#crackfic (lowkey)
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high risk, high reward
Dnf - explicit - 20.2k - complete
Summary: George can't come. Okay, he can, but it takes him a ridiculous amount of time to reach his climax. Dream pokes fun at George about it until he goes a little too far, which leaves him scrambling to make it up to him. What starts as spit-balling ideas to solve the issue unintentionally turns into Dream claiming that if he gave George head, he'd come within a designated timeframe. His off-handed comment grows into a full-fledged bet.
Three tries, a thirty-minute time limit, and instructions to pull out all the stops.
#smitten fics#dnf fanfic#dnf smut#bets and wagers#we love a good ol’ idiots to lovers getting together fic#lowkey crackfic vibes at times but just roll with it
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would it be insane if i wrote a merlin!eddie/arthur!buck reincarnation fic?
like okay, so arthur dies, merlin lives forever. then dies because magic mumbo jumbo. magic isnt done with them though so 1500+ years later, eddie diaz walks into the 118 and buck can't stand the man. but like they get to know one another and memories start to resurface, and so do powers.
idk the idea was mostly a joke when i grew in my brain. when i told my partner i couldn't stop laughing. but if like even one person tells me to, ill do it.
#very serious but also lowkey crackfic idea#merlin#merthur#9 1 1 on abc#buddie#idiots in love#fanfic#it wouldn't be a crossover...technically
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Lets all name fanfics that formulatively changed our lives
Ill go first: there's this haikyuu kenhina fanfic where Kenma works at CVS and every time I see a CVS I think 'Kenma work there'
#Kenma was a witch and it was a man door hand hook car door crackfic#Actually one of my favorites of all time lowkey#My other haikyuu fanfic is this one where they're on a bus and the bus crashes and they all get injured#That one I've been looking for but I can't find it#Like tsukkis glasses break and he's blind and kageyama lands ON hinata and he needs to get spinal surgery so he's in a wheelchair#I think it was a chapter in a bigger fanfic which is why I can't find it#I'm like half sure it was the same series as the one where hinata crashes his bike and gets his leg stuck under a big rock#Does anyone know what I'm talking about?#If people have authors or links please provide#Also for good measure I'll throw in the one where it's iwaoi's wedding and iwaizumi gets turned into a werewolf#Just that whole series is so good like he gets stuck and oikawa contemplates moving to the country cuz he's husband is a dog now#He's got that dog in em#Anyway all my formulative fanfics i can't think of are from haikyuu cuz that was my previous fanfic reading endeavor#And before that would be blue exorcist but like on fanfic dot net and shit#I could list some but I shan't#haikyuu#Blue exorcist#fanfic#fanfiction
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crazy way to title a chapter
#idek why im still reading its lowkey not great ajsbsjsbsj......... its a crackfic to me atp it has to be . no i WON'T link it bc i feel bad#for speaking badly of a fic lol ALL ART IS VALID i just don't like this fic bc it's objectively not very well-written💔#jupiter.txt#the hobbit
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Writing a Garou x reader one shot cause I fell for him so hard, I wanted to rock his shit lol
Your rambling had caught him off guard and all he could think was:
‘What…the fuck…is we…DOING?’
Reader is unhinged is this one.
#Garou x reader#lowkey the one shot will be kind of crackfic-ey#like dark comedy ish but not that dark
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nothing's more disappointing than searching the suneo tag on ao3 and finding nothing but ******** fanfics where he barely appears. like, don't tag him if his participation in the story is just saying "hi" at the beginning and then he perishes forever.
#same thing on wattpad except its worse there#i cant have anything nice#i deserve actual fanfics with suneo not ones were he's not even a side character#he simply makes a cameo and idgaf abt that#im furious#lowkey wanna write something but ive never written a story in my life#actually i have but it wasnt supposed to be good just funny#i think its called crackfic#whatever im abt to write is nothing like that#first world problems#i should just shut up#ao3#wattpad#suneo honekawa
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dude im going to fuckingkill you
anyways instead of even contemplating who got preggers for this to happen i'm gonna say 1x1x1x1 hacked the kids into existence. why are two of them guests . fuck if i know.
mayor thaniyel is the official other parent because he passionately holds hands with 1x1x1x1 every once in a while. or they dated before 1x1x1x1 got locked up in banlands and thaniyel had to raise the kids. alternatively thaniyel got the kids in the divorce. which is much funnier but less plausible cause i'm not sure how they could've gotten gay married before 2010. tho with hacking all is possible
personally i think guest 666 should be the oldest because he's been around as a myth since like 2012 or something (i might be wrong abt that). pest went to live in a . fucking elevator or something (i have never played regretevator) cause he was the neglected middle child etc
it also makes the children progression funnier if they are custom to some extent. thaniyel accepts all his kids and certainly wouldn't ask them to change once they start existing but after seeing guest 666 he asks 1x1x1x1 politely to "please make the next child a little more normal, you can still make it look like you though". so of course 1x1x1x1 gives the middle child glowing eyes and bug features. i've seen the bug 1x1x1x1 fanart. he's a centipede to me and he should be to you too.
being a compromise between what both of the parents want, pest can tell that neither of them are truly happy about how he turned out which alienates him from the family even more. poor pest.
griefer leans much closer to what thaniyel wanted in a son. maybe he talked it out with 1x1x1x1 and they made him together in the most literal and pg way imaginable (this is roblox. online dating is illegal
how old is thaniyel anyway. bro's like. elderly. if we go with the deity-esque immortal hacker thing 1x1x1x1 has going on in fanon then maybe they've been together on and off for decades. maybe 1x1x1x1 has started to have angst about how his partner is aging but he isn't, and has been avoiding thaniyel for the last few years and having a crisis about it. or he's just stuck in banlands and having a crisis anyways cause he's afraid thaniyel has dropped dead (bro will NOT be pleased to hear about the voices)
saw someone on twt say 1x1x1x1, Griefer, Pest, and Guest 666 look related.
sighs
new family crossfandom dynamic do we fw
#1x1x1x1#block tales#idk why i wrote all that#im lowkey invested in this stupid family tho#might write a crackfic about them
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☆┊YOU DREAM OF ME??
SUMMARY: entering the dream world was such a strange feat.. especially seeing yourself in somebody else’s dream.
CHARACTERS: jade leech-centric
GENRE: fluff, crackfic
WARNINGS: you act cringe because jade leech is a cringy guy with wattpad fantasies + BOOK 7 SPOILERS + canon divergence (some dialogue is not exact cause i lowkey forgot, some moments didn’t actually happen, and i shortened it a lil so i don’t have to write too much)
NOTES: while writing this, it turns out someone else had a similar idea so i was hesitant to upload the writing. however, I’ve decided to anyways. that being said, crediting said individual is still in order since they had the idea first.
please check out @.paralleljoys post here (IF ANY ISSUES PLEASE SEND ME AN ASK, TY!)
reader is g/n, reader is yuu
🐬∘˙
you didn’t expect this. nobody expected this, actually.
jade leech, cunning, observant, quiet, and mysterious. he was one to keep his cards close to his chest and play it safely to ensure the best outcomes. and yet, here we are, in said eels dreams. a look inside of his thoughts, how he truly saw people, how he—
“jade you’re so cool! i love love love love loveeee the way your mind works sooooo much!” a voice, sounding similarly to yours, chimed. “fufu, you flatter me, my pearl..”
your jaw dropped, grims jaw dropped, you can hear idia falling out of his seat from behind the screen, jamil’s eyes had never been opened wider, floyd cringed, silver looked away, ortho could barely compute, and sebek had the most genuine disgust written on his face.
was that you? you thought azul and floyd looked stupid, BUT THAT WAS YOU? jamil slapped a hand over grims mouth, preventing the direbeast from cackling his lungs out at the sight of your pathetic image. “MYAHAHA, HENCHMAN YOU LOOK SO STUPI—“ “keep quiet.” jamil mutters, slightly smirking. you could tell he was also containing his laughter, making your face change in hue.
“eww, no way. i knew jade was all lovey dovey with the prefect but i dont wanna watch it. what a sap.” floyd groans, looking at dream you, real you, then at jade. “i dont wanna watch this either! if you guys are embarrassed how do you think i feel?!” you murmur, hiding your face in shame.
“my pearl, open wide.” jade grins, holding a piece of shrimp in his hands. “oh my, jade you sweetheart!” you giggle, opening your mouth so jade can feed you. idia snickers, holding back a laugh. you can practically see his smug expression in your mind. “he has the fantasies of a trashy middle school fanfiction, what comedy gold.”
silver clears his throat, trying to regain the attention of the group in order to free jade from his dream. while everyone with a logical mind held an equally logical discussion, you, floyd, and grim were too focused on the scene before you. “jade, you and shrimpy should just get married.” dream floyd grins, pushing you two together.
“agreed. you both are a match made in heaven!” dream azul says in between sobs, wiping his tears away with one of his tentacles. “why, what a splendid idea! azul, please make arrangements right away. we shall wed at once, my dear.” jade chuckles, holding you close in his arms. “j-jade!? i don’t know what to say..”
“do you not wish to marry me?” he asks, his thumb tracing your chin. his voice was low, yet soothing at the same time. “it’s not like i don’t want to..” dream you mumbles, avoiding his eyes by looking at the ground with a pout. REAL you, on the other hand, can’t bear the sight of it anymore. neither can floyd. or grim.
“let’s continue to overcome hardships and conquer many mountains together.” jade laughs, pulling you all in by the shoulders. as the dream variants of jades loved ones cheer, floyd swims in and swoops down, attacking his brother and his dumbed down dream him.
“I CANNOT STAND IT ANYMORE!” floyd grunts, scowling at his dear brother, who held an expression of shock. “f-floyd? there’s two of you..?!” he stutters, looking at his dream twin and his actual twin. “they’re mirror images of each other! how can you tell them apart!” azul exclaims, wiping his eyes to get a better look.
“who is this? can i hug you and eat you? hehe.”
“i originally thought you weren’t interested in other people, but you have a limited memory. “i dont eat dance and eat shrimps stuck in between rocks.” floyd scoffs, staring at his dumbfounded doppelgänger. “floyd.. doesn’t eat shrimps.. or dance..?” jade ponders, feeling his mind begin to waver.
“jade! im scared!” dream you screams, curling up in the boys arms. your eyebrow twitches, tired of the humiliation you witnessed thanks to jades horrible imagination. following your impulse, you run out with floyd, despite the shouts of your name.
“PREFECT! GET BACK HERE! WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU TRYING TO ACHIEVE?!” sebek shouts, but his voice falls on deaf ears. he made a point though, what were you doing? it’d be much safer to just stay back and watch this play out, so why the hell are you trying to get involved?! “p-pearl?!” jade gasps, eyes wide in disbelief.
“th-there’s also two of you.? what in the seven is going on here?” he swam back slowly, unraveling the scene before him. two brothers, two lovers (well not officially..), and a whole school of students that seem familiar, but unsure as to where.. you could tell jade was beginning to wake up! it’s only a matter of time..
“jade, don’t be fooled. floyd shouldn’t be that ugly bastard, he should be more innocent and cute. and look at [MC], they love you so much they don’t know what to do with themselves! don’t be tricked by that fraud.” azul sneers, pointing at you and floyd, much to your dismay. just taking a glance at floyd was enough to be able to tell he was this close to breaking every bone in dream azul’s body and frankly you don’t blame him.
“i see.. floyd has been very charming to his relatives and my pearl wouldn’t leave my side so quickly,” jade hesitates, glancing at his two brothers. “i should go. they all really need me.” he smiled politely, swimming towards what once looked like his loved ones, now forming into large piles of dark goo. as jade was nearly consumed by the darkness, floyd swims past quickly. you stood on the eels back, landing a hit on dumb dumb floyd, crybaby azul, and cringe wattpad you.
“I DO NOT SOUND LIKE THAT.” you finally yell, catching nearly everyone’s attention. “it’s no use. we have to help out.” jamil sighs, lifting his magic pen. “let’s go!” silver shouts, rushing into the spot where you and floyd had already began your attack. as the fight rages on, the others serving as a distraction for jade, floyd had continued to land hits on the watered down versions of yourselves with ease before they finally shouted for help.
“it hurts! help us, jade!” dream floyd cries. “rescue us, jade!” azul cries. “oww! protect us, jade!” dream you screams, finally catching his attention. “how dare you! you fake. get behind me, i got this.” jade hisses, attacking floyd directly. you felt your balance falter on floyd’s back, slipping before falling near the vents. “prefect!” ortho shouts, rushing over to catch you til you fell into jamil’s arms safely. “it’s not safe, the vents are crumbling due to the fighting. retreat for now!” he directs, running towards a safer location.
“your carelessness nearly got you killed, prefect.” jamil sighs, looking down at you with a concerned yet tired expression. “sorry, i just couldn’t take it anymore!” you groan, crossing your arms angrily. “you can set me down now, jamil.” you pat his arm, breaking him from his daze. “..right.” he mutters, placing you down gently. they began to discuss different ways to wake up jade, before sebek finally settled on just electrocuting them.
“be careful, sebek.” silver reminds him, patting his shoulder before the boy ran out. “pierce the cloudy sky, lightning! living bolt!”
the tweels stop their fighting, electricity trickling all over their body leaving them temporarily paralyzed and passed out. after a few moments, their eyes fluttered open, being met with millions of other stares. “jade!” azul shouts, pushing floyd at the way with a grunt. “thank goodness you’re alive! i could’ve lost my cute subordinate!” he sniffles, causing jades eyebrow to raise. “..cute subordinate?”
“i’ll cry if jade is gone! don’t go anywhere!” dream floyd sighs with a dopey expression. “jade you idiot! you could’ve gotten seriously hurt and id never forgive you!” dream you sobs, rushing over to hold his hand hastily. “hm. that’s strange. the floyd and azul i know would never say something like that.” jade scoffs, looking at the two with disgust.
“huh?” they gasp, staring at him as if he said something crazy. “was sebek’s lightning so powerful, jade is finally starting to awaken?” silver mumbles, raising a finger to his chin. “awaken.. why am i here in the first place..?” jade groans, recollecting his thoughts slowly. “so.. i am a student at night raven college.. on land? agh.”
“my head feels like it’s going to split!” he winces in pain, holding his head as he shouts. all his memories finally began to come back to him, all the moments he had during the year turning the gears in his mind til he was finally back to his senses. “how could i possibly have forgotten something so important?” he huffs, looking back at the doppelgängers behind him.
“floyd would never act so obedient, he’s much more domineering. azul would give orders to others without putting himself in danger as much as possible.” he pauses for a moment, staring at your fake before shaking his head. “[MC] would have never acted so defenseless. what an embarrassing feat. i was acting quite strange.” jade sighs, turning his back towards the trio.
they had all began to complain to jade, asking why he would believe such fake things. dream you broke into tears, curling in floyds arms with a sob. jade would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little jealous, but it’s not the real you so he’ll hold back. a little. they all clung onto jade, begging him to reconsider his decision before he finally spared them a word.
“can you please not touch me? creepy.” with a quick slash, the floyd and azul clones were reduced to goo. jade looked at the fake you, slightly hesitating at your trembling figure. alas, they were spared no expense and fell back into the darkness, crying his name and dragging out each syllable.
“no mercy..” idia stuttered, chewing on his nail. “he was protecting them with his life, only to end them once he realized they were fake.” jamil states, scratching his chin while replaying the scene back in his head. “scary..” idia murmurs. “finally awake, jade?” floyd punches his brothers arm, earning a chuckle. “yes, thank you.”
they share a laugh before hitting each other suddenly, startling each and every one of you. “floyd, you dare have hurt your own brother? i thought my whole body was going to fall apart. have you no mercy on your own blood? how terrible.” jade wiped away a tear, floyd not buying it for a single second.
“jade leech.” his banter was cut short by the sounds of your voice, your stern tone telling that this will not end well for him. “w-why, [MC]! how might i be of service.?” jade smiles, remaining his composure well. “don’t “how might i be of service” me! you have some serious explanation to do once we’re out of this stupid dream.” you scowl, staring him down with an intimidating glare.
jade, seemed unfazed. he was certainly embarrassed, but who is he to let it show? “oh dear, is it quite wrong for one to dream of their mate while asleep?” he shakes his head, catching you off guard. “mate?” everyone collectively questions. “uhm, yeah. do you guys not notice?” floyd scratches the back of his neck as if it were the most obvious thing.
what the hell is he talking about? mate? what.. when? that’s.. it’s not possible. “what are you on about, leech?” you sneer, causing him to grab your hand with a smile. “would you care for me to show you?” he grins teasingly, pulling you in til you rested on his chest. “hey! why you—“
“enough. you two are more than free to discuss this mishap after malleus is defeated. right now, we’ve got bigger problems to focus on.” jamil frowns, separating you two from each other. “..right. im not done with you yet.” you glare at the eel in front of you, much to his amusement. “i look forward to it.”
despite the topic being held for later, you couldn’t help but let jade’s words and fantasies linger in your mind for a moment longer. the statements he had said, the actions he had performed, all of it made you feel.. special.
“he dreams of me?”
A/N: i got lazy at the end whoops. anyways what if i write a jamil one?? double anyways what if jamil and jade love triangl— *gunshots*
im not used to writing long fics for characters by themselves and i think you can tell
date published: 8/22/24
© temiizpalace — do not copy, steal, or put my work into ai. thank you!
#disney twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland fluff#twisted wonderland x reader#twst fluff#twst x reader#jade leech x reader#octavinelle x reader#tweels#floyd leech#jamil viper#silver vanrouge#sebek zigvolt#idia shroud#ortho shroud#jamil segment lol#twst book 7#jade leech#grim twst#twst yuu#twst x yuu#explodes#lazy writing#inaccurate#twst spoilers
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Hey can I ask for a smutish fluffish matt smith fic where where they are filming their sex scene but she accidentally says Matt instead of Daemon and the directors like “not again 😒 start from the top”
I'm Into It
Matt Smith x Actress!Reader (lowkey Daemon x Reader lol)
Summary: You were finally getting to live out your fantasies of having Matt around you in that pretty blonde wig, but at what cost?
Word Count: >600
Warnings: fem!reader, established relationship, they be filming a sex scene for hotd, crackfic, fluff, typos, etc.
A/N: Lol this was so much fun to write it's so meta i love it. I hope you like it nonnie <3 and since technically this is daemon related imma tag yallz @pinksirensong @deniixlovezelda @targaryenmoony also im tagging @pearlstiare since this lovely dear seemed to enjoy my matt smith fic lol hehe i made another matt fic lol "Dark Kiss"
I was pressed against the wall, a blade to my neck, an arm pressed by my ribcage, pushing me flush against the wall.
I heaved, "do it," I spoke as the blade was pressed closer to my chin, "slit my throat," I chortled, "and then you'll realize just how foolish that decision was after you've spilt my blood."
"Demented hag," Daemon quips, pressing his arm deeper into me.
I lean into him, the blade on my neck presses deeper. I brush my nose against his, "hush, prince," I lick his lips, "we both know you don't think that."
Daemon throws his blade to the side and flips me over, pressing my chest and face roughly against the wall, one arm pushed behind my back. He breathes jaggedly against my neck, "tell me where you hid it."
"Make me," I huff, "you know how," I chuckle, "you know what I want from you."
I wince when he shoves me. I break into another chuckle, "I'll take it however you want to give it, pretty boy."
"Last chance," he warns, "while I'm being nice."
I hum, "I don't want you to be nice. I want you to ruin me."
I smile when he does not reply. I strain my neck trying to look back at him, "dragon lost his fire?"
All at once, I am released and turn back to deviously eye the prince. I bite my lip when he begins to undo his breeches, "you will regret it if you do not obey me."
My heart jumps to my throat at his words. I fall against the wall as he steps forward. I reach out to him as he bunches my skirt up.
I lean against his forehead and sigh when he places his hands on my hips. I raise my leg up to his side and pull him with me as I shift back. I steal a kiss from him and nip at his lower lip when he evades me. When he takes his hand underneath my thigh, I instinctively call out his name.
That was my mistake.
Instead of calling Daemon, I say Matt.
Matt pulls his head back upon hearing his name. He breaks into an airy chuckle, "baby," he coos, leaning into me, hiding his face in the crook of my neck, pecking the area quickly.
My eyes go wide and I slap my hand on my mouth, looking out to the director and the rest of the crew when I realize my mistake.
Matt pulls away from me, laughing, releasing his hold on my leg to look past the camera. He turns back to me, as I profusely begin to apologize under my breath. He is in a fit of giggles when he seals me into a tight embrace, kissing my shoulder affectionately.
"I am so sorry," I mutter in a guilty tone as I am lifted off my feet by the laughing Matt.
"I'm not," he says, looking out to the camera. He points, "you caught that, right?" He giggles, "I'm going to need a copy of all of these outtakes."
I feel blood rise up my neck, "Matthew, please."
"What?" he turns to me, "my male ego is thriving, lovie. What is this, the tenth time?"
"No!" I call, "... I think only five."
There is a chorus of laughs; someone corrects me by saying it's the seventh.
Matt kisses me cheek, "I'm proud of you, babe."
"Matt, please," the director calls, "stop being distracting."
The entire set breaks into a fit of laughs. I burn with embarrassment, wanting nothing but to be swallowed by the ground, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," I turn to Matt and grab his face, "Daemon. Daemon. Daemon."
Matt grins, "Matt. Matt. Matt."
"Stop!" I warn, pulling away from him as I repeat my mantra, "Daemon, Daemon, Daemon."
"Rouge Prince. Dashingly handsome," Matt rubs his nose. He looks at the director, "from the top then?" He chuckles under his breath, "that's what she said."
"Stop!" I whine.
"Oh, alright," he smirks, turning to me, "do me a favor and mess up again. For me?"
"Stop!" I call out the same time as the director.
lol you wanna read another matt smith fic?
#matt smith#matt smith fanfic#matt smith fluff#matt smith crackfic#matt smith x reader#matt smith fanfiction#matt smith my nemesis#matt smith x you#matt smith x actress!reader#rpf fanfic#daemon x reader#daemon targaryen#daemon fanfic#daemon targaryen fanfic#daemon x wife!reader#daemon x you#daemon targaryen x reader#daemon targaryen x you#house of the dragon fanfic#hotd fanfic#daemon fic#daemon smut#daemon targaryen smut
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──── DEAR, MATT & CHRIS STURNIOLO🍷𓂃 ⊹
𝒈𝒖𝒊𝒅𝒆: fluff(🍎), angst(🕯️), comfort(🌱), suggestive themes(🧃), headcanons(🫖), drabbles(🍵), blurbs(💫), oneshots(🌹), scenarios(🍓), reactions(🍰), crackfics(👒), smau (☎️), imagine(🥡)
ᥫ᭡ ˖ ࣪ ‹ MATT & CHRIS STURNIOLO . . . 𖦆
001. TYPES OF KISSES YOUR BOYFRIEND WOULD GIVE YOU ┊352 (🍎,🍵)
drabble of kisses your boyfriend would give you. :)
002. WHEN THEY'RE JEALOUS ┊632 (🍎,🕯️,🌱,🥡)
imagines of chris and matt when they're jealous. </3
003. DOWN BAD TEXTS��(👒,☎️)
down bad texts from chris and matt
ᥫ᭡ ˖ ࣪ ‹ MATT STURNIOLO . . . 𖦆
001. BF!MATT HEADCANONS ┊316 (🫖,🍎,🕯️🌱)
short headcanons of what matt is like as your boyfriend.
002. PDA WITH BOYFRIEND!MATT┊540 (🫖,🍎)
matt's subtle and not so subtle public displays of affection as your boyfriend.
003. VOICE NOTES YOUR BF MATT LEAVES YOU┊348 ( 🍵,🍎)
endearing voice notes from your boyfriend matt.
ᥫ᭡ ˖ ࣪ ‹ CHRIS STURNIOLO . . . 𖦆
001. BF!CHRIS HEADCANONS┊353 (🫖,🍎,🕯️🌱)
short headcanons of what chris is like as your boyfriend
002. TEXTS FROM PLUG!CHRIS ┊(☎️, 🕯️, 🍎, 🌱)
texts from your dealer chris, who you're lowkey in a situationship with.
003. PDA WITH BOYFRIEND!CHRIS ┊518 (🫖,🍎)
chris's subtle and not so subtle public displays of affection as your boyfriend.
004. VOICE NOTES YOUR BF CHRIS LEAVES YOU ┊327 ( 🍵,🍎)
endearing voice notes from your boyfriend chris.
005. THINGS CHRIS DOES THAT MAKE YOU QUESTION YOUR FRIENDSHIP ┊725 ( 🫖,🍎,🍓)
moments and habits from chris that make you question if the title of best friends fits his and yours current relationship.
006. HAVING A SECRET RELATIONSHIP WITH CHRIS┊335 ( 🫖,🍎)
headcanons of being in secret relationship with chris.
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⭑˚₊‧° ♢ 𓆩♡𓆪 ♢ °‧₊˚⭑
JOHN DORY / READER ☆ DUET?
。゚•┈୨♡୧┈• 。゚
☆summary: Brozone happens to play on the radio, and JD's appalled to find out you're not a fan
☆content: reader is not a pop-troll, reader is gender neutral, lowkey crackfic lmao, established relationship
☆a/n: Silver wrote this one!! And okay we KNOW realistically JD would tell his partner about being in brozone but for the sake of the comedic factor in the fic he's hiding it shshsshshhsbshshsh
⭑˚₊‧° ♢ 𓆩♡𓆪 ♢ °‧₊˚⭑
You'd been sitting in the driver's seat, driving Rhonda around [a rare occurrence, but JD indulged you just this once] while John Dory stirred his sugar into his mug, handing you yours with a kiss to your cheek. You nod at him gratefully, looking down at the buttons spread across in front of you, one of them particularly sticking out to you.
“Woah, wait, I didn't know Rhonda had a radio.”
John Dory leans against the back of your seat, arms wrapped around you from behind, “ehh, I don't use it often in case it scares off all the animals.”
He pokes your arm playfully, eyes glancing out the window, “we're pretty far out, though, should be fine to listen to some tunes.”
You insert a random channel number, turning the volume upwards. This one seems to be a host speaking about the weather, so you switch to the next- sounds like a cheesy pop song of some kind, probably a boy band. You snort at the lyrics- you didn't know anyone could fit that many synonyms of “girl” into one song.
You switch onto the next channel without catching John Dory's wide, shit-eating grin, and the immediate way his face practically crumples apart, “wuh- hey, what's wrong with that last song? It was really good.”
“Okay, I know you're a pop-troll,” you start, trying to find a channel with your preferred music, “but you have to remember I'm not. That stuff hurts my ears.”
John Dory leans backwards, arms crossing around his chest, “Okay, yeah, you don't like pop music, but why that song specifically? I was really jamming out to it, y'know.” He makes that smug smile of his that normally has your cheeks heating, “guy's a lyrical genius if you ask me.”
You stare at him, unimpressed, because he's got to be joking if he thinks that song has deep lyrics.
“JD, he just rhymed baby with baby. Three times in a row. Within the same chorus.”
“Hey, it's hard to think of rhymes that don't throw off the choreo, okay?” He points an accusing finger in your direction before pausing, forcing a nonchalant pose and pursing his lips, “Or- uh, or so I've heard.”
“Yeah, yeah, that's what you pop-trolls always say. I think that guy just needs to pick up a dictionary every once in a while.”
You don't actually care about the song that much, but seeing John Dory get this riled up over it is funny enough for you to go further,
“I bet you I could write a better song by the end of the week than that guy has his whole career.”
John Dory's grin turns wolfish, and oh boy, you should've known better than to try and challenge him, even jokingly,
“Oh you bet, do you? We'll see about that.”
—-------------------
This whole thing was going. Uh. Badly.
Your conversation had escalated into another one of your bets, which you surprisingly lose more often than not, most likely because you bite off more than you can chew. John Dory's unfortunately very aware of this, and throws you bait whenever he can. This time was no different. Winner gets one request for the loser.
You are not a song-writer by any means. You're a troll, yes, trolls sing and dance! But you don't write songs! The most experience you have with rhyming is a shitty poem you made as a teenager that never saw the light of day.
You'd started with listening to more of Brozone's music, and okay, you have to admit, some of their songs were actually really good okay. You'd caught yourself humming them more than once throughout the day, and John Dory always gives you that smug look from your peripherals before leaning in to kiss you senseless. He knew you were coming around to them and it was humiliating, and he was also concerningly elated by it.
While listening you've come to realise the lead singer sounds oddly similar to John Dory, just with a higher pitch and none of that raspiness. Like, freakishly similar. It's had you thinking John Dory's calling for you when he's just sound asleep, and the fact you misheard Brozone's “baby” or “honey” as JD is frankly embarrassing.
You groan and slump against the couch, the pen tumbling out your hand and clattering onto the ground below. Okay, you had to admit, this was really difficult. You were suddenly gaining so much more respect for boy bands.
You'd wanted to use this ridiculous bet as an opportunity to show off, or…even bring you and JD closer together- you know how important music is to him, so getting to write him a love song under the guise of a bet? It's a perfect chance handed to you on a silver platter!
But you just can't seem to think of the words- it's already been a week and so far you've written, what? 4 verses? And they all sucked. You wanted it to mean something- you wanted it to sound poetic and elegant and meaningful all at once, unlike those silly songs on the radio, but it just wouldn't work out!
You muffle a frustrated shout into your hands, pulling them away from your face when you hear footsteps, looking up to see John Dory towering over you.
“You give up yet?” His smile is adorable infuriating to look at, so you cast your gaze aside, huffing and grabbing your pen off the floor.
“No, ‘course not.”
He hums, patient for you to admit defeat, trying to take a peek at your notebook from up above, though you're not too worried since he can't read upside down [or at all, you've come to suspect].
“Okay, fine, I give up. You win.”
John Dory lets out a ‘whoop!’ and throws a fist upwards in celebration, smile so wide you're afraid he'll split his face apart.
You sigh, “Okay, hit me with it, I'm doing the dishes for a full week? Scrubbing Rhonda's windows?”
“Sing a duet with me.”
“This is so unfair, you know I hate doing the dishes- wait- huh?”
John Dory looks at you with a hopeful gleam in his eyes, holding his palm out for you to take, “Sing a duet with me. C'mon, don't think I haven't seen you swaying to my- uh, ahem, Brozone's music the past few days.”
He recovers quickly from his slip-up, tugging you upwards once you take his hand. He carefully starts up his record player, and you're surprised to find you recognise the song immediately, since it'd become a favourite of yours this past week.
“You know this one?” JD grins in your direction, one hand on your waist and the other on your shoulder, his touch gentle yet firm, “think I've heard you hum it a few too many times during breakfast.”
The song starts off slow, as does your dancing, the both of you simply swaying together- you don't exactly…dance often, so your movements are clumsy while his are self-assured.
The lyrics are cheesy, all about young teenage love, but…they make you feel giddy, your steps becoming lighter, your heart fluttering about. And, well, the song may not have deep mind-blowing lyrics, but you think that's the point of it. It's just meant to be fun, have your blood pumping and your heart soaring.
“We're grown adults, this song is for highschoolers.” You say, though your smile is fonder this time. John Dory chuckles and spins you around in his arms, making your head spin in more ways than one, your feet tripping up over his, “C’mon, live a little! Who says we can't be young and free in our mid-thirties?”
You stumble in place, trying to blink the dizziness out your eyes.
“JD, I'm gonna knock you out.” You try your best to grumble, but it only comes out flustered with how hot your cheeks are.
He smirks, twirling you around, “You've already knocked me-” his foot slides under yours, and you fall down into his arms with a yelp as he catches you in a perfect dip- “off my feet.”
Just before you can spew another insult at him for catching you off-gaurd like this, he leans in to kiss you, lips melding against yours sweetly. You melt into it, his arms secured around you so you don't fall, the music fading into background noise in your mind. You know your voice will be hoarse from singing and your muscles sore from dancing by the end of the night, and you wouldn't have it any other way.
⭑˚₊‧° ♢ 𓆩♡𓆪 ♢ °‧₊˚⭑
Would be superr cool if you left feedback if you enjoyed it's super helpful and much appreciated ! this guy is so cringefail I NEED HIM. -silver
#starzwrites#WORKING ON VIVA REQS RNNN ^w^#this was already in our drafts since silver wrote it so Im posting jt rn while i work on Viva stuff yippeee !!!#trolls#trolls x reader#john dory x reader#trolls john dory x reader#x reader#reader insert#self insert
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POV: SPIDERVERSE CHARACTERS DOING THE GRIMACE SHAKE TREND
n.o.t.e.s - I'm just really bored and thought of this.
w.a.r.n - crackfic, fluff, and reader being a menace.
p.a.i.ri.n.g - various!spider-verse characters x reader
w.c. - 346
Gwen Stacy
☆ She thought of the trend as funny and thought it was kinda creepy. She would definitely be interested in doing the trend with you.
☆ When you did the trend first, she thought it was creepy like you first did it as a prank, but she was really scared she lost you.
☆ I feel like you would both do the trend on miles to scare him.
Hobie Brown
☆ He would think of the trend as funny. Lowkey would be down to do with you.
☆ When he first saw you doing the trend, he thought it was weird.
☆ He would love to prank Pavitr with this trend.
Miles Morales
☆ Miles would be scared of this together; he probably hates the trend of how creepy it is.
☆ When he first saw you doing it, he was scared, like shaking that he had lost you, just like a picture of you running to him, just saying it's a prank, while you were literally covered in the purple milkshake.
☆ He would do the trend with you, but with expecting, he doesn't have to get covered with the milkshake.
Pavitr Prabhakar
☆ I feel bad for him like he would be petrified to see literally on the floor covered in the liquid.
☆ I feel just like what you did to Miles; you would just pause everything and run to him, just trying to comfort him, apologizing to him repeatedly.
☆ This poor bb, he would do the trend with you, but you gotta beg him.
Miguel O'hara
☆ He thinks of the trend as just plain weird, like, why would you make a video of you spasming on the floor for views.
☆ When he first saw you did the trend, he was horrified that you were literally passed out on the floor, convulsing on the floor. You would just say it was just a prank; he would likely be pissed off at you for doing it.
☆ No, he wouldn't do the trend with you; he is just too srs.
#gwen stacy#gwen stacy x reader#gwen stacy x you#gwen stacy x y/n#hobie brown#hobie x you#hobie x reader#hobie spiderverse#hobie brown x y/n#hobie brown x oc#hobie brown x you#hobie brown x reader#pavitr prabhakar#pavtir prabhakar#spider punk#spider man india#pavitr prabhakar x reader#pavitr prabhakar x you#pavitr prabhakar x y/n#miles morales#miles x you#miles x y/n#miles morales x you#miles morales x y/n#miguel o'hara x you#miguel o'hara#miguel spiderverse#miguel spiderman#miguel x reader#grimace milkshake
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sick bf bakugou, cursing, lowkey a crackfic n word vomit, written at 4am.
bakugou was extremely stubborn.
when you officially started your relationship, you found out that it was a really annoying trait he had, one that sometimes had your hands itching to aggressively shake him by the shoulders until he shut the fuck up and did what you asked him to.
bakugou was stubborn as hell even when he was painfully sick. a blanket wrapped around him and over his messy and fluffy bedhead as he sat up in your shared bed, looking at you with a sharp frown and disgust even though he looked absolutely adorable in that tired and just woke up state.
"drink the damn soup already," you urge for the fifteenth time in the past twenty minutes, crossing your arms across your chest and looking at him, standing by the edge of the bed.
he looked like he was having a staring contest with the soup bowl you had kept in front of him. he glared at it for a few seconds before looking back at you, eyes narrowing into slits as he basically spat. "no. don't tell me what to do, idiot."
"why not?" you narrowed your eyes back at him, choosing to ignore all his words except for the first one. "you literally manhandle me and shove soup down my throat when i'm sick but you don't want to drink it? and you drink soup every other day so why not now when you actually need it?"
he rolled his eyes and seemed to sink a little into the huge blanket. you don't know which question he answered when he says, "that's different."
you just accept it as an answer to your first question.
"how?" you question, moving closer to him and the bed to fix his big, soft pillows and heavy blanket. "do you want me to manhandle you and force you to drink it?"
"fucking try it and i'll stop making you food for two weeks." he hisses like a cat when you shrug, and he glares when your next move is to move the soup bowl a little closer to him. he shoots you a don't you fucking dare look before speaking again. "it's different 'cause you're the one that was sick, not me."
"well," you wreck your brain for any ideas to make him drink the soup. "i'm not talking to you until all the soup in this bowl is gone." you nod after saying it as if to confirm your own words and he gapes at you, scoffing.
"okay, fine," he grits out after a moment of silence. you begin to smile when he finishes his sentence, "don't talk to me, dumbass."
the smile wipes clean off your face and you glare at him once more, but you don't back out. "fine."
you wordlessly sit on the chair in the bedroom and scroll through your phone, feeling bakugou's gaze burn into the side of your head. too bad for him, he was told not to use his phone since he was sick so all he had for entertainment was the dust particles dancing around the air that he could see from the sunlight streaming in through the opened window.
the silence continues for a few minutes before the rustling and ruffling of sheets told you that bakugou was slowly getting out of the bed. you don't bother turning to look at him, hellbent on completing your self given mission of ignoring him until he drank the soup and emptied the bowl.
bakugou doesn't come to you, instead, he just walks out of the room and heads to the bathroom. you hear him harshly slamming the door shut behind him, making you wince as the sound echoed.
he comes back a few minutes later and you quickly look away the moment he enters the room, going back to your phone and doing whatever.
you start to hear the clinking of metal meeting glass and hide your grin when you realize bakugou was actually drinking the soup, the stubborn bastard. who knew he couldn't stay twenty minutes without talking to you?
seconds later, you hear his heavy footsteps on the carpet come closer and closer towards you until the empty soup bowl is shoved in front of your face. you move back and look up to see bakugou's cocky and quite wolfish looking grin.
"i won your stupid game, idiot." he smugly tells you, setting the bowl and spoon down on the table in front of you, smirking in triumph.
"how the hell does your game logic work?" you shake your head but still wrap your arms around his midsection, closely hugging his stomach and patting him on the back with a smile. "good job, kats."
bakugou pats your head a few times with the smug look still on his face, pleased with himself, coughing and sniffling a little due to his cold.
in no time, you have him under the blankets again (—only because he wanted to and was tired, definitely not because you told him to.) but he forces you to join him as well, telling you that, "i don't give a shit about you getting sick 'cause of me. i'll have to take care of your dumb fuck ass anyways."
"fine, fine," you cave, going under the blanket yourself and keeping your back to him. even though what he said was true, you didn't want to get sick and face the pain of bakugou's nagging and overbearing motherliness.
you could literally hear his voice in your head, forcing you to drink the bitter medicine and syrups and eat the healthy food that was supposed to make you feel better but definitely didn't.
"your soup tasted like shit by the way," he tells you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head while you get comfortable and drift off to sleep with his arms securely wrapped around you.
but he had no clue what the soup actually tasted like.
and you didn't need to know that he had flushed it down the toilet.
#ー branded by ash.#idk what this is#bakugo x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugou x you#bakugo katsuki x reader#bakugo katuski x reader#mha x reader#bnha x reader#mha fluff#bnha fluff#bakugou fluff#bakugo fluff#bakugou imagine#bakugo imagine#bakugo katsuki#my hero academia x reader#boku no hero academia x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#bnha drabble#bakugou x y/n#katsuki bakugou x you#katsuki bakugo x reader#mha drabble#mha x you#mha x y/n#bnha x you#bnha x y/n#bakugo x y/n#bakugou drabble
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youtube
HELP I DIDN'T KNOW THEY MADE OUT FOR SO LONG?????
man's getting 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 on his FIRST DAY AHJSHJDHJFAJ
he has two halos now
so I put sunday in lobotomy corp
now if only I could get judgement then I could fully realize that one doodle I did
#lowkey wanna make a sunday x plague doctor crackfic now AJSDJJAS#man just got here and plague doctor is jumping down his throat#so anyways I restarted the day#tuxiatalks#Youtube
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the inevitable love story between two oblivious idiots is like if a shounen anime had a beach episode
#lowkey a bagginshield classic filed under the crackfic genre . love it#i mean there's some aspects of it i don't like & when you look at the writer's fics you can tell exactly what im talking abt lol.#but other than that this fic is funny asf it always makes me laugh so much#literally the first fic that made me fall in love with dís as a recurring fic character like truly#jupiter.txt
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OMG I LOVE YOUR FICSSS SO MUCH
Here's my request😆
So on TikTok, I have seen so many vids of people(Floridians) doing the craziest and and most hilarious things during Hurricane Milton, like dancing to the Earth Song by Michael Jackson with extremely strong winds going on, or doing the Krusty Krab pizza delivery SpongeBob meme when they're literally getting blown away and singing eye of the Hurricane by Hamilton while is costume in the midst of POURING RAIN🤣🤣
I was wondering how the LaDS boys would react/what they would do if they saw a video on social media of the reader/MC at their home(since it would be too dangerous to go out because there's a LITERAL HURRICANE) were the reader/MC does something similar, like there was a really strong hurricane with strong winds and flooding and the reader/MC goes on something that dangerous but funny then posts it??
uhhhh ngl im not super into crackfic stuff and this is like?? bordering but ive seen those videos and lowkey they are hilarious couldnt be me though extreme weather makes me very anxious
i dont really have much to say for it though but this uhhh
He is not happy to see you risking your life like that. Honestly, if the weather event was that extreme he would be home, with you - except for Zayne. He's at work but he's calling you any chance he gets. Even if it's for a funny video he'd tell you to get back inside and that it's far too dangerous for you to be playing like that. Honestly, it'd be strange if you guys weren't already evacuated, him prioritizing your safety above all else.
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