#detriment but really he is not making a decision he’s just going for it and rationalizing it later

[poprockspillage]

running in circles about ocelot today

[ellouchi]

Yet again I see people mischaracterizing Jimmy as some jerk who lashes out on people for no reason and berates them for anything minor like where did you get this from did you actually read any dialogues in the game????????

Jimmy really only threw one shade at Daisuke, he didn't think he was spoilt rich kid he just said he was covered by his parents because he had support system unlike all of them grown up adults. Most of times Jimmy just awkwardly slid off silly things Daisuke said, like the ladies comment or when they were mixing the drink. Daisuke actually trusted and listened to Jimmy throughout the game (to his own detriment unfortunately). Jimmy sent him to the vent because he was the captain and he wasn't going to do the dirty job obviously and if the Swansea somehow woke up Jimmy could shift the blame like he had already got away with. Even when eventually things went to shits we don't see him blaming Daisuke because Jimmy recognised that it was his decision to send him there. Jimmy didn't want to fatally injure him, he tried to "fix it later" which didn't help at all and Jimmy felt guilty about it.

Jimmy treated Anya dog shit half the time it's true but not to the extent some people make it to be. He loves control, he has said so to Curly's face, to ours and that's why he made sure to put her down and belittle her. That's why he (potentially repeatedly) sexually assaulted Anya — because rape is form of power play, he didn't even want her sexually. Initially, Jimmy didn't hate Anya, he just didn't like her and the feeling was mutual. He continued to do bare minimum for her, like when checking up on the crew. If I had to guess how Jim viewed her by the end, then he most likely found her inferior, incompetent, always putting work on his shoulders (or responsibilities he didn't want (pregnancy)), together with being paranoid of her having the potential to ruin his life. That's why he got so pissed off when he saw her crying to Swansea, very likely having already told another person of what he has done. (I'm 100% sure he holds the grudge for telling Curly, who then rushed to "fix things", making Curly seem like a responsible captain which Jim hated.)

Jimmy never made any attempts at understanding or sympathising with Swansea. He knew him longer than Daisuke yet the latter understood him better. Jimmy probably thought that Swansea was an old grumpy man who hated everyone and everything. As the game went on Jimmy just considered Swansea to be nothing but a selfish drunkard (due to immediately assuming he was hoarding cryopod to himself). After the vent incident who Jim blames for the absence of medicine? If Swansea wasn't so stubborn (for like, few times) Jimmy wouldn't have need to spend prescious recourses on him. He could have saved Daisuke instead and fix his fuck up but Swansea ruined it twice. Swan doing arguably the right thing by putting out Daisuke out of his misery only solidified his role as a villain and a threat in Jimmy's eyes, that's why probably as a revenge (for not giving him enough time to think) he went for the gun instead of cryopod like Swansea allowed him to.

And finally Curly. Honestly this deserves a separate book on it's own at this point. It's almost 3 a.m. here so I'll only mention some stuff. Jim aggressively lashes out twice on-screen, first time because he literally lost his dream job, listened to Curly "bitching about having said dream job" and couldn't come face to the fact that Curly was "abandoning him while also looking unscratched from the fall of the ladder" while Jimmy will return to his struggle of life (he didn't even know about the pregnancy yet...). Second time was when Anya endangered Jim's new status as a captain and like I mentioned reminded him that she could fuck up his life even more. Feeling like he was losing control, Jimmy beat up poor Curly who was stripped out of said control by non other than Jimmy. Finally, he was violent off screen by destroying Polle, out of frustration, irritation from the thing, and/or hatred and resentment for the company (que "Pony express is dead" line). In one instance he says "He's mocking us" which confirms that it's about Jimmy's ego.

In conclusion STOP MAKING MY SHITTY CHARACTER SHITTY IN THE WRONG WAYS. This isn't even a full blown analysis of Jimmy's character but accumulation of posts I read and conclusions I came with.

Focus on his already preexisting shitty qualities stop making up new ones ffs signing out.

[ofbreathandflame-archive]

Wait actually, I lied, here’s another thought:

I think it’s interesting that Rhysand never does these personalized selfless things, similar to how we see with Tamlin. There are so many moments that we witness take initiatives of kindness divorced from how he feels romantically for Feyre, or even his own family. When he goes to bury the Fae, he actually doesn’t want Feyre to come along. And she doesn’t. It’s a moment of just pure kindness that begs nothing in return. Even though Tamlin views Feyre’s family as lacking, he still chooses to return there entire wealth, even before he’d even actually fallen in love for Feyre. He didn’t actually expect anything from her. When she doesn’t say ‘I love you,’ he lets her go, even a detriment to himself and even his court. He doesn’t prioritize his own happiness over hers, weirdly (and ironically enough, considering maf). Even the act of falling for her, he doesn’t rush, so much so that Feyre never really actually notices the direness of his situation.

It’s so weird how much he allows her to discover for herself. So much of their love-story is Feyre observing Tamlin - partially because Feyre’s first introduction is Tamlin, so it makes sense her observations are more poignant. This sounds so pro-Feylin, but like I just noticed that we rarely get moments like that with Feyre and Rhys that aren’t already pre-perceived for us. Tamlin, although he’s supposed to, doesn’t initially want anything to do with Feyre - he’s feelings are developed overtime. This comes at a change from Rhys who, the entire time we know him, seems to already have feelings for her. Feyre never has to *do* anything to have his affection. So much of Feyre’s narration in MaF is just what Rhys said a few chapters ago; she’s never coming to her own conclusions.

In comparison, every Rhys seemingly does always seems to benefit him to some extent. Or to impress Feyre. There are never these moments where Rhys earnestly grapples with people outside his immediate circle. There’s such an isolated mess about his character. I’ve never been able to put my finger on it but this seems like what I’ve been thinking. Tamlin often does things out of kindness that come to his detriment. He saves Feyre when he didn’t have to, he saves Rhys when he doesn’t have to; and these decisions don’t…benefit him. He does it because he has a journey and realizes this is the right thing to do. It’s so weird how’s he unintentionally an actual nuanced character simply because…he faces consequences

[causenessus]

love notes

part 0.05. intros.

EXHIBIT ONE: COFFEE ENTHUSIASTS

l/n y/n °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

college student majoring in photography <3 also works at onigiri miya on the side but spends a lot of her time doing client portraits and taking photos in her free time to add to her portfolio and get experience. really enjoys taking photos of street art, including graffiti and interactive pieces because she thinks they have so much meaning and significance. wanders around with suna a lot as they look for more art. went to itachiyama and knows sakusa the best but they both became good friends with inarizaki because atsumu would always bring osamu and suna with him to visit them in high school. y/n would sneak glances at suna when she thought he wasn’t looking but was always too nervous to say anything. in college, they grew closer and things became more comfortable as their friend groups hanged out more. she's allowed suna on her private account because it's where she posts most of her thoughts since her main account has to be dedicate to photography.

akaashi keiji & sakusa kiyoomi °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

akaashi

double majoring in literature and photography <3 whenever their classes assign group projects, akaashi, y/n, and kenma usually all work together. even on individual assignments, they usually go out together to keep each other company while they find their focuses <3 but he’s really going thru it, spends a lot of his time and money in coffee shops (and takes advantage of getting free food at onigiri miya). doesn’t have a very big booking schedule for client photography because he’s so busy but he’s always booked because people are obsessed with how good his eyes and skills at editing photos are. met and got to know y/n at the high school games between fukurodani and itachiyama when she would come to take photos of the volleyball team for publicity.

omi

wing spiker for the msby college volleyball team and majoring in athletic training. frequents onigiri miya but will only eat what y/n or osamu makes. he definitely grew close to y/n and trusts her because she’s just as much of a clean freak as him. their first interaction went something along the lines of her watching someone on the vball team trip on her equipment bag and her coming up to sakusa saying “your teammate just touched my bag with his dirty sweaty shoe and now i have to sanitize it. please tell them to stay away from my stuff.” and he was immediately sold. sometimes feels like the caretaker of his group, making sure everyone’s taking care of themselves because akaashi and y/n often get in the habit of partnering together to make bad decisions or locking themselves in a room to cram for classes

miya osamu & kozume kenma °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

osamu

went on a whim and started onigiri miya while also going to school for a degree in hospitality. works most nights with yn allowing them to grow pretty close. in high school, she also felt the most comfortable with him out of all the inarizaki boys and he would tell her all kinds of stories about suna because he could see how she looked at him. they still usually gossip while they work together and he definitely enables her whenever she feels like doing something (as long as it’s not harmful to herself or detrimental to her future!!!). whenever msby travels to away games, he usually gets the chance to set up a stand outside the court and will leave yn in charge of the tokyo location. is also close besties with akaashi because they share an immense love for food and has given him a free pass to eat there whenever he wants (atsumu on the other hand pays and sometimes gets a discount, usually only if yn is the one taking his order bc she feels bad for him)

kenma

photography major and part time streamer. literally is the only reason yn and akaashi have good cameras because he’ll give them his old ones whenever he buys a new one or will buy them equipment they need as a present. (in return) yn and akaashi definitely help him in general classes. feeds and has basically adopted a cat that somehow climbs their window sill everyday. he’s like the keeper of his dorm because he’s always home so whenever someone is out and has forgotten something, they’ll always spam kenma asking him to “pretty please” bring it to them. posts a lot of the photos he takes on his main twitter account. definitely takes a lot of street photography and spends more time editing photos that people send in but sometimes does portraits if requested.

extras <3

yn, akaashi, sakusa, and kenma all live together

osamu doesn’t pay rent but he’s often over bc he doesn’t want to be amidst the chaos of his actual roomates

kenma’s been forced to keep his depression clutter limited to his room because sakusa and y/n are both clean freaks

(sometimes if he lets her, y/n will come in to help him organize and clean his room)

sakusa often ends up cooking for everyone to eat because he knows no one will eat if they have to make something themselves

his one rule is you cannot be in the kitchen as the same time as him or he will stare you down

y/n usually just makes something for herself at onigiri miya but she’ll always take sakusa’s cooking over it

do not come at me abt how the real world works with businesses please 😭 let me be

taglist: @wyrcan @oyasumeii @froyaoya @gyuijns @nbcvs (form to be added to taglist! <3)

m.list | next

[fiddleyoumust]

I really thought Your Sky was going to be a sweet, silly little show. Honestly, I never expect much in the plot department when it comes to Domundi shows. They know how to cook in the chemistry department, and they lean heavily into how fire their pairings are to carry bad scripts. It's FINE. I'm always going to watch their stuff because FIRE CHEMISTRY.

So, color me surprised that Your Sky is actually saying something to me. I'm not even sure if it's intentional, but this show has really shone a light on the way women are often backed into corners via the pressure society places on us to be kind and considerate, often to the detriment of our autonomy.

And the most brilliant part is they're using a man to show this. It's only episode 4, and we've gotten so many examples of behavior that women can deeply relate to.

- being placed in a situation where your options are to publicly embarrass, humiliate, or hurt someone OR agree to something you don't want to do

The lesson being, you should NOT have an audience for confessions, proposals, or asking someone out. It doesn't have anything to do with anyone else. Leave other people out of it. Teerak has had this happen twice now - with Oh's friends around to pile on in his pursuit of Teerak and with his ex-girlfriend's birthday confession. It was nice to see the ex acknowledge that she was actually the cause of that outcome by putting Rak in an uncomfortable position.

- having your own autonomy and desires mean nothing to a man pursuing you until you involve another man.

Teerak's physical cues should have been enough to tell Oh that he's making Teerak uncomfortable, but Oh doesn't see Teerak as a person. He's a possession, and possessions don't have autonomy. They have owners. And that's why he's suddenly in vengeful pursuit. He was never going to take no for an answer, but now that Fah showed up, the thing he wants has an owner, and it's not him. He can't stand it. How many women do you know who wear a fake engagement ring or use the "i have a boyfriend " excuse to get out of unwanted pursuits? Men don't respect women because to a lot of them, women are possessions. They respect women's owners. 🙂

Fah, on the other hand, is the standard. When he put Teerak in an uncomfortable position by saying he was his boyfriend, he apologized and then asked Rak how he wanted to move forward. He let Rak take the lead and does his best to give him the space to make comfortable decisions for himself. He LISTENS. He sees Teerak as a person and treats him with all the respect Teerak deserves.

I don't know! I'm just loving this little show. It's sweet and heartwarming, but it's also got some things to SAY.

[bliss-in-the-void]

I am a SatoSugu blog but I need to have an ItaFushi moment.

Listen. Personally I’m not the type to ship something if it doesn’t have canon moments that could support it, I just have trouble believing that it would be realistic, and for a while (in the first season) that was me with ItaFushi. I didn’t mind it, but I was like “eh, it could be a platonic only thing for sure”. But now. Nah. Just. Hear me out.

Megumi always says to Yuuji before they separate, “I’ll kill you if you die.”

Which they both know, we all know, that’s a very empty threat. But the weight of it is so, so heavy when you consider Megumi’s personal motivations and core values as a person. He reveres people who he believes are good down to their pure essence. He even told Todo that a person like that is his type. The second he met Yuuji, he knew Yuuji was exactly that. So, realistically, Yuuji is canonically Megumi’s type. But that’s beside the main point I want to make.

My main point is: Megumi specifically told Gojo that he wanted Yuuji’s life to be spared, knowing how detrimental his existence as Sukuna’s vessel was to the world.

“Personal feelings?” Asked Gojo. He knew immediately. He raised Megumi. When do you think Megumi has ever asked him for anything? Yuuji was instantly that important to Megumi. He just saw Yuuji’s pureness and felt the need to protect it despite otherwise being discerning and rational—he made the very emotional, very irrational decision to go out of his way and have Gojo keep Yuuji alive.

So when he says, “I’ll kill you if you die.” when he really just wants Yuuji to live more than anything else, he’s saying to Yuuji in his own angsty-bury-my-feelings-behind-harsh-words-way: “I cannot handle the thought of your death.”

Megumi, who is rational by nature.

Megumi, who knows Yuuji is a dead man walking already.

Megumi, who wants Yuuji to live anyways, despite knowing that.

Megumi, who loves Yuuji so deeply it scares him to admit it.

[fxrmuladaydreams]

make it work (mv33)

max x reader , george x reader (platonic) , toto x reader (paternal)

summary: you and max try to find a way to make your now very public relationship work

prev part

The following days after the Twitter reveal are spent staying inside Max’s apartment. Neither of you really leaves unless absolutely necessary. There’s a thick tension in the air now as well, as if you’re both walking on broken glass.

When it’s finally time for the next grand prix and your meeting with Toto you and Max discuss how you’re going to enter the paddock. In fear of making things worse you make the decision to not go in together, that way there’s less of a chance you’ll be swarmed by reporters.

You come in with George, who’s quick to put an arm over your shoulders and steer you away from any cameras.

“Netflix would have a field day.” He says under his breath as he pulls you towards the Mercedes building.

George lets you go once you’ve made it inside, looking around at all of the other Mercedes employees. Some of them give you weird looks, like they’re judging you, but most give you sympathetic glances, as if they know how all of this is going to play out.

You watch all of the media panels throughout the day. Whenever asked about your relationship Lewis says he had no idea what was going on, George says it was a surprise to everyone but he wishes the best for all parties involved, and Max snaps that he’s only there to talk about racing, nothing else.

Max meets with you after press is done for the day, the two of you heading into the Mercedes building to speak with Toto.

George exits the office just as you’re about to go in. He gives you a sympathetic smile and squeezes your hand.

You enter the office with Max behind you. Sitting behind the desk is Toto, looking down at some paperwork. Standing next to him is Christian Horner. You’re surprised to see the two of them together and not biting each other’s heads off.

“Sit.” Toto gestures to the two chairs at the opposite side of the desk. He looks up at you as you sit down, and tosses his glasses onto the desk.

You all stare at each other in silence for a moment, as if deciding who should speak first. Toto is the one to break the silence.

“Do the two of you realize what kind of trouble you have caused us?” His asks quietly. His eyes travel back and forth between you and Max. He sighs and leans back in his chair. “I can’t fire George, he’s still got a few years on his contract.” He points at Max. “I can’t fire you, because you’re not my driver.” Then he looks at you. “But Y/n, you are my assistant. You are the person I entrust with handling a lot of work that would be detrimental to the team if a rival were to find out.”

“I swear I haven’t said anything about anything.” You shake your head.

“It’s true.” Max chimes in. “She hasn’t spilled any secrets. It wouldn’t matter anyway though, seeing as I’m driving the better car.”

Christian laughs, only stopping when Toto gives him a stern look.

“The point is the two of you need to sort this out. Tell everyone that this was just a fling and it’s over.” Toto says.

“That’s not happening.” Max crosses his arms over his chest.

Christian sighs. “I told you he was stubborn.”

He looks at Max who just stares back up at him. You’d seen moments between the two of them before. They shared a father-son type of relationship. It was clear that Christian truly cared for Max and only wanted the best for him.

“We’re not breaking up. So find another solution to your problem.” Max looks back at Toto.

Toto glances back at you. “Y/n, I’d like to speak with you alone.”

Christian walks towards the door while Max turns to you.

“I’ll be fine.” You nod, giving him a soft smile.

He stands up, leans down to kiss the top of your head, then follows Christian out.

“That’s quite the headstrong young man.” Toto pulls your attention back to him.

“He cares about the people he loves.”

“And he loves you?” Toto raises a brow.

You feel your face heat up. “I mean, I think so. He’s sweet to me. He takes care of me.”

“And you love him?”

“Yes.” The answer comes out quicker than you expected.

Toto sighs, then stands up and walks to the front of his desk, leaning against it. “I care about you Y/n. You’re the first assistant I’ve had that’s been able to keep up with all the work I’ve piled on them. You get along well with both Lewis and George. You’re a lovely person. But dating Max Verstappen is a line I didn’t think you’d cross.”

You sink down in your seat, just waiting for the final blow.

“I trust that you haven’t given him any information about us. And I believe that you do for some reason truly care about that menace of a boy outside.” He nods towards the door. “So I’m sure that there’s a way we can make sure this works for everyone.”

You sit up straighter as your eyes search Toto’s for any chance that he’s lying.

“Really?”

“You’ll both beed to sign a few NDAs, but I’m sure it will be manageable.” He nods.

Before you can stop yourself, you stand up and wrap your arms around Toto, pulling him into a hug. He slowly pats your shoulders, returning your hug in an awkward way.

“Thank you. Thank you. I promise you won’t regret this.” Your eyes well up with tears.

“We’ll see. Just make sure I don’t see a Red Bull driver wandering around our garage.” He says with a smile.

You nod, then exit Toto’s office. Max leans against the wall next to the door, not having even left the hall. He cups your face with his hands. “You’re crying. What happened?”

“Nothing, they’re good tears.” You grin at him. “You were right. Everything’s okay.”

He smiles. “When have I ever been wrong?” He wraps his arms around your waist.

He leans down to kiss you just as the door to the office swings open.

“No Red Bull drivers allowed in the Mercedes building. Out.” Toto nods down the hall.

Over the next few days lawyers draw up NDAs for both you and Max to sign. He complains about it while you scribble your name on the papers. He signs just under your name though, promising he won’t reveal any secret Red Bull information to you.

It feels like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders after you sign the forms, like you’re no longer buried under this huge secret anymore.

You can walk through the paddock hand in hand now. You can give him a good luck kiss before he has to go to his garage. And you can finally be there to celebrate his wins with him.

The Red Bull photographers snap a photo of the two of you after that race. Max tugs his helmet off his head, then practically runs over to you. You stand with the other Mercedes staff, your white polo clashing with his blue race suit. His hair is pointing in all different directions, and his skin shines with sweat, but the smile on his face is breathtaking. He pulls you into a kiss over the fence. It’s sloppy, and uncoordinated, and the crowd screams their heads off.

Later that night you see a notification from Instagram. It’s a shared post, from both Red Bull and Mercedes.

redbullracing and mercedesamgf1

liked by georgerussell63 and 58,635 others

tagged: maxverstappen1 and yourusername

redbullracing Our favorite couple on the grid 💙❤️ + 🩵🤍

[tainbocuailnge]

we're told and shown very little of what shalem and phantom's bond was and is like, so there's a lot of ways to interpret it. but personally I think it's a bit of a waste to show them straightforwardly getting along when they're both extremely insane in conflicting ways. the only on-screen interaction they have is shalem reprimanding phantom, and then testing him, and phantom's response is that he'll do something really detrimental to himself if shalem asks. so to go with their first impressions as looming ominous guy and modest nervous guy and portray shalem as losing composure & getting all blushy at phantom's advances doesn't feel right to me.

shalem actually presents himself to doctor as the one you go to when /you/ lose composure. his profile is clearly written by the troupe instead of rhodes HR like everyone else, and it tells you "you don't remember meeting, but you trust him and rely on him," like a command for the situation to develop as such, rather than a report of how the situation developed. his colleagues think shalem is weirdly pessimistic sometimes, but he's capable and reliable. his role as "modest and gentle shalem" requires him to be composed. in those new CN lines where doctor hands him an outfit to put on he doesn't sound embarrassed about it either. I don't think flirtatious attention would get him to blush that easily.

all the glimpses of what he's like outside that role show him as pretty decisive. every instance of breaking character is him being more forceful than his image allows. if something needs doing and nobody is doing it shalem will go "this is stupid why are we letting this happen" and step in. when he loses composure in his oprec he tries to :/ through the pain before getting screaming mad. when he's scared he gets mad too. shalem tries very hard to be a meek person and his life would be easier if he actually was, but he's not. he's mentally stronger than a lot of people including himself give him credit for. he just doesn't like when it's quiet.

and phantom clearly trusts shalem enough to completely submit to his judgement. the one interaction they're shown having is phantom saying he'll sing if shalem wants him to. phantom will explicitly do what shalem tells him to even if he thinks its a bad idea.

his codename may be phantom and his cat's name christine, but lucian is the christine in this situation. he's the young actor kidnapped and forced to sing by his shadowy teachers. they're making him play the phantom of the opera but that doesn't mean he actually is the phantom. shalem is far more like the phantom of the opera than lucian. shalem can't exist without the mask that lets him pretend to be a real person or leave the theater that mask was made for. it's just that his mask is also salome, which makes him extra insane (love) because salome was a no-name normal girl used as a tool in political machinations until she got written into a play that reinterpreted her as insane and a willing participant. so shalem's nightmares try to convince him he actually did want that guy's head on a plate.

phantom's second module says he doesn't see any art in killing despite how much the troupe hyped it up to him, but he works as assassin and went back to kill the troupe. shalem does still see the art in it, but he works in logistics and ran away because he didn't want to kill. we know phantom left after he realized his teachers were villains and that he completely trusts shalem's judgement, so while there's no clear proof it's likely that shalem's betrayal is what inspired phantom to leave as well. everyone in the troupe was raised to look up to lucian, and told that they had no worth if they couldn't make it to his level. shalem didn't have what it took to become like lucian, but that's exactly what made phantom want to be more like shalem.

and again, we know very little of what their relationship was like, or is like now. we know phantom completely trusts shalem, but the only opinion shalem expresses about phantom is "we're certainly similar, but I'd like to stay away from all that" and their only interaction is shalem reprimanding and testing phantom. so it's possible that shalem doesn't like phantom at all, and is only saving him because the situation is stupid and someone has to do something. phantom is the only person who could begin to understand shalem, but shalem doesn't like being seen closely because he's scared he has no "self" behind the act, so phantom understanding him might not be a good thing to shalem.

I think that kind of resentment between fellow survivors is really interesting. they both left, but lucian is still the troupe's favourite while shalem is called a cowardly traitor. even if shalem does get along with phantom, that would still be simmering below the surface right? their experiences were similar, but lucian was the standard that the others were held to, and the punishment for not being able to live up to that standard was death. isn't it a sick joke to have to go back to save the man whose mere existence made yours harder?

phantom knows that he was the bait the troupe used to draw in fresh blood, and he feels deeply guilty over it. so I think his willingness to submit to shalem's judgement is also because he knows he's at least partially to blame for what's wrong with shalem. meanwhile shalem's nightmares taunt him by saying the troupe was wrong and he's a great actor, so I think part of him still wants to prove himself as an actor. he wants to escape the audience in his head, but can't fully let go of the promise of getting to be on the stage either. and while phantom is the more outwardly insane one, he's making new friends and picking up new hobbies in his oprec while shalem has to be in the eternal nightmare vortex. even in rhodes island phantom is the one who actually gets what shalem wants.

so you have shalem, who wants a normal life he can't have because he was raised to be an actor-assassin with no self, and phantom, who is willing to do whatever shalem says to make up for being the symbol used to ruin shalem's ability to live normally.

phantom in general tends to punish himself. he refuses both medical treatment and gratitude until folinic corners him and chews him out. he feels guilty over being a dangerous person to associate with, but also over rejecting the help he is offered in spite of this. he's willing to submit to shalem's judgement and accept any punishment from him, but shalem wants to be normal and just helps him because it's the right thing to do and this whole situation is stupid, but that only makes phantom feel even more guilty. that too is unresolved resentment.

there's a tension between them where phantom repeatedly shows a desire to leave his decisions to others, while shalem desperately tries to take his decisions from the hands of others. there's clear incentive for phantom to just hand all his agency over to shalem, especially if we assume that shalem leaving is indeed what inspired phantom to follow, and depending on how you read the scene it's phantom's willingness to do what shalem says rather than his reluctance to sing that confirms to shalem that phantom is back to usual. phantom through this respect for and trust in shalem gives shalem a lot of power over him that shalem doesn't actually want to have, because the only decisions shalem wants to be controlling are his own.

they certainly are similar, but they cannot recognise themselves in that mirror, because the part of them that wants to be like the other is at odds with their actual desires. phantom left the troupe like shalem did, perhaps even to follow shalem's example, but shows no indication of wanting a normal life. shalem is a valued coworker, and phantom is an elusive mystery that schwarz warns you as someone familiar with the underworld to stay away from. he speaks of guilt and punishment and truth, but not of what comes after, and he's largely dependent on miss christine to be his moral compass. he's making friends and getting hobbies only because miss christine pushed him to. phantom values justice, but struggles to make his own judgements, and seems to reason that since he's already a murderer he might as well keep killing.

shalem meanwhile values normalcy, but doesn't seem to care nearly as much about justice. his reasoning for defying the troupe and letting his target go wasn't that it was wrong to kill, but that the situation was ridiculous and there had to be a different way. what shalem's nightmares taunt him with isn't the morality of his actions, the way phantom stumbles over his words to justify himself in his own nightmares, but whether they were really his actions. violence excites shalem in a way it doesn't for phantom, and he has no hesitance about threatening murder to secure his agency.

so phantom values justice, and he values shalem's judgement, but he appears unaware that shalem doesn't actually share those values. a normal life just generally doesn't require or involve murder. so while phantom is frequently punishing himself out of guilt and is implicitly looking to shalem to deliver some of that punishment, shalem doesn't really give a shit, because he doesn't really want to think about let alone reckon with their pasts at all. what shalem reprimands him for is causing trouble for the doctor.

their relationship is, by virtue of both operating through externally imposed personalities, inherently somewhat out of sync. you might even call it somewhat parasocial. I think there's probably a lot of pity involved too, pity for the one made to chase your shadow, and pity for the one who cannot escape that shadow. as fellow survivors they're the only ones who could possibly understand each other, but their values and priorities don't line up, and so neither do their expectations and images of each other.

but crucially, i think if any moves are to be made between them, it has to be shalem who makes those moves. because phantom wants to leave his choices to others while shalem is far more decisive than he appears and in fact much of shalem's character tension is based in being forced to finally step up and do something. phantom has very decisively put the ball in shalem's court by establishing that he'll literally do whatever shalem says. all of which is a very long way to say. i respectfully disagree with some of the fanart ive seen on twitter dot com lately.

[cal-flakes]

╰┈➤ “i’ve got you..”

warnings: mentions of depression, restricted eating, descriptions of drug misuse.

summary: y/n can’t think of any other way to alleviate her pain. (this was a request, but i accidentally posted it instead of saving draft so the ask is gone.)

four days, it had been four days since rafe last heard from her, and he was starting to get anxious. the last time he saw her, she looked as though she wasn’t really there, more of a hollow shell than she’d ever been. he knew why, he knew she was spiralling, but she’d never disappeared on him like this before.

four days was a long time for them to not see each other, let alone not even exchange a phone call. rafe knew she needed some space, he knew she preferred to be left alone when everything came back up, and he was okay with that, as long as he knew she was okay. but this time, he didn’t. he had no clue.

he’d left phone calls, voicemails, texts, but to no avail. sighing, he swept a palm over his face in frustration, making the decision to just go over there.

he knew she’d be in, barry had called him a couple hours earlier to let him know he’d seen her on her way home from her shift at the wreck.

topper had also called him the day prior, having been to the wreck for some lunch with his mother. he took notice of her gaunt face which lacked colour and any sign of emotion. he made sure afterwards to pass this information onto rafe, letting him know she didn’t look good at all.

and it was true, she didn’t. she hadn’t been taking care of herself like usual, y/n couldn’t even remember the last thing she ate. she had no energy to wake up in the mornings, never mind eat and look after herself.

she settled on coffee and energy drinks to keep her going through the day, and then allowing herself to dissociate for hours when she got home.

the last few days y/n had been on autopilot. wake up, go to work, come home, go to sleep…it felt like it would never end. the pain in her chest only grew when she thought about it.

she never thought doing a deep clean of her apartment would be so detrimental. coming across an old photo of her and her late brother as kids certainly wasn’t on her to do list, and have it uproot her life for the next few days wasn’t either.

she missed him dearly, not a day went by when she didn’t think about him, her big brother. and it hurt. it hurt so much to the point she was now trembling, looking at the crumbling pills in her hand.

they were old, but they were the next best thing compared to sweet nothingness. utter bliss, is how her friend had describe them to her when she bought them a few months prior.

her friend was somewhat of an expert when it came to downers, he knew his shit, and she trusted him not to give her anything that was too much or too little.

falling back against the couch, allowing the pills to slip down her throat with a sip of water, she waited patiently for them to kick in as she stared at the television.

rafe on the other hand, was on his way over, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel restlessly. he’d finally given in to his worries, too anxious to keep his promise of space.

he just had a bad feeling. sure, he’d seen her in all sorts of states before, she’d been through a lot, so he was bound to experience the highs and lows. but this, this was different. y/n had never shut him out like this before, and his stomach was doing flips every minute.

the range rover screeched to a half outside of her apartment building, the patter of rain echoing throughout the car as it landed on the roof.

pulling out the key, he twirled the bunch in his hand nervously before getting out to head inside. fortunately, her apartment was only on the second floor, so there wasn’t too many stairs to climb.

all measures of privacy were thrown out the window as he neared her door, pulling the spare key from his pocket.

he took note of the lack of noise in her apartment, hearing nothing but the television on an unusually low volume. it was eerily uncommon for y/n to not have music and the television on, as well as whatever devices she had in use in the kitchen.

his heavy footsteps padded through the hallway into the open living room where she sat, completely unaware of his presence. “y/n?” no response.

rounding the couch, he planted his feet in front of the television, causing her to jump at his sudden appearance. “y/n?” he asked again, his usually confident tone faltering.

“r-rafe…what…here?” she mumbled, her eyes flirting between him and the floor, barely open.

his mouth fell agape as he really took in her appearance. her cheeks were hollow and her eyes were unusually glassy, which was unfortunately familiar to him. he’d seen the same look in others eyes, completely catatonic.

slowly, he moved towards the couch, sitting down beside her to get a better idea of her current state of mind.

her head turned slowly to face him, still slumped against the back of the couch as a weak smile flashed across her lips.

“have you taken something?” he questioned, leaning closer to observe her. her head shook ambiguous, almost not answering his question as she reached a hand out.

looking down at her open palm, his jaw clenched as his eyes met the white residue left on her fingertips. “how many did you take?”

her hand trembled as she signalled a two with her fingers, her eyes now avoiding his.

pulling her in gently, he rested her head against his chest, his other arm reaching over her hips to pull her closer. she sank into his arms as he stroked her hair, pressing the odd kiss to the crown of her head.

“i wish you’d let me help you angel, i’d have been here in a heartbeat if i knew you needed me..” he muttered, his eyes now welling with hot tears.

tilting his head, he lay his cheek on top of her head as she rubbed hers against his chest, a silent nudge that she was listening.

her free hand clasped around his elbow, weakly pulling his hand from her head, his brows furrowing as she did. his confusion subsided as she interlocked her dainty fingers with his.

her eyes remained fixed on the television as they held each other, scared the other night fade away if they let go.

“i’m not going anywhere baby, ever. m’kay? i love you so much..” he whispered, a few stray tears seeping into the roots of her hair.

she nodded slightly against his chest in agreement, letting out a breath as he shuffled on the couch, moving to lie down. pulling her further onto him, she nuzzled into his arm as they lay there together, sharing silent tears.

“i love you y/n, more than you’ll ever know…”

[slytherinshua]

slowly realizing more and more that the sm boycott effort is gonna amount to nothing in the end, and this is not the way we should be going about the riize situation.

i loved seunghan when he was in the group, and i am still an ot7 fan. but at a point, i think we need to think of how much of our time and energy we're willing to spend fighting for something that has such a small chance of actually happening. sm is gonna bounce back from any stock lost from the boycott because they are one of the big 3. they have like 4 of the biggest groups in kpop rn: nct, aespa, red velvet, riize. there's just no way either boycotting riize or boycotting all of sm would actually be detrimental enough to get a member who's been terminated from the group back in.

and while i don't agree with the ot6 fans who are being unreasonable, i think some ot7 fans have been just as bad. this fandom is so toxic and rotten, every day it just seems to get worse. and i don't like the narrative that most ot7 fans were spreading about ot6 kfans-- how they were just mad that seunghan was dating pre debut. that isn't why they were mad, they really didn't care about that. it's the fact that he took pictures of him with his possibly/alleged underage girlfriend (it's honestly bad enough with/without her being possible underage, which i don't have confirmation on) at what looks like a hotel and presumably sent it to his friends in a group chat (which was how it got leaked). that's why they wanted him out of the group.

personally, i don't believe that a member should get kicked out of a group or put on hiatus without a proper reason why. and seunghan's hiatus and termination is really messy. but there are valid reasons why kfans weren't too big on him. the problem is there have been many idols kicked out for things they didn't do, and others who have been caught doing really fucked up and nasty things and rightfully kicked out of the group, but it's hard to know which idols are innocent or not when there's no organization. and when we jump on a narrative train and blow something super big out of proportion, the facts and proper investigation of the situation gets lost in the mess of things.

what should have happened was things being properly investigated back in october 2023 before seunghan was ever put on hiatus, and a decision made from there whether to keep him in the group or kick him out based on that.

instead, we have the other 6 members who clearly want seunghan back tired of the state of everything (rightfully so), ot7 and ot6 fans fighting a full blown war every day without logical thinking, and misinformation being spread left and right. there's no organization, there's no firm confirmation on anything, all of this is just such a big mess.

now let me be clear IF it's true that there was anything suspicious going on between seunghan and his girlfriend, then i would obviously no longer support him. as it is, i'm not going to stop supporting him until there's firm evidence. i'm tired of kpop stans making rash decisions based on half truths instead of just being patient and waiting for the facts to come out. staying neutral during unclear situations is a valid stance to take. please let's all stop jumping to conclusions from both sides.

[bucksboobs]

I love your post ab bucktommy having a hurdle in their relationship that isn’t necessarily the end, ik sm antis want them to breakup but like come on, this is Evan Buckley, when does he ever give up easily for something he cares about? This is the man that got back w/was hooking up w Taylor Kelly how many times 😭 (my queen love her tho) and like he waited months for Abby. Ppl hate Tommy but it would honestly bc so ooc for Buck to just drop him like nothing when he’s clearly so smitten

One of Buck’s defining features is his willingness to fight for his relationships and that has been a part of him since season 2. Now in some ways this has been detrimental to him, holding on to Abby for too long, apartment trapping Taylor as a guilt response to kissing Lucy. His off screen breakup with Natalia was, according to Tim, a breaking of his cycle of holding onto relationships past their due date, so I think if he and Tommy get into it, there has to be a marked change in how he responds to conflict in a relationship to really sell that he’s “gotten off the hamster wheel” and they way they do that is by having him be ready to let go, but asking Tommy to stay and try again because that’s what he wants. Abby make the decision to leave kind of unilaterally, Buck having Taylor move in was mostly his decision, for Buck and Tommy to last, they have to make the mutual decision to stay together. And I think that the “moving moment” Oliver has hinted at in 806 will be just that: they decide together that they want to keep going.

[mr-damian-s-power]

Why is Eda such a bad teacher?

How does it benefit the show for her to be bad at teaching? Well, I DO know why, because it desperately needed idiotic teen drama. But, for things that happen later on, I think Eda being a bad teacher is detrimental to the 'found family' aspect of the show.

Now, what makes her a bad mentor ? She's extremely lazy and often seems reluctant to teach Luz anything about magic. Most of the time, Luz either has to bribe Eda, blackmail her, or just go off and do something herself. Sure, the 'reluctant mentor' is a common trope, but they normally change in the story. I don't think Eda stops being a lazy teacher. I don't really blame Luz for wanting to go to Hexside considering Eda is gonna be so stubborn about teaching.

Here's the thing, I think that Eda eventually calling Luz and Co. her 'kids' feels unearned. Normally, I love these types of things! Someone calling a person they're not related to their family. But in Eda's case, she hasn't really earned that. Her unwillingness to teach Luz kinda drove her away, and now she's at the school Eda badmouths.

Secondly, there's the weird decision to have Eda open a school in the epilogue. Why? Why would she do that? She could barely teach ONE kid! Once again, it feels unearned. This is added onto my issue with the fact that it feels like the only reason Eda is a Wild Witch is so she can be lazy and doesn't have to get a proper job. She doesn't show much interest in magic or what she could do with it since she's not tied down by Coven rules, at least as far as I could see.

Here's my solution to this, and a little something extra:

-

In this hypothetical rewrite, Eda is very passionate about learning multiple types of magic, and so becomes a Wild Witch because she refused to simply pick one. One day, Luz shows up and begs to be her apprentice. Eda is still her grumpy and snarky self, so says no at first. Luz shows that she's not going to take no for an answer and is adamant she wants to learn magic. Eda chooses to humour her, reasoning the Human will give up in a few day's time.

But, a few days pass, and Luz is no less enthusiastic about learning magic than she was on day one. She's not just a kid way in over her head, she's genuinely determined to learn magic. Here's where we see that Eda is a very good teacher. She's more than willing to teach an eager young mind about magic, even if that kid can't naturally do magic. She'll still pass all of her knowledge onto Luz and teach her in areas that she can learn, such as potions.

Here's where another idea comes in. Owl House loves to think that it's very clever with 'subverting fantasy tropes', so here's one they should have done; Hexside is boring! The magical school is basic, rudimentary, formulaic and by-the-numbers. Eda badmouthing it makes more sense this time around, as it has an environment that restricts free thinking and creativity. Luz, in her naivete, is ecstatic about the chance to go there.

"Hexside? Pfft! Why would you wanna go to stuffy old Hexside? They don't teach ya THIS at that gilded prison!"

"It's a magic school, Eda! Think of all the things I could learn! Maybe they'll have a way Humans can do real magic!"

"Kid, Hexside is where creativity goes to die!"

"Come on, it can't be THAT bad!"

"Hmph, you think? Alright then, go there for one day and come back to me to see how it was!"

The next day, Luz sneaks into Hexside to see what it's like. There, she is bored to tears! The whole day is just reading through old textbooks, with little to no actual magic performing. When she asks about more exciting methods, her ideas are laughed at. While there, she can meet friends in Willow and Gus, who are just as sad in being restricted in their magic abilities. They want to expand their knowledge, but the curriculum just won't allow it. Later that day, Luz walks back to the Owl House with her head low.

"So, how was Hexside?" Eda asks smugly, to which Luz just sighs and sits down beside her, resting her chin on her hands. Eda's smile slowly vanishes as she realises that the events of today have very clearly upset the Human. "Not everything it was cracked up to be?" She asks, taking on a more sympathetic tone.

Luz tells how it was so boring and uneventful. Nothing like what she'd read a magic school could be like. Eda's only response is to shrug and say, "That's Hexside! The joy graveyard! Just stick by me, kid, I'll get you through this!" In this story, Eda is the 'fun teacher', who's exciting lessons contrast with the mundanity of Hexside.

The next time she has a lesson, Luz invites her new friends. Once again, Eda isn't sure about them, until they too prove that they truly do wish to learn more. This should have been Eda's character! She takes learning magic very seriously and won't stand for people who aren't 100% onboard.

As they have more lessons and the kids bond with their teacher, Eda's heart is melted by her new students and their antics. They bring her out of her shell, to the point where she stops referring to them as simply 'kids' and starts calling them 'my kids'. Their found family is far more organic!

Then, since Eda is so invested in educating young minds to her best abilities, this makes it all the more satisfying and earned when she opens a school once Belos has been defeated. She showed an interest in teaching, and got her dream job!

-

Thoughts?

[five-and-dimes]

Dimes/Cheshyr Dreamling Week Masterpost

Oh hi. Didn't see ya there. In honor of Dreamling Week 2024 I am finally compiling my Dreamling fics (which is... all my Sandman fics lol) into a nice convenient masterpost.

Enjoy my excessive hurt/comfort shenanigans:

Your Eyes Slay Me Suddenly (King/Knight AU, 5.8k words) Hob is a knight for King Morpheus, and while they're clearly into each other, Morpheus has some secrets getting in the way.

Run Away (But We're Running in Circles) (Canon Divergence, 10.8k words) Dream isn't really loved- there are just people in his life who love everyone. Hob and co. work hard to prove him wrong.

Off Book (Human AU, Explicit, 890 words) Dream knows that every interaction has a script, even if the words he's supposed to say aren't really what he wants.

As You Always Were (Human AU, 2k words) Hob is finally coming out to his boyfriend. It goes... different than he expected.

Unsung Lullabies (Canon Divergence, 30.7k words) Hob is tasked with watching Dream after he is turned into a small child. In the process, he learns a lot about the things that shaped his lover into who he is as an adult.

A White Blank Page (Canon Divergence, 4.3k words) Hob lashes out at Dream, but it's hard to apologize when Dream thinks he's done nothing wrong.

Mountain Sounds (Vampire/Werewolf AU, 6.3k words) There are many who think it's wrong for a vampire and a werewolf to be together, and so they try to tear them apart. They go about it the wrong way.

Next to Nothing (Retired Dream, 6k words) Dream thinks his difficulties as a new human are a personal failing. Determined not to burden Hob with his struggles, he ends up hiding things he shouldn't.

Undisclosed Desires (Canon Divergence, Explicit, 4.7k words) Hob learns that Dream has never experienced receiving oral sex. He decides to fix that problem immediately.

100 Years of Drowning (So What's a Few More?) (Canon Divergence, 4.8k words) Dream doesn't think it's necessary for Hob to know the details of his imprisonment, even if it makes some things harder. That's all fine and well until Hob wants to shower together.

Sloom (Canon Divergence, 5.2k words) Hob wants to meet Dream's family, and Dream fears the consequences of Hob learning that the other Endless are so much better than him.

Smile Like You Mean It (Canon Divergence, 4.6k words) Hob is determined to hear Dream laugh, and Dream is determined to hide it.

Endless. Not Everything. (Canon Divergence, 5.3k words) Dream is under the impression that Hob is not attracted to his masculine form, and decides to do something about it, even to his own detriment.

Come Morning Light (Canon Divergence, 6.3k words) In which Dream has nightmares about Hob speaking to him with someone else's voice.

Now I Lay Me (Canon Divergence, 10.5k words) Dream is tired of being a person, and so choses to dissolve into the Dreaming in order to preserve his function while still being gone. Those close to him have a lot to say about that decision.

Body and Soul (Canon Divergence, 3k words) Dream is willing to give Hob anything he wants, but his body is sometimes louder than he is.

Safe in the Palm of Your Hands (Canon Divergence, 2.1k words) During a panic attack, Dream shapeshifts and flees somewhere he feels safe. Coincidentally, there is a mouse in Hob's apartment.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Something I found really neat about Season 3 is that they have the mini arc where Adrien initially trusts Lila to eventually come around, but little by little she starts taking more and more advantage of how lenient he is - and when he notices how detrimental this is to Marinette, he calls Lila out himself. Despite the… writing blunders of Lila’s character, I found it kind of compelling.

Which makes me question why he’s more than happy to tolerate Chloé for almost two whole seasons more than Lila? I always found it odd, even if Chloé’s been his only friend for who knows how long, surely he would’ve noticed a pattern after Miracle Queen went down? I think Season 3 would’ve benefited from fleshing out only one of those stories and leaving the other for later, or cutting one of them entirely - it’s basically the same Adrien arc, with two different bully characters.

Me, I would fix it by having the Queen Bee matter stay in the air for most of Season 3, and Chat Noir specifically lending the bee - so the conflict doesn’t come from “Marinette NEEDS to break up the Adrigami date”, it’s an actual tough decision for him to make, and have him explain the situation to Chloé right in the season finale. Perhaps it’s too much of a shock, or Chat Noir’s too harsh, or Chloé feels lost without Pollen, or everyone else already drifted away from Chloé and she’s clinging to her Queen Bee identity only to have it snatched from her (which also goes with the theme of loss Miracle Queen wants to convey), literally anything that counts as a valid akumatization reason because “waaah Ladybug didn’t pick me” doesn’t do it for me.

Then the Lila thing, I’m still not fully sure, maybe I’d have Marinette be the lenient one that eventually realizes how much Lila’s affecting Adrien, and somehow puts a stop to it - maybe Lila’s being sympathetic to Marinette, and only really wants to use Adrien to her advantage, so Marinette lets Gabriel know after uncovering some particularly nasty stuff, and he cuts her out. Now Lila has a better (IMO) reason to start a rivalry with Marinette, Marinette can grow closer to the Agrestes even if just a little, Adrien has a good point of reference to realize Chloé’s being out of line (without writing the same arc for the same character twice), and you don’t have an explicit Lila & Gabriel alliance (which is great, because I always disliked that part of the plot - unnecessary extra complexity that only really takes away from every character involved IMO).

How would you model the two arcs?

My stance has pretty much always been that Chloe should have been Adrien's problem. Why make Marinette try to fix her bully when Adrien is right there with none of that baggage? I'm still baffled that they made Adrien and Chloe friends because that plot point went nowhere so why make it a thing? You don't introduce a juicy tidbit like "the female lead's bully is the male lead's only childhood friend" unless you're going to do something big with it!

There's a lot of ways you could take Adrien and Chloe, but no matter which path you pick, it should be used to set Adrien up to be more mentally ready to accept all the messed up elements of his home life when he finally grasps that he's a victim on multiple levels. It's much easier for him to learn those lessons of when to forgive and when to give second chances from a peer and not his parent who still has full power over him. I like this leading to a "redeemed" Chloe because I think you need an example of when to give a second chance to make the example of when to not give a second chance really pop, but that's just my preference. Chloe teaching Adrien how to set boundaries and cut someone off so that he can do that again on a much larger scale is also perfectly valid.

I think the Lila thing should have been used to develop Alya and Nino, not Marinette and Adrien. The show writes all the teen characters as pretty terrible at navigating or even identifying things like abuse. We see that in their constant love of confronting Gabriel, never once stopping to think, "Huh, will this actually be a good thing for Adrien or are we putting him in danger?"

You could include Marinette in this arc, too, but I think that she should take a backseat and let Alya and Nino take the lead since they're the ones who see Lila as a good person. Learning to be a little less trusting and a little more thoughtful is a good lesson for the way both of them have been characterized. Alya needs to learn to be a little less willing to trust sources and season-four-and-five Nino needs to learn to be a little more focused on the feelings of those around him over his own goals. Plus Marinette already has so much going on! The writers really need to let others have the spotlight for a bit so the poor girl can rest and stop looking terrible as the plot twists itself into a pretzel to always make her the one who needs to learn a lesson.

[youhideastar]

WujiWatch: CQL Rewatch Episode 25

Something that I’d suspected on previous rewatches really became inescapable on this one: when Wei Wuxian leaves Baifeng Mountain, even before he meets Wen Qing, he has already made the decision to leave Yunmeng Jiang Sect.

He’s been staying for three reasons—for his brother, for his sister, and for the sect—and in this episode, each leg of the tripod is knocked out. “Staying for Jiang Cheng” was already tenuous from the previous episode: Wei Wuxian knows that he’s a constant disappointment to Jiang Cheng and doing a shit job as Jiang Cheng’s second-in-command. But Wei Wuxian goes into this episode believing that, by virtue of his power/skill, he’s still a huge asset to the sect, and that, as a brother, he has to stay for Jiang Yanli. By the end of the episode, he will come to believe the opposite: that both the sect and his sister are better off without him.

When it comes to Yunmeng Jiang Sect, Wei Wuxian learns in this episode (from Jin Zixuan) that people are saying the Yin Tiger Seal somehow harmed the cultivators who were there when he used it at Nightless City and so Wei Wuxian (and thus Yunmeng Jiang) owe them compensation. Wei Wuxian’s greatest strength is thus instantly transformed into a liability for his sect. The same thing happens, symbolically, at the crowd hunt, where Wei Wuxian uses his incredible power to draw 30% of the prey into Yunmeng Jiang’s nets—and instead of being impressed by Yunmeng Jiang’s strength, people say it’s cheating and reflects poorly on the sect, ultimately forcing Jiang Yanli to apologize on Wei Wuxian’s behalf, which Wei Wuxian clearly finds almost unendurable.

Speaking of which, when it comes to Jiang Yanli, as a fandom we tend to focus on her absolute ethering of Jin Zixun and how badass it is—which is fair! But that’s clearly not Wei Wuxian’s takeaway from that interaction. He looks extremely upset the whole time she’s defending him—I think in part because he hates the idea that she has to defend him. As far as he’s concerned, it’s his job to defend her, and this confrontation means he’s failed.

Then, when the dust has mostly settled on the Jin Zixun thing, two last straws: first, Jin Zixuan confesses his feelings for Jiang Yanli, meaning that she is now pretty much certain to marry him; and second, Jin-furen tells Jiang Yanli that she shouldn’t be alone with Wei Wuxian anymore because it will spark rumors that the two of them are sexually involved. The first honestly might have been enough on its own to make Wei Wuxian believe that he’s just dragging Jiang Yanli down – he tried over and over to protect her from Jin Zixuan, and now it’s clear all that effort was futile at best, and actively detrimental to her hopes at worst. (He could have figured this out a while ago, obviously! Jiang Cheng did! But here we are.)

But that second piece is really the nail in the coffin. Wei Wuxian may not like Jin-furen, but he has to recognize that she genuinely cares for Jiang Yanli and has her best interests at heart. When she says to Jiang Yanli, “Stay away from Wei Wuxian or your reputation will be ruined”—especially in a feudal setting where a woman’s reputation for sexual purity is everything—he has to take that seriously. And he does. Not instantly; he still grabs Jiang Yanli’s wrist and tries to pull her away again. But when she resists, he stops in his tracks. And that’s when it’s over.

That’s when he bows to Jin-furen and says, “Then I have to ask you to take care of Jiang Yanli for me”—confiding his sister to her care going forward. That’s when he tells Jiang Cheng, with a strange gentleness, “I might not be able to be there with you”—supposedly about the Flower Banquet, but it’s clear he’s not talking about just that. That’s when he gives Lan Wangji a “Farewell, Lan Zhan” that sounds way too final for someone who’s just heading out to walk around town. I don’t think Wei Wuxian necessarily has a plan for what he’s going to do next, as he walks off of Baifeng Mountain and through the Lanling streets. But I think he’s already made up his mind that he won’t be going back to Lotus Pier.

[silverflameataraxia]

Part of me is worried that SJM will just sweep the Ember bonus chapter under the rug, but since we know Nesta's story isn't over yet, another part of me feels like she might use the bonus chapter as a catalyst for Nesta's story arc in the next book, as well as some character development for members of the IC like Cassian and Azriel.

The bonus chapter focused on three main issues: 1) The IC's treatment of Nesta, 2) Nesta's emotional state, and 3) Nessian post-ACOSF.

1. In regards to the IC's treatment of Nesta, the bonus chapter really made it obvious that the IC only reacted the way they did because it was Nesta who gave Bryce the Mask. If anyone else had done it, the IC wouldn't have reacted the way they did. We've seen various members of the IC make incredibly risky decisions, but yet none of them have been ripped to shreds or threatened with punishment or possible execution by their family. Even when they have disagreements, we can always see the love and admiration that they have for each other. None of that is visible here. Their treatment of Nesta was out of pure hatred, with no love of admiration to be found, not even from Cassian (her mate) or Azriel (her friend and brother).

2. Nesta's emotional state is not usually commented on because her emotions are usually hidden beneath her cold mask, her wall of steel. But Ember notes a lot of Nesta's emotions and none of them are good. Nesta's nearly vacant face; her carefully blank face; her thin, brittle voice; the bruised look in her eyes; the pain and guilt in her face, the wave of raw emotion that she was holding in. The only times Nesta had any positive emotions were when Ember was sticking up for her: Nesta showed surprise, gratitude, and longing. I feel like SJM really honed in on Nesta's emotional state in this bonus chapter because it's going to be used to fuel her story arc next book. All signs seem to point toward her being Starborn, and as much as I don't know what that journey will entail, I do feel like Nesta will go off on her own. Both to protect those she loves (Cassian was almost killed by Lanthys, Azriel could have been killed by the Middengard Wyrm, and Gwyn and Emerie almost died in the Blood Rite), but also because maybe she feels like she failed Cassian and Az, or that maybe she feels like Cass doesn't love her anymore, or that nothing she ever does is good enough and that she's not worthy of him. Even though she just defeated the Asteri, ended the enslavement of Midgard, ended the threat to Prythian and all other worlds, I really feel like Nesta is going to feel like she failed or that she's not worthy of the Dread Trove because of the IC.

3. Nessian clearly didn't get their HEA at the end of ACOSF. Cassian is not looking too great in the bonus chapter, and Nessian is clearly not in a good place. Cassian doing nothing to stick up for his mate or protect her is not a good look. He clearly doesn't have much faith in Nesta and Bryce defeating the Asteri, which means he doesn't have much faith in his mate. When Rhysand threatens to punish Nesta, Cassian doesn't do anything. He doesn't even snarl, "Over my dead fucking body!" When the most powerful High Lord in Prythian history turns his full fury on Nesta, Cassian merely steps an inch closer to her. He doesn't get in between them, he doesn't do anything to protect his mate. SJM chose to have Ember highlight Cassian being conflicted and torn over who to side with, while in the book itself she had Bryce mention that like any good mate, Cassian would rip her to shreds if she made one wrong move with Nesta. To me, this is highlighting once again how Cassian will protect Nesta from anyone and anything except Rhysand, which I think will set the stage for Cassian character development/redemption arc. One of the biggest issues with Cassian is his complete devotion to Rhysand (even to Nesta's detriment). He feels guilty for "failing" Rhysand and wants to spend the rest of his life making it up to him and proving his worth, but as we see perfectly laid out in the bonus chapter, this is causing Cassian to fail his mate in every way that truly matters. Since next book is Az's (although, I'm sure we'll get some Nesta POV's), I can see both of them working through this guilt together. Az may feel like he failed Rhysand, but he doesn't worship the very ground he walks on, nor does he make Rhysand's happiness his main goal in life like Cass does. And since Az wants a mate so badly, I don't think he'll take too kindly to Cassian potentially losing his mate because of his sheer devotion to Rhysand. I think Az will be able to get through to Cass, and spur his redemption arc by helping him come to terms with his guilt over "failing" Rhysand so he can be fully devoted to Nesta before he loses her for good.