#did it matter to the fic? no. its 800 words. nothing there mattered. but like now i know i was thinking of alligators. not crocs.

[narutomaki]

a fic that I'm reading said cyanide and arsenic don't exist in the Naruto verse so I decided to look the compounds up because well. I guess.

but cyanide is one of the most popular trope poisons and is also found naturally occurring in forms that are less toxic than lab synthesized versions. but are still toxic in quantities above tolerable dose.

and arsenic is the 53rd most abundant element. which isnt like an insane amount but for sure enough to learn about and synthesis

like I'm all for not looking shit up especially if it doesn't matter but if you're going to have your characters main interest and/or method of killing be poison. than. like. a cursory search for purely synthetic poisons would get you pretty far for ones that you can cut

[thnxforknowingme]

Texts With Benefits

Pairing: Kurtbastian | Rating: E | Word Count: 800

Summary: Kurt texts Sebastian about a bad date he had. Sebastian cheers him up.

Notes: This fic is thanks in part to @backslashdelta who said on this post that she wished Kurt and Sebastian did end up sexting, and I was like..."yeah actually, me too." So I decided to write that. This could be seen as an alternate version of the scene from A Matter of Distance, but can also be read on its own. All you need to know is that Kurt and Sebastian live in different cities, and are friends with benefits who hook up when Sebastian visits New York.

Text Message

Today 10:17 PM

Kurt: I just had the worst date.

Sebastian: Oh? Do tell.

Kurt: Just like - no chemistry, nothing in common, either he was ranting about something I didn’t care about or we were sitting in awkward silence.

Sebastian: And how was the sex?

Kurt: Ha ha. Non-existent. I’m back home eating comfort food.

Sebastian: You never know, maybe that was the missing piece. 

Sebastian: Maybe everything else could have been overlooked for the guy’s incredible sexual prowess.

Kurt: Doubtful. Doesn’t matter now, anyway.

Sebastian: So you’re just moping now? You texted me to mope?

Kurt: Maybe? Do I not deserve a little sympathy?

Sebastian: Yes, obviously, my deepest apologies. 

Sebastian: What can I do to help poor little Kurt who had a bad date?

Kurt: Distract me from my woes?

Sebastian: When I want a distraction from life, I find that going out for drinks and dancing is a great pick-me-up.

Sebastian: But you don’t go to clubs much, do you?

Kurt: No, not anymore.

Sebastian: We should go clubbing sometime when I’m in town. 

Sebastian: God, it’s been so long since I’ve been to my old spots in New York.

Sebastian: I’d love to see you loosen up on a dancefloor, all touchy and forward the way you are when you’re drunk.

Kurt: I’m not that touchy

Sebastian: Uh, yes you are. With me at least.

Kurt: Well maybe that’s just a you thing.

Sebastian: Then I’m flattered, sir.

Kurt: It would be fun. I don’t really like dancing with strangers but it’d be fun with you.

Sebastian: Get a few shots in you so you’re fawning all over me, too buzzed to care if you look good while dancing, but all the sexier for not caring.

Kurt: Mm, and you’d fucking love the attention, being all possessive. I’ve seen how you get.

Sebastian: Shut up

Kurt: Make me.

Kurt: (this is okay, right?)

Sebastian: so okay

Sebastian: Since you’re being a bitch, I’d grab your jaw and kiss you to shut you up

Sebastian: make you forget about anything but me

Kurt: I’d kiss you back, because no matter how annoying you are you’re a good fucking kisser

Kurt: and grab your arm to hold on, press my hips against you so there’s no space between us

Sebastian: I’d put my other hand on your back to push you closer

Sebastian: slide it just low enough to tease you

Kurt: fuck you’re such a tease

Kurt: I want you

Kurt: I’d insist we go back to your hotel

Sebastian: we’d take a cab to get there faster

Sebastian: the whole ride I’d keep my hand on your thigh, tracing your inseam

Sebastian: making sure you couldn’t cool down

Kurt: I hate you

Kurt: god I’m so hard

Sebastian: in this imaginary taxi or real life?

Kurt: both

Sebastian: same

Kurt: In your room I’d make you sit on the bed and watch while I undressed

Kurt: force you to look without being able to touch me

Kurt: and I’d take my sweet time

Sebastian: god, seeing your dick so big and hard for me through those tight fucking briefs you wear

Kurt: I’d watch you while I slowly take them off

Sebastian: i can’t stay still anymore

Sebastian: i’m there, in front of you

Sebastian: i want to taste you

Kurt: fuck seb

Sebastian: lick up your cock, cover you in my mouth and swallow around you

Kurt: so good

Sebastian: i miss how you taste, i want to feel you in my throat

Sebastian: …kurt

Kurt: Sorry I was, uh, finishing

Sebastian: you came already?

Kurt: Yes! It was really hot!

Sebastian: Damn, and I had so many other plans

Kurt: Aww. Maybe another time?

Kurt: Do you still need more?

Sebastian: sure, supplement my imagination

Kurt: After I came down your throat I’d be so heavy and relaxed. I’d collapse onto the bed and spread my legs wide for you.

Sebastian: you want it hard?

Kurt: Yes, god, I need you, your fingers and your perfect cock

Kurt: wanna feel you thrust inside me

Kurt: you always know exactly what to do

Kurt: I love how strong you are, feeling you hold me up and pound into me

Kurt: I’d beg you for more, more, I can never get enough of you and your cock filling me up

Sebastian: damn okay. Hold on

Kurt: Good hold on, or?

Sebastian: Yes, hold on as in I was trying not to get come on my phone

Kurt: Gross

Sebastian: All because of you, baby ;)

Kurt: Grossssss

Sebastian: I liked you better when you were horny

Kurt: Thanks for that, though. It was an excellent distraction.

Sebastian: If you’re ever looking for that kind of distraction, hit me up.

Kurt: I’m gonna take you up on that

Sebastian: looking forward to it.

Kurt: Goodnight, Sebastian.

Sebastian: Night, Kurt.

[amiah-fanfic]

Works and Updates

Hello, I'm amiah at ao3. I'm working on Fire Emblem: Three Houses fanfiction. This is my list of current works. Please check here for updates if you like my writing!

FE3H: The Wrong Way to Be a Rival

FE3H: The Three Courts (soon)

See further details about my projects below the break.

12.13.22

To be published soon-ish:

The Three Courts is a dark, modern, urban fantasy au where the Agarthans won the battle for supremacy in the middle ages. The current era, nearly 800 years later, is a cold technocratic government that cares more for its bottom line than the needs of the people.

The Courts of the Moon, Wind, and Flower are what remain of the Goddess' children, their gifts waning much like their relevance. Old money has kept the Crested safe in modern society. This matters little when a simple house call turns into something far darker.

There are few who know the truth, and everyone holds their own piece of the puzzle. For the first time in centuries, the Courts must come together to protect their legacy. Or choose a new path entirely.

The kids are mostly here in an ensemble cast that I'll need a graph to keep track of. Those that haven't... ya know... 🗡 ahem.

BUT! Big feels! Gruesome battles! Sexy times! Rampant murder! A few fluffy flashbacks. And secrets of course.

I needed a reason for Claude to be there. :)

I have a great beta now, but the more the merrier. If you're interested I'm willing to do the same for you!

12.06.22

Chapter 4 of Rivals is up! Yay!

"Chapter 4: Commander of the Resistance

I returned to Garreg Mach after five years, dusty and saddle-sore and met immediately by Byleth. Everyone around him had changed, grown, wore shadows under their eyes. Myself included. He was the same, a demon with a sword and a man of few words.

Yet now, countless others listened for those words. At long tables, in lecture halls, and on the battlefield.

He was no longer responsible for only himself, or a small classroom. The Resistance Forces followed behind the Crest of Flames.

He was finally here, in my sights, yet further away than ever.

Not that I'll ever stop running to meet him."

11.19.22

I am actively working on chapters 4 and 5 of Rivals! I know it hasn't been updated in awhile but I plan to update with Chapter 4 in early December. My readers sweet comments are fuel to me, so thank you!

ALSO: Looking to obtain some PAID fanart of my story. Would love to talk to a reader of my fic or FE3H in general that also does commission work. I have ideas but open to suggestions! Creative direction is totally up to you and I'm excited to see what you'll create. Send me a message if interested.

....

The Wrong Way to be a Rival

Language: English; Words: 17,807; Chapters: 4/6

Last updated: 12.06.22

Rated: T

My Unit | Byleth & Leonie Pinelli, Leonie Pinelli & Claude von Riegan, Felix Hugo Fraldarius & Leonie Pinelli, Jeralt Reus Eisner & Leonie Pinelli. My Unit | Byleth/Leonie Pinelli, Leonie Pinelli, My Unit | Byleth, Felix Hugo Fraldarius. Jeralt Reus Eisner, Claude von Riegan. Golden Deer Students (Fire Emblem)

"Did you ever notice him like, picking legs off of bugs or anything like that when he was a kid?"

"Goddess, Hilda, NO! He's weird but not in that way."

"So. You have met him before!"

"Yeah. He's Captain Jeralt's son. Of course I have."

"Why don't you ever talk about him then?"

"Well. There's nothing to talk about."

Okay, that was a small lie. There are certainly things to say about Byleth Eisner.

Captain Jeralt is his father, so greatness should run in his son's blood. But the guy barely speaks. He has the presence of a log. And he calls his own dad by his first name! How damn rude can you be? He has a lot of nerve for someone who ran around with a lopsided bowl-cut as a kid.

I just hope we don't bump into each other much over the next year. Thank the Goddess he chose Black Eagles…

A light-hearted FE:3H AU where Leonie did, in fact, know Byleth from childhood and thinks he's the worst. Until she doesn't, of course.

....

The Three Courts

Language: English; Words: 4289; Chapters: 1/?

Last updated: 12.13.22

Rated: M

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Blue Lions Students (Fire Emblem), Golden Deer Students (Fire Emblem), Black Eagles Students (Fire Emblem), Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, Rhea (Fire Emblem), Claude von Riegan, Hilda Valentine Goneril, My Unit | Byleth, Hubert von Vestra, Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Sylvain Jose Gautier, Mentioned Blue Lions Students (Fire Emblem), Mentioned Golden Deer Students (Fire Emblem), Mentioned Black Eagles Students (Fire Emblem), Drama, Romance, Horror, Action/Adventure

The Goddess is dead.

The church is a mockery of Her former glory.

And the ones who once Slithered now perch in high places.

Tales of battle mages and Sacred Beasts lie in dusty books, ancient history to the greater populace. But relics of those times still exist within the dwindling societies of The Three Courts. Some within the Courts still carry the torch of tradition, while others work to see its flame gutter out. And those who merely watch events unfold will soon be forced to take a side. Or create something else entirely.

It is Agarthan Year 788 and war returns to Fódlan once again.

An original modern AU/urban fantasy using the Fire Emblem: Three Houses world and characters. Ensemble cast, multiple POV throughout.

[1kook]

A COLLECTION  [ updated: 8 . 23 . 21 ]

— STATUS ONGOING — NO REPOSTS — ASKS under #ncouple ! — Copyright © 2021, 1kook on tumblr

—NETFLIX & CHILL.

summary If you planned things right, you could rain down your raging displeasure on Jeon Jungkook right after the meal but before this proposed ‘Netflix and chilling,’ maybe dramatically throw your glass of wine at him, before storming out of his place and reporting him to the authorities (Namjoon) for his douchebag personality.  warnings smut in the forms of grinding, oral (f), cum eating, vanilla unprotected sex, dirty talk misc use of the oldest trick in the book (“your hands are sooo big”), shy oblivious AND gentleman jk? pick a struggle, brief ment of app developer kook, evil and conniving oc  word count 10.2k  posted june 12, 2020

—HULU & WOOHOO.

summary But there’s more important matters to attend to than Jungkook’s Jersey Shore boner. warnings slight feelings of insecurity, smut in the forms of fingering, cunnilingus, cum eating, squirting, hand jobs, unprotected sex, riding, slight praise kink  misc if you’re not a Jersey shore fan honestly GET OUT, mentions of capitalism😡, more kind/understanding kook, basically a “what are we?” fic but silly, irresponsible emailing habits, its so dumb just read word count 6.3k posted july 4, 2020

—IMAX & CLIMAX.

summary The occasional dark horse candidate among Barbie movie binges— Jungkook gets weirdly horny and fucks you to the tune of a classic Barbie movie soundtrack. warnings smut in the form of blowjobs, tit play, praise kink, standing sex, unprotected sex, reverse cowgirl (? kinda), daddy kink that morphs into ily kink misc  jk is an avid history channel viewer, jk hates Barbie movies ik we took an L today girls 😔, jk goes thru like 4 personality changes (commanding > soft > mean > in love), honestly idk what to tag it’s a mess, he’s still cheesy and romantic but also 👀 just read word count 9.8k posted august 5, 2020

—KISSANIME & FOREPLAY.

summary You get a glimpse of the KissAnime screen for a good two seconds before about seven ads pop up. Another tab to a raunchy hentai website opens, and Jungkook groans. warnings mentions of hentai, smut in the forms of cunnilingus, masturbation (f), oral (f), use of a sex toy, fingering, nipple play, face sitting/fucking/riding idk (f), praise kink, hints of dumbification, cum eating, jk is like passive aggressive in this one, 4 (f) orgasms, this is the kicker: sub kook at the end😳, like 2 sec of dom yn lol, & u get 0.002 sec of adams apple kink misc more dumb story lines, made up sex stores bc my creativity knows no bounds, Jungkook plays nice but is actually mean for the majority of it, once again doyeon plays a pivotal role in the furthering of women empowerment, internal love monologues about jk best boy<3 word count 8.2k posted september 1, 2020

—DISNEY+ & BUST.

summary There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb. It’s not. It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door.   warnings arguments, feelings of insecurity, bit of asshole jk, smut in the forms of humiliation, dumbification, choking, fingering, spit kink, self punishment (? idk lol), unprotected but [ passionate ] sex, jk losing his cool, the return of mean jk, desperate jk, he is actually an emotional mess in this one wtf misc angst, anniversaries, the L word😳, app developer kook, rip ‘pretty girl’ </3, we all become phineas and ferb stans word count 13k posted september 9, 2020

—ESPN & BDSM.

summary You would like to personally thank every loud-mouthed, ESPN commentator out there for saving you from Jungkook’s dangerous seduction skills.   warnings smut in the forms of brief femdom, handcuffs, nipple clamps, blindfolding, flogging/use of a riding crop, soft dom kook, cunnilingus, spitting, unprotected but passionate, degradation, as always it starts horny n then turns into I love u kink misc kook has a swollen ankle so idk how he did all this, jk abuses the fuck outta pet names part 7, revenge gone wrong tbh, this was honestly a beginner’s intro to vanilla bdsm word count 12.7k posted september 14, 2020

—YOUTUBE & USE LUBE.

summary You can’t believe this is Jungkook’s preferred sick day treatment; YouTube, cuddles, and an ugly amount of lube. warnings smut in the forms of nipple play, handjobs, spit kink, face riding, unprotected, flavored warming lube, riding, praise kink, soft femdom, missionary bc his eyes are pretty, tit sucking, tit fucking, more jk has an impreg kink, oh and this is all subby kook misc domesticity baby!! fluff, soft scenes /.\, jk is sick:((, doyeon is A Doctor, yn sees an opportunity and she grabs it, surprise ending <3 word count 8.7k   posted september 30, 2020

—VIKI & HICKEYS.

summary Just like in those Viki dramas Jungkook likes, the world around you is enveloped in shades of pink and red, kisses and hearts, so many goddamn roses it makes you sneeze. It’s absolutely perfect— nothing could possibly go wrong when there’s so much love in the air.   warnings a little hurt + a lot of comfort, mentions of cheating!villain!jin, insecure!kook, emotional breakdowns, mentions of jk’s lonely past, jk cries :( smut in the forms of making out, eating out, fingering, clit play, hickeys, jk likes cum, double orgasm, squirting, tiny praise kink, blindfolding, rough + unprotected sex, doggy style, choking!!!, breeding/impreg kink, JEALOUS KOOK, mini hand kink, a lil bit of spanking, degradation, he gets progressively meaner lol oc cries, jk is a good boy n I want him to be happy   misc there’s a lot of fuckin plot omfg -_-, it’s Valentine’s Eve!, doyeon makes Some Points, mentions of park seojoon juicy ass, they go on a d8 😳, oc like rlly wants to marry him, oc commits double phone homicide word count 16.3k posted january 14, 2021

—PEACOCK & SWEET TALK.

summary “I wanna watch Solange in Bring It On,” Jungkook smiles, and you have to wonder who exactly this blond man is and what he did with your teen-movie-hating boyfriend.   warnings smut in the forms of kissing, cunnilingus (eating out + fingering), light praise, a lil body worship, jk fat cawk, brief nipple play, playful jk, unprotected sex, riding and missionary, the jk hand kink, I love you kink, jk wants nudes, jk’s cheerleader fantasies mentioned, spit kink, light choking, jk has like a scent kink (?), mention of collars and pet play misc app developer jk becomes even MORE app developer-y, oc is anti-google, there's plot, a 2 year anniversary, Solange knowles appreciation, BLOND JK!!!, gets sappy for a sec, seahorse marriage mention, doyeon x joon side pairing, jk is disgustingly dreamy and oc is threatened by that fact word count 10.7k posted march 23, 2021

— CRUNCHYROLL & RAIL.

summary Never mind the fact you really like Sailor Moon, or that you really want to pay attention to every little detail; the moment becomes Jungkook and his big smile and his red cheeks and the tiny box he produces from within his pocket. warnings smut in the forms of making out, jk nipple play, some 69 action, cunnilingus, blowjobs, brief choking, jk trying his best to listen to oc but he doesn’t rlly :/, fingering, missionary bc his eyes are pretty, unprotected fuckin raw, its romantic but when is it not… misc fluffy and domestic <3, weekend getaway <3, the Big Question, shy jk, sailor moon supremacy, jk makes this big elaborate speech about the sun and moon, mentions of 240p YouTube quality word count 8.7k posted may 21, 2021

—FUNIMATION & PROCREATION.

summary Never mind your upcoming wedding, this was perhaps the greatest moment of your life— the day Jungkook sought out an anime on his own. warnings kissing, smut in the forms of cunnilingus, cum eating, mentions of anal, doggy style, unprotected sex with the intention of pregnancy, spitting, hand holding<3 misc the wedding night, Doyeon strikes again, jjk watches  jjk, oh no not twins word count 9.1k posted july 31, 2021

—BOOMERANG AND BANG. 

coming soon

—COOKIES & CREAM.

summary Jungkook will watch a thousand cheesy Christmas movies if it meant making you happy. (And maybe having his dick sucked.) warnings smut in the form of blowjobs, face fucking, cum facials, fingering, overstim, double orgasm, r*mantic sex, riding, unprotected, cream pies, jk does this weird thing where he licks her face yeah idk, jk loves seeing his gf cry, jk has an obsession with jizz   misc jk pov !!, eggnog slander, jk hates xmas movies, oc dresses like a sexy mrs claus, Elf !!, jk is in loooove word count 7.1k posted december 23, 2020

— TUTUS & TIARAS.

summary your first pregnancy through the lens of your husband warnings smut in the forms of penetrative sex, sex while pregnant, unprotected sex, tit play, cunnilingus, mutual masturbation, sticking the tip in and jacking off/cockwarming?, creampies, nose kink (? like she grinds against his nose), infatuation with scent, frottage/grinding, lactation kink, titluvr jk [bass boosted] misc married ncouple <3, domesticity, jk pov, mood swings, pregnancy, GIRLDAD!JK, DILF!JK, pregnant!reader, jk’s kids are virgos its true  word count 10k posted august 23, 2021

— one.

summary Maybe Jungkook wasn’t always as cool and composed as you initially believed. But that’s okay, because you love him all the same.  word count 1.3k posted September 10, 2020

—two.

summary Even after all these years, all these doubts, and all this solitude that was really no one’s fault but his own, he still finds himself hoping that maybe you’ll be the one. word count 1k posted september 11, 2020

—three.

summary But Jungkook loves the sun. word count 1.5k posted september 12th, 2020

—four.

summary For the last ten minutes or so his mind has been bothered by one thing and one thing only— the hair that hung in his face. word count 800 words posted september 22, 2020

—five.

summary Startled and inexperienced, he can’t do anything but rub his hands over your back. “It’s fine, it’s fine,” he murmurs, even though it’s not. word count 1.3k posted september 22, 2020

—six.

SUMMARY Jungkook enjoyed pushing you down, indulging you in all your little fantasies, but he too had some he wanted to live out. WC 1.8k POSTED september 25, 2020

—seven.

summary And lastly, Jungkook will bring it full circle by indulging you two in some good old fashion spooky sex where he nuts inside you because the only thing scarier than a scary movie is a pregnancy scare. It’s a perfect plan. word count 2k posted october 30, 2020

—eight.

summary You always do this— always ask for more. You take and you take until there’s nothing left for Jungkook to give. But Jungkook is the same.   word count 1.9k posted december 28, 2020

—nine.

summary “I think that, like— me and you? We’re like, totally destined,” you ramble, “you should, like, take my number! And maybe we can, like— Netflix and chill one of these days?” word count 2.2k posted january 8 2021

—ten.

summary See, there’s no one in this world who ignores his house rules more than you. Even worse, there’s no one on this planet who can make Jungkook ignore his own rules like you do. word count 1.4k posted february 14, 2021

—eleven.

summary You’re too bright, too… there. His shell is too small. word count 1.2k posted may 3, 2021

—twelve.

summary Anyway, if it was up to Jungkook, Kim Doyeon would not be a member of the Engagement Ring Committee. word count 1.4k posted may 8th, 2021

—thirteen.

summary Because for as much shit as you let him get away with, Jungkook is certain you’ll draw the line today.   word count 1k posted june 13, 2021

—fourteen.

summary Jungkook needs you to know that you can always count on him. word count 1.3k posted july 6, 2021

—fifteen.

summary It’s Jungkook’s teenage fantasy— being pushed down by a cheerleader. word count 3.1k posted august 9, 2021

— sixteen.

summary Your skin is warm and smells like sunshine. Jungkook can’t really explain it. (And also like the sunscreen you had doused him in earlier, but that isn’t as romantic.) word count 1.9K posted august 11, 2021

—seventeen.

summary She looks his way and suddenly Jungkook is nineteen again, in his dorm, listening to the first person he ever thought he loved telling him he’s too much to handle. word count 1.6k posted august 18, 2021

beautiful banners made for series!

cute and cozy gif by the lovely @ladyartemesia​ 

LASTLY: 

[literaryspinster]

Fanfic woes

I’m having the hardest time getting words onto paper these days. Both with my original work and with fanfiction. I think it’s probably standard issue writer’s block exacerbated by pandemic stress, but it’s rough in any case. I did start my Titans Dickkory detective mermaid fic but the first 800 words were a bitch to write and I’m not even convinced they’re all that great (this could also be because I want to hop right into the mermaid stuff but know that I can’t yet, lol). I don’t usually post previews for first chapters but If anyone can give it a read and let me know whether I’m on the right track that could really help. I copy pasted it below. Thanks in advance. The call comes at 5 in the morning, which can only mean that there's been some sort of panic. A rare occasion on Isle DeGranger, population 479. 

His waking brain tries to latch onto a possible scenario, maybe some drunk frat boy on vacay stole a yacht. Solving that mystery should be a good enough hour to kill.

He cracks an eye open to look at his phone, buzzing insistently atop a stack of two Uhaul boxes where an inn table should be. In a few short weeks there’ll be a city skyline right outside his window rather than the unnervingly calm waters of the harbor. Just his luck for things to finally start getting interesting the second he plans to take Rachel and leave this place behind for good. 

Halfway through the next ring, he hits the accept key and clears his throat to answer.“Grayson, you’re going to want to get down here,” Deputy Kent says before Dick can get the groggy “hello” out. There’s something haunted in the young man’s voice, like he’s seen evil for the very first time. The deputy doesn’t need to begin explaining for Dick to throw the covers off of himself. He knows he won’t be going back to bed anytime soon.

He stops in Rachel’s doorway to tell her he’ll be back before breakfast, as usual she answers with a light groan, and he decides to chalk it up to sleep this time.

***

Deputy Conner Kent was the only officer on duty when the USS Patriot crashed into the rocks, littering the harbor with packages of incidentals needed to keep island folks fed and sane. According to the dispatch call, the crew and captain were miraculously unharmed aside from some scrapes and bruises, and the damage to the ship was nothing insurance wouldn’t be able to cover. The crash hadn’t been the thing to put that cold shake in his deputy’s voice. It was the lighthouse.

It hadn’t flashed its beam over the water that morning, and before the Patriot had had the chance to course correct, it was too late. As the lone detective on the island, at least for the rest of the summer, it’s Dick’s job to find out why. Things don’t tend to go wrong on Isle DeGranger. It was supposed to be an ideal place for Rachel for that very reason. There’s plenty of sun, clean air, friendly people, safety. 

“It’ll be just like Anne Of Green Gables,” he’d said to her awkwardly the day she moved in. She’d been ignoring the task of emptying her suitcase and ignoring him even harder, choosing to stare out of the window at the sailboats as if she wanted nothing more than to sail back to the mainland on one. Because she wasn’t Anne Shirley-Cuthbert, she was Rachel Roth, a sullen girl with a dead mother and a deadbeat father, who had to leave everything she knew back in New York.

 As for Dick, he’d never meant to wind up here in the first place. Rachel hadn’t been the reason he came, only the reason he stayed for so long.She needed stability, he told himself, a tranquil few years to heal and be a kid before running off to start her own life. But for whatever reason, she never seemed to believe that anything he did was really for her. He hadn’t wanted to be a father so young, especially not to a grieving teenager, and she could see how the obligation weighed down his every move, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. He thought that finally deciding to take her back to New York would be just the thing she needed to realize how hard he was trying, but then that was the problem wasn’t it?

He shouldn’t have needed to try so hard.

The sun begins to gently creep up over the harbor as he steers the precinct’s motorboat toward the scene of the crash. He’ll call for backup if he needs it, but for now the priority is to find out why exactly the lighthouse keeper has gone awol, why he didn’t make any calls to alert them of the trouble, or answer any for that matter. The investigation isn’t a two person job just yet, and Deputy Kent is still needed in town, just in case a frat boy decides to steal a yacht after all.Still, the whole thing creeps him out. In 40 years there’s never been an incident up on those rocks. 

[1-800-seo]

1-800-SEO presents: — Where Is My Mind?

genre: dystopia/slight angst/escapism

pairing: Johnny Suh/Gender Neutral Reader

warnings: IV’s/needles, intravenous use of narcotics, bad coping mechanisms, alcohol use, depictions/descriptions of poverty to a degree, implied sexual activity, dreams

word count: 2506 words

in affiliation with: @127-mile ‘s

drive in fic collaboration

summary: Based in a future where your wildest dreams can be lived in for a few hours through intravenous methods, vices and virtues blur. Scraping by is all you can do, and escapism is all you live for. Maybe that will change when you meet him. (Loosely based on Inception.)

The familiar haze of mental fog clouds your mind, it coats the edges of your thoughts like a viscous syrup. You find yourself in a wheat field, the golden crops stretching for as far as the eye can see ahead of you. The swirling breeze passes over your hands and you feel it tickle, a sensation you’ve not felt in a long time. After taking a crisp piece of the surrounding plants into your hands, you feel each and every texture it offers with a fingertip. It’s not like you’ve ever touched real wheat before, you want to imprint it to memory. With the piece of crop still in your dominant hand, you turn your head, body following its arc too, and your eyes meet a cottage. The building just exudes a comforting energy, it's homely even when your real home is nothing alike. The trees that are positioned off to the side of the cottage provide the right amount of shade, one side of the house has full direct sunlight and the other is gently shaded, but in a comforting way. You drop the wheat and make your way over to the cottage. As you make your way up to the front door, following the perfectly placed path, you take in the smell of the decorative flowers that adorn the surrounding gardens. The smell of real flowers is something you’re not used to. Finally upon reaching the door, you outstretch your hand to grasp the door handle. The moment your skin makes contact with the sun-heated metal, a blinding hot white shoots across your vision, and pulls you out.

Waking up is never easy, but it’s not like you’re not used to it. The moment you open your eyes you are met with the same dingy apartment as almost every other wake up. Your arms feel weak from lack of circulation as you reach across to pull out your IV. It doesn’t sting, you’ve done this so many times, it’d be surprising if it did. As your eyes adjust to the light you start to make out the time, it’s displayed on the heads up view of your plexi-wall, and reads 11:36PM. Stars, it’d been 7 hours since you last ate, and your body is definitely letting you know as it starts to wake up from its lulled state. You shift your wobbly legs away from the crusty office chair you were sitting on and begin to make your way over to the food dispensary. You hold your palm over the sensor as a silver sachet slides out and into your palm. You make quick work of depositing its contents into a bowl and mixing it with hot water, your hunger spurring you to be swifter.

Before you know it, all of the food has been devoured, your stomach full, and the night is ready to be conquered. You have no desire to leave the flat, nothing calling you besides money to leave the (lack of) comfort of your home. But of course, money always beats out desire, and so you hastily put on your shoes and proofed jacket, grab your safety umbrella and backpack, and leave. Things had to be paid for, and your credits were seriously running low, if you wanted to continue with your expensive hobby, it meant scrounging. You’re not dumb, you knew that daydreaming wasn’t a cheap, safe, respectable, or even remotely healthy hobby to have, but at this point it was escapism, freedom from pain, and so you’d do anything for that sweet peace.

Once you’re at street level, you put up your umbrella. At this point it’s better to be safe than sorry, the acid rain warning that you saw on your dash ringing out in your memory. It never used to be like this, acid rain was once unheard of, but in the last ten years pollution came to the point that even the water cycle couldn’t be trusted. That’s the joys of living in urban scum, you think to yourself. Your ears register the faint sounds of sizzling rain droplets on your umbrella and you're grateful for it now. Your pace quickens, and after a blur of around 20 minutes walk, you arrive at your workplace.

Workplace was definitely too light of a word to call the building that stands before you. The imposing structure juts out into the dark with brightly coloured lights on its each corner, signalling its presence, as if it was easy to miss without the lights. The commonplace sound of thumping bass echoes about the street for meters, and it only gets louder as you walk up the stairs and into the building. A sign reading ‘Sondaero LivingSpaces’ greets you, but you know full well the people here are barely living. Oh no, this type of place is home to some of the most prolific daydreamers; well, the most prolific for the underground scene. You step through a set of large doors and out into the main courtyard. It’s an indoor park, filled with neon bioluminescent plants, and jarringly placed speakers. If this was any other establishment, the sea of ravers surrounded by people daydreaming on cot beds would be jarring to you, but you’re so used to it that you couldn’t care less; or more so, you’re plainly desensitised to it.

You find your way out onto the dancefloor and surround yourself with people - the more people the better, it just makes your job easier. Safely hidden in the palm of your hand is a biometric chip you crafted yourself. Implants are a little drastic in your opinion, especially when cosmetic, but this was a necessary thing to you considering it earnt you money. The function of the chip worked like this: every person is assigned biometric numerical values by the government of their country, this is to make controlling their finances easier without having a physical device like a debit card or a mobile phone. Instead each user is assigned these numerical values based on their facial bone structure, and the chip's job was to scan this using minute sensors. All you had to do was simply wave your hand in the direct vicinity of their face, and await results - those results being the chip draining their bank account of credit and depositing it into yours. The waving part is complicated in normal use, but when at a club, where wild dancing is the norm, it makes hand movements so much less conspicuous. As you imagine the small amounts of money gradually making its way into your account a man approaches you to your side.

The guy has long-ish dark brown hair, with eyes of the same colour and a tall stature. He begins dancing near you, slowly moving closer and closer towards your vicinity. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t attracted to this man, he was objectively good looking, and the smirk he was wearing on his face was hard to ignore. Before you know it, he’s leaning in your ear and shout-whispering: “hey, do you wanna get a drink with me, angel?” The confidence in him to skip all normal greetings is astounding to you, but in some ways that makes him even more attractive to you, so you whisper-shout back “yeah!” and lead him over to the bar by the elbow.

After you have a few drinks in you, dancing becomes thoughtless, and swaying and grinding on the nameless man is even easier. “Yo, what’s your name?” You ask over the pulsing beat. His response is a finger trailing up your spine with the words ‘Johnny’ leaving his lips. Maybe those disquieting thoughts aren’t only silenced by daydreaming, maybe this could be another outlet. That thought curls in your mind, the wispy tendrils of a coherent thought fading like a misty night.

A few more drinks in your systems leads you to going home with the man, but your memories fade away as the night (or should you say early morning?) carries on. It passes by in a blur and the next thing you know you’re being startled awake by a cat sitting on your chest, with an unearthly headache.

Once you finally manage to extricate yourself from the cat’s grasps, you sit up and immediately notice the sleeping form of Johnny next to you on the tatami, his chest rising and falling with each breath. As quietly as you can, you tiptoe up off the tatami floor, acknowledge the ache throughout your entire body and move towards his kitchenette for a glass of water. Unbeknownst to you, Johnny apparently has a rudely noisy water purifying outlet attached to his faucet, and it decides to make itself known the moment you hover your palm over the on sensor. Johnny quickly stirs awake at the noise, and he sleepily opens his eyes in your direction.

“Wha-what’s going on?” He asks, squinting as his dark eyes adjust to the light. “Oh, I’m sorry, I was just trying to get some water.” You respond, tottering back over to the tatami, glass of water in hand. “Um, I’m sorry, I don’t really remember much of last night, did we uh- what did we do?” You’re aware your question was haphazard, but the incessant hangover looming in your head has your thoughts less than clear.

“If you are wondering if we had sex, the answer is yes, but the only thing I remember is waking up covered in… unsavoury stuff...so that certainly was a way of knowing how. I also know that apparently at some part of the night we decided to dream ‘cause I had to tidy up the gear earlier, but to put any worries at bay, I’m clean and vaccinated so...yeah.” He finishes the end of his sentence, trailing off. Well, at least the mystery man is somewhat of a gentleman, and he’s not gonna give you anything nasty which is always a good thing. You realise his late night cleaning must’ve turned to yourself at some point considering you are somewhat dressed and clean, but you can’t find it in you to care, you’d come to this shameful point so what did a bit of aftercare matter.

“Oh ok, and thanks for letting me know. I’m clean and fully vaccinated too.” You respond, unsure how to act around him. Perhaps he feels your apprehension, and in answer he pats a spot on the tatami next to him, just away from his cat too. You make your way over to the spot, feet padding on the floor as you go. “Your cat’s cute, they decided to sit on my chest this morning. Despite knocking the breath out of me, they’re pretty charming.” Johnny’s eyes widen at this knowledge before throwing his head back and letting out a hearty laugh. It’s somewhat comforting to hear such a genuine laugh; it takes your mind off the world of insincerity around you.

“I apologise for Ten, he gets cuddly in the mornings.” Johnny picks up his cat to give you more space, Ten’s legs sprawling wide in the air before being put down to safety.

There’s something so warm and familiar about Johnny’s presence, it has you naturally leaning into him, and his arm comes to rest around your shoulders as your head gently leans on his chest. The feeling is just so warm and despite knowing you don’t know him well, it almost feels like you do. It feels like a lover long lost, and now he has returned a warm feeling spreads throughout your chest. It’s almost inexplicable, and if you were to try to justify it to anyone other than yourself, a wave of embarrassment would certainly wash over you.

Looking down at you, he meets your eyes, and they seem somewhat fond; not what you were expecting to see. “Do you fancy dreamin’?” He asks, still maintaining eye contact? “Hmm, sure, hopefully I’ll remember it this time.” You reply with a smile and he reciprocates.

Before you even open your eyes you’re met with the sensation of skin on skin. Beneath your fingertips you feel, what you suppose is a firm chest, and when you open your eyes your suspicions are confirmed. Your hands are resting on Johnny’s taut chest, and of course this is what an unscripted dream with the two of you looks like. You feel that you are naked too, and his hands rest gently around your waist, a relaxing gentle weight reassuring you he’s still there. You meet each other’s eyes and the tension is palpable in the air. He dips his head down and kisses you, lips melting together with ease. His hands move from their placing and trail down to cup the small of your back, your bodies meeting infinitely closer.

The two of you move together like jigsaw pieces slotting into place, there’s no conscious thoughts, only the two of you existing in this dream space. Part of you can feel Johnny’s thoughts swirling as you share the hazy unstructured scape. There’s hints of lust mixed with a sleepy mindset, probably left over from waking up moments ago in the real world. He’s set on being a lazy lover right now, selfishly devouring you with no haste in any of his actions, just taking these moments for himself. He can feel your thoughts just as much as you can feel his, he knows you’re feeling relaxed with him and he’s pleased at that, he knows how good you feel right now and he’s proud. He wants to use all of this time to make you feel good. You’re both in agreement that losing yourself in each other is ever so easy, and so you both fall into the other's grasps.

The second time you wake up, Ten is resting on your feet, warming them from the slight chill of the room. Johnny had roused quicker than you, and he’d already removed the IV from your arm. You spot him winding up the fluid bags and putting them into the insulated case they reside in. “How are you feeling?” He asks whilst disposing of the needles in the marked sharps box. “Good, lighter than usual. I’ve enjoyed spending time with you, albeit mostly imaginary.”

The floaty feeling remains in the forefront of your consciousness. Despite feeling lighter, less burdened, you’re aware that you need to change your vices. Constantly daydreaming, forming relationships through them, isn’t healthy. Continuous escapism isn’t a way to live; numbing yourself over and over again won’t solve anything. With a new fervor to gain meaning in your life, you rise from your place on the tatami. “What are your plans for today, John?” You ask, perhaps vices and meaning aren’t that different from each other.

long time no see! this is my penultimate fic :(( hopefully u guys enjoyed it! I know it’s not like my usual style and is somewhat offbeat but I hope it makes sense hehe <3

[sharkfish]

love ‘em, can’t live without ‘em: early-career writers!

[masterpost of rec lists]

new content creators are the lifeblood of fandom, so here i present stories by folks who have five or less destiel fics published (...so far) as of december 2020!!! 

please give them some love!!! 

under the cut since it got long~ 

the burden of belonging by Newtondale @soft-klaus (8k)

Dean doesn't know where he's going, he just drives.

He meanders. Takes whatever road he wants without worrying about efficiency or speed. He watches the landscape change around him as he heads east, towards the sea. Sometimes he listens to music, and sometimes he doesn’t. Most of the time he just thinks, the way he has always thought best; with an open road ahead and horror close behind.

Cas always comes back to him. Cas has always come back. Whether it takes minutes, or weeks, or months - Cas comes back to him.

But Cas hasn’t come back. How much longer is supposed to wait? Minutes? Months? How long is he supposed to live like this, like there’s nothing else that matters except the space beside him where Cas should be?

So he just drives.

Dean Winchester’s 12-Step Guide to Inebriated Online Retail Therapy for Fallen Angels and Judgemental Brothers With Bad Hair (Suck It, Sammy) by justholdingstill @justholdingstill   (3k) 

Alternatively titled Dean Wayne: The Life & Legend

Dean gets drunk. Dean orders things online. Hilarity ensues.

Hang-Ups by anupalya @anupalya (2k)

A slip of the tongue while hanging up a zoom meeting with Castiel leaves Dean in a panic.

****

Jsksdjdjskal

I'm starting to think you're letting Blueberry walk over your keyboard again.

i'm moving to Thailand

?????

I have to

Dean

I have no choice

... so I take it the meeting went well?

dream root & fumbling through the darkness by visionsofyerface @omnishamblegreg (1.3k)

Dean takes dream root for some fun angsty wanderings into Cas’s head, and then actually goes to the Empty, but Cas doesn't believe it's really him.

How Long? by MinxyOne93 @substitutesalt93 (WIP - 37k)

Dean has been going on reckless hunts by himself. Cas confronts him and all those years of unresolved pining come to a boiling point.

_

"Dean. How long?" The angel said, still quiet but so raw with emotion, eyes still wide with shock.

Dean looked down at the floor and sighed. "Since... always. I knew it for sure in Purgatory. But always." He then added in a near whisper, tears threatening to spill from behind his now closed eyelids, "I'm sorry, Cas."

"Sorry? You're sorry?" Castiel felt dumbfounded. The constant loneliness and longing he had sensed from Dean that seemed to grow worse and worse with the passing of years made so much more sense now.

"Dean," was all Cas could say before releasing his grip on his collar and gently, slowly, deliberately, kissing the corner of his mouth. A shocked gasp left Dean’s mouth of its own accord and he melted into Castiel's tight embrace.

It's The Thought That Counts by oceaxe @oceaxe-ifdawn (3k)

It’s Dean’s birthday and while angels have no birthdays, Castiel has a) been around human cultures for long enough to be aware of the nearly universal customs of celebrating the anniversary of a loved one’s birth and b) has been living with humans for long enough that he’s been included in some of those celebrations. But the art of gift-giving continues to elude his comprehension.

Lucky Winner by natmoose @natmoose (32k)

Dean wins a trip to Paris. In and of itself, that’s an amazing thing, but the problem is: he isn’t in a relationship with Lisa anymore, and the trip requires a romantic partner. The obvious choice is Cas, his roommate and best friend of 3 years, but coming with that are some very very complicated feelings and things Dean absolutely doesn’t want to deal with.

But Dean isn’t selfish and also really wants to give his overworked best friend a well deserved holiday, so the only and best solution is to take Cas to Paris, romantic theme be damned. What Dean doesn’t know is that their whole trip will be documented by a photographer from the company - so to avoid their vacation being cut short, Dean and Cas will have to convincingly play a couple.

Once Upon a Falling Star by GrandestBlood @grumpy-mccat (WIP - 3k) 

Alternate outcome for season 5's Endverse where Castiel never lost his grace but he was tricked to retreat back to heaven with the other angels, leaving Dean behind in the refugee camp.

Prompt for this was: The world has ended 500 years ago. You finally went back to Earth and discovered a voice message. You learn a shocking secret about 500 years ago.

Sending A Message by ivebeenpossessedbysatan @ivebeenpossessedbysatan (WIP - 15k)

Castiel Novak didn't expect to be kidnapped. Sure, he'd seen it happen before, but that was all in movies. Just because his mother had married into money didn't mean that someone was actually going to kidnap him and try to ransom him for money.

Only apparently it did, because here he was, tied to a chair in the corner of the most cliché warehouse he'd ever seen.

Why was this is life?

so leave me // at the roadside by LinkInThePark @saminzat (3k)

”This was exactly what he had been trying to avoid. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone out on his own at all, but he was tired of sitting around in the bunker, where the walls seemed to close in on him and the halls were too empty at the same time. Where everything reminded him of what had happened, of the battles they had fought and the people they had lost.

Of the words left unsaid.”

Dean is taking the Impala on a ride, trying to escape everything that's happened... And, in the process, is finally forced to confront his grief. 15x19 coda.

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, but Words Might Get Me Laid by Mrs King of Hell (Slytherkins) @slytherkins (3k)

When Dean's name calling goes too far, Castiel decides to teach him a lesson in manners.

"Take a Sad Song and Make it Better" by Shishquah_CustardTree @shishquahcustardtree (WIP - 27k) 

After being bought and abused by Alistair for many years, Dean Winchester finally gets another chance at life and love by the means of a car crash and a bullet.

The One (1) Time Dean Winchester Tried Something New by archangelgabe @3dg310rdsupreme (2k)

What fun is a relationship that doesn't start with the gross misunderstanding that your crush is hitting on your kid brother?

The one where they get heaven-married by mercurialkitty @mercurialkitty (1.3k)

First a quick chat with Sam in the Impala, then it's off to find Cas.

A finale fix-it where Dean and Cas get heaven-married

There'll Be Peace When You Are Done by diaryofageekgirl @diaryofageekgirl  (5k) 

Somehow, in the middle of severing vamp necks in the dead of night in a run-down barn in Ohio, Dean had a revelation.

Or: nothing stays dead on Supernatural.

This is heaven by madbrilliant84 @madbrilliant84 (800)

“Come on dude! Don’t tell me you don’t know what your legs look like! I bet you could crush melons with those.”

Cas seemed incredibly amused by this. “And that’s something that turns you on?”

Dean smiled while biting is bottom lip. He slowly nodded. His playful tone dropped to something more heated.

“Uh huh. First thing I noticed when I saw you sitting on that bar stool.”

You're Not Alone by Wordsintothevoid @deancas-stan (15k)

Dean has an imaginary friend. Sure, that's weird as hell but he doesn't care. Cas has been there to support him during every horrible thing in Dean's short miserable life and he is not giving up Cas. Sure, Dean may also sorta kinda be in love with him. Oops. And it hurts but Dean will keep it platonic. But then Cas leaves. And then Dean breaks.

We’ll All Arrive in Heaven Alive by invisibledrugs @reasonsweweresinging (1k)

The Winchesters are finally dying, and for good.

But that's okay, because Dean knows what - and who - is waiting for him.

last but definitely not least, @uncastiel doesn’t have any fics yet but is taking prompts! 

[bb-tings]

unspoken magic - drew starkey

magic - gabrielle aplin 

(10/10 reccomend ALL HER MUSIC)

so i found this song on spotify while i was looking for a song to write a cute fluffy drew fic to and it gave me such drew vibes bc homeboy doesn’t know how to use any form of social media lol...also the rant is literally me. like my thoughts and actions and beliefs. some of yall 13 year olds really don’t know the meaning of BOUNDARIES.

...anyways enjoy,

-BRI

if you want to join or get taken off the taglist just let me know in my messages or in the comments 😊

taglist: @ampanonyg @ims0golden @jjsmentalpolaroids @stargazingstarkey @letsgofullkook @jjmbanks @maybanksbaby @1-800-jjslut  @simpforstarkey @jellyfishbeansontoast

Remember when we snuck out of your birthday, didn't even say goodbye, 'Cause even there in a room full of faces, all I saw was you and I

     Everyone was having a blast dancing around, drinking, laughing. It was Drew’s birthday after all. The cast had decided to rent out a club and invite family and friends, including everyone who worked on set, the workers have become more like family than colleagues. There was so much chaos going on and while Y/n was so proud of the cast and herself for pulling the event off for her boyfriend, she couldn’t help but feel a little antisocial. She was a social butterfly, but everyone knew that after days of being the life of the party and extroverted, she needed time alone and started to shut down, wanting to be alone. Y/n was so excited for the party but when it came time for her to get dressed up and drunk with her friends, she found herself sitting alone on a couch booth while sipping wine, not really seeing the fun in getting wasted and stupid drunk. 

     Y/n watched as Drew and Rudy drunkenly danced back to back, screaming out the words to OMG by Usher, she laughed as he made eye contact with the young girl and pointed to her, wiggling his finger for her to join him. She held her glass up and tried giving him a believable smile, but the older boy knew better, so he made his way over to her.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Drew slid his way next to his girlfriend and used the towel on the table to wipe the sweat off of his face. “Did somebody upset you?”

“Nothing bubba, I’m fine.”

      Y/n looked up from her short-lived attempt at avoiding Drew’s eyes to him already looking at her. She watched as his hand moved toward her hair as he pushed a fallen piece behind her ear. He looked around her face and finally met her eyes, not believing her. “I’m fine, Drew. I promise.”

     Drew sat back away from her as he let out a loud sigh. “Why do you do that? Why do you lie to my face and tell me that you’re ok like I’m going to buy it? Why can’t you just tell me the truth?”

     “Drew, I really don’t wanna do this right now,” the young girl pleaded. “It’s your birthday, can’t we just have a good time and not worry about me right now?” To that Drew looked at his other half like she had grown another half. 

     “Ok, first of all, this,” He moved his finger quickly in the small space between them. “This Is not a fight. This is me being upset because my girlfriend won’t let me worry about her. I guess she doesn’t know how relationships work.” Drew teased the girl with a small smile on his face. “And second, we both know that I can’t have a good time if you’re sitting over here all sad and mopey.”

It's all the words you never say, the way I catch you watchin' me, I know that you love me, i know you can feel the magic, we don't need to talk about

     After a little back and forth, the young boy had finally gotten the girl to spill the truth about needing some alone time and was now trying to sneak them out of his own birthday party. As the pair rode home, Y/n couldn’t help but look at Drew as he stared ahead. She watched as his changing blue eyes flickered between the path in front of him and the many cars behind him, also driving in the early hours of the morning. 

     Though there were many signs, lights, and flashes that caught her mind’s attention, basically begging her eyes to look, she couldn’t help but only see Drew. This was her favorite kind of Drew. When he is totally unbothered. He was doing something so simple, something that he had been doing since he turned 15, now 27 it only seems right that he should be used to it. However, Y/n couldn’t help to notice how he put all his effort into it, eyes never once leaving the road, she liked to believe that it was his way of self consciously protecting her. And even though she thought she was going unnoticed, the young girl wasn’t the only one admiring from not so far. Drew was watching her too but through his peripheral. He loved that she was enchanted by everything he did. He liked knowing that he wasn’t the only one completely and hopelessly in love. 

No, we don't feel the need for colorful displays, 'cause it's not the kind of game we play, and why should we show the world how we feel, when it's not about them anyway

     Everyone was over at Madelyn’s apartment chilling and hanging out with one another. The blonde was stationed on the floor in between the couch and the coffee table, with a live Instagram leaning on a few books. Y/n was sitting directly behind the girl, turned to the side with her legs pulled up to her chest. She had let Maddie use her phone, the 22-year-old being too lazy to walk to her room and get hers, so now she was just watching as Madelyn socialized with the fans. 

“Ow, shit.” 

     Y/n turned her head to see Drew sitting on the edge of the couch next to her holding his foot with a worried stare. The younger girl let out a small snort. “Did you hit your toe bub?” 

     Drew let out a whiny noise and Maddie proceeded to also let out a laugh, then reusing one of her famous lines, “Never heard anyone whine like that before.” Y/n gently pushed the girl’s shoulder, teasingly telling her to leave the big baby alone. She then returned her vision to the raging comment section. Her once big smile quickly fading to a frown.

I think its a PR stunt bc they don’t even act like a couple

Drew deserves someone who actually loves him...LIKE ME!

gUys she called him bUb! THATS SO CUTE (emoji)

Nah thats def apr stunt, more obvious than shawn and camila

I don’t eleven think i’ve seen them hold hands

     Madelyn and Y/n simultaneously rolled their eyes, the blonde looking up at her best friend gave her a look that spoke “you gonna tell em or me.”

     Y/n slid down from the couch and joined her friend on the floor, getting right in front of the camera. She looked up at her loving boyfriend who was on his phone also looking at the comments on the live. He glanced down towards Y/n and gave her a small smile, telling her to go for it. It wasn’t the first time they had seen comments like this and he knew it wouldn’t be the last but he also knew that she had been dying to rant about it. 

     “Alright, I’m gonna go ahead and say this one thing, and then I’m probably going to take some time off this app.” The young actress slowly took a deep breath and then began her rant. “ Alright, first of all, my relationship with ANYONE, is between me and that person. Just because I have friends, boyfriends or family, does not mean that I have to post them on this account. I understand that it’s hard to believe that 2 people can be happy and healthy unless they showcase it to the rest of the world, but it is in fact very possible. So for everyone who is questioning, my relationship,” the girl then grabbed Drew’s hand, pulling him down to her side of the couch until he was laying on his side behind her head. “This is Drew. My boyfriend. It’s not a publicity stunt, it’s not to get the show more popular, it’s real. Outer Banks is already the number one show on Netflix, so I don’t really think there would be a point to put 2 people in a fake relationship. And another thing, I don’t even have a fucking publicist, so I don’t really know where that came from.” 

     The young girl turned her head to meet Drew’s blue eyes, he looked at her with such satisfaction and amazement. He was proud of his younger girlfriend. For years Drew thought that he would never find someone who was anti-social media like him. He thought that he was just going to have to bare his relationships getting exploited all over the world. Drew was happy that he never had to worry about that with Y/n. 

     “I completely understand why it’s confusing and how you can question our relationship. But that doesn’t mean you can drag our relationship, and me particularly, down. You have no right to say the things you do about me, just because you think that the small, tiny, look into our lives means that I don’t love and care about Drew. Like, no offense, but that’s fucking insane. I’m tired of getting private messages about my weight, my clothes, my hair, my AGE. Don’t even get me started on the age difference. Half of the fan accounts on this app are run by 13-year-olds saying very inappropriate things about a 27-year-old grown-ass man. Like yall understand that’s illegal right. Like, get it through your head that those are fantasies and no matter HOW MANY TIMES you drag ME down, they will NEVER come true. My age isn’t anyone’s business, I’m over 18 so get over it.” Y/n then let out a loud sigh. “I need a damn drink.” 

     To this Drew laughed and kissed her on the cheek, while the other cast members started to whoop and holler while applauding the young girl’s words. They too were proud other, they knew of the struggles that she went through and they knew that most of the time she kept those feelings balled up. Madelyn then grabbed the phone and said her goodbyes to the live, then ending it. 

     The blonde then wrapped her arms around her best friend. “I’m so proud of you, babe. That was so badass.”  Madison saw the interaction from across the room and ran over to join them, adding herself to the hug. 

     “It was great, sissy. You really told them who’s boss.” That last comment made Y/n laugh out loud. She was so happy to have a supporting friend and cast group that made her feel loved. She couldn’t have asked for better friends. 

     “It was pretty hot too,” Drew smirked and pulled the young girl away from the group hug and grabbed her face, and gave her a long passionate kiss, something he rarely did in front of others. “I’m proud of you bubba.”

She couldn’t have asked for better friends. 

Or a better boyfriend. 

Don't need to see it to believe it, no need to wake me up, 'cause I'm not dreamin'

     The couple was laying in their bed just enjoying each other’s presence. Limbs all spread around but managing to stay intertwined. Sunlight was seeping into the white-painted room, brightening everything up, including the pair’s mood. Drew was leaning against the headboard very lazily, running his hands through Y/n’s hair,  who was sitting in his lap, thighs down beside his knees, with her head on his chest. Drew had woken up early and tried to get the younger girl out of bed, but she refused to do so. So he decided that he would just deal with it and let her drift back off to sleep, but with a twist.

     It humored the young actor that people thought they weren’t a cuddly and touchy couple. They were absolutely a touchy couple, they just didn’t enjoy being touchy in front of others, some people not being into that and they didn’t want to make anyone feel awkward. It was more a Drew thing. He was the one who suggested they not have a lot of PDA, and while Y/n was all for PDA, she would do anything for Drew to make him happy. At the beginning of their relationship, Y/n was insecure about Drew’s real feelings because he didn’t show much love through touch, but she eventually mentioned it to him. Ever since then he always made it a point to show more affection the second they were alone. Hints their situation now. 

     Drew watched as Y/n started to stir in her sleep. She started to whine and Drew felt her chest start to move a little faster. She was having another nightmare. 

     “Shhh, shhh. You’re ok, it’s ok,” the young man started to rub her back and hold her a little tighter. He wanted the nightmare to stop but he didn’t want to ruin her sleep. “It’s just a dream. You’re ok, bubba.” Drew closed his eyes and gave a small smile when he felt her calm down, turn her head the other direction and hold onto him a little tighter. Despite what the young girl believed, Drew loved the affection that she gave him. Being the oldest of 3 kids, the boy felt like he had to grow up fast and while he knew his parents loved them all equally, he got less of the affection. He had to grow up and become a little man, help his mom prepare dinner, he and logan had to help take care of Brooke and Mackayla. He just thought that he wasn’t a fan to touch, but when it came to Y/n’s touch he couldn’t get enough of it.  

     Drew closed his eyes and relaxed his body, trying to drift off to sleep himself.  He knew he wasn’t dreaming yet, but he never wanted to leave this dream state with her. Getting to love someone like her, was something Drew never even dreamed of but now he was thankful for that. Because no dream could have lived up to the life that he gets to live with the girl that he loves.

[come-on-shitty-boys]

//goodbye, my princess. akaashi keiji//

Request:  Throne Room Thursdays yay!! Could I request Knight!Akaashi and Princess!Reader with the prompt “I vowed to your dying father to keep you safe, so get the fuck behind me.”

Warnings: Blood/Violence

Word Count: 1.8K

Notes: This was literally supposed to be like 800 words.  How did I get here? also me shamelessly writing a prologue to my Oikawa fic that went up today O O P S

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.  Everything had been peaceful for so long, so why now?  What about the peace treaty?  Did that piece of paper mean nothing?  It had been so long since the first time that you had heard your people’s screams and cries for help.  But, now ten years later, those mournful screams were echoing all around you again.  The clang of metal on metal as swords were swung in a heated battle to save the kingdom.  

They had come in the night, cloaked in inky darkness, to launch their attack.  The loud noise of a projectile coming into contact with the palace gates being the only warning that they had arrived.  And within minutes, he was there.  Just like he always was when there was the threat of danger.  His normally messy black curls looked even wilder as he had been yanked from his sleep.  Those normally tired eyes carried an extra wave of exhaustion, but nothing could mask the looks of distress evident on his face.  Akaashi Keiji had been peacefully sleeping before he was called to do his rounds of duty, but the sudden crash that had the ground shaking beneath his feet had jolted him awake.  The other knights around him were scrambling to get their armor back on.  It was the hurried mannerisms of those around him that had him quickly on his feet, his armor clanking heavily with every step as he ran towards the main section of the castle.  The princess.

Akaashi could see the banner of the Riviere Kingdom rustiling steadily in the breeze of the night.  An enemy no one could’ve anticipated, but here they were, trying to storm the castle anyway.  His heavy hand on your door accompanied his desperate pleas.  “Princess Y/N!  Princess, are you alright?”  He was expecting a lot of things, honestly.  He was expecting you to be fearful, the memories of the last attack plaguing your mind.  He was expecting tears and gentle shakes of your body.  Akaashi, however, was not expecting you to fling yourself onto him when you pulled open the door.  The sudden momentum had him stumbling back, but he still wrapped his arms tightly around you, letting you bury your face into his neck.  “Princess, we’re under attack.  I need to get you to the safe house.”

“What about my parents?  Are they coming with us?”

“No, my princess.  I was given the orders that if this day were to come, look out only for you.  I’m sorry, but I assure you that the other knights will escort them as well.  Come, we don’t have much time.”

And with a slow nod, you took his outstretched hand and let him lead you away, down, down, down spirals of stairs.  From above, the sounds of battle began to intensify, fear halting you in your tracks.  “Princess, I know that you’re worried about the king and queen, but please, we must keep moving,” Akaashi pleads, tugging your hand gently.  

It was only then when the shouts of soldiers began to echo through the darkness that Akaashi Keiji halted in his steps too.  The grip that he had on your hand tightened fiercely, the slowly darkening look on his face was illuminated by the low torch light.  There were heavy footsteps, dozens of them, all coming closer and closer to your very location.  He pushed the torch into your hands, drawing his broadsword from its sheath.  “I need you to make a promise to me, your highness.  From this moment forward, you will do exactly what I say.  If I tell you to run, you run and you will not look back.  If I tell you to hide, you put out that torch and hide.  Don’t come out until I say so, do you understand?  Can you promise me that?”

“Akaashi-”

“It is my duty to protect you at all costs and that is what I’m going to do.  Your life is much more valuable than mine and I will do everything in my power to protect it.  Please, make me this promise, Princess.”

 “I promise, Akaashi, but only if you promise that you will come back to me.  I don’t want to lose you.”

The knight that had been by your side since you were fifteen could feel his heart pounding in his chest.  He had been with you every step of the way and there were times when it felt like more than just a work-only relationship.  The way that you joked around with him while he watched over you during your equestrian lessons, the light punches to his arm when he whispered some snarky remark back to you.  There was so much laughter and joy that encompassed the two of you that this moment was such a startling comparison, but his first priority right now was to keep you safe, not place that long-desired kiss to your plush lips.  “I can’t promise you that, but I swear on my life that I will do what I can to make you happy." 

Your hand reached up to gently stroke his cheek and in the dim lighting Akaashi could still make out the sorrow written in your eyes, unshed tears glistening softly.  This shouldn’t be happening, not now.  You should be asleep, head resting on your down pillows, nestled under your blankets, preparing for another day of lessons and carrying out your other royal duties, but instead he was pulling you through the dark tunnel system beneath the castle in an attempt to get you away from your home that was crumbling to the ground with every passing second.  

“Halt!” A voice barks through the darkness.

“Princess, get behind me,” Akaashi mutters softly, but you were frozen in your spot, body too stiff to even make an attempt to move.  His hand gripped the back of your dress, roughly tugging you back, shielding your body with his own.  “I made a vow to your father and this kingdom to protect you, so get the fuck behind me and when I tell you to run, you need to run, are we clear?”  That sudden icy edge to his voice caught you off guard.  He was normally so gentle, so teasing in all of his remarks, but this was a new side to your knight that you had never seen.  This was your knight in the brink of battle, sword drawn, ready to do whatever he had to do to withhold his job as your protector.  

“Hand over the princess.”

“Not a chance in hell.”

“Don’t make this difficult on yourself, boy.  You can comply with us or we’ll be forced to do this the messy way, and I’m sure you wouldn’t want that.”

“I am Akaashi Keiji, loyal knight to the Gledria Kingdom.  I take orders from my king and my king only and I was ordered to protect the princess no matter the cost, so I guess we’ll have to do this the messy way.”

The Riviere knight clicked his tongue, shaking his head slowly as he pulled his own sword from his sheath.  “Bad choice, boy.”

Akaashi’s sword raised to deflect the incoming blade, the clangs of metal on metal echoing through the tunnel.  A quick shove and a well aimed kick to the center of the chest sent the other man stuttering back, a devilish smirk adorning Akaashi’s lips.  

And it should’ve stayed that way.  The tides should’ve been in his favor.  He was younger, faster, smarter, but the flat of a sword aimed expertly into his side had him doubled over from the pain of the impact, the joints of the armor leaving just a sliver of skin exposed.

But, that was all it took.

It was a sickening sound, really.  The metal piercing through flesh, the sharp breathless gasp escaping Akaashi’s pretty lips as he fell to his knees.  That soft “Run”  that struggled to pass as he just fell further onto the ground, one hand still gripping his sword, trying to fight the best he could, the other pressing firmly into his side to try to stop the blood gushing from the fresh wound.  

But, despite everything he had told you, you couldn’t run.  You couldn’t just leave him here to die alone in a dark tunnel where no one would find him until his corpse started to rot and smell up the entire palace.  “K-keiji-” You whispered, falling to your knees beside him, trying to cradle his body against yours, but you were only shoved away with a firm arm.

“I told you-” he paused, searching for air, “to run.  Please-”

“Then you have to come with me, Keiji, please.  I can’t make it all on my own.  I’ll help you, but please, get up, Keiji.”

He weakly shakes his head, but when you pull his body back towards you, he doesn’t have the strength to oppose.  He knew this day would come.  The day when he would finally be forced to leave you, but he just never expected it to be this soon or to happen like this.  He had always imagined it to be sending you off with a warm smile as you were taken to your new home in the Riviere Kingdom.  Cradled in your arms, bleeding all over your silken nightgown as his vision wavered was the goodbye that he never anticipated.  “I-I’m sorry, my princess.”

“I know, Keiji, I know, but please, don’t speak.  Save your strength so we can run away, okay?”  The sleepy smile graced his features as he gazed up at you, eyelids becoming heavier with each second.  Your hot tears streamed down your cheeks and dripped onto his face.  “Please, stay with me.  I’m not ready to say goodbye.  Keiji, please,” you whisper, desperation creeping into each and every plea that you uttered to your fallen knight.  

It was almost automatic, the way you leaned over him and pressed your lips to his, finally being able to kiss the knight who had been with you through so much.  He released a weak laugh as you pulled away from him.  “What was that for?”

“Because I love you.  I always have.  No one has ever made me smile like you have and no one ever will.  Please, just hold on, Keiji.”

“Well, I hate to ruin this beautiful moment, but seize the princess,” the Riviere knight ordered.  It was only a few seconds, before you felt hands wrap around your upper arms, hoisting you to your feet, letting Keiji’s slowly dying form fall the rest of the way to the ground.  

“What? No! Let me go! Please!” You shout, struggling to escape the tight grip, but no amount of protesting was stopping the soldiers from dragging you away from the scene, your desperate pleas mixed with sobs echoing off the walls and into the dying knights ears.  “Keiji!”

“Goodbye, my princess.”

[danyka-fendyr]

Don’t Call Me Pumpkin

Hey everyone! So, I’m determined to put out my promised 3 Spencer Reid Halloween fics, but also I’m a lazy hoe. Which brings us to where we are now. Me, watching The Haunting of Hill House, writing a Spencer Reid Halloween fic that takes place on a pumpkin farm. Because I desperately want to go to a pumpkin farm even though there is not one even anywhere remotely near me because I live in one of the sunniest places in the world now and pumpkins would DIE here. This has not been edited. Fight me.

Wordcount: 1681

Permanent Taglist: @dreamwritesimagines @rhabakoli

Warnings: None. All fluff. A little bit of innuendo.

“Spence, seriously, where are you taking me?”

“Somewhere fun,” he promised.

“C’mon. At least give me a vague statistic for a hint baby.” 

You fussed with the blindfold Spencer had reluctantly put on you. He hadn’t wanted to, but you had been more than up for it since you loved a good surprise. Spencer rarely surprised you, so you knew the surprise factor had to be important to him. Hence one of his purple ties currently being on your face.

“Okay.” You could hear him blushing from being called baby. “Over 800 million of what we’re going to see are currently available in the U.S.”

“Oh my gosh you’re taking me to a strip club?”

“No!” Spencer frantically objected.

You laughed. “I was kidding, Spence. I know that’s not your thing. You prefer blindfolds, right?”

You wiggled your partially obscured eyebrows.

“Sweetheart,” he whined.

“Hey, you know there’s no judgment from me. I hate handcuffs, so we’re even. But seriously, are we almost there?” 

“Yeah, we are. Just a couple more minutes.”

You could hear gravel crunching under the wheels of the car, and you were forced to wonder once again where you were. Knowing your boyfriend, he could have taken you anywhere. He was almost never spontaneous, which only served to make his spontaneity more so. After a few moments, you felt the car come to a stop, and you couldn’t contain your grin.

“Are we here?”

“Your use of the present tense on the word here would indicate that you already know we are, in fact, here.”

“You’re right, I do. Now get me out of this car so we can do a dramatic blindfold removal!”

Spencer laughed before coming over to your side of the car and opening the door for you, taking your hand and helping you out. He placed his hands on your shoulders, steering you forward towards wherever he planned on taking off this blindfold, while you didn’t even bother trying to contain your smile. It smelled like dirt, and you had a few theories as to where you might be.

“Okay, are you ready?” He asked.

“No. There’s one more thing I want to do before you take off the blindfold. Can you turn me around?”

Confused, Spencer did as you asked, and you carefully placed your hands on his face so you had an idea of where you were going before you leaned forward and kissed him. Tasted like coffee and cinnamon, just like he always did. You could do this all day, but you had a surprise to get to, so you pulled back.

“What was that for?”

“So I could see if I liked it.” You shrugged.

“...Well? Did you?” He asked.

“Baby, I always like kissing you. Now let’s do this thing.”

“Okay pumpkin,” he said.

Every fiber in your body stiffened as it hit you. Spencer never called you pumpkin. You had to drive a while, certainly long enough to get out of the city. It smelled like fresh dirt.

At the same moment he removed the blindfold, you yelled, “Babe! Don’t call me pumpkin!”

You pouted, glaring over your shoulder at his handsome, handsome face.

“I waited until we were here!” He justified.

“Still ruined the whole surprise.” You sighed, staring out at the vast fields of pumpkins before you.

“Is it ruined if I say we can pick out any pumpkin you want?”

You gasped, suddenly giddy. “Can we get multiple pumpkins?”

“Whatever you want, love.”

“I love you!” You threw your arms around him, letting him catch you.

He laughed, setting you down again after a moment. “C’mon, let’s go.”

You two made your way through the pumpkin patches, and you both inspected every pumpkin that came your way. You had gone pumpkin hunting with Spencer before, so you knew how this worked. He was looking for a pumpkin that matched certain characteristics he had in mind, the most halloweeny pumpkin, the pumpkin to rule over all other pumpkins if you will. You, on the other hand, were looking for something a little bit less exact. You were on the hunt for your pumpkin.

You never knew what it was going to look like, but every year, you went in search of the pumpkin that was right for you. It called to you, in all of its sweet orange glory, a bright beacon in the midst of all of these other pedestrian pumpkins. It was somewhere in this field, waiting for you to find it. Your pumpkin soulmate, if you will, ready to be taken home with your more human soulmate.

“Do you see anything?” Spencer asked you.

Some years, you found your pumpkin in the first sweep of the fields. You would see it and you would just immediately know. Last year had been one of those years, and Spencer had come to dread them since they meant him wandering a pumpkin patch with a very heavy pumpkin in his arms that you insisted was your baby and that no one else could have. This year was not to be one of those years though.

“No. Not yet. Which is kind of a bummer since I was hoping to check you out. I didn’t get to stare at you in the car like I usually do. My day feels incomplete without a chance to drool over you. I’ve been deprived.”

Spencer blushed. He was so easily flustered. It was one of the things you had loved about him, even before you started dating. The cute little way his ears would turn red and he would stare down at his feet, fix his tie. Today he wasn’t wearing a tie though, instead, just a sweater that you knew was very, very soft from all the times you had stolen it from him. 

“C’mon silly. Let’s go look for your elusive pumpkin.”

“You’re deflecting Dr. Reid,” you sing-songed.

“I am not deflecting, I am prioritizing. Can you think of anything more important than pumpkins right now?”

“You.”

An easy answer, and it made him blush again. It was going to be a great day.

It was set to be a great day regardless though. The sky was the perfect shade of cloudless, washed-out blue, almost gray, and the air was perfectly crisp. The dirt in the pumpkin patch was exactly the right consistency between dry and muddy, and overall, conditions seemed to be perfect. Plus Spencer knew how cold you got and made sure you had dressed appropriately.

You two wandered through the pumpkin fields for hours. It took Spencer a long time to find his pumpkin. He was pretty hardcore about exactly how long the vine had to be. You put him to shame though.

“Seriously love? Nothing yet?” Spencer said around a rather rotund pumpkin.

“No. But we’re close. I can feel it.” 

You had been saying this for the past three hours since you had arrived.

“All I’m saying is, maybe we could take a break. I could take this guy back to the car, we could buy some apple cider...I hear it’s really good here.”

Your boyfriend’s persuasion meant nothing to you though, as you stopped dead in your tracks.

“That’s it.”

“What, the apple cider?”

“No, Spence, that’s it!” You said excitedly, pointing at one of the many orange gourds in the patch. “That’s the one!”

“Oh thank goodness,” Spencer huffed, adjusting the pumpkin already in his arms.

You beamed proudly at a rather large pumpkin. You might not be able to carry it, actually. You should have gotten a wheelbarrow, but you hadn’t exactly thought this through. It was incredibly round, but not too round, not quite preternaturally so. It’s vine was cut quite close, which you weren’t generally fond of, but you liked on this particular pumpkin. It looked a little dinged up, but you didn’t mind. It was the one.

“What are you going to name it?” Then, before you could answer. “Might I suggest Curbit?”

“Spence, my darling, I love you more than life itself, but that name sounds like Kermit the frog if he was a traffic cop.”

“It’s a shortening of Cucurbita Pepo, the technical name for pumpkin,” Spencer said, sounding slightly offended by your description of his name.

“Tell you what, next year I’ll name my pumpkin Curbit and you can name yours Pep, but this guy? This guy is a Gourdy.”

“Gourdy? You sure?”

“Yep. Positive.”

“Okay.” Spencer grinned at you over the top of his pumpkin.

“Now I just have to survive carrying him out of here.”

It wasn’t easy carrying Gourdy out of the pumpkin patch. It involved a lot of huffing and puffing from both of you since Spencer was still carrying his own pumpkin which he had named Peter. Eventually, though, you made it out and got yourself a wheelbarrow so that you could continue browsing your selection of gourds.

You and Spencer bought several different various other gourds, less picky in your pursuit of these. They would probably just end up eaten at the end of the day, so looks mattered less than potential taste. When you were finished though, you were more than satisfied with your selection.

“So, did you have fun today?” Spencer asked, wheeling your purchases back to the car.

“Um, heck yeah!”

“Good. I was hoping that would be a good surprise.” He smiled at you.

“It definitely was.” You picked up your pumpkin, setting it securely in the back of Spencer’s car before sticking your hand securely in Spencer’s back pocket. You absolutely adored the surprised look that crossed his face before fading into a very smug smirk. He leaned forward to kiss you, pulling you closer with one hand while the other tangled into your hair.

“Hey,” he said. “You know what I think we should do when we get home?”

You grinned, pulling your lower lip between your teeth. “Pumpkin carving?”

Spencer shook his head, laughing at you before detaching himself and putting his own pumpkin in the back of the car. “Yeah, pumpkin. That’s exactly what I think we should do.”

[hecohansen31]

Angel:

Hawthorne! Michael Langdon+Apparently Innocent! Reader.

(A/N): Hello there, lovelies!

I am finally back with this series, with a chapter that I personally love and appreciate, mostly because it is about something I have personally experienced (the discriminaion for being considered innocent, not getting rawed by Michael Langdon... if I had experienced that, we all know well that my smut would be much better).

I honestly hate when people link the concept of being innocent and inexperienced to being either “too little for certain things” or they fetishize it annoyingly, because I mean everybody does things at its own space and movement and you shouldn’t be sticking your pervert nose into it.

(Unless you are Michael Langdon, obviously).

Also two special mention: @avesatanormalpeoplescareme and @langdvnshepherd who inspired a bit the little Michael you see here, I honestly love their interpretation of fuckboy! Michael Langdon, it gives me life and excitment so please check out both the “FuckBoy Saga” and “A Change Of Heart”)

After this being said, if you want to leave a comment, reblog this fic or just like it, know that my heart will luterally birst with happiness because I am always curious to know what others think of what I write!

If you want to read the previous chapter, you find it here!

SUMMARY: Being an “angel” isn’t easy, but hey... when Michael Langdon is around you might enjoy it more than you thought...

WORDS: 1,1 K.

WARNINGS; Rough Unprotected Sex (please guys, it takes you luterally a millisecond to wrap it, and avoid unwanted pregnancies and STDs, so DO IT!) Oral Sex (Male Reeceiving), Dirty Talk, Mention of Nudity, A Bit of Blasphemy.

She had always been dubbed “angel”.

A way to keep her tamed and shy.

A child who could be taken easily advantage of.

Smiles over venomous words, shiny naïve eyes over sultry looks and covering dress instead of see-through tops and short skirts.

That was her life, laid down before her since that freaking nickname had been firstly used for her.

It had its ups: nobody would mess with her, taken aback by her virtue, exposed through arts of gentleness and kindness, as a true martyr, happy of her tragic destiny and she would always hide under the premise of a true angel with a golden halo.

But it had more downs than anything: people thought she was naïve, hence stupid, taking advantage of her and when she spoke back, they either laughed it off, ripping what they needed from her hands or they just replied with anger at her, playing it all on her role as if she somehow had left them unsatisfied just because she didn’t follow her role.

People also had this kind of feeling of taboo whenever “spicy” arguments were discussed within her earing range, as if she was some kind of grown-up child which should be protected and shielded from anything horrible.

It had actually proved ineffective, because this shielding had just caused her to feel double the pain, whenever something truly horrific happened to her: her first break-up, the first drop of blood she saw from her body during the first cycle, the harassment she had first experienced from a drunken man…

And finally… sex…

Sex seemed something that was off the limits for her: men thought she was some kind of genderless creature, probably without any kind of genitalia under her or if she had… they were probably sealed like those of a  barbie, and this seemed a turn off for many guys, immediately scared by her premises, the gentleness in her eyes and the kindness in the curve of her mouth.

They put her on a pedestal and let her stay there, meanwhile they fucked their way to the bottom of the pit, as if she was some Saint worth of worshipping but nothing earthly or carnal should have met her skin, as if she risked to be tainted.

But there were other people who found it exciting.

They linked the fact that she was innocent, at least in her appearance, to her being demure and submissive, in other words: they were perverts who liked the thought of a young and sweet thing obeying every order, they gave her.

It was almost as if they thought that she hid something under her pleated skirts, alongside fetishizing her innocence, as if it was a prize they wanted to win, at all costs.

And she wasn’t that.

She had desires of her own, desires she had found out on her own, satisfying them barely with her fingers, fiction and porn (because she did watch porn, and owned a vibrator).

(The only time somebody had stumbled onto her wand, they had immediately assumed it was Madison’s, her roommate).

But none of that mattered when people called her “angel”.

And when Michael Langdon, the Boy Wonder, Hawthorne perfect student, with an amazing pendant to get under each witch’s skin had taken up to use that nickname, she knew she was doomed.

Because, whereas others were saying it with admiration, he said with a smirk which said: “I know what it is under that innocent exterior”.

But he didn’t say it the way other perverts thought they could see what hid under her own eyes.

He knew what she hid.

As if he recognized in her some deep darkness, he himself shared, in the darkest part of his soul.

If he owned one.

Because of this, she had decided to confront him, tell him that he knew nothing about her and to stop giving her those dirty looks.

She had entered his room to say this, not to be laid over his lap, her back against his front, his dick pushing in and out of her, meanwhile he kept her legs apart, spread enough for him to push himself in and out of her perfectly, meanwhile light kisses were peppered on her neck and dirty talk was whispered in her ear.

“I knew it from the moment I saw you… you wanted to get fucked hard” a particular hard thrust was delivered to her, hitting deep inside her cervix and a loud moan exited her mouth, meanwhile she pushed her nails into Michael’s hands, which she was gripping like her life depended on them.

Which kind of did, since he could give her salvation and damnation, with just a single shift of his hips and a smirk of his clever mouth.

“I saw you… I still remember you wore white when we first met… no panties, I could already sniff your arousal, and then… they called you angel…” he made her turn her face, puling on her hair, so he could look at her in her face, making her blush and divert her gaze from his own eyes, but he just slapper her, ordering her to look at him “… they don’t know you are nothing but a dirty whore, in need of a good fuck”.

He had been edging her for so long, and she just couldn’t help but nod.

She had dreamed of anything that Michael was giving her in that moment: the rough primal sex nobody thought she might dream with only her fingers between her legs.

Definitely not the type angels dreamed about…

And he was clearly demon to know the darkest of her interests.

“… or maybe you are just my twisted angel… the one who will go down on his knees just for a taste of my cock” and he pushed her down from his hips, his cock exiting her with a sudden squelching the sound so vulgar that she couldn’t help the throb between her legs.

He turned her around, manhandling her towards his dick, leading her by her hair to choke on it, immediately gags escaping her throat, roughly fucked by the thrust of Michael, although slowly they were becoming more and more sloppy… till he finished deep down in her throat, leaving her a mess of tangled limbs, sweaty and with his cum dripping down her mouth.

She was a total mess, an unsatisfied mess.

But he looked at her as if she as a vision, brushing (gently for the first time during that night) his seed away from her lips, meanwhile another hand sneaked between her legs caressing her ruined sacred place softly, a slow wave of pleasure brushing against it, with each ministration he graced her with.

Swiftly he gripped her head, the violence in his eyes coming back, but dulled, maybe because of the hazy doses of pleasure going through his body:

“We will keep this our dirty secret, angel”.

@so-langdon @1-800-bitchcraft @emmyrosee @blakewaterxx@rocketgirl2410 @ladynuwanda @w0nder-marie @bitchchatter@eternalnostalgia @chirpdesu @dreamxcollide @head-full-of-thougts @lonely-cloud @im-the-music-whore @orendamill @ayeayecaptaingally@loveofmonsters @kleineshaschen @dramapenguinthe3rd @drama-penguins@vampirefairyestelle @youshouldbescared @hplotrfan @a-exmrie@meandmystrangehabits @lovelylangdonx  @britishmoonchild @michael-langdon-appreciation (I keep tagging you and please let me know if it is fine, but I know that you liked the previous chapter!) @mega-combusken @frenchbread4ever @lovelylangdonx @confettucini @what-the-hecku @langdonsplaytoy @saviorinsilk @ terka250 @dandycandy75 @head-full-of-thougts @wayhaughtsearp @ freudian-bitch @cherrysoda-com @orendamill @loveableasshole @sona-blues  @xoxocrystal17 @bish-ima-clown @ anana166 @l luv2red247 @idespac @drama-penguins @annielovebug22 @literary-monster @g4ost @ sinistrasinistermacbeth @ psychowriter2702 @rubyeru @breakingsupernaturlbad101 @ bighairedshorty

[brittanafanfichelp]

Really interested in knowing what your top 10 brittana fics are!! Thank you for doing what you’re doing! :)

Turns out it’s pretty much impossible for me to decide on just 10 Brittana fics….but I did manage to narrow it down! So heres my top 20, I hope thats alright too

In no particular order though, I barely managed to narrow it down to 20, no way I can also rank them. I’m really bad at this, I’m sorry lol.

Set the World on Fire by Cora709For six months Santana has been living in New York City with Kurt and Rachel, but now Brittany has received her diploma and is finally coming to join them. Can new relationships accommodate old ones? And can the past ever really be recaptured?

Only Time Will Tell by sadieredNationally-ranked American figure skaters Brittany Pierce and Santana Lopez train as Olympic hopefuls. “It is fresh and it is fruitful if I win, but if I lose. Oh, I don’t know." 

Taking The Long Way by Lingering LiliesSantana’s journey toward self-acceptance through love, loss, friends, career and family. Contains Glee history through "Original Song.” Rated M for sex. 

Tattoo by littleoases“She soaks it in for a few seconds—this night, this place, these friends, this family room floor, this girl—before she says it back.” Post-3x11. Brittana.

Any Sort of Blue Sky by themostrandomfandomBrittany and Santana find ways to love each other, no matter what their situation. Five Mouseverse vignettes.

You Instead by your-street-serenadeBrittana AU. Two feuding rockstars handcuffed together for 24 hours. A rock and roll love story set against an unforgettable lost weekend at a music festival, filled with lust, mud, betrayal, porta potties and a hundred thousand people partying to the greatest music in the world.

We’re Just Getting Started by lizbeanBrittany and Santana are married with twins. Join Quinn’s journey as she learns about herself, relationships and parenting from Brittana. Unholy Trinity friendship.

They Bring Me Back by wherehopeliesSantana Lopez lives an average life in New York as a bartender. When gorgeous Brittany and Santana’s teenage niece fall into her lap, things get interesting.

Somewhere in Brooklyn by MartianThoughtsSantana and Brittany have been trying to get pregnant for a year without any luck. What happens when a teenage foster child and positive pregnancy test land in their laps on the same day? A unique journey of motherhood ensues.

Piece By Piece by LeighKellyWhen pediatric surgeon Santana Lopez meets Dr. Brittany Pierce, head of plastic surgery, in the elevator during a blackout at the hospital, she’s immediately hit with a sense of disdain. Little does she know that she’ll be the first person to show her what love looks like, and change her life for good.

My Girlfriend’s Sister’s Keeper by bodybrokeBrittany isn’t the only Pierce that has Santana wrapped around her finger. Santana’s life with her two favorite people.

In My Life I Love You More by superrocketableFuturefic! 10 years on running into old school friends throws up a few suprises :D rated M due to language

be my fire in the cold (and I’ll be waiting by the mistletoe) by Echoes-of-RealitiesWhen the production stage manager for George Balanchine’s The Nutcracker, starring one Brittany S. Pierce, is fired seven shows into its run, Santana is hired and thrown into the production with barely any preparation.

And I’m Calling You to Be My Lifeline by daysofinspirationTina isn’t sure how Santana manages to mix her number with the crisis helpline, but now that it’s happened she is determined to do everything she can to help. Santina friendship, Brittana

You Gave Me the Word, I Finally Heard by LeighKellyWhen Brittany Pierce was seven, a near drowning experience left her profoundly deaf. For twenty-two years, she’s lived in a quiet solitude, her mother’s response to her accident leaving her wary of building relationships. She’s content with her life, her career, her home with her service dog Otis, until she quite literally runs into Santana Lopez…and then everything changes.

Rent My Pussy by soulpicnicLonely? Call 1-800-BSPUSSY.

Reasons that I Laugh and Breathe by klikeszombiesAU. Brittany goes to college and meets Santana and the rest of New Directions. Even though life has been hard so far, and even though bad things still happen, she regrets nothing that has brought her here.

I Know You Wanna Touch by bugstoriesBrittana AU - Brittany and Santana are both in their mid-twenties, meeting in a fancy bar in New York City. The chemistry is there, but how will Santana react when she finds out that the mysterious blonde is in fact an escort? Will she give her a chance?

Burn The Whore House (To The Ground) by IceRose92In a world where sex slavery is the norm, Santana is sold to a wealthy man who hopes that her company can help mend his daughter’s broken spirit. Can a master who doesn’t believe in the slave trade and a slave who only wants to be loved let go of their troubled pasts? AU Brittana (very small mentions of Faberry, Puckurt, Tike, and Samcedes)

To Wish Possible Things by bodybrokeAfter the events at Mr. Schue’s wedding, Brittany and Santana have a long overdue conversation about what exactly went wrong in their relationship, and start trying to fix it, with a little help from their friends.

[apologieslogan]

Overwhelming- Chapter 1

Hey, guys! Here’s the first chapter to a new fic I've been working on. To sum it up, its insecure and anxious!logan and protective!patton. I do have more of it done, so if you guys like it, please let me know!! 

Words: 800

Pairing: Romantic Logicality, Romantic Prinxiety (on the side)

Warnings: nothing for this chapter!

The early morning sun shone through the slits between the blinds, gently pulling Patton from his sleep. He lifted himself up to his elbow to look at the man, his boyfriend, in his arms. He loved the way Logan looked when he slept. None of his walls are up while he’s asleep, and for a few minutes after he wakes up while he builds those walls again. When Logan was asleep like this, Patton was free to count the faint freckles spattered across Logan’s nose and cheeks without his glasses covering the majority of them. Patton brings a hand up to caress Logan’s face, slowly waking him.

“Good morning, sweetheart.” Patton sing-songs as Logan begins to shift awake.

“Good morning, Pat.” Logan grumbles, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes as he blinks up at Patton, giving him a small smile.

The two looked into each other’s eyes for way longer than necessary, slowly leaning in for a good morning kiss.

“I love you.” Logan blushes.

“I love you more.” Replies Patton, kissing Logan again on the nose.

The two go down to the kitchen for breakfast, taking their time. They have the place to themselves today since Roman managed to convince Virgil to accompany him on one of his outings, and they wouldn’t be back until late the next day.

“What plans do you have for today?” Patton asked, taking a sip of coffee.

“I’ve decided to take advantage of this day and try to get some work done.” Logan replied, scanning Patton’s face for any disappointment. Upon finding discontent on his lover’s face he continued.

“However, since we have no true obligations today, I have decided that you are my top priority, and I wish to spend the majority of the day with you, though I would appreciate at least a few hours to get some work completed, if that is fine with you.” He finished, a small smile on his face as he saw Patton’s face light up upon Logan’s words.

“Aww Logy, that sounds wonderful!” Patton gushed, a light blush spreading across his cheeks. “And don’t worry, I won’t keep you away from your work for too long. I was just thinking maybe we could watch a couple movies and cuddle for a few hours.” Patton suggested, his eyebrows furrowing as he activated his puppy eyes.

Logan stared into those eyes and felt his willpower diminish until it was nonexistent.

“That sounds more than satisfactory, dear.” Logan said, fighting back a full-on smile at his adorable boyfriend’s face.

--

Patton strolled up the stairs, on his way to check on Logan. After their movie marathon, Patton finally let Logan get some work done, albeit reluctantly. He just loved holding Logan in his arms so much. He knew Logan would never admit it, but he was actually a big softie and loved the feeling of being tucked inside of Patton’s arms. As Patton neared Logan’s room, he heard something that made him stop in his tracks.

--

Logan tore another page out of his notebook, crumbling it up and tossing it over his shoulder. He was way past being frustrated, and he was on the verge of having his emotions get the better of him. He had been working on various activities for quite some time now, and he was beginning to feel frantic. Although he did love his day spent with Patton, he had lost copious amounts of time that he could have been using to tend to his responsibilities. Logan groaned and pulled his hair, trying to force himself out of his mind and back to the matter at hand.

As the time passed Logan began to feel more and more helpless, his thought process slowing as he got more and more frustrated at himself. On what felt like his hundredth attempt, put his head in his hands, his breathing loud and uneven; he was trying to back himself off the edge of the cliff, for fear that he would fall off and descend into full meltdown. Logan had only hit that type of emotional one other time before, and nobody had seen it. Just thinking about it causes his heartrate to quicken. As he sits there, breathing heavily, he hears footsteps.

Logan tries desperately to regulate his breathing, but the prospect of being caught like this, by Patton of all people does the opposite effect. Tears spring to his eyes, and he wills them not to fall, trying his best not to blink and looking upwards.

Patton bursts through the door, never really getting the whole knocking thing down.

“Hey, Logy, what are you up… to…” Patton drifts off, looking at his boyfriend, hair mussed, cheeks flushed red, and eyes watery.

“Logan?” Patton says gently, trying not to startle him, “are you okay?”

Thats the first chapter! I know not much happens in it, and its short as heck, so let me know if you want more! 

Tag List:

@galaxy-warped 

@katatles-the-fish

[thewhiterabbit42]

Full Circle: Part 7

Full Circle Masterlist

Pairing: Gabriel x Reader

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings/Tags: Winchester sister!reader, angst, revelations, more swears

Author’s Note: This was supposed to be the final chapter, but there was a natural break in the flow of things so there will be one more after this one.  Also, the second GMC prompt was designed to fit into this chapter:  Sometimes when you least expect it, you get saved.

Special thanks to @nobodys-baby-now for keeping me excited about my writing and all her awesome love today around this fic.  BB I love you <3

***Please do not repost or copy my work to any other site without my written permission.  Giving credit does NOT count.  Reblogging is ok.***

<<Prev Chapter       Part 7

Sometimes when you least expect it, you get saved, but it wasn’t always by the ones who should have been helping you.  

“Where the hell were you?” You demanded as Cas and Gabriel appeared back in sight, your eyes blazing as you pinned the former with a dangerous look.  

You had no idea where Cas’ ass had been that entire time.  The moment Raphael had returned you had prayed for help, knowing the look on Gabriel’s face had not been a sign this was a happy family reunion.  

Yet, your friend never came.  

He never came when you told him you were face to face (or more accurately, neck to hand) with an archangel who looked seriously intent on taking a chunk out of you.  

He never came when you felt a part of you being carved out as Raphael forced his grace inside you, the electrifying, detached energy tearing through your very being and making you feel as if you were being split into a million pieces.  

He never came when desperation choked the words in your throat as Gabriel was pummeled with the holy light of heaven’s purest bedtime prayers, or whatever the shit smites were made out of.  

And he certainly never came when you had a goddamn gun pressed against your head.  Though you might have been beyond coherent thought at that point.  Still, your connection to 1-800-dial-an-angel should have kept your so-called friend informed of your ongoing situation, which involved the most elevated level of fear you’d felt since you’d all gone toe-to-toe with the devil.  

So when things escalated once again, and you found yourself hip deep in winged dicks with awful odds, you sent up the prayer of all prayers.  So help me, Cas, if Gabriel dies because you bailed on me, I have at least a dozen ideas on how to deal with you, all of which involve the business end of an angel blade.    

It was a little dramatic, sure, but Gabriel was not dying.  Not here.  Not again, and especially not because of you.  Cas was lucky you didn’t stab him on sight after the smite-fest Gabriel endured.  The only reason you weren’t roasting some feathers and letting the archangel bring the marshmallows was because the seraphim had pulled through for you at the last moment.  

It didn’t make you any less angry at him, however.

“I came as soon as I could,” Cas informed you, a little testier than usual.  A red flag popped up in the back of your mind, waving casually back and forth.  Why he, of all things this evening, would be the one to trigger it was beyond you.

Unfortunately it was like waving red at an already raging bull.

“Well it wasn’t soon enough,” you hissed as you jabbed him hard in the chest.  How dare he sound put out after what you and Gabriel had gone through.

He brought his hand up, fingertips brushing gently against your side.  Coldness washed outward from his touch, and you shuddered as his grace pushed through your skin.  It wasn’t an inherently unpleasant sensation, but after Raphael’s invasion, feeling any of them beneath your skin was disconcerting.  

He must have been searching for wounds, and his eyes narrowed intently when he didn’t find any.  He must have taken a moment to slip in a little mojo sedative, however.  At least you assumed he did, by the way you were no longer considering the best place to stab him that wasn’t guaranteed to kill him, but still might.  

“And you,” you said, rounding on the archangel and giving him a poke of his own.  “You need to look up the definition of stupid.”

“Glad to see you too, babycakes,” he said, sarcasm splashing through words, though the smile he gave appeared to be genuine.  You could tell by the way his dimples appeared.  Usually those made whatever he was trying to achieve that much more successful, but you were having none of that right now, no matter how endearing he looked.

“We should leave this place,” Cas interjected eyes glancing around warily.  

That was the best plan you’d heard all night.  

The angel didn’t even wait for you to agree.  He grabbed you both by the shoulders, and your stomach lurched as a familiar rush whooshed through you.  You weren't sure you’d ever get used to that feeling.  It was like riding the world’s longest roller coaster in the span of a second.  

It took a moment for your head to catch up, but once it did, you found yourself back in your hotel room.  Everything from the candles to the balloons had disappeared, leaving no evidence of the evening’s previous events.  Gabriel eyed the room warily, no doubt sweeping it for signs of danger.  Cas, on the other hand, just eyed him.

“Our father could not have brought you back at a better time,” the dark-haired angel said.

Then there was that little matter.  Raphael had prattled on and on about the heaven’s burning, about war, taking sides, paradise.  For a little while you had forgotten what year you were in, because it sounded awfully like the apocalypse was still on the agenda despite your family having put the kibosh on it.  

“Would someone like to tell me what the hell is going on upstairs?” You demanded, arms folding over your chest.  

“We are at war,” Cas began.  “When Sam took Michael to the cage with him, Raphael stepped in to take his place as Heaven’s leader.  He, like his brother, is a traditionalist and believes that the story must end the way that it was written.”

You swallowed.  Your cup was feeling awfully full at the moment.  You weren’t sure you could handle being told all those sacrifices had been for nothing, in addition to dealing with the rest of the crazy that was flying around.

“Are you saying… it isn’t over?” Your voice had gotten quiet, nervousness edging into your words.    

“If I have any say in it, it is,” he promised.  “There are others like me who believe we have the right to choose our own ending and that is why we’re fighting.  For your freedom and ours.”

Not just a war.  Cas’ war.  

No wonder he’d vanished.  The man was carrying the fate of Heaven and Earth on his shoulders.  

“You’re the one leading the resistance?” Gabriel demanded, and you weren’t sure what was more surprised, the angel or his eyebrows with how they nearly shot clear off his browline.  “Way to go, little bro.”  

You slowly lowered yourself onto the dresser, giving your mind a moment to catch up.  Your brain took in the new information, kicking it around for a few moments, before throwing up its hands and reminding you this was all way above your pay grade.  

Your hand slipped into your coat pocket, fingers tracing over the contour of your cell before you realized you only had one person left that you could call.  Bobby was as much your family as your brothers, but it wasn’t his voice that was going to keep you from getting caught in the ever increasing riptide.  Dean was the only one left who knew how to bring you back from the brink, and he was no longer an option.  

“You alright, cupcake?” Gabriel asked, sitting down next to you.  The subtle brush of fingers across your back brought more comfort than you wanted to admit.  You looked over, surprised to find his features heavily shuttered.  

A guarded archangel was never a good sign.  

“Yeah, just…” You paused, hair on the back of your arms rising.  Unconsciously you reached up to your neckline, tugging on your sweater.  Was the room getting smaller?  Because it felt like everything around you was suddenly shrinking.  You forced yourself to take a breath, focusing on the way your heart responded to the slow inhalation before you released it normally.

“It’s a lot to take in,” you finished, your chest feeling heavy, as if there wasn’t much air to take in at all.  Your phone became forgotten as a dissonance danced along your spine, sending signals to your muscles to stiffen.  Your nerves tingled as if you were back in that tiny interrogation room, your mind trying to rectify the difference between what you felt and the spacious accommodations you saw.

“Understandably so,” Cas said sympathetically, though his compassion fell short, overlooking the tension tightening your frame as he continued to vomit Heaven’s issues all over you.   “You should know, however, that things are not going well.  Strategically we have the advantage, but we are outnumbered.  All Raphael has to do is outlast us.  We need something to give us an edge, something to turn the tide enough to break his ranks or take him out of play.”

“Like another archangel.”  Gabriel said flatly.

“An archangel would be helpful,” Cas admitted, “But that is your decision to make, brother.”

While it didn’t surprise you that the the third member of Team Free Will would advocate for just that, Gabriel seemed suspicious.  Considering the last few encounters he’d had with his family, you couldn’t blame him.  

By the way Cas turned to you and said, “It is your help I really need,”  you would have thought he’d had the sense smited out of him earlier, because what in the Virgin Mary’s pure and pious pants were you supposed to do about anything?

“And in turn,” the seraphim went on, as if making complete sense, “I would be able to help you.”

Hope sparked fierce in your chest, burning through the oxygen in your lungs, and for a moment you couldn’t breath.  It no longer mattered what it was he thought you could offer or that you knew better than to make deals with otherworldly beings.  This was the break you were waiting for.  

“You found a way to get Sam out?”  You almost hadn't dared to ask.  A let down of that magnitude after everything else would be crushing, and you weren’t certain you had enough left in you to survive that.

Your friend paused a moment, his eyes narrowing on you.  

“Sam has been free for months now,” he told you, features becoming a contrast of hard edges and sympathetic blue orbs.  “I thought you knew.”

Free?  Sam was free?  How the shit could that be possible?

“That - that can’t be right.”  You almost laughed at the absurdity of it.  Sam couldn’t be out.  If there was anyone he would have called, it would have been you.  He would have called somebody.    

Unless... it wasn’t Sam that crawled out of there.  

“I’m sorry.  I don’t know what to say except that he is, and it is him,” he continued as if reading your thoughts.  Any other angel you would have suspected, but it was Cas.  He must have known that’s where your mind would go.  Besides, he knew better.

But if you could trust him, then that meant…

“Oh my god,” you breathed.

Somebody was in for a royal ass kicking as soon as you found him.

Your shoulders hunched, your body giving beneath the weight of all the knowledge suddenly spinning around in your head.  You were thankful to be already sitting as you felt the strength leave your system.  The blows just kept coming, and at this rate it wouldn’t be long before your brain was completely beaten to a stump.

Your pocket began to buzz, the furious movement causing you to jump as the vibrations danced across your leg.  You pulled it out to find Bobby’s name flashing across the front of the screen.  

A thought, unbidden, skittered across your consciousness: what if Cas wasn’t the only one who knew?

You immediately dismissed the notion as crazy.This was Bobby.  He wouldn’t keep something like this from you.  Yet, you couldn’t help but answer the call, vaguely aware of something shifting in the angel’s stare.

“Christ on a cracker,” Bobby grumbled, exasperation adding an extra bite to his words, “What the hell is your --”

“Is Sam out?” You cut him off, desperation infringing on the even tone you tried to keep.  You weren’t sure what answer you needed to hear more at the moment: your brother was alive or your personal circle of trust was still in tact.

The silence that followed told you all you needed to know.   

“You mean he still hasn’t told you?” Bobby asked, just as taken aback as you were.  Your heart dropped deep within your stomach.  You suddenly felt sick, disbelief preventing you from reacting right away and a pregnant, laden silence fell between you.   

“Fuck, Bobby!”  You finally found your voice, though it grew thick as the floodgates reopened.  You wanted to cry.  You wanted to celebrate.  You wanted to scream at Bobby and your brother for joining the running for douche of the year because what the actual shit?

“Why do you think I’ve been calling so much?  To schedule tea?” He retorted.  

“How long?” You demanded, proud of how you managed to keep your voice from wavering despite the stinging sentiments gathering along your lashline.  

“I dunno… five months?”  He had the decency to sound chagrined, but it was lost within the rising tide of your anger.

Five months.  

Five fucking months without a word from either of them.  

“Listen, kid, this isn’t the type of thing you just drop in a voicemail…”

Oh yes it fucking was.  That was exactly what you did after the first few days. That or you GPSd their ass and showed up on their doorstep, which was exactly what Dean would’ve done in this situation.  

Oh God, Dean.  Did he know?  

No.  There was no way.  He would never have kept that information from you.  

Then again, five minutes ago you would have said the said the same thing about Sam and Bobby.  

“Dean?” You couldn’t fully say it, as if somehow not breathing life into the fear would somehow prevent it from ever being true.  

“I may be an idjit, but I’m not an ass,” he grumbled.  

Well that was certainly debatable.

Relief swept in, brushing aside the dread that had overtaken everything.  

“He deserves to know,” you insisted, fingers digging into your eyes as you realized you would  have to be the one to tell him.  More than just the news was going to get broken if Bobby was the one delivering the message.  

“What that kid deserves is a chance to be normal.  Happy.  Not to die bloody and alone, like the rest of us will.”  You were taken back by the vehemence in his tone and you couldn’t remember the last time he sounded so fired up about anything.  “And if it were up to me, your life wouldn’t be any different.”

Was he asking you to do what you thought he was?

“But I know you,” he continued, a deep-seated weariness entering his voice.  “I know what runs in your blood won’t ever settle for normal.  But you of all people know, choosing this life means sacrificing to protect the ones who are normal, and as far as I’m concerned, Dean’s one of those people now.”  

Christ, you couldn’t touch this right now.  You couldn’t even begin to know what you were going to do with the knowledge that Sam was alive and Dean didn’t know.  Your cup was no longer overflowing, it had overflowed, tipped over, and you were all but drowning in the liquid that continued to spill out from it.

“I’ll call you back,” you managed, your inner reserves flagging.  You didn’t give him the chance to say anything else before you disconnected the call.  Your finger dug into the power button, pressing against it insistently, and you resisted the urge to throw the damn thing across the room.

If only you could make the rest of your problems disappear that easily.

Your head dropped forward, fingers gripping the edge of the dresser, and you did your best to contain your emotions.  As it was, the only thing you seemed able to hold in at the moment was the air in your lungs.

“Breathe,” Gabriel reminded after a few moments, gently squeezing your shoulder.  You brought your hands up, palming at your eyes as you felt a few tears squeeze their way loose.

“You’re upset,” Cas’ gruff voice moved closer to you.  

“I’m exhausted,” you told him, weariness weighing down your words.  “I had the worst sleep of my life this morning, I woke up feeling like I’d been on the receiving end of a good smite, and returned to a place I never wanted to set foot in again, twice, because someone decided to drop a crumb for me to follow without telling me it led to the middle of a fucking angel war and that my brother has been out of the cage for months now.”  

“I don’t understand.  How does a fragment of food lead to anything other than bugs?” Cas asked, perplexed.  

You looked up, glaring at him through a thin curtain of hair.  You might have laughed if you weren’t so done with everything.

“The news story story, Cas,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.  Hard. 

“What story?” He asked, confused.  

“What do you mean what story?” The sound of your patience finally snapping came out as a snarl in your throat.  “I prayed to you in Massachusetts and you put on the local news for Indiana in my hotel room so I would know there was a powersurge and check it out.”

“I was never in your hotel room,” he told you.  “I heard your prayer, but I was in the middle of battle and couldn’t respond.”  

You swallowed, both you and Cas’ shifting your gazes to Gabriel.

“Don’t look at me,” the archangel said, putting his hands up in front of him.  “If I’d have been there, I’d have sent you in the opposite direction.”

Said the man who had been horribly desperate to get into your pants not even an hour ago.  

There were shit ways to be told you were just a mistake and then, apparently, there was Gabriel’s way.  

“Your inner archangel is showing,” you told him, anger varnishing your sarcasm as your stare began to burn.  “You may want to look into that.”

He stiffened at the remark, eyes darting briefly to the other angel then back to you.  You expected some flippant comment, maybe a smart ass retort that was also somehow endearing.  His silence, however, spoke volumes.

“It must have been Raphael.  He must have followed you here,” Cas interrupted, concern spilling over into his voice.  

“Why the hell would Raphael be following me?” You rounded on him.  You were sick of being left in the dark about things, and you had a distinct feeling there was far more of Heaven’s problems spilling onto you than anyone had let on.

Then again, you were also sick of this night and wanted nothing more than for it to just be over.  

“Because, like your brothers, you were meant to fulfill a greater purpose.  While they were meant to bring about war, you, I believe, are a catalyst to do the opposite,” your friend explained.  By the look on his face, he was gearing up for something.  Something that was likely to make your brain fall in on itself.  Something you guaranteed you neither had the time nor patience for.  

“Wait, what?” Gabriel broke in, as if that was the last piece of insanity he could handle.

“Cas, I - I can’t even right now,” you warned, putting up a hand for him to stop.  

“What I’m about to tell you is important —”

“I mean it,” you continued, ignoring the manic light blazing within blue.  Not now. 

Either your friend was especially oblivious to the level of your distress, or he simply didn’t care.  He grabbed you by the shoulders, forcing you to hear out this final piece of information.

“Y/n… you’re a shepherd.”  

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[fuckcyberlife]

DBH Fic Recs

Some faves below the cut.

The Artist by KyDesert

"Sometimes, you’ve gotta fight your own battles, kid.”

And fight he did while he lay on Hank’s sofa, swaddled in blankets and unable to move. Too hot, but much, much too cold. Motionless while the last of CyberLife’s programming tore through his systems and made his hands ache to complete one final mission.

Damn did Hank wish he could be there to help the kid fight this one.

Lidocaine by SgtSalt

Markus is a caretaker. Markus is a nurse.

Markus is an android, and androids don't need either of the jobs he was created to do, because they can't feel pain.

A character exploration from Markus' POV, as he figures out what makes him - and other androids - uniquely alive. Features reflections about Carl and developing a rapport with Connor, who has a confession to make. Starts pre-canon and ends slightly post-canon.

seven, five, three, five, seven by WonderAss

Being alive is a messy process. Connor is confronted again with the double-edged sword of higher thinking when he starts displaying the first signs of a disorder.

empty-handed by silverhedges

Connor hunting Markus, successfully.

“The first time Markus hears of the android detective is from the TV they stole and managed to illegally rig up in the main living room.”

Getting Ahead of Deviancy by lapsi

The FBI begins to infringe on Lieutenant Hank Anderson's investigation of the TV station hijacking, in the form of the newly established Deviant Science Unit. The Bureau's answer to outbreaks of deviant behaviour, this unit collects data on deviant androids in order to understand and preempt criminal behaviour. So, Hank has no fucking idea why they've zeroed in on a non-deviant android, his partner Connor.

(The Mindhunter x Detroit: Become Human crossover that nobody asked for)

Empathy (and other dead weight) by CynKLBouns

Sure, now everyone wanted to hold hands, give out flowers, and pretend machines were real boys and girls or some shit. As if they weren’t hunting them through every city like rats just a month ago. People going nuts over their crusade one moment, stinking up the streets with the fires, and all of a sudden everything just fucking stops as though anything changed.

Nothing fucking changed.

A machine was still a machine, no matter how fancy its program.

How to be Authentic by StoriesFromDust

Hank was at work. Connor should be at work. He frowned from the sofa, staring at his jacket across the room. He liked that jacket. His favorite part of being woken up after uploading to a new build was when he put the jacket on and fixed his tie. He was mad that it had betrayed him, become something that marked him as less-than-a-person.

Changed the name from 'A Loan I Can't Repay' as I got farther in the story and figured out the ending. Sorry if it confused anyone!

Fear Response by joudama

Gavin Reed’s eyes narrowed, and the man was almost vibrating with a barely-contained rage. But there was also something else in his eyes, a “blink-and-you-would-miss it” tremor of something else, enough to make Connor pause and analyze the other man.

Clue: Slight widening of the eyes, with the whites showing around the irises.

Clue: Increased breathing, but shallow breaths; not the faster, heavier breaths associated with anger and rage.

Clue: Increased heart rate.

Clue: Loss of facial color due to constriction of capillaries, and a resulting vasodilation of central blood vessels to muscles.

Analysis: Gavin Reed was afraid.

Further Analysis: Gavin Reed was afraid of him.

of all ghosts by BeepGrandCherokeeper

In the moment, he’d defined the statue as religious – but androids have no distant gods who require worship, only their human creators. Reverence is as far outside their limited scope as any other emotion, and yet…

“In the bathroom,” Connor says, testing the waters. The deviant looks up at him abruptly, moving with a speed that blatantly indicates interest. “You left something behind. An offering. Why? What purpose does it serve?”

“So I’ll be saved,” it replies. “rA9. The first. The only one who can save us.”

Mind-Blowing by Reddooo

“I mean it, Gavin,” Hank said. “If Price even looks at you funny, if he gives you any shit—” He took a step closer to Gavin to make sure that the younger man was listening. Reed began to fidget considerably by the proximity, but it didn’t seem to be from anger. It was almost as if he was getting upset, “—you come to me immediately. Do you understand?”

Gavin didn’t answer. He hadn’t looked over at Hank since he started talking to him directly. Chris and Connor exchanged glances. Connor’s interest was more than piqued. Hank was acting almost… protective? Was that the word? Protective over Gavin?

“Gavin?” Hank called again and Gavin’s attention finally snapped to the acting captain.

“Yes. Hank. I understand.”

---

An accident at a neighboring precinct has two departments sharing office space, but Gavin and Hank have murderous beef with the guest lieutenant and Connor is determined to find out why.

stay out of trouble by yellow_caballero

Unemployment was not the best thing to ever happen to Connor, but it was high on the list. The best thing to ever happen to Connor was the sight of a Corgi wearing a small cowboy hat leashed to a post in front of the liquor shop. The second best thing to ever happen to him was the emancipation of his people from slavery and the opening of negotiations for equal rights. But unemployment may come in at a solid third.

march of progress by Calamitatum

Connor could fill a book with the things he doesn't know. One of Hank’s big, thick paperbacks, pages worn with age, covers creased and coffee-stained.

"What?" Hank grouses once, when he catches him looking. "They’re well-loved, at least."

Connor looks at himself, smooth plastic and pressed clothes. No creases, no stains.

Tonic by psymyn

The reclining chair had been a gift from Hank—something about housewarming—and Connor has never felt the need to get anything else.

All of Detroit is Lonely by steadycoffeeslow (Salimity)

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Hank’s non-alcohol addled brain was reminding him he hadn’t told Connor anything in particular at Stratford Tower. Last he could rightly remember, they were both watching that deviant’s speech and Connor hadn’t shared his thoughts with the detective. Connor had clearly been thinking of something, but of what, Hank couldn’t decipher. A part of him, at the time, had hoped that the deviant’s message had swayed something in Connor. Hank sure felt that it had swayed something in him.

Can androids and humans coexist? As Connor and Hank cope with the rapidly changing political climate of Detroit, their choices threaten what peace the partners have forged. Updates Friday-Saturday-Sunday

The Novelist by Satirrian

Androids did not feel. His mind was cold metal and white plastic. He was nothing more than a mission. The time was 1207 and Lieutenant Anderson was due to arrive at the station. Connor predicted that there was a 67% chance that Lt. Anderson had not arrived at the station.

Some new cases come in that make Connor wonder what deviants really are.

passing time. by shorelines

Androids don't sleep. They don't eat. Sometimes, they don't even die. So what do they do, with all that time?

The hobbies and histories of three androids, now and into the future.

Uncanny by MercuryPilgrim

It’s strange, how RK-800 is more unnerving as a Deviant than he ever was as a machine.

Meanwhile... by wintercoat

Connor is loitering in his peripheral vision, his officious shoulder angel. “What are you doing, Lieutenant?”

“Questioning my life choices.”

Christmas, 2038 by phocion

The mostly peaceful Android Rebellion of 2038 ended with tentative success, but now the androids must carve out a permanent place in a wary society. Markus, trying to hold on to that hard-won freedom, gets drawn into Hank and newly deviant Connor’s investigation into a string of complex thefts and murders. With far too many coincidences for comfort and old enemies resurfacing in the shadows, Markus has to figure out fast who he can trust. Letting North blow everyone up is starting to sound like a better idea every day…

--

Mostly an excuse to write more Markus and Connor interactions, now featuring triple the angst, double the Tracis, allegedly naked confessions in a public restroom, and a furby.

error by ZombieBabs

An error message, angry red and insistent, fills Connor’s field of vision.

He blinks, but diagnostics reveal no malfunction. And yet, the error message persists.

It buzzes like an old neon sign, refusing to be ignored.

warm and waking by puppyblue

Connor is not a deviant. He has also been programmed with the ability to lie.

November Cold by floweryhanzo

He's not answering the messages, but by now, Connor knows where to find him.

Fish in a Bowl by ConnorRK

“So as long as it’s not the face, it’s fine, huh?” Reed says. His free hand is suddenly on Connor’s neck, fingers soft against the line of his jaw, and the press of skin is hot. He lets it trail down the front of the CyberLife coat, and Connor can’t stop the shiver of his plates as they respond to the light pressure. “I’ve heard that before.”

(Connor is forced to work with Gavin on the deviancy case when Hank is injured and relegated to two weeks of desk duty.)

Faulty Buzzer by spitfireoo

Connor glitches out and can’t wake up. Hank finds him unresponsive on the couch and remembers the last time he had to carry a son.

Five Times Gavin Receives Kindness and +1 Times He Tries To Give It Back by Lady_Origami

It's hard to continue hating a person when said person is apparently a rather kind soul. Even if that person isn't a person at all, but an android with the same job as him.

101 Things (about Lieutenant Hank Anderson) by MoonlightPastime

“Good morning, Hank.” The Lieutenant grunted, mouth buried in the mug already. Connor glanced towards the tv, led flickering for half a second it took to turn in on. This was also ‘routine’ now. Another thing Connor now knew.

Non-verbal before consuming at least 2.76 fluid oz of coffee.

In which Connor does even more 'homework' on Hank.

Castaways by SilverKnight16

Connor grit his teeth. Why was he making this difficult? “If CyberLife knew that deviancy had the potential to end human lives, they had an obligation to their consumers to protect them from the danger as soon as they were made aware. And if CyberLife knew that deviancy was the formation of self-awareness, then their attempts to stop it are tantamount to genocide.”

“And if you were programmed to hunt them down, that makes you an accessory to murder.” Hank swigged again.

Connor stiffened, Thirium 310 churning loudly in his audio receptors.

--

Like a piece of driftwood in a hurricane, Connor, Hank, and everyone else stranded in the eye of the storm have to navigate something much bigger than themselves--or die.

Validation by spiderstanspiderstan

Post-revolution, androids in the workforce require bi-annual validation. Connor has just turned six months old, and is going for his first.

He does not like it.

Hands Stained Blue by PorcelainPlayground

After the car crash that changed their lives forever, Hank Anderson ends up buying an android to help care for his son, Cole. Being short on money, Hank turns to a collection of second-hand androids and stumbles across Connor, who quickly becomes the second son Hank never knew he wanted.

Too Long, Lost Cause by staringatstars

Fowler knows he didn't stop being Hank's friend when he became his captain. He's been trying to help him for years, but it's starting to seem like the old Anderson isn't coming back. If anything, he's only getting worse.

And he'd hoped giving him a partner, even an android partner, would help get him out of the rut he'd fallen into, but now he can't help but wonder if his latest plan to reignite the fire in him hasn't worked a little too well.

The 5 Times Gavin Was An Ass and the 1 Time He Wasn’t by HelsSoBlue

5 times Gavin was an ass and elicited a response from Connor. And the one time he wasn't an ass.

or

Connor has had enough of Gavin's shit, and Hank is loving every moment of it.

A Strange Comet by windyfiend

Connor's dedication to Jericho's mission -- and his guilt over having hunted his own people -- has him working tirelessly every moment of every day and night. He's given himself no time to breathe, let alone live his new life.

Hank's got something to say about that.

Man’s Best Friend by ryouseiteki

Can one small change affect the course of a Revolution? Connor takes a left instead of a right at the Detroit Police Department reception the morning of his first meeting with Hank.

Connor's brow furrows as he accesses the new ID and doesn't see Lieutenant Anderson listed under Handler. In fact... he is listed under Handler and instead of being under partner or associate, he's been placed above a Trainee named-

"FuzzButtIncoming, come." The android calls out, and through a slot in the door on the other side of the room, a tiny bundle of fur almost buried under a DPD K-9 Unit vest comes gamboling up to stand beside it.

Someone had desperately wanted its initials to spell FBI.

Guillotine by assistmediagnostics

"Then I'll crawl back to Jericho," and as if to exemplify this fact, Simon puts one hand on the graffitied wall, puts his right foot forward, drags his left foot behind it. Rinse. Repeat. It takes him an inordinately long amount of time to walk five feet and by two feet and six and a half inches, Markus is already shaking his head.

"I'm not leaving you behind, Simon."

it's anchored to my racing mind (maybe you can slow its stride) by bibliomatic

Connor's programming tells him he's wrong for being deviant. The new world tells him he's wrong for thinking he's wrong for being a deviant. The result: he feels bad about everything.

Hank's history has led to untreated depression and a roster of coping mechanisms that consists pretty much entirely of alcohol and a partially loaded gun. He isn't really equipped to handle an anxious android on top of that, but he can't bring himself to abandon him either.

The result: Connor moves in.

The result: They begin to help each other.

The result: They fall in love.

((aka conflicts between Connor's opinions and his programming lead to moral OCD, which he deals with badly; he moves in with a still-depressed Hank, which who isn't doing so hot himself; together they learn to deal with their problems and each other a bit better))

cool shit by niltia

Hank hates when Connor puts stuff in his mouth for instrumental analysis. The forensics department personnel, on the other hand, think it’s the best shit ever.

MCR.exe by hopelesspapaya

Cyberlife is about to make a deal with the State Department, but all they have is a prototype with a buggy social module. They stress about that, while Connor tries his best. Meanwhile, Markus learns to play the piano, and develops the artistic taste of an angsty preteen. Kamski and Amanda Struggle through it all.

Canon-era crack taken seriously.

[roominthecastle]

1) do u ship michael/eleanor 2) if yes pls share ur thoughts and feelings :))

*cracks knuckles* Just remember: you asked for this, anon.

1) Yes.

I am oh so predictable and this dynamic offers everything - literally everything - that gets me going, so I got going at once. Like act 1, scene 1,

“Hello, Eleanor. I am Michael and you are dead.”

A dapper amoral non-human puppetmaster becomes emotionally compromised as a kickass mortal woman keeps foiling his ridiculously meticulous plans, and they end up bonding over the confusing struggle of self-improvement, survival, & being messy benches who love dramaaa?

Honestly, they gave me no chance to even consider resisting this.

2) Oh boy. This is where we duck behind a read more bc length & GIFs

I should probably start by saying that as far as strict canon goes, for now, I only see solid evidence of the tightest, beautifulest friendship btw these two, but the potential for “more” is def there, as well, imo. I broship them on the show and ship them like mad in this nice little bubble of Could Be where I’m happy bc canon is generous w/ the fodder. That being said, the furthest I can see canon pushing this ‘ship is a bittersweet unrequited love area, sth like [ this post ] I reblogged the other day. No bitter Friendzoned™ bullshit bc Michael ain’t a gross-ass dick like that. Friendship is his most precious treasure like he kept the spoon Janet gave him and put it on display in his office. My heart almost gave out at that part. I think he felt lonely and isolated among his kind even before his solo project started going off the rails, forcing him to defect to the human side, so I’m sure he would never consider “friendship only” w/ Eleanor to be some second-rate outcome. (neither would I)

But he is only beginning to discover the various dimensions of human relationships, so his feelings are likely in flux and mixed. He might consider chaste romance friendship, too, since he has no previous experience to draw on whatsoever. I mean, feelings are v difficult to sort even w/ plenty experience as evidenced by the humans around him.

Eleanor is to Michael who/what Chidi is to her, imo. Every round of the Eleanor/Chidi dynamic is characterized by a rollercoaster of “is it platonic or is it romantic or both or neither or what the sweet fork is it?”, and I can imagine Michael going through a bit of that confusion himself as he gets more and more attached to Eleanor but w/o the pressure of “pick a label already and act on it”. A general feeling of attraction (not necessarily sexual) would be natural, esp for a being who is experiencing his first intense connection with someone who actively challenges, rewards, and punishes him in ways no other being has before and no human has ever dared before.

She takes him down a few notches, no question. Chidi is the teacher but Eleanor is the one pushing and pulling Michael along their rocky, scary, insane path of self-improvement, which, just like hers, starts out as an empty nuisance deal of self-preservation (“You get help but only if you take ethics lessons”) and turns into a genuine effort to become better. She insists on him taking these lessons and makes sure he “stays in school” despite the initial difficulties. Out of his 4 humans, she is the one he consistently looks to for emotional pointers, support, and validation.

The subtlest (and my most favorite) display of this is how he keeps half-turning back towards her when he pleads their case in front of Judge Gen.

She is his person who has faith in him when no one else does and reaches him when no one else can or want to. She is his anchor pulling him back whenever he drifts off too far, be it as a result of a massive existential/midlife crisis or venting frustrations in his old, cruel ways like tormenting Chidi:

He listens to her and tries to reciprocate even if it means breaking some fundamental rules of the afterlife or turning on his own kind or giving up his immortality or going behind the back of the All-Knowing Judge who can condemn anyone for eternal suffering with a snap of her fingers. This is the same kind of glitch Janet describes in 111 (aptly named “What’s My Motivation”): to act unpredictably and behave in ways that run counter to how you were programmed to behave. a.k.a. the “human error” a.k.a. LOVE

Eleanor just instinctively gets him in every sense of the word bc they are very similar, and while at first it causes alarm, discomfort, and tension for both of them, it transforms into friendship - sth that I believe has its origins in S1 when he is supposed to be faking everything. That day spent together having all kinds of fun has left some genuine positive marks on both, imo, despite both “participating” to cover an agenda.

This bond is now the kind of stuff that would need only a tiny, unexpected spark to ignite. I don’t think it will in ~that~ way on the show since Eleanor is focused elsewhere in that department atm & maybe forever, but the groundwork is def there, so I can imagine billions of excellent fic scenarios blooming from this + as I said somewhere above, a potential canon scenario where Michael harbors unrequited feelings but keeps silent bc it would be a secret he is ethically allowed - maybe even required - to keep. Again, it is one of the lessons that come up when Janet’s “glitching” and they consider breaking up Jason and Tahani as a solution: “It’s not permissible to ruin their happiness to save ourselves. … It’s okay to keep a secret as long as that secret isn’t harming anyone, and telling them that secret might cause harm.” Michael knows Eleanor needs Chidi to stay on course towards eternal happiness, and, given the group’s track record, telling her that he has feelings could cause confusion sufficient enough to derail everything and that’s not permissible. But this is pure speculation ofc.

Despite the circular narrative and reboots, nothing gained is wasted on this show, it only changes forms and feeds further development. For example, everything Michael pretends to feel and do in S1 he ends up feeling and doing for real in the first part of S2, then gradually gains a more thorough understanding of these actions and feelings in the second half via Chidi’s lessons and by watching/helping others deal with their problems. He fakes it till he makes it. He essentially mirrors Janet, the other non-human member of this group dynamic, who unexpectedly bonds with Jason and her behavior becomes erratic as a result and calms only when she understands what is going on and how to deal with it. Michael’s “demon programming” starts glitching, too, and Eleanor is right smack in the middle of that mess.

Janet “orbits” the “Jason-Tahani unit” w/ a link to Jason, Michael the Eleanor-Chidi one w/ a link to Eleanor, which forms the two interconnected triangles of the show - an “arrangement” further reinforced by the image of Janet and Michael glued to Jason’s and Eleanor’s monitoring thingy respectively at the end of S2.

He is the (recovering) devil on Eleanor’s shoulder sitting opposite to Chidi (also they are the only two guys who wear glasses in the afterlife??), but no matter how well they click and how much fun they have together, it’s Chidi whose presence needs to be tangible (800+ reboots proved that), not his, no matter how/what he feels or what he wants. Removing himself from the equation, sacrificing his own wants & needs, is the only way to ensure Eleanor & Co. have a shot at eternal happiness, so he literally pushes her away and advocates for a solution that involves them completely forgetting about him. It is the ultimate act of selfless love if you think about it, and it makes me feel A LOT.

Also just look at them when she sees he did not die and he sees she (and the rest of the gang, I know, but that’s not our focus here) has not been eternally damned yet bc OFC HE COMES BACK WITH ANOTHER IDEA + 369 BACKUP PLANS + CHEAT CODES bc this is the demon who literally tried a billion ways to sneak them into heaven and was plagued with “after sad” when he failed.

And then we have the scene where he just can’t help himself, breaks yet another rule, and sneaks down/up/idk to Earth to nudge his lost pal back on track and she ofc doesn’t remember him bc the Judge wiped her afterlife memories and he pretends to be her BARTENDER in STING’S DESERT ROSÉ (!!) and delights in her drunken ramblings - it is too much goodness like I’m this close to a Cheers rewatch and also just… THESE FOOLS OWN ME NOW