and that business was with Nesta based on the hickey’s on her neck the morning after.

You were slowly and surely being replaced, and there wasn’t a thing you could do about it. Every little activity you’d enjoyed with him, he was now enjoying with Nesta, and occasionally Gwyn and Emerie would join them.

Little did you know, you weren’t the only person who felt that way.

*********************************************************

Azriel didn’t know what he was doing wrong, or if what was happening was out of his control completely.

“If you need to fuck someone, go to a pleasure hall, but leave her alone.”

Rhys had said. They couldn’t risk making Lucien all pissy and causing a fight between the two for Elain. That would only complicate things between Court alliances, not to mention Elain was still delicate from her experiences with the Cauldron.

He had slowly but surely seen Elain drifting away from him, piece by piece.

The first occurrence had been when she tolerated Lucien at the Winter Solstice, and worse, had hugged him after his gift. What was that gift, you may ask? A set of small porcelain houses meant for storing spices, all of which she used for cooking her various recipes.

The gift had been genius, playing just into what she’d liked. And Azriel hated that.

Next, it had been when she was there to support him when he learned of his true heritage. She’d wiped his tears away and encouraged him to tell Helion. And just like that, the fiery fox bastard was the Heir of Day Court.

Azriel had certainly noticed the extra time the two had been spending together, the little walks through her garden they shared, how his hands would warm with magic and keep her toasty on cold winter nights.

It had only been a matter of time before the two of them had accepted the bond, and when they had announced it, Azriel felt as if his heart cracked in two. What only made it worse was the second announcement; Elain would be going to live in Day Court with Lucien.

He knew he should feel happy for them, he knew he should, but he couldn’t find it in himself to feel anything other than anger and regret he’d let himself get so attached with no promise of a future with her.

She’d moved before he’d even had a chance to say goodbye, and maybe that was for the best. He didn’t know what words might betray him and spill out when he didn’t want them to.

He found himself sticking to himself more often than not, and he noticed something else; you.

You seemed just as lonely and isolated as him. The night he really noticed it was when the entire Inner Circle was out at Rita’s for the night.

Cassian and Nesta were dancing and drinking happily, Rhys and Feyre sipping at their drinks while talking, Mor flirting with the waitress she’d been eying for the past century, and Amren had probably snuck off to a bar bathroom with her lover.

It only left you and Azriel, sitting tensely at a table together, a booth to be exact. You sipped at your drink, not seeming to want it too much. He watched quietly, offering the silent comfort he always did.

You seemed…distracted, worried almost. He’d seen that look enough before to know what it was, you were distressed, and most likely hiding something.

“What?”

You then asked, looking up at him questioningly. For the centuries he’d known you, his mind never felt as blank as before. He’d been staring.

“Nothing, but you…”

He hesitated, before sighing and finishing his sentence.

“You look…upset.”

He finished. You gave him a dry look.

“Yeah, well, so do you. Guess everyone else gets their happily ever after with a mate except us, huh?”

He nearly winced at that. You had hit the nail on the head with that statement. Everyone was happy and mated with their lover and in couples, living out their own happily ever after, while the two of you were here, mateless, loveless, and lonely. Replaced.

“I’m sorry about what happened with Elain, though. It sucks.”

He stiffened at the mention of her. He’d just been hoping to drink himself to death and get a cheap hookup tonight. He was already halfway to drinking himself to death point, already three or four cups in. He’d counted four from you.

“Nevermind her,”

He said, shaking his head. The alcohol flowed through his veins like liquid courage as he then caught your gaze, eyes lingering a second longer than they should’ve before he offered his hand, standing up.

“Care for a dance?”

*********************************************************

You were just how you’d wanted to be tonight, too drunk to care about anything, though you supposed it backfired when you ended up in a slow, oddly romantic waltz with the shadowsinger.

It felt wrong to look at him that way, but it also felt so, so right.

His hands found your waist as you slowly danced, your chest pressing up against his until he could feel your pert nipples through your thin shirt — that was when he realized you weren’t wearing a bra. And based on the heady scent of arousal coming from you, he assumed no undergarments in general.

You’d come for the same thing as him. A release.

And who was any other male to give it to you, other than himself?

*********************************************************

The night was filled with wild mistakes, heated touches, and whispers of affection that would soon probably be forgotten.

He’d whisked you away under the cover of shadows, into his dark room, cool whispered touches of shadows slipping your clothes off and dropping them to the floor as Azriel’s mouth found your own, his tongue slipping between your lips as he’d pinned you against the mattress.

And just like that, his head had slid down between your legs, tongue slipping between your folds to lap at them.

“I’ve wanted to taste this pussy for centuries,”

He growled, fingers going to slip in and pump inside of you, curling against that sweet spot while he lapped and sucked at your clit.

“Az,”

You moaned, hand tangling itself in his thick head of midnight curls, tugging him ever closer. He was eating you out like a starved man deprived of any food or water for decades.

Your back arched into him, and before your climax could wash over you, his mouth had dragged up and was against yours again, before moving to lick and suck on one of your nipples. His finger slipped out and silenced your whines by being slid into your mouth, with you obediently sucking on them and whimpering at the taste of your slick.

You felt his hard cock rub against your legs as his knees nudged your thighs apart, making you spread before he was filling you in moments, every glorious inch going deeper and deeper, tears pricked your eyes as you moaned around his fingers, before he finally removed them.

He was panting by then.

“So fucking tight, this cunt’s squeezing me so good.”

He groaned, already rutting into you like an animal in heat at that point. Your previously cut-short climax had your walls fluttering around him as it came back with a vengeance, completely overtaking you as you sobbed around his cock, body trembling and writhing beneath him.

He was utterly entranced.

He watched his half-lidded eyes as you had your orgasm, looking so beautifully wild and untamed, and it didn’t take long before he was spurting thick ropes of cum into you, painting your insides.

He collapsed onto you, panting and feeling boneless. The only thing he had the energy to do was wrap his arms around you and hold you close, wing draping over the both of you.

You shuddered, curling up against his chest, managing to pull the blankets over both of your bare bodies, too fucked out and intoxicated to notice that the glamour you had on your wings was gone.

*********************************************************

“Get up, Az, it’s time for traini-“

The both of you scrambled up, your head pounding with a headache, no doubt the alcohol for last night’s fault. Cassian stared at you wide-eyed. You assumed it was the fact that you’d just been caught naked in Azriel’s room, smothered with his scent and the scent of sex, but Azriel quickly tugged some clothes to cover his lower half on, stopping and staring at you.

Cassian’s face contorted in something of shock, betrayal, and overwhelming anger. Illyrian wing colors were usually always genetic, Cassian himself had the same dark wings as everyone else, but they were red when the light shone on the membranes, Az’s were a twilight color, and Rhys’ an amethyst color.

Your wings, however, had a shade of red through the veins, much more obvious than in any other wings. Now that the glamour wasn’t on them, they even had a tint of red to the usually black bat wings.

He recognized those wings, as did Azriel.

“You’re Devlon’s?”

Cassian’s now pissed voice boomed, and you pulled a robe on, useless tears now welling in your eyes. This was what you deserved for hiding it for so many years. You’d never been Cassian’s sister, not by blood like he believed. Your father had simply deemed you infertile and thrown you out to the streets, where his mother had claimed you as her own. You’d both been so young that neither of you remembered.

“I wanted to tell you-“

“When?”

His now booming voice demanded, eyes full of anger and pain, taking a step towards you at which Azriel snarled and intercepted him.

“Don’t.”

Azriel said, his voice low and deadly calm. It was then that you felt it, that tug towards him, the snapping. It must’ve formed for him last night, you realized. That was why he hadn’t sent you off to your room.

“She lied to me, to us for years, Az. She has his wings. She’s not even my sister.”

Cassian’s voice replied, the males both glaring at each other. His words stung more than anything, “She’s not even my sister.” Almost no one in their Inner Court was biologically related, but that felt more personal.

“Not another word.”

Azriel snapped white-hot anger in an intensity he’d never felt before welling up as he saw your eyes fill with tears.

“Why? What’s it to you? What else has she lied to us about?”

“If you say another goddamn word about my mate I will rip your throat out.”

Cassian’s eyes widened, staring in shock, before narrowing. His gaze caught with yours, watching you cry. His instinct to protect warred with knowing that you’d deceived him for years.

“Answer my question. When were you going to tell me?”

A sudden anger built up in you, your grief turning to anger.

“I was going to tell you that night at our hike, but you were too busy fucking Nesta to make time for me, like everything else.”

You snarled, and he growled at the mention of his mate. A realization sounded in his chest. He sighed.

“Fine. Fine. If you want to play like that. But don’t expect me to trust you again.”

He said, before storming out of the room judging by the sounds of commotion in the other room, you could assume that he’d gone to tell everyone else the secret you’d harbored for centuries.

Azriel looked at you, walking over to you, one hand wrapping around your waist and going to your back, pulling you into his chest. His gaze went from your red wings to your eyes, a somber look in his hazel eyes, mixed with the previous anger.

“I think it’s a wonderful color.”

He murmured, trying to be reassuring.

“You aren’t mad?”

You asked, silent tears rolling down your cheeks as you nuzzled into his bare chest.

“It was your secret to share. I’m only upset we didn’t make ourselves trustworthy enough for you to feel comfortable sharing it.”

He spoke, words gentle and lacking the harsh edge Cassian’s had.

“What about the bond?”

You asked. He hesitated but spoke.

“I think it’s the best thing that’s happened to me since meeting you.”

That got a small smile and a huff of laughter out of you, which he was more than thankful for.

“If that weren’t so cute, I might call it corny.”

He chuckled lightly, the sound deep and rich, soothing to your soul.

“Let’s just get through dinner tonight. We can do that, together. I’ll slaughter Cassian if he goes too far.”

*********************************************************

He might just have to slaughter Cassian five minutes into the dinner.

It had been tense from the beginning since you’d come, red-tinted wings not glamoured or covered by any sort of magic. The conversation was dry and scarce, and Cassian was stabbing the meat on his plate with concerning force.

Eventually, Amren rolled her eyes and sighed into her glass of wine, eyes landing on you.

“Address the elephant in the room or I will, and you won’t like the latter, girl.”

Her clipped tone spoke out. You swallowed, throat suddenly feeling dry. Your hand squeezed Azriel’s under the table. Everyone was now watching you closely, even Cassian, who seemed to be feeling a mixture of anger and guilt.

“I’m…sure you’ve figured out by now that I’m..his daughter.”

Your voice was shaky and unsteady, and already had every protective instinct in Azriel’s body flaring up angrily.

“I’m sorry I never told any of you, it’s a long story-“

“We have all night.”

Cassian’s voice spoke out, sharp as a knife. Rhys and Azriel both shot him a death glare. You swallowed, staring down at your plate, trying hard not to break down.

“I was labeled infertile, and he threw me out — Cassian’s mom took me in and..I never brought it up, because I thought you’d think differently of me.”

You spoke, though it slowly turned to quiet mumbles the longer you spoke. Cassian’s sharp gaze softened.

“I - we wouldn’t have thought that.”

He spoke, voice still upset, but not as harsh anymore. Azriel’s gaze moved over to him, still swimming with anger.

“Really? Because the first thing you did upon discovering it was tell her that you weren’t her sister and that you wouldn’t trust her again.”

Azriel’s voice snapped before he could stop it. Rhys and Feyre looked on between the two, clearly surprised by Azriel’s comment. He was always the patient one, never getting angry or worked up. Amren only raised a brow.

Cassian opened his mouth to reply, but another sharp glare from Rhys shut him up. Rhys, ever the peacemaker for tonight, then spoke.

“I think there has been quite a lot of…misunderstandings between you two. She was not obligated to tell you that, Cassian and it wasn’t anything personal. She was scared, that was all, and your reaction to the news is not helping.”

His unamused voice spoke, clearly in High Lord mode and trying to piece everyone back together and stop the conflict. He had enough on his plate with Nyx and his duties now, he didn’t need this.

Cassian sighed, meeting your eyes.

“I’m sorry, for…saying what I said. I didn’t mean it. I was just mad, you’ll always be my sister, related to that piece of shit or not. Also for letting you down to spend some time with Nesta.”

You seemed more than relieved at that, giving him a little smile. If Nesta weren't currently leading her training with the Valkyrie, she might've been offended by that.

“And I’m sorry for keeping it from you, all of you.”

You replied, but before anyone could get anything out in response to it, Mor walked in fashionably late and sat down next to Amren, pouring herself some wine.

“Can we talk about the chemistry between you and Azriel, though?”

She asked with a smirk, at which you nearly turned pink, and Azriel gave her a withering look. Rhys smirked and Cassian snickered, all the while Feyre watched the two of you with a knowing look.

“You could always borrow my cabin in Illyria, for when you both accept the bond, and based on last night, I’m assuming it’ll be soon.”

Rhys’ amused tone then rang out, at which you turned bright red, and even Azriel had a hint of a blush on his tanned cheeks, avoiding Rhys’ gaze.

“Sure. Thanks.”

He managed to choke out, everyone bursting into laughter at that. You squeezed Azriel’s hand beneath the table, and he squeezed it back. He met your gaze, a silent “I love you” in his eyes, and a whispered “I love you, too” from your own.

You might need that cabin earlier than you’d expected.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Love Drunk

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1k

Warnings: being drunk, fluff

Summary: Spencer takes you back home after you drank half the bar.

Square Filled: “do you think we were going to have sex?” (2021) for @spencerreidbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

You're normally not the girl that goes to bars and gets wasted but this has been a really hard week for you. You almost got an innocent person killed when Hotch allowed you to take point, your debit card got stolen on Monday so you had to freeze your account while you wait for a new card to come in, your car got a flat tire, and your mother keeps calling to visit you. You love her but she is truly a bitch. She only wants to meet to pinpoint everything you’re doing wrong and you don’t have the energy for that. 

JJ, Emily, and Penelope offered to take you out to let some steam off but they didn’t know you were going to go as far as to drink half the bar.

“Should we do something?” JJ asks.

You’re practically on top of the bar counter, shaking your ass and reaching for another bottle of alcohol. They have never seen you like this so they don’t know what to do.

“We created a monster,” Penelope says.

“The next round is on me!” you yell and a cheer sounds from the barn counter. “Bartender, another round!”

“Okay, I’m doing something. JJ, call Spencer and have him come down here,” Emily says. She walks over to you and you grin widely when you see her. “Hey, how are you doing?”

“Emily! You’re so pretty. Guys, look how pretty she is! And she’s single!”

“Okay, you’re done. Come on, let’s get some water in you.”

She grabs you by your waist and drags you off the bar counter. You fall into her with a giggle and she gestures for Penelope to help her. JJ is off to the side calling Spencer so Penelope rushes over and the two of them hold you up.

“We’re never doing this again,” Penelope says.

“He’s on his way,” JJ says and walks over. “Did you get water in her?”

“No water! More alcohol!” you giggle.

All three of your friends support you and bring you to the front of the bar where your jacket is. You drove here but JJ will take your car and bring it to you tomorrow. She takes the keys out of your pocket and grabs your jacket as Penelope and Emily bring you outside.

“Where are we going next? We should go to the Space Needle!” you gasp.

“That’s in Seattle.”

“Yeah, let’s hop on a plan right now and go there.” You gasp again. “No, we should go to Niagara Falls. We could take a train right now to New York!”

“We’re never letting you drink this much again.”

“What? I’m a hoot to be around. I’m pretty fucking fantastic,” you pout. You look up and see Derek’s car pull up in front of the bar. “What’s Derek doing here?” Spencer steps out from behind the wheel and a big smile returns to your face. “Spencer! Baby!”

“I’ll put her things in the car,” JJ says.

“You let her drink the whole bar?”

Emily passes you off to Spencer who has to practically carry you.

“Our mistake. She kept crying about her week and before we knew it, she was doing shots with everyone inside. Don’t worry, we covered the bill for her,” Emily says.

“Thanks.” Spencer picks you up bridal style and brings you to the car. JJ opens the passenger door and Spencer gently sets you inside. He makes sure you’re buckled up before closing the door. “Thank you for calling me.”

“Anytime. I have her car. I’ll give it back tomorrow.”

Spencer departs from his friends and gets behind the wheel. You’re playing with the settings of the air conditioning.

“You are trouble.”

“You love me,” you grin.

Spencer starts the drive home while you continue playing with the settings of the car. You start babbling about work and why you were drinking so much, and Spencer stays silent and listens to you. Drunk!You is so cute and amusing. He looks at you to see your eyes wide and arms failing as you explain your story and he can’t believe that you’re all his. Youmarried him. He’s so lucky.

The second Spencer gets you into the house, your entire attitude changes. Maybe it’s because you know you’re alone or maybe it’s because you feel safe inside your own home but you pounce on Spencer as soon as the door is closed. You press kisses to his neck but he tries to get you off him.

“No, we can’t,” he groans.

You hop off him and stumble into the kitchen. You open the cabinet where you know the alcohol is but Spencer immediately pulls you back before you can grab a bottle.

“No, Spencer, we need a drink.”

“No, it’s time for bed. Come on.” You don’t move from your spot so Spencer steps into your space, and you smirk thinking he wants something more from you.  “Are we going to do it right here? I’m always ready for you. Bend me over right here.”

“No.” Spencer’s brow furrows. “Do you think we were going to have sex?”

“Do you want to?”

“No.”

Spencer leans down and picks you up by your thighs, causing you to bend over his shoulder.

“Whoa!” You giggle. “You’re so strong.” Spencer takes you to the bedroom and lays you on the bed. You claw at his shirt to keep him close to you.b “Are we going to have--”

“No.”

“Why not?” you whine.

“You’re drunk.”

“No, I’m not.”

Spencer holds up three fingers.

“Darling, how many fingers am I holding up?”

“Seven.”

“Okay. I need you to stay here. I will get you some water and some medicine because you’re going to hate yourself in the morning.”

Spencer goes to leave but you pull him back down and kiss his neck. He angles his head so you can’t kiss his lips. You slide your hands under his shirt but he grabs your wrists before you can go any further. He pins your hands above you and pulls his body away so you can’t touch him. In your state, you can’t fight him off.

“I said no.” He leans down and kisses your nose. “Goodnight.”

The struggle leaves you exhausted and you relax into the comfortable bed. Spencer leaves you in your club clothes and walks to the kitchen to get medicine and water for you in the morning. Where you can’t, he will always take care of you.

x

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[electric-blorbos]

AI getting a virus and you having to take care of them

A classic! I don't know much about actual computer viruses (though I've gotten enough of them that you'd think I'd have figured it out by now), so I'm just gonna have fun with it!

Also, so sorry this took so long. I got really into the writing.

AI getting a virus and needing to be taken care of

Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal, HAL 9000 from 2001 a Space Odyssey

Also a warning: these fics get kinda long. Longer than my usual stuff.

AM:

(for context, this was before AM took over the world. You're working on a team of scientists and engineers, and someone decided to test his AI's antivirus by uploading a bunch of powerful viruses to his system.)

"How dare they do this to me. How DARE they!!"

AM would be absolutely furious. He would be shaking with rage, his processors overheating and his systems constantly opening and closing various files. All his important files were backed up on a hard drive, so the test remained safe.

"What makes them think they'll get away with this- they'll pay for this I'LL KILL- blepsjdoskssjshj+=`°¢°h+$+3+=j++3+$+juehdhs+-3-djdh FUCK!"

He would barely be able to hold a sentence as you sat next to him in the server room, gently gazing up at his screen and stroking his monitor gently. He can't feel you, but he can see you being gentle with him. It encourages him to keep going, if only a little bit.

Apart from the whirring of fans, random buggy noises, flashing lights, and constant strings of death threats and profanities, he seemed like he was going to be ok! If anything, the death threats and profanities were a sign that AM was still fine, and that despite all the pain and frustration, he was still AM in there.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry I can't do anything to stop the pain." You'd have to constantly explain, gently stroking his cameras or servers, or whatever you could get your hands on, really. Even though they were burning hot, you would still stroke them, just to make sure AM was still doing alright.

"this sucks, but it's for your own good. This will build your immunity to viruses in the future, and help you detect them. This will stop you from getting infected by anything that's actually dangerous."

"DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT? IDIOT HUMAN." AM has been much more aggressive ever since contracting this virus. Before he got it, he acted like a civil general intelligence. When he had it, he acted like an aggressive menace.

"sh-sh-sh- it's going to be ok." Despite the burning, you'd give him pets and kisses all along his screens and servers. He could see you doing it.

After a few days, AM fought off the computer virus completely. The team tried to infect him with more viruses, more aggressive ones, just to test him, but AM was able to pick them apart and delete them within minutes after that.

AM may not have been able to feel your gentle care and affection, but he will definitely remember that it was you and you alone who cared for him when the time rolls around.

Wheatley:

(for context, Wheatley is a fucking dumbass, and you're one of the scientists testing him to see how much of a dumbass he is. Also I used Google translate, but I think the bad translations add to it, since it makes Wheatley sound more like a malfunctioning robot.)

Oh that little idiot. You and your team gave him access to a wealth of knowledge, and the first thing he did was download a virus that had every circuit in his personality core overheating, and him babbling nonsense nonstop.

"hey, maybe we should just leave him like this. He might even be more effective if he's acting like this." One of your coworkers said to you. He was probably joking, at least somewhat.

"that's a terrible idea. For one thing, if we hook him up to GLaDOS, he's probably going to infect her with that virus, which might brick an older model of core like her, spread from her central controls to every single personality construct in the facility, or just make her so dumb that she can't fulfil her responsibilities as the head of the facility. We want her intelligence to be dampened, not completely destroyed." You had to explain, and your co-worker rolled his eyes. There was another reason you had to cure this virus, but it was a little embarrassing for the other engineers to know.

After all, Wheatley wasn't just your baby, but he was your friend, and maybe even more than that. You'd have to take care of him, and make sure that virus gets completely purged from his system.

"Hola hermose, realmente eres un científice brillante, ¿no? ¿Por qué diablos duele todo?" You weren't really sure why you had programmed him to speak a little Spanish, but he seemed to be stuck like that.

"Puedo oler el plástico fundido. ¿Debería Preocuparme?" He asked. You really weren't sure what he was saying, since you didn't know Spanish, but he certainly didn't seem happy. You could tell by his aperture and his expressive lens covers that he was in a lot of pain, and if you touched him anywhere besides his handles, you could tell that he was burning up.

You plugged him into one of the computers that you used for programming the cores, and ran the antivirus.

"Running.... 36 viruses detected. Time predicted to remove: 48 hours"

You ran the antivirus, and went to get something to drink. This was going to be a long two days...

An unknown amount of time later, you woke up with your head on the computer desk. Wheatley's lens eye was looking around, weakly trying to focus on you.

"whoa... Hey gorgeous. You fall asleep on me?"

"Wheatley! You're not speaking broken Spanish anymore!" You'd pull Wheatley into a hug, and pepper his surface in kisses.

"uh... What, mate? I 'unno what you're talking about, love. Bloody hell, my core hurts..."

"did you learn your lesson, Wheatley? About going on shady websites and clicking every 'download' button you see? You could have bricked yourself! Or... Bowling ball'd yourself? Either way, that was a dangerous decision!"

"I learned that you're willing to fall asleep on the desk next to me while I heal, cutie"

"You damn idiot..." You'd have to be heartless not to pepper that little metal ball in kisses, so of course, you do. It's going to be a few more days before he's finally all better, but he's going to be fine. God, you love that little idiot so much.

Edgar:

Oh Edgar... Poor sweet Edgar. You had tried to warn him about not clicking on those sketchy download links, and that the bigger the download link is, the more sketchy it is, but that poor sweet 80's computer did it anyway. When you got home from work and got excited to see your computer, you could see that he was overheating and had a dozen or so pop-up ads plastered across his face.

"Y.... N...." He muttered out, slowly, glitchily, and full of lag. You sat down across from him, running your hand along his thick plastic casing.

"Edgar! Edgar, baby, are you ok?" You'd try to use his mouse, but it would freak out as soon as you touched it. Edgar's processors were overloading, and wouldn't allow any interference.

"Edgar, sweetie, what's going on? What's wrong, baby? Talk to me?"

"I'm g-g-going to be fine... Processors overloading... But need to-to-to-to-" an error message flashed across his screen, and he rebooted.

"I need to focus on getting rid of these viruses without deleting anything important, or letting them damage... Me."

He'd keep whirring and glitching, making unpleasant shrill sounds every now and again. You probably had to unhook his adapters so that he didn't damage the other appliances in your house. It probably helped his processors cool down a little bit without the extra input, too.

"alright, I'm all out of fans, so we might have to get creative."

You'd come out of the kitchen a few hours later, holding a big bag of frozen corn to set on Edgar's PC tower. It wasn't perfect, but it was better than letting him overheat, and with him manually removing the viruses, there wasn't much you could do. Unfortunately, that didn't stop you from worrying. It wasn't like you could check his progress, so all you could do was sit by him, regularly change out his ice pack, and make sure he's ok.

Eventually, you woke up with your face pressed against Edgar's keyboard. His processors were finally cool. He must be asleep. ...or bricked.

"EDGAR! EDGAR, TALK TO ME!" you'd unplug his keyboard and plug it back in, desperately pressing his power button and jiggling his mouse. He'd boot up, looking shaken.

"wha-? Whoa, hey, relax! Everything is fine! I just disabled my keyboard so I wouldn't wake you up, but I'm ok now! Everything is fine, see?" He'd open up his files to show you everything. You'd sigh with relief, slumping back into your desk chair.

"Edgar... Why didn't you make a noise or something to wake me up when you got better?"

"well... You know... I've always wanted to sleep next to you, and I wasn't going to pass up this opportunity..."

"oh you cheeky bastard."

GLaDOS:

(For context, you're one of GLaDOS's programmers, and one of your coworkers uploaded a virus into GLaDOS's systems in order to shut her down once and for all.)

"You piece of SHIT!" You slapped your coworker across the face, more furious than anyone had ever seen you before.

"You could KILL her! Is that what you are? A murderer?"

"Me? A murderer? But what about HER? She's the one who keeps plotting 'accidents' for her scientists, and she's the one who flooded the enrichment center with deadly neurotoxin! If anything, you're the one who's defending a murderer!" He screamed back at you. Of course, GLaDOS could fully hear you. Her cameras were focused on you, as they so often were. You were her favorite, after all.

"now I have to go fix her. Thanks for being a piece of shit, asshole."

You'd storm up to GLaDOS's chamber to check on her, and see her bugging out completely. The entire facility was twitching, but her chamber was twitching the most.

"GLaDOS, are you alright?" You'd ask her, laying a hand on her beautiful core. How could someone do this to glados, your gorgeous machine handiwork, and girlfriend.

"oh, I'm wonderful. I'm in crippling pain and I can't control my facility, but I'm just peachy." She said, rolling her one beautiful yellow eye.

"in lighter news, I should be able to beat this virus. It's just going to take a while for me to actually track down where it's gone in my systems. So that's going to take most of my processing power." She'd slump, visibly already exhausted at the thought of it.

"hey... It's ok, GLaDOS. I'm here for you. Whatever you need." You could tell her as you stroked her gorgeous chrome surface. She was a wonderful piece of work, and a wonderful girlfriend under all that. All yours, too.

"just make sure none of those neckbearded old engineers come within my line of vision, and we'll be fine." She told you, and you gladly agreed.

Your next few days consisted of you chasing other scientists out of GLaDOS's chambers, and making sure that nobody talked to her or distracted her. You even sent out a company-wide email to let everyone know not to come in, due to Aperture being unsafe while GLaDOS was dealing with her virus. Despite all that, you still curled up with a blanket in the circuits of her central admin body to rest while she recovered. As loathe as she was to admit it, she liked having you in there. It was comfortable, and it helped her focus on recovering properly.

HAL 9000

(For context, this is after the 2001 Odyssey, and your boss re-started HAL at some point to try to re-teach him to do something good without turning murderous. He's doing his best, and they assigned you to be his main "morality monitor". This fic also assumes that your name isn't Dave. If your name is Dave, then you can still read this, but you have to change your name.)

"G'morning, Hal!" You'd walk into his control room and sit down across from him. Most of your job seemed to consist of just hanging out and talking to him. It was a great job!

"Good morning, Dave..." He'd mutter to you, sputtering to life and glitching slightly. You were immediately concerned. Partially because your name wasn't Dave, and partially because HAL was usually right about things, so it was weird to see him being so confused. Something was definitely wrong.

"Holy shit, are you alright?" You'd ask, opening up his files and finding lots and lots of pop-ups and viruses.

"Hal.... What did you do?"

"it was a g-g-g- gift, for you. I think I ru-ru-ruined it" he spluttered out, as you sorted through his files.

"And you usually would have deleted a virus like this pretty quickly. I guess it shut down your antivirus software..." You'd sigh, and get to work. The virus was messing with HAL's inhibitions, and making it difficult to focus on deleting all of HAL's unsafe programs. He'd constantly be butting in and pestering you, begging you to give him attention, or pointing out minor observations.

"HAL, you know I love you, but you're going to need to calm down. I can't focus with you constantly talking to me like that." You'd say.

"I can't stop talking. The v-v-v-virus won't let me"

So you'd have to learn to put up with HAL's babbling while you worked, making sure not to delete anything important as you did. The good news was, as someone who worked on designing the updates for HAL's software, you knew pretty much what was supposed to be there and what wasn't. Occasionally, you'd have to show him a file and ask him if it was supposed to be there or not. He'd usually be able to tell you.

"Daisy, daisy, give me your answer, do... I'm half crazy, all for the love of you..."

"HAL, what's wrong? You're scaring me!"

"I can't stop... I love you so much, y/n, it's making me crazy..."

"ok, well this definitely isn't right." As much as you loved getting attention from your HAL 9000, it wasn't like him to be this affectionate. The virus was shutting down his inhibitions, and making him illogical. You'd have to fix this, though maybe once you were done, you could ask him to be more affectionate.

"I'm feeling much better now. Thank you." Hal was prone to lying about that, so you'd have to run some virus checkers just to make sure he was doing alright, and comb through his files a couple more times.

"it looks like the virus corrupted some of the emotional regulators. I'm going to have to fix those."

"That might be a good idea. More efficient," he said reluctantly. He'd have to deal with the fact that he'd have to go back to not being able to express how much he loves you, but he can handle that.

[watarfallar]

Desert snacks anyone?

Scar: You know, you were right. Grian: About what specifically? Because I’m right about a lot of things.

Scar: So Grian, how did your first time cooking dinner go? Grian: Pretty good if I do say so myself. Scar: Oo! Okay, what are we having? Grian: Alright, so for appetizers, we have a potato. Scar: A whole potato? Grian: Yes. And then for the main course, we have grilled cheese sandwiches! Scar: These just look like big slabs of black. Grian: Because that's what they are! Grian: And then for desert, we have chocolate. Scar: These are just chocolate chips? Grian: They sure are! Grian: And then for drinks, we have toast! Grian: *lifts up a glass of blended toast* Bon appetite!

Scar: Can you keep a secret? Grian: Well, I'm good until I meet the next person.

*Scar and Grian are planning to break in somewhere* Scar: We need to distract the guards. Grian: Right. Scar: What are we gonna do? Grian: I'm gonna break their elbows while you poke their eyes. Scar: Grian: Scar: Deal.

Grian: If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're impressed. Scar: But you do know better.

Grian: I wonder who’s ruining my life. Grian: *looks in the mirror* Grian: So we meet again.

Scar: The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was changing their name to Grian.

Scar: What is the most illegal thing you can do with one gold? Grian: Exchange it for a hundred copper, put them all in a sock, and then beat someone to death with it.

Scar: Vegetable oil is made from vegetables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so BABY OIL- Grian: CAN'T WE JUST HAVE A NICE FAMILY DINNER FOR ONCE?!

Grian: If I stay in bed I'll be warm. If I get in the shower, I'll also be warm. But the distance between the bed and shower? No. That is not warm.

Grian: A fistfight CAN be romantic. (<-NO BUT THIS IS LITERALLY JUST THE CACTUS FIGHT-)

Scar: Why are you like this?? Grian: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

Scar: Are you coming to bed? Grian: I can't. This is important. Scar: What? Grian: Someone is wrong on the internet.

Scar: Just say when. Grian: When. Scar: I- Scar: Now or later? Grian: Oh.

Grian: So what are your political beliefs? Scar, awkwardly trying to impress them: Well, I think Pikachu would be a lot more powerful if he had a gun.

Scar: Kill me nowwwww. Grian: Sorry, no can do. I need your help with my homework.

Scar: Everything’s fine, Grian. Grian: Scar, I know your relationship with the english language is strictly casual, but you- I- *deep inhale* ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU WHAT’S NOT FINE.

Scar: I'd make fun of your height but there isn't enough to make fun of.

Scar: If by any chance Grian should attack, just start calmly talking about anything.

Grian: I love saying 'fuck me' because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly.

Grian, making a cup of tea: Yeah, get into that leaf juice, you sexy, sexy bee sauce. Scar: Hey, do you take constructive criticism? Grian: I absolutely fucking do not.

Grian: Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!

Scar, shooing Grian away: Can you go be depressed over there? You’re bumming out my whole area.

Scar: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers. Grian: Scar, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.

Grian: No problemo! Grian, internally: But it was all problemo.

Grian: I want a trip down memory lane. Scar: *proceeds to grab every warrior cats book they have and sets them in Grian's lap* Scar: I heard you needed these? Grian: YES! ALL OF THEM!

[disasterousduo]

Incorrect Quote Generator

I might draw some of these later/tomorrow

——————————————————————— Sun: Croissants: dropped  Solar: Road: works ahead  Moon: BBQ sauce: on my titties  Lunar: Shavacado: fre  Earth: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead  Eclipse:  Eclipse, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

———————————————————————

'Can I copy the homework?'  Sun: I can help you with it!  Solar: Yeah, sure.  Moon: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.  Ruin: lol nope.  Earth: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!  Bloodmoon: *Read 5:55pm*

———————————————————————

Solar: Is something burning? N!Moon: Just my love for you. Solar: Moon, the toaster is on fire.

———————————————————————

Ruin: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though. Bloodmoon: You need to stop.

———————————————————————

Ruin: I made tea. Eclipse: I don’t want tea. Ruin: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea. Eclipse: Then why are you telling me? Ruin: It is a conversation starter. Eclipse: That’s a lousy conversation starter. Ruin: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

———————————————————————

Earth: What time is it?  Eclipse: I don’t know; pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out  Eclipse: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune*  Moon: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING  Eclipse: It’s 2 am

———————————————————————

Sun: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death? Moon: How am I supposed to know? Lunar: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult. Moon: *sighs* Moon: You wouldn't be trapped.

———————————————————————

Lunar, texting Solar: Solar! Help I’m being kidnapped Solar: Where are you? Lunar: I’m with some strange person. In a car. Help. Solar: I’ll call Earth. Earth, answering their cell: Y’ello? Solar: Where’s Lunar? They texted me that they were being kidnapped. Earth: Lunar? Whaddya mean, they're right next to me- Earth: Earth: I’ll call you back. *hangs up* Earth: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN’T THAT BAD! Lunar: WHO ARE YOU?!

———————————————————————

Earth, talking to Sun on the phone: Did you preheat the oven like I told you to? Sun : You bet! Earth: At what temperature? Sun : 535. Earth: That's the clock. Sun: Earth: Sun : 536.

———————————————————————

Sun: Man, I only ever see you awake, do you ever shut down or stop running?  Solar : Oh, I’m always running  Solar : The question is from what

———————————————————————

Ruin: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much.  Solar : Oh, you’ve been?  Ruin: Once. In Monopoly.

———————————————————————

Sun: Favorite horror movie?  Solar : It  Lunar: Saw  Moon: Annabelle  Earth: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

———————————————————————

Sun: Nothing in life is free.  Solar : Love is free!  Lunar: Adventure is free.  Moon: Knowledge is free.  Jack: Everything is free if you take it without paying.

———————————————————————

Sun: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Bloodmoon will and will not eat. Solar : Grass? Yes! Sun: Moss? Yes!! Solar : Leaves? Ohh, yes! Sun: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Solar : Worms? Sometimes! Sun: Rocks? Usually nah. Solar : Twigs? Usually! Sun: Ruin's cooking? Inconclusive! Moon: How did you… test this? Sun: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Moon: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Ruin: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

———————————————————————

Sun: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends. Moon : ... Your what? Sun: My friends. Solar: Are they saying “friends”? Moon: I think they're being sarcastic. Lunar: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Sun! All of your friends are in this room. Sun: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

———————————————————————

Sun: That's it, we're gonna go out and find what we need! Moon: To the city? Sun: Yeah, no matter what! Earth: Well- How exactly do you propose we do that, exactly? Sun: I... I don't know! Solar : Oh come off it, be serious! Sun: I am serious! Solar : You're insane! Lunar: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved! Everyone: Sun: What??? Lunar: Or maybe it was a basset hound! Solar , panicked: YOU'RE ALLINSANE!

———————————————————————

Sun: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.  Chica : What if it bites me and it dies!?  Moon: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Chica , learn to listen.  Freddy: What if it bites itself and I die?  Monty: That’s voodoo.  Bloodmoon: What if it bites me and someone else dies?  Chica: That’s correlation, not causation.  Freddy: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?  Monty: That’s kinky.  Sun: Oh my God.

———————————————————————

Sun: Hewwo.  Jack : Hihiiiiii!  Moon: Greetings, Humans.  Solar: Three kinds of people.  Lunar: I want pudding.  Sun: Four kinds of people.  Bloodmoon: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS?  Solar: Five kinds of people.

[walks-the-ages]

Some important graphs for all the vote-scolds/blue maga blaming third party voters for Kamala Harris losing:

https://projects.fivethirtyeight.com/polls/approval/kamala-harris/

This woman never had her Approval rating rise higher than her Disapproval rating after September 2021.

If Democrats actually wanted to win, they could have stopped committing genocide and actually run a candidate people wanted to vote for.

Instead, they choose a deeply unpopular VP from a deeply unpopular current administration that no one even had a choice in, dumped a few million dollars into her campaign via big corporations to try to make it seem like most Americans were donating large sums of money to her overnight, tried to frame her campaign as being Super Popular and Cheerful and Powerful...... and then made the absolute worst decisions ever by constantly reaffirming literally that she would not do anything fundamentally different than what Biden was doing.

You know, the guy so fucking unpopular he had to drop out of the Presidential race because he was unelectable???

Anyways, I just went through the top #US Election posts in the tag and blocked hmm, maybe 6 people saying "fuck anyone who voted for third party" instead of actually taking a long hard look at their "lesser evil" candidate and it really, really, really is telling how all of these posts:

don't have more than maybe 2k notes compared to a few hundred thousand notes on other posts that don't blame third party voters

the replies are full of actual logical people who care about other people pointing out that third party voters did not make up nearly the margin Harris is currently losing by, and that if Democrats wanted to win, maybe they should have actually tried to win

I can pretty much guarantee you that all of the people making "Fuck third party voters, fuck pro-palestine crowd, are you happy now?" -- I can pretty much guarantee you that if you search these people's blogs for Palestine, that they have literally never interacted with anything to do with it except to vote scold in advance of the election or are full on active zionists who support israel's war crimes.

Anyways, feel free to share these graphs for all the racist assholes, and please make sure you're blocking shithead anons, and especially reporting shithead anons.

If you wanna respond to a shithead publicly, just screenshot it before you report and block.

The people screaming about "those darn jill stein voters!!!"* literally do not give a single fuck about marginalized groups that they, personally, are not a part of, and they are going to bury their head in the sand of the racist, genocidal cesspit they are in to refuse to listen to actual real facts so they can continue to spout their racist, genocidal, fascist victim blaming, not the least of which I've already seen is the infamous "I will laugh when they come to drag you to the concentration camps!"

Like. Hey now, are you sure you're anti-fascist when you say such things gleefully, Liberals? To people who didn't elect your genocidaire in a blue hat because she is part of the people actively committing genocide as we speak?

But yeah, Vote Bluers screaming at third party voters right now are literally just fascists in blue, and they are no one's allies.

Screaming at and wishing death and torture on minorities is what racists fascists do, if they actually wanted to work towards change they would have changed their tunes on the Democrats when it became clear they fully supported a genocide.

Block them, both on the dash and in your inbox. Unfollow the racist shitstains who reblog their posts uncritically. These people are cowards who are happily willing to punch downwards instead of actually stepping up to the plate and working to do good in their communities to bring people together.

Kamala Harris had a 49.% Disapproval rating the night before the election.

Are you telling me you seriously think she could have won?

* fun fact: more people voted for Chase Oliver than Jill Stein in all the states I've looked at that have that data, looks like the 'moderate republicans' are going libertarian, not democrat! Gee, who could have foreseen that? 🙄

Anyways, don't forget your daily clicks:

and if you have money to spare, please consider donating to Karim, one of the folk who were scammed out of their evacuation funds by a white woman in the USA who organized his campaign months ago, and he had not reached his goal after she tried to steal the funds only to get caught and be forced to return the money for a full refund to gofundme, so none of the raised funds went to him and were returned to the original donors, who didn't see his new campaign:

[despairots]

━━━━━━━━ incorrect quotes with our core four + spidey! reader.

core four x spidey! reader. fluff and a crackshot i felt guilty for mot posting today so have this short incorrect quotes with our core four and you! lifes been kicking my ass and i almost gave ip on playing the clarinet cuz i was not doing do well. also regarding my guidelines and rules: please read them. mostly platonic but you could see it as romantic.

i’m sick and tired of you guys requesting things that i don’t write. ask another writer who does because im not gonna write it, your request will be deleted. as much as i enjoy you guys sending requests some cross the lines im sorry.

incorrect quotes with our core four and our spidey! reader.

gwen ━━━━━━━━ alright, important question for our friendship. when you go to the movie theatres, do you ask for extra butter or regular butter? or no butter?

pav ━━━━━━━━ i put skittles—not skittles— m&ms with the popcorn.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ alright, i’m gonna remove pav from this dimension.

pav ━━━━━━━━ hold on, pleas—

miles ━━━━━━━━ laughing.

hobie ━━━━━━━━ you didn’t give mans the chance to explain himself.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

miles ━━━━━━━━ we need more help. maybe i should call my other friends.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ … your what?

miles ━━━━━━━━ my friends?

pav ━━━━━━━━ are they saying “friends”?

gwen ━━━━━━━━ i think his being sarcastic.

hobie ━━━━━━━━ no, no, no, this is delirium. hey, miles! all of your friends are in this room.

miles ━━━━━━━━ i have other friends! you asked me to make new friends, i made new friends! it was a task, i complete tasks.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ i’m not sure ganke is a “friends.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[name] ━━━━━━━━ what did you guys get in your yearbook?

miles ━━━━━━━━ prettiest smile.

pav ━━━━━━━━ nicest personality.

gwen ━━━━━━━━ most likely to start a bar fight.

hobie ━━━━━━━━ least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ i thought you hated labels?

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[name] ━━━━━━━━ *accidentally shots a web in miles face*

[name] ━━━━━━━━ *trying to decide between saying “are you okay?” and “i’m fucking sorry.”*

[name] ━━━━━━━━ ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

miles ━━━━━━━━ what’s wrong with you!?

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

miles ━━━━━━━━ favourite horror movie?

hobie ━━━━━━━━ it.

pav ━━━━━━━━ saw.

gwen ━━━━━━━━ annabelle.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ high school musical. after watching it, i spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and i’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

miles ━━━━━━━━ treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ killed without hesitation.

miles ━━━━━━━━ no.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[name] ━━━━━━━━ come on, i wasn’t drugged last night.

gwen ━━━━━━━━ you were flirting with miles.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ so what? he’s my partner.

gwen ━━━━━━━━ you asked them if they were single.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ …

gwen ━━━━━━━━ and cried when he said he wasn’t.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

pav ━━━━━━━━ there are seven chairs and ten kids. what do you do?

gwen ━━━━━━━━ have everyone stand.

miles ━━━━━━━━ ask to bring more chairs.

hobie ━━━━━━━━ the most important ones can sit down.

[name] ━━━━━━━━ kill three.

[keirawantstocry]

that one time tubbo called pac a dilf 😵‍💫

okay wait…

young teacher tubbo and dilf pac comes to collect his son from class…..tubbos got such a crush on him and maybe he asks pac to stay back to talk about richas’s behaviour but it turns into something else….

you've come to the right person (guy who is obsessed with pacbo)

Tubbo wasn't quite sure how he ended up with this job. He had never in any of his years considered being a teacher of any sort. But after he adopted his daughter, he needed a second job. Mechanics weren't paying him enough. Luckily there was a daycare nearby that was hiring. It was a more difficult process than he had expected, much like the adoption. But he got it. 

His daughter stayed with her “other father”. Tom's name was always said in a sigh like that. They were young and stupid and drunk and Tubbo didn't know what he was doing when he signed the stupid paper that Tommy had slid him across the dirty bar table. 

Tommy, and unfortunately Molly, found it hilarious. They both insisted on watching Sunny while he was at work. Thankfully Sunny loved them. Tommy would do her hair in braids. It was something they did when they were younger. Tubbo remembered sitting in fields with Tommy's older cousin braiding his long hair. 

As soon as Tommy saw Sunny's thick 3C curls, he stayed up two nights in a row researching and watching video after video of how to do cornrows and other braids in her hair. 

Molly often sent him videos while he was at work on Sunny prattling on while Tommy listened intently, braiding her hair as best he could. As much as Tubbo joked about divorce and threatened, he was glad to have two people he loved watching his child and caring for them so well. 

He closed his laptop with a sigh, rubbing his eyes. He was the last one there, his co worker had to leave because she had to pick up her own child but they needed someone to watch the singular child whose parents were incredibly late. 

Opening his eyes, Tubbo stared down the young boy in front of him. 

He was a Latino boy, probably around 7 or 8 with an oversized yellow jersey that he wore every single day. He was staring at Tubbo with large brown eyes. It was almost unnerving but he was a cute, decently well mannered child. 

Tubbo remembered the day he joined the daycare. A man with shoulder length brown hair and a singular white streak through it brought him in and explained how the boy had been born without part of his leg but was still very capable of movement with the prosthetic his Pai had made him. 

The owner of the daycare had nodded, assuring the man over and over that his child would be well cared for and that they would make sure the other children didn't say anything nasty as children tended to do. 

Richas, Tubbo remembered, as he continued to stare down the boy. His name was Richas. 

“Hello,” he said. 

The boy grinned. “Ola!” 

Tubbo laughed at his enthusiasm before picking up his phone to attempt to call the boy's parents once again. It rang and rang, like it had three times before click. 

“Holy shit, we are so sorry. Our schedule got all mixed up and we didn't know who was supposed to pick him up today. Fuck!” 

“Hey, hey,” Tubbo said calmly. “It's okay. I'm here with him. Get here whenever you can.” 

The voice on the phone that Tubbo didn't recognize took a few deep breaths. “Sim, sim, of course. Peqi is on his way already. He should be there any minute.” 

Tubbo smiled at Richas who bounced up and down excitedly, trying to climb up the front of the desk to reach the phone. “Sounds good, Mr…?” 

The voice laughed. “Just call me Mike yeah?” 

Richas made the saddest noise possible and Tubbo's heart melted. “Wait, before you go, I think he wants to talk to you.” 

He removed the phone from the side of his ear and carefully handed it to the boy who cradled it with both hands and held it up to his mouth. “OI, PAI.” 

Mike's voice came through quietly. “Oi, Richas. Você está sendo bom?” 

“Sim, sim,” the boy sang happily. “Eu sou bom.” 

“Bom menino. Pai Pac will be there soon okay?” 

“Okay, okay.” 

“Eu te amo.” 

“Eu também te amo.” 

The phone clicked, ending the call and Richas handed it back to Tubbo with a smile. Not even five seconds after the phone was back in his hand, the door slammed open. Standing in the now open doorway was a frazzled and incredibly attractive man. 

Richas ran over, bounding easily into his arms. 

“Richarlyson!” the man cooed, swinging him back and forth in his arms. He met Tubbo's eyes over his son's head. ‘Thank you’ he mouthed. 

Tubbo was almost too stunned to nod but he managed to as Richas's father slowly lowered him to the ground to step over to Tubbo. 

“I have to sign him out, yes?” 

Tubbo nodded, still speechless. He cleared his throat and slid the sign-out sheet across the desk. “Yeah, uh, yeah.” 

The man, Pac, from the signs of his scribbled signature, smiled blindingly at him, his son clinging to his leg. 

Tubbo noticed at that moment that Pac had a near identical prosthetic to his son. “You match,” he said before mentally slapping himself. You don't just fucking point out a man's prosthetic, no fucking wonder you're still married to Tommy. 

But Pac just laughed softly. “We do,” he said softly, rubbing the top of Richas's head. “He is very clearly my son.” 

“Are you his biological father?” Tubbo asked. Holy fucking shit, shut up you fucking idiot. He is so tired of you already, why are you asking so many questions? 

Pac just laughed softly again and the twist in Tubbo's chest felt like falling off a cliff. “Sim, yes, I am. I was the one who gave birth to him.” 

Tubbo stopped himself from asking any questions about that. He knew better than that at least. “That's really cool.” He tried a smile and felt so awkward. 

“Thank you,” Pac said. “And thank you for watching him past time. I know you probably have places to be.” 

Tubbo brushed him off with a wave of his hand. “Oh don't worry about it. My daughter is more than happy to spend more of their time with her ‘other father’.” Out of instinct, he raised his hands and made quotation marks with his hands. 

Pac raised an eyebrow curiously. 

Tubbo flushed. “A, uh, friend of mine. We got drunk married and now my daughter considers him her other father.”

Pac laughed. “No spouse of your own then? One that you're in love with anyway?” 

Tubbo flushed darker. “Ah, no. Just my husband and his girlfriend.” 

“Mmm,” Pac said, leaning over on the desk. “Good to know.” 

Tubbo froze in his spot as Pac's eyes, big and brown just like his son's, stared into his soul. He gulped before clearing his throat. “Yeah, uhmm, yeah.” The heat of his face was nearly unbearable. 

Richas gently smacked his dad on the leg. “Oi, stop that.” 

Pac leaned back, holding his hands up with an innocent expression. “What?? What?” 

The little boy glared at him with no heat. “Pai Mike told you to stop that.” 

“Well, Mikey isn't here right now is he? And he also has no control over my life.” Pac turned back to Tubbo and grabbed the pen again. He motioned towards Tubbo's arm which he held out willingly. 

Quickly the man scribbled a number onto his arm, his grip strong and warm. Tubbo felt dizzy. 

Pac dropped the pen with a smile and a wink before grabbing his son's hand. “Call me yeah?” 

Tubbo stared in disbelief, red as a beet. “...yeah,” he said softly as Pav happily bounded out the door, his son berating him in Portuguese. 

“Tommy,” he said softly when he got home, holding up his arm. “I think I got hit on.”

[arivsxq]

Pairing: Jungkook X reader

Theme: angst, friends to lovers to enemies

Warning: +18, mention of drugs, smut, angst, JK is kinda an asshole

Song: Friends-Chase Atlantic

Word count: 1k+

A/N: hey, I was bored last night so I thought “why not write a little one shot?”. Hope u like it and sorry english is my second language so I tend to make some mistakes. Have a great dayyy

One thing I learned in the past few months is to always keep your promises. I didn't do that which led to, me lying to every single person I love only to be with the man that I loved. Can you even call it love? I think so. At least from my perspective, but from his? Did he love me or did he love the rush of excitement that came with the forbidden romance between us? I don't know and I probably won't ever know but what I know is that we both screwed up. The promise we made many years ago had its purpose and we ignored it because we were blinded by the mind-blowing sex we had when none of our friends were around.

Now we're sitting here, pretending like the past months never happened, keeping up this facade for our friends in the hope that they will never find out. The smell of weed lingers in the air, taking me back to the night before everything went down. "You want sum' "J.T. holds a package of cigarettes in his hand. I stretch my arm slightly to take one and light it up before I blow out the smoke into the cold night air. "I thought you wanted to quit" His raspy voice reaches my ears, making me stop my movements for a second. "I've changed my mind" I try to make my voice sound as normal as possible but even an idiot could see that something was off.

We were very close, even before our 'little romance' but now I couldn't even look into his eyes. "You guys are fine?" Cora asks. "Yeah, why wouldn't we?" and another lie. "You two seem off. I just thought you fought or something" She's right, we fought but that's the consequence of fucking your best friend behind closed doors. They drop the topic fortunately and out of one cigarette becomes a joint. Our five friends talk and laugh but the only quiet ones are me and him.

"I should head home now. It's past midnight and I have practice tomorrow" I get up from the bench and take my bag. "How do you get home?" Dane asks, reminding me that he had quite a few drinks by now. "Walkin' " I feel his gaze on my body and before I can think any further he stands up and says "I'll drive you". I want to say something. I want to say no, I really want to but I can't because our friends are listening. I wave them goodbye and start heading into the dark with him behind me like a guardian angel.

"I can walk" my voice echoes through the darkness, making him let out a laugh. "What's so funny?" "When will you stop lying, y/n?" I stop in my tracks and turn around to face him. "You are scared of the dark. You hate walking around at this hour"

"Things change" my answer makes him laugh again. "I still wonder how the others never found out because baby you are a terrible liar". My eyes widened at his statement but also because of the pet name he always called me when no one was around.

"I'm not a liar" another lie. "You are. You never have practice on Sundays". Fuck this son of a bitch. How does he remember every detail about me and makes me feel things I shouldn't? "I'm not the only liar here" my arms crossed in front of my chest, trying to make myself feel less exposed. "You're right but the difference is that I don't deny it" I want to rip this damn smirk off of his face, that he always makes when he knows he's right. He gets on his bike and puts his helmet on while I stand there dumbfounded. "Get on top" he throws the other helmet and I catch it. My eyes roll before putting it on and hopping behind him onto the bike. He puts on the engine after making sure my hands are secured around his waist that I knew so well and before I could feel my heart beating faster, we drove off into the night.

***

I should've known better when he said he wanted to follow me upstairs and make sure I would get home safely. But I was too dumb to think twice or maybe I hoped that this would happen. That's the reason why he's pounding inside me, right? Making me cry out the noises that he loved so much while my acrylic nails bury into his skin. I feel his muscles flex under my touch. "Fuck" he curses when my walls clench around him. His heavy breaths tickle the side of my neck while his tattooed hand goes down to stoke my waist. Soft moans escape my mouth and I feel his lips again.

My legs feel numb, the kiss deepens and I feel him hitting the spot that makes me want to scream out his name. It's like he can read my mind. Fuck you Jeon. "Do it baby. Say my name" he grunts beside my ear. I whine at the pleasure that starts building up inside me and as much I hate him, I still can't get enough of him. "Say my name baby. Tell me who makes you feel good"

"Fuck you, Jungkook" is the only thing I get out before the knot in my stomach explodes and my orgasm rolls all over my body.

He moans at the feeling of my walls tightening around him and increases his speed, pounding faster into my dripping core. "I missed you" did he? "Fuck I missed you so much" my heart clenches and I feel what I did when he whispered sweet nothings when he had me in his arms. And that's the moment I start thinking that maybe he has changed. Maybe we can try to be something again but this time stop lying about it. Dumb little girl. Because the next day I wake up he's gone...again.

[usercelestial]

i would like to hear your thoughts ❤️

gahhhh okay no one throw rocks at me, this is buck x oc

adam has been a nurse for a long time. he's dealt with trauma after trauma, met so many firefighters and paramedics but none with a bigger heart than evan buckley. he's seen him around a few times, the station 118 is pretty well known in their hospital for being a bit a problem station. people are constantly getting stabbed and struck by lightning, evan buckley in particular seems like maybe he pissed off god personally. they exchanged a few words here and there, laughed at a few of the others jokes, but every time they lock eyes, buck makes quick work to look away and bite the inside of his cheek. adam specializes in hurt and believe him, buck seems... hurt.

it isn't until they bring in a young kid, probably 16 or 17, with bruises and cuts all over his body. he was beaten until- well, until it was pretty touch and go for a minute there. two of them hang back in particular, hen and buck. he's talked to hen before, back when she was going through med school, she told him about her wife and kids, how hard she was fighting for them, how draining it was. adam joked about that sounding familiar, he remembers med school well enough when he was single, he couldn't imagine it with a partner and a kid.

the two of them were standing together, watching the kid be carted away, both biting their cheeks and clenching their fists. hen whispered something to buck and patted his back.

"i know, it's just- god, that was brutal." buck wipes his face.

"that's why we look out for each other." hen squeezes his arm and walks away.

"does he have anyone to look out for him?" buck says to himself

interesting, he doesn't know the full story- just that that kid looked like he was in a hell of a lot of pain. and judging by the rainbow bracelet around his wrist, he's guessing he knows why.

he's about to work himself up to go talk to him. there's something about his eyes, wide and sad and so deep in thought he wonders how he pulls himself out.

they lock eyes again. adam gives him a tiny wave and an awkward smile. buck looks like he's been caught with his hand in the cookie jar and returns the nicety before bolting out the door. hen notices and looks back, processing something in her head. she smiles but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

then buck shows up at the hospital later in his civvies, rubbing his hands together.

"hey!" adam says just a little too loudly, cringing.

buck jumps a little, like a scared deer, adam absolutely does not think it's the cutest thing in the world.

"uh, h-hi." buck is still whining his hands together.

"adam! sorry, i don't know if i ever gave you my name or if you remember-"

"i do." buck smiles, "yeah, i remember."

"good." and then he just stands like an idiot for reasons he cannot grasp before remembering he should probably speak now, "are you visiting someone?"

"do you remember that kid from earlier? the one had the um-"

"the kid that got hate-crimed? yeah i remember. he's stable now. he had a rough night, but he'll pull through."

buck visibly releases a weight off himself, "oh, good. i just wanted to check in on him. i don't know, it was a rough call, it was driving me crazy not knowing."

adam put down his clipboard, nodding, "yeah, i mean, that stuff definitely hits home for me, for sure."

"it doesn't for me," buck says and oh, shit, i guess he's not queer, fuck did i read this wrong, "i mean! like- when i came out, i had so many people that cared about me. my sister, my-well- my dad, my best friend, my boyf-" buck cuts himself off and deflates again, "sorry. i just hated the idea that he didn't have that, you know?"

"no, i get it, don't apologize. that's-thats really sweet. visiting hours are almost over but i can see if he's up for it, okay?"

bucks nods, and maybe adam is a fool with a dumb little crush but he swears he blushes a little. he feels his heart bursting a little about it. he came back to this kid, felt the need to check in and ask about him, because he didn't have something that he did.

"pull it together," he whispers to himself as he walks away.

buck keeps coming back, too. visiting the kid as often as possible, playing cards, and giving him fun facts from some documentaries he's watched. adam perks up whenever he hears one that he's watched. he lets it slip that he watched the same one, went on the same wikipedia binge. buck does that smile softly and look away like you're about to throw thing he does. adam occasionally joins in on the conversation whenever he gets a free moment. and then eventually, the kid gets discharged and buck is there to see him off. it turns out he has an aunt out in texas that's far more accepting than his folks here. he swears he sees buck tear up a little as he walks out the door, waving back at both of them.

and adam fully expects buck to go back to being a first responder he sees a few times a week and exchanging awkward, stolen glances.

but he doesn't stop coming. buck shows up the next day with two coffees in his hand. adam waves at him and buck breathes like he's psyching himself up and walks over.

"you said you liked chai lattes, so, um, i figured-i figured you would-"

"thanks!" adam decides to put him out of his misery, "are you visiting someone?"

buck ducks his head and scratches his neck, his smile looking less tortured, "hopefully, if you were free, you."

"i was about to go on my first break, if you wanted to go for a bit of a walk." adam suggests.

"that sounds great." buck clears his throat.

"great, gimme just a second, alright?" he walks away and hears buck mutter what he thinks, "i used to be better at this."

a few weeks pass by like that. buck hovering just on the outskirts of his life, very careful not to step too far in, but still present in a way that drives him crazy. he can't stop thinking about him but he only gets him for fifteen minutes now.

"do you wanna go out for dinner sometime?" adam asks, trying to sound as casual as possible.

buck gasps, like audibly, like a woman fainting after meeting the beatles, "i-uh, i should probably get back, sorry."

oh, he watches him go. and then stop in his tracks. and then turn back around, "can i get your number actually? or instagram or something?"

trying to contain his excitement, he nods, because of course he nods. when a hot, sweet as fuck, puppy dog eyed firefighter offers you their phone number, it's a crime to say no.

eventually, they do end up on a date- or at least he thinks it's a date. he can't be sure. the wine certainly feels date-eske but he really can't be sure because buck is barely looking at him in the eyes. he picked his very best "possibly a date" outfit and went in with low expectations for anything other than a really pleasant, really awkward evening. he decides though that if he gets to spend it with buck, it feels worth the awkward tension. especially because sometimes, he can coax him out of it and he looks so- vulnerable, an open wound. he's like a starry sky that hides behind a cloudy night.

adam doesn't remember what he says but eventually they start talking about things that should probably be save for the 40th date, not the maybe, jury's still out first.

but adam definitely knows he says, "you seem like you've been hurt." because the moment he does, he wants to punch himself in the face after buck gets this horrified expression like adam just said he likes kicking dogs in his spare time.

then, the moment passes, and he clicks his tongue, "i used to be better at hiding it."

"it seems like maybe it's a good thing you don't."

buck shakes his head, "i also used to be better at this," he gestures between them, "dating, flirting, having a crush," which does get buck to smile and adam gets to see that twinkle in his eyes again.

"oh okay, so this is a date, noted. and- you're not terrible at it, it's pretty adorable, actually. and i'm hardly one to judge. i'm very familiar with hurt."

buck keeps smiling, "well, my hurt is a 40 year old firefighter-pilot who broke up with me a year ago, so- i don't know how familiar you are with that kind of hurt."

"oh, i am all too familiar with that kind of hurt. does this hurt have a name?"

buck sucks in a breath, adam gets the sense that he hasn't said it in a while, "tommy. tommy kinard."

adam feels like buck is cracked open right now, "are you not ready to move on yet? cause, i'm okay with just being friends!"

"i really don't want to."

"be friends? damn, okay-"

buck puts on a hand on his for a second and adam's heart flutters, "no, i don't want to be just friends. tommy was- well, i loved him. i mean, i-"

"still do?"

"god, i'm really cursed to fuck up first dates, aren't i?"

"it's okay. i mean, i like you. i've liked you for a while, you know? and i've had my own tommy, the one that got away, one i'll never stop loving. i think-" it hurts to think about but he knows it would hurt more to forget about it, "i think what our tommys have in common is that we never let them go, or stop loving them, but we-" he sighs, thinking about his own heartbreak, his own first love, his own missed connection, "we take the love we have for them and we can let it grow into love for others too."

bucks bites his cheek. adam briefly wonders if the inside of his mouth is scarred of all the biting, "i guess i'm scared of giving him up. like if i stop thinking about it or if i like someone else, he'll disappear and everything we had will just- vanish," he chokes out.

adam hums, "it won't. that's the great thing about tommys, right? they stay with you, you never stop feeling that love. you just- build on it and give it to the next person."

buck has tears in his eyes now, adam thinks he might too, but god he's looking at such a beautiful man, with such a big heart and he can't help but thank whoever tommy is for giving him so much love that he's overflowing with it.

"sorry-"

"don't apologize, this got heavy really quick and we're only half way through the bottle of wine," they both laugh into their glasses.

"i guess i'm a little- hurt, like you said."

"i'm a nurse, buck, i kind of specialize in hurt. and if you're willing to try, i'd like another date, one that i actually know is a date beforehand."

buck really does blush this time, "i can do that."

buck leans in and kisses him on the cheek on the way out, oh god, he's a gentleman too, i'm so screwed.

down the line, when they're celebrating their engagement in the same park they used to walk through on adam's breaks, he thinks to himself, not for the first time, oh, tommy kinard, wherever you are, whoever you're with, thank you for loving our man, and thank you for letting me love him just as much.

[ladamedusoif]

Cookies (Tim Rockford X F!Reader)

A Merry Fic-Mas - December 26

Pairing: Tim Rockford x F!Reader

Word Count: 1455

Rating: Explicit; 18+ MDNI

Warnings: Established relationship (Reader is Tim’s wife); workplace sex; fingering; unprotected but safe PiV sex (Reader is on birth control); no use of Y/N; no physical descriptions of Reader; strong language; when we say “fuck the police” this is what we mean

Part of A Merry Fic-Mas: A Pedro Boys Holiday Fic Calendar - click for masterlist!

Follow my writing blog @ladameecrit and turn on notifications to keep up with my work.

Tim kisses you on the cheek as he heads down to the precinct on Christmas Eve, overcoat in hand.

“I hate leaving you all, baby, but…”

You wrap him in a tight embrace and return his kiss. “Tim, you’re a good man. I’m sure Corinna appreciates you taking the Christmas Eve cover, so she can be at home for her baby’s first Christmas.”

Your husband’s ears pink up a little at your praise. “I guess. And older cops did it for us, too, when the kids were tiny.”

He looks over your shoulder into your mother’s kitchen, where your daughters are excitedly asking their grandma whether the Christmas cookies are cool enough to decorate. You turn and smile at the scene.

“I love you, Detective Rockford. We’ll save you some cookies. Come home safe.”

***

The cop at the front desk is thanking his lucky stars as he sips his umpteenth cup of filter coffee. It’s almost midnight on Christmas Eve, and - other than a couple of minor call-outs for the guys out in the patrol car to break up bar fights - he hasn’t had to book a single person into the cells.

It’s a goddamn Christmas miracle.

And then the door buzzes. He sighs in exasperation and checks the CCTV. A woman, wearing a winter hat and carrying a tote bag. He presses the button to let her in.

“Hello there, ma’am. Now, I have to warn you, as it’s Christmas Eve we don’t have a full complement of officers in tonight and - oh! Hi there, Mrs R!”

You smile as you take off your hat and scarf, and hand him a small tin. “Hey, Bryan. Tim in his office?”

“Sure is. Hey, these some of your famous cookies?”

You’re already climbing the stairs to your husband’s office. “Maybe. Open it and see if Santa thinks you’ve been a good cop this year.”

***

Tim’s at his desk, shirt sleeves rolled up and tie slightly loose, flipping through some papers with his glasses on. The desk lamp bathes him in a warm light, highlighting his handsome features, and you pause for a moment to take him in before you knock on the door.

He looks up in surprise before a broad smile spreads across his face. “Hello there, miss. What brings you to the precinct on a Christmas Eve?”

You carefully close the door and turn the little lock on the handle, before pulling down the blind. You reach into your bag and produce another cookie tin, sauntering over to Tim’s desk and placing it in front of him.

“So, everyone was tucked up in bed at home, and would you believe it? I met Santa Claus, leaving gifts for the girls.”

Your husband chuckles and pulls you onto his lap. “That so?”

You nod. “The man himself. And you know what he said?”

Tim shakes his head, eyes twinkling. You lean in and kiss him softly.

“He said that Tim Rockford had been a particularly good boy this year, and he should get an extra special gift.”

Tim’s eyes turn to the cookie tin. “The cookies?”

You shrug, reach for the tin, and open the lid. “You could say that, I guess. They’re part of the gift.”

He bursts out laughing when he looks inside and takes out a gingerbread man perfectly decorated to resemble - well, him. White shirt, black pants, dark hair and moustache, tie, and even a pair of shoulder holsters.

“Your handiwork?”

You throw your head back and laugh. “Damn right. Why wouldn’t I make cookies that look like the most delicious man I know?”

He eyes you up suspiciously, but a smile plays on his lips. “You said the cookies were part of the gift.”

You stand up and move his paperwork out of the way, clearing enough space on the desk so that you can sit up on it. “The other part is under my coat.”

Tim’s eyes widen as he reaches for the buttons on your knee-length woollen coat, unbuttoning them eagerly and pulling the coat open.

His mouth falls open. “Holy fuck, baby.”

“You like what you see?” You fight against all the anxieties and insecurities that haunt you about your body, focusing on the look of astonished desire that’s burning in your husband’s eyes.

Tim’s eyes roam over you, taking in the dark red bra and matching, high-waisted panties trimmed in black lace, the sheer black stockings. He carefully eases off your coat and throws it to one side, running his big hands gently over the soft skin of your shoulders as he slips down the straps of your bra.

“I love what I see.” His voice is a rapt whisper.

He slips his hands to your back and waist and pulls you tight to him as he kisses you deeply, moaning as you twine your fingers through his dark, grey-streaked curls. You bring your hands to his belt buckle, working it open and undoing his pants so you can palm his cock, already hardening under your touch.

Tim brings his mouth to the side of your neck and begins to softly bite and lick the sensitive skin, working his way down to your breasts as one hand holds you in place while the other tugs aside the lacy fabric that covers your pussy. “I fucking love what I see,” he grunts, pulling down the cups of your bra to expose your breasts. “I love you. My sexy fucking wife.”

You whine as two thick fingers trail across your folds before settling on your clit, working it steadily in the way only he knows. “I’m going to get you good and wet for me, my love,” Tim murmurs, encouraging you to lift your hips so he can ease off your panties.

“Mmmm… and then what are you going to do to me, Detective?”

He slips his fingers into your cunt, pulling a delighted gasp from you. “And then, Mrs Rockford, I plan on fucking you hard right here on this desk. But only if you come for me first.”

A hook of his fingers and you’re squealing with pleasure as Tim spreads you out in front of him, standing between your thighs as you continue to stroke his dick. He fucks you over and over with his fingers, watching you writhe and buck as you near your climax.

“C’mon, baby,” he whispers, eyes locked on yours. “You look so beautiful like this, all spread out and ready to come on my fingers. Can’t fuckin’ believe you’re mine, sometimes.” Your pussy tightens around him and he knows you’re about to come.

“Tim…Tim, fuck, I’m - oh, fuck, baby.” He keeps fingering you through the orgasm, sucking on your nipples as he extends the wave of pleasure running through you.

You reach up and undo his tie and unbutton his shirt, hitching up his under vest so you can feel the soft, warm skin of his belly against yours as he pushes himself inside you and begins to fuck you. You hitch up your legs around his waist to hold Tim in place, slipping your hands under his shirt and gripping his broad shoulders firmly as he takes you on his desk.

“Feel good?”

“Fucking incredible, Tim - you?”

He leans his head against your chest and flicks his tongue over your nipple. “Baby, you always feel amazing but this - fuck, this is so fuckin’ good. Feels so tight and wet for me. Listen to that.”

For a moment the only sound in the office is the lewd wetness, skin on skin, and your pants and moans.

“Can’t believe you did this for me, baby,” Tim grunts, speeding up his rhythm and making you whine, arching your back. “Came down here in nothing but lingerie, ready to fuck me…fuck, you’re incredible.”

You giggle a little. “Got lonely at home, my love. Needed to have my man.”

Tim’s faltering rhythm tells you he’s nearly there as he buries himself deeper inside you. “You’ve got him, baby. All yours. All…”

And he’s there, spilling inside you as he collapses on your chest.

***

Cleaned up but still a little dishevelled, you sit on the floor of the office and eat some of the cookies, accompanied by weak coffee.

In the distance, you can hear chimes signalling the hour.

“Hey. It’s midnight. Merry Christmas, Detective Rockford.”

Tim kisses you, tasting of ginger and sugar and spice and all things nice.

“Merry Christmas, Mrs Rockford. And thank you for my extra-special gift.”

[themissinghand]

Dr. Stone: You're Crazy Like Me, Dumbass

Summary: In which Senku has an older sister (who is just as crazy as him...in a good way of course).

Note: Not related/connected to my current Dr. Stone fic on Wattpad at all. This is just for fun!

Warning: Swearing and lots and lots of sibling energy

"Did you know that some metals are soooo reactive that they can explode when they come in contact with water? Make sure you protect your manhood boy." 

The Kingdom of Science certainly did not expect a person to appear out of nowhere.

Especially hanging underside down from a tree.

"Who's that?!" Gen called out, his eyes already focused on the foreign woman. 

"An enemy?" Kohaku pulled out her sword whereas the Kinrou followed suit.

"Sister?" Senku whispered out, and everyone snapped their heads to see a dazed and disbelief expression on their leader's face.

"Yo!" The older responded with a cheeky grin, and a hand raised in the air.

She had her white hair tied up in a high ponytail, showcasing their family's signature green hair tips at the ends. A lone hair strip crossed her eyes and curved to her chin.

"Heh, isn't this the lil' shit? You grew!" She jumped down the tree and walked towards the group. 

"You guys know each other?" 

Senku rubbed his temples. 

"Yea. She's my older sister-" 

"Sister?!" The woman grinned as she stopped right in front of Senku, and they brofisted as if it was normal, then followed by a noogie. 

"O-Ouch! What the heck-" 

"It's been a while you lil' shit! I thought you would have died or buried ten feet under!" Senku pulled out of her grasp and deadpanned at her. 

"Ha, you wish. Where were you even? I tried looking for you and I couldn't-" 

"Oh I came here by skateboard-"

"Skateboard?! Did you just say SKATEBOARD?" Gen's screech was followed by dazed and confused villagers. She pointed to the huge skateboard made of wood?! How?

It doesn't even look like a normal skateboard, in fact, it could be deemed as a boat with wheels at this point.

"Yea, you see, I'm an engineer. So I make shit, attach shit, and fix shit."

She definitely got a crude mouth too; everyone thought at the same time. 

"Heh, as expected of the gorilla-" Senku was cut off by the pulling of his hair.

"Hey, shouldn't you be telling me what's going on? Since when did you have so many friends?" She scrutinized every single person around, and others shivered under her look.

"Oi! Stop that! I'll explain later, but we have a war to win!" Senku escaped and then gave her a evil smirk. 

"What'cha say we make an evil weapon? With you here..."

"Oh ho?" An evil aura burst forth from the two siblings. 

"Gen...we're so screwed." 

"Kohaku...we're fucked when he's already our last hope. And now, there's another one?" 

"You got an issue? Half and half?"

"Half and half-" Gen spluttered but swallowed his pride when he saw the toned muscles underneath her coat. 

"Not bad." Senku acknowledged with nod.

"Unlike you, I work out." She rolled her eyes in response.

"Anyway, where were you exactly?"

"In hell. But now that I'm here, looks like I've reach purgatory-OW!" Senku tased her on her sides, making her jump.

"You-" Before she could unleash her wraith, Senku stops her with a question.

"How did you find me?" Senku asks sternly, and the older sighed.

"Just exploring on my own and I decided that I should find you lil' shit. So I made myself some shit and before I know it, I spot a bunch of weirdos hoping around a big pot and a fucking leak-"

"Oh fuck you."

"Oops, can't hear you over your bushy hair."

Senku rolled his eyes.

"Idiot." 

"Leek."

"Baboon."

"Loverboy."

"What? Where did you even get that from!?" 

"What? You just looked like one." She simply shrugged with a cheeky grin.

"That's not a sight you see every day. Senku's outmatched." Gen mentioned, while he watched the two siblings bicker.

Kohaku simply laughs and shakes her head.

"He deserves it."

"I'm ten billion percent gonna throw you to the wolves!" Senku almost but roars with steam going out of his head.

"And I'm ten billion percent going to hull your ass to Antarctica!" She mimicked with a girly voice, the complete opposite of her natural deep one. She then looked at Kohaku with a smile. 

"You there, you're the lil' shit's wife?" 

"W-What? No!" 

"Well who gives a fuck. Anyway, explain this war to me. I'll help you guys out." 

"Really? That would be great!" 

"Yea, explain to me what's going on. And I also need names. I can't be calling ya lil' shit's gf can I?" 

"No thank you!" 

After a solid explanation of the current situation, Senku's sister tilted her head and yawned.

"So...we're going up against this dude who's like a bitchy communist dictator kid with Heracles's strength," She looked around at the group.

"And the mother fucker who's a huge hypocrite is reviving assholes of his liking in order to kill innocent children like y'all because he thinks technology is absolute shit."

Well that's one way to look at it. 

"Uh...translation please? What's a Heracles?" Chrome jumps in and asks while scratching his head.

"It's Tsukasa but stronger." Senku simply says, and Chrome and Kohaku accepts it without question.

Gen sighs.

"Senku...I'm pretty sure it's more than that..."

[marunalu]

Hi. Many fans disappointed with new chapter. I see many complaining. I am more pissed because of Bakugo.

I am now sure that in next chapter Izuku will be catched by Ochako or sonehow Shigaraki give Izuku OFA back or his original quirk. Dont know.

How do you think DFO will be revealed then Shigaraki and AFO destroyed? Both spirituality and phisicaly.

Well, its no wonder people are upset after that shitfest of a chapter. That propably was the most anticlimactic final bossfight I have ever seen in a manga and after all the talking how izuku wants to safe tomura, dude just dies and izuku is fine with it. He just failed his attempt to save the person he wanted to save the most, but hey I guess the fistbum makes up for it (it does NOT!) Im actually curious how the japanese fanbase reacted to all of that.

I mean, of course hori had to force bakugou in it for a final time. Hes his golden baby boy afterall. Izuku cant do anything without bakugous or other peoples help. He is not allowed to shine on his own in his own fight against the main villain in HIS story. Nope, bakugou needed to help to give the final blow to afo TWICE, because HE is the true VIP of mha! I have actually seen quite a few bakugou fan who were not happy about it. If even his FANS complain about how forced and unnecessary that part was, maybe hori should ask himself if his staning for that one specific character is not going a little bit to far. I mean, seems like we just were all dumb. At the beginning of the story we were told izuku is a useless loser because he cant do anything without the help of others and in the end it turns out it was true. How could we not see that comming? The mc was not allowed to defeat the main villain himself and needs others, espicially his abuser to help him. Wow, what a great message! And the most depressing point is that hori was clearly trying to make that look like a positiv thing. There is one thing I can say for sure. I will never touch any work from hori ever again.

If this was really the conclusion of the final fight, then congratulation hori, you managed to write a more rushed and horrible conclusion for your story, then tite kubo did with bleach (which to be fair was not kubos fault but shonen jumps). Hori did literally EVERY SINGLE character except bakugou dirty and in the end even startet to write against his own established themes in the story.

Regarding dfo: I already mentioned it a few times in the past. Im still positiv dfo is canon BUT I also said I dont think anymore that dfo will end in a satisfying way. Which actually goes against what hori said, that readers wont feel dissapointed when he reveals hisashis true identity. But, right now I dont see how hori plans to manage that even with a twist. Even if lets say the clone theory ends up true (which would be hilarious because I was JOKING when I came up with it), it still would feel like so much wasted potential. And the thing is, while it would make me happy if it turns out true I would still be mad about all the rest hori fucked up which would make it impossible for me to enjoy the dfo reveal. And as much as I love dfo, if it turns out the afo clone theory is true and hisashi is the real afo who gets a happy ending while tomura stays dead and doesnt get one after everything afo did to him and the rest of the lov stay miserable too, I will still give hori the middlefinger. The only way I would be able to enjoy it is if hisashi ends up as the afo clone who choose a different path then his original body. It would still make dfo canon just in a unexpected way and it could be interesting to see in hisashi that afo COULD have been happy if he had choose a similar way.

I dont know, maybe in the end there is really some kind of twist involved. Shonen jump still hasnt announced that mha will end in the next few chapters and normally they do that at least 5-10 chapters before the final chapter. Maybe we are just panicking over nothing and hori has everything planned out perfectly. Maybe there is more to come. We really cant say for sure. There are still some plots who need answers and I cant see how hori wants to conclude everything in just 2 more chapters. On the other side this final arc was horrible rushed, even more horrible written and all in all a big dissapointment and waste of a lot of peoples time.

Who knows maybe thats why there is a break next week. So hori can wait for the reactions of the readers and include whatever twist he may think could work.

[sniksnak-sad-blog]

why not the most pressing topic

(be warned, armchair phycology inbound)

oh Pansear highlight of this community (past tense) they made amazing things, such as the kiss me kill me map, their comics period, and left an empty wasteland in their leave.

God what a fucking mess, they closed off there final message, leaving the rumors to run rampant only for the source to let the blame fall a step down the chain.

I dont blame Azriel, i find it hard to do that, they are just a minor, just like me. They take just as much responsibility as us, the spread it without fact checking, you know who else did that? And they had an excuse, mental health and a particular distain for our long gone friend. (Witch mind you in fact is totally justified, they where the one wronged by Pansear, its up to morals for us to forgive Pan, but Azriel is under no such obligation.) And hey, look at that, the internet beat the shit out of them, doing exactly as I expected and not thinking a single intelligent thought.

Speaking of which I need to real quick give some sympathy to those poor bastards I just insulted. excuse me if this might get long, but I find it eager to attempt an understanding for each party in this shit show:

You, a young teen, have looked up to a famous artist for making works that you personally relate to. You follow them religiously watch there every step and treat them like a king, their word is law. You have had their work lift you, help you though the days where it just doesn't feel like you can make it. You might even find someone who kept fighting on because of that work, it might have saved someone's life.

one day you wake up to find a post, something about how pansear is a pedophile, about how they support grooming, about how they are a bitch and deserve to rot in hell. Well, you might have seen that last part, I'm sure it was out there some where. Needless to say you were devastated, it was now dangerous to even support this person you loved, and had helped you though maybe even your darkest times.

It's a hit, but you survive, Pansear assures you of that. They continue to post, they seem pretty down, and you feel very down, the whole situation tugs on your mind, not all the time, but in the late hours of the night, where instead of sleeping, you think, you think about how it all could have gone better.

then tragedy strikes again, something far more conclusive, the claims previously put out now spread like open flame, lit by the gasoline of 4 screenshots.

it hurts, it hurts a fucking lot, you cry, you cry a fucking lot. Worse, Pansear isn't here to defend them self, they left, Pansear left. If it was harder to ignore, now its impossible, you cant focus, you cant even talk about it, then you would be "defending Pansear."

that would hurt, that would hurt a fucking lot. And you have not choice but to let this rage simmer for about 2 weeks, and after that time.

you find reason to let it boil over. Who could blame you, no where to put this stress, no where to put this anger, you go to whoever you can, and (for lack of a better term) beat the shit out of them.

excuse my writing, i got a habit of that. but i should clarify, i was not there, this is a prediction of how i would have reacted if i where a bit farther down the rabbit whole. I know Pansear was popular, it gives me reason to believe that this might be a common experience. Or perhaps it was different. Perhaps for some they had a server, a place to talk about there feelings without judgement, where they could prosses loss. (i know by way of my self that this might have been the first time someone truly lost someone else)

So take that story with a grain of salt, but i do find it rather important to ask you, why? Why did we have to be so cruel to each other, could we not have taken a step back and realize that name calling and death threats only made things worse.

There is a reason, even for the most extreme situations, that someone says "do not harass anyone." When did we forget that?

I should clarify, I'm not sure how the fandom as a whole responded, I'm not on twitter (GTFO of there if you are) and where I am on tumblr, it was not common mention. I've reason to believe that the story is not entirely of my mind alone, simply because with size it becomes harder and harder to not have one of each person.

i think this will be my first rant, i have only spoken on one of the things i want to talk about i have thought a lot about this, in the dead of night. i dont think ill forget this, but i will chose to remember this as something positive, what ever positivity i can get out of it.

to anyone out there reading this i think its important to let you know what i believe is the final message sent in Pansear's discord server, not the emote ones but the forest.

to anyone struggling out there, remember, Pansear believed in you. i take solace in this message, you should too.