#def worth the lost sleep

[edge-oftheworld]

close my eyes has honestly just solidified my conviction to live my life in a way that satisfies and honours what I actually want even when it’s weird

[velvetsainz]

summary: [ cl16 x fem!reader ] charles is away in baku and you remind him of what he's missing. part two.

word count: 1.3k

content warnings: smut under the cut (minors dni pls!), pwp, use of explicit language, phone sex, masturbation, google-translated french (lmao), a dash of fluff, i like em dashes too much

a/n: baby's first smutlet! i've been writing for like twelve years but i've never posted to tumblr, so here's to first times! there'll def be at least a part ii to this, but i'm also hoping to write for other drivers soon(ish). also giant mega thank you to @multiseb21 + @lecrep for your support—y'all have been so incredibly sweet & i am so thankful for you!! anyways, i hope y'all like this! enjoy, loves! xx

“Chérie,” his voice crooned over the line, a soft laugh leaving your lips. “Don’t tease, mon ange—it’s already hard enough being away from you for so long.”

“Weren’t you the one who said he’d be fine just a month ago?,” you retorted, voice low.  The cards were in your hands now, and Charles was desperate.  He was a nomad lost in the desert and you were his oasis on the horizon, just the sound of your voice enough to slake his thirst.

“Yes, but then you sent me that picture and—” You hear him curse again under his breath, his fist acting as a poor substitute for the velvet heat of your walls. He swore he wasn’t going to let you leave that bed once he got his hands on you again.

Charles wasn’t entirely wrong: you were the biggest fucking tease known to mankind.  Earlier that evening you sent him a semi-absentminded photo of you fresh from the shower, steam still obscuring the best parts of the photo with a fresh white towel around your hips and one gathering your hair on top of your head.  He’d always had something about you fresh from the shower—every time he’d nearly pounce as soon as you’d pad back into the bedroom from the steamy confines of the bathroom, hair wrapped on top of your head just as it was now.  (Part of you thought it was something primal in him: you’d washed away his scent on your skin and he needed to make his territory known again, that horn dog.)  Still, he was ever the gentleman and would make the endeavor more than worth your while.

“Yeah, that was pretty bad of me, wasn’t it?,” you ceded with a knowing smirk on your lips as you sat back from your desk, closing your laptop slowly.  You’d wanted to get a little more work done after your shower, but the Monégasque wasn’t keen to let sleeping dogs lie and needed to hear your voice for himself.

“So bad, chérie,” he agreed with tone of exasperation, a heavy sigh passing through the phone, “And you’re not even here to help a–”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t help in other ways,” you were quick to remind him, the words coming from your mouth quicker than your shame would force you to bottle them up.  Heat was creeping to your cheeks, and you could feel the familiar coil of desire tightening deep in the pit of your belly.

“Are you—?”

“That’s why you called, isn’t it, baby?,” you asked only to get a stifled groan from the other side. “You wanted me to tell you how I’ve been thinking about you all day,” you continued, “how I miss your hands on my hips, your cock so deep—”

“Fucking hell,” Charles practically whines as you push yourself away from the desk now, allowing yourself to relax into the seat of the chair and your hips to ease apart despite every part of you wanting to grind them together to relieve the dull ache that rested between them.

“What would you do if I was there now, Cha?,” you asked softly, hand splayed out over the plush of your thigh, eyes glazing over as you pictured him there with you.  You wanted his hands everywhere; you couldn’t decide where you truly needed him most. Fingers curling against that hidden spot in your tight cunt, threaded through your hair and pulling your head back to rest on his shoulder, gripping your thighs so tight they’d leave bruises that he’d fuss over later—it all sounded like heaven compared to the lonely hell of your shared Monte Carlo flat.

“I want to taste you, mon cœur,” he replied shakily as his breath came faster, the sound of him fisting his cock becoming more and more prominent as time passed; he wasn’t going to last long like this, but you both already knew that—it wasn’t the point of this exercise.  “I’d have you coming on my tongue, let you taste yourself when I kiss you—putain,” the driver cursed once more as his brow furrowed.  He was leaking precum over his ironclad grip and all he wanted was to slide his fingers past your plump lips to feel the wet heat of your tongue take care of the mess.

You let out a tremulous breath over the line, one you hadn’t known you’d been holding onto so tightly until your head started swimming with need.  Your hand had drifted from its origin, rubbing lazy circles over the cotton of the panties you’d slipped into after the inciting picture.  On your top half was a worn, faded shirt of Charles that you’d taken a liking to as a nightshirt—especially when you were missing him as you were so desperately now.

“Need you in me,” you begged, the emptiness you felt so acutely coming to the forefront of your senses, “You always do such a good job filling me—my fingers don’t do you justice.”

You hear a groan on the other side of the line, the man now sitting on the edge of the bed as he tries to keep himself in check.  He wasn’t ready for this to be over so soon; you had him feeling like a teenager again, ready to spill at a moment’s notice. Granted, this wasn't anything new: there's something so intoxicating about you that destroyed whatever semblance of restraint, of control he had over his lust.

“Want you in my mouth, give me something better to do than tease you like this,” to which you received a choked merde, the man hanging on your every word as the hand between your legs abandoned its objective—you could take care of that later.  You were too caught in every little sound that passed his plush lips, listening for every little cue his body so willingly gave you.

“Want your hands in my hair, guiding me up and down your cock,” you keened for him on a whine, his breathing heavy and labored.  He was running at full speed to the cliff's edge, and you were there watching, waiting in the grass. “Want your cum on my tongue, baby,” you whined.

“Promise not to waste any, minette?,” he grunted, gritting his teeth as you hummed your assurances.  “Such a good girl f’me, yes–”

With a strained hiss and a groan he came sloppily over his hand, thankful enough that he wasn’t home in Monaco so he didn’t have to worry about cleaning up the mess he’d made. “Fuck,” he croaked, breathing heavy as he came down from the blinding high your words had catapulted him through.  It wasn’t like he hadn’t been taking care of business when duty called, but something about your voice, the thought of you there…it clutched everything into a higher gear.

“Better?,” you asked, sly smile audible to the Ferrari driver; he didn’t need to see you to know the shit-eating, satisfied smile that took over your lips.

With a tired laugh he nodded, slumping back onto the cool rumpled sheets of the hotel bed as he stared absently at the dark ceiling.  It was three in the morning in Baku, and he couldn’t sleep—the thoughts your cheeky picture had invited wouldn’t let him.

“Get some rest, tiger,” you teased him, knowing he’d have to be awake in a few short hours. You debated sending him another picture in the morning as motivation, tiding him over until you’d join him later that weekend.

“Que ferais-je sans toi, mon amour?,” he asked, sleep heavy in his voice as he rolled the right way onto the bed and running a hand through his hair.  He’d deal with the mess he’d made in the morning along with the flowers he’d send you—he really didn’t know what he’d do without you.

“I guess we’ll never know, hm?,” you replied gently, smile melting into something softer as you fiddled with the gleaming ring on your left hand.

[okkalo]

can u do a drabble/scenario with bllk boys ( nagi, baro, isagi, rin, sae and any other you’d like) where they gift their s/o hand made gifts

like i definitely think kunigami or chigiri would know how to crochet so they’d make their s/o a blanket or book cover

thankyou!! and have a great day!!

hi again!! yes i can do that :) i can definitely see chigiri doing some crochet idk about kunigami though,, he would def learn though!! anyways i hope you enjoy and have a good day!! 🫶

also on my blog scenarios and drabbles are two different things so i’m gonna assume you mean writing with no headcanons;;

characters: nagi, barou, isagi, rin, sae

nagi

honestly, nagi was not one to do crafts. he wasn’t one to do anything at all, really. the only reason he decided to do something is because he saw someone doing origami and the teacher wouldn’t let him sleep. besides, he’s heard you talk about how cute handmade gifts are, so, why not?

he ended up making a cat. a really bad cat. none of it was symmetrical and the face he drew on could give you nightmares. you were careful not to say anything about it when he handed it to you when walking home, knowing this is a once-in-lifetime opportunity.

“you made this for me?” you asked, examining the poorly folded cat. nagi hummed in agreement, hand sliding down to take yours. you made sure to give him a kiss on the cheek as a thanks.

“don’t expect another one,” he mumbled, eyes struggling to stay opened in the bright sunlight.

“i wasn’t expecting another,” you replied, giving him a small squeeze on the hand. he actually might make another one just to get another kiss on the cheek.

barou

the best you’ll get out of barou is him fixing your clothes. he’s never been one for giving gifts, especially one’s that he hand makes. he feels too stupid doing it. he’s always one to give you flowers, just never anything made from him.

however, he will absolutely fix your clothes to how you desire. lost a button? immediately sews it back on. got a rip in your shirt? fixes it like a pro.

he can also make you a piece of clothing if you beg. he would rather not, though. and don’t even think about teasing him for any of this.

you had just gotten out of the shower to retreat back to your room and you were met with the pants you had given up on sitting on your bed. you had been complaining about the button popping off, upset due to losing your favorite pair of jeans. now, suddenly, they were sitting nicely in front of you with a button. you certainly didn’t do that. you know exactly who did though.

“barou? did you fix my pants?” you ask, trudging into the living room to see him wiping down the coffee table. he barely looked up, too focused on the task at hand.

“yeah,” his gruff made you smile, skipping over to sit down next to him. you gave a sweet kiss on his cheek, hugging him afterwards as well.

“thank you.”

isagi

he saw you fanning over people making flowers out of pipe cleaners and decided to give it a go. actually enjoyed it so much that he started making more than he needed. gave you a full size bouquet at the end of the day.

your jaw dropped at the colorful pipe cleaners all bundled together to make a bouquet. you excitedly took the bouquet, flashing your boyfriend a huge smile. “isagi, i love these! did you make them all?”

he sheepishly nodded, scratching the back of his head, “yeah, i didn’t realize i made a lot until all the green pipe cleaners were gone.” his confession drew a soft laugh out of you, his cheeks tinting at the sound.

“it’s a perfect amount, thank you,” you drew him in for a kiss, him loving to feeling of your upturned lips against his.

rin

he had to hear nights worth of your gushing over small crochet plushies until he finally decided to try it out. little did he know, he was getting into a lot. absolutely struggled with the hook, muttering cusses every time something didn’t go his way.

rin, however, was not a quitter. he finally finished one, though severely disappointed with how bad it had looked. rin was also a perfectionist to heart. so, he gave it another go, this time paying attention to every small detail. finally, weeks later of hiding his project in drawers you never check, he presented you a small hello kitty plushie.

“oh my god! rin this is adorable! you seriously made this?” you squealed, immediately taking the small plush in both of your hands to examine it.

“yeah,” he spoke nonchalantly, heart secretly jumping in joy seeing you so excited for something he did. you jumped up to give him a big hug, giggling all the while.

“thank you, my sweet boyfriend,” give him an exaggerated kiss on the cheek. he loves it when you do it. don’t mind his sigh.

sae

you knew better than to expect a decent gift from the heart from sae. that didn’t stop the leap your heart did once he handed you a piece of paper saying that he drew you. your poor, poor heart.

he drew you alright. just in the worst way possible. at first you wanted to believe he actually tried but was just horrible at drawing, but the more you looked at it the more you could tell he couldn’t have given less of a shit what he drew. he watched your face changes in joy too, seeing how your excited smile turned into a weird squiggle and then to a plain frown.

“sae, you did this on purpose,” you looked up to see his smirk, your heart officially dropping.

“i think i drew you perfectly,” your whine only made him feel better. give him the cold shoulder later and he might just think about apologizing while holding you close.

unedited thanks for reading!

[gabessquishytum]

the no sex-ed virgin dream is great but also consider a dream who HAS had sex and DOES know how sex works but has just only had very very bad sex. its always been over in 10 minutes tops with very little foreplay and usually no aftercare at all. just plain missionary and everything.

so he gets with hob and hob, upon realizing that dream's had sex but he's never had good sex, makes it his mission to make up for all the lost time dream could've been getting fucked into the fifth dimension but instead just spent like...lying there awkwardly in the aftermath.

and from there it could either, 1., turn dream into an insatiable sex fiend (who we are all familiar with at this point) or 2., dream has no idea when to ask for sex. or how. so they only ever fuck when hob initiates, not for lack of wanting on dreams part at all, he's just not used to it. so then he ends up taking cold showers and going for walks and biting his lip until he bleeds to try to distract himself from the horniness because he's too awkward to ask hob to fuck him, and equally as awkward to ask hob to teach him how to ask for things. although he def did not consider that as a possibility because he's stupid

I loooove the bad sex trope. And like, Dream isn’t bad at sex, he’s just… slightly clueless. No one has ever helped him out, he’s only had awkward hookups with people who weren’t interested in his pleasure.

One night he’s talking to Hob and he’s like “I don’t understand what all the fuss is about, it’s over in five minutes and it’s messy and sometimes it hurts. And the orgasm really isn’t worth it, I might as well just masturbate.”

Hob is like “ohhh you sweet summer child you don’t know!!! No one has ever treated you right!!!” And of course his clever solution to that problem is to proposition Dream and make him change his mind about sex.

At first Dream lies there like a dead fish and Hob has to pull out all the stops to make him actually participate. They get there in the end, though, and Dream is the one topping for once (people always assumed he’d bottom and he just went along with it) and he slowly gets better at it over the course of the night until he has an epiphany around 4am when Hob rides him and talks dirty to him. Maybe sex is the best thing in the world actually.

Dream is now a horny disaster with a massive crush on Hob and a perpetual erection. He wants to ask Hob to fuck him so he can maybe enjoy bottoming for once. He employs some absolutely terrible seduction techniques which basically amount to getting naked in front of Hob and hoping for the best.

Fortunately Hob is like “oh god I need to finish what I started so Dream can have a functional sex life”. The only complication is that he’s in love with Dream. What could possibly go wrong? Many things - Dream is an insatiable sex fiend, Hob is a lovesick fool, and neither of them are getting any sleep for the foreseeable future.

[fracturedporcelaindoll]

Dear diary,

I've been considering getting hair cut short. One of those bob styles cause hate how the heat makes my medium length hair feel so icky~

Read a few articles on styles and on hair. Did you know you're hair grows the fastest between ages 15 to 20 or 25 depending on article? Apparently guys after 30, may experience thinning and hair loss because hair doesn't grow as quickly after 30 and for girls it's like after 40 to 50 that hair doesn't grow as quickly according to various beauty articles.~

So I don't know, mean could cut hair short but what if it took forever and a week to grow back out? I don't even think short hair would look good on me, less variety for styling but at the same time I just dont think am pretty atm either~

I think def want to try blunt or curtain bangs tho, they look cute and are kinda childish and tbh I want the adorable factor tho maybe I am just not that cute?~

Also like never ever foam hot cocoa pple, I ordered a small hot cocoa and the barista made it like it was a latte and the taste, sooo awful but didn't want to waste the purchase. I mean if I were a more less caring or wasn't worried about being confrontational in public I would have said something~

Pillows, I need a good pillow, am sure if I had one it might help improve sleep but I've yet to find a good one. Itd have to be fluffy like a cloud and cool like a winter breeze. I saw the most adorable pillow ever but problem is it's 270 with tax. Like if it were 80, I'd consider it sure expense but might be worth it if it's as good quality as claimed by advertising.~

Unfortunately I am just not sure, I mean I'd have to save for like at least a few months to get it and do I really need it? Its childish cause shaped like a dashound in a hot dog costume... but like where would I find such an adorable pillow again, it's unique~

I need to decide Halloween costume too, I mean if do go ahead and get gothic outfit from poll could pair it with some bat wings or angel ones and have costume. But that's like putting a bulleyes on yourself, dressing like an angelic being or succubus/bat demon girl would make people stare~

Plus the demon/succubus aspect is kinda ironically hilarious cause I can't even flirt with guys or girls for that matter, little miss shy and awkward~

I was brave and contacted customer service over missing package and about refund. I was ping ponged back and forth between company and shipping provider until finally got confirmation they'd issue refund as package was lost and couldn't determine where it got lost at etc~

I didn't actually talk, it was online communication through service line but still~

I took some pictures of sky because the clouds were particularly picturesque and fluffy~ I felt so self conscious though like do I just look weird or something? Haven't you ever seen someone look up at sky with camera before?~

I am tempted to just avoid public all together until October but realistically I'll get lured out in July for cotton candy vendors, fresh squeezed fair lemonade and prize contests to try to win cute plushies <4th of july>. Do I think fireworks are beautiful? Yes but am one of those people that would want to wear noise cancelling headphones and look like a dork cause of it~ the loud noise though just unsettles me, it's like really loud thunder or lighting makes me jump scare myself sometimes~

I found a Harry Potter themed bar crawl event and golf event that I kinda want to go too. Not so much the bar as mini golf the thing is I know it'll be crowded and am not the best at mini golf soooooo do I really want to torture myself mentally by weaving through crowds, long lines and ultimately failing to win prizes by missing the getting the golf ball into the hole?~

Plus I'd want to wear a harry potter themed costume and have nothing to wear for that~

Including pictures of clouds because I can~

[chilipepperconverse]

Ao3 Author tag game!

tagged by my bestie @plushie-sentai <3

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

19!

2. What is your Ao3 word count?

74,854 holy shit. i hadn't checked it in awhile lmao

3. What fandoms do you write for?

oh all kinds of shit, but rn i'm up to my eyeballs in tokusatsu. i tend to jump from fandom to fandom depending on my current hyperfixations HSKDJGS

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

in the fall we sleep all day (the magnus archives, jonmartin)

the end was soon (the magnus archives, jonmartin)

feeling so alive, feeling something (my hero academia, tododeku)

we both need it to forget this fear (the magnus archives, jonmartin)

if that's what it takes (my hero academia, tododeku)

all of these are like. at least 4 years old LMAO

5. Do you respond to comments?

i always do!!

6. Which of your fics has the angstiest ending?

mmmm depends on your definition i think. if you include canon compliant events its def one of my danganronpa fics (a foreign still or light of the moon) but that feels boring to me SO i might say my most recent fic for kamen rider ex-aid (or just mine tonight) since it ends on kindof a sour note for the characters? im not sure tbh, as much as i love angst in a fic i tend to like happier or ambiguous endings.

7. Which of your fics has the happiest ending?

that's an easy one! my dimension 20: mentopolis fic (whale fall) was written before the finale and was my guess as to what would happen w one of the pairs of characters, and its very sweet and wholesome i think :3

8. Do you get hate on fics?

thankfully no!

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

i do! i used to be terrified of it, but i think i've gotten better the more i write! i don't hold any bars on what kind of smut i'll write, either-- whatever the characters are workin with, i'll do it!! lmao

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest crossover you've written?

i used to! back when i wrote for achievement hunter i wrote an au where the fake AH crew were killjoys, like from gerard way's comics and the MCR album danger days :p i got uncomfy with RPF as i got older tho so those fics are all lost media now HSJGHJD

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

nope! not that i'm aware of anyways lol

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope but if anyone wants to... pleading emoji

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

not unless roleplay counts... i used to rp a certain anime with friends mostly as a joke in high school but we did try and write story-format roleplay a few times

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

i don't much care for it or the property anymore bc i've got some bad experiences tied to it, but i think the ship i've gone the most batshit over is probably jonmartin from the magnus archives. right now tho? definitely best match from kamen rider build <3

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

my magnus archives dnd au (write an anthem worth repeating), for aforementioned reasons of not feeling good about the source material anymore :( a shame bc i thought my writing in that fic was nice

16. What are your writing strengths?

i think i'm pretty good at characterization! i get a lot of comments saying i give good insight into how characters feel which is lovely to hear, bc thats what i like most about writing fanfic!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

PACING... AND PLOTS IN GENERAL... why do you think i only write one-shots!! 😭

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don't trust myself enough to do it right... i write a lot of fic for japanese media so the most i'll do is use the japanese word for something that can't be translated (names of foods for example)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

god probably warrior cats in like 3rd grade... on Ao3 tho it was achievement hunter, but those are gone like i said earlier </3

20. Favorite fic you've written?

is it cheating if i say my wip?? ;3

i'm gonna tag @meganechan05 bc i cant remember who else im moots with who writes fic but if you see this and wanna do it go ahead n say i tagged you!! :D

[ginshachocosplay]

Cosplay 2010 - Sakura Con

Oh man! I was going through my computer and found a bunch of old cosplay photos that I thought was lost! Back in my wee cosplay days of 2010 me and my friends did a .Hack//G.U. cosplay group at Sakura Con here in Seattle, WA. So many people brought fabulous costumes and it was a ton of fun! For that shoot I made four costumes: Silabus, Ovan, Haseo (2nd form), and Endrance (I was Endrance). I was so proud of those costumes, though I would not use the same materials or techniques today at all! This was in the early days where I used materials that looked right even if it wouldn't function right, be too hot, too fragile, not structurally sound, etc. As such, ended up making Haseo out of upholstery vinyl. Don't envy them at all 'cus I imagine it was pretty hot and constrictive!

Not posting their faces because I lost contact with these guys years ago and don't believe in posting faces online other than mine without permission, even if it's a cosplay in a public sphere.

Sylabus is first! I made the majority of the costume mainly because my friend didn't have the time to do so between school and other projects (they are/were an amazing artist!!). I was particularly proud of how this one came out looking considering I had only been doing cosplay for around 3-ish years at the time. The lines look great! They did the wig and the sword. We lost contact years ago after graduating high school so I hope they're doing well for themselves (I miss you if you're out there!).

Next is Ovan! I am so proud of not only how the costume looked but that damn arm of his! I spent so long cutting cardboard and foam core and painting.... ug! But it looked incredible! He paid me $300 for the entire costume including materials at the time. Def would not do that again, ever. But again it was in my younger days where I didn't value my time or effort as much... also it's pretty but, you know, don't look at the seams or the construction lol. Not pictured: the glasses. His face was perfect for the costume but since I lost contact with them years ago I don't want to post their face without permission.

Then Haseo, 2nd form. We saw a hack online about using reflective tape to make costume parts glow when flash is used. It worked so well! As said above, this is all vinyl with puff paint and foam, so it was HOT to wear. Bless this guy for being a good sport, especially since it took me something like 2-ish years to actually put it together...

Finally, myself as Endrance. Once again, a whole lot of work for a costume that I would not at all make in the same way. I bought a cording foot for my machine and carefully pieced together a Jet Set material and sewed the cording on.... the cording did not stretch. So I used a stretch material with a non-stretch cord for what is essentially a body suit.... yiiikkkess! Looks great, don't look inside cus it is not remotely clean. But that's what the early days are about! I had fun, they had fun, tried and learned a lot, so it was all worth it! All the all-nighters and, at times, multiple days of not sleeping. Literally can't do that anymore cus I'm not built like I was at 20. :)

[chososcamgirl]

HEYHEYHEY SIGMA IYAAA I JUST FINSIHED MY WORK SO HERES MY OFFICAL DAILY UPDATEEEEE 😈‼️HOW WAS UR DAY SIGMA?? IM PRETTYYY SURE ITS LIKE 8AM RN WHERE UR AT SO RISE AND GRINDDD YK THE DRILL 🙏🔥🐺

ANYWAY HERES THE DAILY YAP

ARNRBEBEBHRBEBEJEBE I HATEEEEE MY ENGLISH REACHER SO MUCH BECAUSE TELL ME WHY I CHECKED MY GRADE AND SEE THAT IM LITERALLY FAILING ENGLISH?? SO I CHECKED TO SEE WHY I WAS FAILING.. NO MISSINF ASSIGMENTS.. As IN ALL MY WORK… WHY AM I FAILING??? I TRIED TO CHECK IN WITH MY GRADEBOOK AND IT DIDNT HAVE A FREAKING REASON RAJHHHH WHY AM I FAILING IF THERE IS NOTHING TO FAIL ME FOR?? I SWEAR SHES JUST MESSING WITH MY GRADE CUS SHE HATES ME.. SHES ALWAYS TARGETING ME IN CLASS TOOO ARHRHRHEBEJEHEH AND I HAVE HER TMRW. UGHHHH IM GONNA START TWEAKINGGGG I HATEEE ENGLISH SMMM SOMEONE GET ME OUTTTTTT… I NEED A BREAK FROM SCHOOL CUS IM ALWAYS SO TIRED AND ITS LITERALLY SO DRAINING BUT IF I GO TO THE COUNSELOR SHES GONNA TRY TO GET ME TO GET A DIAGNOSIS FOR SOMETHING ☹️☹️ AND ALSO I DONT WANT TO MISS CLASS SINCE I WANNA LOCK IN BUT LIKE.. ARGHHH SCHOOL IS SERIOUSLY KILLING MEEEE… NOT MY MOST SIGMA MOMENT RN.. JENENEJEJEBEB ANSWER I LOST MY STUDENT ID… BUT I HOPE UR SKIBIDI BC IF UR SKIBIDI THEN I CAN BASK IN YOUR ALPHANESS (or whatever the saying is) 😈🐺‼️BUT TRUSTTTT NEXT WEEK IS GONNA BE GOOD SINCE ILL BE MANIFESTINF (by BARKING AT THE MOON 🐺🤫🔥)

ALSO I NEED TO KNOW.. (QOTD⁉️⁉️) WHATS UR FAV MOVIE SERIES (not anime) ‼️‼️

KAYKAY HAVE A SKIBIDI ALPHA RIZZLER DAY 😈 BYE LOVE YOU SIGMA ALPHA 🙂‍↕️😘

- 🐺

HI ALPHA!!🐺🐺

YAYYY i love to see you on ur school grind😈😈🙌🙌 ITS 7:29PM RN!!! sorry for the late reply i was on my sjap grind😓 i think ur sleeping now alpha but when u wake up this will be answered 😈🐺 LETS GET INTO IT

istg ur english teacher is an OPP😒 it would’ve been on sight for her bc WHY IS SHE FAILING YOU WHEN YOU HAVE NO MISSING ASSIGNMENTS HELLO?? FOR NO REASON TOO? diabolical work. if this keeps on happening you should def talk to a higher up bc this happened to me in senior year. my eng teacher (who was the head of the department) was like BARELY passing me but the year before that my OTHER english teacher (also was the head of department but she retired that year) had me at the top of her class EVEN AT THE TOP OF THE YEAR LEVEL. like i literally got top of english that year but then when this other teacher came i failed my first assignment like what? istg they mark off of favouritism bc some of the shit i read from my peers that were supposedly marked higher than me was so ass like i’m sorry. but i don’t want that to happen to u so if it continues to happen pls talk to somebody abt it bc it’s actually unfair😭 if they get try to diagnose u with something just know it’ll be 100% sigma😈 you got this!! #lockin!! make the school ur omega🙂‍↕️🐺 I BELIEVE IN YOU!! i always feel skibidi after i read ur asks so i am skibidi rn which means UR skibidi🫵🫵 HELP NOT THE BARKING AT THE MOON😭 but yes i will also manifest that for u too <3

QOTD ANSWER‼️ hmm my favourite movie series would have to be wait i just looked at netflix i can’t choose just one SO I WILL GIVE U MY TOP 5!!

- alice in borderland (the wait for season 2 WAS SO EXCRUCIATING but so worth it)

- how to get away with murder (SO SO GOOD!!)

- brooklyn nine-nine! (it has a special place in my heart and such a funny show jake peralta i love you)

- pretty little liars (started watching it at the ripe age of 10 and fell in love with it, i revisit it often)

- AND YOU!! (just seasons 1 through 3 bc season 4 was ass lowkey didn’t even finish it😭)

also i want to watch suits but im gonna watch it after i finish bsd :3

TY FOR THIS ALPHA!! TELL ME UR FAVOURITES IN THE NEXT CHECK IN!! I HOPE U HAVE A GOOD DAY WHEN U SEE THIS AND REMEMBER TO MAKE SCHOOL UR OMEGA😈😈 ILY <333

[entitled-fangirl]

Ok so I don’t think this would actually work I’m not expecting anything but I’d love it if I could get your thoughts abt it 😭 non-virgin reader…hear me out I’m not a virgin and I get that you Need your maidenhead/virginity in the gotverse if you’re a woman but I’m like. over it…I’ll do a little pretending and immerse myself in the reader it doesn’t really change anything but I have been wondering lately what it would be like if the reader Wasn’t a virgin. I do think everyone would care though except Targaryens bc I feel like they don’t give af as long as you go about it secretly. Like Rhaenyra in that brothel wouldn’t have been a big deal if she wasn’t caught, her dad didn’t seem to care that much except that she got caught + was with Daemon. But anyway. I don’t see any of the non-Targ guys being like 🤷‍♀️ about it even if the reader did it in a low key was and everyone was convinced reader was still a virgin 🤔 what do you think 🤠 sexism in the gotverse needs to stay there in fics to be realistic I fear 😭😭😭

SUCH A GOOD THOUGHT

I think when writing anything in the GoT universe, this is definitely a big factor in the culture.

But here's great food for thought- they would tell if you were a maiden by your hymen, right?

Bruh, they all ride on horseback or dragonback. You can't tell me that some women's hymens didn't break. And then how are men gonna tell the difference??

It's crazy that men think their dicks are SO great that they change a woman's status and worth.

I try not to always have a virgin reader, because as you said, most of us are just having to pretend or like even have a painful reminder of how they lost theirs and stuff. And... if you're already writing a wife!reader- yeah, she def not a virgin.

For characters specifically, it varies.

You're right. I don't think the Targaryens really give a shit. They're here for a good time, not a long time. I could see almost all of them being cocky as shit about taking someone's virginity, but like... they all visit brothels all the time and/or have people they sleep with. Exceptions are Aegon and Aemond. I think they'd throw a fit cause they're little bitches. They want to feel the fucking power of taking their wive's virginity. And if they weren't the first ones, I think they'd hold it over their wife's head.

Now, the Velaryons? I think that's different.

I think Coryls and Rheanys think that it's important, however, it's not terrible if they're not. Weirder shit happens.

And then Jace Velaryon is the same. He'd probably want to be the first one to pleasure his wife, however, he wouldn't disown someone for that. He'd take the person he loves as is. No exception. He's like his daddy Harwin.

But Lords like Stark? I'm not gonna lie, that might be a dealbreaker for him. He's too much of a bitch for tradition. It's a downfall of his, really. Like, I don't think he'd care as a whole for himself, but for the sake of tradition, I don't think he'd vibe.

The best chance is with Targaryens for sure. Like, look at Daemon. Does that man look like he gives two shits who you've slept with?? He's gonna make sure he's the best you've ever had so you can compare. And he has NO shame about it.

That's my opinion personally.

It sucks that this is such a big deal in the universe cause honestly, it's not a big deal at all now. It shouldn't be a big deal.

That was such a long-winded answer.

Long story short- we need more stories where that just isn't mentioned/doesn't add or subtract from the storyline

[petrichorium]

raspberry and zzz for shuvi, please!!

raspberry ౨ৎ how did the two of you meet?

Truthfully a bit of a little mermaid moment LMFAOOOOO it’s post-luffy by about a yr so he’s already lost his arm. I’m the lighthouse keeper on my home island (which is an autumn island in the new world very New England coded) n the red-haired pirates r actually intending to drop by when they get caught up in a storm—which I fear I Did warn them about via transponder snail but Men Never Fucking Listen smfh. Anyway in the mayhem baby Uta gets thrown overboard (bc “Uta is canon but film red is not” means I get full creative freedom and she is Vital to this) and shanks jumps to save her. Theyre separated from the crew & the ship which gets a real thrashing; the others wash up near town but I end up having to pull Shanks and Uta from the water by my lighthouse. He ends up passing out after getting a glimpse of me—and hearing me grumble about how goddamn heavy he is………. uta’s largely unscathed and I end up with a very chatty little girl and an unconscious man in my guest bed whose identity I am very resolutely ignoring bc famous pirates r not worth the hassle gdi

N e way. I call up the barkeep in town and Beckman n the other officers stop by to pick up their daughter + still unconscious captain and they r very thankful. Im like great u can thank me by leaving pls do not come back bye. Unfortunately for me the ship rlly does get trashed they end up needing to stay a couple weeks to patch up their own injuries and the ship itself, and shanks is Very determined to thank me Properly which means the first time we truly meet a week later when I go into town for supplies he’s throwing his arm around me and saying I should drink w them……… terrible reaction I fear. Like I cannot stress enough how much he and the others would terrify me LMFAOOOOOOO loud drunk men r not my speed. But it’s too late shanks has his sights set now,,,,,,,,,, my fate was sealed just like that. Also Uta is attached to me and tho I am unapologetically mean to shanks she has a standing invite to my home so

zzz ౨ৎ what are your sleeping positions like?

Shanks is Such a clinger ngl. When he’s sober he tries to keep his hands to himself (bc honestly I am Not built for the tropical climate and I overheat so easily) but like. He’s never sober LMFAOOOOOO def keeps me on his right side and will manhandle me in his sleep to keep his arm around me. Likes to drag me to lay on his chest too but is def not opposed to being held himself. For a while we sleep in a hammock together and I p much always lay on him in a hammock situation but eventually we get a real bed……. And promptly feel like it’s way too big JDNFKSNFKSN

Send me some selfship asks!

[xb0rder-7inex]

I have absolutely no way to contact him now and I know that's just him trying to regain control.

I won't let it get to me. I'm going to choose to focus on myself and rebuilding my own life.

He's just trying to hurt me. And it's working. But I can't do this to myself again. It isn't worth losing myself over it again.

I'm going to try to get some sleep. He's def going to keep me blocked all weekend I'm pretty sure. At least all of tomorrow probably. Just to "teach me the hard way" which were his exact words so he is still choosing to be abusive. He doesn't realize that I can't lie on the stand when I testify against him and he's just adding on to the pile of shit already stacked against him and making things so much worse. He's trying to tell me my apologies don't mean anything to him and that he has girls lined up which I know is just him saying shit because I slept with someone else last time and I told him other people deserve me and I think that just triggered him and he's in his head about it now and trying to get me in my head about mine because he wants me to feel how he feels.

Sometimes it really is the truth that he doesn't deserve me but I didn't mean it when I said it to him.

I can't love him right now. Turning it off. Focusing on inward love. Choosing to love myself for now.

Tomorrow will be a self care day. I won't let his absence affect me too much. I can't keep wondering if he's coming back

If he's going to leave and he wants to leave then I have to let him.

If I wake up sometime during the night I'll check again because he's always on until 3 or 4am but I really don't think I'm getting unblocked. Unless he finds a way to calm down by then but he's good at holding a fucking grudge and this isn't the first time he's forced me to be without him.

I can't worry about losing him this time though. I've already lost everything else to be with him and I can't rely on him to build with me. I don't trust him to be consistent.

I wish I could just believe in giving him space right now and that things will get better but he's really upset and I just don't know.

He does this so often and it makes me think he won't stop physically abusing me either.

I have to focus on me. I've made it through every other time. I'm not suicidal anymore. I can do this. With or without him.

I'm going to try to scroll myself to sleep. I'm having a pretty long anxiety attack but I know that I'm going to be okay.

Rewiring your brain is so hard.

[bleuflowerfields]

sskk could go either way with who throws who's plushie lmfao they are POSSESSIVE

personally think they both own plushies (atsu obv has a white tiger, prob new while aku owns a black cat plushie which has def seen better days) but like. the moment both of them realize the other had a plushie they rush to see who threw the other's plushie out the window at top speed first out of spite and also jealousy towards said plushies getting more attention then well. them.

nobody won lmao (they ended up flinging them out at the same time and sskk ends up cuddling each other. the end)

kunichuuzai i can see all three of them owning plushies (kuni has this really cute bear thing, and yk that dazai would have his crab and chuuya his little snail). just that they hide it at all costs solely because all of them are emotionally constipated and think that they'll never hear the end of it

so it's like this very shaky truce ig?? or like I could see dazai putting kunichuu's plushies (this is in case they DO find out) on the floor as soon as they sleep so he can sandwich himself between his boyfriends instead. which sounds like a win to me.

ranpoe have karl but I swear that if poe hasn't gotten jealous of karl warming up to ranpo more yet I need to give him an award. like he considers just locking him in a closet right b4 his boyfriend comes over because he's getting to his thirteenth reason why because of the damn raccoon

alright few other personal ships I'm adding here let's go

with sigzai I think dazai would just watch sigma cuddle his little cookie plush for a while b4 sleeping. (that he bought fir sigma as a surprise gift after he let slip that he REALLY liked cookies. not even to eat, he likes how they look too) like, he finds it super cute.

however he'd rather die than admit that he's actually a softie for plushies AND that he owns one. he keeps it hidden under his blanket

ranzai... I remember seeing an rb under this post about ranpo throwing all of dazai's plushies in a closet and I absolutely agree that the cheeky bastard would do that

or he hides them throughout the house for the hell of it and somehow dazai doesn't question why one of his plushies that he lost months ago turned up in his freezer of all places. frozen. or why one of them turned into a total mess in the microwave. he's getting too comfortable LOL

chuuran would essentially just be ranpo trying to steal chuuya's little snail plush in his sleep because that man has an absolute vice grip on it when he sleeps. somehow has it on him at all times so it's ranpo proof. essentially it's just a try not to evoke Chuuya's Wrath challenge LMFAO

so just. ranpo resigns to just sleeping on top of it to get his cuddles though he def has a vendetta against it and wants to fucking send it to kingdom come asap. it's like a hydrogen bomb vs a coughing baby except the plush is the bomb. weird vision but you get what I mean.

ok I think I went off there but yknow what it was worth it

im about to go to sleep so i ask who sleeps with a stuffed animal and who gets jealous and throws it off the bed

for

sskk

kunichuuzai

ranpoe

or whatever other ship exists in ur pretty heads

[assholemurphy]

i got all the units done and made the base for my graph. all i’ve got left to do is create wiggly lines at various tempos. hopefully i can copy and paste or find some on google images and strip them down in photoshop to make it go faster. actually, i should be able to do that regardless, so i think i’m gonna create them in photoshop and paste them into my word doc, but idk if i can paste images over shapes (lines) so i’ll have to test it before i put in too much work, but if it does work, i’ll only need 11 speeds, so it should take roughly an hour to make all of them (bc they have to look good). after that, i just have to add in text boxes (which i hope to also copy and paste, but if i can’t, it’s nbd, just a bit more work) and paste all the wiggly lines onto the graph at those points, which should take roughly another hour. so, i’ve got two hours of work left to do. and then i have to watch the first 30min of shrek: the musical on netflix. i can do the lines and stuff while at the drs office and (depending on how long i spend with my mom) before rehearsal. i might be able to watch s:tm before rehearsal, i might not. but, after class i have like, an hour free before my mom gets here, and i think i’m gonna nap, maybe. that should be enough to keep me going for the rest of the day. then, before bed, i’ll email this shit to hurricane bianca and tim the toolman and crash. or hang out with friends, idk just yet. i have an hour and a half before class rn, so i’m gonna get dressed, take my meds, and smoke, then i’ll see how long i have left, drink another monster, and maybe watch s:tm now. maybe.

we’re working on our monologues in class, so that means i’ll have some time to read atf and work on my mono character analysis. idk what’s happening in stagecraft, i just know i need to talk to prof j abt the spotlight shit i’m doing so ik wtf i’m doing. hopefully she doesn’t realize i’m dead tired. fingers crossed we can fake alertness, baby. done it before.

after that, i’mma nap for an hour, then go to my drs appt and work on my graph in the waiting room/while waiting to talk to the dr. hopefully i can get my adderall upped (not bc i want to abuse it, but bc it wears off too fast and it’s honestly not strong enough anymore bc i can’t focus after it levels out unless i constantly drink energy drinks and that’s not healthy). it’ll mean i probs won’t be able to abuse it ever again, tho, bc i’m afraid it would be too high to do that bc it already makes my heart race as is when i do that, but if it actually does its damn job the right fucking way, i won’t need to. that would be nice. i just want my fucking brain to work right, dammit. it’s all i want. if my brain could function in polite society, i’d be set. so, i’ll talk to him abt that, and abt my migraines and see if he can run some tests or something to see why they’re coming back (i’m p sure it’s stress/lack of sleep, but idk, that wasn’t what it was last time, so i’m a little worried).

but for now; meds, clothes, smoke, s:tm. in that order. then class. where i will try not to die. (tho, technically, i could get away with working on my graph in class if i wanted to, since my analysis isn’t due until tues and i can work on it this weekend, but the graph stuff is due (not technically, but hurricane biance is demanding it be done) by 11a tomorrow. like, i do get why, but the bitch could have been a little nicer abt it. or, idk, told me over fall break that he wanted it before the 19th??? ya know, when i had fucking time to do it???? fucking dumbass doesn’t give two shits abt anyone but himself. i’m p sure he’s not gonna like my work and is gonna either make me redo it or do it himself (and make me feel like shit) just bc it isn’t a++ material. it’s fuck a material, asshat. ik bc i’m good at hw, i just don’t do well with fake deadlines and no sleep. bitch. one day karma’s gonna knock him on his stupid ass and i’ll laugh myself to death. it’ll be great. i don’t know why ppl like him. he’s a horrible person. bitchy, snobby, flamboyant, and rude af. he’s just a jackass with no real personality or empathy.

so, i’mma get ready for class and try not to die. y’all cats have a great ass day. drink water, eat a vegetable, take a nap, punch a facist, whatever it takes to make your day great.

[meowzfordayz]

Hii,can I request for angst? Any is good. For kny fandom,f!reader X Kamaboko Squad and Hashiras(?)

Heyo! ☺️ To be completely transparent: I didn't write for the Kamaboko, nor all of the Hashira. I was inspired by the below mentioned song, and decided to write for whomever I felt certain lyrics suited best. Fulfilling your request would've taken ~much longer had I actually written for the Kamaboko AND all of the Hashira (mostly bc I didn't have ideas for everyone, so I would've been pulling teeth for ~a while 😆). W/ that communicated, I do hope you enjoy these angsty preferences. 🥺

Author’s Note: okay fr fr gonna try and write something ~short. Update: ~1,300 words… does that count as ~short ?? 🧐🥳

if this is goodbye, then…

Himejima Gyomei x Reader, Kocho Shinobu x Reader, Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader, Shinazugawa Sanemi x Reader, Tomioka Giyuu x Reader, Uzui Tengen x Reader

Word Count: ~1,300

CW: canonical violence, explicit language, implied Reader death

Song Inspo: Want You Back by 5 Seconds of Summer

~faqs~

‘Cause you know every morning I wake up, yeah I still reach for you

The lightness—the lack of you—gets easier to manage. He doesn’t listen for your smile as often anymore. Doesn’t tilt his head seeking the rhythm of your footsteps. Has almost forgotten the curve of your mouth, warm against the pad of his thumb. Time does heal all wounds. Just not all the way.

Because he still misses the vibrancy of your laughter — knows he’ll never hear such a sound again.

Because he still misses the reassurance of your arms flung around his waist — knows you’ll never squeeze his hips again.

Because he still reaches for you — waking up on his uncrowded futon.

Even though he knows.

You’ll never wake up again.

Can’t help but wondering if this is the last time that I’ll see your face

She’s tired, exhausted—threadbare—after months spent saving you from death’s edge. You. Her lover. The center of her garden, her first sip of water every morning. Bleeding. Bleeding. We have to stop the bleeding. She’d almost lost you that night, alternating with Aoi, with anyone, to keep pressure on your wounds, to literally hold you together. Why didn’t you protect them? she’d lashed out at Sanemi, his ashen stare revealing his own melody of grief Look what you’ve left me with. He’d stayed that night, as though sacrificing his sleep could make up for your limp form.

“[y/n]?” she whispers as you stir.

Every day she’s waited for this. Every day she’s waited for you.

“[y/n],” her voice is so soft, so sweet, so hopeful.

So unfamiliar you frown slightly, eyes sensitive as her strange smile comes into focus.

“Who are you?”

Not Shinobu.

Not my love.

Not some sarcastic quip asking how long you’ve been asleep for.

Not even I’m thirsty or some cheeky, mundane request.

Who are you?

WHO ARE YOU.

Shinobu goes to find Aoi. Your face. It’s too much. It’ll never be the same.

No matter where I go, I’m always gonna want you back

It was careless, really. Stupid. He’d known you for what, less than a day? Arriving at dusk, leaving at dawn. And you’d captivated him. He was so used to captivating others — familiar with their blatant murmurings and delightful staring. Was it his hair? His haori? Probably the hair. And the eyes.

“Care to join me for sake?” you casually slip beside him, matching his pace as he strolls downtown.

He accommodates you readily, grateful for your boldness and company on a lonely evening—the calm before the storm. He’s there to slay a demon, after all.

“I do not often drink,” he smiles brightly, “But I would certainly drink with you!”

His gaze glimmers only with curiosity and eagerness. You are not prey.

Of course you aren’t prey. He is. You have no idea, mostly shocked and reeling that he actually accepted your—a mere passerby—invitation, but he takes to you instantly. Perhaps it’s his keen intuition, telling him it’s worth getting to know the stars in your eyes. Perhaps it’s fate. The overwhelming, abrupt sensation—as you talk about why udon is most definitely superior to ramen—that I could be happy with them. As you both begin yawning, you write your address for him on a scrap of washi. He swears to visit. Insists on treating you to a bowl of udon next time.

And watches, heart constricting, as the demon devours your washi.

It really is fate, so unsympathetic and humorless.

How was he to know the stars in your eyes were crossed?

Himself a faint pulse among many.

You tell me I won’t ever change, so I just say nothing

“So that’s it?” you mutter, “No snarky comeback?”

He crosses his arms.

“I pour out my godforsaken soul, and you smirk at me,” you deadpan.

He doesn’t know how to convey the acid in his throat. The fear.

“You’re not unlovable, Sanemi,” you mumble.

He shifts his weight onto his other leg.

“You just don’t love anyone. You just don’t love me.”

He exhales frustratedly.

“Oh don’t give me that crap! I’m having a one sided conversation here. Don’t fucking act like you’re heartbroken.”

Heartbroken? He swallows nervously, and looks at you. Really, deeply, looks at you.

There it is.

The crack in your stare that wasn’t there before. I broke your heart? he flounders inwardly, panicked, anxious Let me fix this — an unyielding surface to anyone else observing him. To you.

“I’m tired, Sanemi,” your voice wobbles.

Let me fix this he strains, tries, fails to overcome the coiling in his gut.

“Tell me you love me,” you whimper, “Tell me you love me too.”

I love you he chokes as your eyes glisten wetly Let me fix this.

“Not even for me, huh,” you murmur, hoarse laughter vibrating cruelly, “You won’t ever change.”

You turn.

And walk away.

I love you he screams.

You pause. Glance at his shrinking figure.

I love you.

Nothing.

Is it tears or just the pouring rain?

“You’re crying,” Giyuu reaches for your dripping hand as rain cascades from a stormy blanket of grey.

“Don’t,” your voice is soft, “Please, Giyuu.”

“This is pathetic,” he growls, water splattering as he shakes his head angrily.

“It can’t be helped,” you shrug simply, doing your best not to shiver.

You’re both soaked to the bone, without any touch to guide you. Without any warmth to share.

“But you feel as I feel?” he demands.

“Giyuu, can we not do this now? Here? It’s freezing.”

His haori settles itself over your shoulders in a heartbeat.

“You can’t keep doing that,” you mumble.

“Doing what?” he taunts you.

Making me love someone I shouldn’t.

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?” he steps closer to you, “I’m doing nothing?” his eyes narrow, glinting edges of sapphire, “You’re the only person I’d do anything for.”

A quiet sob fills the distance between you, “G-giyuu.”

“Why can’t we be together?” he’s fierce, persistent, adoring.

“I can be your friend.”

“I don’t want to be your friend,” he rasps, “I want to be your lover.”

You are my lover you tremble, tugging off his haori, holding it out toward him.

“I want to be your lover,” you confess in stolen breath, “I feel as you feel,” you blink rapidly, eyelashes heavy, clinging, “You know why we can’t be together.”

He knows why.

And he hates it.

Wishes he could hate you too.

He just.

Can’t.

I remember the roses on your shirt, when you told me this would never work

“But they love you,” Tengen insists stubbornly, posture confident, strong, reassuring.

His eyes tell a different story.

Flickering, earnest—too earnest—dimming, narrowing as he realizes.

“How can they love me when they don’t even know me?” you retort, betrayed, misled, cold.

“They do know you!” he’s desperate now, hands clenching and unclenching, “Makio wants to go shopping with you, Suma always asks about how you’re doing, and, and Hina’s been cooking your favorite meals!”

You scoff, tone laden with something so bitter that you both flinch, “I’m glad you’ve been eating my favorite meals with your dirty little secrets.”

“That isn’t fai-”

“You know what isn’t fair?” you interrupt him, seething, “What isn’t fair is discovering you’re already in love. With three other women! Three other woman, who, apparently, are worth your honesty. So what does that make me? I’m not close minded, Tengen, but you lied to me. You’ve made your bed. I hope it never warms you.”

“I love you,” he whispers. Surrenders.

“You don’t love me,” you laugh wryly, “You don’t even trust me,” you begin closing your front door, your vision of his distraught expression growing slimmer and slimmer, “Goodbye, Tengen.”

You slump to the floor, knees huddled into your chest, tears escaping one by one by—all at once. I could’ve loved them too you shudder, grief wracking through your ribcage If you’d just told me, if you’d just loved me from the start.

[robotslenderman]

Soooo only one person actually wanted to see them but it's easier to post here than to Discord so.

Sticking it under cut. Not sure if I was overzealous with the censoring (had my deadname on a few things) or not zealous enough. Anyway, here 'tis!

Seriously, the only reason I coughed up this much money is because I was worried there'd be problems with my card on the other side. Holy shit don't buy your money at the airport FUCK THIS MARKUP, I should have been able to get at LEAST twenty more pounds out of this. O U C H.

After this I couldn't find the fancy lounges I knew Changhi had so I slept on the floor outside a (?jewellery) store near a place called "Heavenly Wang."

The only reason I did not take pictures was because I knew every single Singaporean nearby would know exactly why and I did not want them to judge me.

Second leg sucked more than the first, but at least 1) I had an aisle seat, and 2) the seats were designed so that the people on the other side of me could get up and get around the seats in front of me so I could chill without them disturbing me. Didn't matter bc I didn't sleep fuck all anyway.

Yeah so the Old Operating Theatre had a little chest of drawers where you could leave a note and take a note and I killed myself laughing at "my Arms have fallen off!" so I just had to take it. It was overflowing with notes so I didn't leave one.

and yeah I spent my entire time at London dehydrated because the bottled water was almost as nasty as the tap water.

Tickets to Liverpool, where I picked up a rental car and drove to Beaumaris and had a day-long panic attack because holy fuck British road design is terrifying. Look, I know we like to complain modern roads are designed for cars, but at least they're not designed for horses and carts AAAAAAAAAAAA. (Affectionate [terrified])

Saw Highgate on @nightingaletrash's birthday! :3

As for the timing remark -- I was running early to the station on the way back from Wales, so I took a detour to a factory outlet. It turned out to be more of a detour than I thought, so I only spent a couple of mins there. I saw a jumper I really liked (British clothing is SO COLOURFUL, Aussie clothes are so fucking boring in comparison) but it wasn't in my size.

Good thing I didn't take a few extra minutes to buy it because the train pulled in just as I walked onto the platform... I might have still made it because there was a point where I was waiting for the bus to get to the station, but!

Bulkeley had free parking and when I asked the people at the carpark that charged me six pounds for parking if that was the best place to park for Bulkeley (which I did not know had parking at all) they were like "yeah sure" fuck you sirs.

You can get a two-in-one ticket for the gaol and the courthouse. Somehow I got lost anyway. But both were amazing and I'm glad I went.

The chapel here was SO COOL. The whole castle was, I've never seen a real castle before.

Yeah turns out "split the bill" means "split the bill in half" and not "split the bill according to who ordered what." Nightie was really nice about it considering I sprang that on her on her birthday XD

I initially booked one day then was gonna fuck off to Wales, but decided to add an extra day after I'd already booked, hence the single day stay.

War Rooms were not free but were def. worth it. So was the Abbey. Thought it'd just be a big fancy-ass church, but there were so many tombs, nooks and crannies in there. also dead people.

After the drama of getting my luggage in and out of St Giles I was not lugging it around London on my last day!

Got sick in Singapore and saw the doc; wasn't sure if it'd be responsible to head on the plane back to Syd. Doc said it'd be fine and threw codeine at me.

Holy shit were the flights back so much better than the flights heading over.

From Heathrow. London food is either stupidly expensive or cheaper than Sydney. There is no in between. $24.98 AUD is probably what you'd pay for this in Sydney lmaooooo but nope that's a pound sign.

At some point I picked up some other lady's baggage receipt??? XDDD

Anyway yeah there's the stuff. I've just transferred some videos and pics to my comp so maybe I'll share some of those next.

Anyway I just spent the last hour using washi tape to put receipts, tickets and little cards I'd picked up during the trip in my journal.

Does anyone want to see photos of it?

[therealpussybangs]

Youngblood | S. Rintarō Pt. 2/3

Synopsis: You and Suna had your differences, but this time, they couldn’t be settled

Warnings: ANGST, crying, profanity, mentions of cheating, drinking, hard breakup (not harsh just painful)

Previous/masterlist/next

“Youngblood! Say you want me, say you want me, back in your life..”

Sorry..? That was it? That’s how it’s gonna end huh? Wow. Years worth of love ended in one word; after many arguments of course.

You were still so.. tired, even though it was over. You felt lost often, like you didn’t know what to do now that it was over. It almost felt wrong to go on with your normal life. Like you weren’t allowed to because of the terms it ended on.

Unfortunately, the anxiety of knowing you were on bad terms got to you. You wanted to reach out, clear the air. For yourself, right?

Wrong.

You guys met at a coffee shop on the corner, his choice. It was one you guys used to go to after school on days where you both were struggling. For “old times sake” his words.

Were you doing this for yourself? Yes. But in the wrong way. You see, it was supposed to go smoothly; you’d meet at the coffee shop to talk about the fights, the cheating, and the drinking. Ask him a couple questions, and get the closure you needed. Turns out, closure is a fucking myth.

Once you got there, he explained, that one night when you guys had ‘finally drifted apart to the point of..’ something you didn’t quite remember, he went out drinking to try and clear his head. He wanted to be better for you, but he didn’t know how. He said he got too drunk and woke up in some girls bed. Eventually it became a vicious cycle. He would go to the bar to drink his feelings away, and wake up in bed, just; not his. It was usually the same woman, but sometimes it would be completely random.

You guys barely talked about the fight. You talked about the breakup and the cheating yes, but not in the light you had in mind. You guys ended up talking at the cafe for around 4 hours!! Four. Fucking. Hours. Not that you cared. Right? That seemed to be the question of the hour. “Right??” Second guessing yourself at every turn. “Was my point even justified??” “Am I even allowed to be mad??” “This was just for closure..right??”

But before you could voice these concerns, he asked you.

“Do you think we could continue this, at my place maybe..?”

To say you were stunned would be an understatement. ‘His place..?’ You knew what that meant. He wanted to be yours again, be better. You were trapped, I mean for crying out loud; why not? You had been talking for 4 hours, and the nostalgia was too much. It all hurt too much to not try again.. right?

2 hours later, you end up on his couch watching your favorite show. You didn’t realize how much you missed this. His scent, his warm hugs, his big presence. You missed his deep chuckles and soft touches when you were jumpscared by the show, they were comforting. He really seemed to regret what happened, and he even said he’s been sober since.

You eventually felt yourself slowly succumb to sleep after an eventful day. You had this feeling at the pit of your stomach. This didn’t exactly feel.. right, but it felt like home for the first time since the breakup. You felt like you could finally go on with your day to day life without the anxiety of not knowing what grounds you were on with him.

Sure what he did to you was wrong, but everyone deserves second chances. Right?

A/n: I def projected my problems into this part MUAHAHHAHAHAAA a cliff hanger 😈🙏. No but Fr, what do you think y/n will do? What does she mean ‘until’? What does all the second guessing mean?? What about there only being one lyric?? Until next time folks ;)