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#did i say fluffl?
freddie-foxs · 2 years
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Modern lawyer!Aemond x pregnant!reader
I do not know what happened. It just happened.
No warnings. Pure fluff
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- Your phone rings in the middle of the day, just as your sitting down on the couch, manoeuvring around your growing belly.
- flicking the screen on, you see that it is your boyfriend, Aemond
- he works as a lawyer in the biggest and fanciest firm in Westeros
- you used to be his secretary until your belly grew too large to sit comfortably behond your desk and he strongly advised you to take maternity leave
- he never calls you unless your temporary replacement has failed miserably in doing something
- Sighing, you pick up the phone
- Aemond?
- silence
- Is something wrong?
- On the other end, he sighs
- Nothing, my love. Just a difficult client giving me a headache
- before you went on leave, you would hug him after difficult clients
- Do you want me to come and beat the shit out of them?
- his laugh, oh, his laugh. It's always the most wonderful sound to you
- No, I just want to...
- he pauses
- no, forget it, it's stupid
- no, whatever you need
- I want to hear her
- You smile and move the phone down to the swell of you belly, positioning the micrphone to he can hear the baby's heartbeat
- He often laid his head on your belly to hear her, especially after a long day
- In his office, Aemond leans back in his office chair, eyes closed and listening to the soft thump, thump of his daughters heartbeat, a daughter you and he have created together
- His door opens
- It's his junior assistant
- He sighs
- My love?
- You move the phone back to your ear
- It's time for my deposition. I will see you later
- See you soon then. Call me if you need to hear her again
- He laughs
- Shall I order in?
- Pizza again?
- I crave pizza
- He laughs again, how you love hearing his rich laugh
- I will see you later, my love. Put our little dragon back on the phone
- You giggle as you move the phone back to you belly
- Now you don't kick your mother too much, she's working very hard
- You hear the 'umm, sir' from his assistant.
- Hang up before your assistant runs off again
- I will see both of you later
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flufflecat · 10 hours
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another day, another addition to my beautiful monster
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ayu-stuff · 1 month
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Mr. Fluffles
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"What's the matttuuuuurr, babieee?? Awwww. Don't cwyyy!!!! You need to understand you're just a wittle giwl, that's it!!! And babygirls don't have boyfriends, cutiepie!!
If you were a mature woman just like me, then you'd be able to keep dating your boyfriend, honey. You wanna know what he has told me? Come closer. Closer, I've said! Crawl to Mama. He's told me that you're just too flat-chested for him!!!! Awwwwww. When will your mosquito bites grow? Puberty did absolutely nothing for you, little girl HAHAHA. And he wants you to know too that he couldn't stand the stinky smell of your poopy diapers, above all when I made you hump him in your nursery to the rhythm of my moans. God, Daddy fingers me so well. I bet he didn't even touch you down there when you were together, did he??
I told you not to cry, or you're getting a spanking. Yes, in front of your now ex boyfriend. Whaaaat??? You don't want Mr. Fluffles to see? But I. Don't. Care. He's the one to have coped with your stupid tantrums since I became your Mommy. Your babyish drool all over him when you cried yourself to sleep was also too much for him to endure, honeybunch. He's told me he wants to find now a real woman, not a smelly, stinky, pissy, poopy, nasty wittle toddler like youu!
Look at yourself now. Sitting on the floor, all covered in tears and drool, with red cheeks and a Sofia the First bib half-covering your flat chest. Pigtails instead of any mature hairstyle. Oversized paci and oversized diapers, and a lingering smell of baby powder mixed with piss. And you think you could compete with me, squirt? You're just a delusional infant.
What now, you say? Well, Mr. Fluffles is mine now. I'm sowwwy, but you're too little to have any boyfriend. Even plushies are too mature for you!! Of course, humpy times will be much more different now. We'll tie you to your crib, looking to the hanging mobile we made out of your shredded adult panties. And you'll hump the air, with no contact whatsoever with Mr. Fluffles or any other plushy: just your messy pamper and your wiggling hips trying to feel adult for once. Exhilarating.
Whaaaat's that, honey??? I told you not to cry, squirt. OVER MY LAP. NOW."
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c4t1l1n4 · 5 months
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I know Spock’s misunderstanding of human things is generally played up, even by Spock himself because he’s a little shit like that, but I like to think there are some things Kirk/McCoy do that he genuinely does not understand.
Like they’re at some sort of carnival/festival and win one of those prize stuffed animals and Spock pretends to think that’s illogical and not understand the point of a worthless trinket but in reality he totally gets wanting to win something for your partner and feels all warm and fuzzy seeing them carry it around all night.
But then he swears, or makes a lewd comment or says something adult and McCoy gasps dramatically and covers the plushie’s ears and is like: “how dare you, Spock?!”
And Spock looks over at Jim all confused, but Jim just nods seriously and is like: “you can’t say something like that in front of Mr. Fluffles.”
And Spock genuinely blue screens.
He’s careful about what he says the rest of the night and when they beam back aboard he finds time to corner Uhura and tries to figure out the best way to ask WTF he did wrong. Uhura gleefully (and between giggles) explains that plushies are “innocent” and should be treated in a similar way as children (with great respect, care and not saying crude/adult things around them.)
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xas24 · 1 year
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more santiago and pedri pleasee? 🥹
maybe a movie night or a bday party or something ?
thanksss🫶🏼
movie nights ~ pedri
summary: santiago’s first movie night with his two favourite people.
more to this mini series can be found on my masterlist :))
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when santiago suggested the idea of a movie night with pedri, y/n was skeptical. she knew how busy her boyfriends schedule was and she didn’t want to bother him. hell, even her own schedule was hectic, with classes, and extra classes on top of that, and going to the gym.
sometimes she couldn’t even work out a time where even her and pedri were free for a little date night. however, it just so happened that her little brother had worked out some time for her.
she didn’t even know how smart this little boy was until she was explaining her whole day to him and he was practically pulling free time out of nowhere. no matter what excuse she threw at him, he shook his head and found a way, which honestly was quite surprising for a kid who spent most of his day either kicking a ball around or playing on his ipad.
in the end, y/n reluctantly found that she couldn’t say no to his big eyes and adorable, hopeful smile. he held the remote to the tv in his hand, already comfy in his sweatpants and hoodie, so she agreed and called pedri over.
santiago was so happy. pedri had stayed over lots of times before, but majority of those times had been in his sisters bedroom doing whatever the hell grown-ups did. he was still relatively new to their relationship, albeit very comfortable with it, he felt a different sort of connection with pedri.
he was like an older brother to him and he wanted to spend as much time with him as he could.
santiago opened up the movie he’d been wanting to watch as he waited. he had also grabbed the biggest blanket in the house and set it down on the couch, already comfortably sitting between it.
it wasn’t long till pedri got there, and the little boy greeted him with the biggest hug and most excited smile ever. pedri couldn’t hold back his own smile due to how contagious the younger ones was.
overtime, pedri had come to realise the little soft spot he had for santiago.
he thought of him as a younger brother, even though he had only known him for a few months so far. he loved his passion for football, just like him, how excited he got at any opportunity to play or talk about or watch football. he also loved the immense respect he held for his family. being the youngest in the family also, pedri adored how well-mannered and respectful the little boy was.
“pedri!!! im so excited you came!” santiago pulled away from the hug and looked up at him with a grin.
“how could i say no to you, hm?” pedri pinched his cheek. he took his shoes off and allowed santiago to pull him into the living room where the lights had been dimmed and the couch had been fluffled to the brim with pillows and one large blanket.
“wow, you did all this, santi?”
the boy gave a proud grin in return and jumped down in the middle of the couch. he patted the space next to him and pedri happily took the seat.
his arm landed around the back of the couch whilst santiago grabbed the remote. instantly, pedris eyebrows slightly furrowed at the empty seat next to santi, starting to wonder where his girlfriend was.
“dónde está y/n?” (where is y/n?)
“aquí.” (here.) y/n walked into the living room with some snacks in her hand and a big bowl of popcorn in the other. she shot pedri a warm smile, one which he immediately reciprocated at the sight of her.
she placed the stuff down on the coffee table infront of them before leaning forward to plant a kiss on pedris lips. the older boy hummed into the peck, lips chasing hers as soon as she pulled away. y/n gave him a little look as if to say later, before turning to santi and running a hand over his hair.
“santi, you picked the movie?”
he nodded in response.
“you didn’t bring the drinks, did you?”
he shook his head, looking back up at his big sister with an innocent pout on his lips. “lo siento, y/n. i forgot.”
y/n ruffled his hair playfully, “it’s okay. i’ll bring them. you start the movie.”
santiago only faced forward again. he didn’t want to start it yet and therefore waited until his sister was back with the drinks and comfortably settled in next to him, before pressing play.
•••
it was about half an hour into the movie and pedri couldn’t help the hand that started wandering towards his girlfriend over the back of the couch.
she was sat so close yet so far, santiago being between the two, and his hands just itched to touch any part of her warm skin. he practically couldn’t sit still.
his fingers reached her shoulder and he started playing with the strap of her top. it was an unconscious act, something he didn’t pay any mind to as his fingers fiddled with the string. y/n couldn’t help the hot blush that started flooding her cheeks at his little action.
normally she wouldn’t mind when he started toying with any part of her clothes or hair, but the fact that, even whilst her little brother was sat between them, he still had to be touching some part of her, made her heart flutter.
y/n didn’t stop her hand when it reached up to his hand on her shoulder, before she could even think about it. her index finger made contact with his and she slowly let her fingers intertwine with his own.
pedri let her. both their eyes stayed focused on the tv infront of them, yet their hands rested interlocked on y/n’s shoulder, pedri brushing his thumb in little circles over her skin. santiago had also cuddled up to pedri, loving the warmth that surrounded him between two of his favourite people.
pedri had smiled at him, looking down at him with such adoration in his eyes as his other hand rested on his little body.
santi couldn’t deny he was loving every second of this; the atmosphere, the warmth, the love. he didn’t want it to end. he’d finally gotten his way and he knew he would definetely be having many more movie nights in the future.
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wolven91 · 1 year
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Don't Feed The Bears
When Sarf encountered her colleague, Yous, it wouldn't have been particularly strange or odd. They were assigned as a pair to a back water planet within ursidain territories to observe and catalogue any new infections or illnesses in the trees of the new nature reserves. This had been one of the planets that had been near stripped clean by their forefather's unchecked greed. The objective was to reseed the world as best they could.
However, what Sarf found confusing was the fact her colleague, a respected scientist in his own right, was crawling on his hands and knees in the clearing. This was a new behaviour to say they least. Sure, he was a bit thin around the waist, but she didn't hold that against him as otherwise he had previously been a reliable partner.
The fact that he had walked into the clearing, but had dropped onto all fours to leave it, caused her incredible confusion, and demanded she announce herself and ask what in the oldest clan circles did he think he was doing?
Yous jumped, flinching in position until he sat backwards onto his rear and had the good decency to look a bit sheepish as he kept his head low, but slowly met her gaze. Sarf just sighed and shook her head, she was aware his size made him susceptible to bullying and didn't want to add to it, but the matter had to be addressed.
"I just want to know why you're crawling around through the forest. Are the kitchen crew bullying you again?"
"No, well... they never stopped, but no, this isn't that." The male explained, now avoiding looking at Sarf in the eyes. She watched as the ursidain was constantly scratching at the back of his paw in a nervous tick.
"I've found something out..." He said in a whisper despite their solitude from their own kind on the garden world in the making.
"The young humans..." Yous said.
"The cubs?" Sarf inclined her head, the odd, tiny, thin, and gangly creatures. The pair of botanists had been made aware that a single family unit of humans was hiding on the planet and to avoid them if possible. With just how rare humanity was, the ursidain government, like everyone else, had offered to secret populations of humans away in hidden locations within their territory. An unused infant forestry planet, with minimal to no dangerous fauna remaining did occur to Sarf as a perfect place to raise a cub, human or ursidain now she considered it. Yous continued however.
"They know us, long before meeting one of our kind properly it seems. They have a different name for us though; there's a young one and her family over in the next clearing. Just... let me show you?" He said, trying to convince her that he wasn't mad. Sarf grimaced and waved him forward. He deserved a chance, either he was sick and she would help or he had a point that she wasn't seeing without being shown.
With a roll of her eyes and a half shrug to agree for him to go for it, he rolled back over onto his four stumpy limbs and began to trudge forward, lumbering into the undergrowth. She wouldn't copy him but would hide herself from view. Watching the male lumber forwards reminded her just how close to feral beasts the ursidain people could look. She had barely propped herself up on a tree when a noise called out.
"Fluffles?" asked an unknown, but unmistakable voice of a child.
Sarf tucked herself behind an old tree, it was barely just wide enough to hide the majority of her bulk, except for the half of her face so she could spy on her colleague.
A young cub of a human came padding out from behind a bush, looking around for something... or someone it seemed more likely considering her colleague approaching her. Her dress was light, pink and flowing in the lazy breeze of the forest. She carried in her hand, a small bundle. Sarf didn't want to confidently guess the cub's age, but she suspected possibly five? Maybe six?
Yous spoke, turning the child's head towards him.
"Hello."
Sarf noticed a distinct lack of any translators in the child's ears and doubted they would have subjected her to any implants. To the human, her colleague would be only grunting or rumbling as humans struggled to understand the ursidain language, despite attempting to teach them the nuances. As soon as she caught sight of the ursidain's broad shoulders her face lit up and she bounded over to him, throwing her arms around his neck and mashing her face into his deep brown fur.
Yous, a runt by ursidain standards, completely dwarfed the tiny, delicate looking cub. Her arms didn't meet round the back of his head, despite him lowering himself down to her level. She released her hold, took a step back, and waggled an accusing finger at her colleague.
"You're late!" The young one accused, but all Yous did in return was fall back on his haunches and mumble an apology.
"I got you breakfast!" She continued, unworried about the massive creature as she presented a small bundle to him, and without hesitation or fear of becoming food herself, presented the food to Yous who happily plucked it from her hands in between claws as big as her whole hand and gobbled the food down with little issue.
Sarf became immensely jealous immediately, eyes bulging at what just happened.
Human food was delicious. This was a fact of the stars that sat alongside water being wet and fire; hot. Every ursidain knew this, but to find a human was already obscenely rare, to have a human cook for you?! How could her colleague hide this from her!?
To the little girl's perspective, her 'best friend'; a giant teddy bear she had encountered exploring the areas surrounding her parent's log house, was one of the greatest things she had found in her life. She had no memory of Earth, Bears as they were on Earth of old were no more; she hadn't been taught every extinct animal yet, so her only knowledge of the likeness of the ursidain was of her teddy bear, that still stood guard over her bed as she fed the 'real' teddy bear. To her mind, her teddy bear had merely come to life and was protecting her family just as her stuffed one protected her.
When the second 'teddy bear' appeared out of the undergrowth, the little girl's joy was immeasurable. She immediately exclaimed she'd go get more breakfast and ran off at full pelt, the last pink frill disappearing within moments.
Sarf plonked herself down next to Yous and made no comment as she mimicked him as best she could. She looked him over, ruffled the fur on top of her skull and tried to relax her shoulders. She believed she was aiming for 'dopey', if it was described with a single word. Sarf had spent years ensuring she was taken seriously, losing her slow accent and carrying herself to lessen the natural ponderous gait of ursidains.
All gone at the first hint that she might get to try human food.
"Told y-"
"Shut up."
Tip Jar
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bg-brainrot · 10 months
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Time to write something for the BG3 Holiday Fluffle! I wanted to do it for days, but finally got around to it-- fluff!
Prompt: Twinkling Lights
Featuring: Astarion x Rogue!Tav
Series: Fits into Love at First Knife
Premise: Astarion and Rogue!Tav are more used to snuffing lights out, not putting up lights, but after a visit from one of their former companions, they realize that maybe, just for the season, they can make an exception.
Tags: Fluff, heights?, Established Relationship, POV Second Person, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, decorating
Word count: ~800
“Come on, Astarion,” you say, pushing your lover to the front of your house. “It won’t take longer than an hour.”
“That’s an hour we could better spend doing literally anything else,” he responds in a whine, all but digging his heels into the ground.
You can see the hardline of his shoulders as he resists, the open distaste on his face, but you don’t relent. “Gale said our house looked depressing. We don’t want our house to look depressing. Or to be made fun of by Gale!”
It was a winter tradition, to decorate your abode in bright lights and garish colors– something about warding against ice elementals in the chillier months. Likely some old wive’s tale, but you don’t care. You refuse to let Gale criticize your as-of-yet undecorated house.
“But it’s chilly outside,” he says with an exaggerated pout on his face. “Surely you wouldn’t make your sad, cold lover endure the snow?”
“It’s not snowing, Astarion,” you say, gesturing through your door to the clear night sky in front of you.
The vampire gives a click of his tongue, and finally begins to walk forward. “Ugh, fine, but I expect you to warm me up once we’re done.”
“It would be my pleasure,” you reply, as you follow him out the door. “Now grab on to the other end of this string of faerie lights that Gale gave me.”
Astarion dutifully takes the opposite end as you begin to climb the face of your house. “Darling, what in the sweet hells are you doing?” he asks, trying to hide the panic in his voice.
“Putting up these lights, what else would I be doing?” you respond, from halfway up the house.
He gives you a smile, a forced one that shows the tips of his fangs. “Yes, I see that. But don’t you want to use a ladder or perhaps a scroll?”
You pause your climbing for a moment. “Huh, that would have been a good idea. I’m already here though. Don’t worry, love! I’m a professional.”
Astarion remains silent for a moment, and you can practically hear the thoughts coursing through his head. I love an idiot. What am I supposed to do with this idiot? Why are these silly little lights worth any of this effort? This is all Gale’s fault.
All the while, you string up the lights with the help from your belt of thieves' tools. You begin humming a holiday song once you find a steady balance.
You enter such a lull that when Astarion next speaks, you almost fall off in surprise. “I think I can catch you.”
“What?” you ask, certain you’ve misheard what your lover said.
“If you fall,” he says, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “In fact, I know I can catch you.”
You’re not sure if it’s the cold air or the unwarranted confidence in Astarion’s voice, but you feel a chill run down your spine. “No thank you, dear. We might both perish.”
He scoffs, placing his hands on his hips, ready to argue his point. The sudden movement accidentally jerks the string of lights out of your hand, throwing you off-balance. Your foot slips and your arms frantically spin as you to try to right yourself.
“I’ve got you!” you hear below you, before you begin to plummet.
The hard crash you were expecting never came, and you find yourself floating gently down to the ground, landing squarely in Astarion’s waiting arms.
You look at him, quizzically. “How did you–”
He laughs at your confusion, before placing you gently on the ground. “I stole Gale’s boots.” As if to prove his point, he shows a foot off to you. You recognize the boots as Mystra's Grace, remembering that they grant Featherfall to their user. “I mostly did it because Gale annoyed me, who knew they would come in handy!”
“Oh,” you breathe out, heart still pounding in your ears. “Good foresight, dear.”
The grin he gives you is wicked as he responds, “Clearly a sign from the gods to steal from Gale more often.”
You give him a lighthearted smack on the arm before you turn back to the house, lights half-hung, haphazardly strewn across your roof. “What do you think?” you ask him, a grimace on your face.
“I like it. Very… artistic,” he turns toward it, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you in to admire your ‘handiwork’ with him. A moment passes of simply staring into the loud, vibrant lights before he continues, “You know I’m more used to a life in the shadows, but I suppose this is nice too.”
You lean into his embrace, tilting your head toward him as you respond, “Isn’t it? Though, I do think I still prefer the shadows.”
“Mm, why is that?” Astarion asks, humming into your hair.
“It’s far less embarrassing when I slip,” you mutter as you bury your heated face into his shoulder.
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amethysts-tavern · 10 months
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Gifts
Astarion x Tav: gender neutral, no physical description or class mention. Written for the BG3 Holiday Fluffle.
You had always admired Astarion for being able to pick locks and disarm traps. One day at camp you ask him if he’d teach you. He was reluctant at first, thinking it was a waste of time since he’d be there to unlock anything you needed. But when you said that you might need to pick a lock to get out of jail or shackles or some other tight spot, he was more than happy to oblige.
Astarion lends you a set of thieves tools. They are rusty and pitted. One pick was missing its tip. Two tools were missing altogether and the straps holding the kit together had worn off a long time ago. But it’s what you had available and would be fine for a beginner to play around with.
As the weeks worn on, Astarion would bring you increasingly complicated locks during your sessions and talk you through them. His latest was giving you trouble. You’d been stuck on it for a week.
“No, no, the pick goes here,” Astarion points his finger at a cog in the lock, leaning over your shoulder to do so. “Then it’s a counter-clockwise twist with the screw.”
“Harumph!” you huff, dropping your tools. “Why is this so hard?!”
“You can do this Tav, you’re just getting flustered. Let’s reset it and try again,” Astarion reaches for the lock.
“No, I’m done. I’ve hit my wall with this,” you start to stand up, but Astarion pushes your shoulders down so you can’t.
“Tav, when you came to me to learn this stuff, you were worried that you’d need to use it in a real emergency. Do you think Gortash uses beginner locks? You have to learn this. I need you to learn this,” Astarion says, sitting down next to you. “Besides, you’re going to need it if you want to open your Christmas present,” he says, pulling out an ornate box with inlays in the shape of a goose. The box has tiny locks all around its edge. Astarion hands it to you.
You take the box and gingerly turn it over in your hands. The contents rattle a bit when you turn it upside down.
“Well, don’t break it. Get started on those locks! You’ve got 2 days until Christmas and I expect to see you open the gift before then.”
You pick up your scavenged thieves tools and get to work. Astarion doesn’t leave your side, but doesn’t say a word as you fidgit with the tiny mechanisms. He watches as you deftly click tumblers and twist cogs in the locks, popping them open one at a time.
He knows the last one is a tricky lock. He had it made that way. You’re down to one last tumbler in the last lock when Astarion’s eyes brighten. He knows you’re close to your prize, but he knows this is the toughest bit - a smaller version of the same tumbler of the lock you gave up on. He leans over and gently whispers, “You’ve got this, Tav. You’re doing great!”
You smile at his encouragement and feel the final tumbler click. “I did it! Holy crap, I did it!”
You throw your arms around Astarion. He chuckles happily, clearly proud of you. “You finally got it, Tav!”
“Because I had a great teacher! Can I open it up?” you’re almost giddy.
“Please do. You deserve it,” Astarion gestures to the box.
You squee like a toddler and lift the lid to find a brand new thieves tools kit with a note that says: “I will never not be around to help you out of tight spots, but just in case… you’ve earned these. Love, Astarion”
You untie the leather straps and unfurl the kit. Your fingers dance across the shiny metal implements before you turn to your teacher.
“I don’t know what to say…” you start, and without thinking, quickly place your lips on his. “Thank you.”
If you weren’t absolutely sure that it was impossible, you’d have sworn that you saw Astarion blush.
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mariamariquinha · 4 months
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Versos de Placer (Colonel Carrillo x f!reader) - Fourteen
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Summary: A letter for you.
Word count: 5.3k
Warnings: Bad words, slight violence, more daddy issues, fluff, mention of sickness, some angst and... did I say fluffl?
Author’s Note: Oof, I really thought about how would I say goodbye to this story. There's so much I want to say, but for now I hope the words I wrote here makes some difference in what we build as a small community of mutual interest in writing and appreciating what we had of Carrillo.
Quite a journey to get here, right? And I should thank everyone for each conversation, each comment and appreciation towards this. As a non-English speaker, bring all of this here had been a challenge, but one I accepted with love.
As always, I hope I could give a good end for this love story. See ya!
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
Join my taglist! Don’t forget to reblog, comment and like! As always, I would love to know what you’re all thinking! ❤
******
I wish I had done it differently, yes, but I don't think you should forgive me anyway. You don't know me and, by extension, you have every right to doubt my nature. Honestly, I recognize that that letter changed my life, as it reaffirmed that even though I’m in front of bullets or knives or big violent men every day, I’m still my father's daughter, which makes me a coward.
The Sun was burning your scalp a little, so you scratched the top of your head now and again because the heat was bothering you. From afar, you saw the small commotion in front of the building: people going out and about, fuzzing over each other. He didn’t exactly tell you where he was staying (you didn’t ask either), but the badge could do some convincing, such as your name. At least you hoped so. 
You looked at both sides of the street before crossing and, when you did, you ended up bumping into a girl – you apologized, even if a little bewildered, and she said everything was fine with a smile that you hadn't seen in those surroundings for a long time. That caught you a little by surprise, so you watched her go with a dumb expression in the middle of the sidewalk. 
“Permiso,” Excuse me, You said, approaching the doorman who was sitting in the empty lobby with his arms crossed.
He was cooperative and friendly, but said he wasn't sure if there would be anyone with that name there because the Americans were already leaving. Still, he called the hamal in apartment 15 (you saw him do it over his shoulder) and, shortly after, said that you were lucky and could come up.
Your father was already at the door when the elevator arrived and, for a moment, the two of you stood there for almost a minute just staring at each other without saying anything, as if you were meeting for the first time. He knew there was something you wanted to say that was unconventional, at least by the way he looked you up and down suspiciously, but he didn't give in to asking the question. With a gesture of his head, your father suggested (not offered, suggested) for you to come closer and you did so, just like when you were a child and had to ask permission to sit at the dinner table to eat. 
The apartment itself was already empty, except for a few pieces of furniture that were still scattered around and would probably be collected later. The floor creaked a little because it was made of parquet and the walls were obviously old – weird for someone with so much 'caliber', but you understood that maybe it was just a disguise for the neighbors.
“I still have a bottle of whiskey around here somewhere,” He said, even if not moving a muscle to reach for the said thing. 
“I’m good,” You shook your head, in time to see him agreeing silently. 
An awkward silence followed the decline. With that, you gave yourself another chance to look around and find something to comment on before going straight to the point. 
“When is your flight?” 
“In about three hours,” He shrugged. “I believe that the Embassy didn’t ask you to give me a ride like the first time.”
“You would know if they did,” You smile didn’t quite reach your eyes. He saw that and responded the same way, even pulling a chair out of the small table in the living room to make himself comfortable for a confrontation. 
“What is it then? Did I forget to file some paperwork or something? Because if that's the case, I have to let you know that I-” 
“Were you the one who killed Juan Marcos?”
The question caught him off guard, but not in a harsh way – he probably felt more outrage for the fact that you interrupted him, something he never took quite well. For a moment, then, your father just stared back at you, then scoffed as if you were stupid. 
“Thinking about leaving flowers on his grave before you leave?” 
“I don't think your moral compass is adjusted enough for you to remember which ditch you used to dispose of his body,” You crossed your arms over your chest, not failing for a moment to spit out your thoughts. 
“Don't be moralistic.”
“Don’t worry about it. We’ve just been in this hell for so long, right? Catching criminals, doing the dirty work… that’s enough for you to give me some answers.” 
Again, a bit of quietness, but a contemplative one. He had that easy expression on his face, as if you two were discussing the weather, one that always put you on the edge of pure rage. You waited patiently, tho.
“... I did.”
“How.”
“You saw him, you know how.”
“Is this the kind of thing you would do for a daughter?” 
“It is, because I did,” He said calmly. “Is this some kind of intervention? This is what you want? Resolve all the frustrations you have with me now, hours before I, what’s that you said? Disappear from your life?” 
You looked at him with pursed lips, feet tapping on that stupid floor to prevent any more unwanted feelings. It felt like the Sun was burning your scalp again, so you unconsciously scratched that area again before rolling your shoulders and staring at him with a stone cold expression – one you certainly got from his side of the family. The question was there, burning in your lungs and throat, ready to leave your mouth and make him lose that sarcastic smile on his face. 
“... Would you do that for a son?”
The decline in his comfort was gradual, progressive, millimetric. The corners of his mouth lowered into a straight line, his jaw tightened, and his eyes darkened intensely. You flexed your fingers discreetly, trying to hide your defensive posture with the possibility of another aggressive approach on his part, but all he did was access you cautiously while looking for the justification for your question in the way you stood there, in front of him.
“What did you do?” He frowned, probably not sure of the end of that topic. 
“Me? Nothing,” You shrugged, head shaking. “Your son did.”
Your father rose from his seat with a harsh scrape of the chair but you kept still, glaring back at him. He could come closer, could do what he did in the office; it wouldn’t happen, though. You both knew, somehow, that someone was his weak point, the thing that couldn’t make him have good nights of sleeping for a reason you’ll never understand. 
That made you scoff a laugh before averting your gaze. 
“Now you know how it is.”
“Oh, so that’s what it is? Revenge?” His voice was so harsh, so taken by reticence and rage, that it made him static in a certain type of fury. 
“I think my best revenge was knowing that you got what you wanted most and he was nothing like what you expected,” You took one step closer, then another, and you two stood there, eye to eye. “Can you imagine? Being your son and having decency?”
“You better-”
“I better what? What, dad? Shut my mouth? Stop talking about Jorge? Or should I wait until you give me the first blow?”
Nothing. He stood there like a bull, fuming and grinding his teeth – no hand raised, no closed fists. 
“You asked what I want with all this, with this drama… I never expected anything I discovered about your life to be ethical or clean. You do whatever you want,” You shrugged again, this time going full exaggerated with a fake coy expression. “What I want is for you to take that plane, go back to the States and spend the rest of your days thinking of how your beloved son couldn’t be any more different than you in anything, better than you in anything and a man you’ll never be even closer to be. All that while being raised by a whore.” 
The slap was a familiar feeling, like that specific side of your face had a shape to fit his open hand like a glove. Even the movement of your head, the mixing of your insides, it had a natural way to flow, to go this way or another. Still, you’d been caught by surprise, so next thing you knew, your gum was bleeding – you could taste blood on the tip of your tongue, see it on the tip of your fingers when you assessed the small damage. It had the sting, the sharp pain, but that didn’t get a rise out of you. 
“That’s what you told him? That I’m your bad father who didn't beat you enough to give you good manners?”
“... Why would I need good manners? I’m a whore, right? Good manners wouldn’t make me fuck Carrillo like I wanted to and you couldn’t do shit to stop it,” That came out with such a force. “In all my life, nothing made me more happy than to trespass your limits as much as I could, to make you show your true colors and still put that scary expression on your face.”
With this, you took a few steps back, adjusting your clothes and smiling, the inside of your mouth and your teeth probably red from the blood. 
“Take that plane, go back home. I know that you’ll lie in your bed tonight knowing that you’ll have the same future as that damned Juan Marcos, alone in a grave that no one’ll visit.” 
It was as if thousands of years and hurt had finally created the courage to leave your shoulders, as if all the suffering he put your mother through had transformed into a controlled and punctual fury in your heart. A return. An end. And you left there knowing that, with that, you closed a cycle that gave you a happiness more sincere than Escobar's dead body on that roof.
******
Two days before…
You weren’t with your work clothes, so the heat was more bearable with the tank top. The worn out jeans were still there, just as the old boots, and just as the gun and badge. Habits. Carrillo looked at you beside him in the car, arms crossed with the stance of that old self, full Colonel mood of his. 
“Are you sure the info is relatable? Safe?”
“I am. Do you want me to bring all of the Colombian Army to this when you all should be celebrating something out there?” You turned to him with a teasing smile, seeing the frown on his face getting even more deeper. “Horacio-”
“Some of them are still out there. You should at least let Trujillo do a-”
“You’re already here with me, Horacio, and this is already too much. There’s people who need you right now.”
Instead of answering, he let you hold his toned arms, then both sides of his neck to melt some of his stubbornness in avert your gaze. Not getting a reaction, you tilted your head to get a better look of his face, jaw tightening in insistence, which made you sigh and let him go. 
“You don’t know him,” He said. 
“I’m aware.”
“And we’ve been through enough to be suspicious.”
“I’m aware,” You insisted, brows raised. “To be honest, I don’t know if I wanna do this but… If it’s him, if… I need to be sure.” 
“Why?” 
For a moment you just stared at his confused expression, not knowing the right answer to that – not sure if you had one. Then you pursed your lips, shook your head and averted his eyes to look through the window, where you could see the small house from afar. 
“... When my father left, my mother kind of disappeared. Mentally. It was as if the lights were on but no one was home,” Your tone was recoiled, way too low for someone so confident about their decisions. “He said some things to her, said this country was hell but even some cheap pussy could give him what he wanted. I honestly didn’t even know why he needed so much to have a son.”
You could feel Carrillo watching you carefully while you used that false calmness to explain what you wanted to say clearly.
“This made me spend time with my paternal grandparents because she couldn't bear to see me. I was a very complicated, restless child, so when my grandfather started using the old methods he used with my father and uncles when I messed up, I understood why he wanted a boy.”
You felt a weight on your chest, one that almost made you cry.
“At least I think I understand. He wanted to take out the frustrations of what he went through on someone and I was a girl, so naturally I couldn't handle punishment or fits of rage. I would have marks like my mother had and that would make things more complicated for his conscience. A boy could be molded to be strong, resilient. I was always too emotional for him.” 
Like the perpetuation of the species to whom he could transfer descendants or something like that. Bullshit. 
“I understand. Well, at least I think I would be that kind of person if things weren't different.”
“I don't think it's the same thing,” You shook your head. “You're here, that's more than he's ever done.”
“Because I love you.”
“And if you had children, you would love them too.”
Carrillo didn’t say anything. The idea of ​​children only crossed his mind when he was younger, as soon as he married Juliana, and it seemed so distant that he forgot what it would be like to imagine a life with children. You didn't want that, that's for sure; Given the life you two had, it would even be selfish to bring a child into the world. And even if the car was so quiet, so… calm, Carrilo always had the feeling that someone was lurking, and he felt bad for thinking that, in another time, he would be the same type of father as your father was.
You could feel, little by little, how his hand sneaked closer to yours, the tip of his fingers carefully passing through your knuckles before going up to your wrist. It was so soft, the way he touched you to test the water, to not invade your space, that when his hand reached for your forearm, pulling you just enough to make you turn to him, nothing could stop you from hugging him as if your life depended on it, pressing against his body fiercely. 
He didn't say anything because he didn't know how to say anything, because it wasn't like hearing the news that your father was coming to Colombia. Horacio was never good with soothing words. He knew how to act, that's for sure; in that case, if it were possible, if that sliver of humanity were to come away from him once and for all, your father would become a ghost like everyone else.
Well, but you already knew that – he had told you that when he recovered you from another low blow from your father. Selfishly, Horacio would always do his best to create miles of distance between the things he truly loved and those who risked any trace of peace he had achieved. And maybe you didn't know this, but he had made this promise to himself.
I'm not going to lose anymore, Horacio pressed you tighter against him, staring at the wall with the coldness of his decision. I don’t accept that.
“Let’s do this.”
******
I imagine to this day that you would never like Horacio. You always seemed too ‘communist’, progressive enough, but you would laugh until your stomach hurt at how stubborn he was. Still, I don't want to convince you to like him; I just want to tell you that it wasn't him who told me to leave before I could see you that day. You were fine, you were beautiful (I still know you are) and you were holding a baby in your lap, which I later realized was that of one of the patients you saved during an emergency birth. I was only there for 30 minutes and I heard people say more good things about you than they could ever say about me in my entire life. That's when I knew I had to leave you alone.
I cried in his arms later; I would cry a lot more in the years that followed, but I reserved every minute of my future life, the life I never planned for myself, to gather all the memories of what I could tell you one day. No, I'm not dying, at least not from my health, because you know that everyone dies one day, but I've been writing to you because I want you to know that you don't deserve the family you have because you're too good for us.
I want to tell you about Horacio. I want to tell you what we did and how I miss some things in life. I want to tell you this because I know he could be a solid bridge between the two of us, the person who would interpret you for me and interpret me for you. My mother would never be able to do it because of resentment, our father because of disregard and we because of ignorance.
Horacio, however, was my surprise during the time I spent in Medellín. If I want you to know me, I want to be able to reveal my best side, what I truly achieved when I decided I would love him.
******
It was strange not having plans, but you got on the plane alone. Horacio couldn't go with you, not at that moment; there was love between you, yes, but there was also responsibility, and he would never leave his own country behind. You understood. During the time you spent in Bogotá (not in Medellín), the two of you did things together: went out to dinner, visited places, had sex… Things that couples did. When you got on the plane, it was with the uncertainty that things would one day be okay, and that you would be able to reconcile life in Los Angeles with what had happened to the two of you in Colombia.
This was our father's fault and I'm completely sure of that. I was disallowed from having any further contact with the case, which I understood as private revenge for what I did, as if he wanted to take away more of the happiness you could have had if you were to work with Peña and Horacio later. I always resented him for that, I still do. Maybe it wasn't the worst thing he had done and today I know it wasn't, but it was as if every minute of my life, he took away a little of my happiness.
The letters you exchanged were always long, which went quite against his personality. It was as if, finally, he said in words everything he thought, did and gave his opinion. On your part, there were important descriptions, such as how much your mother was fond of him and the cases you worked on at the DEA. He, on the other hand, mentioned the well-known day to day life with Peña, what they worked on and how he missed you, above all, which hurt your heart.
“God, you have to put an end to this. I want to see you happy again, my daughter, and I want to meet him.” 
In one of them, which was a call, he told you something that he kept so deeply within himself that he was certain that, one day, he would come back to you for good and that there would be no turning back.
“I want to marry you. I see no other choice and I have no other way out. I need to assure myself that I’ll no longer have to tolerate this ordeal without knowing that I’ll come home and find you.” 
“Don't be so dramatic... I know people who would find our obstacles small compared to what they go through. I’ll wait for you, no matter how long it takes.”
“So wait. The next time we see each other, I'll have a ring to put on your finger.” 
You know, I always thought he was a brute, but Horacio never failed to keep his promises. In fact, he came back with a ring, and we actually got married, which was a simple thing that meant enough to both of us. We moved to El Paso. It was close to Peña, in fact, and sometimes we spent holidays together, which I never thought would happen. Maybe, thinking about it now, it's those moments that I miss most.
“Is that white hair?”
“Fuck off, we both know we’re getting old,” You elbowed Javier in the guts, puffing smoke in the Texan hot air. “By the way, you’re getting a belly down there. Don’t come at me.”
“What I gained, you lost. Have you been eating?” 
No was the proper answer. He knew it was, and that was why he asked. Still, you shrugged, taking another drag. 
“... Yes.”
“Hey-”
“I am, Javi, I promise. It's just been different.”  
“I hope so. One of you needs to remain standing.”
It was around the time our father passed away. Well, I can't say for sure if it was too close or too far, especially since he fulfilled his own mission of dying alone. I didn't have the opportunity to talk after he got sick; I didn't even know if he had someone. Today I'm almost the same age as he was when I was in Medellín and I can't see him in myself, while I don't know if I would live my life differently if he asked me for forgiveness. Below I leave exactly where he is buried and, if you want, you can visit him. If you're the praying type, decide if it makes sense to give him the privilege of prayer; God knows I'd like that too.
******
At that point of things, you made fun of Horacio for not actually marrying you like the tradition said, just giving you the ring he promised he would, but you understood that the world didn't survive on big events like that.
When he found out what the diagnosis was, you went straight to the computer and did your research. It wasn't that you didn't believe the doctors, but the first step to acceptance was denial, and you knew how to do that very well. At the time, you had just been promoted to an important position in Mexico. You found a good doctor there who could treat him, and the offer didn't get as much back-up as you thought it would – it was like he thought he was going to die.
It was a very different change than it had been when you went to Colombia years before. There was no urgency, no hustle, just the tranquility of a bureaucratic job with a good house, space for a yard and a good salary. 
“It's in the early stages, so it's a relatively simple treatment. The change in routine and habits will be more severe, so I would be more attentive to that.”
You decided to stop smoking along with him because of this and, deep down, Horacio was a little upset at having to stop this habit.
“I don't know, I just feel embarrassed,” He said one night, you two sitting on the porch because he wanted to take a look at the street. “I didn't imagine that my life would end without emotion.”
“You won't die like this, stop being an idiot.”
“How can you know?”
“Well, because I just know.”
Not every day was easy and, honestly, coming to Mexico was the acid test for many things in my life. Interestingly, I never thought about giving up Horacio, and if I was honest with myself, I also thought that one day I would die from a gunshot or something that would make newspaper headlines. He would never admit it, and neither would I, because it seemed inconceivable, but having that life made us feel grateful and, most of all, lucky.
It was also at this time that I decided to get back in touch with you. He made a promise that if he was cured of cancer, he would include forgiveness for his own past, so we started slowly. I met Juliana (and the three children she had), and I started visiting our father almost religiously every year. We went back to Texas to see Javi, and sometimes we went to Miami to visit Steve. Horacio had reservations about my country, but he could appreciate some things that I think you might like too.
Jorge, I know that our life could have been different and I, as an older sister, feel responsible for being able to give you some glimpses of life with a family up here that loves you, because I would like that too. Along with these letters, I also send tickets to the capital, for you and your husband, if you want to visit us. Horacio is a great tour guide and I, interestingly enough, learned to be a great hostess.
I apologize for having done all this so late. Well, apologies are never enough, but I feel that this phase of my life, the phase of gray hair and wrinkles on my face, terribly nicknamed 'better years', is the right time for the two of us to reconcile for someone who left us behind.
I miss what we didn't have. Even if you don't want to, which I understand, know that my life is only complete because I know that a part of me is also in you.
******
“Appealing to nostalgia?”
Horacio barely raised his head from where he was staring at a box full of old trinkets. Through the mess of the office, he went straight to the memories of Medellín, rooting around and reliving the years in the dust, and he seemed focused enough to barely pay attention to you.
You could say that the guests were already arriving, that he should take a shower soon to welcome them, but the scene seemed so peaceful that you were afraid to interrupt and decided to participate.
“You have that perfume again,” He murmured right when you touched a framed picture of him and Trujillo alongside other stuff. 
“Does that bother you?” You eyed him over your eyeglass lenses, to which he tsked and shook his head. 
“You’re also appealing to nostalgia.”
“Huh, I remember that was the first thing you noticed about me when we met.” 
Horacio then looked back at you and, seeing your mischievous smile, smiled back, leaning back on the chair to give you full attention. 
“You drove me crazy, that's what.”
“I didn't know that was the effect it had on you. In fact, I was sure you hated me.”
“Because I couldn't want you and I wanted you.”
You left the frame in the box and walked over to him, walking around the table to sit on his lap, which he gladly accepted. For a few moments, you stood there, motionless, staring at his face, not knowing exactly what to say, just… admiring him, the grays on his hair and the lazy grin splattered there. 
“What are you thinking?” He asked then, always eager to get inside your head. 
“I always imagine that we wouldn't be here if we didn't live what we lived there,” You pondered, a hand massaging the side of his neck. “And it's weird because people have lost so much. Do you think we deserve it?”
“Is this part of your reconciliation process?”
“Yeah, I guess. I've been thinking about some things... I'm writing you a letter, even.”
“But I'm not going anywhere.”
“I know,” You pecked his lips softly. “Who knows, maybe I can express it with words instead of hiding it on paper.”
Horacio stared at you for a bit, his brow furrowed and the mechanisms moving in his head. You thought it was strange.
“What?”
“I want to read you something.”
You got up so he could look for what he was finding, and when he did, he took a notebook out of a box, accompanied by yellowed sheets of paper.
“I wrote these things while we were in Colombia.”
“And what exactly is it?”
“In the beginning, it was a diary of missions and operations that we carried out. The day you arrived, I ended up writing 'perfume' instead of 'precision', which made me realize that the feeling wouldn't leave my head. I didn't stop thinking about you after that, so I started… I don't know, writing down things about you, what you did, what irritated me and what I liked.”
There was no way to react, more out of shock than offense at him having kept it in for so long. You imagined a Carrillo from the past, a thousand times more stubborn and stubborn, taking the time to write about a woman he couldn't stand. Maybe sitting alone at night in the office, cigarette in one hand and whiskey in the other, mumbling swear words while saying he liked something about you, disbelieving his own feelings.
Then he took that photo that Steve had taken, which he stole and caused temporary chaos with your colleagues. You, younger, tired but with a spark of life, an eagerness to do the right things. 
You watched him as he looked at the photo and felt a warm feeling in your heart that seemed more frequent since you started having more moments together.
When he started reading what he wanted, you could barely move.
“I don't know what this woman did to me and I try hard every day not to ruin everything because I think about her so much. The perfume drives me crazy, the defiant eyes impress me and, oh my, lately I've noticed how incredibly mind-blowing those jeans make her. I have no one to express these feelings to, perhaps because I can't say in words what I imagine when I think of her.”
“Today she told me to go fuck myself. I had to suppress my satisfying smile when I saw that fire in her eyes when she spat those words in my face, because I purposely provoked her into being angry with me, thinking I wanted a reason to get her away from me. In the end, I know that that exact reaction was what I wanted, that she will never give up because she is too stubborn to do so. She goes to the end. She is true to what she believes. I'm sure I'm in love.”
“If nothing were as it were, I would ask her to dinner. I would see her eyes light up in the candlelight, I would make all the romantic moves and show a side of me that no one knows. I want to see her confused, I want to surprise her, and then I want to kiss her, make love to her, and feel every inch of that sweaty skin beneath my fingers while I see her sigh with the pleasure I'm going to offer. I want her, I want her so much, and I feel bad for every kind of thought I might have about her.”
“I call these verses, then. Versos de Placer, in my mother tongue, one that she knows how to say and that is even more beautiful when it comes out of her mouth. Verses that I will never be able to recite out loud, not to her, but I will be able to remember as the spark of a good memory of the complicated days we spent hating ourselves because the world we are in is destroying us. Always her, and never anyone who isn't her or who even looks like her.”
“Always her and her perfume and her accent and her presence. Always.” 
******
No pressure tags:
@cheesybadgers
@thesandbeneathmytoes
@616wilsons
@nessamc
@thoroughlymodernminutia
@padbrookcottage
@seaweeden
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shinestarhwaa · 1 year
Text
The morning after || Song Mingi
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Genre: Fluff
Pairing: Boyfriend!Mingi x gn!reader
Word count: 514
Warnings/tags: Fluffy fluffy fluffles, mentions of virginity loss, idk man it's really just tooth rotting fluff.
Tell me if I missed anything!
@anyamaris @a-soft-hornytiny @veronicasawyerschainsaw @whatudowhennooneseesyou @star1117-archives @wooyoungmybelovedhusband
Tell me if you wanna be added to my taglist!❣️
ENJOY!
-
''Good morning, baby.''
You felt his nose nuzzled up in your neck, taking in your natural scent. Mingi softly pressed kisses in your neck, then on your jaw and ending with a peck on your lips. You couldn't help but smile so wide your cheeks hurt. ''Goodmorning, Mingi,'' you said as your caressed his face gently.
''How did you sleep?'' he asked, wrapping his arms tightly around your body. ''I slept well,'' you giggled, ''sleeping in your arms definitely helped.'' He grinned in his usual goofy way. ''Glad to help,'' he said, kissing your head. ''Do you want some breakfast? I can bake some pancakes. Now, I'm not too excellent but I can try.''
You laughed, stroking his hair. ''I'd love that, let's do that together, hm?'' The two of you got up, and you hissed, feeling sore from last night. You and Mingi hadn't been together for that long yet, and yesterday you slept together for the first time. Besides that, it was your first time ever.
You remembered his lips being everywhere, his hands holding your smaller ones and his voice. You'd never forget such a magical night. And now here you were, in your underwear and his sweater that was huge on your smaller body.
Following Mingi to the kitchen, you couldn't help but yawn. He grinned and pulled you close. ''Is my baby still a little tired?'' ''Mhm, I just need a sec to wake up, Mango.'' He laughed at the nickname you gave him.
He grabbed the ingredients from the kitchen cabinet as you grabbed the materials. You were busy making the pancake batter as Mingi hugged you from behind, hugging your smaller form. ''Mingi, I can't concentrate like this, can I?''
''How bad do you have to concentrate on pancakes?'' Mingi laughed. You rolled your eyes and grinned. ''Very hard, now shut up,'' you said, hitting him playfully. Mingi watched patiently as you finished mixing the batter. When you were done he took care of baking them in the pan. You prepared the table nicely and waited patiently for him as he baked the pancakes.
When Mingi finished you sat down together, trying them out with various toppings such as cinnamon sugar, strawberries and nutella. He grinned when he saw a bit of nutella stick to the corner of your mouth. The taller leaned over the table to wipe it off. The look in his eyes, full of love, made you feel shy as you took another bite of your pancake.
''Thanks,'' you smiled, ''the pancakes turned out pretty well, by the way!'' Mingi smiled at your praise. ''Turned out as well as we did?'' You laughed at the cringey line. ''Stop, oh my gosh, that was such a bad line!'' ''Deal with it, you fell for me, you chose me,'' he smirked. ''I did choose you. And even at times you are a weirdo and say dumb things, I'll still love you,'' you smiled. Mingi smiled softly at that, heart filling with love.
Who could've known the morning after felt just as magical as the night before?
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desire-mona · 4 months
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dead poets society chars but i assign them random things ive seen happen on the internet / random videos or posts i remember (not based on anything it is genuinely at random):
neil - tony crynight's fnaf animation series which i dont entirely remember the plot of but i'll try to describe. so basically its fake mangle lore to say that mangle is the way they are (all broken and shit) because Mangle kissed Foxy and Chica got jealous so she took a Machete to Mangle to Mangled them. and then the gang tries to save mangle or whatever
todd - fluffle puff, someones pink fluffy mlp oc who was in lesbians with chrysalis (i think thats her name, i never watched mlp). mosy notably known for the animation to pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows. also the creator is a pedophile i think
charlie - sorrow tv and his entire existence. sorrow tv was a youtuber who made videos reading out reddit videos in silly voices. there was a whole posse of youtubers who did this, and he was the most popular just bc his voice acting was rly good. i still watch him every couple months even tho he hasnt posted since 2021.
cameron - does bruno mars is gay? i think about cameron man door hand hook car door every day, so i obviously need to point to my third favourite silly trying to be serious sentence. most ppl know this from game grumps but im not linking a game grumps video on here. rumour come out!
knox - venturiantale, the youtube channel usually consisting of 4? siblings playing gmod together usually. the channel itself was ran by this guy named jordan i think? and his siblings has their own channels. i knew them best for their fnaf gmod videos and their fanmail videos. turns out they were all very christian? and the whole family was abusive and way deep into said christianity if i remember correctly, one of the siblings who left first made a video on it. the venturiantale channel hasnt posted in like 2 yrs and the slow death was kinda sad to see bc he (jordan) blamed it all on The Algorithm.
meeks - that one nagito komaeda kinnie back in Whenever it was cutting off their finger to. i guess prove that they were a nagito kinnie frfr? if u dont know danganronpa lore then nagito gets his hand cut off and replaced with junko enoshima's hand because sheeeee got... executed? i wont lie i dont remember this part of the games story sorry. but essentially that one person was like I Gotta Do That........ anyway im jk the audio was faked and nothing actually happened + the person is fine LAWL
pitts - the key of awesome's parody of tiktok by kesha called glitter puke. theres no lore to this the key of awesome is / was ? a silly little song parody channel. this video was made in 2010 and it kinda shows in some moments but other than that it holds up. just checked and the key of awesome is Not still going, it ended 6 years ago and the last video was actually rly good and genuine
keating - onma island is buried a treasure chest. ok so basically mr beast made a video talking abt a private island and he buried. a treasure chest for a viewer to find. during the video he said "on my island is buried a treasure chest" but it sounded like "onma" which this one youtuber (pinely) found rly funny. it became an inside joke with his friends (one of whom got a tattoo) which then became a lowkey meme. mr beast even tweeted it so. good lord thats a lot of links sorry there isnt a know your meme page or anything
chris - i dont have any links for this one sorry, im just gonna tell the story and u have to believe me when i say i swear it happened (its very a believable fandom story im sure you will). so back when the genshin impact was still in its fairly early days (late 2020-early 2021) the phrase "hear me out" to refer to characters n stuff started becoming popular I THINK at the same time. so people in the genshin fandom were like hear me out with increasingly more heinous shit. started with characters, then npcs, then enemies, then bosses, then weapons, the stamina bar at one point, etc. a lot of these were jokes or straight up bait but back then (maybe now too - i havent been part of the genshin fandom for a LONG time) people took bait far more often than they didnt. so it became a "genshin fandom bad" gotcha to point out That One stamina bar post.
ginny - $300 junko enoshima wig! sorry for double dipping with danganronpa it was just the first fandom i actually started like. on purpose noting fandom happenings with + a lot of shit happens in that fandom. this one cosplayer who at the time was called snowthesaltqueen / badguyincorporated started selling pre-made (and styled) junko enoshima cosplay wigs for $300. which WOULD be fair (i think? idk how cosplay commissions work) if said wig was styled well or quality at all, but what was ACTUALLY provided was a rly basic wig base and few clips with no note or no nothing, and rly flat. like on purpose. like that was "the styling". also you may recognise this cosplayer for 1) getting in trouble when they did a cosplay photoshoot (danganronpa cosplay funnily enough) in a graveyard, posing ON a gravestone. 2) KILLING SOMEONE. they were screwing around with a firearm and fake pointing it at someone and then they accidentally shot them.
i could do this forever like actually. i have SO many internet stories in my brain its actually bad.
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rems-writing · 6 months
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Easter drabble
Pairing: bunny hybrid!Seonghwa × witch afab!reader
Summary: You went back to Wonderland to do your oldest sister a solid. You came back with the cutest bunny ever
Warning(s): Cursing, mentions of being controlled and manipulated, mentions of hunting and killing
Genre: Fluff with a bit of angst. But mainly fluff
Nets: @mirohs-aurora-society
"Why the fuck are we in Wonderland again?" You asked your sister as you walked alongside both her and your other sister. "It's not for me. It's for Zelena. Lately, she's been stressed since she feel she hasn't given little Robin the childhood she deserves even though it isn't true." Regina explained.
You were the youngest of the Mills family. Regina Mills was the middle child, the mayor of Storybrooke and the Good Queen. Zelena Mills was the oldest of the three of you and the Wicked Witch. The Good Witch was already taken so Zelena stuck to her original title despite not being wicked anymore.
"I mean the little girl seems fine to me. She's always smiling and telling me how Zelena is a good mom. So why go through all this trouble?" You asked Regina and the queen shrugged. "I'm not too sure honestly. But hey. She did help us with that one mission so consider this like an IOU or something." You nodded firmly and shrugged off any more questions you had.
As you trekked through the seemingly restored landscape, you tried to lock away the painful memories that pertained to this realm.
There was a reason you ran away from here and became a wanderer.
You zoned out for a few minutes until you heard a twig snap. You immediately stood back-to-back with Regina as you both summoned fireballs in your hands. You were alert and prepared. Something rustled in the tall grass above you and the two of you set your eyes on it.
"I know you don't need the reminder since you grew up here, but be prepared, sis. Just because this realm is ruled by good people now doesn't mean that the dangers here stopped lurking around." Regina advised you and you nodded firmly in agreement. A head popped out of the grass and you were ready to aim
Until you saw two large pink bunny ears poking out of the top of the critter's head. Or should I say
The hybrid's head.
You were no stranger to hybrids, but Regina was. Hence why you stepped in between her and the quivering bunny. His big boba like eyes were shiny and almost brimming with tears. He seemed so lost and you'd punch yourself if you ever saw a tear go down his pretty face.
"Let me handle this."
Regina nodded slowly and diminished her fireball before stepping away a bit upon hearing your voice. You stepped forward and the bunny relaxed a bit yet remained apprehensive at your form.
He knew you. Or knew of you. After all, you still remained the most powerful person in all of Wonderland. His fluffle cowered in fear every time you walked past them. They heard rumors that you changed. They didn't believe it. Or at least half of his fluffle didn't believe it. Three other bunnies believed it. He was the only one that was debating.
Until you reached out and pet his ears, lightly patting down the soft pink fur.
The bunny relaxed under your touch and started thumping his foot a bit. His tail twitched and he visibly relaxed. He cursed himself internally for giving in so easily. Then again, he was a bunny. And perhaps his subconscious wanted to trust you.
"Hey. I'm sorry if we both scared you. We're on a mission right now and we happened to run into you. You know who we are huh?" You saw the bunny nod cutely, finding it endearing as his ears flopped along with his head.
"She's the Good Queen and you're the Demonic Ace."
A weak chuckle escaped at your title and he grew afraid since he thought you were going to smite him for messing up. When you saw the fear in his eyes, you sighed. "I may be the Demonic Ace, but I've turned my life around. Merlin cured me of my self-inflicted curse and our mother is long gone. So it's ok. We're the good guys now."
Regina saw the way you looked heartbroken and her own heart felt pain when your voice wavered as you tried to reassure him that you were a good person. Cora may have turned her life around in the Underworld, but it didn't excuse the pain and torture you went through when you used to live here and make Wonderland a living hell thanks to her. Stepping forward, it was her turn to speak.
"You look like you're on the run from something. May we help?" She asked him gently and he nodded quickly. He pointed behind him and whispered shakily.
"The Queen of Hearts may be gone, but some of her card soldiers still remain since they don't like the new rulers. They went rogue and they're rabid. Like... Lost Boy rabid."
You grimaced and you felt your powers rise to the surface of your palms. However, you remained calm. "Where's the rest of your fluffle? The queen will protect you. Are they hunting you down?" He quickly nodded.
"Our leader was taken by them and they won't stop until they kill all of us. Please help me!" He was crying now and you felt the urge to hug him yet you stood still and just watched him with sad eyes. Then he surged forward and hugged you tightly, which caught you off guard. Nonetheless, you hugged him back and glared at Regina when she sent you a teasing look.
"What's your name and what's your leader's name? We will help you." You asked the pink bunny and tried not to blush when the sweet critter nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck.
"Our leader's name is Hongjoong. My name is Seonghwa."
You smiled at him gently and held his face carefully when the bunny looked at you with shiny eyes. "Well it's nice to meet you, Seonghwa. The queen's name is Regina and I'm Y/N. Now go with her and lead her to where the rest of your fluffle is. I'll track down the card soldiers and rescue your leader. Ok?" The bunny nodded and reluctantly let you go.
"Be careful please."
You cooed softly at the way he was so concerned about you and you patted the top of his head gently. He giggled and you just about combust with cute aggression.
"I will."
With that, you teleported to the deepest parts of Wonderland to rescue this proclaimed leader of the hybrid's fluffle.
---------------------------------------------------
It was a mess.
Well, the rescue went fine. You took down the card soldiers with ease.
It was getting the orange furred bunny back to the location of Seonghwa's fluffle that made it a mess.
Hence, the way that Seonghwa was scolding Hongjoong when you came back with him covered in bites and scratches. Regina was busy telling tales of her adventures to the other bunnies to quell their fears while you were in the corner healing your wounds. After the loudness settled down, you saw a familiar head of pink fur hop over to you and sit in front of you. You smiled weakly upon seeing his pout when he gave you a once-over.
"Joong sends his apologies. He would've done it himself like I advised him to, but he feels embarrassed." He took the rag from you and patted your face gently.
Those card soldiers were a bit strong.
"It's ok. I forgive him. And I don't really blame him for what he did to me. But hey. At least I proved to the rest of your fluffle that I'm trustworthy."
Seonghwa nodded and hugged you again. "Thank you for protecting us." He said softly as he rubbed your back. "It's no problem. All within a day's work I guess." You reassured him. He then looked at you. His eyes were sparkling with wonder.
"Is Storybrooke nice? My fluffle and I heard about that place and we tried to find a way to get there but to no avail." You nodded and he smiled. "Can we go with you and Regina? Please?!" You were about to answer when you saw the others crowd around you with sparkling eyes as well. You saw the approval on Regina's face and nodded when you looked at him once again.
"Yes you can."
---------------------------------------------------
That was months ago. You recalled that day randomly as you sat in your new apartment that overlooked the quaint town of Storybrooke. As you stood there and leaned against the railing of your balcony, you felt a pair of arms wrap around your waist and you saw the familiar mop of pink fur nuzzle your neck and give light kisses.
You fell in love with Seonghwa and he returned your feelings.
"Hey."
He muttered against your skin and you greeted him back softly.
"Did you finally escape little Robin trying to tug at your ears after screaming over the fact that the Easter bunny does indeed exist in excitement?" You teased him and he blushed in embarrassment.
"Yeah. The rest of the guys are currently hiding right now. Did you seriously have to tell Zelena's kid that there were eight Easter bunnies? I figured this favor we're doing for you was easy but it isn't. And it doesn't help that Wooyoung is being a little shit by helping her, especially with Yeosang."
"Well can you blame her? Orange, pink, blue, purple, yellow, black, and brown are pretty common colors for bunny hybrids. But indigo? That's rare."
As you listed off the fur colors of Hongjoong, your lover, Yunho, San, Mingi, Wooyoung, and Jongho, you can't help but giggle at the thought of poor Yeosang and his uniquely colored indigo fur. Seonghwa simply sighed and held you closer to him.
"Happy Easter, my jack of spades."
"Happy Easter, bun."
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steakout-05 · 3 months
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various sketches and doodles ft. craig <3
i haven't posted any drawings in a while so here are some doodles i've done in my sketchbook from yesterday :D
this one is based off that one tweet that says "some people really need a hug, a forehead kiss and a grilled cheese cut diagonally" and it really reminded me of Salesman Barry for some reason so here he is in a hugged, kissed and grilled-cheese-cut-diagonally-enjoying state :) (also that is a little love-heart shaped kiss mark on his forehead but it looks odd because of the angle i was drawing at lol. i should fix it maybe)
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i did a couple of doodles of my hc Craig design too and updated his hair a bit to be more defined and less messy :D it kinds looks like some vaguely apple-shaped hairstyle now which i find oddly appealing. someone in the HB discord said that one of the scientists in the new 4th of July JJ2 art looked like Craig wearing a hawaiian shirt so behold.... a man
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i should make an actual ref sheet for Craig some time, i need to fully solidify his design so i can draw him consistently lmao. he's fun to draw :)
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ahh Dook Larue my beloved <3 he's one of my favourite RAE characters, he's so silly and his voice is absolutely beautiful!! he has an april in his melt :) (also yes that is an Antioch doodle up in the corner) (i should post that later)
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convict this man he's DRUNK!!! i have not drawn Peppino in quite a while that my entire way of drawing him changed completely holy moly. this is a reference to that one Neil Cicierega shitpost song from Mouth Dreams called "Aammoorree" and it is literally one of the funniest fucking things i have heard. it's like Everywhere At the End Of Time except you're a horribly drunk italian. bells
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(this is just how he lives day to day honestly)
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here's a character i haven't drawn in literal years before now! good ol Dan Mandel from Dan Vs. :D i've always known about this show in passing for years from watching those old Fluffle Puff animations, but i never really properly got into it until it suddenly got a resurgence in popularity around 2021, and i, to this day, still think it is so funny how this show managed to air alongside My Little Pony and Littlest Pet Shop. this man almost said whore out loud in one of the episodes and it got through the censors. not even kidding it's from the wedding episode it's so funny. he's such a grimy little man <3
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also bonus Peppina doodle. she is so silly
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simplifiedemotions · 2 years
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For @sumbul 🐰
It would be fine, Draco told himself as he exited the lifts to the DMLE. He looked around, breathing a sigh of relief at the relative din of the early morning.
He was doing office work today, and could hide the offending thing currently perched on his open hand. If someone came into his office, he would simply shove it into his desk drawer to hide it from view.
As if the small white rabbit currently nestled in Draco’s hand could read his thoughts, it gave him a look of abject betrayal, eyes wide and pleading. He scowled at it, but conceded a brief pet of its floppy ears.
“Alright, Malfoy?” asked Dresilda, one of the senior Aurors who seemed to have a knack for catching Draco unawares (see: that time Draco came out of the supply closet with a mortified Granger hiding behind his robes.)
Dresilda had given them a wicked grin before sauntering away, leaving Draco at the hands of a very angry witch.
Draco jumped, though he felt no relief when he saw she was alone. He was sure word of his new pet would reach the Auror bullpen before lunch, thanks to the ever-loose tongue of his superior.
“Did you stop by the Magical Creature department on your way here?” she asked, her shoulders shaking suspiciously, lips pursing in a tight line before she finally let out a cackling laugh.
He scowled at her, then turned on his heel to take the long route. When he made a sharp turn towards the archive wing, he bumped right into Granger.
With the same force she came at everything, Granger barrelled right into Draco’s chest, causing him to almost lose his hold on the fluff ball.
To stemmy both their falls (he was grateful for all his etiquette lessons as a boy), he caught hold of Granger’s waist before she tipped back and fell, still holding the rabbit in his other hand and lifting it in the air if it were a prized snitch.
“Steady on,” he said, privately delighting in the way her soft curves felt beneath his hand.
“Hello to you, too,” she said jovially, looking up at him with a small smile, before turning her gaze skywards, eyes widening.
“Malfoy,” she said, bafflement written in the furrow between her eyebrows. “Are you aware that you’re holding a bunny rabbit?”
The bunny in question raised its chin, staring at Granger as if considering if the fluffy-haired witch was an ally or an enemy.
Draco’s mouth twitched upwards.
“I am.” He sighed, resigned to the fact that he wouldn’t make it to his office as fast as he would’ve liked. “Teddy decided that it was a good idea for me to chaperone his bunny rabbit while he was forced to go to the doctor. Evidently, there is a no-pet rule.”
She let out a light laugh, then set a hand on his arm. There was an odd, fluttery sensation in his stomach at the touch.
Draco had long decided that Granger had offensive knuckles. She would brush them down his arms, his sides, and, in one particularly offensive moment, down his cheek. Those same knuckles scorched his already heated skin as she turned her hand and brushed his sleeve.
“And you were the only hero available?” she asked teasingly.
He grimaced. “Mother was there too, but she’s allergic to rabbits. The entire time she was there, she was wearing a bubble-head charm.” He chuckled at the memory of his mother, whose stern frown held no weight with the thin film of liquid surrounding her. “We had to raise our voices so she could hear us in her bubble.”
“Your mother is allergic to rabbits?” The idea seemed to bother Granger greatly.
“She is.” He started heading towards his office, ready to say goodbye, but paused when Granger fell in step beside him.
He raised an eyebrow.
“Did you know a gathering of bunnies is called a fluffle?”
“A fluffle?”
“Yes!” She slapped her hands together, her eyes filling with glee. “Actual bunny colonies. I think I’d die if I ever saw one.”
“And this is important information?”
Her cheeks coloured. “Well, no. But the idea that a bunny colony is called a fluffle is spectacularly adorable,” she said primly.
“Flunny, even. Granger—please don’t laugh.”
This did not dissuade her, and she laughed all the way to his office. “Sorry. That was just such a terrible dad joke,” she said, wiping tears from her eyes. She gave him a considering look as she turned fully to face him. “Though I suppose ‌you are a bunny dad now.”
He glared at her, then spelled his office open, cursing inwardly that he held the rabbit with his wand hand. If there was a sudden attack in the Auror Department, he’d go in rabbit-blazing rather than wand-blazing.
He was certain the rabbit just gave him another betrayed look.
When Granger walked in with him, he gave her a confused look. “I didn’t realise this was your office.”
“I’m just glorying in seeing you like this,” she said, smiling wryly. “Your obnoxiously tailored robes and coiffed hair really suit her.”
Draco scoffed, holding the rabbit closer to himself as he made to step towards Granger. “How do you know it’s a she?”
She grinned. “I’m the one who bought her for Teddy. Though I have heard no word on its name.”
Of course Granger would be the one to gift someone something annoyingly adorable. Two words he’d also use to describe her.
“Teddy is a genius five-year-old,” Draco started, unable to contain a smile.
Granger raised an eyebrow.
“He named it The Chosen Bun.”
He had to give Granger credit. She thinned her lips in a straight line—even put her hand over her mouth to stop the torrent of laughter that was clearly trying to make its presence known.
“Does Harry know?” she asked, voice muffled by her palm.
“He was a bit horrified, to my eternal glee,” Draco said, letting out a laugh, then another, until Granger joined him. They laughed for a solid minute, until Draco’s stomach hurt, and Granger had to wipe tears from her eyes.
“Oh god,” she said. “Nothing will top this for me today. I can’t wait to harass Harry.”
He looked at her smile, at the way it brightened his unlit office, and thought nothing could ever top the image of her.
She seemed to sense the change in the air as well, because she blushed. Her avid gaze and knowing eyes made his heart pound.
“I like it,” she said lightly, laying a hand on his arm. His blood roared in his veins, “You look… attractive with a small animal.”
Draco blinked, feeling as if he’d combust on the spot.
She gave him another smile, before reaching up and kissing him on the cheek. “I have to go,” she said softly, right at the scene of the crime in which her knuckles had first caused destruction.
Granger was trying to kill him with that smile, that mouth. It was a sort of lazy larceny she’d honed to precision.
Soft knuckles brushed down his arm again (beautiful thief, he wanted to say), before she gave the rabbit a gentle pat on the head. It seemed to have made up its mind about Granger, because it leaned into her touch.
After Granger left, Draco sat at his desk, considering the floppy-eared menace, which was now sniffing the air and tentatively moving its front legs on the hard mahogany desk.
“Don’t suppose you’re part of some rabbit colony?”
The rabbit’s floppy ears twitched once, and then it rolled onto its side and promptly fell asleep on Draco’s palm.
“I suppose not,” he said with a roll of his eyes. And smiled.
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kasey-writes-stuff · 9 months
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questionie numbie four
> askie gamie
I would say 10 for both like genuinely
Like I’m not really sure how good I would be at tickling someone IRL and I would 9/10 do it to provoke if I did it but still when people enjoy being tickled I’m more than happy to do it in RP when I can and so the same goes for IRL if I ever have that chance I’d love to!
I do have a few specific people who immediately come to mind to tickle :3 (no specific order) @ticklishsquish @softleesam @twordish-k @snugglyfluffle @joker-anon @mushiewrites @the-shy-ler
I also have a few who immediately come to mind to be tworded by 🙈🫣 (once again no specific order)
Those being… Squish, Sam, Joker, Fluffle, Shy and um wellll someone else but I am way too embarrassed to tag him tho I’m sure K and Sam will instantly know who it is and they are allowed to tag him or just say his name-
Thank you!
I rambled wayyy too much oops
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inafieldofdaisies · 1 year
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WIP Whenever | Tagged by @vampireninjabunnies-blog <3 | Tagging @direwombat @socially-awkward-skeleton @strangefable @shegetsburned @euryalex @poisonedtruth @fourlittleseedlings @nightbloodraelle @aceghosts @madparadoxum @g0dspeeed & anyone that would like to share something <3
Another more chill snippet from Chapter 7 featuring the good times before THE TALK.
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It was finally 7 am when after taking a deep breath and mentally preparing herself, Sabrina headed downstairs. John was still sleeping as she made him a coffee, placing the cup on the table next to the couch. She returned to the kitchen, pulling out ingredients as quietly as she could, set on preparing Savannah's favorite things for breakfast. One last meal before normalcy would fly out of the window for her sister. She was making a mixture for pancakes from scratch, her eyes glued to the bright day outside, when she heard John approach, the sound of his bare feet against the hardwood floor nearing her. "Morning again, Deputy." "Morning.", she muttered back, focused on the task at hand, refusing to look at him. He was next to her then, holding his coffee cup as he stole one of the strawberries she had set for cutting on the counter and popped it into his mouth. "What are you making?" "Pancakes, eggs, french toast with honey and cream-" "Anything for me?" She rolled her eyes, "Yes, the strawberry you just ate."
"Deputy.", his tone was playful. "You don't like it, you're welcome to prepare something yourself…" "I can't cook." "No?" John shook his head, mumbling, "Last time didn't go well.", while he washed his hands. "I'm sensing a story there." He chuckled, "We all have our secrets." Then he shocked her by picking up a knife and starting the chop up the fruit in front of him, "I know I'm not as charming as your usual tiny helper, but I can still be of service." His eyes were gleaming at the mention of Savannah. "I will take it." They worked almost in silence with John only stopping to ask what he has to do next. Her sister breezed into the kitchen, dropping her old teddybear into one of the chairs, her hair was a mess of auburn curls. Sabrina was flipping a pancake when she came and hugged her waist, whispering, "Good morning.", in her sleepiness she hadn't noticed John and when she did, she climbed on the counter, sitting next to him as he washed the dishes, "You're still here, John." "I promise I'm not stealing your role, Chef." Savannah giggled, "Shows have guest Chefs, you know. You can be one." "I fear we'd starve then, Savi." "Sav, why don't you set the table, I'm almost finished with breakfast." Once she had done it, she settled into her usual spot, rubbing her eyes as she hugged Mr. Fluffles. It was the name of her beloved plushie from when she was a baby. "Rin-Rin, I had a nightmare." "You want to talk about it, pumpkin?" Savannah nodded, "It felt super real, you weren't here and the Peggies came and they tried to take me away, I dropped Mr. Fluffles.", she paused, catching her breath, the memory no doubt still fresh on her mind. She turned to John, her face brightening, "But then, then you appeared and saved me. I saw your plane too." A moment passed as he watched on intently before he took a seat across her, saying, "They won't show up when I'm around, Savi." The breakfast passed uneventfully, a conversation flowing freely, with Savannah making them laugh any chance she got. For a while Sabrina could pretend it was just a regular morning, that a friendly face had stopped by for a visit, the same way Hartley would drop by for breakfast after a night of partying and the last few days were just a bad dream, and she was finally awake. Yet it wasn't Cal that was sitting next to her but John Seed, nothing about the situation was usual and the nightmare was reality.
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