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libraryofgage · 1 year ago

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Good Vibrations Part One

Hello, it's me, back at it again with another Steddie AU.

Anyway, if I were tagging this AU, these would be the most important ones: Deaf Steve Harrington; Tooth-rotting Fluff; Getting Together

If you wanna be tagged in future parts, just let me know!

As always, if you see any typos, no you didn't ;)

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Steve has blown through three pairs of hearing aids in the past year. The first pair had lasted a few years and needed replacement because of normal wear and tear. The second pair was sacrificed during that fight with Jonathan. He hadn't been wearing them, but they'd been in Steve's pocket, and he'd landed at just the right angle to feel them shatter. The third pair was taken by the Russians because, despite Robin's shouting and cursing at them for being dumbasses (and this was before she actually knew what they were for), they accused him of recording their kidnapping and torture.

Honestly, he wouldn't recommend fighting Russians and Billy and Mind Flayers and driving while nearly totally deaf.

The funniest part of it all, though, is that Steve doesn't even use hearing aids regularly. He normally only wears them at home. The pair lost to Jonathan were present because, well, that whole day had been a lot for Steve, and he needed the comfort of knowing he could stop reading lips the moment it became too exhausting for him. The pair lost to the Russians was because he'd been getting ready to tell Robin about being deaf. She'd already clocked the weird things he does (well, weird to her, normal to Steve), and he figured letting her in on the big secret would bring them a little closer.

Of course, that didn't go the way he expected. Robin thought he was confessing love and decided to beat him to the punch. That's how he learned Robin is a lesbian, and Steve couldn't let her be the only one admitting to something like that, so he told her about being bi and his long-standing, hopeless crush. And being deaf. But the bi with a crush thing seemed more important in the moment. She took it in stride, it brought them closer, and then Robin asked if Steve could teach her sign language.

Which meant that Steve had to learn sign language because he never had. Between not wanting to feel even more different than he already did and trying to convince his parents that, really, everything was fine and he didn't need to go to a special school for deaf and hard-of-hearing kids, he'd never learned. Learning it had somehow felt like an admission of weakness, and that was the last thing he wanted. But he learned for Robin, and they stumbled through sign language together, creating new signs only they knew.

But that's all in the past now, and Steve is working his ass off at Family Video to afford a new pair because he refuses to ask his parents for money. If he asks them, they'll come back, and that's the last thing he wants. They don't need to have all their worries confirmed that Steve is helpless, and he doesn't want them anywhere near Hawkins "Hellscape" Indiana.

So. Working his ass off, taking extra shifts, and babysitting the kids as much as he can to make up for the whole Friends and Family Discount he gives their parents. He's exhausted, but he gets to recharge somewhat during his lunch break.

About a ten-minute walk from the Family Video is a record store, which Steve has started visiting daily to just breathe. The lone worker in the store is usually too busy listening to her own music to pay Steve any attention, letting him wander and try to determine which records will best serve him.

Steve drifts over to the rock and heavy metal section, hoping to find a new album but unsurprised when he doesn't. He browses through them anyway, moving past Metallica and Black Sabbath and Iron Maiden. He already has all of these albums on his shelf at home. He has the cassette tapes for them, too.

But he really wants something new. He likes the novelty of experiencing unfamiliar vibrations through the speaker, letting them thrum through his fingertips and into his bones. It's fun and relaxing, and after all the bullshit he's been through lately, he probably deserves something relaxing.

After glancing over a few more familiar albums, Steve sighs and glances at the counter by the door. The lone worker is standing there, headphones over her ears, and idly flipping through a magazine. She's chewing gum, and Steve braces himself for the sheer hell of trying to read her lips without making it obvious he's reading her lips while she's got something in her mouth to disrupt the normal shape of words and sounds.

But he has to try. Steve takes one more deep breath before walking over, shoving his hands into his pockets when he comes to a stop at the counter. The girl raises a hand, motioning for him to wait, so he stays quiet as she finishes reading her page. She flips to the next one before looking up, not making any move to pull her headphones off.

"Hi. Do you have any new rock or metal albums coming in soon," Steve asks, feeling the vibrations of speech in his throat and hoping his words aren't too loud.

They don't seem to be. The girl doesn't flinch or pull back. She just looks him up and down, taking in the polo shirt and the nice khakis and the Family Video vest he forgot to take off before leaving. Finally, her neck and shoulders jerk slightly, and Steve knows she's huffed in annoyance. "No," she says, the word clear enough in the shape of her lips for Steve to know it immediately.

He frowns slightly, his fingernails digging into his palms. Steve wouldn't mind just leaving now, but something keeps him there. He just...he really wants new music. He needs something new. "Are there gonna be any shows nearby?" he asks.

The girl rolls her eyes and says something, her mouth distorted by gum-chewing. Steve can barely make out the words "you" and "check" from her response. Thankfully, it's accompanied by a vague gesture at something behind him. Steve looks over his shoulder to see a bulletin board with flyers plastered across it.

"Right. Thanks," he says, nodding to her before walking over. The flyers are all different colors with various fonts that scream for Steve's attention. Some of them are for bands, some are advertisements of garage sales or instruments in need of a new home, and others are just business flyers from stores nearby.

He's seen the bulletin board before, but he's never actually paid attention to it. Steve has always been laser-focused on browsing the records. But now, Steve carefully reviews each flyer advertising shows. Some are for comedy shows, which he immediately dismisses. One seems promising, but then he sees how far it is, and Steve definitely can't do an overnight trip like that.

Finally, Steve sees a flyer advertising a show at the Hideout later that week. It's close enough that he won't be out overnight. The place is kind of seedy, but Steve figures he can find some corner near the stage to hide. Or he can bring Robin and let her help him navigate any potential social situations. He tugs the flyer off the board, gaze lingering on the "Corroded Coffin" emblazoned across the top.

He knows the band. Of course, he knows the band. He's extremely familiar with their singer. From a distance. Honestly, Eddie Munson probably doesn't have the best impression of him, but Steve's heart never really cared about that. Because Eddie is like everything Steve wants to be: he's loud and unafraid of being so, he doesn't care about his image and how others perceive him, and he looks like his laugh sounds beautiful. Steve wouldn't know if he's actually right about that last point, but Eddie throws his head back when he laughs, eyes crinkled and hand over his stomach like his muscles ache.

His mouth suddenly feels dry, but he's also filled with unprecedented courage. Steve has graduated (barely), and that means a significantly lower chance of running into Eddie during the day if watching the show somehow goes wrong.

Steve folds the flyer into quarters and stuffs it into his back pocket. He'll be overly aware of it being there until Robin starts her shift and he can show it to her, but that's okay. He throws a quick thanks over his shoulder as he leaves the shop, glancing up at the bell he can't hear that signals the door's opening. He vaguely remembers what bells are supposed to sound like (he'd heard a few before losing the ability to hear them), but he doesn't let himself dwell on it.

Instead, he focuses on the trip back to Family Video, keeping an eye on the road to watch for any cars he wouldn't notice otherwise.

----

When the final bell rings, Eddie Munson can't get out of class fast enough. He'd been packed for the last five minutes, and he slid out of his seat the moment that first peal rang out. He has a gig to prepare for, and every second counts. At least, each second counts until he notices something (or someone) that could prove entertaining for a while.

He spots Dustin alone near one of the exits, and Eddie decides to relieve the kid of his isolation. He waits until he's behind Dustin to shout, "Henderson!" and throw his arm over the kid's shoulders, ignoring the way he jumps like he'd been expecting an attack.

"Holy shit!" Dustin shrieks, jerking back to look up at Eddie. "Don't do that, man, you're gonna give me a heart attack."

Eddie snorts, waving away Dustin's concern as he continues toward the exit. The general flow of students trying to get out helps him along, and Dustin doesn't seem to realize they're actually moving until they've gotten into direct sunlight. "You're fine," Eddie says, "Anyway, whatcha doing all alone, Henderson? Lose your way?"

"No, I have...stuff to do today," Dustin says, shrugging as he blinks to acclimate to the sunlight.

Oh, yeah, way too cryptic for Eddie to not dig for more. "Stuff? What kinda stuff? Got a hot date? Going shopping with your mom?" he asks, and then he gasps dramatically and moves to stand in Dustin's way. He puts both hands on his shoulders and very seriously says, "Be honest, Henderson, you're seeing another DM, aren't you?"

Dustin stares at him for a few seconds before rolling his eyes and shrugging his hands off. "Who else in this town DMs?" he asks, "Other than Will, I guess, but he's still working on a campaign."

"Fair," Eddie concedes, "so, whatcha really doing?"

After a few seconds of getting nudged by the students around them, Dustin sighs and says, "I have chores, okay? But that doesn't sound cool to say, does it?"

Fair. Eddie nods in agreement and moves out of Dustin's way, continuing to follow him. "So, what, your mom picking you up today?" he asks.

"No, Steve."

"Oh, the famous Steve."

Dustin nods, looking over the parking lot before pointing to one end. "Yeah, he's awesome," Dustin says as Eddie follows the direction of his finger.

And standing there, leaning against the hood of his car and looking to the side where a group of trees is swaying in the breeze, is Steve Harrington. Steve "The Hair" Harrington. King Steve. The worst thing, Eddie thinks, is that Steve looks good. His hair is still perfect, of course, and his stupid little striped shirt is pulling against his biceps and riding up just enough for Eddie to see a tiny sliver of tanned skin above his jeans. He looks a little tense, but Eddie chalks that up to him being back on the campus after already graduating.

"Harrington? You've been talking about Steve Harrington this whole time?" Eddie asks, his voice a little strained, "How the fuck do you know Steve Harrington?"

"He's my babysitter," Dustin says, his voice implying that much should have been obvious, but Eddie wants to grab his shoulders and shake until his head rolls off.

Steve Harrington doesn't babysit. He doesn't know nerds that talk about D&D. He doesn't drive nerds around. At least, he never did in high school. Granted, Eddie never actually talked to Steve, but everybody knew that Steve Harrington was too cool for, well, anything that wasn't the typical jock and popular guy shit.

As he's thinking about the last time he saw Steve Harrington (in the halls, while the guy had bruises and looked worse for wear), they get within shouting distance. And Eddie has zero impulse control when Wayne isn't around, so he doesn't think before shouting, "Hey, Harrington!"

Next to him, Dustin whips his head to glare at Eddie. And Steve Harrington doesn't fucking react. He just keeps staring at that group of trees like it's the most fascinating thing in the world. "Dude," Dustin says, grabbing Eddie's arm and yanking harshly, "don't shout like that."

Eddie frowns, anger beginning to simmer in his stomach at the complete lack of acknowledgment. "Why are you upset with me?" he asks, gesturing at Steve as he continues, "I'm not the one being a douchebag here."

Dustin opens his mouth, about to say something, only to snap it shut once more. He frowns like he's just realized he can't say something, and huffs with frustration. "Just...just don't do that," he finally says, keeping a hand on Eddie's arm and dragging him across the parking lot. And, yeah, something is definitely weird here.

Instead of just walking up to Steve, they make a large arch until they're within Steve's line of sight.

Eddie watches as Steve notices them, seeing Dustin first and pushing off the car. He relaxes for a split second until he sees Eddie and his shoulders tense again.

Great.

Once they're close enough for Eddie to count the moles above the collar of Steve's shirt, Dustin grins and says, "Hey, Steve." But it's odd, because Eddie has never heard Dustin talk this slow or this carefully, like he's doing his best to enunciate his words.

Steve flashes a grin and ruffles Dustin's hair. "Hey, twerp, you're late," he says. He then glances at Eddie, his grin becoming a little smaller, and says, "Hey, Munson."

Wait. Steve Harrington knows Eddie's name? And he called him by it? He said Munson, not Freak. Eddie stares at Steve for a few seconds before nodding. "Harrington," he says, "how the fuck did you become a babysitter?"

Is he just imagining things, or is Steve looking at his mouth? Like, really intensely. He's definitely not, because Steve looks up after a few seconds with a raised eyebrow. "I needed some extra cash. Also, don't swear around Dustin. I'm the one who gets in trouble when he curses in front of his mom."

Something about the words makes Eddie grin. Never in a million years would he have guessed that he'd be talking to Steve Harrington. And he would have laughed you into Mordor itself if you suggested their conversation would be about Dustin Henderson swearing in front of his mother. "What's his mom do when he swears?" he asks.

Because he can feel the conversation veering into something potentially embarrassing for him, Dustin lets go of Eddie and starts pushing Steve toward the driver's side of his car. "Okay, we gotta go. So many chores, so little time," he says, his voice back to that normal speed and enunciation.

Steve frowns slightly, looking down at Dustin and tilting his head just slightly. "What?" he asks. Instead of actually answering, Dustin just makes some vague gesture with his hand and looks at the car. "Oh, right. Go ahead and get in the car. And, uh, see you later, Munson."

"Is that a promise?" Eddie asks before he can think better of it.

Steve pauses, looking at Eddie's mouth with a slight scrunch to his nose. He seems to be considering something as Dustin scrambles into the passenger seat, watching them with narrowed eyes. Honestly, Eddie is surprised he's not blasting the horn to hurry Steve up. Finally, Steve comes to a decision and meets Eddie's eyes again. "Your band has a show tonight, right? At the Hideout? I was planning to go. So, yeah, I'll see you then, I guess."

And with that, like he hasn't just fucking rocked Eddie's world, Steve Harrington gets into his car. He makes sure Dustin is buckled before waving at Eddie and pulling out of the parking spot.

Eddie finds himself waving back, staring dumbly at the car as it pulls onto the street. It only hits him a few seconds later that Steve Harrington is coming to his show. At the Hideout. His metal show. A Corroded Coffin gig at the Hideout.

Holy. Shit.

#steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #deaf steve harrington #Good Vibrations Steddie #that's the tag for this one lmao #it's all fluff i swear #I hope you guys have as much fun reading it that I have writing it!

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mockerycrow · 1 year ago

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Emergency Contact (1/2) (Ghost x GN!Reader)

>> emergency contact concept here << PART TWO HERE!!

Summary: Simon is your roommate, and you haven’t seen each other in months, considering Simon’s job. An unfamiliar number pops up on Simon’s phone, and answering it makes his world turn upside down.

A/N: How you two moved in together is very vaguely inspired this ghost fic right here. please give it a read! If you finish the song above, I highly recommend listening to the entire album while reading. i’m not the happiest with this, but i’m happy enough to post!

[WARNINGS: Blood and injury, traumatic events/trauma brought up, gore, little comfort, medical inaccuracies, tbh ooc simon but it’s ok.]

Eight months, thirteen days, and nine hours. That’s how long it’s been since he’s been home, since he’s seen you. That’s how long he’s been stuck on base, or thrown into a foreign country to complete some mission, or to gather some intel, or to kill someone, just somewhere, anywhere but with you.

Eight months, thirteen days, and nine hours. That’s how long it’s been since you softly asked him to stay as safe as he can, and to come back alive, and to come back with at least eight fingers. It was a running joke between you two, a way to relieve the terrifying reality of his job; as long as Simon came home alive and with majority of his fingers, he could consider it a job well done. You didn’t know much of his job, of course—only that he’s military, and he’s gone a lot. You already guessed it was a lot of classified stuff, probably down top secret government type of things. That did make you scared, though. You didn’t want the day to come, the day where people in fancy uniforms show up at your doorstep like you’re some widow. The thought of someone informing you of Simon’s death makes your stomach twist.

Eight months is admittedly a long time. Simon.. he missed you, but he’s rather die that verbally admit it, but he sure as hell felt it. He missed the way he could hear you walk through the house, the weight of the floorboards creaking up your feet. Simon missed walking by the bathroom and the air vaguely smelled your shampoo and body wash, a clear indicator you had just taken a shower. Simon missed the way you carelessly have your shoes next to the shoe rack, not even on it, and despite his annoyance of your laziness? He misses it every single time he’s away. He never really realizes the difference of living on base versus being home with you, and he’s comfortable in both environments for completely different reasons. Simon is comfortable with you because you’re safe, you aren’t associated with anyone he has to deal with on a near daily basis. You don’t scan the kitchen to see which household items could be potential bombs in the vicinity like he does. On base, Simon finds comfort in the familiarity of being constantly on alert, the need for a gun to be against his hip—it’s not the best, considering he’s in fight mode majority of the time, but it’s comforting. It’s familiar. It’s.. home, in a way.

You and Simon call at least once every three weeks—it’s not more because you’re both busy, you have your life to tend to while he has to do something like protecting an American Embassy, or sneaking into a compound to retrieve some vital information. You two talk about all kinds of things; you complain about the neighbors for the nth time, or you talk about your job, just something that he hasn’t heard about in a while. Simon.. he’s limited on what he can talk about—what he wants to talk about. It’s a bit difficult, keeping details of his job hidden away from you. He also keeps you hidden away from them; his team. Price vaguely is aware of your existence, but all he knows is your name and your phone number—someone to alert when he eventually would pass away.

It surprised Price when he requested access to his own file to make a change. Simon went for years without anyone in that section, leaving it blank—and then suddenly ‘[Name] [Last Name]’ is written down, along with your phone number. Simon doesn’t want to die somewhere and then you sit at home, dreading the fact that you haven’t received a call from him for over six months. Other than that, no one is aware of your existence and he wants to keep it that way. It keeps you safe, and he doesn’t want the one thing he has going in his life to be taken away from him—not like everything else has been.

No, you and Simon aren’t together. You just are the one constant he cannot allow to die. How you and Simon became close was rather funny, really—before you were roommates, you bumped into each other at the local stores, the bank, even several public spaces like parks and such. You didn’t see him too often and you weren’t aware on why, but you didn’t really wonder why either. By this point, you knew each other for a couple of months. He introduced himself as SR—not Ghost or Simon, but as SR. You didn’t bother to question it because this tall, bulky man seemed like he was trying keep himself as anonymous as possible. Without fail, you always saw him wear dark colored clothing that hid any identifiable markings—tattoos and scars, that kind of thing. He usually has his hood up with a black face mask covering his nose down, but you do know one thing—he has to have bright blonde hair. Why else would his beautiful eyelashes and eyebrows be that bright? It would catch your eye every time you’d see them. Sometimes you would see him with a beanie on and the mask, with his hood down. This wasn’t too often, as it exposed some scarring he has on the back of his neck, as well as his forehead. This also silently lead you to believe he has a tough past of some sort, which is confirmed when you run into him somewhere you never expected to—your therapist’s building. You bumped into him right outside, and you apologized profusely before looking and going silent as you made eye contact.

A silent agreement was made between you two that day, one that you could never put into words. Something in that moment that dragged you two closer together. You had been through some shit in your life, shit that had permanent effect on you, shit that you wanted to work through. It was horribly tiring, but you knew you needed to work through it—so you could live a life you felt was worth living. Simon, was on the other side of the spectrum. He didn’t want this. He never wanted to tell anyone about anything, but Price, Price fucking made him. Simon spends his days and nights plagued with nightmares and memories—he’s woken up in the middle of the night enough times to know that he needs help, but he was so adamant about not talking to anyone about it. But seeing you there? Someone who he hasn’t known for long, someone who had always greeted him with a smile on your face, laughter spilling from your beautiful vocal cords, and someone who doesn’t touch him without permission? It made him so angry and hopeless about this world. Not even you, a stranger who he sees as the best human being he’s known in a while—despite not knowing you for long—could escape from the cruel and sharp jaws of the world. You found out you two accidentally scheduled the same days, so it became an unspoken agreement to wait for the other outside of the building so you can both go in. Even when you weren’t sure when his next appointment would be, you’d be right outside of that building, waiting for him. You would always be right there, and that’s something he quickly learned.

You lost your house to a fire, everything went with the burning embers that raged inside of the 4 walls of your previous home, the structure collapsing in on itself. You had gotten out in time, and you numbly watched the fire roar, the crackling burning it’s memory in your ears. The piercing sound of different sirens were approaching, but all you could do is stand there with your phone in your hand, watching the home you worked so hard for burn to the foundation built years ago. You felt a hand on your shoulder, but you didn’t bother to turn to see who it was. Everything was going so slow, almost like a movie scene in the worst way possible. Your nostrils burned from the smell of burning wood, drywall, and installation. The hand squeezed your shoulder and you slowly looked at who it was—and was him. Simon. His eyebrows were furrowed, eyes ever so slightly panicked and it was obvious he was asking you something, but you didn’t hear him. All you could focus on was that he was here. You blinked rapidly as your eyes began to burn from the smoke and from that choked feeling going from your chest to your throat. “I..” You croak ever so slightly. You couldn’t hold it back—you quickly grabbed onto Simon desperately, letting out a heart-wrenching sob because you just lost everything you owned, every memory, every piece of furniture, everything.. but he was here. He was the only thing was wasn’t crumbling away from your grasp, the only constant. Once you clung to him, Simon’s senses were flooded with you. Fuck, your touch burned, just like everyone’s else’s but he liked—no, loved how it felt. Despite the image of a burning house in his wake making dread bubble in his gut, your sobs and touch were the only thing he could focus on. Simon hesitates for only a second before pulling you into his personal space, his arms wrapping around you and weighing heavily on your body. Neither of you spoke, he just let you scream into his chest and sob, your fists gently banging against his chest—the anger, the sadness, everything was too much. Simon knew exactly how you were feeling, so he didn’t mind the twinges of pain your hands produced. Simon was the one who helped you while you chatted with the paramedics and the police. He was the one who helped you find your words when you had none left to share, the smell of the smoke imprinted on your clothes.

Without question, Simon took you to his house. He did not have another bed set up, so he had you sleep in his room while he slept on his couch. He hated the hollow look your eyes held, the way you were delayed with your answers, the ways your hands shook. Your everlasting smile had dissipated into a wobbly frown and he.. Simon couldn’t handle it. He grabbed you some of his clothes and helped you into his bathroom, quietly telling you to take a shower. He’ll take care of your clothes. Simon left you alone, and you showered for a long time. He didn’t count, but it was over an hour and a half. Simon didn’t say anything about you possibly racking up his bill, how could he when you had just lost everything? He wanted to.. to help you, and he wasn’t sure why. Even when he found himself scrubbing your smoke and tar covered clothes in his kitchen sink, he couldn’t find an exact reason why he wanted to help you. Maybe it’s because you made him feel human when he needed to be, maybe you were the one thing that kept him coming back to this town, the one thing that kept him from completely pulling away from the civilian world. You had found him in a corner like a dog, lips curled back and snarling—sharp teeth clashing together, and without a word, you gave him reasons to trust you. Although they may not be.. normal reasons to the regular eye, but they were enough for Simon.

You’re enough for Simon. He scrubbed your clothes until his arms burned, and then some.

That’s when he found out that you too, were also someone who could not stay asleep for long. When Simon awoke with his adrenaline pumping from the muffled sound of vomiting, he had to calm himself down because he’s safe, and you’re safe, most of all. Simon isn’t sure when he began to think that way, but it’s one of the many things he’s decided to not question—which also new for him. Simon is man who demands answers, yet with you? it’s like everything naturally falls into place, which is why he doesn’t complain when your stay at his house—which you swore would only be until you gathered enough money for an apartment—turned from a two week stay, to Simon carrying in an IKEA bed frame to put and assemble in one of his empty rooms. Many sleepless nights came and went, and each and every one you spent them with each other, sitting by a windowsill together, other times spending it in the backyard and looking at the sky. Sometimes you would wake up first, sometimes it would be him. You somehow always knew when he had woken up from a nightmare, his heart pounding in his ears—until your hands grab his and squeeze, to ground him. You burn him, and he welcomes the tickle of your ever-glowing flame. A year into this arrangement, Simon finally shows you his face and he appreciates that you don’t look at him any different. He usually hates the searching eyes, trying to memorize every inch of his face—but he’s greedy when you do it. When your eyes roam over every scar and acne scar, when you point out his messily cut hair and half-assed shaven stubble, he doesnt get angry. Simon doesn’t feel suffocated by your glances. He doesn’t wear his mask at home anymore, not when you’re there.

Then Simon gets the notice about his three month leave ending soon; and he knows that you need to know about his job. Or at least, the bare minimum you need to know. In reality, it’s how much he wants you to know, but he doesn’t want to admit that. He sits you down one morning, a cup of tea in his hand and he had a mug of your favorite morning drink on the other side of the table he had bought a few weeks you started staying here. Simon explains that he has a job in the military, that he can’t tell you much, but it means he’s going to be gone for weeks, even months at a time. You’re at a loss at first, because who is going to have an extremely positive reaction to “by the way, I work an extremely dangerous job and I can’t tell you anything and I’ll be gone for a while.. Oh yeah, you likely won’t know if I die!”? Despite your initial reaction, you grow to be okay with this situation. Or, we’ll, as okay as you can be with it. You also find out that he was here for way longer than he originally is, due to his boss demanding him to take a break—AKA, “go to therapy you dafty”.

For a little over two years, you two fell into a good rhythm. A call every three weeks, him coming home and you becoming the safest space he’s ever had in his life.

Which is why when his personal cell phone begins to vibrate in his pocket during some fuck-all meeting, his eyebrows furrow. The number is unfamiliar, but the area code is not. Simon quietly excuses himself from the extended round table, taking his call outside of the meeting room. Price’s eyes follow his figure as he exits, noticing it’s his personal cell phone in his hand. Simon answers the call and presses his phone against his masked ear, muttering a low, “Hello?”

A high-pitched, soft yet serious voice filters through the speaker, a woman. “Hi, is this Mr. Riley?”

Simon pauses, and so does his heart. “Who’s asking?”

He honestly regrets asking that in the moment—one part of him genuinely wishes he never answered this call, and the other part of him is glad he did. “I’m a nurse from Northern Manchester Community Hospital, you’re written down as [Name]’s emergency contact. They’ve been a victim of a hit and run situation, sir. They’re alive, but they’re in the ICU.” The nausea that suddenly bubbles inside of his guys, the stomach acid mixed with whatever he had eaten previously, threatening to travel up his esophagus, burn every inch and then exit with a horrific sound. Simon’s head began to spin—he’s your emergency contact? A hit and run, you were fucking hit?? By what, a car? A pick-up? A semi? God, Simon has seen the most horrible, gruesome, fucked up shit you would ever see in his entire life, yet he isn’t sure if he can handle the image of you spread out in a hospital bed, with one too many tubes circulating around you. His mind plagues him with intrusive images, ones he never wants to actually see played out. Fuck, his head hurts. It feels like someone is physically shoving a knife into his chest and twisting it, like God is laughing at him and playing with Simon’s pain for his own gain. How could he not think that, especially with everything that has happened to him? His friends, his family? His old CO? The fucking abuse he endured??

It’s like Simon lost his hearing for a moment, because he cannot bare fucking losing you, too. There’s a vague ringing in his ears, almost like there was an explosion and he stood too close. And then suddenly every sound comes rushing back to his eardrums, and everything suddenly everything is so fucking overwhelming. “Mr. Riley?” The nurse calls over the phone, her tone laced with worry. He clears his throat and when he speaks, he sounds wrecked, which he fucking hates. “I.. I’ll come as soon as I can.” Simon hangs up, not giving the nurse a moment to speak. He drops his phone and if he doesn’t sit down, he’s going to fall over like a tree that’s been cut down. Simon lets out a shaky breath, trying to ignore the way his stomach is screaming and twisting as he puts a hand on the wall, and he crouches down. It’s the first time he doesn’t look around to see if anyone is watching his sudden display of emotion. When he’s suddenly rocked with the feeling of home at work, especially with the news that you’re fucking injured—he’s overwhelmed and twisted all over the place. Simon finds himself stumbling back to his barracks.

Price finds his way to him after Simon never returns to the meeting. He knocks on the door, but his knuckles pause before they can knock against the door for the third time as he discovers the door is open—which is very, very, odd. He slowly opens the door while calling for Ghost, and is met with the sight of Simon shoving some of his clothes and belongings into a duffle bag, as well as his military travel documents. “Ghost?” Price questions, who stopped in his doorway to watch Simon lose his mind while packing. Simon doesn’t respond as he practically rips his phone charger out of the wall and stuffs it into the bag, zipping it up. He slings it over his shoulder and he turns around, pausing when he sees Price. Simon’s eyes tell everything he’s feeling—that something’s happened, something bad, and he needs to leave. Price bites his lip and quietly exhales, his fingers rubbing at his chin. “I’ll approve your leave. Just shoot me a text of how long it needs to be, yeah?”

Simon makes sure to note to send Price a thank you of some sort, because within the next two hours, Simon is boarding a plane, heading for Manchester, wearing some black clothing, a jacket, a black face mask, gloves, and his beanie. The entire time, he could not stop thinking about you—and how you could possibly die before he got there to send off his final goodbyes. Is that something he would actually want to do, though? See you in the hospital, knowing it’ll be the last place you’d ever be alive in? Go home, see how you left the house exactly as you left it? A house, but without his home in it? Simon stares out the airplane window blankly, his hands curled into fists, and his nails would be digging into his palms if he didn’t have gloves on.

He couldn’t lose you. Not like this.

The next part for Simon, it’s a blur again. Got off the plane, got his luggage, provided documentation, blah blah blah—he didn’t give a fuck about any of it. His focus was you. He didn’t bother to stop home to drop his stuff off, he took an Uber straight to the hospital from the airport. It was a fairly expensive Uber too, but he could worry about the costs of everything later. It took another half hour to get there.

His heart began to hammer in his chest as the sight of the hospital’s signs began to pop up on the road, the anxiety taking hold in his stomach and his head begins to hurt again. Simon quietly thanks the driver, tips them, and exits the car with a swiftness once they pull up. Simon walks through the main entrance’s sliding doors, going up to the desk. A woman behind the counter hangs up the phone, murmuring a goodbye, and then she looks at Simon with her pretty blue eyes. “How can I help you, sir?” She murmurs sweetly, noting how anxious he is. She can see the sweat on his brow line. Simon clears his throat, his voice rumbling in his chest when he speaks. It takes everything in him to not yell at this innocent woman and get thrown out. “My.. My name is Mr. Riley, I was called ‘cause my friend is here,” Simon manages to push out. “[Name] [Last Name].” The woman turns to her computer and clicks the couple of buttons and types a couple of words and holy fuck, Simon just wants to go to your wing already—“Ah, yes, I see you’re listed as their emergency contact,” The woman grabs a sticky note and writes with a pink pen your room number and elevator floor, handing it to Simon. He barely gets a “thank you” out before he nearly jogs to the nearby elevator. Fourth floor, room 283. Fourth floor, room 283. Fourth floor, room 283—it’s the longest minute long elevator ride in his entire fucking life.

Simon changes face masks whilst facing the wall, and then he finds your room number—and his heart is beating out of his chest. There’s cops standing outside of your room who stop him from entering. Simon’s anger flares up so quickly, he nearly makes a scene until a doctor exits your room. She’s wearing her usual blue scrubs, her coat, and she’s dawning a N95 and some sterile gloves. She’s holding a clipboard. “Mr. Riley?” She questions, holding the clipboard close to her chest. Simon nods without hesitation, and she responds, “I’m sorry, but due to the nature of this case, you’ll have to provide some identification for me and these officers.”

Usually, Simon would hesitate—he gives anyone outside of his team the bare minimum, hell, he only introduced himself as SR until he knew you for a while. This time, he takes out his military ID and shows it to the officers. He ignores their looks of surprise, and ignores the murmurs that come from them. Simon puts his ID away and he holds back the urge to shove them out of the way as he glares down at the doctor on accident. “Come in,” The doctor opens the sliding door and steps into the hospital ICU room with him. Simon follows behind her and he immediately smells the sickening smell only the ICU gives off. There’s a small wall blocking his view from you that he hasn’t past, and he can already hear the machines working. A heart monitor, a ventilator, combined with other machines he doesn’t know too well. The doctor flips through the papers pinned to her clipboard. “They were hit by a vehicle of some sort, the scene suggested they were walking home from the local corner store. [Name] has multiple broken bones and fractures, a punctured lung, a fractured jaw and internal bleeding. They lost a lot of blood at the scene.” Simon doesn’t respond as he slowly walks forward, and he finally lays his eyes on you. It’s.. traumatizing, to say the least. You were never supposed to be in a hospital bed like this, hooked up to machines he can’t even name. He slowly walks over to you, dropping his duffel bag somewhere on the floor. He doesn’t care to look where. Simon barely pays attention to what the doctor is saying—his hands tremble as he stands by your side, his heart thumping harshly in his chest. Fuck.

He drags over one of the chairs next to your bed. Simon takes off one of his gloves slowly, and then he tears the other one off in a frenzy. He feels so unlike himself, so.. different.. human. He reaches over to your hand and his fingers grab your wrist, so gentle as if you’re glass. Simon presses his fingers against your pulse point, counting your heartbeats despite the monitor. The thumping under your skin makes it more.. real. Feeling you, your heartbeat, your warmth and your skin—it’s comforting. Simon clears his throat and fights the urge to vomit once a gain, watching your chest rise and fall, produced by the ventilator.

He moves his hand to intertwine with your fingers and he uses his other hand to feel your pulse. Simon closes his eyes, muttering the beats per minute under his breath.

At least you’re alive—you’re here, you’re alive, and you’re with him. And that’s all he asks for.

tags;; @alwaystired--neversleeping @handsomeunderwear-art @indefenseofkara @kaysav608 @1-is-loneliest-number @rosee-sensuelle @kitty-satan1 @k4marina @rahmown @royalty-purple @bowtruckleninja — if you are not tagged, it’s not allowing me :-)

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sandwhitches · 5 months ago

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*ೃ༄ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐌 (𝐯𝐚𝐫. 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐤𝐲𝐮𝐮 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

✹ 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗰: drabbles of various hq characters as songs from charm by clairo

✹ 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: fluff!!

✹ 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘀: atsumu miya, osamu miya, rintaro suna, tooru oikawa, hajime iwaizumi & keiji akaashi

✹ 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: (under 16 dni) established relationship (all except suna’s), mentions of insecurity in osamu’s, smoking & drinking in akaashi’s, oikawa and iwaizumi’s may be slightly suggestive at some points but it’s a reach

✹ 𝗮/𝗻: if you’re like wow that lineup is so random it’s because these are all my most prized boyfriends i hope you can understand thanks. also been obsessed w charm lately erghghhh listening to the entire album is a part of my daily routine now!! songs are linked to the titles if u wanna give a listen while reading :) i highly recommend listening to the album if u haven’t already!! srry for any typos i missed!

𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐲𝐚 ✶ 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞

“and once you get in my ear, i see kismet sinking in, it’s second nature”

after all this time, you suppose that loving atsumu isn’t as complex as it seemed like it was before. you love him in the same fashion in which you breathe or blink, you’d forgotten how to function without it, it’s second nature. likewise, atsumu finds loving you to be the easiest thing in the world.

he knows you too well, it makes your heart flutter every time he does something, no matter how many times he’s done it before. every morning, you slip out of bed to find that your slippers are already waiting for you on the chilly wood of your bedroom floor, placed perfectly where your feet land when you roll out of bed. you’d almost forgotten it was sunday, and you would have had you not heard the sound of your husband in the kitchen doing a horrible job at being quiet.

you can picture it before you even see it, atsumu hunched over a skillet with sizzling bacon popping quietly to fill the early morning silence of your apartment. atsumu can never sleep in anymore, eternally used to the long hours he spends as an athlete, so he’s since taken it upon himself to try to be productive before you wake.

“mornin’” his voice is still raspy and warm, the afterthought of sleep apparent on his softened expression that he holds when looking at you. atsumu chuckles quietly under his breath when you press your face between his shoulder blades, snaking your arms around his waist. he still smells like the floral detergent of your bedsheets and the buttery sandalwood of his body wash.

“you’re burning the bacon, already.” you snicker into his shirt, earning a click of his tongue, “don’t ya’ like it crispy?” he counters playfully, using a fork to turn over one of the bubbling strips.

“yeah, i do, but,” you peak from around his back, pointing at the darkened bacon in the pan, “those are totally charred.”

atsumu scoffs teasingly, peering down at you, “they are not.” they really are about to be unsalvageable. you laugh dryly under your breath, using your hip to bump him out of the way of the stove, taking the bacon off the heat. atsumu puts up no fight, leaning on the counter to watch you grab a plate, eyes filled with a mushy lovesick glow. you should be used to this kind of unadulterated display of adoration, but it still makes your cheeks heat up like it did when you were in high school.

“i missed ya’,” he whispers softly, just loud enough for you to hear. you glance over your shoulder at him, smirking in confusion, “i didn’t go anywhere, did i?”

atsumu simply offers a content laugh, grabbing a piece of bacon from the plate, “i meant i missed ya while you were asleep.” he rolls his eyes as if it’s the most logical thing to assume in the world. you snort playfully, “weren’t you only awake for, like, 10 minutes before me?”

taking a (rather difficult) bite from the piece bacon, he nods, “exactly.”

𝐨𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮 𝐦𝐢𝐲𝐚 ✶ 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞

“sexy to someone is all i really want.”

osamu peered into your hotel bathroom upon smelling the scent of your perfume, a usual indication he has since learned that meant you were nearly done getting ready. an expression of confusion contorts his face into a frown at the sight of your own unhappy grimace.

“what’s wrong?” he inquires softly, watching your eyes through your reflection in the mirror. you groan in bemusement, setting the perfume bottle down, “nothing’s cooperating with me today, look,” you ruffle your hair a bit, trying to place it the way in which it usually sits on your head.

apart from your hair, you feel like you might have rushed too much on your makeup, and when you look in the mirror, maybe your dress doesn’t go as well with your shoes as you thought it did when packing.

you and osamu were in tokyo tonight, getting ready to go down for a celebratory dinner for the grand opening of the new branch of onigiri miya. while the thought of seeing all of your friends in one place was exciting, your hasty attempt to get ready in time was beginning to dampen your mood.

“what are ya talkin’ about, darlin’?” osamu knit his brows, genuinely baffled by what you could be implying as he leans against the doorframe. you blow out a short breath of frustration, gesturing at the mirror, “i feel like i look like a mess.”

osamu’s lips part in disbelief, the corners twitching in annoyance, “are ya kiddin’?” he scoffs, leaning forward to place a big hand on your arm. you turn away from your reflection, looking up at him, surprised to see such a perplexed expression upon his face.

“yer ridiculous, ya know that?” he scoffs, already pulling you out of the bathroom, “i’m serious.” you whine in frustration with yourself, begrudgingly following him towards the door. osamu lets go of the soft hold he has on your arm, turning to face you; he bends over to level with you, shaking his head, “yer the most beautiful person i have ever seen in my life, ya know that?”

you go quiet, crossing your arms as he stands back up to open the door for you. osamu glances over his shoulder, a wry grin occupying his lips now as he shakes his head once more, “i seriously can’t believe ya, sometimes.”

you knew osamu better than to think there was any actual malice hidden behind his frustration with you. leave it to him to fix the unfixable. as you walk down the hotel hallway, the way he drapes an arm around your shoulder suddenly makes you consider that he might be right. the admiration in his eyes as he looks at you makes you feel like maybe you are the most beautiful person in the world.

𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐚 ✶ 𝐠𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐧𝐨𝐰

“when i drive, i always check over the seat, i could see you right there, waiting for me”

it was much too late for this type of situation to be launched at you so suddenly, you knew that, but you still chose to unlock the door when you saw suna through your peephole.

you could tell he was drunk, his cheeks were bright red, hair mussed and eyes lidded with exhaustion. “what are you-” you hiss under your breath as he makes his effort to push into your apartment, experiencing no resistance from you as you let him stumble in. suna turns to face you upon hearing the door click shut, a lazy grin gracing his face.

“hi,” he snickers, readjusting his unstable stance. “hey.” you return, crossing your arms, “you know it’s late, right?” the clock on your phone reads 1:30, exactly two hours past when you should have been asleep. “i knooow.” he muses, walking over to collapse on your couch.

“are you just gonna sleep here?” you scoff incredulously, watching him roll over to look at you, grinning contentedly. “nah, came here to say something.” suna rasps, patting the cushion of the couch beside his head as if he owns the place.

against your better judgement, you choose to oblige, sitting down with a sigh as he makes an effort to sit up hunched beside you. “you know i’m not an idiot, right?” he starts, an unusual mixture of honesty and playfulness in his drunken tone. you crease your brows in confusion, “what are you talking about?”

“i know,” he nods, leaning back onto the couch, “i know what we’ve been doing this whole time.” you feel your heart begin to race, he can’t possibly be hinting at that, can he?

all the playful flirting, the lingering touches and longing glances around friends. they were meant to never be discussed, a secret so forbidden that even the two who kept it mustn’t acknowledge it. the practically invisible elephant in the room. suna was about to mess it all up, and you weren’t sure if your heart beat ten times faster with fear or excitement.

“what?” your mouth has long gone dry, words unsaid all dying on your tongue before they can even flow out to defend yourself. “i’m tired of it.” suna mumbles out, closing his eyes, then cracking one open to look at you, “aren’t you?”

he doesn’t wait for your response, though there wasn’t enough room for thought in your mind to formulate one, anyways. “i used to think i could ignore it, but i never realized how much i think about it until recently,” suna swallows, then turns to face you, head lolling against the couch, “am i wrong? it’s been like this the whole time, hasn’t it?”

you frown, “what do you mean?”

“you’ve liked me this whole time, haven’t you?” suna whispers, the tenderness of vulnerability making him sound so quiet, “because all i do is think about what things would be like if we stopped pretending like nothing was happening.”

there he goes, spoiling the quiet little mutual crush you two shared. something that started small enough not to notice, but grew until it boiled over, and one of you were bound to crack. it was suna who cracked first, albeit drunk, but you knew in the hushed whisper of his confession, that he meant every word of it.

“i-…” your words are lost to you, anything you thought to say no longer exists. suna reaches up a calloused hand, sloppily brushing a piece of hair from your face, “m’ really tired of missing you when you’re not around…wan’ you ‘round…all the time.” he’s beginning to slur his words, and you realize how drunk he actually is, his breaths slowing with the tightening grips of sleep.

as suna’s eyes flutter shut, you can’t help but wish he doesn’t forget about this when morning seeps in through your living room windows and wakes him up from a long, drunken slumber.

𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐫𝐮 𝐨𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚 ✶ 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐚

“(you make me wanna) buy a new dress, (you make me wanna) slip off a new dress”

you can’t believe how different life feels when you completely give in to love. how have you gone so long without the addictive sensation of loving and being loved? with tooru around, the blandest situation becomes technicolor; the chirping of birds by your window in the morning is no longer annoying, the coffee shop seems to always make your order right, and you look prettier in the mirror than you ever have before.

tonight the moon did not bring the chill of seaside winds with her, instead, the warm kiss of a summer’s breeze drifted through the air. you and tooru had long forgotten about your walk back to the car after dinner and had ended up at the pier, salty sea air dancing through locks of hair and playing with the hem of the dress you’d bought specifically for this date.

a warm pair of hands come from behind you, fitting snug against your hips as oikawa tucks his chin into the crook of your neck, pressing a kiss behind your ear. “have i mentioned you look beautiful tonight?” he murmurs. before, you would’ve been so embarrassed at how easily he could make you blush, but now it doesn’t matter.

“i think you’ve mentioned it a couple of times.” you hum in response, leaning into his touch. oikawa snickers, watching waves lap against each other in a foamy dance. “could i mention it again?” he returns slyly and you giggle, “i’ll allow it.”

tooru leans forward, whispering into the shell of your ear, “you look beautiful tonight.” he seems all too pleased at the way your cheeks burn red, how easily you could be flustered if you let yourself be.

“how’d i get so lucky, hm?” he adds, nosing into your cheek, following the soft touch with a peppering of kisses along the side of your face. “tooru,” you whisper, voice shaky with the aftertaste of laughter, “hm?” he purrs into your skin.

you bring up a hand to place on the other side of his face, situating your head to return a chaste kiss to his cheek, “let’s head home, yeah?”

oikawa stands up straight again, brushing his fingers over to spot you’d kissed you suddenly. while he prides himself on his ability to make you flustered, sometimes he conveniently ignores the fact that you’ve always had the exact same effect in tenfold.

“i think that’s a great idea.” he muses, slipping a hand from your waist to link fingers with your own as you walk back up the pier. in the midst of your lovesick chatter, he interrupts you, “hey, my love?”

“yeah?” you mutter lightly in response.

“i forgot what direction we parked the car in.”

𝐡𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐳𝐮𝐦𝐢 ✶ 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮

“i really hate to admit it, i put my pride on the line, ‘cause when i met you, i knew it, i’d thank you for your time.”

being like this was never easy for hajime, which is why he chose against this for so long. it was a tiring six-month battle of hallway encounters and awkward elevator rides before he finally admitted to himself that he was head over heels for the girl across the hallway from him.

loneliness seems so distant now, and he’s long chased it away in return for your sleeping figure beside him. iwaizumi can’t imagine what his life would be like nowadays if his pillows didn’t smell like you or his shoes didn’t fit so perfectly next to yours at the end of the day.

he can’t find it in himself to sleep tonight, and neither can you, a short moment of surprise exchanged as you roll over to find he’s already looking down at you. after a blink or two, the both of you felt grins of amusement tugging on either corners of your lips. hajime pulls you closer, wrapping his big arms around your torso, thumbing the small of your back.

“you’re my favorite, you know that?” he mumbles into your hair with a certain waggishness to his words. you huff out a short laugh, “favorite what?”

“just in general.” he returns, moving back slightly to look down at you with big eyes full of fondness, “i like you a lot more than anything else.”

giggling, you bring a hand up to cup the side of his face, feeling the setting of his jaw under your palm at the touch, “you’re not so bad yourself, either.”

hajime scoffs in amusement, rolling his eyes, “oh, thanks.”

the dark bedroom is filled with the mirth of quiet laughter, a moment that seems to last forever, a feeling that you wish to keep in your pocket and carry around. there’s nothing extraordinarily funny happening, and perhaps you’re only laughing in disbelief of the fact that this is real

living with hajime is like moving in with your best friend, there’s nothing about plain existence that’s entertaining, but with him everything is funnier than it’s ever been. you two never get enough sleep because you’re always up for hours, savoring each word, touching each other’s skin, feeding off the thrill of breathing each other’s air like the opportunity is only for one night.

hajime is glad that you made him a weak man. there’s nothing more in the world he could have ever wanted than this, and he’d be thanking you for sharing your time until the day he died.

𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐢𝐣𝐢 ✶ 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐢𝐧

“simple thing, i don’t need much to like, i find.”

saturday nights were never spent like they used to be back in college. you suppose that’s a part of growing up, becoming boring. but despite how plain the pattern of your life has become since you’ve started working and settling down, you never once considered wanting anything more.

akaashi’s cramming days worth of work into one night, lips stained with red wine as he types with precision onto the clacking keyboard of his laptop. you’re on the other side of the couch, legs bent up to support your own laptop that you draft an email on. you let out a pained groan at a sudden ache that tears through your thigh, setting the laptop onto the coffee table to stretch out the tight muscle.

keiji pauses, looking up at you. his glasses were almost askew, sliding down his nose. a cigarette hung loosely from his lips, a collegiate habit that sometimes still haunts the both of you, especially on nights like these. “is your leg cramping?” he inquires, setting his laptop on the cushion beside him. you nod, kneading at the skin.

a soft breath of surprise sucks in through your lips when a pair dexterous hands replace your own, pushing between the muscles with precision. you look up to find akaashi’s focused expression, what was left of his cigarette burning out on the ashtray placed haphazardly on the couch’s arm.

sudden relief washes across your body as his index finger pushes into the right spot, a low sigh leaking from your lips. akaashi glances back up, a rare smirk making its appearance, “better?” you nod in response.

akaashi looks at his watch, then up at you, “it’s kinda late, huh?” he notes, leaning over to shut his laptop. “it was kinda late two hours ago, it’s really late now.” you return, stretching your sore back out. once again, akaashi’s hands return to your body, kneading at the tired muscles without a second thought.

a soft kiss is pressed to the tender back of your neck, it smells like red wine and cigarettes, you longed to turn around and taste his lips, but restrained yourself. “you tired?” he asks, already knowing the answer.

“i just…i really need to finish this project by monday, i’m worried that-“ keiji silences you with another kiss, this time to your cheek, “you won’t get anything done if you’re tired, why don’t you work on it tomorrow?”

you think about arguing, but you ultimately know that he’s right. your shoulders relax and you let your body weight rest up against his chest, savoring the rise and fall of his ribs with every breath he takes.

tonight was simple, perhaps a bit stressful, but that was the typical night with keiji nowadays. you couldn’t ever find yourself growing restless with this, however, and moments like these made you feel like no matter how unremarkable nights like these are, you love them more than anything. you love keiji more than anything.

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tragikomizm · 28 days ago

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art student!touya headcanons bc why not can you tell that i love artsy people?

tw: smoking and getting high, touya is a loser but we all already know that

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touya had no idea what to do with himself after high school. he chose studying art, because it seemed to be easy lmao he also really wanted to piss of endeavor

after college he wants to be a tattoo artist (who’s surprised?)

touya who’s working at your local record store and always trying to start a conversation with you about the albums you buy. in his head, he has a whole ass plan to make you swoon but, in reality, all he manages to do is asking you if you like this band and recommending you some new music he thinks you might like

you giggle everytime he stumbles over his words and thank him, assuring you’ll check out his recommendations. and oh boyy he’s whipped. he even started thinking that maybe you are trying to seduce him

he literally doesn’t know the difference between being simply friendly and flirting. he’s delusional, he’s stupid

(he rejected so many people that were hitting on him, because he thought they were just being nice to him. but with you, oh that’s a different story)

you and touya met through keigo who was done with listening touya talk about his pretty customer. you’ll probably never forget his face when he realized his best friend is also friends with his crush

after that you two started talking more. he’s still so painfully awkward, because this man has no idea how to talk to you

bold over text, super awkward in person. that’s it

before keigo introduced you to him, touya only annoyed takami with his constant monologue about you. but now? everyone falls his victim. his roommate? shigaraki got too many warnings about way too high volume on his headphones and he still can hear touya’s yapping. his family? shouto and natsuo start throwing at touya every object that just happens to be near them, whenever your name leaves their big brothers lips. fuyumi just asks him when he’s gonna ask you out and he shuts up as fast as he opened his mouth. and his coworkers? spinner daily fights the urge to get high before work but he doesn’t want to get fired, so he’s forced to keep up with touya sober. the only person that enjoys his yapping is toga, which isn’t very surprising, really. she forces touya to listen to her talk about ochako in exchange tho

and don’t even get me started on his drawings. his sketchbook is filled with you. every. single. page. he doodles you every time he gets ahold of something that can write

“todoroki, for the love of god, could you stop drawing your girlfriend on my desk?” keigo showed you that doodle. at some point he also told you about touya’s crush on you. he’ll complain about touya’s constantly running mouth, but he’s a noisy bitch as well. a match made in hell

you often bump into touya at random parties keigo or rumi take you to. and everytime that happens you two decide to leave your friends and go on a side quest. later you need to explain to your friends why they can’t find you anywhere at the party. you should’ve informed them beforehand but in touya’s presence it’s easy to forget about the surrounding you world

especially, when he finally gets comfortable with you. there’s so many topics he wants to discuss with you, he literally can’t shut his mouth. you might never get a chance to kiss him

takes you with him whenever he goes making graffiti. cmon he would do that

touya secretly wishes you would model for him. but he will never admit to that

deep late night talks while sharing a cig or blunt? god please. all you have to do is text him that you found this new spot with a cool view and he’s already under your window

he invites you over to listen to the new cd he bought. he collects cds argue with the wall. he’ll be also very offended if you don’t invite him over to listen to the album you bought

don’t worry he’ll get over it quickly, he’ll be very petty about it tho

at first, when you asked him if you could see his art he refused. he’s shy yk. especially considering the fact that most of his sketches are of you. touya eventually showed you his art when you told him about that doodle on keigos desk. he ghosted you for hours after that, because he thought you’ll make fun of him </33

has like 5 different playlists made for you. all consisting different music genres and for different occasions. one is full of songs you recommended him. other is filled with songs that remind him of you. you guys also share a playlist, which is a mix of your favorite songs and is a total chaos

touya doesn’t have a license nor his own car (duh), so when he asks you if you’re up for a ride it means that you’re going to drive and he’ll just sit there, looking pretty and play music

getting high with touya is… interesting. he gets really clingy and all philosophical. so many what if questions. rumi has a couple of videos of your conversations from the times you two got high at your place. she says she’s going to play them at your wedding

“hear me out on beetlejuice” high off his ass touya, after you came up with a genius idea of watching beetlejuice

touya keeps complaining about you spending more time at the store and distracting him but we all know he doesn’t mind. maybe expect those moments when you talk shit about him with toga and spinner

you also have a bet if those two teenagers that keep having dates at the store will end up together. you think that the blonde boy has a chance, while touya well… he says that the girl’s to cool for this guy

if you two can’t meet, he’ll just call instead. probably, on some ungodly hour, because his sleeping schedule is nonexistent. will insist on not hanging up when you want to go to sleep. he promises that he’ll end up the call, since he’s going to stay up a little bit longer. and he always forgets about that. one time you got woken up by rei, trying to get touya out of bed

he definitely had planned the first kiss. the thing is — he never had a chance to use his plan. mostly because he was waiting for the perfect moment. you were the one who kissed him. during one of your many late night rides, while you were sitting in your car in some empty parking lot. he was taking about something, you can’t remember what it was, his eyes shining as he was explaining, streetlamps light falling on his face and making him look even prettier then usual. if it was even possible, because it’s touya we’re talking about, the pretty boy cmon. you almost felt bad about interrupting him. but he didn’t seem to mind when he practically crushed you between him and your cars door

after that he thanked you, like he didn’t took your breath away a second ago

so many handmade gifts !!!

art museum dates. holding hands, talking about your favorite artists and pieces, standing in front of the artwork and discussing its meaning, touya explaining you different techniques. either that or pointing at the weirdest medieval animals and saying “you”

i said that once and i’ll say it again. he’s your trained photographer

he’ll also gladly turn into your editor

will touch you on purpose if his hands are dirty from painting. annoying bastard

definitely will become your human canvas if you’ll get bored and want to draw on him. touya will try his best not to wash it down during shower. he might even skip shower, who knows

obviously, touya has piercings and tattoos because it’s touya

and yes, he lets you color his tattoos, duh

──────────────────────

no way i finally wrote sth (nobody gives a shit girl)

im working on sth a little bigger i promise

yes i sneaked a little togachako here can you blame me?

and yes thats jirou and denki, they have record store dates

projecting as always im trying to manifest a bf thru this silly posts

or a crush at least

btw touya and keigo definitely made out at some point im just sayin

#touya todoroki headcanons #touya todoroki x reader #touya todoroki #dabi touya #mha touya #touya x reader #dabi x reader #mha dabi #mha #bnha #bnha dabi #my hero academia #boku no hero academia

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honeytonedhottie · 4 months ago

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HONEYS IT GIRL MAGAZINE august edition⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🎀

welcome back to honeys it girl magazine, this is the august catalog. get ready for the inside scoop on data that i've collected, things i've learned/started doing, and just general info like that organized in kind of a teen-magazine inspired fashion. a magazine for it girls ✨ and now please enjoy, the it girl magazine.

WHAT UR DREAMS REVEAL ABOUT YOU ;

have u ever woken up from a vivd dream and thought "what does that even mean?" yeah same. so i decided to dive into this for this catalog and here's what i found. dreams represent unconscious desires and wishes. we have dreams that mirror our emotional state.

three of the most common dreams that people have are falling, being chased, and dying. which are all inherently negative things. when u dream of falling, it shows a loss of control over an important situation. when u dream of being chased, thats ur brains way of telling u that ur stressed out. and when u dream of dying, it could represent a part of you that is dying or something you'd like to escape.

and dreams about death are the most scary to me cuz i have MASSIVE fear of death but there are more than just negative dreams. usually my dreams consist of things that radiate positivity, or my dreams can be flat out weird. either way, if i remember my dreams i like to write them down and yap about them with my friends.

HAIR HEAVEN ;

i thought that since its leo season and leo's have the BEST hair its only right that hair is the topic of this month's beauty section. so im going to focus on talking about styling, treatments and general care.

how you style ur hair is SO super important to ur whole vibe and aesthetic. hair styles look different on everyone for a multitude of reasons but one of the most obvious is that people have different face shapes and different styles are flattering on different faces.

remember, u dont have to get the same haircut as ur favorite celeb bcuz its so much more cute and original when u get ur own haircut…💬🎀

now unto hair treatments. hair treatments are so important to keep ur hair healthy and lustrous and just well taken care of. so im going to give some hair mask and treatment recipes to keep ur hair healthy and radiant…💬🎀

now finally lets talk about some general tips to keep ur hair gorgeous and lovely on a day to day basis.

♡ use scrunchies instead of elastics when u can to avoid putting strain on ur hair

♡ incorporate collagen into ur diet with supplements or vitamins because its rly rly good for hair skin and nails

♡ when using heat on ur hair, use a heat protectant and try not to apply heat to ur hair on a daily basis

AUGUST MUSIC ;

this month i've really been listening to CHECK by the girl group FLO and let me just say, that song is an absolute MASTERPIECE. the music video was amazing. i love love the cinematography and the concept cuz its super hyper girly just like me and the girls looked so amazing and beautiful.

one of my favorite albums that also dropped this month was latto's sugar honey iced tea album. latto is so so talented and gorgeous and she rly ate down with this album so i highly recommend it to anyone who's been thinking about giving it a listen. my favorite songs on the album are shrimp & grits, look what u did and S/O to me.

BACK TO SCHOOL SEASON ;

for a lot of us, its back to school season and its the time to kind of transition from summer -> into the school year SO here are 5 tips on how to seamlessly transition from ur hot girl summer into a successful school year…💬🎀

♡ get urself an established routine

get urself an established routine 2 weeks before u start cuz the earlier u start ur routine, the quicker it'll be for it to become a habit. adjust ur sleep schedule by sleeping a little earlier, and going to bed at a reasonable time.

♡ reflect and write down some goals

reflect on ur last school year, what u did good and what u did not so good and based on that formulate a couple goals that u can commit to and hold urself accountable to so that then ur making progress thats trackable.

♡ be organized

organize ur notion, ur space, ur school bag EVERYTHING. organization is so crucial especially for school and can protect u from feeling overwhelmed and cluttered.

♡ brief review

im not the kind of person that like summer work, in fact i hate it. but a week or two before school starts i'll do a quick refresh or research the classes that im going to be taking to kind of set myself up for success.

♡ fix ur attitude

stay POSITIVE and dont take on a bad approach to this school year before you've even started. believe in urself, ur discipline and ur abilities and stay in a good mindset.

i have lots of back to school content planned still that hasn't dropped including studying, resources etc so that we can slay this school year…💬🎀

BACK TO SCHOOL FASHION ;

details for back to school fashion/academic princess style :

♡ plaid

♡ grey, pink, black and white color scheme

♡ collared shirts and jackets

♡ pleated mini skirts

♡ sweaters

♡ headbands

♡ knee/thigh high socks

long bouncy curls with a headband that matches something on ur outfit. ballet flats and leg warmers. baby pink gloss and square shaped french tips, delicate necklaces and bracelets…💬🎀

when i think of pink academia fashion the first person that comes to my brain is cher from clueless. here are some of her most princess academia moments in the movie.

cher emphasizes literally everything i've talked about in the pink princess school fashion scheme. the pretty socks, fluffy pens, collared shirts and pink->white->grey color scheme. even the way that she does her hair is very very pretty and flattering.

WHATS MY HOROSCOPE (AUGUST 25-31) ;

♡ you’re the star of the show this month, virgo! it all begins on august 4th with a leo new moon that awakens your zone of spirituality. you could be focused on sacred release to clear space, welcoming in new beginnings. confidence is cultivated through deep soul-searching. on the same day, venus enters your sign, bringing a boost to your energy, creative projects, and style. mercury stations retrograde, also in virgo, encouraging self-reflection.

♡ for aries, it’s an exciting month ahead! the action begins on august 4th, when the leo new moon activates your zone of pleasure, inviting you to follow your passions! a playful approach in romance and creativity can inspire new beginnings that feel fun and stress-free. on the same day, venus enters virgo and visits your sector that rules self-care, encouraging you to embrace healthier habits. In the evening, mercury goes retrograde in virgo, signaling a time for you to get centered.

♡ for taurus, it’s an emotionally powerful month. it all begins on august 4th, when the leo new moon activates your zone of intuition, bringing major insights that lead you to new beginnings. with your environment in the spotlight as well, you might use this time to beautify your living space, pulling in bold animal prints and patterns. later in the day, love planet venus enters virgo, activating your zone of pleasure. take a practical approach to love, money, and creativity. then, mercury stations retrograde in virgo, urging you to release perfectionism and rest.

♡ for gemini, his month is full of connection! the magic starts on august 4th, when the leo new moon activates your communication sector, inspiring you to shine your light, share your ideas, and express yourself. leo’s passion blends with the fresh slate of the new moon to bring you an exciting new path to explore. later, venus enters virgo, awakening your intuition so you can manifest! mercury stations retrograde in virgo as the evening comes to a close, marking a period of rest and awareness.

♡ for cancer, success is yours this month! it all begins on august 4th, when the new moon in leo visits your money zone, inspiring you to share your talents and build up your resources. the bold expression of your skills impresses others and serves as a beautiful boost of confidence for you too! you’ll crave more meaningful conversations when venus enters virgo, awakening your communication sector. mercury stations retrograde in virgo at the end of the day, signaling a time of required pause.

♡ for leo, it’s an expansive month! the excitement starts on august 4th, when a new moon in your sign ignites a path to new beginnings. you’re stepping into the most confident version of yourself! set intentions for the future with courage and inspiration. on the same day, venus enters practical virgo and visits your financial sector, helping you organize money matters and work projects. mercury goes retrograde in virgo that night, encouraging you to embrace stress reduction and physical relaxation.

♡ for libra, it’s an enlightening month ahead, libra! the leo new moon on august 4th activates your friendship sector and invites you to step into the social spotlight. you could be making plans with friends or passionately helping others. set intentions for the future and remember that dreams do come true! venus enters virgo later to help you get grounded as you explore your emotional realm. mercury stations retrograde in virgo that night, highlighting the importance of practicality.

♡ for scorpio, prepare for a month of empowerment! the leo new moon on august 4th inspires you to showcase your talents. by doing so, important people take notice and doors of opportunity open. don’t be afraid to courageously share your expertise. venus enters virgo later in the day, enhancing your powers of negotiation as well as your charm. mercury stations retrograde in virgo before the day ends, signaling a need for patience.

♡ for sagittarius, it’s an adventurous month! the fun begins on august 4th, when the leo new moon lights up your travel zone, encouraging you to explore on physical, intellectual, and spiritual levels. embrace new beginnings that bring abundance into your life. venus enters virgo on the same day, inviting in well-deserved acknowledgment and opportunity. mercury stations retrograde in virgo, asking you to review your long-term commitments and responsibilities.

♡ for capricorn, it’s a month of personal growth, capricorn! the leo new moon on august 4th awakens your zone of transformation and brings change. you could be healing your relationship with money or crafting a plan to tackle debt. when you surrender into evolution, manifestations become reality. venus enters virgo later and lands in your adventure zone. seek out experiences that feel fun, expansive, and abundant. mercury goes retrograde in virgo before the night ends and asks you to slow down.

♡ for aquarius, your relationships are highlighted this month, aquarius! the leo new moon on august 4th activates your relationship zone and opens new paths in love. create heart-led manifestations and enjoy quality time connecting with others. venus enters virgo on the same day and visits your sector of intimacy, encouraging you to bond beyond the physical plane. communicate with care when mercury goes retrograde in virgo that night, marking a time of potential misunderstandings and snafus.

♡ for pisces, get ready to fall in love this month, pisces! it begins with the leo new moon on august 4th that encourages you to love the most important person of all: you! this is the time to take excellent care of your mind, body, and soul so you can feel rejuvenated. venus enters virgo the same day, activating your relationship zone. strengthen your bonds! mercury goes retrograde in virgo that night, marking a time of healing.

CELEBRITY GOSSIP - BLAKE LIVELY ;

this month the movie "it ends with us" was released starring blake lively and justin baldoni and it has been gaining LOTS of traction on the internet for a multitude of reasons. i haven't been to watch the movie yet but if u have, tell me how it was!

the reason why im going to be talking about this in the celebrity gossip section is because of the fiasco blake lively and how out of touch she is…💬🎀

blake is getting called out for how shes been acting during her press tour for it ends with us and her past actions and behaviors that rly showcase how tone deaf she is. the movie is based on the book it ends with us that was written by colleen hoover, and in the book it explores topics such as domestic violence, emotional abuse etc. because of the serious nature of the movie, her saying "grab ur friends, wear ur florals" was a tone mismatch.

a clip of her is going viral where she was asked by the interviewer on, what was the best way someone who understands the themes of the movie, could talk to her. and she responds with literal sarcasm. leaving everyone confused and kind of put off. furthermore during the filming for the movie about literal DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. she launches a haircare brand. which could just be unfortunate timing but i feel like with how good marketing is, this wasn't a coincidence but thats just my opinion.

the last thing i wanna talk about is an interview a while back when blake was pregnant. the interviewer congratulated her saying "congrats on ur little bump" which is so sweet. blake responds "congrats on YOUR little bump" which was SO uncalled for because one, the lady wasn't pregnant and two, the lady literally couldn't have kids. throughout the interview blake just continued to be absolutely obnoxious, ignoring the interviewers questions and just being such a horrible guest.

anyways i'd love to hear ur thoughts and opinions on this situation in the comments and if ur kinda curious about the celeb gossip i recommend watching this video bcuz d'angelo rly explains everything well.

STYLE DISSECTION MARILYN MONROE ;

marilyn monroe is an absolute ICON and legend in literally every form of the word. shes an amazing role model and something that i rly rly love about her is ur style and her beauty which is why im doing this month's style dissection on her…💬🎀

one of my favorite marilyn monroe outfits was her gorgeous deep burgandy silky dress in the film how to marry a millionaire. in this film we get the ICONIC diamonds are a girls best friend and honestly they're right. marilyn sports GORGEOUS diamond jewelry in this movie that rly tie her outfits together and give the air of luxury and opulence that is so so hard to recreate which is why no one can do it quite like marilyn.

marilyn rly made the iconic 1950s glam what it was. everything from her signature platinum blonde bob to her gorgeous, feminine allure. in her film gentlemen prefer blondes shes wearing an absolutely stunning orange dress that shows off her body. it has a super flowy mermaid cut at the bottom which compliments the snugness of the dress around her waist, hips and chest.

i could talk for HOURS about the fashion icon that marilyn monroe is but we dont have that kind of time in this years august issue of the it girls magazine…💬🎀

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notmysophie · 4 months ago

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Hozier reading list

Literary references in Hozier music

Alighieri, Dante; Inferno

The story of Francesca da Rimini as told in canto V inspired the song Francesca.

The album Unreal Unearth is arranged as a journey through nine circles of hell as they are described in the Inferno part of the Divine Comedy.

The title of the song Through Me (the flood) is a reference to the first lines of canto III.

Hozier read the translation by Robert Pinsky (https://www.rte.ie/radio/radio1/clips/22285692/)

Beckett, Samuel; Endgame

The song Wasteland, Baby! Takes inspiration from this play. (5 september 2023) (https://www.pastemagazine.com/music/hozier/cover-story-hozier-unreal-unearth)

O'Brien, Flann; the Third Policeman

The character of de Selby in the Third Policeman inspired the songs de Selby part 1 and 2.

Heaney, Seamus; At the Wellhead

The song To Noise Making (Sing) contains a8n audio fragment of Heaney reading this poem.

Heaney, Seamus; The Cure at Troy

The line "Or honey hope even on this side of the grave again?" In the song "To Noise Making (Sing) " is inspired by the line "History says, Don't hope / On this side of the grave." in this poem.

Joyce, James; A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

The line "Shaking the wings of their terrible youths" in the song Angel of Small Death & the Codeine Scene is derived from a line in this book. As mentioned in the interview with Zane Lowe for Apple Music (august 28, 2023) (https://youtu.be/y5JpgNIkOz4?si=Yg1GVewfZlHkdVm1)

Also mentioned as general inspiration in an interview with the Daily Meal (october 28, 2014) (https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel)

Mack, dr. Katie

Astrophysicist dr. Katie Mack is mentioned by name in the song No Plan. A quote from the song is used in her book The End of Everything (Astrophysically speaking)

Neruda, Pablo, Sonnet XVII

The songs de Selby part 1 and part 2 take some inspiration from this poem. (Mentioned when introducing the song during a concert)

Ovid, Metamorphoses

The story of Icarus is mentioned in the song Sunlight and inspired the song I, Carrion (Icarian).

The story of Orpheus and Eurydice is mentioned in the song Talk.

Plato; The Allegory of the Cave

The phrase "Adding shadows to the walls of the cave" in the song Sedated refers to this story.

Swift, Jonathan; A Modest Proposal

Inspiration for the song Eat Your Young.

Wilde, Oscar; Chanson

The line "a rope in hand for your other man to hang from a tree" in the song From Eden" is inspired by the line "And a hempen rope for your own love / To hang upon a tree." in this poem.

Yeats, W. B.; The Second Coming

The line "To Bethlehem it slouched" in the song NFWMB is almost directly copied from this poem.

Yeats, W. B.; Leda and the Swan

Inspiration for the song Swan Upon Leda

Other books recommended/mentioned by Hozier

Amis, Martin; The Zone of Interest

Recommended by Hozier in an 'Ask Me Anything' before the release of the album Wasteland, baby! on reddit in 2019

Beckett, Samuel; Not I

Hozier joked the album Unreal Unearth would contain four tracks, two of them being recordings of him reading this play with his mouth full of marshmallows.

The cover art of Unreal Unearth is said to reference this play.

Bukowski, Charles

Mentioned as a teenage favorite (https://youtu.be/e5pFwDvcIGA)

Ó Cadhain, Máirtín; Graveyard Clay (Cré Na Cille)

Mentioned as his current read in an instagram Q&A on December 1, 2021

Eliot, T. S.

https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel

Heaney, Marie; Over Nine Waves, a Book of Irish Legends

(Source? Mentioned on social media?)

Heaney, Seamus

https://www.irishtimes.com/culture/music/hozier-why-seamus-heaney-s-last-words-mean-so-much-to-me-1.3797926

Herbert, Frank; Dune

Mentioned as a current read/audiobook on How Long Gone podcast episode 614. March 6, 2024

Joyce, James; Ulysses

https://youtu.be/s0Ux72N4K10

Kierkegaard, Søren; The Sickness unto Death

(Source?)

Orwell, George; 1984

https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel/

Rubin, Rick; The Creative Act

Mentioned as his current read in an interview for WNYC Radio, 17 March 2023

https://youtu.be/Cd2uxpD9Hc8?si=cJ8bKrfFeXk_WS2F

Salinger, J. D.; Catcher in the Rye

https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel/

Wilde, Oscar

https://youtu.be/s0Ux72N4K10

https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel/

Williams, Niall; This Is Happiness

Mentioned as his current read at a fan meet & greet (Bristol, 6 August 2023)

Yeats, W. B.

https://www.thedailymeal.com/irish-born-musician-hozier-slithered-here-eden-bring-us-his-gospel/

Poetry/stories read by Hozier in livestreams/videos (and the books he read them from)

3 July 2020 Instagram live

Seamus Heaney; Postscript (the Spirit Level)

Seamus Heaney; A Kite for Michael and Christopher (Station Island)

W. B. Yeats; No Second Troy (W. B. Yeats Poems selected by Seamus Heaney)

W. B. Yeats; To a Friend Whose Work Has Come to Nothing (W. B. Yeats Poems selected by Seamus Heaney)

Ovid, Daedalus and Icarus (Metamorphoses, translated by David Raeburn, penguin classics)

Sinéad Morrissey; & Forgive Us Our Trespasses (Being Human edited by Neil Astley)

Also mentioned; Staying Alive edited by Neil Astley

Seen on the table; Fear Not by Stephen James Smith

10 July 2020 Instagram live

Seamus Heaney; HÖFN (District & Circle)

Seamus Heaney; District & Circle (District & Circle)

Stephen Dunn; Sadness

Stephen Dunn; Sweetness

Ovid; Orpheus and Eurydice (Metamorphoses, translated by David Raeburn, penguin classics)

T. S. Eliot; The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock (Collected Poems 1909-1962)

Brendan Kennelly; Begin

17 July 2020 Instagram live

Ezra Pound; And the Days Are Not Full Enough

Wilfred Owen; Futility

James Joyce; A Flower Given to My Daughter

Pablo Neruda; Keeping Quiet

Langston Hughes; I, Too

Imtiaz Dharker; They'll Say She Must Be From Another Country

W. B. Yeats; When You Are Old

Stephen James Smith; On the Bus (Fear Not)

Seamus Heaney; Saint Kevin and the Blackbird

Seamus Heaney; Sweeney Praises the Trees (Sweeney Astray)

Maya Angelou; Touched by an Angel

Garrison Keillor; Supper

Pablo Neruda; Sonnet XCIV (If I Die) (100 Love Sonnets, translated by Stephen Tapscott)

T. S. Eliot; Ash Wednesday (Collected Poems 1909-1962)

Ovid, the Four Ages (Metamorphoses, translated by David Raeburn, penguin classics)

Also mentioned; Ireland, My Ireland by Stephen James Smith

25 July 2020 Instagram live

Anne Stevenson; The Spirit is Too Blunt an Instrument

Katie Mack; The Slow Fade to Black (the End of Everything, Astrophysically Speaking)

Pablo Neruda; Sonnet XVII (One Hundred Love Sonnets, translated by Mark Eisner)

Kahlil Gibran; On Love (the Prophet)

Sharon Olds; True Love

Rita Ann Higgins; The Did-You-Come-Yets of the Western World

7 August 2020 Instagram live

James Joyce; Araby (Dubliners)

Also mentioned A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce

17 march 2021 Tiktok live

Brendan Kennelly; Begin

Derek Mahon; Everything is Going to Be Alright

Sinéad Morrissey; & Forgive Us Our Trespasses

Faisal Mohyuddin; Prayer (The Displaced Children of Displaced Children)

Pádraig Ó Tuama; How to Be Alone

Stephen James Smith; Dublin, You Are

Paula Meehan; Seed

Various reads

Seamus Heaney; At the Wellhead

https://youtu.be/uIBpT_rqUfA

Patrick Kavanagh; Peace

https://youtu.be/Iz1OXOFua4w

W. B. Yeats; He Wishes for the Cloths of Heaven

https://youtu.be/e5pFwDvcIGA

W. B. Yeats; A Coat

https://youtu.be/e5pFwDvcIGA

Seamus Heaney; Miracle

https://x.com/seamusheaneyest/status/1253626839316279296?s=20

#Hozier #Reading list #Literary references #There's still a few without source #And I haven't updated since march 31 #But I don't think he mentioned any new books anyway #Sooo...#Enjoy. I guess

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glass--beach · 3 months ago

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hi do you like ok computer (1997)

because i really just don't get it (especially as the second-best album of all time) but i reeeally want to & i respect your opinion on that a lot

yea that album kinda changed the course of my life lol. wall of text incoming

first - don’t let rym or aoty or whatever tell you what’s good and what isn’t, everybody’s got their own taste & criticisms that go against the grain are very important!! i will say anything that’s that consistently highly rated across different websites & publications is probably undeniably significant and worth listening to. whether listening feels like discovering a new favorite or sitting through a history lesson is where taste comes in. it’s important to interrogate the canon too as there is an enormous amount of implicit bias in what even gets in front of critics and in the metrics they grade music by. review aggregate sites have democratized this process a bit & all the good and bad of democracy has come with that lol.

so, the album gets praised for a couple of reasons - its innovative production, its commentary on the historical zeitgeist, and the pop appeal of much of the songwriting.

production - the album makes heavy use of cutting edge effects units, digital editing, computer trackers, sampling, and even features little bits of voice synthesis. most of it is stuff that had existed in music before radiohead, artists like aphex twin (and much of the rest of warp records’ 90s catalog) and bjork were ahead of the curve in a lot of the aesthetic aspects of okc and had influenced radiohead a lot, which is even more evident on their followup kid a. radiohead was not breaking new ground in using these sounds, but they were among the first to put it all in a rock context, taking cues from the weirder cuts on the beatles’ white album, the experimental “krautrock” band can, and miles davis’ classic jazz fusion album bitches brew.

context - radiohead had grown up during the decline of much of the social democratic programs that had helped to facilitate the education and performing careers of much of their early influences such as joy division and the smiths. by the time okc was being written they had lived through the austerity of the thatcher era, the fall of the soviet union, and now were watching the labour party turn increasingly neoliberal under tony blair. there was a general sentiment in the west that the progress of history had slowed or even stopped in favor of the neoliberal order. at the same time, tech was booming and computers were starting to find their way into more aspects of daily life. the album imagines a boring dystopia, where machines are rabidly advancing but humans are stuck in stasis. a major connecting theme is infrastructure - the airbag through which thom yorke is “born again,” the “cracks in the pavement,” the family politics that separate romeo and juliet in exit music, the mechanical voice of fitter happier giving contradictory directions for maintaining the status quo. even the escapist fantasy of no surprises comes in the form of carbon monoxide. and then, the record ends with the “ding” of an appliance that has completed its task.

songwriting - the band’s previous album the bends really is a pop masterpiece. i recommend it to anybody who wants to get into radiohead but doesn’t vibe with their later work. okc expands that compositional style through, for one thing, the more apparent influence of classical music on tracks like paranoid android or the Chopin homage exit music; let down even features polymetric layering characteristic of Steve Reich. it also features some songs that are too good to even need to push the envelope much, like karma police or one of my favorites, no surprises, which seems to reference the beach boys’ wouldn’t it be nice or the velvet underground’s sunday morning.

to be honest, i like okc mostly because it really spoke to me at a formative time in my life, when i was like 15 and felt heavily disconnected from the world around me. the album deals with those feelings in a very different context but it’s a feeling many people can relate to for many different reasons - i was closeted in a conservative culture, not a depressed british rock star lol. it also was an excellent gateway into many of the bands’ influences, who are also favorites of mine now. most people who love the album don’t really go as deep as i like to with understanding it, but maybe what i said here will give you something else to listen for, idk. maybe you just gave me an excuse to infodump about an album i love lol :)

#asks #if anyone is nerdier than me about this please feel free to correct me on anything here #especially the british history i am largely paraphrasing mark fisher here as i often am

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guxciestone · 11 months ago

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✧ CELEBRITY BIRTH CHART ANALYSIS ✧

— ariana grande.

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hii !! today, i am going to analyze ariana grande’s birth chart. this was recommended by an ask, and i’ve spent a long while making this post. so, i hope you enjoy and have a nice day !! 🌿✨‎ ‎ ‎

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Ariana Grande-Butera was born on June 26, 1993 in Boca Raton, Florida. She is an influential figure in contemporary popular music and has established herself as an ultimate pop icon, mostly known for her four-octave vocal range and whistle register. Ariana started as a theater kid, making her debut on Broadway in 2008 in Jason Robert Brown’s ‘13’. Over time, she begins to make her way as a Nickelodeon actor, primarily known for ‘Victorious’ (from 2010-13) and ‘Sam and Cat’ (2013-14)--a spin-off of the popular characters Cat Valentine and Sam Puckett from ‘iCarly’. Grande’s acting career gets put to a halt during the run of ‘Sam and Cat’ when she begins to focus on her music career and establishes herself as a certified music artist. Ariana’s first album “Yours Truly” came out on August 30, 2013. Ariana Grande’s most popular songs include “7 Rings”, “Thank U, Next”, “Side to Side”, “Dangerous Woman”, “Into You”, and “Positions”. She has achieved seven number one’s on the billboards and two grammy’s along with several other awards thus far.

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she identifies as:

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ a cancer sun, libra moon, and capricorn rising.

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❀ her personality ❀

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Sun square Moon indicates that Ariana has an internal struggle between her core values and emotional values. With her Sun in Cancer in the 6th, Grande is an individual who seeks comfortability and homeliness in her daily routines, responsibilities, and sense of duty. She has a nurturing, sweet, and soft-hearted nature. She could be particularly invested in family and friends and is more than likely always making efforts to be there for them at all times; however, with her Moon in Libra in the 9th house, Ariana also desires to achieve balance, tranquility, and pleasure in her life through learning new things, intaking more knowledge, and seeking new things in the world. She may be particularly spiritual and could be invested in the religious aspects in life more than others. Ariana Grande is always mentioning the law of attraction, and she even has multiple songs singing about he manifested her fame and fortune. Nonetheless, it seems like she seems to be struggling with integrating one of the two. This could particularly be about religious factors; perhaps she grew up in a religious family and she broke away from those doctrines and created her own sense of spirituality. Or perhaps she struggles to keep family close while also striving for spiritual and intellectual abundance and experiences. This aspect is also prominent in natives whose parents have separated.

Her ascendant ruler in the 2nd house immediately shows that Grande has a strong sense of self-worth and adequacy. She could hold herself to a high regard and have the ability to attract anything she wants with just a snap of a finger, because she easily attracts nice things when she begins to value herself just as much. Her capricorn ascendant shows she appears to have a mature, responsible, and respectable personality on the first impression. She has a petite figure, and she looks amazingly youthful for her age which is common amongst capricorn ascendants. Not to mention, she has a sarcastic yet humorous and charismatic nature that others seem to love about her with her venus trine ascendant. It is easier for Ariana to dress herself in a dominating yet attractive way to which others are pulled towards her, but also in awe of her glamor and prestige–she is able to maintain a signature while keeping it alluring, which I have also noticed in capricorn ascendant celebrities.

With her Venus in Taurus in the 4th house, this indicates that Grande had a pleasurable, practical, and secure childhood. She did grow up with money. Her mother, Joan Grande, was a CEO of a manufacturing company; and her father, Edward Grande, owned a graphic design firm. With this placement correlating to her ascendant, it seems that anyone would take notice of this luxurious air about her even without the fame.

Sun square Jupiter gives Ms. Grande a flamboyant, humorous, and entertaining personality. She is a delight to be around and has a distinctive charm that attracts people from different corners. She is magnetic and not afraid to take up space in any room she lands in. This aspect often promises a great sense of confidence and self-assurance. She has a comforting yet fair personality that others are attracted by with the Libra and Cancer influence in this aspect. However, this aspect could indicate arrogance and an overly spontaneous character. Grande has a decent confidence in herself, but there may be times in which she takes quick risks due to her nature of knowing that things always go right for her. This could also point to an inflated ego and entitlement.

With Neptune conjunct ascendant, Ariana appears as a compassionate, kind, and giving individual on the first impression. Others are often mystified by her, and this aspect could also indicate glamorization and idolization from others. In extreme cases, individuals with strong Neptunian placement could attract copycats. Ariana Grande has endured many conveniences up to this day of multiple fans replicating her style, mannerisms, and singing. Additionally, Grande has undergone many subtle changes in her physical appearance and style over the years–and Uranus conjunct ascendant only magnifies that. Ariana has a unique style (such as the iconic signature ponytail, long sweaters that she wears over her hands, and the long boots) She has gone under the needle before, and she has abruptly changed her fashion many times over the years. In my opinion, she looks far different from when she first came into the limelight; that is the definition of neptune and uranus-ascendant energy.

Sun sextile Mars indicates that Grande has an unshakable determination, ambition, and courage. Considering that her sun is in cancer in the 6th house, she dedicates her core values to serving her duties, working, and being disciplined in her routine and obligations. She could dedicate her work to providing for her family or making her loved ones happy. Along with her mars in virgo in the 8th house, she also dedicates herself to her deepest and vulnerable desires. She strives for material possessions and merging herself with her earnings. This aspect could make her fairly materialistic, but that is what motivates her. Not to mention, Ariana has immense sex appeal, and her partners may find it attractive how hardworking and driven she is.

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❀ her relationships ❀

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With Chiron in Leo in the 7th house, Ariana could have a personal wound or trauma surrounding expressing her creativity, inner child, and authentic self in her interpersonal relationships. This placement is also prominent in individuals who are either entirely uncomfortable or unapologetic in bringing their personal connections to light or public attention–we are literally talking about a girl who made an extremely popular song about her roster of exes. However, Grande, when younger, may have struggled with finding herself in her romantic connections with her partners; over time, she may find that with each lover she figures out a new aspect of herself and her personal identity. She seems to be the type of individual who truly transforms and grows after being in a connection with someone, and we can see that in her relationships with other celebrities such as Mac Miller or Big Sean.

With Venus square Chiron, there is a deep wound surrounding love, self-esteem, and pleasure. With Venus in Taurus in the 4th house, the wound specifically indicates that Grande struggles with feeling secure or stable in her interpersonal connections. It may be that she is not entirely sure what she hopes to find in a long-term partner, someone who she feels comfortable being with for the long run. This could be due to the feeling as if she is not allowed to express herself properly or be her individualistic self. Considering that Grande has been in several relationships–on top of that, there are speculations that she has partaken in infidelity multiple times and left her ex-husband Dalton for another man–this isn’t surprising personally. Furthermore, there is also this itching feeling that nothing or no one is ever enough, or she isn’t enough.

Ariana is an imaginative, idealistic, compassionate, and creative lover with Venus trine Neptune. She seeks the magical and elusive side of romance, beauty, and art. With Neptune in her 1st house, Grande adores incorporating bedazzling, whimsical, and shimmering designs in her fashion and aesthetic. Furthermore, she is obviously musically and artistically talented as well. She may even like decorating her home in a dream-like and adorable way too because it makes her feel safe and sound with Venus in Taurus the 4th. She could more than likely attract musicians, artists, and friendly individuals (like herself) and for the worst, she may attract addicts or victimizing partners.

Grande is an electrifying, exciting, and spontaneous partner with Venus trine Uranus. She seeks thrill and unpredictability in her love life and in her partners too. She may be particularly interested in partners who are somewhat different from her or partners no one would expect her to be with. Uranus is the planet of the futuristic aesthetic, and I noticed that Ariana is fixated with planets, space, sleep, and that galactic type of style–especially in her songs such as NASA, R.E.M, and etc. Her makeup line also has a futuristic vibe to it as well; most of her makeup products are all very bright, metallic, and glittery colors.

Chiron square Pluto indicates that Grande has suffered major and long-term traumas and wounds, especially in regards to her interpersonal relationships and experiencing them in the public eye with Chiron in the 7th and Pluto in Scorpio in the 10th. She dealt with the death of her grandpa, her ex-boyfriend, and several fans in the Manchester bombing. These wounds are truly embellished in her image as a figure, but also in her identity because these events are integral to her and her character. This aspect could indicate someone who deals with extreme paranoia, anxiety, or depression. She allegedly suffered PTSD and anxiety from everything that happened; she also mentioned she has been put through therapy for years, and it saved her life multiple times.

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❀ her talents ❀

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With Ariana’s 5th house ruler trine Pluto, she has the ability to determine when people are genuine or superficial, especially when it comes to her career status and success with her Mercury in Cancer in the 7th house. She holds her loved ones and personal relationships close, and often has a small group of friends whom she can trust. She could stick to a certain group of people for an extremely long time. Her intuition is heightened, and it is easy for her to see who is good or bad for her, especially since she has already experienced several traumatic circumstances in her career such as stalkers, copycats, etc.

North node in Sagittarius in the 11th house indicates that Grande has been given the special ability to expand her horizons, learn more knowledge, and live life full of excitement through connecting and building with her community, pursuing her hopes and dreams, and advocating for liberation of her desires. Ariana may be particularly popular in this lifetime–easily being able to gain friendships, develop professional relationships, and meet unique kinds of people. Ariana needs to learn how to be open towards meeting different people than her usual circle and be willing to learn and expand her experiences through traveling, indulging in cultures, and much more.

Ariana has a water grand trine, occurring in her sun, midheaven, and saturn. This indicates that she has a notable ability in tuning into her emotions, inner world, and vulnerable spots to transform them into a creative talent and express them successfully to an audience and gain professional success and build a significant legacy throughout her life.

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❀ her legacy and image ❀

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With Pluto in Scorpio in the 10th house, Ariana is a powerful, intense, and ambitious individual. She would mostly find her transforming and changing abruptly through her public image, how she moves through her professional life, and her legacy/success. Furthermore, she could be particularly secretive, paranoid, and observant in the matters of the people and what she puts out there for others to see. This placement often indicates that her traumas and wounds could derive from her public image and career. With Venus in Taurus in the 4th opposition Pluto, Grande, at some point, may have felt as though her sense of comfort and security may have been threatened due to the harsh events surrounding her endeavors. Perhaps she may have thought her family or loved one’s safety may have been at risk. It makes complete sense because Grande had a long-time stalker that would break into her home; anyone would feel unsafe if that happened to them.

Ariana Grande appears to be a hardworking, assertive, and dominant individual in the public eye with her Mars in Virgo in the 8th house square Pluto. She is persistent and always will strive to work towards her goals and achievement despite anyone or anything that gets in her way. It is possible that at some point, or maybe even now, she is a huge workaholic. However, her strong desire to achieve could make her someone who is also incredibly domineering–wiping out anyone or anything that threatens her chance for success. She may even be this way with her partners, becoming clingy or possessive, struggling with letting them go. She has an entire song called “needy”. Additionally, her sexual image is quite unique. She is viewed as fairly sexually expressive, but she has a delicate and sweet way of expressing it–we can see that in her songs such as “34 + 35” and “nasty”.

Ariana is partially known for her interesting, yet tragic and well-publicized love life and relationships with her Chiron in Leo in the 7th house square Pluto. Others view her as someone who has endured the worst in losing a loved one through addiction, experiencing the horrible deaths of her fans firsthand, and dealing with the loss of a family member.

Saturn trine Midheaven indicates that Grande has a solid, secure, and successful career due to her persistent, ambitious work ethic and her creative and imaginative character with her Saturn in Pisces at the 0 degree. It shows that she truly used manifestation, her vision, spirituality, and her artistic nature to get to where she is today. Furthermore, there wouldn’t be a surprise if she was interested in meditation and journaling.

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❀ ariana’s fame degrees ❀

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— basing off of my fame degrees post

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Grande has multiple 20th degrees in her chart, placed in her uranus, neptune, and venus; the 20th degree is the degree of fame that is extremely unbelievable that the public eye may consider the native to be apart of witchcraft, the occult, illuminati, or any other spiritual practices to get their amount of fame and fortune.

She also has the 11th degree in her north node in sagittarius; the 11th degree is the degree of fame that is earned through humanitarianism, giving back, and doing selfless acts. Grande is huge on women empowerment, body positivity, and LGBTQ rights. Additionally, she has contributed to multiple charities and organizations in the past.

Ariana has a couple of 5th degrees in her chart, placed in her sun and jupiter; the 5th degree is the degree of viral or short-term fame, fame that lasts only for a hot minute.

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#guxciestone #astrology #natal chart #celebrity readings #astro community #astrology observations #zodiac #astro observations

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dailyalbumrecs · 1 year ago

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Meet The Residents - The Residents

The first official full length album from the Residents was an interesting one. Released in 1974 originally in mono this album is absolutely bizarre and pretty entertaining because of it. The album starts with a very abrasive cover of “Boots” by Nancy Sinatra and a lot of the songs on the first half of the album blend in with each other. The second half of the album seems to have a Christmas theme making it a great Christmas album, and the last song is strange but really neat and about Christmas. Considering the Christmas songs in Meet the Residents as well as the Christmas themes of Santa Dog, their first EP, I think they liked Christmas. Also some releases of this album contains the songs from the Santa Dog EP.

#Meet The Residents #the residents #santa dog #music recommendations #music recomendation #musicrecs #music recs #dailyalbumrecs #daily album recs #daily album recommendations #The Residents Meet The Residents

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houpss · 10 months ago

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Hey, can I ask you to write about those little moments between Chan and Lily? maybe their daily life?

I love your work so much, it literally makes me shine and realize that Lily makes people happy 😭☺️

🧊–Peiring:Bang Chan x Hwang Lily ¡!✥

This will be more like a headcanon, simply because I love headcanons and some of my own ideas.I'm also preparing their message, which you will see soon.

🧊–return to masterlist ¡! ✥

There are references to sex! Not recommended for reading by persons under a certain age

Chan, who takes care of Lily even if he is far away from her. Evening calls, where they talk for so long and talk about their day, small reminder messages, Lily’s mentions in the bubble about the chan and vice versa.

I think she'll sit on his lap while he works on music. Lily's back is pressed against Chan's strong chest, his big hot hand is on her waist, and the other is typing on the laptop. Chan is much calmer and more pleasant to work when his loved one is next to him.

Lily puts him to bed when he has insomnia. She literally asks the manager at night to take her to the second dorm, because when Chan has insomnia, he becomes so soft and talkative :(((

Chan always checks Lily's bag for documents, water, snacks and pads. If she didn’t take any of this, then he will definitely replenish the supplies, and take the documents and carry them himself. Lily's period is not a common topic, but you always need to prepare.

Chan definitely writes songs about Lily! for example Silent Cry or Connected...

Weekend together and with the boys! the guys are having fun somewhere in front, and Chan and Lily walk behind them, holding hands and watching the guys. Sometimes Lily also fools around and Chan likes it so much

There is a song about Chan in Lily's solo album 😉

Lily really helped Chan fall in love with himself, because she loves him so much! she made him believe that he was loved, wonderful, handsome and that everyone needed him so much.

They fly together to Australia to visit Chan's family! ohhh how they love Lily 🥹 Hannah and Lily text a lot, Lily is so interested in this girl. Chan's parents are so kind to Lily and so respectful of Son's choice. Lily keeps in touch with Chan's mom through messengers! Berry is so cute around them.

Lily once invited Chan to have a wedding in Sydney and BOY WAS SO CONFUSED...after all, they had never thought or talked about the possibility of getting married, it was too early for that)

I think that Lily may well be running and jumping in the corridors of the company, and Chan runs after her and tries to calm her down, but he also laughs out loud because of Lily's antics

Stay ship them so much and do so many edits, works and other things with them, but they don’t even imagine that this is all reality :)))

Neither Chan nor Lily like that the company uses them as a method of promotion, and Lily quarrels a lot with the directors.

About Lily...she threatened the director of the company to allow them to continue "Chan's room". Lily took this with a huge risk, but she knew how Chan and Stay liked “Chan’s room” and Lily achieved her goal! The director is wary of Lily on some occasions.

Chan scolded her then, but was so grateful to her.

And the members tease them so much about relationships! and often parody them, most of all Hyunjin and Minho do this.

Chan knows what to do when Lily has severe anxiety attacks. He wraps her in a soft hug, strokes her hands and tells her different stories, it helps her so much to distract herself. He calls her very gently and helps her not to think or feel.

About Lily's Family...oh, first of all, her father hates her because she's an idol and doesn't talk to him anymore. Secondly, he doesn't know that Lily is in a Relationship with Chan. Lily's mother secretly supports her daughter and even attended the Stray kids concert in Seoul in 2023. Lily cried so much then :(((Chan knows Lily’s mother! and she blessed their relationship, which is very important.

HE LOVES HER BOOBS, JUST ACCEPT IT.

About sex

Chan is quite soft, but he is clearly a dom! but there were literally several times when Lily took that leading position

I think he likes soft sex in the morning, filled with praise and vanilla talk.

Soft sex after a hard day and hard, teasing sex when Chan wants Lily to beg and whine

As for oral fixation, they have it equally. They both love it and give it to each other whenever they want.

Lily can also dominate when she just wants to.

He teases Lily even outside the house.

Their favorite position: Lily lying on her back on the mattress (their favorite place is the bed), Lily's legs wrapped around the vat's hips as he thrusts into her.

Sometimes! possible games with vibrators or hyperstimulation.

perhaps (!) he will forbid her to cum, he is so pleased when she begs and whines.

I think Chan is very loud in bed and Lily has soft moans but whines a lot when she gets too horny.

#stray kids headcanons #stray kids x reader #bang chan x reader #lily skz #skz 9th member #stray kids 9th member #kpop female member #stray kids smut #stray kids female addition #stray kids female member #stray kids female oc #bang chan smut #bang chan #dom!bang chan #skz female member #skz female addition #skz headcanons #skz x reader

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not-a-trampoline-daily · 3 months ago

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reblogging her because people deverse to see my horrible habits

Funfact about me:

it is extremely hard for me to start listening to new songs of artists that i like

well unless people recommend it to me

then i can listen to it

but like forcing myself to listen to it is impossible

so that results in me not listening to like 90% of my favorite artists discography

so if i dont get a reference to something just assume that i haven’t listened to it and force me to listen to it

#Ok wait #Ive listen to mmmm in full but i haven’t listened to g&e in completion (but i have listened to the majority of it)#Joehawleyjoehawley ive only listened to like two or 3 songs #Edu like one song #Nat like all of them ( i literally run the nat daily blog)#Will wood: i cant say the number unless like 90% of my mutuals would kill me but i haven’t listened to any album in completion #Lemon demon: same thing to will wood #I have listened to the entirety of dazey and the scouts discography because like its one album 😔#And the rest isn’t important #please recommend songs to me #Im listening to skeleton appreciation day for the first time and its super good 🙏🙏

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swordheld · 1 year ago

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hello! do u have any new music recommendations?

of course!!! going to throw some general pop/indie/rock/instrumental all over vibes at you? these are some of the ones that i've been having on repeat a lot lately because they bring something bright and fun into my days - hope you enjoy them !! 💛

if i'm honest (trousdale) – oh the absolute vibes of this one. the harmonies. the beat. the slow downs and build ups? that ending? it's like easy, slow, growing ease and joy. that point 3/4 of the ways through the song, that building of things? the payoff? those background horns? the drums? i cannot sit through it without some kind of air guitar / drums / chair dance type beat. it's too good that you cannot help it, it just goes so hard.

close one (fizz) – i have been writing so much love poetry to this song. it is soft and slow and serene like light, all golden hour, the soft golden hues of almost, of here, like this, with me? that little 'fuck it' before the chorus is so fun. this group is made of insanely popular individuals (dodie/orla gartland/greta isaac/martin luke brown???) and together .... they are so powerful. cannot wait to see what they create next !!

run (maisie peters) – there is such a fun vibe to this song. that line of the chorus, that 'i've been lied to / i've been cut and deleted / i've heard some things i will leave unrepeated' is sooooo good, that rhyme scheme that syllable count balance? it immediately went onto my writing playlist w/ that fun beat, that synth, that catchy repetition? the whole album this comes off of is so very good too, esp. 'the band and i'? i really enjoy her sound!!

like a brother (hey, nothing) – this song feels like a lullaby, in the way of being swung in a hammock? all late summer, early winter winds? but there is such a lyricism that gets stuck in my brain, the whole layout of the chorus and is just so soft. i feel so many things. another easy one for the poetry playlist.

margo (sally boy) – oh the orchestral, string opening? the easy flow of it, instrumental and light, before hitting that small bit of silence before the guitar and lyrics come in? and then the absolute hit that is the beat of the chorus hitting? obsessed. phenomenal. i love the balance of gentle, light instruments and the slow instruction of the drumbeat, it feels like a whole story that you can experience, the flow of it!

eightball girl (maddie zahm) – i can leave this song for a few days and then out of nowhere it'll just be in my head again, the vibes of it, that beat of the chorus? the layered voice effects? sometimes songs have this balance to them that my brain just sucks up like a sponge and this is one of them. soooo good. i'll be in the supermarket and my brain will just go eightball girllll, tell me how you feel about meeee and it's perfect.

snow angel (reneé rapp) – this was one of the first ones i found on my daylist that was just like, how did i go so long without you. how did i not know about you. and since then it's been a daily listen. the slow, gentle breeze of that beginning? there is such a rising and falling to this song, like seasons, like the breeze? all tide, all here and there and back again, all resilience and ferocity, softness and violence? that electric guitar and the piano and the feedback just makes me want to just. aaaaaaa. this whole album is just banger after banger too!!

grace (henrik) – it's so fun!!! it brings me so much joy and energy, the easy breezy pop vibes, it's so hopeful and gentle and loving. i have it set as my alarm rn because i really do think it'll last through the sisyphean task of getting me out of bed in the mornings, it just feels like sunlight.

#q&a.#birdsong.#music recs.#i have not been immune to the impact of the daylist introduction. spotify will tell u i am obsessed !#some of these artists have only like? 20k listeners? and i'm just amazed. flabbergasted. like they're SOOOOO GOOD????#anyway music continues to be something i love and live to enjoy. artists u have my whole heart!!!!!#went through my liked songs to look for The Recent Hits™ for this and i think i've saved like 200+ in the last week and a half. love it !!!#hope u enjoy them babes !!! lemme kno if ur lookin for more / or anything more specific <33

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megumimania · 1 year ago

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WHY DONT WE FALL IN LOVE ? - jean kirstein

summary: you and jean are brought together by a shared love of music, is that all there is or is there something more below the surface?

warnings: jean x black!reader, fluff, jean is definitely an alt rock/ grunge enthusiast, jean and reader are down bad for each other but won’t admit it, ayesha and corinne win the award for best wing women, get you a man who truly cares, the format is weird my bad

a/n: this was written for @honeybleed’s 90’s rnb event! congrats naj, you deserve everything and more!!

it was another day at the record store, where you worked part time during the weekend. you loved your job, talking with customers and bonding over your shared love for music and records was one of the main highlights of your day. of course there were some customers who were rude and pretentious but you didn’t let that deter you from providing a good experience for your customers.

the faint sounds of dreams, fairytales and fantasies by asap ferg played in the background as you were organising new stock, humming the lyrics to yourself while doing so. you were so deeply engrossed in your task that you didn't register jean's presence near you. jean was one of your favourite customers, he was a world away from the regular customers that you were so accustomed to dealing with.

when you first met him, you immediately assumed that he'd be annoyingly pretentious, condescending and snarky—a characteristic you were used to seeing on the daily. but one day he came up to the counter while you were working and you absentmindedly had your finger ready to point to the 80’s rock section, not registering the look of confusion on his face.

"what are you pointing to?" he asked, brows furrowing in confusion. you felt your cheeks flame with embarrassment, “i just assumed that you-anyways how can i help you?" you replied with a smile, trying to break the awkward tension.

he looked around sheepishly, the tips of his ears flushing a faint pink. "uhh... honestly i don't know, do you have any recommendations?” he asked, with a level of shyness which you found quite cute.

his naivety to music/good records astonished you, considering he looked like a cross between a heavy nirvana fan and a country music enthusiast. after a long conversation with him, you gave him three albums to listen to, along with your number because you wanted him to tell you if he liked the songs or not.

since then you've developed a friendship with jean despite your two best friends/coworkers, ayesha and corinne saying otherwise. you’ve always denied it but lately, you’ve started to feel some type of way about him. suddenly you’ve began to notice his dimples when he smiles, the faint freckles he has on his face or how his eyes are more of a hazel colour in the sunlight—friends usually notice these things about each other right???

jean cleared his throat, snapping you out of your reverie. “y/n, you good?” he said, giving you a once over to make sure that you were okay. you felt your face heat up and you silently thanked god that he was unable to see you blush. “yeah i’m good.” was all you managed to reply with.

a minute of tense silence passed between you both, either of you waiting on the other to break the silence between you both. “can y’all stop eyefucking each other, you’re making me sick!” corinne yelled from the counter, scaring you both. the tips of jean’s ears turned a light pink from embarrassment.

“you left your bonnet and your scarf at my place the other week.” he said handing them over to you. “i’ve washed them for you, i’d thought you’d like that.” he said, the last part coming out quieter than intended. “we still on for saturday?” he asked, his gaze locked on yours, “yeah of course.” jean smiled before responding, “cool, i’ll see you then.” he walked off, waving you goodbye which you returned.

you tried to avoid ayesha and corinne for the rest of your shift but they cornered you as soon as you left work, dragging you to a nearby cafe. “so you and jean huh?” ayesha teased, taking a sip of her drink. you sighed and rolled your eyes, pretending to look interested in the menu in hopes that ayesha would drop the question.

“guys, i might order—hey!” you protested as corinne snatched the menu from your fingertips. “there’s nothing going on between me and jean.” you finally spat out after a moment of silence. “we’re just friends.” your friends shared a look that said they weren’t buying it. “so why was your bonnet and scarf at his house then?” corinne pressed further, and you genuinely felt like you were being interrogated for a crime you didn’t commit. “i slept over at his place, its not a big deal.” you said nonchalantly, drumming your fingertips on the table.

“we all saw the way you two were staring at each other, and you really want me to believe that you guys are just friends?” ayesha added, corinne nodding in support. “it’s okay to admit that jean thee pony has got you weak in the knees, you know.” you snorted at her nickname for jean. “i hate you guys.” you sighed, staring out the window dramatically. “and we love you too, y/n!” they said in unison, pulling you in for a hug.

“y/n, your white boy is here!” corinne shouted from the hallway. you were nervous, you’d spent an hour getting ready for today and you were still unable to quell the nerves in your stomach. you debated on taking a rain-check but decided against it. you quickly added the finishing touches to your hair and makeup and headed out. corinne gave you her thumbs up of approval as you left.

jean’s plan to act cool completely evaporated once he saw you. you were gorgeous in a way he couldn’t comprehend, he tried to maintain his composure but as always his face betrayed him, unable to hide the blush that spread across his face. “you look gorgeous, y/n.” was all he managed to sputter out. you were surprised that you had him fumbling over himself like this but you found it cute.

“you look great yourself.” you replied, taking him in. from the fresh trim, to his outfit, to the cologne he was wearing, everything about him made you feel giddy inside. “where are you taking me today?” you said, hopping into his car. his gaze lingered on you for a second before he cleared his throat, “its a surprise.” he said, sticking his tongue out at you whilst turning on the ignition.

the last few minutes of the car journey, jean told you keep your eyes closed. you eyed him weirdly, but did it anyway because you trusted him. his hand remained on the small of your back as he guided you to the destination. “are we there yet?” you asked, becoming increasingly impatient, he responded to you after a moment of silence. “open your eyes.” he whispered in a low voice sending chills down your spine.

you opened your eyes and you turned to him in disbelief “how did you—i’ve been trying to book a reservation here for ages, how!” jean placed his jacket on your shoulders, noticing the way you were shivering. “the owner is a family friend of mine, plus he owed me one.” he said coolly, trying to not make it seem like a big deal. “let’s go inside.” he took your hand in his leading you into the restaurant. the interior looked gorgeous with it being fairly modern as beautiful ceiling fixtures hung above you.

you were led to your table which was on a second floor that away from everybody else. jean pulled out your chair for you letting you sit down before he did. you opened the menu scanning it to see what appealed to your tastes. whilst you were busy trying to figure out the menu, jean kept stealing glances at you. he couldn’t help it, even when he was trying to read the menu, his eyes kept drifting back to you.

you grew shy under jean’s gaze and used the menu to cover your face. jean chuckled softly, gently putting down the menu to the side. “why are you hiding your face from me, beautiful?” your face heated up at the pet name. “you make me nervous, i cant help it.” you said feeling quite bashful, he took your hand in his, tracing light figures on your palm. “believe me when i say i’ve been nervous this whole time.” you both laughed at that, it helped to diffuse the awkward tension between you both knowing that you were both nervous as each other.

dinner flowed smoothly after that as you grew comfortable with each other again, the usual banter and jokes resumed and you truly felt at home with jean. apart from the silence that was shared when you were eating, you were talking non stop and even at times when you felt like you were saying too much, he looked at you with so much adoration, wordlessly telling you to keep going. you’ve never felt so relaxed during a date before it was weird not having to condense parts of you to seem likeable when it seemed that jean liked every part of you.

one of the reasons that you wanted to dine at the restaurant for so long was for its infamous beach views. the moon hung lowly in the distance as you and jean walked down the beach, hand in hand as you talked about everything and anything. he suddenly broke out into a sprint heading straight first to the water, you had no choice but to follow him. you shuddered as you walked into the cold waters trying to find him. jean pulled you towards him making you shriek as you felt his cold hands rest on your waist. “why did you do that!” you smacked his shoulder playfully, he laughed in response. “didn’t mean to scare you, beautiful.”

he pulled you even closer, you were now breaths apart which made the moment more intimate. “how can i make it up to you, hm?” he asked softly, his eyes boring into yours as he held you in his arms. “i think i know just the trick.” he smiled softly before he picked you up and pressed his lips against yours gently and for a moment the world disappeared around you leaving you and jean in your own bubble. his lips were surprisingly warm considering how cold his hands were. “you’re forgiven.” you smiled as you pulled away from him, brushing the wet strands of hair away from his face. “good, because i wouldn’t want to be on your hitlist.” he said, laughing as he finally carried you out of the water.

#jean kirstein x reader #jean kirschtein x reader #jean kirstein x black reader #jean x reader #jean x y/n #snk jean #aot jean #jean fluff #this was so fun to write #attack on titan x black reader #attack on titan x reader #attack on titan #aot x black!reader #jean lovers unite

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