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isa-beenme · 2 years ago

Note

For the bingo, could you do friends to lovers with Azriel? Also, I love your writing!

First of all, thank you very much, I really appreciate this type of comments about my writing, it makes me so happy and I always feel motivated 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

NOW

I was on my normal Taylor Swift moment and BOOM she said "Damn, never seen that color blue" and I knew I was done from now on if I didn't write something for Azriel with this song 🥹

Here we are, thank you

Delicate

As the night unfolds at Rita's, you and the Inner Circle are enjoying yourselves together, laughing and sharing stories with each other. The atmosphere is lively, and the free bottles of wine are definitely contributing to the merriment. Since Rita's birthday when Rhysand gifted her a ridiculous amount of wine that she was sure she couldn't sell she's been proposing games every Saturday night and obviously the most eager to participate were you and your friends.

Tonight the idea is to go up to the stage and share one secret with everyone in the bar. If they think the secret is good enough they'll scream and you can go back to your table with a bottle of wine. It started pretty light, some nonsense secrets that people only laughed at and no one took a bottle. However, as the night progresses, the secrets start to get deeper and more personal, granting a lot of people an unhealthy amount of alcohol in their bodies.

You and your friends decided to participate too, knowing that whatever you said up there would make people scream. After each member of the Inner Circle goes up on stage and reveals a dumb little secret, it's finally your turn. With a slightly tipsy but determined gait, you take the stage, capturing everyone's attention, including Azriel's, who's watching you with curiosity but a bit of concern, taking your itty bitty drunk state.

You hesitate for a moment, thinking about the secret you wanted to reveal. I mean, now everyone in Rita's knew they couldn't use the table in the House of the Wind after Nestha's confession. Yours wouldn't hurt that much, right? So you take a deep breath and begin to speak. You started light, recounting the years you've spent together with your friends, the adventures you've shared, and the unbreakable bond you've formed as friends. A story that made everyone happy.

Until you finally pulled the card from your sleeve, telling everyone the day you met Azriel and how you felt. The friendship you created with him and how exactly your feelings started to develop after the years you spent together. The funny moments and the sad ones too, the love you felt for everyone in the Inner Circle would never compare to how you felt about the Shadowsinger. And you meant it, you are in love with him, for the cauldron's sake! You said you are content with being his best friend, but you love him so much that sometimes you think you might explode.

Your declaration of love is met with stunned silence by the whole bar and then a round of applause from the Inner Circle, who had no idea about your feelings until this moment. Rita grants you three bottles of wine at once, your state not making you understand exactly why but you accept it gladly, trembling back to the table with your friends.

Azriel's heart skips a beat as he listens to your words, trying to process the depth of your emotions. He's touched by your honesty, damn, he feels every bit the same for you, but he also knows that you had quite a bit to drink, which might have influenced your decision to share this with everyone. Especially when you don't react to the provoking of your friends and just play along, not quite comprehending why everyone was so excited but happy to be happy with them.

As the applause finally dies down, and the rest of your group opens another bottle, Azriel quickly stands up, thanking everyone for the entertaining night and requesting their understanding that you might be a little overwhelmed right now and that he would take you back home. You protested and tried to sit back, only for him to take you on his shoulder, guiding you out of the noisy bar and into the cool night air.

Once outside, Azriel lets you down and wraps his arm around your shoulder, supporting you as you walk. Saying that going home on foot would help you sober up a little bit.

-You know, you didn't have to do that - He says gently, concern evident in his voice - Anything you said would be good enough for them.

-I know - You funnily reply, your cheeks flushed with both embarrassment and alcohol, your words getting out tripping from your mouth - But I just... I couldn't keep it in any longer. I had to tell you. I love you this much - You let go of him just to open your arms wide and show him the amount of love you had - Maybe even more. It would need the whole court to open their arms to show you how much - He laughs at you and makes you walk again, holding you close to him the whole way.

-You mean the world to me, do you know that? I never want to lose you, I think I might die if I do - Your shocked expression makes him laugh again, the sound fluttering your heart again.

-No, don't die, Azriel, please - You hug him tightly and then place a hand on his cheek - I don't want to lose you ever ever. And even if you don't feel the same way, I need you to know - Azriel's expression softens, and he gently takes your hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

-Let's talk about this tomorrow when you're not under the influence of gallons of wine. I promise we'll figure things out, okay? - You only nod, trusting him completely, and allow Azriel to lead you to the Town House.

Back in your room, you found a way to stumble into every single fitment in every single room you went through, laughing each time your body hit something different. Azriel guides you to your bathroom with gentle care. Your steps are unsteady, and your words are still a bit slurred, a clear indication of how much alcohol was still in your body, and that the walk did nothing to sober you up. Despite your inebriated state, you kept trying to talk to him, but your words were sometimes muddled and difficult to comprehend, which only made Azriel agree and continue to take you to your destination.

-I hope you're not mad at me. I know it's a delicate matter to you and I said it in front of everyone in the whole Velaris - You turned to him when he made you sit in the tub edge while he turned on the water and filled it with shower salts and scents - Is it cool that I said all that? Maybe I crossed the line. Sometimes I wonder if you would ever look at me and think about me the same way that I do. Is it too soon to have this conversation? I feel like I made a mess of myself now and-

-Shh, it's okay. You don't need to explain anything - Azriel whispers, his voice soothing - We'll talk in the morning when you're feeling better. Right now, let's get you cleaned up and ready for bed.

He helps you undress and assists you into the tub, his gaze never lowering for too long from your face. Making sure the water is warm and comforting he washes your hair and helps you clean your body when you distract yourself with the bubbles floating in the water or when you have sudden low peaks of energy and simply lies your head on his chest and lets him do all the work - that he gladly does.

After the shower, Azriel wraps a fluffy towel around you, gently patting you dry until you say you can do it alone. He hands you a glass of water that he summoned from the house, encouraging you to drink it to help with the inevitable hangover. You comply, taking small sips at times while he dresses you in some of the sleeping clothes he found in your massive wardrobe, his eyes still filled with affection and yours with gratitude.

-Will you stay with me tonight? - You ask with a plea in your voice once he settles you in your bed, now that he dressed you in a nightgown and dried your hair.

-Of course - Azriel replies without hesitation, his heart aching at the sight of your vulnerability. He climbs into bed beside you, pulling the covers over you both, cocooning you in his warmth. He wraps his arms around you gently, holding you close as you snuggle into his embrace, feeling his scent and the heat that irradiates from his skin.

-You're my best friend - You murmur, your words still slightly slurred - I'm glad I told you how I feel. Or everyone at Rita's. Even if... even if it's complicated.

-I'm glad you told me too. And I promise, we'll figure this out together. But right now, rest. We can talk more tomorrow when you're feeling better - Azriel brushes a soft kiss on your forehead, slowly wrapping you with his wings as if testing the territory.

As the night wears on, your breathing steadies, and you drift into a peaceful slumber in Azriel's arms. He stays awake for a while, watching over you, his mind a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. He cares and loves you so much that his heart aches sometimes, and your confession has brought a mix of joy and trepidation to his mind.

In the quiet darkness, he decides that whatever the future holds for him, he will always cherish your friendship and be there for you, just as he has always been. And as he finally succumbs to sleep, he hopes that the morning will bring clarity and understanding for both of you, strengthening the bond that has held you together for so long.

The morning light begins to filter into the room, gently rising you from your slumber. As you open your eyes, memories from the previous night flood back, and you can't help but cringe with embarrassment at your drunken confession and all of the conversations that followed after. You try to cover your face with your hands, wishing you could disappear, but you're met with a strong pair of arms holding you still in place. Tracing the tattoos you know so well you realize who exactly is holding you in your bed. Azriel stirs beside you, sensing the movements you were making. He brushes a hand over your back soothingly to calm you down.

-Hey, there's no need to be so hard on yourself, slow down a bit - he whispers softly.

You finally gather the courage to look at him, expecting disappointment or awkwardness in his expression. Instead, you only find warmth and understanding in his eyes.

-I remember everything - You admit, voice tinged with shame - I'm sorry, Az. I must have made a complete fool of myself. And you probably felt so embarrassed - Azriel lifts your chin gently, causing you to meet his gaze directly, his touch not letting you look away.

-You have nothing to be sorry for - He says earnestly - Last night, you were just being honest about your feelings. I value that honesty, and I value you. It doesn't change anything between us.

-But... but I was drunk, and I told so many things about us, things that no one knew - You stammered, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

-Yes, you were drunk, I acknowledge that, but your feelings were still genuine. And to be honest, I've been wrestling with my own feelings too - Azriel smiles softly, his thumb brushing against her cheek.

-You have? - Your eyes widen, hope flickering in your heart.

-I didn't want to make any rash decisions last night, but this is something I've known since the first time I met you. I care about you deeply, and I've been in love with you for a long time too - Your heart skips a beat at his confession, a wave of relief washing over you.

-You have? - You ask, needing to hear those words again.

-Yes - Azriel replies, his voice steady - I love you too - Unable to contain your emotions any longer, you throw your arms around him, hugging him tightly.

-I was so scared I'd ruin everything - You admit, your voice muffled against his shoulder. Azriel holds you close, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

-You could never ruin anything between us. I cherish our friendship on top of everything, but I've come to realize that what we should have is something even deeper. I want to explore this with you, if you're willing to - Tears of joy and relief gather in your eyes as you pull back to look at him.

-I want that too - You say, voice filled with love and happiness - I want to see where this takes us.

-Then let's take it one step at a time. No need to rush anything. We'll figure it out together, just like we always do - Azriel smiles, his hand cupping your cheek tenderly.

-Thank you for being understanding and for not pushing me away - You say gratefully, kissing the palm of his hand that were holding you. He slowly leans in, pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

In that moment, you and Azriel were embarking on a new chapter of your relationship, one filled with love, trust, and the knowledge that you have been each other's best friends and confidantes all along only to become the best of lovers. And honestly, you weren't feeling any bit of nervousness, the years you spent growing your friendship making you sure that you wouldn't get out of this situation hurting. Actually, you were sure you wouldn't get out of this situation. Which you were completely content about.

-I could never push you away - He whispers, your foreheads resting together - You mean too much to me.

#spotify #acotar #azriel × reader #azriel #azriel shadowsinger #azriel/reader #azriel x oc #azriel x reader #azriel x female!reader

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ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously · 1 year ago

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Another post? damn

I was on vacation a few weeks back and had no internet so I downloaded all Fanfciton that were Satoru/Shoko tagged and rated them.

Here are the ones I rated 5/5 ... so i guess this is a ff recommendation post lol

The delicate art of flirting

3rdgymbros

Words: 1,960, Satosho, 5/5

This is so good. I love that the first years get brought into the infirmary and they just KNOW ahahahahah. Also it’s just this casual side thing but there something so much deeper that i hurts which i like about this ship

Like a lost shirt

Lua

Words:1,520, Satosho, 5/5

I am a sucker for raw and "practical" relationships. Like this is exactly how I imagine them to grieve for Suguru and I love that so much can be left unsaid but the reader and Satoru and Shoko both just know. What they have isn't healthy but it's the only thing they can have. A happy and healthy relationship with someone else would just simply not work. They are both too fucked up for that.

Sorry about the blood in your mouth (i wish it was mine)

Her_black_tights

Words: 17,761 Sashisu/ Satosho 5/5

So I am biased on this one cuz this is one of my headcanons. That Suguru fucked around with both and that his absence is why Gojo and Shoko are a thing. And I feel like this fic perfectly encapsulates the hurt, the brokenness and the necessity of their relationship. Like this is how they cope and its messy and unhealthy and i love it

Listen I love you joy is coming

Antioedipus

Words:3,938 Satosho 5/5

This one is cute. Nah cute is the wrong word, they are goblins but it’s nice. They are both fucked up which is funny. Also 100% can see that Shoko doesn't have the emotional capacity to console a crying woman but still would do the right thing even if she doesn't think it’s the right thing.

Work and not run (skip and not fall)

Aminstrel

Words:2,300 Satosho 5/5

Love this! Cute! Exactly how i Imagine them. Also match cut? Peak comedy hahahaha goblin energy.

Catalyst

tiressian

Words:4,170 Satosho 5/5

AYOOOOO first tiressian ff. i remember reading this and having gotten new horizons opened xD Anyway: love it, super nice character interaction. Love it when Gojo is stumbling over his words, a tiressian special! Also love the aftermath, hilarious but sweet.

To my significant (b)other

Tiressian

Words: 6,621 Satosho 5/5

Another banger! Back to back? Spoiled honestly. I love this one just because it makes so much sense that she writes a list. Also Gojo high as balls is hilarious. Then the whole dialogue at the wedding with the chaste touches omg my skin is prickling. Love it.

Warmth

Satoluvs

Words:2,663 Satosho 5/5

I LOVE THIS. Omg adopted Yuji has my heart. Also consoling somebody by not talking it out but taking them in giving them affection to cure the sadness omg. Also also Satoru and Shoko just dating super casually i looooovee it.

Breathing underwater

Shrimphony

Words:1,848 Sashisu/ Satosho 5/5

This one hurts so much omg. And this could easily be canon. Idk why Gege does not show us Shoko’s grief more…. Like even if it's platonic how can she not find solace in Gojo still being there hmm? And then when Gojo, Nanami and Yaga get ripped from her, that must have destroyed her…

Shore

Tiressian

Words:7,161 Satosho 5/5

VERY TASTY thank you for the meal. I love their dynamic. Back with the tiressian special. Also Shoko making him do push ups, same girl same i get it. Love the banter, it makes so much sense.

Epoch

Tiressian

Words:6,341 Satosho 5/5

Yum, yes, very nice. Love cheerleader Gojo, he has my heart, that poor dude. No other comments it's perfect

Call it a hunch

Tiressian

Words: 5,560 Satosho 5/5

I think this is one of my favourites hahhaha. I love how panda is trying to convince everybody hahahahah. Also the snowball fight is glorious xD the little yuta/maki you slipped in there, i see you hehehehe. And the end has me ROLLING HAHAHAHAH

It's the thought that counts

Tiressian

Words: 2,182 Satosho 5/5

THE CUTEST ahhhh i love them i really really need to draw the three of them uff.

there's lots of 4/5 ones too that I'd recommend but i need to cap the list somewhere xD (the google doc has 12 pages wtf ahahahah) This is up for changes anyway :P but enjoy my recommendations xD

#this is the beautiful labor of 4 weeks reading 60+ fanfiction #thank you riley for motivating me by dumbing your thoughts too #and letting me rand about ooc and abo :'D #omg the torture of being a rarepair shipper #on one side you want more ff's on the other side some ff's are just pure trash xDDDDDDD #doesnt matter i will read through them all #satosho #satosho weekend #satoru gojo #shoko ieiri #jjk #fanfiction

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moondust-imagines · 1 year ago

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Who gets the girl? (Adam Copeland x Fem!reader)

Reader isn’t the nicest person in this one :)

2000 Backstage at Monday Night Raw

Adam’s hands felt heavy on your hips as he guided you to grind on his jean clad thigh. His lips captured yours in a steamy kiss to dampen your quiet moans. The cool wall behind you was almost a welcome contrast to the heat radiating from you. Neither of you had time for this, someone was bound to be looking for one of you by now. He just couldn’t help himself.

“Adam!? Where the fuck are you we need to get ready” Christian called

Adam pulled away from you reluctantly. You instantly missed the warmth of him pressing against your body. He threw you a quick wink before disappearing around the corner, hopefully to divert Christian long enough to let you tidy up your dishevelled appearance before he suspected something.

Adam reappeared with Christian in tow not long after. You were touching up your lip gloss in the mirror, Adam caught your eye in the reflection and flashed you a grin.

“Think you can fix his ugly mug?” Adam joked as Christian sat in your make-up chair.

“Not a miracle worker I’m afraid but I’ll see what I can do” You teased, earning a playful glare from the man. You attempted to run your fingers through his hair to get it out of his face but got tangled in the knots.

“What have I told you about using conditioner? You’ve got a damn birds nest up here” You scolded

“Maybe you should shower with me to remind me” He replied quietly. You gave him a gentle slap to the shoulder, hoping Adam hadn’t heard his flirtatious comment.

“You’ve got the Hardys tonight right?” You asked while searching for your comb in the slightly organised chaos of your table.

“We sure do, speaking of which I should go find them while you’re dealing with bird brain here” Adam said, making a quick exit.

“He’s going to get suspicious if he hears you say stuff like that” You chastised Christian quietly, trying to brush through his hair as gently as you could

“So what? He’d probably congratulate me on following in his womanising footsteps” He joked “You know I’d tell the whole damn roster about us if you’d let me”

“I don’t get involved with co-workers Christian, you know that” You sighed

“Yeah? You seemed pretty involved with me in the locker room shower last week” He replied with a grin

You hadn’t meant to hurt Christian, you were young and too wrapped up in your own feelings to think about what you were doing to him. He was devastated when he had finally caught you and Adam. His sadness had quickly turned to rage then simmered to resentment over the years. You thought they had mended bridges a few years ago, Christian had been one of the groomsmen at your wedding.

Then Adam made his debut in AEW a few years later and that resentment reared its ugly head once more.

“I should go out there and talk to him” Your husband muttered. You were clutching his bicep while watching a monitor. Christian was running his mouth in the ring and you could feel the agitation rolling from Adam.

“You’re not going to change his mind Adam” You sighed “If you go out there, all that bad feeling is going to be out in the open again”

You shuddered at the memory of the harsh promos he had cut on you and Adam when the wound of your betrayal was still fresh. Being put on blast in public like that wasn’t fun, but maybe it was what you deserved.

“Baby, we have a whole life together! We’ve been married for years, we’ve got two beautiful girls. If he can’t see that we were meant to be, then he’s no longer the man I grew up with” Adam exclaimed

So Adam went to the ring and confronted him. And you watched on anxiously.

“You think you get to come out here and give me the big nostalgia speech? One last run? Hell no. You’ve taken everything from me: championships, recognition, you even got the girl! This is my turn, my turn to get my flowers!”

You squeezed your eyes shut, willing the tears not to run. You knew he was right, he deserved his time in the sun. You just wished he didn’t feel the need to step on his best friend to get it.

#aew imagine #christian cage x reader #adam copeland x reader

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captainharknxss · 7 months ago

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[A lot of what drew me to Jack as a character is his very interesting personal relationship with queerness.

He's from the 51st century and not from Earth. We don't know a ton about his upbringing, but everything he's said about 21st century Earth being behind the times implies that he grew up in a culture that didn't have the same hang ups about queerness, casual sex, and sex with consenting alien species’ that 2000’s Earth has.

I don't think the culture he grew up in ever tried to make him feel ashamed or othered due to his sexuality and that's had a massive impact on him. He didn't become the person he is despite having grown up being told it was perverse/etc. He lived his whole life as the person he is, and then as an adult found out that in other places people are going to treat him poorly because of it.

He doesn't have any sort of feeling of guilt over it, he just gets extremely fucking irritated when he's faced with this reality. He's bitter about the way people in the past act. It's stupid and closed minded and doesn't make any sense and don't they have something better to worry about?

When he started visiting the past, it was culture shock. Especially when men that he could damn well tell were gay would react violently to him hitting on them. The concept of being in the closet and internalized homophobia was totally foreign to him until he saw it with his own eyes. It's been a lot for him to navigate over the years, and he likes to think he's got it down to an art form at this point.

He's learned to be tactful; to make passes at men in private where he won't be outing them, to brace himself for backlash when he openly mentions his own sexuality in less forgiving times. He's not surprised by homophobia anymore, but it pisses him off more than anything else.

He gets mad at people being homophobic, but more than anything he gets mad at the circumstances. He's seen the amazing things that humans are capable of- but he keeps getting stuck in awful situations because back in the 21st century there's still a good handful of them that act like cavemen afraid of fire. It's ridiculous to him; it would be laughable if it wasn't so damn frustrating and sad, like getting beat up for wearing a blue shirt when you didn't get the memo that it was green shirt day. He'll never quite get why 21st century humans make such a big deal of it.

I have mixed opinions on season 4 of Torchwood, but one thing I do really like about it is how they continually touch on this topic. There's flashbacks from Jack's past of him dating a man named Angelo in the 1920’s. This mostly all happens in one episode so we don't get a lot of it, but one thing that the writers felt was important to show was them fighting about Angelo's internalized homophobia. Angelo would pray for forgiveness every night after they had sex and Jack is shown snapping at him for it and telling him to stop acting like he's ashamed of Jack. Ultimately, Angelo ends up telling others about Jack's immortality- he's branded as the devil and tortured, and he knows Angelo's internalized homophobia played a role in his decision to betray him. At one point it's suggested that Jack luring Angelo into sinful behaviors is more proof that he's the devil.

There's also ongoing bickering in season 4 between Jack and Rex. Rex is constantly making comments about Jack being queer, and Jack bites back every time. It's childish to him that Rex keeps bringing it up as though the fact that Jack is queer is going to suddenly make for a funny joke if he says it enough. It doesn't seem to really hurt him at all, he's just like “yes, I am queer, what point are you trying to make, because I don't really have the patience for it right now?”]

#headcanons;

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summercourtship · 7 months ago

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Damn…. favorite scene???? That’s such a hard question! Honestly… I love all scenes with each individual character, there were definitely some more iconic than others but an all time favorite is SO hard to pick (bcs you write them so well is hard to “pick” one ““better”” then other) but here are some off my “favorites”:

Edward: Chess scene, when he said: “I noticed you” and the reader “hugs” him and he is like: “Omg i can’t believe this is happening!! a woman is touching me”, when he gets sad when she didn’t want a cigarette bcs he wanted to indirectly kiss her lol, and the breakout in arkham that was a fun chapter!

Jonathan: This is underrated but… I loved their first kiss! Her continuing to talk while they kiss and him just telling her to shut up is so funny, THE GALA OMG!!!! I am going to say that this hole chapter was TOP TIER!!! them making out in the corridor (btw what did she hear that night?) HIS HAND ON HER THIGH????!!! Omg!!! all of those were SO GOOD!!! And when she came back from the halloween party and he was in her apartment. (we all know what i mean from that, the smut, i’m talking about the smut) ALSO!!!! When he confronted her in the basement!!! that scene was SO SCARY!!

Bruce/Batman: They dancing in the gala, specifically when Bruce says: “enjoying the scenery” (GOD! i could SEE his “Bruce Wayne” smirk creeping up his face), literally any time that they rode a motorcycle, i’m not even joking, i live for things like that, when they are at the beach just enjoying the view, Him letting the reader look at his childhood photos, their first “real” kiss at the bat signal!!!! aaaaaanddd every time Bruce said a variation of: “we’re in this together” (you got me giggling and kicking my feet, no joke)

Thanks for reading kyra! so sorry if some frases seem hard to read or just wrong! english isn’t my first language!!! Keep uo the good work girl!!! you can don this!!!

thank you!! and don't worry about your english, it's good!

Edward: I have to say- I think that Edward's scenes are some of my favorite in the fic, just in general. Which is crazy because I certainly hadn't intended on that being the case when I started writing. I just ended up really liking writing him. All of his part in Ch. 12 is probably near the top of my list for my favorite scenes....

Jonathan: I LOVE THEIR FIRST KISS SCENE!!!!! I remember being kinda sad when I first uploaded that chapter because NO ONE commented on that scene (and even a year after it was originally uploaded, it's a scene I'm very surprised people haven't talked to me about more- but then again, a lot of the earlier Jonathan scenes don't get brought up as much) and I was so scared I had disappointed people somehow.... glad to hear it stuck around in someone's mind!!

Bruce: To the anon who sent me the original biker bruce message: thank you so much for your contribution to STBOTDI canon. also I love their first (real) kiss scene so much (I think I'm just a sucker for dramatic first kisses..... hmm.) Kissing in the rain >>>

ALSO OKAY, this was gonna be revealed in an alternate POV but I have no idea when I'll get started on those again SOOO during the Sponsorship Gala, what the reader heard was actually Bruce. I imagine he was kinda keeping tabs on her (and Jonathan) the entire night because the only reason he attended at all was to scope out Jonathan in the first place. How much he saw.... well, you can decide for yourselves that.

#side note: remind me to put a smut scene where bruce is in the batsuit in his sequel #there was originally an idea for that somewhere in my head but obviously that was never realized #ask #anon #stbotdi

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mothmans-cumrag · 2 years ago

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Rewatching The Apple be like

finally! I took a break of about a year but I'm back!

I feel like I'm always saying this but how many people, especially high ranking people does it take for them to go on a mission? because of "strange sensor readings"??

I forgot how hot Bones is, fuck (<- this is also Jim's and Spock's internal monologue whenever they see him, btw)

"Husbandry would be quite efficacious" Spock I had to google that word before I was sure but I think you just proposed

Ah, the garden of Eden was just outside Moscow scene, we've all seen it

So he just used kilometres which I am happy about but before they were talking about the planet having an average of 76° which must mean Fahrenheit. I am confusion

killer flowers over here lol

Scotty fishing for shore leave <3 love him

Pavel using this situation to flirt as if he did't just see a colleague die like two metres in front of him

no matter how often I rewatch it, the explosive rock scene is one of the funniest things ever to me

Spock diving in front of a deadly plant for his boyfriends is the best thing ever to me, sorry not sorry <3<3<3<3<3<3

Oh wow, the transporters don't work, that's something I've never seen before in my life.

Spock calling the hypospray "potion" <3

Jim is so fucking right every time someone jumps in front of someone they could just fucking yell for them to get out of the way. This way it's much more romantic tho so...

These lighting bolts are so... realistic

Three redshirts down, and one of their dads apparently helped Jim get into the academy? But why did the redshirt not get a better job than redshirt if his dad apparently had some sort of influence?

ah, the survivor's guilt mixed with the guilt of being in charge... getting real Hans Kammerlander vibes rn... (google his name and the Manaslu if you don't know what I mean)

"what do you want, Violins?" will now be my answer every time someone comments on my tone of voice

ohhhhh, this was the planet of the Aryans! (not sure if my being German makes it more or less ok for me to say that, but there isn't another word I know for blonde ppl with blue eyes who are conventionally attractive)

Spock just touched this man's chin. With his hand. Is that cheating?

"If you don't get those Warp engine's working you're fired" mate if he doesn't fix them he'll literally die. WHat are you, Hermione?

Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more

"It makes me uncomfortable" bitch I bet, those things look scratchy as fuck

I like how half of them immediately got rid of these flower things <3 literally me

you tell him Spock! Humans literally are the minority!!!

"stawp fighting!!!! They've got the Enterprise!!!!" Jim I hear you but philosophical arguments are literally my only life source

sex. the word you're looking for is sex.

goddamnit they are all so uncomfortable talking about one of the most natural things in the world, idk if I should be amused or sad for them

awwwww, she calls him Pav!!! they are actually pretty cute

i feel gross watching the natives kiss and idk why

how to kill someone 101

oh really Spock. you telling me James Tiddies out Kirk wants to ignore the prime directive? wow. what a shocker. I am shocked.

Bones stepped on the belt of his tricoder when getting up and for some reason this is endearing to me

This is the third time Spock injured himself this episode and yet he is still capable of more sass than any squatch I know (get it? sasquatch. haha.

Damn, Martha can fight! Oh, and the last redshirt has died

awww hell nah, Scotty lost his job :(

awww hell yea, Scotty got his job back :)

They should give them actual sex ed wtf

the bickering at the end is always my favourite thing <3<3<3<3<3<3 10/10 will watch again (and again and again and again)

#st #star trek #tos #star trek tos #mcspirk #bc i talk about them as if they were canon

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rottenbrainstuff · 1 year ago

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BG3 playthrough - Wasting time at the southern checkpoint

Spoilers below

Guess who backtracked about 5 hours of game time because they only just discovered that the newspaper actually changes every day based on what you did that day, and now they need to go back and collect them all? This is why I’ve been playing since October, have over 500 hours on my steam account, and still haven’t finished one single playthrough yet…

I’ve been playing since October. Wow. This game has just totally taken over my brain. On the one hand it’s been amazing to have my brain so thoroughly distracted, cause things have been getting really rough, and I appreciate the distraction, so so much. But on the other hand… I do sometimes wish I could be spending all this effort doing something actually useful. Last year I had been making some progress on personal projects, and I’ve had no desire to touch it at all since October. Sigh.

After finishing the backtracking and collecting all the papers, guess who found Carm’s Garms and wasted a few hours dressing everyone up like barbie dolls? I am NEVER going to finish this game!!! Look, it’s not my fault that Astarion looks so fabulous in so many things. I think my favorite dye for him is the white and scarlet, but sometimes the black and furnace red has good results. My tav used to wear a lot of red but has lost his taste for it - reminds him too much of what he wore as a bhaalspawn. He’s been using the azure and blue dye a lot.

So of course I finished the Open Hand Temple investigation. That was super interesting but also super sad, more tiefling refugees getting shit on, and the only person who really cared about them got murdered for his trouble. I like the little touch that Astarion disapproves of any religious comments that you make: on brand. I only just noticed getting a statue made gives the subject a permanent buff. Enjoy, Astarion. (and everyone else in the camp: enjoy Astarion) Found Petras and Dalyria at the flophouse. Trying to kill each other - that’s how you know they’re really siblings.

Obviously if I was at the clothes shop, I ran into Naaber. Oh boy. I didn’t get the joke at first and was quite bowled over by how strange and out of place he is, though I did find it funny and listened to everything he had to say. Then I looked him up online and found out he’s a running gag brought over from BG2 which is funny… But I ALSO came across a discussion where people were, as far as I am able to tell, asking in complete earnest if there was any way to deal with him besides killing him. ??? Look I know there’s no “wrong” way to play and whatever way makes you happy is the right way, but like damn. WTF are some of you doing? He’s an annoying dude to be sure, but it is a LITTLE bit funny, and if you don’t like him, you don’t have to even talk to him at all. (right? It almost sounded from what people were saying that he was following them around being a nuisance, but he definitely didn’t follow me. Did he used to follow players in previous patches or something?)

And then I went to Sharess’ Caress. Boy oh boy, the devs really liked this location didn’t they, they put in a ton of detail, lol. It’s kind of funny how everyone wants to meet at Sharess’ Caress. I thought it was just a funny brothel, but apparently it’s a respectable taphouse as well, judging from how many people just hang out here / conduct business meetings? Or is this like the people who claim they like to go to Hooters for the wings? Anyways I adore the cat, I adore mamzell Amira, I adore the put-upon chef. I adore how Amira introduces Raphael and makes the services he’s offering sound ambiguous. I wonder if she knows full well what he’s actually doing in that room, but this is how she introduces him, and some poor asshole who just wants a quick blowjob gets talked into selling his soul instead, or if she really does just think he’s some kind of freelance gentleman whore, temporarily renting out a room from her. I can’t decide which is more funny.

Drow twins: god the dude is hilarious and the girl is interesting. I must have spent at least one solid half hour just reloading and trying out all the different dialogue branches with them. What do other races get to talk to them about, I wonder? Being a drow I had some options to ask about their history and how they ended up here, and also point out that Sorn’s Menzoberranzan Love Trick is just a name to make customers excited. I assume at least that non-drow characters have other paths to get to their backstory? I wasn’t able to see the foursome because I was romancing Astarion, and he’s not comfortable with that, but I checked them out each on their own. Everything with Sorn made me laugh and laugh. If you say you aren’t sure what you’re into, he chats with you a bit, and dark urge has a few extra little options that are so funny. The only thing I didn’t get to see was what happens if you fail the athletics or persuasion checks. Nym was kind of an interesting encounter - first you have the humour option of just complaining and crying to her for a couple hours, or you can actually just talk, listen to her talk about herself or get some weight off your own chest. If you choose to talk about boundaries, she will talk about how the female drow stereotype is a spicy dominatrix, but she doesn’t feel comfortable doing the rough stuff. That suits my drow just fine - as his boundary, a male drow can say he’s uncomfortable with dominant drow women. It was very interesting. And apparently my tav keeps his gauntlets on during sex. Not sure if that was a bug or on purpose but it was funny, lol.

That was just me checking things out for my personal curiosity anyways - in my actual save game, I didn’t do anything with either of them. I know Astarion says he’s ok if you fool around, and whether he actually is or not is debatable (he seems more comfortable here than when you talk to him about Halsin, IMO), but my tav just really has no interest if Astarion isn’t there.

I walked in on the nymph and her client… I had no idea what happened there so that was a shocking surprise.

I was stuck for a while trying to decide what to do about Raphael offering the contract. I had said that I would do anything in my game to trigger his hilarious little monologue at the epilogue party. It sounds like you must sign the contract then break it in order to get that. But everyone in the party is so freaking mad about it, I don’t have dialogue options to indicate I’m doing it fully intending on going back on it later, I don’t really want to deal with the Emperor being pissed off just yet, but if I lie to him, what do I do with Voss? Lie to him too? Man I dunno. I think it’s simpler just to tell Raphael to fuck off. Plus it’s also pretty funny to go and steal the hammer from him later. He’s the one who made me aware of the hammer: if he hadn’t mentioned it at all, I wouldn’t have known about it, but now that I know that he has it, BECAUSE HE TOLD ME, I’m going to go steal it? I just think that’s hilarious. Idiot.

HOWEVER IN THE END: I decided to do the contract. I have a second playthrough that I started and put on hold with a tiefling paladin, and since she would NEVER sign a contract with Raphael, I think I’ll make my durge do it. But besides just meta game reasons, I also reasoned… he just recently found out he’s a bhaalspawn, and I think he’s feeling like his crummy soul is forfeit. No big deal signing over his soul to a devil when he’s already completely fucked. Who knows, maybe Raphael and Daddy Bhaal will have a fistfight over it later and that would be hilarious. That’s where my tav is coming from.

I also did Gortash’s big fucking coronation but I’ll write that up as its own thing I think. Goddamn I am enjoying this game so much.

#bg3 #bg3 playthrough #bg3 spoilers #baldurs gate 3

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unabashednightmarepizza · 3 years ago

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𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙤𝙤𝙣 𝘾𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙎𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙒𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙄𝙩'𝙨 𝙎𝙪𝙣

A/N: Okay so I don't care if you guys will judge me but damn I had fallen for this Mister Bird Man and I thought like " Why the heck I won't write for this fine specimen?" So enjoy darlings, because that's gonna be a wild ride and there is probably gonna be another part! And a friendly reminder, when the italics start, please listen to "Only Love can hurt like this"...

Summary: After being alive for 20.000 years alonsgide your brothers, losing one, losing your parents,your home and Thanos snapping everyone, you were ready to take a break from everything. While having a different identity and a somehow normal life, you couldn't have guessed that a shy, Egyptian nerd would come to ask for your help which eventually led you to meet with someone you thought had betrayed you.

Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Pairings: Khonshu x Goddess!Reader( romantic); Steven Grant x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Marc Spector x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Jack Lockley x Goddess!Reader( Platonic); Layla El-Faouly x Goddess!Reader( Platonic)

"Thank you so much for covering for me, Leena! I don't know how I can pay you back..."

"Don't worry, darling! Just bring your daughter over for a play date and everything will be fine!"

You waved at the young mother who you called as your friend and watched her get out of the shop hurriedly. You sighed heavily and sat down to look at the many people passing by with a sad yet content smile. All of these people who didn't know anything about the snap just went on with their daily life and those who were aware of what happened were trying to adjust to life again. You were happy that everybody was safe and sound but remembering how two of your best friends died and the anguish you felt when you couldn't feel the heartbeat of your little brother Loki was...

You shook your head when someone came in and you immediately grabbed your apron to go to the front. You passed by a young girl who was struggling with college and feeling sympathy for her, you touched her forearm slightly to give a relief to her. She looked around curiously to see if there was something wrong around her, not being used to feeling so relaxed after days of stress. You called out her name, making her scared out of the thought that she did something wrong. Smiling reassuringly at her, you made a thumbs up at her.

" Don't stress over college that much! It's not that worth it and please go home early and rest! That's an order!"

She widened her eyes at you and with slight tears, nodded her head to go and change her outfit. A pair of brown eyes were watching your interraction with curiosity and wonder. He wasn't used to seeing such kindness on a complete stranger ever since his childhood. He slightly turned to the ancient God next to him to not catch any attention but just gaped at him since he was feeling... sadness? Love?

Can this sassy old God even love someone?

"Hey, just wondering? How do you know this woman and how can she help us?"

"And why are you being all mushy?"

"Marc Spector, if you talk about her like that one more time, this will be the last time you'll ever talk."

Steven raised a hand in surrender and just pouted, turning to look at you talking sweetly at a child, he couldn't help but think that you were just an ordinary girl who had a simple life as a barista who was kinda cute and motherly who was also great at making coffee.

Elegant look, kindness that could match even Gods, and good looks-

"Don't you dare to think nasty things, little worm!"

"Okay, easy there Murder Bird!"

He scoffed and wanted to throw a snarky comment at him but when they heard you laugh over your phone while holding your chest thightly, Steven jumped up on his seat at Khonshu growling loudly at you- no, to the one you're talking with.

"You know, Buck... I prevented a death today and I'd like to consider this as a character development!"

"Oh, yeah? How did you do it then, doll?"

"Self restraint, of course!"

You were idly fixing the tables while talking to Bucky who became a close friend to you after helping them for some time with the new Captain America. Even after you three parted ways, they were still a part of your daily life since your daughter loved Sam's corny jokes and your son adored how strong Bucky was. They both weren't used to someone so young, little yet strong kids look up to them, especially Bucky who thought that he wasn't a good man that deserved praise. Before you could scold him for laughing at your answer, you visibly beamed at hearing your son and daughter over the phone, both of them laughing joyfully.

"Is that momma you're talking? We want to talk too!"

"Yes, Uncle Bucky! We want to!"

You sat down and looked at the many pastries before you absent-mindedly while Bucky was trying to set the excited kids down to let them speak to you. He couldn't exactly blame them for their excited fidgetings since it's been a long time they saw you and he wasn't sure if he could keep up with their powers and smartness any longer.

Being born to the two strong Gods wasn't that easy. The spiritualness, smartness, and limitless power the duo held between their little hands were inmeasurable and that made you worry more than anything in the life. Who knew what would happen to them if humans learnt about them? Or your enemies? Would you be able to protect them from the harsh world?

You winced when a particular harsh and angry scream erupted from your daughter. Heart pounding hard in your ribcage, you asked if everything was all right when Bucky told you that she got angry at her brother for pulling on her hair and threw a blue and white ball at him?

"Wait... Did you just say a ball of blue and white?"

"Uhh, yeah, doll... That's exactly what I said but- Hey? Y/N? Are you there?"

"Ah, yes I am! I think I should come there quickly though... I guess her powers are starting to appear and I need to be there to calm her."

Sighing heavily to yourself, you touched the star necklace around your neck to find some solace and comfort midst your anxiety attack. Remembering your one and only love used to bring a painful stab to your heart and an inexplicable feeling of revenge and hatred but now, there was just a hollow emptiness inside where your heart used to be. Your eyes started to sting, your heart paced faster at the memory of you two's last day together.

The late night sky was shining with the bright twinkling light of millions of stars. The purple galaxies across the endless universe and constellations was such a sight to behold that you just admired what your lover created while swinging your feet in the river. Your father, Odin, was pretty much angry at this relationship you two created, stating that you were a princess and therefore deserved the best, strongest God as your husband... and preferably a human one. You giggled at the memory of you yelling at him so hard that your beloved Sun almost scorched the whole Asgard. You could even feel the air shifting around you and hearing what sounded like a coo and awe, you felt your cheeks turn a sweet shade of pink before sprinting out of the Great Hall to visit your lover in his realm.

And now here you were, throwing your head back fondly to look at the endless sky. Seeing your grumpy yet sweet lover, you smiled so wide that it made even the aloof God smile at your small form. It was hard, being with a 8 feet God while you were hardly 5'7 but somehow you managed by finding that he can posses a human body. You didn't like the idea that much since he was using a poor guy who didn't know anything and you loved the true form of him more than anything.

"My Goddess, why are you smiling so hard for?"

You hugged yourself hard when you heard his deep and raspy voice while he was holding his staff between his hands and folding his legs to sit next to you. Looking up at him and kissing his beak softly, you took his long arm between yours and looked at the lake before you which was painted with a deep night blue which was lighted by the little fireflies.

"Nothing, My God... Just thinking about my father and you."

"Hmm... I hope you don't think about pranking him with your brother, my star."

"Ah, never never! Me, the Goddess of Sun, Power and Eternal Life, is going to prank the Father of all Gods? No way!"

A deep chuckle rumbled inside his chest and vibrated to your own smaller figure which made you close your eyes peacefully. Inhaling and exhaling slowly, you made the most with the time you two had before you went back to the palace to work with your mother. Looking at the hollow eye-sockets of your lover, you made an attempt at speaking first. But before you could open your mouth, he beat you into it.

"My Moon, My Star... You do know of how much I love you, right?"

You looked at him with your pointer finger up, mouth forming a shocked "o" shape at the voice of the God of Moon and Vengeance, the one who would throw snarky comments and annoy everyone sounded so... insecure and unsure. The realization made you look at him in sadness and also curiousty, wondering why he brought this up so suddenly.

Turning your head to the big and shining Moon, you looked back at the God that was your lover who was looking down at you, waiting for an answer. You couldn't probably see it that well, but internally, he was at the verge of freaking out. Eveey second you weren't answering was like a year of torment, a million swords piercing his body at everywhere. He knew he was rough around the edges, that you deserved a more romantic lover who wouldn't yell over you when you fluster him, or someone you could cuddle easily, walk around easily... The list was a long one, and unfortunately, Odin threatining the absolute shit out of him if he didn't leave you was good enough as reason to be sentimental.

"Leave my daughter alone, you little God! How can you possibly think that you're good enough for her?!"

He still remembered how your mother tried to calm him down while he was walking back to where he came from, mind already clouded by what he was supposed to talk to you. He wasn't gonna just leave you like that just because Odin told him to. Heck, he felt like he found the other half of his existence! You, with your bubbly personality, caring self, smile full of love and eyes that couldn't even rival the brightness of his Moon were everything to him.

And he would rip out his own heart if it meant that you could be together, even if it was in another galaxy.

"You know... The Moon actually shines thanks to the Sun, and without the Moon, Sun wouldn't have such a meaning to anyone except brightining around while burning itself for the sake of others..."

Khonshu looked at you with what you assumed as wonder and a deep love, your bond being strong with him. You definetly have a way with your words, my little one, he thought while gently caressing your hair. He hummed at you, urging you to go on and you grabbed his hand. Putting something a little heavy in his hand, Khonshu tilted his head to left and opened it, only to see a sun-shaped golden necklace. Looking at you for any affirmation, you just nodded your head and got up to put it on his body, right in the middle of his Moon Symbol.

" You're the reason I don't loose myself, the reason I always give life and enlighten paths for people. I'd like to think that we both complete each other and... I really don't believe my life would have such a meaning if you weren't in... there..."

You blushed and shied away from him, taking a few steps back when you felt him freeze and get tense. You beat yourself in your mind for speaking so carelessly and pouring your heart out at him. You two weren't even in that part of your relationship! You didn't even mutter any "I love you"s to each other, and you had to go and utter such words! Idiot YN!

" Why?"

He didn't know why exactly he said that, I mean you literally serenaded to him and he asked "why?". But he really wondered the reason. You were such a powerful God, beauty that could rival Helen of Troy, or Aphrodite and Hathor and every Goddess all around the realm yet, you chose to be with him. You chose to love him, cherish him 'till the day you'd die and felt so strongly about him that you even created your very own hidden heaven just for you two to come and love each other.

Knitting your eyebrows, you smiled sweetly and kissed his forehead. Lingering there a few second, you took a step back and put his hand on your chest, right where your heart was.

"Because I'm in love with you."

And just like that, he pulled you to his lap and smelled your every part, he always thought that even though there was a heart, nothing could make it beat so loudly. Not protecting humans, not ripping hearts, not Hathor's music, nothing.

Except you...

"My Moon, be mine. Let me make you mine and cherish you forever in the presence of our love for each other."

Feeling every inch of love he had for you through his lovesick voice, you nodded at him with slight tears. Bandaged hands started to caress your body and took you in his arms to go where your palace was residing. You couldn't help but caress the skull and whisper to him.

"Silly, Don't you know I've always been yours..?"

And the Moon shone so bright that it was visible even in the morning and the Sun was shining in such a warm yet strong way that people were curious yet happy since their days will go with peace. You two made your bond stronger by making love to each other for the first time, both in his true form and in a human, laughed freely and happily, not caring about how you'll be in trouble for all the bruises he gave to you but you were fine. You had your lover here, with you, soon to be married for eternal life... Turning to look at him, you softly kissed his jaw and closed your eyes for the sleep to take you over...

Not knowing that the Sun you adored so much would loose its spark in a matter of seconds, and the heart that was once filled with love would be nothing but a heart that screamed for one thing:

Revenge.

*****

"Lee! There is a creepy looking guy and a sweet girl looking straight at you for the past 30 minutes! Shall we call the police!?"

When a co-worker whisper yelled at you, you almost fell of the chair, if not for grabbing the table at the last minute. You looked at her with wide eyes, almost hearing what seemed like an amused chuckle and she got panicked, stuttering over her words while trying to apologize but you cut her off to understand who she was talking about and where that damn chuckle was coming from.

"What man and woman? Where? Show me, show me!"

"Right behind you but don't be too... Obvious..."

She sighed annoyed when you turned abruptly to look at what she was talking about, and you saw a curly-haired woman who had a sweet yet awkward smile and a man looking at you as if you were his next prey with soft curls that fell on his forehead. By the look of his eyes, you could guess that he was somehow in a lot of wars or jobs that included killing, not serial killer since he wouldn't come with a girl to observe his victim, maybe a mercinary or something like that.

Keeping the eye contact, you turned on where you were sitting and looked at them with whole of your body turned to them, legs dangling both sides of the chair. Leaning down a little bit more, you tilted your head to see if any of them would stop looking, whether it was out of discomfort or their human eyes finally loosing the batte against being dry for so long.

"Are we going to keep staring at each other until your eyes will dry so hard that not even water would help, or are you going to stop?"

And you smirked in victory when both of them groaned out in discomfort, rubbing their eyes to ease the pain. You chuckled and grabbed your eye drop for dry eyes, whistling at them, you threw it at the girl while fixing your clothes.

"You know, staring at people is rude and you even kept looking at me when I clearly warned you? You got some real guts, darlings!"

You stood in front of them, folding your arms in front of your chest, waiting for them to finish dropping the eye drop. You turned your head to the back slightly and smiled at your co-workers to let them know that everything was fine and that you were going to deal with the duo. Taking off your notebook and pencil, you waited for them to talk so you can just go and prepare their orders and go back to your place to your kids.

"Okay, gentleman, my lady, what may I bring you?"

"Look, we aren't here for-"

"An Iced-Latte and Americano would be great! Right, Marc?"

You looked at them with a bored yet curious gaze and raising your brow at the look the woman was giving him, thight lips with half wide eyes that screamed for him to shut up, you shrugged your shoulders and wrote their orders. Smiling at their way, you went back to your place and started to prepare what they wanted while trying not to laugh at their banter.

"Look, I know you want to ease into the talk but we don't really have time! Harrow is right on our tail and-"

"And freaking her out would be no help, Marc! If she really is who she is, than she already knows everything just let us get her trust!"

Oh My, What could two mortals do with a God?, you thought, while twisting your rings anxiously. You could just march up right there, tell them to go away since they'd be throwing themselves into more danger by being with you but your mind couldn't help but wonder: Who was this Harrow and how do they know who you are?

Meanwhile, a certain ancient God was right behind you, with his staff planted on the marble floor firmly. He extended a bandaged hand out to you, wanting to touch the face he dreamed of seeing again for all these centuries but he looked at you in shock since his hand just... slipped through you. He shuffled where he was standing and clutched the sun shaped necklace on his chest thightly, as if he was in pain. He didn't understand, do you not see him? Was he wrong about this woman being you? Did you forget about him?

Marc, thinking that Khonshu was right behind him, turned to question the God but when he saw that there was no one, he frantically looked around, finding him right next to you, trying to touch you and fail miserably. He nudged Layla and they both looked at him curiously while Layla was sad. She frowned at the scene since the snarky, grumpy God looked like a little kid trying to grab his mother and that he was somehow looking at her with pure sadness and a sullen look. Layla turned to Marc and leaned down to his ear to speak what was in her mind.

"Do you think... Maybe they have a shared past? It's not normal for him to be so... depressed."

"I don't know but I guess we're about to find out..."

You shivered slightly and looked around to see if there was any open windows than necessary and upon finding none, you grabbed their drinks and walked towards them. Smiling to yourself at the delighted look on the woman's face which made you smile softly at her even more and before you could go and change your outfit, she called out to you.

"U-Uh, Miss! Can we talk a little bit!"

"Uh... Sure, just let me change quickly okay?"

When you came from the back room and sat down in front of them, you could see that the man next to her was no longer the one you saw earlier. Sure, the body was the same but the look he was giving were shy? Anxious, and a little bir excited?

"Sorry for asking this but... Are you Egyptian?"

"Uh, yeah! I am and my friend here is-"

"You sure?"

They both looked at you with their mouths hanging open widely, the man spilling his coffee almost over himself and you gighled delightfuly at their shocked faces while handing a napkin to the poor man who thanked you stuttering.

"Ahh, that's the best part of the day! But seriously, your pheromone levels are quite high to be just friends and I'm not dumb... Actually I didn't mean the sexual tension you both have, more like you used a singular word whereas there are 3 people in one body..."

"Holy Fuck, she really is a Goddess!"

"Shhh, you idiot! Don't shout thing like that!"

You closed his mouth with your hand and looked around you anxiously to see if there was anyone who heard you. You sighed in relief since most people were outside and sat back down on your seat. Looking at them with hooded eyes and a tired look, you lifted your head to look at the woman before you.

"Look, sweetheart... I don't know who do you think I am or how much you know about me but I'm not the one to help you..."

"Wait, please! We know you faced many shit but you have to listen to us, you're the only one that could help us and if you don't want to help, then we'll let you go!"

Layla would have pressured you into listening to them more, even using harsh words but the look on your eyes touched her heart deeply. The tired eyes,dull look that screamed to let go of you... They were the same eyes she used to have and even though she didn't have a great sense of feeling people's emotions, she was sure as hell that you have been through a lot.

Thinking about her offer for a minute, you looked at the door and to them, trying to decide which option was better. To be honest, walking through that door and never looking back was a good idea. You didn't even know these people, you owed nothing to them to accept their offer and you weren't in the mood to deal with a bunch of kids... But the desperation and scared look in their eyes, even though they tried to hide it, was clear and that made you sit straight on your seat. Whining and pinching the bridge of your nose, you nodded and accepted to talk.

The woman, who later told you her name was Layla, smiled in gratitude and looked at the man beside her, who was Steven who had three alters, to speak since things were about to get complicated.

"Okay so, even I don't really understand what really is going on but one time I woke up in the middle of a meadow, got chased down by people and was holding a dung beetle. Later, I saw a man who was talking about the other world, the after life and then used a cane and then sucked the life out of a woman, saying that maybe bad thing will happen in the future and then everyone screamed-"

"All Hail Ammit, right?"

"Yes! But how did you..?"

"Ammit is the ancient Egyptian God that devoured the soul of those who she deemed unworthy. Eater of Hearts, Devourer of the Dead... Please, continue with your story, Steven Grant."

" And I don't know they were after the dung beetle and when I opened it, it just started to fly around, there is a God that wants me to be his avatar, well actually Marc is his but since he's inside my body, I kinda am his avatar too... And how do you know my surname, I didn't even tell you!?"

You sighed lovingly at the man who forgot that you were a Goddes yourself and waited for him to realize his mistake and when he did, he blushed so hard that he just wanted to crawl under the blankets and hide there forever. You pat his hand softly, telling him that it was okay and asked him to show you the beetle. Inspecting it while turning it upside down, you started to murmur to yourself.

" The ancient Egyptians identified this with creation, the indisputable strength of masculinity, procreation, wisdom, reincarnation, immortality and renewal... Ammit has been imprisoned for centuries and if there is a man, using her powers to collect souls... and thinking of the meaning of dung beetle... It's obvious that this Harrow man is trying to set her free, Steven..."

You gave it back to him and rubbed your face while thinking. The Egyptian Gods have always been into chaos more than anyone, being like little children and all that. They never gathered around one topic or aim, resulting in more chaos. They didn't even care about humanity anymore, opting to observe them through their avatars and even then, they didn't really give a single fuck about them. Always thinking so highly of themselves, looking down at humans... No wonder you hated their guts.

If this man would set Ammit free... You didn't want to imagine what would happen to the world.

"But... How can we stop them? We don't even know any God except you and you might not even help-"

"Who told you I'm not gonna help? I mean sure I'd have loved to have the retired life but... Unfortunately, if you come face to face with the other Gods, they wouldn't be nice to you... and probably wouldn't listen either. With me in the picture, they'd have no choice but listen."

"And Miss Lee... Since you're gonna help, can we learn your real name and identity please? If that's... okay?"

Looking at her sharply, you looked down and up at her, knowing that you were making them anxious second by second. Grinning joyfully, you nodded your head and popped a lollipop into your mouth, extending your hand out for her to shake.

"Nice to meet you, Layla El-Faouly! I'm the Goddess of Sun, Power snd Immortal Life... Daughter of Odin and Frigga, elder sister of Thor and Loki, a mother of two children and a woman who is this close to loose her shit."

She laughed at your way of introducing and watched you hug Steven to yourself lovingly, patting his head softly and praising him for being smart enough to find you. He curiously looked at your right and you turned your eyes at where he was looking but seeing no one, you ssked him what he was looking at.

"Oh, nothing! It's just... we didn't find you, he showed you to us..."

"He? Who?"

"It's the God of-"

Everyone inside the shop screamed when multiple bullets sounded around. Protecting Layla and Steven, tucking their head under your arms, you looked around to see a man with a cane walking towards you three. Creating a light shield around them, you took tentaive steps to the man looking at you with a fond smile. Feeling uneasy of his presence, you took out your staff and directed it to him. He stopped where the end of your sun staff ended, he bowed in front of you.

"O' the strong Goddess of the West, the one who enlightens paths and give what they desire, I find such pleasure in meeting the daughter of Odin..."

"As much as I like being praised, I really would rather you talk to me standing up, Arthur Harrow."

Smiling at you, he got up and after setting your staff down, he kissed your hand softly which made you raise a brow at his action. Meanwhile, Steven and Marc was having a headache over Khonshu screaming right next to him.

"IF YOU LET HIM TOUCH HER ONE MORE TIME, MARC SPECTOR, STEVEN GRANT, I'LL TEAR DOWN EVERY SINGLE MUSCLE OUT OF YOU!!"

Not being aware of what was happening behind you, Arthur started to talk while looking at you in astonishment.

"I never thought I'd see the day I'd be in front of such power but even someone like me can get lucky from time to time..."

"Cut the bullshit, darling... Enough of the praises, I already know why you're here."

"Then you also know that I've come here to convince you to join-"

"Who do you think you are, convincing me? I am the one that will decide on what I'll do and I'm the only one who will decide whether you're telling truth or not!"

Layla and Steven let out a wow at your voice echoing all around, and your body shining in an angry orange and red, Arthur's men took a few steps back but he only came closer to you with a manic grin. Directing your staff at him again, he didn't care and continued to talk.

"Oh, I can see why such a power is coming from you... Who would have guessed that a Goddess can have revenge inside of her so powerful that it's enough to burn everything?"

"I don't have revenge or anything like that inside me, watch your tongue, boy..."

"Oh, but you do. The fall of your home, your brother and your friends, being betrayed by the one you thought who loved you... So many sins have been committed against you..."

"Shut up..."

"I know the feeling... The same God who spoke such lovely words to you, whispering his love and affections also deceived me as well..."

Well, that caught your attention. Did he even know what he was talking about? Did he really know Khonshu at some point? You looked him up and down to see if he was throwing any lies at you but you saw... none.

With wide eyes, you lowered your guard and looked at him with big, shaky eyes. Seeing that he was getting under your skin, Marc took over an tried to break the shield that surrounded them.

"Do you... really know him? I mean-"

"Khonshu? The ever changing God? Yes, my dear... I know him and how he betrayed me just like how he betrayed you..."

Marc grunted in pain and cursed at you for creating such a strong shield. And the fact that Khonshu was screaming and trashing out didn't help.

"MARC! SAVE HER FROM HIS CLUTCHES!"

"Who is that woman to you anyways?! WHY ARE YOU SO-"

"BECAUSE SHE'S MY WIFE, YOU IDIOT!

"YOUR FUCKING WHAT?!!"

Before Arthur would try and touch you with his filthy hands, you heard the breaking of your shield and it was as if something switched back on. Growling at the man before you, you punched him hard from the balls and threw him away from you. Fighting against the men surrounding you, you turned to look at Steven and Layla to see if they were fine but what you saw made you falter and silently cry...

For the same bandages and Moon shape was on Steven, and your husband standing right in front of you protectively with a pleading and crushed look...

#marvel x you #marvel x gender neutral reader #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #moon knight imagine #moon knight x reader #steven grant imagine #steven grant x reader #marc spector imagine #marc spector x reader #khonshu imagine #khonshu x reader #bucky barnes #thor #loki

1K notes · View notes

h0tchner · 3 years ago

Text

Any Age, Any Day, Anywhere (Part 1) - aaron hotchner x fem!reader

pairing: aaron hotchner x fem!reader

summary: WRITTEN FOR AN ANON REQUEST: "ok hi so u already wrote a jealous reader and was wondering whats your take on jealous hotch? i mostly see him in fics as possessive and yeah being the leader type i would think he could also be possessive but i also think that he would just be sad like ya know he doubts himself as we saw in some episodes and i think he would need assurance and a lot of convincing that u only love him but if you’ve given that to him then thats the time he would be possessive and god i would love to imagine a possessive and feral aaron hotchner"

word count: 3.5k

includes: kissing, so much freaking adorable fluff, talk of body insecurities, insecure!hotch, protective!hotch, wifey reader, super brief mentions of pregnancy, alcohol, confrontation with a drunk asshole (derek & hotch are all over it tho dw), party at papa rossi's!, smut to come in next chapter...

rating: 18+ (technically there is no smut in this part, but there are adult themes such as drinking, kissing, etc.).

a/n: HELLO BESTIES! This is part one of a two-part fic! The next part will be pure filth, so keep your eyes peeled for some feral hotch content... ALSO! PLS (!!!!!!!!!!!) interact if you liked this, rb, comment, like and/or send me a request if you have ideas for future fics! i love y’all! - rivka💞

“Aaron! Can you come here for a sec?” you call out to your husband from the bathroom, muttering curses under your breath as you try (and fail) for the third time to zip up the back of your black cocktail dress.

“Sure, I just need a minute,” he replies from the bedroom closet, securing the last opalescent button on the arm of his white dress shirt. He looks at himself in the closet mirror, zeroing in at the bags under his eyes and the sprinkling of grey in his stubble. He looks… tired. Tired and old. And he hates it.

Even though Aaron is only in his late-40s, he has lived lifetimes; years of working as Unit Chief of the BAU will do that to a man. Every horror he’s seen and every person he’s lost has weighed on his body and mind. In the past few months, amidst work changes and a new baby, he’s been exhausted and in fear that he’s letting himself go. Of course, being the stoic man that he is, he’s done his absolute best to hide these feelings from you. Tonight, however, he doesn’t know if he can. It’ll be your first night out together as a couple since welcoming baby girl Hotchner to the family four months ago. With no pressing family or work distractions, he just knows that you’ll be able to sense his apprehensions. It’s only a matter of when.

Taking in a breath, he turns a little to the side, frowning at his profile. Aaron winces a little at his “dad bod,” but quickly recovers from the discomfort, milliseconds after it flashes across his face.

“Aaron Hotchner get your handsome butt in here and help me zip my dress! We’re gonna be late,” you exclaim, trying one last time to reach the zipper before giving up and crossing your arms in defeat. You lean back lightly against the countertop facing the door, letting the fabric slip off your shoulders, and wait for your husband to rescue you from the hell that is this dress.

At the sound of your voice, Aaron snaps out of his trance. He shakes his head lightly, as if to physically erase the intrusive thoughts, and clears his throat. Grabbing his suit jacket off the hanger, he flicks off the closet light and closes the door behind him.

Languidly, he meanders from the closet toward the bathroom. He drags his feet a little longer than he normally would, still feeling off and a little bit shy about his appearance.

“Aaron,” you sing, “I’m waiting for –,” your jaw drops mid-sentence when Aaron appears in the doorway.

“Oh fuck,” you breathe out before you can stop yourself, eyes widening at the sight of the gorgeous man in front of you.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, crossing over to you, searching your face for any ounce of reprieve.

“Nothing, nothing’s wrong,” you’re quick to reply, standing from your leaning position to meet him, holding out your hands.

He takes them in his own, cocking his head slightly, his soft hazel eyes boring into yours.

You shift forward, moving up on your toes to peck his soft pink lips.

He sighs into the kiss, feeling the warmth of your lips against his own. It feels so good that it almost makes him forget about how he is feeling… almost. But the dark thoughts come back, and he pulls away from you a bit, reluctantly.

Aaron clears his throat.

“You called me?” He questions, but it sounds more like a fact.

“Yeah,” you give his hands a squeeze. “I needed you to zip up my dress, but now,” you lean in again, “I kinda want you to rip it off me.” You offer him a sultry smirk, moving your hands up to rest on his broad chest. He moves his hands to settle on your hips.

You lick your lips and let your eyes rake over his body, taking in every ounce of his sexy frame. The way his crisp, white dress shirt hugs his solid body makes you go weak in the knees. His strong, toned legs in those black dress pants? Yes please. His soft black hair and salt and pepper stubble on his face are practically begging to be touched. He looks good. Damn good.

“You look…” you pause, tapping a finger lightly against his pectoral, searching for the right word, “…delicious.”

Aaron blushes lightly at your ogling, offering you a sad smile as he squeezes his eyes shut out of embarrassment.

You sense the falter in his demeanor, knowing that there’s something else nagging at him far beyond his usual flustering when you vocalize your attraction to him.

“Honey,” you implore, looping your hands around his neck to bring his forehead down to touch yours. “What’s going on in that big, beautiful brain of yours?”

“It’s nothing,” he mutters, swallowing, rubbing soft circles into your sides.

“It’s something,” you counter, carding a hand through his hair at the nape of his neck. You scratch lightly at his scalp, waiting for him to speak. You’ve learned that the best thing to do when Aaron gets in a mood is to give him some time to gather his thoughts. Keeping him close, physically, is a way to show him some comfort without pressuring him to speak. It encourages him, without words, that your arms are a safe place.

“I don’t…” he starts, and then stops himself. His dark eyebrows furrow and his mouth presses into a thin line.

“Mhm?” you question, fingers still tangled in his thick, black locks.

He pulls his forehead away from yours and locks eyes with you. You let your hands be still now, a silent gesture to show him that you’re listening.

He takes in a breath.

“I don’t look the way I used to,” he says quietly, shifting his eyes away from yours.

“What do you mean,” you urge him to continue.

“I mean, I don’t look like I did five years ago. Two years ago. Four months ago. I mean, I was practically a different man when we first met. I was younger, fitter…” he trails off, visibly upset.

“Yes, Aaron, you were,” you agree, keeping your tone temperate.

His eyes snap to yours, confused. It’s clear that was not what he was expecting you to say.

“You were a different man,” you continue gently, resuming your pacifying touch in his hair, “and I was a different woman.”

Aaron lets out a huff.

“Do you love me any less now than you did five years ago?” You ask him.

“Of course not,” he’s quick to answer.

“Why is that?” You prod.

“You’re gorgeous, inside and out. You’re funny, smart, loving…” he begins, but you interrupt him before he can go on.

“And,” you butt in, “if I were to go completely grey, gain thirty pounds, and only wear a potato sack to work every day would you love me any less?”

Aaron huffs again, but this time he’s fighting a smile. He’s starting to catch on. You watch as a spark of levity returns to his eyes. He holds you a little tighter.

“No. There’s nothing you could do or say to make me love you any less,” he grumbles in annoyance, but his upturned lip and matching eyebrow tell a different story.

“Ditto, baby,” you smile up at him. “I love you at any age, any day, anywhere, and there is nothing in the world that can make me change my mind.”

He dips down then, capturing you in a kiss, grinning against your lips.

You giggle as Aaron works his way down your jawline and neck, gasping as he kisses the soft skin at the junction of your neck and shoulder, thick fingers gripping the sides of your hips. He moves his lips back up to your earlobe, nipping at it lightly as you let out another soft gasp.

“You always know the right thing to say,” he whispers into your ear, pressing another kiss right underneath it.

“Aaron, I know I said I wanted you to take this dress off me,” you say breathlessly as Aaron nips at your shoulder again, “but Rossi will kill us if we don’t show up tonight. Plus, I really want the chance to show off my super sexy FBI husband. It’s been far too long.”

He lets out a low groan into your skin and gives your hips a squeeze, nuzzling his head into your neck.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, “you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always,” you snort, eliciting a chuckle from your husband as you turn around in his arms to let him zip you up.

He takes his time, letting his fingers brush lightly over your spine as he draws the zipper over your back. When he’s done and the clasp is latched, he kisses one shoulder lightly, and then the other.

“Thank you,” you whisper, leaning back against his warm body.

“No, honey,” he kisses the top of your head, “thank you.”

_____________________________________________________________

By the time you and Aaron arrive at Rossi’s mansion, the party is already in full swing. Judging by the number of cars in the makeshift parking lot on his spacious front lawn, there must be at least fifty, maybe even a hundred people here.

Despite the bustle of the evening, it doesn’t take long for you two to find Emily, Penelope, and Derek in the living room, drinks in hand, snacking on some very expensive looking food.

“Hey, look! It’s the Hotchners!” Emily cheers, teetering on the arm of the leather couch, wine glass in hand.

“Hello beautiful BAU power-couple!” Penelope chimes in from the seat next to her, cuddled up into Derek’s side.

You laugh and let go of Aaron’s hand, walking over to greet your friends.

“Hey hot stuff, look at you, look at you!” Derek chimes in, eyeing you up and down before standing to shake Aaron’s hand.

“Oh, please,” you roll your eyes at him as you give Emily a big hug.

“And you don’t look bad yourself, boss man!” Derek adds.

You shoot your husband an ‘I told you so’ look over your shoulder, before untangling your arms from Emily and giving Penelope an equally enthusiastic squeeze.

“It’s good to see you all,” Aaron smiles lightly, all dimples in the low light. He steps in to give Emily and Penelope soft hugs.

“Let’s go get you a drink,” Derek says to Aaron, clapping him on the back.

“White?” Aaron looks to you, even though he already knows the answer.

“Yes please,” you respond, “thank you.”

“Be back soon,” he smiles easily, kissing your cheek, making your heart ache.

Aaron and Derek turn and exit the room together.

Penelope drunkenly pats the seat next to her, and you plop down on the couch.

“We’ve missed you like this!” Emily exclaims, gesturing between the three of you and around the room. “I can’t believe we’ve had to wait nine whole months plusanother four just to have a drink with our best friend again.”

You laugh at her, tilting your head back lightly. “Well, you guys got a beautiful little niece out of it, doesn’t that make up for all the wild girl’s nights I missed?”

Emily sighs, dramatically, “I guess so,” she jests.

“Oh, for sure.” Penelope adds. “You look freaking gorgeous, by the way. I mean, I would have never guessed you were creating a tiny human in that body only a few months ago!”

You blush lightly at her words, “You flatter me far too much, Pen. I owe this,” you gesture down at your figure, “all to Spanx!”

“Amen!” Emily toasts. You raise an imaginary glass to theirs and pretend to clink, taking a swig of invisible liquid.

“Are J.J. and Will here?” You ask them after they’ve had a few more sips of their wine.

“Yeah, yeah,” Emily nods, “they’re around somewhere.”

You take a moment and look around the room, taking in all the sights and the sounds of the party. You see some faces you recognize from around the bureau, but others you don’t. Just as you’re about to turn back to your friends, someone catches your eye. One face stands out from the crowd: he’s a young, suave-looking man in a sharp navy suit. Sandy hair perfectly gelled, shiny brown loafers, and bright blue eyes looking right at you. In another life you would have been exhilarated by his attention, apparent charm, and good looks, but now? Now, you’re married to the love of your life with an amazing stepson and a wonderful baby girl. His wolfish gaze means absolutely nothing to you. You simply flash him a curt smile and turn back to Emily and Penelope without a second thought.

You and your friends resume your chatter, waiting for the men to return with more drinks... only they don’t. Perhaps its “new mother anxiety” talking, but the longer your husband is gone, the more you start to grow concerned. A few more minutes pass of antics, laughter, and catching up until the nagging voice in the back of your head turns into an all-out scream. All you know is that you’re suddenly feeling very overwhelmed need to be with Aaron. So, you announce to your friends that you’re going to hunt down Derek and your husband.

You stand from the couch and smooth out the skirt of your dress with the promise to be back in a few minutes.

You walk out of the living room and into the grand foyer, following the same route as Aaron had earlier. Your black kitten heels click on the marble flooring, the skirt of your dress swishing lightly as you walk with purpose towards the kitchen. You’re so concentrated on reaching your destination that you don’t realize the man who had been watching you in the living room was now hot at your heels, following you through the house. It’s only when a hand reaches out and jerks your arm backward that you stop, startled, just past the grand staircase, turning face to face with him.

“You’re not an easy woman to get alone,” he smirks, reeking of alcohol, still gripping your arm, tight. Up close he is decidedly not as handsome as the low light of the living room made him seem. In fact, he seems… creepy. Really, really, really, creepy.

“Can I help you?” You blink at him, pulling your arm out of his vice grip.

“You sure can, baby,” he steps closer to you, voice oozing with sleaze. You gag at the liquor on his breath.

Moving away, you scowl at him, crossing your arms across your chest.

“What’s say you and I head upstairs for a little while? I’m dying to get my hands on your body.” He jerks his head toward the staircase, reaching out to grab your arm again.

You’re fuming at this point, ready give him a piece of your mind when a stern voice beats you to it.

“Excuse me, what do you think you’re doing?” Aaron articulates, approaching you both with Derek not far behind.

You breathe a sigh of relief as your husband glares at the drunken man vengefully, coming to stand by your side. Aaron pulls you into him, roughly, hand tight around your waist. The anger radiating off your husband is equally terrifying and HOT.

“Take a walk, man,” Derek adds in, coming to stand next to the drunken asshole. The man looks from you, to Aaron, then over to Derek, and finally back at you.

“Whatever,” the man grumbles, putting his hands up, “she’s not worth it anyway. Not pretty enough for the hassle. I just thought she looked like an easy lay.”

“That’s enough,” Aaron snaps, seething. “Leave now, before I make you,” your husband growls. He angles his body forward so you’re slightly behind him. A shiver passes through you at his fierce protectiveness.

“Fine, I’m going to get another drink,” the man utters.

“No,” Aaron interjects, “the party. Leave the party or I’ll have you removed.”

“What’s your problem?” The creepy man retorts, this time, more confrontationally.

“My problem?” Aaron says, angrily. You feel his entire body tense at the accusation.

“Hotch,” Derek warns, “I’ll take care of it. You guys go enjoy yourselves. Forget about him.”

“Come on, Aaron,” you tug on his suit jacket lightly, eyes pleading… but Aaron doesn’t budge from his spot. He only holds you tighter as he continues to stare down the man as Derek ushers him away and towards the front door. He doesn’t falter until they are out of sight.

“Aaron?” You repeat.

He looks down at you, finally, blinking away the fury until all that’s left is an all-consuming love. He releases you from his protective hold, and you face him.

“I’m okay,” you assure him in earnest, letting out a shaky breath.

“Honey, I’m so sorry,” he breathes, bringing his hands up to cup your face.

“Aaron, it’s okay, really,” you bite your lip, shifting your eyes away from his.

“You’re so beautiful,” Aaron kisses your forehead, and then the top of your head. “So, so beautiful, and I’m so sorry.”

“Aaron, can we just go home?” You ask.

“Sure,” he kisses your head one last time before weaving his fingers between yours and guiding you gently toward the back exit.

_____________________________________________________________

The car ride home is quiet. The only sounds are the occasional click of the turn signal, and the hum of the wheels on the road. Aaron is still upset, and so are you, but you’re also… something else. Something you can’t quite put your finger on. You feel guilty for ruining the evening, guilty that you FEEL guilty for something you had no control over, hungry, tired, and… horny? Oh, and guilty for feeling horny.

It isn’t helping that one of Aaron’s hands is planted firmly on your thigh. He lifts it only to adjust the air conditioning or to scratch his nose, but otherwise it remains on you the whole way home. When he pulls into the driveway of your shared house, and shuts the car off, he still doesn’t move it.

“Honey?” You turn your head to look at him. His eyes are closed. You take in the strong features of his profile, noting the prominence of his nose and the way his eyelashes rest on his high cheekbones.

“I almost punched him.” Aaron whispers, opening his eyes to look over at you sheepishly.

“You what,” you exhale, mouth slightly agape.

“That guy,” he continues, bringing his left hand up to pinch his nose. “I almost punched him for saying that about you.”

You snort, amused by his confession.

Your husband lets out a short laugh, squeezing your thigh as he does.

“I would’ve liked to see that.” You’re grinning now and so is he.

He flashes his eyes at you and laughs again, this time less anxiously. You join him, feeling the tension dissipate with every passing moment.

“My big, bad FBI man decking a barely-legal drunk dickhead for making a move on his wife? Where can I get my tickets?” You joke.

As you say the words “his wife,” Aaron’s breath hitches in his throat. His hand on your thigh presses down instinctively. Neither of his reactions go unnoticed.

You lay a hand over his where it rests on your leg.

“You know, Aaron,” you begin.

He looks over at you, jaw tight, but this time it isn’t from anger.

“This is the first time we’ve had the house all to ourselves in months,” you pull his hand off you and bring it up to your lips. You press a kiss to his palm, and then to his wrist.

“This… is true,” he breathes out, studying you, taking you in.

“So, I’m just wondering:” you grin, linking your fingers with his, “are you going to carry your wife into our house, Aaron? Or do I have to walk myself?”

462 notes · View notes

golbrocklovely · 3 years ago

Text

never needed // colby brock

A/N: so fun fact about this fic is that i came up with it last year back in november. it was around the time me and my ex best friend stopped being friends. i was really in such a rough headspace, and i think the concept shows it. i just finished writing it today and wow... i still feel this way to some extent, but not fully (thank god). also i literally cried while writing it today so there’s that. hope yall enjoy this one. i'm trying to post a bunch of fics since this coming week is my bday (the 14th). no guarantees, but i'm trying my best to put out at least six things. let me know what you think of this one. see yall later :)

prompt: colby has been ghosting you for a while, just when things were starting to get good between you two. after a week of ignoring you, he’s finally ready to talk. || fem!reader x colby brock

trigger warning: angst, cursing, heartache, crying, honestly this one is really sad so sorry about that, happy ending tho

word count: 2331

~~~~~~~

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I groaned to myself, staring at my phone.

Colby was still ignoring me, something I had grown accustomed to this week. He had ghosted my calls and my texts. He turned his read notifications off too, so I had no clue whether or not he had even seen my messages at all.

Everything had been going great between us. We had met a couple years back and hit it off as friends right away. I always thought he was attractive, and our friendship was always really flirty; so much so that fans thought we were together. And then finally, something clicked a couple months back. I wasn't sure if it was the accidental drunken kiss we shared, or just a built up of feelings, but we finally decided that maybe we should test out an actual relationship.

We promised each other we would take it slow, both of us still heartbroken from our previous relationships and our general trust issues. But these past two months, we went into overdrive, actually taking the time to feel each other out as boyfriend and girlfriend.

And for the first time, I felt happy. Genuinely happy.

A week ago, we had even gone on a cute little date, something we had started doing regularly. We were in the middle of our conversation; I remember I laughed hard at something he said. It was loud enough that some of the patrons in the restaurant stared at us. And when he tried to shush me jokingly, a silence had fallen over us.

His face dropped suddenly, he became super serious and quiet, and then he asked if we could go home.

He told me the next day that he thought he got food poisoning and it just hit him in the restaurant. I didn't think anything of it and was fine with going home early.

But now, I wonder if he was lying.

I looked back down at my phone, reading over my messages from the past week to him.

Was I taking this too far? He could have just been busy. I don't wanna come across as clingy.

"Ugh, fuck that." I muttered out loud to myself, rolling out of my bed to get a drink.

I didn't care if I came across as clingy. I had a right to know why he was ignoring me. If it was work related, he would have told me. He had done that in the past before.

This was different, I just knew it.

Tomorrow, I planned to go over and see him. I would have done it tonight, but I knew he wasn't home. He was out with some friends at Saddle Ranch. Like a fan, I had to watch his stories on Insta, since that was the only way I knew where he was.

"Don't expect too much from him." Sam said.

I shook my head at that memory. When we got together, everyone was happy for us. But I could feel a certain tension in the room, a certain caveat that wasn't being mentioned. Later that night, Sam and I were by ourselves, and he asked me if Colby and I had really made our relationship official. I told him we hadn't gone all the way, but that we were taking it one step at a time.

"I'm happy for you guys, really. I just wonder..." His voice trailed off.

I cocked my head. "Wonder what?"

"Look, I love you both, but I don't know if Colby is really ready for a relationship. There's a lot of things he still needs to work through." He stated.

"We're not that serious." I laughed.

"Yeah, yet. If you plan to be, I just don't want you to get your heart broken because he wasn't ready." Sam admitted.

I patted his shoulder lightly, smiling. "Relax, Samuel. Everything will be fine."

"Alright. Just... don't expect too much from him, okay?" He mentioned, his eyes narrowing on mine.

That had been two months ago and... I think I should have heeded his warning.

A loud knock at my front door brought me out of my thoughts, scaring me. I grabbed a knife from my kitchen, striding over to the door. I glance through the peephole to see who was there.

Colby's face stared back.

"Y/N, it's me. Can you open the door?" He called.

I scowled at him through the peephole. "Sorry she's not home right now. Maybe you should try responding to her texts.”

“Look I'm sorry, but that's why I came over. I wanted to talk in person.” He replied.

“Damn, that’s a shame. Too bad she’s not home!” I exclaimed angrily.

“C’mon now, don’t be childish.” He remarked.

I swung the door open, holding back from yelling into my hallway. “Childish?!”

He smirked at me. “I knew that would get you to open the door.”

“You’re not funny.” I deadpanned, glaring at him.

“Can you please let me in? I seriously want to talk.” Colby responded, his eyes landing on mine.

“No, Colby. It’s one o’clock in the morning, I don’t feel like talking, and you’re drunk.” I jeered, resting my hands on my hips.

He scrunched up his face dramatically. “No, I’m not. I only had like two drinks.”

“Oh my mistake. I figured a person that randomly comes over to talk at the ass-crack of night is usually drunk,” I quipped. “Don’t you have better things to do, like be at Saddle Ranch?”

He stepped back, raising an eyebrow. “How’d you know I was at Saddle Ranch?”

I could feel my cheeks heat up. “Because… I watched your stories.”

“Nice to know you pay attention to me,” he uttered under his breath. “Please let me in.”

“No. Fuck off, Colby.” I hissed.

He rolled his eyes at my comment. “If you don’t let me in, I’m just gonna make noise out here in the hallway until you do.”

“Bet.” I huffed.

“What was your favorite movie again… ‘10 Things I Hate About You’?” He questioned, stepping back further into the hallway.

I blinked. “Yeah, so what?”

He looked up at me, giving me a devilish smile. “…You’re just too good to be true.”

My face dropped at his voice. “Colby.”

“Can’t take my eyes off of you.” He sang, pointing at me.

“Are you really-” I started.

He cut me off, running his hands down his body. “You’d be like heaven to touch.”

I hushed. “Seriously stop-”

“I wanna hold you so much.” He closed his eyes, wrapping his arms around himself.

I grunted, smacking my hand towards him. “Colby, it’s one in the morn-”

“At long last, love has arrived.” He opened his arms wide.

“Shut the fuck up!” I whisper-shouted.

“And I thank God I'm alive.” Colby praised up towards the ceiling.

I retorted. “You’re fucking embarrass-”

He spun in a circle slowly. “You're just too good to be true.”

“I knew giving you the code to my apartment was a bad idea.” I grumbled.

“Can't take my eyes off of you.” He winked, pointing at me again.

Colby took a big inhale, ready to start singing the music, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him into my apartment.

I slammed my door shut, locking it quickly. “Next time you do something like that, I’m gonna kill you.”

“That’s not very- why do you have a knife?” He motioned toward the knife sitting on my side table.

“What-? Oh, I thought you were an intruder.” I explained.

He lightly smiled, his dimples appearing. “You think an intruder would knock?”

I snapped, annoyed. “Aren’t you here to apologize?”

“Right, right,” he cleared his throat, his demeanor changing. “Y/N, I’m deeply sorry.”

“Sure.” I narrowed my eyes, walking towards my kitchen.

He followed me. “I know what I did was fucked up. I should have responded to you.”

“You completely ignored me for over a week.” I informed him, resting my back against the counter.

He nodded. “I know. I shouldn’t have done that.”

I crossed my arms uncomfortably. “…were you busy?”

“No, not really.” He divulged, dropping his head.

“So, you purposefully ignored my calls and text…” I could feel my hands shake against my arms.

“You make it sound bad-” He mumbled.

“It is that bad.” I emphasized, stopping him. “Colby, you wanna talk about being childish? That shit was childish.”

He agreed. “I know it was.”

“Obviously not since you keep joking about it.” I argued.

“I’m not trying to joke,” he protested, running his hands through his hair. “Do you wanna know the honest to God truth?”

“Of course I do.” I answered, furrowing my eyebrows.

He exhaled, glancing at me. “When we first got together, even though we were taking it slow, I was terrified to date you.”

“Terrified?” I puzzled.

He swallowed hard. “Yes. Scared shitless.”

“Why?” I questioned.

“I thought it was because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. But then… at dinner,” his voice lowered, his shoulders dropping. “I realized it was more than that.”

I shook my head, confused. “What are you ta-”

“I’m falling in love with you, Y/N.” He confessed.

His words made me step back, my breath hitching in my throat.

I choked. “What?”

“When you laughed really hard, and did that cute snort thing you do, I remember we looked at each other… and all I saw was you,” his eyes bore into mine, causing goosebumps to rise all over my skin. “No one else in that restaurant existed. And in that moment, I wanted to tell you I love you.”

I stammered out words, unable to think clearly. “S-so… you-”

“When I felt it, I knew I had to go home. Because I was just so shocked at the feeling. I haven’t felt that way for anyone in a long time.” He sighed exhaustingly, “and… I apologize that I ignored you. Every time I saw your messages, I knew I should have responded. But my body, my mind, wouldn’t let me.”

I frowned. “Because you love me?”

“Because… I’m scared to love you.” He admitted.

A heavy silence fell over the apartment. I shuddered out an exhale, not even noticing I had been holding my breath in for so long. Colby closed his eyes, twisting up his face, and turned his back to me.

“Why are you scared to love me?” I gulped, scared of his answer.

His shoulders tensed as he gripped the counter. “The last time you felt heartbroken… did it leave you feeling empty? Because that’s how I felt… for so long. It’s not even the empty feeling that bothered me. It was the fact that I knew something used to be there… and now it’s gone. I miss who I was before.”

I opened my mouth, but no words escaped.

“I have this deep, guttural feeling that you’re gonna realize I’m not worth loving, and that there is someone else out there that is, and you’re gonna leave me.” His voice trembled as he spoke, “everyone… always leaves me.”

I gasped quietly. “Colby-”

He turned back to me, his face becoming red. “I just feel like no one ever needs me, you know? Like some people only keep me around because they don’t have the heart to just tell me they don’t care anymore. Even Sam has someone else.

I consoled. “That’s not-”

“And I know it’s selfish to want everyone around me to only want me. I don’t really feel that way. I just… don’t feel like anyone really needs me as much as I need them,” his chest quaked as his breathing began to speed up. “And when you realize it too… I don’t think I can live through that fall out again. I don’t think I’m gonna survive it.”

“Wait, Col-” I murmured.

“At that dinner, I had this gut-wrenching anxiety come over me; a voice in my head that said ‘she’s gonna leave you too’ and… I’m just so sorry.” He panted, his eyes welling up.

I wrapped my arms around him tightly, pressing his body into mine as hard as I could. He buried his face into my neck, his body almost going limp against mine.

I couldn’t help my own tears spill as they landed on his shirt. “Baby, why didn’t you tell me you were feeling this way before?”

“I was ashamed. I should be stronger than this.” He fumed through his tears.

I rubbed his face lovingly. “Who said that? You are strong. Expressing your emotions is strong.”

He nodded, croaking. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. Can you forgive me?”

“Of course. How about tonight you stay over, and then in the morning, we’ll talk about this more? Okay?” I suggested, resting my hands on his forearms.

“Yeah.” He whimpered.

I smiled brokenly. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

I lightly grasped Colby’s hand, pulling him slowly into my bedroom. He stumbled along, his head remaining down.

I sat him down on the bed and slid off his jacket, placing it on my dresser. I cupped his face, tracing his jaw with my fingers. His eyes finally landed on mine as I tilted his head up.

I leaned down and kissed his lips, resting my forehead against his.

“I’m not gonna leave you, Colby.” I stated, gazing into his eyes.

He begged in a hushed tone. “Please don’t.”

“I won’t. I promise.” I reassured, kissing his forehead.

I walked over to the other side of my bed and laid down. Colby kicked off his shoes, taking his belt off and pulling his jeans down. After getting undressed, he slid into bed with me, laying his head down softly on my chest. Wrapping his arms around me, he buried his head into my neck again, sighing against my skin. I ran my fingers through his hair, a light hum falling from his lips. I ran my other hand up and down his spine, feeling him shiver under my touch.

“We’ll be okay, Colby.” I whispered.

#colby brock #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fic #colby brock fanfiction #colby brock oneshot #colby brock x reader #colby brock one shot #colby brock angst

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phoenixyfriend · 4 years ago

Text

Anakin Introduces his Jedi Babies (and Himself)

Context: Anakin and the Jedi Babies, chrono

Warnings for: canon-typical dismemberment, unfortunately-aimed puppy crushes

Word count: 5,839

-------------------------

The first time a Jedi meets a Skywalker, it’s on Bandomeer.

The planet is close to Mandalorian space. Finding someone associated with Mandalore is, technically, not that surprising. There are even Mandalorian operations on the planet.

What is surprising is the fact that the person from Mandalorian space is an unfamiliar Jedi Knight who is utterly unstoppable.

(Obi-Wan Kenobi has no way of knowing how similar his experiences are to what might have been, on this planet. Mandalore has been interfering in operations here ever since Ylliben Skywalker started reporting visions about the coming catastrophe. Where that interference has helped or hurt... well. There’s no way to know.)

(Is there?)

When Xanatos shows up and starts taunting Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, there’s a giggle from the doorway.

All three have to turn to look at the individual in question.

Mid-twenties, leaning against the doorframe, slim but strong, covered in dark fabric and half a set of armor. A scar by one eye, well-kept hair, and a smirk that could burn the longest fuse. A lightsaber, unlit, in one gloved hand.

This man is... very attractive, Obi-Wan thinks. This is not an appropriate thought for the situation. Obi-Wan thinks he can maybe blame it on the exhaustion.

“No, no, keep going,” the stranger says, sounding like there’s a laugh stuck in his throat. He waves dismissively. “Let’s, ah, let’s hear the master plan. Good ranting voice, maybe a six out of ten on the ‘I’m better than you’ and a four on the actual intimidation. You can do better.”

“Excuse me?” Xanatos hisses, sounding incredibly malicious to Obi-Wan’s ears. “Just who do you think you are?”

“And now you’re overselling it,” the stranger sighs. “Are you new at this? You seem new at this.”

“I would... also like to know who you are,” Master Jinn admits, shifting uncertainly as he tries to keep both du Crion and the stranger in his sights.

“I’m just your friendly neighborhood Jedi Knight, here to fight darksiders because... that’s my life, apparently,” the man says, looking down at his arm for some reason. He shakes his head and looks up at them with a bright grin. “Do you need some help, Master Jinn?”

“You still haven’t told us your name.”

“This is true,” the knight says. “That said, I’ve been told by my boss to explicitly avoid naming myself while on this mission for a variety of reasons.”

“Your... boss,” du Crion drawls. “Not the Council, then.”

“Current supervisor,” the stranger offers as correction, completely unconcerned. “It’s a complicated situation, don’t worry about it.”

“I don’t worry about nonentities.”

The man purses his lips like he’s trying very, very hard not to laugh again. It’s very mocking. “Sure, kid.”

Xanatos has had his lightsaber out ever since Obi-Wan and Master Jinn entered the room, but he does one of those fancy, meant-to-be-intimidating one-handed saber twirls as he turns to face the Knight.

The man’s smirk widens. “You do realize you’re going to lose, right? C’mon, kid--”

“I’m older than you!”

“I did like zero research on you as a person, just your many and varied crimes; how old are you?”

Du Crion’s face goes pinched. “I’m twenty-five.”

“Ah, yeah, no, I’m older,” the knight says. “Only a few years, but I’m also a delightfully obnoxious little bastard who ages real slow for, uh, reasons--”

Obi-Wan is fascinated. This man is very strange. And very pretty.

Obi-Wan may be light-headed. Is he bleeding? Blood loss would explain this.

Obi-Wan isn’t bleeding. Damn.

“--anyway, I’m sure I’ve got a more interesting life with more mature experiences than you,” the knight says. “So even if I wasn’t older in body, I’d be older in spirit.”

The knight’s entire sense of being carries such an air of banthashit that Obi-Wan can barely believe it. It’s almost impressive. Obi-Wan wonders how often this man just opens his mouth and immediately gets punched in the face.

“You talk a lot for a man in someone else’s domain.”

“Hey, look on the bright side,” the knight says. “At least I’m not flirting with you. That’s what my master did with almost every darksider we met except his grandmaster.”

Du Crion pauses.

Obi-Wan has the distinct feeling that he and Master Jinn have lost any control they might have, at any point, had over this situation. They hadn’t had much control in the first place, but anything they did have is squarely in the stranger’s court right now. The silver lining to that is that du Crion is thoroughly distracted and has also lost some control of the situation.

“Besides,” the man continues, completely ignoring the very red lightsaber that is being very obviously readied for his death. “This is not that big of an advantage for you. I mean, hey, the fancy central console that can only be reached by skinny walkways with no railings are a nice touch, all chromed metal and minimal lighting, very dramatic, but there’s no lava. I’m not, like, chained to a rock in the middle of an arena for a public execution at the hands of starving animals the size of a fighter ship. You’re threatening to kill me personally instead of standing in the most expensive box of the theater, sipping your wine and congratulating yourself on step one of a plan that has another fifty-thousand steps and no end in sight. You--”

“Is there a point to this?”

“I’m just saying, I’ve been in worse situations by better darksiders than you. This is sad. You’re sad. Try harder.”

Obi-Wan makes a little noise in the back of his throat. Nobody seems to notice, but Master Jinn does put a hand on his shoulder. That’s nice.

“I don’t have any interest in setting up a public execution.”

“What kind of a Sith wannabe are you?” the knight asks, tilting his head. Obi-Wan distantly notes that his hair is longer than initially assumed; it’s just held back and curled. “Public executions are a whole thing. It’s like you’re not even trying. Tell me you’ve at least got vague plans to hand me off to a pirates instead of killing me so you can make some comment about me not even being worth the effort.”

“Are you trying to get yourself killed?” du Crion asks, his voice the kind of forced casual level nonsense that shows he’s actually very, very frustrated. Obi-Wan could almost believe that du Crion is as uninterested as he’s pretending to be.

“If I was trying to get myself killed, I’d... pick a fight with the Trade Federation, maybe? I mean, I survived that when I was nine but they’d probably take me more seriously this time.” The knight taps at his chin. “I don’t even know where the actual Sith is, but--”

“There are no more Sith,” du Crion scoffs.

Oh, the knight looks pitying now. Obi-Wan likes that much more than he should. It just really suits the man’s face.

Quin’s going to make so much fun of him later.

“I have fought multiple Sith,” the man says, slowly and clearly, as though explaining something to a child. “My master fought more than that. I lost my arm to a Sith when I was nineteen. You can say they’re gone, but I don’t trust like that.”

“It’s not a matter of trust,” du Crion says, rolling his eyes. “It has been a thousand years since the Sith were wiped out. Much as I’d like them to still be around, I’m not going to--”

“Oh!” the knight exclaims. “You’re lying! You do think they’re back, this whole mess is you auditioning.”

Du Crion stares at the man as though he’s lost what few marbles he had. “Excuse me?”

“You want to be the next Sith Apprentice,” the man says, cheerfully unconcerned by the mounting tension in the air. “That’s adorable. Well, no, actually, it’s very bad, both for you and for everyone else, and now it means I can’t just kill you in battle like I was planning because the Jedi are going to need you for information. Blast.”

Du Crion’s eyes widen. It is not in fear, but in incredulity. Obi-Wan thinks that it’s all in the eyebrows and the tight, befuddled smile. “You were planning to kill me, Jedi?”

“I mean... yeah, kinda,” the knight says, shrugging. “Quick and clean option, that.”

This time, Master Jinn is the one that makes a disbelieving noise that both of the bitchy twenty-somethings ignore.

“You’re a Jedi,” du Crion points out, entirely pleasant.

“...yes,” the man says, not meeting anyone’s eyes. “Technically.”

Du Crion is very much distracted by this. “Technically?”

The man wiggles a hand. “Arguments can be made. I certainly was trained as a Jedi and consider myself to be one. My knighting was according to protocol, and at the Temple. Technically.”

“...but?” Master Jinn prompts.

The knight smiles like he’s got something very spicy in his mouth and is unwilling to admit it’s too much for him. “But nothing! Don’t worry about it. There’s a fight to be had with a Sith wannabe who doesn’t realize he’s not going to measure up.”

“Arrogant,” du Crion accuses.

“No,” the knight immediately says. “You just don’t fight a galactic war without learning which opponents are actually going to kill you.”

Obi-Wan leans into Master Jinn’s side, his legs feeling a little too much like jelly. He whispers, “I have so many questions.”

“As do I, Padawan,” Master Jinn mutters back, and something in Obi-Wan’s heart twists. He’s a padawan! Master Jinn’s actually going to go through with it!

The fight does actually happen, at that point. The knight lights his saber and leaps forward, flashing through Djem So movements without a moment’s hesitation. For all the trash talk and boasting, the fight isn’t actually over very quickly. Du Crion is good, even without having had a chance to spar against a real person since he left the Order. Power flows around him, dark and heavy and sharp in ways that the Force usually isn’t, and the red saber snaps through the air with a speed Obi-Wan can barely track. Xanatos du Crion is, without question, danger incarnate in this moment.

The unknown knight is better.

There are attempts at banter, mostly by the stranger. Du Crion is too focused on the fight to bother responding. Obi-Wan just clings to Master Jinn, trying to stay awake and aware. It’s difficult, given the past few days, and even with help from the Force, he’s flagging.

The way the knight moves is... captivating, though.

(Quinlan’s going to laugh at the top of his lungs, later. Obi-Wan’s going to blush and stutter and bury his face in a pillow, and Bant’s going to pat his back like the amazing friend she is, and Quin’s just going to laugh, like an asshole.)

The fight doesn’t end cleanly. The knight cuts du Crion’s saber in half and, in the same movement, cuts the man’s hand off.

Obi-Wan’s seen too much blood in the last few days for it to shock him, but the smell is... unpleasant.

“I don’t suppose either of you carries Force-nullifying cuffs?” the knight asks, holding his saber to du Crion’s neck with an expression that is amused and satisfied in equal measure.

“No,” Master Jinn says. He seems... very bothered. Well, du Crion was his student once. Obi-Wan can’t imagine he’d be very calm if he had a student that went dark and started killing children. “Was cutting off his hand really necessary?”

“I feel like half my fights end with either someone dying or someone losing a limb,” the knight muses. “Sometimes that limb is my own, even!”

Obi-Wan isn’t sure if the man is manic or just trying to throw them off their rhythm. It probably doesn’t matter.

“Okay, I have Force-nullifying cuffs of my own,” the man says. “But these things are expensive as hell, and they weren’t paid for by the Order, so just giving them to you isn’t really on the table. That said... my ship kind of got shot down on the way here. If you could give me a ride off-planet--”

“Our ship was also shot down.”

The knight blinks at him, and then kicks du Crion in the hamstring. It’s not a very hard kick, but du Crion shoots him a look of offense that’s probably justified. Getting kicked when one is already down is never a great feeling.

“Stop shooting people,” the knight scolds.

Obi-Wan feels vaguely like he’s having a fever dream.

“Okay, new plan,” the man says. “What kind of ship did you come in?”

“KYL-3400 small transport,” Master Jinn says, with not a little hesitation. “Why?”

The knight grins. “I’m going to cannibalize it for parts.”

-------------------------

Jango has known Anakin Skywalker for six years. Many of those years have been spent being yanked into babysitting for the man. For reasons Jango doesn’t feel like examining, this will likely continue.

“You’re late,” he says, as the man in question stumbles out of a battered ship that looks only barely like the one that left three months ago. “I thought you said Bandomeer was a quick fix.”

“Ship got shot down, had to help some Jedi, ran into fucking Onaka on the way back,” Skywalker grouses. “I feel like shit. Where are my kids?”

“Buir says you have to go to medical.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever. My kids, Jango.”

“They can visit you in medical.”

“And, what, Mereel’s gonna go there for a debrief?”

“Your debrief is going through me,” Jango says, and doesn’t let himself flinch when Skywalker makes a face. “He’ll check in later.”

“Yeah, no,” Skywalker says, taking a step forward and then swaying with a curse. “Listen, this actually does need to go to Mand’alor direct, not just the Alor-in-training--”

“Please don’t do that with my language,” Jango immediately says. “That’s not--no. ‘Alor-in-training’ isn’t a thing. Don’t do that.”

Skywalker turns on his heel with a frustrated snarl, and Jango’s eyes widen as the stupid tunics the man wears flare out.

“Is that a blaster wound?”

“No.”

“Yes it--for fuck’s sake, Skywalker!” Jango growls and just goes over to grab the taller man by the shoulders and march him to medical. “I’m calling your sister.”

“Don’t tell Shmi, she’s got enough to--”

“I’m calling your sister,” Jango snaps. “And you’re going to deal with it. Ka’ra, do you even think? Is there a brain in that head of yours?”

“I’ve been told my braincell is lonely.”

“I’m going to shove you in a trash compactor, dikut’la jetii,” Jango mutters. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”

“If I say yes, will you let me go deal with it on my own?”

Jango strangles his own scream and shoves Skywalker into the nearest examination room. “Fix him!”

The medic looks up, raises a brow, and turns to Skywalker. “What did you do?”

“What didn’t I do?” Skywalker shoots back, grinning like they’re sharing battle stories over a drink in a cantina.

The medic--Mirka’lu, he thinks--crosses her arms. “General.”

Oh man, the medics must be angry with him already if they’re already jumping titles like that.

“I’m just a knight--”

“General Skywalker.”

The man in question grimaces. “I maybe got shot during an altercation with some pirates.”

“Uh-huh.”

“And... I maybe--maybe--picked a fight with some Hutt enforcers.”

Jango’s going to wring his neck.

Right after he calls Shmi.

-------------------------

Komari does her level best to not shift nervously under the judgmental eyes of the man they’re pretty sure is the Mand’alor. Her master’s got the situation under control. She’s just there to observe. They’ve got an entire team--

“Is that your way of telling me that your Order did minimal research on the situation before coming to intervene, and the only reason you bothered to reach out is because one of my men, weeks ago, let you know that Death Watch is setting traps for both my people and yours?”

Komari feels the flare of annoyance from Master Dooku. She doesn’t react, but she can hear the tension when her Master speaks.

“I assure we would not have attacked on Galidraan unless attacked first, or if we’d found solid evidence of the actions we were informed of,” Master Dooku says, quiet and even. “All your messenger did was save us all a little time.”

Mereel smiles thinly. “Saved us all some lives, more like it.”

“Perhaps.”

“Ah, jetiise aren’t the only ones with Force-Sensitives,” the Mand’alor says. “I’ve more than a few under my command. Visions aren’t foolproof, I’m aware, but I’ll be damned if such a warning goes completely ignored.”

Master Dooku makes a low humming noise. “Be that as it may, I’m unsure of what it is that you’re expecting out of our... presence. We are not here to help you claim your presumed throne. We are only here to stop the killings we were told about.”

“I don’t need your help to reunite my people.” Mereel waves a hand, batting the mere suggestion away. “But I’d appreciate the help with taking out the terrorist group that’s actually going out and murdering the helpless, this planet’s farmers and doctors and children. Kyr’tsad isn’t just a thorn in my side, Master Jedi.”

“And what proof do I have that you aren’t just the same kind of monster as you claim they are?” Master Dooku challenges.

It’s a little brazen, considering how dicey these negotiations are. For all that Komari herself doesn’t wince, someone behind her outright hisses in dismay. She agrees with the sentiment.

Mereel just laughs at them. He catches the eye of one of the armored individuals along the wall, human or close to it, and nods to himself.

“Right,” the man says. “Well, we have our own Jedi. Would you like to meet him?”

Master Dooku is immobile, as if carved from stone. The rest of the group is... not.

“I suppose that would be acceptable,” Master Dooku says, and Komari feels the tension in him wind further through the training bond. There are a million questions to be had here. None of them can be answered without the supposed Jedi.

“Great,” the Mand’alor says. He leans back in his seat and turns to the door. With the press of a button, the door slides open. “Ben!”

A child darts into the room, stops, and bounces on their feet. Probably male, Komari thinks, and very anxious. The child’s eyes dart about the room, taking in every single Jedi in sight. When that gaze lands on Master Dooku, there’s a flash of recognition and... not hate, but distaste. Confused and distant dismay, maybe. The child turns back to Mereel.

“Mand’alor,” the child greets, still bouncing. “Am I needed?”

“Thought I told you this meeting was for grown-ups,” the Mand’alor says.

Ben shrugs. “I wanted to listen in.”

“That door is soundproofed and you know it.”

“So?”

The Mand’alor grins. “Do me a favor and go fetch your dad.”

“Buir’s still sleeping,” Ben says, grave as dirt. It’s a strange expression for such a small child. He can’t be older than eight, and Komari’s pretty sure even that’s a stretch. “Shmi’s gonna be mad if he has to wake up before the bacta’s done.”

“I just need him for negotiations,” Mereel assures the child.

“Aggressive negotiations with a lightsaber?” Ben asks, and Komari nearly chokes.

“No, just regular ones.”

Ben nods sharply, and then turns and runs out.

“That boy...” Mereel mutters, but it’s fond. “Anywa--”

“BUIR!” Ben’s voice echoes from the hall, faint but audible, along with some very loud banging on what is presumably a door. “DAD! WAKE UP, THE COUNT IS HERE!”

The Count? Komari wonders. Even Master Dooku seems surprised.

The question is clearly on more minds than just her own. Mereel raises a brow at Master Dooku and gestures vaguely. “Didn’t know any of you were nobility. You a Count, Master Jedi?”

“No,” Master Dooku says, and before the Mand’alor can press further, he adds, “but if I were to retire from the Order, the title would be mine to inherit. As I have no intentions of retiring, I am not and will not be a Count, but I assume that is what the child is referring to.”

“Ben,” the Mand’alor corrects. He seems pleased with the reasonable answer. “Ylliben Skywalker. I suggest you refer to him by name.”

“You have a fondness for him,” Master Dooku notes.

Mereel shrugs. “No more than any other child, objectively, but his father is one of my more effective allies, and he gets antsy about things. Saying ‘your child’ won’t be a problem, but ‘the child’ is... well.”

The smirk is a challenge that Komari doesn’t feel ready to meet. She’s glad it’s not hers to handle.

“Why do you ‘have’ a Jedi?” Master Dooku asks, pushing the conversation back to the point Komari’s sure he was initially aiming for.

“Found him in a snowstorm, brought him inside,” Mereel says, grinning. “And then he refused to leave, the shabuir. Troublesome man, like you wouldn’t believe, but useful.”

“Like a feral tooka,” someone behind Komari mutters. She feels a part of her soul die.

You can’t just say that in front of the Mand’alor! she screeches in the depths of her mind, despairing.

“Exactly,” Mereel agrees with a laugh. “Skywalker’s a feral tooka.”

Komari dies a little more.

“Talkin’ shit about me, Mereel?”

...oh no.

This one’s pretty.

The man is tall, dressed almost entirely in black, and looks like shit.

“You look like you got run over by a herd of bantha,” the Mand’alor notes.

“I got back less than a day ago,” Skywalker growls out. He leans against the wall behind the Mand’alor’s desk. He folds his arms. He glowers around the room. “The kriff is Count Dooku doing here?”

“Master Dooku,” the man in question says, a little pained. “As I informed Mand’alor Mereel, I may technically have claim to that title, but I am a Jedi. So long as I remain a Jedi, the title isn’t actually mine.”

Skywalker makes a face, and then shakes his head. “Fine. Whatever. Jaster, what the hell do you need from me?”

“Well, some manners would be nice.”

“I got shot and am putting myself in a position to get yelled at by baar’ur Mirka’lu for coming here when I’m supposed to be on bed rest,” Skywalker growls out. He kicks Mereel’s chair, glaring at the back of the man’s head. “You’re lucky I put on pants.”

Mereel seems unbothered by this statement or treatment.

Komari thinks her eyes may currently be the size of dinner plates.

“You’re the one from Bandomeer.”

Skywalker’s head snaps up to focus his gaze on Master Dooku. “Say what?”

“You’re the one my former Padawan encountered on Bandomeer,” Master Dooku says, something satisfied in his tone. “He said you refused to give a name, but the physical description does match.”

“Oh, lovely, Jinn’s been gossiping,” Skywalker mutters. “That’s just--”

“General Skywalker,” Mereel says, voice finally slipping to something more stern than amused. “If you could please focus.”

Skywalker rolls his eyes and mutters something about painkillers.

“Buir?”

Skywalker’s head tilts to the side, and he holds one arm out to the side. The kid from before--Ben--darts in to cling to the man’s side. A slightly taller Togruta follows in and ducks in under his other arm. Both children keep a wary gaze fixed on the same person, and their adult...

Every look from this man is a new challenge to Master Dooku.

“They’re yours?”

That is the exact question Komari was hoping her master wouldn’t ask.

“We’re in Mandalorian territory,” Skywalker says. “They’re Force-Sensitive orphans with an incredible amount of potential. If I didn’t claim them, someone else would have.”

It’s not an airtight justification--the man could have just sent them to the Temple--but the air around him is roiling with aggression. This man does not like Master Dooku, and is more than a shade protective of these--his--children. Komari shifts her weight and worries as the pregnant silence grows heavier.

“As you say,” Master Dooku allows, and some of the bowstring-tight tension in the room loosens, drains away like foul bathwater. “If I may... I was unaware you were a General, nor that Mandalore had a standing army large enough for such a position.”

“He’s not,” Mereel says. “Used to be, won’t tell me where. It’s not my business, or yours. Title’s a holdover from whatever war he was fighting before we got him.”

Komari is not the only person whose heart drops as Master Dooku says, “Qui-Gon claimed that the rogue knight he’d met on Bandomeer mentioned a galactic war against the Sith.”

Mereel blinks, and then turns his seat around to look at Skywalker. The other Mandalorians look at Skywalker. Every single Jedi also looks at Skywalker.

The Togruta child sticks her tongue out at Master Dooku.

“I did say that,” Skywalker says. “What of it?”

“You know, when I said I didn’t care what fight you were running that turned you into a soldier, I kind of assumed it was something on the level of, say, a system-wide civil war,” Mereel drawls. “Not galactic Force nonsense.”

Skywalker shrugs. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to.”

“Because you’ll lie?”

“No, I’m just going to be really annoying about it,” Skywalker tells him. The Togruta giggles and shoves her face into his side. “Or, hell, I’ll let Ben do it. We both know he can talk circles around basically everyone in this room.”

“Skywalker.”

“Mereel.”

The two hold gazes for a moment that lasts just a little too long, and then Mereel breaks it off. “We’re talking about this later.”

“Of course, Mand’alor,” Skywalker says, with a grim sort of smile. “Wouldn’t dream of doing otherwise.”

Mereel doesn’t seem particularly impressed by that.

Komari wonders if anyone else remembers that Skywalker was supposed to be here to make negotiations easier.

-------------------------

Yan Dooku is having a Day.

He’s not entirely sure whom to blame for this mess. Perhaps Yoda, for suggesting he handle this mission. Perhaps the governor of Galidraan, who decided collaborating with terrorists for his own gain was a good idea. Perhaps Jaster Mereel, whose influence and power is enough that Yan needs to tread carefully. Perhaps Qui-Gon, for giving him just enough information about Skywalker to cause some drama.

Perhaps Skywalker for being a recalcitrant, ornery bastard who delights in Yan’s suffering.

(One of the Mandalorians calls him that to his face, and Skywalker informs the man that “my mother always told me I didn’t have a father,” and stares until the Mando stammers out an apology and turns on his heel.)

(The smirk on Skywalker’s face is certainly informative.)

“Hi.”

Yan looks up from the datapad he’s been using to try and punch out a report, for all that he can’t find the words he needs, and sees the Togruta youngling from Skywalker’s side hanging upside-down from a ventilation grate.

He blinks evenly at her. “Good afternoon. Is that your normal manner of traversing the building?”

“Yeah, when Jan-Jan isn’t yelling at me about it,” she says, and drops from the ceiling. Seemingly without paying attention, she directs the grate itself back into place with the Force, screws reattaching themselves with only the slightest whisper. She’s done this many, many times.

“I’m afraid I don’t know who that is.”

“Jango Fett,” she clarifies. “Ad be Mand’alor.”

Child of the king.

He does remember that much from the briefing.

“I see,” Yan says, rather than try to tackle whatever the usage of such a nickname implies. “I’m afraid nobody’s seen fit to introduce you, youngling.”

“I’m Sokanth Skywalker, but most people call me Soka,” she says, with a bouncing, shallow bow. Full of energy, this one. “I’m eight.”

“The General is your father, then?”

“Mm-hm! He adopted me when I was almost two,” she says, and climbs up onto the bench. She wraps her arms around her knees and beams up. “Ben was still a baby, and we didn’t go get Shmi until a few months later when Skyguy could afford it.”

“Skyguy?” Yan prompts.

“My dad,” she explains, head tilting a little as she studies his reaction. “I... I’ve always called him Skyguy. He took care of me before he adopted me, for at least a year. He says I called him Skyguy when I first started talking, back then, and then he didn’t make me stop when he adopted me.”

“I see,” Yan says. “Does your father know you’re speaking with me?”

“Probably.”

“And would he approve?” Yan hints as heavily as he can. “He doesn’t seem to like me very much.”

“That’s because we’ve all seen what you could be,” she says. “But you’re not the Count yet, so it’s okay.”

Information. “Ah. Visions, then. That would explain some things.”

“Ben gets them the most,” she keeps talking. “But it’s not just that. It’s like... patterns. The Sith are going to target you, because they’re going to think you’re worth corrupting.”

“And you’ve seen enough Sith to know that?”

“Yeah.”

“Visions are not foolproof,” he says, trying to keep his tone gentle. He’s not used to interacting with children of this age, and this one comes with a father in the Mand’alor’s confidence, someone he can’t afford to irritate by making a daughter cry. “I have a friend who is very prone to visions, and some come true, some don’t, and others--”

“Are self-fulfilling,” Sokanth finishes for him. “I know that. But my dad’s actually fought Sith, y’know. The guy who cut off my dad’s arm used to be a Jedi Master, like you, and he was all fancy-schmancy and a history nerd for Sith stuff, and didn’t like the Council or their decisions very much. Like you.”

That’s... very personal.

“A surface-level similarity is not enough to make the claim that I am to become a Sith,” he says.

She blinks at him, eyes too large for a face that’s so near to human in bone-structure. It’s unnerving. “Whether or not you Fall is your choice, Count. All I can tell you is that you are the kind of person they look to groom... if only as a pawn.”

The words are too old for a girl her size.

“You speak as if you’ve faced the Sith yourself,” Yan says, well aware now that he needs to tread carefully, but... “You’re too young to go out into the field. I can’t imagine your father would allow a child like yourself to go up against someone that dangerous.”

She blinks those too large eyes, and tilts her head in the other direction, and then smiles. “You care. That’s good. Keep that compassion, Count.”

He raises an eyebrow. “I feel like you’re evading the question.”

Sokanth giggles. “Maybe. Buir doesn’t like us talking about it much. It makes him sad, ‘cuz he can’t help us not hurt, and a lot of it is really scary. It’s like... my memories are too big for my head. I don’t get a lot of visions, but I get a lot of dreams of things that happened that I’m not alive for. And buir does remember those things happening, so it’s true, and it happened, but I only... sort of remember it, and when I think about it too hard, it hurts my head. Or I get nightmares about it, and I don’t like those. Ben’s got it worse, though. He has more to fight.”

It’s a lot of information.

It’s confusing information.

It’s... possibly information that the General has asked her to feed him for reasons he can’t even begin to guess at.

“In this war your father fought,” Yan asks, “were you a soldier as well?”

“Commander,” she corrects, voice soft. “That’s what the dreams call me, before they start screaming.”

“How old are you really?” He asks, before he can quite stop himself.

She laughs, suddenly bright again. “I’m as old as I look. I’m eight. Just because the Force gives me memories I shouldn’t have doesn’t mean that my brain isn’t a kid. Sometimes Ben tries to act older than he is ‘cuz of the memories, y’know. Buir gets sad whenever he does that, ‘cuz he thinks we deserve to be kids before the galaxy goes to hell again.”

“He’s sure of such a thing?”

“It always does,” she says, with the air of someone who isn’t sure how their conversation partner could be quite that dense. Her voice takes on a sing-song cadence, like she’s telling a fable instead of a philosophy. “War always comes eventually. Not every sentient is selfish, but enough are, and they tend to be the ones that claw their way to the top. The rich and powerful will take and take and take, and then, when there’s nothing left, they will use their living stepping stones to tear each other apart. All we can do is be ready to end it as quickly as possible once it comes.”

Yan lets the claim sit for a long, quiet minute. “Did your father tell you that?”

“No,” she says. “Ben did.”

The six-year-old.

“He has a way with words,” Yan manages.

“Sometimes he uses his stuffed animals to host courtroom dramas,” she says. “He makes me look up the right laws so it can be procedurally accurate, ‘cuz he’s a nerd but so am I, and it makes Skyguy happy when he sees us playing like that instead of just doing saber forms and stuff.”

Yan has... no idea what to do with that. “I wouldn’t normally call courtroom dramas a normal children’s activity.”

“Yeah, but Ben’s a nerd,” she says, as if that’s all that needs to be said. Maybe, for her, it is. “And there’s only so much time I’m allowed to spend hunting.”

Right. Togruta.

“And what was your father doing at that age?”

“I’m not allowed to talk about that,” she says immediately. “Because it’s very private and he and Shmi get upset if we bring it up, ‘cuz of trauma and stuff.”

Shmi. The... sister, he thinks. People seem to be unclear on that. He’s heard a few refer to the teenager as just “one of Skywalker’s,” so that’s something to consider. She’s near-perfectly halfway between the children and the General, in terms of age, so it’s a little ambiguous where she fits.

That said, he’s been in a lot of places in his time as a Jedi Master. It’s taken him a little longer than it should have to realize, but he thinks he’s got at least part of the puzzle.

Skywalker’s a slave name. Tatooine, specifically.

It’s not confirmation, really, but...

Well. He thinks it’s better he doesn’t dig, on that subject.

“Hey,” Sokanth says, tugging at his sleeve. “Can I ask ya something?”

“I cannot promise an answer, but you may ask.”

“Can you spar with Skyguy? I wanna see who wins.”

#Disaster Lineage #Anakin Skywalker #Ahsoka Tano #Obi Wan Kenobi #Qui Gon Jinn #Count Dooku #Yan Dooku #Ben Kenobi #Jaster Mereel #Xanatos du Crion #Jango Fett #Komari Vosa #time travel #de aging #age shifting #family #phoenix files #Anakin and the Jedi Babies #500 notes

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buckybarnesdiaries · 4 years ago

Text

i won't let you down

bucky barnes x reader. ⎢ masterlist.

Bucky helps you and gives you hope.

word count: 1.196 words.

warnings/tags: very brief mention of domestic violence, the winter soldier coming to help you.

author notes: none of my stories contain reader’s body descriptions to be inclusive.

Join the tag list here.

BUCKY POV

It was the fourth month he was living in the same building as you, concretely, in the apartment next to yours. Since the very first moment you met in the lift, you were extra kind with him and he couldn’t help but think that you were hiding some kind of intentions, until the days passed away and he discovered it was part of your naturality. He remembered, as if it happened yesterday, the first morning he knocked on your door asking for some coffee and you practically invited him to have breakfast together. You two talked about your part-time job in a cafeteria by morning, close to the neighborhood, and another one in a book shop by evenings. Bucky was fascinated by how much you used the hours of your days, letting you work out and have long walks in Central Park.

And he also remembered the night you knocked on his door for the first time, after hearing him having some nightmares and not being able to go back to sleep. The walls seemed like thin paper. He didn’t get it out of his head that time he heard you crying in your room, in the small hours, after a fight with your boyfriend. A punk who didn’t deserve an angel like you. On all the occasions you two argued, Bucky wanted to intervene, but he didn’t because what was his right.

Until a night where the heated talk escalated too quickly to swearings coming from him, and a painful scream coming from your lips after a loud hit. Bucky kicked the door down without doubting, panting furious and breaking into your apartment like a bat out of hell. As soon as he reached the living room and saw you crying and lying on the floor, all his rage contained during months got concentrated on the same point. Five cold fingers closing in a big and dangerous fist.

“Who the fuck are you?” Your boyfriend spat raving mad.

“A guy who’s gonna disappoint his therapist for breaking rule number two”. The soldier hissed, not giving time to the other to react.

With his left hand grabbing your boyfriend’s throat, Bucky pinned him to the nearest wall with so much uncontrollable strength that he almost opened a hold in it, straight to his own house.

“Listen to me now, you son of a bitch”. Their faces were separated barely for a couple of inches, drinking each other’s breathing. “If I see you coming again, laying a finger on her… I promise I’ll turn your life into a damn nightmare”.

Bucky could see the horror borning in his eyes when your boyfriend recognized him. That voice. Those blue orbs. The metallic fingers cutting off the air from his lungs. He was in the news for a long time. The Winter Soldier. One of those freaks with superpowers, with the difference that he was a trained assassin. Only a fool wouldn’t obey his threat. But for some reason, Bucky wasn’t able to loosen the hold around the other man, driven by the desire he had for killing him. After all the suffering he made you go through, after all the nights hearing you crying, after all the time waiting for your boyfriend to change. He wanted to end his life.

“Bu— Bucky”. Your weak sobs brought him back to reality. To New York. To the year twenty twenty-one. To the new century.

As if it was an automatic act, his fingers opened making your boyfriend fall to the floor. Coughing, choking with his own saliva and the lack of air. The poor coward ran away before Bucky could blink twice. Shaking his head to shut up the voices inside his head claiming him to chase the man, he turned around and squatted next to you. A thin thread of blood poured out from the upper right corner of your lip, as your cheek was burning in pain after the punch. The soldier held you onto his arms, listening to the sound of the police sirens coming. Probably some neighbor called them, fed up with the fights inside your house.

You were crying inconsolably and ashamed when he walked into his apartment, placing you with so much care on his sofa. Bucky didn’t utter a syllable, heading to his bathroom to take something to fix you up. He had a good medical kit since he didn’t want to visit any kind of hospital. Coming back to you, the soldier knelt next to you, feeling a knot inside his chest pressing out his skin. He wetted a cotton in hydrogen peroxide and placed his warm free hand on your untouched cheek to urge you to raise your head towards him. You couldn’t help but draw a grimace of pure soreness that broke his heart in one million pieces.

“Sorry…” Bucky murmured, earning your look filled up with sadness. “I, uh… I wanted to… So many times, I…”

“Thank you… for saving me”. You stuttered in low tears, while he continued healing your lip and cleaning the blood on it. “You’re a… good man, James”.

“I just did what I had to”.

“We’re… more than fifty persons living here… And you’ve been the one who has saved me”.

Knocks on his door interrupted your little chat, causing him to frown as the two of you heard it was the NYPD. Bucky left a delicate caress on your cheek before standing up and attending the call. The cops came into his house without asking if they could, knowing very well the man who was living there.

“Ma’am, you okay?” One of the officers inquired walking closer.

“Yeah, it was… I just… slip off to the fl—”. Tell them about your, now, ex-boyfriend wasn’t an option for you, feigning a soft chuckle as you cleaned the tears in your eyelids.

“His boyfriend hit her”. But Bucky interrupted you.

“And you helped her, mister Barnes?”

“Yeah, and she’s gonna make a complaint”.

That wasn’t an option for you either, but by the look coming from his eyes, you knew it was the only one for him. You couldn’t persuade him.

“Ma’am?”

Bucky licked his bottom lip, shortening the distance between both to grab his cozy and baggy black hoodie to offer it to you. He was determined to help you. He really wanted your welfare.

“C’mon”. He almost begged you in a whisper, shaking briefly his hand holding the piece of clothing to convince you of taking the good road. “I’ll be with you, I promise. I won’t let you down… Not again”.

It took you a couple of seconds to nod your head, getting up from his sofa being helped by the cold hand showing up. Bucky made you wear his hoodie, with so much careless to not touch your right cheek still burning because of the pain. Under the attentive look of the cops, he placed his flesh arm over your shoulders, not caring about the lack of distance when you clung yours around his waist and tried to hide your face on his chest. For the first time since you started that toxic relationship, you felt safe. You felt liberated.

feedback is appreciated, please, leave a comment to let me know if you liked it.

and REBLOG!!! support the writers 🤍

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#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #sebastian stan x you #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #the winter soldier x reader

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versadies · 4 years ago

Note

helloooo Can I request a poly headcanons for Xiao and Zhongli? Thank you so much!!!

penpal: omg that’s a unique dynamic, i love it. hope you enjoy this headcanon! (sorry if it’s short 😔🙏)

sypnosis: what it’s like to be in a poly relationship with zhongli and xiao

warning/s: angst if you squint, not proof-read, spoilers on archon quest

holy crap girl you got a damn jackpot.

you probably have the biggest patience because it will take a long time for xiao and zhongli to even realize their feelings.

listen, these two will treat you so well and make sure you’re happy. your relationship is the kind of relationship that everyone wants but can’t have.

i can’t really see xiao and zhongli rivaling but they try to work out on how they’ll make this relationship work (with your help ofc)

the relationship needs to be kept a secret since xiao is a yaksha and zhongli is rex lapis, so the three of you can’t hang out together in the harbor or anywhere that has a lot of people around.

sometimes xiao would sneak in to liyue harbor and to your home just to see you— but your meeting place is always the inn.

verr goldet is one of the people who are aware of your relationship and she makes sure no one can bother y’all or see you together.

the three of you would take a stroll around the area of wangshu inn at night (after xiao and zhongli made sure that there won’t be any monsters to disturb yall’s night) and enjoy the peaceful atmosphere.

dates with them are very fun and open.

if you and zhongli are available for the whole day, the three of you would go to the adeptus mountains and have a picnic there to watch the beautiful view of the geo nation.

sometimes you’d also have your date on mt. tianheng where you can see the whole harbor or in wangshu inn as per usual.

zhongli would def feed you lots of seafoods whenever his food has it (he hates it) and xiao will make sure the consultant-retired-god doesn’t feed you too much to the point when it makes you hate seafood as well.

zhongli and xiao would walk you home by the end of your date. they’ll swoon if you give them a goodbye kiss before leaving!

there were some days when you are only with one of them for the day since the other is busy.

if xiao is busy having to do something regarding to some threat to liyue, you’d be with zhongli.

with you and zhongli, the both of you would be in liyue harbor hanging out by having lunch in wanmin restaurant, shop around the marketplace (pls prevent zhongli from emptying his wallet), stroll around the town, and etc.

if zhongli is ever busy with his job in the wangsheng funeral parlor, you’re with xiao. often, the both of you would just stay by the top floor and enjoy the calming breeze. you’d also talk about your day or a random topic while xiao listens and comments when he wants to.

if you’re an adventurer, xiao will follow you (discreetly) depending on how dangerous the commissions are. he and zhongli have a share of knowing death and they both want you to never be involved with it.

if you try to tell xiao about your suspicions of him following you, he’ll probably deny it and say he’s “too busy protecting liyue and it’s probably your imagination.”

whenever you got bad injuries to the point where you need first aid, zhongli will happily nurse you while xiao lightly scolds you about being more careful.

since it’s their first time having a relationship, you’d mostly have to be the one to establish affection first.

it will take months or maybe a year for them to get used to these affections. once they’re used to it, they’ll start giving you lots of affection!

they’re the type of people to give you love through action and not words.

when it comes to their favorite way of showing affection, xiao is usually the one who likes to hold your hand while zhongli likes to give you kisses, mainly on the forehead.

when you are sad, they’ll try to find ways to make you happy. whether it’d be listening to you venting while cuddling, a break from what makes you sad (depending on the cause), give you gifts, or take you to your favorite place.

f in chat for the people who made you cry or sad, they’re gonna deal with the wrath of two powerful immortal (and mortal since zhongli is yknow...)

they’ll be very protective over you when it comes to the fatui— especially if childe is around. zhongli may have interacted with the fatui but he does not want you to be involved with them. which puts another reason why the three of you often hang out in the wangshu inn.

xiao will literally obliterate childe if he ever touches you (even though it’s just a high five or a friendly hug) if it weren’t for zhongli holding him back lmfao

as i mentioned in my liyue headcanon, fights with them are rare. however when there is a fight, it’s serious.

i can’t say what most of your fights are about since all of them are different but when you all fight, you try to solve it.

if they somehow made you walk out from them after a fight, they’ll apologize the next day with all of your favorite foods, trinkets, flowers, or maybe something that makes you forgive them.

your most memorable moment of them is your first lantern rite festival when you three watch the lanterns together by the mountain near the harbor.

their most memorable moment of you is your first date when you went to one of the mountains and have a picnic with them.

sometimes if you can’t sleep, you’d either visit zhongli and xiao— mostly zhongli since xiao is in wangshu inn. zhongli would give you tea to help you sleep and let you sleep with him.

if you’re up for late night talks, expect zhongli to tell you all of the stories he knows that he thinks that are interesting to you. his voice often lulls you to sleep.

if xiao is in your home, he’ll either listen to your rants or play his flute to you to lull you to sleep. if you’re okay with it, he’s willing to give you cuddles.

if there’s one thing zhongli and xiao worries most, it’s your mortality.

zhongli may be mortal now so it’s xiao who’s gonna have that burden most.

xiao has that vibe that he isn’t the type for a poly relationship when zhongli suggested but now that he experienced it, he’s scared of you and zhongli passing away.

i think he’ll know that zhongli is rex lapis (either from his suspicions or it was an accidental discovery) so that makes him even more worried on losing the both of you.

xiao would most likely go for a breakup just to save all of you from this worry— but thinking of having to avoid you just makes him wanna barf.

for now, when all is well and liyue is peaceful at the moment— xiao will just hold on to this relationship that he would consider as a sweet dream.

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221bshrlocked · 4 years ago

Text

taste you on my tongue

Pairing: The Mandalorian (Din Djarin) x Reader

Words: 9441 (I can’t fucking write anything shorter I’m sorry)

Warnings: Angst and Smut. Helmet is on and then it’s off. Oral (male receiving). Soft then rough sex. Breeding kink. Touch kink. Hand kink? Dirty/Sweet Talk. Mando feels primal when he sees you wearing his shirt and flirting with someone that isn’t him.

Summary: The Revenant was a fairly spacious gunship compared to others and you prided yourself in keeping it running for this long, especially after you were told it would soon lose its “life force.” But when a certain Mandalorian and his foundling join your ship following a disastrous mission, you find that the Revenant isn’t as big as you initially thought. In fact, it is much less private than you wish to admit and you find yourself escaping to a cantina one night to avoid the bounty hunter who isn’t aware of the effect he has on you. The problem is, the Mandalorian doesn’t like to share anything with anyone, and that rule applies to you. Unfortunately (or perhaps luckily) for you, you learn about this rule the hard way.

A/N: I hope yall like these because I’m currently spiraling down a Din Djarin hole and I’m not remotely apologetic. Let me know how it is in the comments and how I can make the smut better or the characterization better. Please, I can’t improve unless yall tell me what I’m doing wrong. Also, I promise to write more smut than angst next time. Enjoy :) And @purple-mango sorry it wasn’t as rough as you probably hoped, I was feeling soft Din but mark my words, the next one will be rough.

The obnoxious laughter coming from one of the corners of the cantina made you shake your head as the tavern-keeper approached you and motioned towards your glass. He smiled when you enthusiastically nodded and held out the finished drink, silently asking him to pour some more of the Tevraki whiskey because there was nothing you wanted more than to forget the past few months.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. There was something, or rather someone, that you wanted more than your need to set aside what’s been going on since that shitshow of a showdown on Tatooine. Coincidentally, or perhaps ironically, that someone had to do with what happened on the desert planet. You smiled at the man in front of you who knew better than to argue about how many drinks you’ve downed thus far.

As the thoughts slithered back to the source of your frustration, you couldn’t help but let your eyes take in your surroundings, shamelessly hoping to find someone who could fill that deep-seated need seeping through your chest and into your heart. No one would compare to him of course, and you knew that very well. But you couldn’t stand another hour on that ship without scratching that itch that’s been bothering you ever since he joined your ship with that annoyingly cute green goblin. You took a sip and returned your attention to the man wiping down the counter in front of you, already thinking of just skipping all the pleasantries and going back to his place.

“If you point him out to me, I can pay him a visit later and roughen him up a bit.” He leaned over and pointed behind you, pouring himself a shot of some weird blue drink before moving in closer to you again.

“Sorry?” You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, not understanding what he was referring to or if you had even begun a conversation with him.

“The sleemo that rejected you sweetheart. Why else would you be drowning in my best stuff?” He winked at you and you barely managed to not visibly gag at the ways his eyes raked over your form. Did he think this was the way to flirt?

“Maybe I just love drinking liquid fire, sweetheart. Have you thought of that?” You hoped you weren’t being too sarcastic with him because if there was the slightest chance of getting laid tonight, then you were going to do everything in your power to take it and run considering how there was no chance of you asking your now-permanent “roommate” for those kinds of services.

“Maybe. Either way, I’d love to help you forget about that sucker.” You took a deep breath and willed yourself to not punch him in the eye because the thought of being able to forget about the beskar-clad bounty hunter, even for a few hours only, sounded incredibly pleasant.

“Oh aren’t you sweet? So selfless and confident too.” You forced a smile before downing the rest of the whiskey and tapping on the glass again. If you were going to get fucked by someone like him, you needed at least three more drinks or else you wouldn’t be able to imagine the Mandalorian in his place. You chuckled at the depressing thought because here you were trying to forget about the man himself and yet went out of your way to make sure you were sort of able to pretend he was the one showing you the stars.

“Believe me darling, my intentions are strictly...honorable.” He poured you another drink and took a shot with you, his eyes widening in shock when you didn’t bother to wait another second before downing the whole glass in one go.

“Damn baby, he hurt you that bad?” You raised an eyebrow at his inquiry and didn’t know why the question bothered you so much. As much as you hated to admit it, the answer was a hard yes.

“Hah, hurt doesn’t even begin to cover it. And you know what the worst part is? He doesn’t even know he’s doing it.” You didn’t bother to ask him for another drink, jumping on top of the counter before leaning down and grabbing the whiskey bottle from the shelf right in front of his knees.

“You mean he’s still here?” He didn’t question your behavior, letting you take a long sip from the bottle before smiling down at your dazed expression.

“Here. There. Everywhere. He’s fucking everywhere all the damn time. I...he’s- maker...I can’t get him out of my kriffing mind. And the funny thing is, he probably doesn’t waste a second of thought on me. I’m just...someone with a fucking ride that can get him from one planet to the next.” You traced random patterns on the cold tile of the counter and didn’t realize that someone had occupied the seat just opposite of you and trying his hardest to ignore the way the patrons across the room continued to stare at you like you were a piece of meat.

“Darling, he isn’t worth your time. You need someone that...appreciates you. Tells you how good you’ve been.” You knew the man in front of you was just saying those lovely things to get in your pants but you couldn’t help the next few words from stopping even if you tried.

“Yes...gods, yes. Yes I do. But I wanted him to appreciate me. I wanted him to tell me how good I’ve been. I can’t blame him for not bothering to thank me though because it’s hard for him to hold a conversation longer than five minutes. I get that, he’s not used to it, he hasn’t needed to for so long. But it wouldn't hurt to acknowledge me every once in a while you know. I mean, do you know anyone else who’d willingly put their entire life on hold just to help some random introvert and his child find their way through this kriffing shithole of a system?” You knew you shouldn’t be saying any of those things out loud, let alone to a complete stranger. But he struck a nerve and you couldn’t take not another minute of not telling anyone how you truly felt. You needed to get some things off your chest and you sure as hell weren’t about to complain to the man waiting for you back on the ship.

“And- and do you know anyone that would readily give up their most valuable position in this world to a stranger they just met? I don’t.” You violently shook your head at him and felt your eyes fill with tears when you saw the way the man was looking at you. His eyes shot down to the bottle in your hand and you unceremoniously raised it to your lips before taking a long swig of the burning liquid, hoping by some miracle that this was enough to make you forget all about his stupid strut and his annoyingly low and gruff voice and the way he was so effortlessly kind to the kid.

“That ship. It’s- oh gah, it’s been with me through the worst fucking jobs. I fought for it, almost sold my kriffing bo-...almost sold something priceless to ensure it isn’t taken from me again. And it only takes some damn beskar-wearing, quiet, fucking who-knows-what-species nerfherder to save me once for me to voluntarily hand it over to him. Like it wasn’t a piece of me...like it wasn’t my home.” You were over sharing at this point and you noticed the way the man was beginning to lose interest in you so you made sure to grab his shirt and pull him closer to you before grabbing his forearm and digging your nails into it to keep his attention.

“Have you heard of the Revenant? You must have heard of the Revenant. There is no way you haven’t-”

“Yes, yes. I’ve heard of it.” He was exasperated but continued to attend to you, shamelessly letting his eyes follow a drop of whiskey roll down your shirt in between the valley of your breasts. You fixed your posture, pushing your tits together and giving him an eyeful of skin before ranting to him again.

“That’s my baby. My pride and joy. I always made sure everyone at the dock knew who it belonged to. Know why?” You grabbed his hand and pulled on it to make sure he was listening to you, laughing when he tiredly leaned down and forced himself to look away from your sweaty chest to your eyes.

“Enlighten me sweetheart.”

“Because it’s one of the biggest gunships out there. So much space that I don’t actually use. It’s a fucking beauty...but you know what? It’s all a lie. A sad, unfortunate lie. Because it took me spending the better half of the year with that kid and his tincan of a guardian to realize just how small it is. It’s like he put his mark on every corner of my home on purpose...just to drive me insane. Every time I sit somewhere where I’m sure he wouldn’t bother to come to, I’d still smell that- that...that fucking scent of his that I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what it is.” You had thankfully placed the whiskey bottle away from you and didn’t try to fight the tavern-keeper when he took it and put it back on the shelf, instantly returning to you to make sure you weren’t about to break anything.

“I even gave him my room. My room! Because ‘no one can see my face’ so he needs some privacy away from me but then there’s the whole ‘the child stays with me all the time’ and that womp rat can sleep in the little cot in my room with him while also giving him some privacy. Which leaves me, you guessed it, in the shitty lower deck where there is no door, not even a curtain, to give me some semblance of solitude.” You didn’t realize how harshly you were breathing until you stopped speaking and noticed the way the stranger continued to look at you.

“It has been a literal hell not being able to get myself off because he can walk in on me at any given moment. Picture that, not getting off for almost a year while being forced to remain in the same vicinity as him.” You didn’t care when you saw the man almost choke on his drink at your bold admission and looked around to make sure no one heard you. “Ughh, you’ve been such a good boy listening to me whining all night long and I think you deserve a treat.” You knew you had him as soon as he shivered at the way your fingers moved beneath his shirt and scratched his neck. “You look like the kind of guy that could fuck me within an inch of my life. Right?”

“Ah huh. Y-yeah.” He licked his lips before setting down the towel in his hands and inching closer towards you. And you silently swore at how absolutely pathetic he was because not a minute ago, he was trying to find a way out of this conversation and here he was thinking with his probably-disappointing dick.

“Good. And I promise to make it worth your while if you manage to make me forget his name.” You leaned across the counter and were about to kiss him when you saw something move across your peripheral vision, something that looked oddly familiar to your completely hazed mind.

“And what’s his name, baby? So I make sure you can’t rememb-” Before he could finish whatever he was about to say, you felt a large hand wrap around your upper arm and pull you back from the bartender and off of the stool. You almost tripped as you struggled to stand and huffed in anger before raising your voice to the distinguished individual who thought this was the time to fuck with you.

“Hey what are y-” You were about to take a swing at whoever it was currently bruising your arm when you followed the glint of the familiar metal and were met with your reflection staring right back at you. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you blinked in confusion a few times at the visor currently tilted in an almost judgemental manner at you before attempting to wipe your hair with your other hand.

The Mandalorian slowly changed his focus to the man behind the bar and threw a few credits at him, hands immediately lowering to the blaster in his side holster when he saw where the tavern-keeper’s eyes moved towards. The stranger could only hold up his hand in defeat before walking towards the other side of the bar to lick his invisible wounds. The Mandalorian’s helmet turned to the rest of the cantina, daring anyone to approach the two of you before you left. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to follow the two of you as you returned to the Revenant. He could feel his patience withering away with every passing moment you decided to share what’s on your mind with the rest of the universe but him.

“Let me go.” You whispered to him, eyes maintained to the ground and cringing when you felt his hold on your arm tighten at the request. Before you could ask him again, Mando was turning around and walking out of the busy cantina, pulling you along with him aggressively and not leaving any room for negotiation. You winced as he pulled you like a child through the streets, avoiding the concerned and intrigued looks you were receiving. He was much taller than you and you laughed when you realized it must have been a sight to see some random woman getting dragged along by an angry bounty hunter. Mando couldn’t help but turn towards you when he heard your giggles break the silence, his annoyance spiking because there was absolutely nothing humorous about this situation.

You noticed the way he was staring at you and decided to quiet down, swallowing the lump in your throat as the cold air hit your sweaty skin and made you shiver.

As you moved closer to the ship, you realized there was a chance he heard what you had to say about him and your ship. Hurt and anxiety rose up your throat and before you could attempt and control the all too familiar feeling, you were tripping over your feet and falling to the ground, instantly vomiting everything you’d managed to eat and drink in the last couple of hours.

The Mandalorian hoped his obviously misplaced outrage wasn’t what led you to such a violent reaction, and he kneeled down immediately to hold your hair away from your face. When he saw tears falling down your cheeks and how hard you were breathing beneath him, something snapped in his chest and he knew he was definitely the reason behind this severe response.

“Don’t- oh gah….kriffing look at me.” You spat in between words and turned away from him, holding onto your stomach and to the grass beneath you as you continued to empty your stomach in the middle of the forest. At least you weren’t in the city anymore.

“We’re close to the ship,” he didn’t know what else to say and chose to state the obvious instead, afraid of using a harsher tone with you. Actually, he did know what to say, he just didn’t trust himself to speak the words out loud yet.

“Wopty fucking doo for-” once again, you opened your mouth and dry heaved until you were sure there wasn’t a single drop of whiskey in your system, “you and your stupid kriffing-”

“Please Ad'ika, let me-” You visibly shook at the familiar endearment you’ve heard him whisper to the child so often when he thought you weren’t around. It hurt to know he was throwing it around as if he wasn’t twisting the knife inside your heart with every breath he took near you.

“Let m-me go, p-please.” Mando’s sudden intake of breath was as loud as the silence engulfing the two of you and you swallowed your pride before looking into his visor, well aware of how awful you must have looked without the reflection staring back at you. He, on the other hand, grasped in that moment just how deep your words in the cantina were and instead of listening to you and allowing you a moment alone, he took a deep breath before softly pushing back your hair and wrapping one arm around your waist. You didn’t have any time to question him as the other went beneath your thighs and before you knew it, you were holding onto his cowl for dear life as he quietly walked up the ramp of the Revenant with you in his arms.

Mando pushed in the code to shut the hatch before making his way through the quiet halls of the ship, reaching hi- your room and going straight to the bed he has occupied in the last few months. As he put you down, he took notice of your body language and knew instantly how self-conscious you must have felt laying on the bed he’s been using since he joined you. The same bed which you sort of commented about not an hour ago. He watched as you forced a smile as soon as you saw the familiar green little womp rat peeking its head right before descending from the safety of his crib and wobbling towards you.

You tried to leave the bed but Mando was ahead of you, gently pushing your shoulder until you realized there was no room for arguing with him. Leaning down, he took the kid and put him back in the crib before telling him he couldn’t cuddle with you tonight.

You kept your hands clasped together and refused to look at him, eyes taking in the room no longer familiar to you. He’d moved things around, even put things away that he didn’t need. Your gaze shifted towards him unintentionally as you saw him approach you with a cup of water and wet towel. Pushing the covers towards you, he sat near your thighs as he handed you the water and began to softly wipe at your cheeks and forehead.

You shut your eyes out of fear of giving more away just by staring at his visor and Mando thanked the stars you had because he wasn’t sure he could truly look at you if they were still open. It was a ridiculous thought because he was wearing a mask and you’d never know how much he loved committing all those little muscle twitches to memory. But it felt strangely intimate to return your gaze and he didn’t want to make you any more uncomfortable tonight.

You sighed heavily at his touch and felt pathetic at how starved you were for anything that had to do with him. The man was wearing gloves and wasn’t technically trailing his fingers over your skin but it still felt difficult to contain yourself.

When he was done, he stood up and moved to the refresher, giving you a few moments alone before he imposed on you again. You gulped down the water and placed the cup on the floor near you, looking out of the large window to your right and noticing the dark blue skies moving slowly above you. It took you a few minutes to recognize that what you were feeling was no longer hurt but confusion. He’s acted so differently tonight and you hated to think it was because he was pitying you. It didn’t matter anymore whether he’d heard what you said about him or not. He would have found out sooner or later, and if you were being honest, you felt like he probably had some inclination for a while before but chose to not bring any attention to the topic to save you from embarrassment and rejection.

“Get some rest.” You turned towards him again, not realizing he’d come back into the room and was standing right beside you. Mando tried his hardest not to give away any of his thoughts but you knew what he was thinking as soon as you saw his helmet tilt down just below your neck.

When you followed his line of sight, you felt ill again but for a completely different reason. Of course this would get worse. You weren’t planning on seeing him tonight and you told yourself you’d have plenty of time to change out of his shirt but it seemed that the universe was not making this any easier on you. Mando couldn’t stop staring at the shirt wrapped so loosely around your smooth skin and how large it looked on you. If he was a decent man, he would have turned away when he saw you shifting uncomfortably under his gaze but he couldn’t help taking in the way your body seemed to react to his presence and before he could think about it, he was stepping closer to the bed and reaching out to touch the material of his shirt falling down your shoulder.

“I- I’m sorry about your s-” The words died in your throat when you felt his gloved fingers trailing down your exposed clavicle and you were torn between asking him what he was doing and letting him carry on without interrupting his curiosity. Mando barely held himself back from pushing you down into the covers and taking what he now knew was his but he noticed the sudden goosebumps erupt on your skin and finally managed to meet your eyes through the visor. The way you were returning his gaze was perhaps too much for him and he flinched away from you, clearing his throat and willing himself to think of anything else but the way you were practically begging him to take you. You parted your lips to say something but couldn’t find your voice, afraid you’d push him more than he could take and drive him away all together.

“It’s fine. It’s...I don’t mi- forget about it. You need to rest.” He spoke softly before walking towards the cot nearby and pushing the crib out of the door.

“Wh-where will you sleep?” You sat up and knew he noticed how much you were holding onto every single interaction with him.

“Good night,” he didn’t bother to respond to the question, turning off the lights and shutting the door behind him before making his way to the cockpit. You sat in silence for a few moments before slithering under the covers, sighing in annoyance when you noticed just how much this entire room smelled like him. Pushing your face into the pillow, you took a deep breath and felt shaken to the core when you were hit with Mando’s distinctive scent: sweat, beskar, and that damn featherfern wash he somehow found every time you flew by Nevarro.

As you looked out the metal blinds, you tried to brace yourself for the conversation you were most definitely going to have with the Mandalorian the next day. You knew for a fact that whatever decision he’d take will ultimately hurt you because there were really only two options available, one of which involved him and the child leaving and the other would lead to them staying but making things awkward since there was not a single chance he would reciprocate your feelings.

And the worst part was, you weren’t sure which was more painful.

The Mandalorian sat quietly in the cockpit for a while, making sure you were asleep so as to not wake you up as he moved through the Revenant. Seeing that the kid was fast asleep, he found himself leaving the small space and navigating to the lower deck. He passed by your room and noticed the lights were off, sighing in relief at knowing that you were finally resting comfortably. Arriving at the lower deck, he stood at the entrance of the large room and felt his chest tighten once he took in the state of the space. Turning on the lights, he immediately noticed your makeshift cot in the far right corner, unable to stop himself from moving towards it to inspect it. He shook his head in anger but this time it was aimed at himself and not you or the random tavern keeper who couldn’t keep his eyes off of you.

How did he not know of this arrangement? And why did he not ask about your sleeping situation the day he joined your ship? Was he truly that unconcerned with anyone else but the kid or was it because he was reluctant to listen to Peli when she recommended you?

He’d only been in the lower deck for a few moments yet he felt his skin crawl with goosebumps. It was awfully cool down here and it took him another ten seconds to acknowledge that you’ve been living and sleeping here for this long without complaining once to him.

Everything you said about him earlier tonight crashed into him like a wave of guilt and he couldn’t stay in the room any longer, making his way back to the upper deck to try and figure out what he would say to you come tomorrow. As he slowly moved through the dark hallways of the Revenant, he heard a faint voice coming from the upper deck, muscles tensing instantly when he walked past your room and noticed you weren’t on the bed.

Not wanting to disturb you, he waited right outside the cockpit and listened to you humming to the child. He must have woken up and found his way back to you. As he crossed his arms and stood behind the door, he couldn’t help but notice how soft your voice was as you continued to sing a lullaby to the little womp rat.

How could he have not noticed…

“There you go, you little green goblin. If only I could sleep as quickly as you.” You whispered to him before tucking him into the crib while continuing to rub his abnormally large ears. “Your dad is really funny...thinking I’d be able to sleep in that room with his scent all over it.”

Maker, how were you so forthright with everyone but him? It hurt to know that he wasn’t someone you could whisper your little secrets to. Then again, it made sense since all of your secrets seemed to involve him.

“I pray he doesn’t tell me he has to leave now that he knows I...ughh, for both of our sakes little one.” Mando noticed the way you seemed incapable of finishing your sentences whenever you spoke about him and a deep part of him wished you would, if only to hear the adoration in your words. Rarely anyone spoke of him so softly and he had a feeling he’d only ever accept such words from you. It was quiet for a few minutes before he heard you whisper to the kid again.

“It just hurts to know that he’ll never see me as...as a-” He wasn’t sure if it was the heartbreaking tone of your voice or if it was the way you were reluctant to say your heart’s desire out loud but Mando couldn’t stand another second of you thinking you weren’t important to him.

“As a what?” His voice came out harsher through the vocoder and he winced at himself when he vaguely heard you jumping from the chair. A soft hiss came from the cockpit and he took a deep breath when he realized you’d just shut the crib and moved to leave the room. As you stepped out, Mando forced his eyes to remain on your face, refusing to look at your exposed legs or the way his shirt seemed to end right beneath your upper thighs.

Softly shutting the door, you walked to the opposite side of the room and knew the Mandalorian must have noticed your need to put as much space between the two of you as possible.

“We need to stop running into each other like this,” you laughed awkwardly and anxiously ringed your fingers, glancing at his visor before turning away and looking everywhere else but him. Okay, so humor wasn’t going to get you out of this situation.

“How’s your head?” You could feel how on edge he was and decided to answer with short and straightforward responses just to avoid any more awkwardness.

“M-much clearer.” You stood in silence until you heard the Mandalorian pushing off of the opposite wall and heading towards you. You didn’t have anywhere to go, eyes snapping to the door right behind him and knowing there was no way you could try to walk around him.

He stopped a couple of feet away from you and you ceased to breathe when you noticed how awfully close he was to you.

“Answer my question.” His voice was dangerously low and you found it difficult to try and think of anything to say when he was giving you no room to breathe.

“I- I did?” Your voice was far from confident and you watched as he gently took off both of his gloves before shoving them into his pockets. Even though he willingly removed them in front of you, you didn’t allow yourself to look at his skin, afraid you’d somehow offend him and his Creed. But then you saw his hand move towards your face, and gasped when you felt his fingers tilting your chin so you were looking into his visor. There was not an inclination of an emotion available to you but you forced yourself to keep your eyes open nonetheless.

“How do you want me to see you Mesh'la?” Mando whispered down to you and you swore his voice was hoarse as he spoke to you but you didn’t allow this moment to get to your head. It would hurt more than anything if…

“It d-doesn’t matter.” You blinked away the tears, wanting to wipe your face before anymore were shed but not finding it in yourself to move away from him. But then you felt his thumb softly rubbing at your wet skin, making you almost lose your composure as soon as he stepped closer in your space until your back hit the wall.

“I’m sorry Cyar'ika,” his chest was inches from your face, cornering you beneath his other arm before leaning down and resting his forehead against yours. You couldn’t breath, not when he was suddenly filling all of your senses as if it was the most natural thing to do. He felt your tears roll around his thumb and couldn’t bear the thought of you crying because of him.

“I’m sorry for making you think you don’t matter...you do, not just to the kid but- but to me as well.” Your knees gave out on you as soon as you heard Mando’s confession, barely managing to grab onto his forearms right before buckling against him. The Mandalorian wasn’t sure if that was the kind of reaction he was looking for but he immediately wrapped his arms around your back and legs before pulling you against his chest. You nuzzled into his chest and kept a tight hold on him as he walked through the dimly lit hallways back to your room. He could feel goosebumps take over the skin of your thighs where he was touching you and tried to distract himself from pushing you down into the middle of the Revenant and taking you right then and there. You deserved more than that.

As he reached the room and laid you on the bed, he felt your fingers clasp onto him harder and when his eyes trailed over your face, he knew you were silently begging him not to leave.

“I’m not going anywhere Ad'ika.” His reassuring tone tugged at your heart and you swallowed the lump in your throat as you watched him walk to the door and shut it behind him before moving to the refresher. You heard him shuffle around and allowed your mind to calm down, knowing very well that Mando wasn’t unkind and wouldn’t lead you on just to leave you. But then he walked out without his beskar armor and you swore you died and joined the stars. His helmet looked odd without his normal clothing and you knew he could probably see you shamelessly ogling him from across the room.

He walked to you and stood to the side, and you realized he was probably nervous. You pushed yourself against the wall and threw back the covers, hoping he’d understand what you wanted of him.

“Can I-”

“Please.” You cut him off before he could finish his question and he took a deep breath before laying on the bed and moving as close to you as possible. Before he could throw the covers over the two of you, you were already laying your head on his chest and wrapping an arm around him, fingers fisting into the soft material of his shirt unintentionally as you felt him relax beneath you.

You weren’t sure how long it’s been but you felt his heart rate finally come back to normal. Hoping you weren’t being too forward with him, you took his hand into yours and brought it to your lips, softly kissing his knuckles before turning his palm over to lay a kiss on his wrist. Mando was losing every ounce of control left in his body and his arm tightened around your back as soon as he felt the tip of your tongue against his hand.

“Pfassk,” you flinched at the rough expletive and raised your head to look at him, finding his visor already tilted down towards you. “I- I’m sorry I’ll stop if-”

“No..n-no, don’t stop. It just- you took me by surprise.” His chest was rising and falling more rapidly and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was as affected by this new level of ‘intimacy’ as you were, if not more.

You felt bold at his request, kicking the covers away before sitting up and moving to straddle his thighs. Mando was breathing harshly and mirrored your actions, sitting up against the cool metal of the wall before laying his hands on top of your exposed thighs. He let himself take in the way your skin flushed under his touch and smiled to himself when he continued to inch his smooth hands over your upper thighs until his shirt rid up your legs and revealed the pastel color of your undergarment.

“Cyar'ika…” He sighed when he finally forced himself to meet your eyes and found them dilated until there was barely any color left in them. You wanted to ask him what that word meant but chose to file it for later. Placing your hands on top of his, you smiled down at him before pulling them towards your lips and kissing his palms. Almost instantly, you felt him twitch against you, unable to control himself from bucking his hips against your heated core. You let go of his hands and laid your own on his chest, throwing your head back when you felt his tight grip on your thighs. You could tell he wanted to apologize but gave him no chance to do so, sliding against him until you were sure he was painfully hard beneath you.

“Maker...I- I could almost taste you on my tongue Mando. When you- you left me in here all by myself. I couldn’t sleep, n-not when I could smell you on these covers, not when I could feel you on my skin. I..gods, wanted to kiss you then, and- and I wanted to taste your- you...Please, c-can I? P-please-” You dug your nails into his chest and heard him throw his head back against the wall with every confession you moaned to him. He was never this unhinged and you wished to see him come absolutely undone at your touch.

“A-are you sure?” It pained him to ask but he needed to be sure that you wouldn’t regret this. Regret him.

“Mando, have you not listened to anything I’ve said tonight?” As much as you hated to remind him of the earlier and rather embarrassing events, you wanted him to know just how much he meant to you. You knew he was reluctant to let this relationship move forward and you couldn’t really blame him. This was all new to him. But you also didn’t want to stall, not when the two of you have become so aware of the other’s feelings.

You continued to rub yourself on him, shaking with anticipation when you heard him moan through the vocoder as you pressed yourself more confidently down on him.

“Mesh'la I-” Without warning, you took one of his hands and pushed it to your lips, slowly taking two of his fingers into your mouth and swirling your tongue around them until his moans grew louder. And when he pushed his fingers deeper into your mouth, you gripped his wrist tightly and groaned, making sure he could feel how much you wanted him.

“Y-you’re killing me sweet girl.” He wanted to loosen his hold on you, to take things slow, to not let himself get carried away with you, but he didn’t find it in himself to be gentle because he could feel how wet and needy you were above him and there was no way he was going to waste another second not being close to you.

“Please Mando, I want you, n-need to have you. I can make you feel so good. Please, can I?” You reached down and cupped him through his pants, finding him as hard as the beskar of his armor. He thrust up into your hand and swore violently before taking his hand away from your mouth and fisting it into your hair. You smiled when you felt him push you off of him, whispering something in Mando’a when he saw you pulling his pants down his thighs and throwing them behind you.

You bit your lower lip before moving off of the bed and pushing his legs along with you as well. Mando sat up and forced his hands to remain by his side, afraid his enthusiasm would make him get too rough with you and scare you away. When you laid your hands on his knees and pushed them wide open so you could get comfortable between his legs, Mando’s hands tightened around the covers and he hissed when he saw the way you were eyeing his cock. You were staring at him like he was a piece of meat and he wasn’t sure if he loved it or was embarrassed by it.

“Maker,” you whispered before dragging your nails up and down his thighs, watching as his cock twitched against his stomach every time you got a little aggressive with your touches. Looking up into his visor, you slowly leaned down and took the tip of his cock in your mouth, humming around him as you tasted precum leaking into your taste buds. That seemed to do it for him because one of his hands shot to the back of your head and fisted into your hair while the other moved down until it landed on your hand. He intertwined his fingers with yours and watched as you pulled back and licked the underside of his dick before spitting into your hand and wrapping it around him.

“M-mando, the taste of you,” you took as much of him in your mouth as possible while maintaining eye contact with his helmet, squeezing the base of his cock before reaching down and cupping his balls. Mando swore, involuntarily thrusting into your mouth and watching in awe as he saw a dangerous glint in your eyes right before you clasped his hand harder and somehow managed to take him in deeper. It was such a sight, holding affectionately onto your hand as you brought him to pleasure. Letting go of him with a pop, you laid wet kisses down the length of his cock, licking the protruding veins and smiling when you felt his hold tighten on your hair. “Is absolutely addicting.”

You could tell the exact second he lost all semblance of control because one minute you were kneeling at his feet, and the next thing you knew, Mando was pulling you up by your hair and throwing you beneath him on the bed. You wiped your lips with the back of your hand, watching his muscles flex as he removed his shirt expertly over his helmet. The soft starlight coming through the metal blinds of the window shone onto his skin and you trailed your gaze down his chest, finding the golden brown tone of his scarred body absolutely breathtaking.

“Mando, you’re beautiful.” You saw his hands begin to shake at your compliment, and you knew you’d take every chance you get from now on to tell him how much you adored him. You could hear him breathing through the mask and licked your lips when he looked down and saw the way you were playing with the hem of his shirt. Slowly, you began to pull on the soft material, about to take it off when he held onto your wrists. Your smile faltered for a second and hoped you didn’t somehow misunderstand his intentions.

The last thing Mando wished to see was your body giving away to shyness before him. Pushing your thighs open, he didn’t give you a chance to say anything else as he slid his fingers below the thin undergarment, violently ripping it off of you and discarding it onto the floor. You gasped when you felt him hard and heavy against your slit, taking both of his hands and pulling him towards you until he was only a hairbreadth away. He watched closely as you placed one hand around your throat while the other descended to your breast. You could tell Mando was reluctant to move so much an inch and when you pushed yourself against him, eyes daring him to do as he wishes, he found himself completely overtaken with the thought of you belonging to him and him only. You smiled when you felt the grip on your throat tighten, shutting your eyes and arching your back against him as the other cupped and pinched at your nipples through his shirt.

“If you want me to fuck you tonight, Mesh'la, then you’re going to keep my shirt on.” He could feel you shaking in his arms and smiled to himself at the knowledge of how much he affected you.

“Mando, please…” You would have continued begging him if he asked you to, but then he was moving away from you and leaning towards the window. Keeping your hands clasped to your chest, you watched as he shut the blinds until there wasn’t a single light shining into the room. You could barely see your own hands in the dark and wondered why he was shuffling above you. A soft hissing sound had you tensing in an instant and you ceased to breathe when you heard the faint sound of beskar hitting the ground.

“M-mando?” The question was more reluctant than inquisitive and you didn’t have time to react as you felt him lean against you until you were touching every inch of his skin. You blinked a few times in vain, knowing there was no way you would be able to see anything. But then you felt something soft brush against your cheek and as you turned your head towards him, Mando was molding his lips with yours, swallowing your gasps and sucking on your tongue as soon as you melted into him. He pulled away against his own will, but not before pushing your jaw with his nose until your neck was available to him.

“And my name is Din sweet girl, Din Djarin. It better be the only word you scream tonight as I fuck this pretty little cunt. Understood?” You weren’t sure if it was his deep voice that made you speechless or the fact that he not only took off his helmet for you but willingly told you his name as well. You committed it to memory, hoping this wouldn’t be the only time he took off his helmet around you. You’d always wondered what he sounded like without it, not comprehending that it could be so much sweeter than what you’ve dreamed of. And by the gods, his lips. How were they so soft and gentle? Maker, he had a stubble too, not a rough one but just long enough to tickle your neck as he kissed and nipped at your clavicle.

“Answer me Ad'ika.” He bit your shoulder to grab your attention once more, chuckling above you when you nodded frantically against him.

“You’re so soft Cyar'ika, I- I want to kiss every inch of your skin.” As much as you loved making him lose his mind at your touch, you had to admit you enjoyed him much more when he was in control. You smiled when he kissed along your shoulder before pushing down his shirt far enough to expose your breasts. Din bit down on his lower lip to contain himself, but then you were arching your back and pushing yourself into him and he couldn’t hold back. He kissed down your sternum, waiting until you relaxed in his arms before assaulting your nipples. You screamed his name as you felt his teeth tug on your nipple, hands shooting to his hair when you felt him grope and pull on the other.

“Din, oh ma-maker- your mouth is...f-fuck.” You could tell he was smiling as he aggressively licked the hardened bud before sucking on it again. Din pushed his cock against your wet slit, growling when you pulled on his hair and cried his name like a sweet prayer.

“I could smell your cunt sweet girl, so fucking wet and hot and ready for me.” Din pulled back and cornered you between his arms, bucking his hips into you until you were a needy and moaning mess beneath him. “Woke up countless times in this bed...hard and aching at the mere thought of you...d-dreaming of having you in my arms, wanting to sink into you, f-fuck you on every inch of this ship.”

“Din, please...I need you.”

The way you clawed at his back broke him and before he knew what he was doing, he was flipping you on your stomach and raising your hips against him.

“I need to have you Mesh'la.” Din leaned down and swiped your hair to the side, whispering the filthiest things in your ears as he took hold of his cock and rubbed it against your heat.

“I’m yours Din, do what you want. Fuck me, ruin me...cum in me if you wish. Just p-please-”

You made it sound so simple, trusting him. It was an odd feeling to know how easily you were giving yourself to him. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise, not after what you said tonight. But something about the way you offered yourself to him, especially with that last request, had him seeing stars.

Leaning down until his chest was sliding against your back, the Mandalorian held you against him with one arm across your front while he slowly slipped into your wet cunt. You sighed in unison, and Din felt a sense of pride fill his chest when you dug your nails into his arm while your legs began to shake beneath him.

“You’re a dream Cyar'ika, the best f-fucking dream I could ever have. And you’re all mine.”

“Y-yes, yours. I’ve always been yours, oh gods Din please, move. M-move.” You were babbling at this point but couldn’t find it in yourself to care, turning your head to the side just to feel him breathe against your cheek. His stubble rubbed deliciously at your heated and sensitive skin, and you would tell him later that you hoped he’d mirror those actions but elsewhere.

“So tight darling, I- you’re everything. The things I- uhhh, the thing I want to do to you.” Din achingly pulled out before snapping into you again, biting down on your shoulder when you clenched violently around him.

“Din, oh Din-” You wished you could tell him how good he felt, how much he filled you, how often you craved having him inside you and how much you were losing it now that he was. But you couldn’t find a single word, not when he was fucking you like you were it for him.

The normally quiet man was groaning and hissing above you, pulling you along with him as he sat up and continued to fuck you relentlessly. You reached back and held his head against your neck, crying in pain and pleasure when he picked up the pace and his hold on your hip tightened. You were sure there would be bruise marks the next day but you couldn’t tell him to slow down or be a little less aggressive, not when you finally had him where you’ve wanted for so long.

“Fuck, fuck….sweet girl, did- did you mean it?” He was asking you something and you didn’t really pay attention to him, focusing on the way he deliciously dragged against your tight walls over and over again. Din knew it wasn’t fair to ask you anything right now but he had to know. Needed to.

He stopped his movement all together, sinking as deep into you as possible and tightening his grip on your throat.

“Pfassk...answer me darling.” Din whispered into your ears and reached down to where you were joined, softly slapping your clit until you twitched and begged him to repeat his words again.

“I said, did you fucking mean it when- kriffing hell, when you said I could...c-cum in you?” He was reluctant to ask but there was no point in denying either of you.

“Yes, gods yes. I told you Din, d-do what you want with me.” You forcibly loosened the fingers around your throat and brought them to your lips, biting the palm of his hand as he resumed thrusting into you.

“Mesh'la...you’re such a sweet girl, letting me b-breed you...taking my cock so well, letting me fill you up. You were made for me darling. This cunt, this sweetest and tightest kriffing pussy was made for my cock.” He pronounced each word with a harsh push of his hips and you smiled when you heard how low his voice suddenly became. The sounds of skin slapping on skin filled the room and you hoped the child wouldn’t wake up from how loud the two of you were being.

“You’re mine darling. Won’t let anyone else touch you...fucking look at you even. Maker I- I almost lost it tonight in the cantina.” There was a hint of self-consciousness in his words and you hoped he didn’t think you could ever replace him.

“D-din..” You wanted to tell him no one else would compare but he didn’t give you a chance.

“Talking about me like I- fuck, like I didn’t care about you, like I don’t picture you coming on my cock every waking moment of my day. And flirting with him in my shirt...my kriffing shirt. I almost lost it when he put his hands on you sweet girl.” You weren’t sure if he had somehow become harder inside you or if it was his words that made you attuned to the feeling of him pushing into your cunt but you turned your head and kissed his cheeks, hoping he’d understand what you were trying to tell him with your touches.

“You’re the only one f-for me.” Din let go of your neck and held onto your hips, no longer caring about how rough he was being with you. Your heavy sighs were the only warning he had right before your tight walls convulsed around his dick and he continued to fuck you through your orgasm, falling on top of you and bucking his hips slowly into your cunt until you begged him to slow down.

“Cyare, ah pfassk, that’s it. Keep squeezing me darling. I’m so close, so close. Ah fuck, you’re mine. Mine, not letting you go. N-never letting you go. Oh maker...ner runi...ner. Ner. Riduur. My sweet girl...riduur.” Din didn’t realize what he’d said until the words were left hanging in the air and he felt a rush of relief wash over him as he finally admitted how he felt about you.

“Din, I lo- ahh gods please.” He silenced your screams with his hand, losing his rhythm as he came in hot spurts of cum inside you. Din bit down onto your shoulder just as you bit on the palm of his hand, continuing to push his seed deep inside you until he felt you a mixture of your juices seeping out of you. Neither of you moved for a few moments, relishing the way you fit so perfectly with each other. You could feel him breathing heavily against your back and smiled with pride when you realized you were the only one that got to see him like this.

Din didn’t want to stop touching you, falling to the side and grabbing your flush to him only to hiss when you unintentionally clenched around his softening cock. You kissed his wrist as he pulled the covers over the two of you, not bothering to move a muscle mostly because you knew he didn’t wish for you to leave him.

He kissed along the bruised ridges of your shoulders, drawing circles on your navel and smiling when you giggled beneath him.

“I wasn’t too rough with you was I?” He asked embarrassingly, not knowing what he’d do if you said yes.

“You were perfect Din...you- you are perfect.” You turned your head far enough in hopes of catching his attention, letting out a deep breath when he leaned over and captured your lips in a chaste kiss. He was so soft and you didn’t know which side of him you enjoyed more but you were sure you wanted to get to know him, all of him. His likes and dislikes.

“Far from it Mesh'la. I...I went to the lower deck and saw where you’ve been sleeping.”

“Oh…”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Din rose on his elbow, seeking your hands in the dark and holding onto your fingers as he raised your hand to his mouth and kissed along your hand.

“I- I didn’t want to make you think you weren’t welcome. Peli told me about the Creed and well, there isn’t any sort of privacy down there really. And the kid would’ve been cold. I know how much he likes to cuddle next to you when he sleeps.”

“But you’ve been-”

“I’ve slept in worse conditions, believe me.” He didn’t say anything else in response but you knew he was very much thinking about it.

“Din, I wouldn’t change a single moment. Not one. Because each one led me here, to this bed, in your arms. I would relive every mission and every cold night and every awkward conversation again if I knew I’d end up here with you. You’re the closest thing I have to a..a-”

“Family.” He broke the silence before lying back down and pulling you as close to him as possible.

“Promise me you won’t get drunk by yourself in a cantina again.” You wished you didn’t laugh out loud at the random request because Din swore behind you before his grip loosened a bit.

“I’m sorry I...I didn’t mean to laugh. It’s just, here I am pouring my heart out and the only thing you could follow up with was that.” When he didn’t say anything in return, you grabbed his arm and pulled him back to you. “And yes, I promise not to get drunk in a cantina by myself ever again.”

“Good.”

“But I can’t really make any promises about not flirting with anyone because if it means I get to have you all hot and bothered then-”

“Sweet girl, you’re going to regret ever thinking of that…”

Translations:

Sleemo - This Huttese insult was pronounced slay-mo and translated as "slimeball," a rude insult.

Ad'ika - Little one

Mesh'la - Beautiful

Cyar'ika - Darling/Sweetheart

Pfassk - An adaptable expletive

Cyare - Beloved

Ner - Mine.

Runi - soul; only used poetically

Riduur - partner, spouse, husband/wife

#The Mandalorian fanfiction #The Mandalorian x Reader #The Mandalorian smut #mando x reader #Mando smut #Mando fanfiction #Din Djarin x Reader #Din Djarin smut #Din Djarin fanfiction #The Mandalorian #Din Djarin #Pedro Pascal #star wars #star wars fanfiction #baby yoda #grogu

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inomios · 4 years ago

Text

Eight types of love II Levi Ackerman

Summary: “There are eight types of love, and even though his life has been full of pain since the very beginning, he could say he experienced them all.”

Genre: Angst and Fluff

Word count: + 5k

Author note: This is the first thing I’ve ever published and I’m really nervous, so I would really appreciate if you reblogged, liked and commented. Also, English is not my first language, so I’m sorry for any mistakes. Constructive criticism is really appreciated.

. . . .

1. AGAPE or Selfless love

His mother would tell him everyday that she loved him with everything she had, even though it was not a lot. He asked his mother what love was, what meant loving someone. She couldn’t explain it with exact words, she would tell him that love meant caring deeply for someone, even more than for yourself. She loved him and he loved her, that much was true. He asked if he could love more than one person, his mom told him that yes, you could love many people in your life and in different ways. Then, he proceeded to ask if she had ever loved anyone else besides him, she was quiet, like she was thinking the right answer and after a few minutes she said that she had or at least she thought she did, but she had never loved someone as much as she loved him. Love was a confusing thing for him and the more he asked, the more unclear it got.

The only thing he was sure of was that the only thing she loved was her mother. However, curious as he was, he would ask her questions about it all the time.

‘Is love the best thing in the world?’

‘Yes, Levi, it is the only thing that makes life worth it.’

‘Is love always good?’

‘Not always, sometimes it makes you sad.’

‘I don’t wanna be sad. I won’t love anyone else but you.’

‘You can’t choose who you love, sweetie.’

‘Love sucks.’

‘You will get it when you grow up.’

‘I’m already a grown-up.’

He tried to get it, but he couldn’t. He prided himself of being smart, his mom would always tell him that he was really clever and witty for his age. Then, how come he wasn’t able to understand love. It was just a four-letter word: L-O-V-E, it couldn’t have such a deep meaning. ‘Door’ had also four letters and it wasn’t hard to understand and ‘Scandalous’, pretty much the biggest word for him, had ten letters and he knew what it meant, he could even use it in a phrase.

His mom, noticing that he was about to collapse trying to figure out what has love, tried to come up with the best possible definition, one that would please his five-year old son.

‘Love is a selfless thing. Love means giving everything you have, to make the other person happy and content, even though you may not get back all you give. When you love someone, you only what the best for them. It can cause you pain too but loving someone and being loved back is one of the best things we can experience as humans. We may not have a lot, Levi, but we have each other and more important, we love one another and that makes us privileged.’

He understood it then, kind of, so the questions stopped.

However, when his mother’s body laid lifeless in bed, he regretted not making one last question: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

Later, when he was under Kenny’s wing and after Kenny had left him at his own, he soon found an answer: no one would.

2. PHILIA or Affectionate love

After his mother’s death, after Kenny, after everything, he thought that love was out of his reach, something he could never have again. Then Isabel and Farlan happened.

Every single day since his mother died, he would ask himself if he would love again and if someone would love him back. However, at the same time, he wanted to know nothing about love, love brought pain and he had already suffered enough for a lifetime. He sometimes thought that he had an emptiness inside, a big hole where his heart should be, a room so big that no one could ever fill.

After his mom came Kenny, but he was sure he did not love him, at least not like he had loved his mother, and he was sure as hell Kenny did not love him back. Love was supposed to be selfless and caring and Kenny was selfish and did not give a damn about him, he proved him that when he left him alone, again.

Loneliness was a feeling he was already used to but being used to it didn’t mean he liked it. Then again, who would be dumb enough to love him? And he knew better than to love someone who would end up leaving him, like his mother did, like Kenny did.

Well, maybe he did love Kenny, but loving him was painful. While loving his mother was sweet, freeing and it brought him solace and comfort; loving Kenny was toxic and tough, when he thought about it, it troubled him. He gave him a home and he taught him how to survive in the Underground, he didn’t know why, but he raised him, and Kenny never did something freely, he was sure something was missing there, but he didn’t know what. It was stupid of him to think that he cared about him, but a little white lie never hurt anyone. Loving Kenny, seeing him as the paternal figure he never had, filled him with turmoil and changed the way he perceived love.

Love was weakness, it could bring you to your knees, he had learned that. It was pointless, why would you commit to something that would inevitably bring you sorrow? He wasn’t about to make the same mistake again, he knew better, the only person who would stay with him was himself and that wasn’t about to change.

Then Isabel and Farlan walked into his life. Well, Farlan walked, Isabel stumbled.

They became family. He knew better but he couldn’t help it. They were thick as thieves, literally. Suddenly, they became the family he yearned for since his mother died. He loved them with everything he had. Loving them was selfless as his mother said, he wanted the best for them, he wanted to see them happy, no matter the price. However, it was a different kind of love, it was pure affection. It wasn’t the adoration he had for his mother, nor the rage he felt for Kenny. It was tender and sweet, he never had a brother or a close friend to care about while growing up, but he thought it was supposed to feel like that, it had to be like that. It had to be another type of love. His mother told him that love was never the same, it had different shapes and, for him, at that moment love had Isabel and Farlan’s shape.

Sadly, nothing good lasts forever, at least not for him. Love causes pain and brings you to your knees, he shouldn’t have forgotten that. When he saw Isabel’s head laying on the floor surrounded by a puddle of her own blood, mouth agape, eyes wide open and pale face, he fell to his knees. He saw a supercut of him, Isabel and Farlan, all the good times, all the laughs they shared and all the stories they still had to write but they would never be able to do because they weren’t there, not anymore, they were gone like his mother, like Kenny. He was alone again.

Love always brought him to his knees and he would never forget it again. He wasn’t made for love; the same way love wasn’t made for him.

3. LUDUS or Playful love

Meeting you happened out of pure coincidence, being in the right place at the wrong time.

He had come from a long mission and he was completely and utterly fine, seriously, but Hange loved to make a big deal out of everything. Well, maybe he had an injury, but a minor one, nothing that he couldn’t take care of himself. He spent years in the Underground, he didn’t need a doctor, he could stitch himself up and place his bones back in place. However, Hange didn’t think the same and was nagging him about getting his injuries checked, so there he was, in one of the infirmary’s bed, waiting for the head doctor.

It wasn’t that he was scared of doctors or “hospitals”, he just didn’t like the idea of some stranger touching him or feeling hopeless and powerless, he didn’t like feeling like he needed help or advice, he could do it pretty much on his own. But Hange didn’t really trust his medical abilities and he knew that arguing with her was pointless.

‘Doctor Brunner couldn’t come since he is busy with some paperwork, so he sent me. I’m his trainee y/n y/ln.’

‘I’m not letting some failed attempt of medic treat my wounds.’

It wasn’t what people would call a ‘meet cute’ moment, it was more like a ‘meet jerk’. He wasn’t the best dealing with people, nor that he wanted to be, he preferred it that way. If you had been any other person, you wouldn’t have bitten back, but you had a sharp tongue and weren’t scared of him. That was probably what drew him in, he was so used to people recoiling in fear when they saw him that having someone that actually fought back was quite alluring.

‘Well, this failed attempt of a doctor knows more than you ever will, so act your age, stop being a bitch and let me tend your injuries.’

‘You have some nerve talking to me like that.’

‘You have some nerve coming to my workplace to insult me.’

During that first encounter none of you said much to each other. He wasn’t fond on talking and you didn’t like his attitude, so you didn’t try to strike a conversation. He had to admit that you were good at you job, you tended him with care and you knew what you were doing, not that he would tell you, at least not yet.

‘Well, not so bad for a failed attempt of a doctor.’

It was the closest thing to a compliment he could say, and it looked like you knew, because he swears that he saw you smile a little.

‘Aren’t you a pleasure to work with? The injury in your arm was pretty nasty and poorly treated, so luckily for you, you will have to drop by more times to check on you. These are my hours, if you want this failed attempt of a doctor to treat you, Captain. I could get used to see your friendly face now and then.’

He didn’t know if the last part was supposed to be interpreted as flirting, but he did come back to visit you, to keep an eye of his injury, obviously. However, if you asked Hange, she would say that you had caught his eye, he still says that at that point in your relationship you annoyed him too much to find himself interested in you.

His weekly visits turned into daily visits, so much for not liking you.

‘I’m starting to think I’ve managed to catch your attention, Captain.’

‘Tch, you’re just less annoying than the rest of the brats.’

‘Oh Captain, you really know how to make me blush.’

He lied. You did catch his attention and you both knew it. It wasn’t love, not at all, it was a gentle curiosity that grew a little bit every day, like a flower blossoming.

‘Tch, you only know to say shit with that mouth of yours.’

‘This mouth of mine knows to do a lot of things, want me show you, Captain?’

‘When you return from the expedition, you have to come to the infirmary to see your wounds and stop playing the hero, it’s bullshit.’

‘I’m starting to think you may have an obsession for doing check-ups on me, brat.’

‘You caught me, I only do them because I can’t keep my hands of you, Captain.’

‘Why do you always call me Captain? It’s annoying, I’m not your superior.’

‘I know, but I like teasing you with it, Captain.’

He cared for you more than he cared for other people in his life, he liked being with you, maybe that was another type of love. Loving his mother was selfless; loving Isabel and Farlan was affectionate; loving you, or whatever the hell he was felling, was playful, flirty and it filled him with joy.

Maybe it wasn’t love, but it was getting there.

4. MANIA or Obsessive love

Your relationship was frustrating everybody, absolutely every single person that knew about you two, everybody knew you had feelings for each other but none of you did something about it, you just kept tiptoeing around each other. It was painful to see. They didn’t know if you were oblivious, stupid, scared or if you were just messing with them, Hange believed the latter one because there was no way you two weren’t together already. The banter, the flirty remarks, the way he looked out for you and the way you took care of him.

‘What’s going on with you and y/n, Shorty?’

‘You tell me, Four-eyes’

‘Tell me the truth, y/n. Are you and Levi dating and just keeping it as a secret? Because I’m losing my mind.’

‘We aren’t dating, Hange.’

To be honest, Levi was losing his mind too. The playful game turned into something more serious, something more obsessive and he didn’t like it. He couldn’t stop thinking about you and what were you doing while he was busy with paperwork. On missions his mind wandered about your wellbeing and if you were fine. He couldn’t ignore the way his heartbeat became erratic whenever you were close to him or the way he would notice every single thing about you. He felt powerless, there was no way to stop it.

He, who always had a plan and knew to do, was helpless under something he could have prevented, or at least something he think he could have avoided. Deep down he knew that he would have fallen for you one way or another, some things are bound to happen, and love is one of them, but he didn’t want to admit that something as mundane as love could outpower him in his own life.

He was aware of how you felt about him, you weren’t scared to be vocal about it and it drove him mad, and by the way his stoic eyes would gleam and glisten while looking at you, you were certain it was mutual. He knew that if he said the word or gave you signal, you’d be his and he’d be yours, but he couldn’t give you what you wanted, and it was a matter of time before you got tired of him. You were young and beautiful, one the most outstanding creatures he had ever seen, you could do better than him and you’d realize soon enough. Life was too short to waste it on him.

‘What are you waiting for, Levi? Do something about it because it’s getting painful to watch.’

‘Get off my fucking case, Four-eyes.’

Everyone was waiting for him to do something, but he couldn’t. In those moments he remembered the question he wasn’t able to ask his mother: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’ His mother loved him, and she died, just like Isabel and Farlan, he couldn’t love you, because he’ll end up losing you, the same way he lost everyone else.

He was loveless.

But you weren’t, and you found someone to do what he couldn’t do, someone to love you like you deserved.

He didn’t know a lot about them. You looked happier and that was all he cared about. He thought that seeing you with another person would calm his heart and his desires, but they only got worse, there was no way of forgetting about you. You were everywhere.

‘C’mon Levi, do something.’

‘Didn’t I tell you to drop it, Hange?’

His visits stopped but you kept waiting for him, hoping he would come to his senses. You didn’t get it, you really didn’t. He had the opportunity, he could have taken the chance to be with you, but he didn’t, so you moved on, or tried to, you didn’t love your partner, but you could see yourself falling in love with them. However, you still missed Levi, not as a potential lover, but as a friend. The way he erased you from his life as you were nothing broke your heart. What did he want from you?

He wanted everything. He wanted all of you and yet he couldn’t do anything about it. He was just frozen in time while you kept moving. He met your partner, they came to visit you once, they were gentle and loving, they looked at you like you were the brightest star in the firmament. They held your hand and kissed your lips. They did all the things he wanted to do. He was jealous, but he didn’t have the right to say something, he had never had the right.

The way he looked at you made you feel guilty, like you were betraying him, and you were so confused and annoyed and angry and mad, and you really wanted to punch him in the face. So, you went to his room that night and stormed in.

‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’

‘I should be asking that, I’m not the one barging in someone else’s room with no previous invitation.’

He had never seen you like that, so mad and full of rage and it was all directed to him and he knew it was his fault.

‘What do you want of me, Levi?’

He wanted everything.

He wanted you.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. Could you please stop making me lose my time?’

He saw it in your face, that was the last straw.

‘You’re selfish, an asshole, a prick and a lot of other things. But above it all, you’re a fucking coward, so much for Humanity’s Strongest. For fucks sake, Levi, I loved you, I still do, but I can’t keep waiting for someone who is too scared to do something about it. I want you and you want me too. What’s stopping you?’

He remembered again, the question he never had the chance to ask: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

You loved him and you weren’t scared of it. But he was, and you were about to leave the room. You turned your back on him and it was now or never. He had to choose: would he let you walk away definitely of his life or would he do something?

For once, he didn’t think, he didn’t listen to his head, he listened to his heart. For so long he made himself believe that he didn’t have a heart, but his heart was right there, beating for you.

He kissed you and you kissed him back.

‘Mine.’

‘Yours.’

5. EROS or Passionate love

You both were private people, you didn’t want people talking about your relationship during its first stages, what you had was precious and new and you wanted to protect it from the world a little longer. That’s why no one really knew about the whole ordeal, well, they knew that something had shifted because you could be in the same room without making everyone uncomfortable with your unsolved issues, but they couldn’t pinpoint what had exactly changed, they just guessed that you sorted everything out, finally.

However, Hange did know what changed. She prided herself on knowing Levi, after many years working with him she had learned that Levi only talked through his body language, so she started paying attention to what his body said instead of listening to the words he spewed. Therefore, when she asked him if he was dating you and he said a short no, he knew he was lying. She noticed how he seemed more at ease, how you had broken up with your partner, the way he would gravitate towards you and that when he looked at you, his eyes weren’t filled with longing and remorse, they were shinier and less cold than usual. So, she obviously knew that something was up, but she kept quiet. She may talk way too much, and people could find her annoying, but at the end of the day she was a good friend, and she would respect that neither of you wanted to make things public.

Keeping things private was harder than he originally thought, he was distant and cold to everyone, but he couldn’t be cold and distant with you when you made him burn inside and he could only think about holding you close. It was weird for him, he had spent so many years deprived of touch that he couldn’t imagine himself getting addicted to it, but he was wrong, so wrong.

You knew that Levi was touch starved, you didn’t need to be a genius to notice. When you picked up his body language and started hearing about his childhood, everything came together: his mother died when he was very young, the most paternal figure he had was toxic and abusive to him and since Isabel and Farlan he didn’t let anyone in easily. Levi wasn’t used to someone doting him and you knew that if you started showering him with affection, it would probably scare him off a little, and that was the last thing you wanted. So, you started slowly: holding hands, gentle caresses, kisses in his cheek, hugs, light pecks on the lips and when you saw that he started getting more comfortable, things started scaling on their own, you let him mark the pace. It wasn’t a quick process, but it was worth it.

After a few months, Levi couldn’t keep his hands of you and he surely didn’t want you to keep your hands off him. This was a new kind of love, at first, on the early stages of your relationship it was playful, but then it evolved into something more passionate: quick pecks turned into open mouthed kisses; holding hands innocently turned into holding you close while you came undone under him again and again; kisses now went lower and lower, exploring new parts of you that he hadn’t seen and that no one else would. He didn’t think that touch could mean so much to him, but it did now, and he knew that couldn’t ever go back to a touchless life where you wouldn’t be there to love him.

6. PHILAUTIA or Self-love

He wasn’t neither deaf, blind or stupid. He could hear what people had to say about your relationship, how you deserved better than him; he could see his reflection on the mirror and how he wasn’t beautiful, at least not as much as you, he wasn’t the male that would make people swoon and he knew that you could have any man or female you wanted, but you chose him, out of every other person, you decided to be with him. He was a lucky bastard and you didn’t make good decisions, what a match.

You would look at him like he held the stars in the sky, and you would touch him like he was about to disappear in any moment, as if he were a dream you were afraid to wake up from. He didn’t get why him, he wasn’t the most handsome, nor the nicest, nor the easiest to love, and you still decided to keep him around. He liked to think that he was smart or cleverer than the average, and yet he couldn’t grasp his head around that the fact you loved him and just him, and that was it, it was as simple as that.

Whenever you heard the things people said about your partner, you went feral, because you knew all those comments fueled the self-hate Levi had. Being loveless for so long it obviously affected the perception he had of himself and you wanted to change that, because he deserved it, he deserved all the happiness in this dull world. He liked to play strong, but you saw through him, and even though he never acted upon them, it hurt him. You wished he could see himself through you eyes, because it caused you pain the mere idea of him thinking less of himself, that he wasn’t worthy of your love.

You would tell him every day how much you loved him, as if you were reciting a prayer to your own god.

‘I love you.’

‘You’re beautiful.’

‘I could stare at you for the rest of my life.’

‘I don’t know what I would do without you.’

You would tell him that he needed to love himself, see the good inside of him, he guessed that that was one the types of love he had yet to discover: self-love. He didn’t see himself capable of loving himself nearly the half of how much you loved him.

‘You know one reason why you should love yourself, because you make me the happiest I’ve ever been.’

He didn’t love himself, not yet, but if he was able to make you smile like that, he couldn’t be that unworthy of you.

7. STORGE or Familiar love

He had been avoiding love for as long as he could remember, and then you burst into his life with the force of a typhoon. Love had found him, and he couldn’t get away, you never can, it was a lesson that he had finally accepted.

For so long he saw love as something unnecessary, a burden for the soul. Love ruins you, it stabs you on the back, whenever he let his walls down, love would always take advantage of it and destroy him, bringing him closer to insanity, he had lost himself too many times by loving people and when he met you, he did not want the cycle to repeat itself. He didn’t want more Kuchels, Kennys, Isabels and Farlans, love was merciless, and he wasn’t interested in it, at least that was what he told to himself every day, that he was better off alone. Was all the pain worth it? He thought love came with a high price and he couldn’t afford it. However, things change, life happens, destiny has always something in the store, well, in his case he had someone.

You were his everything, the beacon that brought light in his life, for so long he had been lost, walking amongst shadows, nearly becoming one, and when you appeared you changed the rules of the game, of his game. Every wall he had built around himself came down and you filled every gap his heart was missing. It was the scariest thing he had ever done, letting you in, letting someone in, giving someone else the control of his own heart. You knew the power you held between your hands and you never abused it. You were his solace in this mad world, the oasis in the middle of the desert.

Loving him was not easy, he knew it, he was rude, sharp, too closed off, mean, he was what people liked to call a ‘fucking jerk’ and yet you never gave up on him, on what you had. Instead of leaving when you had the chance, you stayed through thick and thin: through sleepless nights, through his bad moods and grumpiness, through his biting remarks… .You didn’t ran way, you were too stubborn for that, instead you taught him more forms of love.

You were all of the ones he knew and more.

You were selfless, giving him every part of you and loving him with everything you had to offer.

You were his best friend, his companion, the better half of him.

You were playful, joyous, probably the only thing that could make him smile and bring him happiness.

You were consuming, like a fire burning inside of him.

You were passionate, intoxicating.

You were every form of love he had ever experienced, but nothing could have ever prepared him for the kind of love he was experiencing in that moment: the familiar one. The one you feel when you hold your newborn in your trembling hands. It was something he couldn’t describe, there weren’t words for it, he tried to, but he failed every single time.

This was the way his mom loved him, and then he knew how much he had meant for his own mother. While holding little Kuchel on his arms, he remembered all those days and nights on that dirty brothel, all the hours he spent by his mother’s side, how she would do everything to give him the best life and he soon realized there was nothing in this world he wouldn’t do for his daughter. It wasn’t the best of times to have a child, but in that moment, in that precise instant, when Kuchel opened her grey eyes, he was sure of one thing: he would tear everything and everyone down only to see her smile.

A knock on the door. Another one. Two minutes passed and then Hange, followed by Erwin, entered in the room.

‘Tch, Shitty-glasses, who gave you permission to come in?’

‘My authority as a god-mother.’

‘Don’t make me regret it.’

‘She’s beautiful, what’s her name?’

‘Her name is Kuchel.’

Kuchel was his new world, he loved her so much that it was overwhelming, he would never love someone as much as he loved her, and no one would probably love with the same devotion Levi Ackerman loved his daughter.

‘You know, Kuchel, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I promise you that you will have the best life a man like me can give you. I may be a little cold, perhaps a little strict and you will probably get mad at me sometimes, but no matter what happens, I will love you through everything. And by the way, no dating until I’m dead because no brat will be good enough for you. You deserve the world Kuchel and I’ll give you everything it has to offer. Things may get hard, you aren’t born in the best circumstances, but I’ll protect you because you deserve the life I couldn’t live.’

Kuchel’s first word was ‘dadda’.

Kuchel’s first steps were pointed towards his father.

Kuchel’s favorite pastime was being in his father’s arms.

Kuchel could only sleep after his father had kissed her forehead.

And Kuchel would never love someone as much as he loved his father, because she loved him as much as he loved her.

8. PRAGMA or Enduring love

He was old and wrinkly, he was scarred, mutilated and there were days he couldn’t sleep because the nightmares were too real. But he was happy, he was married to the most beautiful and special person he had ever met, he had a loving daughter, a bunch of brats he was proud to call grandchildren and the tea shop he had always dreamed about.

Life hadn’t been fair to him. He had lost so many people he cared about, he had fought a war and he had had the weight of the world on his shoulders. But, after all, after the tortures, the adversities, the deaths… He had people who loved and whom he loved.

Love was worth it. He had finally learned that.

At his seventies he found out about the last kind of love, the enduring, the one that lasts and survives in time. He loved his family above everything, and he would love them long after his bones turn into ashes and no one remembers his name.

Then he recalled that question he never got to ask his mother: ‘if you died, do you think anyone would ever love me, mom?’

He looked at the sky and smiled.

‘After all someone was fool enough to love me mom, who would have thought?’

A gentle breeze caressed his skin and a single tear fell from his eye.

‘I guess that’s the way you have of answering the question.’

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