#definitely started rambling at the end there

[reverieblondie]

Bad Dream

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Nightmares, Mysterious passes, Breaking and entering, Panic attack, Breaking washers, Bucky touches your underwear (whoops...)

Summary: You and Bucky are not only neighbors but friends for months now. You two are close... but are still finding out new things about each other...

Word Count: 2,613

A/N: This was inspired by an amazing request got from an anon. I loved the idea so much that I can see this being turned into a full series if enough people like it! Just let me know! I look forward to feedback like always! and request are always open!

"So... What am I eating?"  

Bucky says almost suspiciously as he looks at the macaroni noodle on his fork.

"I can not believe you are so picky," you say, rolling your eyes before taking a delightful bite of the casserole dish you made. Once swallowed, you point your fork accusingly toward Bucky. "It's called tuna mac. It's cheap to make but delicious. Now you can either eat it, or I will stop being such a friendly neighbor and stop sharing my dinners with you."

Bucky chuckles before giving you his signature smirk, "If that's the case, don't come knocking on my door when something of yours breaks again." 

You huff, he doesn't play fair. 

He watches as you pout and sigh before he takes the macaroni and tuna mix into his mouth. When he eats it, his eyes bulge slightly. "That's actually really good?"

"See, you just need to trust me, neighbor. It's something my mom used to make. Boil noodles, mix up the sauce, and top with cheese. It tastes better than it sounds." 

Bucky smiles as you ramble on. When you look over at him, he looks back to his plate, mixing it around as he makes a face before eating more. "That's true. This is way better than that chicken we had last Thursday."  

"Hey! We agreed to forget that monstrosity!"

Of course, Bucky laughs at your dramatics, and you can't help but echo it back. Thursday night dinners have become your favorite tradition since moving in; no matter how shitty your week could have been, this always lifts up your spirits, even just a little bit. Most people in your building seem to avoid Bucky; they won't join him in the elevator or even greet him in the mailboxes. They judge his past... but who are you to judge? Though getting to know him didn't happen instantly, it happened because of an accident you might have caused…

You have been fighting with these washers and dryers since you moved in. And now here you are fighting again with the washer. The stupid thing won't spin, and it's starting to flood with water. You paused the cycle and knew that you should just ask the maintenance guy for help, but that has the risk of being blamed for it being broken.

Distracted, you don't notice someone walking in to use the other machines. Honestly, it's surprising someone else is up this late just to do their laundry. So much for not running into anyone while you're dressed in your lazy day pajamas—no bra just to add to the pending embarrassment… Trying your best to keep your head down and fix the machine as silently as possible, you didn't realize that your rattling around has definitely drawn attention. 

Until a shadow is cast over you. Turning slightly, you look up at the imposing figure and see your next-door neighbor. James Barnes... Ex Winter soldier and a current Avenger... 

His head tilts as he stares down at you, "Problem?" 

This is the first time you have really seen him up close… he's much taller than you thought, and his eyes are the clearest shade of blue… While you're silently coking, Bucky shifts on his feet, his scowl deepening as he continues to stare. Mentally, you chastise yourself for being rude and pull your hand from the filled drum to offer him a handshake, stumbling out your name in the process. This was a mistake, however, because you ended up splashing the super soldier with washer water… -Shit… 

"I'm sorry, and yeah, I'm just trying to get this washer to work… they never want to act right… old machines acting wonky, what's new?" You huff a laugh, but Bucky keeps looking at you unamused… ah yes… he's an old machine, you idiot… 

You quickly take another step closer in panic mode, "Oh! But not all old machines! My grandma had a vacuum for like 20 years, and it never crapped out on her!" -what are you even saying? 

Buck just further scoles you, keeping his eyes locked on yours. Honestly, it's a bit intimidating—his intense stare locked onto you. Then there's the fact that his glare doesn't roam—it's just set on your eyes. Plus, you're just rambling on, and he's just watching you like you have lost your mind! You can't afford to move again… 

"Why don't you just call for maintenance?" he says in a confused tone, his brows knitting together.  

You give him a gentle smile, "I don't want to be blamed for breaking it…" 

He doesn't seem too impressed with your excuse as he rolls his eyes, but to your surprise, instead of walking away, leaving you to struggle, he places his laundry down and begins to investigate the machine. 

You step closer to him, "So you're going to help me?" you chirp.

"I'm going to try, but if it breaks further, that's on you…" -Okay can't really blame him for that..

"Fair enough, neighbor." he only seems to hum at that before continuing his investigation. 

He does his diligence checking everything out; while he does that, you're doing your own checking out. It's not like you're trying to be a perv.... but curiosity always gets the cat in the end, so you allow yourself to check him out a little. His back faces you, and it's incredible how sturdy it appears; you can even see how the muscles ripple with every move despite it being hidden underneath his t-shirt. Then his narrow waist that draws your attention down the length of him, and his arms bulging with every move as it roots around on the inside of the drum. The dark metal arm is so eye-catching you can't help but stare even though you know you shouldn't... If you were caught, you would be modified by how rude it would be. But you can't help yourself from admiring how pretty it truly is… and the craftsmanship is impeccable… 

"I think something is just caught if I can unwrap it…" With another pull and a slight groan, he rips out what was caught. Surprisingly, it's Small... red and- 

Bucky holds up the dripping wet material, and now that he has it unscrambled, you are mortified... Of course, out of everything to get tangled up and caught, it had to be your thong. Turning it about, Bucky looks at the material confused, unsure, until he meets your mortified eyes and flushed face. It must suddenly click for the man that he's holding a stranger's underwear because, with the inhuman speed, he's met with realization and he's practically throwing your underwear at you like it would bite him. 

The flush of his neck and the way he suddenly does not meet your eyes tells you he's thoroughly embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, ma'am…" Ma'am? Wow, now he's talking to you properly; he really is embarrassed...

It's quiet for a moment as Bucky awkwardly shifts on his feet. Then you can't help yourself any longer, and you laugh. You laugh so hard you all but fall over yourself, and to your shock, Bucky breaks from his mortification and joins in on your laughter.

The moment lasted for a while until you were both on the verge of tears. As you wipe away your tears, you catch him smiling, and it's like looking at a completely different guy. If people saw this, they wouldn't be avoiding him, that's for sure. 

With the washer fixed, you could finish your laundry cycle as Bucky moved to start his. As you're turning to thank your helpful neighbor, he is gone? Scanning the room, you see him leaving, shit! 

"James!" You shout without thinking. He pauses before turning back with a small smirk. 

"Don't tell me you broke something else." 

He's… teasing you? A grin spreads to your face, "I wanted to thank you for helping me out." 

He shrugged, "It's no problem. But call me Bucky; when you say James, it makes me feel old." With that, he walked off. 

Days later, you were still troubled by the feeling you didn't get to properly thank your neighbor for saving your panties from doom. So you did the only thing you could think of. Making him food. Make sure debts and gratitude are always paid... it's something you picked up from both your parents, but where your dad made sure to do it with favors and money, your mom would always pay by making desserts and meals. So, in your situation, you decided on a platter of brownies.

The look on his face when you knocked on his door was priceless. Of course, he accepted, and thus, the cycle between you two started. You would have a favor, Bucky would help, and then you would make him a meal or dessert. Over time, Bucky's grumpiness was replaced with friendliness, and your friendship got stronger. Even though you had fewer favors, you two continued the tradition of eating a home-cooked meal together once a week until suddenly, it was odd if you were not seeing him.

Like now...

It's been three weeks since you last saw him. It's honestly so lonely in the building without him around. Sure, he's not talkative all the time, and there are still things you know you two have not shared, but it's undeniable this closeness you feel to him.

You just hope you get to see him soon, or you will be forced to break something and force him to come back…

It's another quiet night. It should be a night that you rest easy, drifting far off into dreamland. But you just can't seem to fall asleep. Perhaps it's the fault of a certain super soldier's absence. As you lay pondering whether you should just force yourself to rest or get up and do something until you're tired…

Then, loud bangs from the neighboring wall interrupted the stillness. On instinct, you freeze and try to listen to where the crashing is coming from. 

Bucky's place... but that's odd; he's not home. Or did you just miss him? Another crash makes you second guess that it could be a break in… 

But who would be dumb enough to break into a super soldier's apartment?

Apparently, you are...

It is technically breaking and entering, but is it bad if you do it for a good reason? What if someone is wreaking his place? What if he's in danger? What will you do if you actually run into someone? You will deal with that once you encounter it…

You ignore that for now as you concentrate on picking the lock... You hated it then, but you're now thankful for the skill at times like this. It clicks with a few more twists, and you're now sneaking through the threshold.

It's the same place you have been in multiple times, but tonight, you see the crumble of blankets on the living room floor, the flipped furniture, the mess of wreckage. Then you see the more heart-aching sight in the room's darkness. 

Bucky usually stands tall and has that sly smirk for you with some greeting. Now, he is crouched so small, disheveled, and trembling. Those ocean-blue eyes clenched tightly...

A step towards him immediately has him on the defense, ready to pounce.

But he pauses at the sight of you, confused, rightly so. But you're more distracted by how the outside lights reflect on the streams down his cheeks.

You're about to say something, but his hoarse voice cuts you off before you can, "Get out!".

You should really listen, but as he sinks back to the floor, your feet feel like lead. With a swallow and a steadying breath, you step closer. He should understand by now that you're not one for listening. 

Closer now, you can take in his sweat-drenched body and matted hair and how he tries to stop shaking... Thousands of questions flock to you; you just swallow them down. Slowly, you sit close enough to be noticed but not enough to touch him…

Settled beside him, you hold your hand towards him on the floor, making a silent offer. "I'll stay for as long as it takes..." 

It could take minutes or hours. There is also the chance of him lashing out, but you will just be silent and patient and let him feel your presence and hear your calm breaths.

You're there for a couple of minutes until a clammy warmth touches your hand. Looking down, you can tell the shaking has stopped a little. You spread your fingers and let him lace them with his own. 

"I... don't know what to say..." he mumbles, but you shake your head before meeting his eyes.

"You don't have to explain... We all have scars... Bad dreams. "

"Every night I have bad dreams... Sometimes, I just randomly shake awake."

"Other times, you just lay there waiting for the sun to rise."

The look he gives you tells you he's shared the experience. You shrug and look out the window, "Like I said... bad dreams."

As you two sit there, his shaking slowly stills, but your hand's grip only tightens. 

"I'm sorry..." It was such a silent whisper that you almost didn't hear it. Bucky, tired, and a wreck, brought back memories you thought were packed away. 

"Don't be sorry. Let's just work on getting you cleaned up. Are you good enough to rinse off?"

Bucky nods before standing up... He walks towards his bathroom but pauses just short... He has his own set of questions he wants to ask... One of them is clear to you... are you going to stay... 

"I'll clean for a bit and will brew some tea for, when you get out. Okay?" 

He gives a short nod before disappearing. You start placing what you can remember being placed before. It takes you a minute to get everything back in its place. Sure, this place was a mess, but you have had to fix the fallout of worse. Once done, you move on to the kitchen to brew the tea. As the water heats, you just listen to the muffled sound of the shower. Does this happen often? And if so, how have you never noticed before?

Bucky takes longer to wash off than you expected, but ultimately, it's a good thing he took the time for himself. When he finally comes out of the bathroom, he's only in pajama bottoms, a towel resting on his shoulder, and fixing his metal arm back into place. His hair is still dripping wet when he finally plops down on the couch. For a long moment, he's still thinking of what to say, but you just slide the peppermint tea over to him.

Bucky gives a small thank you before he lifts the cup, letting the smell waft to his nose and the cup warm his hand. When he finally takes a sip, you feel like you can breathe again. While he works on his tea, you notice the drops falling from his hair and landing on his skin, causing him to shiver. He didn't even bother to dry his hair, huh? Carefully, you take the towel from his shoulder and softly start to dry his wet hair away. Bucky looks at you curiously as you focus on the task before you. 

"Why are you so good at this?" 

"Like I said, everyone gets bad dreams. Some worse than others." 

He hums before slightly chuckling, "Is that also why you know how to break into apartments?"

The playful tone in his voice makes your heart squeeze, and you can't help but grin, "You're not the only one with secrets, soldier boy." 

[cryptids]

..

I just need to ramble for a minute, but I'm always internally grieving how the majority of constructiprowl fics (which is already not many 😭💔) really only seem to use the dynamic from the early stages of their relationship where Prowl was still pushing the constructicons away and resented them. And on the one hand, I understand the appeal bc an antagonistic relationship is fun to explore, and I love fics where they start off that way and then develop a better relationship out of it.... but, I also come across a lot of fics where he hates them way more and for MUCH longer than he ever did in canon, or where that's the only dynamic they'll ever have. There's a sentiment, I think, that it would be impossible for him to ever warm up to them and continuing to hate them is the only realistic option.

And that's alright if it's your preference, like far be it from me to get in the way of people's toxic yaoi hdbsbds, but they DID move past that in canon and it feels like a shame that's not really acknowledged as much. Mostly bc I wish there was more stuff that explored the dynamic they had later on once he decided he wanted to be in control of Devastator and was keeping them around willingly..... idk just that specific period of time in their relationship was so funny and endearing to me djsbhs, I need more of him being their boss and bringing them everywhere with him to everyone else's dismay lmao

They still had a lot of issues at that point, Prowl was power tripping like crazy and injuring himself by pushing an unstable gestalt bond too much/too fast, with the nosebleeds and the Scrapper moments, so they still had a long way to go. But what I'm getting at is mostly just that by then he was long past hating them or trying to make them go away, and was actually trying to keep them around and make things work. In the end he was only forcibly separated from them against his will too.... the worst thing Starscream ever did fr nsnbndnsms

((There is a lot about Prowl's combiner wars storyline that I don't love actually, but I'm putting that all aside for now 😪))

I think he was essentially neutral on the constructicons as individuals... he was mostly just treating them like all the subordinates he'd had before, as pawns in his schemes. THEIR devotion and adoration of him was definitely very different to anything he'd experienced before (and extremely gay lmao), but canon didn't really give him the time to notice or react to that.

Just going off on a little side tangent but actually (as a shipper lmao 🤧) I like to think he could have become fond of them over time. Actually I think Prowl and the constructicons have a lot more in common than was ever really explored? Especially if they had been allowed to have distinct personalities and demonstrate their intelligence a bit more lmao. Like they're always himbos (affectionate) to me, and I don't mind the way they spoke or anything, but I feel like they were just really underutilised in IDW1... like we never saw any fun science stuff from Mixmaster or any of Hook's medical skills for example. And speaking of Hook in particular, I think it's interesting he usually has a bad temper and a very kind of perfectionist, prickly and stubborn personality that makes him very Prowl-like in a way that would have been fun to play around with...

Anyway I guess this whole ramble was just to say I wish there was more happy/endgame constructiprowl content bc it could be so good and I'm yearning for it jsjsjds 😭😭

I have also seen a few people say this ship is inherently one-sided and depicting it any other way is ooc, and I disagree!! I think it CAN be, but it doesn't NEED to be in order to be true to canon.

Just adding a couple of relevant panels here too,,

[the-eclipse-is-in-me]

OMG

Did I already make a post about passing 20,000 words on IDOV

Cause if I haven't, here it is

I'm so happy, I've been working on this for months and here we are, with still so much story to tell!!!!

Also, I finally made the playlist!!!!

It's actually really nice to listen to, even if I made a few changes (Conan Gray is taking over me.)

Ok, now here are the celebratory chapters for Tumblr 10, 11 and 12

Chapter 10: Treehouse (Cresent’s POV)

Summary:

Cresent gets to talk to Quinn.

Notes:

TWO CHAPTERS, WOAH!!!!!!!!!! They're friends again, WOAH!!!!!!!!! Gracie Abrams inspired 2 chapters, WOAH!!!!!!!!!! Songs for this Chapter are Treehouse and I Love You, I'm Sorry

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

I waited for Quinn to get here, playing with my headband in my hands. Ya, so I sent Will to ask them to meet with me, I couldn’t go myself, couldn’t risk crying in front of the rest of camp. “Ok Cres, you have committed to this, there’s no backing out now.”

I was still playing around with my headband when Quinn arrived. I didn’t notice at first, but then I looked up. There stood my best friend, one of the best things to ever happen to me. Another thing I gave up without thinking. The tears came back, and I ran to hug them.

I was so sorry for everything that happened but I couldn’t put it into words, not anymore. I was just glad to see my friend after so freaking long. Quinn hugged me back and I sobbed. I missed them so much and I didn’t even realize it. We just stood there for a while, and then Quinn pulled away. I just hung my head.

“Cresent, I am so sorry for what happened, I missed you so much.” More tears came down, and Quinn started crying too.

“Quinn, it wasn’t your fault, I was going through stuff, and instead of talking to you or anyone, I blocked you out. I just didn’t want to be left behind again. I didn’t want someone else to just willingly give up on me, so I gave up on everyone else first. I am sorry, it was all my fault.” I was just rambling at this point, but I didn’t care. I was too busy feeling stuff.

“Cres, it wasn’t your fault, you were feeling left out, and I was too busy to notice.”

“It’s just you were always hanging with cabin 9, or surrounded by a bunch of stupid girls…”

“Wait, Cres, were you jealous.” “What in Tartarus made her think that?”

“No, I just missed my best friend, a lot.” “Ok, I was a little jealous too, but she doesn’t have to know that.” I wiped my eyes

“Ok, fine. But even if you did, there would be no reason to.”

“And why’s that.” Quinn looked nervous now.

“Uh, never mind that you hungry? We can talk more with lunch.” Ok, whatever made Quinn nervous can wait, reuniting with your bestie makes you hungry.

“Yup, I’m starving.” Quinn held out her hand and this time I accepted. I wasn’t going to let my fatal flaw get in the way of this.

We went to the dining pavilion and got lunch, it was late afternoon, but we didn’t mind. We just started to catch up. Apparently, Quinn has been at camp for 6 months and didn’t bother to find me. I decided not to point this out, as we had just made up, but it still hurt a bit. Quinn seemed more confident and comfortable in herself than she did a year ago, and I was happy to see that. I was happy we were friends again.

After lunch, we went to spare a bit, since I still needed that training. Quinn got really good at it, but I was always better at archery, which is what we did after. We spent the whole day together, just the two of us, like old times. But this was different, something definitely changed, I just can’t figure out what it was.

We walked to dinner together, sat in our old spots and chatted. We sat together at the campfire, singing dumb songs with the Apollo cabin leading everyone. We made s’mores. Everything was the same, but it wasn’t and I didn’t know if I was ok with it.

We just talked about everything and nothing as we walked back to our cabins. Then we reached the Nike cabin, I said bye, and Quinn gave me one last hug before going inside. I started to walk back to my cabin. My thoughts spiralled “What's different now?” “It’s not Quinn’s gender, there have always been hints of that.” “Is it me that’s changed?” “When did Quinn figure out their gender?”

I finally reached my cabin and flopped onto my bed. I pulled out my art book and started doodling. I didn’t feel inspired but I wanted to draw something. In the end, I may or may not have drawn Quinn. Don’t tell anyone. I was just adding the finishing touches when Nico came in.

“Hey, Moon. What are you drawing?” Nico walked over to see but I instantly hid my book.

“Uh, nothing just a sketch”

“It looked really good from here.”

“Yeah, maybe I’ll show you when I’m done, but not now.”

“Ok, lights out in 15, ok?”

“Got it.”

I finished my drawing and went to bed, I had another amazing day with my BFF to look forward to.

Notes:

I wonder what is so different now that Cresent is so uncomfortable. No seriously, what is it, someone tell me. Hopefully, I figure it out over the weekend.

Chapter 11: Yours (Quinn’s POV)

Summary:

Quinn did something, again, but what does that mean

Notes:

I started writing this last night, and now it's finished, the break is over, yay. Songs are Yours and World's Smallest Violin, don't ask how I got inspo from there

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

It’s been a few weeks, I’ve been hanging with Cres again. I was happy, and having fun with one of my favourite people in the whole world. But there was also this nagging feeling in the back of my head, something telling me that history will repeat itself, cause it always does. I’m not sure if Cres also feels it, but it’s been very off-putting for me.

I think she might have, cause even for 1 year apart, it’s been very awkward, and she is more introverted than before. We talk about stuff but haven’t gone into what happened properly. I want to tell her why I was spending less time with her, why I didn’t want her to know about the quest for a bit. I tried to tell her that I liked her, as more than a friend, more than a best friend even, but how could I even do that, it’s not like she could like me back, and it would make things even more awkward, right? Maybe I should just try to forget about it all together.

Anyways, I was walking to the dining pavilion,(by myself cause Cres chose to do some more training with her new bow, see introverted). And as I am, this girl from the Apollo cabin comes up to me. Well, I think she is from the Apollo cabin, but I’m not sure, I mostly just went by her bow and seemingly sunny glow. I was not really in the mood to talk to any cause I was hungry, and the only person who could tolerate hungry me wasn’t there.

“Hey, you Quinn, right.” She says to me.

“Um… yeah, do you need something.”

“Well”, she starts fidgeting a bit, “I just wanted to, um… omg, this is so embarrassing, I’ll just say it. I wanted to ask you out, for lunch or something maybe. I just think you’re really cute and also really good at sparring.” She started to ramble a bit after that, but I kind of lost focus. She seemed nice, and she did risk rejection to ask me, which is more than I’ve ever done. I thought “Hey, it’s not like my first option would ever choose me, so why not.”

“Sure,” I said, interrupting her still-continuing rant. She looked at me wide-eyed, and then she kissed my cheek.

“Ok, um… see you at lunch tomorrow” And she walked off with a grin on her face.

I looked back from where I had started walking and saw Cresent standing there, her face full of disbelief. She started walking, but not towards me, instead towards the cabins. I had no idea what to do, “Did she see anything?” “How long was she there?” “Should I follow her and make sure she is ok.”

Because I’m an absolute idiot who knows nothing about feelings, I went to my cabin, completely forgetting about lunch, and tried to figure out what to do. The last time something like this happened, she didn’t even acknowledge me for 1 year, and I was really sad during that.

I was still pacing when my sisters came in. “

“Quinn, what are you doing” Laurel speaks up, since I didn’t notice the door open and shut.

“Debating if I just ruined the best friendship I have ever had, for the second time.”

“What did you do this time?” Holly asks next.

“Well, other than saying yes when some girl asked me out “

“What, why, what cabin were they in, what was her name”

“I’m pretty sure they're from the Apollo cabin, and I never got her name.” “Great job Quinn. Someone puts in the effort to ask you out and you don’t even ask their name.”

“What were you thinking, how could you just accept a date with another girl you don’t even know the name of, in front of your best friend.”

“I didn’t know there was an issue with that.”

“What happened to liking Cresent?” Laurel asks me.

“It’s not like she’ll ever like me like that, it’s already a bit awkward, and I can’t risk it being worse.”

“And so you do that?”

“Hey, when did you become such a master at relationships?”

“We’re not talking about that right now, why are you here and not checking in on her?”

“Because I’ll just make it worse.”

“And how did that work out last time? Quinn, just try talking to her, it could help.” Then they both left to let me think.

I thought on this, then thought some more, and some more. 2 hours passed, and I was still thinking. “Maybe talking can help.” “But why would she talk to me again?” “I hurt her, again” I just didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t lose her again.

I finally decided “Hey, worst case scenario, she never wants to see me again, I’ll be ok.”

Notes:

My sweet, sweet child. Quinn, in the words of Holly Victor, what were you thinking? What was Cres doing while this was happening?

Chapter 12: The Exit (Cresent's POV)

Summary:

Realisations hits Cresent smack in the face, but what will she do with it.

Notes:

I haven't updated in like 2 weeks, well here is Cres's reaction, and other stuff. Songs: The Exit and Devil doesn’t Bargain

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

I was done with my extra training, and Quinn had already gone for lunch. I told him I was just going through another round, but I really just wanted to think, and shooting a few arrows always helped.

It’s been about a month since Quinn and I became friends again, and I was happy, but it also felt off, like he was keeping something from me. I know that we just patched things up, and maybe not that well, but I didn’t think that he wouldn’t trust me this much, I thought that we got past that. It’s what started the problem in the first place.

I walked away from the archery range, but then I saw Quinn’s figure standing in front of someone. From where I was standing it looked like a girl. I decided to just spy a little bit from where I was standing. The girl made and excited expression, but I couldn’t see Quinn’s reaction. She reached up and kissed him on the cheek, and a part of me (a huge part of me, mind you) was hurt, cause Quinn didn’t do anything about it. He just looked behind him and saw me.

I felt tears start to take their place in my eyes. I wasn’t sure why, but that single movement made me feel so, betrayed, I guess. I just walked to my cabin, and once again, Quinn didn’t do anything about it. That just hurt me more.

When I got to my cabin, it was thankful, but sadly, empty. Hazel had come to visit, but she was probably hanging out with Frank or one of her other friends. Nico was, as usual, with Will, “Typical, spend all your time with Will, while your sister’s over here, crying and panicking because she just realized that she has feelings for her best-friend, who also just so happens to have someone else.”

Wait, what was that? I CAN’T have feelings for Quinn, at least not those feelings. I’m sad because he’s hanging out with other girls instead of me. “That’s exactly what a jealous girlfriend would say.” No, there are no jealous girlfriends here. Just me. “Exactly, who else would I be talking about?” Ugh, this isn’t helping.

I was still debating with my thoughts when someone knocked on the door, and low and behold, it wasn’t Quinn. It was Hazel.

“Hazel, why did you knock, it is your cabin too, you can just come in.” I say as she comes through the door.

“I had to make sure I wasn’t intruding anything when I came in, you seemed to be in distress.” “How in Tartarus are my siblings so good at reading me?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about, I’m fine.” As you can see, I’m trying my hand at lying to get out of things. I wasn’t in the mood to share what was happening in my social life with another one of my siblings. I walk over to my bed.

“Are you sure, Cresent?”

“Ok, fine, I’m not.” I couldn’t lie to her, like come on its Hazel “Its Quinn.”

“What about them?”

“I found him with… someone, and something happened, and it just disturbed me so much.”

“What exactly happened?”

“Well, I was sort of spying-” Hazel interrupted me

“Cresent, you can’t be spying on your friends.”

“Hazel, please let me finish.”

“Fine, but we’ll discuss that later.”

“Ok, so I was just coming from training when I noticed Quinn talking to this girl. I couldn’t see his face but she looked happy, excited even. I watched them talk a little, then-” I stopped. It was still too fresh, even if it was small. It hurt.

“Then?”

“Then she kissed Quinn. It was just on the cheek, but I just can’t help and think there was something else.” I curled up were I sat, “I mean, I haven’t talked to Quinn in 2 years, then we just became friends again like, a month ago. I don’t know what he was doing during it, maybe he found someone and isn’t telling me. It’s not like he owes it to me.”

“Maybe you should clear it up, remove fact from fiction, and find the truth in this whole thing.”

“But it’s just… weird… awkward, I don’t know.

“I guess liking him isn’t helping, is it?”

“What do you mean ‘liking him’, he’s my friend of course I like him.”

“I mean as more than a friend.” “I’m I that obvious.”

“I can’t like Quinn, at least not l not like that, and definitely not if he is dating someone else.”

“But how can you be so sure, you haven’t even talked to him about it.”

“You know what, I’m going to take a walk, I need to think about this.” I got up and walked to the door, and Hazel just watched as I did, respecting my need for space. I walk straight for my spot in the woods.

I reached a grassy spot, and laid down on the flowers. Thinking about what I saw, this time without the stupid crush talk, because it’s not there. “How can everyone else have something like that?” “Can I have something like that?” “Do I want something like that… with Quinn?” “Where did these feelings even come from, or when?” There were so many questions to ask.

“What was that?” I heard a random sound coming from the trees that surrounded me. I got up, pulled out my headband and turned it to a staff. “Come out, I dare you.”

“Cres, it’s just me.” Quinn came out of the shadows. I broke my stance, but I still didn’t feel like talking right now, especially not to Quinn. I would like to first sort out my thoughts before I talk to them.

“Who was the girl?” I may have asked this in a bit of a harsh tone, but Quinn didn’t seem to notice, instead proceeding to become a blushing mess.

“Would you believe me if I said I don’t know?” “Ok, what? Is this an opportunity? Shut up other thoughts, stay on track”

“So why did she kiss you? Why did you let her kiss you?”

“Well I was caught off guard, she just… kissed me, out of nowhere.”

“Okay, then, why are you here.”

“I saw you before you left, and you didn’t seem ok.”

“Oh, thanks for noticing,” I said sarcastically.

“But seriously, what’s wrong? It wasn’t the kiss was it.”

“Nothing that you could fix.” “Because you're part of the problem.” I laid back down in the grass.

“Well, I would still like to know if it bothered you. I’m your friend, I would like to know these things. Especially if it was something to do with me.” “But this is something you can’t know.” Quinn came and laid down next to me.

“I don’t feel like talking about it right now.” Quinn looked at me worriedly but didn’t push. We fell into a comfortable silence until Quinn spoke again.

“Cres?”

“Yeah?”

“Have you ever liked someone, as more than a friend?”

“I don’t know, and you?”

“Yes, currently actually.” Quinn gave me a look and it made my stomach spin.

“Anyone I know.”

“Yeah, you’re very close to them.” Quinn doesn’t have a crush on one of my siblings does he, cause I’m not close to anyone else.

“Can I have a name?” Quinn thought for a second, then looked at me, then just blushed and stayed silent. I tried to let it go, but I couldn't. And Quinn clearly wasn't planning on elaborating.

“We stayed there until sunset, which is a pretty long time to just be lying there. I got up, and Quinn followed, but no one spoke again. I was thinking of what Quinn said. “Who?” We had to go and get ready to capture the flag, so we each went to our cabins after saying bye, Quinn didn’t drop me off this time.

Notes:

Do I feel bad, yes but not for these reasons, I have no idea how I managed to write this, I barely have time to do anything anymore, and also I'm depressed and just realised like this morning, and broke down. Maybe writing and finishing this story will help, not that it will happen anytime soon.

I decided not to kill u all with with waiting for me to remember to put the next ones on here so I put these 3 enjoy!!!

💜👋🏾✨

[aethersea]

#ooooo now That's a thought #barrayar is already a planet a little hostile to human life (re the plants); suppose there were a handful of terrible monsters as well #so there's a tradition of killing monsters (surefire military promotion if nothing else) but it's not valorized really #there's probably extra pressure to keep the gene pool ''clean'' in this world (in the face of what happens if you don't - monsters) #but the colonists hit a wall at some point during the time of isolation; too many monsters or some new variety that's too hard to kill #so they breed up the first witchers

#time of isolation ends and barrayar thinks it might quietly terminate all its witchers; monsters can be hunted by spaceship now #what need have they of their worst fears bearing silver swords in the dark? and the cetagandans come

#i'm trying to think about how the homegrown witchers interact with the cetagandans and all my brain is giving me is air raid sirens #that's going to be so awful

@thoughtsformtheuniverse oh you and op are both so very onto something here. allow me to ramble a little on your post....

so on the one hand, Barrayar as we know it definitely didn't have the capacity to genetically engineer witchers. on the other hand, they weren't 'Barrayar as we know it' when they first landed, now were they? it seems reasonable to assume those initial settlers did have the equipment and knowledge to do whatever counted as a normal level of science to those first settlers, just maybe not to continue producing & replacing the tools they need to do that. just because you know how to do a little gene-splicing doesn't mean you know how to build a gene-splicer, you know? (taking some inspiration from that book 1632 here)

but they knew that would happen. so they threw everything they had into devising a method that would keep working long after their tools had failed them. and that's how you get the Grasses. no one could devise new Grasses now, not really, but they can keep using the ones they've got, and maybe tinkering with the ingredients a little as they go to see what happens.

and then there's the magic. I don't think you can just drop Chaos magic into the Vorkosigan Saga, I'd say there's quite strictly no room for it, it'd be too much of a disrupting factor in the intergalactic arms race. but we can handwave and say it happens anyway if we want, just only on Barrayar; or we can handwave and say there's something similar that has specifically the effects we need for witchers without having to worry about mages, i.e. it makes impossible monsters. idk maybe Barrayar has weird volcanic vents, or it got the godzilla strain of radiation that turns ants into kikimora, we can make up whatever we want. we can even say Chaos is, like, the Heart Of The Planet somehow and is uniquely found on Barrayar, and it's a form of radiation that got really messed up when the Cetagandans started bombing the place from orbit. anything to make the plot go.

as for the Cetagandans.....oh boy. a witcher alone could take on a whole fleet of Cetagandan bombers, but they cannot be allowed to get even a scrap of his DNA back to Cetaganda. all witchers fighting in that war carry suicide bombs, which burn so hot and fierce as to destroy even bone. for a rebel garrison, getting a witcher assigned to help with your defenses is both blessing and bane, since he'll fight so fiercely that you'll beat back the enemy far more often than not, and with far fewer casualties than usual....until the fight he doesn't think he can survive. at that point, all you can hope is that you're not standing too close.

this assumes, of course, that the Barrayarans realized what Cetaganda could do with a scrap of DNA before Cetaganda realized that witchers weren't just unusually skilled berserkers. I don't remember enough of the books to say how much Barrayar knew about Cetaganda before the invasion, but if they didn't know by then, they weren't about to learn any time soon. whereas Cetaganda will realize eventually that the tales of men as strong as beasts and unkillable as a storm are more than mere battlefield exaggeration.

and then they'll want to capture one alive.

whatever the Chaos is, it's unique to Barrayar. a witcher off of Barrayar is still a witcher, but he grows weaker over time as the Chaos within him is used up and not replenished. eventually he will be nearly an ordinary man. but oh, what an interesting puzzle that near-ordinary man would be to Cetagandan scientists.

all that said, I'd personally want to smash my blorbos together, not just the worlds they're in. let Cordelia subtly champion a cultural shift in how witchers are perceived just as she did with those artificial uterus machines. let Aral and Yennefer have a conversation about power. let Gregor and Ciri meet, and discuss rule. let Miles and Ciri meet and cause chaos together.

and yet...oh, and yet, the destruction of kingdoms, the burning of Ciri's home, the violent instability and painful fear of tomorrow, all of that is so central to that story. and Nilfgaard invading from afar while the northern kingdoms fracture before them does parallel Cetaganda's invasion, in its way. aaargh.

wait wait wait. what about the treason in Cordelia's books. that war, that pretendership, that's a decent parallel, no? and that makes Ciri about Gregor's age. that could work out really nicely, actually. not least because the more I think about Ciri, golden princess of a ravaged kingdom, heir to so many legacies, destined to rise up against all odds and rule....and if we put her on Barrayar, there are no independent kingdoms, but there is an emperor.......

what if they were destined enemies, is what I'm getting at here. what if they're cousins, and his house destroyed hers in that war, and she's the last scion of a royal line that, depending how you read the lineage books, has a much better claim to the throne than Gregor's? and she also has Chaos in her veins, witchers on her side, and oh man we haven't even gotten into how and whether we're adding elves, dwarves, and other non-human races to Barrayar. that prejudice could translate very neatly between canons. oh and we also haven't gotten to the pogroms. "there will never be more witchers" is a pretty big part of the whole Vibe™ I think. so the big question is: did Cetaganda bomb the witcher schools in the invasion, or did the locals do it after the war? or, worse, before, Barryar doesn't just think of quietly terminating their witchers they do it, and then those selfsame witchers have to turn around and decide whether to fight against the invaders or walk into the mountains and let it all fall out as it may.

alright at this point I'm just bouncing haphazardly between ideas, but yeah you get the gist. could be a lot of fun!

/looking at attitudes towards mutations in both verses/

So hey what happens when we combine the Vorkosigan Saga with The Witcher?

[gorbalsvampire]

🔺and 🧐 for sorcha, 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 as a general “elaborate about sorcha and alistair’s family situation” question?

🔺 RED TRIANGLE POINTED UP — does your oc know how to use any weapons?

Sorcha can hurt you with a blade but not really in a combat type situation. She can sort of shoot (if you're raised by Alistair Fucking Dunsirn, you learn how to handle a gun). Her main recourse in combat situations, though, is being fairly nimble and scuttling the hell out of there.

🧐 FACE WITH MONOCLE — is your oc more logical or emotional?

She was more emotional, before her total breakdown at the hands of Draven. The restored Sorcha is cooler-headed, more scheming, but she stays silly - and she is still, physiologically, nineteen, with all the brain worms that implies. Sometimes she wants to be cold and aromantic and dead inside, but then some stupid Malkavian comes along with his big blue eyes and reminds her she's a soppy wee bastard.

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 FAMILY WITH MOTHER, FATHER, SON AND DAUGHTER — how many people are in your oc's immediate family? how many people are in your oc's extended family? do they have aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc? who in their family are they closest with? are they close with their birth family, or do they have a found family?

Sorcha's grandparents - Alistair's parents - both died during the Second World War, and Alistair was effectively raised by his boarding school, passed around cousins and uncles and aunts during the holidays, learning a little about all the family trades. His aunt Elizabeth ran an urban farm up in Bishopbriggs, and was the closest thing he had to a mother figure. He knew Charley Dunsirn back when he was Charlotte Dunsirn, and was around for her Embrace, decades before his - they were probably playmates.

Finlay is Sorcha's cousin from Stirling, relocated to Glasgow when the family needed some fresh boots on the ground. Finlay is Alistair's mini-me, doing the street work that he can't do now that he's legally dead, and they bonded quickly. They weren't so keen on Sorcha at first, but now they've started to see what Sorcha can do and they're learning from each other (trading business knowhow for necromantic theory). Finlay also comes with baggage: Lucas Dunsirn, current spokesman for the board, ghoul to the Ollav Sir Robert Dunsirn and close second place in the run for their Embrace. Finlay knows Lucas is plotting SOMETHING but can't put their finger on what.

Further out, there's the array of more distant relatives in the company. Sorcha is kind of... removed from them, as Alistair's weird kid who got the fast track to the top. They're generally afraid of Alistair, and by extension Finlay; the Ollav may be the head of the family, but Alistair is its iron fist.

Sorcha's mother is in that extended sphere too. Sorcha is still very fond of Isabella, and Alistair is still in love with her, but they don't see her much and she's firmly embedded with her own people, the Venetian Rossellini. The same goes for the swarm of little 'uns Sorcha was raised amongst - they were like siblings and she'd be pleased to see them but she might not even recognise them after eleven years away.

Finally, and this is Sorcha-exclusive, there's the Duskborn to consider. All Duskborn are siblings in their hearts. The Three Graces, the coterie she was trying to get in with at first, didn't really trust her (and she didn't stand a chance, their bond was... not something an outsider could be welcomed into), but that instinct to nest in has found itself flourishing with Beetlejuice and Hazel.

Hazel and Sorcha are the same age in Kindred terms, but Hazel's that bit older and wiser and more pro-active as a person that Sorcha feels like the little sibling there. Maybe half-sibling: their blood is similar-but-different, as half-caff Lasombra and diet Hecata, but like calls to like in the shadows. Beetlejuice, of course, is their much older and loopier stepsister who's seen it all, done it all and survived. It's a found family and a witch-n-bitch coven and a long-distance very casual lesbian thing all at once.

[marigraphia]

I've had this pose ref saved for a while and the Superman set photos just gave off the same energy 👉🏻👈🏻

The reference is this photo of Katharine Hepburn as Antiope and Colin Keith-Johnston as Theseus in the 1932 play 'The Warrior's Husband' (and I'd love for people to turn into a draw your otp meme pls pls pls this pose is so good)

And also, of course, the Superman (2025) set photos

[secondbeatsongs]

going through some old logs, and I need you to understand just how truly unhinged early 2010s RP omegle was.

genuinely you could stay on there for hours with just one person, hashing out complex traumatic backstories, drawn-out love confessions, detailed action scenes...collaboratively describing graphic violence, past abuse, comfort, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, any number of sex acts...and then one of you would be like, "oh haha it's 2AM! I have to sleep :(" and the other person would say, "omg saaaame. :( gnight!!!" and then you'd exit the chat and never speak to each other again, and this was. fine.

you could just spend an entire evening shoving your wretched, bleeding soul into a chat log with someone you'd never meet or learn the name of, achieve some form of emotional catharsis, and then go about your day or night like this was an average way to spend your time.

I'm really normal about this, actually

[piecesofchess]

Tartarus is still a little broken and that's Fun !

[sympathytea]

Chat I have some thoughts about PVPCiv PrinceZam. I know. Typical right? I'll try to make this quick, but you probably know by now if you've seen my posts floating around that I ramble a lot. Spoilers below, for S1 and S2 (specifically S2Ep2.)

So! The prince in yellow has certainly been cooking. And I think safe to say I have...a decent enough vibe for him that I can be confident with this read. Starting from the top:

PrinceZam's cowardice has been obvious since our first introduction to him. Especially since his attempt at killing Evbo (unsuccessfully) and then proceeding to run and lock himself behind his door, where he can't be hurt sets him up for the type of guy that doesn't like to get into fights that he can't win. And runs when they don't go his way.

He displays this cowardice again when in the S1 Finale when he fights Evbo for the armor stand. They fight for a decent amount of time using just wooden swords, but then Zam notices that he's not winning this fight, and throws his trident at Evbo, and flees. Not even going back for his weapon until much later.

We don't see him again until S2Ep2, where he is holding the bird in a cage. His cowardice is still very much there, instead of trying to fight a fight he won't win, he takes someone hostage that Evbo likes to make sure he won't fight back.

Does that sound familiar? Yes!

Winding back a bit, S1Ep4. The big tonal shift episode.

Zam has fabricated a similar situation. Tabi is held hostage, Evbo likes Tabi, and Zam is threatening to kill her if Evbo doesn't comply. And this time he actually has assistance from the PVP Language guy, other iron swords and probably also the shields.

So you might be wondering "Tea is this entire read just to say he's a coward we know this"

Not quite! Theres more, obviously. This onion has some layers.

Zam to me, seems deeply afraid of not just losing a fight, but also death itself. To the point he seems to switch gears to becoming God to prevent the possibility of dying. Despite him not having a whole lot of PvP skills. (He lost to Evbo of all people multiple times. I don't think he has the qualifications to be God let alone take on Tabi and Clown I'm sorry lol.)

His original plan, seemed to just be hiding out on the iron sword layer, preventing both Tabi from getting the eternal sword, but also keeping Evbo there for immortality by durability refreshes. Which we see him using.

But then that plan fails, He dies to Evbo, and just...hides out in Evbo's house for awhile. Planning to take Immortality for himself.

That plan fails, He's scared now, and seems to hide out long enough to retrieve his trident and venture down to the iron sword layer, presumably to gather his henchmen and go down there as a team. Because he couldn't possibly fight Evbo, and the diamond swords by himself.

Slight problem with that.

Evbo and Parrot killed the entire layer while he was gone. Including the people on his side and possibly, some guards that were affiliated with Zam.

He did not know they were going to do this.

And this scares the shit out of him!

Evbo at this point has been not the type to just kill an entire layer out of pure spite and resentment. And so he would reasonably, be pretty shaken up about this.

He confronts Parrot. "I want to know why you're the only one still alive" is about the iron sword layer being empty. He's afraid of what these two can do to him. So he takes a page out of his own book and holds one hostage so the other can't hurt him.

Its also clear to me in his speech that he himself is afraid of death and seems to dislike Evbo's callousness towards it. "You should be thanking me for helping you not take life for granted."

So after he manages to get Evbo and the diamond swords to stand down, his plan becomes "Get the eternal weapons, become God."

This plan, I can assure you is going to completely backfire in his face.

He's overconfident that this will work, He's overconfident in his skills and thinks that he can just put the situation in his favor again, through whatever means necessary.

Tabi and Clown took down an entire civilization by themselves. Which I don't think Zam knows.

And honestly, I don't think there is a universe where Zam could win this fight. Two axes, both of them capable of permanently killing him and are already 3/5ths of the way to becoming gods. He's just too weak for this. He's lost to Evbo, who we've been shown time and time again isn't very good at PVP himself. He is improving, but Zam is lagging behind, and that's not a very good sign for his survival. He's certainly a fun antagonistic foil to Evbo, considering how afraid of dying and losing Zam is, compared to Evbo who seems to not give a shit if he loses as long as he can come back. Who also fights tooth and nail to win, but Evbo does it fairly rather than trying to rely on putting the situation directly in his favor. Evbo is kind to others that he enjoys, Zam seems to keep everyone at arms length, only valuing people who stay in line. Zam has only been shown to die to Evbo, and most likely avoids dying if he was keeping his immortality a secret. Which could be interpreted as him being better at PVP, I don't think he is. He probably just did cheap shots and ambush kills on unsuspecting players when he was on the wooden and stone sword levels. Considering we saw him do an ambush in his first introduction, then hid like a coward when it didn't work? Yeah... I want to see this menace crack like an egg.

[personinthepalace]

The Question in Justice League: Crisis on Infinite Earths - Part 1

(also it seems like Huntress is going to be in this movie as well so hopefully there will be some Huntress and Question interactions!)

[thegreatyin]

this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail

sorry got in character for a second

Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though

congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)

[your-unfriendlyghost]

went to an estate sale today!

Found this broken transistor radio that the lady gave me for a dollar, so I’m gonna tinker ‘round with it lol. Also got a camera to figure out, so that’s gonna be fun!

I guess I needa go to more estate sales, cos it was real fun. There were a bunch of these old auto manuals that tempted me, but I didn’t buy any cos I figured they’re not all that useful to me even if they were cool. Man, I had to bite my tongue to keep from asking the lady running it if she needed a hand with everything- I didn’t know how fun it could be to go through people’s old stuff, but it was so fun, and so much more fun than the store I work at ever has been

I dunno, there’s just something so neat to me about how you can get a feel for what a person was like just through the stuff they owned. I mean, I know material goods ain’t supposed to matter or whatever, but there’s something almost…sacred about seeing someone’s life all strung out like that. Not to get too philosophical or anything lol. I just mean you can like…see the stories there.

The t-ball bats that gave way to baseball bats…the owner probably had a son that was a little leaguer. All the spare auto parts, tools, and model cars…he was a mechanic. The stacks of western movie VHS tapes and leather holsters and toy pistols…he dug cowboys…

I dunno, it’s just really cool to me. I know it doesn’t matter really, but I just…I really love people, y’know? The humanness that gets infused into the objects we leave behind is just…so so important to me.

Oh man sorry about getting all sentimental lol. I just watched my first David Lynch movie. I reckon the weird philosophical side of my brain hasn't quite turned off yet lol.

[wasabikitcat]

community college is so funny because half of the teachers are like "For this class you need to use lockdown browser for all quizzes and tests. You need to buy this 70 dollar textbook, and all papers turned in must be in APA format with a title page even if they're only 500 words long. I will not accept late assignments. Also you have a minimum of 4 assignments a week." and the other half are like "you don't need proctoring for the final exam I trust you. here's a download link to a pirated copy of the textbook. as long as your writing is coherent and demonstrates an understanding of the material I literally could not care less what format you use. I can't figure out how canvas works so I'm not giving you due dates, just make sure it's turned in before the grading period ends. your only weekly assignment is a forum post with a minimum of 100 words."

[luckyyyduckyyy]

AH DANG I JUST REMEMBERED I DON'T HAVE A HALLOWEEN COSTUME PREPARED! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[wereh0gz]

Guess who's thinking up a new au to make themself sad with

[blackjackkent]

Rakha, being the genius at extrapolation that she is, figures everything out almost as soon as the details of the situation becomes clear. And she doesn't like what she sees. She doesn't want to see it, doesn't want to understand.

But the conclusion is inescapable.

There are intellect devourers here. They are fighting the githyanki - and dying, because the githyanki are far more terrifying fighters.

One of the githyanki, as they turn towards Rakha with their fists raised, bellows: "Friend of ghaik! You will be cleansed!"

And the damning final fact - in the skull, there is no sign of the guardian... only a hulking illithid figure in ornate black-and-purple armor, engaged in a battle for its life with the swarming monks.

As Rakha watches, it lifts an enormous boulder in a telekinetic grasp and hurls it towards one of the monks. The woman dodges aside in a flipping leap and slams her boot into the illithid's chest.

It sprawls backwards next to Rakha's boots. Another wave of intellect devourers surges forward in its place, and the monks look at each other, then vanish in a burst of light.

Dimension Door, Rakha thinks - absently, automatically, a by-the-way understanding of the magic at work. Regrouping for another push. They will be back.

But for a moment she can't think about that, because the illithid is staring up at her. She feels its voice resonate in her head - and it is not the guardian's voice, but the magic is the same, the channel it pushes through her mind is the same, and everything is terribly certain after all.

"Before you do anything--" it rasps. "I am your ally."

She knows. Damn it.

"We are in DANGER," it insists. Its voice is a basso rumble, distorted and strange - but the intensity of its agitation is unmistakable.

"Ghaik abomination!" Lae'zel cries out. Her eyes have gone wide and her hand is on her greatsword; Rakha can see the trembling in it. "By the One True Sky - what is this madness?!"

(A/N: Whoo boy. I've never had Lae'zel actually here for this interaction before. She sounds maaaaaaad. D: )

The illithid jerks its head to indicate something behind it; Rakha lifts her eyes to fully take in the room for the first time.

At the far end of the stone chamber is a globe of pure energy, within which is trapped a single gith prisoner, bound by chains of lightning. Instinctively, Rakha recognizes the magic at work here too; it is tied to the illithid, who has been maintaining this prison and siphoning power off of the gith. With the illithid's brief incapacitation, though, the power is fading; the prisoner inside is moving, starting to struggle.

"The githyanki is the source of our protection against the Absolute," the illithid says sharply. "I must subdue him or everything we've worked towards is lost."

It pushes to its knees, then to its feet - its eyes remaining locked with Rakha's the whole time. "Don't let my form deceive you," it growls. "I am the one that's been protecting you. I am the one that came to you in your dreams."

She knows. She can feel the truth of what it says in the way its voice resonates in her head. She can even feel the flickering brush of the peace it's brought her in the past.

It drifts a few inches towards her. "HELP ME," it says insistently.

KILL IT, snarls the beast in her head.

She remembers with visceral clarity the first day that she awoke on the nautiloid. She remembers hunting down the illithid that put the worm in her head and hurling herself at it with fire in her hands, wanting nothing other than to rip its throat out for what it did to her. Part of her wants nothing more than to do the same to this thing in front of her now.

Imposter, the beast points out, squirming and roiling with rage. It tricked us. It used us. It is illithid. It is the enemy. Its blood will spatter like paint. Kill it. Kill it. KILL IT!

She shudders all over with the effort to think clearly. Illithid - yes. But it is the guardian, too. It is (somehow) the woman who has protected her. Who has brought her relief and peace.

In a practical sense, the critical point is that this illithid somehow has protected them from transforming. But if she is honest with herself, that is not the first thing on her mind. The idea of losing those moments of peace fills her with a desperate panic that overrides everything else, even the beast. Even if it comes from an illithid. Even if she has been tricked, all this time.

"What do you need me to do?" she asks hoarsely.

There is no emotion in the illithid's face, and yet she senses relief in its voice. "The honor guard!" it says sharply. "Eliminate them! My forces are weakened by their assault - but with your help, we can turn this around. Destroy the guard. I will subdue their master!"