#control and absolutely do not understand
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Ludinus is a child. He's a thousand year old child who never moved past his anger at the Gods for being flawed but powerful. He doesn't want to kill the gods because Exandria would be better without them. He doesn't want to kill the gods because they're capricious.
He wants to kill the gods because he had a shitty childhood and the gods were who he could blame, and then he never grew up and let that go.
#cr spoilers#it's just fucking sad#like you've been alive longer than basically everyone else on the planet and instead of trying to make the world better you've clung to you#petty childish grievances to the point that you're willing to burn everything down if it means you can get what you want#the destruction of Molaesmyr should have been a wake up call and yet here we are with you still fucking around with things you can't hope t#control and absolutely do not understand
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Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Sorry to everyone who was looking forwards to this comic only to find out I put WWX in the ugliest outfit.#Continuity came first. Plus let's be honest; he did *not* show up in anything fancy. Or in all black as seen in most fanart.#We are at the middle of WWX depression arc. His self-care was 100% because Jin Yanli would be sad if he didn't try to look nice.#Okay okay. Fine I've delayed talking about the kiss long enough.#It is absolutely a core LWJ scene over a WWX scene. Which is made even more fascinating because we don't get his POV.#But we get so many insights! His loss of control and his firmness all contrasted against how he trembles.#And all of that wrapped up in a wonderful self-loathing bow! You go Lan Zhan! You hated yourself so much for this!#WWX is a hilarious narrator for this because he is truly just...baffled by what's going on.#He would push the person away but he doesn't want to hurt their feelings or pride (putting other people first again are we?)#I do understand why this one is divisive for people though. I choose to look at it through a character/humourous lens.#I've seen people defend and admonish this scene as a particularly shitty thing LWJ did and let's be very clear here: It was.#That's why I like it. LWJ did a shitty thing and struggles with it. It's part of what makes him so robust as a character.#It's also fine if you enjoy this scene for it's eroticism. You're not a bad person for that. You are just A Person.#People will have their own experiences with this topic. Be kind to each other alright?
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Can’t believe I have to say this but birth control cannot give you PCOS. PCOS has genetic and environmental factors that have nothing to do w BC. Researchers can predict the later development of PCOS from biomarkers present when you’re a baby. If you went on birth control as a teenager and then just recently went off it as an adult and started having PCOS symptoms it’s bc birth control is often used to treat PCOS. It was just masking the PCOS that whole time, and you were relatively young when you first started taking it, so your symptoms hadn’t become obvious yet.
Not that hormones can’t have a huge impact on health, but you should be wary when any woman starts talking about how birth control “ruined her body” bc even if she’s telling the truth there’s a good chance that she actually has a serious underlying health condition that became more apparent by either stopping or starting birth control. It does not mean birth control itself is evil. The problem is the lack of research into health conditions that affect women and how they affect women. It’s not that your woman-body is so wild and unpredictable that there’s no telling what some mysterious female hormones could do to you.
Also not all hormonal birth control is going to affect your body the same anyway. People tend to have very different reactions to high estrogen and low estrogen pills respectively, for example (including myself). It’s completely understandable to be wary of how stopping/starting the pill could affect your body, but keep in mind that most of the changes actually triggered by that would be a. temporary and b. could be managed by switching to another form of birth control or adding a separate medication or treatment to manage symptoms if you really need to be on that specific form of it.
#like medical science has absolutely failed women & people w ovaries uteruses etc#but you also shouldn’t give in to anti-science logic about how your body works#don’t do their job for them. you deserve better. you deserve concrete information and a robust understanding of your biology.#birth control#PCOS
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It’s just…so painful to watch Armand readily submit in order to obtain the love he so desperately craves. And while it’s most assuredly a manipulative tactic, it’s still one borne out of fear and desperation. He cannot lose this person he’s come to love and so will become whatever they want, do whatever they want just so they’ll stay with him. But it won’t be enough. No matter how much he acquiesces or seeks to control (himself, others, the environment), he won’t be able to make Louis stay with him in the perfect life, perfect self he built in the hopes of finally being loved. It will all crumble with Armand left alone in the rubble of what he created, the author of his own abandonment.
#this unfortunately hits way too close to home for me#let’s not even get into Claudia’s anger at never being enough#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire#armand#this is just me speaking from personal experience…but there is definite manipulation at play here from Armand#and I don’t necessarily mean that pejoratively- when you’re desperate for people to like/love you you’ll become whatever they want#or whatever you think they’d want and you give it to them so they’ll want to keep you around#I’ve done it so often with the people in my life- and make no mistake it’s also a survival tactic#you give someone what they want they won’t hurt you#and when that’s how you survive for years and years it becomes the default method of interacting with others#even with normal people who genuinely mean you no harm you revert to that people pleasing mode#as a means of control both external and internal#this is what i see armand doing- his way of surviving that he’s never truly broken out of#armand ceding coven control to Louis and curating the Dubai penthouse for Louis are part of the same pattern of behavior#and even tho it’s ultimately harmful and will only end badly for armand and Louis’ relationship#idk if armand knows how to not exist that way with someone he loves/desires#all of this also ties into louis and daniel#because of course Armand will lose it over Louis finding connection and interest with someone else aside from him#someone HUMAN no less#and I can see Armand taking out his anger on Daniel as a way of expressing his own frustration at still not being enough for Louis#breaking daniel’s mind in a desperate attempt to understand why this human could reach Louis in ways he couldn’t#not saying any of this to excuse Armand and his behavior obviously (I’m very upset and worried over the trial looming on the horizon)#but I do understand this impulse and how you’ll throw ANYONE under the bus in order to preserve your place with loved ones#it’s all horrifying but unfortunately I empathize#like even if Louis is right to walk out on him when he learns/remembers the truth of what happened to Claudia#I’ll probably still find myself saddened by Armand’s fate because I’ve absolutely been there myself#it’s a tragedy of his own making- his fear and desperation birthing manipulative and controlling behaviors#that ultimately result in your own abandonment#god this fucking show
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Honestly the worst thing about being raised by and around professors is that I can't really do the whole students bitching about professors thing even when I mostly agree with it, because my whole life I have been hearing the professor's side of the story. Every time someone talks about how ridiculous mandatory attendance or participation is there's a part of me that starts loudly protesting about how actually being in class is really important for learning, and it must be so hugely frustrating for the professor when students just don't show up to your class half the time and then when they do show up they're playing sudoku on their computer.
#dylan says things#and I say this as someone who historically has not been great about attendance due to things both in and outside of my control#and I know disabilities are a factor for a lot of people and I'm not saying they shouldn't be accommodated.#but I've had professors who have done truly so much to make it possible to attend their class. like you can go in person and on zoom#and a lotta wiggle room for making up missed classes#and people will still complain about it#and most of the time these things are only like 5-10% of your grade#and at a certain point it's like dude you're literally paying to go to school#and now you're complaining that you have to go to school and do school things#if you stop giving them all your money they will stop asking you do the thing you're paying to do#and again I am not exempt from this getting to my morning class is fucking impossible a lot of the time#and that sudoku thing in the main post was absolutely a self-callout#but like. idk. Professors are not evil they are people who are trying to do their jobs#anyways. I think I often find that my attitude towards academia is not aligned with my friends#like sometimes people will tell me that it doesn't really matter that much as long as i graduate#and I understand the sentiment and largely agree with it but also at the end of the day I want to like. Learn stuff and do good work#anyways. sorry for my weird rambling i just have a lot of thoughts about university that i never really share with anyone
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Re the rabid skunk
I’m from a country town and while it’s not something I was taught in school, I was definitely taught by my parents and other adults in my life to report possibly rabid or sick animals. There is some worry about rabies and other diseases diseases rising in the wildlife population so the forest service try to stay on top of it.
It’s a little messed up that no one was taking your concern seriously. Even if it was just a weird skunk, rabies and other animal diseases are no joke and pose a threat to people and other animals.
Thank you! It's very...idk the word. Affirming? Good to know it's not just me that thinks it's like a responsibility to report potentially rabid animals, like it's just a thing you do
#ask away!#for anyone who missed my post about this yesterday#there was a skunk in my yard behaving very weird yesterday#out in bright daylight running full speed in a giant circle not being chased not looking for food#found a hiding place (under the shed in my yard) but did not stay there#came from the center of the neighborhood (away from forest not good for skunks)#ran towards forest then veered away back towards houses#so I tried to call to report the skunk to animal control in case it was rabies (or another potentially zoonotic disease)#and there just! is no animal control! where I live!#absolutely no governmental involvement AT ALL#and the private companies only handle stray pets not wildlife!#which is wild to me#what is government for if not to try to control rabies#like I understand that is not the central purpose of government but I do feel like it should at least be on the radar
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adult wins, adult anxieties and fears and frozenness.
#I take my responsibilities so seriously and I take my work so seriously and so consequently myself so seriously#and that last one I need to not do#it doesn’t all come down on me. I am not in charge of everything or in control of everything#anyways I’ve just been absolutely wrestling these past few weeks with my internal landscape#if that makes sense#but it’s this thing where I just feel full of layers of deception#to other people because no matter who I’m talking to there’s something they don’t understand about me.#and this part of my brain goes insane when I’m tired and stressed and empty#and I have simply been doing so much non-stop#that I am due for a crash and a rest#unfortunately my brain also loves to torment me when I am tired and stressed#(it’s because of the tiredness and stress)#not a thought here is coherent or connected#but I need to rest and recharge#it’s like I keep finding new aspects of me that i can push harder. increased stamina. mental strength. more Finely honed observations#so I’ve just been doing it (everything life teaching conversations existing) at a much higher rate of intensity#and productivity#but the exhaustion this produces is new to me and it’s very scary and idk what to do with it#(rest. change my metaphorical tires. sleep. recharge)#anyway ignore me
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i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point
#and then you just have to get up and keep living anyway because what else is there to do?#but man my heart keeps feeling heavier with every blow#2024 has literally been the worst year ever god personally too#like everytime i think it can't possibly get worse than this it does#i remember literally 9th jan i had such a horrible breakdown in an auto because the first friend i ever made#after school was leaving my work and therefore my life#9 days into the year. seriously. and i was so happy on 8th because it was my birthday#i don't know im trying hard to think okay this doesn't even affect me it's fine im privileged enough that even my own countrys politics#barely affects me#but just. india is already so behind in everything. if developed nations are doing shit like this then well#it will never get better right like who do we even strive to be#i want to get more into indian politics but my god. it's so horrifying and depressing all the time#like i remember resolving to follow politics closely few years ago and the first news#i read was about some minister talking about how girls skirts lengths IN SCHOOL is the reason boys do sa and boys will be boys etc etc#i know i could just follow business news stuff like that god knows it'll help in my field but it just. doesn't resonate with me doesn't#make me feel anything at all. like i so desperately want to care about ooh stock markets and how to grow your money etc etc#but when i think about being rich enough to invest idle money all i can think is sitting in my own home peacefully#drinking a glass of cold coffee and just being able to breathe freely because me and my sister used to joke in childhood#when dad went thru a coffee v bad for health phase and he wouldn't let us drink it so we would drink it very sneakily#at night when he was asleep or went out for an hour and make absolutely no noise while mixing the sugar. we said that we know#we'll* know we have achieved true freedom and happiness in life when we can peacefully drink cold coffee in the hall and not secretly#in the dead of night in our room#i don't even know what im talking about and my period is late again and nothing is working and my lazer focus#that i had built in the past few weeks is gone because suddenly im like what is the point????#i just don't understand how the fuck humans can fight over stupid fucking things like who is kissing who and who is doing what with their#body instead of focusing on collective issues like our planet is dying so fucking fast and every summer is getting impossibler to survive#i hate that the united states control the UN fuck this world fr man i hate being born in such horrible helpless times#like call me a kid or dumb or whatever but i cannot understand how MILLIONS of people do not#have sympathy for ppl around them and who don't care about the planet at all like how????? how did you grow up????#not trying to boast but this is so natural to me!!! didn't you make save water save earth posters in school!!! didn't anyone
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I just came across your post about vagueposting and I think I agree with it, but the situation you most likely wrote it about is hardly a "vagueposting" because you could say who it was about after reading it literally one time and that person got jumped and insulted in the anon ask anyway so discussing it in person could be safer...
I'm reeeally sorry for bring up a past situation, but I don't think it's a good idea to write nasty things about another person and specific details about how they interact with the fandom and their post, say things that will help to easily identify a person and at the same time insult them or say how you think they feel about the characters or the story based on your feelings about their one take that you didn't like and then call it's "vague" because there is no name in the post. I mean, It can lead to bad consequences, it literally did in that situation.
And yes, I do think people have the right to discuss bad takes or takes they don't like, but there's a way to do it without giving away every detail about the post and the person who wrote it so everyone knows who you're talking about, and if you're not good at being vague, just discuss it in a private chat.
this ask is old but i was busy last week, so forgive me for the late response. i was debating answering it at all, but i dont want myself to be misunderstood, so just. to clarify under the cut.
i'll agree with you that the post/situation in question wasn't vagueing. now, i don't know exactly the difference between the number of followers i have and the number of followers that the blogger in question has, and when it comes to the number of active dsmp followers i think both of us have even less of a clue. that being said, both of us frequent much of the same circles, so i think it's fair to say that many of my posts will end up being exposed to a very similar audience to his, and so therefore this response about the situation you're talking about will be just about as clearly traceable to a specific person as the post he made that started the situation in question. just as a general observation.
if i'm understanding your ask correctly, while vagueing a take is fine, the vague shouldn't be clearly identifiable if you're going to speak badly about it or disagree heavily. to which i have to ask what, specifically, is defined as clearly identifiable? i think most takes in this fandom can be pretty easily traced to a person, even if that person is not the only person that believes in that take--just as an example, c!tommy as a butterfly pinned behind glass was a take in response to the c!sam and c!dream stream after techno escaped, and grew to be a pretty prominent theme to the point of a zine being modeled after it, but i can also trace it to a pretty specific tumblr post with a name attached. i also think that that same statement probably isn't true for many fans who maybe joined later on in the fandom. i mean, i'm aware that i'm being pedantic here, i'm aware that the situation in question created conflict specifically due to it being within dreblr and in a space where multiple people would've seen both posts and felt ensuing awkwardness bc they know both people either on a personal or acquaintance level, but i mean the same applied ages ago whenever strategist-interpretation and trauma-interpretation c!dream apologists felt like going at it again on the dash.
in this scenario specifically, what made the situation clearly identifiable was the nature of the take that was being discussed. the main identifying detail was the take that the asker was asked about, imo, and i mean ... yeah i mean. most takes that haven't blown up pretty heavily do end up being tied to one or two people? i mean, staged finale is a take that can be tied to three people who argued in favor of it the most before the rest of dreblr got on board only in late 2021. i simply don't think that a take that maybe only one person has argued for (which, i dont remember the statistics of the take in this situation, so i dont remember how many notes it had or how many people in total may have expressed public agreement towards it, honestly) is exempt from discussion when it is posted in a meta or analysis space as an analytical piece, which i do think applies to this take from what i remember about it and how it was tagged.
and back to the discussion of what's acceptable as far as directly responding versus vagueing, i mean, a lot of the discussion i've had on my blog (abt discourse etiquette in General in meta spaces on dreblr moreso than this specific situation, largely bc i did want to avoid commenting on a situation that 1) i really had no business in and 2) i have reason to be biased about. the main reason why i'm talking abt it now is bc hopefully enough time has passed for feelings to be less fraught and bc i want to make certain thoughts of mine clear, in case they weren't clear enough in my original posts abt dreblr and whatever) revolves around both direct responses and vagueing having their reasons as well as pros and cons, and both will likely continue to exist in analysis spaces and generally i don't think it's productive to really comment on what people can or can't do on their own blogs. in this scenario, i don't think "vagueing about one specific person in a way that may be clearly identifiable to parts of their audience" is uniquely unacceptable? a direct response very clearly would make the person in question identifiable -- outside of how it's kind of impossible to make a post vagueing someone in a way where No One has Any Idea who you might be talking about without making the post like, incoherent inherently, if vagueing (not identifiable) is okay and directly responding (identifiable) is okay, then why is vagueing (identifiable) not okay?
now, i understand that any situation where the person in question might be identifiable, some people may take the open disagreement as permission to harass them. and obviously, harassment sucks. part of the whole point of opening up this conversation on my blog was bc i worry, with the way that a single conflict between dsmp opinions has kind of rippled through dreblr recently and the responses to this "situation," that an environment is being created with too much of a forced global consensus that punishes people for stepping out of the status quo in both opinions and behavior, which is obviously bad for the whole community, and was looking to voice some of that and have a conversation on solutions. and i understand that in this situation, a lot of your problem with the blogger has to do with his general attitude in discussing the take and his statements on the person who made it. now, i think you have every right to find his statements offensive and disagreeable and to unfollow and/or block him. that being said, i am not exactly a PR agent, and i want to reiterate that what people do on their own blogs isn't my business and i don't think it should be my business. or uh, anyone's business, for that matter. i don't think that everyone "in dreblr" is beholden to keeping to a certain person's standard for "acceptable" disagreement and "acceptable" sharing of their own opinions on their own blog as long as they're not inciting harassment, which entails, like, actively encouraging harm to happen yk. i mean, you can think that the blogger was being rude or an asshole and prefer to never see him again, that's fine. that's your prerogative. but i mean, i'm not gonna tell the guy how to interact with the fandom on his own blog, haha.
to be clear, im not telling you what you can or can't do on your own blog either. if you wanna make a post about how his posts contain harmful rhetoric, how he's an idiot, or how he's rude bc you disagree with his public posts on this situation or on the dsmp as a whole, i mean, i'm not gonna handwring over it and tell you that you're not allowed to do that. it's none of my business, and i like to think i'm not that hypocritical. and honestly, i think that in a space where we're talking about analysis, commenting on harmful rhetoric happens often and should happen often when it happens -- literally anyone can make an analysis post that has harmful rhetoric, and sure it's fiction and no one has to answer to the analysis police for making a bad analysis post, but i've also been in this space and seen enough truly mind-boggling amounts of parroting takes about torture that make people sound like CIA psyops to go "well saying that someone's analysis post contains harmful rhetoric is really rude" pfft. again, i'm not saying i'm immune to hypocrisy, but i've certainly malded enough times in public about the shit people have said in this fandom to take issue with that. now, getting a little less into the strictly-analysis side of things, i understand that insults like calling someone an idiot may not sit right with everyone, to which i say. block to your heart's content. but c'mon man i've called people idiots before i'm no saint 😭😅
anyway. i hope this clarified some things, anon. take issue with whatever and whoever you like, honestly, whether that's me, the person that i just not-vagued for the last however many words, etc etc -- again, your prerogative. and i agree, it's a shame the situation devolved into stuff like insults in both bloggers' inboxes when it really didn't have to be like that like. at all.
#disk horse#tw discourse#tw negativity#my asks !!#i dont mean to cause offense but i do think it's important to clarify in case my original posts were unclear#i dont think there's any amount of group tone policing anyone's blog and deciding what people on dreblr can or can't post#when said posts aren't you know actively harassing someone else and encouraging harm#that's like. productive. or good at all for the health of this community#hence why i've emphasized the idea encouraging disagreement in healthy ways so much#now would i have approached the conflict the same way as this blogger? i mean no. but we're not the same people#and we both do things for our own reasons. his blog isn't my turf and isn't where i'm setting my rules#and it would be a massive level of overstepping for me to try and do that? and you know. controlling and rude etc#further vagueing re: personal conflict is quite different from vagueing re: analytical conflict#and i understand that some people might take the insults as too personal to be within an analytical environment but again#i think it's absolutely fair to draw that line for yourself and block whoever you think is being unacceptably rude#but im sure as hell not gonna go up to him and say that it's my right to decide for him how 'rude' he is or isnt allowed to be on his blog#the two bloggers in question in this situation weren't exactly friends and the vagueing was with respect to the person's analysis#not vagueing them for being a Bad Person or Bad Friend or whatever#but anyway. i hate to comment on this honestly so i might delete later#and this is definitely the last i have to say on this specific situation
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in honor of the wicked trailer, I'm dropping this here in case anyone's never seen it before. cynthia erivo, queen
#cynthia erivo#is there a professionally shot version of her singing this at an event?#sure#but this phone video of an actual performance canNOT be beat#the sonnets I would write about her diaphragm#the epics I would write about her breath control!#truly one of the greatest musical performers alive#this isn't my favorite show in the world#but when I saw her live in it#I legit like........sOBBED during this#sOBBED SOBBED#I'm crying just watching the video now#but I was truly inconsolable#and not just because it's a gorgeous song with a meaningful message!#but because being in the presence of someone with a steel spine iron lungs and golden vocal chords#and watching them absolutely strip the paint off the theater around you#is honestly the closest I get to a religious experience#I have a lot to say about modern broadway and the vocal gymnastics that are going too far#bc people want to be able to do this shit but like - this is not vocal gymnastics#this is a craftsman being incredibly technically skilled at their craft#and an artist who understands the medium of musical theater#it's not.......pop runs you know?#other live vocal performances that made me bleed from the eyes (positive)#sutton foster singing gimme gimme at like...21?#heather headley in aida#every single fucking performer in octet#keisha setttle (?) in waitress singing I didn't plan it#and its a different flavor#but jonathan groff in everything I've seen him in#the purity of tone!!!!!!!
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ah yes, she's concerned about the aggressor and attacker who was invading them six months ago. something is wrong with the empire right now, poor edelgard; whatever could've happened to her? :(
like... what. why do you care about what's going on with her specifically when she's the person who made the decision to invade leicester? does the whole war just mean nothing to marianne? it's just totally fine that all those people died in a war edelgard started? poor edelgard, something happened to her after she started her attack? you're concerned about the leader who gave the order to attack your home?
hopes has stupid lines but this one is top tier of the top tier and just an excuse for more edelgardjerking from the writers.
#DCB Three Hopes Run#like no sorry if someone attacked the country i live in and then suddenly their army was a mess#i would /nooot/ be concerned about the leader who ordered an invasion of my home#you'd never see a character being like wow i sure am worried abt dimitri and claude#who are just defending themselves and fighting for their lives out there#but here we get marianne being worried abt the person who declared war on her people#this game tries so so SO hard to make edelgard seem justified and doing a good thing#and also has tons of characters being like wow i sure do just want the best for her#like no i would not want the best for someone who invaded my country unprovoked#being worried abt the civilians in the empire is one thing bc the imperial army was out of control#but just wanting edelgard specifically to be okay? uhhhh. seems like this was just#the only way the writers could keep it in their pants without having shez make a sex joke at edelgard like byleth can#like does marianne not realize the end goal here was to defeat and thus kill edelgard?#it doesn't happen bc of the plot bc thales' magic and yadda yadda#but ultimately without that happening she would've had to be killed to be truly defeated#she's not like claude who would prioritize survival. she would fight to the end#like if you're that concerned about the person who started this war then why are you fighting against her?#either join her side or stay out of the war. really don't understand why anyone from leicester in ag would be worried abt her#they can't even use the classmates excuse bc they weren't even classmates for that long (and it's a stupid excuse even in gw)#but like no rly this game just has ppl love up on edelgard for absolutely no reason#she comes in and starts killing their soldiers for her conquest and marianne six months later is like wow i sure am concerned abt her!!#literally like imagine someone from crimea being like ''im concerned abt ashnard''
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Hello hello! It's me again! (That one Anon who requested Lies with Kazui & Yuno, but I've set up my account now so no need to ask anonymously again lol) Thank you for satisfying my previous request, it was such a delight to read. I keep rereading it every now and then and I'm still always left in awe with it like jesus christ you didn't have to go all in on that im sobbing with the 0207 friendship dynamic.
I've also seen your latest post and drabble asks. I'd like to request from the Drabble List#1 - #5 “Idiots. They are all idiots.” with Es themselves!
Let the prisoners have fun and Es just stares at them nonchalantly, silently judging their idiocy from afar, hell, maybe even let Yuno/Mikoto convince them to join. You can do anything as long as you think it'll fit, they're all just a little silly (minus the fact they're in prison lol).
With all that said, take your time and no rush! I can always wait. Thanks a lot! ...now back to rereading my previous request for the nth time,, i love it so much,, thankyouagain
Ah thank you so much, that means so much!! I'm so glad you liked it, that one was really nice to write :'D And yesss thank you for the request -- this was such a blast to do as well! (though I also made myself emotional over Es' lost childhood, that was less fun ;___;) I debated on several activities within the prison but thought this was plausible and fun for some mid-T1 shenanigans
Es had a job to do. They had many eyes watching them. They had several lives in their hands. They had heavy responsibilities. They didn’t have time for something as silly as ‘video game night’, regardless of the laughter that bubbled up from the common room as they passed by. They were not way tempted to join, regardless of how much fun the group seemed to be having when they peered their head in.
Fuuta had whined that Es had replaced all his requests with completely outdated consoles and games, confirming they had been successful in choosing things without any access to the internet or outside world. Plus, they thought, this gave the older prisoners a fighting chance with some of the games.
Not that they cared whether or not the prisoners had a good time. That wasn’t any concern of theirs. Even in these long periods of rest between their more eventful duties, they must remain focused.
The laughter crescendoed into delighted screaming.
Es figured one more look inside wouldn’t hurt. They were supposed to be keeping an eye on everyone, after all.
The prisoners had gathered various chairs and bedding material, creating makeshift couches. Some piled onto the new seating, some splayed out on the ground, others stood in excitement. The television was so small, the two players needed to lean all the way forward to see.
Mahiru bounced in her seat as Yuno whipped around her remote. Fuuta was demanding Kazui play better, gesturing wildly at the screen. Shidou chucked to himself as the others grew more intense. Haruka kept asking questions about the game, receiving an answer only about half the time.
As the match got closer, Yuno leapt to her feet. She tried to shimmy in front of Kazui and block his view. He stood to prod her out of the way. Muu called foul play, though she said it with a thrill rather than accusation. Fuuta repeated it -- with quite a lot of accusation -- and tried to push Yuno out of the way. Mikoto tried to hold him back, voicing his support of Yuno’s methods.
The others got caught up in the yelling. Amane’s eyes were wide in anticipation. Kotoko pumped her fist as the battle got even closer. The room erupted in movement and shoving and tripping and remote pulling -- until they yanked the tiny television forward.
The thick cord came free, and the screen went black just before a winner was announced. Ten voices chorused their outrage.
Es shook their head. “Idiots. They are all idiots.”
They turned away as the prisoners hurried to set everything up again. They were just about to turn the corner into the panopticon when Yuno’s voice called from behind.
“Hey!” She ran up, taking advantage of their brief pause. “I saw you passing by. Why don’t you come join us?”
Not for the first time, Es wished they had enough height to look down on all the prisoners. “I’m your warden. I’m not some child here to play games with you all.”
She pursed her lips. “I’m not a kid either. But I’m still down for a night to unwind.”
“You’re lucky to have the luxury to relax. I, on the other hand, am busy right now.”
Yuno made a show of looking left, then right, across the empty hallway. “And what exactly are you doing right now?”
“I’m working.”
She frowned. “Uh-huh…”
“I am!” They fumbled for more, coming up blank. They should have known the moment she came skipping over to them that it would be impossible to fool her. There was no need for this routine check of the prison; everyone was gathered in the common room except them. Yuno had known this before uttering a single word.
Her hands fluttered in a dismissive gesture. “Too much work is never good for you. It doesn’t matter how mature you are -- if you get too caught up in your job it’ll drive you to some crazy things.” She smirked. “Just look at Shidou. Or Mikoto!”
“I could look at you…”
Though surprise flickered across her face, she kept grinning. “Exactly! So let’s get you in here.” She tugged on their arm. Prisoners couldn’t physically move Es against their will.
They huffed as they found themselves inching closer and closer to the entryway.
“I suppose I can come and watch,” they muttered, “and still keep an eye on you all.”
“No! No more working!” She managed to get them into the room. “Here, you can take my spot in the next round.”
Kazui looked over. “Who said you were getting the next spot?”
“Oh come on, I was clearly going to win that one.”
“Clearly? I'm pretty sure was seconds away from beating you.”
“Well then, I guess Es can take your spot.”
“Es is playing?” Haruka looked up excitedly.
“I haven’t agreed to anything yet.”
It was as if they hadn’t said anything at all. The others launched into a discussion of who would give their remote to Es? Who would they’d face off against? Were they resetting the bracket they’d begun? Which game would they return to? The ten argued in circles for a while. For a group of murderers, they were insistent on a fair tournament. After breaking up some bickering that could have become physical, Es once again wondered how they ended up watching over a mess like this.
At length the game was chosen, and a rematch was slated for Yuno and Kazui later in the night. To save themself time and sanity, Es went ahead and picked their opponent.
“I’ll play Fuuta.”
He had been the obvious choice: he could supply enough chatter for the both of them, so Es could remain silent. Also, he was guaranteed to win and free them from an obligation to play more than one round. They flashed a look at some of the more observant prisoners, hoping they didn’t tip them off.
However, no one was really watching them too keenly. Mahiru clapped in joy. Yuno beamed. Mikoto shoved a remote into their hands. Haruka started rapidly explaining the rules to them. Shidou directed Es to their seat in the center. Kotoko gave them an encouraging nod. As expected, Fuuta was already deep into trash talk as he sat next to them.
They really were simple-minded people, more focused on this silly game than the fact their warden had just sat amongst them. It was dangerous to let one’s guard down in a place like this, Es reminded themself.
With a little jingle, the match began.
Their fingers flew across the controls. Though they had a rocky start, some sort of muscle memory kicked in. Surely this game had come out before they were born, and there was no way they’d played it regularly. None of that mattered much. Their little avatar was obviously gaining the lead.
Their eyes stayed fixed on the screen as they received slaps on the back and nudges. Their guard's cap was knocked off in the shuffling, but they couldn't risk picking it up. Voices called all around them.
“Aw, don’t just let the kid win!” Mikoto said.
“I’m not!” Fuuta was desperate. “They fucking tricked me! They’re a pro!”
Es felt energy run through their entire body. Their original plan already slipping away, they wondered if they could actually beat Fuuta. It would be fun to see… They leaned forward, holding their breath. The audience continued cheering the pair on. Once again, the room was swept up in shouts.
The match ended. A little banner flashed across the screen to name Es victorious. They jumped up, a small whoop escaping them.
They would’ve melted in shame right then and there, if the sound weren’t already drowned out by the surrounding chaos. The others laughed and shook Es in amazement. Fuuta let out a string of colorful language.
“That was incredible!”
“Holy shit!”
“How’d you do that?”
Es placed the cap back on their head, pulling it over their eyes. “I don’t know. And it doesn’t matter. I’m done for the night.” They tried to pass off the remote, but Mikoto pushed it back into their hands.
“Nuh-uh. I want to see this for myself.” He grabbed the other one from a dejected Fuuta. “Same game. Same characters. Lemme see what you’ve got.”
Es wasn’t meant to play one round, much less get caught up in their ridiculous tournament.
Don’t be an idiot, they told themself.
“Bring it on,” they told Mikoto.
#milgram#es#yuno kashiki#fuuta kajiyama#mikoto kayano#and everyone else#i always worry it gets too busy with too many characters but i think this works 👍#thank you for all your kind words!!! i feel like a broken record but it really means so much to me --#im so happy youre enjoying these as much as i am >:3#my next one is going to be a bit more serious but it was really fun doing these lighter ones :')#they deserve a night of relaxation and fun! im absolutely obsessed with es' insistence on their duty and solemn attitude#because theyre just a kid! they need a break! theyd get excited and competitive just like anyone else! they should be allowed to!#UGH#i think es and amane are a bit too similar with their struggles with age and being controlled by adults where its harder to get along#but yuno also understands what its like to want to be seen as a responsible mature person despite a younger age#and shed know how best to say things lightly but still meaningfully <3#yeah i thought about them doing sports or cooking or karaoke but this worked the best#haruka and amane dont have much experience with video games but i think theyd catch on quick#shidou has a lot of fun but he sucks ass LMAO#mahiru also isnt great but even if she was doing good shed let everyone else win to make sure their spirits stay up#im a sucker for writing where a character says something over and over and you just know theyre trying to convince themselves 😂#someone tell me to stop rambling in the tags and just make a new post for gods sake asdfsdfds#i hope you enjoy!#im late by now but woo happy getting your account set up 👏 welcome to the hellsite...#drabbles
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I wanted to draw Fio with a smile u-u
This is a reupload. I was gaming and didn't realize how it uploaded.
#nier#nier reincarnation#every time i drew her she wasn't smiling and she frowns in a lot of her art too#she smiles a lot too i just havent looked in a while#fio#i woke up today and found out there aren't nier concert locations close enough to me IM SOOOOO SAAAAAAAAAAd#the one i was considering going to is near my mom's birthday#i absolutely cant do that one. its my moms birthday weekend she would throw a fit#'ning bring your mom' no she wouldn't understand. i'd have to pay for everything and we'd need a hotel room#kaine is running around in lingerie. i cant bring my mom#and the other one is is la which is an absolute no.#if iwanna be trapped in a room with my mom for 3 days i can just live with her i already do that#ill just pray for a dvd release and buy that u_u#I JUST GOT DONE PLAYING OG RE3 AND HAVE BEEN DISORIENTED. ITS A GREAT GAME. I HATED IT.#IM TRYING TO CONVINCE MYSELF NOT TO REPLAY IT 8 MORE TIMES BUT I WANT TO SEE THE EPILOGUES. I HATE TANK CONTROLS SO MUCH
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listen,, i am Not defending all of sky's actions or his personality but he's genuinely just not as bad as the fandom makes him out to be.
a lot of y'all forget that sky is a prince with extremely overbearing and downright abusive parents that refuse to listen to him or treat him with any ounce of respect. and that the whole diaspro vs bloom situation was started directly because his parents forced an arranged marriage between diaspro and sky, constantly telling her parents that it would work out and never listening to sky the hundreds of times he tried to stop it. like again, he's not great, he's my least favorite specialist. but that situation was never in his favor. he was a 16 year old that dealt with strict, emotionally abusive parents his entire life and got forced into an arranged marriage with someone he never loved and was constantly told that it Needed to happen for the kingdom. trying to play it out like he's a serial cheater with some nefarious master plan is like,, really weird. again! not a great person he does a lot of shitty things. but blaming that specific situation on him, a teen with absolutely no say in his life who just met someone he genuinely likes and could love, instead of his parents is incredibly weird to me.
#i just think that entire situation was extremely unfair for everyone involved#and its really weird when people try to make it out like sky was some serial cheater mastermind#like dude no he's a child with horrible parents and no control over his personal life#and yeah absolutely he shouldnt have lied or led bloom on. but also remember that Technically he was in disguise because#Apparently assassins are constantly after him (ignoring that winx does a piss poor job at showing that)#like idk this little boy who never had a say in his life suddenly meeting this little firecracker of a girl that has A Lot To Say#and isn't afraid of running her mouth or expressing herself. And even encouraging him to do the same?#like? yeah id fall in love with bloom too tf#and i feel like people forget that sky told both his parents And diaspro that he didnt love her like. multiple times.#anyway. i still hate sky.#but i hate him for like. actual reasons instead of He Fell In Love With Bloom Despite Being In A Forced Engagement Oh No#like we could criticize him for not trusting bloom or for projecting all of his own faults onto other characters#but trying to say he was at blame for just being like. a teen in love is Extremely weird to me#like i dont think it would be fair to say that he should just. never fall in love with anyone and should just be happy marrying someone he-#-never loved or had any romantic feelings toward#like you guys Can understand aisha hating her arranged marriage and falling in love with 'ophir' despite it#but you Can't understand sky hating his arranged marriage and falling in love with bloom despite it#its so much easier to say you dont like sky please just say that
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look i don't usually go here but in honour of interview with the vampire season 2 and the recent uptick in vampire/buffy-inspired AUs i've seen floating around on my dash... eobarry interview with the vampire AU?? 👀
eobard is lestat, as if that doesn't go without saying
#i would be like ohhh well len as armand but im gonna be real with you all that i do not yet know enough about armand to make that claim#i tried reading the books but i have yet to make it through the first one :/ it's a SLOG#nora could be claudia cos we know eobard is fond of her but absolutely also not above using her to manipulate the shit out of barry#it all WORKS okay. eobard as the manipulative creator. barry filled with resentment over this thing that's been done to him#that he doesn't understand... relying on eobard to teach him how his new abilities work#while eobard is also able to use his ignorance of vampirism to control him and limit his potential....
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when it comes to the topic of the exp share/general easiness/quality of life features in pokemon games i am of the opinion that yeah, pokemon is a children's series, it should always have an extremely low bar of entry for completion, ultimately the success of their difficulty balancing should be based around new-to-the-series 7 year olds and not adult lifelong fans. way too many people forget this and it makes their criticisms look really silly. however, on a personal level..... i like pokemon! i think it's fun when players are able to vary the difficulty in some way to suit their own experience! i am delighted that things like the universal exp share and switch mode exist, and often use them myself on casual playthroughs, but i think them being toggleable is a net positive so i still don't really understand why they aren't anymore, and don't think "go play a romhack" works that well an effective rebuttal. (you should absolutely go play a romhack tho. shoutout drayano. also emulation sweep)
#i think a lot of the mockery of this argument just comes from a place of wanting to feel smug about pokemon fans#and yeah man i get it pokemon fans are absolutely ridiculous 80% of the time. but like. i dont think you understand that the argument#is less 'they should make the games harder to appeal to me' and more 'why are they actively removing all options to control game difficulty#it wouldnt be as much of a problem if the games were balanced well. but LMFAO#but again i dont think a kids' game being easy is an Inherent Flaw it is what it is. they should be like that. that's good#i also dont think pokemon should canonise the nuzlocke or whatever the fuck. let me do that myself#i just think removing the options from the players to rebalance the game to their own liking is annoying#and i think the level of ridicule and sneering around that specific complaint is mean and in bad faith
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