#confession n.63

[star-trek-fandom-confessions]

Confession #63

"I may not be a fan of the boy genius trope, but I still don't think Wil Wheaton deserved harassment and hate from the fandom for playing Wesley Crusher. That being said, I think Wesley becomes a much more likeable character when he's allowed to have normal problems like girl troubles or getting chewed out by Picard for messing up."

[nats--sw]

Orange Juice | Leah Williamson

Leah Williamson x reader Where Leah finds you again after a while and decides to help you out This is based on this request Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, alcohol addiction my masterlist

Football was incredible. Ever since you were a kid, kicking the ball around always made you happy. Your parents thought it was just a phase, that by the time you hit your teens, you'd move on to something else. But that never happened.You earned a scholarship in the US and you only returned to England after establishing yourself as a future star in the NWSL. You had a bright future there, but when Arsenal showed interest, you couldn’t say no to the club that made you fall in love with the game. 

By then, you’d already faced your first injury, you ruptured your ACL at 19. 

But that was already in the past, now you were in your new club. 

Leah was the same age as you when you joined the team, so you two clicked right away as the youngest on the team. Then, at 21, you both made your senior debuts for England, Leah as a defender and you as a forward. But shortly after that camp, you tore your hamstring, leaving you out again. 

And the thing with Leah… It wasn’t until you were 23 that, after months of innocent flirting and endless scenes of jealousy, you both finally admitted there was something more between you. It was one of the best moments of your life, you were playing great, Leah was playing great too, you’d just confessed how in love you were, and Arsenal was in the race for the league title. But then your body betrayed you again. 

It happened during a game against Aston Villa in 2021. You were subbed in after 63 minutes, and by the 70th minute, you had to be stretchered off after a bad fall from a collision with one of the players. 

“Y/n!” Leah rushed to see you after the game, her heart racing when she saw you crying in your cubby. “What happened?” she asked, a bit calmer when she noticed the ice bandage was on your ankle and not on your knee. 

“Just a sprain, but a bad one” you said, trying to hold back your tears. With the adrenaline now wearing off, the pain was really hitting you. “I’ll be out for at least six weeks”

“You’ll miss the rest of the season,” Leah blurted out. When she saw you hide your face with your shirt and start crying, she realized her mistake. “Love, I’m sorry” she said, kneeling beside you, trying to comfort you. “You’ll get through this, I promise,” she whispered, taking your hand and kissing it. 

You did get through it, but the following season brought another setback, a meniscus injury this time. 

“England striker, Y/n L/n, will undergo surgery and will miss the next  European Women's Championship.”

The reporter’s voice echoed in Leah’s head, she still remembered it clearly. It has crushed her, but it hurt even more seeing you on the hospital bed, turning your back on her.

Leah was set to captain the Lionesses while you were stuck on the sidelines, unable to play. It wasn’t her fault, but you couldn’t help feeling that pang of envy.

You thought you’d seen the worst of it, but when you watched Leah and the rest of your old teammates lift a trophy in a packed Wembley, it broke you. 

“Y/n! Where’d you go darling?!” Leah’s voice was ecstatic over the phone, with the sound of the girls celebrating in the background. “I tried to find you. You’ve got to come and celebrate with us!”

Leah had no idea you were already back at the house you two shared, the England shirt you wore during the match now lying on the bathroom floor. 

“I wasn’t feeling well” you replied, your voice tired.

“Huh? Is it your knee? Want me to bring something for the pain?”

You felt like a selfish jerk for resenting the person you were supposed to love, but you wouldn’t take away Leah’s moment. You knew she wouldn’t do that to you either. 

“I’m fine, don’t worry” you lied. “Just go enjoy yourself with the girls, you all deserve it.” you said, fighting back tears. But as soon as Leah said goodbye, you lost it. You cried all night and the next morning, watching them celebrate on tv. You were supposed to be there. You cried so much that your eyes were swollen, making it impossible to hide from Leah that you’d been crying. But, lucky for you (if that’s what you call it), Leah didn’t call you for two days, still celebrating. 

Her face was everywhere, on tv morning, noon and night. 

Then, Leah’s sudden fame messed with your relationship. It felt like you were drifting further apart. Interviews, radio shows, tv appearances, her Insta blowing up, it was all too much too fast. She didn’t have time to be with you during your recovery, and you weren’t up for a holiday in Ibiza with her and the rest of your teammates. 

The breaking point came during that time, while she was partying in Ibiza. You two had a huge argument when Leah found out you’d skipped your recovery session. Leah could argue for hours when she was convinced she was right, but with a hangover the size of Europe, your upset voice was the last thing she wanted to hear. 

“Why do you have to be so damn stubborn?!” Leah was yelling into the phone, while Keira sat nearby, clearly uncomfortable listening to the argument. 

“I just needed to stay home, away from everything and get some rest” you explained, pinching the bridge of your nose in frustration. 

“If you were going to skip the sessions, you could’ve at least come with me” Leah snapped, pacing back and forth. 

That really got under your skin. Leah wasn’t just upset about you missing the sessions, she was more annoyed that you turned her down. 

“I miss you,” Leah said, but even Keira could hear how empty that sounded.

Things had been off between you two since before the Euro camp even started.

“You miss partying with me, which isn’t the same,” you shot back. Leah had days off before the trip and could’ve spent time with you, but instead, she kept finding excuses to hang out with the girls.

“Are you seriously saying that?” Leah almost shouted. Keira’s eyes widened, thinking Leah must still be a bit drunk to be going off like this.

“You could be here if you missed me. You could’ve come to my sessions, which you know are a nightmare, but instead, you’re partying in Ibiza.”

“Fuck, Y/n. I just won the Euros! Of course I want to celebrate. If you knew how great it felt, you wouldn’t be saying this shit. It’s not my fault your stupid knee decided to mess up.”

That was the last straw for Keira, who quickly grabbed the phone from Leah’s hand.

“Y/n, Leah’s drunk. She doesn’t mean what she’s saying,” Keira said, giving Leah a stern look.

“Tell Leah to go fuck herself,” you snapped.

Leah took that to heart. Twitter was quick to pick up on the videos from that night, showing Leah getting pretty drunk. But what no one knew was that in one of the group chats with the girls, someone had shared a video where Alessia and Ella were laughing, it was silly, and in the background, Leah was dancing way too close with another girl. At first glance, it might not have been obvious, but you knew Leah well enough to recognize her, even in the dark.

When Leah came home from Ibiza, your stuff was gone.

The next season was awkward. Everyone on the team knew there’d been some drama, but they didn’t know the details. It was clear that you and Leah had been together for ages, then suddenly broken up after Ibiza. And some of them knew you had renewed your contract for just one more year.

One day, Lia joined you for lunch, ignoring Leah. “You know she didn’t cheat on me, right?” you said, trying to set the record straight.

There’d been rumors flying around that Leah had cheated, but that wasn’t true. After seeing that video, you confronted Leah when she called asking why you weren’t home. She’d sworn on her mother’s life that even though she’d been with that woman all night, nothing more than a few dances had happened. Leah wasn’t a good liar, so you believed her.

“Yeah,” Lia said, “but Keira spilled some stuff, so I know Leah was kind of an idiot with you.”

“I feel like I messed up everyone’s holiday,” you said with a sigh. You hadn’t talked much to the other girls either, and they’d picked up on your indifference to their Euro win.

“It’s not always easy to celebrate someone else’s big moment,” Lia said, taking another bite.

The next season didn’t get any better for you. Your performance was tanking because of how you were feeling, both physically and mentally, so Leah wasn’t shocked to see your name missing from the England squad list again. 

Leah had already missed the World Cup due to her ACL injury, and while she was in Australia, watching from the stands as her teammates made it to the final, she finally got a taste of how tough it was for you during the Euros. And it hit her, she realized it was probably even harder for you. She was a defender, but you were a striker, the star everyone was watching, the one who scored all the goals. When you got sidelined, replaced by the season’s top scorer and other younger players, it was like you’d been forgotten overnight. That hit hard.

You both messed up, that was clear. Leah knew she could have handled things better, and she was determined to make it right as soon as she got back to England. But fixing things wasn’t going to be easy.

Leah was hanging out with the team, getting ready for the pre-season meeting, when she noticed something odd. You weren’t there, and Jonas had this sad look on his face. Just as she was about to ask where you were, you walked in with crutches and wearing a knee brace. 

“Morning,” you said as you made your way to the center of the room, with Jonas helping you along.

Leah did a double take. You were in sportswear, but not in the Arsenal kit.

“I don’t know if you all heard, but a few weeks ago I blew up my knee,” you said, glancing at Leah with a sad smile. 

Leah’s heart dropped. That meant you’d torn your ACL and meniscus again, plus your MCL.

“And I’d made it clear that I’d only renewed for one more season... last season. So...” you said, taking a deep breath and avoiding eye contact with Leah. “I’m retiring, I mean, professionally… from football. I won’t be renewing.” You fought back tears, quickly wiping your cheeks with your jersey sleeve. “I just came to say goodbye.”

Leah stayed in her chair while the other girls got up to give you hugs and say their goodbyes. Kim and Jonas noticed what was going on and told everyone to give you and Leah some space.

“How bad is it?” Leah asked, still sitting, arms crossed, eyes locked on your knee brace. She couldn’t believe she hadn’t heard about this sooner. She was clearly shocked.

“Well, it’s the second time I’ve messed up this knee,” you said, sinking into a chair a little away from Leah. “The doctor says I’ll never get back to even 60% of my old self. I don’t want to play if I can’t give it my all.”

“You can still do it,” Leah said, her voice firm.

“No, I can’t. My record’s already bad. What club’s gonna want a player who’s always at risk of injury?” you said, rolling your eyes.

“We’ll pay,” Leah insisted.

“You’re not the club,” you replied with a sarcastic smile. “They offered me one more season, but they’ll cut my salary. And I don’t want to be a burden, not anymore.”

“Y/n, an injury doesn’t mean your career’s over,” Leah said, raising her voice a bit. “You just need to get through this and move on. Just like last time.”

“It’s not that simple,” you snapped, annoyed that Leah wasn’t getting it. “Do you really think I can compete with Alessia or Stina? I can barely score more than one goal a month, I can't even run like before, Leah. And that’s my job!”

“But-”

“No!” you cut her off, dropping your crutches in anger. “Just leave me alone. If I want to retire now, that’s my choice. I’m not you!” You cried harder. “Nobody misses me on the team! I’m not you!” 

Leah bit her lip, struggling to hold back her tears.

“I do miss you,” she admitted, wishing she could find the guts to stand up, walk over, and kiss you to show how she felt. But ironically, the fear of losing you forever left her feeling paralyzed.

“I can’t do this,” you said, struggling to stand up. “If you start talking about us, I’ll take back my decision, and I don’t want that. Good luck,” you said, wiping away your tears as you left the room.

That was the last Leah saw of you. Your retirement was lowkey, just an announcement and a few social media posts. Leah found out later that you’d gone back to the States as if you’d never been there at all.

You ended up in the US on a whim, just wanting to forget Leah, Arsenal, England, and football. That had been two years ago. No one knew where you were or cared that you were spending everyday drunk in some bar. 

You were okay with that. 

If it weren’t for a family matter, you’d still be hiding out there.

Your plan was simple: wrap up your stuff, grab some cash to continue your drinking habits of shitty american beer, and then return. But as soon as you landed, you hit the first bar you saw and pretty much stayed there.

It wasn't uncommon for former (failed) footballers to turn into addicts, and you were no different. Although you had attempted to quit drinking a year ago, when your money was running out, but without any support system in the US you couldn’t stay sober for more than a month before heading back to that familiar bar.

You were so drunk you didn’t even worry about running into anyone you knew now back in London. The only detail you vaguely recalled, though you were unsure of its significance, was avoiding blonde women. But you didn’t think twice about the men.

“Jacob,” Leah said, still in shock. She’d been sleeping when her brother called, saying he was sure he’d seen you drinking heavily in a bar he’d just arrived at with his friends.

“Glad you’re here,” Jacob said, guiding her to where you were. “She didn’t see me, I wasn’t sure how she’d react, so I wanted to wait until you got here.” He glanced at you as he spoke.

Leah’s heart sank when she saw you. It was definitely you, but you looked totally different, completely out of it and about to pass out on the bar.

“I’ll take her home,” Leah said quietly, making her way towards you. “Y/n,” she called softly, placing a hand on your shoulder. When you didn’t respond, Leah shook you gently and called your name again. “Y/n.”

You barely opened your eyes, but you recognized her immediately. “Lee,” you mumbled, and tears started rolling down your cheeks, though you didn’t really know why.

It wasn’t the first time you’d cried while being drunk, and it wasn’t the first time you’d cried for Leah while being drunk either.

“Hey,” Leah said, gently wiping the tears from your face with her thumbs. She didn’t remove her hands, as you were barely able to hold your head up. “Let me help you.”

Leah signaled to Jacob with a nod to help lift you from the other side. As they carried you to the car, Leah couldn’t wrap her head around what was going on. She’d never seen you this drunk before, not even when you used to drink occasionally during your time together.

With Jacob’s help, Leah got you into the back seat of the car and drove quickly to her home, which had also been yours a few years back.

Leah was totally stuck on what to do now. If it were up to her, she’d have tossed you in a hot bath to get rid of the alcohol smell, but she didn’t want to risk you passing out in the tub.

So, she just put you in the guest room. She placed a towel on your pillow, took off your jacket and shoes, and got you settled in bed. She also left a glass of water and some painkillers for when you woke up.

Next morning, when Leah woke up, the first thing she did was check on you, but she was surprised to find the room empty. The water and pills were still there, She freaked out a little, she couldn’t let you slip away again, not this time. She rushed downstairs and, while searching for her car keys, she noticed the kitchen was a mess. All the cupboard doors were open, and there was broken glass on the floor. Then she saw that the door to the backyard was wide open.

Trying to be quiet, she headed outside and found you sitting on the small terrace you’d set up years ago, holding a bottle of wine with your eyes shut.

“I’m awake,” you mumbled without bothering to open your eyes when you heard the door.

“It’s… 9 am” Leah said, pulling out her phone, her voice tinged with worry. “Isn’t it a bit early to be drinking?”

“It’s for the hangover,” you replied, taking a swig straight from the bottle. Leah looked around, noticing there was no glass or cup in sight. “Sorry, the glass broke when I grabbed it”

Leah stood there with her hands on her hips, looking worried. She had no idea where to start.

“Do you even remember how you ended up here?” Leah asked, stepping closer. She noticed you were shivering, probably from the morning chill. Without hesitation, she took off her hoodie and draped it over your shoulders, relieved when you didn’t push her away.

“Ah… I don’t really remember,” you said, trying to force a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes.

“What’s going on with you?” Leah asked quietly, almost afraid of the answer.

You shrugged and took another swig from the bottle. Leah was taken aback by how sober you looked despite the drinking. It seemed your tolerance was crazy high.

“Why did you leave?” Leah asked, gently placing her hand on your knee. At the touch, you jumped up, but the dizziness hit you hard, almost making you fall over. Leah quickly helped you back into your seat. “I won’t touch you again,” she said, holding up both hands as if to show she meant no harm. “I’m just asking you not to run away.”

You stared at Leah for a few seconds, noticing her glazed eyes and the slight tremble in her lower lip. You wanted to get out of there and avoid the whole sad scene, but you knew you wouldn’t get far and you didn’t even have any money left.

“I don’t want to answer any questions,” you muttered, staring at the ground.

“I need to ask a few things,” Leah said, almost reaching out to take your hand but stopping herself just in time. “I haven’t seen you in two years. Haven’t heard a thing from you.”

“That was the point. You had enough going on with your stuff. I didn’t want to add to it,” you said, trying to avoid her eyes.

“Damn it, Y/n, I never stopped caring about you. Not when we broke up, and not when you disappeared,” Leah said, quickly wiping away a tear. “Yeah, we messed up, but we could have fixed things back then, and we still can-”

“No, Leah.”

“Yes, we can-”

“Don’t say that. I’m not sober enough to deal with this,” you said, feeling frustration creeping in.

“Then go take a shower, and we’ll talk,” Leah said, her frustration matching yours. Why did you have to be so stubborn all the time?

“I’m not sober,” you repeated, stressing each word and holding her gaze, hoping she’d get it.

Leah swallowed hard, taking in the mess you were. Your hands were still shaking, and even though she thought your pale skin might just be from the morning, your flushed cheeks and the redness on your nose told a different story. The dark circles under your eyes were deep, making you look worse than she’d imagined.

Leah always thought she was the heavy drinker between the two of you. Her cabinet was stocked with all kinds of alcohol, and she’d always found it odd how you’d cringe whenever she brought home a new bottle. She remembered you mentioning a relative with addiction problems back when you weren’t even together, but she never thought it would hit you too.

“Have you… have you tried to quit?” Leah asked, her voice cracking as she grasped the seriousness of the situation. You nodded slowly, looking down, clearly embarrassed. “Could you try again?” she asked.

This time, you shook your head. “I can’t.”

“I can help you,” Leah said, determined.

“I don’t want your help,” you said frustrated, trying to get up again but failing.

“Y/n, look at yourself,” Leah said, exasperated. “You can’t even stand. Please, let me help you.”

You reluctantly agreed to let her help, mostly to get her to stop pushing. You figured that if you said yes and she saw how messed up you were, she’d leave you alone. What you didn’t remember was how stubborn Leah could be when she was set on something.

Leah couldn’t believe she actually managed to get you to go to rehab, but it seemed like it was working after a while. According to the doctor, you were doing great, really putting in the effort in your sessions and activities. So, it didn’t take long for you to get the green light for a day out, and of course, Leah was the one you’d spend it with.

“Good morning,” Leah said softly when she saw you. It was wild how you were starting to look more like yourself again.

“Morning,” you replied. It was weird to think that just a few months ago you were alone in the States, drinking day and night. And now Leah was here, smiling at you again. It was something you hadn’t realized you’d missed so much.

“I’ve got a surprise for you,” Leah said when you two were in her car. “I checked with the doctor because it might be a... sensitive topic for you.” Instantly, your heart raced in panic. Leah noticed your breathing quicken and gently placed her hand on your knee while steering with the other. You placed your hand over hers, and she didn’t hesitate to intertwine your fingers. “Just relax,” she said. “I think you’ll like it. And if I’m wrong, just let me know, and we’ll forget about it. No big deal.” She stopped at a red light, bringing your hand to her lips and giving it a gentle kiss.

It was something that had always helped you chill out. Even though you weren’t together anymore (not physically, at least. Both of you knew those feelings were still there, just waiting for the right time), it still felt good.

When Leah parked the car and you looked out the window, your heart raced again. You were right in front of a football pitch. Leah knew how much your struggles with the end of your career were a trigger for your addiction, so being here wasn’t exactly ideal.

“Leah, I don’t think-”

“Shh,” she said, gently taking your hand to help you out of the car. “Just give it a few minutes, okay? If it’s too much, we’ll head back.” She cupped your face, locking eyes with you.

You nodded, holding her hand tightly. Leah didn’t say anything, but she could feel the tension in your grip.

You walked together to the middle of the field. It wasn’t as big as the one you used to play on, but seeing it made you smile a bit, remembering the good times you had there with Leah.

“I should’ve been more supportive, you know,” Leah said as you both settled on the grass, still damp from the morning dew. “After my injury and the World Cup, I finally realized how lonely you must’ve felt. Part of it was my fault.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” you replied. “You didn’t owe me anything.”

“You were my girlfriend. I should’ve been there for you, giving you the support you needed,” Leah said, her tears starting to fall. You hated seeing her cry; it always made you feel awful.

“I was tough to deal with too. I didn’t make it easy for you,” you admitted, resting your head on Leah’s shoulder.  She turned and kissed your forehead without hesitation.

“Do you think we can get through this?” She whispered.

“I think we’re on the right track.”

Leah nodded and after a few minutes of silence, she stood up. “Don’t move,” she said, running back to the car. She came back with a mini football, the kind you can hold in one hand. “Wanna play?” she asked with a small, hopeful smile.

You laughed, shaking your head, but took her hand to stand up. The feel of the ball in your hands was weird but you couldn’t say no to Leah.

“Let’s warm up before my friends get here,” she said with a smirk. You didn’t get what she meant at first, but the excitement of kicking a ball again had you too pumped to question it.

Leah’s friends turned out to be a bunch of 12 year olds who had joined her every week to play football together. There were about seven girls, with the oldest being 13. She was the one who kept glancing at you the whole time.

“Excuse me,” the oldest girl said as they were about to leave after the game ended. “You’re Y/n L/n, right?” she asked, eyes locked on you.

“Jackie!” Leah hurried over and tried to cover the girl’s mouth. “What did I say about the questions?”

Leah kept talking to the girl, but you couldn’t catch what she was saying. Jackie was 13 now, but she was only 11 when you retired, and probably no older than 7 when you were at your peak. It touched you that she recognized you.

“Yeah, that’s me,” you said, holding Leah’s hand for support. “What’s up?”

“Your hair is longer and darker now,” Jackie said, eyeing you closely. “And your face is a bit different, but I remember when you kicked that penalty into the goal. I saw it in person!”

“Jackie,” Leah said again, but you pulled on her arm.

“Do you really remember?” you asked.

“I do! I saw you play. My sister took me to that game. Even though Arsenal lost, your penalty was the best.” Jackie said, her eyes shining.

Leah watched silently, a big smile on her face as she saw you light up with that familiar spark you’d lost over the years. She let you have a moment with Jackie, impressed by how you were reconnecting with your past. It made her even more certain about the idea she’d been planning to share with you.

The next weekend, you both were back out on the field with the girls. You spent some time teaching Jackie a few tricks. Your stamina wasn’t what it used to be, so Leah gave you a break. 

“I wish I had the energy of a 12 year old,” Leah said, flopping down next to you on the grass and handing you a bottle of water, but you shook your head.

“I’m good,” you said, pulling out a bottle of orange juice from your bag. Leah looked at you with a raised eyebrow.

“But you don’t like orange juice,” she said, wrinkling her nose as you popped the cap and the citrus scent hit the air.

“You don’t like it,” you said with a grin. “I never hated it.”

“You never bought it when we lived together,” Leah pointed out.

“That’s because you didn’t like kissing me with juice on my lips,” you teased, sticking your tongue out at her. “You were always so picky, even with that.”

Leah shook her head, remembering how she’d pull away in the middle of a kiss if she tasted something like orange juice on your lips.

“I’ve been drinking a lot of orange juice lately because plain water gets boring,” you said, putting the bottle away and sitting up straight. You glanced at Leah, who seemed like she wanted to say something.

"Your doctor mentioned you're about to be discharged," Leah said, glancing at you with a curious look.

"Yeah," you replied, a bit embarrassed. "I wanted to talk to you about that too." Leah raised an eyebrow, curious. "I don't have anywhere to stay, and my family's all moved away from London. And I need to keep up with the weekly therapy."

"You can stay with me," Leah said before you could even ask. 

"Thank you," you said with a relieved smile, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders.

"Can I confess something?" Leah asked, fiddling with the bottle in her hands.

"Sure."

"I'm afraid you'll leave again," she admitted, biting her lip. "You have no reason to stay, and I don’t want you to be alone again," she added, reaching for your hand and intertwining your fingers. "That’s why I've been thinking about something..."

You felt a bit panicked, knowing what Leah could be thinking.

"I’m not going to play again-" you started, but Leah cut you off.

"I know, honey," she said, stroking your hand with her thumb. "But I've been thinking...these girls need someone to teach them," she said, nodding toward the group of girls who were too busy fighting over the ball to rest.

"No, Leah-"

"Shh, let me finish," Leah said with a laugh. "It won’t be professional. It'll start as an amateur academy. We just need to build a dressing room, add a few more seats, and recruit some more girls."

"Leah, I'm not a coach," you said, shaking your head. "And running an academy, even an amateur one, costs money."

"I’ve got the money," she assured you. "I'm already talking to some local sponsors. And you’re great with the girls, you’ve got experience, and it’ll keep you busy doing something you still care about, even if you won’t admit it right now."

"I don’t know..."

"Just give it a shot," Leah said, bringing your hand to her lips and giving it a gentle kiss. "If you don’t like it, we’ll figure out something else."

You took a deep breath, feeling unsure but finally nodded. "Alright, I'll give it a try."

Leah was feeling a mix of nerves and excitement. After all the hard work, the tough times, and a few relapses along the way, today might be the day you could finally move back to her place. But she’d spent the night taking away every trace of alcohol from the house. Pouring out all those liquor bottles, which had cost her a fortune, felt a bit like a sacrifice, but knowing she was doing it for you made it almost satisfying. She’d also packed up all the wine glasses and stashed them in the attic, figuring they’d be better off out of sight for a while. 

She’d gone a bit overboard with the shopping too, piles of chocolate, different coffee flavors, and gallons of orange juice to cover any cravings you might have. And she’d moved her medals, trophies, and awards into her bedroom. She figured it would be better to ease you back into things slowly, rather than hitting you with the full weight of her football career all at once. 

“Good morning,” Leah said as soon as she saw you dragging your suitcase in.

You greeted her with a kiss on the cheek, and she offered to put your suitcase in the car while you settled into the passenger seat.

“I’m really nervous,” you admitted, shifting uncomfortably in the seat.

Leah didn’t say much, just reached out her hand. You took it without hesitation, intertwining your fingers with hers for comfort.

“I think it’s best if we skip the game with the girls today,” Leah suggested, seeing you nod in agreement. “Alright then, let’s go home.”

The drive to the house was quiet, neither of you saying a word. Leah held your hand the whole time, even after you two stepped inside.

"I got the guest room ready for you," Leah said, setting your suitcase on the floor.

"Will you come with me?" you asked. Leah nodded immediately, following you to the room. She smiled as you flopped onto the bed. "God, I missed sleeping in a good bed," you said, then looked at Leah, who was leaning against the door frame. "Come here," you said, patting the bed.

Leah kicked off her shoes and lay down next to you. She was a little surprised when you rested your head on her chest, but her hand instinctively went to your hair, stroking it gently. Throughout your rehab, you had been close, but Leah always worried about moving too fast, unsure about what the future held for both of you.

"You've changed a lot," you murmured, closing your eyes and smiling at the scent of Leah's shirt. "I like this side of you."

"What side?" Leah whispered.

"The side that takes care of me. I like you taking care of me."

Leah bit her lip, feeling it tremble a little. "I should have taken better care of you before. Maybe then you wouldn't have left."

"I didn't give you the chance. I didn't want to hear from you."

You both stayed silent for a few minutes, Leah holding you tighter.

"And now? Will you give me a chance to take care of you?"

"I’m doing that already," you said, lifting yourself up a little to look at her. "Thank you for not letting me leave again." You gave her a soft, short kiss on the lips.

Leah didn't ask for more, didn't move her hands or deepen the kiss. That small contact was enough for her. Trying again would be a slow process, and she didn't want to go back to what you had before. She wanted to start fresh, avoiding the mistakes of the past.

After almost two months, things were looking up. 

When you woke up, Leah wasn't in bed. You weren’t sharing a room yet, but she spent most nights with you, and last night had been one of those.

After showering, you headed to the kitchen and found Leah putting things away in the fridge. 

"Morning," you said, startling her. She quickly shut the fridge door and looked at you with wide eyes. "Everything okay?" you asked, walking towards her curiously.

"Uh, yeah, everything's fine," she said, taking a step back and letting out a curse as she bumped into the fridge.

"What are you hiding?" you asked, narrowing your eyes at her.

"N-nothing," she said, trying to squirm out of the situation, but you were quicker. You cornered her against the fridge. "Shouldn’t you be going? It's your first day of training with the girls," she reminded you.

"I can’t leave without my good morning kiss," you said, watching her features soften a little.

"I haven’t brushed my teeth," she lied, standing on her tiptoes to keep you from kissing her. She was definitely hiding something.

For a moment, you thought it might be something with alcohol. You'd noticed that all the alcohol in the house was gone, even the liquor filled candy Leah used to eat. But it was early in the morning, and Leah wouldn't be drinking anything with alcohol at that time. You trusted her, she was fully committed to your recovery. On the rare occasions she had a drink, she’d brush her teeth multiple times before kissing you. 

Leah thought she'd kept it a secret, but you'd caught her almost drinking the extra mint mouthwash.

So, it was highly unlikely that was the reason she didn’t want to kiss you.

"I'll be mad if you don't kiss me," you said, playing your last card.

Leah rolled her eyes but leaned in, brushing her nose against yours before giving you a short kiss. When she felt your tongue graze her lip, she knew she was caught.

"Leah!" you exclaimed, patting her shoulder. "You were drinking my orange juice!"

"I was thirsty," Leah laughed. "I'll grab some more juice for you, I promise," she said, wrapping her arms around your waist. She tried to kiss you again, but you turned your face away, causing her lips to land on your cheek. "Hey, there's no more juice left. Your only chance to have some is kissing me," she said, still holding your waist.

"I hate you," you said, shaking your head before finally kissing her. "You're not supposed to like that juice."

"I think I got so used to tasting it when I kiss you that I've started to like it," Leah said with a grin.

"Did you really drink all my juice?" you asked, almost sadly, resting your head on Leah's shoulder.

"Of course not, love," she said, stroking your back. "I think I bought all the orange juice in London. I can't have my girl without her daily glass of juice."

"Thank you," you murmured, kissing her again.

"I should say that," Leah whispered back.

[luxthestrange]

KNY Incorrect quotes#63...It'll work out....

Modern Highschool au

Tanjiro: I'm so happy, I could kiss you! Genya: Um...Neat

Later in the Shinazugawa home

Genya, lying face down on his bed: I said "Neat," Bro. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm fucking stupid!?! Sanemi, reading a book: Don't beat yourself up too much, Dingus. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when Y/n confessed their love for me? Genya: Didn't you thank them? Sanemi*closes the book and looks at the ceiling* I fucking thanked them.

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt.63)

(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: you never thought that just cuddling with Hobi on a cold day could lead to this; his pants off and you begging "Daisy please-"

Tags: fluff, a little hurt but mostly just comfort, first times, soft cuddle sex, unintentional mutual somnophilia, knotting, scenting, under clarified limits, a touch of slick kink, breeding kink, a touch of size kink (you know the good stuff), unrealistic amounts of cum, implied belly bulge, implied feral sex, small triggers after sex, small references to past abusive relationships, hole check's, knot checks, dom/sub undertones to later scenes but not in the main smut,

W/c: 14.2k

A/n: thank you guys for being patient for this next chapter :) it's one of my favorites so please give it lots of love! i know we've all been waiting for hobi's confession and the completion of their arc, did i do it justice? Also i'm sorry that i have a pathological need to end every single chapter with a cliffhanger lol, this one is no different!

Previous part ~ Masterlist

(5 years ago. Before Yoongi. Before everyone.)

Jung Hoseok cleans his arms in a bathroom. He is 21 years old, there is lipstick on his fingers, and nothing bad has happened to him yet.

Bad is all relative of course. Some would call growing up in a rich area while living in a one-bedroom apartment bad. Some people would call not really knowing your parents because they work late nights bad. Some would even say that the fact that they won’t pay for Hoseok’s college education a fucking tragedy.

But between you and me and Hoseok; other people wouldn't know a fucking tragedy if it hit them in the fucking face. Talking to some people about your suffering is like trying to make a toddler shoot the broad side of a god damn barn with a double barrel shotgun. Or like those little lemon slices they put in the water at olive garden-

It's fucking useless. And you're more likely to be sent to the hospital than get some actual fucking results. Weather it's because of food poisoning, a bullet wound, or because some idiot you trusted thinks you're a god damn suicide risk.

See right? Talking about your problems is fucking useless.

But he’s always been able to focus on the brighter side of things. It's a blessing and a curse because optimism always lies to you. It's easier to be happy than it is to be upset, at least for Hoseok at this moment.

At least he was an optimist until they ruined him a little. After this year, finding the silver will take effort.

The tiles beneath his feet are cold to the touch. He knows that there’s a button somewhere to turn on the heated flooring but he just can’t find it. Hidden and unfamiliar as he is with this den. So different from his own little dormitory halfway across the city.

This fancy three-bedroom apartment is one that he will move into in precisely 4 months once they make it official, he’ll live here for exactly 2 years 3 months, and 8 days before being kicked out and moving into the pack's den. It’s exactly 2 years to the date that he meets Min Yoongi in the record store.

But nothing bad has happened to him yet. Today he is just himself, No idea of what's about to befall him and that It won't just be bad.

This apartment is upscale, with its wainscotting and long gauzy curtains that barely keep out the sound of the city streets 5 stories below and the lightly warm June morning. He’s not quite sure who pays for this one yet. Hasn’t had the chance to ask, he's only been seeing this pack for 2 months. This Hoseok is shyer than the one you know. Timid and unsure of where he should place his dulled claws.

It's all awfully mysterious. The question of "What do your parents do?" and the answer pressed to a raised finger. The truth lingering between lipstick and manicure on a single giggled breath.

"That's a secret"

He casts a glance around the bathroom, the marble counters, the plush hand towels, and even the designer soap is forghein to him.

Rich people.

It's one part tired jealousy and one part true distaste. Even if Hoseok had all the money in the world he wouldn't waste it on painting a bathroom white or powdery Dior soap. Why not blue or orange or green or pink?

(Oh Hobi. The pack’s bathroom will be green one day, with delicate tiles in the shade of the lightest moss. Not yellow-toned and not blue. he's going to help yoongi pick it out, He just doesn’t know it yet).

Their apartment is just a few blocks from the college that he attends, a freshman but not for much longer. A freshman, along with the pack's youngest. Her on the business track and him in a weed-out art department. The prerequisite humanities course is their shared battleground.

Out of everything in this story, this is the only true coincidence.

This version of Hoseok likes omegas with a bit of a dark side. The ones that are a bit bitchy, a bit entitled and alot pretty. The ones that hone their eyeliner to a vicious edge, or the male ones that act a little bit more like alphas and disobey gender norms. That’s what drew his eye to this pack's youngest in their hum 1 class.

He got a little melty when her eyes turned less “I’ll kill you if you even sniff in my direction” and more “A pretty alpha like you has to have a pack right?”

Hoseok had stuttered when he’d said that No- he didn’t.

Before long he’ll drop out because he just can’t cut it at art school. Just can’t spend nights with fingers black from charcoal, working on things that will one day be thrown in the garbage because he’ll have a pack to attend to. Good alpha that he is.

(It will be years before he realizes that it wasn't art school just mediums. He’s meant to use flowers to make things instead.)

They’re not his pack yet, not yet. not yet. Not Yet- But there is a gift waiting for him downstairs. A fancy set of pastels and paints. It’s the start of courting even though he’s supposed to be the one buying them gifts. He’s the penniless college student they’re the ones with the nice apartment. He’s the one with the knot, and they’re all omegas. It’s a give-and-take.

Yet somehow even though he’ll be the only alpha he knows he won’t be the pack alpha.

He cleans the lipstick from his fingers. Bright red. He knows he has it in other places too, down below the tugged low hemline of his pants pulled on after they were done fucking.

The last thing he wants to be is like the other alphas in the fraternities on campus, the ones that holler at all the omegas shit like “I can taste your slick from here baby,” and “want to study anatomy together? I’m a hands-on learner” Hobi dreads the idea that he might be like that. Even a little bit. Even unintentionally.

But still, their words from earlier ring in his ears.

“They haven’t been dating for that long, you can’t expect us to be comfortable all the time with you in our nest, it's a really intimate thing for us."

Hobi feels like one of those phraternity alphas when it makes him uncomfortable.

It’s reasonable that they wanted to give his knot a ride and try him out before they make it official. One alpha and four omegas, these odds are every alpha’s wet dream. He knows his performance was Oscar-worthy.

It had been nice to be in a nest for just a little bit, Hoseok’s biology wants it, the tense knot between his shoulders all loose.

Hoseok has never been loved by someone who wanted to talk to him every day, it will be easy for them to reduce his focus to their beck and call.

There's 4 different colors of lipstick on his cock. Four different shades from four different women. His new packmates get to the carrot part of the carrot and stick arrangement.

In the future, he’ll deny that he ever thought of any of these women as that- as packmates. He'll say it was only ever Namjoon’s pack that he wanted in this way. He’ll say it never compared and it didn’t. Except for these first few months. These first few days.

Memories lie to us all the time; memory is the best secret keeper.

He watches one of his packmates sit on the edge of the nest, she wears the lipstick prints better than he does. Lining the inside of her thighs, her own lips smudged.

Hoseok doesn’t let the smile fall from his lips and she smiles back. She tugs her long hair free of a bun that she’d put it up in so that she didn’t get slick in it. It will be a few more months until she cuts it above her collarbones. Blunt to a brutal edge.

Hoseok’s sweatshirt is on the edge of the nest, and Hoseok watches as she brings it to her nose, breathing in deep. Hoseok is just about to say that she can wear it when she throws it onto a nearby ottoman. Not onto the floor thankfully. No omega has ever worn his sweatshirt before. Hoseok tries not to let the rejection of his scent sting.

She looks at the lipstick on Hoseok, there’s a bit on his lip. “Come here.” She asks, parting her legs.

Hoseok is a good alpha and goes.

~-~

(Now, You and Hobi)

When Hobi wakes it's because the pack is moving around the room, bickering, and struggling to be quiet, bickering a little.

Their low hum drum voices as they talk about “Jungkookie? where did you put my mittens?” and ”I sort of love that you still wear mittens, babe.” Yoongi’s deep rumble, “Did Jimin buy those for you too?” All teasing and understanding. Because if anyone knows how Tae likes to be teased, Yoongi does.

Tae’s fond little croon is so melodic it makes Hobi sigh, ears straining to hear more of it. “Yes, he did. Got pup matching ones too.”

Pup. that’s you. Curled in the center of the nest under Hobi's elbows. dozing but unable to lift your head from where it's pillowed. You’re sure that Yoongi knows you’re kind of awake or at least listening in because Yoongi knows everything.

You’re sure that as he looks down at you and Hobi tangled together, he’s doing it with a smirk. You don’t need to open your eyes and double-check.

The temperature of the nest is balmy, overly warm in the way that it gets when it’s cold outside and the nesting is hitting so particularly good that Hobi won’t even think of moving. (The way it feels when you come out of the cold and into the waiting arms of someone you love) Hobi nuzzles into the warmth in front of him.

A small storm brews outside. The snow has been falling since midday. Just a little here and there. But Tae loves how it looks with all the Christmas lights. There aren’t quite enough up yet but the holiday season is close.

But the snow won't last, soon it won’t be falling at all. It will all melt off by tonight, the afternoon is supposed to be sunny. Can sun showers happen with snow?

"Do you think we could walk all the way to the gym, it's not all that far! only like 10 miles. We could run it in like an hour!"

He listens to the others talk. The sound of Yoongi’s voice, gravely and vaguely upset. “Jungkook, you’re not really thinking about going to work out right now- You’ve barely been home for like 5 hours. I just said we could go do something not run 10 fucking miles.”

Jungkook always gets this way; when the dizziness of the seizures turns to restlessness and he's honestly fine but the others can't resist trying to baby him. Too awake to sleep anymore. He sounds grumpy, whiney, and pouty even though Hobi's eyes aren't open to see him turn his puppy eyes on Yoongi. “I’m never going to be able to sleep tonight if I don’t hyung- I’m gonna go crazy.”

There’s the faint sound of lips meeting and smacking. Kisses that are probably meant to soothe Jungkook. “How about we compromise pup.”

“A walk?” Tae offers, sounding hopeful.

“A long walk.”

You shift a little and Hoseok opens his eyes. You're mostly still asleep just settling, making yourself more comfortable with the new space no longer corralled by arms and bodies.

Hobi’s mouth is dry when he watches you shift onto your stomach your face half-smushed into the cushions, scenting them a little in your sleep. The homey scent fizzle in Hoseok’s bones tells him that you've scented him too. Being surrounded by the pack's scent like this makes Hobi’s skin feel like pop rocks. Like his bones are mentos and coca cola. All sensitive and tingly.

He’s cuddled with you before- through your nightmares and last night at the hospital of course- but it’s never been just the two of you in a nest. He’s never been the only alpha here, charged with guarding the pillows and blankets and you curled soft in the center.

Hobi tentatively puts an arm around your waist, tugging you a little closer. The house still hasn't totally warmed up yet and you'd be cold without some body heat. He does it slowly, seeing if you’ll wake.

There is a hand in his hair, petting softly, and he snatches his arm from around your waist the second Hoseok realizes he's being watched. Yoongi leans over the edge of the couch-turned-nest, smirking a little. The door shuts behind Tae and Jungkook with a puff of cold air, and he raises his eyebrows expectantly.

He would look intimidating if his beanie didn't have cat ears. 

The pads of Yoongi's fingers rub soothing circles under Hobi's jaw and his lips part unintentionally. “Be good yeah?” he says, whisper soft. Hoseok just nods, too sleepy to verbally respond.

They haven’t talked much about Hobi’s confession; that night on the beach what feels like ages ago. But everytime he thinks of it Hobi still tastes salt on his tongue and your name on his lips. 

Yoongi’s wearing the same look now that he did then; half hopeful and half worried. But if there was anyone that would object on your behalf, if Hobi wasn't allowed this closeness with you, Yoongi would tell him.

Yoongi doesn't say that you and him aren't ready for cuddling like this. Yoongi doesn't say that Hoseok should give you space or not cradle you to his chest like you are something as fragile and necessary and as doomed as his beating heart. Trembling and stuttering with the force of sweet expectations and hopes made hollow with satisfaction.

Yoongi does not realize that Hoseok's heart has not had a steady beat since he woke up holding you.

Yoongi doesn't say anything. Yoongi just drags a single knuckle down his cheek and leaves. Heading out after Tae and Jungkook who are, judging from the hallow sound of snow hitting the windows- are having a snowball fight.

“If one of those hits me I’m not holding anyone’s hand for the whole walk-“

The door keeps out the sound of Tae's sweet giggles and Jungkook’s pouted, "just one hyung- I won't hit your face-" 

And the two of you are alone. Wrapped up warm, quiet and hushed, just the two of you.

Well, except for Noodle.

The meticulously kept edge of the nest is all fluffed, Noodle makes sure of it. Small paws depressing the blanket as he kneads it and then settles on the edge. His purr is audible from here as he blinks slowly from the bottom of the couch turned nest. Jin wrangled him for a brushing yesterday morning and his coat still looks extra fluffy and kempt. 

Unwatched and unjudged, Hobi tentatively reaches to cradle your ribs again. Thumb smoothing down the center of your stomach, a little close to your belly button. You’ve got a little hair there. Hobi’s fingers like the feel of it. Not rough but not silky.

Your skin feels like champagne bubbles and sparklers, everywhere he touches your skin goes fizzy. Hobi looks down at you, breath hitching, and thinks Is it really so horrible to want this? Why am I so afraid of this? 

You wiggle a little closer in your sleep and Hobi’s arm goes vicelike.

Noodle's purr goes a little louder. 

Hobi doesn’t like to think about his last pack ever, but he recognizes that hollow ache and tug that says memories aren’t too far behind. And it threatens to swallow him until he looks down at you. The house is quiet but your eyebrows are puffed up like something very shocking is happening in your dreams. He doesn't want to think about them right now. 

He drags his nose across your hairline; scenting you. Tasting your emotions on his tongue. Comfort. Ease. Arousal-sweet. Not all that abnormal. Not nightmares then. He is always on the lookout for them. After Jungkook and the hospital, he sort of thought they might come back. 

Hoseok counts his stars and snowflakes, and rests his forehead against the nape of your neck.

Over the next hour, you’re restless. Moving, worming your way closer to him as he goes in and out of sleep. You make a soft noise and he shushes you. a growl that says to stay put and alpha's here.

You blink slowly up at him. Hobi pulls back, taking his arm from around your waist, feeling like he’s just stolen candy from a jar on the counter that’s for him anyway. You stretch and don't comment on it, yawning. 

Noodle hops closer, squirming between the two of you and stepping over your shoulders. Meowing right in Hoseok’s face. “Alright alright, I’ll feed you again.”

You snuggle into the warm hallow he left on the couch when he detangles himself, hand under your cheek watching him as he stumbles out of the nest. Noodle follows tail held high. It's truly horrible. Leaving the nest when every bit of Hobi's body wants him to stay in the warmth. The house is always so slow to warm up. 

“Fuck the floors are cold.”

“Quick,” you say, face above the edge of the cover. Hoseok rushes, doling out a single scoop of dry food and then running back to you. Hobi wastes precious seconds to grab his headphones from the kitchen table before collapsing onto the couch where you hold the blanket up, sealing the warmth and him back inside. The headphones tangle between the two of you and he falls with a giggle. Disappearing among the white blanket. He sinks thankfully into the warmth, into the safety that the nest offers. Into you.

Your warm arms wrap around his shoulders and his body shivers delightfully in a way that has nothing to do with the cold. Your jaw pops when you yawn and then he yawns too, a breath later. You laugh too and tuck your face into his shoulder.

“Fuck- it’s so cozy.”

It really is, the kind of cozy that only comes along a few times a year. A quiet to your bones that says there is nothing to do now but rest. The coldness that turns your bodies into these molten-loving things. Your warmth and Hoseok’s warmth. One warmth.

He breathes, deep and heavy.

“I don’t know if I want to get up yet.” The house is still quiet. Nothing but Noodles happy munching sounds and the faint scratch of big snowflakes hitting the windows.

Hobi’s heart beats frantic against yours and you sigh. “Wanna listen to some music?” He offers. Hobi always loves a backtrack, a little compliment for the exposition.

You nod, a little sleepy, but Hobi has a playlist for that. He’s got a playlist for everything including ’sleepy cozy pup time’. The headphones take a second to locate, lost in the nest. But when he does you share them. One earphone a piece, the sound turned low so you can still talk.

Hobi puts on a love song, and it makes you smell all sweet. Stretched out with your hair tangling because you’ve left it unbound, the split ends prodding at Hobi’s cheeks. He doesn’t really listen to the song, just watches you. Eyes closed humming softly.

Your scent sours and Hoseok's hand goes tight on your wrist. You tell him what's bothering you without him even having to ask.

“I saw this line the other day that didn't like." You look at the ceiling, not at him. "it said a love song is really good if you can’t tell whether they’re talking about another person or if they’re talking about god.”

You think about Jimin and Tae. You've been thinking about it since Tae talked about their childhood earlier and the bloody cross between the two of them. If holiness does exist, it’s in Tae. If there is anything like religion for you or Jimin, it's love. God has nothing to do with it. God's not the person who makes love songs sound good.

Hobi turns on his side, leaning on his elbow. “I’m not sure Jimin would agree with that either.”

You turn in time to see Hobi’s smile. It catches the sunlight, lingering right on his cheek. An octagonal shaft of sunlight that has traveled millions of miles to get there could not have found a more beautiful place to fall. He huffs a quiet laugh again, and you swear you might hear the highest note of a piano somewhere.

You wonder when he became so musical to you, maybe it’s just because he’s the person who made you love music so much.

(You can tell a love song is good, when it makes you think of Hobi).

“You’re still worried about him, aren’t you?” You rest your lips against his shoulder and Hobi’s body doesn’t move an inch. They’re soft where they lie not a kiss but not not a kiss either. You can rest your lips against his skin, you can rest your whole body and Hoseok wouldn't move an inch.

“Always worried, got to worry about Minnie. Always worried about everyone.” You mumble. Eyes closing.

The light comes through the windows all honey yellow, turning the bookshelves that Yoongi made gold instead of white. Turns the tops of Hobi’s hair a little red too, the brown has endless depths in the sunlight all burnt umber and Sienna where the sun hits, yellow ocher at the tips. The sunlight savors falling on Hobi, down to the last inch.

You try to keep your eyes open, struggling, and Hobi sets a hand on the top of your head, ruffling your hair lightly.

"Go back to sleep pup."

You hum, already half there. He pulls you a little on top of him, holding you with a firmness usually reserved for too-large packages and the tenderness reserved for very fragile very precious things. It makes your whole body feel tingly at the edges.

“Thanks for not leaving the nest when everyone else did,” you think he might be asleep for how long it takes him to answer. But everything in the last 24 hours has left you feeling like you don’t want to be alone, that you can’t be left by yourself. He breathes up and it presses against your stomach.

“Didn’t want to go with the others- just wanted to stay here in the nest with you.” nesting is a biological need for alphas as much as it is for omegas, Hobi hasn't felt so relaxed in ages.

He murmurs, hand still skimming through your hair. His thumb rolling against the nape of your neck and you shiver hard into the touch, sinking further into him. “Is that okay?”

Your hand finds a spot under his arm and you use it to tug yourself closer, getting your forehead against his shoulder, the headphones slipping from your ear.

“Yeah. It’s always okay.”

Hobi tucks your hair behind your ear and puts the headphones back in.

The next time you wake it’s because Noodle is licking at your forehead, grooming you, and you hear the shutter sound of Hobi’s camera, his small giggle. You swat at noodles face and he bats at you a little before settling on the small of your back, fighting Hobi for necessary real-estate and howling when he gets pushed off.

“Nu, be quiet,” Hobi’s hushed words are answered with an equally quiet meow that sends you straight off to dreamland again.

You don't know how long it's been, it could have been hours or minutes the next time you wake. You just know that Hobi smells good, smells musky sweet caramel all drippy and heady, that you've got your nose pressed up against his scent gland. All surrounded by it. Surrounded by him.

The next time you wake is not so innocent.

You’re a little too close. Cuddling with Hobi in a way that you might with Yoongi- with Namjoon or Jungkook. All warm snug hot. Bodies and dreams tangled so thoroughly that it's hard to tell where dreamy wants begin and fragile delights end.

You’re warm at your front from Hobi and warm on your back from the sunshine streaming through the window. Warm all the way through. Until he moves his hand and you realize that’s from him too. His fingers splayed over your spine.

You think you can be forgiven for confusing them. Hoseok and sunlight are one and the same.

The apex of your thigh is pressed tight to his hip just where his thigh starts. Your leg hitched over his hip and tight to it. The fabric of his sweatpants and the fabric of your pajama shorts are all bunched up from your movements. Your knee bent at a comfortable angle. His scent is heady in your nose, pressed to the low tugged collar of his shirt just over his heart.

As close as you can be but still not enough.

You don't even realize your hips are moving, sleepily grinding against his thigh until it's too late.

Hobi grabs your hips and groans.

You stop mid-movement, thoughts sloshing sleepy. And oh, you were moving, weren’t you? There is a dampness between your thighs and the scent of slick and arousal sharp in the air. That comfortable pleasure hiccup in your throat that says you want to cum and can. could like this.

You jerk back from the warmth in front of you, startled into wakefulness as you realize exactly you were just doing.

Oh no- you didn’t mean- Hobi. Alpha, warm and comfortable at your front.

You start to back up, still half asleep, but terror and embarrassment flood you like the ocean floods the sea rocks at high tide.

Hobi groans, a deep near growl sound, and moves before you can back up even an inch. he was just as asleep as you just were until you pulled away. His sleepy brain still clings to you.

His hands slip lower, holding you tight against his front. His sleepy alpha brain is malfunctioning. Sweet omega needs to stay close. The source of his warmth and the friction against his front cannot slip away.

His hands are on your ass and your pussy is pressed flushed to his hip, and Hobi-

Hobi is your best friend, Hobi is your packmate and Hobi has to be unaware of what he’s doing. You’re sure of it. You try to pull away again from him fighting back more embarrassment than you've ever felt in your entire life, hands pressed to his chest.

But He pulls you right back to him.

Right into a unmistakable hardness poking at your stomach. Hard and warm. Right where you were grinding in your sleep.

Hoseok’s heavy breath brushes your ear.

Instincts are incredibly hard to describe. The way they hook into your consciousness and separate reason from action and want from logic. The part of you that’s in control, that recognizes that you and Hobi shouldn’t be this close like this if it’s not talked about, is so distant.

A needy sound echoes that might be from you, that is from you, as Hobi’s hands slide up your hips and under his sweatshirt. Cold hands on your warm hips and oh-

Hobi’s eyes are cracked open, looking down at you, watching you with pink cheeks. Tongue darting out to lick at his lip. “S’okey you just-" his eyes flutter closed again; breath warm against your face. "You take what you need.”

It’s only a testament to the pack's care that you associate these things with each other. Safety and coziness are just so close to pleasure and comfort. Your sleepy body associates this kind of nesting with sex. it's only natural that you'd get a little needy while inside of it.

You can get needy, Hobi doesn't mind.

Before either of you can say if you really should, if this is really a good thing to do without talking about it first. Hobi’s hands are on your waist, pulling you back snug, his hard thigh between your legs.

If you were more awake, you’d think better of it, you’d think so much but there is only that sweet pressure. The drag, the wetness, the soft little huffs of breath that he shushes when he lets you take what you need. Helps you with his hands on your hips and guides you back into rocking against his thigh.

You feel it all the way down to your toes when his hands slide down to the curve of your ass then back up again, underneath the hem of your shorts and then your sweatshirt- his too (all of you his). Rucked up to your ribs.

“Soft.” Hobi groans.

This must not be real. This has to be a dream. Because Hobi doesn't want to touch you like this, Hobi doesn't groan and twitch against your stomach or guide the movement of your hips with his hands into a slow grind that has you gasping against his jaw. Hobi doesn’t leave the seat of your pajama bottoms soaked with slick. Hole clenching around nothing already. Utterly boneless where you lie against his front.

There is one single moment where you look at each other, one single moment where you try to keep from going any farther. Even though you want it, even though he wants it too. If Namjoon and Jin have taught you anything they've taught you caution.

Hoseok can smell the others lingering on your skin, the spot on the top of your head where Yoongi rested his cheek. He leans down, brushing his lips over it. It’s such a tender gesture and it breaks the flood and he's tugging you up, tugging you even closer, desperation coloring his voice all sweet.

“Fuck- please.” His forehead rests against yours, “fuck I just need-“

You're not sure who moves first, who starts the kiss only that once you’re kissing him it’s hard to stop. One second you're holding back and the next you're kissing him like he's Yoongi and he's kissing you like he's starving.

Teeth clanging against each other, harsh as they nip. Kissing so good that when you pull apart for breath you're both gasping and it has nothing to do with needing air.

Hobi has such nice lips it’s no wonder that they’re heart-shaped. Made for kissing, made for the needy needy licking against the seam of his lips. He shifts turning you on your side, surging up to kiss you properly and put his weight behind it. cradling your head with one hand and your side with the other. You’re so pliant, so willing to let him kiss and take. You want him to take everything. arms around his neck.

He breaks apart, forehead resting against yours, heart beating so quick that he can feel it in his palms. Pupiles blown when he blinks. “If you take what you need, and I take what I need- Can we-“

Your hands thread hard in his hair. Tugging him back to your lips. Closer and closer. “Fuck Yes- please-“

You don’t know where the wanting comes from, why it’s raging through you like a fire. His lips move against yours frantic, you bite his lip and he jerks. Hovering over you with your back against the nest, all tingly and fizzy. Your bones feel like champagne popping, like shooting stars burning out.

Hobi’s hands shake when they touch your hips, just like yours do when you mirror him, your touches shy but just as hungry, tugging up his shirt, fingertips and nails pressing bluntly to his happy trail of fine dark hair. You can feel the way his cock jumps against your stomach and thigh when you scratch gently.

You pull back a little and sit up and it’s sacred; the way that he panics, scrambling to hold onto you. You're A little bit shy when you take off his sweatshirt, nothing underneath. hair fluffing when you get it free from the cotton.

Your bare skin and the cold room. You get goosebumps on your arms almost instantly when they cross over your bare chest. Hobi’s breath stutters in his chest, like roman candles flare and settle. Hobi takes his sweatshirt from you and sets it aside in his haste to hold you again.

He starts to tugs his pants down, getting tangled because he won't even pull back an inch from you. You kiss his throat, again and again making up for lost time. Sucking a mark there. His hands fumble with the waistband of his tied tight grey sweatpants. finding the loops and then freeze when he feels wetness. Pulling back and looking down just to make sure that that is what he thinks it is. you stop your kissing and look too.

There is a wet spot, darkening the grey material. Your slick from your grinding, the spot where you got so worked up and felt so good that you couldn't even help it. He pulls back so that the light can kiss it but yeah that's definitely from you. Evidence of how much you want this. Evidence of how much you want him.

Hoseok thinks you might have actually set his body on fire. Is about ready to start checking your fingers for matches.

You blush so hot that you think you might be burning in embarrassment. Hands between your legs, clutching at the material of the nest, so embarrassed you can't watch as Hoseok looks down at it and then up at you.

“I’m sorry I- I can’t help it- I'm always-“

Hobi’s hands smooth over the wet patch, splaying up to cradle his cock where you’ve left your mark. And he looks at you, jaw rolling and eyes dark. He doesn’t say anything. Can’t.

It’s hasty how you both move to take his pants off, and he kicks them to some forgotten corner of the nest, his boxers pulled off too, and then clings to you. You cling to each other. Kissing again. Hands knotting through his hair and tugging.

You glance down and oh- Hobi has such a pretty cock. the prettiest in the pack maybe (don't tell Tae), Flushed at the tip, hair neatly trimmed and curving up.

Your bare thighs press to his adds a whole new level to this, the skin there is sensitive and unknown. Lying thigh to thigh somehow feels more intimate than chest to chest as you lie the way lovers do, your leg, his, then yours again.

You’re damp between your legs when he touches, hands shaking. He doesn't bother to take off your shorts just tugs the soaked bit of fabric to the side. It’s been a long time since he’s touched a pussy but he knows enough to do it gently. Petting over your folds like he’s teasing a flower to bloom and opening a rose for a bouquet.

“Please” you gasp, hand vicelike around his wrist. Kissing his frantic pulse again. Hot lips and a cold nose drag down his throat. You hiccup as the pads of his fingers find your clit, shaking against him. "Please-"

But you don’t need to ask, you don’t need to beg. Whatever you need Hobi will give it to you. Your hands scratch as his back when he presses close, snaking underneath his sweatshirt. Breath heavy.

He kisses your neck and bites it when his length brushes the wetness between your thighs. Hot and honey slick. his hips press to your hips, harsh lines of his thighs pointing low that you like. There is so much about Hobi that you like; the way that he kisses, the way that he touches. oh- it’s better than you imagined.

His knuckles are glossy with your slick when he curls them against the nest, holding himself up.

Hobi bends down to skim a kiss across your neck, your collarbones, your sternum.

You laugh, your giggle high and bright. He has to pull back, not upset at all but wanting to laugh too, giggling too. “Why are you?”

Your smile means everything to him. “Your hair tickles.” It is kind of fluffy, kind of pulled everywhere from your kissing and you run your fingers through it, scratching a little around the nape of his neck, and Hobi is done playing.

He pulls back, already dripping a bit of precum, silvery and pearl like at the head of his cock, standing against his stomach. a little hidden because he's still wearing his sweatshirt. Checking because he can’t not check.

“Is this- can I- fuck are you-“

“Daisy, please-“ Oh, how that pet name unhinges him.

He won't make you wait another second for it, hands shaking as he holds your hip. Shushing your needy whimpers with a soothing alpha rumble as he guides his cock close. Giving you what you both need.

Hoseok is not as big as Namjoon or Tae or Jimin, but he’s properly thick. Not the kind of thickness that knocks the breath out of you but the kind that fits just right. Not enough to make you ache or hurt even a little. It doesn’t hurt at all when he eases in slowly.

It doesn’t hurt at all.

That might be because of how soaked you are; dripping messy underneath the warm humidity of the blanket. The visual of your glossy pussy robbed from him but unimportant as Hobi stares at your face, resting his head against your forehead. Watching your eyes dilate and eyelashes flutter. “There we go- fuck-”

It’s not worth pulling back to separate how close you are. How good it feels to press his chest to your chest, not even a single inch separating you. His kisses go gentle and messy, moving against yours in a gentle rhythm just like his hips after he gives you a second to grow used to it. Rocking just a little.

Hoseok has heard the others talk about your pussy, those moments that he tried to block out at the beginning and then started to file away once loving you got more real. But for everything he's heard from his packmates, nothing compares to the reality.

The closeness. The way your hips fit. The hot- too much- clench around him.

He understands a little maybe, fully buried in you for the first time, why they talk about it so much. Why Jungkook had slipped it into dirty talk a few times with Namjoon and why it had made him growl and cum so quick. Why Tae had teased Yoongi for hogging you.

Your pussy feels like an inside joke in all the best ways, the kind of inside jokes that always have you feeling both known and loved. You can’t remember what you used to laugh about when you were a teenager and if asked Hoseok would fail to describe why sex with you feels so full. Why it feels like highlights and golden ages, the golden hour drenching you. It’s not sex for pleasure’s sake and it's not sex for closeness's sake either- although that’s part of it.

It’s not sex at all, it's making love. With Hobi, it’s making love from the beginning.

It's not instincts and mating bond urges. It’s not one submissive giving to a dominant. It’s not about protection and safety even though that's there or because you're an omega and he's an alpha. Because he's a man and you're a woman.

It's just love, that's it.

And it doesn’t hurt at all. For either of you.

The eye contact is never ending, his warm and fucked out the more he rocks. Gentle at first and building up frantic. Hobi doesn’t fuck like the rest of the pack does either; he doesn’t speak, letting out these quiet heavy breaths and shushing your squeaks with soothing alpha grumbles. His thumb wiping away the few overwhelmed tears that slip out and a smile swallowing your hiccuping breaths.

"Fuck” he breathes, moving his hips a little faster. His stomach presses to yours damp and tacky with sweat. Hoseok’s doesn't fuck in and out all the way, hardly moving away from you at all. Just rocking in deep.

Hobi doesn’t stop hitting every spot, comfortable with these unending rocks of his hips, maddening in the way that he never stops filling you. Never pulls out even half way.

Your hands weakly clench in the blankets of the nest as he twitches right there. That sensitive spot inside of you that feels like courting ecstasy when he nudges it. It’s the same spot that Yoongi likes to tease at, the spot that only his long fingers can reach properly and Tae’s too when she’s really trying. Ghosting over it and petting at it until you’re mad with pleasure.

But Hobi doesn’t tease, Hobi just gives. rubbing against it again and again with every gentle roll of his hips.

you put your hand over your mouth to quiet your whimpers when he pulls back, sitting up just a little. Holding your waist and forcing your body further down on his cock, nudging it as deep as it can go and you sob.

Hobi grins, a little cocky, a little pleased that despite his size compared to the others you're still equally as wrecked.

“Right there yeah?” he teases, and then rocks against it again. thumbs pressing against your stomach where he cradles you. waist so tiny that they almost meet when he holds you.

Your cheeks are hot, and you have to turn and whimper into the pillow. he lets you shift so that you're belly down in the nest and he's behind you glued to your backside. lying his weight down behind you like a blanket. pressing you into the nest where you'll stay like a good pup.

Hoseok instincts are absolutely purring. omega, getting bred in such a pretty nest. Good warm soft omega.

Your hand laces with the blanket, needing something to hold onto and he kisses the back of your neck, treading your hands together as he keeps going. This new position lets him rock in even deeper, putting his weight behind it.

“If you keep going, I’m not gonna be able to-”

His breath ghosts your ear, lips dragging down the column of your throat to nip and suck gently at your scent gland, marking you there. his hand presses, holding you to the bed as he rocks harder. His barely formed knot already inside and growing, getting you closer and closer as it thickens. Keeping him right there at the spot and you on the edge. You're so wet it's making noises, soaking and dripping down his cock.

He kisses your mating mark, nipping at it, and you’re gone.

You cum, a wet gush around his knot and a broken whimper. a growl in his throat sounds loud in the empty house. It sounds like made mate happy, made omega cum for me. Hoseok's Alpha is absolutely preening watching your Legs shake, the nape of your neck sweaty, body slack and head tilting to bear your neck. both of your bodies messy from it, filthy and blushing with love.

Hobi’s not far behind, rocking another time, a third, a quiet satisfied breath into the back of your neck before his knot pops locking you together as he cums so gently. No growls or gasps, just hot spurts that fill and satisfy you. Knot popping and Locking you so close you can feel his cock pulse. So close you can feel the same heartbeat on his lips when kisses you, hurried kisses pressed to the nape of your neck that quickly go slack with sleep.

Your hand settles across your stomach, and oh- you realize why hobi wasn't bothered by how wet he got you earlier. He just keeps cuming, so much that it's leaking a little around his knot. You're not sure that Jimin or Tae or Yoongi cum this much, Namjoon definitely does- but thats kinda proportional.

he just keeps going, heat flooding you. Maybe he's only cumming so much because it's the first time, and he needs to claim you from the inside out. you're a little too dizzy to figure it out.

You feel like you might pass out. You don't know if it's squirt or cum or just sweat when he lies himself over you. cuddling closer despite the mess. Teeth at your bared throat, Sucking softly, Soothing.

instincts are kind of embarrassing at best, irrationally hot at worse. you squirm a little closer so that his knot goes deeper.

The sunlight spills across your cuddled forms, still underneath the big thick blanket. He doesn’t pull out, the knot keeping him snug tight. His hand is on your cheek, rubbing up and down your jaw. He pulls the blanket up around you. And neither of you says a word as your rapid breathing calms.

You’re not sure who falls back asleep first. Only that he wraps his arm around you and pulls you back on top of his chest, cuddled there. Knot warm and safe inside of you.

knotted together like this, you're finally finally close enough.

~-~

When Hobi wakes you’re watching him and his dick is out. Wet and slick and cold.

That would certainly cause him to be alarmed if it wasn’t for your expression; a little pale. Hands between your legs and looking at the doorway.

You just really don't want to drip cum onto the couch, like- obviously. Hobi didn't hurt you. But the brief terror at waking up uncuddled and so suddenly douses Hobi like a bucket of cold water.

The cold might be the actual reason for his sudden wakefulness. The wintry air in the room is jarring because the house is finally heating up. (as much to do with the heating system doing its job as it is with your activities earlier that turned the windows all hazy with condensation).

It's like someone had just come in and then abruptly left again. Your cheeks are pink, and there is a cloth on the side of the couch, folded and warm. You didn't get it for yourself.

“Don’t freak out, but Yoongi and the others walked in while you were asleep.”

You’re kind of glad that he wasn’t awake to see your mate barely contain his screech, jumping up and down with Jungkook in the entryway. Namjoon’s subtly grinning expression when he took in your appearance and paused in the cold doorway breathing in deeply. Tae wrapped around one arm; their walk interrupted by his return from surgery.

He groans, barely awake enough to think about the visual that Yoongi and the others were treated to. The consequences are better than a shot of expresso at wakeing him up.

But really, was there ever a possibility that the others wouldn’t find out about this? Does Hoseok even want them not to know?

He's too tired, too think about this logically.

Hoseok wonders why he didn’t wake to you holding him. He’s seen you hold the others, hold Namjoon in the morning when you smell like him. The way you wake slowly and run your fingers through their hair. The other alphas have a habit of cuddling up to rest their head against your chest. Hobi remembers that day by the beach when you pet his hair, he wants you to do that now.

But he can't fucking ask. Asking you to cuddle him would be fucking embarrassing.

“Shit." He shakes off his neediness and easily locates his boxers in the mess of the nest because they're bright red. Surreptitiously tucking his now soft and deflated knot back inside. You look away, letting him have that moment of privacy without comment. Your arms curl around your chest, you’re still nude from the waist up. thighs clenched togeather.

“Yeah uhm, they went back out to like- give us some space.”

"Did they say anything?"

You look away, wiggling over to the edge of the nest. "No. But they looked like they wanted to say a whole lot.”

You definitely don’t say that you heard their scuffle, Namjoon and Tae using their alpha privileges to wrangle an overly excited Yoongi and Jungkook. or that both of them had come back inside, both with pink cheeks smelling sweet at the sight of Hobi’s face pressed to your neck and the fresh hickeys at your throat.

(Hobi’s hickeys are always so small and cute. Tae can’t wait to take a picture and save it, for memory's sake. She’s half tempted to take out her phone and snap a picture of the two of you now.)

Your hiss of “Don’t say anything, I swear to fucking god if you wake him-" cured her of any bad ideas and had Namjoon grinning, his dimples showing.

Yoongi’s finger pressed to his lips in the doorway. Smiling wide and showing his gums. Omegas do get awfully protective over alphas in their nests. Especially post-knotting.

You’re honestly a little surprised that their muted shouting hadn’t woken Hobi. The closed door had kept out the cold but not the sound of them discussing on the porch; mostly Tae's insistence that they needed to get out of the house for lunch instead of heading back inside.

“But what if they need aftercare?”

"We shouldn’t leave them alone and unprotected.” (Classic Joonie).

“Yeah! What if they need cleaning!”

Yoongi snorts, “Gross Jk- I’m pretty sure the last thing they want is you licking up Hobi’s cum.”

“But he always likes it when it’s Jinnie-" that had your face and body heating (although that could just be Hobi- a literal furnace that he is wrapped around you).

Now his warmth is on the other side of the nest yet it feels impossibly farther away. As you both stew in silence under the weight of what you’ve done, what you just did.

Everything feels quiet and scary as you put yourselves back together in silence. You use the wet washcloth to keep yourself from dripping all over the couch while he looks for his pants in the mess of blanekts that smell like sex.

Thoughts like shit shit shit and what have you done ping-ponging back and forth across his brain. Mind bouncing between unlikely personal regrets and likely female rejection (of which he is only too familiar with).

Hobi doesn't like feeling rejected, it always brings up bad memories. He didn't wake up to you holding him. Is that a rejection or is his brain just making it up? People always hold each other after sex. Don't they?

You reach for his sweatshirt but before you can touch it a growl bursts forth from his throat and you freeze.

Hoseok scrubs a hand across his eyes, trying to wipe away the memories fitfully. Maybe it’s just because of the fact that he woke up and you weren’t wrapped around him. He's going to have to cuddle you himself if he wants it right now.

This first time with you reminds him of other first time's that didn’t end well. He's sorry for it the second it slips past his lips.

“Sorry, I don’t know why I just- my fucking instincts feel like they're on fire."

“So can I…?” you trail off. Your skin has goosebumps again. And Hoseok doesn’t know if it’s the casual nakedness that has him feeling so unmoored. A blush trailing its way up the back of his neck even though it shouldn’t be weird. He saw you shirtless every other hour during Namjoon’s rut for Christ’s sake.

“Yeah, just wear it- please wear it.” He can’t take back his growl, but he can meditate by watching you pick it up and hug it to your chest. Looking at him for a second as if to check that it’s still alright and he’s not going to snap at you again.

There is a hickey on your shoulder, the spot where it meets your arm. Hobi doesn’t know if it’s from him or someone else. It's a little too red to not be new. You don’t look uncomfortable being nude in front of him.

If anything, you look a little bit glowy.

You look at him and then pull it over your head. His cheeks still heating stubbornly as your chest moves a little, jiggling.

Why do girls have to just- girl all the time- it's honestly a little unfair how much hobi blushed.

He watches you, sitting on the edge of the bed in nothing but his boxers as you stand up pulling the sweatshirt down your hips. He stares at you until you ask a little flustered by hiding it, “What?”

He tugs on the hem of his sweatshirt, slowly, carefully, leaning forward as he tugs on one of the strings with his teeth. His hands go to your waist pulling you close gently, half sure of himself and half afraid. Hoseok is always somehow half afraid. Is this allowed? Is this wanted?

He rests his head against your stomach, loosely twining his arms around your waist to pull you closer, still loose enough that you can step away if you want. All of this can stop if you don’t want it. He hopes you know that.

Hoseok looks down at your feet, not at your face. “I love it when you wear my clothes. I really don't know where that came from.”

“Careful,” you say, a grin in your voice. Your tone light because you don't want him to smell so sour again. “I’m gonna go for your pants next.”

You snatch his from the floor and dart away. Nothing excites an alpha’s instincts like a chase, and Hobi feels the fire light down his spine. His movements are a hunt-heavy blur. Brain honed in on you.

He catches you by the counter, your giggle echoing off the high ceilings. His blood heating again as he drags you by your hips and flops down into one of the bar stools, sitting you on top of him with a growl.

His hands grip hard around your waist, determined until he’s shy. Letting you go softly, “Sorry I just-”

“Instincts still? Don't worry I get it.” You give him his pants and sit up off his lap so that he can put them on. And now is not the time to get another boner Hobi- but it’s kind of hard not to when you smell so bred, so wholly satisfied.

Hobi did that. Hobi's the one who made you look like this drowning in the afterglow.

Your own instincts are telling you that you want to take the blankets from the couch and drag them upstairs, and tuck them in around the scents of the others. So that they can all see and smell how good you made your alpha feel.

Hoseok’s pleasure leaves an undercurrent to the air that’s intoxicating. Half sugar-sweet and musky alpha. Your body hums with it as he steps up close behind you, close enough you can feel his warmth and not his body, nose skimming the bruise he left close to your mating mark. Letting out a tired sigh.

You did just work off a lot of energy, regardless of the half-nappy half-cuddle fucking that just was; It's also left you fucking hungry.

As much as the kitchen has been a place of anxiety for you it really isn’t with Hobi there. There is still that tape line on the floor that guards you off from the stove, sink, and the fridge. Hobi steps out from behind you and goes to the fridge, getting out some of the prepped fruit that Yoongi almost always keeps on hand.

But you keep looking at the kitchen, the pans hanging above the sink, your mixer sitting dusty in the corner. The hanging mugs. Everything.

He brings it to you, setting it down in front of where you sit. instincts making his eyes fever bright. He watches a little too intently as you lift a raspberry to your mouth. Something about watching you eat cools his instincts, making him release a taught breath.

He watches as you lift another piece, a blackberry to your lips and bite down. Almost purring, too afraid of what might slip out if he speaks. He half wants to do it himself and feed you from his fingertips. But that’s a little too embarrassing to consider.

A minute later, after you’ve eaten half a dozen more pieces, he reaches past you, about to get a piece of peach. He doesn't think anything of it, but when he reaches past your face- you flinch.

It happens so quick that he almost doesn’t even catch it. One second your cheek is turned straight and the next your eyes are darting from him to the bowl. Scent souring with fear and memories from Geumjae.

Fuck. (No cuz actually- fuck Geumjae.)

You don’t look at him with fear, you just look at him with a strange sort of sadness in your eyes. Sorry. Like you’re sorry for being scared. hoseok's hand goes tight on the counter.

"I'm sorry."

Hobi sits down. Holds your hands in his, and waits for a second before he speaks. makes his words quiet and gentle because anger at someone dead and gone has no place here.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” You have nice hands, warm where they press into his. And he cradles them, your knuckles flexing vaguely in his grasp, gentle but commanding.

“You’ll try not to, you mean."

You smile at him sadly. Hobi’s chest is tight with it. He needs you to know how much he means those words. How much he needs to mean them. But you both know how hard it is to promise that.

"No. I mean I’m not going to hurt you. Ever.” He repeats. You smile at him sadly again. And he knows his brief anger earlier when you touched his sweatshirt- usually such a normal thing for you- didn't escape you at all. But grief and mourning and memory always finds you at the worst times; after first times and on sunny winter afternoons.

The two of you are a mess, bodies teeming with the memories of failed loves, lost and broken. But you can ignore your triggers; such innocuous things as you wearing his sweatshirt and him reaching past your face. You can ignore your memories; the wretched and rotten ones, just for today.

You let the heavy moment pass and look at the other side of the kitchen. Hobi’s chest feels tight with something. Something that he needs to say but can’t just yet. You can only tell someone you love them for the first time once. You don’t get a second chance.

Hobi just wants to get it right.

You’re looking at the kitchen that Yoongi made for you, holding his hand still. using the other to feed yourself more fruit.

(Is there anything more intimate than holding hands with someone? It feels like more than the pads and lines of his fingers are pressed to yours. soul to soul and palm to palm. The future is written out right there but you ignore it. Love line, health line, fate. But the two of you are dedicated to writing your own end. Your love line is exactly the same length as his, not a millimeter longer).

Hoseok’s chest is still all tight. “What are you thinking about?”

“I haven’t made anything in months.” You sigh, sad. “I want to. I used to love baking, I used to-” you break off, sorrow making you quiet.

Hobi’s eyes are fixed on your shoulder. There are freckles there. He’s not sure why he’s never noticed them before or that you’ve got them dotting your back.

Hobi swallows past something in his throat. Pushing you gently from your chair until you're standing next to him. Cupping your waist because now that he's started touching you it's hard to stop. Now that he knows he’s allowed to touch you so casually, so affectionately, he going to keep doing it.

“Go. I’ll watch you, make sure you stay safe.” Because that’s the rule, isn’t it? Not that you can’t be in the kitchen at all, just that you need someone there to keep you safe.

The words feel tight in his throat, not easily said. I love you. He thinks as he watches you move to the mixer with a small but pretty smile that looks like daisies have taken root on your skin, everything sweet and flowering.

I love you. He thinks as he watches you get your cookbook from behind the mixer. I love you he thinks when he watches you place a mug from that morning in the sink. I love you he thinks as you get the sugar, the vanilla, the salt. He has to get up and get the flour for you, unwilling to have your arms strain underneath the heavy container, doting on you just because he can.

Just because he wants to, just because he loves you.

The shadow of what’s left on the bag hits his dark clothes like a ghostly outline when he holds it. The flour is a bit like you; everywhere he touches it leaves an impression. The rainbows from his suncatcher you put in the kitchen shift with the angle of the sunlight, winking out one by one as dusk falls.

He sits at the kitchen island and watches as you hum and flick through your recipe book. Golden hour fades to orange and pink the same way that roses fade.

He’s not sure why he blurts it out, why he asks, “What’s your favorite?”

You look up from your cookbook, everything is set out but still, the recipe is undecided. “What?”

Hobi can not look at you for this, instead looks at the kitchen island and the old butcher block countertop. Fingers toying along the edge where a knife left a gash.

“You always make everyone else’s favorites; Namjoon’s honey cakes, coffee-flavored things for Jin, the vegan stuff for Jungkook you know- but-” his eyes flick up to you in a moment of bravery. “What’s yours? What's your favorite?”

You think for a moment, a kitchen apart, fingers tapping on the countertop and Hobi can’t take his eyes off of you. His body feels a little achy but in that ‘was just fucked good’ sort of way that makes his breath deeper. Quieting some alpha part of him that always wants a little more. A little more scenting, a little more validation, a little more attention.

But everything can wait.

“My favorite thing to eat or my favorite thing to make?”

“Both. Either.” You glance at the clock. Going to the pantry for a second to double-check that you have everything you'll need. “I’ll have to make some of it from scratch but-" you look at him. “Do you have time?”

Hobi nods. “As long as you need.”

Hobi watches as you measure out the flour and sift it. Hobi watches as you wait for the eggs to get to room temperature and fucks with the playlist. His phone will eventually get splashed with coco but- it’s okay.

All of this is okay, all of this is I love you I love you I love you and I don’t know what to do with all of it, can you take someone it, please. I don’t have enough space in my body to hold all of it. Hoseok doesn’t speak for how sheer the impulse is just to blurt it out.

The yellow plastic mixing bowl keeps clattering against the counter as you stir the egg yolks until they froth up and fizz. Pouting you turn your eyes to him. “Can you help?”

Hoseok has to swallow back the words before they slip past. Hopping up a little too quickly. “Yeah of course.”

You don’t tell him what you’re making, let him guess. So many of your recipes need egg whites and vanilla. You let him put it together on his own. Hobi doesn’t peek at your recipe book and spoil the surprise.

Every action, every spoonful of sugar is I love you too, just say it. You don’t talk about the sex you just had and you don’t say I love you to him. You wait for him to say it first. You don’t say a thing besides; “Just a half teaspoon of that; drizzle it a little at a time, or else it clumps together. Good.” Hobi’s cheeks heat with every bit of praise and you have a lot of it for him.

Hobi looks away when you look up from the bowl, oh so carefully folding the batter and egg whites together. So gently that the hiss and bubble of whipped egg yolks disintegrating is hardly audible.

Hobi hasn’t baked since he was a kid; since he got into his head that chocolate chip cookies were totally something that an eight-year-old should be able to make on their own without adult supervision and almost burned his parents’ apartment to the ground. He tells you the story and you laugh.

He can tell that you’re making adjustments as you go. Adding in a bit of cinnamon, piping off the cookies in neat little lines, and then tapping them oh so carefully to get rid of the bubbles.

The stove preheats and then the tray goes in, filling the room with your scent. That cakey baking aroma that has him resting his head back against the cabinets when you sit on the floor and greedily breathing in.

You wait the 30 minutes like that, sitting on the floor between the cabinets and stove. Your feet pressed to his knees and a glass of lemonade between the two of you.

“You really like baking,” he says, and your eyelashes flutter, you must be getting tired. He takes your feet into his lap, using his hand to massage up your calf. Smiling when you sigh.

“Yeah, it makes me feel- I don’t know. I like making the world sweeter, just a little. Even if it’s just my little corner of it. Making things you guys like makes me happy too.”

“You know, you could go to culinary school if you wanted.” Hobi gets a little shy because you hadn’t explicitly told Jin and Namjoon not to tell anyone about your plans or your application (still pending). It will be a few more weeks until you find out, but that change is just on the horizon.

He's already seen Jimin perusing expensive leather bookbags and has overseen a recommendation letter coming from Namjoon’s email. Hobi might have read it for him to double-check because Hobi always notices things the others might gloss over. Jin and Tae had given it proof read too.

You make a noise in your throat, halfway between a hum in approval and a hum in distaste. “I don’t know, it seems like- a lot to do for a hobby.”

Hobi and you are the only two in the pack who wanted to go to college but didn’t. Couldn’t in your case because Geumjae wouldn’t let you and flunked out in his. He gets the lack of clarity in your voice; to go back or not go back. To try again or not try at all and not worry about whether or not you’re enough.

“I already started applying anyway. Namjoon and Jin and Tae put a lot of effort into helping me apply and-” You let out a frustrated sigh.

Hobi shakes his head, “Doesn’t matter. You can change your mind.” There is always time. You tap your toes against his shins and he grabs your feet and you jerk, ticklish. And he almost almost gives in to the urge to tell you he loves you right then and there.

“But could you be happy? Doing this all the time?” You turn, putting your hand over your eyes to peer into the oven and make sure that the ladyfingers are rising properly. “Doing it every day? Would it make you happy?”

You pause, hand on the door before replying in a small voice. “Yeah, maybe. Maybe I could be happy.”

You stand with a crack of your knees, sticking out your hand for Hobi and almost falling into him when he truly uses your hand to help himself up.

“Come on, we’ve got to make the whipped cream next-”

It goes like that, you both talking, and Hobi fucking with the playlist. Thinking three little words and not saying them.

You let the ladyfingers cool for a few minutes while you make the expresso. Dunking them in quickly. Piping out the honey-flavored whipped cream in sticky little dollops. Shaking out the cocoa with a practiced hand.

You make the caramel for the top last. Sugar-burning, glass-like little strands on top for a bit of crunch.

The tiramisu is a delicate creation, the layers perfectly spaced out in just the right ratio of cream to chocolate. You let it sit for a second in the fridge and when you take it out, you cut it into a single perfect little square and put it on a plate for him. Treading over the blue painter’s tape line and lingering by him where he sits.

“Try it.” You ask and he does obediently.

Hobi takes a bite of it, rolling the flavors around his tongue while you watch. You haven’t cut a piece for yourself just yet, but you have a fork. You stand on the other side of the kitchen island and take a bite from the other corner of the pan, humming happily when the taste hits your tongue.

It really is your favorite. You grin at the plate, “I could finish this whole thing in one sitting.”

Hobi takes another bite. It’s really good, the flavors are simple but delicate, each of them identifiable but yet cohesive. He could eat all of it too.

Hoseok swallows and realizes why it's your favorite; It tastes like all of you- like the pack.

The honey whipped cream is Jin and Jungkook, and the chocolate cocoa on top is your mate; dark chocolate like an Oreo cookie. Hobi thinks it might not be normal cocoa. The homemade ladyfingers are soaked through with Namjoon's coffee and the cake itself is a delicate dance of Tae’s cinnamon, Jimin’s vanilla, and your scent too. Buttery and yummy.

He's finished half of what's on his plate before he realizes that you added the crunchy layer on top, the caramel too.

That’s Hobi isn’t it? The Burnt sugar sweetness. He knows that’s not typical but still, you added in anyway. The smell of caramel is thick in the air. Sweet sweet sweet. Hobi always smells the sweetest when he’s falling in love.

The tiramisu tastes like the whole pack. Like love soaked threw. Hobi’s heart and body is full of it.

He thinks this might be his favorite too.

Hobi tries to blink back the wetness, really tries not to cry as he takes another big bite. He gets a little bit of whipped cream on his lip, licking it and sniffling. You pause, a bite hovering between the plate and your mouth before you set down your fork with a clink.

“Oh Hobi”

The space between you is nothing more than air as you quickly head around the kitchen island. You cup both of his cheeks and he sags into the touch, hands instantly going over yours to keep them there. Tears spilling warm and unabated down his cheeks.

Hobi decides right then he is beyond pretending that he doesn’t want it, that he doesn’t want you. Wet cheeks and imploring eyes.

“Oh Hoseok, what’s wrong?”

You’re standing between his legs and your collarbone rests against his cheek. Your hand runs through his hair and his heart pulses hard.

"I didn’t mean to make you cry. If this is because-” you trail off. You don’t say that you shouldn’t have had sex earlier because you can’t find it in yourself to regret this even a little bit. But you are sorry for not doing it in a way that didn't make him cry. If that's why he's crying.

“No it’s not that. I just-" Hoseok can hardly speak his mouth is so full of love that it bursts from him before he has a chance to think it through. Sobbing a little as he says it;

"I'm crying because I love you and I don’t know how to tell you.”

Hobi stutters and your hands on his cheeks go firm for a second before they relax. “I love you; I love being around you, I love that you're my best friend and that i get to love you too. I love living in this house with you. I’m crying because for the first time I get it-”

He can’t stop the confession now that it's started, and if he'd just open his eyes he'd get to see your smile but they're screwed shut tight.

“I get it, I get why once Yoongi met you, he couldn’t leave. I understand why he brought you back to us. But-” he hiccups and you giggle a little at the sound. His eyes shoot open and he realizes that you're crying too- that you haven't stepped away. You wipe away his tears with your thumbs and grin down at him.

“I'm so fucking afraid too- I can’t help but feel like the way we started just- fucked everything up. I fucked everything up back then by being jealous. I look at you and I’m scared I’ll fuck this up.”

You hold his face in your hands and think; I will be gentle with you, I will be gentle with you even if it kills me. You have never loved someone broken like you, and you know how easy it is to make a wrong step. But you’re sure when you say the words anyway.

“You won’t.”

“But-” you kiss his hands, knuckles, fingertips. His forehead, his lips Everything. Your eyes are focused and Hobi can’t look away.

“You won’t, you promised not to hurt me and you won’t.”

He falls silent, and you pull him in close. His lips still tingle from your kiss and you kiss him again, long and lingering, hard with the force of your conviction. It tastes like tiramisu.

When you break apart, Hoseok rests his ear on your heart and listens.

You should say I love you back, you really should return the words. But you think there will be other moments to say them. You'll say it when you wake up with him tomorrow morning, you'll say it when you fall asleep tonight curled close to him. There will be more time to say them- during a late-night drives when you look over at him in the dark. There are always going to be more times to say it and you’ll say it and mean it every time.

Unfortunately, life isn't so neat and tidy.

You wipe his cheeks and he wipes yours and you both giggle, leaning into each other. You get him a tissue for his nose and start laughing all over again. Being with Hobi will always be like this, half your lover and half your best friend.

“Do you want to go on a drive later, only,” you wipe tears from your own eyes, “want to take the others this time?”

He smiles, “That’s the best idea you’ve ever had.”

He tries to pull you in for another kiss but you feed him a bite of tiramisu instead and it gets half on his cheek, “finish your cake alpha,” you command, and Hobi is perilous to disobey. the next bite you take ends up on your cheek too because he tickles you, and you blush when he leans forward to lick it off your cheek. All giggly and happy and close. You sat practically on the edge of the counter. Noodle meows and laps up some of it from the floor.

You don’t need to say I love you back, you already have. Hobi can taste it on the edge of every bite.

You cut him another piece and share it this time, and he can't stop looking at you, can't stop smiling.

You smile around a mouthful, "i'm gonna tear up that train ticket."

"Don't you fucking dare. We've gotta like- put it in a scrap book or something."

You clean up the tiramisu, thinking of what might happen when the pack gets back, thinking of how things will go now that you’ve settled this. They’ll be happy; all of you all together finally. This last piece of your little family finally falling into place.

Maybe it will go like this:

Maybe when the pack gets home, there will not just be tiramisu on the counter. Maybe there will be gluten-free lemon bars and honey cakes. Chocolate ginger cookies dusted with powdered sugar and freshly baked bread with cheese and garlic. Little personal cheesecakes that you made in a muffin tin dotted with jam preserve because now that you’ve started to bake again there might not be anything to stop you.

You already feel the urge in your hands, the urge to make things. You think it might have been learned from Yoongi.

Maybe they’ll come home with pizza, unsure if a party and alcohol is really the proper way to go about celebrating, but the cake from the bakery that Tae will buy as a joke, will have flowery lettering and “congrats for losing your Hobi-ginity"

It will make you laugh until your lungs ache like the fireworks have gone off. Will make him blush and rub the back of his neck in shyness.

When they come home there might be a few sly comments but the pack knows when to tease and when not to. Maybe Namjoon will take a hearty sniff at Hoseok’s throat, dragging it up and down the nape of his neck, huffing happily. (Namjoon has always been a little bit possessive of Hoseok the same way Jin has always been possessive of you, but that's pack alpha's for you).

Tae will tuck your hair behind your ears to get a better look at the mark he left on your throat, manicured fingers gently stroking over it. and Yoongi will shoot him a challenging look and drawl, "really daisy? is this really something you wanna start?" all playful. the way yoongi only gets when he's really really happy.

And when Jin gets home, Maybe he’ll drag you over his lap with some squirming because there is no avoiding this hole check. Not when Jin and the others have been waiting.

Under the hungry eyes of the rest of the pack, you would still squirm. Your mate watching and grinning as he nibbles a piece of pizza and just watches as Jin pulls your sleep shorts down to your knees. Leaving them there to pin your thighs together. Hand against the small of your back to keep you still.

Of course, the pack omega has to look after the two of you and make sure the lowest on the hierarchy is being safe without a stronger presence nearby. But your entrance is pink fucked warm, not red and inflamed. Hoseok’s knot is the perfect thing to warm you up, and Jin tugs his sweatshirt over your hips to keep you warm as he examines you.

Fingers drag your entrance apart to show the others how good hobi did. Prompting them to touch and feel for themselves, all of their fingers teasing at your entrance and all of them touching you. Tae and Jungkook holding your thighs, Jimin and Namjoon resting their hands on your ass to help jin hold you open better and yoongi prodding to feel-

They'd want to see his cum slip out, forced from your hole by your needy clench. Of course, they'd just fuck it back inside because not a drop can go to waste. one set of fingers and then another, jungkook leaning down to taste.

Jin’s eyes would be all dark eyes and honey tones, looking hoseok up and down, cheeks as red as the sweatshirt you wear. His praise makes Hobi feel just a little bit too proud for his own good.

Hobi would probably get a knot-check for that, because if the alpha has something to be proud of then surely the others need to check his ego (and only in the way that hobi likes).

The alphas would scuffle with him a little, wrestling to settle him. Hobi's instincts are still fever bright and he needs to be put in his place. To feel the pack for what they are; very necessary safety bumpers.

He'd go so easily after a few nips- Jimin would help pull his pants down so Namjoon could get his big hands around him, fingers teasing at the red skin around his base and making Hobi growl and gasp. Pausing to cup lower and make sure Hoseok's empty, that he didn't hold back breeding you. Tae would tutt and make him open his mouth, her finger teasing along his teeth just for shits and giggles. Just to make him groan.

Nothing makes an alpha more proud than getting to show off his teeth.

Jin would smile at the display, and croon. “Good alpha.”

Maybe Jin will pat your pussy lips softly before pulling your pants up, making you flinch and then relax and jungkook would bend down to give Hoseok's knot a little kiss before standing.

The whole thing would take maybe 5 minutes but it would leave the whole pack ravenous for more. The final evidence of this finally happening; all of you together and not fragmented.

As you should be, together.

Maybe later, after treats and pizza, you'll all get to go to the beach like Hobi promised. Two separate cars. And Namjoon might let Hoseok and Jimin do donuts in the empty parking lot without too much fuss. The smell of tires and gasoline ripping.

Jungkook whooping and Yoongi watching on with his grin, Jin in the back seat with you going “Oh- oh hope- slow down” looking a little green. But terrorizing the pack omega is kind of your job.

It’s cold and late at night but you’ll tear out across the sand. Running to the shore. Tossing your shoes into the dark and toeing into the waves. Yelling happy.

You and Hobi will try and throw Yoongi into the water and then the other alphas will actually succeed in throwing Namjoon, pushing him until he inevitably tumbles into the seafoam. All 7 of you will try and wrangle Jungkook into the same wet fate and fail.

Jin will tuck Namjoon’s wet hair back behind his ear and grin at him, his grin saying the words they don’t need to. Kisses tases like secrets and salt but that much has not changed. Might never change when it comes to the eight of you. All the secrets in the world couldn’t keep you apart.

You’ll get zoomy in the way that dogs get in wide-open spaces. You’ll run. Your feet slapping against the sand, tossing spray into the air as high as your laughter, chasing after each other. A bunch of barefoot kids in too-big bodies and sand between your toes. Hands clasped tight in each other’s so that you won’t let go. You won’t ever let go now that you've found them.

For once you'll be absent of all the things that drag you down. Lighter than the warm air that billows over the sea. Mouths that store special secret salty smiles for the better. Damp fingers that curl against warm wrists. holding onto each other tight even though you’re running and running-

Running.

Maybe.

But that’s not what happens. Instead, what happens is this;

You are sitting at the kitchen counter when Hobi gets a text. It’s from Jungkook asking about the pizza types that you’d want and

Yoongi’s left his phone, he says with a little 👀 emoji. But he won’t truly tease the both of you until he gets home. Of course Yoongi was too distracted by you and Hobi post coitous to grab it from the other room.

you to to the pantry to put away the flour and this close- you can hear another phone ring from the bathroom. It's it yours? Only No, it's not your phone sitting on the counter, but Yoongi’s. Lighting up with Jin’s contact information.

JinJinJin: 5 missed calls.

It's so like your mate to leave his phone in such a random place. You smile as you pick up.

Jin is already talking a mile a minute. Fear and panic make his words come quick and desperate.

“Yoongi- why the fuck didn't you pick up" You don't have time to respond. Don't have time to let him know it's not your mate but you that picked up the phone.

"I don’t know how the fuck it happened, I don’t know- but-“ he’s almost shouting over the phone, such raw panic in his voice that it has your body going frozen.

Jin lets out a broken sobbing breath.

"I shot Minnie.”

~-~

Please Like, Comment, and Reblog <3 Every little bit of encouragement helps <3

Come tell me what you liked about this chapter!

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~-~

Notes:

I ended up editing out a good portion of Hoseok ’s inner monologue at the begining, because I realized that at that point in time with the other pack he wouldn’t have been thinking stuff about how terrible it was because it wasn’t terrible yet. i probably should have even edited it fluffier if we're being honest. i think that would have been more unsettling.

The line where she says “One second you're holding back and the next you're kissing him like he's Yoongi and he's kissing you like he's starving.” Is a little hard to explain, she’s not thinking about Yoongi in that moment but the person she associates the most with love is Yoongi so- yeah it made sense. I feel like this line might make people go a little like “what??”

I swear if you guys didn’t cry a little at the ‘It doesn’t hurt at all.’ Parts I’m not doing this right because I was SOBBING.

Listen, I almost edited out the line where he calls her pussy an inside joke so many times- but for me- when I was younger I always wanted to be a part of inside jokes because like- if you are that means you’ve got history with someone- Hoseok is thinking this because until this moment- he hasn’t been able to be apart of something that the rest of the pack had understood.

When Hoseok was leaving a hickey over her mating mark it’s his way of saying “this is mine too 😠” to Yoongi,

Honestly??? Why is Hobi so feral in this like- he’s a /little/ unhinged from how much he wants her and tbh it’s fair. Look away if you don’t wanna read him going APESHIT for her.

ALSO- I’m just imagining him on the walk with jungkook and Tae, cheeks slowly pinking up because he can feel that they’re having sex down the mating bond, maybe getting hard and the others noticing, both of them plastering themselves along his side and teasing him with words like “do you think he’s making her all wet and messy hyung? Do you think she’s gonna cream around his cock like she creams around yours?” and Yoongi just- endlessly suffering around the two horndogs that are Tae on estrogen and jungkook on a regular day.

The moment where they’re holding hands and it’s talking about palmistry is a refrence to noah kahan’s song everywhere everything and the line “it’s been a long year, in all of our books pages dog eared, we write out the ends on our palms dear, and forget to read.”

The worst worst worst part about this chapter is that I don’t??? have a fucking recipe for the tiramisu?? Like I’ve made it before but I’ve never made honey flavored whipped cream or put caramel on top 🥺 maybe I’ll test it out one dayand update this chapter

Okay so the ‘flash into the improbable future at the end is a little too horny for the end of smutt but I couldn’t just /not/ put it in there because you know how I love a good hole check scene.

do you hate me because of this cliffhanger? even i have to say its a little unforgivable.

please be patient for next chapter because i do not have A SINGLE fucking word written for it. like nada, we're starting from scratch come monday.

~-~

Hobi's sex Playlist (jk isn't not a sex playlist)

Dominic fike- Mama's boy (hobis' flashback)

Mitski – my love mine all mine. (yoongi telling him to be good)

Lana del ray – chemtrails over the country club. (the sex)

Olivia Rodrigo – can’t catch me now (when they're both triggered from the respective abusive relationships)

Tom o’dell – black Friday. (Juz cuz)

[trendfilmsetter]

Apple Music’s ‘100 Best Albums of All Time’ list:

#1. Lauryn Hill — The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill

#2. Michael Jackson — Thriller

#3. The Beatles — Abbey Road

#4. Prince & The Revolution — Purple Rain

#5. Frank Ocean — Blonde

#6. Stevie Wonder — Songs in the Key of Life

#7. Kendrick Lamar — good kid, m.A.A.d city

#8. Amy Winehouse — Back to Black

#9. Nirvana — Nevermind

#10. Beyoncé — Lemonade

#11. Fleetwood Mac — Rumours

#12. Radiohead — OK Computer

#13. Jay-Z — The Blueprint

#14. Bob Dylan — Highway 61 Revisited

#15. Adele — 21

#16. Joni Mitchell — Blue

#17. Marvin Gaye — What’s Going On

#18. Taylor Swift — 1989 (Taylor’s Version)

#19. Dr. Dre — The Chronic

#20. The Beach Boys — Pet Sounds

#21. The Beatles — Revolver

#22. Bruce Springsteen — Born to Run

#23. Daft Punk — Discovery

#24. David Bowie — The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders From Mars

#25. Miles Davis — Kind of Blue

#26. Kanye West — My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

#27. Led Zeppelin — Led Zeppelin II

#28. Pink Floyd — The Dark Side of the Moon

#29. A Tribe Called Quest — The Low End Theory

#30. Billie Eilish — WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO?

#31. Alanis Morissette — Jagged Little Pill

#32. The Notorious B.I.G. — Ready to Die

#33. Radiohead — Kid A

#34. Public Enemy — It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back

#35. The Clash — London Calling

#36. Beyoncé — BEYONCÉ

#37. Wu-Tang Clan — Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)

#38. Carole King — Tapestry

#39. Nas — Illmatic

#40. Aretha Franklin — I Never Loved a Man the Way I Love You

#41. OutKast — Aquemini

#42. Janet Jackson — Control

#43. Talking Heads — Remain in Light

#44. Stevie Wonder — Innervisions

#45. Björk — Homogenic

#46. Bob Marley & The Wailers — Exodus

#47. Drake — Take Care

#48. Beastie Boys — Paul’s Boutique

#49. U2 — The Joshua Tree

#50. Kate Bush — Hounds of Love

#51. Prince — Sign O’ the Times

#52. Guns N' Roses — Appetite for Destruction

#53. The Rolling Stones — Exile on Main St.

#54. John Coltrane — A Love Supreme

#55. Rihanna — ANTI

#56. The Cure — Disintegration

#57. D’Angelo — Voodoo

#58. Oasis — (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?

#59. Arctic Monkeys — AM

#60. The Velvet Underground & Nico — The Velvet Underground and Nico

#61. Sade — Love Deluxe

#62. 2Pac — All Eyez on Me

#63. The Jimi Hendrix Experience — Are You Experienced?

#64. Erykah Badu — Baduizm

#65. De La Soul — 3 Feet High and Rising

#66. The Smiths — The Queen Is Dead

#67. Portishead — Dummy

#68. The Strokes — Is This It

#69. Metallica — Master of Puppets

#70. N.W.A — Straight Outta Compton

#71. Kraftwerk — Trans-Europe Express

#72. SZA — SOS

#73. Steely Dan — Aja

#74. Nine Inch Nails — The Downward Spiral

#75. Missy Elliott — Supa Dupa Fly

#76. Bad Bunny — Un Verano Sin Ti

#77. Madonna — Like a Prayer

#78. Elton John — Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

#79. Lana Del Rey — Norman F*****g Rockwell!

#80. Eminem — The Marshall Mathers LP

#81. Neil Young — After the Gold Rush

#82. 50 Cent — Get Rich or Die Tryin'

#83. Patti Smith — Horses

#84. Snoop Dogg — Doggystyle

#85. Kacey Musgraves — Golden Hour

#86. Mary J. Blige — My Life

#87. Massive Attack — Blue Lines

#88. Nina Simone — I Put a Spell on You

#89. Lady Gaga — The Fame Monster

#90. AC/DC — Back in Black

#91. George Michael — Listen Without Prejudice, Vol. 1

#92. Tyler, The Creator — Flower Boy

#93. Solange — A Seat at the Table

#94. Burial — Untrue

#95. Usher — Confessions

#96. Lorde — Pure Heroine

#97. Rage Against the Machine — Rage Against the Machine

#98. Travis Scott — ASTROWORLD

#99. Eagles — Hotel California

#100. Robyn — Body Talk

[yanderes-galore]

Can I request Yandee future Steven, with your prompts: 38, 57, and 63? Romatic if you don’t mind!

Ohhh, this is in character for the prompts! Have a scenario similar to when Connie rejected his marriage proposal in the show. Obviously Steven needs help in this-

Aged up, post future AU.

Yandere! Future Steven Prompts 38, 57, 63

"My life has been so barren without you...."

"You're stuck with me, like it or not."

"You're my everything!"

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Unhealthy mental state, Manipulation, Potential rebounding, Clingy behavior, Obsession, Guilt-tripping, Fear of abandonment, Slight threat near the end, Angst maybe (?), Darling is oblivious to his obsession, Trauma.

Steven thought he could move on from his relationship trouble when he left Beach City. He thought when he met someone new... he'd move on from Connie. When he met you, he felt whole.

But it just seems to be a repeat of last time.

He had befriended you and considered you his first friend outside of Beach City. As a result he began to cling to you. He felt like you were helping him recover by just being there for him... he wants to keep you by his side forever.

You allowed him to vent to you. You tried to understand his complicated life to help him. You were so similar to him and his need to help, he wanted to cling to the familiarity.

Steven always found comfort in you. For months you've been patient with him. It had barely been a year before he rushed things and popped the question to you.

Would you be willing to date him? Maybe even marry him in the future?

At the time he felt it was the best time to ask. At the time... things felt right. Steven was excited to confess to you.

Then he saw your face.

Ever since then he's created tension between the two of you. Steven often beats himself up about it, he's rushed things and it's his fault like last time. His guilt only drives him to be more desperate.

Which leads to him now, begging at your door while you stand there with a sympathetic face.

It feels horrible to cry in front of you like this, skin tinted pink while you struggle to find a way to help his outbursts.

"My life has been so barren without you...." Steven whimpers, on his knees while he looks up at you with teary eyes. It's like Connie all over again.... He wants you to hold him and tell him it'll all be okay. Even if he knows he doesn't deserve it.

"Oh, Steven... I just said it's a bit too soon. I didn't know you'd be so upset..." You help him to his feet, moving him into your home. He hugs onto you while you awkwardly shuffle him to your couch. His tears soak your shirt. "But don't you think a year is too soon for a proper relationship?"

Steven shakes his head and holds you closer.

"N-No... I don't want to lose you..." Steven sobs, feeling you pat his head and rub his back. "You're my everything!"

You should've known that Steven's mental state would cause him to act like this. He's been through so much according to the stories he's told you. Of course he'd be scared to lose you...

That didn't make this right, however.

"Steven... that's so sweet." You murmur, squeezing him softly before sitting him up properly. His hands quickly find yours and don't let go. "I'm happy you care so much about me."

Steven now has a slight smile on his face, thinking you'll see his side on things.

"... Yet we have time. I'm not going anywhere. We don't have to have a relationship right away."

You pull your hands away from him, only to place them on his shoulders. Steven's stunned but tries to focus on the contact and not the rejection.

"I do care for you... there's no need to be so scared."

Surprised at the fact you aren't entirely trying to push him away, Steven lunges into a hug. You fall onto your back and chuckle when he lays on top of you in a hug. He seemed much happier now.

Steven looks you in the eyes, you swore for a moment you saw something strange swimming within them.

"Okay..." Steven chuckles. "But you're stuck with me, like it or not!"

You assume Steven was teasing you. Although... something about the tone of his voice made you think he wasn't entirely teasing. It felt... darker.

Almost like a threat...

You try not to dwell too much on it, after all it's Steven...!

He'd never actually force you into anything... would he?

[channoticedmeuwu]

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐌 𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 — 𝐂. 𝐒𝐎𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍

tsk — who were you? what were you? that's all 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐈 𝐒𝐎𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍 thought about when you stood next to him on the auditorium stage, smiling at the dozen school photographers and fingers holding a plaque that now belonged to both of you. How dare you; disrupt Part-Time Perfect's chance of being the one and only. How dare you; try to make your way into being the face of the school next to him, after being someone he watched from afar for years?

and how dare you look so fucking hot while doing it

W — reader is a rule follower 1!1!1 so make of that as you will.

a/n — I found out that soobin ACC went to japan (his vlog) after finishing the last chap, so this one is based off him looking for apple flavored hi chews 🫶

ding.

the elevator doors opened as you stood with a packet full of different flavored hi chews, looking at the designs on the carpeted floors to the boys' hotel rooms.

the boys' hotel rooms. you're not allowed to be on this floor, y/n.

you glanced to the side, looking at yourself in the mirror. you seriously don't know what you're doing here, on the floor for boys. If a teacher patrolling caught you, then what would you possibly do? how would you explain yourself?

"oh, Mr. Stanely, it's nothing, really, I'm just here to meet choi soobin!"

and you saw your face in the mirror shape itself to reflect an emotion that you never thought you'd feel when it came to this. we're you....blushing?

fuck, you slapped yourself. you seriously cannot be blushing when it came to choi soobin.

you had absent mindedly started walking in the halls, scanning each room for what seemed to belong to choi soobin and his roommates. you probably wouldn't be able to guess it, if it weren't for hyuck and soobin's laughter echoing in the halls. jesus, they were a loud duo.

so you stood in front of room 63, gripping the shopper of hi chews and twisting your toes in your bunny slippers, trying to dust away a blush creeping on your cheeks. Jesus, y/n, are you about to confess to the love of your life or something? why are you so damn nervous?

you were mad at yourself, you know. because if it wasn't for your carelessness, you wouldn't have lost your bag in the crowd earlier that day. And because of that, you stood here, bracing yourself to face choi soobin and give him a token of your gratitude. couldn't you just punch him and call it even?

you sighed and pressed the doorbell next to the door. something about choi soobin's neatly combed hair with his crooked glasses, his perfectly ironed school jacket with his slightly loose tie, and his polished shoes with his untucked t-shirt — it all just seemed so imperfectly perfect. God, he was seriously perfect, in the most unusual way.

the chatter behind the door had died down, and you heard the conversation between the boys.

"dude, did you order room service?"

"no? check who it is."

"dude, why should I?"

"because I'm too lazy?"

"fuck, what if it's mr stanley? bro, HIDE THAT SHIT."

"fucking hell, it's not mr stanely, hyuck. just open the fucking door."

"fine, fine."

and the door creaked open, revealing a set of wary eyes trying to catch a glimpse of what was outside. and then they blinked, a look of mischief twinkling.

"oh, soobin!" hyuck laughed, tongue in cheek, "your giiirlfriend's heeeere—OW! THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?"

and hyuck disappeared behind the door, mumbling something under his breath as soobin pulled him away and faced you, smiling.

and for some fucking reason, you forgot how to speak.

"soobin!" you tried to improvise, rocking on your feet as you eyed him up and down. "you look—you look—"

pretty fucking cute.

"y/n?" he asked, turning his head to his side and opening the door a bit more, revealing a towel draped over his shoulders. he continued to use it to dry his hair, he must have taken a shower.

goddammit. now he looked cute and smelled nice?

fuck.

he hummed softly, his smile anticipating. he was waiting for you to speak, to say something.

but you couldn't look past his lips, cheeks pink in just the right way to make his dimples obvious. and staring at you, his ears starting turning into darker shades of red.

"jesus, is there something on my face?" he asked, hiding his nose behind his hands and looking away with a scoff. he seriously didn't know how much more of your piercing gaze he could take.

"here," you said, huffing in defeat and looking to the side as you threw the shopper of candy at him, "as a thank you."

"damn, y/n, I didn't think you were capable of humanly emotions?"

"I didn't think you were capable of that face."

he paused, blinking. "what is that even supposed to mean? are you insulti—"

"nothing. nothing at all."

and you turned away, half walking, half running, away from his door and towards the elevator.

fucking hell, y/n, you thought as you entered the elevator, hiding your face behind your hands.

did you just feel nervous in front of Choi Soobin?

29 — room 63

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@soobinsgirlfriend @sooooob

[sanguineterrain]

may i pls request 12 + 63 for robin 🥺

i honestly do not remember what prompt list this was from YIKES but hi nika thank u for sending a robin req, ur a real one <3

12) “Take my jacket, it’s cold outside.” and 63) “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

robin buckley x fem!reader. love confessions and kisses :-) ft. wingman steve (king)

****

One thing about snow in Hawkins is it never falls halfway.

Your parents are away for the weekend and don't know about the two feet of snow that hit last night. You've been content ignoring said snow and staying curled up in the house. You study, watch movies, and make hot chocolate. A whole pot of it, in fact. Snow days are great when you don't have to dig out the car.

You hear a scraping sound outside, like plastic on pavement. You turn off the stove and open the curtain.

It's Robin. She climbs the hill your neighborhood sits upon. She drags a large, green shovel behind her.

She's also nowhere near appropriately dressed for a Hawkins winter. Clad in only a windbreaker and a hat, you know Robin has to be freezing.

You pull on your heavy duty winter coat and scarf and head outside.

"Robin!" you call and start to unravel your scarf.

She looks up. You wonder how she walked all the way here from her house.

"Oh!" She pushes a couple strands of hair out of her face as you approach, cheeks flushed with cold. "H-hey, Y/N."

You stop in front of her, arms crossed.

"What are you wearing?"

She looks down, then at you.

"A... sweater?"

"Exactly! A sweater. It's below freezing. Here, take my jacket. Or my coat. Which do you want? I'll give you my coat first. Should fit you—it's loose on me."

You shrug out of your coat and manhandle her arms through the sleeves. Then you take off your scarf. Robin catches your arm, eyes wide.

"Y/N, it's really okay. I've been shoveling all day, I barely feel the cold anymore."

"Well, that's not a good sign, Robs. Let me put the scarf, come on."

She obediently bows her head so you can wrap the scarf around her neck. Plumes of foggy breath mingle in the air between you. Robin's eyes are a little half-lidded when you're done.

"Thanks," she whispers.

You beam. "You're welcome. Come have some hot chocolate."

"Are you sure? I–I mean, I don't wanna interrupt anything. You're probably having dinner, right?"

You shake your head.

"It's still early. My parents are out for the weekend. You're not interrupting anything. And God, all that shoveling? You must be exhausted."

You take her bare hand in your gloved one and frown.

"Remind me to get you some gloves," you say, and lead her inside.

Robin lets you pull her in. You nudge her into a chair at the kitchen table.

"So," you say. "Marshmallows? Whipped cream?"

"Oh. Um, yes, please. Thank you."

You pour two cups and swirl whipped cream in both. Then you decorate with too many mini marshmallows. You serve the dessert drinks. Robin immediately goes for hers and cream smears on her nose and lips.

She sticks her tongue out and crosses her eyes.

"Do I have something on my face?"

You grin and get a paper towel. Robin stares at you, lips slightly parted as you carefully wipe her face. You fold and toss the paper towel. Robin swallows.

"Th-thanks," she says.

"Sure thing," you reply, feeling a little warm. "Are you cold?"

"No, I'm okay. Your coat is really warm."

"Isn't it? I got it on sale at Sears. I could get you one too if you'd like. I'm a fiend for bargains."

Robin snorts.

"What!" you say. "I am!"

"Nothing, nothing. You're just really nice."

"Robin Buckley, you smooth talker. I do believe Steve is rubbing off on you."

She rolls her eyes. "God, I hope not. We were supposed to shovel together and then three streets before your neighborhood, he said he had to go home. I didn't take the ride; I've been making good money."

"But your fingers are like Otter Pops," you fret, taking her hands in yours.

Robin's cheeks are red again. You stand to feel her forehead.

"You're all flushed, Robs. Do you feel sick? I can make some tea. I also have a box of Hothands."

"N-no," she squeaks, blinking up at you. "I'm okay, really."

"Well, we can call Steve, if you like. I'm sure he'd be willing to pick you up—"

"No!"

Your brows raise. Robin shifts in her seat.

"Um, what I mean is, he's probably busy, you know? Like super busy. He had to drop everything and go so, like, it's not a big deal."

"It's not a big deal that he ditched you?" you ask. "But you guys are best friends. Why would he do that? And right before you had to climb the hill to my house?"

Robin twists her ring around her pointer finger.

"Yeah, weird. But you know, Steve has his whims. He's a... whimsical guy."

You squint. "Did he say why he ditched?"

"Uh, no, no. But like I said, it doesn't really matter."

"Well, you can stay as long as you want. I'd drive you myself but my parents have the car."

"That's okay." Robin smiles. "I like drinking hot chocolate with you."

"I have cookies! Oh my gosh, let me get those out. You'll love these. I made them yesterday."

You flit about the kitchen, getting out plates and the tin of sugar cookies. Robin takes off your and her winterwear, draping them over the chair. Then she unzips her windbreaker, revealing a smart red sweater with snowflakes printed on it and a lace collar.

"That's pretty," you say and take the plates of cookies over.

"Oh, this?" She pushes a loose curl behind her ear. That's when you notice the sparkly red barrettes.

"Those are too!" you gush. "You got all dressed up for shoveling snow?"

"Um... kinda."

You hum. "It's so unlike what you normally wear, Robs. Do you have a date or something?"

"No," she says weakly. "No date."

"Well, any girl would be lucky to have you," you say.

She perks up. "Really?"

"Of course!"

You know Robin's been pining for that Vickie girl in school. And you're okay with that. Robin doesn't even know you're an option, after all. You can't blame her for pursuing other people.

Robin takes a bite of cookie.

"Shit," she says. "These are amazing."

You grin. "I'm glad you like them. I'll give you some to take."

She chews for a bit, then suddenly sets down the cookie.

"Hey," Robin says. "Can I... can I tell you something?"

"Always."

"Okay." She takes a deep breath. "Okay, just... please promise me that if you don't feel the same you won't... we won't stop being friends."

You tilt your head. "Feel the same? Robs, what are you—"

"Please?" she begs. "Please promise me."

"I promise, Robs. We literally fought a DnD monster last year. Nothing could make us stop being friends. Cross my heart and hope to die."

Robin chews her lip hard. She fidgets with her collar.

"Nancy helped me pick this sweater out," she says. "This morning."

"Nancy? Uh, okay... what does that have to—"

"Steve didn't ditch me," she blurts.

You shake your head. "I don't understand."

"I wore this sweater for you."

"For me?"

"I like you, Y/N," she says quietly. "I really, really like you. I didn't choose to shovel this neighborhood by accident. And I'm so nervous around you so Steve suggested I find an excuse to see you and then it snowed and I thought, maybe I can shovel your driveway and I'll finally have a real conversation and stop chickening out! But–but then you gave me your coat and brought me hot chocolate and oh my God, you're like the sweetest girl ever and I really, really like you and—"

"Robin."

She stops, eyes wide. You crouch so you're level with her chair.

"Sorry," she whispers.

You shake your head.

"Sorry for what?" you ask with a smile.

And you kiss her.

Robin makes a surprised noise but she doesn't pull away. Her fingers are cold on your cheek so you cover them with your hands to warm her up. She tastes like hot chocolate and icing. Her lips are chapped and you know her habit of picking at them, so you take care not to tug too hard with your teeth.

She hums, soft and low, and you understand. It feels like you fit.

"Do Steve and Nancy like sugar cookies?" you ask when you pull away.

Robin's brows furrow. "Steve definitely does. Why?"

"Well, I feel like they should get a treat for the parts they played."

Robin grins slyly. "Do I get a treat? I feel like I played a huge part in this, too."

You bite your lip through a smile and tug Robin forward by the collar of her sweater. She catches herself on your arms, blush high on her cheeks.

"Of course you do, Robs. You get all the treats you want."

[bratshaws]

through the hourglass 100. brb x oc

a/n: welcome to chapter 100 pls don't hate me because we aren't even half done and idk how to feel about this. lol

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: none, pure fluff and Rooster being dad material.

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/

50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64/65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77/78/79/80/81/82/83/84/85/86/87/88

/89/90/91/92/93/94/95/96/97/98/99

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-

He got to work the very next day with some difficulty, because now that Nicole could speak, she could direct her words to either of them. So when she saw her father walk around with his uniform, she stretched her little arms with the saddest ‘dada’ leaving her lips.

It was a blessing and a curse, because that tore at his heartstrings. He just dropped everything to pick her up “Oh my baby girl,it’s okay, Dada will be home soon.” Her eyes were shining with tears “Aw man,don’t do this to me,Nikki,” he chuckles sadly, rubbing her tiny hand before bringing it to his lips, kissing those minuscule knuckles over and over as Nicole calmed down.

Beatrice walked out of the kitchen to meet the two, smiling softly, “She’ll be okay,Roos.” she says as her husband just bounces Nikki in his arms, “We are going out today since there’s no more rain and I’ll leave her with my parents later, I just gotta help Penny-” she smiles more when Rooster lifts Nikki up then brings her down to kiss her cheek, “And we’ll go see Marcus and check how the collection is going.”

“Oh,right.” Rooster murmurs on Nikki’s neck,”It’s in December,right?”

“Yeah,Marcus wants to do a launch party of sorts and…well,we were invited. It’s not for long, it’s just so we can see the collection.”

“That’s alright.” Rooster smiles at Nikki, kissing each of her fingers, “It’ll be fun,right? Yeah,it’ll be fun- then we gotta think about Virginia,gorgeous. After Christmas,yea?’

“Hmhm,Nikki needs to have her first Christmas around family.” she says, “Hey,why don’t we invite Mav to the Christmas party? My parents won’t mind.”

Rooster looks from Nicole to Beatrice and there’s something in his eyes that makes him pause. The last time he actually spend a holiday with his godfather…was when he was about twelve? Maybe, his mother invited Mav over and that was…the last time. He wanted to but at the same time he was nervous about it.

Him and Mav were still rekindling their relationship.

Literal baby steps.

But the little Bradley, the one that loved his uncle and wanted him close at all times, wanted Maverick close by. He wanted his uncle to enjoy some time with him and Bea - and her family. Of course he now had Penny but, maybe he just wanted to relive that, “I can talk to him.”

“Yeah?”

‘Yeah, check if he’s going to stay around for Christmas and…if we aren’t deployed, he can say yes.”

Beatrice’s gaze softened, “You sound nervous.”

He laughs awkwardly, holding Nicole close to his lips so he could kiss her head, “A little.” He confesses with his cheek dimpling a bit “I haven’t spent holidays with Mav in so long. And while we are talking again it’s still…fresh you know?”

Beatrice steps closer to him to gently touch his arm, then kiss his jawline once she stands on her her tiptoes “I know,handsome. “ she rubs his jaw with her thumb, feeling the muscle there tense up as he clenches his teeth “It’s up to you,okay? Would you want to have Mav close during the holidays?”

He hesitates, opening and closing his mouth only to nod in silence, nuzzling Nicole’s soft shirt “Okay, if you are sure talk to him. I have a feeling he’ll love it.” And her fingers comb some of the sandy brown strands back, leaning up to kiss his cheek and keep her lips there “It’s your choice, babe.”

“Yeah,”he inhales “I know, gorgeous. I know.”

And after prying Nikki out of him, with some difficulty, he managed to leave. That didn’t mean it was easy for him to approach his uncle and ask if he wanted to join their Christmas party at Beas parents. He kept looking over at Maverick whenever he walked close, his uncle smiling and offering him a two finger wave before walking away.

Rooster chews the inside of his mouth as he thinks on how to approach this, he had to think a bit because he…wanted Mav to say yes but he was also nervous if he said yes. Did Mav even liked Christmas anymore? He didn’t seem to be into the holidays no more from what he’d seen from when they got back to talking…

He better do it now before he chickens out completely.

“Mav!” his uncle stops walking to turn towards him, a clipboard under his arm, “Hey uh, what’s that?”

“Well,” Mav smirks, flipping through the papers, “I’m going to instruct some new pilots and I had to take notes. So I won’t forget things.” he chuckles looking over to his nephew, “Don’t worry you guy were my favorite group.”

Rooster, while happy to hear that, just cleared his throat, “So uh, Christmas. Are you and Penny going somewhere?”

“Not really. Nothing planned.” Mav looks up at his tall nephew, “Why?”

Rooster propped his hands on his hips and pursed his lips a bit, then crossed his arms because he felt too exposed, “Do you…want to spend Christmas with us at Bea’s parents? You,Penny, Amelia…I mean, if you want to. We’d be really happy to have you.” he pauses, “I…I’d be really happy to have you there.”

The older pilot’s gaze was unreadable but something in his light eyes shone, surprise? Happiness?

Confusion?

All that at once?

Maverick opened his mouth to speak, letting out a surprised laugh, “Really?” he asks his nephew who in turn nods, smiling just a little bit. Maverick taps the corner of the clipboard to his palm to fill the surprised silence that surrounded them, “I…I…yeah,yeah I can do that.”

“Really?”

For a split second,Pete saw ten years old Bradley who’d barely reached his stomach, looking up at him during one of his many visits, asking him to stay for Christmas. Carole often approved of it, in fact he thought she wanted him to stay just to give Rooster a sense of familiarity for a little while. “Yeah,really.”

Bradley’s smile widened, his cheeks getting fuller and his eyes shining, “...that’s…great. Thank you,Mav.” he was giddy, like memories of his past were coming back, memories of him and Mav sharing eggnog as his mom cleaned the table after dinner or the two of them sitting together, with Mav trying to build the train tracks he got from his aunt when he was too young to build them.

And maybe he just wanted to revive that moment because he felt like he could. He had a daughter now, he wanted Maverick to be part of her life as well but he had to deal with his own trauma with his uncle along the way. They came a long way from the first time they spoke, but there are still things that happened, distances that were kept.

The little Bradley in him wanted his uncle back.

The grown Bradley did too but had to deal with his own anxieties and traumas.

“Are you going to let me know where her parents live?”

“Yeah, it’s um,” he clears his throat, “It’s in Little Italy, I’ll send you a map and everything too. It…it’ll be fun,right?”

Maverick,whose eyes were still on Bradley, only nodded with a smile, “Yes, it will be fun Brad.” he looks down at his watch, “Oh, shit. Okay,I gotta go.” he gives his nephew a quick hug, backing away from where they stood, gesturing at him with his index finger, “You gonna call me,right?”

“Yeah, I will.”

“Good,oh! By the way, send me a list of things Nicole can play with, I can figure something out to give her in the meantime.”

“I will Mav.” he waves to his uncle, “Don’t worry.”

His uncle smiled more, saluting him again - this time Rooster reciprocate the gesture - and walked away from there, leaving the tall lieutenant alone and staring at nothing for a couple seconds.

That…was pretty good.

Rooster could relax, he told himself to relax and relieve the tension on his shoulders before turning back around to his office. “That was good.” he murmured, “I’m going to tell Beatrice about it, she’s going to love it.” he is loving it, he’s loving it more than he thought he would. He was really nervous about it, he had to admit it, but now that he got a positive response from his uncle?

Well, now he was more than okay it worked.

And…he had to think about what he could give Mav. What could he give Mav? He knew his uncle but giving him gifts was hard because his interests went from zero to one hundred in a matter of seconds. Again he should talk with Beatrice about it, but he’d only be able to message her around lunchtime and he still had…two hours left. “I can handle it.” he murmured to himself, closing the door in his office “I can handle it. I can handle not messaging Bea. I can do that.”

Even if his fingers twitched and itched to grab the phone, even if he just wanted to talk to her now he held back. Rooster inhales to control himself, rolling his neck and shoulders to ease the tension, remembering he had things to do and even if he wanted to talk to Beatrice, he couldn’t.

Not yet.

-

Thankfully time passed fast and he could finally check his phone after grabbing something to eat at the cafeteria. There was one message from Beatrice.

Bea (10:23)

Hi Roos! I didn’t mean to send you a message this early but someone wants to talk to you!:) 

He sat down on his usual spot, Maverick not there yet, to press play. It was a video of Nikki, being carried by Beatrice as they walked through the house “Okay,okay, I know you miss him.” his wife laughs, moving the camera close to Nikki whose light eyes immediately focus on her image.

She stills for a second, tapping her little hand on the screen before Beatrice speaks again, “Do you wanna tell dada what you were doing?” Nicole looked over at Beatrice and smiled “Yes,what were you doing before? What were you doing with mama?”

Nicole proceeded then, without breaking eye contact, to let out a long ‘dadadadadadadadadadada’ that changed intonations every now and again, in fact it only got louder when Beatrice brought her closer to their wedding picture hanging on the wall, “Yes,that’s dada. You miss him a lot,right?”

“Dada! Dada!” one single slap on his picture, “Dada?”

“Daddy is at work, we’ll see him in a few hours.” Beatrice wipes Nicole’s face with her hand, kissing the little girl’s cheek as she walks away from the picture, much for their daughter’s disappointed noise “Daddy’s girl,what did I say?” the camera then shows Beatrice’s smiling face “Anyway,I hope you like the surprise,Roos. She’s been talking nonstop since you left…I love you and I’ll talk to you around lunchtime okay? Oh,one more thing.”

The video ended with Beatrice blowing a kiss to the camera then looking at Nikki, “Can you blow daddy a kiss?” Nicole just blinked, another ‘dada’ leaving her lips so Beatrice had to maneuver her hand to show Nicole what she meant. Nikki did try her best to blow a kiss, but it just looked like she tapped her mouth and smiled at him “Yaay, that’s great Nikki! Say bye dada! See you soon! Bye! Buh-bye!”

And it was over… and Rooster was melting. He was tapping his boots on the floor with his face touching the screen, hiding his absolutely melting smile and the way his cheeks were flushed. He was so happy, he couldn’t be happier. If there was any way to write what he felt he wasn’t sure if he’d know the words.

He composed himself the best he could, messaging Beatrice with the same giddy smile on his face

Roos (12:13)

Baby <333 you are killing me here! She’s so cute, you are so cute. I want to kiss you so bad but I’m not home ugh! That’s evil.

Bea (12:13)

Hi Roos! I’m sorry handsome. She just started doing it and I couldn’t help myself…but I can work on the kisses when you get home :3c promise you that <3 

Roos (12:14)

Oh,baby don’t start with this. I’ll be counting the seconds until I get back

Bea (12:14)

;* me too. Anyway! How’s your day going? Did you talk to Mav?

Roos (12:14)

I did gorgeous. He said yes. So now we have to find something to give him as a gift, I have no idea what it’d be though.

Bea (12:15)

We’ll figure something out :) how are you feeling though? Did the nervousness pass?

Rooster’s thumbs hover over the small device as he thinks about how to reply, licking his lips once he found the words

Roos (12:17)

It did. Yeah,it’s dumb gorgeous. I shouldn’t feel like this, you know? Not anymore.

Bea (12:19)

Roos,honey, you need to understand that these thoughts are normal. You spent a good chunk of your life not talking to Mav, it’s okay to be nervous and scared. I know you love him, I know you want him back in your life and now in Nikki’s life…but certain things your brain can’t really filter and you have a hard time figuring out how to deal with it. You two made a lot of progress in the short time you got back to talking…so please don’t think it’s bad <3 

He was going to kiss her so hard when he gets home

Roos (12:20)

Baby…you always know what to tell me, don’t you?

Bea (12:20)

I do try, Roos. I want you to be okay. <3 I love you and your health - physical and mental - is so important to me.

Roos (12:21)

Bea,you are making this very hard for me. I can’t kiss you. I can’t hug you and I can’t have you close and I want to really badly.

Bea (12:21)

Sorry! But you know,I’m glad it helped. I really am,Roos. I’ll tell my parents :) Is Mav allergic to anything? No,right?

Roos (12:22)

Nothing that I know of,but I can ask him.

A presence, alongside a tray holding food settles itself in front of him and he looks up to see Mav with his sunglasses up to his hair and looking older than he was, “...must’ve been fun.” he smirks, “Good class?”

“It’s amazing how half of them managed to get into adulthood.” he murmurs, flicking his gaze to the group of officers that walked by, some of them throwing waves his way and he offered weak ones back, “They’ll be fine, but they need a lot of work.” he looks over at Rooster, “You could join me.”

“Hm?” 

“During one of the classes,” Maverick shrugs, “We were together at the Uranium facility. They’d like your input.”

Rooster moved his eyes from his phone to his uncle, arching his brow, “I instructed people before Mav. I don’t know if I’d want to again.”

“You’d technically be there as my guest.”

Rooster stops messaging Beatrice to meet his eyes, furrowing his brows a bit and…well,his uncle seemed like he wanted him to say yes. Perhaps because he wanted his company? Because he wanted someone he knew close by? He couldn’t answer, “Your fanboys are there too,” Mav said, “I’m sure they’d love to see you there.”

Bradley chews his lower lip, would he go there, just once? Just to talk to them? “...well…if you– uh, sure.” he says, part of him wants to but the other part…is nervous. 

He should talk to Bea when he gets home.

[doolittle]

okay but why is the tcc so invested in crushed or who‘s dating, it‘s so unnecessary to question random people on the internet about their private life

confession 63

i understand if your just bored and want entertainment but in the end of the day this really doesn’t matter we’re all here to have fun n chill

[rainbow-pop-arts]

N-nothing can go wrong in this last part of my Trigun Maximum vol 10 thoughts for @trigunbookclub….r-right?

Some thoughts on TriMax chap 63-64 under the cut! 

LITTLE WOOWOO

Little did they know, he wasn’t gonna be adopted to a loving home

Wolfwood’s calling himself a killer and a monster again (Aw, Livio’s just sitting alone)

Hey, c.mon now, Wolfwood! Vash surely doesn’t care that you’re one of the bad guys! (＾▽＾;)

Livio epic fail

OH NO

Aw, look at the kids being kids! (˵¯͒〰¯͒˵)

…………….

So this is what they called the couch scene

Oh, he dead

MR. NIGHTOW YOU DID NOT JUST CALLED THE CHAPTER THAT

Bro’s friend just died and literally cooked fried rice

Why is he so direct about that

Vash is dodging the question (Ò_Ó)

His hair is semi-black now! I have entered a new phase of Vash

Anyways, back to minutes after Wolfwood’s death

KNIVES THAT BASTARD! (ÒДÓ)

DAMN, BISH, HE LEFT LIKE THAT????? (╬⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾ Д ⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾) (If Knives somehow knew that Wolfwood’s dead beside Vash, that’s probably why he’s laughing like a maniac. Like he’s laughing that his own brother lost another person who’s close to him)

My dumbass thought he used his powers to make the ingredients for the fried rice

I wanna tell someone that this is after when someone died on the previous chapter 

Shhhh, they’re cope-eating

…..They cope-ate too much

Welp……that’s the end of that volume

That’s all for TriMax Vol 10…… ( ʘ ⌓ ʘ )

Bonus thoughts: Wolfwood……like he’s gone for real????

(Manga: Takopi no Genzai) Okay, so I got something to confess to y’all……I knew Wolfwood was gonna overdose himself all a long so it didn’t impact me that much, but it still hurts there’lI be no more of him. I didn’t knew the reason why he decided to do that before I reached his death. Actually, I think I still don’t know why he did it. Was it because he sees himself too much of a monster? Is it because his healing juices won’t work anymore? Why did Vash just LET him?  Anyways, yaaaay Livio’s part of Vash’s journey now! ╰(▔∀▔)╯……………….NOOOOOOOO NO MORE WOLFWOOD!!!!!! (╯ᗒᗣᗕ╰)

Those freaking fanarts lied to me, man. I saw fanarts of Vash and Wolfwood with Livio wearing a hat and I thought “Oh, looks like there’s gonna be another guy fighting alongside them” but NOOOOO, Wolfwood dies before THAT happens! (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞

[ilikeyoubetterthisway]

Vol. 16 - The Romance Volume: A Ryuumo Analysis (with a bit of Rinshi)

Part 6

Now, I wanted to explain how this volume is all about romance and it is represented in the titles.

I'm gonna proceed to analyze some of the names of the chapters in the different languages I am familiar with, which is the Japanese, English and Spanish version.

Starting with ch. 68 "Naked Festival" and remembering the incidents that occurred there is more than obvious the emphasis given to the physical attraction of the boys towards the girls. We are also presented with the idea of hidden feelings in relation to love and romance. Thanks to the three wise monkeys, their job is to make people be honest about their deepest feelings and desires, and coincidentally, the one who confronts the monkeys is none other than Ryuuji.

We skip ch. 69 which is "The knights of round table" and is more plot driven than anything else, about the artificial gate to Gehenna and all that. (The end of the world? nahh, we got romance here guys) (also I bet you already know the joke of this specific number so i guess there's that too..?), eh, whatever, moving on.

Then we have ch. 70 "Ambition" which is all about the Ryuumo confession on the balcony, with Ryuuji and Izumo blushing at each other for two consecutive panels and later Ryuuji finding his reason to continue becoming and being and exorcist: which is doing it for love.

The following chapter is ch. 71 with the English title of:

Now I will go deep into analyzing this title.

This phrase means that everyone's view of beauty is subjective, and there's no general standard of beauty.

I like this phrase but is not as intense as how I feel the original Japanese nor even the Spanish one.

Here is the Spanish version, since I own that volume, and I also feel like the title in Spanish is more faithful to the original Japanese, and it reads as follows:

Which translated to English it will be read as:

"Causes and effects of falling in love".

This title is a lot more intense than the English version and is being a dead giveaway to the entire romantic situations happening in this volume.

Then in the Japanese version we have this:

Which upon looking it up on a dictionary app, I found that is a proverb that means:

"No matter how unfortunate it is, you cannot stop love"

or also

"Falling in love is an unfortunate fate".

惚れたが因果 - 「ほれたがいんが」 [ho re ta ga i n ga]

>惚れた (ほれた) meaning "to fall in love" in past tense.

>が is the particle that indicates the sentence subject (occasionally object).

>因果 (いんが) has many meanings which are:

As a Noun:

Cause and effect, casualty.

Karma, fate (Buddhism).

Unfortunate, unlucky, ill-fated.

As an Adjective:

Unfortunate.

Doomed, ill-omened, ill-fated, unlucky, ill-starred.

So, 因果 (いんが) means Cause and Effect and at the same time Karma (fate).

(The first definition being completely loyal in the Spanish translation of the title).

Now, I'm sure you all remember about the character's general info on the second volume of the manga, in which Ryuuji's favorite word was stated to be "Karma".

We know how serious he was on the topic of "Fate" as in related to Buddhism and romance during the Weekend Hero novels that had everything to do with him having a love interest and him believing that this random and weirdly specific girl was going to be his fated one. (Pls also note Izumo's presence in the entire chapter, gee, I wonder wHy).

[Here's the link to the novel and credit to the translator @/harezora, thank you very much!]

And also, if you kindly made sure to pay attention and remember (from my Analysis of Ryuuji's Feelings during the Illuminati Arc), the shirt he was wearing in the hospital hallway, had the words "Cause and Effect" on it.

So, he was wearing a shirt with his favorite words on it, of Cause and Effect that could also be read as Karma and Fate, the same chapter where he blushed cough fell in love cough, for this girl, the moment where he learned he shared the same reason for doing things (love for his family and loved ones), and then seven chapters later (ch. 63 -> ch. 70), we have him confessing his feelings to the same girl with the phrase "I like you better this way" on a romantic balcony, the two of them alone, right after being honest with each other, sharing their doubts, thoughts and worries, showing how much they understood each other, feeling calm and safe enough to talk about that kind of deep and intimate emotions, then having him realize his reason to do things was the same as the girl he told he liked better this way which was also why and what he liked from her, and also remember how he was against anything to do with love and romance stuff and then on the chapter title following his direct confession it has the proverb of:

"No matter how unfortunate it is, you cannot stop love".

(It makes sense that is the following chapter since is about "the causes and effects of falling in love", about him realizing his own developing feelings).

Isn't all this trying to tell us something..? As if the whole a$$ balcony confession wasn't clear enough, Kato sensei rlly added intricate fateful symbolism, that was introduced in the second volume, revolving around Ryuuji and the girl he has been paying attention to since the beginning.

Then ch. 72 is "On the way" which is about how the guys are starting to find their paths: Konekomaru being a system developer for a pokedex- Imean, an app that can identify the demons one is fighting against and give you their general info. Shima decided to apply for the Knight position, Rin is doing his best to study, Ryuuji is becoming a great manager with Lightning and Yukio is finding the truth about his eyes.

And finally for ch. 73 is literally "Love Awakens" and is centered around the Rinshi confession, and Rin finally confessing his feelings to Shiemi and Shiemi realizing that he's talking about love and not just friendship.

So we first got the confession for the secondary couple followed by the main couple just three chapters later, this backed up by a tense moment of physical attraction and long staring on the first chapter of the volume.

This entire volume was about physical attraction, whole a$$ confessions and romance as well as finding your place and role for the future.

And just throwing one last symbolism in here, the number 16 in numerology means introspection, intuitiveness, wisdom, independence, family and self-achievement, representing all the new changes and development that all the characters have been getting, both in their personal (goals), and social (romantic), aspect.

Thank you for following these analysis!! If you were wondering where is part 4 and 5.... ._. I haven't written them yet, lmao, the motivation and inspiration doesn't appear and I had this part on my drafts for months by now (is literally my second draft starting from the beginning) but they will eventually come.

In the meantime, thanks for reading! See you in the next one~!! <3

[hollyhomburg]

Before I Leave You (Pt.63)

(Sneak Peak) (Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)

Summary: You never thought that just cuddling with Hobi on a cold day could lead to this; his pants off and you begging "Daisy please-"

Tags: fluff, a little hurt but mostly just comfort, First times, soft cuddle sex, unintentional mutual somnophilia, knotting, scenting, under clarified limits, small triggers after sex, small references to past abusive relationships, love confessions.

W/c: 12.1k

A/n: thank you guys for being patient for this next chapter :) it's one of my favorites so please give it lots of love when it comes out!

Previous part ~ Masterlist

~-~

Chapter 63: Fizz and Burn (Sneak Peak)  

The light comes through the windows all honey yellow, turning the bookshelves that Yoongi made gold instead of white. Turns the tops of Hobi’s hair a little red too. The brown turning to a rainbow of ocher in the sunlight.

"Go back to sleep." You hum, already half there. He pulls you a little on top of him, holding you with a firmness usually reserved for too large packages and the tenderness reserved for very fragile very precious things. It makes your whole body feel tingly at the edges, the way it does when you come inside from a rainstorm. All dry and taken care of.

“Thanks for not leaving the nest when everyone else did,” you think he might be asleep for how long it takes him to answer. But everything in the last 24 hours has left you feeling like you don’t want to be alone, that you can’t be left by yourself.

He breathes up and it presses against your stomach. “Didn’t want to go. Wanna stay in the nest with you.” He murmurs, “Is that okay?”

Your hand finds his arm and you use it to tug yourself closer, getting your forehead against his shoulder, the headphones slipping from your ear.

“Yeah. It’s always okay.”

You shut your eyes and Hobi tucks your hair behind your ear and puts the headphones back in.

The next time you wake it’s because noodle is licking at your forehead, grooming you, and you hear the shutter sound of Hobi’s camera, his small giggle. You swat at noodles face and he bats at you a little before settling on the small of your back, fighting Hobi for necessary real-estate and howling when he pushes him off. “Nu, be quiet,”

Hobi’s hushed words are answered with a equally quiet meow that sends you straight off to dreamland.

The next time you wake is not so innocent.

You’re a little too close, cuddling with Hobi in a way that you might with Yoongi, with Namjoon, with Jungkook. All warm and snug hot. Bodies and dreams tangled so thuroughtly it's hard to tell where dreamy wants begin and fragile delights end.

You’re warm at your front from Hobi and warm on your back from the sunshine streaming through the window. Warm all the way through. Until he moves his hand and you realize that’s from him too. His fingers splayed over your spine.

You think you can be forgiven for confusing them. Hoseok and sunlight are one in the same.

The apex of your thigh is pressed tight to his hip just where his thigh starts. Your leg hitched over his hip and tight to it. The fabric of his sweatpants and the fabric of your pajama shorts are all bunched up from your movements. Your knee bent at a comfortable angle. His scent is heady in your nose, pressed to the low tugged collar of his shirt just over his heart.

As close as you can be but still not enough.

You don't even realize your hips are moving, sleepily grinding against his thigh until it's too late and Hobi grabs your hips and groans.

Coming Saturday November 18th at 5pm EST (Time Zone Adjustments Below)

[spideyswebhead]

I posted 924 times in 2022

147 posts created (16%)

777 posts reblogged (84%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@iguessweallcrazyithinktho

@theglitterymess

@allegras-sunflower

@parkersdahlia

@dancewyou

I tagged 287 of my posts in 2022

#indie rambles - 94 posts

#stranger things - 22 posts

#shannon💙 - 15 posts

#cassian andor - 9 posts

#andor spoilers - 5 posts

#gilmore girls - 5 posts

#star wars - 5 posts

#eddie munson - 5 posts

#steve harrington - 5 posts

#stranger things 4 spoilers - 5 posts

Longest Tag: 63 characters

#queerbaiting was the worst word the internet got their hands on

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

13 notes - Posted August 9, 2022

#4

I swore she would outlive all of us

14 notes - Posted September 8, 2022

#3

I need someone to figure out where Mark and Ethan got their shirts

Cause they look so cool and I'm obsessed

17 notes - Posted November 14, 2022

#2

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　Intro　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Welcome to my tumblr!

I'm a pansexual, demisexual writer who loves to write about their favorite characters in her spare time.

Who will I write for? (coming soon)

You can request anything you would like! Just nothing too heavy, mainly cause I know I won't do it justice and I'd rather not spread misinformation! I'm autistic and I know how it feels to read another fic of wrong information.

But also when you request anything please let me know what pronouns and gender of the reader you'd like! Otherwise I'll assume it's Gender Neutral <3

name : Indie

age : 21 (march 8th)

pronouns : she/they

triggers : gore, surgery (imagery mainly), Clair de Lune

| Gaming Shelf |

| Movie and TV Shelf |

| Bookshelf | wip

See the full post

19 notes - Posted April 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Stargazing | Robin Buckley

Pairing | Robin Buckley x F!Reader

Summery | Robin got an unexpected visitor at her window at 2 AM, asking her to go stargazing.

Content Warning | Robin being a complete simp for y/n, love confession, first kiss

Word Count | 1.6k

AN | while I was writing this I found this playlist that's perfect for this, so you can listen to it while reading! <3 and this was inspired by this prompt list

[ gif belongs to - @songs4themoon ]

Tap, tap… tap, tap

Robin breathed as she cracked an eye open, turning in her bed and looking out the window, seeing a finger tapping gently with some eyes poking underneath. For a second Robin tensed as she stared as her brain processed what was happening, who was at her window? And was it a murderer just starting to freak her out? She tugged her blankets closer to her chin.

Then the head popped up and Robin recognized the girl and she felt like she could breathe. It was just Y/N.

Then the second thought came to her, why was Y/N here?

Robin’s eyes flicked up to her alarm clock - 1:45 am - she should be asleep, they had work tomorrow. She pulled her covers off and walked over to the window, sliding it open to look at the girl standing outside her window. “It’s almost 2 am, what are you doing here?”

“Want to stargaze?”

Robin blinked at her owlishly, not expecting that coming out of the girl's mouth. Robin and Y/N have gotten quite close since she started working at the video store, she seemed to be on the more impulsive side as she always tells stories of some wild adventure she went on, constantly talking about just going out on drives without a plan of what she would do. Robin loved hearing her tell those stories when it was a slow day and Steve was busy doing inventory or putting tapes away.

When Robin didn’t seem to have an answer, she continued. “I can’t sleep and the stars look really pretty today - or tonight really - and I don’t want to go alone, so you’re the first person who came to mind.”

“We have work in the morning.”

“So?” She shrugs with a grin, “c’mon, it’ll be nice!”

Robin debated it in her head if she should sneak out her window tonight and stargaze with her co-worker at 2 in the morning, knowing she would be exhausted since she had school in 3 hours and her entire shift, she hoped it would be another slow day so she wouldn’t need to use her brain too much cause it was tempting to say yes.

So Robin decided to follow Y/N’s many storys and be impulsive. Just say yes. “Okay,”

The smile on Y/N's face warmed her insides, the excitement seeming to build in the girl as she stepped back from Robin’s window. “Let’s go, Buckley!”

“Alright, alright, let me put on some shoes.”

Robin slipped on some socks and her sneakers, grabbing a large hoodie to keep warm, despite the hot weather of the last bit of summer the night could sometimes still be cold, but she tied it around her waist and climbed out of her window.

Y/N guides Robin through the darkness to her car where she slides into the driver’s seat, Robin settling in the passenger side. Y/N drove them into the night. The soft sound of music drifting out of the radio on low volume. Neither moved to turn it up or down.

Some part of Robin worried the car of Y/N’s car would wake up her parents, but none of the lights came on as she backed up so they had to be in the clear. Robin wouldn’t be in trouble.

Another part of Robin wondered where the girl would be taking her to stargaze? When Robin thought she would stop she continued. She didn’t say a word either as she stared straight ahead at the road.

Robin turns her head to watch Y/N side view, her eyes running over the outline of her profile, the dip from her forehead to the bridge of her nose, all the way to her lips.

Every once in a while she would bite or lick her lips to rehydrate them, a reddish hue developing on them the more she did it.

Robin snapped out of looking at the girl's profile, looking ahead at the road and wringing her hands together for a moment. “Why can’t you sleep?” Robin speaks first.

Y/N glanced over before returning her gaze forward again, shrugging her shoulders. “Brain won't shut up. So I decided to instead stare at my ceiling, stare at the stars instead.”

Some parts of Robin related to the feeling. When her thoughts wouldn’t stop and sleep wouldn’t overcome her. Usually she would do something else in her room, like study some piece of music or work on homework she had left over. Why did she think of her?

See the full post

287 notes - Posted September 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[violette-hue]

I posted 250 times in 2022

That's 140 more posts than 2021!

116 posts created (46%)

134 posts reblogged (54%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ceo-of-daichi

@kagejima

@witchthewriter

@kingdaddydaichi

@violette-hue

I tagged 147 of my posts in 2022

Only 41% of my posts had no tags

#matchups - 63 posts

#fandom match ups - 63 posts

#thank you! - 53 posts

#i hope you enjoy! - 42 posts

#match up - 42 posts

#violette-hue - 24 posts

#match ups - 22 posts

#haikyuu - 20 posts

#game of thrones - 14 posts

#harry potter - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 55 characters

#i’m really hoping i get an apple pencil to try some art

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

First Time Headcanons

(George Weasley, Fred Weasley, Bill Weasley, Draco Malfoy)

Requests are open

500 Match-Up Event

Minors do not interact. 18+ only.

George Weasley

He'd be very nervous, but not because it's hist first time. It's yours.

And he really doesn't want to fuck it up

He loves you so so much, he just wants everything to be perfect

He has thing whole night planned, right?

To wine and dine you, to woo you some and then make love to you until dawn

When it comes down to actually doing it, he's so shaky, poor baby had a little hard time pushing into your entrance

But when the pink head of his cock buries into you, he's a moaning mess

It's not as magical as he thought, but it was so worth it

The aftercare is so sweet

He makes sure to give you a hot towel and give you lots of kisses and cuddles

See the full post

723 notes - Posted October 5, 2022

#4

I just read ‘Let’s get to know one another’ with Robb Stark and Reader and fell in love with it! Since your requests are open, is it possible to get a second part to this fic?? Like with Talisa trying to hurt the reader after the reader and Robb reveal that they are expecting a child?? And Robb panics and freaks out on Talisa and is super worried about the reader and confesses they love the reader?

Summary: Part two to Let’s Get to Know One Another. Talisa is not happy and threatened that you are expecting Robb’s child first.

Trigger Warning(s): pregnancy, vomit, mentions of vomit, violence, mentions of violence, jealously, cheating/affair, mentions of an affair, unedited

Word Count: 2.6k

A/N: Thank you so much! I happy you loved it 😊 Hopefully you’ll love this one just as much! I , however, don’t think this is one of my best works. I don’t think Talisa is an aggressive person to hurt anyone, so I  had to kinda make things up. Sorry if you don’t like it!

500 Match-Up Event

Requests are open!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

You knew Talisa would be a problem from the moment you agreed that Robb could have his affair. As of late, she had been pining for his attention more than usual. Of course, Robb had obliged. You couldn’t understand how Robb could make love to you one night, then rendezvous with Talisa the other.

To make matters worse, your feelings had grown for Robb. So much so that nearly the scent of him lingering on his pillow called you down. You loved him with every fiber in your being. If only Robb felt the same way.

You sighed, pushing a fat sausage across your plate. You had no appetite, the smell of the sausage making you more nauseous than anything. You didn’t want sausage, you didn’t want eggs or toast. You wanted stew. A nice, rich and warm beef stew. You sighed again.

“Are you alright? That’s the second time you’ve sighed,” Robb asked, looking over at you with worry.

You looked over at him startled. “I’m fine, My Lord,” you responded, placing your fork down. “Just tired.”

A couple of guards snickered, no doubt their minds in the gutter. Robb shot them a glared and they immediately ceased.

“You haven’t even had a bite of your food,” he stated, reaching over to grab your hand. He idly brushed his thumb along your knuckles.

You smiled at him in hopes to quash his worry. “I’m not hungry, my love,” you said and blushed at the pet name. We’re you allowed to address him like that in front of everyone?

Robb’s eyes softened and he smiled back. “Please do try to at least eat some of your breakfast.”

You nodded, removing your hand from his to grab your fork. All you had to do was eat one sausage, then Robb would be content. You stabbed the sausage with your fork and took a small bite. Nausea rolled through your body like violent waves and you fought to keep the small piece down. You took another bite, this time bigger and chewed. Robb smiled to you and started conversation with his mother, his eyes away from you. You took a few more bites of the sausage, chewing the meat, but not swallowing it. Once it was gone from the plate, you stood, silently excusing yourself and made way to your chambers.

Unfortunately, you weren’t able to make it to your chambers before you doubled over and vomited. A nearby handmaid rushed to your aid, pulling your hair out of your face and rubbing your back.

“Are you alright, m’lady?” she asked, helping you step away from the bile.

You shook your head. “I’m so hungry,” you said, wiping your mouth with your handkerchief. “But I can’t stomach breakfast.”

The handmaid smiled sheepishly. “Would you like to make a request of the kitchen?”

You thought for a moment. You didn’t want to bother the kitchen staff with a silly request. But, ultimately, you didn’t think you could stomach anything but beef stew.

You nodded. “Please—beef stew.”

The handmaid arched her brows, a look of surprise drawn on her features. The surprise quickly left and was replaced with a small, gleeful smile.

“I’ll let the cooks know and bring the stew to your chambers.”

You nodded and made your way to your chambers. Tiredness seeped into your bones out of nowhere and you sat down at the foot of your bed. Perhaps, if you just lay down for a bit...

See the full post

1,004 notes - Posted May 27, 2022

#3

Geralt.

Summary: Geralt saves you from vampires and you won’t stop rubbing your ass against him. 

Trigger Warning(s): minors do not interact, smut with very little plot, cursing, violence, death, almost dying, chocking, unprotected sex, slight/lowkey breeding kink(?)

Word Count: 4.2k

A/N: My first Geralt fic :) Hope y’all enjoy!

Requests are open!

Winter had always been so harsh, too harsh for your liking. You watched your breath come out in white wisps and frowned. Though you had always enjoyed the white flurries descending from the sky, you much more preferred them from indoors. You must have been the biggest fool you knew to be out in this type of cold. But the rumors the locals fed you were far too interesting for you to ignore.

You needed the coin just as badly as you needed some warmth. And safe lodgings. This job would provide enough money for hot food in your belly, a new set of warmer clothes, and lodgings. All you needed to do was kill this vampire. But sneaking around in the woods lead you to a nest. With multiple vampires. If you survived, if you actually managed to kill this entire hoard, you’d surely demand more payment.

But that was the last thing to have on your mind. Not as one of the vampires snuck up behind you and took a good bite from you neck. You could feel the blood in your body being sucked out, could feel your limbs go numb as the vampire fed on you. 

See the full post

1,081 notes - Posted May 29, 2022

#2

Let’s Get to Know One Another

Summary: Robb Stark has to pick a wife out of Lord Frey’s daughters. He chooses you. What will happen when you’ve agreed to allow him to continue his affair with Talisa?

Trigger Warning(s): angst, cheating/affair, smut, virgin, marriage, man+woman, fem!reader, mentions of pregnancy/bearing children, 18+ only, **minors do not interact**

Word Count: 3.6k

A/N: Hi guys! It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. I’ve finally made 200! So to celebrate, here’s my first Game of Thrones fic.

500 Match-Up

Part One | Part Two

Requests are open!

Your heart felt heavy as your handmaidens assisted you dress. Today was supposed to be a happy day, a day to rejoice. And yet you couldn’t even muster a smile.

Today you would wed Robb Stark, the new Lord of Winterfell and the proclaimed King of the North. He had chosen you to be his wife in return for your father to allow him and his men to cross the Twins. Robb had promised marriage upon his return, and that nearly didn’t happen. He had fallen in love with someone else, he told you. So naturally, Robb didn’t want to proceed with the marriage, claiming it was not the honorable thing to do, but thankfully you convinced him otherwise. If his wife knew and consented to the affair, it wouldn’t matter. What would matter, however, would be your father pledging his allegiance with the Lannisters to return the humiliation and destroy him. And now, here you were, already becoming the other woman in your beautiful wedding dress. What were you to do?

You raised your head and took a deep breath. Nothing. Move on with life as if everything was normal. That’s what you would have to do.

You slipped on the furry, white hand muffs and allowed yourself to be escorted to the Godswood. There, Robb stood in his regalia, sporting a dark brown fur cloak with matching boots. The darkness of his clothes was a stark contrast of the pure white snow around him, of the pure white of your dress. His reddish brown curls glistened with melting snowdrops and brushed his brow. Robb looked up to you, his steel blue eyes locking on yours. You should smile at him, that was the bridal thing to do, but you couldn’t. His eyes held no love in them, no want. What had you gotten yourself into?

You approached to stand next to him, and before you knew it you had numbly said your vows. You were now man and wife. The Lord and Lady of Winterfell.

Robb guided you back inside, into the grand hall where a large feast was laid. Musicians immediately started up with song and the merriment began. You sat at the head of the table next to Robb and looked at your guests. You were watching a couple dance lovingly together when loud laughter nearby caught your attention. You looked to your right to see Robb smiling brightly at a beautiful woman. Her hair was dark, her skin tan, and her eyes… This must be the woman Robb had fallen for. Why else would they look at one another as if they were the only ones that existed?

Your empty stomach rolled and you could feel bile rising in your throat. You stood abruptly, many of the guests looking your way.

“I feel ill. I’ll be retiring for the night,” you said, stepping around your chair.

You saw Robb scrunch his brows as he watched you leave, but you gave him no opportunity to speak. You were already reaching the hallway.

A guard showed up at your side and gave you a sympathetic look. You ignored it. Of course you knew seeing him with someone else would be hard, but you didn’t think it would be this hard. Further, you didn’t think he would choose her over you at your own wedding. You chewed on the inside of your cheek and sucked in a sharp breath, reminding yourself of your place. You were the other woman, not her.

When you finally approached your chambers, you had a handmaid draw a warm bath, then leave. You wanted to be alone. No one would see you cry. You peeled your dress off and stood in front of the full length mirror. A satin, sheer night slip hug onto your body, your nipples perked up with the cold. You turned slowly, examining your figure through the sheerness of the slip. How disappointing to waste such an appealing dress.

You made work to pulling the pins out of your hair and allowed your locks to fall down your shoulders. Would Robb even be interested in consummating the marriage? You pursed your lips. You knew you would like to. You’d like to know what Robb would feel like inside you—how it would feel for him to move inside you. An ache throbbed between your legs and a small gasp passed through your lips. What was this reaction? You shook your head and turned from the mirror, yanking the straps off your shoulders. There was no point in imagining. You were sure he would choose that woman over you.

The door to your chambers opened and closed as you shimmied out of the sheer slip. “I told you I’d like to be alone,” you said, tossing your hair over your shoulders and walking to the basin.

You turned to step into the basin and caught sight of who had entered the room. Your eyes widened at the sight of Robb and you tripped, falling into the small basin. Water splashed onto the floor, leaving the basin half empty. You managed to bring yourself up on your knees and hold onto the walls of the basin as you cough up the water that was accidentally inhaled.

In a matter of seconds, Robb was at your side, one hand cupping your cheek gently as the other tucked your hair behind your ear.

“Are you alright?” Robb asked worriedly.

You nodded. “I wasn’t expecting you,” you admitted. “You caught me off guard.”

Robb smiled gently and helped you to your feet. Standing in the basin, you were eye to eye with him. 

“Are you hurt..?” Robb’s eyes trailed down your body, and you became very aware of your nakedness. 

A fervent blush creeped up your cheeks and you shook your head. “Not physically,” you mumbled. “Would you...help me out? Almost all the water is gone and it’s run cold.”

Robb nodded and placed his hands on your waist. He lifted you with ease, setting you down gently in front of him. You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. 

“Did you come here for a reason?” you asked, hurriedly reached for the discarded white slip and rolled it on. It didn’t feel right to be so vulnerable in front of him. 

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1,246 notes - Posted May 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Jealous

Summary: Steve really doesn't like the person you're interviewing, so afterwards he fucks you sensleess.

Trigger Warning(s): unprotected sex, cursing, degradation, slight forcing, mentions of breeding kink, not proof read, maybe some typos

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: Happy early birthday @ceo-of-daichi ! Possessive Steve is the best Steve~ (P.S. - I drank some tea for the flu in hops that it'll make me feel better, so the last half of this was written with a drowsy mind).

**Minors and ageless blogs do not interact. 18+ only**

“You’re interviewing him?”

You turned to look at your boyfriend as you buttoned up your blouse. You cocked a brow at the tone of his implication. You had been getting ready for a meeting for an interview that was to be done in an hour when he stalked into the room.

Ever since Steve had found out you were interviewing Loki for his part in the literal destruction of New York City, he had been making comments here and there on why this was a bad idea. Maybe he was right, but you were just over the moon Loki had even agreed to do an interview with you.

"Babe, I don't really see what's the problem," you responded nonchalantly, taking your time to button up the last few buttons. To show some boobage or to not. You chewed on the inside of your lip in thought.

Steve scoffed. "Are you kidding me? He just tried to take over New York City, causing millions in destruction. He's dangerous."

"Dangerous." You repeated. "Everyone is dangerous, Steve, even The Avengers. Besides, there's going to be, like, a bunch of police guys there guarding him. I actually think they might be S.H.I.E.L.D. agents."

You watched as the muscles on Steve's arm flexed as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Jesus Christ, Steve--"

"Language--"

"Why don't you just come with me? Brood in the corner like my silent protector."

It was silent for a few heartbeats, and you thought Steve might laugh in your face. Instead, he shook his head, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Fine," Steve said, leaning back against the door frame. "Button up your shirt again, I missed the show."

You giggled and rolled your eyes, but obeyed. You unbuttoned your blouse, then buttoned it back up again slower this time, giving a good show.

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3,554 notes - Posted November 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[vvh0adie]

I posted 1,009 times in 2022

That's 1,009 more posts than 2021!

120 posts created (12%)

889 posts reblogged (88%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jung-koook

@jeonjcngkook

@namchyoon

@taechnological

I tagged 976 of my posts in 2022

Only 3% of my posts had no tags

#the diligent - 98 posts

#the envious - 89 posts

#the humble - 65 posts

#the patient - 63 posts

#the charitable - 61 posts

#the virtues - 58 posts

#the kind - 52 posts

#the wrathful - 47 posts

#the temperate - 44 posts

#the greedy - 39 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#but it also sucks cuz i have to keep myself from writing plot and dialogue in my head or i will forget it once done wit said mundane task

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Claret Cravings | OT7 | Tails and Tushies

How did an annual check up turn into morning sex? I guess there’s other ways to test the boys’ stamina.

⇴ pairing(s): vampire bat!ot7 x mortician witch!reader ⇴ type: oneshot ⇴ words: 4.8K ⇴ rating: 18+ / M ⇴ genre/au(s): angst | fluff | smut | crack | romance | horror | hybrid au | vampire au | magic au | witch au | a/b/o dynamics ⇴ warning(s): strong language | AAVE (African American Vernacular English) | positive overstimulation | slight mmf | crying | blood | orgasm denial/teasing | breeding kink | pain kink | voyeurism | exhibitionism | aftercare | deep kissing | fingering (r rec) | dry humping (r/m rec) | nipple play | oral (m rec) | anal play (r rec) | rough unprotected vaginal sex | biting (m rec) | scratching (m rec) | growling | ball groping (m giv) | hand job (m giv) | bodily fluids | knotting (r rec) ⇴ a/n: IT WASN’T SUPPOSE TO BE LIKE THIS!!! I tried so hard not to add full blown smut but got carried away. I even thought about making a second version with just fluff and some suggestive elements. LORD HAVE MERCY ON ME😭😭😭 P.S. If you have a problem with AAVE, don’t even bother engaging with ANY of my work. It probably wasn’t written for you no way. We literally in the fucking South.

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83 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

#4

Claret Cravings | OT7 | Midnight Mount

You’re suppose to be foraging for mushrooms but instead you’re rolling around on the forest floor with your lover like actual wild beast. Typical really.

⇴ pairing(s): vampirebat!ot7 x morticianwitch!reader | jin x reader ⇴ type: oneshot ⇴ words: 4.1K ⇴ rating: 18+ / M ⇴ genre/au(s): angst | fluff | smut | romance | horror | hybrid au | vampire au | magic au | witch au | a/b/o dynamics ⇴ warning(s): strong language | AAVE (African American Vernacular English) | biting (m rec) | scratching (m rec) | growling | rough sex | crying | humping | spitting (r rec) | slick eating | unprotected vaginal sex | vaginal fingering | unprotected anal sex (r rec) | knotting (r rec) | deep kissing ⇴ a/n: Reading all this Seokjin fanfic actually made me fall in love with the man😭 That is literally quite sickening that I can cry over a man that doesn’t even know I exist, let alone the act of crying over a man is.....

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90 notes - Posted December 14, 2022

#3

When Weeds Poke | KNJ | index

It’s a bird. No, it’s a plane. Well, no again... it’s your friendly neighborhood serial killer! Suave man by day, skilled killer by night. So what happens when you confess that you may have tried out his profession by accident? Well he cleans it up, of course. Oh~, you’re such a dummy.

Started: Sep. 8, 2022 | Finished: ~~ | Status: ongoing | Last Update: Sep. 1, 2022

⇴ pairing(s): serialkiller!namjoon x elementaryteacher!reader ⇴ type: series ⇴ words: 2K ⇴ rating: 18+ / R ⇴ genre/au(s): angst | fluff | smut | romance | drama | horror | pwp | s2l | serial!killer au ⇴ warning(s): specifics provided each part | [gen: overall very gory] ⇴ a/n: I’m having too much fun with this cuz my radical brain gets to destress by putting all my unhinged thoughts in this fic😭 ⇴ What is Namu bumpin’? CD Binder ⇴ tracking: #fic: when weeds poke | #wwp: ask | #wwp: feedback | #wwp: mentioned | #wwp: vibes

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102 notes - Posted September 1, 2022

#2

Claret Cravings | OT7 | index

Coming Soon

Started: Sep. 24, 2022 | Finished: ~~ | Status: ongoing | Last Update: Dec. 14, 2022

⇴ pairing(s): vampirebat!ot7 x morticianwitch!reader ⇴ type: series ⇴ words: 14.1K ⇴ rating: 18+ / R ⇴ genre/au(s):  angst | fluff | smut | romance | horror | hybrid au | vampire au | magic au | witch au | a/b/o dynamics ⇴ warning(s): specifics provided each part | [gen: overall very kinky] ⇴ a/n: Just something about taking care of the boys seems so right. Plus not to mention the massive impact they’ve had on my life, so I feel like I’d want to do the same even if it is a fiction world where I let them drink my blood😭🥺 ⇴ What’s playing on the gramophone? Vinyl Cabinet ⇴ tracking: #fic: claret cravings | #cc: ask | #cc: feedback | #cc: mentioned | #cc: vibes

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113 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Claret Cravings | OT7 | Skin of the Mother, Mouths of the Babes

Emotions run high when you tell your lil’ vampire bats that they won’t be drinking cow’s blood this week. It stresses you out, and they unfortunately feel the brunt of it.

⇴ pairing(s): vampire bat!ot7 x mortician witch!reader ⇴ type: oneshot ⇴ words: 5.2K ⇴ rating: NC-17 ⇴ genre/au(s): angst | fluff | smut | romance | horror | hybrid au | vampire au | magic au | witch au | a/b/o dynamics ⇴ warning(s): strong language | blood | mentions of trauma | sexual innuendos | anxiety attack | meltdown | crying | hurt feelings | deep kissing | groping (r rec) | Namjoon a lil horny | Kookie and Tae like boobs ⇴ a/n: So while writing this, I was doing research on bats and they actually have infrared vision so that they can find the hottest, blood-letting spots on the body. But that also means the boys would be able to see you blush before it appears. But I say all that to say, they would be able to see darkskin women/femmes blush (I mean you can actually see it with the human eye, if you cared enough, but hey), and I think that’s the cutest thing ever. I try not to describe my oc’s too much other than some staple black aesthetics, so that every black girl/femme can feel seen.

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196 notes - Posted October 30, 2022

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