#cw exorsexism

[lena-kelley-oiar]

She would hate this. She would hate me if she knew about this. I would have been a disappointment already for rejecting the role of a man she wanted me to take on so badly, but to reject my nature as well...she would have beat these thoughts right out of me as soon as she found out. I can't even imagine the amount of prayers she'd make me recite, before she'd finally be satisfied, having banished the delusion of androgyny from the son God gave her.

[gor3sigil]

One evening, I was at the LGBTQIA center for a trans committee and I was the only trans man in attendance. One trans woman told me she never understood how I could want to be a "disgusting man".

Later that evening, she told me she'd love to swap bodies with me (I was pre T, pre op and didn't bind). I told her I didn't understand why she'd want to have the body of a "disgusting man".

She called me transmisogynistic.

Oh, the irony.

[velvetvexations]

"trans women can call non-binary AFAB people theyfabs because it's like Black people calling white people cracker"

white people enslaved Africans for hundreds of years that came with not just forced labor but all the other horrific crimes that come part and parcel with it as well, followed by another century and a half of lynching, disenfranchisement, willful civic neglect, discrimination, capitalist exploitation, erasure, and the prison-industrial complex which comes close to bringing it full circle back to slavery, just to get to a relatively liberal utopia previously thought impossible where all of that is still happening but at least it's mostly just the police doing the murdering

do you

think

AFAB non-binary people

are comparable to white people in this situation?

[heartless-aro]

Does anyone else find it sort of upsetting how widely popular House M.D. has seemingly become in online queer spaces with how violently acephobic and intersexist it is? Like, I don’t want to pretend that it’s only queerphobic towards aces and intersex people, because the show definitely engages in its fair share of early-2000s-typical casual transphobic and homophobic language, and I do think it’s pretty biphobic that, from what I remember of the show, they made 13 (the one canonically bisexual character) a promiscuous party girl tm.

But the show is extremely vitriolic towards intersex and asexual people, and I wish that the people who treat it like a haha funny toxic yaoi show would at least fucking acknowledge that. The show actively reinforces the ideas about intersex bodies which are used to justify the nonconsensual mutilation of intersex children. And the way the show treats asexuality is abysmal. I saw someone on here once say that it’s “funny” that House is canonically aphobic, as if it’s just a joke that the House episode about asexuality actively supports the idea that asexuals are all either liars or medically unwell and in need of “fixing”. Why is pro-conversion therapy rhetoric suddenly funny when it’s directed towards us?

I’m not saying that no one is allowed to enjoy the show at all. Hell, I used to really enjoy it too, at least before I got to the asexuality episode (shortly after finding out I’m ace and before I had ever seen even a single other representation of asexuality in mainstream media). But like. Can people at least stop outright ignoring the absolutely detrimental effects this show had on the ace community and the intersex community?

[punkeropercyjackson]

'Progressive' Harry Potter fans are so hard to take seriously because they'll be talking about 'reclamation' and then their idea of that is.......bashing the characters who're literal traumatized children and ignoring the canon poc and calling rich dudebro bullies punks while claiming they're the ones who're minorities Ackstually

[dyspunktional-leviathan]

If you are a lesbian and are into nonbinary people who are not women, you are a mspec lesbian.

Signed, a fucking nonbinary lesbian (because I’ve fucking seen people claim that saying liking enbies as a lesbian means you’re mspec erases nonbinary lesbians what the actual fuck). I’m not your spicy woman.

Especially with a lot of you very much specifically talking about lesbianism as liking women when you’re not talking about some specific enby you’re into.

[looks-to-the-moon-cock]

Stop kinkshaming people who are into forcefem/masc, you puritan

Yeah, no, I wasn't. I was saying to not make jokes about it without a damn filter because it can entail mutilation for intersex people (cis and trans) as well as gender bioessentialism and exorsexism to not binary gendered and/or gnc folks. Fuck off.

[pet-shop-of-horror-fan]

actually i'm gonna send this here so i stop replying on punkitt's post, but god why is your entire personality just THIS. you don't need to spend every waking moment online debating people on tumblr over fucking everything. sometimes you have to accept that people are stupid assholes and you actually can't change their opinion, and you are genuinely just rotting your brain by spending so much of your energy doing this when you could be doing positive things for yourself. also, not EVERYTHING is super deep and you don't have to send snide posts to random users who reblog dumb memes because it mentioned something about brain damage, because honest to god it's not that deep. and again, was not midgendering you in that reply. i know you're nonbinary because it's in your fucking bio, but calling people king or queen is a funny meme word, and i felt like queen was a more gendered term IN MY LOGIC. anyway i'm genderqueer so no i wasn't midgendering you on purpose for fucks sake. i'm gonna stop thinking about this conversation or this account because i actually love myself (lie) and don't want to torture myself with tumblr brain rot arguments unlike certain people.

Mate, you just sent me hate mail to say what a vile self-destructive bastard you assume I am because I told someone not to use brain damage jokes and I told you not to call me king.

I did not say you misgendered me on purpose. I gave you a boundary and you got offended by that.

So, now I am going to say that you purposefully misgendered me because you just described how you did and you are mad that I said not to do that.

Side note, saying Your Majesty is not only gender neutral but also funnier to say sarcastically.

Anyway, I know you don't care that brainrot is an ableist term but you did just call a learning disabled person that after already misgending them as a genderqueer.

Is that how you go about all arguments? Personally insulting them while accusing the person of being bad and claiming you did nothing wrong then dropping in that you hate yourself?

Note how I am asking a question based on your actions towards me and not just jumping to conclusions based on nothing.

Update Edit: creep-online has given me an apology for misgendering me and for insulting me. This can be seen in the comments.

[raraeavesmoriendi]

fun new game:

ask cis people why it wouldn’t just make more sense for them to disclose what kind of genitals they will and won’t be intimate with on a first date, rather than waiting around for a trans person to disclose that they’re trans.

in my experience, they really, really don’t want to answer that question, even when they’re a dedicated bigot.

[magicalqueersarah]

Saying "testerone is poison" is T*RF rhetoric. It makes it harder for transmasc and other queer people to access (often life-saving)hrt and implies that amab trans people are harmful if they're not using or don't want hrt.

[gor3sigil]

I really need y'all to understand that answering to transmascs who complain about being invisible "yeah but see, transfems are being actively murdered so you have it easier" is batshit. Because one of the hardest part of being invisible is that transmascs are, too, being actively murdered, but we don't know who the victims are, if we even know it happens at all.

One time I got told that transmascs don't deal with homelessness and involuntary sex work and when I said that every transmascs I know have dealt with both in one way or another, myself included, I got told "that's just your surroundings, in a grander scheme that's false". How fucking cruel can you be ?

You think I don't see trans men and transmasc people scattering newspapers and the web every year during TDOR because the ones we lose are almost never on the fucking lists ? And we should be happy and glad we don't know about them ? It isn't bliss to live knowing that if some of my friends die they'll most likely be misgendered and you can't do shit about it. It's not peaceful to see how trans men and transmascs' deaths are always downplayed, treated like it's not the Real Brutal Deaths that deserve to be adressed (and don't tell me nobody says that, I've been in queer spaces long enough).

We shouldn't be asking for basic fucking decency from our peers. Don't treat us as disposables.

[velvetvexations]

can you genuinely please point me to the comparisons to anti-Blackness you say transfems you don’t like are making

I'm also going to remind everyone that that having a cool and edgy gated slur similar to how they perceive the n-word is 100% why they've pushed that only transfems could say the t-slur and started awkwardly forcing it into casual every day speech.

[gor3sigil]

I stg every time a cis person (and even a trans person, btw) clocks me, they ALWAYS bring up my voice. I can't count how many times I've heard "oh yeah I picked up that T voice !" and let me tell you: this isn't a fucking compliment.

If you're ever interested as to why the "t voice" is clockable, from my speech therapist who is a trans man, is because usually the voice takes YEARS to drop and because it comes more slowly, people have the time to adjust their way of talking, singing, using their voice in general. For trans people on HRT, what should take years takes only months (most of the time, it depends on the dosage you're in, how your body reacts to HRT etc), the larynx drops dramatically, and because you've spent years using your voice a certain way, you have to relearn how to use it in a way where it doesn't tire it out, crack it, and if you don't you tend to have that raspy voice.

To talk about clocking in general, even if you're trans yourself, if you clock someone, no, you fucking don't. If someone says their pronouns and that doesn't match the assumed pronouns you had in your head for them, stfu and do NOT question it, because yeah there's transphobia/misgendering but I've also heared other trans people say "can I ask why you use [pronouns] ?" And like... be so fr.

One last thing I want to talk a bit about is I saw some trans people recently trying to make a "mutual ethical contract" between trans people who said on the first clause "If a trans person says something you don't like, do not call them out on it publicly because it can put the person in danger".

And I'm not sorry one bit: that isn't going to happen. Mind you, some of these people who wrote down this "contract" had no issues putting out disgusting anti-transmasculinity shit, and also, if you're saying some bullshit, other trans people have every right to call you out on it.

No, it doesn't excuse harassment.

No, it doesn't mean you have to dogpile on said person.

No, it doesn't mean that from now on this person is "cancelled", unredeamable and don't deserve any chances to take back what they said or do.

It's just fucking common sense. But telling people: "X person said some horrendous shit ? Just stfu :)" isn't it.

Sorry for the ramble but like, we're in this shit together, we need to all be better for one another. Really.

sometimes I wonder if people remember that:

'tranny voice' - even shortened to 't voice' - was something that specifically targeted trans men and like, the whole brand of harassing 'transtrenders' applied to trans men as equally as it did trans women, and our king [sarcasm] kalvin garrah was the main driving force of anti-trans masculine rhetoric such as 'you can't have big boobs' 'you can't like your boobs' 'you can't wear colours' 'you can't dye your hair' 'you can't be effeminate' 'tranny voice' 'you can't have a weird name' 'you can't be disabled' 'a real trans man wouldn't say that' and so on, bolstered by mega transphobes blair white and arielle scarcella

when we're told we aren't actually targeted in any specific way when, yes actually, we were and are targeted in specific ways, but the only people who talk[ed] about it were other trans men, trans mascs, and nonbinary people who were specifically targeted by this trans medicalist rhetoric, and then trans women who stood up for us were [and still are] told that they were 'forcibly transing little girls'

[lena-kelley-oiar]

Was I really born like this, or did I become this way at some point? Did something make me this way? Am I just broken? No- That's stupid, I know I'm broken, but is that why I'm...like this?

[dyspunktional-leviathan]

I am tired of being nice about people pulling a trans version of “we’re still going to call it women’s issues”

You are not including all trans people (either as a whole or of given agab) when you’re saying transmasc/transfem

You are not even including all trans people (either as a whole or of given agab) when you’re saying stuff like transmasc/transfem and unaligned because someone can be exlusively aligned to their agab and still face the same fucking transphobia! And yes they are trans, if they themself define themself as such, and not a cis person receiving “misdirected” transphobia!

I am tired of seeing stuff and wanting to say hey this affects us too but thinking, I’m doing whataboutism, but I’m not fucking doing whataboutism I am being excluded, purposefully or not

[looks-to-the-moon-cock]

Does altersex fall under the "perisex trying to be intersex" shit or no? I think it does with how it gets used.

No. It doesn't. It really really doesn't. It's just the fact that there is perisex people that use "intersex" as their descriptor and it's plainly just a perisex person misusing the word intersex in their context. There ARE altersex perisex people who do misuse intersex on purpose but most do not. I dunno where you got the idea that Altersex is Intersexist, but I suggest looking at altersex posts from people that discuss the label. =/