#crackship kids too

[bigbossmaker]

He likes him as is!

[edalynn]

I miss the days where mabcifica was the biggest Paz ship in the gravity falls fandom. Where my mabcifica girlies at???

[lethality-of-dual-strike]

here are some pixie designs (and Cupid) i was messing around with for an AU that's consumed my entire soul. i like to think that there are differences between the pixies, even if it is funny they mostly look the same.

the "nicknames" are what Cupid calls them. Pearce/Ink was a last minute addition but he's probably my favorite of the bunch (aside from Sanderson of course). i think the most embarrassing thing is i actually have more pixie OCs in other AUs. they're very special to me.

[hayconrisa]

ummmm post-canon grace x bam? can anybody hear me? i know it's a crackship but they actually have so much potential if you think about it.

[babacontainsmultitudes]

*Henry and Mercedes in one hand*

*Glenn and Morgan in the other hand*

*Puts them all in the same jar and mixes them like chemicals*

[svtskneecaps]

BROTHER WHAT DO YOU FUCKING MEAN RTGAME WAS IN A FUCKING MCC WITH TECHNOBLADE I THOUGHT HE WAS A FUNNY HAHA VARIETY STREAMER WHO DID MINECRAFT COMMUNITY BUILD STREAMS I WAS ALREADY BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS SEEING HIS ASS IN AN MCC WITH FUCKING JAMES MARIOTT AND JACK MANIFOLD SMACK IN THE MIDDLE OF A PERSONA 5 VOD NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME HIS ASS PLAYED THE FUCKING THIRD EVER MCC ON THE SAME TEAM AS FUCKING TECHNOBLADE WHAT DO YOU MEAN HOW IS HE EVERYWHERE I DON'T UNDERSTAND

[chimkennuggies]

It started as a joke between a friend and I, now I'm not sure what it is bc I've spend too much time drawing/writing stuff related to them that I've actually ended up getting invested in this crackship.

Anyway

HEAR ME OUT WITH RAPHAEL X CAZADOR

Just let me explain, they're both AWFUL and suck so much LIKE- THE POTENTIAL, THE TOXICITY, + they both like poetry and are theatre kids I just know it.

Also, I made an AU were instead of actually dying, after being killed by the protagonists party both Cazador and Raphael end up in the Hells, being more specific, in Mephistar and double punishment bc they can't stand each other at first and they both want to return to they former life and stuff.

ANYWAY, long story short, kind of an enemies to allies to extremely toxic lovers to actually strangely decent lovers bc tbh I'm a sucker for tragic villain stories and these two have the backstory and the vibes to just fit into that (their narcissism and egomaniacal traits and behaviour have captivated me).

Btw they're t4t bc I'm trans and I say so.

I do have LOTS of stuff of them bc tbh I've been having quite the brainrot with this shit, so I'll be uploading more of it in the future idgaf.

[iamapoopmuffin]

Since I never finished giving everyone individual posts but I did make a big Google Drive text file about them all, I think to show a friend, I give you today all my Naruto OCs and surviving fankids, mostly of silly crackships:

Would any of you be cool with or at all interested in me sharing my Naruto OCs?

[gothamite-rambler]

Calypso and Antinous Crackship

Just found out about it today, I low-key want it and this is how she gets him. Enjoy

Calypso: Hades.

Hades: How did you leave the island?

Calypso: I was allowed permission to leave and I come for only one thing... I want him.

Calypso pointed to the river styx where Antinous was floating through. Her ditzy deranged smile formed as she stared at the man.

Calypso: I want him. I know he tried to kill Telemachus and rape that total bitch Penelope and tried to take my first loves kingdom, but... I can change him.

Persephone walked off giggling while calling out to Charon to drag Antinous out the river for Calypso.

Hades: Look, I know you're insane, but are you sure you want that? He's unhinged, power hungry, takes control and influences those around him. He's a remorseless man-

Calypso: Stop! Stop! I'm already convinced, you don't have to keep making me want him. Man we're going to screw every day!

Antinous was dragged back over as Persephone held his leg and passed it over to Calypso.

Calypso: Away from the arrow in his neck, he is cute. I can remove the arrow too.

Antinous: What's happening?

Calypso: I'm a Goddess and you're mine now. You'll be my husband, you'll stay on an island with me and have sex with me in my spacious castle. You have no say in the matter, but I can be... really fun.

Antinous (standing up): Honestly, you had me when I saw your face. I think this can work. And you're a Goddess?

Calypso: Mm-hm and we to do-

Calypso whispered impure sexual action into Antinous ear and he perked up with smile, carrying the crazed and giggling Goddess away as Hades tried not to vomit.

Hades: Holy here, she's so much like Zeus, it's scary. Minus the cheating, but she is crazy... so I'm torn.

Persephone (looping her arm through her husband's): They can be together. Match unhinged with unhinged... hopefully they never have kids or leave the island.

Hades: For my sake I hope so too. Have you heard about Poseidon?

Persephone: Oh yeah, my mom visited him to mock him and he said he's 'totally over it', but that he will make any sea trip for Ody difficult. Lots of sea sickness apparently.

[estellardreams]

🥭Mangopie Shipping Event🥧

Alright, folks! Time for a short notice invasion!

This is only for fun, and I'm excited to see what might be made!

Introducing Mangopie! For those unaware, I've made the ship myself. It's a crackship between MK from Lego Monkie Kid and Pinkie Pie from MLP:FiM. These two feel weirdly right for each other and although it was a spur of the moment, it's now one of my personal favorites in my little multishipping space.

So for Valentines day, why not offer a fun little challenge/Event? For those who enjoy Mangopie, make something for the ship and tag it as #Mangopie! If you want, you can even ping me too! I'd love to see it! :D

Anything goes from videos to edits to art to even cosplays! Whatever you want, go on ahead!

Let's make this a fun day!

The event begins on February 14th, Valentines day! It'll last for the whole day but I'd be most active between 11 am to 5 pm CDT. Go on ahead and start whenever you want.

I'd give out a special surprise though if either the MLP or LMK tag starts trending because of this. Or is at least related to it.

[mdhwrites]

i wanted to ask you about some legend of Korra stuff but I know you've said your not a worldbuilding guy so here's my toh ask instead: what is the appeal of camillip (Camilla and Philip)? I'm not asking as a belos hater (I mean I do hate him but more cause I find him un-intimidating- he's not exactly competent) but it's such a crackship. I'm not against it I support most ships so long as pedophilia/incest isn't involved but it's a very odd ship. Same goes for goldric but I actually didn't see as much of that ship like other people in the fandom at the time did. So why do you think people are so drawn to this ship? I know the villain x hero, enemies to lovers dynamic is popular and how there is that corruption vs innocence and bigot in love trope but most people remove Philip's villainy/bigotry? So why do you think people are so drawn to this ship?

So first: I can criticize worldbuilding, I will criticize TOH's after all, but it's just not my strongest suit, especially when it comes to my own fiction. The bigger issue with asking me about Korra stuff is just that I've only seen the first season when it was coming out, and like two episodes of the second, and went "Well, I like the slice of life stuff, didn't like the actual plot stuff and WOW this is bad now. Peace." It's also so long ago I can't actually give any real opinions of my own for something I found mostly forgettable.

Second: I would bet Philip and Camila as a ship actually has nothing to do with Philip being a villain. So a potentially awkward take I have about Belos is that part of why he may appeal to certain parts of the fandom is that, well... He's the only dude with confidence. He's the only one who might ever put his foot down. Everyone else is either too nice or submissive to have a proper backbone and there are going to be fans who strictly don't want that out of the male characters they play with. Belos gives that to someone for TOH and Camila can play against that in many ways. Either you lean into how subservient she is to her daughter's whims and have her second to him, or you have him and her push against each other as peers or you lean into the fact that both theoretically want to temper Luz into being a better human being but have very different ways to go about it, leading to its own push and pull. There's a lot of good, dynamic stuff there just by base personalities.

You also admittedly have another side of him: The Hunter side. Hunter is your edgelord, punk kid with a tragic backstory and as someone who has spent time with Belos enjoyers, one of the REALLY compelling parts about him to them is that he is arguably wronged in many of the same ways that Hunter is. Someone who was raised a certain way and was told by his family to believe in those ideals until suddenly he was betrayed out of nowhere and found himself alone. However, unlike Hunter, the cultural brainwashing actually, you know, was cultural brainwashing and he took the words to heart and committed terrible things because of it. Things he has now doubled down on for centuries as they are all he has to cling to.

That sort of backstory is RIPE for an "I can fix him" mentality and Camila is the perfect sort of character to do that. She is kind, has the patience of a saint, a firm moral code but also a perseverance which means she won't give up. Who better then to pull out the better man in him, the leader and visionary who made the Isles into frankly a damn near utopia besides his one law, than Camila? Mix that with the history he has with Luz, or general conflicts he could have with Luz, and this adds a lot of angst and stakes to anything to do with their relationship.

Camila is also admittedly the only non-squicky option for all of this with him really. I mean... As far as women who are legal go, you either need to age up characters, all of whom should hate his guts pretty vigorously, or you have Camila, Eda, Lilith, Evalyn, Terra, Dora the Explorer or whatever her name was, and Odalia. That's a lot of names... Not a lot of characters. Half of those people are people most of the fandom overlook or just don't really have a character. Odalia loses ALL of the points I talked about here because PURE EVIL according to the fandom and then Lilith and Eda both have big reasons to despise him with every fiber of their being AND they also don't really have the right attitudes to lead to a redeemed Belos, not as a main draw. Camila is the only one with the right storm of traits to tell more sympathetic sides of Belos with.

And that's okay. There's compelling stories to be had there and that's what fanfiction is all about. It is fun to dissect what romance tropes and the like are at play in a given ship though like this, so thank you for that and see you next tale.

======+++++======

Funny enough: I don't think I've personally seen almost ANYTHING of this ship so all my analysis is just off the theoreticals I can see by my knowledge and instincts. Admittedly, I don't see a lot of TOH content in general nowadays.

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[groovy-rat-man]

Random baseless punch out wii headcanon time!!

I KEEP TRYING TO SAVE THIS TO DRAFTS BUT IT KEEPS POSTING INSTEAD BUT FUCK IT WE BALL (i might add more stuff or change things but this is what I've got so far)

Doc Louis

Hes not the step dad he's the dad who stepped up

Hes got a tshirt that says that and every time he wears it in public mac dies a little inside

Hes also got pictures of him and mac together in his wallet that he likes showing off to people

Im gonna take this time and tell you about this crackship I like. Idk why but doc louis/gabby jay is just very cute to me and i wanted to share that with you

Little Mac

Everyone makes him transmasc, everyone makes him autistic, everyone makes him selectively mute and I just so happen to be part of everyone soooo...

I might however be projecting myself onto him just a little bit but whatev

Him and Birdie are like brothers to me, not biologically but still <3

Pretty awkward around his fans, especially the ones who don't respect his personal space (looking at YOU, nameless women in super macho man's title defense intro😡)

Got called into the counselors office at his school a lot because he was always covered in bruises, every time he just showed them his latest match on his phone like "yeah don't worry everything cool at home I just get my ass kicked as my job"

Tries to be friendly with all his opponents, or at least decent with them

~~~~

Glass Joe

I read the first couple chapters of this fic and now it's just canon to me, he is a single girldad and there is nothing you can do to change that

Well I say "dad" but sometimes I like to make her transfemme just because I can so when I do that she's still a milf instead

Has always had fucked up bones and joints and health problems and stuff, boxing just made it CONSIDERABLY worse lol

Gabby Jay is like his uncle or something

Sleeps like 3 hours a night and hasn't drank water in like 10-20 years, this freak is living off of coffee, bread, wine, cigarettes, and NOTHING else

Tried to be blond, it didn't work on him

The only reason he haven't died in the ring is because god is punishing him for his hubris

His one win was when Nick Bruiser died in the ring due to a completely unrelated brain aneurism

Von Kaiser

Used to crossdress back in his younger years, he may not do it as much anymore but he still has his dresses

Actually enjoys his job as a boxing teacher! He likes instilling knowledge on the next generation

Complete neat freak, trys to suppress it as much as he can but it's always there in the back of his mind

Definitely has SOMETHING wrong with him but thinks that if he doesn't get it diagnosed then it's not really a problem

Probably has like prosthetics or metal implants in his joints or bones or something, idk why else he'd make the noises he does

Disco Kid

I like to think that he does drag in his free time, makes you wonder if him and VK ever talk about it

Can fully SPRINT in high heels, hell he could probably fight in them too if they'd let him

Always has at least a little bit of glitter on him, it's a curse

Boxing is more of a hobby for him than a career, he's just having fun with it

Always makes sure his friends are safe and having fun whenever they go out somewhere

King Hippo

Scares babies and small children on accident just by being around them and feels REALLY bad about it

The first time he met glass joes daughter he made her cry and still hasn't gotten over it

Whenever fans ask him for a signature he either writes it in the most beautiful handwriting you've ever seen or he just draws a lil hippo with a crown, which one you get depends on how he's feeling

Has a storage unit somewhere filled to the brim with all those shitty blenders that had to be recalled

He still tries to pawn them off on people, too, if he ever tries to get you a gift for like your birthday or something you just know it's one of those shitty blenders

Oh and the "king" in king hippo isn't a stage name, he is actual flesh and royalty. His subjects seem to think highly of him and he treats them well. He does a pretty good job running things too but to be fair his kingdom isn't all that big, just one tiny island that isn't on any maps.

He usually doesn't hold his title over people's heads, mostly he's just some guy

Fully CANNOT swim but he can hold his breath for ages and just sort of walks on the ocean floor (gee, almost like his namesake)

Knows what gender is, does not care for it

Likes to sketch and draw :)

~~~~

Piston Hondo

Possibly aromantic? I don't really know and I don't think he knows either.

God why don't I have any headcanons for him?? He's my fucking wife!!!!

Ok I KNOW I said he's my wife but i saw like one person make him and Bear Hugger queer platonic partners and im in love with that idea

I feel like of the two he's the one who was most concerned with putting labels on it and trying to figure out what exactly they were but eventually just decided that even if they're not in a romantic relationship they can still be soulmates and I think thats beautiful

Hes a sweet guy but he can be pretty awkward around people lol

EXCELLENT cook like you have NO IDEA

Bear Hugger

Does NOT know his own strength. He'll go to hug somebody and and break their ribs, he'll go to open a jar and shatter it into pieces. He's trying his best to be gentle but good god.

Also the gay kind of bear (the stage name was on purpose)

Can actually literally for real life talk to animals. No fucking clue how he does it, i guess it's just a Canadian thing

Lost his squirrel after losing in title defense and was DEVASTATED, but DONT WORRY the squirrel was fine

The "i like raw fish" line isn't about sushi, be just sticks his head in a river and comes out with a live salmon in his teeth

Great Tiger

Has at least one if not a plethora of cats (one of which is a British shorthair cause I feel like that's the kind of cat he'd like)

"I feed you, I home you, I give you all the treats and toys you could ask for, and what do you do? You scratch up my furniture and knock over all my nice cups! What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Mmmrrp?😺"

"Hmph, you're lucky you're cute..."

Magic is a difficult thing to control so sometimes when he sneezes he teleports, happesnt to the best of us

It took him weeks to fully resolidify after getting poofed my mac in title defense so for a while parts of his body were just vapor

If i ever draw him I'm gonna give him widdle kitty fangs, trust me

Still trying to work on his music career, the dumbass

Him and don like to gossip together like catty bitches

Don Flamenco

Carmen 100% tops him, I will not elaborate (at least not until I finish my fanfic)

#1 bi4bi couple ever

Whenever he drinks he literally does not shut up about her

"Me gusta mi esposa porque es suave y cálida y bonita y amable conmigo🥰🥰"

Sure, alright dude

I know it's HEAVILY implied that Carmen left him after he lost to mac the first time but I choose to think that he just lost all his self worth and was CONVINCED that she was gonna leave him

That... might actually be worse now that i think about it

But whatever, in the long run they get married and have twins and grow old together and it's great<3

She likes him better without his toupee, more room for kisses<3<3

"I'd kill someone for you, PLEASE ask me to kill someone for you..."

Hes tried on her lingerie more times than he's like to admit, it's gotten to the point where she just bought him his own. She wasn't upset about him stealing her clothes, she was upset because pink is NOT his color

Also I'm sorry that literally all of these are about him and Carmen, I didn't mean to do that

He is a complete giga bitch to everyone except her

I like it when people interpret mac as being Hispanic because I feel like he'd try and start a conversation with don and he'd be like "Lo siento, no hablo inglés. (Lying)" and mac would just be like "¡Oh, está bien! Así que, como te decía..." and dons just like GOD FUCKING DAMNIT

~~~~

Aran Ryan

He used to be normal, but then they put him in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. The rats made him crazy.

Does not know Irish and refuses to learn because it reminds him of being in school and he fucking HATED being in school

Probably because of the adhd or whatever is going on with his brain

Will break somebody's nose if they make fun of his accent

I see folks giving him a ton of siblings and I really like that idea but I just gave him one cause I thought it'd be easier lol

I named his sister Sharan cause I thought it'd be funny, she's also fucking crazy but when they're around eachother they're too busy trying to reel the other one in to be crazy themselves so they sort of balance eachother out

Shes about 6-7 years younger than than him and even though he KNOWS she can stand up for herself he's still very protective of her

When he first started boxing professionally he would bring her with him to get her out of the house (even though she didn't like seeing him get hurt)

Used to read her stories to help her go to sleep and would stay with her to protect her from monsters

Has fistfought his dad and would do so again if he wasn't dead

Soda Popinski

Literally just this post

Him and his wife that I made up have been trying for a baby but haven't had any luck so far

Gained his sweet tooth after quitting drinking (ya know cause he used to be called vodka drunkinski, god I'm so fucking clever)

Is actually a gentle giant outside of the ring!

His wife started knitting him sweaters once she saw him go out into the snow nearly naked. He loves and cherishes them and wears them every chance he gets but he still goes outside without pants🫠

Has killed someone on accident

Bald Bull

I like to think that he's a pretty chill guy when he's not being hounded by the paparazzi but god damn they will not leave him alone

He was probably glad when mac became champ for all the reasons macho man hated it

I honestly don't know what else to say about him

Fuck it I'm giving him agoraphobia

Him and popinski are pals😊

Has killed someone on purpose

Super Macho Man

I'm gonna be real, in my first draft of this post i completely forgot he existed and if he was real and he knew that he would be thinking about it for WEEKS

His ass: NOT real

His tits: NOT real

Thinks he's talking Like The Youth when he says shit like dude and bogus all the time

Also he's like 50

Definitely has at least one kid that he pretends not to know about, dodges child support like it's bullets in the matrix

Idk what social media was like in 2009 cause I was 4 years old but I like to think that people bully him online

Tried to own the "release the bogus" thing but it was just suuuuuuper cringe

Sometimes I like to make him ftm, I think it's neat

Sometimes I also like to make him fluent in asl but I got that one from a fanfic

Mr. Sandman

Comfypilled cozymaxer (at least when he's not training and stuff)

I feel like he would not be able to play any of the punch out games if they existed in his universe

I really dont know what to put here either

I like to think that under that intimidating exterior hes a real sweetie but I also said that about popinski and bb so it feels like I'm just being stupid

Give him some chamomile tea. Now.

[gojuo]

*they* thought aemond was the daddy of helaena’s kids and the dude caused the death of her son (never felt any remorse for it) and now he’s trying to get his baby mama killed lmao father of the year

for 2 years those freaks were terrorizing us with theories on how aegon wasn't gonna gaf about jaehaerys' death, how aemond was the father (🤮), how alys was gonna be cut and helaena would take her place by aemond's side (🤮), how helaena killed herself bc of his death, how aemond was gonna take revenge on daemon for b&c, etc. etc. you really couldn't fucking escape them! oh my days their shitty crackship built on nothing but vibes and delusions and liking the way the actors looked together was fucking everywhere! if you tried to talk about aegon and helaena in any way shape or form, whether it'd be about book or show helaegon, you'd get bombarded with all the he rapes her he rapes her maids he abuses her he hits her he doesn't like her their relationship is nothing how dare you ship her with her rapist you're not a real helaena fan if you ship her with her husband and not with the other brother, etc. etc. screeching and ao3 headcanoning it was insanity genuinely felt like i was being gaslit by these freaks and they damn well fucking succeeded in it too considering this is one of the more popular ships in the fandom

now season 2 dropped, aemond gave zero fucks about jaehaerys dying, instead he cared more about senpai noticing him, he didn't care to console helaena, in actuality he's literally only paying attention to her now because he needs another dragonrider to fight this damn war since he took out the only other one they had. she is still grieving the death of her son (i think? idfk) and has had a panick attack every single time she saw something violent happening in her vicinity like wow such romance! he cares about her sooooo much! what a father to the twins! 😒

i'm 100% convinced grrm wrote what he wrote on his blog about helaena being aegon's doomed and haunted queen and mother to his children because he's heard of that useless theory as well and had to set the record straight. it was too on the nose.

[linka-from-captain-planet]

don't have the spare brain cells to actually write for Kinktober this year, but I am a fan of brainstorming elaborate kink scenarios for niche ships, and thus here is my informal offering of

11 Dragon Age F/F Kinktober Rarepair/Crackship Concepts

*not smut writing - just a listing of kinks matched with a ship and a basic scenario

Drugs/high sex, armpit kink - Briala/Celene. Coming in hot with a concept which spake itself to me once the factoid that Celene is apparently a fan of the wyvern drug mentioned in that DA2 DLC entered my psyche and promptly combined with the scene from Portrait Of A Lady On Fire in which that pair of blonde-brunette French lesbians sensually rub drugs into each other's armpits, which rules. Blah blah freedom, flying, seizing liberation where they could find it in this narrow world, impending heterosexual marriage, lesbo-eroticism, etc. Celene is the one more into the armpit part (obviously?), perhaps this is the first time she dares to breach it, and Briala is happily along for the ride. A fun romp as they do deserve a break from the drama and angst sometimes.

All manner of titty play/worship, against a wall/standing, size difference - Neve/Harding. IDGAF what the companion romances turn out to be, their tension is simmering based on the early clips and Harding just so happens to be boob height to Neve. They may never agree on anything except that beating people up is cool, but they can find some common ground when frustration comes to a head and Harding detects Neve's lack of bra and Neve scouts out whether Harding is strong enough to hold her up (she is). If this occurs early enough in Veilguard, then I think Harding would be the bruised-up one, so Neve could look down tenderly and caress her bruised cheek in a moment of sincere connection that she would then reject because she's not open to vulnerability yet and makes it weird (this is also kink).

First time, instruction/talking through it - Bethany/Merrill. Bethany's curiosity about sex with women is frankly cute and hot and I think Merrill would be both an extremely funny and extremely sweet person to share a first time with. Perhaps they're both left out of the Deep Roads expedition and, resenting that the others treat them like kid sisters, they hang out and one thing leads to another. This would also be part of my Merrill Fucks A Relatively Average Amount But Just Doesn't Know Human Social Norms/Slang agenda. Also Merrill's accent is hot and should be recognized for this.

Mutual masturbation, comfort sex - Josephine/Minaeve. This ship lives in my head rent-free for no other reason that Haven is so cold and that little office they shared is so warm, eventually, when they let each other in a little bit. However they don't get very far before the attack on Haven. Rattled, they find each other in Skyhold and find that warmth and comfort in each other again, even if neither of them feels quite ready to touch/be touched by the other. Romantic!

Furs, lingerie/stockings, hand/finger kink - Svarah Sun-Hair/Celene. What if those Avvar furs ARE the shit and Orlesians DO want them? And perhaps there's a demonstration in order? This encounter would in the Frostbacks for a flimsy reason because it would be too cold for Celene's anemic bones. Thus Svarah has no choice but to drape her in sexy furs and perhaps take a tour of her delicates while she's at it (they are beautiful but foolhardy), and her tough calluses would honestly put so many runs in Celene's dainty stockings, but she probably wouldn't mind too much because she's very into hands and Svarah's are so big and strong.

Rough sex, hair-pulling - Briala/Athenril. The main kink here is actually Briala trying to rebound after dumping Celene and finding out what it's like to fuck with someone who's not delusionally obsessed with her. But also I think she deserves the opportunity to get just totally railed by someone who'd be willing to at least slap her ass in public. Hair-pulling is important specifically because Celene loved tenderly stroking her hair. It would be a mixed bag of a semi-transactional situationship with a scumbag kind of like fucking your dealer (this too is kink) but at any rate, she's getting some quality D AND low-cost fenced supplies for her alienage relief project, so it's a win for Briala overall.

Restraints, seduction, flip-flopping power dynamics - Isabela/Cassandra. So what if Seeker Pentaghast caught up with another/different friend of Hawke, who is less cooperative than Varric and thus needed to be cuffed, but that wouldn't stop her from turning that situation around. Isabela won't betray Hawke this time by yapping, but she can deploy her mouth in other ways to distract the Seeker. This is certainly not what Cassandra had in mind, but it's perhaps too appealing of a flimsy porn scenario like in her books for her to resist too much.

Anal play/butt plug, accidental stimulation - Celene/Morrigan. Allegedly butt plugs were touted as a treatment for anxiety/depression in days of yore, and Celene loves woo-woo nonsense, and the civil war/getting dumped is hard on her, and Morrigan probably has an entire grimoire about the magical-medicinal applications of butt stuff. The narrative of this would be that it starts played completely straight (it's not sexual, it's medical care obviously) but it gradually becomes undeniably erotic but neither of them are willing to acknowledge it because Morrigan thinks she's straight and Celene is clinging to a shred of dignity despite the crystal plug in her ass. They leave this encounter feeling weird and unsatisfied, which imo is essential for at least 1 entry in any kinktober collection.

Spanking, "good girl", praise kink - Leliana/Josephine. Leliana NEEDS to be some woman's goodest girl in the world, and in the Inquisition, there's nobody she could trust but her good friend Josie to help fulfill this need. An encounter of vulnerability for them both as this also isn't Josie's comfort zone, but something to learn and explore together. Actually pretty romantic imo.

Period sex - Merrill/Aveline. Take the most and least squeamish women on Hawke's team, shake em up, add in some vague justification like Merrill trying to help Aveline with cramps in accordance with Dalish conventional wisdom (but also Merrill has always wanted to climb that and takes the opportunity).

Sex pollen, grinding/dry humping, not quite hatesex (resentsex?) - Neve/Rana Savas. Back on this ship agenda, the most important question for any ship defined by unresolved sexual tension is, under what circumstance could they have fucked before but STILL have unresolved sexual tension? The answer is obviously that Neve led Rana into some bullshit and they got sex pollen'd. "Fine, but I'm gonna complain about it the whole time" type of encounter where they're so done with each other but they gotta grind it out regardless because the pollen demands body contact even if they keep it above clothes because it's business, not pleasure. But then a hint of caught feelings seeps in after because it's hard to sustain high resentment for a sexy woman once you've smelled her post-sex pheromones and maybe it wouldn't have been so bad if they'd actually touched each other after all. Maybe they scratched that immediate itch but now they're under each other's skin for real... but that's a problem for later.

[cxtangerina]

k2 is such a funny ship to me, like it's just plausible enough to be kinda sorta realistic if you squint and pray and look at it sideways, not quite a crackship but not able to get off the ground as more than a particularly popular rarepair either. they had, like, one big episode together back in season 3, a handful of major moments over the years that people hold onto with an iron grip, and basically nothing else outside of a plethora of fantastic fancontent and dreams.

i think i like it for the exact opposite reasons that i like kyman, actually, they sorta stand as complementary ships in my mind. where k2 barely has any actual basis in canon & comes heavily from fanworks and speculation about how well the characters would match each other, kyman is practically canonical, at least when it comes to cartman's feelings, and is at least regularly joked about and referenced in-show. personally, i also tend to see k2 as a ship that is kinda miraculously requited, whereas kyman is usually stuck in unrequited hell, which...

...well, this gets into more specific character analysis, but a big part of this is that i tend to see cartman as having very fucked up views of both romance & sexuality that have especially interesting implications when you consider him to have a crush on kyle, specifically.

on the one hand, i think his cupid self is evidence enough that he has a very fairytale, idealized view of romance, based more out of the hollywood movie image of what love is supposed to be rather than anything in reality. south park adults being utter fucking idiots 99% of the time means that most, if not all, of the kids don't have a lot of good role models to base their actions off of. i'm not gonna talk out of my ass about childhood development more than i understand it, but i don't think it's too controversial (?) of a take to claim that kids understand & learn about the world through watching it just as much as interacting with it, particularly when it comes to their own parents.

cartman is a piece of shit, and while a lot of that comes from him and his own bigotry, he's still ultimately a kid in show and you can trace where some of his worst traits originate from in the people around him, even if he makes the personal decision to push it as much as humanly possible. i think the trend in recent seasons for many adults to try and at least appear more pc only makes this more obvious, actually (coughcoughrandy), though talking about that is maybe biting off a little more south park politics than i'm willing to chew for this particular post.

point is, cartman as a character in particular does not have a lot, if anything, to base his idea of what a healthy, happy romantic relationship looks like, which isn't only because liane is single though that may be a major contributing factor. love isn't work to cartman, it isn't about the maintenance of a relationship or communication or all the more realistic and slightly less pleasant parts of loving someone that hollywood doesn't find dramatic or interesting enough to show. rather it's a fantasy, something that happens to people that they have no real control over. i wouldn't be surprised if he believes in soulmates or love at first sight, even if the likelihood of him admitting that out loud isn't especially high.

on the other hand, i think his view of sexuality is greatly influenced by not just liane's sex work, but the way she is slut-shamed and treated like garbage by the rest of the town for it. i tend to view cartman as having a very transactional, cynical view of sex and sexuality, where sex is only used for personal gain (whether that be money or power, likely at the expense of someone else/the submissive party), and sexuality is an inherent character flaw, a weakness that must be overcome unless you are able to twist it and use it for your own (material?) benefit- see the streaming wars & cartman wanting his mom to seduce a rich man for money as a recent example of this.

it's a running gag in TFBW that cartman uses douchebag catching their dad fucking their mom as a tragic backstory, and doesn't seem to understand how reproduction actually works even when kyle basically says it straight to his fucking face. even as a joke, there's still a lot of underlying truth behind why he would believe this. cartman is aware of his mom's sex work, even if he may not want to fully admit/believe it, largely because of situations where he's specifically getting shit for it. he knows he has a father, and that he is (in)directly responsible for said father's horrible death & consumption, but he only really cares about that insofar as it means he's half ginger. sex has only ever been presented through its most vicious power dynamics to him- why would he see it as a good thing, as something that could ever be loving, especially when contrasted against such an idealized, purified view of romance?

(you could also extrapolate from this how cartman associates sexuality & romance with femininity & his brand of sexism to get some particularly delectable transfem cartman ideas, but i digress.)

ANYWAYS. this is all to say that cartman having a crush on kyle (or anyone, really, but kyle is obviously the most emotionally volatile example) instantly pits those two conflicting views against one another, like he wants something that he doesn't even think could ever exist: a happy, healthy romantic relationship, where sex is just a normal thing that they can choose to do or not. this is where a lot of kyman angst comes from for me, with cartman either trying to stuff that round desire back into the square hole of how he views the world, or having his ideals fall ever further apart when the feelings are unrequited. and, on top of that, none of this being actually said out loud because communication is impossible.

this is why i always see kyman as making each other worse, especially if they actually manage to make it into a romantic relationship. i simply Do Not see kyle being a patient enough person to help cartman work through the intricacies of all of his expectations and idealized fantasies and internalized fears surrounding such mutually screwed views of romance & sexuality- on the rare occasions that kyle does show some interest in romantic relationships it's usually pretty centered around himself, and to be frank i only see his interest in romance going down as he gets older.

i've heard some people talk about kyle before like he's the "moral compass" of south park or whatever and while that may be true by the end of the episode, one of the things i like most about him is the fact that he struggles so much to get to the best conclusions. this is kind of getting back into the k2 side of this analysis, but where kenny manages a much more effortless selflessness, even pushing it to the point of being both a strength and a flaw when kenny stops caring about himself for the sake of others, kyle is a lot more self-centered than he cares to admit and it influences a lot of his attempts at being a good person.

this is both my favorite aspect of kyle, that he really has to put in the work to be the good person that he wants to be, and also the primary bad trait that i think cartman brings out of kyle. by being such a notoriously horrible shithead, he gives kyle the perfect target to unleash his annoyance on, getting him so caught up in arguing and proving himself to be the better person that kyle forgets to actually listen to the people that he's supposed to be standing up for. cartman is a fantastic troll and, at least in show, kyle definitely has not learned to stop feeding him argument fodder yet.

sidenote: about kyman entering a romantic relationship... wasn't sure where to add this, but it's for this exact reason that i also see kyman (or this version of kyman where cartman gets worse with age, rather than better) only actually happening in the universes where kyle has lost all other meaningful connections, to the point that feeding a troll to get off on an argument is the best possible option, even if he's old enough to know better. especially if he's old enough to know better.

again, k2 is the opposite of this for me in that i see kyle & kenny as having a lot of potential to bring out the best in each other.

if kyle's worst trait is that he gets too caught up in his own feelings & desires to truly be the good, selfless, thoughtful person that he wants to be to actually do genuine good for the sake of others, kenny's problem is that he skews too far in the opposite direction. i kinda already said this, but to state it outright: kenny's biggest strength and his biggest flaw are the exact same, that he is selfless to a fault, to the point of consistently putting other people's safety and happiness above his own when he thinks it would be of help the majority/the people he loves. this was the key kenny trait that was established by the end of BL&U, and it has only gotten more prominent in the years since with his mysterion persona.

it is in this way that kenny both stands as someone that kyle can look up to & admire for how effortlessly he dedicates himself to the people he cares about the most, but also, simultaneously, as someone that kyle can take care of himself and offer the same help back to. and i don't even think kenny needs to say very much out loud to push kyle towards a lot of these conclusions, he kinda just has to exist and be noticed and kyle has the intelligence to figure it out himself, to recognize the shit that kenny puts himself through and his (usually) quite noble reasons for doing so, and want to offer him the same love and care and dedication that kenny never allows himself to have.

really, the difficult part of this is being noticed at all in the first place. again, i said earlier that k2 is kinda "miraculously requited," in my mind, specifically because the aspect that's missing in the show and almost always must be provided by fan content for k2 is that spark/push forward that gets them close enough to start talking and for kyle to notice kenny in the first place. it's just lucky that's one of my favorite things to figure out and write for those two, hehehe.

[uchiwife]

how did you become an Itasaku shipper, if you don’t mind me asking?

 I don’t mind.😊

To be honest, my love for them really started with my love for Itachi and Sakura individually. I was head over heels for him back then—completely obsessed! But I think we can relate on that, haha. I also loved Sakura a lot because she represented what girls were like at that age and how silly we could be at 12. She had her weaknesses and felt so real. That made her development incredible for me, especially when she grew into a strong woman and accomplished medic-nin. Even though she got a lot of hate for being obsessed with Sasuke, I never liked the double standard since Naruto was just as obsessed with him.

When I was a kid, and even now, I read and still read a lot of fanfiction focused on Sakura because she was my favorite female character in the franchise. One day, I was browsing ffnet and stumbled upon a fic that had Itachi and Sakura together. I was really surprised. Back then, I was naive and didn’t know much about pairings. I stupidly thought people only wrote about canon couples.😭😭 That’s kind of how I discovered the concept of crackships and rare pairings. 

I was intrigued. I started wondering what their dynamic would be like if a romantic relationship developed between them, and since I already loved each character individually, I thought it would be interesting to put them together. I began reading fics that featured them as a couple, and I just slowly fell for them. I gradually but surely became enamored with what could be created between them. I found some incredible stories involving them, including some of the most popular fics from that time on ffnet.

I think I eventually realized that Itachi was a perfect match for Sakura. He was everything Sasuke wasn’t—and couldn’t be for her (though I love Sasusaku too). I can't really explain it; it just felt so obvious. Physically, they matched, and their personalities complemented each other in a strange way. Sakura was like the light at the end of the tunnel, the hope for renewal. She was the balm that could soothe Itachi's wounds, the softness in his chaotic and violent life. To me, Sakura has this aura of peace surrounding her. It’s like gravity. 

Over time, we learned that all Itachi wanted was to find that peace. A woman who wants to help and heal others paired with a man who dreamed of a world where everyone could understand each other and live in harmony? I mean, they were meant to meet. I also feel like Itachi could really support Sakura; even though he was emotionally damaged, I think he would’ve shown her that she was a gem in the making. I don’t think he would’ve belittled her or her abilities, and at the same time, I believe Sakura wouldn’t want to disappoint him. That’s just my interpretation. Their relationship would’ve been different from hers with Sasuke. I think they would treat each other more as equals, respecting one another and pushing each other to always do better.

I believe Sakura could show Itachi that the world isn’t just a place of violence and deception. She could help him see that his dream of peace isn’t so utopian and that it’s actually possible to achieve.

So to answer your question, I think I became an Itasaku shipper without even realizing it. Over time, as I read more fics about them and my admiration for each of them grew, my appreciation for their pairing just kept getting stronger. I happened to stumble upon a fic about them one day, and it literally changed the course of my life. Since then, I’ve wanted to share the love I have for them with others by bringing them to life through my stories. I’ve been writing since I was 13, but I never had the courage to publish and share my work until much later.

Today, I hope to share that with my readers, that they enjoy what I write, and that we can geek out together over the characters, the dialogue, and how much we love or hate them depending on their personalities in my stories, haha.💕

Anyway, I hope this response wasn’t too long. If it was, sorry���I got a bit carried away!🥲