#dealing with the acquaintance dynamic of ‘you are way more interested in being my friend than i am in being yours’ and it SUCKSSS

[mars-ipan]

hrgh

[bvckbiter]

Psst psst psst favourite thing to explore in smartwatermagic dynamic?

hm... i think the main thing about this ship that compels me is how each of them deal with their guilt and trauma- it's basically my #1 question to answer when thinking about how they perceive and interact with each other, and from that comes a lot of parallels but also areas where they basically fulfill each other's lack/need.

i think annabeth in particular is a very good example of this; it's well-established in canon that she's faced a lifetime of her most beloved people letting her down (frederick and luke), abandoning her (athena), or ultimately turning her away for something they think is for the better (thalia). this is why she's very territorial of the people she considers as hers, as per chiron, and percy slots in very nicely into that gap with his (purported) flaw of personal loyalty. percy i think with his very human upbringing is a cornerstone for annabeth continuing to believe in family and love.

so you have percy kind of being there to pick annabeth up after the Luke Betrayal (yes, luke is an inextricable pivoting point in this relationship). alabaster as the only remaining living demigod still loyal to the TA's cause throws an interesting wrench in the percabeth dynamic, because if you hc that alabaster was in camp for a reasonably long time and was at some point acquainted/friends with annabeth, then you can have this shred of annabeth's pre-Luke Betrayal past coming back to haunt her, and her having to decide if alabaster's still worth clinging onto. i can imagine annabeth being unable to help herself and getting drawn to al one way or the other, especially with her mindset that her perfect world/life is hers to make. plus also in general the two of them getting more closure about Why Luke Was Like That lmao

percy on the other hand is Fighting His Own Demons because plainly put, i think he's the type of person that tries to ignore problems for as long as he can, especially if he knows that he's the root of the problem (see: Rachel Elizabeth Dare). not out of cowardice, but more of a "this (referring to himself) should not even be a matter thats wasted time on, it (referring to himself) should fix itself." so where he might be anxious over annabaster is also complicated by thoughts of "do i have the right to feel this way, i should try to be understanding." and then on top of that of course is the righteous rage he'd feel for al and his situation... and we all know percy is very protective of people he feels responsible for. (it's an interesting complementary to annabeth's personal/emotional possessiveness wink wink)

meanwhile al here is just. struggling. at large he naturally blames the olympians for his situation; but he's also putting a lot of pressure on himself for failing expectations. he's angry about his exile but also he doesn't treat himself well, almost like a method of self-flagellation. in a weird way, i also think that the expectations he perceives of himself as having failed are almost... imaginary? or exaggerated, because we know from Son of Magic that hecate cares about him simply because he is her son, regardless of what he has accomplished or failed. basically i love alabaster making his internal turmoil more complicated than it really is/has to be; and what better way to self-flagellate into the void of confusion by embracing two of olympus' foremost heroes when they offer it lolololol

this was a longer post than i expected, but oml this was a difficult yet very interesting ask to tackle. smartwatermagic's dynamic is very very very complicated and i dont think i could ever write enough words about it.

[ryuichirou]

I'm back with my GloMas ask. By the way I love the word GloMas: it's like Christmas but more theatrical and angsty, and at the end of all the celebration, instead of getting presents, you end up with less stuff than before (no need to check Ruggie's luggage, officer. I can assure there's nothing interesting there).

On to the question, which is partially about Ruggie. This event has brought to light a new interesting dynamic that I hadn't really considered before, with the Ruggie/Jamil team up. It's nice to see Jamil be himself (i.e. a menace) more unapologetically than usual. I don't really ship them as a "couple", but I definetely see their appeal as potential "acquaintances-with-benefits". And I bet Ruggie would be happy to hear less grumbling when he decides to pay a visit to the rich boys Scarabia dorm. Basically, I'm curious to know if you guys have any thoughts about these two, both related to the event and in general!

Anon!! Sorry for the late reply, and let me go grab that loud mic I used a couple of days ago once again and tell you.

YES. These two. These two are very good together.

For the most part I want to just yell YES at everything you’ve said because you’ve honestly nailed it. Glorious Masquerade (with its Christmas-like Glomas glory..) was the first event we’d seen (even before we watched the main story), so Jamil and Ruggie’s unexpected chemistry is something that we have in mind at all times lol

It really feels like they can be themselves around each other, which is exactly what they said, and honestly these two out of the entire cast really deserved it. What they also deserved is to have someone to complain about the harsh realities of serving to capricious princes (Kalim isn’t a prince but) who are unreasonable and frankly stupid at times. Just imagine THE LEVELS OF PETTY AND TIRED VENTING, their venting sessions could be the best.

I don’t know if you wanted any headcanons with them, but since we’re at it, might as well drop some. These are mostly sfw, but the last one kind of isn’t lol

They knew that they might be a good match even before the Glorious Masquerade but never really had a chance to hang out before that. And during the event, to them it felt like they’ve been having telepathic dialogues for ages, and now finally they get to actually chat. They’re on the same page TO SUCH A DEGREE it’s actually stupid.

Even after the event, even though both Ruggie and Jamil went back to being super busy, they kept in touch. Sometimes they text each other, sometimes they meet simply to VENT. Having another person who is done of everyone’s bullshit in this stupid school is a blessing. They also talk about other stuff, like cooking and hobbies and even scheming and such, but their main topic is still “wow I hate these people”.

What they find the most comforting about each other is the fact that they know they are not really friends, but they also don’t have much to gain from each other, so it’s not like they should expect a backstab at any point. It’s actually pretty rare for Jamil to be this relaxed like he is when he is around Ruggie.

They don’t have sex regularly, but they did it once during the Masquerade event and at least once when they came back to the NRC. Both of them aren’t too into sex, otherwise it probably would have happened more often. Ruggie is actually a much better option to have this “acquaintances-with-benefits” deal than Azul, because with Ruggie Jamil can be sure there won’t be any feelings attached to it: they’ll help each other out and will be on their merry way…

[clarythericebot]

On the friendships in Emma M. Lion

The way Emma M. Lion deals with friends is so delightful and makes me so happy. My thoughts are running around, so let me try to concretize it:

I appreciate that she has friends from her past. Her existence doesn't start at the beginning of the novel, and while portraying the growth of a relationship from conception is a valid writer choice to do to get readers very invested, I appreciate that Emma has vibrant friendships that spring from the rich life she's already lived before our own acquaintance with her begins.

She's friends with family. She's affectionate towards her older cousin, Arabella, and while there doesn't seem to be Affection with her aunt, it's pretty clear that her aunt is looking out for her. (I appreciate this because I feel like there is a strict divide between friends and family in many of the stories I read, and this one highlights that you can have fun relationships with your kin.)

The friends from her past aren't introduced all at once. Definitely keeps things from being overwhelming. But more than that--we can see how, even in their absence, her friends affect Emma. She loves and thinks fondly of them. So, by the time they're officially introduced, you love and are fond of them too.

Her past relationships grow and change. For example, Emma enters an event and encounters her childhood nemesis, who she remembers hating and who hated her. But he's grown up, and after a little bit of reluctance, Emma accepts the fact and rejoices in it.

It's very refreshing that the chemistry that Emma has with multiple male friends doesn't mean her swooning over them or the narrative pushing a romantic arc. I mean, I love romantic arcs, and I believe that we'll probably get one for Emma in the future. But it's impressive to me that whichever potential love interest actually comes forward (and it's impressive to me that I can't say with certainty which one will--as of the beginning of the third book, there's no one male character that is marked out as Emma's One True Love), nothing supercedes that they're all interesting characters that have genuine and interesting relationships with Emma, and bring out different sides of her. In other words, I love that the writer doesn't skimp on the friends part of friends to lovers.

Emma doesn't have 'a group of friends'. She has friends from different contexts in her life. Can I just say how marvelous and lovely this is? I don't know, I think modern stories romanticize One True Group of Friends almost as much as One True Love. Emma doesn't have a specific pack of people that all have relationships to one another. She's friends with her maid, her cousins, childhood people she interacted with, someone she's met in a ball, her tenant, her vicar, her schoolmates, and the people she's encountered in St Crispian's. Sometimes these people intersect. Sometimes they don't. Emma doesn't feel the need to get them together in one place and she sometimes outright states she doesn't want them to, considering how markedly different those characters are. But the fact that Emma can be friends with this fun diversity of people is very cool.

She makes friends with her friends' friends and it introduces interesting new dynamics. Like, I just said that it's cool that Emma has disparate friendships, but it is also interesting when a new friend provides insight to aspects of an old one's life Emma didn't know. (Spoiler Alert: I'm talking about Mary and Jack. The pair are fascinating, and his hints that there's something going on with Mary intrigue me.)

[ohii-san]

yes tell us about eihiyo!!!!!

folds hands okay so . to me it's very fundamental that you keep in mind eichi and hiyori were childhood friends and they've known each other likely longer than keito has known eichi and i DON'T KNOW WHY THEY KEEP FUCKING DISREGARDING IT I HATE AKIRA anyway . i'll put it under the cut i know i am very rambly

edit; i hit the image limit i am not normal

so starting with checkmate which is translated by dreamwidth user shivalries but i have a screenshot of the wiki here no i don't how the fuck am i supposed to find it it's so far back in my gallery oh my god OH I GOT IT

it's like never stated when eihiyo meets but it's Obviously fairly young because of the way they refer to each other . i have insane bias so i put them as like toddler friends but realistically they may have met shortly before nagisa came into the tomoe family, since it's stated that the foundation is falling as of ! era meaning they were far more likely to have met years prior in its peak .

SO . let's look at what eichi says here . he says he's similar to hiyori by admitting it would be like looking at himself, and this is a sentiment they both repeat in other stories; i haven't read altered but i am so sure it probably echoes this . he also knows hiyori well enough to understand that they're not particularly amicable, nor is hiyori someone who's easy to deal with when he doesn't fancy it . additionally, in pretty mission, we get these interactions;

it's very likely the two of them attended social gatherings for high society families, which would also perhaps be where hiyori could vaguely know the himemiya family from aside from word of mouth ( it's established in a hiyori side story from ! that he has met tori before, but i believe tori says it was during his time with exfine ? )

we also get to see, in altered, that eichi is more than capable of courtesy and awareness of hiyori's false behaviors . he also says here that they've known each other a long time 🧐 fascinating . okay then . so they mutually understand one another and can't lie to each other ? sounds like something people in a FORMER RELATIONSHIP WOULD SAY !!!!!!! congrats to eichi for being the most divorced nineteen year old in the world

moving on . sorry for the poor image quality i combined two screenshots so i could add the altered one since i NEED people to see it

moving onto summer live which ummm was done by kotofucius ( a long inactive tl :( hope they're okay ) right here, but i have screenshots from the wiki saved so it's what you get lol ❤️ anyway hiyori states it's been a long time since he's seen eichi, and we know this is after the war so we can assume hiyori and eichi more or less fell out after hiyori transferred to reimei . tsumugi states ( in a story i can't recall ? may be ss ) that he keeps in contact with hiyori and nagisa, and that ibara ( <- i believe he says "that kid" or something though, referring to nagisa's roommate and partner, who is ibara ) has helped nagisa grow as a person etc etc so Why did hiyori ghost eichi 🧐 but it's easy enough to understand .

i accidentally grabbed so many screenshots but wonder game gives us a decent glimpse into their dynamic too .

i put them all side by side on mobile to save space a little but the gist of this is that eichi is . very .. aware ? of hiyori's personality and mannerisms, and feels comfortable calling them out . hiyori is someone who canonically wears a facade so imo it's very interesting that eichi calls his bluffs, points out his flaws, etc without much thought at all . they're obviously close and well acquainted no matter how much they appear to hate one another .

we see it later in summer live too, he advises hokuto almost nonstop for the trickstar/eve meeting because he understands hiyori and grasps quite well that he's difficult when he wants to be, which is exactly how he ends up acting with hokuto; really the only reason they get through that meeting is eichi's guidance and hokuto getting pissed off enough to get hiyori to respect him . a tiny bit .

also, in wonder game again, we get to see the fact that hiyori is eventually dedicated to eichi's cause despite hating him . in my opinion this is hiyori deflecting; i believe they're actually much closer than either of them admit in ! era stories ( which is Basically all i've referenced so far ), and their !! banter is definitely meant to be read as far more playful

hiyori acknowledges eichi's dedication and seems to admire it, and also shut up look at what hiyori says in summer live you will not believe this shit

?!?!?!?!?! BUT YOU PERFORM WITH EICHI AND WORK ALONGSIDE HIM . YOU DON'T HATE HIM YOU BIG BITCH BABY JESUS CHRIST !!!! ohhh my god they're so insufferable okay . i'm running out of intelligent thought but i hope you now understand that eichi and hiyori do definitely respect one another, they work well together, i believe hiyori had a crush on eichi as a child and they ( like reichi ) have insane divorced energy . their fights in !! are much more tame compared to them outright saying "i hate you" HAHAH . going back to that second pretty mission screenshot ( as i said at the top, i hit the image limit ), you can definitely read it in a way more amicable teasing kind of way . i would also like to give a shoutout to this white brim moment where hiyori smacks eichi for pretending to die and traumatizing tori . real exes behavior idk personally i wouldn't assault people i wasn't close with HAHAH i also want to mention *this* white brim moment where eichi says that hiyori has been a maid, presumably worn a maid dress also ( for him ?!?!? ) before . it's probably a reference to them playing as children but i am losing my goddamn mind at the idea of like 15/16 year olds eihiyo fucking around and making a bet which ends with hiyori serving eichi .

okay i need to shut up this has been so much please read white brim ( i haven't even read it in full ) and wonder game THANK YOU FOR LISTENING PLEASE SEE MY VISION I SPENT AN HOUR TYPING ALL OF THIS AND GATHERING SCREENSHOTS

[petrichoraline]

SLEEPOVER SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳

what are your top 5 japanese BLs?

tell me about a fond memory or your comfort food (or both!!!!!)

[I LOVE YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[LOVE YOU TOO MY SWEETESTTTTT💗💞💕💖💓💗]

these are suchh good questions omg okay

i suck at ranking things and don't enjoy it one bit because i don't do faves, im too fluid in my tastes and can't ever pick criteria but! let's try in no particular order

1. Kieta Hatsukoi

i think im in the habit of dropping things from my fave lists as time goes by and especially if they're well beloved by other people like "okay then I'll focus on this less talked about thing, my bby seems to be getting enough attention"; how and why I work that way im not sure but I do and by that logic kieta hatsukoi should not be on my list but it's an honorary member - I've watched it twice (with maybe a bit of skipping which is still a lot cause I don't really do rewatches) and I've read most of the manga. it's just so..easy to like, for a lack of a better phrase. it's inoffensive and suited to be a comfort piece of media in whichever form you decide to enjoy it (and it'd make an amazing anime, i guarantee people would be all over it)

the live adaptation also takes the events of the manga and mixes them around big time but it still makes sense and it keeps you a bit more on your toes when consuming the other version, whether you watch the show or read the manga first

it's also a show I've recommended passionately and I successfully made my then new acquaintance watch which I'm a bit smug about lmao

sweet characters, supportive friends, funny, light and warm 💖

2. The End of the World With You

*indescribable screeches*

this showwww, i dont know if i can call it a fave since i havent once come back to it, i dont feel the need to go watch compilations of my guys or anything and i acknowledge there were some elements i found a bit lacking but! it's amazing. idc, this show gave me proper complex relationship where i still end up rooting for a couple of people who were toxic towards each other and did nootttt know how to handle a relationship; the dynamic is compelling, the premise is interesting enough, there are heavy scenes and plot points but it is embedded with hope

it also helped me bond a bit with a mutual i like <3

i just am thankful for it existing out there in the world, it served fucked up relationship (that i root for wholeheartedly), sexy times, found family, amazing acting and it didnt have most of the chaos an apocalyptic piece would usually be dealing with

3. BL Drama no Shuen ni Narimashita: Crank Up Hen

listen. we're getting some pretty good jbls this year but i said this will be jbl of the year and i still think it's a solid nominee.

the romance is tooth-achingly sweet. the leads are adorable. the acting is perfect and manages to deliver the comedy very well. it's cute, it's fun, it knows exactly what it wants to achieve and works with its timeframe to do it. the side characters do not affect the plot negatively, the hurdles the couple needs to overcome do not feel excessive. if you happen to yell at them for being silly, it's lovingly. also we got more chemistry than i expected! and it was really good. it also set up an example for ''japanese actors working on bls'' (found the things like shooting promos and the portrayed bts process really fun) so now watching 25 ji Ajisaka de i can't help but think of this show

4. Utsukushii Kare

my relationship with this show suffers from the "enough people love it" thing as well, i think i rewatched it or skipped through the first season? and i enjoyed the second one as well but honestly it feels not only as if enough people love it but that they love it and get it way better than i do. i didnt watch the movie out of fear of having to say bye to my guys but i also feel more disconnected from it now. im sure its still a gem of a movie and im so so happy we got two seasons and a movie, the show and the cast deserve it!!

there is just so much beauty in their yearning for each other and the misunderstandings, the downright stupid decisions they make..they all just work in making this a neat story of love that blooms from something different, from worship and the desire to be seen and to be held and to be possesed. they're wild, i love them

5. Kinou Nani Tabeta?

this show i watched years before i got into bl and i didn't even know it was a bl when i started it lol, i was like "ohhh, theyre a couple? cool"

i rewatched the first season, watched the special and the movie, started the second season and kinda got stuck there, again with hte "i dont want to let them go"..and now ive lost momentum and ive got basically a whole season ahead (i started it when it was airing 😭)

these two love each other so much and support each other in every way that matters, my heart melts at every sweet gesture and even though the show portrays some real struggles they have to deal with, its still a very funny and light show. the best word to describe it would be "charming" - you see this couple's everyday life, you see how they came to be and what challenges they face, how they overcome them and you're left with no doubt in your mind they will grow old together, well loved and taken care of

now I wanted ti turn this into a top 10 but I felt like I was being disingenuous cause I can't overcome my need to talk about underrated shows rather than pick my faves..I can't make a faves list without turning it into a diverse recommendation list so I'll just. stop here.

favourite food.. faves again.. hahah

a fond memory involving food.. preparing food the whole day before my birthday (maybe my seventeenth?) - sushi, spring rolls, i think I made dessert too? and then having picnic with my friends who were all in awe and praising me. I felt very appreciated and truly celebrated and it was a fun party 💖

[johannwolfgangvongoethe]

Hello valued mutual-in-law (I am the twitter mutual of Matt’s whose friend is long term essaying with him over curiouscat, for context); I just wanted to say I just read your writing on disability within enstars you linked in reply to one of the curiouscat exchanges (which I’ve been reading bc I like seeing what both people involved have to say) + the post about guardianship re: the Merus that it linked to. Just wanted to say thanks for writing it all because it was really insightful — particularly the Sakuma segment, because I’m not very well-versed on the two of them and especially not with Rei, who I’m mostly acquainted to through being a casual enjoyer of the oddballs’ group dynamic, as well as a 2winkP (the latter of which provides sort of complicated feelings on him based on Setsubun & its aftermath, or general lack thereof that’s only really brought up in Nightclub from what i’ve seen do far;;). Like I did know to a basic degree about the Wagahai & Orei selves being personas but the detail in which you went into them + the way his disability affects him & his relationship with Ritsu really gave me some new insight on him & a motivation to learn more up on him.

Tldr; I enjoyed your thoughts and writings on the mixed bag of disability representation in enstars, thank you for writing all that it was nice insight, and it helped me understand the Sakumas — particularly Rei — better. Good posts op

HIIII holy shit, thank you so much for reading them. JUST HOW FAST WERE YOU.... i am really happy to hear you liked them!!! its just a lot of rambling but i love to yap + i love when others yap and it introduces me to a new perspective...... in my mind were holding hands and dancing in a meadow <:)

genuinely, i think no one can be immune to the oddballs, right. theyre just good. see.... my partner is a shuP and my bestie is a natsumeP and matt is a wawaP and i am a rei guy by necessity and ..... THIS IS HOW I KNOW NOTHIONG ABOUT KANATA.... i feel like often orienting oneself around enstars as a series is extremely about picking like a handful of charas to major in and knowing people who are into everyone else so you experience enough secondhand lore LOL

i extremely get you though, rei is not sympathetic. i am on pc but what i mean is 2winkP handshake emoji kogaP = Fuck That Guy

i could talk about rei (and ritsu for that matter. tho i havent read that much about him) in the context of disability forever.... and it feels important because it is an angle that discussion about him is just EXTREMELY lacking. it often feels like barely anyone bothers to think about how much being ill shapes his person, his relationships, his job, his actions.... and i cant really blame people either because they probably havent made the necessary experiences to really internalize how big of a deal that is...

and narratively..... there is a big trend of characters being very lenient with him and basically thanking him for being.... extraordinarily condescending, nosy, emotionally unavailable, and actively a danger for everyone involved. the worst examples that instantly come to mind for me are repayfes, setsubun (as you mentioned), and dont even get me started on hidden beast.

+ often hes some sort of deus ex machina plot device for lazy writing and its SO obnoxious.

setsubun specifically is so weird because i understand and support his weird cartoon villain act (as in, its engaging to read and an interesting manifestation of his issues) and obviously i LOVE the drama of characters being unwell and causing issues for others that way... conflict is great... but the way the twins react to it purely positively at the end is just a really disappointing. like i dont expect them to truly nail that hinata almost died an hour ago but come on. (ig sandstorm tries to pick up there....) also sort of why i never brought anything in there about being "monstrous" and how "monsters are created" up in my disability post.... really really fits the topic and a lot of it is coming from the horses (reis) mouth but the context hinata and yuta experience it in is just an entirely different one. hm....

its sort of a similar deal with himeru, right. narratively i am disappointed. they dont get chewed out by the people i want. and hes doing evil shit. but then i see him and i go :( thats my funny menhera man.......

[bazzybelle]

Trope Grading

Omg I kept seeing this on my dashboard and I was hoping to get tagged! Thank you @seiya-starsniper for tagging me, love! :D

Ok so, I'm not picky at all when it comes to tropes and fun things to write and read, so expect most of these to be in the positive range. Also, slight disclaimer, no one's gonna like the same things. What I'm obsessed with may not work for others and that's OK!

Rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 - don't care either way

+10 -> very enticed

nope -> if it's a hard no and you'd never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you'd insta click out of the fic if it wasn't tagged

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it's conditional.

Age gap: +3

So I'm usually not a fan of large age gaps. I find them rather squicky irl, and I'm not very keen on clicking fics that contain them. That being said, if I happen to read a summary that sounds interesting to me, or if the fic is by a writer I enjoy, I'll most likely read it.

I will most likely not write anything involving age gap though, unless a friend asks me to.

Codependency: +5

I like fics that start out this way. Where the two people cannot function without the other. However, if this leads to them finding independence WHILE still needing the person in their life, yesssssss! Having a character learning to be happy on their own and on their own terms is the good shit for me.

That being said, both Dreamling and SnowBaz have some of the most co-dependant fuckers I've seen. They're so much fun to write though. :D

Obsession/Possessiveness, jealousy: +5

This depends on the level of intensity, and whether it becomes toxic or not. I will not read a fic that involves the main pairing being abusive towards each other. If it becomes dark towards each other, I'm clicking out. That being said, the "No one gets to touch you, but me" or "No one gets to have dirty thoughts of you" shit is so fucking GOOD.

Both Dreamling and SnowBaz have this shit and I eat it up every single time.

And yes, I will GLADLY write this. No questions asked.

Opposites (grumpy/sunshine etc): +10

Oh yesssss!!!! Love love love this trope! It's so much fun to read how different authors decide to tackle this. Will the dark one find reasons to be sunshiny? Will the sunshiny one learn how to cope with darkness as it comes and goes? How does their dynamic work? How do they deal with other people? So many possibilities! Love it!

Enemies to lovers, Enemies with benefits: +50

Hi, hello! This is my JAM. I think every major fandom I've been a part of had some sort of pairing like this, and each one was handled with perfection. Though Dreamling is less Enemies to Lovers, and more Acquaintances to Friends to HOPEFULLY LOVERS.

However, I also live in the Carry On fandom, and my fam from there will tell you that Simon and Baz are perfect Enemies to Lovers! It's just such a fun trope to see tow people going from absolutely HATING each other, to being madly in love.

They DO say that there is a fine line between love and hate.

Friends with benefits: +5

This can be a REALLY fun trope to play around with. I haven't read many fics where they strictly stay as fuck buddies. Normally, they always progress to being in a relationship after developing FEELINGS. I would like to read a fic where they stay strictly platonic, and are happy staying as fuck buddies. Or maybe one ends up in a relationship and it's just... fine.

Sex to feelings: +5

See, this is what the FWB usually ends up becoming. So I'm marking it the same as the FWB. All of the FWB fics I've read eventually end up becoming this. Same with the Enemies with Benefits. Almost always, it ends up with one or both the characters developing feelings.

And I'm pretty happy with that, but it's gotta have a good plot attached to it as well.

Fake dating/relationship: +8

Ohhhh yes! I love a good fake dating story. The underlying angst over one loving the other (because it ALWAYS happens) coupled with the fear of being Found Out is so perfect.

Then you have the moment when Everything Is Revealed, and so you get more angst and pining until the eventual resolution.

Friends to lovers: +50

The amount of love I feel for the Enemies to Lovers is equal to the love I feel for Friends to Lovers. Enemies to Lovers is hot and heavy and good for writing those intense feelings growing into something positive. With Friends to Lovers, it's a bit of a slower burn, but nice because your characters already have a good relationship. But oh no... one wants something different. What if their friend doesn't feel the same? What if it ruins everything?

Dreamling fandom has done this SO WELL.

Found Family: +5

YESSSSSSS! Ok look, if it's the only trope in the fic, then I'll probably skip it, unless it's got a really compelling plot attached to it. I am such a sucker for found family though. Where you have a rag tag group of outcasts and misfits who find comfort and love amongst each other... Yes, give me all of that.

Hurt/Comfort: +10000000000000000000

THIS IS MY ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE TROPE! BAR NONE! END OF STORY!

The fucking AAAAAAANGST with one partner being hurt and the stress with wondering if they'll be ok and be reunited with their partner.

Then the soothing balm that comfort provides... Ughhhhh yes. Give me that shit NOW.

Let it known, that I will ONLY read a hurt/whump fic, if there is AMPLE comfort as well. Beat up your characters, but give them hugs and tea and bandaids after.

Love Triangle: -10

I am NOT a big fan of love triangles. Ok well... that depends. If it's an ACTUAL love triangle, where all three people have feelings for each other, I can get onboard. I have recently found that I really like reading poly fics.

However, if it's the type of bullshit where one person has two people fighting over them... it's a no for me. I'm not a fan of Love Angles (because that's what they are).

Poly, open relationships: +8

You know. I never really thought I'd end up liking poly ships as much as I do. It started when I got into AtLA, and saw a really well-written Zuko/Sokka/Suki fic. The writer just really convinced me that they all genuinely loved each other.

I guess it comes down to how well the author can convince me that they all have feelings for each other and are in a respectful relationship.

Convince me that no one is being mistreated and I'm down for reading your poly/open fic. :)

We all have two hands after all.

Mistaken/hidden identity: +1

I'm very meh with this trope. I don't know, it doesn't interest me as much as other tropes do. I mean, if you've got a good spy fic where one has to hide who they are on fear of death, I can vibe with that. If the stakes are raised, I can get on board with it. :)

Monsterfucking: +50

My favourite movie as a kid was Beauty and the Beast. I was UPSET when he changed into a prince.

I was obsessed with Twilight as a teen.

HI CARRY ON FANDOM!!!!

Yes, I am ALL for monster fucking. Go fucking WILD!

Pregnancy: +5

I'm not a fan of writing out the whole process of pregnancy, because frankly it terrifies me. But I do love the idea of unexpected pregnancy and kid-fics. They can be a lot of fun :)

Second Chance: +10

I am currently writing a medical second chance fic. And I am having so much fun writing it. I love second chance fics. Sometimes, people who are supposed to be together aren't together at the right time. Sometimes people need to grow before they're ready to be together.

The slow coming back to feelings after time is so sweet to read. Are the feelings still there after time has passed? Is it too late for us? Did we miss our shot? Is it worth jumping into love at this time?

Slowburn: +10000000000

Yesssssssssssss! Drag that shit out. Have the relationship develop slowwwwwwwwlyyyyyyyyy. Give me missed opportunities, and interrupted kisses. Give me pining and second thoughts, and uncertainty. Give me months of going back and forth.

Give me the Oh... OH moment!

Soulmates: +10

Soulmates are so fucking fun! And I have read so many good soulmate fics (heck, I even WROTE one). There are so many different ways you can portray two people being soulmates. And I'm not just talking about the way it presents, but also the type of soulmate. The fic I wrote had platonic soulmates. Soulmates who are connected and love each other but it isn't romantic. They're just each other's Person.

I would love to see this concept explored more (the fic I wrote had them as background characters), as well as other types of soulmates. Can you have familial soulmates? Sexual soulmates? Purely romantic soulmates? Friendly soulmates? Multiple soulmates? There are so many ways to play with this trope!

Tagging gently: @carryonsimoncarryonbaz @f-ing-ruthless-baz @amywaterwings @namistrella @ninemagicks @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @yellobb @windsweptinred @facewithoutheart @aristocratic-otter @ic3-que3n @artsyunderstudy @j-nipper-95 @messofthejess @mentallyinvernation @spockandthings @mallory-x @nausikaaa @quellawrites @thranduilland @valiantstarlights

[julianobungus]

Could you talk about which are your absolute favorite TOH ships and why you like them? I find your takes very interesting and it's so cool that you ship so many rare pairs!

That I can do! Thanks a bunch~! I just enjoy coming up with and seeing different dynamics, and some stick more than others or just appeal to me personally.

Luzador (Luz/Alador): I like this one for a couple reasons. Firstly and superficially, I think they look hot together (y'know, big burly man and lithe petite woman), so they have nice physical chemistry. Secondly, I feel like they have pretty similar/convergent personalities, both being socially-handicapped nerds who are considered deviant and who stand out in some way. I feel like they'd bond over that. I also feel like they'd have a fair bit of shared pain as well - with Luz being ostracised for being 'weird', as well as losing her father, and Alador being emotionally abused by Odalia and feeling guilt for messing up as a father because of her.

Huntleb(Hunter/Caleb): This one may be a little out of left field, but it appeals to me too. I've been seeing a few artworks and talk of it, so that's more or less swayed me hehe. To me, Hunter and Caleb are dadson/selfcest coded, bringing in the best of both worlds and being all the spicier for it. I feel like they'd get along well, with Caleb feeling a sense of duty to protect this poor, abused young man, and Hunter projecting onto him as the closest thing he has to a father figure. Couple that with the fact that Hunter doesn't know how to healthily process and disentangle romantic and familial feelings, and how Caleb has been repressed sexually because of his religious upbringing, and you have two young men giving in to their urges.

BumpEda (Bump/Eda): Okay, so hear me out. These two were already acquaintances in canon and actually got along quite well (to a degree at least, hehe). I'd imagine that Eda confided in Bump about the curse and what was going on with her family life, so I feel like he would have been a good confidante. A good reason for strong feelings to develop. And he even kept the Owl House's location a secret! Now that they're both adults, I'd imagine they have more time and confidence to explore the feelings they have toward one another, with what was once platonic friendship becoming something romantic~

We can't forget Lunter, which is definitely up here as one of my favourites. Even in canon they get along so well! I swear to God, if Amity was out of the picture they'd get together and it'd probably work! There's also the themes and symbolism behind it - the parallels to Caleb and Evelyn for example. It's all so juicy.

Beluz makes me pretty happy too. I'm a sucker for hero/villain ships just because of an 'opposites attract' type deal. Philip/Belos is devoted to Luz, and she needs a big strong man who probably understands her better than *anyone else*, or is at least willing to understand her (same vein as Luzador then, hehe).

Guslow (Gus/Willow): So sweet it makes me sick. Classic childhood friends blossoming into sweethearts. There's only a two-year age gap so I don't really know why this is considered proship (if it even is?). They just slot so neatly together: taller buff GF and short meek boyfriend - i.e., that size difference we all crave.

Camiluz (Camila/Luz): If there was another person beside Alador, Philip, and Hunter who would truly understand Luz, it's her own mother. Despite her mistakes, Camila thinks the world of her Mija and wants her to be as comfy as possible. I like to imagine that they discovered their feelings for each other after Luz came home, and have both just accepted the fact that they're now mother-daughter-girlfriends! Despite how much happier they are together, they feel a little bit of shame because they wonder what Manny would have thought of it.

Belunter (Luz/Hunter/Belos): Listen. Belos loves these two so much. They both remind him of Caleb and one of them is a beautiful human girl. He cherishes them even if they don't feel the same way. While you can definitely ponder the darker/dead-dove aspects this would all imply (of which there are aplenty), I'm a sensitive wee soul so I tend to focus on the soft stuff (with only some aspects of DD). I'm still formulating in my head the proper dynamics to fit these three, but trust me: they have all the more reason to love each other. Hunter was raised by him and has an unhealthy view on relationships; Luz has been ostracised for much of her life and is desperate for the company of those who understand and sympathise with her, and Belos? He's obsessed with them.

Lastly, I've recently been thinking of Amity/Edric. Writing those headcanons for them earlier (thanks to the anon who suggested them, btw) has made me a little gaga over them. It's a new and interesting idea/dynamic to me~!

[jekyllhyde]

can you tell me about harvey dent :-)

oh my beautiful wife with a disorder. im gonna talk about him under the cut. potentially ableism warning jic?

talking about him in his actual source: its very interesting to see the different reasons given to harvey for "becoming evil", i would say they usually fall into the categories of: he has DID, he has OCD, he has schizophrenia or psychosis, he was already fucked up and that was his last straw, he was good but the attack was his last straw.

personally, as much as i would normally dislike giving an evil person a stigmatized disorder i do prefer when the writers give him DID &/or OCD (as a DID & OCD haver) over him just deciding to become evil? especially if it feels like harv isn't an "evil alter" so much as more invested in himself and being willing to do more fucked up things to help himself. particularly i think batman the animated series did his origins best but thats not a controversial take by any means. in my own personal desires i wish he wasn't just a villain and more of a morally gray figure which would make him being mentally ill feel less...bad... but ultimately they wont change that and will keep him going back and forth on his recovery because DC hates change

in general i think the ones that play with bruce and harvey having some prior relationship (work or genuine friendship) are the best because it gives the character a lot more tragedy. i dont remember which specific comic this is but i know one of them established them as childhood friends which controversially im not the biggest fan of? i think i enjoy it more when they became acquainted in adulthood it feels more tragic in some way. im honestly surprised DC doesn't utilize the character more considering how much drama they can do with him and bruce but i also dont want them to use him more because i dont trust most of the writers </3

speaking about him on an F/O level: thinking about him learning to love again is very nice because hes fairly often written as believing he is no longer lovable after becoming two face, whether due to his facial difference or due to the existence of other parts/alters. my s/i leon used to be 1 person but was split into two people which i think is a very interesting dynamic with harvey since they both have to deal with the concept of having more than one "self" (though there's a physically separate version of leon as opposed to just dissociative barriers). i think he'd especially be able to bond over the fact that leon was in some sort of way made to be the "bad one", taking on the traits associated with deviance, which means they both struggle with feeling like they dont have the control to choose to do the right thing.

im in love with harvey and if i think about him too long i get emotional but <33333

[tenok]

It's interesting thought because it's really complicated . It's not like Aziraphale interacts with culture only though food — he collect books, he take classes, he owns business, he's part of clubs and societies and he actually dress pretty fashionable and proper, just out of time. He also talks to people, from costumers to neighbors, and have life long acquaintances, as we see with Maggie for example (and we doesn't see Crowley interact with humans much outside of work). I think the difference is more that Aziraphale gets invested deep, and with his angelic lifespan it means like really deep. He likes his magic tricks since ancient Egypt, he wore same tunic for thousands of years, he can spend lifetimes learning one language, and if he befriends someone he will look after their kids and nieces, etc. So when he finds one style he likes? He stucks with it until he gets bored. But humans can't live like this, they change much faster, so give him ten years and he's out of place. Same with social norms: he was living alongside humans for thousands years, and you can imagine how fast things changed in last century alone. What means to be polite and friendly and what acceptable or not and how do you greet and how do you show condolences, even if he was good at picking social clues and empathy (and he's not! My boy is clearly autistic!) it would be hard to adapt to the new trends all the time. He thinks he figured out how humans work for now, he looks up and see that while he was thinking the norms changed again and he's again looks awkward.

(I have a lot of thoughts about Edinburgh minisode, most of it about how Gaiman did us all dirty with badly adapting great line from book to absolutely different context in show, but the key points is that it was a complicate situation and Aziraphale did his best in navigating it as soon as he could. It's not like he wasn't aware of poor people struggles at all, and he offered different solutions that just didn't work there for one reason or another, and part of it is that there's industrial revolution happening, babe, and social dynamics do changed suddenly)

Now, for the Crowley imperative is to be *cool*. It's important for his work, it's important for his self image, it's important so he will impress Aziraphale. And he does look cool, enough so in hell they hates him but loves him, oh look at this Crowley in his cool glasses and swaying hips, he thinks he's so better than we. So he doesn't dive deep, he look at trends. How the coolest asshole of this decade looks? There, he will miracle whole outfit and won't think twice of it (I think it's literally the reason why he was in crown in Rome even if it's not street wear of that time). He owns almost to none material things and most of them are markers of his coolness (Bentley, in book it was his watch, pen and computer, all made specifically to be *cool*, again, and he doesn't even used them) (I also don't remember him paying rent, but I may be wrong, I was under impression that his flat was given to Shax the same way Metatron gave bookshop to Muriel, as "hell's office on earth"). He also project his persona to other people fairly well, so he "gets a reputation" (as with nazis in 1941 or with gang in 1967), he probably great at lying and adapting at spot, can easily pick clues even if he doesn't know context. And he's interested in modern stuff, where's Aziraphale cautious and prefer to stuck with things he's sure about, so he can pick more day to day human stuff from songs, TV, magazines.

So he deals with humans, mostly for work reasons. But he rarely looks interested in individual humans. He's gets more of observer vibe, with his comments about humans being so and so; he comes, he makes some trouble, he goes away, never stuck for long. And I think it's combination of him not really being people person, him being afraid to get attached and lost, or, what worse, being directly involved in harming new human friend, and also him protecting his cool persona. I think *he* thinks that if he only hangs with people at professional basis, they won't see under his James Bond cosplay. Which is hilarious because Shadwell shamelessly pumped money of him, lady from 1941 minisode yells at him as if he was a unruly child and Nina had two conversations with him before she decided she's good enough to teach him about life, love and communication.

So I'll say they both get into human cultures in their own way, and they both get to know humans in their way, and when you start to pick a pieces you eventually see that they're actually similar in their interest and in otherworldly way they process this things. And in the end that's what's it all about: there's no some great divide in how they they approach humanity, that thing that they approach it at all is what unite them.

Just had a random thought about how differently Crowley and Aziraphale interact with humans and their culture throughout history. More or less, Crowley interacts with the culture and Aziraphale interacts with the people. There's so much nuance of course because I'm thinking about how aziraphales appreciation of culture comes purely through food, and Crowley tends to notice people's social cues and little details about people. But thinking about in Rome, or Victorian times or the wives in the 1960s. Crowley is always experimenting with her gender expression and the culture of the place where he resides. I think that the way Crowley works is he really lives in the places he lives in such as going to bars, talking to people on the street, the lowlife, the nightlife, actually paying rent for some goddamn reason. But aziraphale stays on his own for the most part, he absorbs the people he interacts with but definitely stays outside of fashion trends, and altogether doesn't really immerse himself in any culture. It's why he's unaware of the life the poor live in the grave digging minisode, and also the reason he has so many signed books from magicians and prophesy tellers. He engages with the people for long periods of time. Is he super good at listening to human emotions? Not exactly... But is he great at cataloguing and absorbing the essence of the people he meets? Yeah.

[paradox-liveheadcanons]

Baek Chungsung Relationship Headcanons

Confession -

You were a close acquaintance of the Yeon Family; to be more specific, an excellent business partner.

Your family frequently visited them, disguised as a friendly banquet between family friends whilst business deals were being handled behind doors.

Although being many years older than Hajun and Dongha, they have always been the stars, rumored to be the new heirs (a.k.a. Your new business partners).

That being said, you basically knew every individual in their family, even being on first-name basis with many of the staff.

That meant you’d notice a new face from far away.

The amount of butlers Dongha cycled through each year caused many eyebrows to raise, including yours.

So when Dongha introduced Baek Chungsung to you (with that familiar smug smile you’ve always seen him wear since he was only 6), you couldn’t help but think, “How long will this one last?”.

It was when you’ve been greeting Chungsung almost 2 years now when you realize that Dongha might have found someone he could play with.

One day, you spot him standing and talking to your assistant, an uncommon sight since he often sends you messages in Dongha’s stead (albeit disrespectful on Dongha’s part, you let him go since he was only 14).

“Good afternoon, the young master requires you to look through these files…”

He’d trail on as you and your assistant wait around. With a sharp eye, you notice a slight discoloration peeking out from under his suit.

“Why don’t you join my assistant and I for dinner.” You interrupted him; intent to know more about what’s happening with him.

Both Chungsung and your assistant looked at you in shock. The gaze you had on Chungsung made him cough, the tips of his ears turning red.

Although hesitant with saying ‘yes’, you told him you’d tell Dongha you personally invited him out to dinner for business so he had no way to refuse.

Your assistant was a bit intimidated by the energy you were exuding so they politely excused themself out of your plans.

Once dinner rolled around, you realized that Chungsung was an expert conversationalist.

Entertaining you and pleasing you with the subjects he brought up, your conversations continued through the night; to the point you had to ask him out one more time.

Unsurprisingly, Chungsung charmed you and you asked him out, starting a romantic (albeit being an interesting) relationship.

Beginning -

Often busy with work, it was hard to reach out to him; despite that he often messages and calls you when he has time.

He was the perfect gentleman, a romantic lover that checked every box.

A bouquet of roses you wake to, a box of chocolates to celebrate your 100th day together, a 5 star dinner date, he was basically the perfect significant partner.

You both lived in bliss, content with each other's company. There really wasn’t anything you can ask for at this point.

Getting to Know More About Each Other -

Despite making you extremely happy, you could tell there was something Chungsung was hiding. Not only were you seeing more discoloration and bruising on his skin, he also seemed to always awkwardly (and uncomfortably) smile if you complimented or flirted with him.

You didn’t want to pressure him into telling you what’s wrong; but with Chungsung’s quick intuition, he knew you’re starting to catch on.

When he finally exposed his masochistic tendencies, you could only raise an eyebrow as the dots started connecting; why Dongha was always changing butlers, why Chungsung stayed for so long and why Chungsung always blushed whenever you were very forward with him.

Although it unsettled you at first, this weird s/m relationship Dongha had with his butler (at his young age too?!) you talked things out with Chungsung to make things work since his heart was stolen by you.

Your relationship dynamic slowly changed bit by bit, the both of you having a (CONSENSUAL) s/m relationship with you providing lots of aftercare for Chungsung (the first time you saw his uncared for, bruised body, you inwardly flinched at how painful it looked).

Chungsung got more comfortable with you taking care of him; never imagining that he could ever receive gentle touches that would heal his broken body.

Saying ‘I love you’ -

He’s not the type to casually throw loving words nor is he the type to receive them easily.

He’s a very popular man; charming, attractive, respectful, it wouldn’t be surprising if he got confessions thrown at him left right.

But each time he’d always politely decline it with his signature smile.

When he’s in love, although a bit hesitant to say it, he looks into your eyes (something he does very often when he wants to show someone he’s paying attention) and whispers, “I love you.”

He was afraid that if he spoke any louder, his sincerity might slip away. Those were words meant to be uttered to someone he truly loves; you.

It’s the first time in a while he slightly blushed innocently when you said the words back; the tips of his ears turning a shade of pink.

Despite all the responsibilities you both shouldered (as it came with your ages), the affectionate words passed creates a pure love that you both possessed for one another.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

SHOUT OUT TO THE THREE CHUNGSUNG STANNIES OUT THERE I GOT YOU BABES I GOT YOU.

If I’m gonna be honest. Chungsung’s the first character to STUMP ME for a while when it comes to romantic headcanons w him.

Esp with the s/m play. But it’s interesting to explore his character through my own thoughts/opinions of him. But I kind of want to expand a little more in which: I think Chungsung would genuinely love his partner and that the s/m bit is just. He enjoys suffering from literally anyone. Mans just… loves pain innit.

Hope yall enjoyed <333 Sharing only love and prosperity muah muah <33 - 🐝

[athenasdisappointment]

Being Best Friends with Benny Headcanons

Pairing: Benny Miller x Best Friend! Reader

Warnings: 16+, very fluffy, brief mention of getting drunk and kissing, just tooth rooting fluff, no use of (Y/N).

Words: 747

Reading time: 3m

Notes: I think Benny would be the best best friend a human could ask for (I love our golden retriever of a man). English isn't my primary language, so I apologize for any possible mistake. Feel free to correct me. Thank you!!!

I fully believe Benjamin Miller is a Pink Floyd hardcore fan and will make you listen to all their albums;

If you were already acquainted with the band's discography it would only strengthen your bond. If not, he would present you with valid arguments about how they are one of the best bands to have ever existed;

"Babycakes, you don't understand their geniality!" - proceeds to ramble about every album;

Calls you "babycakes" most definitely;

At first, it annoyed you, being the primary reason why he kept calling you that;

With time the nickname grew on you, and to get him back, you now call him Benji;

Which he hates;

He doesn't hate it, but god forbid any soul tells you that;

Benjamin is the type of friend who always has your back;

He will cheer you on when you're working on a big project, and will gladly give his opinion and advice, but only if you ask for it;

He's the friend who has your happiness listed as a top priority;

If you need life advice, be it something new you wanna try but are scared of, or you need to decide something concerning a relationship, he is the type of friend who reminds you of how powerful you are and that your happiness & well-being come first to anything;

Benjamin will also defend you when he sees that an argument you're having with someone is gonna become physical;

He knows you can hold yourself, but he doesn't want to see you hurt. Especially when he knows he could have prevented it;

In the case of you switching roles, he's struggling with his words and becoming agitated, you are stepping in and putting the person who dared yell at your best friend in their place;

Benjamin is just a big teddy bear. You need to hold him after encounters like the one mentioned before;

He deals with a lot of PTSD, and throughout the years, you learned to calm him down and avoid episodes;

Being best friends with Benny means spending a lot of time with the boys;

They all love you and see how you are exactly what Benny needed;

Benny spends more time at your apartment than at his own house;

"You see babycakes, why would I prefer to spend time alone, all by myself, when I could be in the presence of the most amazing and interesting person in the whole wide world?!" - he will tell you that with the smuggest grin his face could perform;

To which you respond, "You just didn't want to cook isn't it?";

"Why bother when you do it so well?";

Because of the countless times, you had this talk, dinners in each other's houses become regular. You cook, and he chooses the movie;

You never watch the movie in its entirety, becoming distracted by whatever drama you decide to gossip about, or the philosophical dilemma Benny comes up with;

"Do you think it should be sock, sock, shoe, shoe or sock, shoe, sock, shoe?";

As I mentioned before, Benny is hopeless when it comes to fixing stuff around the house;

Still, he will volunteer if you need anything repaired;

You made the mistake of letting him fix a cupboard's door once, and let's just say you call somebody other than Benny to help you fix it before you tell him;

Back to those nights you spend at each other's houses, you fall asleep cuddling most of the time;

There might have been a drunk night where you two were feeling lonely and ended up making out;

You don't speak of it;

At any point in your life, if one of you is in a relationship, the dinners will still be a constant occurrence, just less frequent;

Explaining to your partners the relationship dynamic you have with Benny, is also something you have discussed;

You're not changing the way you act around each other for somebody who might not be permanent;

You don't cross any lines, and even though you are very physical, it never leaves the friend zone;

You and Benny have agreed that if you become 40 and are still single, you're marrying the other;

Now to wrap up, I just want to say that your friendship with Benny is the kind people dream and wish for themselves;

You complete each other and you can not imagine life without Benjamin Miller in it;

He feels the same way about you.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading my work! I hope you enjoyed it!

[notanotherinfjblog]

I've been thinking more about this actually. And while I've seen trends in which types flock with which, I do think everyone has their own personal reasons for their preferences in particular judging functions. We choose those functions in other people that benefit us in some way.

And I was thinking about my own dynamics with FJs, TPs, FPs and TJs, and about how I personally feel and behave in their company, when it suddenly clicked for me why it makes so much sense that I gravitate towards TJs. You can think about your preferences in your own life as my reasoning will probably not apply to you, except some other FJs perhaps, but these are my thoughts:

FJs are easy to connect with for me on a superficial level and I like being around them, but they are giving me nothing. When two FJs meet, we always face one of two possible outcomes: 1) no decisions will be made because neither of us wants to step on any toes and instead wants to go along with whatever the other person chooses, but neither of us chooses anything because we are both like this, or 2) they are less timid than me, see my timidity and then go into mother hen mode and make decisions for me because they figure they are doing me a favour in taking the burden off my shoulders. I'm not a fan of either outcome.

TPs are fine, but there is nothing drawing me towards them. All TPs in my life are either family or work acquaintances. I've had some ESTP friends, but we always gradually lost touch because there was simply nothing that kept drawing us together. Their Ti makes sense to me, but I don't feel like I've got much to gain from it except maybe some mild exhaustion, and I imagine that TPs feel the same way about my Fe.

FPs are tricky. There is a certain subtype of Fi that I get on very well with (funnily enough, those FPs are typically the ones that end up in relationships with other FJs). A lot of FPs, however, tend to make me feel like I have to walk on eggshells around them, like I can't speak my mind and have to apologise for being the way I am and thinking the way I do. I'm certain that this is absolutely not their intention, but if you've got both Fe and social anxiety like I do, you need to be liked by other people and so you adapt and adapt and adapt. The thing is, though, that a lot of FPs will judge you specifically for doing that. They want authenticity from me, but that's not something that I can give. They will not tell me that they are disappointed in me for not being "my true self" around them (whatever that is) because they don't want to hurt my feelings, but not explicitly communicating that to me usually makes me feel like I'm simply not worth being around.

TJs, however, are great because they are straightforward with me. They show emotion in a casual way around me, like it's not as big a deal to feel this emotion like a lot FJs and FPs often make it out to be, but it's just like yeah, I'm annoyed by this, yeah, I'm terrified of that, let's work around that and get this thing done regardless. Makes me feel safe. Whenever I need advice, I always end up asking either an ESTJ, ENTJ or INTJ and no one else. They are always the ones giving me honest advice, not shying away from telling me that I'm overreacting or a bit incapable or whatever, but their advice is always solid, and they always respect me if I decide not to follow it. As my ESTJ friend always says "you are your own person, do what you feel is right, but this is how I see it." They are the ones that I feel completely safe openly disagreeing with and I like when they openly disagree with me. This way, we can have honest and interesting discussions. If I wanted someone in my life who thinks everything I do is great, I'd get a dog. I want to be told that I'm being overdramatic or unreasonable. I want to be called out on my flaws, and I can always count on my TJs to do that and I always know that it comes from a place of love.

If we use single combat as a metaphor here, I always feel like FPs are the ones running away from fighting me because they don't want to hurt me, FJs choose to fight in my place to protect me, TPs fight me for fun, and TJs are the ones giving me a sword and showing me how to use it. They are the ones challenging me to become a better person, but they never expect me to change. I do that myself because they are right.

If you want to share your own reasons for why you think it makes sense that you, personally, would gravitate towards a particular function and are willing to share, please do! I'm always interested!

As I've just realised a trend in my own friendships, what are the mbti types of the majority of people that you voluntarily and regularly surround yourself with? So I don't mean people you have to see every day like a parent if you still live with them or a co-worker you wouldn't want to go out to get drinks with, but your actual close friends or partners or anyone else you choose to spend a lot of time with. So:

[ocvtis]

Romantic matchup for @011tsukishima

_

I match you with...

Arataki Itto and Chifuyu Matsuno 💋

You and Itto would be such a wholesome couple aaaa

Even Itto at first seems intimidating, until you hear him speak at least- in my opinion despite people saying that at first meeting you seem threatening, to Itto you didn't give that impression at all, in fact he had no problem approaching you and starting a conversation with you (also because he is a person who doesn't care about appearances and is very impulsive). The reason why he wanted to talk to you was to express the joy he felt at seeing you dance, since he happened to be watching one of your performances; that's how your acquaintance began, which then evolved into something more ;>

Itto is a spontaneous and funny person, in my opinion it didn't take long for you to get familiar with him and to open up, showing your funnier side. Your couple dynamic is based on humor and fun, and it is clear to everyone how much you care about each other. The members of his gang were so surprised when they found out that their dear leader had found a girlfriend, the reactions of his comrades were different from each other: some were surprised and wondered how an idiot like him had found a partner (no ok-)), some were so happy that they were moved to tears and some were ecstatic about the idea and wanted Itto introduce her to the gang

The fact that you are a calm person who doesn't get angry easily is a good thing, since Itto is a very impulsive, competitive person who often exaggerates, qualities that make him make a lot of trouble, and let's just say it's hard to contain yourself when dealing with his messes lol.

Nah, with Itto you don't have to worry about talking too much, he thinks the fact that you have so much to say makes the conversation more interesting. If you stopped talking in the middle of the conversation Itto would tell you to continue, since he was interested in what you were saying!

Ooo Itto really likes your makeup!!! He would propose a challenge to you, that is, you do his makeup and he does yours, whoever does the best makeup gets a delicious bowl of ramen. Why Itto proposed this challenge to you is a mystery since he can't do makeup, probably his confidence told him he would win, idk 💀. It ended up that you gave him diva makeup with gorgeous eye shadow, and he made you look like a clown. Well, since you are a kind person I am sure you will share your prize with him :>

Itto would carry you on his shoulders to prevent you from tripping over something and hurting yourself, especially if the road you are walking on is not paved. In that position you would have the privilege of being able to touch his horns, woah.... 👁️👁️

_

Chifuyu would be a perfect partner: he would be kind, loyal, understanding, and I feel like it would be easy to make him blush, which makes him even more adorable. Although he is stubborn and sometimes naive he is a very good person who cares a lot about those around him, you are lucky to have him as your boyfriend.

In my opinion Chifuyu's reaction to seeing you become sassy and sarcastic when a person is rough on you would be funny. I mean, he would be surprised in a good way, since he didn't imagine that his girlfriend who is so kind and calm could respond so sharply. Yep, he would definitely be proud of you and like you even more ;)

Chifuyu is very loyal to his friends and is always ready to fight for them. With you as his partner, he would be even more protective, and he would be ready to go against anyone who hurts you. This is something you share, since like him you hate it when someone hurts the people you love. You would be a couple always ready to have each other's backs.

The first time he heard you sneeze he was reminded of his cat Peke J, since it was a sneeze worthy of an adorable kitten. Yes, even though he would never tell you he finds your sneezes too cute <3

The fact that you care so much about the happiness of the people around you and are so careless about your own well-being makes him angry. He would scold you about how you should put yourself first since you are the most important thing. If you continue to act with this mentality, Chifuyu will take care of trying to make sure that you can always be happy.

Nah, I don't think it would be a problem for Chifuyu if you are a person who likes to sleep; he would offer to rest your head on his shoulder, and when he is sure you are asleep he would look at you out of the corner of his eye, and admire your face with a smile on his lips.

[sneverussape]

What kind of person do you think lily was? There's a lot said about her in the series, but i have trouble reconciling pure, shining paragon lily with someone who would marry someone that spent years tormenting her friend, 4 on 1.

ooh boy this will be a LOT. i can't even promise it will be coherent but i'll make an attempt to be. (going under a cut to save us all the grief).

first off, i think it's fair to state that one of the biggest drawbacks of lily's character is how she was written. she is a plot device. she exists to boost other characters’ narratives: she's simultaneously the Rich Boy's trophy wife, the self-sacrificing mother of the Boy Who Lived, the best friend slash lost love of the Fallen Hero, and, at the same time, also no one at all. lily is a character with little to no background and character development that she can barely stand on her own two feet without any of the associated (usually male) characters to prop her up. it absolutely sucks but that's how it is. that's how jk wrote her.

given that and working with the scraps that we do have, my opinion of lily is...complex. i try to give her justice by trying to understand her context, the workings of her mind, and the possible pressures she was subjected to, but it can be challenging especially since lack of canon pushes you into a space where you have to put them in Either/Or situations. my opinion of her has also changed as i got older. when i was younger (i read the books waaaay back, as they were getting released in fact) i only saw her as an extra character (i was most interested in snape, if that's not obvious enough, but neither did i think snape was 'obsessed' with her as a lot of hp fans now think). i saw her and snape as good friends who had had a falling out, and that he'd probably had a crush on her at some point, and it got naturally overtaken by guilt etc when she died. then when i reread some chapters containing her, i was quick to put her in the Bad Friend camp. i don't think that now. i think that she, like snape, was a complex human being who made a lot of questionable decisions but shouldn't be entirely vilified for them.

my main thoughts of her that are kind of built on material from canon as well as what jkr has said herself:

- she was not posh. she grew up in cokeworth, in the same town as severus. i don't think she was middle class as a lot of fics portray her. i think the evanses were slightly better off than the snapes but they were all working-class, and living was a day-to-day struggle. the kids spoke in the local accent, their clothes were all worn and patched over, there were no green spaces or public infrastructure for kids to safely play in, and they were all mostly running wild about the town since all their parents had to work. food was something to be thankful for because there was never enough, and sometimes they had to share with their neighbors. that's the kind of setting i think lily and severus grew up in, although severus suffered abuse on top of it all. it's possible that lily did too because of the setting (post-world war 2, poverty, adults dealing with repressed trauma from the war, etc) and it wouldn't even be that surprising if she had been;

- she and petunia got along fairly well up until the point lily found out she was a witch and, as a result, became friends with severus. it's stated in canon that petunia had also wanted to attend hogwarts with them, going as far as writing to dumbledore to allow her admittance. her jealousy upon his rejection had festered and grown into outright hate that she projected onto harry as an adult, but i don't doubt that she continued to love lily even after her death and despite how she treated harry. i think as kids they had stuck together and were very close, but magic had torn them apart. suddenly lily had a world of her own that petunia wasn't welcome in, and that would have hurt. pottermore stated lily attended vernon and petunia's wedding or engagement party but james made a right mess of it. i think lily TRIED to maintain their relationship but external factors always got in the way. i don't doubt she had also loved her sister very much;

- i don't think she had any other friends. she may have had a lot of acquaintances but i think her only real friend, the one who saw her for who she really was, was severus, and i think, at a certain point in their lives, she saw that as a weakness and resented it;

- i think, from the interactions we saw in canon of lily with other people, that lily had a penchant to please people, especially the ones who ranked higher than her in terms of power dynamics - petunia (who was the older sister), professors (sluggy comes to mind, the head of slytherin with a lot of connections), even the marauders whose actions she defended. it's not necessarily a bad thing, but i've always seen it as her being borderline manipulative. i noted that she wasn't the same with severus (based on their conversations, especially the ones in 5th year, before SWM) because he's lower than her in a lot of aspects, being a slytherin and quite likely of a lower social standing. she could boss him around and tell him to piss off and he probably wouldn't have minded. she actually strikes me as someone who could have been in slytherin; a perfect arrangement, save for the fact that she was a muggleborn. i think lily knew her place and the cards she was dealt with more than anyone, but she was also determined not to stay there;

- this brings me to the point as to why she ever went out with james potter in the first place. i think her friendship breakup with severus was inevitable because they were in the middle of a burgeoning war and both of them were being pulled to opposite and opposing ends. as an added complexity, i think she also wanted to be better than being muggleborn lily evans of cokeworth, best friend of the evil greasy slytherin git, and her way out was to associate with housemates who were in the upper echelons of power. like, we don't even know what her life was like in gryffindor tower. ron was poor, but he was also a pureblood, so that may have saved him from ridicule. but what if you were a poor muggleborn, with a northern accent to boot? in the same way severus trained himself to be more posh, lily could have done the same and could have furiously tried to blend in. maintaining a friendship with severus would have ended in heartbreak as there were too many risks and it likely outweighed the gains. this was the wizarding world too which is much much smaller than the muggle world and relied on connections more than anything. openly siding with the marauders would have saved her skin and secured her a future (which, as we all know, was forfeit anyway but whatever);

- jumping to the jily relationship, i honestly think it was also not one that was meant to last. iirc jkr projected a lot onto lily, so i'm surmising jily reflected a lot of her own failed relationships. i think james and lily had a less-than-ideal relationship, one that involved abuse (verbal, emotional, mental, physical, take your pick, but at least one form of it), and i think she may have been unhappy in the last year of her life, living in hiding with none of her own friends (if they even existed) and seeing no one else but james' pals. her only light in that darkness was likely harry as she couldn't even see her own family. i think, during those times, she thought a lot about the home she left behind and, as a consequence, her lost friendship with severus. she probably missed him, and i'm sure she must have been very lonely.

in sum, i don't think she was the Virgin Mary figure a lot of hp fans paint her to be. imho she had her own questionable but utterly human moments, and i just tried to fill in the blanks as to why she would have acted the way she did. i don't think it was easy to be lily evans at all, and majority of the 21 years of her life was likely a struggle.