#curatedreddit

[abearinthewoods]

A comment of mine from r/curatedtumblr:

Feminism/feminist means multiple things. one is a synonym for WRA, a descriptor. (like MRA, is just an advocate for men's rights, its a descriptor). another is a body of academic work (and the people in it), and a 3rd is an ideological identity (more along the lines of radfem and 4b and the others i don't know or understand).

There is nothing wrong with a discussion on how the carelessness of the 2nd is stoking the fires of the 3rd and in some cases inadvertently introducing misandry into the 1st.

When we assign words with negative connotations to the male gender, specifically words that by their construction direct the negative connotation at the man/male gender: (mansplain, manchild, manspread, toxic masculinity(when directed at behavior instead of expectation), patriarchy(to a much lesser degree)) could we maybe be creating or reinforcing any negative gender stereotypes that might play a part in turning turn group 1 into the group 3?

When we push the concept of male privilege, are we not giving people the tools to excuse their bad behavior towards men to other people, who may be in the first camp (as most people who believe in gender equality are) and not as knowledgeable to see past it?

When we blame men's issues on the patriarchy are we subconsciously implying feminism, the force against the patriarchy, can not perpetrate men's issues? Could this not be creating a barrier in self reflection?

When we use a word tied to a lack of sexual conquests to attack men, are we not reinforcing the idea that one's value as a man is tied to their sexual conquests? (aka: patriarchal notions of toxic masculinity)

When we talk about strong role models for girls under the framework of improving girls sense of worth (viewing them as human beings), but strong role models for boys under the framework of improving how boys behave to make them more useful/respectful towards women and girls (viewing them as human doings)…. Are we not reinforcing the notion of viewing one with empathy more over the other? or viewing the other with a highen sense of suspicion (Secondary to that, thought experiment: how much traction do you think a role model for girls would get among young girls if they were consistently praised by the adults for how respectful they are towards men?)

And this still doesn't even touch what i think is the biggest issue. Criticizing feminism is seen as misogynistic, even when its not, so it not only becomes a useful shield, keeping the misandry from being addressed, the victim of the misandry gets re-victimized when they get accused of being what they were hurt by.

Somebody who has started to notice the sometimes subtle and easy to miss misandry in how a lot of feminist arguments end up being exercised in practice will only start to see more and more.

Its a eye opening experience that gets frustrating because then nobody believes you. its either a standalone antidote, which invalidates the person's experiences being subjected to it or seeing it as an attitude or if you try to point out the trends its a bad faith mra narrative.

As for radfems, I don't care about them, i see them on tumblr, they don't rep feminism to me. r/twoxc does on the other hand and the misandry in there is palatable and feminist arguments around privilege and oppression are used to excuse it, including by reddit admins when its reported.

I'm not even talking about the women drinking from a coffee mug of white male tears, i'm talking about the countless women and men and publications that were excusing it and poking fun at the men who expressed their emotional discomfort with it.

How would you prefer somebody talk about this? It has to be talked about. This is a mens issue that needs addressing.

When men's DV shelters open up, who is protesting them? Suing them for being gender exclusionary? bankrupting the org, driving the founder to suicide, then opening up a women's only DV shelter after buying it for cheap on auction?

When the feminist ex-director of NoW holds a talk on male suicide, who are the people protesting it and yelling misandry slurs into the face of the men who had multiple friends commit suicide and were hoping to find some answers?

Let me guess? "Not all men feminists?"

Sure, as a mra who is a fan of bell hooks, i can agree; but could we please not deny or attack the lived experiences of men who have seen that side of feminism because they don't perfectly express their frustrations in the correct way.

[i-was-going-to]

Feel like I found a Tumblr exchange on the wrong website

[retinaconfectionary]

[verishere]

I think the only good thing we could do with the new tumblr communities bs is a curatedreddit community. r/curreatedtumblr but in reverse. You aren't allowed to post screenshots of r/curatedtublr to it. Otherwise, and sc from reddit goes.

[ego-tempestas]

Y'all....It's my honour to announce....We have achieved subception....

[steelwingedsavagereaper]

Nothing makes me appreciate this website more than seeing a classic post on r/CuratedReddit and reading the comments

[kodokudungeon]

on one hand it'd be funny to make a blog called curatedreddit. kinda flip it on its head. on the other hand to run such a blog i'd have to visit reddit and hmmm nope

[unfavorableinstigation]

How has literally no one started @curatedreddit yet

[audhdspacewizard]

I think someone should start a blog called curatedreddit.

[abearinthewoods]

[abearinthewoods]

This is your brain on tumblr flavored reddit

Like, uhh. no.

I did not.

[ego-tempestas]

I fucked up massively, here's to link to r/curatedreddit

[ego-tempestas]

CuratedReddit is now a public community

It's now my pleasure to announce that curatedreddit is now public and free to join and all that good stuff. Still putting an invite link here should you need it